#<- yes i am making a tag for this bc i’m apparently going to be process-blogging the whole thing at this rate

[tco-old]

Footage of my thoughts while I’m putting actual thought into the order of songs for a medley based on Bowuigi

EDIT: I’ve done the thing (and my thoughts have not changed).

[skazoo]

slow and blue and endless.

↳ kim taehyung x f!reader

someone stared at you through the window. you had always felt safe in your own home, shutting out the scary, real world. but a window is just glass, and glass… oh it breaks so, so easily.

length. 1.7k

genre. angst, yandere

warnings/tags. language, obsessive behavior, implied stalking, yandere themes, mind break, emotional manipulation, love bombing(?), mention of mental illnesses, physical violence, kinda gruesome allusion to murder, dark themes overall, minors advised to dni.

networks. none for this.

notes. [THIS IS A REPOST BC TUMBLR TAGS WON'T WORK AND I ALMOST CRIED<;3]

GAH these photos are so 80s serial killer making a creepy videotape that's gonna get edited in a true crime documentary coded...... i know you're seeing my vision, i KNOW it.... anywayyyyyy this is kinda not proofread, and i wrote it while i was supposed to be studying for my exams a while back!! because when am i inspired if not when i shouldn't be?? i hope you like it and i swear something is almost ready for me to publish please wait a little longer (for my engenes and atiny besties)

⚠️ it goes without saying that i in no way condone any obsessive/stalking/creepy/violent behavior and despite this being "x reader" i'm not in any way romanticizing anything i'm writing. also this, as you all know, is fiction and names are merely a narrating mean. ⚠️

i'm desperate for feedback and i love comments with your opinion!

(cross-posted on ao3 only)

navigation

in a way you’ve always loved him. he knows. you don’t even have to say it out loud for him to be happy. 

but sometimes it feels like you take him for granted. sometimes you make him really, really angry and that, he can’t let pass. and it's not for his sake but for yours. always everything for you. he has to make you understand that there are things you can’t do if you want to stay safe from the outside world. safe from him, sometimes.

running away is one of those ugly, wretched things you know well he hates, and he slams you against the wall and drags you back through the front door into the house by your hair, he bashes your head on the kitchen counter, near the fire of the stove he’s been preparing lunch with to make you understand a concept you're apparently too dumb to grasp.

“what the fuck did i tell you about running, uh?” seething with undiluted rage .

“i just wanted to go outside, tae. i swear!”

“i said what the fuck did i tell you about running!? do you understand how much it would hurt me to see you go?!” his voice booms inside the walls of your head, an endless echo that makes bitter tears gather at the back of your eyes and spill over.

your face is burning. tongues of fire lick at your cheeks, a scorching caress that reminds you of taehyung's. his palm always leaves a brand behind, reminding him and yourself that he’s there. 

your hands scramble for his in a miserable attempt to lessen his hold. “i’m sorry, tae! so sorry, please! please!”

his closed fist in your hair pushes your head closer to the heat. “i’ll fucking kill you if i have to, you know that right–” it’s not a question, merely a promise, but you nod anyway, frantically, desperately– “they’ll never stop finding your body, baby. do you understand?” he screams and shakes you with his hands tight in your hair when you only cry in response.

“i said,” leaning in, mouth brushing over your ear. chills go down your back as his voice turns sickeningly mellow as if he’s whispering sweet nothings instead of threats, “do you understand?”

“yes! yes! god, yes i understand! tae, i’m so sorry! it’s all my fault! it’s all my fault!”

your mindless babbles seem to humor him and he moves your head at a safer distance. “and why is that?”

“ ‘twas my fault! i put myself in danger if i run. tae, please! i’m so sorry!” 

and you cry and cry and cry until you have nothing to give. until there’s only emptiness in your head that’s resting on his shoulder. until his shushes really feel reassuring. until he sits you down at the table to eat the lunch he prepared, the one that was so close to killing you. you nibble on it, too weak to really even taste the flavors.

he breaks the empty silence between you with a question. you startle at the sound of his voice and force your heavy eyes to focus on him.

“aren't you curious? about why i chose you?”

“no.”

he scrunches his eyebrows and regards you with a slightly displeased look that has you shrinking back on your chair. 

“but i want to tell you…” he whines.

you don’t say anything about his antics. despite him behaving like a child you’re terrified of what his reaction would be if you actually treated him like one, so you press your lips together and wait. 

“i like people that like me.” and it’s so simple how he says it. obvious, even.

“but why do you think i like you?” quietly, meekly.

he seems to like the question, his boxy smile one full of teeth that in other circumstances you would have found endearing. now it only makes him look like a predator, an animal, drool dribbling down his fangs, jaw ready to snap close around your neck if —and ultimately, when— you say or do the wrong thing. 

“oh, i was so happy, Y/N,” he coos, your name curling in his mouth with ease, as if you’re always been around each other, as if it belongs there, “that when i chose you, you came with me.”

your mouth gapes open at the absurdity of it all. you wonder if he really thinks that you wanted all of this, that you wanted to be taken from your home. you’d ask your old psychology professor if you’d be correct to label him as a narcissist of sorts. a man with too much power, and free time, and loneliness to exhaust all on himself that he had to go around looking for a scapegoat for his secret misery.  

“i didn’t– i didn’t come to you, taehyung. i didn’t have a choice.”

“so you were almost forced to come?”

“no,” it comes out more as a question than an answer and you lower your head in search of a way to rationalize the conversation at hand, “i was completely forced–”

“that’s what you tell yourself,” he retorts before you can even finish your sentence.

“it’s what i know is true,” you spit somewhat offended by his insinuation.  

his smile is a sick thing when you raise your head from the food on your plate —cold and uninviting. the smell alone makes you want to throw up. 

“are you sure?”

your anger leaves space for an unnerving sense of confusion. “what does that– what?”

your frown deepens as you watch him play around with his lunch. you follow his hands pushing back his glasses on his nose. the sick look of complacency that dances on his face seems to speak words that make the hairs at the back of your neck raise in dreadful anticipation. i know something about you that you don’t, his eyes say, and that alone is enough to make you want to scream.

he knows nothing!, you’d be shouting to the usually calm neighborhood, i haven’t told him anything about myself. he can’t know anything! he knows nothing! he knows nothing! you’d holler to the kids walking home from school hand in hand with their mothers who’d be looking at you with contempt, unaware of who lives among them. a wolf in sheep's clothing that could easily make you look like a psychopath. 

you’d do it, you swear to yourself that you’d do it all if it weren’t for the fact that you’ve got the inkling fear that you’ve truly gone mad. the doubt that crawls on your back and makes its way in your ears, slithering then, with much glee into your delusional brain.

how long have you been in this house? his house or the one you bought together once you finished college? did you meet him on a slow rainy day outside a coffee shop or did you catch him staring at you from the window before he broke in and took you from your bed, leaving behind torn sheets and a broken frame with a picture of your friends? does your mind deceive you? are you sane? is he?

it feels like you've had this exact same conversation with him an infinite number of times, always stuck in a loop of unease and sadness that you really can’t explain. loving looks sent your way melt into scary grimaces sometimes and all you can feel is guilt because that’s tae. your tae. the man you chose, the man that chose you.

you realize your vacant eyes are crying when you feel a thumb swipe your cheek with a gentleness that makes your stomach churn in disgust and again a voice tells you that there’s something wrong with you.

“baby, are you alright?”

the way you look at him does nothing to the sick warmth brewing in his stomach. your shiny little doe eyes peeking up at him from under wet lashes, asking for forgiveness that taehyung would never deny you. nose red from the frustration of being lost in your own mind and mouth parted as if to ask him to show you the way, the truth that you seem to have lost.

he stands up and rounds the table to you for you to bury your head in his chest. sobs shake your tired form.

“shh, it’s okay, baby. i swear everything it’s okay. it happens to forget.”

“i’m sorry, tae,” you plead through broken breaths. “i’m so sorry, please.”

he shushes you. lips plant themselves in the crown of your head, a hand rubs at your back soothingly.  

later, in the late evening, you lie in your bed. a bed. the sheets smell of him and the air you breathe does not feel like the one you're used to, but you’re calm. you think you are. maybe.

soft snores sound from behind you and you attempt to turn your head to make sure it’s him. 

“tae?” you let out a whisper. not one that expects itself to be heard.

“yeah?” voice hoarse from sleep.

“nothing.”

he buries his nose in the hair at the nape of your neck, inhaling the shampoo he bought for you. “what?”

“just wanted to make sure you were still here.”

“i’m always here, baby.”

you hum.

minutes pass slowly, like molasses, as if the hand of the seconds inside the alarm on your nightstand is fighting an invisible force, a wall of rubber that threatens to bounce time back. you think he’s fallen back asleep. breath slowing, chest heaving, lulling you to slumber.

you close your eyes. “tae?”

he doesn’t answer. a car alarm sounds from outside the closed curtains, its prolonged blaring bringing a certain agitation in your otherwise silent night. a breath of summer wind leaves bumps on your skin in its wake. you sigh and his arms tighten around your torso. an unconscious gesture, soft, loving.

“i dream of you–” you let your words sink into the air, into the boiling water you carry around in your lungs that doesn’t let you breathe properly, and you shiver again but not from the chill bite of the wind “–and it’s slow, and blue, and endless.”

behind you, taehyung’s mouth stretches into a smile.

in a way, you’ve always loved him. he’s certain of it now as he was before. and even if you didn’t, he will always make sure to make it a reality, one way or the other. wether you want it or not.

taglist: @taevestr @fa1ryjoons @vcutvante

[bitbybitwrites]

OK . . am a day late . . . but not much has been done around here, bc I was struggling to finish the latest chapter of Puppy Love. (my RWRB WIP).

But here's what I got for you - snippets from a couple of ficlet fridays I'm working on (one RWRB, one Klaine) that are going to really be a wee bit longer than what I share here and a snippet of the next chapter of my Klaine WIP - If I Can Make Your Heart My Home . . all under the cut.

Also, by the way, many thanks to the following folks who tagged me for this and six/several/seven sentence sunday these past few weeks - you are all awesome!:

@alasse9 @daisyishedwig @onthewaytosomewhere, @thesleepyskipper @forabeatofadrum

@sophie1973 @wordsofhoneydew @porcelainmortal @taste-thewaste @blueeyedgrlwrites

@annepi-blog @duchessdepolignaca03 @softboynick @thinkof-england

And if I forgot anyone I'm sorry!

1.) From If I Can Make Your Heart My Home (Klaine fic)

“Yes, Bradford. I’m curious as well.   What are you doing here?” Four heads whipped around quickly to focus on Lillian, her face inscrutable, watching them all from a few feet away. Bradford Anderson stepped through the doorway, forcing Cooper to back away reluctantly and frowning as he did so.  Cooper sidled closer to Blaine who had a similar expression on his face. Bradford leaned down to kiss Lillian on the cheek.  “Aren’t I allowed to come see my own mother - or even my sons?” Lillian’s mouth pursed as she debated her reply.  “I did think you and Pamela were spending the holiday season in south of France this year. You can’t blame me for being surprised at this impromptu visit.” Bradford shrugged as he removed his wool overcoat and held it out wordlessly towards his sons.  Blaine tentatively took it from his father.  Cooper quickly tore it from Blaine’s hands and tossed it unceremoniously into a nearby chair. “Yes, well, what a lovely day for a family reunion,” Cooper said tightly.  “But we were just sitting down with Nan for dinner . . ." “Wonderful,” Bradford said, cutting Cooper off from the rest of his thought.  “I think I’ll join you.”   And in a display of sheer self-centered obliviousness, Bradford Anderson waltzed out of the foyer and into the direction of the dining room, ignoring the rest of the party gaping at him as he walked by. For a few moments the four remaining in the hallways just stood in silence, unsure exactly what had happened before them. Kurt knew this was bad.  Very, very bad. He knew the last person on earth Blaine would have wanted to see right now, besides maybe Kurt, was his father. ‘Perhaps . . .I should go?”  Kurt suggested meekly. “I don’t want to interfere with any. . . um, family affairs . . .” he whispered.  Lilian sighed deeply as she closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose in an apparent sign of frustration with her own flesh and blood. “No, Kurt, please stay." she said. "You’ve been kind enough to cook for us and before our surprise guest made his appearance, I was going to ask you to join us.  I had just wanted to check with Blaine first. Blaine, sweetheart, what do you want us to do?” Lilian quietly asked. The question however, fell on deaf ears.  Blaine was all too focused on staring towards the direction his father disappeared to than listening to his grandmother. Kurt could practically feel the tension radiating off of him. “Squirt?” Cooper gently touched his brother’s arm. “Are you alright?” “Oh yeah, just perfect, “ Blaine muttered bitterly. “Blaine?” Blaine’s head quickly tuned to Kurt, who was nervously  was twisting the hem of his apron in his fingers.  “I can go, Blaine.  I don’t want to make things any more difficult for you than it already is.” “Stay. . .go.  It doesn’t matter to me,” Blaine said flatly.   “Blaine, I can tell your father to leave," Lillian said softly.  “You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” Blaine’s mouth set into a grim line as he squared his shoulders and started walking in the direction of where his father had left.  “Let’s just . . .get this over with,” he mumbled loud enough for the rest of them to hear.

*****

2.) Color Me Surprised (RWRB Ficlet Friday)

*I had a fic idea that I had stalled a bit on until I got this Fictlet Friday prompt - so I've decided to combine the two:

“No.” “Yes.” “No, Pez.  I think I’d rather eat glass.” Percy cocked a well-groomed eyebrow and regarded his best friend skeptically.  “I’m confused.  I’d thought you’d be at least a bit interested.   It is a rite of passage, especially in this area, no?” Henry sighed as he tipped his head back.  “Perhaps, but one I’m not sure I want to partake in.” “Hazza,” Pez chided his childhood friend.  “You are young, single and incredibly hot.  Why are you not taking advantage on all of this?” He shook his head in confusion.  “Stop acting like you're being tarred and feathered.  It’s just an extended weekend.  You have been cooped up in this office beating yourself up over the writers block you’ve been suffering from.  I am giving you a change of scenery, that’s all.” “And I suppose you propose I find my inspiration there?" “We're going to Fire Island. It's like gay Disney World.”  Pez elaborated.  “I propose there will be many a tight-bodied, ravishing specimen of inspiration to blow not only your writers block out of the water but hopefully your back as well as . ." Pez coughed and tossed in a very pointed look. ". . . well, one could hope. . . other neglected things.”  Pez' s rather pointed look was all too familiar to Henry. Henry groaned as he leaned his elbows onto his desk and dropped his head in his hands.  Pez smirked.  He knew he had won. “There will be vodka involved, won’t there?” Henry said as he mumbled through his fingers. “Of course, my darling.  Is there any doubt?”

3.) fire island follies (Klaine Ficlet Friday)

“I don’t know if this is a good idea, San.” Santana looked over at her friend and smirked.  “Lookin’ a little green about the gills, Hobbit.  You ok?” Blaine took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he clutched his duffle bag close to his chest.  The ferry was going through choppy water, and his stomach wasn't faring well at all.  No one could blame him; Blaine was from central Ohio and hadn't had much experience being on the open ocean. He opened his mouth to respond, but the moment the boat hit a particularly large wave.   The sea vessel bounced so much that Blaine snapped his mouth shut quickly, clapping one hand over it.  Santana swore he looked even more pale than he had a minute ago. “Don’t you dare hurl on me, Anderson.  I will kill you if you ruin these shoes.” A young couple and their kid moved away from where Blaine and Santana were sitting, looking at the young man warily.  Blaine gave them a weak smile and wave before he peered down at Santana's open-toe espadrilles. “Fancy footwear for the beach, don’t you think?” Santana snorted as she wiggled her Burberry-clad foot at Blaine.  "I gots to look good for my sweetie.” She leaned over and poked him in the side.  He squawked and batted her hand away.  “Can you just give me a smile for once and not look like I’m dragging you to your death.” The boat hit another wave and bounced again.  “I feel like death,” Blaine said through gritted teeth as his stomach did another somersault. "Just kill me now." “Oh, perk up, sunshine.  We're going to Fire Island.  It's like gay Disney World."

****

Well there ya go . . am also tagging ( if you are interested in sharing whatever you are working on - writing or otherwise): @spaceorphan18 @datshitrandom @justgleekout @myheartalivewrites @14carrotghoul

@little-escapist @cha-melodius @kirakiwiwrites @caramelcoffeeaddict @almightaylor

@1908jmd @tinyarmedtrex @theprinceandagcd @iboatedhere

@gleefuldarrencrissfan @gleefulpoppet @itsmaybitheway @kurtsascot @mynonah

@esilher @cryscendo @porcelainandthehobbit @hkvoyage @madas-ahatters-world

@sarkyblueeyes

And open tag of course for any one else!

[bi-bats]

Inspiration Saturday Sunday!! I was tagged by @ladytauria 💚 thank you bestieeee 💖💖💖💖💖

Okay so uh. Sorry to my jaytim ppl but this is not gonna be jaytim???

In a WILD turn of events, I sat down to write my Jaytim reverse robins fic bc I was feeling inspired about it and I wrote the first chapter. And then by the time I got to the end of it I was like oh. Oh this is actually DamiTim. And then I just. Couldn't stop writing. I definitely am still going to write the Jaytim flavored version, so no one worry about that, but apparently, this is also happening!!

So here you are, some Nightwing!Damian/Red Hood!Tim!!!! I hope you all enjoy 💖 (context to the scene: they are on the phone at a ridiculously early hour)

“I told you already, you may scold me if you like.” “Scold you? Right now I’d like to strangle you.” “I think that would be fair.” Tim laughs, a surprised, sudden noise, and Damian wants to beam. “How is your throat?” he asks, and his voice has gone gentle, softness leaking into it. “It’s fine.” Tim's voice is icing over, losing warmth. “And your wrist?” “You left a few bruises, but nothing’s broken. Full range of motion. Does it matter?” Of course, Damian wants to say. Of course it matters. “I did not mean to hurt you.” “You never mean to,” Tim mutters, and Damian isn’t entirely sure he was meant to hear it. “What are you doing right now?” “Making coffee,” Tim sighs, irate. “Do you still take it with an obscene amount of sugar?” Damian asks, trying to get him back, trying to get his brother back. He wonders how much of the rest of his life will be spent trying to get his brother back. “No, I drink it black.” That knowledge settles painfully under his left rib. “You used to take it with so much sugar that I was concerned.” Tim scoffs. “And you still won’t touch the stuff, I’m sure? Only fine teas for the prince?” Damian squeezes his eyes shut. “I have… developed a taste for coffee.” “I bet your blend costs five thousand dollars a bean.” “I don’t think it even costs five cents a bean.” “Oh? Where do you source it?” “The bodega.” Tim snorts. “Sorry, sorry. I’m just trying to picture Damian Wayne walking into a bodega with a sword strapped to his back, digging through his pockets for enough change to afford his morning cup.” A smile curls across Damian’s lip, against his will. He is powerless to prevent it. “The owner is Egyptian. It can be nice to have a conversation in Arabic, every once in a while.” There’s a pause before Tim answers him.

“How do you take your coffee?” he asks in Arabic. “Black,” Damian responds in Arabic, feeling that same feeling he always gets when he gets to rest his English. Like collapsing onto his bed after an especially long day, remembering that his comforter and sheets and pillows were waiting for him. “I didn’t know you missed speaking Arabic.” “I never knew you spoke Arabic.” “Yes, you did,” Tim snaps, abruptly switching back to English. “You knew.” “…not when I would have had an occasion to use it.” “An occasion, are you kidding me? Any time you wanted. Any time you wanted to walk into the manor and say anything to me, you know I would have listened. I would have done anything for you, don’t you get that?” Damian sighs at himself. Why is he even doing this? Every time he thinks he finds an opening, Tim slams the door on his fingers. “Yes, I do." “You are infuriating to talk to, you know that?” “Yes,” Damian answers. “Why are you staying on the phone with me?” “Because you—” Tim groans at himself, and Damian feels like an intruder. “You always make me want more than I can have.” Before Damian can think of an answer to that, Tim has hung up.

No-pressure tagging @yasmindifference, @jpeg-dot-jpeg, @chipmunkery, and @cheetahleopard!!!

[trashogram]

Oh HELL yes!

Okay, so in the dream, Imp!Reader works the night shift at a 24 hour Waffle House-esque diner, wearing a glamour to make her look human. She even has a cute little name tag decorated with stickers, and goes by the name 'Etsy Betsy', as a play on 'itsy bitsy' since she's super short. Apparently she'd found a way to leave Hell and pop on up to Earth so she could get a better job and support her kids. (She also gets to take home all the leftover food from under the heat lamps at the end of her shifts.)

One night Blitzø gets done with a job and the rest of the team goes back to Hell to do their own thing, but bossman doesn't feel like heading home to wallow in depression, so he slaps on a glamour and - as you do - winds up at Ye Old Greasy Breakfast Joint™️at 3am.

Thus begins the new routine of him slipping back up to Earth to visit his cute new crush pester buddy and try to mooch free food off her by flirting. (She has kids. She ain't having none of it. 😆) And because she isn't falling for his shit, he feels safe kind of opening up to her - because nothing's ever going to come of it, right? - and she halfway takes up the Bartender Psychologist role, even giving him parenting tips.

The dream ended around that point, sadly, but I am now rattling and I needed to share~

I am also rattling the bars of my own cage bc this sounds so fun and I’m invested. Etsy Betsy is the cutest damn thing I’ve heard in a minute omg. Does Blitzø know she’s an imp in disguise??? I know it was a dream not a full narrative but still 😭😂

(Blitzø and Betsy watching the 3rd fistfight of the night at the Waffle house. Betsy smacks his hand away from her takeout box of hashbrowns. Perfect date night.)

Did you get to smell pancakes in ur dream 🥺 that sounds like heaven.

[potol0ver]

Hi i am asking for anything at all for erik with a male reader </333 Just anything from your brain i am desperate for m!reader fics.

Apparently I’m a masochist bc I came up with THE PERFECT scenario but I have school in thirty minutes so I have to wait until after the school day to actually write it- this also deleted half way through when I was taking a break-

I've never written for an M!reader or for an MLM fan fic, so if I messed anything up or you want me to tweak anything don't be shy and PLEASE tell me.

Tags; fluffy, sweet, maybe cliche?, M!reader x Erik

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were in bed staring at the ceiling, you couldn’t relax tonight due to stress. Not because work was stressful, no, it was because your boyfriend Erik has been overworking himself to the point that he even blocked YOU out. He has been hyper-focused on some for weeks now, and it's taking him away from you.

You've had enough of it, he can act distant all he likes, but you were not going to let him work himself to death. Whipping the blanket off yourself and grabbing a candle, you fast walk into the nearest catacombs entrance. Your mind continues to spiral about his state all through the winding stairs.

Soon enough you find the glow of his abode and just as you were about to make yourself known you pause. His workspace was littered with papers and fabric, but the scene of Erik kneeling at a white suit with the most beautiful lace littered on it took your breath away. It might've been your imagination, but the way the candles hit the suit gave it a halo-like glow.

Erik soon enough stood up, he took off a pin cushion bracelet and a needle and thread. He rubbed his face and took a deep tired sigh. Obviously overworked, he looked at a calendar through his fingers. His eyes shot wide as he realized it was Valentine's day. Making a 180 of his previous mood, he moved frantically around looking for something, then he saw you. 

“Mon Amour! How long have you been there?” he questioned out of breath, then realizing you saw the suit he began to try and hide it. You quickly moved to him and place a hand on his shoulder.

“Erik please, don't hide it, its stunning.” you say with a soft smile. Eriks form finally softening at your touch.

“You really think so?” he looked at you with puppy dog eyes, placing a hand on yours. “You like it?”

“God yes Erik, but I am frustrated with you. You've locked yourself up here for weeks on end. I was getting worried sick! I couldn't get through to you, and I'm your boyfriend Erik. Please don't do that again.” you plead with him and you hug him, arms around his waist, forehead resting on his shoulder.

Hesitating he wrapped his arms around you and leaned his head against yours. “I'm sorry, I truly am... Let me show you how much I care for you.” he pulled away from you and pulled out a tiny velvet box from his pants. Before you could question it, he got down on one knee and opened the box to show a breathtaking ring.

“My muse, you have been everything I have ever dreamed of and more. Even with a face like this, you've shown me true kindness and love. Even with everything I've done, you choose to love me. I haven't asked much of you other than your loyalty, so let me ask you one more thing. Will you bless me and be my husband?”

You stared down at him trying your best not to cry. You nod weakly not trusting your voice, and gave him your left hand. Smiling he took the ring out of the box and placed it on your ring finger. Once he got up, you nearly knocked him over with your hug, not long after you pulled him into a deep kiss. You both melted into it, full of love and desire, neither of you wanted to stop. Sadly pulling away due to loss of breath, your foreheads rested against each other.

“Happy Valentine's day my love.”

[forabeatofadrum]

Hello folks! Happy Out of Touch Thursday. I am a day late, because yesterday I was out and about all day, so thank you @facewithoutheart​, @confused-bi-queer​, @wellbelesbian​ and @artsyunderstudy​ for the tags.

It is actually a great timing, because today I found out that I have passed my thesis! Guys, I think I just kind of graduated university. My advisor sent me this:

Not going to lie, I expected a better grade (I got a 6.5), but you know what, I accept it. I had a lot of problems with my thesis and I most of the time felt like I had no clue what I was doing, so I am glad that I made it. Not only that, but I had fun doing it, most of the time. The real grade is the friends we made along the way or something.

I will make sure y’all can read it if you want. As mentioned, I can put it in my university’s thesis repository, but then it’ll be in Dutch so I will translate it for my “international audience”. I do want to come back to this question: do you guys think it is allowed on AO3?

Anyway, the moment I handed in my thesis on Sunday I just started fic writing. I even made a meme about it, because of course I did. I’ll put the snippet under the cut with the weather.

So yeah I just finished 6 chapters of Ljubim te but not the upcoming one. Fun. I also worked a bit on the Quinn side-story, because yes, there is a Quinn side-story. Not only that, but I have gotten ideas for the final chapter and then it’ll be over.

I actually hope to have this fic finished before I go on vacation, because that would be lovely, but I am not going to force it. I’m glad I am finally seeing the end, because I am excited to share the story with you.

Here’s some stuff from Ljubim te to begin with:

“Oh, there is a hat shop over there,” Kurt says after Quinn’s detailed everything about her fancy beret. It’s a bit on the nose, but it is stunning and it keeps the sun out of her eyes. “You should check it out.”

Kurt gives Quinn the route towards Rikoma, Miha Kotar s.p.

Quinn beams towards Blaine.

“Oh babe, I keep telling you to not slick back you hair, so that you can wear a fancy hat as well. We should go there!”

Kurt’s stomach churns when he hears the term of endearment.

Kurt and Quinn await Blaine’s reaction. It’s an out. They’ve had their dinner and they can go. Kurt has given him a way out, and he didn’t even mean to. But to Kurt’s surprise, Blaine declines.

“How about you check it out,” he says to Quinn.

“Oh. Okay.” Quinn seems as surprised as Kurt.

Yes, Quinn is a hat person in this fic. I don’t know when that started, but it first because the hat shop is actually really nice. AND the new VIGÒ store is apparently next to it. In fact, when I saw the location of the new VIGÒ my first thought was: “No, the hat shop is gone???” but it isn’t. They’re neighbours.

And now, the weather: @quizasvivamos @blurglesmurfklaine @coffeegleek @esperantoauthor @otherworldsivelivedin @caramelcoffeeaddict @sillyunicorn @bazzybelle @dragoneggos @raenestee @tectonicduck @nightimedreamersworld @urban-sith @thnxforknowingme @captain-aralias @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @takitalks @justgleekout @cerriddwenluna @tea-brigade @ivelovedhimthroughworse @moodandmist @whogaveyoupermission @bookish-bogwitch @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @ionlydrinkhotwater @1908jmd @special-bc-ur-part-of-it @larkral @chen-chen-chen-again-chen @cutestkilla @martsonmars @shrekgogurt @boyinjeans @rockitmans @bitbybitwrites @whatevertheweather​ @nightimedreamersghost​

[rollercoasterwords]

Yes yes yes to all of your points about jegulus and the capitalism of fandom as a whole. I find the whole thing so interesting in a mildly terrifying way lmao

One thing I’ve noticed with jegulus on TikTok that I’ve never really registered seeing with another ship (tho I could obviously be wrong, thx algorithm) is that people advertise their fics in a way I’ve not really seen before in forms of countdowns and trailers pre posting. And yes be proud of what you’ve created, I am the biggest supporter of tooting your own horn but sometimes it feels a little… off to me. Like almost like people are viewing fic writing as becoming ‘content creators’ and trying to go viral with these pieces of work in the same way that art and TikToks goes viral. And with the marauders and jegulus in particular being such a TikTok heavy fandom (as you pointed out in your essay) maybe that’s why it’s more apparent, because a lot more people interacting with this subsection of the fandom have been ‘raised’ (for lack of a better word) to view the internet as a place where the point is to go viral and become well known, so to create art for the sake of creation is an entirely alien concept. So why would you not make a trailer for your story and post it half a dozen times to TikTok?

And then pair that with jegulus having fewer works than bigger ships which means that the ‘bigger’ fics are known and read by the majority, which ultimately means that people have a better chance of going ‘viral’ if they post a story with that pairing compared to wolfstar where the competition is higher.

I’ve never really kept a track of these fics that are advertised and hyped up before chapters are posted, but I would be interested in how many are abandoned if and when the author doesn’t get a barrage of kudos and comments, and the subsequent serotonin boost with it.

Sorry this ask doesn’t really have much of a point or direction, (and I’m not even sure if it even made much sense ☠️) it’s just something I’ve been noticing with increasing frequency recently and I was wondering if you had any thoughts, as you write your points and arguments so well!!

anon i literally want to kiss u on the mouth u brought up sooooo many good points!! yes i have so so so many thoughts about this maybe i need to make a separate post bc like....ive talked so much about the way that like. people interact as readers with the like tiktok/social media/influencer mindset but ive definitely seen it crop up with people who write fanfic too. and the thing is bc there aren't really cleanly delineated boundaries between readers + writers of fanfic (like....most of the writers are also readers, and many of the readers are also writers) it definitely comes from both sides.

i think for anyone who has like. internalized this mentality that art must be validated by an audience to be worthwhile and that you can only be Seen by turning urself into content for consumption it's very easy to approach fanfiction with a mindset stuck in a consumer economy. and like. that isn't a moral failing, because we are literally all being conditioned to think of any creative pursuit as something that is only worthwhile if it can be turned into Profitable Content. but i DO think it's important to recognize when we're falling into that mindset, because fanfiction is so antithetical to it. and also just like....i don't think any of these people who are approaching fanfiction with this underlying idea that they need to curate an audience for validation will be able to find deep or lasting joy, because if your primary motivation in writing is just to get as many eyes on it as possible, then like....idk. it will never be enough. there will always be someone with a more popular story, with more people reading it.

and like. i actually mentioned this in my little tiktokification essay that escaped confinement, and i got a bunch of responses of people in the tags or reblogs going "there is NOTHING WRONG with wanting to share your work and wanting people to read it!!!" and i was like...i didn't say there was anything wrong with it?? i said if your primary motivation in creating art is just to get as many eyes on it as possible, you probably will not find lasting joy in the creation of that art. so :/

anyway now i think i want to write another essay so thank u for that anon lmao

[blueberry-beanie]

15 Questions 15 Mutuals

Thanks for tagging me, N!

1. Are you named after anyone? No, my parents just liked the name I guess.

2. When was the last time you cried? A few weeks ago, but it wasn’t out of sadness.

3. Do you have kids? nop

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Maybe too much

5. What sports do you play/have played? I used to do ballet as a kid (not the serious kind) and have been riding horses for many years (currently again on a break because no money and not a lot of time). I also like playing Badminton and I used to enjoy gymnastics at school.

6. What's the first thing you notice about people? I’m often the one to compliment acquaintances about a new haircut or clothing/shoes. I’m not amazing with remembering faces, so I guess I pay more attention to other things. Also I am quite attentive on people’s voices.

7. What's your eye color? grey-blueish

8. Scary movies or happy endings? World is tough enough, at least give me happy endings

9. Any special talents? I asked N and she said: “art, quickness and organising” make of this whatever you like lol

10. Where were you born? in a town in the north of Germany

11. What are your hobbies? procrastinating. Doing this may involve: making gifs, drawing, reading, getting obsessed with musicians and lately apparently German cabaret artists and then curating tumblr blogs about them, collecting cds and music mags and annoying my friends with the most random things I can come up with.

12. Do you have pets? No, I used to have a cat at my parent’s place, but he died last year.

13. How tall are you? 1,68 m

14. Favorite subject in school? Latin. Yes, I absolutely loved Latin and spent so much time and energy studying it and trying to have zero mistakes in my translations. I also enjoyed other languages such as German and English but that depended heavily on the teacher. Funnily I also enjoyed politics and economics, mostly bc I had amazing teachers as well. Music theory and everything that involved maths were my arch enemies in school (and still are!).

15. Dream job? What do you mean I can’t just exist and make art and go to concerts and go on trail rides with cute horseys? Damn. Well, at the moment I really enjoy working at the student radio. Since I have no other good ideas and the involvement there is giving me good chances, probably I’ll end up at some radio station. I’m tagging: @lisanek @swallowedinthestars, @lovewildgreen, @steelfeathersnn, @lovewildgreen, @palebluedream, @there-is-purpose-after-all, @wateryblasts, @threepwillow, @pitchforkhead, @stroyent, @knockmeforsix, @canofstella-fishfilet & you if you’re reading this :)

[catchingpapermoons]

top 10 fics by kudos

hi it’s me @drysdaales :) so my top ten kudos’d fics and whether i agree with where they’ve landed? i’m going to play a little differently and bc i have apparently been writing for a long while (am i old?) i’m going to take my top 3 kudos’d fics from from my most recent fandoms and just put those in order of kudos (plus a bonus fic to make ten) so here we go! ty @hard4softthings for the tag i appreciate u ❣️ under a cut (hopefully pls mobile)

10. you’re alive (so alive) (jatp | gen fic)

agree/disagree: i’m choosing disagree only bc this is one of the best things i’ve ever written and it wasn’t appreciated enough. sometimes we all need to explore grief through a children’s show right??

9. too soft for all of it (hrpf | jdtz, slice of life + h/c)

agree/disagree: i have zero complaints about this fic and i’m proud of myself for this being my second foray into hrpf fandom. to all who read and enjoyed, i see u and thank u kindly for giving her love!

8. you’re the only one my heart keeps coming back to (jatp | reggiealex, non-ghost college au)

agree/disagree: i’m gonna disagree on this one but that’s only bc it reads a little too much like a soap opera to me. but i’m glad it found a home where people enjoyed :)

7. wherever you stray, i follow (jatp | phantoms poly, canon compliant)

agree/disagree: yeah i love this one it feels right to be here

6. wanna feel your heart (hrpf | mat/tito, multiple universes)

agree/disagree: i know why it landed and i see the appeal in it and i went back and read comments on it the other day and was just pleased as punch to see how people interpreted it! i wrote this fic in 2018 (!!!) at a time where i was going through something heinous and i was so young and just wanted to be in control of something. i’ve done better work since, but i love her for what she is.

5. so quiet in the world tonight (hrpf | jdtz, idiots taking care of a baby)

agree/disagree: yes. wholeheartedly. tbh i reread this fic sometimes bc i love it. i wrote this shit for me and she unironically slaps

4. here everyone knows you’re the way to my heart (rnm | malex, spec fic, bonus fic bc i love her dearly)

agree/disagree: i do agree with this one though it’s placement as to how many kudos it received is wild to me! i’m immensely proud of this fic and i loved what i wrote here.

3. you remind me of home (oh, baby, merry christmas) (911 | buddie)

agree/disagree: i have no idea what y’all saw in this but good for you! it’s a silly little christmas fic TO ME but for some reason i get kudos and comments at all times of the year. thanks cuties

2. across our great divide (a glorious sunrise) (911 | buddie, therapy as a plot device)

agree/disagree: i love this fic so much. the reaction to it was so cool. i loved the insane amount of comments i got telling me how masterfully i’d written bc i love hearing i did a good job but i also loved people telling me how it made them feel.

1. when i was shipwrecked (i thought of you) (911 | buddie, canon-adjacent)

agree/disagree: i have no idea what made this one hit for you. i am SO happy it did, but it’s insane to me. i love that you love it because its made ME love it more. this is my most kudos’d fic and it’s bonkers bananas to me !!!

extra bonus! a fic that deserves more love is dance for all that we’ve been through because i wrote 61k of an entire ballet au and relived all my old ballet trauma and this girl did NOT get her flowers :/ to date it’s probably my best work and it’s ok that it didn’t get received as well but also… it’s good ok!!!

tagging my bbs @smileymikey @inthekitchenmp3 and uhhhh whoever else wants to lmao

[noramoons]

GET TO KNOW ME TAG GAME!

tysm for tagging me and thinking of me @end-hyphen and @petrichor-han ! i am late to the game as always 🤡 bc i did let this marinate in my drafts for a week for absolutely no reason but !! this was fun hehe i loved reading yalls too <33

this is also super long so answers under the cut!

BIRTHDAY

october 17

FAVORITE COLOR

dark blues and pastels

DO YOU HAVE PETS?

one cat! he is staring up at me from across the room as i write this lmao

HOW TALL ARE YOU?

5’5 (165 cm)!

HOW MANY PAIRS OF SHOES DO YOU OWN?

i think between 10-12 but there’s only 5 pairs i wear regularly. literally wear the exact same loafers to work every single day 👍

FAVORITE SONG?

literally changes every day lmao but rn it’s probably between good life by wayv, back down by p1harmony, or avalanche by walk the moon

FAVORITE MOVIE?

everything everywhere all at once OR kiki’s delivery service OR scream (1996) LMAO i love watching all different kinds of movies but horror has rlly been my fave over the past year or so <3

WHO WOULD BE YOUR IDEAL PARTNER?

lee seokmin OR someone who makes me laugh, is patient, kind, caring, and a good listener. someone who i don’t feel like i have to put on a performance for and who i can be myself around. and who understands all my little interests! like tv and movies and kpop hehe

DO YOU WANT CHILDREN?

absolutely not! LMAO the cat is enough <3

HAVE YOU GOTTEN IN TROUBLE WITH THE LAW?

i’ll copy genie’s answer and just say i was a very stupid teenager who thankfully never actually went to the police station BUT i try to be a smarter adult now bc of it HAHA

WHAT COLOR SOCKS ARE YOU WEARING?

blue and white striped!

FAVORITE TYPE OF MUSIC?

i rlly do listen to just about anything but since this IS a kpop blog i’ll say kpop. honorable mentions include 70s dad rock, alt/indie rock, anime osts, and classical (study playlist my beloved)

HOW MANY PILLOWS DO YOU SLEEP WITH?

two! one for my head and one beside me lmao

WHAT POSITION DO YOU SLEEP IN?

on my side usually. or curled up in a ball since my room is always freezing cold ahaha

WHAT DON’T YOU LIKE WHEN YOU’RE SLEEPING?

when i can see light coming under my door from another room in the hallway…drives me absolutely bonkers i need complete darkness to be able to sleep or i cannot 💀

WHAT DO YOU HAVE FOR BREAKFAST?

if i have time to eat i usually just make cereal! sometimes my work brings in bagels and cream cheese too which is always a treat <3

HAVE YOU EVER TRIED ARCHERY?

yes! HAHA my parents tried literally any and every sport/activity they could get me in as a kid bc surely i had to be good at ONE, right? (answer: no 💀) i was decent but definitely not a sharpshooter by any means lmao. i do still have my bow and arrows and the target we used to practice with (and this is also why the reader in frw&d shoots w a bow n arrow — since it’s the only ‘weapon’ i have any real experience with for writing 🤭)

FAVORITE FRUIT?

strawberries, kiwi, and mango!

ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR?

absolutely not lmao i have tried for many years but apparently i just look incredibly obvious when i try to lie 😐

WHAT’S YOUR PERSONALITY TYPE?

enfj!

INNIE OR OUTIE?

literally what does this mean. my bellybutton??? do i like going outside????

LEFT OR RIGHT HANDED?

right-handed!

FAVORITE FOOD?

poppyseed chicken! OOO or i had lemon bars the other day and they were absolutely 🔥

FAVORITE FOREIGN FOOD?

omg there’s a thai restaurant literally 2 seconds away from my house that is SO damn good. i’d eat there every day if i could LMAO

AM I CLEAN OR MESSY?

i think i’m very selectively clean bahaha like my bathroom has to be nice and organized or i’ll lose my mind but my room is always in some state of disaster

MOST USED PHRASE?

do i have one?? idek actually 💀

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR YOU TO GET READY?

i don’t put in a ton of effort for work these days LMAO so like 10 minutes probably?? if i’m going out for dinner or something else w other ppl tho between 20-30 minutes

DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF?

100% HAHA this is the best way to get fic ideas and also sometimes i think i’m funny y’know 😻

DO YOU SING TO YOURSELF?

every time i get in my car it’s a concert babey !!

ARE YOU A GOOD SINGER?

absolutely not HAHA but that’s why it’s fun to just jam in the car or in my room <3

BIGGEST FEAR?

drowning, caves, letting ppl down

ARE YOU A GOSSIP?

🍵🍵🍵 bring me the tea PLS i think a healthy dose of gossip is good for you actually

DO YOU LIKE LONG OR SHORT HAIR?

on me i think i prefer short (even though it’s growing out again rn). long hair for literally everyone else though HAHA

FAVORITE SCHOOL SUBJECT?

any english or writing courses and history!!

EXTROVERT OR INTROVERT?

extrovert!

WHAT MAKES YOU NERVOUS?

having to drive long distances and making phonecalls 😧

WHO WAS YOUR FIRST REAL CRUSH?

one of those mfs from newsies (1992) most likely LMAO or nick from walk the moon 🫶

HOW MANY PIERCINGS?

just two on my earlobes for now! not going to do anything else until i figure out if i can get more with my job HAHA

HOW MANY TATTOOS?

none </3 i wanna get the homunculus tattoo from fmab SO BAD

HOW FAST CAN YOU RUN?

if i’m running i’m either on the treadmill or being chased so. probably not that fast

WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HAIR?

brown. rlly want to get skunk hair with blonde underneath but once again……need to see if my job will allow it lmfao

WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?

blue!

WHAT MAKES YOU ANGRY?

many things but today it’s the governor of my state and ppl who are rude to service workers

DO YOU LIKE YOUR NAME?

yes! i picked out beck a long time ago bc i liked the androgyny of it and i still rlly like it <33

DO YOU WANT A BOY OR A GIRL AS A CHILD?

no kids babey!! my cat is a boy though and he’s enough

WHAT ARE YOUR STRENGTHS?

i’m resourceful, creative, and i don’t give up on things that are important to me.

WHAT ARE YOUR WEAKNESSES?

why is this a job interview i can’t shut up once i start talking and have a hard time being able to tell when i need to stop. also mega perfectionist and tend to overanalyze every other conversation i have lmao

WHAT’S THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDSPREAD?

white with purple flowers!

WHAT’S THE COLOR OF YOUR ROOM?

it’s this purplish grey (which doesn’t sound super appealing but i promise it’s a very calming color LOL i painted it over the summer) and i have brown wood floors.

tagging: @seung-scrittore @decembermoonskz @sulfurcosmos @lotus-dly @lixesque @txtkids and anyone who would like to or hasn’t already done this! as always, no pressure on the tags — these are just for fun and nothing serious 🤍

[lemonhemlock]

I was on Twitter and Will Bowers posted that he hoped the Aegon scene was a fakeout. Given that we know now that Dyana will be returning next season it does beg certain questions.

Twitter seems to think she may be out for revenge and team up with Mysaria for 🩸and 🧀, perhaps being in league with Talya the whole time who makes fake moontea. Which idk why that would be righteous thing, team black utterly baffles me at times.

Yet given the honest confusion on Aegon’s face when confronted with the accusation by Alicent do you think such a scenario is possible.

Would be bold of hotd to have a woman make a false rape accusation and I really don’t know how that would go down but part of me really wants it to be the case. I’m sick to death of debating with team black stans that Aegon not only has a claim to the Iron Throne but in fact a stronger one than Rhaenyra, only to be called a rapist defender.

Which is not at all my argument but these comments slowly push me toward just outright claiming Egg2 would be a better king out of spite.

The show runners claimed they wanted to make Aegon gray and yet make TGC a rapist in his first appearance. Nothing gray about that my friend. So if it all turns out to be a lie what do you think the fall out will be ?

Love the blog 💚

Anonymous asked: did you know that Dyana from episode 8 is coming back and will be in 4 more episodes??? apparently actor's own agency confirmed it. I'm speechless...... what role can she possibly have that requires so many episodes? are they trying to bury the greens for good in the eyes of the audience? every leak is a disaster, and worse than the previous one

hi, guys, i already talked about this topic in the dyanna tag and i have an entire other tag where i make my stance on leaks speculation. likewise, i spoke many times about how i don't like and don't agree with this writing choice of straight-up turning aegon into westerosi satan from the get-go. but what's done is done, there's no point in denying what was shown on screen. he's written as a rapist and the scenes are made to be interpreted as rape, not as some smear campaign that'll later turn into a gotcha moment. IF we ever get out hands on the scripts, it would be very interesting to compare what the original plan looked like and what they changed on the fly / if they changed anything at all / if aegon was always meant to be this awful from the very beginning etc

as much as i would like them to retcon that in some way, idek if it's worth it at this point, bc portraying women lying on screen about rape is much more damaging than losing fictional civil wars involving flying lizards. we need more nuanced media surrounding sexual assault and women's issues and perhaps hotd is not the appropriate medium for this as the writers seem incapable in many ways of handling a delicate subject like that. yes, i think it was a mistake that compromises the quality of the narrative and, no, i don't think hotd is necessarily going to offer us groundbreaking feminist commentary, but dyanna the fake rape victim is really bottom of the barrel stuff - like, even they could & should do much better than that.

also, to be honest, i don't think the writers are particularly interested in making aegon a complex character, unfortunately. maybe they'll compensate with this characterization in some other ways, though; i am not excluding the possibility of redress. we'll live and see.

[sga-owns-my-soul]

thanks @frostysfrenzy for the tag!!

Were you named after anybody? nope! my siblings both have their middles names after our grandparents but i’m not named after anyone

When was the last time you cried? uhh idk honestly i think a few days ago?

Do you have kids? no and i don’t want any. my brother has two girls and my friend has a kid and i love them but i am more than happy in the aunt role thanks

Do you use sarcasm a lot? it was tempting to respond to this with sarcasm 😂😂 yes i use sarcasm a lot i am a very sarcastic person and it’s a little problematic honestly

What sports did you play/have you played? when i was a tiny baby child i played soccer, and in grade 7 i did cheerleading which i loved and desperately want to get back into some day, even just casually

What’s the first thing you notice in somebody? idk probably their hair honestly

Eye colour? blue but they get really grey when i’m upset apparently (idk i don’t tend to look in mirrors when i’m crying)

Scary movies or happy endings? i do love some good angst or suspension but i’m a sucker for a happy ending (especially a happy ending following an angsty story that’s some good stuff)

Any special talents? does cat grooming count? i don’t wanna brag or boast so i won’t go too much into it (unless people want me to bc tbh i could probably make an essay about it) but i’m really good at what i do and a big part of it is bc i respect the cats and if they are telling me “no this needs to stop” i will always listen. cats are very dramatic and i know the difference between “i’m annoyed and this sucks” and “i am not okay with this situation and i’m warning you that you need to stop” and listening when they need you to makes SUCH a difference in the service. anyways i’m proud of the work that i do and i’m really passionate about it (and i’m kinda really good)

Where were you born? in a hospital! in the horrible province of alberta, canada! (i’m kidding it’s actually a beautiful province and there’s a lot to love our government just kinda sucks and a lot of people are really bigoted)

What are your hobbies? i watch a lot of tv (stargate mostly at the moment surprise surprise) and read/write fan fic (take a guess what) but i’ve been trying to pick up some more stuff that takes me away from screens. i started drawing, which im horrible at and i love. i started knitting, and as soon as i get the right needles im gonna make a temperature blanket. im also trying to take up swimming, dancing, and rock climbing to get into better shape! i love all 3 activities im just really bad at making myself be active so it’s a slow process lol

Do you have pets? yes!! currently just my orange gremlin, charlie (should i make a post about him i feel like he deserves a space on my blog idk lemme know if i should) and he owns my heart (even if he is a fuckin menace who ruins my life and never lets me sleep)

How tall are you? idk 5’2? 5’3? ish? somewhere around that range

Favourite subject in high school? theatre in general but specifically tech theatre. i took a theatre intensive class all 3 years of high school and it was 4 classes rolled into one and tech theatre was one of them. i ended up doing stage management in grade 11 kind of as a fluke and i fell in LOVE it was so much fun i miss it

Dream job? cat grooming 🥰🥰🥰 i love it so so much and i love that i get to do it for my career

this was so fun thanks again for the tag!! i��m gonna tag @the-mushroom-faerie @spurious @books-space-things @zababova-pomsta @colonelshepparrrrd and as always anyone else who wants to but hasn’t been tagged! ((no pressure to do this if you don’t want to!))

[crehador]

package day! checked my unboxing tag and apparently it’s been nearly four months since my last one, so this’ll be some much overdue serotonin

(icsm mochis are just spectating, they’ve lived here for ages lol)

this was originally just a one-item order but of course as always i fell into the “oh i should add more stuff so shipping is more worth it” trap...

so my first pair of mimakura stands came home!! these are actually quite a bit bigger than i was expecting, and very ridiculously cute

tempted to grab the other cool doji danshis from this set too but i have perhaps already made enough impulsive purchases as of late lol

the other random adds were...

bb water bottle (as if i have any shortage of cups and water bottles lmao) and tinie kuroko!!! the little kuroko is even smaller than i thought he would be, but he is the perfect size to hold in your hands and love and cherish forever and i am distraught that they did not make the rest of the gom (there is a market! it is me!!)

last but certainly not least

the long-awaited silverash noodle topper was the only thing that was meant to be in this order but then i thought well what’s better than one silverash noodle topper?

YES TWO SILVERASH NOODLE TOPPERS for the time being i have only unboxed one bc i have no idea what i’m going to do with two of these lmao i am just doing my part to encourage the creation of more arknights noodle toppers (LEE!! PLEASE!!!)

package was delivered very late in the day so i need to use the sleep and may bother to take better pics tomorrow because he is quite lovely for a 2k figure, don’t love the face but ENORMOUS tail SAULTRY pose LOVELY hands 10/10 he will be living on my desk until mr lee one day (SOON, HOPEFULLY) comes to replace him

[dykeza]

Edit: this post is too long it’s going under read more so I don’t feel as evil tagging it okay thanks. Hi guys it’s me the asshole again can I say smth possibly controversial and tone deaf? Okay thanks .

I think a terrible amount of backlash towards SSO is done under the assumption that SSO is a small team that became a large Horse Game Corporation with a monopoly on Horse Games in the last 13 years . This is not true. SSO is still a small game worked on by a small team (there’s frequent posts on their instagram featuring basically the whole team— including like the Singular Lady that models all the horses. Like that’s One Person, Maybe More but Not A Lot More). Just bc it has more polish does not mean it’s suddenly not made by a small team in a likely rented office space who strive to pay their workers fairly. Lots of ppl on Reddit saying shit like “I wonder if the higher-ups at the sso company make it so the designers can’t do whatever they want :(“ There aren’t any higher-ups. It’s important to me that you know that. SSO hiking prices and lowering rewards and releasing smaller and smaller updates CAN be a bit shitty, I’m not saying it’s not. I’m saying there’s nuance that’s lost when a bunch of primarily older teenaged and adult women and queer ppl— (I am aware how insane that sounds but I don’t think many straight cis dudes are rockin with the horse game, and if they are they’re not the majority) —are yelling in Instagram comment sections about how shitty the SSO dev team is because they (checks notes) have to raise the prices of their horse game because they have to maintain a livable wage for themselves, pay rent and utility bills on their machines and spaces that they need to even make the game, and pay for marketing and other expenses, in a global post-Covid hyper-inflated economy. So woe is you that star coins cost more. A 10k star coin gift card used to be 108 dollars around my neck of the woods (America) and now it’s 79.99. That’s less money btw in case you can’t do math because you’re too blinded by your rage over game designers, artists, developers, and coders being paid more than peanuts to update the same fucking game for 13 years WEEKLY. Okay man. Whatever. Old man yelling at cloud over here. A lot of this has been building for months-years now but the Medieval Arena update really like, made it apparent to me for some reason. Maybe it’s cuz I like the update I think it’s cute I think it’s nice and small and quaint. But like— it’s So Obvious that the Medieval Arena and all its little additions and the future ones were made by a small team of people who just, wanted to have a fun Renaissance Fair in their game that they make. Bc yknow, again, they’re updating and making a game that they are paid to update and make because they want to update and make it. Sorry you don’t like shitty jousting mechanics and a cute lil fairground . Do you also hate the sun for shining? Oh you miss the old events? Oh you hate that sso is all corporate and lifeless now? Should we tell everyone? Should we invite Bella Hadid? Have you even once considered that maybe the people who make the game are People making a Game, and they can do whatever they want with their game? You, yes you, can also do whatever you want. You have the hands that create. You don’t get mad at an artist with a canvas and paints for doing art the wrong way, right? So why is it okay to get mad at an artist with a computer and a coding software for doing art the wrong way? Every horse, building, character, clothing, tack, tree, bush, boat, car, and all the hundreds of other things in this game are made by hand by dedicated people but yeah, you’re mad that they Chose To Do Something THEY Wanted To Do over doing the thirteenth birthday event in a row to appease a bunch of people who never seem to be happy with their art anyway. Fuck off. Sorry for yelling. I’m not sorry but sorry for yelling. Please die.

[castle-dominion]

castle 6x10 the good the bad & the baby

the baby lotto episode liveblog

heheheh I actually missed this one on my family watch & we had to go back afterwards to watch it.

I'm so stoked.

Loooove a good bit of christianity. The aesthetics, the folk-catholic, the goth/emo, the religious trauma, I love it sm. *dies immediately after handing a baby to the priest*

Very Castle of him. But he's right leftovers are important. Oh yeah, Pi. (Ooh audio commentary... which I've seen) lol mom Oh her dad is joining them! ... Costume? (take it in the context of the times Dom, period typical homophobia tagged on ao3 as 2007, it's ok, well it is not ok but it's fine it's fine you don't need to do anything, just be quiet, it's fine, everyone in 2023 knows that this is racist it's fine just keep watching)

Should I clip this? KB: Uh … you guys – you guys dress up for Thanksgiving? RC: (pause) Doesn’t everybody? KB: (low) No, I think that’s pretty special to you. (to CASTLE) Um … so, is there anything else I need to know about you before we get married? RC: So many, many things.

lol beckett & becket

RC: When we do this, let’s not do the dead body in the middle of the aisle.

6.30 mass? that's early af. "at the buttcrack of dawn" said my lil bro

JE: a little something something. LP *turns around with a smile & a baby* RC: A BABY!!!!? LP: A boy. I’m guessing he’s about three months. (lol no.) And he’s hungry because he keeps going after the girls. RC: Oh, who can blame him? Hi, buddy. What’s your name, little man?

rysposito arguing over lottery lol (yk what? I'll quote.) JE: his name is Cameron Ducane, 30, lived in the Bronx. There’s no baby pictures in his wallet, he’s got a commercial driver’s license, probably drives for a living. He’s got a car wash coupon– (he scoffs) – and like Ryan, spent his hard earned money on a lottery ticket. KR: (sighs) That is the Five State Magic Ball Jackpot. At $247 million you’re crazy not buying a ticket. JE: Yeah, one or two. Not fifty. KR: I’m just increasing my odds of winning. JE: You’re increasing your odds of being broke. KR: Listen, do you have any idea what it costs raising a child in New York City? JE: (shrugs) I don’t know how much it costs. I mean - KR: Of course you don’t, ‘cause you don’t - JE: I’m – RC: Guys! How about we don’t fight in front of the baby? Beckett smiles and rolls her eyes all at once.

He does call himself ruggedly handsome more than once lol. Castle is also such a dad! He sees a baby & immediately he goes from "12-year-old humour" & "15 year old who thinks he can seduce his teacher" to "DAD MODE ENABLED. OBJECTIVES: PROTECT CHILD, CLICK TONGS, MAKE JOKES."

What's his name? Julian? Love how Castle just steals him(*shrugs at beckett*) & gets ice cream. I am so glad that in the bonus features of at least one of the seasons we got to meet the "cast behind the cast" clipping

Yes he does drive for a living THAT IS A HORRIBLE SHIFT IMO. I used to work 11-19 but it was always that not 23-6...

Maybe he was thinking abt having a baby & put locks on the doors for that

I loooove this scene. They just filmed it in a car elevator. soo goood. (no-show or call in sick or smth?) (roman is very... artiulate if you know what I'm thinking about. Which you do. Why would you read my liveblog without having seen the show? unless you're reading my liveblog WHILE watching the ep but who would be doing that? I am not that popular.) Love the whistle

Ok so Roman the car service owner said that since Werid Prison Dude showed up, Cameron had been staying out all not, not coming in for his 3.00 lunch break.

That's an awesome tattoo but also it sounds like literally every tattoo. apparently this individual messed up their lines, it was supposed to be "howling at THE moon" but he said "It was pretty spectacular. It was a wolf, teeth bared, howling at a moon." & they kept it bc it was awesome beckt it is NOT specific. LOVE the outfits for ryckett, but I liked beckett's outdoor outfit better than her indoor one. Oh & esposito has bisexual clothes on (even tho it's supposed to be a classic case of dark haired gay x light haired bisexual)

If speeding tickets are on your criminal record then these detectives should get A Lot more "no record except for speeding tickets" rather than "no record"

KR: A guy takes off for work at 10PM and never arrives. And then at 6:45 the next morning he shows up shot to death at a church, holding someone else’s baby. What the hell happened in those 8 hours? That's the point of the episode babe

BECKETT shakes her head. The elevators dings and they turn to see CASTLE walking in, the baby in this arms. A UNIFORM (Julian?) follows him, his hands FULL of baby stuff. CASTLE waves. KB: Hey. So … that’s a couple of things? (ryan's big smile when castle comes in) RC: Yeah. I just grabbed the essentials. You know, diapers, a carrier, wipes, blankies, bottles, formula. Didn’t want little Cosmo going hungry. (Older brother's horror game player: B'by!! Baby! ... The ba,bey!) uwu castle dressed him up like a turkey! KB: I’m suddenly getting a clear and frightening visual as to what my future will look like. so she is planning on having kids.

KR: Hey, Castle. …um, mind if I hold him? It’ll be good experience for me. RC: Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Ready? KR: Yeah He passes RYAN the baby. As soon as the baby leaves CASTLE’S arms, he starts to fuss. (because the film team had quadruplets & each baby had a different specialty. This baby hated being on their back so they would start crying. Coincidentally, Seamus Dever was holding them so the camera could see them which just so happened to be a position that the baby hated so they started to cry as soon as he held them.) RC: Hold his head, there. KR: I know. RC: Hold him up under his – KR: I know. The baby keeps fussing. KR: Um… he’s crying. What am I doing wrong? RC: Just try to remain calm. They can sense fear. (like bees, dogs, & bread dough) KR: This is not at all like the practice doll. The baby continues to cry and CASTLE makes a face. Finally RYAN breaks and hands him back to CASTLE. KR: I thought I was ready. Clearly I am not. (aside) Oh God, I’m not ready. Poor man XD, but also NOBODY is ready for a baby. (clipping)

I'm the baby whisperer!!!

RC: Want to hold him? Her smile falls. KB: Uh, no. I’d rather figure out where he came from. RC: Well, when a man – (Sex? I’ll explain how that works later.) KB: Stop. Stop. I know where babies come from, Castle. Just not this one. She heads for her desk. RC: I can’t believe you don’t want to hold the baby. Everyone wants to hold the baby. JE: I don’t want to hold that baby. (THAT baby XD) (tbh I could clip that one phrase) RC: shrugs.

Jimmy Wolfinsky, aka Jimmy the Wolf. Good name, good tat. That sketch has a slightly too strong chin

RC: So it’s a tale of betrayal and revenge. Cameron abandons his partner Jimmy he comes down, leaving him to take the fall. Ridden with remorse, Cameron tries to put it all behind him, start life anew. But surprise, surprise. *cameral looking at ryan from the baby's POV* RC: Jimmy made parole after spending seven long years thinking of ways to make his partner pay. I like the "chorus" shakespeare bonvolio moments where people recap what has been going on in hte ep. Makes it make sense for me. But I thought cam told his wife everything & wouldn't keep secrets like extra marital babies & presumably bank robbery

Clip the jacket toss? Maybe they don't know he's gone, just like the lightbulb len episode (not relevant to anything but remember when castle was like "alexis doesn't think loving ashley at college is practical but she needs to love him anyway" & now with pi he's like "don't you dare effing move out") clipping lanie baby talk to for sure

LP: Well, whatever happened happened near that church. She drops her jacket on a chair. KB: Lanie, what are you doing here? LP: I had some information and I thought I’d come by and check on my little patient. (she bypasses them completely and picks the baby up from the pack and play) Hey little doodlebug. How’re you doing? KB: What makes you think Cameron was shot near the church? LP: Well, based on the nature and the severity of the wounds, your victim maybe had only five or ten minutes before he bled out. RC: He couldn’t have driven that far. LP: Twenty blocks at most. I also found something unusual under his fingernails. [In baby voice] Wax residue, charred nitrocellulose, and camphor. Despite her rundown of the facts, she more interested in the baby. KB: Nitrocellulose? LP: Yes. It’s used to make celluloid. You can find it in old filmstock, certain kinds of plastic, but it’s highly flammable. (she goes back to the baby) Isn’t it? RC: Charred celluloid? Where would that come from? LP: Beats me. That’s your job. Right now my job is to play with the little baby. Yes it is. LP continues to bounce the baby. KB smiles.

Ryan no you are embarrassing me & I'm just watching the show. JE: Yeah, this is Detective Esposito. I need to put out a BOLO on a Jimmy Wolfins- (he pauses when he sees a man walking toward him) Never mind. I think I found him. should I clip the oblivious ryan + fight scene esposito? lil bro said yes

INT – TWELFTH PRECINCT OBSERVATION ROOM RC: is in the room, holding the baby. They’re watching JIMMY through the glass. RC: See that man? That is a bad man. He’s gonna confess and we’re going to know just who you are. The baby coos in his arms. KR: walks in. KR: Castle? Mind if I try again? RC: Course. Here you go. He hands the baby over, and just like last time the baby immediately starts to fuss. RC: makes a face and KR: starts to panic. He hands the baby back. KR: I’ll just … wait outside. RC: No problem. KR: sighs as he backs out the door. He can’t even come up with an excuse. RC: (low, to the baby) You did that on purpose, didn’t you? High five. (the baby hits his palm) Good job.

RC: That’s a grownup lying. (low) Get used to that.

I like the wolf. Not ratting on his partner even tho the man abandoned him in the bank job.

JW: Because … I don’t know, when I was convicted I may have told some folks that Cam would pay. But that was years ago. (they’re silent) Look, the truth is, I was the one who messed up that day. I got hung up inside. Cam waited as long as he could. Longer than he should’ve. I told him that. He knew we were square. Good on them tbh

You're out of the house before 7? I mean I used to have to catch my bus for culinary school at 6.00...

Love seeing Gates be normal Gates not "iron gates".

KB: Castle, we were strangers until this morning. but you were only strangers until this morning! Consistency is important for kids! In the face of that face XD

One of our own sjfhdsjksdjklj

lunch HOUR? He works 7 hours & one of those hours is his lunch?

I had never heard the term blotter in this context before this fandom. KR: Nope, only three men and a mustang.

Wait how do-- right the footage. We saw the footage at 4.12 & mass was at 6.30.

Files, information, bank transfer numbers... they don't need to physically steal stuff b'y. Yeah bro if they got in you need to know how they did & where your security failed.

RC: A heist where nothing was taken. Maybe this is a classic ‘no honor among thieves’ situation. You know, a heist goes wrong, they fight. (reminds me of 2x21) RC: A not-so-classic no honor among thieves situation? KB: Where someone gets shot running away with a baby?

aaaaaaaaah def clipping

KR: I mean, earlier just got me thinking. Our baby’s due in a month and I can’t stop it. What if I’m really not ready? JE: Well, you’re not ready. KR: What?? JE: (shrugs) Nobody is. Look, being a dad is like being a cop. No matter what they teach you in the academy, you learn on the streets. You did okay with that, right? KR: Uh :| …my first day I was so nervous I rear ended the spot man and the guys in vests poured out ready to take me out with extreme prejudice. JE: JE: Well … you care. That already makes you a hundred times better than the dad I had. KR: [watches him for a second] (the man took you to baseball games between the ages of 3 & 5 at least...) also wow a month! The next episode is when the baby is born btw.

Typically I hear Beckett call him Espo the most. love his scarf btw

Castle can tell by the smell it was recent? A DIAPER!!! Poor baby, possibly witnessed someone get shot

I love rysposito just chatting in the background (saying goodnight & leaving in "we"s bc caskett are going home together but girl that also implies rysposito are going home together)

You are correct, he is NOT a bad guy. My man used to be a getaway driver but then he got out of the life bro. He's trying to save this baby from whoever is out there shooting ppl! actually that makes me think. Why didn't cosmo cry when cameron handed him to the priest?

Lol he's the baby whisperer. I mean yeah! Castle raised Alexis! "officially remains custody of the nypd" I used to dislike self-insert fanfiction but uh heheh technically custody of the nypd babes. & he's right! He DOES have all the stuff!

"wanna have a baby with me?" XD It'll be fun! cut to: this is SO not fun!

I love how Baby Whisperer is capitalized Them is so much faster to say but at least the book didn't say "it" (also heck yeah caskett moments) just has an exercise ball cream of mushroom soup babes HAS SHE STILL NOT HELD THE BABY? *holding him at arms length* "I hate that blanket" KB: We’re going on the nasty blanket. Yeah. Like a surgery lol. Castle really is a dad. Love the music *just not showing anything lol, rly good for filming bc they don't need to be in front of the camera* (the music heehee)

RC: All right. Now all we have to do is get him to sleep. Oh no

Martha was ALSO a single parent! The door opens and ALEXIS CASTLE walks in. Her eyes widen when she sees CASTLE and BECKETT rumpled on the couch and MARTHA happily feeding a baby. AC: How long have I been gone?

The elevator dings and CASTLE and BECKETT step off. They both have coffee but they both look bone tired. KB: Coffee’s not even helping. RC: I’d forgotten about this part. They sluggishly head for her desk. KR: Whoa. (really good "woah" from him) You two look like you got hit by the milk truck. CASTLE gestures to his face. RC: You see this face? This is the face of your future. (not clipping) JE: That bad, huh? RC: No, no, no. We slept like babies. KB: Yeah, up every hour. KR: Where is the little guy? KB: Martha and Alexis offered to babysit him. (Is that allowed? they r not the nypd?) KB: They said they were going to make a day out of it. (she tries to focus on work) So .. where are we on … um … JE, who has also basically adopted people: Child services? KB: … child services.

Nooooo did the baby's relative DIE???

KB: Uh, given how much baby garbage we generated in just one night and given how quickly they cleaned and vacated that apartment after the shooting, I’m wondering where all their garbage went. JE: raises his eyebrows. It’s a new angle. EXT – NEW YORK CITY ALLEYWAY (they've filmed in this alley before /neu) RC is digging through a dumpster. KB pops up next to him. (nice jackett btw) RC: You always take me to the most exotic places. KB: If you didn’t want to jump in your could have waited on the side like you usually do. Her teasing is good-natured. RC: What? After the puke storm I put you through last night? It felt wrong not to participate. KB: Yeah. RC: Which, by the way, you were great last night. KB: (smiles) Thank you. You weren’t so bad yourself. RC: Well, I was no baby whisperer. (she laughs) You know, I’ve gotta say, when I volunteered to take Cosmo I – I thought I was doing it for his benefit, but … I realized I was doing it more for mine. I – when Alexis was little Meredith wasn’t really around, so I – I did it all on my own. And … when you said you weren’t a baby person … KB: Ah, okay. Okay, I get it. You were thinking that … RC: (nods) Yeah. KB: Well, tell you what. When the time comes, there’s no way I’m going to let you take care of our baby on your own. She smiles and he smiles back. They lean in for a kiss. (“it’s just weird” -rc in reference to kissing in front of a dead body) KR: Hey guys! They pull back. KR holds up a bag triumphantly. (also if u look in the background esposito is peeing against the wall. Remember s1 with the nanny when castle asked where detectives go to the washroom?) KR: I’ve got something. (lil bro: "it's a couch! for my apartment!" dumpster divin', dumpster kevin...) He jumps out and runs to show them. KR: Diapers. The same kind that Cosmo was wearing when we found him. RC: The cheap, un-biodegradable kind? Now that’s just criminal.

Ryan canonically knows abt wine then? he mentioned if he won the lottery (before he had a baby) thet he'd buy a winery & farm, he's impressed by argon canisters... JE: They were lighting pin opng balls on fire??? RC: *you're right that's a college party trick*

KB: Okay, a wine preservation kit, a missing baby, and a heist where nothing was taken. I mean, each time we find a piece of this puzzle it makes less and less sense.

ryan embarrassing moments:

RC: There’s something we’re missing. Something that – There’s commotion from out in the bullpen. KR pulls a chair over to the TV. KR: It’s time! It’s time! RC: - something that’ll make the pieces fit. They head out to see what’s really going on. JE shakes his head. INT – TWELFTH PRECINCT BULLPEN KR: Quiet everyone. It’s starting! KR hands a few tickets to his coworkers. (BRO???) JE: Wow man, how many of these things did you buy – KR pushes his finger against JE’S lips to get him to stop talking. KR: Shhh. Baby needs an education. Officer Harrison.

RC: Right. The break in where nothing was stolen? Ping pong balls, wax, gas? You guys, it makes perfect sense. They fixed the lottery. The crowd mumbles. RYAN looks at the TV in disbelief before ripping his tickets in half and tossing them in the air. (at the desks now) RYAN groans, his head in his hands, shaking, BECKETT'S hand rests on his shoulder. Except how would they get them in ORDER?

the winning the lottery joke was not good

Oh no the husband is probably the one who got shot!

ok but is that the third briefcase from the end or the third briefcase from the leftmost one? what if you're doing double inclusive counting? double exclusive counting? I'm really bad at this sort of thing Benny was crying? Benny was there? no wait that was yesterday not today Why would gates ask beckett what would happen to Paul Vail? She's the captain here babes

Corner after corner walk & talk

Caskett finishing each other's sentences lol RC: They’re not leveraging him. He’s in on it. Yeah lol acab

Ooh the way the music stopped when she put down the phone? so good

They just have him in the car service location? Ok so sometimes they show up & start yelling from a distance, other times they sneak up on em. What's the difference?

Oh the reunion!

VG: Nicely done. KB: Thanks. But uh … Cam is the real hero here. VG: The getaway driver? RC: Yeah. Turns out it was a case of honor among thieves. JE: Yeah. Paul told us the whole story. KB: When Cam’s boss, Roman, found out about his past, he pressured Cam into the job and threatened to fire him if he didn’t go along. RC: It was going to destroy everything he and his wife were trying to build. (all four of them are doing the finishing sentences thing) JE: Roman promised no one would get hurt, but then after the ball exchange at the TV station, Cam overheard Roman and Walter Dennis talking. They whole leaving the country thing was bull. They never had any intention of letting the Vails live. KR: Yeah. After collecting the winnings, they were going to stage an accident, killing them all. VG: Silencing the only witnesses to their crime. KB: nods. RC: When Cam found out, he couldn’t live with that. PAUL: He tried to save us both, but they caught him. So he grabbed Benny and ran. (to MIRANDA) He gave up his life for us.

Baby! Love his hat btw

KR: Well, the good news is, I mean, besides saving that family, they are rolling over the lottery. So I’ve got another shot at that $247 million. All I’ve got to do is tape my tickets back together. JE: Oh … dude. (KR stops) They uh … they already took out the trash. KR stops for a seconds, then turns and bolts out the door, almost running into someone in the process. After he’s gone, JE starts to laugh. He pulls KR's tickets from his pocket. JE: It’s– I’m just going to let him swim around in a dumpster for like a hour, then I’m going to pull him out. XD what a dick but it's funny

AC: Hey, if you guys have kids in a few years, and I have kids in a few years, they can grow up together. RC: RC: And … it’s ruined. Bestie the turkey should have already been out of the freezer those things take forever to thaw. I missed a day of culinary school. & was screwed. Also, like??? just break it down? Different parts of the carcass have different cooking times. Break it down & then cook them so that you have them all perfectly done instead of some overcooked some still half-raw

Love Martha's outfit (her braids are not nearly tight enough tho) *don't talk about it don't talk about it don't talk about it don't talk about it hhhhhhhhhhhh* where's Jim? I'm glad that thought distracted me. Also yeah I totally believed the castle family would do that. but why did SHE get castle's outfit? if she thought castle was being srs & would have his own?

So yeah I really really loved this episode! Minus the fact that I'm FNMI ofc.

So there IS an audio commentary of this but idk if it would be worth liveblogging.