#[ her name isnt even clever im sorry ]

[dutysoverlove]

@akajustjessicajones

(✉️ ➡️ ASSica ): tony is still talking to rumiko (✉️ ➡️ ASSica ): not only that his dumbass is helping her with /work/ (✉️ ➡️ ASSica ): and listening to her relationship problems  (✉️ ➡️ ASSica ): [unsent i hate you but (✉️ ➡️ ASSica ): [unsent] ig i should leave that part out (✉️ ➡️ ASSica ): he won’t fucking listen to me but i figure you can knock some sense into him (✉️ ➡️ ASSica ): [unsent] literally -- actually don’t hit him pls

[faorism]

BILLOWS BEAT OFF WHISPERED WINGS: A DAEMON AU: i will be posting more of this series here and on ao3! i might change the title, who knows

hardison is an eastern red bat named t'pris (they thought it was spelled teepris until they watched star trek and were like AH designated trekkie by birth name). settled age sixteen. he is a witch that traveled dimensions when he was young, triggered by when he felt particularly lonely. then he got to nanas and he was :(( so he had the look in his eye and Nana was like OH NO YOU DONT and turns out she is a witch too. he does age at a human rate, unlike nana. 

parker's is a raccoon named jack, settled age nine. he had taken to rabbits and hares when she was very small, because they loved bunny. she was convinced he would be a jackalope (hence, why she think she gave him the name jack, but they cant remember if that was his given name in the first place). settled when her foster father took Bunny and jack needed lil clever thief hands to steal bunny back. they are stretched but not separated, so that jack can help out with thievery.

eliot has a cecropia moth, which is the biggest n.american moth. her name is hazel (although eventually hazel will use they/them, but im not sure when that will start). settled age fifteen. hazel and eliot are severed by age twenty-four, as is typical with elite soldiers and contractors and such. they do not have a good relationship, because age twenty-eightish, eliot abandoned left hazel with toby because eliot knew he was getting into some bad shit and didn't want her hurt.

MORE HEADCANONS ABOUT THE OT3 (but mostly hazel since the series would be mostly in her pov) IN THIS VERSE BELOW

when hazel realized eliot wasn't coming back for her, she begged toby to bring her to aimee. (partly because his daemon and her didn't mesh, partly because hazel missed aimee, and partly because she didn't want eliot to ever find her if he decided to drag his ass back.) 

when the crew does the job for the martins, aimee and her horse daemon hickory tell hazel she has to go back to eliot because (1) he's changed, give him a chance but mostly (2) aimee has to move on. hazel is Not Happy, especially when she learns eliot carries around a prosthetic dormant cicada in a bug case claiming thats his daemon.

hazel ignores eliot but does go to his apartment to grouse, and when they make it to boston she strictly hangs out at nates. 

since shes always there, hazel gives comfort to parker when parker comes crying after the psychic job, landing on her knee. parker is like. oh. i can feel how fuzzy your body is, i really like that, you probably feel... and hazel tells parker she can pet her. parker gets a couple strokes in before starting to cry, the last time she touched another person's daemon being her little brother's. 

hazel quickly falls into trust/in love with parker, who kinda just is like. okay so i guess hazel is mine now. everyone is like UM THATS NOT HOW THIS WORKS. but hazel, parker, and even eliot are like. hazel is her own daemon and can do what she wants independent of eliot (they are so stupid omg). hazel starts to go out on jobs grifting as parkers daemon, staying in her hair like an elegant headpiece while jack goes and does thievery.

later, hazel tries to get cozy with hardison but alec is like ABSOLUTELY NOT, STOP FLIRTING WITH ME, I AM NOT TOUCHING YOU. and then parker is like, duh, go ahead? we are dating and even though jack isnt ready, hazel is and she is independent. but alec is like, okay that's nice but also eliot is involved in this IM SORRY HAZEL, HE IS. so consent is not obtained. 

eliot eventually catches him and is like. hazel came to talk with me, saying you wanted "both coparent's" permission. just.... you have it. and alec is like. .......... internally: goddddddddsd I wanna kiss him so badddddd

when Alec is buried, poor t'pris was left behind, clinging to nate's coywolfs fur. She won't let go, so she ends up in the car with nate and eliot. they go in one direction and she starts freaking out, yelling that it's the wrong direction, they are gonna break them apart. they turn around immediately but t'pris is inconsolable. the coywolf and hazel both are like, come back here now eliot, she needs human warmth. eliot refuses to touch her, so he scoops her into his beanie and cradles her to his chest. 

after the ordeal, t'pris absolutely wants to be cuddled by eliot all the time as her and alec are dealing with The Trauma, so eliot gets one of those phone cases that goes on a belt or lanyard, and carries her that way. eliot has no right to laugh at the sling alec uses for jack once he warms up to being held.

the three of them freak leverage international newbies the fuck out who are like.... dear god if we join is there just daemon socialist anarchy???! and the answer is no but also technically kinda yes? everyone thinks hazel is parker's, t'pris is eliots, and jack is alecs.

it takes two years post s5 for the ot3 to get together despite them and their daemons being all over each other. they are awful and so very stupid.

t'pris likes to tease hazel about how eastern red moths' diet mainly consists of moths. hazel just pointedly flaps her wings and says GODDAMN. TRY. ME. t'pris does not try hazel.

eventually hazel and eliot make up, but it's probably telling of me that i am not sure how. eliot in the meantime is extremely deferential to her, and basically this verse is a love story between them two (aka, eliot and his soul) wherein (as @redgoldblue described) "eliot finds himself in his new family (as very explicitly pointed out in the two horse job) but he hasn’t FOUND himself yet it’s a process so his daemon… who also, separately, finds a home in the same family before ever coming back to eliot"

since the two fliers of the group have bodies about three inches long, jack loves using his weird lil hands to double fist his daemon partners' fuzzy lil bodies. 

[antiloreolympus]

10 Anti LO Asks

1. Absolutely wild Rachel thinks it makes sense Rhea wouldn’t be the single named parent to the sisters/“friends” while Kronos is the single named parent to the brothers as if Rhea isn’t literally an anagram for Hera, her ancient art isnt modeled to look like Hestia, and that she shares divine mother/fertility status with Demeter. Like cmon, giving Hades an Oedipus complex is not worth it when the more obvious connections is right there and would actually get rid of the weird explicit incest and overtones she was desperately trying to get rid of but (accidentally?) made so much worse.

2. yall gotta realize the extent of rachel's "research' is purely a 30 second glance at google and thats it. thats why hephaestus has runner blades instead of actual prosthetics, it's why ares' military uniform isnt correct, it's why she puts in french aesthetics despite the country not even existing yet, its why sicily is framed as more important and the actual birthplace of these gods than actual greece, and the list goes on and on. rachel doesnt care about being remotely accurate and never has.

3. im confused because wasnt it a point persephone was uncomfortable with hades being hyper violent especially over her? yet this whole trial has been him going overboard in being a violet prat to literally everyone especially when its not warranted. tho for all we know rachel either forgot the part of persephone being uncomfortable with it or thinks everyone else forgot and shes reimplementing it bc she thinks its hot. anyway name a more iconic duo than LO and inconsistency over everything.

4. I don' care if the readers are young and don't know any better, literally no one with more than two brain cells would ever be cool and even approve of Persephone, only a week into being 20, would throw away her entire life, friends, and family (and possibly even her own powers if she eats the Pom) for some guy she's only known a most a month who doesn't respect her wants and obsesses over her body. Demeter is literally the only sane person in this sorry and she's the bad guy? Seriously?

5. tbh if you're 2000+ years old, are super rich, framed as the most desirable and power and sexy, and are a literal KING and you still couldnt find a wife or even a true relationship in all that time maybe the problem is you, buddy, not that everyone else isnt good enough or you haven't found an impressionable teenager to fawn over you.

6. Yeah Thanatos constantly flinching and being frightened of hades considering that was his caretaker has some rather bad implications to what hades was actually like off screen to this kid (and he was terrible on screen).

7. This comic's writing is my getting worse because Apollo read it and was so offended at his portrayal that he cursed Rachel and her writing forever.

8. im honestly shocked rachel would go with the "hera made hephaestus herself" version bc its so overwhelming ableist AND misogynistic because it says hera isnt good enough on her own and thats why hephaestus isnt "right" like everyone else, especially against athena. idk i think it would have been nicer if he was zeus and hera's kid together and it'd be a sweeter story of them loving him and sticking up against people who doubt and bully him, but god forbid this fanfic depict them positively 😑

9. to add on the "perfect looks" anon, even ancient greeks didnt depict the gods all the same? like hera and demeter were depicted as more matronly, aphrodite was more curvy, artemis was more skinny, athena muscular, etc. even the guys werent all the same (apollo, eros, and dionysus looked more effeminate, hermes looked more like a teen, hephaestus was more muscular, etc) so the idea rachel is "clever" for having everyone look the same is wrong and just badly excusing her for being a lazy artist.

-----FP Spoilers/Mention-----

10. FP// Sorry but the only god the mortals feared was Hades and for very obvious reasons, but even then they didn't see him as a monster. Literally every other god, including Pan who is a major weirdo, was well loved and respected. I think Hades is just projecting his own insecurities onto everyone else when they clearly don't have the same issue. Plus in this he's so violent and cruel and literally enslaves the dead, why wouldn't the mortals see him as a monster? Get a hint, idiot.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Hey! Would it be okay if you wrote yandere headcanons for Jafar, Captain Hook, Ratcliffe, and Maleficent? Thank you!

No problem! ^^ Sorry for the wait! Ratcliffe posed a challenge, but I'm so happy to get a request about him and his and Mal's turned out my favourites- I hope you like them too!

~~~

Captain Hook:

Hook has no problema’s with kidnapping people in the first place; He’s done it twice (More?? I remember twice off the top of my head) already, and you being in the real world would be absolutely no issue because he’s done that before too (Jane). So, he’s definitely going to take you when he’s yandere for you.

He’s not violent with you, but he is cruel. Ties you up and keeps you in the belly of the ship, with all the supplies and stuff. Not even his crew are allowed to sleep down there, safe from the elements. Just you. Occasionally someone other than your kidnapper comes down to get food / other supplies or to bring you food (Its always Smee, as he is the one Hook trusts the most) and you ‘enjoy’ your only human contact with someone apart from Hook, someone other then the one person you’re exposed to every single day, who you hate.

He also likes to keep you gagged though sometimes if he remembers, so their will likely be no talking between you and Smee.

And don’t doubt Hook’s strength against you. I don’t know how, you don’t know how, no one knows how, but Captain Hook is freakishly strong. I’ll let your mind run wild with that knowledge, of Hook’s physical strength…

And don’t start thinking you get a break where the heroes of this movie are involved! As soon as Peter finds out about you, you’re in for even more pain. He see’s that you’re important to Hook, so of course he’s going to target you a lot. Really, this is just not a nice situation to be in. You get no rest.

Hook is also devious and cunning, so he’s very kind and lovely to you (Apart from kidnapping, tying you up, gagging and keeping you hostage from sunlight and freedom of course). Treats you so well. Gives you pet names, comforts you when you’re despairing, gives you the best of the food they have, etc. This is all in order to make you love him, so if you ever get the chance to escape, you’ll be fucked up in the mind and heart and you won’t know what to do; Leave, or stay?

Governor Ratcliffe:

Ratcliffe is a cruel, selfish man but… he doesn’t really do anything on his own? He persuades and manipulates people with his words (And SONG!), but he doesn’t even dig for his own gold, my man. So, this may be a slow burn kind of deal.

If you’re one of the natives in a land he’s ‘exploring’, he will most definitely take you back to England and integrate you into European society- whether you like it or not (Most likely not). It’s like what John Rolfe tried to do with Pocahontas, except she was willing. It was her idea to go. You, did not get a choice.

If you’re an British person living in England (Whether you’re a courtier, noble, middle class or servant), then he doesn’t keep you hostage because he’s always out on exhibitions and he doesn’t want his precious to die in his home from starvation while he’s away. Its not like he can ask a neighbour to come by and feed his prisoner every day!

But he does make it clear to you that while he’s gone, if you so much as look at another man then he will find out, and they will disappear the next day. You assume he has spies, but really he just wants you to think that. But he’s so scary and straight faced and stern, that you believe him 100 percent. You unconditionally believe that this powerful (Much more powerful then you), influential, intimidating man who clearly has an unhealthy obsession with you, has spies watching you the whole time he’s away.

Its worse though when he is home in England, and he is the one watching you. His gaze feels like gristle and you’re afraid and get a sick taste in your mouth every time you’re alone because he will follow you and you’re afraid he’ll come.

He manipulates people into thinking you two are a couple.

In other words: He operates in plain sight. He is showing his feelings for you and possessiveness over you in plain sight… so it’d be very, very hard for you to escape.

Jafar:

Never. Stops. Cornering you alone. It’s like he has some kind of ‘Y/N senses’ that alert him when you’re alone in the palace and he’ll come a running.

It’s very creepy and very dangerous, with him. And, I don’t want to say you should carry around a weapon… but… have a get-away strategy, at least. Our man’s a creeper. I mean, usually not quite as bad as Frollo, but that’s just because he has other priorities like power and revenge in the movies, but as he is yandere here… you are his number 1 priority.

Jafar is different o other Yanderes in that he genuinly enjoys scaring you. This isnt all just an elaborate scheme to have you for himself and all that, no. Although that is part of it. He also just loooooves messing with you in this way.

For a while you’re pretty safe, because he gets such a kick out of turning up around you and creeping you out a bit with off compliments that are a little bit too vulgar for public and a decibel too loud and lightly touching you so spiders creep up your spine. Not in any inappropriate spots, not that that matters when you don’t want to be touched, but it’s not like he’s trying to cop a feel, you know? He just likes seeing you flustered and making sure you know that he could do whatever he liked, whenever he wants.

Eventually he’ll get bored of that though, because the more you talk to him or look at him, or respond at all to his presence, the more he wants you. To be around you, as often as possible.

And, more importantly, alone. He doesn’t like other people getting to be around you. That’s a gift for him, alone. He wants to be in a relationship with you in every sense of the word, but he wants it so you have a relationship with no one but him.

So, yeah… A sprinkle of kidnapping...

He will always like to see you a little scared of him every now and then. Throughout this whole ordeal, man, you will be on your toes.

Maleficent:

She starts out pretty nicely, actually! Just, after you meet, she starts visiting you every week and having lunches or teas with you and chatting! It’s nice! She’s smart, and clever, and surprisingly funny in that devious dark way that that makes you wonder how serious she actually is.

And as it turns out, surprising both of you actually (You more than her obviously, because she is the Mistress of All Evil. She’s just like ‘Oh’, and you’re like ‘Oh fuck’), she’s deadly serious.

Because one day, she’s leaving your forest cottage al happy with that nice, warm, gooey, lovely feeling in her chest and tiny foreign smile on her face and she looks back one last time as you close the door and get back to the rest of your life, and suddenly feels a horrible tightness in her chest. Begging her to go back to you and stay there. Like when you watch your parent drive off after leaving you at school and you have the sudden urge to call them back because now you’re stuck in this awful place.

Because, now everywhere is an awful place when you aren’t with her.

And this will not do.

Her very next visit is when things get turbulent, because she isn’t a procrastinator.

You have your tea and your bickies and your chat, and its wonderful- because like hell Mal’s gonna miss out on her chat with you! No, the stealing you can wait until after. But then, when it is over, she reveals her true intentions and your lovely friendship is destroyed. Now she is the evil villain who kidnapped you and won’t let you leave her scary castle.

She’s happy, though. And that’s what matters to her.

[la5t-res0rt]

Wanted to ask about beetlelyds, sorry, I thought it was technically cannon? Like in the old comics after the show ended she grew up and married him. Sorry I’m an old school fan and have no idea why this whole thing is such a big deal. Wasn’t the actor like 20 too? I’m sorry if I sound very dumb. I’m not used to this new tumblr.

youre fine you are one hundred percent allowed to especially when you do it civilly as you have done here

first of all the biggest issue faced in the whole what is and is not canon debate is the fact that there are three (four if you count the limited comics run) publicized iterations of my media

i will go over each very briefly just kidding this is going to a long answer so i will spare the dashboard with a readmore

there is the movie which im sure you dont need me to explain the plot since youre an old school fan but basically the climax is that yes beetlejuice does go for the marriage angle in exchange for stopping the exorcism of adam and barbara and his motive for this is so that he can cause as much chaos as he wants on the mortal coil but his plan is thwarted when barbara rides a sandworm into the house which promptly eats beetlejuice sending him to bureaucratic death limbo

the end of the movie features the deetz and the maitlands happily living together with lydia havign a new appreciation for her situation and beetlejuice gets his head made real small which is very funny haha 

so no in the movie they are not canon editors note the actress who played lydia winona ryder was a teenager while filming the movie she turned 17 the year it released 

the next is the cartoon which i will admit has the most grounds for being considered canon but in the end the show is about a middle schooler and her best friend who is a ghost which in itself is a pretty iffy gray area sort of thing but for a childrens cartoon to work a friendship is better than the obvious enemy status they held in the movie

anyway in the cartoon they are potrayed to be very close friends with lydia being the person beetlejuice cares about the most and honestly if you were to watch it with no prior knowledge of the media and if you ignored their massive and obvious age difference than yeah you probably would read it as a romantic relationship 

however lydia is a middle schooler and that is simply immoral

there have been writers for the cartoon who have been credited to say that a relationship is what they were trying to invoke but for obvious reasons they couldnt exactly move forward with that angle with them establishing that lydia is a child in middle school and a fully grown adult man dating a child who is in middle school is immoral and also illegal in the united states and in canada 

this isnt a good argument for whether or not something is canon and i will tell you why with one simple name and that is luke weber

if you dont know who luke weber is he was a storyboard artist on the cartoon steven universe he is known for making a lot of self ship artwork of him and the character pearl

he worked on the show isnt his material canon no of course it isnt it wasnt put in the actual publication and also if memory serves he was eventually asked to leave the project after he drew art of the shows creator giving him permission to date pearl and calling them her otp and a lot of fans hated this because the most generally accepted interpretation of pearls character is that she is sapphic so a lot of people took issue however that again is just a widely perceived headcanon it is never stated what her actual sexuality is no one in that show is because it isnt a show about that its about wait im getting off topic sorry

what im saying is what can truly be considered canon is what you see on the screen and with the cartoon they are definitely the most friendly with each other and that is why so many people in the beetlebabe shipping community take so much stock in the cartoon because it is the easiest to read the relationship between the mas romantic although that is not what the show actually provides in black and white terms

interpretation does not equal canon and in this case no matter what anyone says the fact remains that in the cartoon itself they are friends good friends yes but friends all the same

it is definitely not a show about a grown man grooming an adult and if it were you definitely shouldn’t be stanning it the extreme because grooming a minor is wrong and it is apparently a problem in the fandom

anyway if the cartoon and the movie are both products of their time and there was more leniency on content bear in mind this was the same era as notorious animation powerhouse and known predator john k who was a showrunner on ren and stimpy and he maintained a relationship with a teenager which was an open secret that nobody really took issue with because in that time being a woman in the animation industry was tricky business and your career could be ended easily if you rejected advances luckily time has moved forward and the animation industry although still full of problems of a similar nature at least people are getting called out and punished for it

you can look more into that yourself its really upsetting though

as for comics i havent been able to find good scans of them and im not willing to purchase them but in my search i never found anything about the two of them ever being married in the cartoon again because she is a child i did find a cover where he appears to be getting married and hes asking lydia to get him out of it but im not sure where the comic actually goes all i know is she is standing off to the side shrugging and looking like she doesnt really care

anyway that brings us to the musical which is set in the modern day 

in the original libretto lydia is described as thirteen but since they got an actress who was older in the updated librettos she is listed as 15 and the story is pretty similar to the movie the young girl befriends ghosts and they try to scare her family out etc etc

the major difference between the film and the musical are that lydia and beetlejuice are more like friends like in the cartoon 

she summons him to help scare after the maitlands attempt doesnt really work so he shows up and they have fun terrorizing people together however she drops him for the opportunity to perhaps get her mom back but when no one will help she goes back to beetlejuice who tricks her into almost exorcising barbara

she agrees to marry him in order to stop the exorcism and he only wants to get married so he can be alive again and cause problems on the mortal coil like in the movie in the musical he states several times its a green card thing whihc obviously doesnt make it okay but still

anyway lydia tricks him and runs off into the underworld before the wedding can happen blah blah blah she goes back blah blah and she agrees to go through with the wedding to save her friends and family with a plan to make him go away for good

theres a very tongue and cheek song called creepy old guy which points out how wrong the whole thing is but everyone is going along with it in a very comedic matter and it includes the line 

i cant believe some cultures think this kind of things alright

basically saying yeah this is very very wrong anyway they do get married and beeltjeuice is alive for like 6 seconds before lydia stabs him to death with bad art and he dies thus nullifying the marriage because death do you part etc

so in the musical no at the end of the show they are not canon because he is dead their marriage is nullified and they go their separate ways

anyway sorry about that i just need to make it very clear that these three properties are all very distinct from each other and basically all three are indeed canon since they are publicized material and arguing the validity of which one is pointless editors note all actresses who played with the exception of dana steingold were minors for the majority of their runs as lydia with sophia ann caruso the originator of the role turning 18 during the run and dana being in her late twenties presley ryan however was a minor the whole time and still is one

tldr no they aren’t canon but to the credit of some people in this fandom their interpretation isnt too far of a stretch thanks to the era and some of the writers wishing to imply a relationship between an adult and a child

i also need to address how this is all a big deal and i suggest you take a peak through my discourse tag and check out @leedia‘s blog to see some of the more harmful things done by beetlebabe shippers

the beetlejuice fandom is home to many minors after the musical came out since musical fandom is vast and the ages of its members varies and normalizing pedophilia is harmful to them not to mention the people who have been effected by sexual harassment at the hands of adults

both sides have victims of csa but one side continues to perpetuate the cycle by showing time and time again that this behavior is normal and easily romanticized in the name of coping and literally anyone who has ever been to a good and credible therapist could tell you that posting cp even if it is simulated cp isnt a really good way to cope and you can get mad at me for saying that its totally fine but and im going to remove my character veil here for just a second as a csa survivor myself i think its harmful to not only myself but many others ok the veil is back down

tldr again there is a lot of bullying and harassment going on with both sides having their own issues but there is one side whos issues run a bit deeper in my humble opinion 

thank you for your question it allowed me to talk a lot you are welcome to discuss further with me in dms if you wish i honestly recommend giving the musical a listen because it is very fun and despite what some people say its very clever and if you get a chance to see a boot of it its visually stunning

one last note that i couldnt really fit in here but a large portion of the beetlebabes shipping community ignore the musical because it openly condemns the idea of beeltejuice and lydia having a relationship and a lot of the antis take issue with much of the writing and characterizations of the cartoon just a note that i think is important since were talking about canon

[mrfutureboy]

@rovermcfly tysm for tagging me and sorry this took 5ever!!

why did you choose your url?

i wanted a bttf url last summer when i got back into the fandom, and i wanted it to be specific to marty bc i love him but i also want to be him. im like, obsessed with the nickname "future boy" that doc gives him in 1955, and the url futureboy is taken, so i am mrfutureboy bc i am marty (kinnie shit)

any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them

i literally only have a handful for url-saving purposes. @rhodeystark and @masloki are my most notable old urls so i wanted them for safe keeping. i also have @goodnightfutureboy bc that was one of the bttf urls i was considering and i never got around to deleting it (if by chance anyone wants that lmk)

how long have you been on tumblr?

I think i joined in 2010.

do you have a queue tag?

back when i blogged a lot on desktop, xkit worked for me, and i actually queued shit for my blog it was “since queue been gone” bc i thought i was clever. i still think its clever tbh i just dont really queue anymore

why did you start your blog in the first place?

Iirc, an irl friend of mine heard about tumblr thru an upperclassman she was friends with, so she was like “sonny we should sign up for tumblr!” and i was like sure why not. first url was miss-math bc thats my deviantart username

why did you choose your icon/pfp?

im obsessed w mjf but im also a kinnie /j. i specifically love his look in that interview and also i own a very similar sweater now so. it me. also im basically aromantic even tho i dont really use the label so yeah i put that behind his pretty face

why did you choose your header?

skfkdksk its because i kept fucking dying in the stuart little 2 gba game. I havent played in a while but im stuck on the level where stuart goes into the sink drain to retrieve the wedding ring that isnt even in there

what’s your post with the most notes?

Feel free to fact check me, but im 90% sure it’s a screenshot of gwen and trent from tdi that i took, where gwen is like leaning on the table all miserable and trents got his hand on her back, captioned “rb if you agree” bc i thought they were really cute. i still get fucking notifications for that post i think its at over 500 notes now

how many followers do you have?

i dont particularly like sharing this since this is the only site that doesnt make that public, and it’s nice to not feel intimidated or make other people feel intimidated or ashamed, like how it kinda makes you feel bad when you have fewer followers than your friends on insta. but i’ll play, and as of right now i have 1065 followers im very grateful for <3

how many people do you follow?

240. ik my ratio is bad i promise im not being an asshole abt it

have you made a shitpost?

Ive been on tumblr a long time. Of course i have

how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ post?

I get turned off by those posts a lot but i do be reblogging shit sometimes ill admit. but not blindly like i have to actually read it and care about it. But if its a 10 mile long post where everyones adding how necessary it is that its rb’d, forget about it

do you like tag games?

yeah!!! it just takes me a long time to finish them lol

do you like ask games?

I dont play them v often or receive them but i do!

which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

@chloezhao, period. also @jedflah and @lonepinetimeline were some of the big names within the bttf community that i kept seeing last summer and i remember being like “omg they followed me”. (Well. Actually with theo i didnt recognize his main blog so for an embarrassingly long time i didnt realize we were mutuals slfksk. he would like my personal posts and i was like “wait who is this” and i felt like a huge idiot when i realized it was him! our 1 yr friendaversary is coming up love u cowboy <4)

do you have a crush on a mutual?

no but @biathelstan and i are cowboy soulmates

Tagging: @biathelstan @thereisnosafetythistime @anakins-rattail @mahourobotto

[anne-white-star]

Jon pertwee x blind!reader

Notes : (Jon isnt maried) this played in 1975 a year after jon left doctor who. y/n lost her sight at a young age and enjoys to lissen to the navy lark and doctor who her father takes her to a convention to meet jon and both fall in love, reader is above 20 i try to make it as acurate as i can.

Words : 1119

Warnings: non

Also i try to make this the best i can im doing expiriments with wrighting so please excuse me if anything is wrong or not corect.

Y/n was sitting in her room just haning around, there wasn't mutch for her to do, you see y/n is blind and can't do mutch. But she enjoys listening to stuff especaly the navy lark and doctor who.

Y/n grabed one of the records she got from her dad on her birthday they were his first but hadend been used mutch. Y/n realy enjoyed the navy lark especaly petty oficer pertwee he was quite funny in her opinion. One day she asked her dad if mr pertwee played in anything ells

"Wel i know for a fact that he plays the doctor now i can put it on if you like" he had said

"Realy? Oh that would be wonderfull" and ever sinds that moment she Also became a doctor who fan.

And everytime y/n got some money from her grandparents or her birthday she would save it to be able to buy some figureens.

She had jo, the master, liz, sarah, benton yates, the brigadier, some aliens a TARDIS and bessie the only one missing was the doctor. But today was her birthday and her dad had a present for her.

"Happy 29th birthday y/n " her parents huged her

"Thank you" she hugged them back

"We have two presents for you one is here bur for the other one we have to travel"

"Alright" she waited

"Here we know how mutch you like and enjoy doctor who" her mom handed her a box that could open at the top

Y/n opend the box and felt around in it and grabed the said thing out of it "this doesn't feel like any of the figureens i already have" she rubbed her fingers over it to visuelise it "no wait is this a doctor figureen of mr pertwee" she gasped.

"It indeed is y/n We knew it was the only one missing from your colection" her dad said

"My goodness he's handsome" y/n blushed

Her dad laught "do you want to know your second present?"

"Yes please"

"Alright your second present is that we get to talk and meet jon pertwee in real life we made an arangement to meet him in private at the convention tomorow"

"No way really!? Thank you thank you" she jumped up And down and then huged her parents.

The next day y/n her dad and y/n herself were on their way to the convention "oh i can't wait im so nervous" she was smiling so brightly it could lit up a room

"We are almost there 15 more minuts" her dad said.15 minuts later they finaly arived at the destination

"Do i look a bit oke?"

"You always look good my dear don't worry" her dad took her arm and leaded her inside "excuse me sir but where is the room we wil meet jon pertwee? "

"Follow me" said a security guard. They followed him to a room "please wait here he will come in about 10 minuts"

"Alright thank you" they both dat down and waited, just like the guard said 10 minuts later jon walked in

"Ah so these are the people im suposed to meet " jon grabed y/n's dad his hand and shook it and did the same to y/n "please do sit down again" he smiled

"Its really a honor to meet you mr pertwee"

"Please call me jon but do tell me whats your name?"

"Y/n"

"Sutch a lovely name, do tell me y/n are you a big fan?"

"Wel as big as i can be with my disebilety"

"What do you mean?"

"Wel you see im blind, i lost my sight at a young age"

"Im so sorry to hear that"

"Its fine it was an acident no one could have done anything to stop it from happening"

"But if you can't see how do you Enjoy the show?"

"Wel you see i saved my money to be able to buy all the doctor figureens and i label them with a brail lable to be able to see wich character is wich"

"Thats extremly clever of you y/n"

"I like to use my imagination, i always try my best to find a way to be able to have fun even without my sight"

"I will be leaving you two alone" y/n her dad stood up "i'll be back in a hour"

"Alright"

"I understood that you also Enjoy the navy lark"

"Oh yes i really do i really need to use my imagination also because its a radio show but that really doesn't matter its fun to lissen to it makes me laugh everytime" y/n gigled

Jon laughed "Ah yes i also Enjoyed making the recordings it was quite fun to do with the cast"

"Jon i have a question and i hope its not strange but i was wondering if i may toutch your face just to see what you look like in real life, i don't know how acurate the figureen is that i got"

"Im fine with that y/n" he smiled softly at her, he grabed her hand and helpt her up then he put the chair before his and then he guided her to sit back down, he placed her hands on his face.

Y/n started to softly feel his face "I...i" y/n started to cry

"Oh whats wrong? "

"I never imagend i would get to meet you im just so Lucky" she softly cried

"Hey its alright don't cry now" jon huged her

"Jon i have fallen in love with your character and you i hope we will meet again after this"

"Im almost sure we wil" he huged her again

"Thank you for everything" y/n brought his hand to her face and placed it on her cheek.

"You are More than welcome"

"This quote always will stay with me jon Courage isn't just a matter of not being frightened, you know. It's being afraid and doing what you have to do, anyway.

I was really afraid to meet you but my point was proven that i could meet you and not be afraid i thank you from the bottom of my heart"

"Your welcome oh i was wondering if you would like to stay for a little longer mabey meet Patrick troughton the person who played the doctor before me and some companions of mine"

"That would be loveley"

"You get to wear my cloak at the pannel" he laught

"Realy? Oh thank you i always wanted to do that"

Jon grabed y/n her hand and helpt her up, he placed the cloak on her shoulders "come along my lady"

"Of course my dear sir"

And this would be the begining of a wonderfull relationship

The end

I hope you enjoyed reading 😊

[bloodstarved]

luca ✧

BASICS.

FULL  NAME : luca kalevi (formerly ra’luca oroh) NICKNAME : n/a AGE : 29 BIRTHDAY : 5/10 ETHNIC  GROUP : seeker miqo’te NATIONALITY : ilsabardian LANGUAGE / S : eorzean (fluent), thavnairian (passable), hingan (proficient) SEXUAL  ORIENTATION : bisexual RELATIONSHIP  STATUS : widowed HOME  TOWN / AREA : garlemald CURRENT  HOME : frequently bounces between ul’dah & kugane PROFESSION : former trophy wife, currently without purpose

PHYSICAL.

HAIR : deep brown EYES : blue FACE : high cheekbones; curved nose; eye makeup often smudged LIPS : full; bearing marks of frequent biting COMPLEXION : olive-toned; bags under eyes BLEMISHES : hands are slightly raw SCARS : prominent scars of varying types on back, thighs, & wrists/forearms TATTOOS : n/a HEIGHT : 5 fulms, 2 ilms WEIGHT : 140 ponzes BUILD : chubby; curvy; pear-shaped FEATURES : third “eye” on forehead: an elaborate tattoo whose “iris” seems to be some sort of aetherically-imbued stone; darkened hands/forearms; small, black dots under eyes; triangular, tufted ears; thick eyebrows ALLERGIES :  n/a USUAL  HAIR  STYLE : long, wavy hair often tied up or elaborately braided USUAL  FACE  LOOK : light makeup & contouring; heavy mascara; smudged eyeliner USUAL  CLOTHING : luca’s attire is always of fine, masterly-woven fabrics; that being said, she prefers forgoing pants the majority of the time

PSYCHOLOGY.

FEAR / S : death; being trapped ASPIRATION / S : to find happiness living on her own terms POSITIVE  TRAITS : compassionate, clever, & charitable NEGATIVE  TRAITS : tendency to go apeshit, fearful, & distrusting MAJOR ARCANA : the wheel of fortune ZODIAC : pisces, the fish TEMPERAMENT : phlegmatic SOUL  TYPE : the server ANIMAL : rabbit VICE HABIT / S : dermatophagia, among many other nervous tics FAITH : a devout follower of nald’thal, often seen in or around the ossuary, especially during religious ceremonies GHOSTS ? : yes AFTERLIFE ? : yes REINCARNATION ? : she certainly hopes not POLITICAL ALIGNMENT : privately pro-nanamo, publicly pro-monetarist EDUCATION  LEVEL : well-educated & highly intelligent; luca is proficient in both eorzean & hingan (speaking, reading, & writing) as well as able to understand passable thavnairian; she is versed in many varying subjects & is a competent, if not timid, conversationalist

FAMILY.

FATHER : ra’oroh nunh MOTHER : ra’miha zhio SIBLINGS : many, estranged EXTENDED  FAMILY : the ra tribe, estranged; the kalevi family, currently avoiding as much as possible

FAVORITES.

BOOK : various pseudo-scientific texts relating to the twelve DEITY : nald’thal HOLIDAY : none MONTH : february SEASON : winter PLACE : her small estate in shirogane, well away from the bustle & intrigue of ul’dah WEATHER : sunny & chilly SOUND / S : a murmured prayer & a softly-sung lullaby SCENT / S : fresh linen & sweet vanilla TASTE / S : copper & rolanberry FEEL / S : fine silks & sharp bone NUMBER : 4 COLORS : sky blue & occasionally warmer tones

EXTRA.

TALENTS : singing, dancing, calligraphy, harp-playing, tea-serving, etc. BAD  AT : asserting herself, expressing any negative emotion whatsoever, not going apeshit TURN  ONS : who even knows TURN  OFFS : pretty much everything HOBBIES : reading, writing poetry, & sleeping QUOTE : “I’m sorry.”

MUN QUESTIONS.

Q1 : If you could write your character your way in their own movie,  what would it be called,  what style would it be filmed in, and what would it be about? A1 : gone girl already exists, my guy

Q2 :  What would their soundtrack/score sound like? A2 :  something sad yet ominous, with a fast-paced, anxiety-inducing part in the middle

Q3 :  Why did you start writing this character? A3 :  tbh i’m kind of insane and i HATE having an uneven number of male/female characters, so that’s what started it. i dug around in my bottomless bag of designs, yoinked one out, and voila--luca was born. i had some help from friends fleshing out her personality; ultimately, i wanted to try playing a morally ambiguous character who ISNT super confident/charismatic

Q4 :   What first attracted you to this character? A4 :  she’s an anxious mess who bottles up her feelings until she can’t take it anymore and goes totally apeshit. rinse & repeat. we LOVE a feral woman.

Q5 :  Describe the biggest thing you dislike about your muse. A5 :  i don’t dislike this, per se, but her biggest flaw is definitely her shitty communication skills (in terms of conveying her true feelings/thoughts)

Q6 :  What do you have in common with your muse? A6 :  i, too, am an anxious mess who cannot stop biting the skin off their fingers & lips. that’s life, babey!

Q7 :  How does your muse feel about you? A7 :  idk dude it’s like 12am don’t make me think

Q8 :  What characters does your muse have interesting interactions with? A8 :  probably pushy characters with a tendency to (intentionally or unintentionally) step all over others. that would trigger her Apeshittery, which is always fun.

Q9 :  What gives you inspiration to write your muse? A9 :  mrs amy dunne herself from gone girl, ava from ex machina, clarice from silence of the lambs, & daisy from the great gatsby (im so sorry)

Q10 :  How long did this take you to complete? A10 :  :(

[voidsfanficfortress]

Snowed In In Your Heart

It was snowing,dead silence,not even a machine making noise, however, inside a little cabin, life dwelled inside, smaller machines were making a pillowfort, as a human made a warm drink.

The Fire cracked slightly, the flame moving as if it was dancing.Slow feet drag themselves along the livingroom, and sit in the couch-like furniture, the girl takes a sip, watching the fireplace as the warmth of it hits her skin,a sigh of relief comes out and the machines around her purr, its a calm evening in the banuk territory.

The girl was an engenieer, she liked to tinker with machines , making them, even, and the ones she created, were docile, and calm, usually helping around the house, and going with her on patrol.

The area she lived had a lot of Rivers and ponds,frozen by now,and it was a shortcut to The Cut, and the main place of Aratak's werak, her job is to take care of the area, make sure no-one suspicious entered and help lost wanderers.

But now, nothing comes up on the radar she installed around the thin Ice ponds, no heat signal on any screen, finally she could relax, sleep and maybe invent something...

But no..., SOMEBODY had to get lost in the middle of the forest.

The girl sighs, and grabs her thick furcoat, giving a last long sip to her drink, the wolves behind her make a mechanic whine and follow her , they place themselves on the reins in the mechanical sled and walk, pushing it behind them in case the person lost is injured.

Eventually they arrive where the scanner indicated, a tall and dark skinned Man rans towards her, trying not to freeze.

-Finally someone!- the Man says as he rubs his hands on his arms, trying to warm himself- we Need to get the fuck out before a blizzard comes-

'Not even a thank you, okay. Rude' the girl thinks,as she leads the Man to the sled, he sits and the wolves push foward ,she takes the wolves back to the cabin, with a bit of luck, her drink might still be warm

-What were you doing in there?, nobody uses that shortcut anymore-

-One, Id Like the name of my saviour, second, whatever I was doing there is non of your bussines-

The woman sighs and nodds, grabbing the drink.

-My name, Is Jericho, - she sits in the couch with an eyebrow raised- I guess you wont tell me your name either , since is none of my business..-

The Man sighs and sits near the fireplace, warming his body.

-My name, Is Sylens-he says looking at jericho- thought Aratak have already mentioned me-

-he is a Man who speaks few words,and besides- the banuk woman says- I live far from aratak's werak , but he pays me in metal shards and leftovers of machines he hunts, I dont care what he does , ill stay here in this area anyway, nobody disturbs me and im okay with it-

Sylens hums in agreement and looks at the wolf-like machines, one of them sits in his lap, and he cant help but pet them.

-You made them?- the Man asks

-Now see-jericho says with a smug smile on her face- I could say that Is none of your business ,BUT im a good person so I will answer your question- sylens rolls his eyes and his face contorns into a small smile- yes, I made them myself, I am both an engenieer and a tinkerer of sorts-

-Well...these are...just amazing, im impressed-

Jericho chuckles and drinks the last of her drink.

-Alright misterious stranger , I suspect the blizzard Will start anytime soon-she stands up, and locks the door of the cabin,she hears her companion chuckle under his breath- we Will probably get snowed in, since the snow here covers most of the entrance, and Judging from what I can see out the Window , its going to be a bad one-

'Are you serious?, I have to get trough the cut as soon as possible!' Sylens complains inside his head, but outside he nodds.

-So ill have to stay here until the blizzard stops, good, now,how much does a blizzard last around here-

Jericho bits her Lip,knowing that those types of storms can last a bit too long.

-Well...two to three weeks almost, maybe two and a half if youre lucky-

- you must be kidding!-sylens stands up, and looks at her- I got to get trough the cut in less than a week!, dont you have any type of gizmo that can help me get there faster?-

The banuk woman shakes her head.

-I too have bussines in the Cut but they Will have to wait, im sorry sylens..., you'll have to stay here until the storm goes away-The Man sighs.-luckily for you, I have a spare bed, come, over here-

They walk around the cabin, it goes into the mountain just behind it, and there is the spare room.

-Make yourself comfortable,if its too cold use one of the fur covers over there- she point at a couple of furs hanging- I havent figured how to install a fireplace here so, that Will have to do-

Sylens nodds and gets to unpack some of his stuff.

{...}

After dinner, both share a goodnight and they go to their beds.

In the night, sylens shifts and trashes around this bed.

Its too cold.

He sighs in defeat, dragging himself along the corridos of the house, arriving at the livingroom, where jericho was, the place was way warmer than his room, the fireplace illuminates the woman's features, a Pointy nose, thin lips and a few strands of dark chocolate hair , losely resting around her face.

He feels his cheeks getting warmer.

No, he couldnt be blushing, he never blushes.

Hell, he was sure he is allergic to human emotions!.

But he Will admit he misses the kindness of others, and Jericho had a lot of it, and not just that, she is sarcastic and funny, and really clever.

Just for once, he pushes that cold demeanor to the back of his head.

The woman shifts , facing the wall.Sylens goes and lays down Next to her, covering himself with the fur, still looking at the fireplace.

A lot of thoughts ran over in his mind.

What the hell is he doing laying down Next to her?.

He should be looking for a way to get trough the Cut as soon as possible!.

But living the moment doesnt feel extremely bad.

He never relaxes or takes a break, always on the run.

-Too cold back there?- a half-asleep voice says.

Sylens snaps out of it.

-if it makes you unconfortable ill leave right away--

A pair of arms hug him from behind, and a face rests in the crook of his neck.

-No no,stay, its okay,I dont mind-

He gets what shes trying to do, reduce heat loss but...his cheeks go absolutely red, thank god she cant see it.

His body scoots closer to jericho's chest, the warm of her body makes him quickly feel sleepy and tired, and before he closes his eyes he sees the both of them holding hands.

But he doesnt have time to complain, he's about to fall asleep.

And maybe it isnt such a Bad idea...

{...}

-void

[sirwolficus]

How dare you state you have a Sam and Max game idea and not share it? Please what is it? im very curious 👀

well buckle in fellas because its a long ride! i’ll put everything under the cut but heres a tl;dr picture before we get into it

well the picture says a lot; a common sam and max adventure in which they ensue a villain with a very powerful arsenal and not everything is fully explained or is even addressed within the plot.

its not 100% thought out, as most of my ideas are. but basically it starts out with mister commissioner giving our favourite two detectives a new mission; some woman has been kidnapped by an uber-crazy mother fucker and its the type of case that’s perfect for the boys!

and with every sam and max game, there is a bosco (well, there was one in hit the road and OBVIOUSLY one in the telltale games. i love that guy!) there is also an npc ally that’s sort of a mix between momma bosco from the telltale games and the geek from the show. no name yet but a sketch. actually, here’s a sketch below;

on the left, bosco; an absolute nutcase that hides his identity so that no one can tie his various illegal activities back to him.

middle is the smarty-pants; undertiminable age and gender. super smart and hasnt slept in many, many days. are those eyelashes or eyebags? no one will know!

and on the right, the originally kidnapped woman– which brings me to continue…

after some whacky hijinks of finding clues and talking to other people, you eventually track her down: tied up against a wall in a cell, with her own psychic power being drained from her as max and sam do who fucking knows what! once freed, it’s revealed she is a part of a long-lost civilization that has been in hiding for decades. they are the gatekeepers of the universe; in charge of keeping everything in line and in order. everything about them is very much kept under wraps– the knowledge that a small group of people are basically in control of all of space can very much bring alot of unwanted attention to them.

while trying to get her out to the safety of sewer tunnels that reek of shit, the main villainess of the game is shown. she’s the one who’s kidnapped the woman, and apparently doesn’t go down easy. she manages to slip away at the last moment, much to the anger of the kidnapped woman. apparently, they’ve tangled before– not face to face. with her pulling the strings in the shadows while growing despise for our two favourite freelance detectives.

however, the case isn’t solved. their perp is still on the loose, and sam and max aren’t basic bitches, yall! with the help of a new ally, they hit the road (reference intended)! smart fucker ally does some shit and gets them a new lead, with psychic now-not-kidnapped woman giving them tips and tricks.

everything seems to be going well until they actually seem to get to the height of the case; the confrontation. the villainess is a stone cold fucking bitch. sam and max enter the confrontation scene, ally(ies? undecided) waiting in hiding for if backup is needed. they come up on the other hostages and when sam goes to rescue, whoops, its actually a trap. he gets shocked (same voltage as a shock collar i’d think?) and whoops! dead hostages. yikes. 

“the only one i need is her!” villainess shouts while entrapping ally lady who has psychic powers because im a bitch.

she monologues to the two fucking furries about how much she fucking hates them. like a little bitch. GOD i want to marry her.

now, there is one fact about the freelance police i love: they are always together. villains never try to separate them, it’s always sam & max, never just sam. or max. and i love that. we’ve all seen what happens when they do get separated as well. sam turns edgy and desperate. max tears apart time and space just to get to his partner.

but what if a villain tried actually tried to separate them? to really try and make them suffer the one way they know how– creating their worst nightmare in real life.

so, our unnamed villainess because im on the creative thin line right now, uses our psychic ally to tear apart a hole in the fabric of reality and creates chaos throughout all of existence. and, well… you can see what happens.

enter our two main alternate detectives.

throughout the hub-bub of reality being torn apart, our four detectives are mixed up;

our max is stuck with another sam, and our sam is stuck with another max. throughout trying to track down our villain.

you get to jump through different worlds as comedy ensues. you can play as either sam OR max– thats right you can play as the fucking lagomorph psycho.

there are two different roads you can take to track down our villainess, with sam going down the much more clue-filled path where you have to be clever. max, however, goes down the violently-interrogating-everyone path. unsurprising.

sam and max both meet our villainess at around the same time. now since it’s dimension hopping, there’s… obviously gonna be more than one villain. now we’ve already established she isn’t above murdering people.

sam is a calm person. at this point in the game he’s pretty much figured out this max is not his max. he’ll come in and try to arrest her, and by arrest i mean letting max decimate her before turning her in and surprisingly not getting arrested for police brutality. basically the same thing happens with our max as well but much more violently. and, well…

she points the gun at sam. she threatens to kill him in a gruesome fashion. she hates him more than she does max.

here is a picture of what i think their office would look like to break up the chunks of text. this isnt a fucking fanfic. actually it sort of is but fuck it

for our sam, other max is extra.. protective. and trigger happy. so he tries to jump her. and, well, she isn’t dumb. max kind of.. gets shot in the face. yeah. im an angsty angsty motherfucker.

for our max, is almost the same. max gets ready to jump at her, and as she moves to shoot max and max moves to try and rip off as many of her limbs at once, sam moves to cover his little buddy. and, uh, well im predictable.

so… watching their best buddy (or atleast another version of them) getting murdered right in front of your face without being able to do anything about it? that shit messes you up.

villainess would probably make a quip about the situation before disappearing, throwing our sam and max to rot in a timeless void of a pocket dimension. enter cutscene.

now, throwback..! remember new bosco and the smart ass person? smart ass is a smart ass for a reason. bosco is fucking insane and surprisingly his theory on space physics rings true.

they open up a hole for sam and max to jump back in through. they are still separated at this point. now max is trying to track down villainess and try and restore all of space. oh! i should have mentioned. the rupture in dimensional travel and space is kind of destroying everything. anyway, max is now tearing through space in a fucked desoto trying to find the villainess and definitely trying to murder her. sam, being all of max’s moral compass and control, is now (in his mind) dead and he needs revenge. now while sam is tracking him (trying to find his own max! d’aw) they’re doing more bad than good to the fragile lifeforce of space. psychic ally astral projects and tells them both that they’re fuckin up and making a mistake. max tries to shoot her. sam pleas. shes strugglin to even speak with them but she’ll do her best.

badabing badaboom, max drives through a wall and finds villainess’ headquarters. sam quickly catches up and is like !!!! little buddy!!!! boom boom fight or whatever the fuck. heartfelt reunion! people are saved. but how will they fixed the fractured existence of the universe? bang scavenger hunt (im not sorry i fucking love searching for shit in games i dont know why) so that allies can make cool thing and fix universe.

boom. everything fixed. villain is like dead probably. thats my game idea i hope its not dumb

lemme know what yall think. i cant think of any cool name other than “Sam & Max; Freelance Police (The FanGame)”

i desperately want new sam and max content in this day and age.

[imagodwithnodess]

I need to rant because this is a problem

so i have noticed a pattern that pisses me off a little in fanfics. as a women or girl of color i find the amount of things written that are directed towards people of color is limited, especially in fandoms. You see these things in fanfic all the time:

y/n-your name

y/e/c- your eye color 

y/h/c- your hair color 

etc etc.

But you dont see thing like:

y/s/c- your skin color 

y/h/t- your hair texture 

not only do you not see these but you see things like “you turn a bright shade of red” or “your milky white skin” or even “your rosy cheeks”. or things like “he ran his hands through my long brown hair” some of us have short curly hair or are bald, or half long super curly hair, or anything else other than that.

this is all great because everybody should feel welcome, but it used to be very discouraging for me as a younger girl to see this, and you had to go search high and low for one fic that catered to your life. and when you did it made you sound ghetto or ratchet which caters to only a small portion of people of color. some may not see this as anything but as i grew older (this began to happened to friends as well) i couldn't even see myself in these stories because there was always something that made me think “this isnt made for me”. i have wanted ot make this post for a while but i always thought “know one cares, just suck it up and ignore the parts that dont match you” but thats not okay. 

What triggered this was a while ago i requested this scenario about a certain band member reacting to you being African American but not acting how they assumed you would (or something along those lines) and it got ignored. when i asked why it was ignored she responded to my ask with “i don't do things with physical attributes sorry” which is a fine rule i understood and continued to support her but as i followed her longer i found that that was a lie. she did things about weight, eye color, hight, and many more. this is not ok, there should be things out there that capture to people of every color. i shouldn't half to feel like i could never date men or women like this because “they would never date someone that looks like me” which is something i used to tell myself a lot. 

These things seem small but they are actually pretty important. there are so many young fans everywhere that deserve to feel like they have just as much of a chance as someone of a different skin tone. I have seen writers find clever ways around specifics about y/n in a story. simple replacement like “i bit my lip, as i always do when im nervous” to “i unknowingly began my nervous tick”. simple things like that can change the feel from “this isnt for me” to “i can relate”. 

If we can use y/n we can find ways for everyone to relate, especially if its not a request and you want people to relate to it. 

thank you for coming to my TED talk lol.

[garbagequeer]

hey hello im writing a piece for laptop ensemble that involves sampling and i need the most repressed/tender/yearning quotes you got. just as gay and heart wrenching as you can. but also no pressure I know youre a stranger on the web I just feel like you post that kind of stuff a lot thank you bye

hope this isnt like too late school keeps me busy :( (also can you put a read more on asks? guess i’ll find out). i ended up choosing many quotes from the same texts cause im indecisive as shit but i’ll bold my favorites from those in case that makes it easier for you!

anyways first of all you can never go wrong w richard siken as obvious as that is. these are both from you are jeff

You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you. And you feel like you’ve done something terrible, like robbed a liquor store, or swallowed pills, or shoveled yourself a grave in the dirt, and you’re tired. You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and you’re trying not to tell him that you love him, and you’re trying to choke down the feeling, and you’re trembling, but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you’ve discovered something you don’t even have a name for.

Let’s say you’ve swallowed a bad thing and now it’s got its hands inside you. This is the essence of love and failure. You see what I mean but you’re happy anyway, and that’s okay, it’s a love story 

this one’s from planet of love (the format got fucked bc tumblr is not actually a finctional website but :/ )

I have a megaphone and you play along,                                                                 because you want to die for love,                                                            you always have.     Imagine this:You’re pulling the car over. Somebody’s waiting.                      You’re going to die                                            in your best friend’s arms.             And you play along because it’s funny, because it’s written down,you’ve memorized it,

from litany in which certain things are crossed out 

I make you pancakes, I take you hunting, I talk to you as if you’re            really there.Are you there, sweetheart? Do you know me? Is this microphone live?                                                       Let me do it right for once,

sorry about the scene at the bottom of the stairwell                                    and how I ruined everything by saying it out loud.            Especially that, but I should have known.You see, I take the parts that I remember and stitch them back together            to make a creature that will do what I sayor love me back.

We were inside the train car when I started to cry. You were crying too,            smiling and crying in a way that made meeven more hysterical. You said I could have anything I wanted, but I                                                                                just couldn’t say it out loud.Actually, you said Love, for you,                             is larger than the usual romantic love. It’s like a religion. It’s                                                                                                 terrifying. No one                                                                        will ever want to sleep with you.

from snow and dirty rain

I had a dream about you. We were in the gold roomwhere everyone finally gets what they want.

that scene from when harry met sally where sally says:

One day I was taking Alice’s little girl fro the afternoon. I’d promised to take her to the circus, and we were in a cab playing “I spy” - you know, “I spy a lamppost”, “I spy a mailbox” - and she looked out the window and there was this man and this woman with two little kids, and the man had one of the kids on his shoulders, and Alice’s little girl said “I spy a family”, and I satrted crying, you know? I just started crying, and I went home

(like anyone else sometimes cries when u see a family doing something nice? is it because i want to participate in a sense of family of my own but have been excluded as a gay person from it’s portrayals and it makes me go :^( cause i dont feel there’s room for me there but i want there to be and i just have to long for this nuclear family heteronormative way of life that i’ve been made to believe is idylic? is it because my parents got divorced and my dad’s an ass and my mom is just a very angry lady and i want to re-do my own childhood? who knows. should we ban movies? yes we should!)

from maurice (ultimate source of tender)

“There was something better in life than this rubbish, if only he could get to it, love, nobility, big spaces where passion clasped peace, spaces no science could reach, but they existed for ever, full of woods some of them, and arched with majestic sky and a friend”

‘Did you ever dream you had a friend, Alec? Nothing else but just “my friend”, he trying to help you and you him. A friend’ he repeated, sentimental suddenly. ‘Someone to last your whole life and you his. I suppose such a thing can’t really happen outside sleep’

we are all so lucky i don’t actually own maurice in english this would just turn into me quoting the whole book

ee cummings voices to voices, lip to lip

the thing perhaps isto eat flowers and not to be afraid.

from virgina woolf’s letters to vita

7 september 1925

january 21 1926 vita writes

I am reduced to a thing that wants Virginia. I composed a beautiful letter to you in the sleepless nightmare hours of the night, and it has all gone: I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way. You, with all your un-dumb letters, would never write so elementary phrase as that; perhaps you wouldn’t even feel it. And yet I believe you’ll be sensible of a little gap. But you’d clothe it in so exquisite a phrase that it would lose a little of its reality. Whereas with me it is quite stark: I miss you even more than I could have believed; and I was prepared to miss you a good deal. So this letter is just really a squeal of pain. It is incredible how essential to me you have become. I suppose you are accustomed to people saying these things. Damn you, spoilt creature; I shan’t make you love me any the more by giving myself away like this—But oh my dear, I can’t be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don’t love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defences. And I don’t really resent it …

and on january 26 virginia writes back

Your letter from Trieste came this morning—But why do you think I don’t feel, or that I make phrases? ‘Lovely phrases’ you say which rob things of reality. Just the opposite. Always, always, always I try to say what I feel. Will you then believe that after you went last Tuesday—exactly a week ago—out I went into the slums of Bloomsbury, to find a barrel organ. But it did not make me cheerful … And ever since, nothing important has happened—Somehow its dull and damp. I have been dull; I have missed you. I do miss you. I shall miss you. And if you don’t believe it, you’re a longeared owl and ass. Lovely phrases? … 

from virginia’s diary, about vita on december 21 1925

I like her and being with her and the splendour–she shines in the grocer’s shop in Sevenoaks with a candle lit radiance, stalking on legs like beech trees, pink glowing, grape clustered, pearl hung.

from virginia woolf’s to the light house

What device for becoming, like waters poured into one jar, inextricably the same, one with the object one adored? Could the body achieve, or the mind, subtly mingling in the intricate passages of the brain? or the heart? Could loving, as people called it, make her and Mrs Ramsay one? for it was not knowledge but unity that she desired, not inscriptions on tablets, nothing that could be written in any language known to men, but intimacy itself, which is knowledge, she had thought, leaning her head on Mrs Ramsay’s knee. Nothing happened. Nothing! Nothing! as she leant her head against Mrs Ramsay’s knee. And yet, she knew knowledge and wisdom were stored up in Mrs Ramsay’s heart.

Love had a thousand shapes. There might be lovers whose gift it was to choose out the elements of things and place them together and so, giving them a wholeness not theirs in life, make of some scene, or meeting of people (all now gone and separate), one of those globed compacted things over which thought lingers, and love plays.

there forced themselves upon her other things, her own inadequacy, her insignificance, keeping house for her father off the Brompton Road, and had much ado to control her impulse to fling herself (thank Heaven she had always resisted so far) at Mrs Ramsay’s knee and say to her—but what could one say to her? “I’m in love with you?” No, that was not true. “I’m in love with this all,” waving her hand at the hedge, at the house, at the children. It was absurd, it was impossible 

(fun fact: the spanish translation adds something that i’d translate as “one could not say what one meant / what one wanted to say”, which i really like and i was disapointed to find out isnt on the english edition)

It was love, she thought, pretending to move her canvas, distilled and filtered; love that never attempted to clutch its object; but, like the love which mathematicians bear their symbols, or poets their phrases, was meant to be spread over the world and become part of the human gain. So it was indeed. The world by all means should have shared it  

from the great gatsby

I didn’t want to go to the city. I wasn’t worth a decent stroke of work but it was more than that—I didn’t want to leave Gatsby. I missed that train, and then another, before I could get myself away (…) Just before I reached the hedge I remembered something and turned around. ‘They’re a rotten crowd,’ I shouted across the lawn. ‘You’re worth the whole damn bunch put together.’ I’ve always been glad I said that. It was the only compliment I ever gave him

from kafka’s diaries

may 27 1911: Today is your birthday, but I am not even sending you the usual book, for it would be only pretence; at bottom I am after all not in position to give you a book. I am writing only because it is so necessary for me today to be near you for a moment

parts from a from a letter he wrote to oskar pollak on february 4 1902

When we talk together the words are hard; we tread over them as if they were rough pavement. The most delicate things acquire awkward feet and we can’t help it. We’re almost in each other’s way; I bump into you and you - I don’t dare and you. When we come to things that are not exactly cobblestones or the Kunstwart, we suddenly see that we are in masquerade, acting with angular faces (especially me, I admit), and then we become sad and bored. Does anyone make you as bored as I do?

then I fall silent and you fall silent and you become bored, and I become bored and it’s all like a stupid hangover and there’s no use lifting a hand. But neither wants to say this to the other, out of shame or fear or - You see, we are afraid of each other, or I am.

Of course I understand it. It’s boring to stand for years in front of an ugly wall and it just won’t crumble away. Of course, but the wall is afraid for itself, fro the garden (if there is one), and you get out of sorts, yawn, have headaches, don’t know where to turn

You often talk with her, not only for the sake of talking. You walk around with her somewhere here or there, or in Roztok, and i sit at my desk at home. You talk with her, and in the middle of a sentence somebody jumps up and makes a bow. That is me with my untrimmed words and angular faces. That lasts only a moment, and then you go on talking. I sit at my desk at home and yawn. I’ve been trhough it already. Wouldn’t that separate us? Is that so strange? Are we enemies? I am very fond of you

from his leters to milena

Last night I dreamed about you. What happened in detail I can hardly remember, all I know is that we kept merging into one another. I was you, you were me. Finally you somehow caught fire.

jane wong. from clearing

We want to believe everything has meaning.Plums blossom over a power grid

and I am in love again. The shame of it.

from leslie harrison’s [sirens]

I’m not Penelope married to faith married to waitingbound in fine soft strands of silk dyed and stretchedin my world longing has teeth and fins has a tastefor blood longing is a room built entirely of knives

Lorde’s melodrama tour interlude

Don’t you wish you could go inside a heart, see the strings and atrium’s, everything beating and bleeding. It’s kind of funny, I spend almost every minute thinking about love. Being guided, and divided by love. But I’ve never seen it. It’s just a rumour, a comedown, an afterglow. I wanna see it, in colour. In the summer, I can almost picture it

from Andrea Long Chu’s on liking women

One day, you tell yourself, it will give you what you want. Then, one day, it doesn’t. Now it dawns on you that your object will probably never give you what you want. But this is not what’s disappointing, not really. What’s disappointing is what happens next: nothing. You keep your object. You continue to follow it around, stash it in a drawer, water it, tweet at it. It still doesn’t give you what you want—but you knew that. You have had another realization: not getting what you want has very little to do with wanting it. Knowing better usually doesn’t make it better. You don’t want something because wanting it will lead to getting it. You want it because you want it

ada limón, In a Mexican Restaurant I Recall How Much You Upset Me

But love is impossible and it goes ondespite the impossible. You’re the muscleI cut from the bone and still the boneremembers, still it wants (so much, it wants)the flesh back, the real thing,if only to rail against it, if onlyto argue and fight, if only to missa solve-able absence.

i dont think i need to get into mitski songs because you probably already know but basically pink in the night/come into the water/once more to see you/in happy when she says if you’re going take the train so i can hear it rumble one last rumble/in i want you from the first verse to the first time she goes “i just need a quiet place where i can scream how i love you” (YES the card thing is very important)/the first verse of i will (w emphasis on everything you feel is good i f you wold only let you)/abbey/strawberry blond

sufjan steven’s futile devices obviously predatory wasp of the palisades you know the drill 

was going to find some twin fantasy lyrics but i started thinking about famous prophets (minds) and like. emotionally left my body so. i wont be thinking about it or any other songs anymore it makes me too crazy

from frances ha

It’s that thing when you’re with someone and you love them and they know it and they love you and you know it but it’s a party and you’re both talking to other people and you’re laughing and shining and you look across the room and catch each other’s eyes. But not because you’re possessive, or it’s precisely sexual, but because that is your person in this life and it’s funny and sad but only because this life will end and it’s this secret world that exists right there. In public. Unnoticed. That no one else knows about. It’s sort of like how they say that other dimensions exist all around us but we don’t have the ability to perceive them. That’s what I want out of a relationship. Or just life, I guess.

from ellen lee’s notes on twin fantasy that i revisit constantly

there’s no going back to deliver these words to the ones they were really meant for. That’s how heartbreak feels, I guess. It feels like your heart in between the teeth of someone who’s looking away. When you’ve lost your loved object, what happens to all the things you have to say to them? When they’re turned away, what happens to all the things that you couldn’t, but desperately need(ed) to, say to their face? He dissociates himself from his own romance until it becomes a fantasy. You have your bleeding heart, you have a finite set of memories — when nothing new enters and you’re unwilling to let go, then you have a fantasy. The loved object enters into you and transforms.

the journey home by dermot bolger(havent read this at all dont really plan to/dont know a thing about it either i just came across this shit like 2 years ago and i still think about it)

I wanted to hurt him; I wanted just to touch him. What I wanted I’m not really sure. If he had stopped and opened his arms I would have walked towards him; I would have sat on the kerb all night with him

adam b, sweet i have a (really gay) heart

i feel like my body is the extension of a lake. i feel really badabout not telling you the truth, sometimes. i feelreally small next to you. tall boys remind me of bean stalks.i wish i had your legs. i wish i could know your handsbefore i even touch them

aaaand i think that’s all i could think of and track down, hope this is actually helpful and not too long (i am indecisive no kidding). also ksjdfg it’s nice that you thought to ask me this and i did have fun going over all these quotes so thank you 💖💖💖

[heyyyharry]

{1/8} Sooo, I’m a fucking DUMBASS! This is gonna be a LONG “ask anon thing” sry! 😭 I read “In Another Life” so long ago and it’s still one of my fav all time reads, and I like reading completed books rather than unfinished bc I am so impatient that I could never handle waiting, I NEED to binge it through, so like I was waiting for the third part of flatmate to be finished since I already read part 1 and 2 long ago right when it got finished lmao

{2/8} (this probably doesn’t make any sense, I’m sorry😣) BUT bc I’m so into Halloween, & saw the Halloween special of part 3 was up, I couldn’t help but binge read and now I am impatient for the last 2 storylines within Part 3 (I’m so excited at the same time though!🥰) Imma be honest tho, I don’t read My Girl NOT BC IT ISNT GOOD, I’VE READ SOME BLURBS & THEYRE SO CUTE THAT I WANT TO READ but I’m gonna be a dumbass & instead of like Flatmates, wait until the LAST BOOK IS FINISHED TO BINGE READ

{3/8} THROUGH (idk why, I’m so weird like that!!! Sry!!!) but bc I’ve read some blurbs, I know a little bit of the characters from MG, like I have -heard- of Isaac (don’t really know who he is tho), I haven’t heard of Eddie yet (but I’m guessing by reactions that he’s a character in MG?) So when I caught up to the Halloween special, I’m assuming Eddie recognizes Harry but from MG?? And bc of THAT, I went back to the doctor visit chapter with Noah

{4/8} (GIRL, I was SHOOK that you brought the summer fling back from Book 1, NICE WORK!) that when Y/N mentioned the name Isaac (as I said before, I only HEARD of Isaac, I don’t completely know who this is, that’s why this reference flew over my head), I’m assuming that he took Y/N from MG, that’s why there was that reference? I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE LOL I KNOW IM A DUMBASS, BUT THERE’S A POINT IN THIS WHOLE ASK THING! I didn’t understand until I read the note at the end of the Halloween chapter

{4/8} (GIRL, I was SHOOK that you brought the summer fling back from Book 1, NICE WORK!) that when Y/N mentioned the name Isaac (as I said before, I only HEARD of Isaac, I don’t completely know who this is, that’s why this reference flew over my head), I’m assuming that he took Y/N from MG, that’s why there was that reference? I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE LOL I KNOW IM A DUMBASS, BUT THERE’S A POINT IN THIS WHOLE ASK THING! I didn’t understand until I read the note at the end of the Halloween chapter

{5/8} that I was like “wait wut😱” bc the name Aunt Lynn sounded familiar until I read the note 🤣 but continuing, I’m just wondering now...ARE ALL THESE BOOKS/SERIES CONNECTED OR SOMETHING? BC EVEN THO IDK WHO ISAAC IS, I CAUGHT THAT “in another life” line, & I was like WAIT, THERE IS A WHOLE ASS SERIES YOU WROTE CALLED IN ANOTHER LIFE!!! Then it got me thinking IAL is ALSO another reference bc Flatmate!Y/N deadass says the line “in another life” even tho she mentioned the name Isaac while

{6/8} thinking of baby names. and you know how IAL, Harry and Y/N’s past lives, they never got their happily ever after bc of the curse? And then Harry (Edward) finally stopped being a dumbass, found Y/N (Ann) in the present at the museum, and FINALLY got their happily ever after bc Harry/Edward found YN/Ann!!!! SO LIKE bc the curse was broken, and Flatmates and MG are gonna get a happy ending (even tho there’s SO MUCH ANGST IN THE MIDDLE, ugh my poor heart, but I love it! And love you! ❤️),

{7/8} is it bc since the curse from IAL is broken, there’s no more reincarnation but INSTEAD their doppelgängers Harry and Y/N from both Flatmate and MG do get their happy endings, is that why? (In my mind, reincarnation and doppelgängers are 2 diff things lol) but like all of this really leads back to IAL series?! THIS IS JUST A THEORY BC SINCE I BINGED PART 3, AND READ THE AUTHORS NOTE, I AM ACTUALLY SHAKING! YOU ARE SO CLEVER!!!!

{8/8} I’M SORRY THIS IS ALL OVER THE PLACE AND SUPER LONG WITH SO MANY QUESTIONS THAT I DONT EVEN KNOW THE MAIN QUESTION, BUT I HOPE I GOT MY POINT ACROSS! IM JUST A DUMBASS NOW REALIZING REFERENCES LOL😣, BUT I TRULY LOVE YOUR WRITINGS! 🥰❤️ Okay this is super long and I totally understand if you don’t even post thing ask, but just know you’re amazing, I love your work, and hope you have an amazing day!!! 😊

.

First of all, this is the longest ask I’ve ever received. Thank you for that.

To answer your questions, (you are NOT a dumbass, don’t call yourself that!), let’s talk about the Halloween chapter. When Y/N and the other Flatmate characters met the MG characters, it was on Halloween night. So when they came to the bookstore, Y/N expected to see the nice old lady who used to give her discounts when she was a student, but then she saw Eddie instead. A noticeable detail here was that Eddie told her the bookstore was a family business, meaning he had been working there for years, but why hadn’t they met before? It didn’t make sense.

Or did it?

It was Halloween night, so maybe it was the only night that the two alternate universes collided for a reason we couldn’t explain. And after that night, they would never see each other again unless something else happened.

But then in My Girl, Alice (the MC’s co-worker) said Layla was her cousin, this makes the point I made above invalid because Layla and the other Flatmate characters are real in this case and they are living in the same universe. The two Harrys and Nialls are just doupelgangers.

It really depends on how you prefer to believe. I wrote the crossover just for fun and to confuse you guys so it’s not very serious. But I love these theories so much 😍

About the In Another Life references, I LOVE what you said about how they broke the curse so they ended up together in every lifetime later on. This could be a connection between all the books and this could go so well with the first theory that Flatmate and MG were two parallel universes. Because they broke the curse in IAL, for every lifetime after, for every universes they were in, they always end up together no matter what.

This doesn’t really answer your questions because I don’t have the answers. The truth is just what you choose to believe in. 😉

[camillemontespan]

only for a moment [drake walker x mc]

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (her name is Camille in my choices game so she is called that in this short). 

Sypnosis: Drake is sitting alone in the ballroom watching Camille. After a conversation with Olivia, he finds himself alone with Camille and shots of whiskey. Things get emotional and... heated. 

Drake sat in the back of the room, closest to the door so he could make a quick escape. That had been his plan to begin with. He hated these events and yet, whenever she was in the room, he felt as if he was glued to his chair. He couldn’t leave. He couldn’t help himself. Somehow, his eyes kept finding her amongst the hundreds of guests currently in the ballroom. 

Camille was sat at a table near the front with Hana and Maxwell. From what Drake could see, Maxwell had made a joke which caused Hana to spit out her drink and as a result, Camille threw her head back and let out a throaty laugh that could be heard from around the room. Some of the nobles tittered and shook their heads. Drake rolled his eyes - let her laugh. Nobody else in court did. It was one of the things he loved about her. Drake sighed. He didn’t love her. He had to get that word out of his head.  Sighing, he brought the glass of whiskey he was nursing to his lips and took a long sip.  ‘Of course you are sat in the back,’ a voice said from above him. Looking up, he saw Olivia Nevrakis standing at his table. He groaned. ‘Olivia. To what do I owe the pleasure?’ She let out a hollow laugh and sat down on the chair beside him, a glass of champagne in her hand. ‘Ouch, a  thorny reception.’ Drake rolled his eyes and took another sip of whiskey.  ‘You are so obvious,’ Olivia said.  ‘Obvious about what?’ She ran a long finger along her champagne glass. ‘Her,’ she answered, tossing her head in Camille’s direction. Drake’s jaw clenched and he stared straight ahead. ‘Don’t know what you’re talking about.’  Olivia smiled like the Cheshire cat and reclined back in her chair, crossing her legs. ‘Camille has been here a month and your eyes  have been following her when she’s not looking. How cliche, the guy who is in love with his best friend’s girl-’ ‘She’s not his yet,’ Drake ground out. ‘The competition is still going. You’re still in the running to be Queen.’  ‘Ha!’ This time Olivia’s laugh was genuine.  ‘I may still be competing but I think we both know that Liam isn’t going to pick me. Liam loves Camille, you love Camille, everyone loves Camille but who does she love? Nobody dares to ask her that, do they?’ Drake’s eyes met Olivia’s. ‘What are you saying?’ She rolled her eyes and took a sip of champagne. ‘God, you’re dense. I’m saying that even though she is in the running, it’s clear that her heart may not exactly be in it. I know you both spend time together.’ ‘How do you know that?’ ‘I have my sources,’ she replied. ‘I like to think I had a hand in it.’ Drake frowned. ‘Excuse me?’ ‘That time at my lodge... in the snow... when I started antagonising you about your sister? You stormed out and she went after you?’ He stared at her. ‘You made sure she went after me?’ Olivia groaned. ‘You are so, so dense. I antagonised you for fun, though I was being serious, but I could see how much Camille kept looking at you when we were all together. Soooo... why not push you both together? I knew she wouldn’t be able to stand it while you ran away upset. Of course the two commoners feel an affinity for each other. I just needed a way to get her closer to you. Make her see there are other options out there that are not Liam. Quite clever, I say.’ Drake shook his head. ‘Or just twisted.’ Olivia shrugged, not caring. ‘You can’t say it didn’t work. You were both out there for a while. What were you doing? Cuddled up on the snow watching the stars?’ Drake’s face flamed.  ‘Oh. My. God,’ she stared at him, her mouth agape. ‘It was romantic! Oh Drake, you’re my new favourite person. Keep this going and Liam will be mine!’ Drake slammed his whiskey glass on the table.  He was aware that people who were in earshot were looking over but he didn’t care. ‘Don’t be so selfish, Olivia. Camille needs Liam, he can offer her so much and she would make a much better Queen than you!’  She glared at him. ‘But you would have her, I don’t see the problem.’ He sighed. ‘I have nothing to offer Camille. I wouldn’t want her to be shackled to me. All I’m good for is knowing where all the good dive bars are.’  He said this with such venom that Olivia drew back, her eyebrows raised. ‘Drake, I didn’t know-’ ‘Drake?’ Drake and Olivia looked up to find Camille at their table. Drake’s face paled. ‘Montespan! Uh.. what are you doing over here?’ She smiled warmly. ‘Checking to see if you wanted to join me for some shots at the bar?’ Olivia stood up, smoothing down her red dress. ‘That sounds disgusting so I’m going to help myself to more champagne.’ She walked away. ‘Well, Drake?’ Camille asked. He cleared his throat.. ‘Sure, let’s do shots.’ She grinned and slid her arm through his. 

The bar was outside in the empty courtyard and when they descended the steps, the cold air hit them. Drake noticed her bare arms were covered in goosebumps. ‘Hey, Montespan,’ he said. ‘Take my jacket.’ He shrugged off his suit jacket and placed it over her shoulders. She wrapped it tight around her and shot him a grateful smile. ‘Thanks, Drake.’ They sat down on the bar stools and ordered two shots of whiskey each. ‘And one more of good luck!’ Camille said to the barman who poured them another shot each.  ‘Three huh?’ Drake asked. ‘You trying to get drunk?’ She winked. ‘Maybe I’m trying to get you drunk.’ He let out a chuckle and raised his glass. ‘To good luck,’ he toasted. Camille grinned and clinked her glass against his. He watched her as she settled into the stool and looked around the courtyard. Her hands were placed inside his jacket pockets, keeping warm. ‘You’re watching me, Drake,’ she suddenly said, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. Drake looked down at the ground before looking at her again. ‘Can’t help it.’ She blushed. He took a swig of his next shot. ‘Come on, Montespan. Keep up with me.’  Camille giggled and took her next shot. She closed her eyes as the whiskey warmed her chest. ‘This is nice.’  ‘Yeah, it’s good whiskey,’ Drake replied.  ‘I meant this. Your company. It’s nice. I like our times together.’ ‘How so?’ Drake took his next shot out of nervousness. Whenever she got talking about how nice it was to hang out, he wanted to tell her how much he liked it too. How it was the one thing that helped him get through these courtly events. He was always nervous he would say too much.  Camille bit her lip. ‘I mean, court is nice and all but it feels too much sometimes. I always worry I’m going to say the wrong thing or choose the wrong fork- why are there so many forks, Drake?!’ She said this last part as she laughed and Drake laughed with her. ‘No idea, Montespan.’ ‘Just being out here with you... it’s more relaxed. I can be the real Camille, the Camille from New York. I don’t have to watch what I say or do when I’m with you... you just help me be myself.’ She had her last shot and Drake noticed her hand was shaking. ‘Camille, are you okay?’ She nodded but tears had sprung up in her eyes. ‘What if I don’t want this life? This life where I could be Queen? What if I just want a life where I can have shots and relax and be myself and be with who I want-’ She stopped, clenching her glass. Drake moved closer to her and took the glass away from her. Her hand caught his and held on.  ‘Camille, are you okay?’  She looked at him and smiled weakly. ‘Sorry Drake. Maybe three is my limit.’ Their gazes stayed locked on each other. ‘We should get you to bed then, you can sleep it off,’ Drake murmured.  ‘What if I don’t want to sleep?’ ‘It will help you get over the whiskey,’ he said, his eyes studying her, taking her in. She sighed and climbed down from her stool. Drake led her back into the palace to her room.  They reached her door and Camille took his suit jacket off her shoulders and gave it to him. ‘Thank you for keeping me warm,’ she said softly.  He smiled. ‘It was nothing.’ Again, their eyes were locked on each other. Camille moved to open the door and before he could stop himself, Drake grabbed her hand and pulled her to him. Their lips collided and Drake felt her heart hammering against his chest. She tasted of whiskey and her hair smelled of coconut shampoo.  Her hands gripped his shoulders and before he could tell her this was a bad idea, she pulled him into the room with her. When he pushed her up against the wardrobe and picked her up so her legs wrapped around his waist, he no longer cared. For this, he would give up everything.  He would steal any moment he could just to taste her and feel her and pretend she was his, if only for a moment. 

[beesmygod]

i watched “escape room” because it was going to be a bad movie and i was kinda right but it wasnt bad enough to go gawk at: a review

this one, to be clear

its january, so movie selection choices are pretty fucking dire right now but adam and i were committed to seeing this hot piece of garbage during our limited time together. what better way to bond than over a movie that’s pretty agonizing to sit through and not REALLY in a fun way. like, you could put this on to torture your friends and get mad at it but def don’t pay human currency for it.

escape room centers around the plight of six people seemingly randomly selected to participate in a one of a kind “escape room”. if you aren’t familiar with this concept its like flash games but real life: you try to get our of a locked room using clues. like a point and click adventure but you actually have to move around and do things and you have to pay a shit ton of money to do it. the protagonist, zoe, is a physics student who is going to the escape room to conquer her fears. but it turns out the rooms.....ARE DEADLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! really stupid premise already done to death by better/worse properties (the dreamcast game illbleed is the crown champion of this genre and out-stupids escape room in every single possible way).

THE PROBLEM 1: beside the fact that the premise, conceit and execution being terrible stupid, the movie is paced agonizingly. every room adventure lasts at least 10 minutes too long and turns what could have been a fast paced forgettable thriller into a 100 min slog that heh.....get this.....makes YOU want to....escape the room.

you are way more clever than these characters, even and ESPECIALLY the alleged genius physics girl, so watching them fumble with the incredibly simple clues is frustrating at best and will have you slumped in your chair begging for them to GET IT ALREADY. theres one room where the clue is “you’ll go down in history” and the answer was a 7 letter word. im pretty sure you got this one figured out folks.

THE PROBLEM 2: the “game” is unfair and doesnt make any sense. if you actually give a fuck about this movie and care about spoilers then i guess don’t read this but the conceit of the movie completely falls apart when its revealed that the escape room is just a things rich people use to watch people die in needlessly complex ways. the idea is that they like the concept of ordinary (altho in this case they specifically chose sole survivors of disasters as some kind of weird, nonsense control group to prove that luck isnt a factor in human survival or something) people struggling for their lives and this is a natural extension of that impulse. but most of the deaths were random and arbitrary and most of the rooms wouldnt work unless they were populated by the right number of people. but. they all easily could have died in the first room. some people just dies for no reason; one guy falls through the ice for no apparent reason. he didnt lose a puzzle, he just gets iced. no one else does. just him. because the plot was done with him.

ONE-LINERS: the funniest part of the movie was when one character said “sorry, i’m too busy having sex with ADULT WOMEN to play videogames” and a girl behind us in the audience audibly gasped from shock

SEQUEL HOOK: they set up a sequel where they’re going to hijack the protagonist’s plane and turn it into an escape room just to fuck with her. this command is given by a shadowy computer man with a modulated voice. who is the ultimate villain besides a character that looks like british george lucas.

ANAGRAMS: “wootan yu” a name that shows up 15 mins into the movie is an anagram for “no way out” and this is the ultimate puzzle, i guess. thats it. thats the final blow to the protagonist. Don’t Forget You’re Here Forever.

1/5 stars boring bad, i didn’t walk out of it, but i didnt like it and i dont want to see it again and disliked it enough to warn ppl about it. 

[thedistantstorm]

Phoenix Protocol 02

A Zavala x Female Guardian work.

Summary: When the Traveler’s Light was returned to the Guardians after the defeat of the Cabal, it did not manifest itself the same in everyone. Miyu, an Awoken Warlock, finds herself struggling with her abilities, her Light feeling different and not her own. With her Vanguard preoccupied with grief and all eyes turned to the Reef, she finds herself turning to an unlikely source in an attempt to rediscover her connection to the Light and define what it means for her as a Dawnblade.

[Previously]

Ikora always wants more.

By research, Ikora actually means to discuss Miyu stopping hers. Focusing on more important matters. The Reef. Uldren. Miyu wants nothing to do with any of it, and that is why she had willingly offered her services detaining escapees from the Prison of Elders despite not actually wanting to do that at all.

It gives Miyu time to actually complete some more secretive research on the side: why her Light is messed up. Why it feels like when she received hers back, after the war, it felt like it belonged to someone else, the person she used to be but wasn’t any more, coiling uneasily beneath her skin. She’s gone to Io. The Shard. Both under the guise of hunting escapees, but also to seek answers.

Neither place does and very day, the solar sword is more difficult to grasp, wings of flame beyond her reach. Telling her Vanguard that didn’t work. Ikora didn’t understand. The Void has always been at her fingertips, for as long as she’s been connected to the Traveler. With that in mind, Miyu attempts to adapt her argument, listens to Ikora insisting that she push herself and hopes that eventually either her own efforts or Ikora’s reasoning pays off.

Ikora still demands an answer, though. Wants Miyu to give her something. So, Miyu presents her personal thoughts. Based on her research, she finds that her connection to the Light is strongest while meditating or calling upon her abilities in the midst of a healing rift. Ikora is not impressed. Miyu isn’t expecting her to be. She tells Ikora the truth - that she does not believe offensive maneuvers are her true calling, not anymore. It’s something she’s believed for a while now. She can hear Ghost cheering her on in her mind for being honest - for expressing her opinion. That was rare. Miyu hated doing so, especially when she knew it was going to be an unpopular one.

Ikora, in response, cites battles, strikes, accolades. Ikora always measures a Warlock’s worth in accolades.

Miyu measures a person - Guardian, Human, Exo, Awoken, whatever - in terms of character. Heart. Sometimes she thinks that’s why she just doesn’t fit in with her more intellectual colleagues, aside from not being sneaky and clever like the Hidden or having half the honors or titles that Ikora’s top-tier Warlocks have. Put a sword in her hands and Miyu can cut down almost anyone or anything. But have her infiltrate a group and act a certain way, play a role of some sort? She’ll fail right away.

She is not an actress. She’s a Guardian. And to her knowledge, the definition of a Guardian is someone who protects. There has to be some merit in that, she’s told Ghost, and he - her best friend and most honest critic - agrees.

Ikora - Miyu thinks - must not think much of her. Still, the Void user pulls her back from her thoughts with praise. “Grey,” She says, “You are so much more than you give yourself credit for. You need to push yourself harder. Do not give up. I know you are better than this.”

It’s times like this that she wonders. Does Ikora know what her name is, really? Does Ikora even care? Miyu is beginning to think she’s just a faceless person, a puzzle that is challenging and therefore worth the more esteemed woman’s time. Ikora gave her hardly any face-time before the war, before she had these issues.

Regardless, the younger Warlock attempts to retain her composure. “Thank you. However, I would like to pursue my research on a more defensive Solar ability,” Miyu says, barely a whisper of defiance. “I believe it is possible.”

Ikora shakes her head. “Leave shielding for the Titans. A Warlock’s rift is not meant to protect. It is meant to heal or empower, and only briefly. Attempting to augment it is a waste of Light better spent on dispatching our enemies.”

Miyu sighs, but nods. “What would you have me do, then?”

The Warlock Vanguard crosses her arms, turns her back to Miyu and looks out at the City. “Take the most difficult Strikes and Patrols I can give you. Challenge yourself and you will find yourself calling upon your abilities more. If that does not help you to realign yourself with your Light,” She trails off, eyes narrowing on a fixed point beyond the horizon, “I will explore other paths. Your research is unnecessary at this time. If you require a project, I will send you to collect information from the Reef.”

The younger Warlock bows. “I understand,” Miyu says, schooling her features into something blank, and trying to sound collected and grateful, not detached and indifferent. “Thank you.”  This won’t help. She’s already tried this, Miyu thinks, but tries not to let it bleed into her demeanor.

“You’re welcome, Grey. You may go.”

Miyu turns her back to Ikora Rey, but waits until she is nearly to Banshee’s stall in the main portion of the Tower to let the frustration show on her face, a very quiet growl escaping her. Ghost appears at her side immediately. “I can’t believe she wouldn’t listen to you,” He says, sounding even more irritated than Miyu is. “I’m sorry,” He apologizes to her. “But I think you should keep working on it.”

“So do I.”

Ghost bobs, spinning around her in a wide circle of disbelief. “You do?”

“Yes.” Silver eyes cant over toward her Ghost’s single teal one. “I’ll do what she asks, and continue my research on my own. What else can I do?”

He sighs. “I know. I just wish it had gone differently.” He taps her cheek. “If you could have convinced her to watch you summon your-”

“We asked that the last two times and she refused. It’s okay, Ghost. I’m used to it being just you and me.” She reaches up to cup his small being with her hands, and holds him close. “Sometimes, I think it’s better that way.”

Ghost nuzzles against her abdomen in a return of their improvised hug, and wonders not for the first time if she considers leaving. He knows she doesn’t feel like she belongs here, that she’s trying so hard to fit into the roles dictated by social norms. Most of her fellow Guardians hurt her with their lack of understanding, their taunts. Most of them do not know how it feels to have their Light feel foreign to them. Still, she remains as gentle as she can, does her best to be kind to everyone she meets. It’s no wonder they don’t live within the confines of the Tower. The City folk are far kinder to his wayward Guardian than her own brothers and sisters. It’s a shame.

-/

Three days later, news hits the Tower. Cayde-6's killer has been eliminated. Almost everyone is celebrating. Miyu uses the general population's distraction to her advantage, slipping out to the training grounds recently restored near the base of the wall. There should be free space for her to experiment unseen, a rarity in the middle of the day.

She discards her gauntlets and lets the heavy, flame-retardant sleeves of her robes hang down over her palms. Pulls her sword from its sheath at her side. Ghost flutters around her, cones spinning silently in anticipation a safe distance away. She drops to her starting position, kicks off.

What she does not have in stealth or strength, she makes up with in skill. Some of it, Ghost believes, may have been written upon her from her first life, muscle memory and reflexes allowing her to pick up swordplay far more easily than ever anticipated. But not all of it. She worked hard to hone her skills, consulted archives and videos, took every ounce of criticism to heart.

He enjoys watching her dance throughout the training arena with her blade slashing out, parrying imaginary blows, each move fluid yet moving with unbelievable discipline and precision. However, he knows it will come soon. Can feel the tingle of Light, the increasing heat. She’s going to try without the rift. She always does, first. When her mind is clear, when she’s reached that place of blank-white concentration.

The Warlock sheaths her physical blade in a motion like lightning, before reaching out for the heat in the air, calling upon the Light in her soul to manifest the sword that answers the call of her heart. It always looks so effortless from afar.

It isn’t, though. He watches her throw the first one, scorching the dirt. Watches her call upon the second. Watches the flames spiral up her arm, paying no heed to her robes. Watches her grit her teeth and give form to the energy in her hand. This one doesn’t go as far, doesn’t track like the first.

The third fizzles into ash, blackens her fingertips. She screams, drops to her knees, slams her fists into the dirt. He doesn’t approach. He knows she wants to feel this, to commit it to memory - as if she hasn’t already, he thinks, but allows it to continue - and use it to fuel her. It’s how Ikora believes she will improve. Miyu doesn’t believe in it, but she tries anyway. He knows she’d try anything, to feel like herself again.

This is torture, but it’s therapeutic. She needs to let it out, to blaze, like the fiery powers locked inside her, refusing to come out the way they’re supposed to. The way they always had, before the Cabal had ripped them away by force.

Any changes in her personality, since the war, have been subtle. He notices the way her swordhand twitches after she lets the blades burn through her nerves. Can tell that where she might say ten words once, she now says six or five. Notices that where she’d try to be social once in a while, it takes a great deal of encouragement to convince her to approach a friendly face.

Ghost’s cones push out and then back in, spiraling around him in surprise as someone appears on his radar. Someone approaching, quickly. At a run. Miyu is pushing herself up, the rush of a healing rift spiraling out from beneath her. She doesn’t notice.

Another attempt is made to call upon the sword. She growls and braces her sword hand - gripping her left wrist with her right hand. Flames spit and spiral up both arms this time, fighting for purchase against the healing properties of the rift.

“Mi- Miyu?”

The small AI turns at the sound of the familiar voice. Oh, no.

Next