#<- that's how i'll tag this thing from now on
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egg-deviled · 2 days ago
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hehehe blog introductory post
(am i doing this right?)
soooo I figured that I should do this since I have followers and mutuals now lol
ANyyywayyyyy
You guys can call me whatever you want, i guess? you can correlate a nickname with my URL but you don't have to, if you're uncreative just call me like, egg, or something
my age is in my bio but if you don't feel like straining your eyes to look at that i was born the same year that pluto was demoted from planethood (rip)
Things I post:
reblogs of things i find funny
reblogs of things that are cool/ interesting to me
reblogs of art i like
reblogs of poetry
my own random shitposts
my art (lie) [fun fact i used to have an alt art acc but i think i got rid of it]
my own poetry
me just... talking?
answering asks if i get them lol
queer shit
things that i think are important
weird things (yes very specific i am aware)
Miku Binder Thomas Jefferson (any chance I get)
Things I dont post:
Hate Speech (against ANYONE)
Fundraisers or reblogs of posts asking for money (because idk how to check if they're scams or not)
Overly sexual content (I will make suggestive jokes sometimes but i won't post anything nsft on this blog, ESPECIALLY since there are minors who follow me)
literally anything I wouldn't say in real life
exposing anyones info or secrets
AI Generated anything (i am an ai hater frrrrr)
List of things im intooooooo:
Percy Jackson & the Olympians + anything affiliated
Hamilton
women
Ride the Cyclone
Hatsune Miku
women
Epic the Musical
Weirdcore
Analog horror
tall skinny nerdy men
cats (just in general, not cats the musical)
The Amazing Digital Circus ( however i am a jax hater)
Miraculous Ladybug
women
Taylor swift (fav album is midnights, pls dont be a hater about me being a swiftie 😭)
surrealism
dark romanticism (as in like that genre of literature in the 19th century not the romanticized sexual assault in modern "dark romance" books)
poetry
greek mythology
mythology in general
the world wars
the cold war
espionage
Gravity Falls
women
art
funny memes
jokes about past history events i shouldn't be joking about (like presidential assasinations, etc)
Steven Universe
Marvel (my favorites are wanda cause of her character and bucky because he's lowk fine)
Star Wars (hardly ever post abt it though)
history stuff in general
butterflies
did i mention I like women?
my wife (a whole man btw)
anyyyyywayyyyyyyyyyyyy
I'm gonna add on to this with a list of all the things i use to tag my stuff, it's mainly for me to reference to so i can find my damn posts, but everyone can use it lolllll
If there's anything abt me that you still want to know my asks are open and I'll answer if it's reasonable :)))))))))))
inside of you there are two intestines.
one of them is large, and the other is small.
34K notes · View notes
ziminy · 3 days ago
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I'll follow you until you love me
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Having actor Gojo as your fan isn't for the weak
Tags: smut, mdni, f!actress reader, actor!Gojo, dark themed, stalking, obsession, jealousy, fan boy Gojo, mind games, lots of lies, manipulation, panties stealing, making out, fingering, oral (f receiving), drunk s(e)x, dubious content, people are shipping you and Gojo, fear play, just me going over the top again,
Author's note: thank you for 100 flowers 🤗 I been working on this fic for a while and was waiting for a specific occasion to post it.
Masterlist
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The first time Gojo Satoru heard about you was a long time ago. He doesn't really remembers the details but he knows he was so done with hearing about you left and right.
Everybody was praising this new actor who appeared out of a blue, and it was getting on his nerves.
Nothing was known about you, you had no connections to the inside world, your name wasn't affiliated with any big names. It was like you were put on the big screen out of nowhere and lend a big role like the director was forced to.
And his feelings only got bitter the moment he met you in person. Walking into his set one day and greeting everyone left and right, remembering names of some crew members he didn't knew they even existed to begin with.
But the cherry on top was when the director, that was known for being a bit too eccentric, presented you with the biggest smile on. Praising you and talking about how the day is so much better with you there. And you, instead of trying to show off, being humble.
He didn't like it. The way you looked so sweet, how you would laugh at the poorly made jokes and how you left just as soon as you appeared, giving him no chance to actually learn something about you. But he does remember how you promised to buy everybody a drink next time you pass by and how you look forward to his movie.
Another one of his fans? Huh? He thought, being disappointed that you'd be much more easier than he hoped.
But he only ended up being disappointed once again, because a week later you appeared on his set one more time. This time with drinks just as you promised, and the biggest smile on your face talking about the role you're auditioning for and how the set is closer to his. Well, you weren't talking to him directly, but the director. But since you were on his movie set you were practically sets neighbors.
Full of himself, he went to you, expecting you to be excited and faint just from seeing him, since you said you were a fan. But instead you looked at him the way you looked at everybody else, the same business smile on that was basically your free pass card in life. Refusing his invitation to drink with him tonight, talking about keeping it professional and how you don't dare to accept since you respect him too much. Fearing that you might do something that would embarrass yourself in front of him.
It was a lie, he quickly noticed the way your face change as you left with your assistant. A blank expression on your face, that smile disappearing, not having to put an act on as you thought no one saw you. But he did, and it got him thinking, spending the next few days searching and looking at any media form that haves your name on it.
Were you actually pretending? Was everybody's sweetheart actually a liar? Did he actually found dirt on you? What is he going to do with this information? Surely you don't want everybody to know about about it, right?
But when he thought he had you, a scandal with your name all over it was the only thing everybody was talking about. How your company was mistreating you and how you finally managed to break ties with them. And it didn't helped that everybody on his set was whining about you not asking for help, and how they noticed your sudden demeanor but didn't said a thing.
Now you had people fighting over you to join entertainment companies. Biggest names arguing about which one was better for you, you even had his company begging you to join them. And now he was stuck with hearing your name once again.
It didn't stopped any time soon, because somehow, miraculously, you decided to sign a contract with his company.
It was like you decided to torture him, play with his mind and lead him on even if you clearly set some boundaries between the two of you. Were you playing hard to get? Because after all those nights awake he learned that you didn't get involved with anyone in the industry. You refused executives after executives, big actors and renowned directors. You would rather get banned from the industry than being known for giving any kind of services or being known as someone's partner.
He didn't knew if he was supposed to be proud or get mad at how stupid you were acting.
But it got him even more invested. And now you had him watching every single thing you appeared in. It could be a small role, you could just appear in the background for a second and he'll memorize the entire movie.
Soon he got bored of that, and he moved into interviews, appearances or just people speculations, the nda you sign or make people sign. He still remembers about that time you got a nobody as your partner and kept him around for a few months. Even so, it didn't changed a thing about his interest in you.
His room was filled with you, pictures, posters, stuff from movies you acted in. His whole house was like this in fact. His closet filled with stuff you wore, you could even find the same products you use in his bathroom.
And the less attention you pay him, the more obsessed he became. Spraying his bed with your perfume every time you went on a date with your little nobodies, sometimes even asking people from your sets about you, not daring to get to close to you so you won't acknowledge him, even if he's dying to get your attention.
Imagine his surprise when you first acted in the same thing. Well, not really because he auditioned for the same movie as you, trying for a role that had it's screentime at the same time as yours. But he didn't really expect to get it. Oh who is he lying to? He called the director and demanded to play by your side, talking about how he wants to try new things and putting a act on so nobody would rat him out.
Just as soon as the roles were revealed to the public, he even hired a few people to post about the two of you online. But he did got hit by surprise from the amount of people that actually shipped you two. It got him giggling and kicking his feet, staying up and reading comments about how you looked together.
And you seemed to feed into fans delusions, interacting with him more and putting on a more friendly facade, like you were actually friends behind close doors.
Even if it was fake, he liked it. The attention you gave him, the way you finally look at him right in the eyes with more than just your business smile. How you sit close to him at interviews, your legs almost touching. And how you would joke with him when people were looking, actually trying to get to know him.
The promotions ended sooner than he'd like, and now he was alone once again.
He should have let go of you, it been already two years since you two acted together, and he did in fact almost forgot about you. His house was finally you free, not a single thing that represented you in any way in sight. And he been clean for the past few months, finally going in public and acting like old him.
That was until a movie director contacted him, wanting him to be one of the main characters in this action movie he's making. And his costar? You. You would play his love interest. He can't really remember what he said after that, but he did ended up with the role, now reading the script with great attention, trying to picture how your scenes would be.
The romance scenes weren't enough, the fans would want to see more, he said while talking to the director, convincing him to add more. And that's how you ended up with some really unnecessary spicy scenes. Making out in the bathroom, somehow fucking each other on his bed, lots of kisses and the sexual tension should be felt the entire movie.
"Director, can I talk to you?" you said when you visit the set for the first time.
"Did something happen?" the older man looked at your concerned face.
"I received the new script." you said, holding the papers in your hands. "Are all the new scenes really necessary? It's supposed to be about fighting for justice, not a romance movie." well, you were right. But the white haired man happened to pay for the movie's budget out his own pocket.
"It would reach to a larger audience." but were the sex scenes really necessary? You looked at Gojo, trying to communicate telepathically with him. "Don't worry, I'm sure everything will be fine." the director said, ending the discussion there.
This wasn't just about you, it was also about your coworker and about how he feels. You had to pull him to the side and talk to him, you didn't want any hard feelings or to end up with a twisted relationship because of a stupid movie. "You sure you're alright with the new scenes?" you asked, looking at the tall man as he seemed to hold back something.
"Yes. Why wouldn't I?" he tried not to smile, happy at the way you seemed concerned about him and his well being.
"The change was out of nowhere and too drastic. I could talk to the director if you feel uncomfortable." you're so cute, he wanted to eat you whole.
"What about you. How do you feel about it?" he knew he went overboard, he blacked out when he made those changes after all. But he personally can't say that he regrets anything.
"It's just acting. Sure, I'm a little unhappy at the changes, but I'm alright with it if you are." god, he was dying to kiss you. He wanted to get to the parts where he could be closer to you, feel your skin against his and have a taste of your lips.
There were a few more weeks of filming until he got to the parts he wanted, and he was waiting patiently. Because he knew that once it started he'll get more than enough of you.
"That's all for today." the director said, finally announcing that it was the end of today's work.
"How about some drinks?" Gojo looked at you talking to your assistant before he looked at the director. "My treat." how could anybody refuse free drinks, especially ones that were payed by the white haired man.
You initially tried to refuse, looking at your assistant for a confirmation before you accepted. And that's how you ended in a bar with almost everybody on the set.
You let yourself to get losen for once, forgetting about the image you carefully builded and drank. You had your assistant there in case of anything, which you trusted a bit too much. But even so, you're just happy that you could drink, enjoy the company of others and feeling like you're just another person in there not just a big name actress.
And perhaps you enjoyed yourself a bit too much. Because people started leaving and you didn't felt like doing the same just yet.
It was just you, your costar, the director and your assistants in there in the end, it wasn't that bad.
"I'll call the car for us." your assistant let you know as they stepped outside for a moment.
"Our car is here." the director's assistant said, making the old man get up and leave. Now it was just you, your costar and his assistant that was nowhere to be seen.
"I'm kinda glad I'm doing this with you." you said, barely able to keep your eyes open. "I hear people talking about you all the time, and they all say how good you are." he stared at you with an expressionless face, still trying to think of what he should do next.
"Why don't we go outside for a moment? Take some fresh air." he wasn't prepared for a love confession just yet.
"Alright." you grabbed his arm, letting your body lean into his. He was sweating, his heart was beating so fast that he doesn't know what to do.
"T-then." he gulped, walking with you towards the back door of the bar. Good thing he reserved the whole place, because he doesn't know what he would have done if anyone saw you in that situation.
He placed you against the wall, sitting back next to you and letting you rest your head against his shoulder.
"Your hands are so big." you said, taking his hand in yours and comparing sizes. He was quiet, he just stared at you, his mind in a million places as he tried to figure out if this was some kind of hint or it was all in his head. "You're big in general." you looked up at him, blinking a few times and making him look away, a hand over his face as he tried to control his facial expression.
"It's nothing." he almost bite his tongue.
"I was a bit scared at first, but I'm glad we're in this together." seriously, are you trying to provoke him? "Let's work together in the future as well." if you weren't leading him on then he doesn't know what this is.
The way you look at him, and how you smile. It wasn't your work smile, you were genuinely smiling at him, heck, even your eyes were smiling. If this wasn't you telling him how much you want him then he really went crazy.
He lowered his head, taking another look at your face before he kissed you. At first it was something simple, just his lips touching yours for a second before he backed away. But the way you looked at him made him get closer. Those eyes of yours, having something that looked like sparkles in them. A fire that never seems to calm down, the heat that made him fall for you in the first place. Who can blame him that he kissed you again? Trapping your body against the wall, making you to wrap your hands around him, welcoming him in your warmth even more.
He let out a moan, looking at you with something lustful in his eyes and a smirk on his face. He looked dangerous, like he finally let go of that prince charming facade, showing you what he actually is.
You looked surprised, like you actually never expected him to act like that. Did you really thought that he's usually that sweet? How cute. He could play with you for a little longer, show you what he's actually capable of.
He bite your lip, looking straight into your soul as his kisses traveled to your neck. He sucked on your skin, placing a soft kiss on it before he sinked his teeth into it, making you to let out a gasp. He needed to leave his mark on you, because who knows when else he could.
He couldn't stay away from your lips for long, and now he's back on devouring you, filling the back alley with the sounds you make. "Come home with me." he tried to say, not wanting to get away from you.
You didn't respond, not because you didn't heard him, because trust me when I say you heard him loud and clear. It was more about what will happen after that, and your moral code. You'd rather die than get involved with anyone in the industry, and yet look at you still refusing to let go of him.
"Y/N, you're here?" you could hear somebody on the other side of the door. It was your assistant, probably looking for you to go home.
"Let go." you quietly moaned into his mouth. The door open, making you to push him away, looking at your assistant who had no clue of what's going on. "Is the car ready?" you felt like you sobber up, it's like you didn't touched a single drop of alcohol.
"It just arrived." your assistant looked at the actor next to you and then at you, not knowing if they should walk away or take you to your car.
"Alright." you left him in that alley, not even looking back at him for a single moment.
He had that look again, he's about to do something you'd both regret, or more like you won't like it. Because if he's shameless enough to do it, do you think he'd actually feel a little bit of remorse?
The next day you woke up with hundreds of text and missed calls, and your head killing you. And when you looked at your phone all you could see is people sending you the same article.
Two big stars making out in the back of a bar. Is this the start of a romance story?
Huh? What are these people talking about? Curious, and having no idea why people were sending it to you, you clicked on it. And you were welcomed with your name all over it, alongside Gojo's.
All you can do is cry. How drunk were you last night? You have to apologize to your costar. How could you have been so stupid? You can't believe yourself for doing such a mistake.
"Do not believe everything you see" you posted something on your social media. Trying to calm down the crowd somehow. You have to talk to your team about this since you have absolutely no idea how to handle it. For the moment it it was better to deny it then resolve this issues with Gojo's team.
Speaking of the wolf, you haven't checked on his social media yet.
You went on his profile, and instead of trying to take control over the situation he was putting more wood on the fire.
"Since everybody knows we don't have to hide anymore" you looked at his post in disbelief.
"???" you comment. Looking at your screen in disbelief at the way he was liking comments about how the two of you looked good together.
"Hi :)" he replied to your comment, making you even more confused. Was this a strategy for the movie? I mean, it wasn't a bad idea since you are his character's love interest.
Perhaps this was all an elaborate scheme that you weren't aware of just yet. That thought made you calm down. The internet was doing otherwise.
There were people who were genuinely happy about this, talking about how they knew it. Hell, you got other stars talking about how they always seen your interactions and they knew something more was going on. The fact that you didn't seen a single hate comment made you put questions, but who knows. You might see them sooner or later.
From that moment on, you didn't had a single peaceful time on set. Now you have people acting like your a married couple when nothing was going on between you and Satoru. But he seemed fine, in fact, he looked happy with the way people are treating you now.
He left his mark on you and you didn't even knew it. It was fine, even if you didn't looked at him as a potential partner, yet. It was alright. There was more than enough time. There's no rush, especially when he knows how to get rid of competition. Just like he got rid of your assistant for interrupting you at the bar, he can get rid of everybody that dares to get in his business.
"You're free later?" he came to you when you were on set, making people start whispering between themselves and giggle.
"Not really." you looked tired, if he knew you'd end up like this without an assistant he would have got you another one first.
"If you ever need my help let me know, I'll help you with anything." he means it, even if he looks like he doesn't. He will walk through fire if you tell him to.
"I'm just looking for a new assistant, don't worry." people were speculating that the assistant was the one who leaked about your so called relationship, but it was far from the truth. But the fact that they refuses to talk to you was confusing, even if it was your assistant who did that, why would they suddenly quit and go no contact? And what was more confusing was the fact that the only text from them was a screenshot of what you posted. Don't believe everything you see. What does that means? Was somebody bullying them? Then why wouldn't they tell you?
Now you couldn't help but be hesitant about chosing a new assistant. What if they end up having the same fate? Some people can be really mean and you don't want anyone to suffer because of you.
So, for the next few days you refused to even talk about your current situation. Only having your manager by your side and not trusting anyone that got too close near you.
He haves a limit, you should know that. How much longer he should wait for you to finally notice him?
This only made someone jealous, and a little angry. You don't want his help, even after what happened at the bar, you act like there was nothing you should talk about.
You should have went to him, jump in his arms and cry about how your assistant left you. But no, instead you chose to overwork yourself, still be the same kind actress that people loved and still giving him no attention.
So, he wrote you a letter. It was nothing more than his current thoughts and about his not so healthy love that was masked as 'admiration'. Shoving into your bag when no one was looking.
You were still on set when you were reading the letter, thinking it was made by one of the staff who happened to be your fan. You didn't really payed too much mind about it, finding it cute and putting it back where you find it after you were done with it.
Did you liked it? Should he write another one? Or did he went too overboard?
Do not believe everything you see, those were your own words and yet you were ignoring them. That letter did made your day, thinking that maybe you're just overthinking about your current situation. There were bad people out there, but there were also good guys. Why were you letting one bad incident ruin your mood?
A few days later you appeared at the studio with an unknown person next to you, you finally got a assistant. And this time you're planning on doing better than you did last time. Or so you thought.
You woke up with another letter, the same handwriting and the same sweet words written on it. This time was more about you than your so called fan, about how you should take more care of your health, how you got people worrying about you. But unlike last time, this letter had a signature on it, an S, nothing more, just a simple symbol.
How cute, S for secret, right? You giggled.
Do not believe everything you see. Really, do not. But for a moment you allowed yourself to be delusional, to think that the world wasn't that bad. I mean, even if there was someone who didn't appreciate you, you still had millions of fans and there are a lot of people who supports you.
And you decided to be more humanitarian, to step up your game and follow your costar's lead. One time after everyone was done with work you announced that you want to take everyone out for drinks, your treat. No one was crazy enough to refuse, especially you.
So, you called a friend of yours who owned a restaurant, the food is great, plus they also had a bar. And off you were.
Just like last time, you ended up all alone in that place with your coworker, laughing at his silly jokes before you finally got up to pay for tonight's feast.
"Your back?" you asked, feeling someone behind you and thinking it was your assistant. But to your surprise, it wasn't. It was the white haired man who seemed drunk, and maybe he was from the few drinks he had that night.
He leaned into you, trapping you between the empty receptionist desk and him. He kept looking at you, eyes half open as he seemed to want to say something.
Your mind was wandering for a moment, moving your eyes on his full lips before looking up at him. Every sane person would have done that, I mean, he was eye catching even in that state.
"You're alright?" you sounded concerned, and for a moment he actually thought you cared about him. You looked around the empty room for a moment, looking for any other people in there, but for his assistant more specifically.
"Don't leave me." he got his face closer to your ear, whispering in a low voice, and placing his hands on either sides of your body, trying to get his body more closer to yours.
"Come." you tried to get on of his hands away, so you could move.
"Where?" he only got clingier.
"Let's sit down. I'll get you some water." the last thing you want to see is headlines with your name all over them, talking about taking advantage of him when he's such a state.
"Noo." he whined, resting his head against your shoulder. "Don't want to." you sighed, looking around the room once again, trying to see if anyone from his team is still there.
"I got the bill ready." the cashier came back, only to freeze in place and look at you and your costar hugging, or what it seemed like a hug.
"I'll pay for it as soon as my assistant comes back." you said, trying to act like you're not being suffocated by this mountain of a man. The poor girl ran back from where she came from, leaving you alone with Satoru again. You sighed, you could only sigh as you put a hand on his back, making him break character for a moment as he jolted under your touch. "You can be such a big baby sometimes." good thing that you can't see him, because he was grinning from ear to ear.
"What happened to you?" your assistant finally appeared, looking at the scene you two were putting.
"He's drunk." you said as you rubbed his back with one hand, the other resting on his side, to keep him in place from falling. "Have you seen his assistant?"
"Not since the director left." your assistant got their phone out. "I'll give them a call." you're so thankful that you overcame your fears, because you don't know what you would have done alone in a moment like this. "They turned their phone off." you looked at the man in your arms and shook your head, disappointed at how this turned out.
"Call his manager, or anyone from his team." maybe he was the one who needed a new assistant, not you.
"No one is answering their phone." you understand that it's late at night, but who could just leave a big movie star like Gojo out here without a single thought about it. "What do we do? There's a hotel nearby, we could get a room for him there." that wasn't a bad idea. However, neither you or your assistant would look good if you leave him there. I mean, someone will have to get in the hotel with this world famous actor, who's face is known by everybody. He clearly drunk, and there would 100% be someone who will post something online about it and you'll get backlash for it.
"Let's take him to my place." that was the only option you had left. He started rubbing his face against you when you said that, letting out a groan and letting more of his weight into you.
"You're sure about that?" your assistant asked, not sure how to respond to what you just said.
"He'll sleep in a guest room. It's better than a hotel." your imagine had to come first after all.
So, without any more words said, you took him to your car. Even if he was heavy, he was surprisingly easy to move around. Well, he did followed every single of your move voluntarily, refusing to let go of you in any way possible.
That until you got to your house, dragging him inside when your assistant left, and leading him to a room relatively far from yours.
You pushed him in bed, taking off his shoes and trying to get him comfortable in bed. You didn't even dared to get close to his clothes, just putting the blanket over him and then leaving him in there.
You didn't even thought of taking advantage of him, you just wanted him sleep peacefully, to keep him away from anyone who might do something bad to him. After all, you knew damn well the industry you're working in, they'll eat him like wolves if they get their hands on him.
You're just helping out, you don't expect anything in return. But what a surprise to wake up with him in your bed in the middle of the night. He was on top of you, looking at the way the moonlight hit your face, and somehow wanting to bathe in your scent.
You could feel his hot breath on you, and it made you woke up. You didn't looked scared, even if he looked like he wanted to do things you'd rather not think about, you stayed calm. "Why did you leave me?" was he still drunk, or perhaps he was pretending to be? He was a good actor after all, you wouldn't be surprised if this was one of his acts.
He doesn't understands you. If you were the one who jumped in his arms like that he would have devoured you alive. But even after he made sure he could get some time alone with you, you still didn't payed him attention, at all.
"Go to sleep." you looked unfazed, not even taking him seriously.
"Touch me." he was really going to lose his mind. He was serving himself on a plate to you, and you didn't even dared to take a bite.
"You're drunk." you'd always try to do the opposite of what he's saying.
"I'm not." you knew he was pretending from the start too, didn't you?
"That's what a drunk person would say." you were getting on his nerves.
In a moment of panic, he took your hand in his, kissing your palm, closing his eyes and looking desperate as he tried to show you how he's feeling. You didn't even bat an eye, looking at him expressionless and like you didn't believed a word be was saying.
"Why don't you like me?" he had to confront you, or else this will take him nowhere.
"It's not that." he got the wrong idea, but it wasn't your job to explain yourself when he only understands what he wants to understand.
"Then? Why do you keep avoiding me?" you shook your head.
"I want us to keep it professional." you're making him laugh.
"We weren't professional when we kissed." that's another story. "So you just used me and now you'll let me hanging like this?" he really didn't wanted to listen to you unless you said something he wants to hear. "Make it up to me." what a fucker. "I want something in return for what you did." he's talking like he didn't started it last time.
"What do you want me to do?" you really can't believe him and his stupid demands. This should have been a payback for last time. Taking care of him even if he wasn't your problem to begin with.
"Kiss me." he was waiting for your response. "Like you mean it." you just said you want to keep it professional, but it's like he didn't even heard it.
"Can't I do something else?"
"Post a picture of us." that was even worse. Who knows what people would say if you do that. You'd really be branded as his, and it was a pain in the ass to deal with it.
You grabbed him by his shirt and dragged him closer to you, giving him a kiss that he'd remember. A wet kiss that it filled the room with sound, and your tongue in his mouth dancing with his. You even wrapped your hands around his neck, making sure he doesn't back down and take back his words.
He moaned, his hands trying to get under your shirt to feel more of your skin. But you didn't let him to do anything because you ended the kiss, breathing heavily and looking at him a bit angrily. "What now?"
"Bite me." kissing wasn't enough, he wanted you to eat him. Bite him, devour him in any way you could so that way you could have a piece of him with you.
"I'm not-" he kissed you, this time pinning your hands above your head so he could explore you more freely. Every time you tried to say something he'd bite your lip, making you groan and continued to kiss you.
"Touch me." he moaned, finally getting his mouth away from yours so you could breath. He took his shirt off, tossing it somewhere in the room and taking one of your hands in his, placing it on his crotch so you could feel how hard he was. He looked at you, at the face you made and how you didn't looked happy to be in that situation.
"It's too soon." you still refuse to get involved with your coworkers? What does he haves to do to prove to you that he means every single word he's saying?
"Do you really not like me?" he wanted you to be at least a little interested in him. It was no fun if he's the only one with big feelings in there.
"It's not that." it's your moral code.
"Do you ever think of me?" you didn't respond to that, only looking down at your hands amd trying to avoid eye contact.
"I'm not ready." you finally open your mouth to say something. "If we do this then nothing will be the same. We still have work to do, I can't simply just do it." so it was because of work? He already knew that, but at least you didn't dislike him.
"I get it." he said, getting off you and sitting down in bed. "Just go to sleep."
"You can sleep here if you want, I'll go somewhere else." you tried to get out of bed, but he dragged you back.
"Just because we're not fucking that doesn't mean we can't sleep." he will not let this night go without doing something. And just being able to feel your body against his as he sleeps is more than enough. Trust me when I say that this will drive him crazy for many days from now on.
The way you stay in his arms, and how he's able to shield over you. You really have no idea what power you hold onto him.
Do you regret bringing him in? A little. You hate giving people false hope, and he seems to ignore all your signs of displeasure. He did grew up in this environment after all. Being rich and famous from a young age, he haves no idea how to react when people tells him no, he can't handle rejection. And it seems that he always got what he wanted.
He didn't had to put on an act if he wanted to be around you. You could be friends, if he wanted. But nothing more, you wouldn't dare to be something more than acquaintances. You just work together, and are signed under the same entertainment company. You were nothing more than cash cows. You were the biggest stars of your agency, and you seemed to be pushed under the spot light as much as possible. He must understand how you feel, no?
He in fact didn't. And unlike you, he had more control over his actions. You could even say that the agency was afraid of him. He did come from a big family of stars, he had so many connections that even he can't say for sure how much power he was holding. But it was no joke when someone says he's the strongest.
So how can you reject him like that? Leaving him alone in that bed without blinking twice. But perhaps it was for the best, because he could finally rearrange his thoughts and think of what he should do. Retreat wasn't an option, I mean, how could he step back when he basically was in paradise?
This place smells exactly like you, leaving a sweet taste on his tongue and making him salivate while bathing in your scent. Should he steal something? You shouldn't tell him twice, because he got up the bed and starting looking around the room. He should pick something small, that you wouldn't notice. And even if you do notice, what will you do? He's shameless, you'll only give him a reason to get off to later when he's alone.
He should get something practical, that would help him during hard times.
And that's when he saw it, your closet. Something in his perverted mind suddenly lit on, and he went straight for your panties. There's so many to choose from, so many colors and models. He wants to take all of them home, put them on display right at the entrance so he would be greeted by them every time he comes home. In the end he picked one of the prettiest pair you own, shoved it in his pocket and went back into your room.
He gained more than he expected. Perhaps he should play drunk more often.
He got his shirt back on and got out the room. You couldn't possibly just left him in there all alone. And he was right, because he found you in the kitchen, sitting peacefully and taking a sip of some unknown liquid from a cup. "You're up?" the way your voice was still husky, your hair messy and your shirt falling off your shoulder. You said you didn't wanted him and yet you're trying to seduce him, how does that come?
He didn't open his mouth, only getting closer to you and taking the cup away from your hand, drinking from it without a single worry of what it might be.
It was tea, not so sweet, still warm and somehow hitting just right. "If you wanted some you could have said so." you said, getting up and walking towards one of your cabinets, getting out another cup and pouring some tea in it. "Here."
"I'll drink from this." he preferred your half empty cup rather than a full one? What a weirdo.
"Do you want to eat anything? I still have some leftovers from yesterday. I also think I still have some jam left, we could eat it with toast." stop showing him your caring side. He really doesn't know for how much longer he can keep it like this. This moment felt too intimate, it felt like you two really hooked up last night, and it was messing with his head.
You take good care of him, don't you? Offering him some of the biggest clothes you own so no one would suspect a thing, giving him a ride back to the studio. And now acting like you don't even know him. Stop being so cute, it only makes him want to bite you.
"You're here today?" the director said, looking at the two of you who got there at the same time.
"Don't we need to be here for a costumes check?" you clearly remember your assistant telling you to come back and do a last minute fit check.
"It's tomorrow." the white haired man said, wrapping his arm around yours.
"Why didn't you told me?" he was enjoying this too much, all a smile as he was trying not to react at your expression.
"I thought you were taking me home." you didn't even knew where he lives.
"Just go, you love birds. You clearly have better places to be at." the director laughed, making you look in disbelief at him. Love birds? Who?
"Come on, let's go back." Satoru didn't let you say a thing and dragged you out of there.
All he needs to do at the moment is keep people away from approaching you. And it's not hard, at all. Just standing next to you, flash a smile and say something that could be interpreted in wrong ways. He doesn't even need to try to make people run.
"Seriously, why didn't you tell me?" you said when you got back to your car. "Now I look stupid." you looked so gloomy, he was going to eat the pout of yours.
"I thought you knew." he'll get you even more confused about things if it means he'll see you like this. It gave him a false sense of security, like you were finally accepting him.
You sighed, not wanting to let out your anger on him. "Let me drive you home." it would be bad if more people sees you together. And at this point you don't trust anyone to come near your home to get him.
What a joke.
The next day you woke up with people blowing your phone again, and another article of your name next to his, talking about everything you did in public. Your interactions at the bar, how he was spotted at your house where he didn't left until the next morning, and about how you always look lovey dovey at the sets.
The filming progress just started and yet there were already rumors all over the internet about how you two would end up being more than just coworkers by the end of that movie.
Who keeps writing this? Seriously, it was getting on your nerves. And the fact that Satoru kept feeding delusions to the fans wasn't helping.
All this hype around the movie wasn't supposed to be only about you two, the main cast. It was supposed to be about all the production. The set, the visuals, the acting and the script, everyone's hard work. You should have turned down the offer as soon as you heard who your costar would be. But you didn't see any of these coming, so who can you blame?
Things only seems to get worse, because when you stared filming again, you got assigned with a new task.
"So, we're filming what were doing behind the scenes?" you asked, looking at the small camera that one of your coworkers was holding and then at them.
"The director said it would be fun. Giving people a little preview of what's going on." well, it didn't sounded that bad. People seems to enjoy behind the scenes footage in general, letting them see a bit of the actors lifes.
"I see." if the director said so, then you guess you don't really have a saying in this.
"We started already?" the white haired man appeared next to you out of nowhere, resting a hand on your head and leaning into you.
"Satoru, say hi to the camera." the actor said, moving the device to his face.
"Oh right, Y/N." there was a hint of his evil plan in his voice, already knowing you'd be pissed with him. "Are my clothes still at your place? I think I forgot them there." you really couldn't control your expression in that moment, looking at him like he killed somebody.
"What?" your voice was shaking, still not over the fact that he would say something like that in this situation. "Why would they be at my house?"
"I changed there last time. I think I left the clothes on the couch before we left."
"Ohh~" the other actor said, making you to look at them, somehow begging them to not get the wrong idea. "I see you're busy. I'll let you be, I won't interact."
"No, wait. It's not what it seems." it was already too late. "Why would you say that?" because he knew the director loves drama, and this would end up being published sooner or later. He was killing two birds with one stone. Doing a favor for the movie's publicity and showing the world that he already been in places some wouldn't even dare of dreaming of.
"People love things like these." he wrapped his hands around you, resting his chin on your head. "Hug me, the camera is in our direction." if it was or not, he couldn't care less. He just wanted to feel your touch in that moment.
It only got worse and worse the moment you started filming the sex scenes. The scenes were like a reflection of your own actions in real life, because everything started with a drunk kiss at a bar. Then ending up in his apartment where you were eating each other in the hallway.
It was supposed to be acting, the kisses didn't even needed to be real and yet he's not even holding back, touching you in all kind of inappropriate places, groping you shamelessly like there aren't cameras all over the place.
He pinned you against the sturdiest wall in there, making you wrap your legs around him as he kept biting and kissing you all over the place. At this point, you don't think the editors would need any sonds effects for your scenes. Because you realized how filthy those sounds were, and loud. Every time you kissed it was echoing in that empty place, the small setting that was supposed to represent a house wouldn't be enough to muffle the sounds.
He bite your lip when he realized your head was in a complete another place. How dare you ignore him in moments like these. You couldn't run even if you wanted, because you'd have to come back to him and film everything from the start. Or perhaps he could make you screw up on purpose, to retake this scene so he could touch you even more.
"Wait." you tried to stop him when you felt his hand under your shirt, trying to unclip your bra.
"What?" he said out of breath, taking his lips away from you for a moment so he could look at you.
"Let-" you looked away, too embarrassed at the way he was looking at you, his pupils were dilated and he looked like he would really put his dick in you if it wasn't for all these people in there. "Let me do it." his lips were back on yours while his hands were trying to take your clothes off.
Both of your clothes were all over the place, and you know it would be a pain in the ass to pick them after. He was too focused on this, the way he looked like he couldn't see anyone but you, like you were really alone in his house.
That's the beauty of acting, no? How some could get so focused on the plot, acting like their character is supposed to and forgetting about the outside world. But he wasn't acting in that moment. Maybe you were, but he taking this very personally. And the fact that you were holding back moans, refusing to touch him more than necessary and trying to stay in your character was infuriating him. It wasn't his character that makes you feel good, it was him.
He ended up throwing you in the bed a little harder than he intended, his touch becoming rougher and his kisses even wetter than before.
Good god, it's good that the scene ended soon after you two got to the bed, or else you would have lost it. You're already soaking wet, you have no idea what you would have done if this kept going for too long.
The scene was perfect, as much as you're embarrassed about it, it was pure perfection. Not a single time did the director called cut, you didn't had to retake the same scene from another angle. Nothing was said about your so called acting besides that you were in complete sync.
He's taking revenge on you, isn't he? Because even now after you finished your scenes for today, he looked at you with the same hungry eyes. And you swear you didn't mean it, but it made your pussy clench.
You gave him a quick look, squeezing your thighs together for a moment when he looked back at you.
It was something that he never saw before, the way you act. That expression on your face, pouting and looking at him with this thing in your eyes that made him want to drag you somewhere far away from people. You needed him, didn't you? And he was going to help you if you asked him to. Because if he got you in that state, then he also had to resolve your problem.
But you didn't spoke to him, you just looked at him all needy for a moment, like you wanted his touch back on you and then left, leaving him with the worst bonner he ever got in his life. This, only to come back a few days later for your next scenes.
You were driving him insane. And there aren't enough interactions in the movie to take out his frustration on you. There are too little scenes, and sometimes he had to improvise when he was getting too lost in his feelings. A few kisses here and there, just a quick peak when you were in the background to give more life to the movie.
But you still didn't said a thing, acting like this was all part of the script, like you were payed to do so.
So can you blame him when he wrote you another letter again? This time more aggressive than the previous times. Talking about how you got him feeling, how he craves for your touch and it drives him insane the way you seem not to care. Give him attention, or act like you acknowledge him. And this time he left the paper in your dressing room, placed under one of your stuff where he knows you'll know it was meant for you.
Too bad he couldn't see your reaction when you read the letter, but he realized you weren't too happy about it. It got you acting paranoid again, he could see it in your eyes, your body language. How you need to have a bit of distance from anyone that tries to come too close to you, and how you seem not to trust people anymore.
It was just a letter, he didn't even wrote everything down. No, in fact, he held back a lot. Because if he did wrote his mind you would refuse to come back into the movie set ever again.
But that's your charm, I guess. How you don't hide your feelings, and how you try to not make it obviously that you're displeased with things even if it's written all over your face. You're a good actress, a very good one, and yet you don't act unless you're required to. You were the opposite of him, where he always haves a mask on, the same business smile as you. But unlike you, he doesn't mean an thing, this friendly facade.
You were genuinely a sweetheart, while he only acted as he sees fit. And in this moment he's so close on fucking everything up just to toy with you. Because he's at his limits.
It was time for another suggestive scene, the set being filled with less people than usually. The lowlights, the atmosphere and everything in there was a bit suffocating. But maybe because of how much you overworked yourself these days.
"Do you think the plan will work?" you asked, sitting on his couch and looking at the coffee table that was placed there by the staff members.
"Do we have any other option?" he said his line in a serious tone, his character was supposed to be stressed from all the unfortunate events that happened lately, but it seems that he too is stress. Well, everybody been working overtime lately, but the sooner you were done with this movie the sooner you could move on with your life.
"I wish we could resolved this peacefully, I'm tired of fighting." you sighed, looking at your fingers for a moment and then at him who was resting not so far from you on the couch.
"Come here." he pat his lap, his back resting against the couch and he didn't even wanted to move an inch from there. He was improvising again, he was supposed to get up and drag about bottle of alcohol into this.
You followed his instructions, not wanting to pretend to be drunk again, and somehow not wanting to act in that moment too. If he haves a better idea for this scene then you'll follow his lead.
So, you sat on his lap, legs spread on either sides of him and wrapping your arms around his neck. His hands resting on your hips, moving towards your ass as he grabbed you and dragged you closer to him, your chest pressed against his as he placed you over his hard cock. You could feel him through his pants, and for a moment you stopped functioning, not knowing how to react to this.
"Well figure it out." he kissed you, his hands going under your shirt to make contact with your burning skin.
The kiss was so sloppy, both of you too tired to figure out a pace you should go at. Just touching, getting lost in the way your bodies seem to welcome each other openly. For a moment even forgetting where you actually are at the moment, and if the director wouldn't have said cut, you could have definitely escalated things.
What was going on in your mind? How could you let yourself so carefree? If you was just a bit more tired and at a state where you couldn't think properly, you would have definitely dragged him to your changing room and fucked him there.
And you woke up with another letter, even worse than last time. Talking about how your body looks, how he wants to get his hands on you, how you turn him on in the worst way possible.
The more you ignored those letters, the more they came. It got so bad, describing his fantasies, the way you appear in his dreams to haunt him like he wasn't haunting you right now. You had no idea who the sender was, because sometimes the letters would be sign as S, sometimes they would just be filled with nothing but filthy words and no signature. But you knew it was the same person from their handwriting.
You'd always wake up with them in places where there aren't many people allowed. And no matter how hard you're thinking about, you can't figure who it was. There were no cameras in this side of the studio, so you couldn't even see who was tormenting you.
"Why don't we go drinking tonight?" the director said one time before you were almost done with work fot that day. "We're almost done with filming, lets celebrate." after all these stressful days, you could use a drink.
It will be quick, go there, have a chat with a few people, have a drink and then go home. But just like last time, one drink turned into too many and you ended up in a corner of the bar with your costar who seemed to feed you even more alcohol.
He had his chin resting against his palm, looking at you with a smile on his face as he kept pouring more of that bitter liquor into your glass. "I can't drink no more." you couldn't even speak properly, hiccuping and moving left to right, like you were about to fall off your chair.
"One more won't hurt." the bar was still filled with people, so he had to keep himself in place.
"I got the car ready." your assistant came to your table looking at you and then at the white haired man. "I have to take her home, she's already too drunk." maybe he should get rid of this one too. It seems that all your assistants like to get in between his plans.
But perhaps he got a better idea. He took your glass, gulping down everything that was in it in a second before he tried to get you to the car. "Give me a ride too." he got in the backseat of your car, pretending to fall asleep after some time.
Your assistant tried to call anyone related to him, to come pick him up from your house because he seems too drunk to even stand on his own feet. But since no one was answering, they had no choice but to get him in your house, leaving him on the couch before they left.
It was always easy, so damn easy. He couldn't help but laugh. Drunk, him? He never got drunk in his life. Alcohol seems to have no effect on him.
He made his way to your room, getting next to the bed and looking at you sleeping. How dare you be so at peace when he's there? You were panicking all over the place last time he wrote you a letter, crying and refusing to talk to anybody if it wasn't for work. And now you act like you forgot about it.
He stood in place, looking down at you with an expressionless face as he can't think of anything at the moment. He got this far, so what? He could scare you more, give you a reason to hate him but at the same time all he wants to do is stand there all night and look at you.
He took his phone out, taking a quick picture of you before he put it back in his pocket.
He sat down at the edge of the bed, not far from where you're sleeping, looking out the window and then back at you. You had quite a nice view, no wonder you always seem to be in a hurry to come home.
Should he do something mean? Leave another letter in your home to see your reaction the next day. He could put it in one of your pockets and act like he doesn't remember anything besides going to the bar to drink. Maybe even leave the front door open and say some shit about hearing something while he was asleep.
But before he could think of anything more, you extend a hand, grabbing him by his shirt and trying to drag him closer. Like before, he just stood in place, looking down at you who seemed to pull harder. Were you mistaking him for the blanket or something? Unfortunately for you, he won't take off his clothes until you do so.
"Mm." you groaned, opening your eyes to look at the white haired man confused. "Ah.." you rubbed your forehead. "Fuck." that was the first time he heard you swear. "Come here." were you still sleeping? Because he doubts you'd react that lightly to him being there. But you were calling for him, and he wouldn't dare to say no to you. So he got in that bed, getting all cozy next to you and waiting for your next move.
For a moment you just touched him, moving your hand on his face, trying to feel something before it went lower on his body. He stood there, observing your clumsy actions and letting you do whatever you wanted with him. Your hands kept wandering, from his chest to his abs under his shirt, and now you were tugging at his pants, trying to see what you didn't got to see until now.
You were funny, the way you looked surprised whenever you discovered something new about him. "Don't do that." he said when you kept trying to get your hands in his pants.
"I want to see it." you pout, looking at him for a moment before you moved his shirt out the way, exposing his lower abdomen. "If you're as big as it feels." his heart skipped a beat, he couldn't help but cover his face with his hands. Do whatever you want, he'll hold back so you can explore as much as you want. "Ohh!" seriously, he can't even look at you when you make those faces. He was biting his lips so hard, he's afraid he might moan before you even touch him. "Why are you so big? Look at the size." his cock twitched, making you let out another surprised sound.
"Touch it." he said between his teeth, looking at you between his fingers and at what you're doing.
Your eyes moved on his, a serious expression on your face before your eyes went back to his dick. Can you even fit something like this inside you? The size was just ridiculous, but that didn't stopped you from touching it. Moving your hand around and studying like it was the first time seeing a cock.
He was bucking his hips forward in your hand, breathing heavily as he tried to keep himself from touching you. This was the first time you ever showed interest in him, he can't just fuck this up.
"How does it feel?" you asked, looking at the way he throws his head backwards, his chest rising and falling down.
Good, it feels so fucking good. He might go crazy from how soft your hand was. He moaned, not even being able to let out words, or think of a way to respond to you.
"I want that too." you took your hand away, making him to finally look at you as you took your clothes off. Now sitting on top of him, taking his cock back in your hand and trying to take him inside your pussy. But it didn't matter how much you're trying, it was impossible to get at least his head. It hurts, the more you try the more frustrated you became. "It doesn't fit." his dick twitched again. You're killing him, you're saying stuff he didn't imagine you to say, and it was killing him inside.
"I'll make it fit." he pushed you off him, pinning you down into the bed as he got in between your legs, placing kisses on your body as he went lower and lower, until he got to your pussy.
He loved the way you taste, it was better than he imagined. So much fucking better. It was no wander he was trying to devour you, I mean, who knows when he's going to do this again. So he might as well do it until he memorizes your taste.
Your hands went through his hair, tugging at it lightly as you let out soft moans, even cursing under your breath from time to time, letting him know how good you were feeling.
He pulled a few orgasms out of you, loving way too much the way your thighs wrapped around him, or how you're trembling, looking at him with teary eyes and you only seem to want more.
He'll give you more, he'll give you as much as you ask for, fuck, even more. He'll make sure to make you fit him, prepare you so good that you could only fit his cock from now on. He'll give you a reason to keep going back to him.
He got up from between your legs, sitting next to you as he got his hand back to your pussy, slowly pushing two fingers inside and making you gasp. "Is it good?" he whispered in your ear, feeling the way you clench around him. All you did was to nod, looking at him with big doe eyes and leaning more into him, to feel more of his warmth.
"Deeper." you said when he didn't went more than halfway through, moving his fingers at a slow pace that it left you hanging, almost giving you no friction whatsoever.
He kissed you quickly before moving his eyes back on your pussy, resting his cheek against your head. Be careful what you're wishing for, he'll go so deep that you'd feel him in places you never knew existed. It's already hard to hold back, but if you keep provoking him he might let his mind slip for a moment.
So, doing just as you asked him to, he got deeper, curling his fingers upwards and making you squirm. He kissed you again, this time taking no break as he kept bullying your insides, making your walls get tighter around him. How is he going to live without this? How can he go back home and act like everything is normal after this? That's why he couldn't help but move faster, in a irregular pace as he kept stopping from time to time only to go rougher. So you wouldn't get too used to him.
You were a moaning mess, and he seems to only want you to lose your mind, pulling orgasm after orgasm from you, kissing you as he made you turn around so he could do it from another position. He wants to go even deeper, to get back at your words, for requesting unnecessary things when he was going to give you what you wanted anyway.
"One more, come on baby. Give me one more." for how much longer is he going to say that? He's starting to get on your nerves at this point. But in the end, he finally took his fingers out of you. Dragging you closer to him so your back could be pressed against his chest, one of his arms under you head as he kept your hair away from your face, so he could be able to look at you. "You'll fit me now." he whispered in your ear, dragging your hips back and grabbing one of your legs, spreading them apart as he start whispering more filthy words in your ear. "Look at how you're taking me in." he said, waiting for you to say something, but to his surprise, you're long gone into the dream world. Sleeping soundlessly in his arms, like you forgot that he was even there.
He can't believe this. You actually fell asleep. You really dared to fall asleep and leave him there after you dragged him in your bed. The audacity you had. He's going to make sure to give you a hard time tomorrow for this. So, he too fell asleep next to you. A bit hard to do so, but he managed somehow.
The next day you woke up with your head killing you. You shouldn't have drank that much, how could you have been so dumb.
You were about to turn around when you realized that someone was in your bed, a pair of muscular arms around you, and someone breathing into the back of your neck. Your heart stopped working, you froze in place as you saw your soul leaving.
"Morning." a masculine voice could be heard from behind you, and you feared that you knew exactly who it was. He pressed his body into yours, letting you know you were both naked, and feeling his hard cock pressed against your back.
You wanted to cry, you wanted to run from there and not look back for a single moment. How could you have been so stupid, how could you just do that. Just how drunk did you got?
"Don't tell me you're planning on running away." he whispered into your ear, making you flinch. "You dragged me into your bed, put your hands all over me and now you're going to leave me after you used me as you pleased? I had no idea you were that type of person." you whined, because that's all you could do in that moment. What other explanation do you have?
"I can explain." he pressed his cock into you harder, making you yelp.
"Oh yeah?" one of his hands traveled on your body, now going up towards your boobs, making you gasp when he groped one. "You kept me up all night." you cried at his words. "Don't you remember the way you got on top of me? Trying to get my cock inside then crying about how big it is." you closed your eyes shut, trying not to let out another whine from remembering what happened last night.
"I'm sorry.." what else could you say besides that?
"You weren't sorry when you were telling me to go deeper." his hand went down your body, wanting to go in between your legs to spread them again, but you jumped out of bed.
"I'm sorry, alright. I have no idea what got into me last night." you were really planning on running? Don't make him laugh.
"So you really just used me then, huh?" he stood there, in your bed. Half his body being covered by the blanket while the other was all naked, his skin exposed to you and he didn't seemed to me ashamed at all by what happened.
But if you think about it, he was the one who got a bottle of a really strong liquor and dragged you to the corner of the bar, making you have a glass with him. "It's your fault too." his eyes wided, looking at you like he didn't expected to hear that. "I might have dragged you in my bed, but if you didn't liked it you wouldn't have stayed." he smiled, finally letting his mask drop as his body language suddenly changed. He looked more relaxed, a smirk on his face as he uncovered more of his body.
"Come here. Let's continue from where we were." you moved you eyes away from him, not daring to look in his direction as you could see his cock. "Don't be shy now. You weren't last night, so why should you be now?" you're not going to listen to his nonsense anymore. "You don't want me anymore? How sad." he looked at the way you were going to your closet. "I still want you though." you ignored him as you went to get dressed. But you couldn't even do that in peace because he got behind you, wrapping his arms around you, and resting his chin against your head. "You should wear that, it looks good on you." he pointed at some dress you had in there.
"I'm not going anywhere today." you want to be comfortable, not dress up for nothing.
"Then wear nothing. I like it when you have nothing on." you could feel that, since he made it sure to let you know he was still as hard as before.
"Here." you said as you picked some clothes that were clearly too big to be on your size. "You can wear this." now that's he's thinking about it, something doesn't add up.
"Why do you have male clothes in your closet?" who else wore these? And you dared to give them to him like it was nothing too.
"I like buying them since they're comfortable." oh, that was an option too. Why didn't he thought of that? I mean, it's been quite a while since you last been in a relationship, and he knows that since he always knows what you're doing. What if he's not paying attention to you one time and you get married? He can't possibly let you do that. That empty spot in your bed was reserved to him. "We needed to talk." you said after you got dressed, getting out your closet and walking outside your room.
"About what?" he knows this moment. You always make people sign an NDA before you get into a anything deeper. But what he doesn't like about your relationships is that it's almost never too intimate, you just go out, eat, spend some time together and then that's it. Did one of those fuckers left you disappointed and now you're avoiding contact with other people? How sad. But well, since you have him now you don't have to think about that anymore. He'll get you drunk on his dick, and he'll make sure you only have eyes for him.
"I'm sorry, but I don't know if we can continue this." huh? That wasn't what you were supposed to say. "We still have to film the movie, and then the promotions. I don't want anything awkward between us."
"What about after?" you didn't said a thing, only looking down at your feet before looking at him. "So you did play with me, huh?" perhaps this was your revenge for making you feel weak. He can't believe you actually knew of his doings and you didn't said a thing.
"If you still feel the same after everything is done.." huh? What did you just said? You were actually going to give him a chance? The NDA still sounded better, and he'll sign it in a blink of an eye if you do hit him with one.
He thought that something would change, that you'd be more open to him. But no, you were still as distant as ever.
You were playing with him, weren't you? You were just playing dumb because you knew how he actually was feeling. Well, he too can tournament you. From that day onward he kept writing you everyday, placing the letters in really inconvenient places and watching your reaction from not that afar if he could.
He made sure to not let you rest a single moment while you were on the set. It did not lasted for long whatsoever, because the filming soon ended and the film was sent to editing, giving everybody a break until the promotions starts.
You skipped the party, lying about how you got a cold and you didn't want anyone else to catch it, so you stayed at home.
You still remember the day the trailer was published, the way your phone was blowing and how you didn't dared to even look at it that day. But when you did turned it on, everything was worse than you imagined.
The trailer opened with a scene of the city, then it got to the point of where the conflict started, and as you watched more, the more scenes from the movie were put in, the fighting, the peaceful times, and it ended with you and Satoru kissing against a wall. A big long scenes of just the two of you almost fucking in there, and you couldn't be more embarrassed.
The comments? You could smell them from a mile away. You could hear screamings and whistles, like you knew exactly what people were talking about. And you were right because when you opened that section you were met with people talking about you and your costar rather than the trailer itself.
"Was the last scenes necessary?" a comment said, and you couldn't agree more to it. But the replies under it said otherwise.
Your social medias? Filled with people purring about you and Gojo. And he seemed to enjoy this as he kept liking comments about the two of you. And now people were officially calling him your husband. He was the one demanding to be called yours, not the other way. Because you weren't his property, he was yours.
You tried to get out the house in god knows how many days, finally going to the agency to talk to your manager about the situation. Can't you calm it down somehow? And the answer was no. The media was responding so positively about this, you couldn't just say something about it when you were put in such a good light. I mean, look, there were so many people requesting for you appearance than any other times before. Your team was busy responding to phone calls and emails for you.
So many people wanted you in their movies, because if they get you they also get Gojo. Since he apparently, you have no idea when, said that he won't act in a movie unless you're there. And if you accepted a role, then they automatically get Satoru too. Killing two birds with one stone. Having two of the most hot actors, who happened to be a so called power couple, acting in their movie was a free pass to the most sold movie of the year.
But you didn't even looked at those offers, no matter how good they were. You don't want to get involved with him anymore, he was only going to bring you problems.
Instead of accepting any offers, you decide to make a quick appearance on some big show that only asked for you to participate. The first thing you heard today that didn't involved Gojo's name into it.
You were so happy to go there, all a smile and stress free knowing that you don't have to get involved with that guy any time soon.
Did you really think that it was going to be that easy? You just got there on the set and you were met with one of the questions you were trying to avoid.
"First of all, I'm a big fan." the host said when you sat down on the couch. "But I don't really wanna say much so your boyfriend won't get jealous." you awkwardly laughed. "How is he, btw?" you had no idea what to say.
"You know." you said, biting your lip and trying to think of an excuse. "We both been busy." you don't even know in what county is he right now.
"I'm sure you are." the interview went on, moving to other discussions and you managed to forget about the white haired man for a moment. "Hold on a second." the host said as they talked to a staff member. "So, um, I was informed about something. And, Y/N, we actually have a gift for you?" how sweet, you thought. Only to be welcomed with your costar on the set, making the audience clap. "What a surprise, right?" you smiled, putting on your same old business smile on as you tried to keep your composure.
"I was nearby and I was thinking why not paying a visit." he lied as he got closer to the couch.
"It's always nice to have you here." the host said. "Please sit down, I actually wanted to ask about the new movie you two played in."
"I'd love to but I'm kinda in a hurry." he leaned down towards you, placing a quick kiss on your cheek and messing with your hair for a moment. "You two have fun." he said as he got away from you. "I have to go now. I wasn't even supposed to stop to begin with." he waved as he left, making the audience sound way too happy about this.
"Relax, no need to be shy." the host said, looking at your expression. "We already saw the trailer, it's nothing we haven't seen already." you wanted to cry. "So, about the movie. Does it have more of those scenes or were we deceived with the trailer?" you'll make sure to pick a written interview next.
"I'm not really sure if I should talk about it.." you tried to change the subject.
"It's not like you're spoiling the movie for us. We're curious about you and your partner." and that's what you don't like.
"Well.." everybody's eyes were on you. "Let's just say that you'll see more." that was enough to make the crowd go crazy.
Because of that guy now you can't even deny that you two aren't together anymore.
You would have been alright with all of this if the nothing happened between the two of you, and if Gojo felt the same way as you. But he seemed to push the idea of something happening between the two of you to the public. It was driving you crazy because you didn't know how to react. You always told yourself that you won't get involved with anyone from the industry, that you'll make a few more movies and then retire, find someone simple and live an almost normal life.
But instead you're here, stuck with media actually approving of this non existent relationship.
You have to talk to Satoru next time you see him. But you never really got the chance to do that in private when the promotions started.
Interview after interview and it only looked like you were surrounded by more and more people. And he didn't wanted to talk to you when you tried to pull him aside, talking about how people will think something inappropriate about the two of you when he was the one who was saying stupid things in front of the camera.
Now it was the premiere, having to stay arm in arm with him the whole time. And he doesn't hold back even for a moment, letting his hands roam around your body and making the crowd go insane.
"Let's talk." you whispered to him, making him lower his head so he could hear you.
"What about?" he was playing dumb, he already knew what you wanted to say.
"Do you have some time later?" you said as you wrapped your arm around his, following his lead as he was guiding you around the red carpet.
"Who knows." he said that, but at the after party you managed to trap him in a corner not allowing him to go away before he had a talk with you. "There are people watching." a smile on his face as he said that, looking at your angry face as you had him pinned to the wall.
"I don't care. You're going to run again." look at how the roles switched. He had no idea you would actually try to confront him.
"Then." he wrapped his arms around you, looking down at you and grinning from ear to ear. "What do you want to talk about."
"People are thinking that we really are in a relationship." your current position wasn't any better either. People were giving you looks like you were being perverts in public.
"They are?" why was he acting shocked when he was the one feeding that idea to others.
"We don't have to pretend anymore." you said, but that only made him to drag you closer.
"You said you'd give me a chance after we're done with the movie." you said a lot of things that you didn't mean, why was this any different.
"I just said that I don't want people to think we're in a relationship. What do you not get?" snap at him more, he can't be any happier than he's at that moment. He leaned down, his face getting closer to yours and placing a kiss on your cheek.
"Keep your promises, don't disappoint me." you huffed, turning your face in another direction only for him to turn it back towards him and kiss you on your lips. "Let's get out of here. It started to get boring anyway." why did you listen to him was a mystery, why you followed him to his car and back to his house was something you couldn't figure it out. And how you ended up in his bed? You can't really respond to that either.
He was kissing you, hands under your clothes and trying to get them off as fast as he could. Moaning into your mouth whenever you touched him, pushing his body into yours and trying to become one with you in a way or another.
How could you think that you could leave him? What would he do if he doesn't have you? What is he supposed to do from now on if he can't think about you 24/7? To even dare to think about abandoning him, he's going to punish you for this.
"Turn around." that stupid dress was in his way, he can't believe your stylist really made you wear this. What if there are fuckers out there who still dares to look at you even after he made it very clearly who you belong to.
Well, whatever. He'll make sure to get rid of that stylist of yours. Not a big problem.
He kissed your back as your skin became exposed to him. With a swift movement taking your panties off and throwing them somewhere easy to spot, to not forget to take them later.
You had to tell him to take his clothes off so you could catch a break, otherwise he would have took you there from how impatient he was.
You just stood there, at the edge of his bed, one leg over the other and looking at him trying to take off his tie faster. He really had to wear a fucking suit, now look at him, he was about to rip it off him. And look at you, you look so calm about this, enjoying seeing him struggle while he was losing his mind. "Undress me." he looked down at you, taking a few steps closer to you, and taking your hand in his and placing over his white shirt to unbutton it.
You might as well do it, you don't see why not. But the problem was him and his stubbornness. Kissing you, almost pushing you in bed while you were just trying to do as he said. It took a long time, and the task seemed to never end, but here you were now, with him on top of you and making you wrap your legs around him. No fancy party could make him miss this, in fact he couldn't even care about that damn premiere to begin with.
His hands were traveling on your body, touching you in some of his favorite places. You were so warm, he couldn't help himself. How you gasp whenever he's groping you, dragging you closer to him so he could feel you even closer, even if there was no more space left between the two of you.
"Put it in already." you demanded, but he wasn't going to just give it to you yet. What if you struggle like last time? He can't let you say such dirty words again or you might not be able to walk at all tomorrow.
"There's no rush." you can act as cute as you want, he's going to take his time with you. After all, you need to see how good he can treat you, make you feel so good that all you'll remember is his name. He kissed your forehead before he moved his eyes on his hand that was going in between your legs. "Look how wet you are." you were a bit embarrassed about it. "And you said that you don't want me." your body can be more honest sometimes, and he'll love to learn more about it.
He got some of your juices on his fingers, moving it around your clit to see the way your body tensed immediately. Weren't you a needy one? He kissed the side of your face before pushing two of his fingers in, paying attention to the face you were making and at the way you were sucking him in.
He moved his hand at a relatively slow pace, it was more about to make you feel the way you're taking him, how deep his fingers can go compared to yours, or anybody else. You can only feel like this because of him. See the way you're still so tight? That's because he wasn't there to stretch you out the way you needed.
"Keep your eyes open, alright baby?" he spoke to you in a baby voice, making you feel like he was mocking you. "Don't hide from me." can't he just fuck you already? Why was he playing around so much.
You did tried to do as he said, keeping your eyes open and trying to avoid eye contact with him because it made your pissy clench. This was so embarrassing, the way he was taking his sweet time and giving you almost no friction at all, and how he seems to enjoy this. Like torturing you was bringing him pleasure.
He didn't let you say a word and smashed his lips against yours, placing his palm against your clit as he finally started to move like he means it. Curling his fingers up so hard it got you squirming and letting out a few moans. And you never seem to stay in place, moving around and arching your back every time he was hitting something that makes you see stars.
You were a mess, the way you were so wet that your juices got on his bedsheets, and the noises your body makes were so obscene and loud it was hard to ignore.
He noticed the way you look at him, pleading for some mercy like you were at your limit about to break. But there was so much more in you, one orgasm wasn't going to stop him from giving you another. And he swears on his name the next one will be even mind blowing.
That's when he took his hand back to himself, making you sit more comfortably in bed before he positioned back in between your legs. This time he'll make sure you'll stay awake and take all of him, there was no other way.
You looked at his face and then at his cock, at the way he had his head at your entrance, almost pushing it in. You'll take him? Like, you're really going to fit him? "You can do it." he said when he finally pushed some of his cock in. "Fuck." he cursed under his breath. "I know you can do it." he let out a moan, throwing his head back for a moment before moving his eyes back on you. Your eyebrows furrowed, eyes closed and the cutest pout you ever showed him. It was like you really had a death wish, to fuck with his feelings like this and making his dick twitch. If he couldn't control himself any better he would had came right there on the spot. "Too much?" he said as he kept pushing his cock all the way in, making you nod as your words were stuck in your throat. "That's too bad."
You won't see any sympathy from him. Does he even knows what that means to begin with? You're too delicious, and the fact that he could pull even more expressions out of you made him push you over your limits.
So here he was, moving in and out of you way slower than he wants, rubbing your clit with his thumb and observing you like the pervert he is. He was salivating, drooling over your weak form as you showed him your off guard self. His cock twitching every time you let out a moan, and making you jolt at the sensation.
"Does it hurt?" he asked as he kept looking down at you, moving his hips in the same old motion. You nodded again, eyes still closed and biting your lip because of how he made you feel. He'll make it hurt even more, don't think that you can rest yet just because he's going easy on you. Fuck, he wants to sink his teeth into you so bad, leave marks all over your body as he rams his cock in and out of you.
But then you looked at him, big teary doe eyes that had him seeing a flash before him. He almost came, like, he almost cum just because you looked at him. If you want him to keep it together you have to talk some sense into him, because he doesn't think he can recover from that.
"You can move." no, don't give him a green light. Torment him more, play with his feeling and edge him till he's losing his damn mind. Don't be so sweet to him, he'll end up locking you up if you do that.
He pressed his chest against yours, his mouth finding yours as he started kissing you like the most starved man on earth. He moved his hips without a warning, slamming into you like you were his toy, and yet demanding for your touch. He was pushing himself into you, trying to steal the air away from your lungs as he seemed more desperate with each thrust.
He was looking into your eyes, waiting for you to snap at him and push him off, or tell him that's he's being too rough so he could stop being so delusional. But you didn't, only dragging him closer, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him just as needy as he was, both of you being a moaning mess. And not letting go of each other even after you came, wanting to feel even more. To cum again and again, and to be filled by him to the brim, even if you knew that would bring you some serious problems later when you finally come back to your senses.
The next day you woke up with a sore body, your skin aching all over the place, and barely being able to get up the bed.
That didn't stopped you from getting dressed with some clothes you found around the room, what you can only assume it was his since they were way too big.
You got out the room, in hope to find your phone or maybe the white haired man so he could get you back home. And now you were in the living room, looking around for your things. Instead finding a letter, that seemed way too familiar.
That handwriting, you could recognize it everywhere. And that damn signature, the fucking S.
It was one of the letters he didn't managed to 'give' it to you yet. And honestly, you don't know if you should be relieved or terrified because this one was worse than anything before.
You turned around, paper still in your hand and looking at the tall guy who had his back pressed against the wall. He was expressionless, no thoughts behind his head as he seemed to stare at you like he was looking into the void.
It was him, that damn son of a bitch. He played with you all this time and you had no idea.
"I made you breakfast." he said, not every caring if you found out about his doings or not. "Come while it's still hot." he let out a laugh at your expression. You never hold back, do you? Can you at least try to not look like your about to kill him?
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chenlezip · 2 days ago
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spidey boy ♡
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PAIRING : spidermark! x fem!reader
SUMMARY : you noticed marks been hiding things from you and after one fateful interaction with spiderman saving you.. you piece the dots together.
WARNINGS : creepy guy in the beginning, not proof read..
A/N : this is a little long.. >.< my love for spiderman and mark came out all together in this.. PLSS cast him !! (or dont.. i dont wanna share my man looking good in a spidey mask...) | also for me hitting over 200 followers, hope you enjoy ☺️
perm tag 🤍 : @injvns @polarisjisung
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mark lee.. your best friend, roommate. he was hiding something from you. you noticed he came through the door, big backpack on his back with a few cuts scattered across his face. he just brushed it off as nothing but you could tell it wasn’t just nothing.
the next day while walking home, you were walking down the secluded alleyway that lead to your dorms. it soon started to pour down, you curse under your breath. you tried to shield your head before bumping into a strange man, he snickered as he looked down at you, “what's a pretty thing like you walking down here in the dark?”
you gulp as you look up.. of course this only has to happen to you. you try walking past but he reaches out and has a tight grip on your wrist, "aw baby, where you goin?" he smirked.
he pinned you against a nearby wall, the coldness of it making you shiver more. "l-let go!" you shout out before he covered your mouth with a scoff. "as if anyone is gonna hear you, huh?"
you both heard webs slinging around you, your eyes widening. the man’s face went from a smirk to a look of terror when he heard the familiar slinging of a web. he let go of your wrist and turned around, face to face with spider-man.
“well, well, well.” spider-man's voice rang out through the alley as he took a step closer. “looks like I caught myself a nasty little bug.”
before the man could run, the masked superhero quickly slung a web at him, pinning him down against to the wall. he turned to you, "you alright?" his voice sounded.. concerned.. almost as if he knew you? you just brushed it off and nodded, "um- yeah, i think so.."
“you think it’s a good idea to mess with random girls in an alleyway?” spider-man asked, his tone almost mocking, turning his attention to the male who is still struggling against his web. the man opened his mouth to speak but spider-man shot out a web, silencing him. “that was a rhetorical question. obviously, it wasn’t a good idea.”
the man eventually breaks free, running away screaming. the masked figure was about to go after him but he couldn't leave you alone especially with what just happened.. but he does decide to tease you, slinging a web up and pretending to leave. you look around, "spider-man?"
he ends up upside down behind you, tapping your shoulder, "forgot something i left here." you could see him grinning behind his mask. you smile, "how will i ever thank you, spidey?" you teased.
"well- i uh.." spider-man rubbed his nape sheepishly before you offered a kiss. "how about a kiss, hm?"
spider-man's eyes widened in feigned surprise, “a kiss? well..” he mused, his tone almost playful. “I suppose that would be a pretty good way to show your appreciation.”
you move your hands to the bottom of his mask, lifting it just above his lips. you widen your eyes, you know marks facial features from anywhere...
spider-man - mark - just looked back at you, his breathing hitching ever so slightly. you placed a soft kiss on his lips, pulling away after some time as you notice the rain getting heavier. "thank you again, spidey." he nodded towards the rain, “you should head back. don't want you getting wet out here, now, do we?”
he then shot out another web, about to swing away but stopped before he did. “and don’t go down this alleyway after dark again, alright? I might not be there next time.” you smile and nod, "fine.. i'll ask my roommate mark for a safer way."
his masked eyes widened slightly before he composed himself, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. “your roommate mark, huh? lucky guy, having a pretty girl like you live with him.”
he then slung away as you walked back to your dorms, you smiled to yourself. you knew spider-man was mark, but you couldn't help yourself waiting to see what he would do when you get back.
you got back, entering through the door, running a hand through your soaked through hair. "mark?" you call out. there was a moment of silence before mark's voice answered from the living room, “yeah?” you walked over to where he was, seeing him in a white tshirt and grey sweatpants. he changed.. quickly? “you’re back,” he said, his eyes immediately landing on your soaked through hair.
"yeah- i uh, got home a bit later than usual because i had a problem in the alleyway and guess who saved me? spider-man.." you ramble a little, looking out the corner of your eye to see marks reaction.
you noticed his body tensing before he coughed, "oh- spidey huh? i'm glad he was there to save you." you continued, "he seemed really concerned.. as if he knew me?" mark's heart was thudding in his chest, but he tried to maintain a calm demeanour. “concerned, huh? well, that’s kind of his job, isn’t it? saving people and all.”
you nodded, "well- yeah, obviously mark, he's got to save people but it felt weird.. even when i kissed him, i recognised his lips.. you're not spiderman, right?"
mark's eyes widened, "huh- what? why would you ask me if i'm spidey?" "because your lips looked alike."
mark was caught completely off guard, his mind racing as he tried to come up with a believable response. he swallowed hard, his throat feeling dry. “that.. that’s just a coincidence, y/n. a crazy coincidence.”
you raised a brow, "uh huh.. and what about you coming back here to the dorms with various cuts and bruises - especially on your back."
mark cursed silently at himself. he had hoped you hadn’t noticed all the random cuts and bruises he’s been getting from his late night patrols. he quickly tried to come up with a plausible excuse.
“oh, uh, those? nothing to worry about, just some scrapes and bumps I’ve been getting. yknow, clumsy me.." he chuckled nervously. he didn’t want you to worry about his secret identity or the dangerous adventures he went through every night as spider-man.. you already were stressed from the amount of college work you had. he tried to change the subject, hoping to divert your attention away from everything. “so, uh, you had a good day apart from the alleyway incident, right?”
"it was okay, the usual.. but don't try and divert the conversation we were having, mark lee, you're making this more suspicious." you raise a brow, "let me have a look at your back."
"fine.." mark groaned as he lifted his tshirt up, showing you his muscular yet bruise and cut adorned back. you couldn't help your eyes drifting.. he had a really nice back. you shake your head. the male tried to steel himself for your reaction, mentally rehearsing a thousand different excuses if you were to find similarities between the injuries and what spider-man often sustained on patrol.
"you aren't just clumsy, apparently spider-man had an outing with black cat the other day.. you have a claw mark, right.. here." you whisper, placing a finger on it. mark swore under his breath as you pointed out the unmistakable claw mark on his shoulder. it was undeniable now that you’ve put the pieces together. he still tried to play dumb, however, and turned back to face you, feigning confusion. “claw mark? what claw mark?”
"don't play dumb with me, mark.." you huffed out as you sat down on the couch opposite him. mark knew he couldn’t keep up the act any longer. he let out a heavy sigh and leaned back against the couch. “alright, fine.” he muttered. “you win. I’m not just ‘clumsy’, I’m also.. spider-man.”
"shouldn't have come save me and i wouldn't of known it was you, hm? especially when we kissed, i recognised your facial features from anywhere." you smile. mark couldn’t help but scoff as you jokingly teased him. he rolled his eyes, but a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “oh yeah, because just letting you get mugged in an alleyway is such a great alternative, y/n.”
He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “and as for the kiss.. i couldn't say no to a pretty girl, i'm not an idiot.. but also - it was probably the best kiss i've ever had - i mean, upside down?"
you smile, "well.. since i know you're spidey, can i at least clean you up after you're in a bad fight?" mark's heart softened at your offer. the idea of you tending to his injuries and caring for him after a tough fight as spider-man was undeniably pleasing. he nodded, a small smile on his lips. “yeah.. I’d like that. but you’ve gotta promise to keep this between us, alright? no one else can know.”
"secrets safe with me, spidey boy."
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lunabug2004 · 3 days ago
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Reblogging this bc the current reactor I'm watching just gave me a prime example of this!
She watches the scene with Nancy & Steve dining with Barb's parents and cries with Nancy, talking about how she has no one she can talk to about her feelings (her survivor's guilt). She's legitimately so upset for Nancy (rightfully so).
However, when it cuts to Mike's own depressive episode about El, she pretty much immediately starts acting like he's being dramatic. She starts saying "Michael" in a disappointed-esc tone, and even specifically says he needs to take the fort down because it's been long enough. She makes the connection of his "rebelling" being because he "misses El" (her words exactly), but doesn't go any farther than that. She doesn't seem to catch onto his grieving, at least not to the same extent that she did Nancy's.
She knows El is alive for sure, despite never seeing the show past season 1, because she'd seen promo stuff for s4 all over the media. I fully believe this is why it's so much harder for her and a massive portion of the GA (bc anyone who watched the s2 trailer knew El was alive as well) to see the connection between Nancy's and Mike's survivors guilt.
And while I don't know for sure if this was on purpose (I'm leaning towards yes bc it was very hard to believe El wasn't still alive at the point of the first episode coming out), I do think it's pretty unfair towards the character of Mike. Plus adding his dislike of Max into the mix, which is mostly due to all the emotional pain he's in, made people start to dislike him in this season.
I just think with how much the Duffers (& all the actors) claim to love Mike, these were very strange choices to make.
Something I've noticed recently is the difference in which people notice or think/talk about Nancy and Mike's survivor's guilt.
People seem to be much more open to the notion of Nancy having survivor's guilt, also they tend to pick up on it easier, and I think the reason for this Nancy actually kinda demonstrates herself in s2, when talking to Jonathan when she says "Yeah, but it's different for you. Will came home."
Now, Mike feels survivor's guilt in connection to both Will and El, and Nancy for Barb, and the difference between them is that both Will and El actually survive. But the thing that people tend to forget is that Mike saw Will's "dead body", he saw El disappear in front of his own eyes just to not hear from her for almost a year, he saw his best friend's body and mind be taken over by a terrifying monster (who he had just told he wouldn't let happen to him a day or so before). So, yes, El and Will may not be dead, but in any case, esp in Mike's 11-14 year old brain, that doesn't really mean much at all. Mental illnesses don't go away just because the thing that caused them did. I mean, that's legitimately what PTSD is!
Talking about s2 specifically for example, even at the beginning of the season, most of the GA already knew that El was still alive, but knew for sure that Barb was dead. The show parallels Nancy and Mike in ep 1, with Nancy crying in Barb's house and Mike looking terribly upset while boxing up toys in his basement. Despite this parallel though, most people I've watched only pick up on Nancy's survivor's guilt. Even though Mike goes on to try and contact El, who he still (mostly) believes is dead, lots of people just go "aw that's sad" or "aw that's sweet" and move on.
Idk if it's just because he's younger, or that, as I said before, the audience knows El is still alive, but it's always seemed to me that people don't take Mike's mental health problems as seriously as they take Nancy's when really, they're in a very similar boat.
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aventurineswife · 2 days ago
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hey so feel free to ignore this request if you're uncomfortable with it. Can i ask Kinich x suicidal reader? They're already dating and the reader confide in their true feelings about slowly losing the will to live because they feel like they cant handle life.
More explanation: i imagine the reader have a laid back, cheerful and out going personality, the reader joke about offing themself everyday intentionally so nobody will take them seriously if they ever for real tell them about it.
Also i kinda see Kinich as young adult(19/20) and i think the reader is also one who is struggling with adulthood(the reader's family used to spoil them)
Note: this is so self-indulgent, im so sorry if this makes you feel uncomfortable😭 should've just talk to a therapist bot on c.ai or summ.(sorry if this triggers you☹️)
“If I Fall, Will You Catch Me?”
Summary: You and Kinich have been dating for some time, your contrasting personalities complementing one another. While you wear a mask of cheerfulness and make light of your struggles, you harbor a deep internal battle against feelings of inadequacy and hopelessness. One night, unable to maintain the facade any longer, you confide in Kinich about your true feelings.
Tags: Kinich x Reader, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Suicidal Thoughts, Emotional Vulnerability, Found Family, Struggles of Adulthood, Fluff and Angst, Supportive Partner, Healing Through Understanding.
Warnings: Mentions of Suicidal Thoughts and Ideation, Themes of Emotional and Mental Health Struggles, Potential Triggers for Readers Sensitive to Discussions of Depression or Hopelessness, Includes moments of emotional distress but concludes on a hopeful note.
A/N: I'm really glad you felt comfortable sharing this, and I want to remind you that you're not alone in how you're feeling. Struggling with these emotions, especially when the world feels heavy, is so difficult, but it’s okay to reach out and talk about it when you're ready. You don’t need to carry everything by yourself. Life can be really overwhelming, and even though it can feel like you're stuck or that things won’t change, there is support available to help you work through it. It's okay to feel lost or unsure—what you're going through doesn’t make you any less valuable. Take care of yourself, and I hope you find the peace and healing you deserve. You are worthy of it! 🫂💖🫶
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The sun hung low in the sky, casting a golden hue over the trees of the canopy. The air smelled of damp earth and the wild, untamed beauty of nature. You sat on the edge of a rock, watching the wind ruffle the leaves, your feet dangling over the edge.
Kinich sat next to you, his eyes scanning the surroundings with that focused, pragmatic gaze of his. He wasn't one for small talk, never had been, and you appreciated that. Silence between you felt like a comfortable thing, a space where words weren't always necessary. Still, you knew him well enough by now to sense when something was off.
You leaned back, stretching your legs, trying to distract yourself from the heaviness that had been creeping into your chest for weeks. Life felt like a mountain you could never quite scale, and no matter how many times you tried to climb, it always felt like it would swallow you whole.
"Hey," you said casually, as if this was just another joke, "maybe I should just go out and... off myself, y'know? Maybe then I'll find some peace."
You tried to make it sound light, as you always did, tossing the words out like they were nothing. It was the same joke you made every day, the one you used to hide the truth. But today, your smile felt forced, and you hated the way the words tasted in your mouth.
Kinich didn’t laugh. He never did when you said that.
You glanced over at him. His eyes were locked on you, unreadable yet piercing. He didn’t say anything at first, just let the silence drag on.
Finally, he exhaled deeply, his expression softening, but not in a way that was comforting. "You don’t get to joke about things like that with me," he said quietly, his voice steady, almost too calm. "Not anymore."
Your heart skipped a beat. He'd never said anything like that before. You turned to face him, your playful demeanor slipping away as you stared at him.
"Kinich, come on. You know it’s just a joke. I’m fine," you said, trying to backpedal, but the words didn’t sound convincing, even to you.
He didn't say anything, but his gaze hardened slightly, and for the first time, you saw a flicker of something deep in his eyes. Maybe it was concern, maybe it was frustration, but it was there. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, the intensity of his presence filling the space between you.
"You think I don’t notice?" Kinich said, his voice barely above a whisper, but it held weight. "You laugh and joke, but I can see it. You’re not fine. I’ve seen the way you look at the world like it’s just... too much. Too heavy. Like you’re carrying something too big for your shoulders."
You stiffened, your throat tightening as the words he said felt like they were cutting straight through the walls you’d carefully built around yourself. You didn’t know how to respond.
"I’m... I’m just tired," you managed to say after a long moment. "Everything’s harder than it should be. It feels like I’m never going to figure it out. And... I don’t think I have the strength left to keep pretending."
Kinich didn’t look away. His expression was unreadable, but there was something in his gaze that made you feel like you were under a microscope. He didn’t need to speak to convey how much he understood.
"You’re not alone in this," he said softly, and for the first time, there was a tenderness to his words that made your heart ache. "You might feel like you’re alone, but you’re not. Not anymore."
The silence stretched between you two again, but this time, it felt less oppressive. Kinich’s presence beside you was comforting, even if you didn’t fully understand why. He wasn’t the kind of person who offered comforting words freely, but when he did, it always felt genuine.
"I don’t know what you’re going through," Kinich continued, his voice still steady. "But I know what it’s like to feel lost. To feel like you’ve got nothing left to give. To carry things you shouldn’t have to carry. I’ve been there."
You turned your gaze away from him, a lump forming in your throat. You hadn’t expected him to share anything about himself, and it made you realize just how much you didn’t know about him, despite everything.
"Kinich…" you started, but he held up a hand.
"I don’t want you to carry this by yourself," he said, his voice hardening slightly. "I’ll help you carry it. You don’t have to handle everything alone. Not anymore."
Tears welled up in your eyes, but you didn’t want to cry. Not now. Not in front of him.
"I’m scared, Kinich. I don’t know how to keep going when it all feels like it’s too much," you confessed, your voice shaking despite your best efforts to remain steady.
He didn’t hesitate. Kinich placed a hand on your shoulder, firm and unwavering, and his eyes softened just a little. "You don’t have to have all the answers. Just take it one step at a time. And if you fall, I’ll be here. You won’t have to do it alone."
You blinked, feeling the walls around your heart crack just a little, the weight on your chest easing ever so slightly. Kinich wasn’t here to fix you. He wasn’t offering grand solutions. He was simply offering to stand by your side, no matter what.
And for the first time in a long while, you believed him.
"Thank you," you whispered, barely able to keep your voice steady. "I don’t deserve it."
He shook his head, the faintest smirk playing on his lips. "Don’t talk like that. You’re not the only one who’s struggling. We all have our battles."
You nodded, trying to hold back the sob that was threatening to escape. For the first time in weeks, you felt like you might be able to breathe again.
Kinich didn’t speak further. He didn’t need to. His presence was enough. And that, in itself, was a promise.
A promise that no matter how dark things got, no matter how heavy life seemed, you wouldn’t have to face it alone.
You weren’t sure what the future would bring, or how you would handle everything, but you knew one thing for sure: Kinich would be by your side. And that, somehow, made everything a little easier to bear.
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xechu · 2 days ago
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[Devour] Chapter 2: Yearning
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Pairing: Ryomen Sukuna x fem!reader
Word count: 4.5K
Warnings: please read my blog's rules before interacting. 18+ mdni, angst, eventual smut, hurt/no comfort, explicit sexual content, undertones of misogyny (because the 'olden days'), mature themes, depiction of gore and violence, mentions of pregnancy and abortion. Please note that these warnings pertain to the entire series as a whole, and not just to this specific chapter.
Tags: mini series, angst, smut, Heian Era, true form Sukuna
Summary: Sukuna brings you back to a temple, where he resides. There you also meet Uraume. You begin to doubt if running away was the best idea, but then, Sukuna offers to be your ally. Unbeknownst to you, he has his own ulterior motives for helping you.
A/N: It's here! Not going to lie, I struggled a bit with this chapter. Since this is a mini series, I would say we're already about 35% through the story, things will progress quickly in the upcoming chapters. Based on my planning, I'm looking at about four more chapters. I don't have an exact release date for Chapter 3 like I did with this chapter, but I'll post an update when it's almost complete! If you would like to be added on the tag list for this series, please let me know/leave a comment here. Thank you so much for reading and stay tuned. x
Masterlist: < Chapter 1 | Chapter 3 (To be continued) >
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Sukuna had always deemed love meaningless. It was a feeling that held people back, making them irrational and reckless. Over the years, he had witnessed the greatest kingdoms burn and the strongest men fall, all in the name of 'love.' But the tragedy lay in the fact that, after all was said and done, that love seldom lasted. At the end of the day, people were weak and fickle, rendering love volatile. He often wanted to ask those who sacrificed everything for love: Was it all worth it in the end?
In order to attain his height of power—to become the strongest—Sukuna had given up everything, including his humanity. He had mastered the art of detachment, for attachments only served to tie one down. Letting go of all things was the inevitable cost of power, but it was an easy and insignificant sacrifice for someone like him—who had nothing to lose in the first place.
Yet, despite the King of Curses' strong convictions, there remained one glaring contradiction in his life: you. No matter how hard he tried, he could not detach himself from you. Even after all these years, his burning desire for you was a flame he could not quell, and it only seemed to grow hungrier with time.
Throughout the years, Sukuna had conditioned himself into believing that you were always going to be an unattainable dream—a fantasy that was never meant to become reality. It was better that it remained this way. You deserved to live a peaceful life, and he could continue to live out his days as the King of Curses without restraint.
But what should he do—now that his dream had become reality?
For someone with a wretched life like his, he never believed in any gods. But for the first time in his life, the King of Curses acknowledged that this reunion must have been the universe's divine will—a preordained fate. It seemed that the two of you were destined to be together.
Yes, he thought to himself, since the universe has willed it, then you shall be his exception.
He vowed that as long as he kept you by his side, you would not be a source of his weakness.
At this realization, a dark possessiveness took over him.
This time he would stake his claim.
---
Though you were no longer the little girl Sukuna had once met, he couldn't help but notice how small you were under his hold. Some things didn't change; you were still his little flower.
“It’s me, flower,” he said, urgency creeping into his voice as if he were calling into your subconscious, imploring you to remember.
You trembled in his embrace; the adrenaline coursing through you made it difficult to think straight. His words did not register as you struggled to gather your chaotic thoughts, while your mind screamed at you to run.
You remind me of flowers. The voice suddenly echoed in your mind.
“R-Ryo?” you gasped, finally making the connection.
With shaking hands, you roamed his figure, seeking confirmation in the darkness. Your fingertips softly brushed over his features. Was this a dream? Had you already died? How was it that after all these years, he was finally here—especially in your most dire moment? The surrealness of this situation felt too good to be true.
“I-It really is you,” your voice quivered with emotion. “I-I can't believe it. All this time... I thought I would never see you again."
“I'm here now, flower,” he said, capturing your hand in his. “Come with me; it’s not safe.”
Before you could utter another word, he effortlessly scooped you up, and you instinctively held on to him, tightening your grip, afraid that if you let go he would slip away again.
Sukuna traversed the forest at an inhuman speed. He seemed to know the terrain well, navigating it with ease, but for you, all you saw was unending darkness; the gust of wind threading through your hair was the only sign that you were moving. Your heart raced as he cradled you against his strong body; you could feel the heat radiating from him, evoking a warm and familiar feeling within you—a feeling that you have yearned for so many years.
Moments later, you found yourself in a clearing. Under the clear night sky, vast greenery and towering mountains loomed around you. At the foot of one mountain, a grand tree stood beside an ancient temple. Sukuna gently set you on your feet, and now that you were out in the clearing, you could get a better look at him. Standing before you was no longer the little boy from your memories; he had transformed into a formidable man—perhaps the largest person you had ever seen. He wore an oversized kimono, his bare chest exposed, and his muscular build attested to the life he had lived throughout the years. Your gaze was then drawn to the unmistakable bloodstains on his clothing.
“Are you hurt?” your brows furrowed in concern as your hand ghosted over the stains.
“Nothing worth fretting over; they do not belong to me,” he said, a smile involuntarily curving his lips at the concern you displayed.
Sukuna lifted your chin to meet his gaze. In the moonlight, he could see you with much more clarity.
“Beautiful,” he murmured, a hint of longing evident in his eyes.
Heat rushed to your face at his touch, but you were grateful that the night concealed it.
“How did you know to find me?" you quietly asked.
“The forest and the mountain are my domain,” Sukuna replied, brushing his thumb over your lower lip, as if he was trying to engrave your features into his memory. “You were lucky I found you before something else did.”
Something in your gut told you it couldn't have been mere coincidence, but you decided to keep that thought to yourself. It wasn't the time nor the place for interrogations.
"I see," you smiled wearily. "Thank you... you saved me yet again."
Your words stirred a nostalgic memory within him.
As you continued to stand there in silence, the brave facade you had been putting up began to crumble. All the events that had led you to this moment settled within you, and the feelings you had long suppressed surged to the surface—grief, resentment, confusion, fear, relief, yearning—a tempest you could no longer keep at bay.
“All these years, I’ve been searching for you,” your voice cracked, tears brimming in your eyes.
"I know," he replied, his tone low and hushed.
“Y-You did?"
Sukuna nodded.
"Then why, Ryo? Did you not want to see me?” Your chest tightened at his admission, and tears began to roll down your face.
“It was for the best.” Sukuna's jaw clenched. The sight of you crying evoked a sense of dread within him.
“The best for who?”
A brief silence hung in the air, heavy with unspoken words.
“That no longer matters, flower. We're here now, and I won't let you go again,” he said, gently wiping a stray tear from your face.
You knew he was hiding something from you, but that mattered little right now. Your body reacted before your mind, and you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace.
---
Wooden floors creaked beneath you as you crossed the threshold of the temple, and an inexplicable wave of energy washed over you. It was intense yet comforting, like the warmth of the sun—like him.
The temple was small and modest, but it felt peaceful and comfortable. It was also evident that the wooden interior had been well-maintained despite how ancient it was. The air was filled with the soothing scents of incense and cedarwood.
The earlier conversation with Sukuna loomed over you, leaving so many questions unanswered. While you could still sense a semblance of the little boy within him, he also felt unfamiliar and distant; after all, so much time had passed. You longed to know everything about him, to fill in the gaps, but perhaps that would have to wait.
As you took a closer look around the main hall, your eyes wandered to the beautifully crafted sliding doors at the back, which were fully open to reveal a serene garden that captivated you with its lush greenery and vibrant flowers.
“It’s so beautiful,” you breathed.
Sukuna looked at you under the soft glow of the candlelight illuminating the hall, and your heart began to race under his gaze amid the intimacy of the setting. He watched you intently as if he could hear the intense beating of your heart—
“Sukuna-sama, you’re back,” a gentle voice cut through the air.
You turned to find a young person standing there. Their gender was ambiguous, but their appearance reminded you of winter's first snowfall. They exuded a calm and serene presence.
“Uraume,” Sukuna acknowledged, gesturing toward you. “She is with me. Draw her a bath and prepare some fresh clothes. I’ll get a fire started.”
“Yes, Sukuna-sama,” Uraume replied, hastily leaving for the back of the temple.
You watched as Sukuna stripped off his kimono, revealing his muscular upper body adorned with tattoos.
“Ryo, where are you going?” you asked, trying to mask the fluster in your voice.
Sukuna turned back to look at you with a smile. “I’m going to hunt some game. We’ll fill our stomachs before going to bed.”
---
The warmth of the hot spring quickly melted away the stress of the day. You still could not wrap your head around the uncanny turn of events; it felt like a nightmare turned dream. Instead of being married to Lord Yamamoto, you were now reunited with the one person who had always occupied your thoughts. A sigh of relief escaped your lips as you reached for a washcloth to gently remove your makeup. You knew that there would be other matters to address later, but for now, you wanted to savor this brief respite.
Sinking the lower half of your head into the water, you blew small bubbles, and images of Sukuna and the man he had become flashed in your mind, sending a warmth throughout your body.
Sukuna's renown had been spreading in recent years, and you were acutely aware of his reputation. Whispers surrounded him, calling him the King of Curses—the strongest jujutsu sorcerer of the era. There was much debate over whether he was merely a man or a deity, while others believed him to be a demon in disguise. Your village, having a strong aversion to jujutsu sorcery, viewed it as more of a curse than a gift and seemed to believe he was nothing short of a demon.
Regardless, you had only ever known him as Ryo, so you never gave much thought to the rumors. Man, deity, or demon—whatever he was, you would have accepted him unconditionally. Despite the time apart, you still felt an inexplicable tether to him.
I won't let you go again.
Those words stirred an emotion within you when he had initially spoken them, but doubts and hesitation lingered in your mind. Had it not been for your current predicament, you would have been more inclined to stay with him.
You held your breath and submerged yourself entirely beneath the warm water, hoping to silence these chaotic thoughts—even if just for a moment.
---
Feeling refreshed as you stepped out of the temple in a new set of clothes, you noticed that a fire had already been started and that Uraume was preparing some vegetables.
“Uraume-san,” you smiled as you walked over, “is there anything I can help you with?”
“Y/N-san,” Uraume exclaimed, a gentle light in their eyes. “All the preparations are nearly complete. Why don’t you sit by the fire first? Sukuna-sama should be back soon.”
You hesitated and looked to see if there was still anything to help with, but noticing how there was not much else, you acquiesced and made your way to the fire. You watched in awe as Uraume skillfully finished the last touches of their work. Soon after, they settled down beside you. It was a comfortable silence between the two of you, accompanied by the crackling of the fire.
“Have you and Ryo always lived here?” you tried to make conversation.
Uraume nodded, their expression thoughtful. “We’ve lived here for quite some time. I owe him my life.”
You looked at Uraume, curiosity piqued.
“I was at death’s door when he found me as a child,” Uraume confessed softly. “He took me under his wing.”
“He’s always been kind.” You smiled contemplatively.
“Yes,” Uraume agreed. There was a brief pause. “He…has also mentioned you before.”
“He has?”
Uraume nodded. “He said there was once a girl he met who lived in a village not too far from here. She was as kind as she was beautiful, and she reminded him of flowers. When I saw you, I knew you were that girl.”
It warmed your heart to know that he had spoken about you, but it also felt bittersweet.
“Ah, he’s back,” Uraume remarked, glancing behind you.
Your eyes widened at the spectacular sight before you. Sukuna had a deer slung over his shoulder, effortlessly making his way toward the two of you; he trekked as if the deer weighed nothing.
Sukuna dropped the deer by the fire, and Uraume instinctively got up, ready to prepare the meat. You watched as Sukuna slashed the deer's throat, collecting the blood in a bowl. A wave of queasiness washed over you, and you looked away, unable to face the brutal sight. Sukuna settled down beside you while Uraume got to work, efficiently cutting up the rest of the deer.
“Drink every last drop,” he commanded, handing the bowl to you.
“I—I don't think I can,” you put your hand out in defense, the metallic stench making your stomach churn.
“You are malnourished,” he said, grabbing your wrist to examine its size. “Have you not been looking after yourself?”
“I have,” you insisted, attempting to wiggle your wrist free from his grasp. His touch felt searing against your skin.
“You will drink this, unless you would like me to feed you,” Sukuna insisted, handing you the bowl once more, the intensity in his eyes leaving no room for argument.
You took the bowl in both hands, trembling slightly. As you watched the thick red liquid swirl inside, you held your breath and brought it to your lips, tilting it ever so slightly and allowing the liquid to slip into your mouth and down your throat. Just as you were about to lower the bowl, Sukuna's hand clasped over yours, tilting the bowl upward to ensure you finished everything.
“That’s it, flower—every last drop,” he said, his voice low and steady. When he was satisfied that you had consumed all of it, he released his grip and took the bowl from your hands. You gagged at the aftertaste, coughing as a trickle of blood ran down your chin. Sukuna's eyes grew dark at the sight; he wiped the blood from your chin with his thumb, then licked it clean.
“Ryo—!” you gasped, teary-eyed. “N-no more of that, please.”
“That will depend on how well you eat,” a hint of playfulness threaded through his voice.
“Do you drink this too?” you asked, clearing your throat.
"Of course, the blood of a deer is a highly nutritious delicacy. Did you know in some places, it is a drink shared by a married couple on their wedding night?" Sukuna smirked.
You shudder at the thought. This blood drinking experience was something that you hoped would be your first and last. But the slight implication that Sukuna made at the end also made you a bit shy.
Uraume handed a plate of skewered meat to Sukuna, and you marveled at how quickly they had prepared it. You watched as Sukuna stabbed each skewer into the ground by the fire, your attention lingering on the flames that seemed to beckon you.
"I should have whisked you away from the village earlier, had I known you were not being fed properly." Sukuna intently watched you with one of his eyes, sensing your tension.
"Well, why didn't you?" you muttered. The words escaped your mouth before you could stop it.
You were sure he had his reasons for staying away, yet you couldn’t hide your disappointment in him for keeping his distance. So much precious time had been lost, and so many what-ifs lingered in your mind.
It was juvenile, but you often dreamt of how the two of you would grow up together—an inseparable duo, the best of friends. Then, when you came of age, he would have asked you to follow him, and you would have gladly followed him anywhere. The two of you would travel all over the land, experiencing the world side by side. Perhaps, somewhere along the way, he would have asked you to marry him, and you would have said 'yes' without skipping a beat—
"Come now, don't sulk, flower," Sukuna said, breaking you out of your thoughts. "You're here now. We will make up for lost time."
"You speak as if I'm going to be staying here for good," you couldn't help but challenge him a little.
It might have been your imagination, but you thought his expression darkened for a split second.
"It sounds like you have somewhere to go then."
"I—well, I didn’t have too much time to think details. But I planned to make my way to a far out village, where no one will be able to find me."
"That would be difficult," Sukuna hummed.
"It’s worth a try… better than yielding to the fate I was subjugated to." You hugged your knees.
"Enlighten me, what was someone’s bride doing in the middle of the forest?” he asked, a hint of amusement in his voice.
There was a hesitation in telling him about your plight, but you knew it was also an unavoidable topic—after all, he had saved you, so an explanation was due at the very least.
“I ran away… from a marriage I wanted no part of.”
“How bold,” he chuckled. “It’s very like you.”
“It’s hardly a laughing matter, Ryo,” you huffed, anxiety evident in your voice.
“But you've successfully escaped. Should this not be a cause to celebrate?” he cocked an eyebrow.
“I don't know if I would consider it successful just yet," you narrowed your eyes. "I didn’t just run away from any man; I ran away from a lord. My village hoped to leverage my marriage with Lord Yamamoto for aid. There will be repercussions for my actions.”
Sukuna listened as he rotated the skewers.
"Hm, I suppose that is quite the predicament. Whatever shall you do then?" His question came out more like a taunt than a show of concern.
"Are you mocking my situation?" You frowned, your expression dropping as self-doubt crept in. You had to admit that you'd been reckless with your decision, and you didn't exactly have a reliable plan. You wouldn’t have even made it out of the forest had it not been for Sukuna.
“Of course not. Don't look so defeated," he softly tsked, smoothing the crease between your brows with his fingers.
You looked at him with a mixture of surprise and hesitation.
"Is there any reason for you to worry if I am going to be by your side?" he returned your gaze, a burning confidence in his eyes.
“It’s not so simple, Ryo. I don’t want you to be caught in my problems—”
“A mere lord and your measly village is not a problem,” Sukuna replied, passing a skewer to you.
You reluctantly accepted the skewer, your fingers momentarily brushing against his hand during the exchange. As divine as the meat smelled, you couldn't bring yourself to eat; your worries and anxiety loomed large over your head.
"It's not going to eat itself if you keep staring at it," Sukuna sighed, crossing his four arms and giving you a stern look.
Taking a tiny bite, your eyes momentarily lit up. It tasted even better than it smelled. Before you knew it, you had devoured the entire skewer, and Sukuna was already handing you another one. Perhaps you were hungrier than you had thought, but his pleased expression did not escape you—he cared, and that alone filled you with immense happiness.
"Do you not wish to stay here?" he asked, breaking the silence.
"It's not about what I want," you shook your head. "What if something happens to both of you because of me?"
"You needn't worry about us, Y/N-san; we are more than capable of dealing with Lord Yamamoto," Uraume smiled at you. Their gentle reassurance only seemed to amplify your guilt.
"We can't be sure of that—"
“Are you not aware of what they call me?”
You sighed, a sense of apprehension filling your chest. "I am..."
“Then if you know my reputation, you should understand that even if Lord Yamamoto and his entire arsenal, along with your village, were to descend upon us right now, they would not stand a chance.”
Sukuna seemed adamant about helping, but that only served to heighten your uneasiness. It wasn't that you doubted his capabilities; but you also understood that your actions would have dire consequences. A runaway bride of Lord Yamamoto wasn't a matter that would be overlooked so easily. Surely, the four men who had escorted you had reported back to their lord that you had escaped. Even if Sukuna could easily deal with them, he would be branded a criminal—forever having to be on the run. He had endured enough hardships in his life, and it felt like you were only adding to his strife. You didn't deserve this kindness from him; his life was fine before you came along.
"This will be your home. You will be safe as long as you stay by my side. So stay here, Y/N.” An unexpected possessiveness laced Sukuna's voice.
You looked up at Sukuna in surprise; you had never heard him call your name before. His eyes silently pleaded with you to stay—shattering your resolve.
"Tell me you need my help, flower," Sukuna urged, looking into your eyes with an intensity that made your breath hitch.
A lingering silence filled the air, broken only by the crackling of the fire and the rhythm of your heartbeat.
"Help me, Ryo…" you finally said.
---
You hadn't felt so full in a long time. Sukuna had ensured you ate your share of food before retiring to bed. Following behind him, you were led to your sleeping accommodations, and to your surprise, he took you into his chamber, which overlooked a small private garden and hot spring.
The temple was modest in size, containing only two bedrooms. It didn’t feel right to intrude on Uraume's private quarters, especially since it was Sukuna's decision to keep you, but he also couldn’t deny he had other intentions.
Before crawling into bed, you turned to meet Sukuna's gaze.
“Ryo… I don’t know how I could ever repay you. If there's anything I can do for you, you must tell me," you said earnestly.
“Hmm,” he paused, feigning contemplation.
You looked at him eagerly, trying to anticipate what he could ask for.
"Anything?" he drawled, rubbing his chin.
You nodded.
“Alright," he smirked, "swear yourself to me.”
Your eyes widened. You weren’t exactly sure what that entailed, but you trusted him implicitly. He most likely needed an extra hand with taking care of the temple and doing some extra work around here.
“A-are you sure that’s all you want? That hardly seems adequate, I am troubling you after all.” You fidgeted with the hem of your sleeves.
"You undermine yourself, flower."
“Oh, well, I do have many skills I could offer, and I promise to be useful around here. I’m quite knowledgeable about plants, herbs, and flowers. I may not be as good a cook as Uraume, but—”
"Staying by my side is enough," he interjected.
There was a sincerity in his voice that was new to you, making your heart do flips inside your chest.
"Ryo..." you spoke quietly, clasping your hands tightly. "I might misunderstand if you're so kind to me."
Oh, what a delight you were. Sukuna felt an intense urge to smother you.
“Well, what if I wanted more than just your domestic skills?” he asked lowly, taking a lock of your hair into his hands.
Your heart raced, and suddenly the room felt hot as you understood his implications.
“Is that… what you truly desire?"
"And if it is?"
There was a brief pause.
Just this morning, you were still in utter despair, wholly expecting to be wedded to a monster. But now, in this moment, it was not Lord Yamamoto before you, but rather the man of your dreams—the only man you had wished to marry. He had long claimed your mind and heart; what more was your body?
"Then take me," your voice was barely above a whisper.
Sukuna’s eyes darkened, but why did he feel so disappointed by your response? It almost rolled off your tongue too easily.
"You would just give yourself to any man, so long as they ask?"
"N-no, you misunderstand!"
Sukuna remained silent, the look in his eyes demanding you to elaborate.
"If that were true, I wouldn’t have ran away from Lord Yamamoto. You're not just any man to me, Ryo. I—" love you. The heat crept up to your ears.
Your timid confession sent a chilling thrill through his body, awakening a primal hunger within him, he could no longer resist.
“Do you truly wish to be mine?” he asked, tucking your hair behind your ear. You felt dizzy under his touch and gaze.
"Yes..."
"Look at me and say it." He hissed.
"I'm yours, Ryo. I want to be yours." You met his eyes and gently took his hand, placing it over your heart, hoping he could feel how violently it was beating against your chest.
“You didn’t need to ask me to swear myself to you; I would have gladly followed you anywhere. I've felt that way ever since we were children.”
Sukuna was rarely caught off guard. The first time he recalled was when you approached him as a child, and the second was this very moment. You had just confessed your feelings for him and expressed a desire to stay with him of your own volition. Nobody else had ever been able to elicit these feelings from him, and the dominion you unknowingly held over him was both terrifying and thrilling.
"Then I will take you, flower—your heart, body, and soul."
Without sparing another moment, he wrapped his hand behind your head and crushed his lips against yours in a searing kiss. The world around you fell silent.
For once, it felt as if the universe had smiled upon his wretched life.
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Writing © xechu - please do not redistribute, translate, or repost any of my works.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the pictures used for the banner.
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Taglist: @paradisestarfishh @ssetsuka
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thehollowwriter · 2 days ago
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I've been thinking about Nkulu and what he would sound like and how he would talk. He's got a heavy Xhosa accent when he speaks English or Japanese, and he uses a lot South African slang because though one parent was originally from (twst) Brazil, he was born and raised in (twst) South Africa which I think is at least in the Afterglow Savanah.
I thought I'd share some examples of slang and expressions, cause I think it would be fun to share with everyone and I don't really use South African slang online (I also think it's funny how confusing some of them can be. It feels like opposite day)
☆"Just now/now now"
The second one especially makes it sound like you mean right now at this second, but here it could be anytime between right now and tomorrow. "Go wash the dishes" "Yeah I'll do it now now" and "now now" could be in half an hour. Who knows.
☆"Shame"
Though it is used when expressing pity a lot ("Ag, shame that's terrible") it's also used in a positive way, mostly when referring to cute things. "Look at that kitten!" "Aww shame man." So uh dw we're not insulting your kitten/j
☆"Ja, nee:"
"Ja nee" is just "yes, no" in Afrikaans, and it's generally used similarly to "okay"/ to confirm or agree with something or to disagree with something. "Where you there yesterday?" Yeah, no, I was there." "The movie was good, right?" "Ja, nee I was a bit disappointed." Or just "Ja nee, I don't know."
☆"Jislaaik"
Pronounced "Yislike." Jislaaik is an Afrikaans expression of amazement, shock, or surpise. "Jislaaik that looks cool"
☆"Haibo"
(Hi-boh) This is a Zulu term that has a ton of meanings, but can basically be boiled down to an exclamation of surpise, shock, or disbelief. "Haibo, what happened?!"
☆"Yebo"
(Yeah-boh) Another Zulu term, this one means yes. However it's usually used as a very energetic and excited way of saying yes. "Hey, wanna hang out?" "Yebo!" "Hey, hey!" "Yebo?"
☆"Ag, nee man"
"Ag" is basically "Oh" (pronounced like how Germans pronounce "ach", according to Google, bc I literally have no idea how to describe the sound for G in Afrikaans sbsbdndn) "Nee, man" means "No, man." in Afrikaans. The man is pronounced "mun" kinda. The phrase is essentially a way of expressing frustration, pity, or disgust. "Ag nee man, did he really do that?"
☆"Eish"
Eish (E-sh) It's an expression of surpise for a lot of things line frustration, surpise, regret, or sympathy. (you can see we have a lot of those lol) "Eish man, that sucks."
☆"Lekker!"
(Leck-ir) There's no English equivalent for this word, but basically it's an informal Afrikaans word that has a lot of meanings depending on the context. It can mean something's great, cool, yummy, etc. "Oh, that food looks lekker." "Lekker braai, neh?" (A braai is basically a barbeque but we only cook with charcoal and it makes everything taste amazing. "Neh" is basically just our "Eh")
-
So yeah that's my little list of slang words! I hope you guys found it interesting!
Tagging: @distant-velleity @br3adtoasty @rainesol @theleechyskrunkly @jovieinramshackle
@galaxies-and-gore @cyanide-latte @cynthinesia @officialdaydreamer00 @krenenbaker
@offorestsongs @kitwasnothere @elenauaurs @boopshoops @inotonline
@1dont-really-know @kazumify @minteasketches @elysia-nsimp @skrimpyskimpy
@casp1an-sea @offorestsongs @tixdixl @poisoned-pearls @the-trinket-witch
@ramshacklerumble @ghostiidasponk @thegoldencontracts @sillyslipperybananapeel @cloudcountry
@skriblee-ksk @twstinginthewind @lumdays @theolivetree123 @natsukishinomiyaswife
@authoruio @jewelulu @raguiras @moonyasnow @skibidibabygirl
@quartztwst @yuizenihaswriten @devosin @oya-oya-okay @b0njourbeach
@kirans-wonderland @coffinkissez @idikeis @s-t-y-x @tixdixl
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axel-mania · 22 hours ago
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I'll issue a small correction: characters and relationships are *always* supposed to be canonized as long as they don't include an inanimate object or a nebulous group. Only then rule of three potentially comes into play, which is why Kenta (the New Japan wrestler) has a canonical tag for his crutches. This means if you get two of your friends to also write about Kenny Omega's eyebrows or something then you will probably get it to canonical status. Rule of three is used mostly for freeforms, which is why there's not very many wrestling specific freeforms.
Some more details: the awkward thing about choosing what goes into the character canonical is that we have to take into account what fics already exist and what is most likely to exist in the future. We have to balance the desires of all the current users. If a wrestling promotion never got tape or no one on Tumblr or Ao3 fandom has ever shown interest in it, we're probably not going to include a wrestler's name from that promotion. It might seem like we're arbitrarily including something unpopular, but fics get deleted very often, much more often than you think, and dead tags get left behind.
When we changed Swerve's tag after he joined AEW, he still had NXT fics under his name there. There used to be maybe one hundred Dragon Gate fics and they were all purged, leaving lots of characters with old names to deal with when fic started up again. The order of the names is totally arbitrary, we just usually put the newest name first, or the name that won't mess with the alphabetization as much.
As Dana implied, in 99% of fandoms character tags don't get changed pretty much ever, and they don't have to deal with fiction vs reality. There are some fandoms that regularly get requests to change them, even, and have decided not to do so. We have no RPF category and probably never will, because too many people write RPF using fictional wrestler names. (This is okay! Dustin/Greg/Trent/Chuck is a lot of fun.)
You might want us to include every possible name that a wrestler goes under, but then what happens is any relationship tag they're in hits the character limit, and we have to delete some of the names in the relationship canonical. We're encouraged to keep the tags as short as possible for this reason.
We are separating wrestlers by distinctive fictional character whenever possible now. For example, Uncle Howdy has been kept separate from Bo Dallas. It's more difficult to retroactively separate popular wrestlers who were in Lucha Underground a long time ago, even though they were almost all absolutely different characters, because of how many fics we're talking about and how intertwined the tags are. Frankly unless there's a desire for this from Lucha Underground fans sending support requests I don't see this happening.
If you're bothered by anything you're absolutely free to send in a support request. We're not going to see it as you being a Karen or anything, it's a routine part of wrangling. The other wrestling wrangler co-signs everything I wrote.
I love the way wrestlers gimmicks get sorted on ao3 bc it ends up being up to the discretion of the first couple ppl who write them what tag ends up being common. Half of wrestlers arent even marked the same guy as their name on the indies but according to ao3 canon the 64 million yr old dinosaur IS the same guy as that one big brother contestant that had an affair on the show
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uceyliyahh · 1 day ago
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NOVACANE
Summary: After dealing with a traumatic event in Desiree's past life she decided to keep her heart closed off and didn't have any desire to love again until she met him.
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smut warning; it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE, PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good at writing ✍🏽 smuts but I’m improving at the moment.
word count: 4378
Jey Uso x Desiree
AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.
comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍
ALSO! I don’t not want nobody stealing my fanfics or take it as theirs that will be an issue fasho so keep it cute respectfully.
I only own my OC along with the make up scenarios
But I’ll be writing along the way since this story is in my drafts on Wattpad right now so yuh. 💁🏽‍♀️
TAGS ⬇️ lmk if you wanna be tag 🏷️@pinkwithhearts @420days @jstarr86 @empressdede @angiedawn02 @biancasreign
@bebesobrielo @skyesthebomb @aikosilo @papireigns-05 @punksyeet @paigereeder @magnificentbouquetmusic
@hunnidmilly @celesteheartsjey @charmed-dreamssss @fearlesschimera @partypoison00 @mselenalovebug @bloodlinesbabe93 @luvrsluxe @4milly @xbriexx @trippinsorrows @yyaktayak
Ø1
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"Open up to me mama,"
"Let me show you how you're supposed to be loved, fuck what everyone else is talking about,"
"I want you and only you,"
"Don't hold nothing back from me, don't shut me out of what you're feeling because I am not going anywhere,"
DESIREE A few years back, I experienced something incredibly traumatic while I was with Jayden. During that time, all he seemed to care about was selling drugs with his gang friends or working on his rap album. If things didn't go as planned, he would come home and take out his frustrations on me.
I found myself feeling utterly powerless in my situation with him, but I was incredibly grateful to have the opportunity to move in with my best friend, Bianca. Her kindness and generosity in welcoming me into her home made all the difference, especially since I had nowhere else to turn.
I started to adopt a more indifferent and aloof attitude, particularly when men approached me for my number. I would simply ignore them as if they didn't exist. To make ends meet, I chose to work at a tattoo shop while also stripping on the side for some extra cash.
I made the difficult decision to shut myself off from everyone, especially men, to protect my heart from further pain and the possibility of abuse. That all changed one fateful night at the strip club when I met Jey. He completely transformed my outlook on life, but I was determined not to let him in without a fight.
I found myself at the airport, eagerly anticipating the arrival of my luggage so I could finally catch up with Montez. She had been deeply immersed in her wrestling career, and I had grown quite close to her husband—almost like siblings at this point. As soon as I spotted my bag making its way down the conveyor belt, I quickly snatched it up, ensuring it was indeed mine before heading out to reunite with them.
I took my phone from my pocket and sent a quick message to Montez, informing him that I was heading outside.
IMESSAGE 💬 Desi🖕🏽: Montez I'll be outside waiting on you Tez😀: aight then little girl bring yo' slow ass on mane Desi🖕🏽: yk sometimes I just want to punch the hell out of you? Tez😀: whatever I am taller than you honey so relax with all of that Desi🖕🏽: you're so annoying honestly you better be here Tez😀: aight
I wheeled my suitcase toward the airport exit, eager to step outside and await Montez's arrival. Finding a nearby bench, I settled down with my luggage, patiently anticipating his appearance.
I grew up in Texas, where I had the chance to explore the beautiful countryside during my childhood. As a teenager, I moved to North Carolina, and now I find myself living in Tennessee with my best friend.
While browsing my social media, I noticed that Jayden has sent me a follow request on Instagram. This is the same person who frequently creates new accounts or uses different phone numbers just to reach out to me, all in an attempt to harass me.
He faces numerous charges, particularly concerning domestic violence, yet his mother foolishly provided bail money to secure his release. I used to hold a great deal of respect for both his parents, but that changed after the incident when he assaulted me.
As I mindlessly scrolled through my social media, oblivious to the fact that he had followed me, a sudden honk from a car broke my concentration. I glanced up just in time to see a sleek Mercedes Benz arriving at the airport. When the window rolled down, I was surprised to see Montez behind the wheel.
"Yo! Desi!" He yelled while waving his hand.
I flashed him a warm smile as I tucked my phone into my pocket, rolling my luggage alongside me toward his car. He stepped out from the driver's side and wrapped me in a hug before lifting my suitcase and placing it in the trunk.
As I swung the door open and slid into the car, I noticed him returning to the driver's side. He climbed in, fastening his seatbelt just as I secured mine.
As he drove away from the airport, we headed towards their house, which was an hour's journey from our location. It promised to be a lengthy drive. Montez had some music playing softly in the background, creating a pleasant atmosphere. Meanwhile, I gazed out the window, taking in the diverse landscapes and neighborhoods that surrounded us.
I believe I made just one trip to Tennessee to see Bianca, and that was during my time with Jayden, when I was pleading with him to allow me to visit my best friend.
I broke the quiet in the car by saying, "I really appreciate you letting me stay with y'all, Montez," and he responded with a warm smile.
"Girl, you're more than welcome to stay with us, Bianca couldn't stop talking about you," Montez responded.
"Why are you here instead of going all around the world with your wife?"
He chuckled at me, "I had to come pick you up Desi since Bianca couldn't due to her schedule but after I drop you off to the crib I gotta catch a flight," I listen attentively while nodding my head in the process.
I thought I would be home alone until they returned from their events, considering they are professional wrestlers. To make the most of my time, I secured a job at a nearby tattoo shop and strip club, ensuring I wouldn't have to spend my days job hunting.
I was offered the job immediately because of my previous experiences back home. I'm optimistic that my time at the Strip Club will be smooth and free of any drama, considering how things typically unfold in that environment.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ Montez had just dropped me off before heading to the airport to reunite with Bianca for their upcoming events. As I settled into my room, I began unpacking my belongings, carefully placing everything in the dresser to keep things neat and organized.
I treated myself to some adorable work outfits for my shift at the club tonight, and I have a strong feeling I'll earn a good amount while I'm there. As I was getting ready, my phone buzzed on the bed, and I quickly picked it up to see a message from Bianca.
IMESSAGE 💬 Binky💗: Hey Desiii just checking in Desi🫶🏽: Hey! Yes I am just now settling in atm Binky💗: that's good how do you like the room? Desi🫶🏽: it's really nice and the bed is comfortable too Binky💗: I'm glad when I come back imma show you around even though you been here before probably forgot all of the places 😭 Desi🫶🏽: probably do need a refresher ngl 😭😭 Binky💗: don't worry girl I gotchu fr you start your new job tonight? Desi🫶🏽: yeah I hope it don't be no drama 😒 Binky💗: yeah I feel you on that I will see you when I get back have a good day at work Desi🫶🏽: kk girly 🤍
I wrapped up organizing my clothes in the drawer and glanced at my phone, realizing I still had a few hours before I needed to head to work tonight. Deciding to save some cash instead of splurging at the airport, I made my way downstairs to whip up a quick meal. After all, those airport prices can really add up!
Bianca's house captivated me with its stunning aesthetic. As I stepped inside, I admired the decor before heading to the cabinet to gather ingredients for my meal. The cooking process began, and I felt inspired by the beautiful surroundings.
I learned to cook on my own because my mother was often absent, while my father was more present in my life. By the time she returned when I was about seventeen, I felt a disconnect and didn't want to forge a relationship with her. It just seemed uncomfortable.
My father was a dedicated worker who always ensured that we had food on the table and everything we needed. I had hoped for the same commitment from Jayden, but instead, he neglected me and treated me poorly.
I almost lost my bond with my father due to Jayden being rude and aggressive towards him but I finally made the decision to leave him without him knowing.
. His threatening messages and calls created a sense of fear about what he might do to me. However, now that I am away, I refuse to let those past experiences affect me any longer.
I finished cooking my food while heading towards the living room I sat the plate down along with my drink grabbing the remote as I turned on something on the TV.
As I sat in front of the television, a thought crossed my mind: if I hadn't experienced everything I did, would I ever find love again? Would I have the courage to open my heart to someone new?
I often doubted whether anyone could truly understand me. I considered myself a fractured spirit, 'or at least that's what I believed.' I constantly reminded myself to guard my vulnerability, convinced that opening up to anyone, especially a man, would only reveal their indifference.
I believed I had finished my meal, so I stood up from the couch and made my way to the kitchen to clean my dishes. After washing them, I loaded everything into the dishwasher for a thorough clean.
I returned to the living room to catch the rest of the show playing on the TV, hoping to squeeze in some sleep before my shift at work tonight.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
JEY As my friends and I made our way to the strip club, we were excited to catch a glimpse of some incredible performances and, if fortune smiled upon us, maybe even enjoy a little fun ourselves. Once we stepped inside, our attention was immediately drawn to the mesmerizing dancers on the pole, all while the pulsating music set the perfect atmosphere for an unforgettable night.
We settled into the luxurious satin couches, enjoying the view of the girls. I casually spread out, my gaze fixed on them, playfully giving them a light tap on their backsides before slipping some cash into their outfits.
A girl named Ke'liyah approached me and started dancing on my lap. As I observed her movements, I couldn't help but notice how I instinctively reached for her waist. She was attractive, though perhaps not as stunning as I had initially imagined.
The guys were encouraging me to fuck her, which I wanted to do because she was all up on me like this, while she was kissing all over my face and neck, which made my dick a little firm in my sweats.
Feeling her tongue against my ear before whispering, "Come fuck me with that big dick of yours," she said as my eyes became dark and filled with lust.
As she stood up from my lap, I slipped her some extra cash while she took my hand and led me into a private room. The cheers from the guys echoed behind us, prompting me to roll my eyes. I knew this was just a one-time experience, after all.
There was one girl who truly stood out to me; I had never noticed her before, and she seemed like a fresh face. Her radiant chocolate skin shimmered in the light, and her outfit perfectly accentuated her figure. As she applied lip gloss and adjusted her hair, she exuded a captivating charm that was impossible to ignore.
As I began to take in her features, I found myself already in the private room with Ke'Liyah. She had closed the door behind us, and my focus shifted entirely to her as she approached, the sound of her heels echoing in the stillness of the space.
I seized her by the neck, pressing my lips against hers with an intense passion. As our tongues intertwined, I lifted her by her thighs, carrying her to the bed. She eagerly tugged at my shirt and waistband, adding to the electric tension between us.
Very impatient I see I didn't waste no time I took off my shirt along with my sweats and boxers as my dick spring up hitting my stomach.
I gently withdrew from the kiss, guiding her head down with a firm yet careful hold on her hair, ensuring my grip was secure as she began to pleasure me.
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As her tongue was swirling around my tip bobbing her head up and down I thrusted my hips inside of her mouth caused me to groan in pleasure, I clenched my teeth gazing down at her seeing her take all of me inside of her warm mouth.
The warmth of her mouth wanted me bust a nut inside of her throat so fast but I needed to be in that pussy first probably been with a bunch of guys before me lucky for me I brought protection.
"You like this daddy?" She muttered. I nodded my head while I guided her head back down on me.
I pushed my dick deep inside of her throat causing her to gag on me seeing tears forming in her eyes, "mhm, just like that baby," I cooed while forcing myself not  to nut inside of her throat.
She continued to suck me up good as I kept guiding her movements on my mushroom tip, I didn't want to nut inside of her mouth—not yet so I pulled her away from my dick pushing her on the bed on all fours.
I needed to be in that.
I pushed her panties to the side while putting on a condom before sliding into her harshly and began beating her shit up, this girl didn't mean anything to me only the one that caught my eye.
It was something about her I couldn't catch before coming in this room it almost looked like she just kept to herself and didn't interact with none of the men unless it was a lap dance, I need to come back up here to see her.
I kept pushing my dick deeper inside of her as her moans were filling up the room while I pushed her head in deeper into the bed listening to her muffled moans in the sheets.
"Ouuu daddy you're so deep,"
I didn't respond while pounding her shit into an oblivion while feeling my dick twitch inside of her knowing that I was about to bust soon.
All I could think about was shawty only her I hope she'll still be here when I leave this room, I quicken my pace inside of Ke'Liyah while she was screaming from the top of her lungs.
She was enjoying this way to much, too much for my liking since I had her head mushed in so I didn't have to see her face, I felt myself letting go as I came inside of the condom.
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I pulled out from her while removing the condom from my dick seeing all of my semen inside of it, I got up from the bed placing inside of the trash can before getting myself together.
"That was quick," Ke'Liyah commented.
"Yeah, I got things to do shawty," I said while putting on my boxers along with my sweats.
"Seems, like you weren't enjoying it," I didn't respond to her as I grabbed my stuff and walked out the door leaving her dumbfounded.
As I stepped out of the private room, I noticed the guys still mingling with some girls. My focus shifted to the captivating girl I had watched earlier, dancing on the pole in a way that was unlike anything I had ever witnessed before.
She twirled gracefully around the pole, defying gravity as my gaze remained locked on her, utterly entranced by her beauty and talent. The moment our eyes met, a magnetic connection formed; her gaze held mine unwaveringly as she executed a flawless split, effortlessly transitioning into a sultry move that left me breathless.
I glanced down and realized I was aroused by her actions. I made my way to the stage, unable to take my eyes off her. As she approached, her hands explored my body, igniting a desire within me to discover everything about her.
She stands out from all the other girls in this club. As she took a seat on the stage right in front of me, she put on a captivating performance that I truly appreciated, playfully bringing her curves close as I reveled in the moment.
I gently pressed my lips against her chest for a fleeting moment before she stepped back. Seizing the opportunity, I wrapped my arms around her hips, drawing her nearer. With a tender kiss on her neck, I leaned in to whisper sweetly in her ear.
"What's yo' name mama? never seen you around here before," I whispered in her ear.
"Desiree, and you?" she said softly.
The atmosphere was alive with the vibrant sounds of 'Spin' by Megan Thee Stallion featuring Victoria Monet, creating a perfect backdrop as we locked eyes, lost in the moment together.
"My name is Joshua but people that I'm close with calls me Josh, or Jey whatever you want to call me Ma," I said.
Her smile lit up her face, and I couldn't help but think how adorable she looked. As she kept working her magic on me, I softly traced circles on her backside, savoring the moment.
I admire her body she had a great body shape everything hugged her so perfectly.
"Joshua huh? You're handsome I must say but I have to go," Desiree said as she got up from the ground, but I stopped her in her tracks.
She looked at me with a confused expression as I handed her a wad of cash along with my number tucked into her clothing. After gently kissing her hand, I said, "I'll see you again, princess," watching her walk away. I couldn't resist admiring the way her curves moved in that outfit.
I walked back over to the couches seeing the guys smirking at me.
"Yo, Uce, who was that shawty you was just talking to?" Zilla asked.
"Aye, all bets are off with her Uce," I said as I seen him roll his eyes at me.
"Man, fuck all of that, sounds like you tryna get with her and I'm tryna hit for real," was he fucking serious right now?
I just waved him off like I didn't listen to him as we continued to stay at the strip club for a little longer.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
DESIREE As I slipped into my usual attire in the locker room, I couldn't help but admire the stack of cash I had earned for the night, particularly the bills from a guy named Joshua. There was something uniquely intriguing about him—something that set him apart from every other man I had ever met.
There was something unique about his presence; it seemed as if he genuinely wanted to reach out to me. Yet, I reminded myself to guard my vulnerability and keep my emotions in check around men. It simply wasn't worth the risk.
I sensed a shove from behind, and when I turned, I found Ke'Liyah glaring at me, her face twisted in anger. In response, I shot her a fierce look, ready to stand my ground.
"Girl what?" I asked.
"New girl don't be coming up in here tryna still people's man," she said.
I raised an eyebrow at her, "excuse me? Girl he came onto me he seemed more attracted to me than you maybe your pussy wasn't good enough," I retorted as all of the girls kept their mouth shut.
I kept waving the cash he had handed me before I stepped off the stage. "Check out all this money he gave me! Did he share any with you? I doubt it—looks like you didn't impress him enough, Liyah." The more I provoked her, the angrier she became, but honestly, I couldn't care less. She was acting like they were an item or something.
I returned the money to my bag and zipped it up, but just then, she shoved me hard, igniting my anger. In a swift motion, I grabbed her by the hair, pulling her closer so our eyes locked in a fierce stare.
"Don't fucking mess with me bitch because I'm not the one," I shoved her harshly on the ground before heading out the door 'god why do I have to deal with this shit today over a man'
I climbed into the car, tossing my bags onto the backseat as I pressed the ignition button of the BMW. Running my fingers through my hair, I navigated out of the parking lot, eager to make my way home.
I reached into the glove compartment and retrieved a pre-roll blunt, seeking a moment of tranquility. With a lighter ready in my hand, I sparked it up and took a deep puff, letting the smoke ease my tension.
As I lit the candle and started my hour-long drive home, I turned on my favorite playlist on Apple Music. Yet, for some strange reason, thoughts of him kept swirling in my mind, refusing to fade away.
His striking features and the way he tenderly kissed my neck sent shivers down my spine. The sensation of his hands exploring me ignited feelings I had never experienced before. This level of affection was entirely new, and it left me utterly enchanted.
Not even from Jayden
He treated me with such calmness and tenderness that it surprised me he didn't lead me to the private rooms for intimacy. I could sense his arousal pressing against me as he drew me nearer, yet I couldn't help but wonder, 'why didn't he engage with me like the others did?' 'Why was he showing me this kind of affection? ' My mind was racing with these questions, desperately seeking clarity.
After what felt like an eternity, I finally arrived home. I retrieved my bag from the backseat and switched off the BMW with a simple push of a button before stepping into the house.
I used the key Montez had given me to unlock the door, then slipped off my shoes and neatly placed them on the shoe rack beside me. After closing the door securely, I made my way upstairs.
I stepped into my bedroom, closing the door softly behind me. Exhausted, I collapsed onto my bed, the weight of the day pressing down on me. As I rummaged through my bag, my eyes landed on his number still saved in my phone. A thought crossed my mind: 'Should I reach out to him?' I quickly dismissed it, telling myself, 'No, Desi, don't be foolish.' Yet, despite my better judgment, I found myself pulling out my phone and starting to text him.
IMESSAGE 💬 Desiree🦋: hey...is this Joshua? It's Desiree from the club? Joshua💵: What's up mamas I see you finally text me did you make it home? Desiree🦋: yeah I did Joshua💵: that's good but what's up? Desiree🦋: I wanted ask you something bout Ke'Liyah if that's okay? Joshua💵: im all ears baby
These nicknames were going to kill me if he didn't stop.
Desiree🦋: well me and her had got into it because of you saying how I shouldn't be stealing people's mans because I'm new, but did anything happen before you seen me? Joshua💵: I mean...I fucked her ofc but she came onto me I really wasn't feeling her Desiree🦋: oh why? Joshua💵: because she didn't catch my attention like you did when I left the private room Desiree🦋: me? Joshua💵: yes you, you caught my attention dancing like that on that pole Desiree🦋: it's nothing honestly just self taught honestly 😅😅 Joshua💵: mhm you was beautiful asf doing allat mama especially being all up on me like that today man you had me bricked up Desiree🦋: oh?😳 I'll take that as an compliment Joshua💵: but back on track you're saying that she's claiming me when all I did was fuck her? Desiree🦋: something like that I suppose seems like she was jealous to me Joshua💵: you gon' be at work tmr?
Why did he wanted to know that? What was he seeking out from me?
Desiree🦋: yeah to practice some new moves for tmr night why? Joshua💵: might come swing by and holla at you before I leave Desiree🦋: leaving? To where ? Joshua💵: imma professional wrestler baby doll it's my job to travel all around the world Desiree🦋: just like my best friend Bianca Joshua💵: that's yo' bestie? She talks about a certain some to my sister-in-law a lot I didn't know it was you Desiree🦋: yep that's Bianca for you 😭 Joshua💵: well imma let you get some rest beautiful Desiree🦋: kk gn Joshua💵: night 💗
As I reclined on my bed, my phone resting on my chest, disbelief washed over me. I had just texted him and engaged in a deep conversation. 'What was this overwhelming sensation he stirred within me?' 'I reminded myself not to fall for him—come on, Desi, don't be foolish; he's just going to take advantage of you.' Negative thoughts swirled in my mind, and I tried to dismiss the emotions before settling in for the night, having already showered at work.
I switched off the lamp beside me and set my phone on the small dresser, my gaze drifting up to the popcorn ceiling as my mind wandered into a sea of contemplation.
I couldn't let him not now or never no matter how friendly he seemed I'm keeping myself closed off I am a broken soul with a fucked up past trauma.
He wouldn't even know what to do with me I am not a good person to fall in love with.
I can't let him in Desiree don't do it.
As I settled into the bed, my mind wandered, leading me in and out of slumber, gently lulling me into a peaceful drift.
Don't let him in Desiree, don't
NOVACANE
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desifromtheblock: money go all around fo' me 🤭😩 biancabelairwwe: perioddd girl i love the outfit desifromtheblock: @ biancabelairwwe thank you bestie 💗 y2kjayden: you became a whore? No nigga would want to date yo' ass ke'liyahh: girl what fucking ever you just got lucky he'll show up again wanting me not you desifromtheblock: @ ke'liyah bitch go off yo' self before pressing me hon uceyjucey: sexy ass 😩😩 desifromtheblock: @ uceyjucey 👀👀
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A/n: hiiii I am back with another story i honestly got inspired by this book I am currently reading atm which made me want to do this. I hope Desiree could heal or at least open up to Jey soon.
But I hope yall enjoy this chapter lmk in the comments below
STAY UCEY
(2.)
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leashybebes · 1 day ago
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I was tagged by @typicalopposite (impulsive) and @hyperfocusthusly (fire) for this wip game.
Rules! Share one sentence or excerpt from your wip(s) that starts with each letter of your word!
Decided to make it confusing by pulling from my extremely unwieldy file with allll the wips from you plus me verse, along with the actual ongoing wips and a Super Secret project so...don't expect anything coherent, I guess!
also, at least one bit is nsfw, i sorta lost track. impulsive is a long word and i have NOTHING in the tank today.
re: nothing in the tank, i cannot even consider tagging onwards. if you see this and wanna do it, your word is heart
impulsive
i -
"I mean. I think you could make just about anything sound hot."
"Do you see how that could be a problem?"
"I - guess. But um. It's a problem in a hot way."
Tommy pinches the bridge of his nose. "Evan."
"I mean it. Um. Hold up." Buck scrolls through his phone, switching back to his notes app and, yikes, that's a mess that he will need to tidy up at some point, but he thinks he worded it pretty well in his little brain-dump earlier, so carefully filed sex notes will have to wait.
m -
"My round," Tommy says.
"I'll come with you," Eddie offers.
Buck stands up to let them out of the booth. Clearly not even thinking about it, Tommy touches his waist as he goes, a brief trail of his fingers that has Buck making what he's sure is a pretty goofy expression at Tommy's retreating back.
p -
"Put some clothes on, have a shower if you want, I'm going to make some lunch."
"Is this the famous Clipboard Buck?"
Buck's aware he's probably having what Hen would call a face journey because he wants to know who said that to Tommy, and to point out that he doesn't actually have a clipboard right now, but that he has one at the loft and he could grab it if they swung by, and he also wants to say something embarrassing about how handsome Tommy looks after a nap. He might be in danger of going full Buck here.
u -
"Uh. No. But. You know my friends."
"And soon you'll know mine." He brings Buck's hand to his lips and kisses his knuckles. "I've told them about you. They'll love you."
"Um. Um. Sure." 
Buck screams at himself to shut the fuck up because they'll love you is literally just a thing people say, and it is too goddamn early.
l -
"Love you."
"Love you too."
"Love you!" Jee chirps up, not really directed at anyone in particular, just putting it out into the universe. Buck swoops her up onto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and she shrieks with laughter. When he leans in to drop one last peck on Tommy's cheek, he hears Jee's mwah! as she lands a kiss in Tommy's hair.
s -
"She was a kid when I joined the army. I should have done better by her, but - "
"You were a kid when you joined the army," Buck counters. "I'm not mad, stop looking at me like that."
"Okay," Tommy says carefully. "You probably - "
"I mean, I am confused. Because when your dad died, we talked a lot. I thought - I thought it made us closer."
i -
"I don't wanna - "
"Sure, okay, make me say it," Tommy says with a huff that might almost be a laugh. "You've got a big dick. Just - it's good, just go slow."
"Yeah," Evan says. "Sure, of course."
He thought he was going slow, but Tommy's the boss, so he works on tiny, incremental little thrusts instead, and it feels crazy. He can feel Tommy's ass working around his cock, like it's actively trying to get him closer, further inside.
v -
Verging on tearful, Evan says, "I would have come. I would have helped."
"I know you would have. It's exactly why I didn't. Why I wouldn't let Sal."
"God, you are a stubborn asshole," Evan says, but he sounds almost impressed, now.
Tommy shrugs and snags another cookie. "These are really good."
Evan gives him a familiar, teasing glare. "For the record, I am allowing you to change the subject."
e -
"Evan, wait - "
But it's too late. Buck pulls open what appears to be Tommy's sock drawer. He's rooting around before Tommy's words can register and his fingers find it like they knew it'd be there - a box. Small and square and navy blue and unmistakable. 
"You - "
Tommy sighs and drags a hand over his face. "Surprise?" he suggests. "This really isn't how I thought this would go."
fire
f -
For a second it's their first kiss all over again, but then Tommy's free hand is preemptively cupping the back of Buck's head as he very efficiently gets Buck pinned against the wall and kisses him fervently. Buck makes a noise of surprise but then gets with the programme immediately. Tommy kisses him hard, urgent, licking into his mouth and slotting their bodies together in a way that Buck is already learning makes him melt. He winds his arms around Tommy's neck, arches into him, lets out a happy little hum.
i -
"It's up to you. I won't be offended if you just want to go sleep in your own bed, but I wouldn't have offered if I wasn't serious."
He's so fucking direct, and it makes Buck feel crazy.
"I don't want to sleep in my own bed," he says, and wants to curl into himself and disappear. It's too much and too honest and too intense and too early and too Buck. 
r -
Reflexively, he notes Evan very deliberately not looking at the cane, probably trying to reconcile the man who walked out of his loft eight years ago with it, and with the glasses, and the decrease in muscle mass and the more grey than not in his hair. He decides to give him an out.
"Congratulations on the promotion," he says. "You deserve it."
e -
Evan holds out  an honest-to-god printed list. Lists, Tommy realizes as he takes hold of the paper, and sees that it's multiple sheets. The first is titled non-sexual intimacy, the second date night ideas, the third mutual self-disclosure. Evan's hand covers his, settling the rising itch of panic he's barely had time to notice.
"Slow down," Evan tells him. "Your pace, remember?"
Part of Tommy hates the feeling of being handled. Another part of him, the part he's trying to lean into, wants it desperately. Wants to be treated carefully, treated with care.
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horse-girl-anthy · 2 days ago
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this is gonna be an off the cuff ramble/vent so don't read if that doesn't interest you.
I am thinking I'm going to back away from Ikuhara fandom in the next six months (coinciding with when I finish the rewatches I'm doing in my server). I feel like I've exhausted what I have to say about his shows, and I've also developed a very specific way of understanding them which clashes with others. I'm torn between feeling like it's worth trying to delineate my own understanding and feeling that I'm just being territorial, pedantic, or close minded. at a certain point, even if I could be proved "right" on my interpretations, I'm losing the enjoyment I should have in the stories by caring what other people think about them. at the moment, I'm thinking I want to flesh a couple more ideas and then let it rest. I'll always be grateful to Ikuhara and happy I put time into this blog, but nothing lasts forever.
so all of that to say... I was on the fence about writing what I'm about to write. I recommend people who don't want to read someone objecting to common RGU fan interpretations to just check out now. I'm not trying to start anything. but after reflecting on it, I decided it to share my thoughts on this topic; I think it's worth saying, even if it makes me look contrarian or problematic.
---
I watched RGU in 2014, right as the western fandom was experiencing a shift in how it approached the show. I won't detail all that went on during that time--today I'm specifically interested in two characters: Nanami and Miki.
before, I'd say the fandom was overall less critical. things were taken more at face value. for instance, Nanami was not always taken seriously, while characters like Miki, just because they were "nice," were seen as "good guys." however as time's wore on, there's been a backlash to that way of approaching the show. the characters most likely to have received misogynistic hate in the past (Anthy, Shiori, Nanami, and Kozue, mainly) were reinterpreted, while "good guy" characters were increasingly scrutinized.
that was a good thing, as it was a counterbalance to the previous attitude. however, it's been more than a decade since I joined the fandom, and I still see people talking like it's 2014. the way that people have reinterpreted the anime has, often, not resulted in interesting readings. this is because people are still applying an ideological lens to the story, rather than engaging with how it presents itself.
I specifically want to highlight Nanami in this regard. I check the RGU tag almost every single day, and I have seen scores of posts which are nigh-identical to each other. it's always people talking about how she's a "calf to the slaughter," she's actually a victim, etc. and I just... don't get anything out of it.
I think a lot of this shift began with this essay series called Palace Perspective. it's been a long time since I read it--actually before my Utena renaissance--but I didn't like it at the time. it was written in this very self-serious style, and all I remember it arguing was "Nanami is a victim, Touga is a bad guy." I'd loved the Touga/Nanami relationship since I first watched RGU, and that was never how I felt about it. Touga certainly harms Nanami, but based on the series itself, it seemed to me that in large part, Touga was the victim, and Nanami was harmed by his victimization.
anyway, since around the time that essay series came out, people have had this attitude of "actually Nanami is a very deep character, you guys," as if it needs to be repeated over and over. and there's a denial that Nanami is a comic relief character--"actually her being funny is just a ruse because the show is camouflaging that she's a victim!" okay, yes, they do lure you in to Nanami's story slowly; she's initially silly, but all along hiding under that was some serious shit. I'm not denying that. but I'm also not buying that line entirely.
the Shadow Girls do an entire play about how Nanami's comedic suffering is the result of her own actions (they call it "divine justice"). take episode 16 specifically. yes, we have Nanami dreaming about being a calf for the slaughter. that is a great scene and indicative of the unhealthy relationship between her and Touga. but isn't the crux of the episode that Nanami is making a fool of herself??? she tries to one-up Juri at a party. her failure to realize what the cowbell is highlights her ignorance. the show is absolutely poking fun at her. you can go into why Nanami ended up this way, but I don't understand how we've gotten to the point where people are so over-serious about Nanami--and RGU in general--that they can't laugh at it.
I'll take a detour here to talk about Miki. it's become increasingly popular to frame him as a sexist--I've even seen him termed a "raging misogynist." he gets blamed for his strained relationship with his sister and written off as "just as bad as the other male characters." that's another case where I really don't see it. or at least, I feel like people have lost track of degrees in these things. Miki seems unsure of what he believes, sometimes expressing progressive views but other times regressive ones, and he does act within a patriarchal system. but does he comport himself that badly? or is he just a normal 13-year-old boy who falls into temptation?
I want to make a comparison between him and Nanami here. I think you could make a very real case that Nanami has far more sexist beliefs than Miki. she treats every female character as competition, as a hussy out to steal her brother. when she finds out the truth about Anthy and Akio, she immediately jumps to victim blaming Anthy. and another thing: Nanami plays princess.
the fact that so many people write about Nanami but this aspect of her character is rarely commented on is mind boggling. it's like, her whole thing. Nanami wants to be the center of the universe; Touga is her everything and she wants to possess Touga. she constantly acts the victim and tries to manipulate things so her enemies look like the villain.
I'm not saying this to shit on Nanami! I love Nanami, she's one of my favorite characters of all time! but I've found it alienating to be in a fandom where whitewashing is framed as appreciation. even her backstory: people make post after post about how it wasn't Nanami's fault she killed the cat, because she's a victim. here's the problem with that: why are we engaging with the story on the level of blame? I recently read an essay on methods of analysis that placed "vilification and heroization" as the lowest form of engagement with fiction. I understand why someone would want to defend a character from attack, but aside from like, youtube comments or old forum posts, who exactly is attacking Nanami? and also, how is saying "actually she's a victim so that explains everything" accomplishing anything?
I am being unfair here, because some people do engage with the work enough to say more than that. people will point to the neglect Nanami experienced as the cause of her behavior. that's there, it's certainly there. I'm not objecting to serious attempts to explain character motivation in reaction to vilifiction, but more to the impulse to try to paint characters as morally pure. isn't Nanami so great because she's so complicated? when people approach the story with the drive to whitewash, so much of the nuance and feeling of the work goes unnoticed. episode 31 and 32 do portray Nanami as a victim (of Touga and of her parents and of Akio). however, they also portray Nanami's motivations, and not all of them are pretty. over the course of the arc, you watch her entire worldview fall apart. it doesn't matter whether it's "her fault" she has that worldview--the process is painful and humiliating either way.
all of this carries through to how people react to both Nanami's final scene in the show and her comic relief section in the film. the comic relief scene is bad because it doesn't take Nanami seriously enough, while her final scene is bad because it shows her waiting on Touga and Saionji, which is sexist because she's partaking in traditional gender roles. the only way I can understand those reactions is that people didn't actually pay attention to how she was portrayed in the show, as a comic relief character or as a serious character. I'd understand the objection if Anthy's final scene involved her waiting on Akio, but Anthy and Nanami are different characters (I also don't get much out of the endless Anthy/Nanami posts because of how they are flattened in comparisons). unlike Anthy, Nanami spent the entire show demanding to be waited on, but when we see her for the last time, she's contentedly serving others. that is called character development.
I wanted to highlight Miki and Nanami because I feel they point to a major problem of the fandom: the maintenance of the prince and the princess, just with new definitions. the prince is bad, masculine, harmful, and needs to be rejected. the princess is good, feminine, eternally victimized, and above question. I find this sad because I thought we were supposed to be transcending the gender binary. I know saying this makes me sound anti-feminist, but I'm not. I'm not saying "oh we need to transcend the gender binary by never criticizing men or ignoring how women are victimized"; that would be stupid. but my vision of feminism is vigilantly critical of all things, evaluates each situation on an individual basis, and avoids self-flattery and self-deception.
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kingofthering · 2 days ago
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Hi guys, I am back ✨
First of all, I wanted to thank you all for the support and all the kind messages I received when my account was terminated (and all the offers to help me find my content on this website), I really appreciated that. I wish I cared less about something as silly as tumblr, but alas, here we are.
Blogs wise, I'm going to keep @kingofthering-two on the side, in case something happens here (again). It's a blog I'll aways keep free of strikable posts so it should always be a safe place to fall back on.
Additionally, to be precautious, I'm going to create an archive blog on a separate account. I'll share it once everything has been stored over.
Another thing I'm going to do is amend the post I made in December on how to deal with strikes and add things I've learned in the last couple of weeks. I'll reblog it when it's ready.
What about giffing here? So. I know what's safe and what isn't so obviously the safe content isn't even a question. Regarding the rest (essentially, things coming from videopass), I'm partially torn because fighting strikes is both stressful and exhausting but there is also the fact that in December they striked posts I created in April (8 months prior) so considering the fact that I'll never be fully safe unless I deleted everything after the content has been archived on another blog, well. (I did consider that option at one point but I'm not really fond of it, I'll admit).
I don't know yet if I want to discuss the Dorna strikes matter with Tumblr now or if I want to see if I'm good or I receive another strike (and then you can be sure I'll ask tumblr how come they're still accepting claims from an entity that couldn't back up their claims on 7 different occasions with my blog, and many more times with others). A small part of me is still worried that Tumblr would say something to Dorna (probably very unlikely but, you know) (and as painful as fighting the strikes is, at least we know it's always a working process for now). Thoughts to be had, at some point.
Anyway, I'm happy to be back here. There are a couple of things that I want to see to take care of in the upcoming days / weeks including publishing the recs of Nov / Dec 2024, treating the results of the 2024 MotoGP RPF Survey (still open), posting my MotoGP & F1 2025 seasons journals on Etsy, etc
It seems that I might have lost some of my followers (including mutuals) in the process of my blog going away and coming back. The notifications I'm receiving are not exactly coinciding with other stuff so I'm a little unsure about that. Going to post this in the MotoGP tag just to be cautious.
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bloopitynoot · 3 days ago
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Reading TGCF: Chapter Eleven
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For those who don't know, I am reading TGCF for the first time and sharing my thoughts!
If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.
Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag Bloopitynoot reads TGCF. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read BUT if you followed along with my SVSSS read, the rules and vibe are the same.
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Surprise! It is not masala chai; today I have a regular black tea with milk and sugar.
In other news, in celebration of finishing book one I have purchased book 3! It should get here Friday, and I can't wait. Shout out to my manager for fueling my habits with the indigo gift card she gave me for Christmas.
Let's go chapter 11!!!!!!!!
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They better stop! coming on immediately so strong with the most sincere and heartfelt title calling!! p355
"You were the groom?" he's saying these things like this man doesn't want to wife him right now. Xie Lian LOL watch what you're saying. p356
This chapter is too much. My heart! The flirting! "May I take these words as a compliment?" Can't you tell they're compliments? p357
Again mxtx and the worlds most complicated characters. Making me feel things, and second guess everyone's motivations. Re: Banyue telling xie lian and hua cheng that General Pei Jr isn't a bad person. p359
If Hua Cheng and Xie Lian both picked their fake names from the same poem, I hereby declare them soulmates. No take backs, it's done. p360
You know what, if all else fails, Xie Lian would make an excellent motivational speaker. "I want to save the common people" "Do what you think is right" "Nothing can block your way" The cutest little "hang in there" cat poster embodied. p361
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THE CHEEK POKE! Followed by "Not bad" I am wheezing! This awkward man. p363
Oh no, my emotions. Hua Cheng about his true face, "I'll let you see it someday, if there's a chance" p364
"those were good words" poor baby flustered xie lian. He cannot handle a single sincere compliment from Hua Cheng. The pillow talk in this chapter is so dang cute! p367
Here I am reading these words and lowkey hoping that it was Hua Cheng who Xie Lian told to "live for him". My biggest question at this point in the series is why/when/how did Huan Cheng become so into Xie Lian. It feels like he's known this guy for a very long time. p368 (do not actually tell me this. it'll probably be revealed later, but with Xie Lian, unreliable narrator, I feel like it'll be right before the extras LOL).
BRO LEFT HIM. WITH A PROMISE THEY WOULD MEET SINCERELY AGAIN. AND LEFT HIM A RING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG this is so precious, TOO MUCH. p372
I totally thought the end of this chapter would ruin me
I was NOT wrong, but it was in a very unexpected way! I expected tragedy and I got the cutest fucking pillow talk, a PROMISE and a RING. WHAT.
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applepixls · 2 days ago
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foreign to me to not be writing everything in the tags but here we go rdgjmkh
your poetry is so visceral and beautiful to me and its so cool seeing quotes i recognize :))
these are the vibes i get from all the quotes :)
etho's fits so well to me and particularly reminds me of the scene in liml where he's talking to scar, bdubs and cleo after they've all died, about his regrets and if they'd try again
gem's has such the right vibe for her, its violent and like shes aware of something higher than herself in this hellscape
scar's. you. the things that first sentence did to me. it definitely brings the image of him in sl after winning and how all he's wanted is to live but after winning there's a sort of realization that he doesn't want to live without other people and.. that the win is almost like a punishment for how he tried to game the system? since 3l he promised not to kill if [insert conditions] and its like the game is finally bringing that to a head and punishing him
impulse's has a bitter, wise, melancholy feel i dont associate with hermitcraft impulse but its all about the circumstances that have made him this way
martyn's i have nothing better to say but i hope you know how well it fits
lizzie's reminds me of some of hers and jimmy's s1 esmp lore about being sea creatures that came from eggs and it has the same vibe as her saying "so i left this world just as i entered it; confused"
mumbo's has the sort of resignation of someone used to being thrown around like a ragdoll. others will try to fight the rules and win together or not kill or sacrifice themselves and some play into them aggressively and kill indiscriminately. mumbo on the other hand seems to accept this is how he lives now.
pearl's her quote encompasses a feeling i am very familiar with, that all the evidence suggests you are something to be killed or hated but despite it all, you. just. want. to. be. loved.
skizz's suits him so well. it isnt naive, blind hope. its a hope that's seen adversity and persists anyway. (i thank you so much for sharing the story behind this poem <3)
scott's poem has a sort of peace to it, an awareness of higher beings, like he knows after all the suffering it will end. and he holds on for that time
joel's feels like being pulled into the undertow. it reminds me of falling face first into the pacific ocean as a kid (it was very funny but also not). it feels like a sort of awareness that you put yourself into this situation in the first place, you're reaping what you sow but. it still hurts (i loved this poem when you shared it. i saw it at a time when i was going through a lot of change and it kinda made me see it in a different way, it gave me a fun image of floorboards being pried up and replaced)
tango's feels bitter to me. but it has the feeling of,,, never learning your lesson. like saying "I'll never do that again" and then doing it the next week. like by the end of one season saying "I've had enough im not teaming with them again" like scar and grian after 3l but by the time the next season rolls around and by the end of the first session some arrangement of best or ties has reassembled themselves.
cleos to me has a very similar feeling to scott's. and I've figured out the word for it. in universe, its like faith. the belief in a sort of better peaceful afterlife. and the surity that when you make it through it will be better. no matter how hellish your life may be
saw this post assigning devastating quotes to each life series members, got incredibly inspired, and decided to try my own hand at it but specifically with snippets of the poetry ive personally written throughout the years :] thoughts and musings on several of my choices will be under the cut if you're interested in that sorta thing!! Enjoy<3
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Bdubs: "it's all so blue. so blue, so wet, so cold, but you've got a fire in your heart like a hundred rockets. you aren't hungry, but you could eat the dead, / cut your teeth on a rotting corpse."
BigB: "SOMETHING HAS FRACTURED HERE AND IT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN. EACH DAY YOU WILL CHASE THE FAULT LINES LOOKING FOR A BRIDGE ONLY TO FIND IT ALREADY BURNT."
Etho: "I am above myself, hovering, pressing pale fingers into the dull bruise of yesterday to test its lingering ache. Is this all that's left?"
Gem: "what are gods if not the mothers of our own inventions. we are the avatars of violence and love and hope and fear in equal measure."
Scar: "I think I want to live. I know one day, I must die. In the cosmic wheel of fortune, I am a gamble in the making, gentle breath washing a little luck over the dice."
Grian: "Within the shape of my clawed fingers are knives: scrabbled dirt; scarlet lines; the escape route / Between a fence and / Tall grasses."
Impulse: "Life's bitter, stilted offering / Is that every person we meet / Will one day become a perfect stranger."
Martyn: "Dangerous beasts must earn / Their survival. / You are no different than a knife / In the hands of murderers."
Lizzie: "When I think of the egg-tooth, / I revel in purple glass; the lightning; the shatter; the knife-slip between / Death, and a wake."
Mumbo: "This is your life now, / Found in the cracks and crevices, scraps pried between laughter and reckless abandon."
Pearl: "I am begging, raw in the face of absolution— do not hate me. Please, keep watering me in your garden, / Despite how closely my heart resembles a weed."
Ren: "— and sometimes hearts are forged in violence /— and sometimes blood cannot form scabs / — and sometimes wounds carry half-hearted sutures / — and we are all but living fragments / —"
Skizz: "Just a little longer. Please. / There is light pooling at the bottom of the flower vase."
Scott: "I can only hope that with the rising of the dawn / I will pass through darkness and return to day, / Where I am a solar ray blinding— teeth and claws sharpened, the stretch of my skin carrying gold / Above the dull, dug out earth"
Joel: "Tamed by nothing, no one, I lose myself to the shattered chains; / Yes, there is a loss."
Jimmy: "for year after bloody year, i clung to life with aching fingernails, grasped at every straw, took every scrap of double-barrelled hope and shot myself in the chest with it."
Tango: "every time you claw yourself from the ashes you insist it will never happen again. every time you reach the breaking point, it happens a little bit faster."
Cleo: "It's about catharsis, not letting go. / Because a part of me wants to hold this, / A swelling hurt deeper than tides, / Hotter than stars. The kind of rage / A mother might raise against her own child."
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I dont share my poetry on here very often, partially because it tends to end up coming from a very personal part of me, but since this was actually a lot of fun maybe i'll start posting my poems more often here :]] i think what i found most interesting about this exercise was that as i scrolled my notes app and cherry-picked quotes for each character, it felt like the ones i chose naturally became part of a larger conversation-- as if the characters were speaking to me through my own words about their lowest points, about their ultimate views on the games filtered through the lens of a red life.
It felt enlightening; i dont often feel like im speaking to characters or being informed about their plots/preferences, etc. the way many other writers discuss in workshops or casually online, but by the end of this exercise i felt like i just... understood them, better than i had before. There's something inexplicable about reading your own words and consciously finding ways to apply them in a way that encapsulates them down to a character's core that just... truly highlights the specific qualities that resonate most with you. And i think stumbling upon that organically was a very vivid and incredible experience for me
Admittedly, i did struggle on Scott, Ren, and Etho a lot-- im not as familiar with them as characters, and for a while i couldn't quite pinpoint what exact themes they tend to carry with them throughout all their life seasons. But when i started to really look at everyone's quotes as a whole, i realized they felt like a story, like the response to a question-- as if i was being TOLD what they felt and how, and that that was how i needed to frame the rest of my selections. So Scott's ended up being about control, and the desperate hanging onto of it; Ren's is about the acceptance and bitterness of what he cannot change; Etho's is a quiet resignation rounded out with softer disbelief. The more i looked at these choices, the more they felt correct to me-- and while i still think i have a ways to go before i fully understand these characters, i feel like this has helped me a lot with that ultimate goal :]
Of all these poetry snippets, though, i think Scar, Skizz, and Joel's are my absolute favorites. Skizz's poem is actually the whole poem in its entirety (as is Cleo's, funnily enough)-- it's a short, very simple poem that is incredibly close to my heart for many reasons, but the main one being because it was written at one of my lowest points a few years back. Its about clawing for hope when there isnt any, and finding even the smallest of beautiful things to hold onto, and begging yourself to keep holding onto that at any cost. The pure, clean beauty of watching light refract through a vase of flowers, and knowing that sometimes, that's all there is to live for-- I felt like that really spoke to Skizz's life series character as a whole: finding the beauty in every tiny thing, no matter how small, and scrabbling for more time to appreciate it.
Scar's snippet comes from a much longer poem of mine about the difficulty of reconciling the idea of a future when you havent had to think of one before (incidentally, Etho's snippet comes from this poem as well). I think out of everyone, this quote encapsulates him the best; i like how it subtly references that inner well of vivacity he draws from that many other characters struggle to find, and how that in turn ties in with the lore that he never died a final death during Secret Life. And i love how it simultaneously manages to encompass the way he utilizes the social game in each season as well-- Scar's an incredibly intelligent social player, and i think the imagery of a gambler breathing their luck over the dice as they cast it, and as he casts himself at others for alliances and enemies, truly does fit him.
As for Joel, the full poem his quote comes from is one im particularly proud of, especially for its final lines. I think, quite honestly, i can let this poem stand for itself in its entirety:
They say transformation is letting the light in, But in my mind it's a violence. A coarseness, a fracturing, the bloody vowels between a scream And a howl. How do you transform without killing yourself? When I am a lion, my hands and feet Grow claws; my teeth sharpen. No longer do I spark— I ignite. Tamed by nothing, no one, I lose myself to the shattered chains; Yes, there is a loss. To transform is to leave behind a body And eat its still-breathing corpse.
I find myself referencing this poem a lot even in my daily life-- as longterm readers of mine already know, one of my favorite themes is that of replacing yourself and permanent transformation. This poem really is just about how changing, in any shape or form, alters you forever; how you can look back on yourself from even just a few months ago and feel like a completely different person despite remaining the same. Connecting it with Joel's character, and how he acts during his red lives in each season, was a natural and intuitive progression once i really sat and thought about it.
Alright thats enough yapping from me 😂😂😂 im not used to writing meta nor delving into my poetry on here, so this was a bit of an experimental post for me. If youve read up until this point, i both applaud your patience and really hope you enjoyed this window into my personal works and thoughts on them :]] cheers, and thanks to @/chipperchemical the op of the original post for inspiring me!!!❤️❤️❤️
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cookinary · 2 years ago
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Werewolf Chai AU
Some people were curious so here’s what I got so far for this AU!
SPOILERS FOR HI-FI RUSH AND THE POST-GAME, PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK
So a few months after the post-game, the second SPECTRA computer gets plugged back in (probably by a clumsy bot or something)
AI Kale gets back online and starts plotting for revenge
He manages to get his hands on Chai (he either get some bots to kidnap Chai or he mind-controls him just enough to lead him where he wants)
Instead of simply using Chai to do his bidding, AI Kale decides to "upgrade" Chai
He turns him into a cybernetic werewolf like Roquefort
And cranks the mind-control up to 11
.
In his wolf form, Chai still has his music player visible in his chest (it looks tiny tho)
His robot arm/paw is aesthetically different from his normal arm/paw
He can still summon his guitar but it's HUGE now
Instead of using the little grabby thingy as a base, he straight up uses a steel beam
Talk about heavy bass
AAAAYYYYYYYY
.
In his human form, Chai does not look that different
But since he's full cyber/robot now, he has junction (? is that the correct word?) lines visible all over his body like Roquefort does
They glow orange/yellow tho!
.
Anyway, AI Kale sends Chai to get rid of the gang
It takes a moment for everyone to realize that "Oh shit, that huge cyber wolf is actually our beloved moron"
They can't fight Chai head on (Chai is already crazy powerful, now imagine him with Roquefort's strength) so they decide to go and destroy the SPECTRA computer instead
They do that by leading wolf Chai down to the secret room
And tricking him into crashing into the computer, effectively destroying it for good and freeing Chai from the mind control
.
Chai actually finds his new body and powers pretty fucking cool
This ends up with him becoming even more fearless and excited when it comes to dealing with enemies
Much to everyone's dismay
"Chai, this Kem-Ono is highly unstable, you should—"
"I'M GONNA HUG IT"
"CHAI—"
Some things are subject to change but I think this is a solid base so here you go
I don’t have art for it yet but I’ll try to doodle some concepts between school work and stuff!
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marigraphia · 2 months ago
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I've had this pose ref saved for a while and the Superman set photos just gave off the same energy 👉🏻👈🏻
The reference is this photo of Katharine Hepburn as Antiope and Colin Keith-Johnston as Theseus in the 1932 play 'The Warrior's Husband' (and I'd love for people to turn into a draw your otp meme pls pls pls this pose is so good)
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And also, of course, the Superman (2025) set photos
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#superfamilyweek#superman#dcu#clois#lois lane#clark kent#i was actually gonna post this a few days ago but then i found out about the superfamily week#it wasn't made for it but i hope you can accept this humble offering even if it doesn't really fit the prompts#art#digital#fanart#live-action#dc#regular#final#colour#this actually from june when the set photos came out and i just got completely obsessed and went into a clois haze#it all looks so good though!! the whole thing!!!! i'm vibrating with excitement just thinking about it!!!!!!!#if this film isn't good i'm gonna be sooo disappointed you guys have no idea how much i'm looking forward to it#but anyway. ART RAMBLES: as i mentioned on the tags of my last drawing this piece gave me SUCH a headache#i think it's probably cos it was just supposed to be a quick sketch so i used a more stable pencil brush#but then i really liked it so i decided to properly colour it instead of just doing the watercolour thing i usually do for sketches#but with finished pieces i like the lineart to be kinda messy and the sketch to even show through bit#and since i used the more stable brush for the sketch it ended up looking WAY too clean. not like my stuff at all.#so i just started throwing stuff at the wall to see what could make it more interesting. full background! actual lineart! texture layers!#and this here is what i was the happiest with. i don't... love it though. it should be looking way more interesting given the pose#and then i also did the purge girl halfway through this and it looked SO good right out of the bat (pun intended)#so i went a bit into a spiral. did some realistic stuff i'll post soon. and now am trying out a thick black lineart style.#(i'll definitely still use the coloured lines for the sketchy watercolour stuff though. it just looks way too cute)
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