The writers of s11 were cowards. If IIIIIIIIIII was in charge I'd made Lucifer's weird obsession with Sam show up more. Like the writers have very obviously included it and yet when Lucifer is processing the same vessel as cas, and therefore pretending to be cas, he just fucks off and tortures Crowley with fucked up bdsm pet play.
Like the few times casifer and Sam interacted were GOLD. because Sam sees it as his best friend cas, and Lucifer (who keeps talking about Sam like they're toxic ex's) is pretending to be him!! Although not to well. Like his freaky smirk when sending Dean into the past and coming back to harass Sam? Dude lives off of sadistic pleasure.
The way he full on LAUGHS when Sam says he trusts him bc Sam thinks it's cas?? Like gold!?!? Don't know why the writers didn't do more with that.
Also why not do more with the 'lucifer sent Sam visions to get him down to hell'. Like Lucifer is Obsessed w/ sam because that body/vessel is "supposed to be" his. And yet after revealing himself he doesn't try and convince Sam anymore?
He's just given up? Like nah man I don't believe that. I feel like he woulda fucked with Sam more in cas' body. And like it woulda been a way better not-romance-romance plot then whatever the fuck Dean and Amara were..
Like that came outta no where... I mean I get it.. but ew?? We saw her grow up, and maybe id argue "well there were two versions of her!! One physical on earth, the other her actual form and memories as a celestial being!!" BUT NO. SHE CALLS CROWLEY UNCLE CROWLEY.
cause he like raised her for a day or wtv..
Idk s11 is better than s10. Like the episode from baby's prospective?? PEAK CINEMAAAA!! also not that I dislike s11, no I quite love it, I just wish the dean plots were more fleshed out, and that it was more "Dean and Sam vs the world!!" Then Dean vs Sam yk??
Like where's my dynamic duo??
That's part of why I didn't like s10. Like no I loved the IDEA of Mark of Cain dean, and demon dean was hilarious (although I HATE him) but it was just Dean vs Sam, Dean vs cas, Dean vs the world. And idk I liked the idea, cause this time it was sam doing everything to save Dean, but man I just didn't like the fighting..
Also s11 had a mention of TMNT, S10 did not so... points!!
S1 and 2 of spn were peak ofc, and s3 was good but not really memorable for me?? Idk I'll go back and rewatch once I finish the series (just finished s11)
S4 and 5 were also really good, we got Castiel who is peak, blood junkie Sam, which was one of my favorite plots!! And of course a lot more bobby. Rest in peace king!
And unlike some I loveeeed s6-7 like.. the soulless plot, and death? Dean dealing with soulless sam?? Chefs kiss I mean mwah. Then Sam tweaking because of hallucinations. NOT TO MENTION GODSTIEL?? loved him sm stg.
8-9-10 is where it kinda fell off. I mean idk the leviathans?? Weak. Hated them ngl. Idk if they were s7 but either way.. mid. I didn't like purgatory bc no way Sam would do that?? But I did like how it developed deans character..
I don't remember what happened in what season but I lovedddd kevin, hated metatron (but in the "it's because he's well done" kinda way), the tablets were aight, Mark of Cain was uh... something.. (I hate demon dean but he was peak..)
So like idk.. show is peak though, I'm just at that point in the hyperfixtion where it's like "BUT I COULD DO IT BETTER!!" ykwim?? NVM I'm sick with a fever, supernatural is all I have going for me man.
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My thoughts on Flipside
Class of 09 Flipside was hilarious, but I don't think it approaches the original or reup in quality.
I don't think it's because the main character is Jecka, or anything. Honestly, Jecka is the best part of the game, she's consistently good whether it be in jokes or likeability. The side characters just don't... live up to her though. Aside from her it's just Nicole, Jeffery, her dad and Kelly. I don't think Nicole is very good in this game, Jeffery and her dad are rather one note as expected and Kelly... unfortunately stars in the weakest route by far and does not much even there. Barely any Emily and Ari, no Kylar, no Karen. No Kyle. Jecka's great and carries herself quite well throughout the game, but she feels really alone narratively. This could be a conscious choice, as she goes through most of her troubles as a lonely girl without anyone to rely on, but I think they could've made that point without sacrificing the interest that comes with everyone surrounding her. Most of her interactions either use the other characters as jokes or to elevate her story, which wasn't how 09 or reup felt. Nicole got to try out new things thanks to all the weirdos she was surrounded with giving her new ways to have fun, whereas Jecka only really has Jeffery and her dad in that way, and she feels trapped no matter what she does. She didn't seem that way in the first twk games, but I suppose you could say those were not about her. I think the fact that you can't see her mom even on the school routes speaks volumes though.
Every ending is there just to shock you, and I'm not saying this because there's no happy endings or anything, the first two barely had those. It's more like... the endings feel like they barely have anything to do with the routes they come from? Why does the foot route end with... that? It's just out of nowhere. Not to mention the deal with the whole FYE route. I don't think there's anything redeeming about that one, it doesn't even feel like it belongs to the same world. And the way the game cheapens one of the best endings in the original by just, inserting Jecka. Which is something people have wanted for a while now, but I don't think the idea was done justice. It feels like a cheap "here you go" moment to me. It's really upsetting because I feel like the game could have gone in a ton of great places, but there's barely any choices or routes and the abrupt, weird endings just feel like a slap on the face even to the ones that were given. I think the best route was the one about drinking because it felt honest to Jecka's character and the ending was something I could've actually foreseen in one of the earlier games. After that it's the one with Jeffery, but I'm kind of iffy on that because I don't think Nicole would do that. Not for any moral reasons but more due overall disgust. Feels inconsistent with her presently given character.
The writing feels overall different imo. It's hard to put a finger on it, because it definitely relies on the same formula it had in the previous entries, but nothing in Flipside packs the same emotional punch. The humor is fairly good, but it's not spectacular like the first two games were for me. I still laughed out a few times though, since this is right up my alley.
I'm still happy I saw it, because it was quite fun... But it wasn't really more than that. It just felt like a humor piece. I don't know what spoke out to me in the first two VN's, but I don't think Flipside has it. And honestly, considering it true to these two (canon, ig?) lessens their value for me due to the shift in the thematics and I guess writing, so I think I'll ignore it when I think about the series in general. Which is such a shame, because I want to love it, it's just... not there.
It's definitely worth the time to check it out either way though. Again, pretty funny. This is what I felt about it, and I wanted to get my thoughts out. Since it's so early in its release, I've tried to avoid putting any spoilers in the post. Maybe someone will read it and appreciate, idk. Drunk driving rules.
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Okay, this is the conclusion to my posts about Sophia Stewart. I'll never do something like this again
Everything I've posted is from her own book or her web presence btw. That's all I'm drawing from and if anyone tells me any information about her they gained any other way I'll block them immediately so uh, don't
Towards the end she reveals some of her other pitches. By showing she copywrote sequels to the Matrix and Terminator
Lots of strange details here - she wrote The Matrix 4 in 2000? They didn't even start filming The Matrix 2 & 3 until 2001. Also, we can see in this book that her pitch has nothing to do with The Matrix or Terminator, but she claims she wrote direct sequels to both?
(Her explanation for how both very different films are ripping off her work - a 1:1 copy, she claims - is, hilariously, that The Terminator plagiarizes it front to back, while The Matrix plagiarizes it back to front. What?)
But also she didn't write it. She registered copyright on a synopsis for The Matrix 4. She has concepts of a plan for a Matrix 4.
The book ends with a pitch for another...she calls it a book, but it's a movie pitch? And this, too, is just a synopsis for some grand epic series, light on detail of character and plot and heavy with lore and rants (in this case, primarily about God and Adam & Eve). Of course her exhaustively long but barely sketched-out epic movie pitch has a prologue, which is also full of Christian-tinged Ancient Aliens pyramid power woo.
Sophia Stewart is unimportant, bc she represents a class of writer. Writers who have Ideas. Who have outlines and plot points but no real story, bc they never write it. But they think just having Really Good Ideas is enough - that you should get credit for coming up with a good idea for a story, regardless of if you make an actual story out of it. They're a "writer", but they never write. Despite this they often have a deep case of Dunning-Kruger, churning out outlines that leave out basic details like "what happens in the climactic battle" and the personalities of characters while insisting that an inability to author anything shouldn't keep you from being praised as a genius author
If that type of person is lucky enough to have money, they become a studio executive or tech guy, both professions awash in the uncreatively creative, or they hire ghostwriters. If they're not, they become the type of person to file spurious lawsuits under the misapprehension they own basic plot concepts. It's the "I coulda made the majors!" of writing, except, you know. Baseball players who didn't make the majors still actually played baseball at some point. I assume from now on all those types will just pump their outline into ChatGPT and try to sell the gunk it slops out and then claim they 'wrote' it so uh, uhhhhhhhhhhhh
The only reason I made these posts was discovering the conspiratorial angle to her work, bc who cares if a major studio has to deal with a spurious lawsuit? That was the part that actually sucks. But also, she does a lot of press: profiles on news websites, podcasts, that documentary was even made by other filmmakers, who actually make films. It's persisted from blogs and chain emails all the way to podcasts and TikToks. All of this uncritically spreads her story, but I also have to ask: how many actual African-American science fiction writers do those platforms profile? How many of them get documentaries made about their work? How much air is being sucked out of the room by the decades long misinformation about the "true" creator of The Matrix? And why is that misinformation so persistent when it takes a trivial amount of effort to find out it just isn't true? It feels good to support the underdog against the big studio, but in this case it just isn't true.
The sad truth is a lot more Hollywood plagiarism cases look like this than are real exposures of wrongdoing, but people tend to accept them at face value since they feel like a little guy taking on a corporation, though in reality it's just two writers suing each other. Take The Holdovers case, where people immediately turned on it, but if you look into it, the two scripts have very little in common, and the accusing writer makes odd claims like a human character in The Holdovers being a ripoff of a billboard in his script.
Or look at Groundhog Day, which was accused of plagiarism by Richard A. Lupoff, writer of the story "12:01 P.M.". The two stories have nothing in common besides a time loop; in Groundhog Day he's reliving a day, in 12:01 PM he's reliving an hour. Groundhog Day is a romcom, 12:01 P.M. plays it for horror. Groundhog Day never reveals the source of its lop but it's clearly fantastical in nature, 12:01 P.M. is explicitly science fiction. In Groundhog Day he escapes the loop, in 12:01 P.M. he never does. You can't deny Lupoff felt personally slighted, but at the end of the day, a world where a writer could own the concept of time loops would be a dystopia where creativity and art would die.
But even though they were wrong, The Holdovers & Groundhog Day cases were based on real works of writing that existed. They were based on a real, if misguided, sense of violation from the writers. But in this case, we have a mere outline of a story with not even basic similarities to the stories she's claiming are a 1:1 copy of her work, and decades of media appearances based on exploiting a community college media student's mistake in 2004. Anyway seems bad
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i think even though cas was in there stealing the journal, i think he was trying to legitimately convince dean to come to his side, because he does it the Very next episode (although he doesnt seem to realize that hes being manipulative about it..im not trying to infantilize him i just remember him being confused/surprised when dean points out that crowley gave him the same line)
like i do think theres a bit of double think in how castiel acts and behaves and he doesnt seem to grasp the emotional consequences of his actions, especially in this season.
like he thinks hes saying "if you trust me (please trust me) i can get crowley to release lisa and ben, because you wont be a threat anymore to his plan"
but dean hears "if you want lisa and ben back, you'll have to fall in line"
thats not to say dean is wrong for hearing it like that, but castiel really seems to be struggling with communication because he did this all for dean (in his mind) and once it's all over everything will be fine, lucifer and michael will stay in their cage, and dean and lisa will be safe at home.
but at this point hes killed too many and hurt too many people to turn back so when dean pleads for him to back down hes hearing dean say "im fine with risking the apocalypse again, and i cant trust you to do a plan that you are certain will work" when dean is just worried about another eve slipping through
its just very delightfully complex (imho) i dont really have a conclusion
Cas definitely wanted Dean on his side. He didn't need to wake Dean up or have a conversation with him to get the journal. He chose to wake him up and have that conversation because he desperately wanted Dean not to think badly of him. It's just hilarious that at the same time, he was also like. There to steal shit. When he saw Dean sleeping on that couch, he just couldn't help himself. He wanted to talk to Dean.
Trying to get Dean on his side was important to Cas because he loves Dean and values their friendship, but it was also important to him because Cas had, to some extent, tied his self-image to everyone else's perception of him over the whole season. He lies to all of his friends—Sam, Dean, Bobby, Balthazar, Rachel. He lies to the Winchesters because he wants a place he can come to where someone still recognizes him as the person he used to be and not the person he is becoming. Crowley puts this best:
CROWLEY: The big lie -- the Winchesters still buy it. The good Cas, the righteous Cas. And long as they still believe it, you get to believe it. Well, I got news for you, kitten. A whore is a whore is a whore.
This is a period where Cas was doubting everything and wrestling with moral quandaries. He sees his own actions as monstrous, but also believes that monstrosity is necessary. He and Dean have a conversation about this very early on in 6.06, after their last interaction in 6.03 had Cas causing a child excruciating pain to gain information.
DEAN
What happened to you, Cas? You used to be human, or at least like one.
CASTIEL
I'm at war. Certain... regrettable things are now required of me.
I've talked about how the title of this episode, "You Can't Handle The Truth", shows Cas's hand in that he doesn't believe anybody else can handle the dirty work. He knows it makes him look bad and that's why he lies about it—to protect his image.
The whole of 6.20, he's struggling, but he's doing it alone. To his friends, he presents his actions with surety—telling Dean insistently that Cas knows what he's doing and that there's nothing broken about his plan, while he says privately praying to his father:
Am I doing the right thing? Am I on the right path? You have to tell me. You have to give me…A sign. Give me a sign. Because if you don’t…I’m gonna ju– I’m gonna do whatever I… Whatever I must.
And to himself about working with Crowley:
I asked myself, “what was I doing with this vermin?”
And while betraying Crowley briefly by killing demons Crowley sent after the Winchesters:
For a brief moment…I was me again.
Sam and Dean and Bobby's belief in Cas's goodness (that he was himself) was so important to Cas that he was spying on them all of 6.20 despite his alleged busy schedule just to check in and see what they were thinking about him. And when they did trust him again for that brief moment, he felt relief, but also knew it was all an illusion and felt shame and guilt about it:
Wonders never cease. They trusted me again. But it was just another lie.
The same discomfort and shame seeps off Cas in 5.17 when Sam and Dean thank him for saving them, while Cas knows Astropos was only after them because of him, and that if they understood the full picture, their feelings about what he'd actually done to "save" them would be very very different. He knows he's receiving praise he doesn't deserve, so the esteem they place on him is hollow.
On the other hand, I do think Cas grasps the emotional consequences of his actions for the most part. That's why he lied the whole season—because he was afraid of the fallout among every single person he knew and even more as the lies stacked and stacked. He knew none of them would agree with what he was doing. But the consequences with Sam and Dean also extend a little deeper than Cas thought they would, and that's what wounds him the absolute most, I think. I don't think Cas expected Sam to question whether Cas intentionally left his soul in The Cage, or for Dean to question whether or not Cas was involved in the plot to kidnap Lisa and Ben in 6.21. He is genuinely and deeply wounded when his care for them is essentially questioned at the very foundation and it leaves him feeling betrayed in his own way.
The thing is, Cas's privately held doubts still do not match the picture he presents to the Winchesters even after he is exposed. Privately, Cas is starting to see the pride and hubris underlying some of his choices:
I wish I could say I was clean of pride at that moment…
I see now that I was prideful. And in all likelihood, I was a fool.
I see now that was arrogance…Hubris
Privately, Cas reveals that his motives aren't as pure as he presents them to be:
I had no choice. I did it to protect the boys. Or to protect myself. I-I don’t know anymore.
Hiding…Lying…Sweeping away evidence. And my motives used to be so pure.
Crowley had a point, of course. My interest was conflicted. I still considered myself the Winchesters’ guardian.
But to the Winchesters? He says "I did it all for you" and "I did it to protect you. I did it to protect all of you" and "It's not broken". He doesn't let them see his doubts, because he might crumble under them—and because sunk cost fallacy and his own pride won't allow him to accept being questioned even by his closest friends. In other words, he continues to lie, and after the big reveal, Dean can see right through him.
CASTIEL: I'm doing this for you, Dean. I'm doing this because of you.
DEAN: Because of me. Yeah. You got to be kidding me.
Cas's pride also comes out in this conversation at night in Bobby's house.
DEAN: I'm not gonna logic you, okay? I'm saying don't...Just 'cause. I'm asking you not to. That's it. Look, next to Sam, you and Bobby are the closest things I have to family -- that you are like a brother to me. So, if I'm asking you not to do something...You got to trust me, man.
CASTIEL: Or what?
Dean says he isn't going to logic Cas. Bobby and Sam and Dean already tried that earlier that day, Balthazar will also try later, and it doesn't register. Dean puts all of the technical arguments aside and is trying to say (coupled with his earlier assertions) "I know you think you have to do this, but all of us can see you're going off the deep end and even you know that deep down. Please trust us on this." But Cas's response is "Or what?" He turns it into a battle of wills, then adds, "You can't stop me. You're just a man", which is also a dogwhistle for Dean when dealing with angels, who repeatedly over the course of the show, have called him a monkey, a dog, a pet, and other things to express the idea that he is beneath them as a justification for using and hurting him. It immediately turns them against each other because Cas feels like Dean is basically calling him crazy and is offended by the idea that he doesn’t know what he’s doing (even though he has his own private doubts, because at this point his self-image hinges on turning out to be right). Dean is seeing the angelic sense of superiority come out—something he’s far more familiar with than he’d like to be—something common to the angels who have used and manipulated and threatened him and acted entitled to him… and coupled with all the questions about exactly how involved Cas was in using Dean to get alphas over the course of the season and how he knows Cas used him in “The French Mistake”? It doesn’t paint a pretty picture for Dean.
In addition to their profound bond, I think Dean saying, "Cas, we can fix this!" and Dean being Cas's defender the entirety of 6.20 is also why Cas comes to him at the end of the episode. Dean is the weak link in the chain at the time (that completely changes in the next episode when Lisa and Ben are kidnapped). But Dean is also so devastated about all the faith he had in Cas's honesty being crushed, and he's reliving the demon blood arc in some sense, and he's probably reevaluating what he felt when Cas used him in "The French Mistake" and what exactly was going on in "My Heart Will Go On" and how—when Crowley forced him and Sam into doing his bidding, Cas knew it and he let it happen—he let it happen because he wanted the alphas. Not only did Cas know Crowley was using them—he went to great lengths to cover up his involvement and keep them off Crowley's tail. Cas's speech in the following episode demanding Dean's trust again is not only ill-timed while Dean is worried sick about Lisa and Ben—it's full of lies and half truths and even a little shit slinging that Dean knows isn't fair and that is deeply reminiscent of Sam's speech full of falehoods about trust in 4.21.
On Cas's side, I think you're spot on about his lack of cognizance on how he comes across when he says:
CASTIEL: I came to tell you that I will find Lisa and Ben, and I will bring them back. Stand behind me, the one time I ask.
I don't think Cas meant to suggest that the first statement depends on the second one (we can judge as much when he heals Lisa at the end of the episode) but that's absolutely how it comes across.
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NO THOUGHTS JUST SNOW!!!
What was your favorite hair look? (personally I can’t pick because I love the curls but the buzz cut was sexy and his hair at the very end was also hot like why can he pull all of them off so well)
bold of you to assume i have the ability to choose! i am a slut for them all <3 however the curls and the ending hair are tied for first
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My first ever comic con! And first cosplay too. Of course it's gonna be my boy :] Ramblings about the process are under the cut(Let me know if?? You would want me to elaborate with process images for any of the steps?)
The costume took me forever to make, as I've never done any machine sewing, sculpting, fabric dying or spray painting before but learning all of these was so fucking fun!! I never realised just how many different skills go into making a cosplay but it was so worth it!!!
Almost all of the clothes(except the hat) were purchased first as bases, but all of the detailing was added by me. All of the fabric used was originally just scraps that I was given for free so I needed to learn how to dye and dye all of the stars, they were originally white.
The sewing machine was its own beast that brought me tons of frustration from the lack of skill and knowledge (it was devastating to find out that 95% of fuck ups were my fault and not the machine's lmao). But as a result, a hat sewn from scratch, all of the fur trims, embroidery on the corset, stars and the collar(which is very hard to see on the pictures unfortunately) was all added manually. The stars and the stripes(on the back of the cape) were attached using heat-and-bond adhesive (I WISH I knew about such thing just when I started working on this. It would save me so much time and nerves.)
Then I found out about polymorph(mouldable plastic) and it has become the next thing I wanted to learn, to sculpt the claws and the fangs(yes, they're handmade jfksjs). The claws I then primed and painted in trillion coats because I wasn't satisfied with the colour of the spray paint. The fangs I moulded to my own teeth and then stained with tea to match the colour of my teeth :)c
As for makeup, I used Mehron Paradise water activated paints. At first I wanted to try to save money and bought myself Snazaroo instead, which unfortunately turned out to be a waste. Snazaroo didn't hold on my face for longer than 2 hours, cracking and peeling awfully. Mehron on the other hand survived 11 hours of me smiling, talking, emoting and such and didn't even crease at the smile lines(I'm actually shocked about that). It obviously works like any other makeup which means your skin texture and wrinkles won't go anywhere but Mehron's elasticity pleasantly surprised me. It did obviously smear from sweat and saliva(if you're eating and licking your lips) but if you don't touch the skin it just dries again, self setting. But if it's dry it's fully smear-proof. Highly recommend!
And last but not least, I've decided against painting my hands as it was very risky that I will stain everything I touch at the smallest hint of sweat. So instead I got myself gloves-tights(? Not sure how they're called but it's made from the same fabric as tights) and painted them with normal acrylic paint(did you know you could dye fabric with acrylic paint? I personally didn't), then heat set with an iron and voilà, they're reusable, my hands are not stained after an exhausting day and I don't stain everything I touch. It worked wonderfully which honestly was a surprise as I was really sceptical that acrylic paint will somehow stay in place.
I think this whole thing took me minimum of 6 months with big-big breaks for my school and life in general. But I'm really proud! This project taught me so many new skills and I couldn't have been happier about learning new knowledge, even if it sucked to fail in the meantime.
Everyone at the con was really nice and gave me a large confidence boost even tho it was my first time and I had no idea what I was doing. Taking photos with other people was really awkward/new for me as I hate cameras so I really had no idea how to pose/behave in front of one. But that's okay I think. This whole experience definitely made me want to do this again, so I think that will come with experience. Thank you for reading this far, hope you enjoyed this little summary :)
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Alfred comes home and there's a whole noise from the kitchen.
Alfred: Is everything okay?
Damian: Dumbass is coming out.
Alfred: Oh.
Alfred (to Dick): ...I figured this day would come sooner or later...
Dick:
Alfred: Don't think I didn't saw it my boy, and pardon me if I should said something before...
Dick: No, no, no it's not
Alfred:... I mean It was obvious from the start but I figured I shouldn't press-
Dick: Alfie It's not
Jason: No, no let him finish.
----
Batman: Yes, my kid also came out to me recently.
Superman (to Dick): Oh wow, that's great! I'm proud of you buddy.
Dick:
Dick: What
Tim: It's me.
Superman: Oh
Superman: Oh wow, thats great! I'm proud of you buddy.
Dick: No, wait you can't just-
----
Jon: I'm just glad in not being alone in this, you know.
Titans:
Dick: It's not me.
Titans: "Oh, right. Sure." " Yeah we knew it" "Totally"
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tagged by the gorgeous and fabulous @cordiallyfuturedwight and @aprylynn for february's roundup:
tagging the usual music favs: @jiminsproof @thvinyl @jimin-gaon @visionsofgideontheninth @spicyclematis @kimchokejin @jihopesjoint @monismochi plus @kimtaegis for the amy macdonald of it all 💜 and also you, dear reader. MWAH
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not to start shit but. tell me you didn't understand princess jellyfish without telling me you didn't understand princess jellyfish
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OK SPOILERS I GUESS FOR BLACK OPS COLD WAR UNDER THE CUT BECAUSE I JUST DID THE HAVANA MISSION AND "BREAK ON THROUGH" AND I'M LITERALLY SO PRESSED RN??
I AM SO UPSET THEY MADE ME CHOOSE BETWEEN HELEN AND LAZAR WHAT EVEN WAS THAT WHY'D IT HAVE TO BE THOSE TWO THEY'RE LITERALLY MY FAVORITES OF THE NEWER CHARACTERS WHY
TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE THEY HAD CRAZY GOOD CHEMISTRY AND I WAS LITERALLY SITTING THERE THE WHOLE TIME DURING THAT MISSION THINKING "Dang y'all make a good couple y'all got it goin' on" BUT NO OF COURSE NOT THIS IS CALL OF DUTY WHERE NO ONE IS HAPPY AND GOOD ENDINGS DON'T EXIST AND LOVE IS A LIE
I struggled for like fifteen minutes just sitting there on the pause menu trying to pick UGHHH but I ended up going with Helen in the end simply because I think she can bring slightly more value to the team (NOT TO SAY LAZAR IS USELESS HE'S EXTREMELY HANDY AND VERY COOL AND I LOVE HIM) just because of her connection with MI6 and her ability to gather intel and all that good stuff and I'm just ever so slightly more attached to her as a character and I also got the impression Lazar really liked her a lot so I would've felt worse saving him and knowing he missed her like a crap ton so in the end I think I made the better decision
HOWEVER COMMA THEN WE HAVE "BREAK ON THROUGH" AND I'M LITERALLY SO MAD BC WDYM ADLER WAS LYING AND I LITERALLY DON'T EVEN KNOW THE GUY AND I HAD A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT LIFE AND I WAS THE GUY ARASH KADIVAR SHOT IN THE BEGINNING IN THE MISSION WITH WOODS AND MASON AND ADLER LIKE WHAT?? WDYM THOSE MEMORIES IN VIETNAM WEREN'T REAL?? WDYM I'VE ACTUALLY KNOWN ADLER FOR LIKE TWO DAYS AND NOT TWENTY YEARS?? Wdym HUDSON was actually RIGHT to be worried about me going into the Lubyanka building?????? HUDSON?? RIGHT ABOUT SOMETHING?? NUH-UH
And wdym PARK KNEW THE WHOLE TIME LIKE GIRL I THOUGHT WE WERE BESTIES WHAT IS THIS!! YOU HAD ME RISK MY NECK FOR YOU INSTEAD OF MR. LOVER BOY AND NOW I FIND OUT YOU WERE FRICKIN LYING TO ME THE WHOLE TIME TOO LIKE?? I'm aware it was for the greater good and that technically it was good for Bell too bc now she's a good guy and isn't a bad guy (I play with female Bell to be clear because that's awesome and I love that that's an option) BUT Y'ALL STILL LIED TO ME?? I'm gonna keep an eye on those two for REAL now like watch as Adler frickin tries to offer me up as some sacrificial lamb at some point I just KNOW he will UGH
Idk I'm still holding out hope Lazar is alive somehow because technically I didn't actually see him die he was just lying there and I felt so AWFUL UGHHH
Anyway I'm going to carry on pretending he's fine and he got out and everything is hunky dory and great and he and Helen went on that date and they're together and everything is fine and wonderful
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I was on the phone with Tobin, talkin' bout how my great uncle died and how at his (Tobin’s) funeral, BEFORE, he's goin to tell EVERYBODY that I'm GOIN to say “Well, there goes a real sack of crap!” AT the funeral and to NOT get mad when I do say that
His words, “Mel’s threatened to say ‘there goes a real sack of crap!’ at the funeral, so DON'T get mad when they do!”
Followed by, “Can you IMAGINE how mad everybody would get after you said that?”
He's 53 and STILL ‘members the time I told him when he was in his 30s that I WAS GOIN TO SAY THAT WHEN HE DIES AT HIS FUNERAL
Like holy shit, this is one of the moments you KNOW that we're related
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on another irony i went back to look for Road’s song out of nostalgia while at it and the only thing youtube knew to do was shove STEP from a3 in my way, for NO reason, but only to have me stare, confused, almost yelling, about why out of all the a3 songs to shove my way it had to be the one with Kanda’s second seiyuu while i was specifically talking about the dgm seiyuu coincidences that had been following me.
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Well, he was talking to me again. Now he's gone. Approaching three days now with no word. Legitimately don't understand. How can you be telling someone how much you want them and then not say shit for several days? This is what happened last time he stopped talking to me, too. It's as if he has to go do a hard reset for a week any time he shows vulnerability. I get that so many men are taught that emotions = weakness, but this is wack. Pack that toxic masculinity bullshit up and fucking kiss me already I swear to god.
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6, 8, 22, for bestie diana ;)
vanilla sunday meme ♡
6. does your muse steal clothing from their partner?
YES. she's always had a bit of a thing for stealing her partner's shirts, but she doesn't typically do it unless she's close with the person. so, typically only with a couple of "friends" she's been with casually, or her first boyfriend and albert. lmao rip ex-husband, you didn't get the honour of seeing tiny lil diana in your massive shirts
with albert, she loves to take his shirts without his permission after they get together because she thinks it irritates him, not knowing that he finds it cute (which took him by surprise at first, because he thought for sure he'd be angry that she hadn't asked before touching his things) and, of course, there is that level of possessiveness and her being covered in his scent... which she loves, by the way. that's one of the reasons she likes wearing them in the first place, but also because she finds a lot of comfort in wearing his shirts or his dressing gowns, even before they were together (clown)
8. is your muse comfortable with, or proud of their body? are they insecure?
diana has a really complicated relationship with her body, honestly. she grew up doing ballet, so i think that kind of tells you a lot already. she's always been naturally thin, but that was too much, and she would obsess over any small change she saw. she developed a healthier relationship with her body during her 20s – which, i mentioned in those other asks that sex and bdsm became a form of self-expression for her, it also helped her build a lot of confidence in her body – but there are still aspects she's not the best with. her hirsutism is one she's always struggled with, so she is quite obsessive with removing body hair and shaving her face
albert is like... body worshipper 1000. he spends so much time just kissing her all over and telling her how beautiful she is, and she wasn't used to that early in their relationship, so when she wasn't getting either a big head or being a bit flustered (depends on the day), she would sometimes tense up a little, expecting other comments or thinking he was lying :(
also alluded to this a little bit in that fight fic, but the changes to her body with uroboros were not ones she was that fond of. having a bit more toning and muscularity reminded her of when she did ballet, so that wasn't fun, even though she loved her eyes. but overall, she does like her body. it took a while to get there from when she was younger, but she does
22. does your muse read smut, own magazines, or watch p×rn?
not really, no. magazines don't really do much for her, and she's always been very uncomfortable with watching tapes and such. just a small reminder of when she was born and all of that; it was very tailored to the male gaze, dehumanising women and reducing them to objects, so... gestures vaguely. she's tried to read erotic novels before as well, but honestly, she just found them boring lmao she's very nitpicky. everything she's learned has been from experience or sex manuals (she's cute. i love her), and she doesn't need supplemental material when she's having her "me time"
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Imagine Nanami Kento waking up from anesthesia after surgery, his bleary and unfocused gaze landing on you (his wife) standing beside him and holding his hand in yours. You smile at him warmly, softly reassuring him that he's okay and that you're right here beside him as he stares at you silently.
Nanami looks down at your joined hands, his gaze seems to focus on the wedding band adorning his ring finger. He stares at it for a moment before looking back up at you.
"Who are you?" He slurs, his words sloshy and imprecise. So unlike him, and so very adorable. "Are you a nurse?"
You giggle at Nanami's question.
"No, I'm not a nurse."
Nanami seems puzzled at your response. His brows furrow as his fingers move against yours, thumb stroking across your knuckles in that gentle motion he always does to soothe you. Your smile widens. Looks like there are some things that even ketamine can't erase.
"Wow. You got the most gorgeous smile. Are you a model? You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my whole life. You got really pretty teeth too..."
Kento's fingers tighten around yours, his voice falling into a groggy whisper.
"But...I think I'm married. We shouldn't be holding hands like this."
You bite your lip, fighting against the bubbling laughter in your throat and failing.
"O-Oh?"
Nanami nods, his expression shifting from one of appreciative awe to adorable seriousness.
"I want to be a good husband."
Well that just about melted your whole damn heart. Even the hospital staff in the background can't repress their "awww"s and "that's a keeper"s.
"Don't worry, you are a wonderful husband, Kento. I know that for sure."
He's confused again, those unfocused honey brown's searching yours, trying to figure out the situation as best as he can given the circumstances.
"How do you know?"
You raise your left hand, bringing it into his line of sight and wiggle your ring finger, the golden band surrounding it captures Nanami's attention in an instant.
"Because I'm your wife."
Nanami's eyes instantly grow wide, his expression morphing into one of childlike wonder.
"You're my wife?"
You laugh.
"Yes."
He squeezes your hand with a surprising amount of strength given that he was knocked out cold not that long ago.
"We're really married?"
"Yes."
"Wow..." Kento breathes, drifting off for a moment before asking you another question. "Have we kissed yet?"
His innocent yet hilarious question sends you into another fit of laugher.
"Y-yes! Many times."
Nanami rewards you with a dopey smile, his gaze so utterly loving, enchanted by your unrestrained joy.
"My wife." He murmurs adoringly, his fingers reaching up to caress your cheek.
"I love hearing you laugh." His palm cups your face. "You really are so beautiful. I hit the jackpot, didn't I?"
Grinning from ear to ear, you press a tender kiss to Kento's fingertips before guiding his hand back down to the bed.
"Alright sweetest man alive, you need to stop talking before you make every person in this room fall in love with you. I'm going to grab a snack for us for later. I'll be right back, okay?"
Kento nods.
"Okay. Can I get another kiss when you come back?"
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