#[ after a literal year in prison ]

[7cfc00]

home is where the heart is (and yours is gone)

[arsenicflame]

i think the thing for me about edizzy is the potential of it all- we know they have history together, but we don't know what it is, how long it went on for, what it meant for them. there's endless possibilities there to explore, and any of them could be real! or not! but theres so much to explore with them and its so fun to imagine all the what-if's and could-have-beens of their relationship

[memento-morri-writes]

More dnd writing because it's all I have but I here's a snippet from a vignette I did of Rook's past (from Zara's POV), because Rook and his mentors never fails to make me sick (/pos).

[transcript under the cut]

Taking a coin out of her pocket, she rolled it across her knuckles, back and forth. It gave her hands something to do, and prevented the urge to bite her nails, something she hadn’t done in years. Ten minutes passed, then twenty. Zara began to pace as Rook’s breathing grew shakier and the color drained from his skin. Where the hells is Jay? she wondered. The room was so quiet that she could hear every tick of the small clock on her bedside table, and each one echoed in her head. How many ticks does he have left? She didn’t want to think about it.  She’d had crew members die before, of course. You don’t go as many years as a captain as she had and never lose a soul. But all the others who had died had died quickly, in combat. She’d mourned for all of them, even shed tears in private, but there was something different about watching the life drain out of a person right in front of your eyes.

[ssphiree]

not to dsmp post in the year 2025 but ive been sitting on this take for 4 years and i have to get it out of my system. i never joined the fandom online back then when it was all happening bc of how wild the community could be sometimes but ive been sitting on this for SO long n its been long enough i think

c!ranboo was one of my absolute favourites and i loved him SO much but heavily disagreed with one thing from him

on doomsday (one of the doomsdays bc there were like 3 or something) he had that moment where he ended up yelling at everyone over taking 'sides' and why they all had to be fighting & why couldnt we all just be neutral and peaceful instead of splitting into separate distinct opposing teams etc etc etc and i can almost kind of see how hed have a point - however there are issues with that standpoint SUCH AS -

lets look at the two sides: on one you have the strongest most skilled people decked out head to toe in the most absolute top of the chain gear - c!dream, c!techno & c!phil, whose aim is to absolutely and completely decimate l'manberg with their withers and obsidian bomb dispenser they have spanning across the entirety of the whole place

on the other side you have the people who have nothing. those were just kids trying to keep their homes, and they had nothing to fight with after the other side raided all their gear and got rid of it all. they fought tooth and nail to keep their homes time and time again with the odds stacked higher and higher against them each time

imo l'manberg had 3 main people involved that really contributed to its downfall, & only one was there on doomsday - c!dream. the other two were c!wilbur & c!schlatt. they were the big 3 involved in the l'manberg politics who were adults & not children following orders/defending themselves (which is why i dont include c!tommy/c!tubbo etc in that list). they were the corrupt power hungry quote unquote "politicians" (for lack of a better word) that projected all their issues onto everyone else and dragged them all into it

(if you squint you could technically include c!eret in that list, but imo in reality they were really only just another pawn for c!dreams big game of chess as a way to pitt the opposition against each other & gain power over them, c!eret never really had actual power/rule over anyone or anything they just lived in a castle and took c!dreams word for it. also they redeemed themselves and rejoined the freedom side anyway)

lets start with c!wilbur - he was very manipulative, he liked having control & he craved power but there wasnt really an opportunity for it, so he built the van and attempted to start a potion 'empire' by seizing control over a commonly used item (brewing stands) to gain leverage over the more powerful players. he dragged other vulnerable & generally powerless people (yknow, like children) into it & used them as his building blocks to the top. c!tommy is the biggest victim of this from him. once the potion empire thing stopped working out thats when he shifted the narrative to the freedom-fighting-rebellious nation we came to know l'manberg for. he sparked that (he sparked it & the others kept it alive because they really believed in it and really believed in him) and at first i think he to an extent genuinely did believe in it and really did want freedom for him and his people with little to no other conscious intentions, but the subconscious want for power was always there and bubbled to the surface as he spiralled really far into corruption in the pogtopia arc (what started as "a special place where men can go and emancipate the brutality and the tyranny of their rulers" became "IF I CANT HAVE L'MANBERG NO ONE CAN PHIL")

then c!dream - even from before l'manberg he was fighting c!tommy over his music discs, & i guess that just cemented c!tommy as the no1 enemy in his brain for the rest of time even though c!tommy was really just a loud kid trying to get by. he was also power hungry and wanted to keep all the power he had so he felt threatened by the formation of l'manberg. other less powerful people taking some level of control & separating themselves from him startled him, especially with c!tommy involved in the opposition. he knew he was the most powerful on the server & didnt want anyone else to forget that so he consistently used fear and force to remind the others how much stronger he was than them, the main victims being l'manberg and its citizens as they were the first and biggest group to rebel against him (and the group with c!tommy in it but thats neither here nor there). he struggled to accept the idea of people having some kind of autonomy to lead a life separate from the server he ruled over (he even said blatantly he would never think of l'manberg as free, only that he would let them delusionally believe they were free in his discussion with c!tommy)

and c!schlatt was just your run of the mill big bad in your face power hungry corrupt politician. he wasnt super manipulative or anything similar to the other two, he was just an evil dude that, again, was power hungry and corrupt like c!wilbur and c!dream. he dragged others into it by using c!quackity to gain leverage in the election via votes, and by keeping the citizens of l'manberg manberg under his crazy authoritarian control and he did that pretty much mostly out of enjoyment and greed. he liked that he intimidated the people around him and frequently used that to his advantage because it amused him

it was those 3 that created the us vs them dynamic & pitted everyone else against each other by creating 'sides' because they were the ones who wanted the power, and they were the ones who dragged everyone else into their conflicts. they were greedy and self centred and made that everyones problem

ones like c!techno & c!phil arent included in that list because they were never greedy for power over other people, they were just people who happened to be powerful. they mostly just kept to themselves in their little cottages but because of the perceived rivalry that was created by the Big 3 and then projected onto everyone else, they declared l'manberg to be the problem. even though c!schlatt and c!wilbur were out of the picture by that point, their actions had left the repuatation of l'manberg tainted from the perspective of those outwith the country itself, whereas the people left behind in it (like c!tommy & c!tubbo etc etc) just saw it as their home, just the place that they lived in and had built their lives. the others outside had grown to view l'manberg as the cause for all the servers problems because of the way it separated itself from the rest of the server and was another thing, and because of the actions of the corrupted leaders itd began with (and also - l'manberg was really the only place for people to fight for power over with the political system it had set up, no one really ever challenged c!dreams position of power over the rest of the server, only within l'manberg at least until that final disc battle)

it was very much a punch up vs punch down dynamic that people like c!techno and c!phil and even c!ranboo couldnt really see, because they all lived comfortably with powerful top of the chain gear far away from all the main conflict, and none of them were actually present for the beginnings of the conflict. none of them were present to witness the disc war or the formation of l'manberg, they were never there to hear c!dream tell c!tommy that hed never see them as free from him as c!tommy handed him the disc. they joined at the height of it all where the two "sides" were already very distinct and at war with each other

c!techno joined at the point of c!schlatt being in charge of l'manberg and at that point he was helping the underdogs because in that moment c!tommy and c!wilbur asked for his help and shared his goals - to overthrow a tyrannical corrupt government. then c!wilbur, knowing full well he was right about to blow up the country within the next few minutes, shoveled all the power and responsibility of the country over onto a kid (c!tommy, who then immediately handed it back to him & then he immediately handed it over to c!tubbo). by the time c!phil joined c!tubbo was already president (& had only been for like five minutes) and c!wilbur was in the midst of blowing up the country (note - c!wilbur had the presidency and had l'manberg under his rule again, he chose to hand it off to c!tubbo and then carry out his plan to blow it up while telling c!phil "if i cant have this no one can")

c!techno was never there to see the way l'manberg itself began as a challenge to a tyrannical rule (because although c!wilbur was manipulative and corrupt and power hungry, ultimately he did have a leg to stand on with his methods which is why it worked so well for him and why he was so easily able to paint that picture of oppression - the canvas was already sketched and lined) and continued to exist as a rebellion against an even worse system than itself. at that point c!wilbur was still seen as the 'good guy' who just wanted freedom for his nation from the tyrannical authoritarian rule of c!dream, so c!schlatt suddenly coming into power was a sharp left turn government wise, and c!techno just joined right at that sharp left turn moment where the big bad evil government had just came in and made some significant differences. differences not only in the economic system of l'manberg but also tainting the core values that once held the citizens of it so high and hopeful against corruption. so c!techno never saw that rebellious freedom fighting nation that l'manberg started off as and was supposed to always be, he only saw it as the nation with the corrupt government

c!phil was in a similar situation, he also never saw it as that rebellious freedom fighting nation and only saw the damage that the power hungry corrupt people had done to it. he joined right at the crucial moment and only saw the conflict and damage surrounding the country of l'manberg. because of this he ended up adopting the perception that the place itself was the problem if it was causing this many issues this severe. he failed to notice that after c!wilbur and c!schlatt were both out of the picture the problems between l'manberg specifically and the rest of the server were only being revived on c!dreams end, and c!tubbo as the new leader of l'manberg did not start conflicts (although the butchers army is a whooole other ballgame but thats not what this post is about - that was mainly spearheaded by c!quackity- who is again a whooooole other post)

if c!tommy hadnt declined the presidency then c!dream wouldve been slightly more justified in having a go at l'manberg as a whole for the whole burning-down-c!georges-house-thing, but ultimately it seemed more like he just wanted to flex his power over them even more. just as another reminder he could tear them down any moment he wanted to without a single second thought- he used it as A. another opportunity to keep the citizens of l'manberg fearful of him (almost like a kind of "remember whos really in charge here" type deal - again think back to he & c!tommys original negotiations of freedom in the og revolution) and B. another opportunity to punch down on c!tommy specifically (exile arc is another whooooole other post), he was given an inch and he took a mile. c!tommy explicitly stated that the reason he did not take the presidency was specifically so that any business/issues with c!dream would stay exclusively between him and c!dream without dragging the rest of l'manberg into it but c!dream ignored that entirely

c!ranboo joined right at that moment, of c!dream enforcing his power over l'manberg, but he saw c!tommy technically strike first with burning down c!georges house. he didnt see all the previous strikes c!dream had made on c!tommy & l'manberg. he just saw c!tommy make a move and then saw c!dream make a move back, therefore creating a back and forth rivalry dynamic which, in his eyes, could easily just cease if theyd stop pitting against each other and lived peacefully. he doesnt seem to notice just quite how corrupt and power hungry c!dream really is especially when it comes to c!tommy and l'manberg, he only notices different people teaming up to fight against each other & not a case of oppressed vs oppressor. c!ranboo, like c!phil and c!techno has never really had too much of an issue with getting a hold of good armour and weapons and equipment, and hasnt really had anyone like c!dream stand in his way to take everything from him the way everyone in l'manberg has. c!ranboo has had issues with c!dream and has been used by him (another whooooole separate post), but he seemed to focus slightly less on the 'c!dream using any tactic available to him to enforce his power on everyone' side of things and moreso the 'what is wrong with me i need to figure out why this is possible for him to do this to me' side of things

theyve all heard about all the wars and conflicts etc from before they all joined, but they struggled to fully really empathise and actually see it from the others perspectives. this is why c!ranboo was wrong in his view on 'taking sides' on doomsday

[spitedriven]

i've been a touch hesitant to make this post buuuut--

i think most shipping with lucanis is best done post-veilguard. truth be told, he's not in the right headspace during the game to really entertain the idea of a romantic partner. it's not that he doesn't want romance, nor that he wouldn't grow romantically fond of someone, but he is literally fresh out of a year in prison, has a spirit inside him that wants to break free and do maker knows what in the world, and his grandmother essentially dies as soon as he gets back. not to mention y'know. the fucking main plot of the game.

the man is, rightfully, fully preoccupied.

on top of that, he's demi. he wants to take a romance slow. he wants to build trust and familiarity. he wants to know his partner deeply. additionally, he's not exactly living a peaceful life, nor will he ever leave the crows. best case, he's going back to the crows as first talon and maybe a peaceful transition. worst, it's going to be struggle and infighting and everyone jumping on top of each other in power grabs while others are weak. especially on house dellamorte. and the first talon's new lover will absolutely be a target. he needs to know that his lover can protect themselves when he's not there.

and, truthfully, he needs his partner to understand that they will come second to leading the crows. lucanis takes responsibility very seriously. becoming first talon, becoming head of house dellamorte, those are massive responsibilities that he will not fail at. it will take nearly all his time and focus. his lover will not be his first priority (a very close second, for sure, but not everyone wants to play second fiddle to a job). he wants to take it slow to give them outs. to let them understand how things will go. he can compromise, to a degree, but being first talon comes before everything else.

and of course, spite is part of the package deal. he cannot be with someone who is uncomfortable around spite, and after veilguard, someone who is mean or insensitive to spite. lucanis has his hands full negotiating life with spite, and his lover needs to help with it, to a degree. that's not to say they need to bear the brunt of the burden, but lucanis needs help keeping spite from wandering away or understanding how much time has passed since spite took over.

he's got a lot on his plate still, after veilguard, and this isn't even touching the family aspect of it all with caterina and illario. which is all to say--lucanis might develop feelings, even strong feelings, during veilguard, but there's a lot of other things on his mind as well, and he doesn't want his potential lover to have to put up with his mess. he wants to feel like he can pull an equal weight. he doesn't want to trauma dump or have someone play therapist. he wants to put himself in order. and that takes time he doesn't have in veilguard.

the biggest change i'll say is that his romance scene, the night before the final battle, is less about sex and more about hand holding and quiet conversation and promises that if they make it through this, he wants more.

[fatewoven]

Determination became Spite because of Zara. As a spirit embodying the unwavering adherence to one's purpose, he was drawn to Lucanis' resolve to continue, to persevere, to always finish the work despite his very tangible desire to die. Determination found a kindred soul in the depths of the Ossuary, one unwilling to give in to the torture and grant their tormentors the satisfaction of success, and when forced to join, he, like Lucanis, wanted to spite her. And Spite he did by refusing to ruin his host's mind; he aided Lucanis by hiding away the worst of his memories. He was the voice that guided Lucanis through the worst days down there. Combined with the infamous endurance gained from Crow training, they survived (barely, barely, but Determination held them together and Spite kept him moving, kept him ready to kill Caliban at first opportunity) the prison until Rook came to the rescue. Spite thought finally they're free, but then he couldn't account for the ways trauma manifests in a mortal's mind, nor the time required to fully mend from an experience like that; experiences that churned up recollections from his cruel youth as well, forced to be useful or be dead. Things he refuses to face when given the news Catarina is dead. And Spite understand Lucanis needs more help. He needs to talk to people to work through the depression and PTSD, and that's why he demanded to talk to Rook. It's why he skims over other people's emotions and memories in a bid for Lucanis to understand them, to converse and share personal information. Spite isn't a malicious spirit, but it learned Lucanis only reacted to pain, loud and grating words, and throughout the beginning of the game there is this harsh dissonance between them where once was unity, one forced under extreme duress but a harmony between spirit and host regardless. Then, as time goes on, as Lucanis learns to listen to Spite more, they reach that equilibrium they had. Spite will be content, because he is a spirit of Determination willing to see this wonderful, stubborn, and kind host's life through to the end. Spite loves Lucanis, so very dearly, unconditionally, and the bond is most prominent when they're somewhere private because Lucanis is at least courteous enough not to have conversations in his head while talking to any of the companions.

[widowshill]

— Are you sure Burke wants to buy Collinwood? — Yes, he said so. I'm just afraid it's only the beginning of what he wants.

[chaotic-toby]

Idv rant time baby

When I first started playing the game, the first character I bought was Luca, and no matter how many other characters came out that I also fell in love with, I will forever love Luca. He is my favourite character in the entire game, and I personally, think he's a really good character (I might be biased).

Now, I know idv has meta characters and non meta characters, but in my honest opinion, all characters are good if used correctly and you have skill, I suppose. I don't believe in meta. I have never once played a character just bc they're meta.

Back when I first started playing idv, I always hear people saying that Luca was really good. He was a really good decoder and kiter bc he had no kiting debuffs like Tracy and Helena. But now, years later, I keep hearing people say that he's garbage and low tier. I try to not let that bother me bc everyone has their different opinion about the characters and I suppose my opinion on there being no meta essentially is not common, but it really does bother me a lot.

Call me chronically online or whatever, but I feel personally offended whenever someone calls Luca a garbage character. It doesn't help that I genuinely feel like I am him (I am mentally ill I know that) but he is not garbage.

Are there characters whose abilities make it easier to win? Yes. But you can win with any character as long as you know how to play them AND play the game. I am genuinely so sick of people calling characters awful and low tier just bc their abilities suck or whatever.

What's the fun in playing an "easy" character. In the end, even if you do play a meta character, you still need skill.

Tldr: Luca is meta bc I'm basically him and I say so (no one can change my mind)

[gingerbreadmonsters]

its so important to me that you know how much ive already cried over this wip and its literally only been two days

[aromanticasterisms]

actually. actually actually. with the knowledge that the traveler's sibling was used as a vessel for abyssal energy which then jumpstarted the cataclysm, i have to wonder if them being sealed by the sustainer first can now be interpreted in a new light?

[liatorii]

Soar throat, coughing fits, headaches and a possible inner ear infection is not the combo of pain I was expecting a week before going on vacation but here I am.

[datastate]

we need more cougar hunting lesbians in the world

[butchtwelfthdoctor]

there's a bit in the tardis wiki page for fifteen where it describes him as smth like 'free from the emotional baggage and deteriorating mental state of his predecessors' and its like. yup. things sure got Bad.

[apathyfairy]

some days you really just want to scream why is this so hard!!!!!! why is life so hard for me!!!!!!!!!!!!