#<- guy who only thinks about homestuck Getting a lot of homestuck vibes from this…..

[arieava]

im not the only one getting homestuck vibes from this. right. right.

[superspecial-awesome]

s0 queerosexual hcs. for pride month

basically my interpretation of the cast in this regard is that theyre a bunch of annoying queer teenagers who will never discover this about themselves because they live in 1990s japan and all think there's only gay and straight and that being the former is grounds to be beaten in the streets

Yugi: the only one who has his shit figured out. transmasc and bi and he plans on taking that to his grave. he has a strong preference for women though so that part never really comes up. "attracted to every woman ever and one guy i met at a gas station six years ago" disease. also bonus points anzu knows he's transmasc and helped him figure out binding and shit

Miho: huge lesbian but "oh no it's just that girls are objectively more attractive than guys everyone knows that, i just haven't met the right man yet, besides every girl wishes they could date women instead that's why bakura is so popular it's because he looks like a woman." I also like to imagine that in an ideal world, she'd fuck with genderfluidity

Bakura: aroace and agender transfem. he gives me he/it/any vibes. I think partly due to The Mega Autism he never really understood the deal with traditional masculinity so he feels disconnected from manhood as a whole and would be a lot more comfortable being able to exist as something entirely detached from gender. I also think the swarms of girls at all times made him view women as some sort of other species entirely and he's got a lot of deep-rooted misogyny going on about it, but tbh anzu and miho could fix him. and make him into the vague girlthing he always was

Anzu: Idk what label to slap onto her but I don't think physical appearance or gender plays any role in her being attracted to people at all. maybe like demiromantic asexual. but i dont think demi is the term im looking for. definitely ace though.

Honda: "WOW I LOVE BEING A MAN I LOVE WOMEN AND RULES AND ORDER I DON'T AT ALL FEEL LIKE I'M CURSED TO FIT MYSELF INTO A BOX THAT'S TOO SMALL FOR ME" and he believes that wholeheartedly and then wonders why he needs to constantly prove himself over things that don't matter to avoid his mental health crumbling to dust. I don't think he's trans though I just think he needs to chill out. also he's bi and poly and the single most useless hopeless romantic ever.

Jonouchi: bi but i think his refusal to accept that as a possibility has made him very aware of a lot of other things he has going on psychologically. like his homophobia has somehow made him a more self-aware and chill person. "honda put his hand on my shoulder for more than 0.5 seconds and my entire nervous system took a screenshot does this mean im g--wait no im just touched starved huh i wonder if that has ever impacted my poor decision making in the past." also him being used for the cartoon standard "guy wears girl clothes and likes it" joke is grounds for me to hc him as genderqueer. I could absolutely see him getting really into fem presentation.

Yami Yugi: gay gay homosexual gay

Kaiba: transfem in the super dysphoric way but will absolutely never find this out because any time she becomes remotely aware of something bothering her about herself she just looks in the mirror and says "no." i also wanna say arospec and aspec but idk she's fully either. i think if i wanted to give you an accurate idea of how attraction works for her i'd have to pull up the homestuck quadrants and i'm not joking.

Yami Bakura: agender is a way that's like "dude I'm a ghost in a ring who cares." If you called him a she he'd be like "what" and then after you got two words into explaining he'd go "nvm I underestimated the amount of shit I don't give about this." His sexuality is no time for dat goku

[play-rough]

8, 21, 22, & 25 for Dazai and Chuuya 🥹💕

🩵❤️‍🔥

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

Dazai- god i feel like I’m so picky about Dazai characterizations and it’s so hard to describe sometimes I’ll just be like NO THATS WRONG‼️ but I guess one thing is when Dazai mentoring ryunosuke is just boiled down to a black and white situation where Dazai was soooo abusive to poor ryu (and i feel like this is a disservice to akutagawas character too), but Iike you have a child raised in a strict mafia environment and then you give that unstable child control over *another child* it’s not gonna go well, and i don’t personally blame either of the children in that scenario 🙄 idk BSD just has a lot of complex situations and I feel like they’re not always handled as such 😌🩵 Wtf this morally grey character is making problematic choices??? Cancel him🚫

Chuuya- when he’s just angry shouty guy who yells and shouts, sometimes I feel like I’m looking at a bad bakugo parody 😭

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

Ummm for Dazai i like making him break down and cry and forcing him to admit he needs help or attention 🥺👉👈 or sick or just any kind of general vulnerability, and flip side for Chuuya, I love forcing him to admit he’s worried about Dazai or cares about him. My favorite part of Chuuya’s character is that he’s a genuinely nice person, Dazai is just so annoying and pushes his buttons, so I love showing off Chuuya’s softer side and highlighting his protective and caring nature. That scene where chuuya watches Dazai get slammed into a tree by lovecraft x1000000❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to ths character? Something you don't like?

For both of them like I said above im so picky and if you make them one dimensional or even if the vibes are bad I’ll just be like NO THATS WRONG‼️ and close the fic

Something i *like* is pretty much my same answer for 21 ajdhhfhdjs I really only write about what I like reading about so I’m a sucker for vulnerable Dazai and sappy Chuuya BUT for a more specific, ridiculous, self indulgent answer i like when Dazai is written regressed 🥹🩵 or even if he’s baby, just in energy 🥺🩵 Dazai is baby and should be written as such

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

First impressions of Dazai was i don’t even remember him, I read the first bsd book at the library when I was in middle/high school (don’t remember exactly when) and was like eh. Boring. I think it didn’t help that they didn’t have all the books so it was like volume one, three, five, prime numbers only. I think I read soul eater instead lmao. Flash forward to college I had seen bsd characters and i liked the designs, and i had figured chuuya would be my favorite bc he kinda reminded me a bit of Karkat from homestuck (a dear fave of mine at one point) in that angry but actually sweet and kindhearted kinda way.

I was still eh whatever about Dazai, which is crazy because I’ve seen him compared to both Gojo and Reigen in the silly mentor who lost the kids he’s custody of kinda way, and those two are some more faves of mine. Tbh i didn’t solidify him as my fave until we learned of his tragic past because my OTHER favorite kind of character is a rude little bastard, and i was shown the light. Dazai Osamu has the range. He’s like a two for one, which I’m pretty sure he’s a Gemini??? I’m not gonna google and confirm just trust me i think he’s a Gemini ♊️

Impressions now obviously Dazai is my babygirl, my soaking wet cat, my poor pathetic meow meow who has both never done anything wrong and also committed so many war crimes. Chuuya I knew i would like him and I do lmao, close second from Dazai. I think Dazai is pretty much my ultimate fave character of all time…

[bootycallofcthulhu]

I haven't really engaged with a whole lot of fandom stuff aside from just liking fan art/memes on here and twitter. Anything beyond that is usually just not within my boundaries because this old man still has war flashbacks from superwholock and homestuck (and also danganronpa but thats a whole other can of worms).

But I especially don't really talk comics with people because they're usually just the most gatekeepy motherfuckers and I can't vibe with that. All I can ever think of is the guy in college at best buy, looking for a mythical 3ds port of Undertale that was never announced who immediately ended a conversation and walked away because I thought the GotG movie was mid. I didn't even say I disliked it. I just said it was fine.

For the most part, that hasn't really changed and the introduction of Miles Morales kind of just made it worse (read: racist). Back at A&M, there was a hispanic heritige group in the student union that were having a study session around the time Miles started getting better story arcs (a few years before secret wars for those of you familiar with his comics). I as a mixed hispanic guy was pretty into it, despite Bendis not really having an identity for Miles just yet. This group of dudes called it pandering (which like, yeah could be valid who am i to tell the otherwise but they were also asked by someone if they even read it and they just said nah Mexican spider-man is dumb theres only one) which was about the tamest I ever heard it get because man if you ever go on twitter and say Miles Morales is Spider-Man, you run into some people really desperate to prove theyre not racist by getting really racist.

And to be completely honest, I have never seen that community agree on a damn thing until the current run of Spider-Man when MJ got married to some dude named Paul and stayed with him after their lives turned out to be fake or something idk I'm still catching up, but its one of the funniest things to see from the outside.

But then the previews for Ultimate Spider-Man #1 dropped a few months ago. Great art, an adult, married Peter Parker with a whole new dynamic. I preordered this issue 2 months ago, everyone, reviewer and reader alike loved this take. It was the second time I've ever seen anyone in this space agree on something.

But my local shop forgot to include mine. I was pretty bummed, because I ordered it months ago, didnt show up day 1 and my issue was gone due to a database error. Then the cashier looked at me, said hold on, went back and grabbed one of his own personal issues, readded it to the inventory and sold it to me.

Now, its not uncommon for people to buy one issue to read, one to preserve. He will probably get reimbursed. But he didn't have to. He acfually could have sold it for a tidy profit since its around $60 USD on ebay right now. His only reason was I looked like a fan. And honestly this stupid community needs more people like him.

[thescrapbookingscientist]

Bimonthly Media Roundup

- Hellsing Abridged (Webseries) - A rather old one but I do really like the aesthetic of this series - The kind of rough gothic look that was popular in the early 2000s. I appreciate that the author took the Dracula lore and just decided to go really weird with it with the multiple monster designs for Alucard himself, then applying that same "Rule of Cool looks over logic" monster lore for every other character in the series.

- Army of Darkness (Movie) - VHS night at my friends place, While I was familiar with Ash Vs the Evil dead I'd never actually seen this film and uh. Well I don't know what I was expecting but boy this sure wasn't that. I would not exactly call this a 'good' movie but it certainly was a fun one, and an incredible watching experience in a group setting. It reminded me a lot of Big Trouble in Little China with it's campy low budget energy where weird shit is constantly happening that the movie will never explain and the characters react very nonchalantly to the batshit things they are experiencing, Plot wise the movie could be described as Bruce Campbells No-Good Very Bad Day but the things that make it bad are honestly very funny and creative so good for it. I wish they made more movies like this nowadays honestly, just dumb little fun passion projects with obviously fake but still cool practical effects and an unnecessary skeleton army.

- Star Trek Strange New Worlds (TV) - Not too far in yet so not much to say, I like court themed episodes so I'm having fun with season 2 so far. Pike and Uhura are my faves as they are just very likable and silly guys who still know when to take their jobs seriously. Also this is a cool poster.

- Star Trek Lower Decks (TV) - Also only 2 episodes in so far but Season 4 is starting strong, I loved The Moopsy and everything about it and the menagerie in general, the vulcan girl getting a larger role with Tendi in particular seems like it will be a fun dynamic, and the humor and overall hyped vibes of the characters is still as strong as ever. Hmm I wonder if it would be worth it to paint myself green to do a Tendi cosplay or if Homestuck made that illegal for everyone forever.

- Dr Stone (Anime) - Yup.

- The S Classes That I Raised (Webnovel) - While I was never not invested in the story I've glad we've moved on to a new arc. Han Yoojin using his abilities to find people with unique non-fighting skills to take business away from what would be an evil mega corporation is a nice use of time-travel based knowledge, so I hope we get a bit more of that. I also would like some more downtime as I like all the characters and wish they got to hang out in low stakes situations more often. I suppose I'm also just a bit worn out of scrolling through action scenes, as while I quite like the art (and especially the coloring) style, the big effect explosions just don't translate super well to the scrolling style still-art pages of K-webcomics. That being said it could be a lot worse as Yoojin's relative powerlessness does make every fight at least interesting in how it needs to be thought through rather than just punched a lot - I just enjoy the fun character banter and political drama more.

- Ace Attorney Vs Professor Layton (Video Game) - Well that ending. happened. In truth I don't hate the twist necessarily on it's own, so much that it's the kind of twist that if you think about it too long it retroactively makes the rest of the story nonsensical. I also find the storyteller and Darklaw's motives to be very dumb which brings it down, not to mention they just axed Barnum from the last part of the game entirely despite him being arguably the best character in the game. Overall I didn't hate the game though, as I found a lot of the little character dialogue, puzzles, and Layton interactions cute - It makes me want to play a Layton game again that's for sure. I'm not sure it's a good Ace Attorney game as it feels very tonally different from the rest of the series, but hey with this I've experienced every Ace Attorney game in the franchise so that's nice, I'll have to do some character and case rankings at some point.

- One Piece (Anime) - Just finished Skypia and thinking about doing a liveblog from this point out. This was a pretty good arc honestly, I loved the villains design aesthetic and powers, lots of good crew bonding moments (Especially for Sanji + Usopp and Luffy + Nami), I liked the setting, the flashback episodes with Mont Blanc had uh questionable politics but the "we both have wives offscreen but are always shown together, think about each other constantly, and die thinking only of the other" gayness of it all made me laugh, and I think it did a good job giving everyone something interesting to do. Other notes would be how funny it is that Robin for the first half was having an entirely different, lovely experience wandering through the woods while everyone fights for their lives, that she nonchalantly snapped a guys neck when he told her to leave, and that poor Chopper had to fight 3/4 of the big bad guys all by himself that poor little deer.

- Genshin Impact (Video Game) - Still here, doing more co-op with my friend now, exploring the bonkers long Chasm quests in Liyue, hoping Kokomi comes back because I want her on my team so bad. Anyway Inazuma has been cool so far, I like the different environments on the islands (other than the lightning island which can sink into the ocean frankly) and there are lots of good character designs. Also I've been listening to the music more and its good!

Listening To: Bones by MSMR, In My Head by Mike Shinoda, Ivy by Taylor Swift, Dancin by Aaron Smith, Make Up Your Mind by Florence + The Machine, Ordinaryish People and World's Smallest Violin by AJR, Ghost by Justin Beiber, IDOL by YOASOBI, Atlantis by Seafret, Doin’ Time by Lana Del Rey, All the Boys by Panic! At The Disco.

[vilevileposting]

I'm really enjoying my first reading of Homestuck

I forgor to post this after Homestuck Book Club!

In my notes for Week 3 I talk a little about not really knowing how this blew up and how niche it feels, but I think the picture is forming. WV: Ascend demonstrated that even without really knowing what's going on, Homestuck definitely has the narrative pull to bring me along for the ride. Compared to that, a 13 year old trying to read the thing her friends like probably won't care that she's not picking up on all the references and programmer humor.

My discord status has been RANCOROUS for several weeks. I think the time may be nigh to make a second homestuck reference.

Week 3:

539: Not convinced that John’s dad’s room will be much of anything. Maybe that’ll be the point where John learns his dad doesn’t give a shit about harlequins and the harlequin thing was all a misguided attempt to connect with his son! But if that’s what that is then what John walks in and sees is probably a normal room as opposed to like some FMA shit.

543: The combination of a book whose girth is known to be lethal with a system whose velocity is known to be lethal is interesting.

544:

As a metaphor for the disconnect between you and also you’re the guy who knocked over your grandmother’s ashes and cleaned them up like shit. Where are those ashes now, John, were you careful with them?

554: Lethal momentum through a wall, baby!!! I still get credit for seeing the future even when it’s heavily foreshadowed.

556: Southern colonel? ☹

592: Does this guy have Kamina glases…

614: Based on how I’ve heard Dave’s name more than John’s as a fandom outsider, John really kinda is the other guy.

629: Blood Loss in the Big Easy sounds like a made up nonsense phrase that somehow captures the intended vintage vibe but it turns out New Orleans is actually called the Big Easy.

636: I bet I can annoy Char by incorporating the phrase “that’s really all there is to say on the matter” into my vocabulary.

644: TOBY FOX ARRIVAL

645: I’m constantly struck by how niche this all feels. I haven’t gotten any answers to why homestuck blew up like it did, and I think I won’t until I get to the trolls.

651: I bet that mystery silhuette is GG

672: Damning hole in my “this guy is a shadow demon” theory – no sharp teef

687: Lot of king hatred for a guy who isn’t a shadow demon in a cosmology that literally or metaphorically uses chess pieces…

691: Bro eats green… Me too man.

696: CAR DEPENDENCY!!!

699: Chess board…………………

704: Raising my eyebrow at the ominous planet

708: Me reaching this page marks the first time anyone has thought about Tab since the Tab mine collapse in 2013

713: Hidden message vibes from this page.

714: How could I forget sburb is green. Sburb is green, this guy eats green, think about it!

716: I think Cal sacrificed himself to save Dave, hence the face turn to thinking puppets are awesome and being rancorous. Also – kernelsprite prototyped with dead bird!

756: I don’t even know what a cliffhanger is, Andrew Hussie. I am reading this webcomic five thousand years in the future, cliffhangers are nothing to me. Your world is laid bare for me at my leisure.

757: Coolest shit ever. Whole lot going on. Just want to flex that I noticed the sburb rocket is in the crater of Rose’s house, complete with wizard hand. The next crater we see is John’s house, which bizarrely grows a tree, then a sburb fruit, then we see that sburb fruit is also a weird pod that the (other) other guy seems to be living inside, or emering from. After that we see a crater next to a volcano, and we see the meteor actually hit somewhere that’s clearly uninhabited and explicitly an ocean over. Also with a MASSIVE hole where the volcano used to be. There’s a chance GG is a mountain hermit but no matter how you dice it, with only three meteors they were never all going to be accounted for. John’s dad is a sleeper hit, what a badass. Those fools put him in the trick cuffs and now he’s going to tear through hell doomslayer style. Rose’s mom also seems to have a secret tunnel to the lab, which has a spirograph on it! Dave’s brother in the relative present seems like he might actually be the coolest guy ever between the hat and confirmed kamina glasses, so he might actually be 100% the kind of guy Dave thinks he is. Final note: the symbols for latitude and longitude look like the wandering vagrant’s tattoo.

[violetvenom]

He totally nailed it. And I love how Duck-Silvani disses Duck-Sparrows writing skills. These two panels seem for me like a classical freudian slip.🧐

You are definitely closer to being a furry than me. (I chuckled at Rae-chu.) XD The only sona I've had made for fun is my Trollsona from Homestuck. (The grey thing which sits left on my blog design.) But when I was still cosplaying a furry friend called me something which in German terminology basically is close to being a furry adjacent. But more like in an ally way.

And like I said, rule 34 exists for a reason. I've sadly seen things I wish I could forget. But I still can see why furries got a bad reputation tho. The so called murrsuits and stories revolving around them is..something else. 👀 Ofc not every furry is like that and I'm sure it's just a bad minority which gets the attention. I for my part can tell stories how a few bad apples ruined a lot of stuff for other cosplayers here in my country. Being in the Homestuck fandom was also wild because of a few idiots who coulnd't behave.

Oh, and don't get me wrong. I don't think Silvani is a bad artist. But the thing is he is far from perfect (which is totally okay because he is only human) but Sparrow praises his art like it's the best ever. Sparrow totally worships his friends art without a second thought, which is also not a bad thing per se, but using it to diss other artists will create backlash. And so he unwillingly drags Silvani in the shit show. I overall don't like how Silvani draws the F4. But Quackerjack is definitely the worst. The bulkiness is just too much. I also have the feeling this is just a bad doppleganger who hid the real QJ somewhere. The fact that Silvani even gave his version gloves, while QJ canonically doesn't wear some makes that feeling worse. Like...has the doppleganger to hide his fingerprints so his bluff won't get blown up?

And to Sparrow it apparently matters that people like to ship Quackervolt in any way possible. XD Which is sad and funny. Like, why do you care so much about if some people want them smooching like an old married couple? They already act like an old married couple ffs.

And I understand that you try to keep your acc clean, which is great and not easy tho. That's why I self-flagged mine as mature acc. There isn't really much spicy things you'll find on here and kids can google worse stuff, but I know not everyone wants to see or read sexual innuendos. There is only one fanart page (which is clearly for adults) where you can find the unfinished and uncensored version.

Sparrow also seems to forget that not everyone draws and look at spicy things to jerk off. (That's probably more a male thing, I dunno.) He gives me vibes that he projects from himself on others a bit too much.

In my case I just wanted to see if I can draw an intimate situation which is cozy, full of trust and love, and in my opinion I succeeded. I always had trouble drawing two figures interacting with each other so this definitely was a challenge.

Also Sparrow writing about how he wants to buy some of the 2011 comics just to gift it away..well..it actually seems weird to me.

I can't imagine he makes enough money to actually be able to buy a bulk of those expensive comics which are considered a collectible nowadays. And why gift them kids in a hospital? I don't think the majority of kids nowaydays would appreciate or handle them well. He would make the comics even more rare and expensive as they already are and thus hurting the fandom more than doing good.

The idea overall is honorable, but why not getting the kids other comics..like the ones who get published right now and are not as valuable? Oh wait..he didn't write them and can flaunt his "writing skills" then. 🙃 For me it just seems like empty words he won't follow through. A way to signal he isn't such a bad guy after all if he wants to gift sick kids expensive comics.

If he actually does it, and can prove it (because you can literally write everything on the internet) I can respect that and kudos to him, but this won't cancel all the awful stuff he said.

The funniest thing, really, is that I technically could just appeal to Twitter to get me unbanned from Sparrow's page, because I haven't even done anything to warrant the ban other than the screens I showed y'all, and that's not even that bad. I haven't harassed him, I haven't threatened him, all I said was essentially "I wasn't a fan of how QuackerJack was written here."

I could bring that debate to Twitter and probably get unbanned if I actually cared to, lol.

He really didn't win anything. That's the same as yanking the cord out of the game console because someone was doing better than you at Mario Party.

That's honestly kinda sad, ngl.

Anyway, guys, don't bother him, he's not worth the time

[autisticaradiamegido]

do you have any fan trolls? trollsonas? do show

day 66

sssorta? i have a sburb au for my d&d characters, and i decided to make half of them trolls. i didnt bother changing their names to fit the typical homestuck naming conventions, but their backstories in this are necessarily pretty different than their og ones.

but that means yall dont need to have played d&d with me to understand what im talking about so! infodump under the cut

The main conceit of their adventure is that Victavyre and Davril (who originally were both played as eldritch knights for lost mines of phandilver/princes of the apocalypse at 2 separate tables) are the first two to enter the game, and their entries are Circumstantially Simultaneous. They both think they're playing a four-player session with their friends, but they end up on opposite sides of the same medium in the same way the hivebent trolls had a bifurcated session.

When Davril wakes up on Prospit, he encounters not only a sleeping Elis, but also Szelseis and Arastina. He thinks they are just weird reoccurring dream demons until he encounters Victavyre in the medium. They get their teams in touch with each other and gradually arrange to daisy-chain the two sessions together. Adventures ensue and all that.

Victavyre and Arastina (originally tieflings) are sisters in their og backstories, so in this au they are simply two grubs who were adopted by the same lusus (who i think is going to be some sort of two-headed creature, each head instinctively adopting a grub of its own).

Szelseis (originally a yuan-ti pureblood) has a giant snake lusus, and he HATES her. He keeps her around because he likes to start shit and it is useful to have a big snake around to eat your enemies when they come knocking. But he and his lusus have a very contentious and semi murderous relationship.

Hella (originally a water genasi) is a seadweller! no lusus shes just out in the ocean vibing and keeping it tight.

Davril (originally a halfling) is sort of bopped around various foster homes, and considers his most consistent family member to be his pet rat, Wink, who he eventually sprites and it is very cute but also Rat Enemies. Final boss is da giant rat who makes all OF da rules?? idk.

Esvele (originally a homebrew race similar to warforged, a human soul in a robot body) has kind of a combo of aradia and jades' robot situations? following the onset of a terminal illness, her mom (a talented scientist) built her a soulbot and she's been in there ever since. but robots don't die naturally so she ended up being passed down the line of guardianship from talented roboticist to talented roboticist throughout the 20th century, her chassis and power source being updated with whatever new technology as it came along. I like to think she eventually is able to do an aradia and come back god tiered somehow but idk, i sort of think its cool if she just stays a robot since thats how her og campaign went.

Asra (originally an aasimar) lives with her mom who is Very Important in her community (im thinking possibly the mayor of a small town) and asra has major gifted kid burnout about it.

Elis (ok hes not "originally" anything because i havent technically played him yet. hes a human wizard based on a random mini and set of dice i got in a blind bag last year and ive been trying to build him into something interesting ever since. im not even sure what kind of magic he DOES i just know hes some kind of wizard and im hoping developing his personality will inform what hes into. i mostly wanted an even number of humans and trolls for this and hes my most recent standby character ANYWAY) i dont have much for him hes just a lil guy. hes goth and eccentric and he likes wearing a lot of fucking layers.

[franki-lew-yo]

The Romantic (2009, R, Gothic Fantasy/Horror), aka the most forgotten animated film in the world

What if I told you there was a movie under serious threat of becoming lost media with no clear reason as to WHY it's been lost other than no one has apparently watched it besides me and a few people on Reddit? What if I told you that movie wasn't half bad and would no doubt have some interest peeked if anyone DID know about it?

The name of that movie is The Romantic.

It was released in 2009 and it's Rated R for nudity and sex scenes [insert Robbie Rotten meme here], though none of it too graphic. It was a pet project created by animator Michael P. Heneghan, originally starting as a flash project for his animation class before he expanded it into a feature film. The film was inspired by movies such as The Dark Crystal and Labyrinth, but what I see every time I look at it is a touch of Jhonen Vasquez, Tim Burton, and Roman Dirge- the guy behind Lenore the Cute Little Dead Girl. It's flash animation especially remind me of the puppet-rigged toons of the 2000s (again like Salad Fingers or Lenore). It's not bad, it's just not inherently 'feature film' quality flash, nor is it exceptionally artistic like Sita Sings the Blues in it's simplicity. Like, really, if you happen to find this thing it's not the worst animated project at all it's just amateur for a professional production. I've seen worse flash movies. Heck, if The Romantic were released in separate parts on youtube or Newgrounds as a series (ala Homestuck) I'm sure it would have been really successful and totally in it's element. But it wasn't.

Because next to no one has seen it and I'm lucky to have not only ever seen it when it was available for free but have also found it recently (hush hush, I ain't telling you how) I'm going to actually give you all a plot synopsis under the cut. There will be some details I leave out and I think I've spelled some characters names wrong. It's a bit of a surrealist film as well, so you might need some things explained.

Spoilers ahead:

The Romantic is set in an autumnal, surrealist world inhabited by humans and monsters and ruled by three gods; Po the goddess of love; Pik the god of Hate; and Pjorrc the god of time though Pjorrc was made to live inside a pumpkin moon as everything he touched rabidly aged and died.

((Tapestry art featuring the main three gods of the film.))

A young man (called “Romance” or “The Romantic” by the other characters) performs a bull sacrifice in order to summon Abbledepopa, the unseen creator of the other gods and ‘storyteller’ of the world. The sacrifice does not conjure Abbledepopa but, when Romance spares a monster that was ready to eat him, the monster tells him of a profit named Patience. Patience is a foul-mouthed dwarf living alone with an army of babies who points Romance in the direction of Po.

((Romance outside of Patience's house.))

Romance wants the god’s help because he has fallen out of love with his girlfriend. Po grants him his desire and restores his love only for Romance to return home and find his girlfriend with another man. Blinded by heartache and rage, Romance kills her. He then swears vengeance on the gods for ‘making’ him do it. In the midst of this vow, a corrupt prophet called Fat Daddy kills the queen of Vauxhaul (Romance's home) and her guards, and forges a new body for his newborn son with their bodies. Fat Daddy rallies the townsfolk behind him in supposedly finding the Queen’s murder into follow a new religion called "The Poetic End".

((Romance (right) besides the monster he spared at the beginning of the movie.))

Patience accompanies Romance on his quest and tells him to take Po’s mask, which hides her true face, once he kills her. Romance buys Po’s trust by weaving her a tapestry that tells her story: in the dawn of time Po and Pjorrc were in love. However, Pjorrc gradually became distant and Po became resentful when their daughter, Love, earned Po's original title as the god of romance and love.

In the present day, Romance sleeps with Po for over a year before finally killing her and taking her mask. He and Patience return to his home of Vauxhul only to be chased out by Fat Daddy’s personal army. They flee to Marshallton, the town nearest to the god Pik.

((Romance's hometown of Vauxhul. ))

The king of Marshallton, King Crookie, tells Romance of a prophecy he, Patience, Fat Daddy and all the gods are a part of and that the world is soon to change. Romance then fights and successfully kills Pik when he shows the god of hate his reflection in a mirror King Crookie gave him, but not before losing his hand to Pik.

When Romance comes down the mountain he learns from Patience that nine years have passed since his fight with Pik began. Patience reveals to Romance what Pik saw in the mirror that allowed Romance to take the killing blow; after Love had grown up and married, Po asked Pik to tell her where her husband was always running off to. Pik reluctantly revealed Pjorrc was disguising himself as a human and married a mortal woman. Po found Pjorrc and his pregnant second wife, forcing Pjorrc to leave his human family behind, but not before asking his wife to name their son “Patience”. In retaliation for his treachery, Po proceeded to sleep with fifty men and produce the fifty bastard children in Patience’s house.

((Fat Daddy, the main villain.))

Marshallton and the entire rest of the world has fallen to the rule of Fat Daddy, who captures Romance and Patience. Fat Daddy tortures Patience into telling him how to get to Pjorrc but is unable to convince Romance to take part in his ‘new world’ or give him Po’s mask. Romance and Patience escape and leave the village to be torn apart by the fifty babies Po had, now transformed into veracious monsters after Patience didn’t feed them for the past ten years. Romance confronts Patience when he realizes the latter is Pjorrc’s son. Patience calls Romance out on his mantra of vengeance and points out that all his decisions are his own, not the gods, and instructs him to seek Love herself in Po’s basement. Patience then attempts to confront Pjorrc but is cornered and killed by Fat Daddy before he can do so.

In Po’s basement, Romance finds Love nailed to a wall, her face torn off and half eaten by her deformed husband. Love tells Romance that Po ripped off her daughter’s face in rage over Pjorrc’s infidelity and Pjorrc did not intervene fast enough. Po then threw Love into her basement, turned Love’s husband into a monster, and wore her daughter’s face as a mask - which Romance had broken into pieces moments ago after Patience had shown him his face in King Crookie’s mirror. Romance then finds Pjorrc hanging himself. As he dies, Pjorrc tells Romance to take the hand Fat Daddy had cut off and sew it onto himself, which will in turn help Romance defeat Abbledepopa.

Romance traverses the wasteland and does not find Abbledepopa, but instead a golden loom. Having seen all the destruction he and others had caused, Romance sits upon the loom and accepts his fate as the new ‘storyteller’ of the world, as he begins weaving a new one...

---

I mentioned before the animation quality of the film and why maybe that caused people to overlook it. The only other thing I could complain about on a technical level with The Romantic is it's sound design. Some of the voices and music is a little too quiet and so all these key details I had to go through the film a few times to really piece together. But that leads me to the thing I like about this movie and I'm sure others would to: the lore.

It's very hard to create a new fantasy world w it's own customs, religions, history and rules out of the blue as any YA Harry Potter/Hunger Games ripoff book could tell you. The Romantic is so unique in how it handles the pantheon and culture of these three gods and their kin; really only four or five characters throughout the entire story aren't connected to the gods or prophecy in some way, as there's the main three gods, Abbeldepappa, and the prophets Patience, Love and Fat Daddy, who make up your main cast besides Romance. There's a lot that's intentionally left unexplained and other info that must be explained, like Pjorrc and Po's marriage and Romance's feelings towards the gods, if we want to understand the former. The movie is paced pretty well and knows when to follow up on what, it's just that again some of those animation and editting shortcomings might make it hard to understand...but I don't think THAT hard. Look, if someone can enjoy Starchaser: The Legend of Orin or even better surrealist world-building films ((Fantastic Planet comes to mind)), then I say there's no reason The Romantic wouldn't have a following. There's no other way I can articulate why and what doesn't work about the story except just to recommend you watch it yourselves, but before I get into that I want to talk themes...because I love the themes and tone of The Romantic.

I revisited The Romantic a week before I made myself watch Centaurworld and The Owl House for the first time...and what a week that was~! The Romantic has the vibe of those kinds of shows along with Adventure Time and Infinity Train ((so I hear, I haven't watched the latter)). It's surreal and you'll only marvel at 'woooah wut an acid trip' for so long before you get into the vibe of the universe. It also reminded me substantially of the Broadway musical Hadestown and not just because this movie is also a self-contained, somewhat self aware fable about the relationships between humans and gods - it's very raw in how the characters talk. It's very emotional and blunt in how kind and how cruel they can be, and it doesn't make excuses or really worships any one of them. Romance himself is the world's most likable Incel: he murders a woman he thought he needed to love and blames his emotions on the gods of those passions...except the gods AREN'T the manifestations of love, time, and hate - they simply dictate and oversee it in the lives of men. It's a dynamic I really like in religious works where Gods are powerful but not all knowing or puppet masters to everyone's design- they have morality too and there is only so much you can blame and get from them.

"You made your gods into excuses and your excuses into gods!"

-Patience. This here is a cool quote. I like this quote.

No matter what, The Romantic is not gonna be a film for everyone. We all have our tastes - I think I'm drawn to it and accepting because I've come to love these kind of worlds that used to keep me up at night - these trippy 70s inspired fantasy landscapes given a whole Avatar: The Last Airbender degree of worldbuilding and character worth. It also doesn't feel exploitive in it's violence, it's sexuality, it's grimmness - it doesn't feel like it's trying to hard or going over the top because it happens to be an adult animated film, something that I love in movies like 9 or Hair High but really turns me off in stuff like Sausage Party or Wizards. Whatever go watch The Romantic...

if you can.

-----

When I first saw this film in 2016 it was actually very accessible and was even uploaded to youtube by the creator himself. I don't know WHAT happened to Michael P. Heneghan, but simply put, the man's disappeared...like...REALLY disappeared.

Lookit his IMDB. He has The Romantic and a wapping two other projects to his name. His Twitter isn't very helpful either. He last updated in early 2020 and he says next to nothing about The Romantic. It's so odd that he would one day be happy with the film enough to host it on Vimeo and Youtube but then just cop out.

According to a Reddit user: "On Valentines Day 2011, Heneghan released the film for free online through all kinds of platforms including direct download, bittorrent, Vimeo, and even directly through Archive.org. He even joked about releasing a 300 gig uncompressed version.

I know I watched it on Vimeo probably as recently as 2016. Now I can't find it anywhere. The website is dead, the Vimeo video went private, even the archive.org version has been taken down. It really looks like he wanted to wipe it off the face of the internet. His newer website mentions it, but again, the Vimeo link is dead and even that website is closed for business."

It's weeeird. What happened Michael?

And yes, obviously, other people worked on the movie.

No - I can't find out anything about them either.

I'm betting on three theories at the moment: 1) this film is an SCP or some Candle Cove weirdness with only me and a handful of people ANYWHERE remembering it, 2) something weird is going on w Michael Heneghan and it involves too something about this film. It was a scam or a scheme or a hidden agenda weirdness, 3) Heneghan's doing okay he just doesn't like this film anymore and wants it hidden while he takes a break.

Look, I get it Michael! What was once our life's worth can become cringe as you improve as an artist - you're not the person making the stuff you were ten years ago...but you should still have the film kept alive somehow. Someway.

I'm seriously the only person to have ever made fan art of this movie on the internet. That just doesn't happen, and I don't think I like being in a fandom of one. The Romantic is a testament to the power of design and storytelling > animation quality itself. Too often I see people equate good animation with smooth animation, with a budget with squash and stretch. These animations are good but art is diverse and there's so many kinds of films out there, the value of the medium can't just be in one style/form. There's a lot of honestly wonderful pieces of art out there if you know where to look and you're willing to see where it leads you.

Don't let The Romantic be the most forgotten movie of all time. Reblog this post. Show it to your friends. PM the animation community reviewer people like Saberspark and someone who isn't Saberspark and smuggle them a copy.

Keep telling the story...

[salemruinseverything]

[don't worry, the mile long description is staying, that's my only accomplishment on this site aside from april 13, 2007, brobecks bmonday, and ferb time]

[i'm also liveblogging homestuck intermittently, go here [browser only] for a nice little organized archive. unlike everything else on tumblr it works better on mobile browser, my desktop theme doesn't like long posts]

hi, welcome to salemruinseverything dot tumble, your source for quality reblogs, horrible [affectionate] original posts, and frequent tøp-posting of varying quality [read: reblogging half of what's in the tag every time lore happens]. my name's salem. [mainly.] i use they/them, xe/xem, joy/joyr, ae/aer, it/its, and 🍭/🍭s pronouns [also mainly, you can check my pronouny for more of both of those.] [also, i do sometimes use he/him or she/her for myself, but id prefer if other people didn't.] this is mostly a bandom/shitposting blog, but i have been known to post about politics, animatronics, minecraft youtubers, the nintendo 3ds, and doll collecting very frequently. i once got someone to ask dallon weekes if he knew what furries were, and that is both my biggest accomplishment and the worst thing i've ever done. my only personality traits are being personally victimized by pete wentz, having a crush on gerard way, surviving solely on monster energy and spite, and being a kinnie which i refuse to be ashamed about anymore. i have a lot of ocs. feel free to read on if you want to know anything else but that's really all the info you need.

dni if: you're a queerphobe, an ace/aro exclusionist, anti-xenogenders/neopronouns, a terf/swerf, a pedo/map/nomap/anti-anti/whatever you guys are calling yourselves now, people who genuinely give any shred of a fuck about proship/antiship discourse, anti-kin of any sort, you actively support brendon urie or ronnie radke, preps/posers /mj [this list will also get amended at some point it's like 2 am as i write this] [also fair warning that this isn't an exhaustive list and i hardblock without hesitation if your vibes are off. no hard feelings unless you're a bigot]

hey if we're mutuals/i follow you please tag these w/ "salem dont look" [you absolutely don't have to but id appreciate it]: any photos of actual needles [talk of needles/cartoon needles are fine], minimalist aesthetics [especially in black and white], death from overdoses [other varieties of death are fine im emo & desensitized [mostly]], the names morgan & chey, any photos of posessed ybc!patrick, & agere stuff [i have nothing against y'all and you're very welcome here, but it's a big squick for me lmao]

a short list of things i post about [formerly a list of things i actively post about, but half of these fandoms are dead now and i'm too lazy to take them out]

my chemical romance

various decaydance bands

hating brendon urie

twenty øne piløts[? in my 2024? it's more likely than you think.]

i DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

the aforementioned bamd secretly being catboys

waterparks [the band]

sanders sides

various mcyts/associated streamers

homestuck[? in my 2024? it's m-]

tally hall. how did i forget tally hall.

brian david gilbert [& associated acts]

particularly polygon but i can no longer count that as an associated act

the heart rate of a mouse [i apologize in advance]

will wood, with or without the tapeworms

lalaloopsy [where is lalaloopsy tumblr. please]

american girl

some other general doll collecting stuff as well, but i do mainly collect the two mentioned above [mostly lalaloopsies. lalaloopsy fans please interact]

showbiz pizza/the rockafire explosion[/chuck e cheese occasionally]

disney parks [i hate the corporation but i am a sucker for a good dark ride]

scott pilgrim vs. the world [ramona flowers is my precious little meow meow. she's me fr. if she gets hurt i am killing everyone in this room and then myself]

i haven't seen a single episode of supernatural since i was 9 and have never played tf2 but castiel and scout are my special little guys so i post about them sometimes

this list will probably be changed at some point by the way this is just off the top of my head

tags i use:

#salem's random thoughts: any original textposts i make

#salem's shitposting at midnight again: my old textpost tag, is now mainly used for memes if at all

#top 10 gerard way gf moments: you know how i said one of my only personality traits was having a crush on gerard way? yeah

#salem please stop talking about your kandi: a catchall tag for any posts i make talking about/with pictures of my kandi

#awsten knight troll propaganda: hey did you know that awsten knight is a valid troll name? and that him typing in all caps all the time could technically be counted as a typing quirk? yeah [the tag that inevitably led to parxstuck]

#tally hall out boy cinematic universe: a mostly abandoned project wherein i tried to connect everything possible to tally hall and/or fall out boy

#salems selfies: this is just pictures of my face

#you're a hot mess and i'm falling for queue: uh. queue tag. yeah. mostly used when i hit post limit but sometimes i schedule things

#salems im okay liveblog: on the rare occasions my favorite webcomic, i'm okay (trust me), updates i am bound to liveblog the new episode so if you dont care about it then block that cause I Have Emotions About These Dumb Emo Teens

#salem answers a question: tag for asks

#my friends!!: things my friends post!

#seven of spiders: tag for my band!! it's mostly an actual band now!! we still don't have a drummer though

#salem's discography liveblogs: there were a lot of bands i was avoiding getting into just because i didn't know when or how to start with their music, so i now have a list of said bands and i've been going down the list, picking a band and listening to one of their albums until i finish their whole discography. used to be on sundays but i kind of just do them whenever i feel like it now. i also have individual tags for each band but you can find those by going through the tag. current tags to block if you don't wanna see this: #salems gorillaz liveblog, #paramore discography liveblog [my blacklist tags for this are inconsistent im sorry]

#vampireposting & #idogposting: i like vampires & idogs. self explanatory.

#salems ocs, #the murder crew, #dsmpjoys au, #parxstuck, #my chemical l'manberg au, & #the reprisians: stuff abt my ocs/aus! [please send me asks about them pls pls p] [note because i don't know where else to put it; dsmpjoys & mcl are on indefinite hiatus o7]

#every day i have strange sentences (?) put into my ask box by tumblr user full of teeth: dumb shit [affectionate] that everest sends me. still using his url from two urls ago because i'm lazy.

#liveblogging my breakdown: the posts that get a little too venty lmao, feel free to block if you don't wanna see that shit

#ftwwwposting: mcr play ftwww live challenge

this will also be updated cause i Know this isnt all the tags i use on a regular basis

other things i think are important to note:

all my posts are ok to rb unless they're specifically tagged w don't rb [although i guess this isn't much of an issue now that i can turn off reblogs but. still]

i don't actually ship any real people [at least not anymore- i sincerely apologise if you scroll down far enough to find unironic rpf-posting], but i do make a concerning amount of rpf jokes and am a throamie, and i try to tag any rpf-related content accordingly [i swear i'm posting about peterick in a platonic way i swear it on my life it's not my fault bandom has not caught onto the concept of duo names]

ask me to tag things if you need me to! it doesn't matter how "dumb" you think it is, i will try my hardest to tag it

the only thing i won't tag is blood, because i'm an mcr fan and that shit's so prevalent in this fandom that i don't even wanna try- however, i do tag gore, & i only rb cartoony/artistic gore, no realistic stuff :p

on that note let me know if i miss any tags so i can add them! [i do forget to tag things excruciatingly often, i'm sorry for that]

also on that note since people keep asking: i put tws on fall out boy/panic! at the disco because people asked me to [i don't anymore because i'm like 80% sure they both unfollowed me but. if you see older posts with those tws that's why]

ALSO on that note. i reblog so much mcyt stuff that it's basically impossible to tag it all at this point so like genuinely no offense but if you need that blacklisted please just unfollow stop harassing me to tag it

all the tw/cw tags i use are formatted "tw/cw [thing]", & mentions of that thing are tagged "tw/cw [thing] mention". i often forget which things i use cw tags for and which i use tw tags for so id recommend blocking both to protect yourself from my stupidity

please send me asks. i crave human interaction

i block people a lot, don't @ me- this is my space and i'm curating it how i want. literally, if you give me weird [in a bad way] enough vibes from a quick scroll through your blog after you follow me, i'm blocking you.

i threaten to kill other people and myself a lot. please know that i'm joking. murder is bad. suicide is also bad

my sideblogs: [ironically only three of these aren't related to my ocs]

@mediocreincorrectquotes: incorrect quotes of various fandoms

@sevenofspiders: blog for my band :p

@salems-edits: feel like the url sums that one up

@terribleocincorrectquotes: incorrect quotes of my ocs, horribly organized

@ooc-tiktok-comments: the uh. the url sums that one up too

@cottoncandy-system: system blog (hi we have osdd. apparently)

@bimbemo: aesthetic sideblog (HUGE flashing lights & eyestrain cw)

@its-just-ray-toro: its just ray toro. follow for ray toro on your dash

@bunnyboylyricbot: lyrics i like posted twice daily [when i remember to queue things]

@starstruck-n-m3tal: i am the #1 scholar on all things party poison

all of the sideblogs below are semi-rp, semi-aesthetic blogs for my ocs all of which are very inactive

@alluwantizbadboys - gabe kennedy

@sharpeasaknife - helena sharpe

@christmasknight - noelle knight

@thearistocrat - cain harmony

@mxs1n1st3r - celine sinister

@frmthrzr2thrzry - aaron knight

@b3aut1ful--quarant1n3 - razz roscoe

@voluntaryv1ct1m - jaxxie boyd

@began-and-ended-in-ellipses - cas roscoe

i also have a few secret sideblogs. you'll have to find them yourself

also i am now forcing you to look at these pictures of ryan ross.

[Image ID: several assorted photos of Ryan Ross. /end ID]

that's it thank you have a good day

[fbfh]

dave strider dating headcanons

1k words, spoiler free

warnings: some swearing, mentions of brief fears (spiders, heights, loud noises), some swearing

pairing: dave strider x gn reader, optional brief skirt wearing

a/n: I am still in act 4 of homestuck so pls !! no spoilers !! take my interpretation of the characters with a grain of salt !! 

also  why is there no homestuck x reader fics?????? Am I looking in the wrong place????? Why are there barely 80 dave x reader fics on ao3 and almost none on tumblr??????? Did homestuck’s popularity just miss the x reader fic train???????? if so I fully intend to fix that (this is the first two or so pages of my dave dating hcs doc, I’m on page five and show no signs of stopping)

also since I’m still in act 4 right now I’m only writing for Dave, probably Jade, John, and Rose (maybe some of the trolls but it’ll be on a case by case basis until I feel like I know them well enough to write for them)

aged up to 18+ for moderate sex jokes lol

=>

Someone told me once that they think Dave is the only character they know of who can match my feral chaotic energy

And honestly I have to agree

Dave is a very strategically feral, chaotic person

You know that thing where 

Wait I’ll see if I can link it here

I can’t find the post but 

I forget what it said verbatim

But basically that if you want to take the piss out of someone who has an Intellectual Superiority Complex you just need to act brazenly confident and sure about something you know is incorrect and as long as you don’t let on that you’re joking they’ll argue with you endlessly and it’s fucking hysterical

Dave does that

All the time

He will deadass argue with the Smart Kid in his class that the moon is fake for hours

He’ll argue endlessly that Terry Crews, Kevin Hart, and Kevin James are the same person shifting forms with randos online

He does that thing where he one ups conspiracies with more outlandish conspiracies

“The moon landing is fake”

“Uh, bro, you still believe in the moon?”

You got a truly delightful video once of him arguing with a smart kid in class about one of those ridiculous topics

Like glinda being a princess

He leans forward, tilts his glasses, and says in the most confident self assured voice

“Okay- riddle me this, bro,” 

He points to the guy

“If pee isn’t stored in the balls, where do you hold it? In your hands?”

The entire class erupts into screaming laughs

The teacher enters to the guy getting up in Dave’s face screaming about sperm and piss

Both of them got a detention

If you can match his irony and sense of humor beat for beat

His brain goes into in love overdrive

You basically never “break character” and it’s fucking immaculate

He didn’t know you could vibe so well with someone

Every bad joke you make

Every meme reference

Every act of idiocy for the sake of the joke

He falls harder

It’s kind of scary for him at first

Having these raw genuine feelings so close to him

He covers with humor as usual

But part of him is freaking out a little

It’s sort of like finding a possum in your house

And then you realize there’s more possums hidden around

Then you run into the bathroom, look in your closet, check the pantry

There are possums everywhere

They don’t seem mean

They’re actually kind of cute

But what the fuck

Aren’t possums usually supposed to stay outside?????

So yeah when he falls he falls hard

I might do Dave crushing on you hcs too

One of his favorite ways to spend time with you is just chilling together doing separate activities and periodically updating each other

He’ll be working on some sick beats 

You’ll be sitting on his bed doing something you love

Drawing, bullet journaling, blogging, editing videos

Whatever your thing is

It genuinely makes him feel so close to you to just

Be near you

He has this sort of deep quiet admiration for you

For a while he genuinely has no idea how to connect the two aspects of his feelings for you and how he’s used to expressing himself 

He feels like he can’t tell you how much he likes you cause like

That’s not swaggy bro

So a lot of his affection is in little ways

He knows all of your favorite snacks and drinks

Favorite candies and gum 

He will protect you from anything you’re afraid of

Spiders? Gets rid of them so fast you literally didn’t know it was there

Loud noises? Has you listen to his latest mixtape when you’re going through somewhere noisy

If you have any mental health problems or we you bet your ass he will do so much research on how to support a friend with [insert thing]

Picks up on a lot of your cues and mannerisms quickly

Knows exactly when to give you his jacket, when to show you the perfect meme, when to take a study break

When to just pull you into a random dance party

He really likes dancing badly with you

Just failing around and spinning you around

If you like to wear skirts he likes the way your skirt flows when he twirls you

It looks so flowy

Like water or something

His favorite part is after you’ve been dancing for a while

When the song ends or when you get tired

How you’ll both kind of slow down and laugh and catch your breath

You’re still holding his hand

And you’re standing really close to him

He thinks you’ve never looked more beautiful

He never wears his sunglasses when you dance

He claims it’s because he doesn’t want them to fly off

But it’s really bc he doesn’t want anything getting in the way of watching you laugh and smile so much

Oof he’s got it bad for you

[redantsunderneath]

The À la Recherche du Temps Perdu of gamer you tube videos

One recent mild obsession of mine is a >10 hour review of Cyberpunk 2077 that came out this week from Action Button dot Net (Tim Rogers), who used to be fun to read about video games in the aughts and who started doing long-ish entertaining videos for Kotaku a while back, but who now is doing marathon videos for his own youtube channel. Cyberpunk playlist:

Channel:

This all started because my kids mentioned a couple of weeks ago that super long youtubes attempting to exhaustively talk about a game were becoming a subgenre. I watched some dude's almost 8 hour Morrowind video until I stopped, but found AB.net's channel after not thinking about him for a decade, watched the 3.5 hour Doom one, and really dug it. The other genre examples I tried seem to be trying to find everything in-game to talk about in order to detail obsess the subject into submission. Rogers is doing something different.

You can call it new journalism (which arrived about four decades late to videogames over a decade ago but whose all-about-my-experience weirdly is the opposite of the idea of look-at-the-text-only "new criticism" of ye olde era, though Tim is clearly criticism not journalism) but I think it is something more interesting than that. It is more like the project of an (Mendelson’s) encyclopedic novel, trying to make a Ulysses of the late millennial gamer experience. There is a world map in these things individually and collectively - I haven't finished but this "season" but it has the feeling of really inspecting one by one the rooms of a childhood home. Moby Dick kept coming to mind (guy whose favorite book is Moby Dick: "I'm getting some Moby Dick vibes off of this") because of the feeling of narrative exhaustion, of discursive burnout. This is a thing Homestuck, Cerebus, Claremont's X-Men, the Worm (?maybe, haven't gotten too far there) give you as well as the obvious literary reference points.

David Foster Wallace isn't a bad comparison as there's a kind of diaphoretic almost horseshoe bipolar energy that seems to risk burnout (the hospital story is very IJ). All six vids cover different aspects of his life/development and there is a sense that the Cyberpunk one needs to be watched last as a more meta unifyer of the others (who am I kidding, but also yeah, that scans). There is, as those things above and early 10's Kanye, a feeling of obsessives with well developed craft giving over to an unmediated creative possession that they then can't help but hone because they are so good at their form. A kind of madness or channeled crisis wrought into art.

You miss a significant number of jokes if you aren't ready to pause and read text, which is insane. The Cyberpunk one is interesting as a piece of ergodic text, or at least cybertext, where there is a hidden substructure beneath his appeal to do a "choose your own adventure," with a "good ending" in there. If you read the comments (yes, on you tube, I know) there are people identifying as "5-6 ers" - there is just a kind of formal play going on that feels like experimental exploitation of how you do this kind of stuff on line that isn't an arg adjacent thing. There is even what feels like an annular narrative, a piece of himself that one needs to risk the parasocial police to try to find (I have not gone deep enough, but there is a ghost of something there).

There is a more general point about "everything goes in there" literary efforts that attempt to stake out an identity through unconcious overlapping magesteria that encompasses something bigger in the 40,000' reflection. Don't get me wrong, this isn't there yet. It is entertaining, experimental, interesting, and formative of something to come. But the frame is still small. We get a little early struggle with mortality, tar baby melee with an artistic form, a lot of social commentary, some pseudo-postmodernist, post-marxist division, philosophy, just a pinch off existential angst, but not a proper gaze into the abyss, no boxing with "God." That's a lot to ask for and it's only just suffering as a point of comparison with great art in mature fields. but there's always a season two and whatever this will conjure up in new creators' minds. Maybe the headline should read "the Velvet Underground of gamer you tube videos," but I feel like there is something here that in its modest aims is more along the lines of War and Peace ("Aggro and AFK"?) than a Pewds thing.

[bogkeep]

theo’s tarot collection

hi hello i suffer from a terrible ailment called I Keep Acquiring New Tarot Decks Even Though I Am A Tarot Newbie.... so i figured i could do a little writeup about my decks if anyone is interested in that :’) basically i started doing tarot in 2019 because i couldn’t get a hold of a therapist (i was put on a year long waitlist WAHOO) so i basically. self-medicated with tarot readings hahaha. i had a friend who gave me a lot of really good advice and had done some readings for me before who felt immensely comforting. the way i read them is like... it allows you to confront your situation and your emotions through a new angle, but you gotta be brave enough to do it - or ask someone to do it for you. it can be a really intense but also cathartic experience. it’s not for everyone! but i like it. i still consider myself a novice and still learning so i am not in ANY way trying to paint myself as a Knowledgabl Tarot Witch - in a perfect timeline that’s who i wish i was, but i’m ultimately just some guy with a solid appreciation for art and personal growth.

ANYWAY... onto my DECKS (the tumblr post will probably squish the quality outta my photos so i’m gonna link the URLs for Full View)

Children of Litha by Alexandria Huntington

i consider this my main and first deck (i am NOT counting the official homestuck deck i bought as a teen just because i wanted to look at the art. no offense to the homestuck deck i’m just not gonna use fandom decks)! i picked it out but my Tarot Friend gifted it to me... i think it’s a very good starter deck for me personally, and it’s the deck i’ve bonded with and used the most. i even put a fancy sticker on the box as part of the bonding process. i always feel so bad for all of my other decks because i haven’t been able to dedicate as much time for them as i have this one... so it’s definitely the deck i go to for the most accurate readings for myself. Vibes and Thematic Coherence: the art in this is so beautiful and elegant. the symbolism more or less draws on the classic smith-waite deck, but redrawn for its theme. i like that it has a very consistent imagery! out of the major arcana, the fool is the only fully human character - every other character is part animal in some way or other. then the suit of swords depicts birds, winged insects and the air element, coins depict ungulates and equines and earth, wands has felines and canines and fiery imagery, and cups has fish and creatures of and in the sea. the court cards have humans. the suit symbols are always depicted consistently, as white silhouettes. there are also two extra cards: the all and the void. Pamphlet: the reason i think this was a good starter deck is because both because the art feels very intuitive about what it depicts (to me, at least), the descriptions in the pamphlet describe what is happening and why the artist chose this motif for this card. it has honestly helped me remember the meanings a lot, because i’ll be reading the other decks and be like “oh that’s the octopus card i know what the octopus card is about”. there are also little poems next to the main descriptions that work as a pretty solid tl;dr for the core meanings. i also like that the court cards are referred to in the sense of like... a knight is “a young person with masculine energy” rather than “a young man”. it feels more fluid and vibe-y about gender than traditional decks ya feel. on a range from Abstract to Directness this one feels like it sits pretty comfortable in the middle, maybe leaning on Abstractness. it has always given me gentle instructions and advice.

Cardfeel: the cards are very smooth and nice with gold edges. the cards are not NOT solid, but i wish they had been a little thicker because i’m always afraid i’m going to accidentally damage them - but that’s probably a feeling i have about most of my possessions tbh!! i think they’re a good size, too, at least for my small hands. they’re more on the long/slender side so they are good for me to shuffle. i also like the box, it’s a hard flip box with a magnet. i think u can’t go wrong with that. this is the deck i’ve travelled with the most (did u know hotel beds are the best tarot reading spaces. for some reason they just Work). The Spacious Tarot by Annie Ruygt and Carrie Mallon

this is one i really like a lot and want to use more! i absolutely adore the concept of it, but it’s a little harder for me to read than the Litha one. Vibes and Thematic Coherence: this one is like!!! it’s about the open space and the quietness. the vibes are IMMACULATE. the cards aren’t filled to the brim with happenstance and symbolism, but they each feel like a little refuge. very meditative. i also like that the court cards are not gendered at all - there is no page, knight, queen and king, but rather child, explorer, guardian and elder. i am really into that, especially as steps of mastery of their suit. i do think that this deck is probably easier to read if you’re more experienced with tarot meanings and symbolisms, because the illustrations aren’t necessarily that intuitive. Pamphlet: i haven’t read through this one very much, but i think it’s more on the abstract side of the Abstract to Direct scale. it might just feel like that because it describes what the card symbolizes without drawing much on what the card depicts - it is generally a pretty abstract and meditative deck. i like it for what it is! but it’s harder for me to read than my main Litha deck. Cardfeel: there’s something about the cardfeel i wish was different. they’re perfectly ok cards, they’re smooth and not too thin, but i still wish they had had more heft or something. while the cards fit very well into my hands i think maybe they could’ve been Larger to emphasize their motifs of openness and space. or texture. or gilded edges. i really don’t know what i want. the box however is very good and easy to open and use!! never underestimate a good box.

Tarot of the Divine by Yoshi Toshitani

this is a deck i Had To Get because i knew the artist was working on it and i was always Planning To... it is not a deck i use very often but i absolutey adore it. you can also get it with an accompanying fairytale book, i thought i had ordered that but i was Wronge. Vibes and Thematic Coherency: it depicts motifs and characters from stories, myths, and fairytales from a vast variety of cultures. it’s AMAZING. the art is so clean and crisp and i was VERY EXCITED to find a card drawing on a sami story (page of coins)! i don’t have a lot to say except that yoshi yoshitani has done some incredible work on this. Pamphlet: while i do not have the Fairytale Book edition, the pamphlet is really super nice because it shows pictures of the cards, lists what story it depicts and where the story is from, gives a short description for how this scene or character embodies the card. it then lists some of the Card Characteristics beneath. very simple but very nice. i really like pamphlets that explain Why the artist picked the motifs they did - for me personally it really helps me connect to the deck and their symbols. it’s probably more on the Direct side of the scale thanks to this. Cardfeel: these are textured!! they feel like the playing card deck my grandmother has, which feels apt to me. textures make the cards feel solid to me. they’re also a very nice size to hold. the edges are not guilded, but with the white frames it looks good and nice. the box is nice but also Large, possibly to fit with the book? might not be ideal for travel, but there’s nothing stopping you from getting a different box or pouch.

The Star Spinner Tarot by Trung Le Nguyen

my most recent deck... i KNEW about the artist and the deck from before, but wasn’t PLANNING to get it, but then i saw it in the comic book store and i wasn’t able to pass it by. no regrets, it’s a wonderful deck. Vibes and Thematic Coherence: absolutely lovely art and style. it’s another deck drawing on fairytale themed motifs. i’m loving the use of colors and circles. it also has four different cards for the Lovers so you can choose which one(s) speak to you the most, something i think is just wonderful. i think the only thing i found a little... odd? was that the suit of Wands looks kinda same-y, which isn’t a bad thing, but it was the only suit that looked that way to me. they’re still very very nice. ALSO THE BACK OF THE CARDS ARE SHINY. I JUST THINK THAT’S VERY LOVELY. as a Physical Product these are chef’s kiss. Pamphlet: on the Abstract to Directness scale, these are VERY DIRECT. the pamphlet doesn’t say a lot about why the cards depict what they do, but go straight into card meaning, and in a very unambiguous way. i think it can both work very well, leaving you little room to avoid your feelings, but it also has a higher margin to miss completely. for being such a cutesy deck full of fairies the pamphlet is definitely giving you a smack at the side of your head. i haven’t used this deck a lot yet due to its newness, but i definitely want to try it out more to see what it does to me.

Cardfeel: out of all of my decks i think this has the best cardfeel... the cards feel really solid, and have a very good size that feel just right for them. like i sort of fell in love with the deck when i actually started shuffling it and browsing the cards. buying cards - especially on the internet - can be a gamble because you Can’t Know The Cardfeel. with decks like the Spacious Tarot i got a little dissappointed, but this one was a very pleasant surprise. also the box is very good and look like a work of art. The Fyodor Pavlov Tarot

honestly one of my new favourite decks that i ABSOLUTELY am going to use more and become more familiar with. also a deck that i knew the artist was working on, and supported the kickstarter the moment it was announced. my deck also came with two Magician cards and i don’t know why. extra wizard for me??? Vibes and Thematic Coherence: the look and feel of this deck is Immaculate. it looks very classical and traditional (and absolutely gorgeous), it is grounded in the classical smith-waite imagery but Expands Upon It, draws on the diversity of human culture and experiences... also loving the energy of “THIS CARD IS TRANS NOW AND THERE’S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT” many cards have (most famously the Lovers, but i don’t want to post pics of any of the cards depicting nudity or risqué themes on tumblr). i absolutely adore the knight of coins card (THE HORSE IS HIS FRIEND AND SERVICE ANIMAL!!). it’s just Really Very Good. also the backside has pretty Shiny stars and i like it. Pamphlet: i really like this one. it is a deeply personal pamphlet, where fyodor pavlov directly discusses his relationship to the cards and why he chose the motifs he did. it feels really grounded in the world we live in, and also such a vulnerable thing to share with us all. it’s on the Direct side of the scale without necessarily telling you “the card is definitely this one thing”. my only wish is that it was easier to navigate at a glance. Cardfeel: THEY ARE TEXTURED!!! these cards are definitely long and slender and benefit someone with larger hands than mine, but i still like them a lot. i do wish they had been a smidge heavier just so i wouldn’t worry so much about damaging them... but i don’t want to be ungrateful. the deck and the box are wonderfully crafted. The Botanica Tarot by Kevin Jay Stanton

oh boy did i support the kickstarter for this one... i had actually bought the major arcana when it was the only version available, and then the artist decided to make a full deck. it’s an absolute work of art. Vibes and Thematic Coherence: oh boy oh boy does it serve vibes and thematic coherence. it’s Plants all the way down, OBVIOUSLY, but also like... every card in the minor arcana depicts their suit in its own way. like the range of coins/currency from various times and cultures?? AMAZING. looking at the art of this deck is a DELIGHT. every card manages to be beautiful and interesting despite there not being a single living creature depicted on any of them. i WILL say they, same as the spacious tarot, are not the most intuitive to read if you’re not super familiar with either the Plants or the meanings of the cards. Pamphlet: you can fit so much plant knowledge in this one. i got a version of the deck with a beautiful little book, but there’s also a small pamphlet that follows the deck itself (which i admittedly have not looked too closely at yet). there’s descriptions for why this specific plant has been chosen for each card, and then some Card Meaning Keywords. so definitely on the Abstract side of my imaginary tarot pamphlet scale, because you mostly have plant symbolism to go on. i haven’t done a lot of readings with this deck, i’ll be honest - but it’s a beautiful treasure that i adore. Cardfeel: they’re Smoothe and Guilded edges. they can feel a little wide for my hands, but not so much that i cannot shuffle. i think maybe a smidge of texture wouldve been good with this deck since it would fit the look of the painted art. i also did get like... a big kickstarter reward version of this deck. it came in a tin box with extra treasures and a cloth and pins... the actual card box itself is beautiful to look at, but i have to say that the one i got is VERY HARD TO OPEN. i might transfer the cards into a pouch if i want to be reading them more often. IKEA deck

yes this is a meme deck and i don’t really use it but I WANTED TO SHARE... i think the major arcana is very cool and funny, but i was dissappointed to find that the suit cards are just “ikea part but Multiple Times”. it also does not come with a pamphlet. also yes yes it’s funny that the names of the cards are spelled in a “silly ikea word language” BUT IKEA NAMES ARE JUST SWEDISH....... IT’S NOT A SECRET LANGUAGE IT’S JUST SWEDISH............ it’s a funny deck to have and it doesn’t take up much space so eh! shrugs!!! The Lubanko Tarot by Emily Lubanko

another kickstarter deck... it’s gorgeous but there is a chance i might gift it to someone else. not because i regret getting it or don’t like it, but because i already have so many decks that speak to me, while this one gives me vibes of serving someone else better. does that make any sense? i admittedly haven’t looked at the pamplet so much so i think i’m going to skip that description for this one. Vibes and Thematic Coherency: the MOVEMENT and the COLORS... it’s Capturing Feelings in a really good way. i mean. i got it for the vibes and it’s serving vibes. Cardfeel: Smoothe Cards. shiny silver edges, like a slippery fish in a rapid river. it feels good and right for this deck. also good box. i know most of these decks have Good Box, it’s just the botanica one that let me down by being difficult. The Oriens Tarot by AmbiSun

i don’t have this deck anymore, i gifted it to my boyfriend... i found these pics on my twitter. it’s one of the first decks i supported on kickstarter and it’s VERY pretty, and it has HOLOGRAPHIC RAINBOW EDGES HOT DAMN. it’s another one of those instances where i Yearned for it and then found that it didn’t fit me as well as i had hoped. tarot is just one of those things where you have to find what Works for you. at this time the children of litha was working so well for me and i really liked the depiction of animals in it, i wasn’t able to connect to another animal deck in the same way... and it was before my tarot collection snowballed into what i have now. C’EST LA VIE ... i don’t have a smith-waite deck. i’m a fake tarot fan. i am however familiarizing myself by following Jessica Dore on twitter and subscribing to her monthly newsletters. i really love how she talks about these cards and how she interprets them.

[runespoor7]

locked tomb ramblings

devoured gideon the ninth and harrow the ninth and i Love Everyone In This Bar

ALL OF THE SPOILERS below this line

- i’d unfortunately come across the name Ianthe a few times on tumblr, way more than any other non Gideon or Harrow name, so I knew to keep an eye out for her (in every meaning of the word, ohohoho), which spoiled the reveal about her importance a little

- knew harrow was going to be my fave at the early reveal of Baby Harrow, Age Ten, Hiding The Fact Her Parents Are Dead By Animating Their Corpses.

- that moment at the end of gtn when Corona is wailing bc Ianthe didn’t take her, and you go oh so it’s MUCH MORE incesty than merely the vibes in ianthe’s dialogue, huh

- (me, when the plot of gtn goes on and corona folds every time ianthe takes a decision: *eyes emoji*)

- the homestuck energy is off the charts, i love it. it’s so baroque and the characters are so funny and we are definitely on bad guys’ side!

- necrolord prime, please, sir, is it not enough that you are an immortal emperor with armies of necromancers deploying 15y-olds on the frontlines to keep your empire expanding? necrolord prime????? (he is awful, like the vast majority of this cast, i love him)

- OH HELLO ACT V PART 2

- the previous lyctors are ancestors, in homestuck vibes

- in homestuck vibes: bby harrow with her dead parents she moves around like puppets. that’s a lusus thing. that’s a terezi thing. (rose as a troll gets terezi things.)

- still in homestuck vibes, dearly love the fragmentary world-building and the fact that it’s all horrible (15y-olds on the frontlines!!!!), but culturally speaking it’s taken for granted. we don’t see ppl going on rants on how it’s Unhealthy or Wrong. we do get Gideon realizing it’s jarring, after all, to imagine these kids in a war! but that’s very different

- (was Cam already side-eyeing the fuck out of that. Cam and Palamedes are strong contenders for it, and Cam clearly Hides Stuff-- I presume BoE isn’t as positive as the cult of the Signless was in Homestuck, but was she already involved?)

- hi yeah the fact that 100% of the remaining Lyctors were lowkey betraying John is hilarious

- mercymorn <3 <3 <3 (i: like the shouty ones)

- bby harrow saw a woman in a box and fell in love THIS IS DEEPLY AND WEIRDLY UTENAESQUE

- john is a fantastic akio figure. his take on adulthood and what he’s peddling is very different from what akio did, but he’s the character most obviously buying into gendered roles and expectations? the way he talks about his thing with “Annabel Lee” is nothing but expected. (It’s only through what others tell us, especially Augustine, that we know there’s a lot more to it.)

- (john telling the first gideon he’d have forgiven gideon banging commander wake reads very Gender)

- the pool sceneTM

- the codependency!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- gideon checking there aren’t bones booby-trapping the place she’s waiting for her shuffle and harrow spending the night before booby-trapping it better :)

- the number of times i screamed silently about kismessitude feels (harrow’s pitch soup brings all the girls to the yard?)

- *hateshipping mercy and augustine and staring right at them, daring them to say a word*

- wish i’d been more able to focus on the first part of htn instead of going wtf wtf wt

- ianthe never met a bad decision she didn’t want to take home, i’m not even disappointed or surprised or angry, either at her or at myself. ofc she was going to side with god. (probably so she can vanquish him herself later and set herself up as goddess empress, i’m sure she thinks she can fix things better that he can) (i am extremely curious about the things ianthe sees when she screams. what does she see in the river?) (i hope she lets corona save her.)

- (IANTHE LYING TO HARROW ABOUT NOT SEEING THE CORPSE THOUGH Y I K E S. Ianthe (derogatory)!!!!!!)

- absolutely loved the dream bubbles, LOVED that characters who weren’t explored/were sidelined early got their chance here!!

- nothing could have prepared me for Ortus getting a dignity and nuanced characterization and all that in htn, and i <333333333

- there’s an entire thing about the way fiction and memory and history and reality affect one another, especially in htn - it’s a malleable thing, Harrow’s memory is malleable and Ortus’ poem recalls a version of Matthis Nonius that isn’t who the man was, but how he’s remembered. “Is this how it happens?” Abigail the historian not letting Harrow get lost in alternate facts. And that reminds us to be careful of John’s version of Alecto, of BoE’s version of the facts, but also it’s beautiful. we make stories out of things and we make myth.

[rosespecting]

ANARCHISTIC CLASSPECTING #1 - RAGE AND HOPE TRANSCRIPT

episode here: x

this is NOT going to be very well formatted but I care about people who can't listen to podcasts so I'm going to put words on a screen. long as fuck under the read more. very comical lies hither and thither because I hadn't decided what exactly I wanted this to be yet.

if you're listening to this you are fucking insane. cause I'm just gonna ramble about classpecting for like an hour or some shit. this is the raw audio. I decided to record the raw audio of me just kind of rambling about classpecting and then I'm gonna write it down in a post on my blog rosespecting. and I decided that if you just wanna listen to me just talk for a while rather than read that thing you can do that, idk why I'm explaining this you already know all of this let's get into it

classpecting has been kind of methodicalized, if you know what I mean. and I've done a lot of that. I mean, I made a whole guide thing, and I think that that is, uh, good, I like my guide, but I do think that it is a little bit dishonest, but I also think that pretty much anything regarding classpecting is a little bit dishonest. I don't think that I can possibly convey to you the truth of classpecting, I think that it is something that you need to feel for yourself, you need to identify these things, and if you don't then you're gonna be lost, you're gonna be digging at stones, shoveling rocks, and you're not gonna get anywhere. and that sucks. for you.

and uh, I decided that you know, the only people that care about classpecting are homestuck fans. that's not true, but it's kinda true. and most of you homestuck fans have read homestuck. I assume the majority at this point. there was a time when that was not the case, but at this point I would assume the majority of homestuck fans have read homestuck.

so here's the thing. classpecting was never meant to be more than a vibe, you know? hussie didn't want it to be more than just like. "yo this guy is like... kind of a knight of... blood maybe. let's call him karkat." obviously hussie put a lot of thought into a lot of things, but I legitimtately don't think that classpecting was ever a huge priority, and I think that that is entirely understandable, because I think that it is very much so... a thing made from theming, and imagery, and we've refined it into this rigid thing, but it's never been a rigid thing.

in skaia alone, I've talked about this on my blog before, it's a malleable thing. you can be different from a seer of light, for instance, but then you're just in a doomed timeline. you're just not the right kind of seer of light. but ultimately, if that was the right timeline, you probably wouldn't be registered as a seer of light. you would be registered as like... a fucking mage of hope. that's a classpecting person, right? yeah. so in another universe that's who I am. I don't know anything about them really so I'm gonna avoid pronouns.

but so classpecting is this very loose thing that we've refined and I kinda wanna just discuss it in a less methodical way because I don't think it was ever meant to be that. and I would be lying if I said I don't think it's good that it has been. I think it's brought a lot more appeal to a lot of people,b ut it also means that a lot of people are missing out on what it really is, myself include. I ruined classpecting for myself in a lot of ways by making it this methodical thing. by putting harsher rules to it than there needs to be or should be.

because classpecting is not... a science. well it is a science. but it's not a strict science. some sciences are like you look at the plant and you're like in ten days i think this plant will be eight inches taller if I use this soil and then you use that soil and you use a plant that's not in that soil, that's in like other soil, and that soil maybe it changes things maybe it doesn't you do this like fifty times and then you've got evidence, and maybe you can point out a correlation, maybe some causaition, who knows.

and so it's kind of a science, but it's not that science if you know what I mean, which I hope you do because we're already like six and a half minutes in. uh, okay, um

so hope. i'm gonna start with hope, I feel like I have done a disservice to hope in the refining of classpecting, the systemizing of it. more than most other aspects. hope is not really something that can or should be tied down and I think that rage is the same way. rage is the aspect that I think is the hardest to put into words, and I think that is why it is so easily misrepresented and misunderstood, but i'm gonna start with hope becaus eI want to talk about hope

namely because when I was younger, when I was about 13, I've said previously that if I had not been a seer of light I would've been a seer of mind, and that is a lie. when I was thirteen I kind of consciously chose between what I saw as seer of light and something I saw as seer of mind but it was actually me choosing between some sort of hope player and seer of light. I don't know if I would've still been a seer if I remained as hopey as I was, but I was a very hope filled child. I think you could say a lot of children are, but I really really embodied that.

and to this day I still hold a lot of the aspect hope in me. I am unrepentantly optimistic. oit's kind of horrifying. and so much of what I see as me being lucky is just accepting circumstances as they come. I'll try to get a certain result and then I get something else and I'm like "oh, well that result's probably better." and I justify it to myself, and then I feel this truth to it that I put faith into. and I call it me being really lucky.

and when I was thirteen, no, yeah, about thirteen, I remember I was at a fair with my best friend at the time. and if you aren't aware I am nonbinary. anyone who's gotten this far who cares enough about this probably knows that. I don't know. but at the time I was just a tiny little boy, uhhh. but more importantly I was a tiny little boy who thought... that uh, that he was a tiny little girl. this is not how I usually talk about gender, but [laughs]

I remember I used to talk with my best friend a lot about hypotheticals in which one or both of us became girls, and this night it came up for some reason and then my friend and also some random girl we met decided to pretend that I had suddenly magically turned into a girl, and I... knew? on a very real level that it wasn't true. but I also believed it. not in any tangible way, but as I played along it was less me playing, and more me... living that. and that was one of the most magical nights of my life.

and I have often, in recent times, described the difference between hope and light, in my experience at least, as feeling magic int he case of hope, and understanding magic in the case of light, and I am glad that I understand it, but I do think that... when you know a magic trick, how it's done, it no longer has that ability to capture you. that's osmething that I've learned in my acceptance of void, which...

biggest part of this, the thesis, is that as it turns out. aspects blend a lot. it's a very muddy sort of thing. and so I've been coming to accept all of the aspects a lot more and. I am very happy for that. I am very happy that my understanding is no longer in that rigid, honestly "lighty" perspective. seer-y. cause. I am a seer of light, but I don't need to let it paint everything to the extent that it did. I think that that instinct is not healthy.

I don't think you should strive to be the best of your classpect, regardless of what it is, I think ultimately you should be striving to do whatever it is you're striving to be beyond that. you should be working on your life, not on matching this image that you have in your head of what you should be. focus instead of being something. and refine it.

you know, figure out what works for you, explore. some deep part of me has this feeling that like "oh if you changed your classpect then it just means that you were that most recent one all along" but idk. It's really easy to reframe your past. it is obscenely easy to reframe your past. you can bend the classes and aspects to be whatever you want, ultimately. I have seen that firsthand, I have seen some _wild_ people. and I don't think that that's good. I think it's important to meet it on the level that it's at, and to understand that it...

I don't want to say that you shouldn't put yourself into it, because if anything I'm saying the opposite, but you shouldn't enforce yourself on it. you shouldn't paint it in your image, you should... let it... be a part of your paint? idk

aspects are very interesting. and classes are... less interesting, to me, but also interest, specifically in the way that they are categorized. I think that the idea of active and passive classes, and of counterparts, and of inversion, it's all... very fun? and very engaging. but I think it's kind of bullshit. but I also think it's real.

I hold that position with a lot of things, because very rarely is something completely fake or completely real, and more often than you'd think I think things are often both completely fake And completely real. which I guess is looping back to hope and rage. tihs is a fun little journey that we're gonna go on, so rage.

rage is a very difficult aspect to pin down. because... for a long time, I could not understand how a person could be a rage player, because rage in text is just... a facet of people, but it can't be all that you are. and that's because I wasn't looking at it as rage, I was looking at it as these words that I'd written down that were rage, that are rage, but not all of it, and I think that rage is done quite a disservice by being looked at in a formal lens, I guess.

because rage is a very raw experience. rage is possibly, probably paired with hope, the most raw aspect, the least easy to really define. because I mean, when I was explaining hope, I was just tlaking about magic. magic is such- it's just a word. we apply to so many things that aren't magic, but we don't know how to explain them any better, so we say.. . magic.

and rage is the... a counterpart to that. and it's so interesting how this thing which is based in skepticism, in opposition, inherently, is opposing something that isn't really real. and that's where it comes in, I think. rage is . yes, about things that are wrong, things that aren't real, but it's not just about things that aren't real, it's about things that aren't... real. and that probably lost more than half of you, but I don't know how I'm going to explain that better

rage is when you look at someone... and you can tell that they are not who they are putting themselves out to be. they are someone who looks like they have everything altogether, who looks like they really really know what they're doing, and it is true to them, but it's not.

rage is when you close your eyes and you dont' see anything. the moments when there's not flashing colors, little morphy blobs, or your imagination. when it is just the back of your eyelids, and less than that, really, because I don't think you're processing the back of your eyelids, you're processing this darkness, this nothing, this lack of reality. oh god, i'm, this is really going off the rails.

listen, okay, that's probably the best I can give for rage. and... we're already 21 minutes into this. so. rage and hope are like that, and then void and light, I've compared these four aspects a lot, because on paper hope and rage are just... kind of more... raw versions of light and void, but in reality that's not... true? that's not really how things work. you can't really compare things in that way, with this, because it's actively opposing that idea.

that's what classpecting is, it's... an opposition to these rigid ideas that I love. and I think that's why I love classpecting so much? because it's a challenge for me. I have been working on this for years. over like. oh my god, a decade, on and off, and I still don't understand it entirely, and I think I could spend the rest of my life thinking about this and figuring it out more and more for me. and it's going to be different for you, I can't make it not different for you, because classpecting is a personal thing, and...

let's talk about classes. so. inversion is... a really cool idea. and classes are a really cool idea. and I think that the reason why classes are not as interesting to me is because I have done the same thing with them as I did with aspects, and I haven't repaired it yet. classes are not a rigid thing. they can't be, and in my mind, they're more rigid than aspects, that is an inherent truth in my brain, but I don't think that's true.

classes are how you do things, and how you do things... is honestly less rigid than how you think things. there's only... I mean, both are infinite, is the thing, it's capturing infinites, ultimately, no matter what you do that is what this is. and that is inherently going to have flaws. classpecting is imperfect, and it always will be, but it's imperfect in a way that I feel is very helpful. for me, at least, and I assume anyone who's 25 fucking minutes into this. uh.

classpecting is... weird. I need to piss, I'll continue this later.

[loser-writings]

HC || Fandoms they were in

This is pretty much just a crack drabble since I am currently attempting to catch up to all of the requests! Thank you for being Patient with me!

Dabi

This gremlin knows what Homestuck is and can’t stand the fact that he understands the references Toga makes to it. Also possibly one of the few who has actually read homestuck on this list, and won’t hesitate to correct Toga or Shigaraki if they fuck up a fact.

He also really is into The Walking Dead. You can’t tell me that Kurogiri doesn’t have a TV set up somewhere in the bar so he and Shigaraki can sit and watch. This does end up with the majority of the league having a once a week get together where Jin gets Pizza, Toga gets several boxes of soda for them, and Shigaraki sets up everything. 

Denki Kaminari

This bitch was into homestuck. Like he wasn’t just into homestuck, he was INTO homestuck. Most likely one of those kids that used to jump on Omegle in a shitty cosplay for those homestuck Omegle cosplay meets the fandom used to do. He also totally has a genderbent Nepeta cosplay, a Dave strider cosplay, and a Jake cosplay SOMEWHERE. Most likely to accidentally wear a homestuck shirt to class.

Never once picked up a Harry Potter book or watched the movie, but you know this kid has a hufflepuff robe in his closet and some hufflepuff merch. He doesn’t know shit about the actual canon since he is just there to vibe

Really into Kpop. BTS, Blackpink, ITZY, EXO, Ikon, BlockB, BigBang minus Seungri cause he is icky, SuperJunior, NCT, WINNER, Got7, Red Velvet, (F)x, and more. Like you can’t tell me this guy doesn’t listen to girl groups and shit like BTS. (His bias has to be J-hope) He also bops with Mina the most. These two also most likely post dance covers of the songs to instagram and TikTok, so they have quite the following. (But their best video was their “Boy In love” cover they did with Kirishima, Deku, Shoto,Jirou, Momo, and Bakugo.)

This kid was also into Five nights at Freddy. He owns all of the games and will still play them with the Bakusquad, but he is pretty quiet about this fandom just because of how BULLIED he was for enjoying it. 

LOVES Danganronpa too. Bakusquad do a weekly game night and they all went through all of the games. Let’s just say Denki cried a LOT at the deaths. Like a lot. (He may have a few cosplays of his own too)

Eijiro Kirishima

Kirishima liked Supernatural just because of how manly Sam and Dean are. Like fuck yeah, he wants a chevy impala too cause it is a beautiful car and wants to know how to protect yourself from shit like demons and angels. He never did much besides watch the show, cry a lot, and try to draw the characters. (Also he had a crush on Dean just cause of how badass and manly he is, but nobody can blame him)

He totally sat and watched Denki play Undertale, so he knows all about it. His favorite character is Undyne and he actually cried when they beat her in Genocide mode cause holy shit dude. That sucked. Oh and Sans. Fuck Sans.

He enjoys Kpop and will listen to it with the Bakusquad. He really admires BTS for how much of an impact they have made not only on his friends, but also the world itself and you can’t tell me that this guy doesn’t think the world of Kim Namjoon. Like he listens to Mono on repeat and is such a big RM fanboy. Also really likes Bigbang (He thinks Daesungs voice is so nice and will sleep to his singing if he could), and Kyungsoo is his favorite in Exo. Cried when Bigbang started coming back from the Military, and cried harder when Kyungsoo had to leave.

Danganronpa is a game he really enjoyed with his friends and will even replay from time to time. He gravitates towards the really manly characters, but some others have spots in his heart. Mondo, Sakura, Gundham, Nekomaru, Kaito, and Gonta were his favorites. Let’s just say the game didn’t treat him well.

Fumikage Tokoyami

He ended up picking up the Harry Potter books and fell in love with the world itself. You can’t tell me this guy doesn't have a limited edition trunk set of the books hidden in plain sight. Like everyone thinks that the trunk holds something like crystals or some bones or knives but nah. It’s just his Harry potter books. Oh and Midnight totally gave him a Ravenclaw scarf around the holidays. You can’t tell me otherwise.

Death note? Death note. Only to episode 25 though. 25 happened and he just hasn’t continued watching cause it isn’t the fucking same.

Hitoshi Shinsou

Shinsou liked Supernatural for a while, but he eventually lost interest. He did his best to also never get involved with much of the fandom since it honestly scared him a bit, but his fear didn’t stop him from posting some theories into discussion boards.

He listens to Kpop a bit since he hangs out with Denki a lot and found out he really enjoys Ikon, BlockB, BTS, 

Bitch was in the Creepypasta Fandom. Like not even the good ones, he was into Jeff the killer and Eyeless jack and all of those ones. Sure, he would listen to the others and read the crappy ones, but he had a phase he is mildly ashamed of now.

This kid loves everything relating to Stephen King. He will have conversations with Aizawa and Hizashi about the books, and they all agree that Kings writing can rather be extremely amazing, or be the equivalent of a 13 year old attempting to write smut for the first time. It’s so damn funny to him

Hizashi Yamada

He has read all of the harry potter books and actually enjoys them quite a bit, but he tries not to let that show too much. He does have a Slytherin lanyard that holds his keys though that Denki had mentioned. It managed to get Mic off track for the class period when he started discussing the books with the students (Mainly Izuku, Tokoyami, and Denki)

He watches The walking dead with Aizawa 

Actually bops to Kpop after the Bakusquad introduces it to him. Massive RM fanboy so he and Kirishima will occasionally go off about how admirable and badass he is. Like RM taught himself english just from watching Friends??? And Hizashi admires that so much. He also loves diving deeper into their lyrics since they normally have such good meanings.

Izuku Midoriya

Oh he loves Harry potter so damn much. He has the books on his shelf, a Gryffindor robe in his closet, a full uniform, and several wands. He is such a nerd so you can’t tell me he doesn’t have a special notebook that has notes on the spells, character analysis, and a variety of different facts.

Really enjoys listening to BTS! He doesn’t know much about other kpop groups, but he really enjoys dancing with Mina and Denki (even if Izuku has 2 left feet and struggles with dancing)

Had a Dragonball phase. Like this kid loVEs Dragonball. It’s actually one of the reasons why he and Katsuki grew to be friends since they both watched the show. They would talk about how they would beat Frieza or the Ginyu squad all of the time.

Katsuki Bakugo

This bastard finds himself actually enjoying Kpop after Mina and Denki go off about their favorite bands, and he really finds himself enjoying BTS, Day6, and SHINee. 

Danganronpa was a game he experienced with his friends and FUCK was it an adventure for him. He got really invested with the story and for a while, the Bakusquad chat was active as hell because of all of the theories he had. He fucking HATED Byakuya, actually shed some tears for Fuyuhikos’ character development and Gundhams death, and was about to throw hands during the 4th chapter of V3. It was a Rollercoaster of emotions, but he loved every moment of it.

This kid had a Dragonball Z phase. No shit he would wake up, watch an episode of Goku screaming, and then go out to play. Honestly this routine started when he was 5 and he will still occasionally watch it. He still loves Dragonball, and he totally has a collection of dragonballs somewhere.

After Shoto and Momo watch Rupauls Drag race in the Common room, He gets hooked. His dad is a fashion designer, so he finds himself really enjoying the fashion aspect of the show as well as the makeup part of it all. He actually does Minas’ makeup occasionally and once people start finding out, he becomes their makeup artist. The girls makeup, and occasionally he will do drag makeup on the guys if they ask. Sometimes the Drag viewing parties start by Bakugo doing everyones makeup and then ordering Pizza.

Mina Ashido

Mina fucking loves to dance and everybody knows that, so it’s no surprise that she manages to nail every damn Kpop she does. She really loves the variety of dances and she can match every vibe. A dance in heels? Shes got it. Hip hop? Oh hell yeah. Cute? Sure! Badass? Shes got this. She is really just a bop.

Danganronpa was an EXPERIENCE for her. She absolutely adored the cases that needed to be solved, cried at the characters, and adored the game. She totally cosplayed Tsumugi with Cospox once or twice with Denki just for giggles sake.

Totally was heads over heels for Ouran Highschool Host club. She thought the anime was so damn precious (She adores Hikaru) and was so sad that there hasn’t been a 2nd season, so she bought all of the manga.

Momo Yaoyorozu

She is a Kpop fan! She totally could be an idol since she can sing pretty well, has the face for it, can dance pretty well! Her favorite thing is rapping though. You can’t say that Momo wouldn’t be able to write some bad bitch raps and pull them off with ease. With her, Mina, Jirou, and Ochaco, they make one HELL of a Girl Group. They love to do covers of Blackpink, Red Velvet, CherryBullet, ITZY, and Mamamoo covers. Her biases have to be Jennie, Irene and Moonbyul.

Tamaki Amajiki

Flipped through homestuck when it started, really never got into it but admired the work people put into their cosplays. Knows basic character names and that buckets should be feared.

He actually used to really like My little Pony! He would NEVER call himself a brony, but he really enjoyed the show. He only watched a couple of seasons, but the show itself was pretty relaxing and managed to calm him down when he was feeling anxious. If anybody ever knew he had a my little pony phase though (And still actually will watch it from time to time) he might just die from embarrassment.

Want to play Legend of Zelda? Well Tamaki is your guy to talk to about it. He might start rambling and will completely forget about his anxiety for a moment before realizing how nerdy he sounds. He has a gamecube in his dorm to play Twilight princess and Ocarina of time, He has a Wii for Skyward sword, and god did this kid lock himself in his room when breath of the wild came out. He can speedrun it like none other (Seriously, if he let’s you watch him, you will be fucking surprised by how amazing he is.)

Gotta throw in Teen Titans. Seeing Beast boy use his power in so many badass ways gave him some pretty cool ideas for his own quirk.

Oh and Rupauls Drag race. Nobody would expect him to be a fan of drag race, but he actually does enjoy watching the goofy drama. If you’re dating, you better expect weekly Drag race with him. It’s pretty funny to watch him enjoy the show. Sometimes he gasps, laughs or bites his lip, eyes hooked to the screen.

Shoto Todoroki

Another motherfucker who could EASILY be an Idol if he wanted to be. He actually really enjoys Kpop after Momo introduced it to him. They both often bop to it together when they study or hang out. He is also most likely to be the one recording the dancing videos or editing them too since he really enjoys helping out the girls. 

Want to watch him nerd out? Watch the classic Godzilla movies with him. Like HOLY SHIT does this man love the 50s-70s Godzilla movies. Bring him a box set and he will rather hug you really tight or run to grab blankets from his room cause this dude ADORES these movies. (Especially the mothra one. Like he will cling to you, thank you over and over again, and watch them with almost childlike glee.)

This bitch bops with Rupauls Drag race. He really enjoys makeup and has debated on trying drag himself (Not that anybody would know that) but it’s kind of shocking to see that he is the one that started the Weekly Rupauls Drag Race viewing in the UA Dorms. 

Yugi Aoyama

His mother used to read Harry Potter to him to help him sleep when he was a child so he naturally knows a lot about it. He knows he is a Slytherin and when Izuku thought about it, it made sense. He is pretty arrogant and wants to impress with his upbringing and french lineage. He also makes it pretty hard to get to know him personally, so Izuku makes a note that he is a Slytherin.

Likes Kpop, but isn’t SUPER into it like Denki or Mina. He likes listening to BTS and Exo and his Biases are Seokjin and Chanyeol.