#/I thought about putting in a Mitski song of course- but decided on this one

[meadowlarksabove]

(pretend i'm on six's blog tee hee)

A song that reminds me of your muse! (Open)

[cosmicdahlias]

Please Don’t Say You Love Me

a stan x reader fic

MINORS DNI

You think it’s another day working with your boyfriend, Ford Pines. When you show up at his door it’s not him who answers it, but his brother. He tells you Ford has been sucked through the portal. You both agree to do everything you can to bring him home. After a month of long, hard work you two decide to treat yourselves with a bottle of whiskey and one thing leads to another.

warnings: ANGST, cheating, drunk sex

raaaaaaah finally wrote my first stan fic!!! i couldn’t help myself and turned it into an angsty mess. idk something about him makes me want to just put him in the most heart wrenching scenarios. the title for this one is based off of a line from one of my favorite mitski songs

You pulled your car up to the snow covered cabin. You were looking forward to another day of working with your boyfriend and research partner, especially since he had decided to dismantle the portal and put Bill behind him. You never let on, but Bill scared you, the way he used the love of your life like a puppet.

You approached the door and gave it a knock, as it opened you started removing your coat, not looking at the man in the doorway.

“Hey, honey. You know, I’m so glad you decided to finally put this portal and Bill stuff in the past. I was really starting to-“

You looked up and froze. The man before you wasn’t Ford. He looked just like him, save for his rough appearance and mullet, but he wasn’t your Ford.

You jumped back. “WHO ARE YOU? WHERE’S FORD?”

“Whoa whoa whoa, who are YOU?” He spoke in a gruff voice.

“I happen to be his partner.”

An unmistakable look of guilt spread across his face. “Oh… come in, we have a lot to talk about.”

-

“So, he’s gone?” You said, choking back tears.

The man had explained everything that had transpired, that he was his twin brother, the fight, Ford being sucked into the portal.

He looked at the floor, afraid to look at you. “Yeah.“

He shifted his gaze to you, a sudden look of hope in his eyes. “But hey, maybe it’s a good thing you’re here! You can help fix it, bring him back!”

You didn’t give it a second thought. “Y- yes of course!”

You both descended the staircase to the portal. It didn’t take a long look to know it was critically damaged. You walked closer to it, placing your hand on the cold metal.

“I don’t know Stanley, the damage is pretty severe.”

���You can fix it, right?”

You sighed. “Yes, but it’ll take time.”

“Well then what are we waiting for? Let’s get started.”

You knew you had a long road ahead of you, but you would do anything to get Ford back.

-

A month had passed with you two working diligently on the portal. Tonight you decided to reward yourselves for your hard work with several drinks. A snow storm raged outside as you both sat on the couch in Ford’s room, sufficiently intoxicated. You two shared life stories and jokes, laughing. There was a lull in the conversation, he watched you as you took another sip of your drink. He tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, then he blurted it out.

“I was thinking, it’s pretty obvious we both like each other, so… what if we made it official?”

You turned to him. “Stanley, no. I- we can’t.“

“Why not? Look, from the moment I met you I felt something. The more I got to know you the harder I fell for you, and I know you feel the same way. I know I’m not Ford, but I promise I’ll treat you right.”

“And what if he comes back? What then?”

He took your hand in his. “We don’t have to think about that right now, like you said, it could be years before the portal’s working again. All I know is I lov-“

“Don’t- don’t you dare. Don’t say you love me.”

Tears started to fall, he held your cheek in his hand and wiped them away with his thumb.

He pressed his forehead to yours. “You don’t have to love me, but… just stay with me, please.”

His eyes looked directly into yours and you swore you saw a glimpse of Ford in them. He pulled back, looking away.

“My whole life I’ve been nothing. I’m not anyone’s first choice, nobody ever chooses me. Everything I ever do goes wrong, but when I’m with you it all feels okay- you make me feel okay. I know I’m just a screwup but-”

Tears welled in his eyes, you put a hand on his lap.

“You’re not a screwup to me, Stanley.”

He looked into your eyes again, cupped your cheek and kissed you deeply. You didn’t stop him.

He pulled away. “Fuck, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-“

You kissed him back. “No, it’s okay.”

That was all he needed to hear. He pulled you onto his lap and started kissing you aggressively, the taste of whiskey on his breath. His hands traveled up and down your body, you laced your fingers in his shaggy locks. You began grinding yourself against him, he bucked his hips.

“Are you sure you want this- want me?” He said breathlessly between kisses.

You nodded.

He started to remove your top while kissing your neck, following with your bra. He looked at your chest longingly.

“God, your tits are incredible.”

You stifled a giggle, he was so much more crass than his brother, Ford always referred to them as “breasts”. He took your nipple in his mouth, nibbling it with his teeth, you moaned. He pulled your pants off, letting them drop to the floor. He looked down at your panties and gave a gravelly laugh.

“Damn, matching underwear? It’s almost like you planned this or something. Is that why you got me drunk?” He said with a cocky smirk.

He hooked his thumbs under your waistband and slid them down your legs. He couldn’t resist slipping a finger between your thighs.

“Fuck, you’re so wet. You really want me that bad, huh?”

You moved your fingers to the hem of his t-shirt.

“Can I?” You asked.

“Babydoll, you can do anything to me.”

You pulled his shirt off of him and looked down at his torso, he was chubby and you liked it. You sank to the floor and started removing his pants, unzipping them with your teeth. He laughed again.

“Jesus, I didn’t know you nerds could get freaky like that.”

“I think you’ll find I have many surprises, Stanley.”

You pulled off his boxers, revealing his cock. The length was impressive, the girth intimidating. It was almost identical to Ford’s, but Stanley’s was far thicker.

You moved yourself back on top of him and slowly lowered yourself onto the length of his shaft, taking him inside you, your pussy struggling to accommodate his massive girth, he throbbed hard.

“God- fuck, you’re crazy tight. No one’s ever squeezed my dick like this before.”

“And I’ve never been with someone with a cock as thick as yours.”

“Yeah? How’s it feel?”

“Incredible, but it kinda hurts.”

“Here, I think I know something that’ll help.”

He slipped a hand down between your thighs and rubbed your clit, you moaned into his neck.

“Better?”

“Infinitely.”

You moved your hips at a steady rhythm, letting his cock fully slide in and out of you.

The words started to spill out of him. “Nngh- ever since I met you you’re all I think about, I wanted you so bad. I- I would watch you whenever you worked on the portal. God, you looked so cute when you were really- ah, fuck- focused on something, the way you’d tie your hair up so it doesn’t get in the way. It’s so bad, but I would jerk off just thinking about you.”

“I’ve thought about you too, I tried to push it down, but tonight I secretly hoped a few drinks would lead to something.”

You picked up your pace, he let out groan, working your clit harder. You started to pulse around his cock.

“Mmm, close already? That’s it, cum on me.”

“Nngh, Stanley.”

Your orgasm steadily built until you couldn’t take it anymore and it felt like a tightly wound coil snapped within you. As you came you threw your head back with a moan, tightening around him.

“Holy shit, sweetheart. I thought you were tight before.”

You were so high off your orgasm that you said it without thinking. “You feel so good, daddy.”

He blushed hard and throbbed inside you.

“Fuck, that’s so hot, no one’s ever called me that before.”

He gripped your hips and thrusted up into you.

“I’m gonna fucking cum. Where do you want it, babygirl?”

“Mmf- inside me.”

“God, you’re so perfect. No one ever lets me do that.”

He tightened his hold on your hips, panting and digging his nails into your soft flesh.

“Fuck, I’m so close. You feel so fucking good.”

He pumped hard and fast, his breathing increased. He tilted his head back and moaned loudly, cumming deep inside you, burying his face into the crook of your neck.

“Oh god, y/n!”

He wrapped his arms tightly around you, not wanting to ever let you go. He wished this could last forever, just him and you.

“I love you y/n, so mu-“

You silenced him with a kiss, you couldn’t hear it, not again. You loved him too, you truly did, but you couldn’t tell him, you didn’t want to give him false hope.

He pulled out and you both laid down on the couch, he held you in his arms, spooning you. His breathing began to relax, turning to gentle snores. You slowly wriggled out of his arms, dressed yourself and crept out of the cabin, knowing you could never see him again. You sobbed the whole drive home.

When morning came he would sleepily reach out to pull you closer, only to find that you had gone. He tried calling you repeatedly, but you couldn’t bring yourself to answer. In the following days you would pack up all of your belongings and leave the town of Gravity Falls for good, never to return. You knew you were leaving Stanley solely responsible for fixing the portal, dooming Ford for god knows how long, maybe forever. You knew full well you couldn’t face him, not after what you’d done.

The guilt ate you alive every day for the rest of your life.

[remembrancer-of-heresy]

Replica (Part 5/Finale)

Summary: You finally accept his love.

Perturabo/fem!Reader

Warnings: incest (kinda), possessive behavior, manipulation, smut, dubious consent.

Word Count: 2426

It was an interesting experience. It's very sad to say goodbye to this story. But there will be others. You know, I thought that my beloved traitor-primarch Konrad Curze. But judging by the way I described these two, probably my favorite is Bo.

Song: Mitski - Washing Machine Heart (I can't even describe how perfect this song is for this story)

You didn't know how much time had passed. A couple of minutes or several hours until your quiet tears turned into sobs. The Iron Lord, who had been lying next to you all this time, looked at you with displeasure. He expected you to either fall asleep or be happily drawn to him after such closeness. But the primarch’s face quickly smooths out after you speak.

"It's hurt".

He carefully examines you from head to toe. A semblance of fear flashes in the eyes. Perturabo quickly gets up and lifts you from the bed as light and gentle as a feather. All you can do is press yourself against his massive chest. Blood is still seeping from between your legs. You almost don't feel them. While belly and bones are almost burning with pain. You wanted to tear off the lower part of yourself and throw it away just to stop experiencing these torments. Your body doesn’t listen and all you can do is close your eyes and fall asleep. Hoping that you'll never wake up.

But the Iron Lord decided otherwise.

From now on you live in the primarch's chambers. According to the man, he needed to monitor your condition, and now there is no point in you living separately. You thought he would call an apothecary or a mortal physician but Perturabo was quite knowledgeable about how to treat you. He gave you the best medicine. He fed his own blood so that the wounds would heal faster. You couldn’t help but think that it tasted exactly the same as your rations.

You could already feel your bones and your hips hardly hurt. The bruises were almost gone, which greatly pleased the primarch, who could not deny himself the pleasure of touching the exposed areas of your skin with his fingertips. A lot of time passed, but the man was in no hurry to make love to you again.

The primarch was too keen on the idea of ​​trampling his main enemy into the mud and spending almost all his free time at work. But you, seeing his gaze, felt how much he longed to enter inside you again. But Perturabo waited, savoring the anticipation of the desired victory. You were supposed to be a reward for his efforts and pains, which no one appreciated.

And if the body gradually developed, the spirit was broken. There was no way you could get his behavior out of your head. How he took you. Appropriated you as his lover. He loved you. But along with this... someone else.

You've never heard this name. Didn't know who this girl was. But one could guess that it was someone important to the primarch. So important that at the moment of closeness he remembered someone else. And the worst thing was that at the same time he called you his... sister. That guess alone made you feel sick, and you desperately hoped you were wrong.

It's no wonder that you soon became withdrawn into yourself. Perturabo did not notice the quiet depression, focusing on your physical state. And of course, in his main goal in life. Creation of the Eternal Fortress. The greatest masterpiece that could break the body and spirit of his sworn brother Dorn.

You lay on his massive bed, putting down the book about architecture that you were reading with interest. But when the primarch speaks, all your attention must be focused on him and only him. No excuses. Perturabo enthusiastically told you how his Legion and slaves were completing the final work on Sebastus IV. Soon the fortress will be ready and the noble Rogal Dorn will fall into a trap. The Imperial Fist will lead his legion to destruction and will finally be humiliated.

“Who is Calliphone?”

You couldn't stand it. No, you couldn't do this anymore. You never asked questions, never contradicted him, and obeyed him in everything. Even when Perturabo lay in bed with you, you didn’t resist, although you were scared.

Silence reigned in the room. Perturabo sat at the table with an unreadable expression on his face. For a second you thought he was going to explode in rage. But he remained frighteningly calm. Moving the drawings aside, the men approached the bed on which you were lying, wrapped in a blanket. Sitting down on the very edge, the man carefully began stroking your knee.

“I see that human memory is failing you. The flaw of your kind, but how can I be angry with you.” - the primarch looks straight into your eyes with a grin. - "It's you. My adopted sister from Olympia.”

You feel a lump forming in your throat. Sister. He called you his sister when... when... You shudder and pull your legs up to your chest. Disgust and denial overwhelmed with renewed vigor. You wanted to hide under the blanket like a little child. You're almost babbling.

"It's not me"

“No, it’s you, my dear sister. Daughter of a tyrant, maiden of Olympia... Forgive me.” - the man, clearly not understanding the whole gamut of emotions, speaks the cherished words almost with a breath. With difficulty and with relief. Completely opening the soul that was closed from everyone. Giving his hearts to you alone. - “Please... forgive me. How could I think that you are nothing to me? You are the only one who has loved me all these years. Not one of my brother primarchs is worthy to spend even a second with you. Especially him.”

Bo moves closer and softly whispers your real name. Almost purring with pleasure, inhaling the smell of your own hair. You look at him in disbelief. Weren't you his sister a few seconds ago? Why did he suddenly remember your real identity now? The man carefully twirled your curl in his hands.

“The False Emperor always preferred Rogal to me. He wore his mark, built him a Palace... and he had you. He dared to hide you from me. To pick you up while a decrepit old woman lived at Olympia. Daring to be insolent to me. A pathetic replica, incomparable to the original. Frankly, now the memory of how I broke her neck brings only pleasure.” - all the primarch’s envy and irritation immediately disappear when he meets your gaze. The man takes your face in his giant hands, smoothing your cheeks with his thumbs. - “I will make them all regret it. They will all suffer. For you. And now I want you to sing.”

Perturabo climbs onto the bed and for a second you think he'll rip your clothes off again. But instead, the man slowly lifts your dress to your knees. You see his steely eyes mist and his mouth moves closer to your lower lips. Oh. You want to pull away, but the man squeezes your thighs forcefully, leaving new bruises that only recently disappeared from your body.

You feel his tongue slowly running along your insides. These were not passionate and uncontrollable caresses, but cold calculations. He knew exactly how he wanted to touch you, how to make you squirm. The primarch kissed you as if he was planning another attack. Measuring every movement, stoically and impartially. As if it wasn’t your moans that caused the pain in his crotch.

If only your soul were as submissive as your body. All this time he saw her. All this time he spoke to her. And in those moments when you were different from Calliphone, Perturabo saw you. And he accepted. Because you are not made of iron, you bend, you curve as it suits him. Melting under his gaze, not challenging him. You are a twisted memory of years gone by. A living replica, an imperfect but improved version. And you can't wonder. Is he kissing her now or you?

But your thoughts are lost as soon as Perturabo accelerates. A shiver runs through your body, you moan loudly, feeling your body relax after a minute of tension. And again you feel the heat, feeling how someone else’s tongue greedily collects your juices, not wanting to leave even a drop. You feel bad, scared and sad. But at the same time it’s so good.

Didn't he promise to take care of you and cherish you? This is exactly what he is doing now. You just need to let go. You no longer wanted to tremble and cry from horror or sadness. You wanted everything to be as before. So that he can show you his wonderful inventions again. So that you can talk again about the books you read, drink wine and eat fruits with him. You wanted to see a smile bloom on his gloomy face and if you are the reason for this. Then why are you still resisting? It doesn't matter who you are. He loves you. And you him?

The man, having finally had his fill and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, hovers over you. With one hand leaning on the bed, the other grabbed your waist possessively. Perturabo carefully, almost analytically, watches your tired but pleased expression on your face. The corners of the lips tremble, ready to stretch into a smile of pride.

“I have dreamed for so long that we would become truly close. But I couldn’t even think that it would be so.” - almost growling, he touches your lips with his, tongue penetrating inside. There was little tenderness. Perturabo wanted to subjugate you, appropriate you, brand you so that everyone would know who you belong to. And you…

You kissed back.

***

This place was wonderful. Your little personal paradise. Where you can be safe and no one will ever hurt you. Bo took care of it. He himself recreated your chambers in his native Olympic style. Massive columns supported a gigantic ceiling, and the snow-white walls were decorated with golden birds. Your chambers were exactly like the golden cage you saw on the first day you met Perturabo.

He often visited you after he took care of business. The rest of the time you were devoted only to yourself. Alas, the servants could not entertain your pastime. The Iron Lord took care to rip out their tongues and eyes. Slaves should not offend your ears with their voices. Should not look at the property of the daemon-prince.

You stood on the balcony, leaning on the railing. The Fortress of Hate had the best view of Medrengard. Absolutely black buildings were buried in smoke and fire from constantly working machines. Neither the smell nor the heat could touch you. Perturabo has ensured that your chambers are well protected from the stifling surface temperatures.

You could see the Iron Warriors arriving from the Imperial world with a new regiment of slaves. Frequent guests, the Dark Mechanicum, were already leaving the residence with a very satisfied look. It appears that the meeting with the primarch ended satisfactorily for both parties.

There is no limit to the genius of the Iron Lord. Only he could create such a truly terrifying fortress world. The Imperial fists were not one iota able to create such perfection. Remembering your young years on one of Rogal Dorn’s controlled worlds, you could only marvel at your naivety.

No, you were from Olympia.

You hear the massive door of the chambers open and a menacing voice orders the slaves to leave the chambers. You almost choke on air and with incredible difficulty restrain the desire to joyfully run out to meet the primarch. But until the servants leave, you must save face.

But how happy it was to see Bo again. He has come to you! You can see him again, hear him. Feel the touch on your body. As a sister, as a lover, but you are not his sister either. To feel with every fiber of the soul his demonic presence, his divine greatness. Only when the door closed behind the last servant did you exhale. It turns out you weren't breathing all this time.

A mutated hand, blessed by chaos, rests on your shoulder. Claws gently touch your delicate skin. The blood of a primarch with rejuvenation drugs did not allow you to fade away. Bo said that you, like him, cannot grow old, cannot die. No, not just can't. Should not.

“Another world of the Corpse on the Throne has fallen. Soon the galaxy will be cleansed and you will never feel in danger.” - the mechanical rumbling voice hardly turns to a whisper. - “I remember you saying that you could become a remembrancer of Dorn. How long ago it was. But you became mine. Always was."

Oh, yes, you were his former captive from your homeworld Rudah. You will always be. You've never seen Olympia. It was Perturabo who told you about the wonders of his home world, and you fell in love with his culture. Exactly. How could you forget? Bo himself didn’t remember who you were.

He says your name. It sounded like a cacophony of sounds the most beautiful melody. You turn around and look at him adoringly. He's so handsome. Black flesh with red veins fused with iron. The once human face resembles the symbol of the Iron Warriors.

Perturabo was with you again. You will drink wine, he will talk about his grandiose plans, and then you will either go to the baths or end up in bed. Or maybe all at once. You hug the primarch tightly around his wide waist, unable to clasp your hands.

“Bo, I love you so much.”

The daemon-prince rumbles with pleasure as he allows the frail mortal girl to touch him. The claw gently lifts your chin, forcing you to look straight into the black eyes of the primarch. Perturabo kneels down to be at eye level with you.

“As always, you can’t contain your emotions, dear sister.” - the man pulls your small seductive figure closer to him. Even in his world, in his tower, he strives to hide you from everyone. The iron mask opens slightly and a long black tongue touches your neck. The skin hisses with the primarch's saliva. - “But enough words. It's time to get down to business."

You just smile happily, holding back so as not to moan at the top of your lungs. The personality is bursting at the seams, sticking together again like plasticine, as soon as Bo tells who he sees you. Whom does he desire right now or in the future.

And you will be anything for him.

[possum-quesadilla]

Part 2 of LoopJuice is here! Chapter one of Time’s Arrow is out now. Please read the warnings and tread with caution! And sorry in advance. I got a little too poetic with this one. (The Post Mortem has been pushed back until after or midway through Time’s Arrow is completed, since it’ll touch on a lot of things that haven’t yet been fully expanded upon.)

As always, here are some extras! Also a bit of outright explanation, since I know this chapter might be a bit hard.

Chapter One:

- The lyrics for this chapter’s title are from “Goodbye, My Danish Sweetheart” by Mitski! The song itself fits more with Time is a Flat Circle (andoneofthelastchaptersofthisfic), but the selected line specifically is meant to refer how to Beetlejuice is unknowingly reflecting on his deep yearning to be seen and heard and understood, and how it impacted his relationships and his self worth.

- “And Beetlejuice was in the deepest, dreamiest slumber of his unlife.” - This is referencing one of the most haunting scenes from “Asteroid City”. It’s meant to hint at the revelation Beetlejuice has in this chapter, which is similar to “you can’t wake up if you don’t fall asleep.”

- “Ty takoy malen’kiy! Gde tvoi roditeli?” - Suprise! The old lady was Russian. Beetlejuice’s mother dumped him somewhere in Russia. Sorry for the Google Translate use, but she says “You are so small! Where are your parents?” She was very concerned about how scrawny and cold he was. As she should’ve been.

- “A strange, scruffy little creature was clung to his back, licking the side of his face and rubbing it’s soft nose against his neck.” - Rabies is doing something called “slubbing”, which is how opossums show affection!

- “Maybe I think you’ll need to replace me. How? No one else was like her. No one else was like him. Maybe I think you’ll need to try. I’m not coming back, Beetlejuice.” - Another “Asteroid City” quote. (Sorry, I cannot stop… that scene makes me tear up everytime I watch it.) Rabies isn’t actually speaking to them, obviously, it is just their hazy, grief-stricken mind imagining it. Telling them what they thought they needed to hear.

- “She clings to their back as they ride an old sled down the house’s stairs.” - Lydia made Beetlejuice watch “Home Alone” at some point during their time stuck in the loop. It gave them the idea to ride a sled down the stairs, like Kevin did in the film. It did not go well.

- “ “It can’t rain all the time.” She is near. The scent of formaldehyde is at the edge of their senses. She’s put their favorite movie on. How thoughtful. How sweet.” - Lydia watched “The Crow” while sitting with Beetlejuice in hopes that the sounds of their favorite movie would maybe convince them to wake up. Also, because she missed them, and that movie makes her think of them.

- Annabell Lee - Of course, Lydia is reading out Edgar Allen Poe’s “Annabell Lee” to Beetlejuice as they sleep. It was one of her mother’s favorites, and she holds it very near and dear to her heart. So she decided to share it with Beetlejuice, to show that she cares.

- “Sometimes, sometimes they still think they still hear her, still feel the luminance of her smile.” - SORRY ANOTHER ASTEROID CITY REFERENCE. That Wes Anderson-esque awkward dialogue has a death grip on my brain. Also, the scene it is from is thematically relevant.

- “Silly Goose.” - Deb calls Beetlejuice “Goose”, since she often mispronounced “Betelgeuse” as “Bet-El-Goose”. And she likes to call him a silly goose.

- “ “What do you want, Goose?” They suppose they want what everyone wants. Power, a partner. Kids, someday, maybe.” - The phrasing and response is a reference to “The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals”. (Also perhaps children will come up again later? Who knows! ;) )

- “ “It was fun while it lasted.” She was the sun, chasing away his shadows and bathing him with her overwhelming, scorching radiance. She was fire, singeing his hair as he warmed himself with her glow. She was light. He shone only with the light she cast. She was everything.” - This part has two huge inspirations. First, “The Moon Will Sing” by The Crane Wives. Specifically, how the singer loved someone “like the sun”, and how they “Bore the shadows that you made, With no light of my own”. This song greatly embodies Deb and Beej’s relationship, and how it was very one-sided and draining for him. He basked in the limited attention and affection she showed, and allowed his own needs and wants to be pushed aside in favor of Deb’s. Secondly, that one scene from “Adventure Time: Fionna and Cake”. The exchange “You were a wonderful experience.” “You were everything.” literally brings me to my knees. I wanted to try to evoke similar emotions with Beetlejuice’s thoughts, but I know it doesn’t even come close to the original, lol.

- “He’s cold again. He feels a shiver wrack his body, a highborn wind chilling-” - A “highborn wind” is a reference to “Annabell Lee”! The poetry continues to rub off on Beej.

- “How could you?” “How couldn’t I?” - Yep, you guessed it. Another “Asteroid City” reference. Like the original scene, it’s an exchange between an abuser and the spouse he abused.

- Yes, Beetlejuice murdered his husband. Not on his own, and it wasn’t his plan, but he straight up led that fool to his death. There will be more on that later.

- “He is cruel. He is gentle. He makes him laugh.” … “(It was so easy, so salty and gross - )” - These are both references to lines from songs that I listened to when writing Beej and Cyrus’ interactions. The first is “Cop Car” by Mitski, and the second is “Gross” by Penelope Scott. The former really embodies parts of this chapter as a whole, and the latter is literally perfect for BJ and Cyrus’ relationship.

- “Like all the tales and tragedies. He is Ariadne, he is Medea, he is Loki, he is the Crescent Moon, he is Grettir, he is - ” - Beetlejuice retreated into literature, for a time. (Now he’s mostly illiterate.) He, like everyone, felt a kinship with a lot of the characters he read about. Ariadne is the woman who helped Theseus kill the Minotaur, but he abandoned her on an island. Medea was the wife of Jason, and helped him achieve all of his great accomplishments, but he betrayed their marriage. (And she killed their children in retaliation.) Loki was often the scapegoat of the Asgardians, cleaning up after their messes and sometimes taking blame he didn’t deserve. The Crescent Moon was torn in half by a witch, and kept slowly dying despite the Sun Maiden’s best efforts to keep him alive. Grettir’s tale is insane. My special interest used to be mythology, especially Norse and Greek! Go look more into these tales, they are all so intriguing. Overly Sarcastic Productions does a great job summarizing a few of them!

- “He was the sacrificial lamb raised to slaughter, the scapegoat fed milk and honey and led away into the woods.” - Now you can see why, thematically, Beetlejuice’s features are specifically from a sheep!

- “Orpheus’ voice calls to him. (Or was it Eurydice?)” - Sorry not sorry, more Greek mythology! Beetlejuice is unsure if Adam and Barbara are leading him to the light, or if he is the one dooming them to the underworld.

- “Five humans, two dead and three living, huddled together. They are happy. They are home. What need do they have for the demon exiting stage left? (Well, no, not stage left. More to the center.)” - Obviously, this is a reference to the last song of the musical, and the way Beetlejuice leaves. And just a smidgeon of 4th wall breaking from Beej!

- “… we need to talk. About.. him.” - I won’t elaborate, I just wanted to draw attention to this line! :)

- “He doesn’t fit into the couple. He doesn’t fit into the family at all, into their home. He is a mismatched piece of a puzzle that never existed, he is something wrong. Something that doesn’t fit anywhere.” - This is a phenomenon I’ve heard a lot of autistic and/or queer people talk about experiencing. The feeling that something is just wrong, that you are wrong, that you don’t fit in anywhere. You want to be seen, but you’re scared of what they’ll see.

- “He is an intruder in the Garden.” - The ‘Garden’ is meant to be a reference to the Garden of Eden. Beetlejuice feels like he doesn’t deserve what he sees as a perfect paradise.

- “Oh, wait until you see the daisies. They’re beautiful.” - Barbara is still taking great care of the garden.

- “He is a vile cloud of poisonous miasma. He is a foul, mangy hound. He is a monstrous serpent. He contaminates the air and wilts the flowers with his presence alone.” - More dog imagery, and a direct reference to him feeling like the Serpent. Y’know, THE Serpent. The one that tempted humanity and ruined Eden. THE DEVIL from THE BIBLE.

- “Soft petals and sharp thorns. Purple and yellow and green and orange and red. Love and warmth and comfort.” - Each of the colors represent one of the Deetz-Maitlands family members!

- “I will ruin you. I know that you mean so well- ” - The Crane Wives, my beloved. This is from another Beetlejuice-coded song, “Tongues & Teeth” by The Crane Wives.

- “The rot spreads. He desperately tries to stop it with bloodied claws- The blood is everywhere. It flows from his ear, his wrist, his side- The wound on the back of his head, the metal in his chest, it bubbles up in his lungs and flows from his mouth. Sulfur and iron chokes out the magnificent aroma of the Garden.” - Beetlejuice feels like his trauma has tainted him. Like it will ruin the Deetz-Maitlands if he gets too close to them, if he shows them all of him, the ‘bad’ included.

- “No pestilence had ever been so fatal, or so hideous. Blood was its Avator and its seal - the redness and the horror of blood.” Lydia is reading “The Masque of Red Death” by Edgar Allen Poe at an inopportune time.

- “ “The mind is its own place, and in itself Can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven.” Her voice is so faint now, yet still she reads. What is it now? Must be new. He’s never heard that one before.” - Lydia is reading “Paradise Lost”! Wow, great thematic timing, Lyds!

- “She’d never shown him warmth, or care, or love- nothing a mother ought to do. Just hatred. Just cold.” - I swear, this wasn’t meant to be a Warriors reference. It was just meant to connect to the theme of warmth, I SWEAR

- “But rain is washing the blood away. The smoke clears. The flowers are still there. They still call to him.” - Another The Crane Wives reference, this time low key. “Curses” by The Crane Wives is INSANELY Beetlejuice-coded.

- “Colors cascaded through it. Forest, violet, indigo, sanguine, ivory, slate.” - Obviously, this is visually referencing his mood-ring hair!

- “There were myths about him. Stories, cautionary tales, urban legends. He made breathers tremble in their villages and beds and skyscrapers.” - Yet another Mike Flanagan reference. “Doctor Sleep”, you will always be famous to me…

- “Now are thoughts thou shalt not banish, Now are visions ne’er to vanish; From thy spirit shall they pass, No more - like dew-drop from the grass.” - Some more great thematic timing from Lydia! She is reading “Spirits of the Dead” by Edgar Allen Poe.

- “He didn’t mind being torn apart by the hounds if it meant he got that glorious peek into joy.” - Some more Greek mythology… this time he’s referring to Actaeon, the man who was ripped apart by his own hounds after Artemis turned him into a stag. His crime? Peeping (on accident in some tellings but intentionally in others) on her while she bathed. Beetlejuice still, on some level, sees himself as a vile voyeur of the Deetz-Maitlands happy-ever-after.

- “He would take any sort of treatment if it meant they wouldn’t prematurely leave him alone again. He would trim his claws, pull his teeth, cut his horns-” - Yikes, still got that “beat me, just don’t leave me” mindset.

- “A cat is laid on his chest, it’s paws tucked under itself. It’s fur is black and long, blurring into the darkness as Beetlejuice’s eyes struggle to adjust. One golden eye glows at him, wide and curious.” - Say hello to Pluto! I have yet to see any fanfics that bring up the cat Delia talked about adopting, so I decided to do my own take on them! She is named after a cat in “The Black Cat” by Edgar Allen Poe. (Gasp! Is Delia a Poe fan?) She did not lose her eye to a crazy guy like in the original story, she lost it due to an infection.

- “It steps closer, causing the demon to let out a grunt as one paw is planted firmly on his left pec. Ow.” - This is based on my own beloved black cat always somehow managing to step right on a boob. Every time.

- “With a third trill, the cat steps closer, settling down on the side of the demon’s neck. It rubs it’s cheek against the side of his head.” … “It even gripped at his face with a paw when he tried to lean away.” - this is something that my other cat loves to do. It is sweet, but ouch. My jugular.

- “Trash mammals” is, once again, a “Night in the Woods” reference!

- “But now, this lithe little scraggly black cat was licking his face with it’s coarse tongue, doing it’s damndest to groom his scruff.” - Some cats love facial hair! No idea why, but people with beards are usually a cat’s favorite in their families.

- “His mouth hurt so bad, and a brief curious search with his tongue revealed he was missing two teeth - a canine and an incisor. They would grow back, but damn.” - He bit Juno so hard that he lost two of his teeth!

- “Beetlejuice let out a ‘HWAUGH’ noise…” Please imagine it sounds like this.

Confused about the metaphors and symbolism? Worry not, I will do my best to explain!

- Warmth - warmth is a running theme throughout LoopJuice as a whole. As Beetlejuice says, his mother had “.. never shown him warmth, or care, or love- nothing a mother ought to do. Just hatred. Just cold.” Unlike other demons, Beetlejuice’s extremities are cold, and he doesn’t feel the full benefits of the hellfire within him. (Thanks a lot, dad.) He is both always physically cold and emotionally starved of care and warm gestures. He is always desperately searching for that missing warmth. He finds it in Deb, but it is not real warmth; she is a wildfire, burning him up and leaving nothing behind. Rigel was cruel to him and never cared for him. Cyrus was cold in a way that made it feel like warmth, like the last stages of hypothermia. (There will be more on him in later chapters, so I will not give too much away here.) Beetlejuice finally finds real, genuine care in Lydia and The Maitlands, and later Delia and Charles.

- Rot - Beetlejuice feels like he is tainted, ruined by the things that happened to him. By who he is. He is his mother’s child, and she’s horrible. Bad things happened to him, and he is worried that the echoing pain will reach others. Juno’s words really got to him - he believes he was born broken and wrong. But he wasn’t, of course! His trauma and pain do not define him. Who his mother is doesn’t define him either. That’s when he sees that it was never rot, it was just moss. It was just him, all of him. The good, the bad, the hurt. He decides whether it is actually going to cause harm, he has to help it flourish and be good.

- Animals - Beej does not see himself as a person. No, not a human, a person. Someone with morals and thoughts and feelings. He often compares himself to animals, because that is the closest he can currently get to describing how he feels.

- Flowers - compared to the lifespan of a demon, the lives of humans are short. To Beetlejuice, humanity is beautiful like a rose; it is pretty partially because it is fleeting, impermanent. Flowers are beautiful because they die. At first, he felt the same way about humans. But now that he has gotten so close to a few of them, he sees more than that. “Soft petals, sharp thorns.” A “magnificent aroma”.

(Here is a picture of my darling son, as a thank you for reading this far. His name is Pumpkin!)

[kpostedsum]

why not me? ; F.W

fred weasley x reader, fred x angelina

summary: you see the way fred looks at angelina

song: washing machine heart - mitski

a/n: a quick thing i wrote at 2am, not angelina slander!! also unedited nd not proofread bc yolo, y/n pov i fink..

masterlist | taglist

Toss your dirty shoes in my washing machine heart

Baby, bang it up inside

you weren’t stupid, you saw the way your boyfriend stared at her you couldn’t blame him though, she was everything. The way her dark skin glowed in the sunlight, how she’d often have a new hairstyle every few weeks; whether it was braids, locs, or even her natural hair, she was effortless pretty.

I'm not wearing my usual lipstick

I thought maybe we would kiss tonight

the gryffindors had won their quidditch game today against the ravenclaws so of course, you had to be there to celebrate your boyfriends win. you decided to dress up a bit more today in hopes of catching fred’s attention.

putting on a nice dress and doing your makeup a bit differently you’re sure you’ll catch fred’s attention tonight.

“there she is!” you heard george yell over the music from the other side of the common room, you quickly saunter over to him and embrace him in a hug.

“hi george, congrats on the win tonight” you smile. “do you happen to know where fred is, i haven’t seen him yet?” you say while scanning the common room looking for the other red headed twin who you adore so much.

“your best chance to find him is with angelina, wherever she is he is” he gives you a sad smile and walks away.

it was stupid if you to think you could dress up and all of a sudden fred would pay attention to you, it’s been going on for a while. Whether it was him staying extra late at quidditch practice to go over stuff with angelina, studying divination with her or just hanging out.

wherever she was his eyes were on her, he used to look at you like that.

but not anymore.

Baby will you kiss me already and

Toss your dirty shoes in my washing machine heart

Baby, bang it up inside

there he was in the corner of the room w angelina, both sharing a laugh and a drink.

what does she have that you don’t?

they’re both so close to eachother enjoying their time, you and fred used to look like that as well. not wanting to disrupt their time you decide it’s best to leave the party completely and go to your dorm, silent years already forming in your eyes.

settling in your dorm you sit at you vanity removing all of tonight’s makeup one by one, removing each eyelash and wiping off the rest of your face makeup with tears in your eyes.

you don’t want to let fred go, but if he was happy with her you should be happy for him. right?

breaking your thoughts you quickly get into bed wanting to forget about everything you’re feeling. it’s like you’re numb, watching the person you love fall for someone else.

even with your heart broken in several pieces, you somehow still manage to love him.

Baby, though I've closed my eyes

I know who you pretend I am

I know who you pretend I am

drifting off into a state between consciousness and unconsciousness, you’re still able to make out when fred slips into your dorm.

he looks so happy, and you know it’s all because of her. he didn’t even spare you a glance for one second at the party today, and that confirmed everything you need to know.

fred quickly slipped behind you joining you in bed and pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead with a faint “i’m sorry love”.

why is it when the story ends we begin to feel all of it?

that was the end of yours and fred’s story, you had lost to angelina johnson.

a part of you wished you could hate her, but you can’t— she’s everything you weren’t, and everything you wanted to be.

Why not me?

part two

🏷 some moots nd others😋: @henqtic @hellohellook @sfdlm @lcvemalfcy @drachoesimp @slutfordracoluciousmalfoy @ripthatmentalhealth @littlemissnoname13 @helleli @gwlvr

[tryingmybestpls]

Two Slow Dancers

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Summary: Steve and the Reader have had feelings for each other for years now. The night before everything goes to shit, they decide to act on them.

Word Count: 1.6k

Rating: R

Warnings: Angst, longing, the use of an amazing Mitski song, mentions of a graphic death, sadness, I’m so sorry

Her fingers danced on top of the various bottles of liquor. She hums softly to herself before grabbing the bottle of Asgardian mead she had taken from Thor earlier. The hero stood on her tippy toes in order to get a glass off of one of the higher shelves. Her hand reached for a second one when she heard someone walk into the room.

"Want a drink, Steve?" Y/N asks, not needing to turn around to know that he was there. The Captain chuckles, walking further into the room. She doesn't wait for him to answer as her hand picks up two glasses while the other holds the neck of the glass bottle. She turned on her heel, placing the glasses on the counter just as he sits down on one of the bar stools. He's dressed down, wearing a smile white t-shirt that's way too tight for his body and a pair of sweatpants. His hair is wet, freshly washed. The man's ready for bed yet he still is sitting across from her, as happy as a clam.

"I can never say no to you, Y/L/N." Steve replies, a smile on his face. A smile of her own appears on her face as she opens the bottle, immediately pouring them both a glass. How many times before a mission had they done this? Just the two of them sharing a drink while everyone else sleep. Dozens? Hell, maybe even a hundred. She hand him his glass, which he quickly takes, his fingers brushing against hers.

"Good, because drinking alone is depressing." Y/N grins at him, tapping her glass against his, ignoring the way her heart seemed to skip a beat, her fingertips burning from having touched his. Steve's grinning from ear to ear now as he holds his glass in his hand, shaking his head.

"Should we cheers to something? I feel like we should." He questions, looking at her. his eyes are twinkling in the low light, reminding her of the lake outside. Y/N bites her lip, thinking for a moment before she raises her glass in the air.

"To time travel." She announces, grinning at him. Steve rolls his eyes as he lifts his glass, tapping it against hers. It's tradition amongst friends. Nothing else.

"To time travel." Steve repeats before they both lift the glasses to their mouths, taking a long drink. It takes like honey as it goes down her throat, slightly easing the way her stomach has been twisting and turning all day. Its the only thing that'll get both of them drunk and with what is going to happen tomorrow-it's much needed. Y/N pulls the glass away from lips, trying to force herself to unwind.

"You wanna sit? Just for a bit?" She motions towards the living area. Steve follows her line of sight before nodding. She walks around the island, moving past him to go sit in one of the big love seats, pulling her knees into her chest. He sits down on the seat beside hers, looking far more relaxed than she does.

"Penny for you thoughts?" Steve asks, looking over at her. Y/N looks down at her glass, her thumb wiping away some of the spilled drink as she stays silent for a moment.

"I have a bad feeling about tomorrow, Steve." She murmurs to him, raising her glass to her lips. Y/N hopes that the alcohol will continue to calm her nerves, that it'll just take the edge off.

"You always have a bad feeling. We-We're going to be okay." He responds, offering her a smile that's as sweet as candy.  Y/N swallows her drink and rolls her eyes.

"Have I ever told you how annoying your optimism is? Because it is." She teases, acting annoyed even though she loves his optimism. It balances out her pessimism, it reminds her that not everything is all doom and gloom.

"And here I was thinking that my optimism is exactly why you keep me around." Steve jokes right back, a shit-eating grin on his face. Y/N scoffs, trying to ignore the way blood rushed to her cheeks and the tip of her ears.

"You're such a dork." Y/N says, trying to ignore the way that he was making her feel, even as his chuckle makes a million butterflies fly around her stomach. She looks down at her glass, unable to stop herself from smiling. The weight on her shoulders had been lifted ever so slightly. That was just the effect Steve had on her.

They both have had feelings for each other for years now, although neither knew that it was mutual. For the others, it had just been this unspoken thing. Y/N and Steve really, really liked each other but they are both too chicken shit to do anything about it. It didn't matter that they had spent three years apart and it didn't matter that over the past five years they hadn't seen each other as much as they would've liked. Those feelings were still there and they had never left.

It was like something in the air had shifted.

Maybe Y/N's worries had settled into Steve or maybe he finally realized the gravity of the whole situation. Maybe the Star Spangled Man with a Plan was tired of waiting, tired of hoping the right time and right place would come to him, tired of wondering when he was going to work up the courage to say something. Steve didn't know how tomorrow was going to play out and because of that he finally felt that courage building up, felt his heart starting to beat faster in his chest.

"Dance with me." Steve says as he suddenly stands, the drink in his glass sloshing the sides, almost spilling. Her eyebrows knitting together as she looks up at him, a bit confused.

"I'm sorry-what?" Y/N questions as he quickly sets his drink aside and holds his hand out to her, his brows knitting together.

"Y/N, I've been waiting for the right partner and I just want to have a dance with you. I-We've waited too long for this and I can't wait anymore. So will you dance with me?" The Captain asks, his hand still outstretched towards her. Her bottom lip trembles, her eyes filling with tears as she starts to nod, feeling her heart swell in her chest. Y/N takes his hand and stands, putting her drink down.

"FRIDAY, play something slow and sweet from one of my playlists." She says softly, smiling up at Steve. He carefully (and awkwardly) wraps one hand around her waist, the other moving to hold her hand in his. Y/N's hand moves to rest on his chest, carefully, as if she moves too fast of isn't delicate enough this all might end.

"Of course, Miss Y/L/N." FRIDAY replies, a song immediately starting. It'a slow and it's sad, but there is just a tinge of sweetness to it.

"Does it smell like a school gymnasium in here? It's funny how they're all the same It's funny how you always remember And we've both done it all a hundred times before It's funny how I still forgot"

The two moved slowly side to side, their hands clutched together. They could both feel a sinking feeling in their stomachs as they moved, that initial happiness being replaced by anxiousness. Both heroes were terrified of tomorrow, of losing the other.

"It would be a hundred times easier If we were young again But as it is And it is We're just two slow dancers, last ones out We're two slow dancers, last ones out"a

Neither could voice those feelings or the feelings they have both had for each for years now. Y/N lets the tears roll down her cheeks as Steve slowly, cautiously leaned forward and placed his lips against the top of her forehead as he brings their hands close to their bodies.

"And the ground has been slowly pulling us back down You see it on both our skin We get a few years and then it wants us back"

Tomorrow they'd be sent on their separate journeys. Tomorrow they would have to worry about the other getting hurt. Tomorrow they would have the weight of the universe on their shoulders. But tonight they were right here, holding one another.

It would be a hundred times easier If we were young again But as it is And it is

Tomorrow, Steve would watch as she met her sudden and swift end, taking one of The Mad Titan's blades through her abdomen. He'd would run towards her, crying out her name as she stumbled and fell to the ground. By the time he'd get there, by the time he pulled her into his arms,  she'd be bleeding out. Y/N will be unable to talk, sputtering and gasping for air, her blood covering her teeth and lips as the battle continued all around then. He'll start crying, practically sobbing as he told her over and over that he loved her and that she couldn't leave him, not yet. Her blood would get all over his hands and his suit and he would hold her as she struggled to take her final breath.

But tonight, they held each other and swayed from side to side. Steve rested his cheek against her forehead, both of them letting their eyes flutter shut. Tonight, all that mattered was that they were together and it seemed like things were looking up for them.

Tonight, they danced.

To think that we could stay the same To think that we could stay the same To think that we could stay the same But we're two slow dancers, last ones out We're two slow dancers, last ones out Two slow dancers, last ones out

[marshmellowtea]

i woke with her walls around me, nothin' in her room but an empty crib

listen on 8tracks here.

listen on youtube here.

this is a playlist for mia and ethan winters, spanning across their relationship pre and post resident evil 7 and 8 (though it mostly focuses on resident evil 7 and the space in between the games). the songs are ordered in a way that’s meant to loosely order the events of said games, though of course things don’t always match up exactly. i hope other mithan enthusiasts will enjoy this, cuz i had a lot of fun making it! :P 

tracklist, annotations and timeline under the cut: 

Pre Resident Evil 7

1. When the Day Met the Night - Panic! at the Disco 

When the moon found the sun // He looked like he was barely hanging on // But her eyes saved his life // In the middle of summer ... Well, he was just hanging around, then he fell in love // And he didn't know how, but he couldn't get out // Just hanging around, then he fell in love 

2. Fidelity - Regina Spektor 

I never loved nobody fully // Always one foot on the ground // And by protecting my heart truly // I got lost in the sounds

3. Who’d Have Known - Lily Allen 

I haven't left you for days now // And I'm becoming amazed how // You're quite affectionate in public // In fact your friend said it made her feel sick // And even though it's moving forward // There's just the right amount of awkward // And today you accidentally called me "Baby"

4. Every Night - Imagine Dragons 

My mind is made up // Nothing could change that // I'm coming home to you // Every night, every night, every night, every night ... No matter, no matter, no matter what we're facing // It don't matter, it don't matter // 'Cause the reason that I'm here // Is the same through all these years // I'm not changing, I'm not changing anything at all

Resident Evil 7

5. Candy (Paulo Nutini Cover) - Marina

I was perched outside in the pouring rain // Trying to make myself a sail // Then I'll float to you my darling // With the evening on my tail // Although not the most honest means of travel // It gets me there nonetheless

6. Ilomilo - Billie Eilish 

Where did you go? // I should know, but it's cold // And I don't wanna be lonely // So show me the way home // I can't lose another life ... The world's a little blurry // Or maybe it's my eyes // The friends I've had to bury // They keep me up at night ... I tried not to upset you // Let you rescue me the day I met you // I just wanted to protect you // But now I'll never get to

7. Are You Hurting the One You Love? - Florence + the Machine 

Are you hurting the one you love? // And was it something you could not stop // Could not stop // Stop // Could not stop...

8. the run and go - Twenty One Pilots 

I am up against the wall, the wall // Pa, I hear them coming down the hall // I have killed a man and all I know is // I am on the run and go // Don't wanna call you in the nighttime // Don't wanna give you all my pieces // Don't wanna hand you all my trouble // Don't wanna give you all my demons // You'll have to watch me struggle // From several rooms away // But tonight, I'll need you to stay

9. American Beauty / American Psycho - Fall Out Boy 

You take the full, full truth, then you pour some out // You take the full, full truth, then you pour some out // And you can kill me, kill me or let God sort ‘em out // And you can kill me, kill me or...

10. Dixie Boy - April Smith And The Great Picture Show 

Don't make me come over there // 'Cause ladies, I'm a lady but please understand // When it comes to my boy, I will fight like a man // I will seek, and I will destroy // For the apple of my eye, my pride and joy // My Dixie Boy

11. Evelyn - Kim Tillman & Silent Films

I've been awake // To see the day // Devour the night // I've seen decay // Give way to growth // And make the most // Of nearly nothing ... These lofty thoughts are killing me // Preoccupied by what I could be // I get so high on my ideals // Don't call me down // But you can meet me where I land

Post Resident Evil 7

12. Woman Woman - AWOLNATION

I may be worthless without you // I'll never decide to replace you // Amen, the worst is behind us now // (Woman woman)

13. Holding Onto You - Twenty One Pilots 

I'm taking over my body, back in control, no more "shotty" // I bet a lot of me was lost, "T"'s uncrossed and "I"'s undotted ... You are surrounding, all my surroundings // Sounding down the mountain range of my left-side brain // You are surrounding, all my surroundings // Twisting the kaleidoscope behind both of my eyes // And I'll be holding on to you 

14. Tiptoe Through The True Bits - Los Campesinos! 

Girl, I helped you with your demons // But your ghosts are now haunting me too ... But if we tiptoe through the true bits // We might make it to the other side // What doesn't kill you leaves you wounded // But I will nurse you better, alright // I've been waking on your side of the bed // As the sun's been rising in the West

15. Like Real People Do - Hozier 

I knew that look, dear: eyes always seeking // Was there in someone that dug long ago // So I will not ask you why you were creeping // In some sad way, I already know // So I will not ask you where you came from // I would not ask and neither would you // Honey, just put your sweet lips on my lips // We should just kiss like real people do 

16. Me And My Husband - Mitski 

But me and my husband // We are doing better // It's always been just him and me // Together // So I bet all I have on that // Furrowed brow // And at least in this lifetime // We're sticking together // Me and my husband // We're sticking together // And I'm the idiot with the painted face // In the corner, taking up space // But when he walks in, I am loved, I am loved

Resident Evil 8/Post Resident Evil 8

17. Sleep Awake - Mother Mother

Lie awake, I sleep awake // I sleep with one hand on my 45, the other 'round my baby's waist // Lie awake, I sleep awake // I go to bed with all my lights turned on // So I don't slip away // I stay awake

18. Four Seasons - Los Campesinos! 

When I come home it will be with // Someone else's blood on my shirt // Another county's dirt on the knees of my ripped jeans // And I won't wanna talk about it ... As you bathe the stains from my skin // Only dirt is washed away // 'Cause all the bad lays far more deep // Please, I don't wanna talk about it

19. Work Song - Hozier 

When my time comes around // Lay me gently in the cold dark earth // No grave can hold my body down // I'll crawl home to her ... My babe would never fret none // About what my hands and my body done // If the Lord don't forgive me // I'd still have my baby and my babe would have me

20. I Will Follow You Into The Dark - Death Cab For Cutie 

Love of mine, someday you will die // But I'll be close behind; I'll follow you into the dark // No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white // Just our hands clasped so tight, waiting for the hint of a spark // If Heaven and Hell decide that they both are satisfied // Illuminate the "No"s on their Vacancy signs // If there's no one beside you when your soul embarks // Then I'll follow you into the dark

[bellalikeskitties]

me and my husband (we are doing better) ☾

pairing: lee taeyong x reader x johnny suh

this is the decision you made, and he is the person you chose, so you’re just going to stick with him. you both have your problems, but this is your life and you’re going to live it. 

based on mitski’s me and my husband

word count: 1.2k 

genre: angst? married au, implied female reader

warning/s: abusive relationship w/ john

a/n: I literally can’t stop singing this song so im making a fic out of it, also hello to my 15 wips lmao, also i am no way describing the person himself, this is a work of fiction, johnny is the biggest sweetheart I know

also big thanks to @splootdoolies​ for being a wonderful beta reader <33 luv u, check them out, they’re an amazing artist

Loud ticking from the dainty cream clock in the corner covered the room like a blanket. The sound not blearing into the ears, simply passing by like it wasn’t even there. Sunlight peered into the slits of the blinds, landing onto both of your seated figures. Taeyong sat straight, his collars pressed neatly into place. He looked professional, sleek, and cold. But his eyes held warmth, something he always had when it came to you.

After a quick swipe of tongue over his lower lip, he spoke. "How are you?". Quick, modest, and easy; all of his questions were like that. No beating around the bush, no underlying message or figure of speech. It was direct to the point.

How were you?

Finally, the light is pointed towards you. Seated across him, hands folded in place, legs crossed, leaning into the smooth couch he provided. In contrast to Taeyong’s suit and tie, you wore a dress with a light shade of yellow. Blinding for Taeyong, for you looked too glad, too fake. You pursed your lips, tilting your head for effect.

"The world is too big for us to live in; too much space to fill for a simple woman. There is a whole of the unknown, just waiting to be discovered. We are but insignificant, a tiny speck in the universe with a life to match. Sometimes I feel as if I'm doing something wrong by simply breathing." The latter part of your words came as a whisper, floating over to the man's ears.

"The air we breathe is of no one's property, miss (y/n). You are free to do as you wish, it is your life to live."

His steady breaths linger in his words, wanting to somehow communicate with you, to match with how you were. A sigh and now he's chewing on the insides of his mouth. You glance behind him, the small items in the room. It was best for people in his job description to have a welcoming workspace. A soft palette of colors instead of bright shades that took your attention.

Smoothening your skirt, you continue. "Johnny, well, Johnny was--". You cleared your throat, and Taeyong's hand quickly jots down on the paper he held.

"Well, in high school, he was such an athlete, still is. Used to be busy after class for practice, and that's how we met. I fell in love with him after seeing how immersed he was in the sport, ironic, due to how unfit I was.

He was never one to brag or be arrogant, but he liked to keep things with himself. I used to remember having to comfort him whenever he furrowed his brows, he liked to do it when something wasn’t right.” Your fondness didn’t go unnoticed by him, his own shoulders relaxing as he matched the small smile you had on your face.

You were truly the only thing that made Taeyong feel this way. An overflowing amount of affection that had him addicted to your meetings. He wished for more time, an excuse, dinner maybe, just something for you to see him as a man. His thoughts put on pause, his attention now on your fiddling fingers.

“And then, we got married. The love of my life, I was overjoyed. Nothing could ever compare to what I felt when I walked down the aisle and saw Johnny with that stupid grin of his. Of course, as you know, the happiness was short-lived. After a few months, he changed, for the worse. And the rest, history.” Your voice was soft, something Taeyong noticed from the first day. It was usual with women with a history of abuse, always feeling small and insignificant.

He would never treat you that way.

He shook his head lightly, dismissing all incompetent thoughts from his head. He knew history. He knew how your husband would beat you senseless at night, only to apologize the next morning, claiming it was unintentional. Taeyong had his own anger, yes, but towards your spouse. Your mention of his past affiliation with sport only added fuel to the fire. You were so precious, until Mr. Suh decided you weren’t. Reasoning with love and stress from work, you let him do as he wanted. Too good for your own sake, you forgave his actions, day after day. Until finally, your mother noticed. Taeyong knew history, alright. How Johnny had supposedly changed after months without you. So here you were, with a psychiatrist to heal the mental wounds.

“It’s history, Mr. Lee. I’m a wife, and after all, it has been always just him and me together. It was us against the world. I felt so senseless, so out of place in my own life.” Your hands trembled slightly, watching the man write seamlessly from what you said. “I may take up space in this world, but when he walks in, I am loved. I feel loved. So I’m betting all I have on his furrowed brow, and at least in this lifetime, we’re sticking together.”

The soft thud made you look up, Taeyong had an unreadable expression before he apologized and picked up the fallen pen. “Miss (y/n), are you sure about your decision?”.

He wanted you to say no, to ask him to help you leave whatever relationship you had left with your abuser. Conflict arose within him; professionalism, or humanity. And for whatever reason, he glanced towards your powdered neck and the small spots that peeked under the hem of your skirt. Your chuckle leads his eyes back on your face, suddenly realizing how hollow your cheeks looked, with the addition of dark circles. “Mr. Lee, you don’t seem to understand. Me and my husband, we are doing better.”

His lips curved down, but before he could even reply, a sharp knock cut your conversation. Both your heads turned to the door and a mop of blonde hair entered. “(y/n), you know we have a dinner reservation, right? We can't afford to be late.” Johnny’s voice was lower than Taeyong’s, he looked taller, bulkier even. Everything he had done to you must have extremely hurt, coming from someone like him.

“Of course dear, I will be with you in a minute. I’ll just finish things up here.” Your sweet smile cuts through Taeyong like a knife, the realization of his unconditional feelings dawning over. And while you hadn’t seen it, Johnny had. The tall man walked closer to you, tugging at your arm to rise you up with ease. “Don’t worry, I’ll thank Mr. Lee here. You go on and wait in the car for me, okay?”. The grip he had made you nod immediately, muttering a quiet ‘thank you, see you next month’ at Taeyong before leaving the room.

His eyes were on the door where you had left, while Johnny’s were pinned right at Taeyong. “My wife is wonderful, isn’t she?”. Emphasizing on ‘wife’, he looked down on him, sizing him up like prey. “Miss (y/n) is pleasant.” He prayed he wouldn’t notice how shaky his voice was, or how his eyes flinched when he mentioned you. The ticking returns, but now it feels deafening, striking them with unfiltered tension.

“She must have mentioned our situation, and how we’ve decided to work things out.” Johnny accompanies the ticking, tapping his finger over the table. “I’ve also decided that (y/n) doesn’t need to do these ‘monthly check-ins’ anymore. She’s alright now, just fine.” Dread. Dread and grief runs through Taeyong as he registered what he said.

You’re stopping your sessions.

And as if Johnny noticed, he chuckled. “Good day to you, Mr. Lee.”

@nct-writers​

[drawlfoy]

The Wonders of Ohio P.5

masterlist (check here for parts 1-4!) request guidelines

pairing: draco x reader

request: from 14 year old me babey

warnings: cringe, mentions of drug use, mentions of sex, language, and just bad writing

summary: y/n is in her senior year of high school when she is asked to take on an exchange student from britain that’s a little...different. this is NOT a nonmagic AU. draco is still a wizard and this will become and integral part of the story shortly.

a/n: heyyyy everyone. i graduated from high school this week and i’m posting this as my happy-one-year-to-me. as some of you may know, i posted my very first fic on this day a year ago. i’m really happy to see how i’ve grown since and i’m so lucky to have shared this with all of you. anyways, nittygritty--

this part is really the last slow exposition chapter. chapters 6 on will be a whole whirlwind beginning with homecoming and i hope that you guys are willing to stick around. i promise itll be worth the wait. y/n is going to get the story arc of a lifetime and also please do not hate heather she is just going through it ok 

anywayssssssss

tags tags tags  @gruffle1 @missmulti @cleopatera @hahaboop @accio-rogers @geeksareunique @eltanin-malfoy @war-sword @cams-lynn @itsivyberry @ayo-cowbelly @nerd-domland @erisdogwood @loveissupernatural

word count: 4.6k (;))

song recs: 

strawberry blonde -- mitski 

in your neighbors garden -- mimi bay

wishes -- beach house

ode to artifice -- samia 

pink in the night -- mitski

enjoy <3

The seatbelt buckle scorched the side of Y/N’s exposed neck as she turned to face the disheveled blonde in the passenger seat.

“Do I need to teach you to set an alarm?” 

Draco let out a huff. “Stop. Do you have a….a comb, or a brush, or something here?” His hands looked abnormally fidgety. Their actions were shaky, varying from patting his pockets to running through his hair. He seemed more and more frustrated each time his hands left his pockets empty. 

How curious Y/N thought as she racked her brain for any remembrance of putting a brush in her car. It was always a mess, and she honestly couldn’t blame Draco for assuming that anything could be in there.

“I don’t think there’s one here,” said Y/N, trying to sound at least a little sympathetic despite the fact that his tardiness had them 10 minutes late. “You can look around if you want, king.”

“What’d you call me?” His voice was suddenly sharp and awake.

Y/N rolled her eyes so hard that she thought they’d get stuck in the back of her head. “You don’t--ok. It’s a joke. You can call guys here that.”

“And it means that I’m…?”

“It means I’m acknowledging that you exist, I guess. It’s not like it has a strict negative or positive connotation. Like, I can say ‘Ok king’ to any man telling me something and it can either be sarcastic, or it can be because I don’t know what else to say and just want to let him know I heard him.”

Draco’s eyes looked a tad glazed over when Y/N dared a glance in his direction.

“I know it’s confusing. I’m sorry. I’ll try and ease you into the world of American slang.” 

He granted her a little “uh-huh” before opening up the glovebox with great difficulty and rummaging through the mess. Y/N would’ve felt more embarrassed about the tampon that fell on the ground in the process if he seemed like he actually knew what it was. 

Her attention turned back to the road as Draco continued to sift through things. Y/N couldn’t help but wonder if there was anything embarrassing hidden away in the corners of her car--after all, it hadn’t been organized since the beginning of summer--and decided that it was better to pretend it wasn’t happening.

It wasn’t the eerie silence that eventually prompted her to turn to look his direction--no, it was the weird energy in the car, like the feeling right before a thunderstorm. All the hair raised on her arms, and she shivered...but it was stifling hot in the car.

“Oh, did you find a brush?” she asked. His hair laid as perfectly as always, but his hands were lying shaking in his lap, palms to the sky. No hairbrush was in sight.

“Er... “ He was paler than usual, which was quite the feat for someone who looked like a ream of paper. “No. Just remembered a trick my father taught me.”

She tensed at the mention of his father--the very first time Draco had done so. “Oh. Okay. Glad you got it figured out, king.”

Her voice lightened on the last word, hoping she could coax a little smile out of him. 

“Don’t call me that.”

“Ok.”

oOo

 There were many things Y/N thought she understood, but Draco Malfoy being in her Physics C class was not one of them. She took pity and sat next to him as he fumbled his way through the first lecture. His notes, while neat, were littered with crossed out portions and question marks. 

You do know there’s an eraser on your pencil, right? she jotted on a note that she sent his way. His brow furrowed and he seemed to tap at the end of the eraser for just a few moments before deciding otherwise and xing out another practice problem he’d done incorrectly. Symbols that she’d never seen before were scattered all throughout his notes. 

Maybe the UK kids just learn stuff differently.

By the time that Physics came to an end, Y/N was eager to get away from the storm cloud that was brewing over Draco’s perfectly smoothed and infuriatingly pretty moonbeam colored hair. The amount of attention he was getting from all the other girls made Y/N want to jump off a cliff--suddenly everyone was her “best friend” “just wanting to check up on what happened over summer”. She was grateful to see the face of Lizzy, grinning and looking mischievous during their break period.

“You must be Draco,” said the redhead, a glint in her eyes. He looked a little scared.

“Er...yeah.”

“Mind giving us some privacy? Y/N and I have some urgent matters to discuss,” she continued, looking him up and down. Y/N attempted to ignore the twist in her gut as she watched him swallow and nod, turning away to go brood elsewhere. Once he was out of sight, Lizzy grabbed her arm and yanked her into the girl’s bathroom.

“It’s so funny how he’s following you around like a lost puppy,” Lizzy said. “Also, he’s gorgeous. If you don’t at least try to get some of that, then I’m never trusting your judgement again.”

“But, Li-”

“The boy’s a fucking walking Wattpad story cover. Dark, tragic past, unbelievably sharp jawline, rich parents, exotic accent....honestly, Y/N, I don’t know what else you could want.” 

“Mom literally called him my host brother,” said Y/N. The bathroom was starting to smell suspiciously like cotton candy. “That’s wrong. On so many levels.” 

“But you’re not related!”

“But it’s gross! And predatory! The kid doesn’t even know how to do basic algebra! I’m all he has!” 

Lizzy’s eyebrow found its new home in the middle of her forehead. “You’ve gone absolutely batty if you think that every girl cursed with attraction to men in Cincinnati wouldn’t jump his skin at the chance. Use your head, queenie. He’s not alone. Shoot your shot.”

Y/N opened her mouth to serve back a retort--that was definitely there, thank you very much--but decided against it once she realized that the bathroom had become dead silent. “Um...maybe we can go over this later.” She flickered her eyes over to the line behind them that was now intently hanging on their every word. “I forgot I had to talk to the counselor.”

Lizzy was smirking as they exited the bathroom and began the search for Draco. It didn’t take long--the circle comprised of Heather and her friends was more than enough of a giveaway that he was about. 

“Draco, sorry to make you wait,” Y/N called out. It took all her effort to abstain from cringing as her voice rang out across the group. Heather turned to send her a big smile.

“Hey Y/N! You didn’t tell me that Draco was from London!” 

“He’s not,” she responded. “He’s from Wiltshire.” 

“Wiltshire. Of course. That’s what I meant.”

Draco’s smile was tense as he looked down at Heather--who stood roughly 4 inches below him--but he was smiling, and that wasn’t something that Y/N was on the receiving end of frequently. She didn’t know whether to be offended or relieved.

“I’m sure. Break’s almost over, Draco. I can show you where the English department is before the time is up.” 

 He paused, looking down at the blonde grinning up at him. “Er, actually, Heather already offered to show me around for the rest of the day.”

“Yeah, for sure. I’ll see you in French.”

Y/N was shocked at the sheer amount of jealousy that rose up in her throat as she turned away and made her way to Art History---the only class Y/N and Draco didn’t share. The walk was strange. Being in solitude after having a gloomy British boy attached to her hip was understandably eerie. Because that’s all it was. Adjustment. Nothing else.

She settled in at a table full of her friends, namely Sylvia. The tall girl was always a bit whimsical, but Y/N found that she was a breath of fresh air compared to everyone else. It made sense that Sylvia would take Art History--her dark academic inspired aura and the perpetually hot mug of black coffee just screamed history nut. 

“How’s your new brother?” she asked after the teacher had taken attendance. “I say that because I haven’t heard his name yet.”

“Ick, it’s gross to think of him as my brother,” Y/N responded. “And I know! We need to catch up. I’m sorry about not talking to you for a bit. The time difference was a bit weird during your trip.”

“It’s ok, I get it. I was away on family business, anyways. I didn’t expect you to spend your days staying up until the wee hours of the night to tell me all about your exchange student. Anyways. His name?”

“You’re gonna scream when you hear it, Vie,” she said. “Draco Malfoy. It’s so posh. You have no idea. It definitely suits him, though. He’s very...You good?” 

Sylvia’s olive toned face looked a bit paler than usual. “Yeah. Yeah, I just remembered that I forgot to take the trash out this morning. I’ll have to text my mom about it.” She adjusted the wool cardigan that hung around her shoulders and came up looking composed. “Draco, huh? His parents must hate him.”

“At the very least! He’s so rude. And uptight. I can’t tell if it’s just a Brit thing or if it’s because he’s an asshole.” 

Sylvia laughed. “I mean, when I was there over the summer, it was a different culture for sure. We’re by far louder. But I didn’t meet many mean ones. You must’ve just got a bad apple, then.”

“I guess so. He is pret--”

“Ladies, is there something you’d like to share with the rest of the class?”

“No, Mrs. Jensen,” Sylvia and Y/N said in unison. 

oOo

“Thoughts, king?” 

“I told you not to call me that.” Draco glared at her as he tried to open the passenger side door to find that it was locked tight. “Unlock? Please?”

“And I told you not to get cozy with ASB kids, yet here we are,” said Y/N as she slotted the key into the lock and turned. 

“What’s it to you?”

“Nothing. I’m just looking out for you.” She slammed the door shut and threw her bag in the bag. The line of traffic to get out of the school was long and stuffy, and she was eager to just get it over with.

The wait was so hot that Draco peeled off his stupid formalish jacket that was on thin ice of being called a blazer and probably worth more than her car. Y/N tried to look away as his hair became slightly ruffled, but she couldn’t pry her eyes away. It was endearing, almost, how someone who could look so posh and serious could have ruffly hair--and hair that naturally light, too. She had asked him one night if it was dyed, and he scowled at her and told her the grammatically correct term was dead, and that his hair was alive, just like the rest of him, thank you very much. She dropped it. 

Y/N finally rolled down her window after the AC simply refused to satisfy her, and the wind was a nice reminder to keep in her own lane. Draco was beautiful. There was no other way to put it. He had a feel of power to him, like he was capable of anything but just held it back. But he was just as inaccessible as he was pretty, and there was nothing she could do about that.

“Y/N?” He asked after a few moments of sitting in silence. “What’s Homecoming?” 

“Who told you about that?” 

“Heather. She asked if I had a date. Is that like a ball here?”

“She asked you if you had a date on the first day?”

“Yeah.”

“Fuck. ASB kids never do sleep, huh.” 

“What?”

“Homecoming isn’t a ball. It’s like a...an…” Y/N paused as she saw Draco raise his eyebrows. “It’s, like, uh….Well I guess it is like a ball. An American one, though. Way less extravagant. It’s an excuse to get dressed up and run around the city. There technically is a dance, and all the ASB kids have to go, but literally no one else does but the underclassmen. Normally I go out with my friends and a date to somewhere fun and take pictures. And then get trashed afterwards.”

“Classy,” said Draco. “I think you can go now.”

A honk behind her emphasized his point as the space in between her and the car in front widened substantially. 

“Thanks. Anyways, it’s not really a big deal. I’d suggest not going with Heather so you can skip out on the dance portion. Or if you want to go with her, get her to come with us into Cincinnati because I am not going to spend my last homecoming watching a grind circle.” 

“A...what circle? And I don’t want to go with her.”

The relief Y/N felt was embarrassing. “Um...better if you don’t worry about it. You have a long time to figure it out anyways.”

He seemed satisfied with that answer, propping his elbow up on the center console. The pristine button up he was wearing had ridden up, exposing the pale skin and the bottom of the tattoo she had seen a hint of earlier. “Do you have a date?”

“Um. No, not yet. I don’t think anyone except for couples do yet. We have until the end of this month to figure it out, so I’m not too worried about it.”

He nodded as Y/N’s car finally left the school parking lot and began picking up speed. 

“I’m assuming you had balls? At your posh boarding school?” 

“Er…” Draco ran his hand through his hair, ruffling it further. “We only had one. It was when I was 14. We called it the Yule Ball.”

“Why only one?”

“It was for a special occasion. We had two other schools join us as well. It was quite a good time.”

“So every student only has one ball in their lifetime?”

“Of course not. Some of us--the ones from old families--have events like that regularly.”

“I’m sorry if this is overstepping my bounds,” began Y/N, noticing how he tensed up, “So you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. But, I’m just wondering, what is your family like?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like are they nice?”

“Oh.” The line in his forehead relaxed. “No. They wouldn’t like you.”

“Glad to hear it,” she said. “Do you like them?”

She heard the breath hitch in his throat. “I don’t know anymore.”

“I’m sure it’s hard to think about it when you feel like they’ve just shipped you off without anyone,” she added. “I’m really sorry, Draco. I know I’ve been a bit mean to you. I know that I’ll never be able to understand what you’re going through right now.”

The slight smile that spread across his face would’ve knocked her to her knees if she wasn’t already sitting down. “It’s okay. I wouldn’t expect you to understand.”

The silence that awaited them for the rest of the journey was comfortable.

oOo

School began to pick up the pace after the first few days. Y/N got into the swing of homework and her extracurricular workload. Draco was having a bit more difficulty, she presumed, but he’d never admit to it. She took pity one evening and gave him her laptop opened to a Khan Academy tab for Physics and was pleased to see that he showed up to class the next day with completed homework. He asked to borrow her laptop on a much more frequent basis after that. 

The routine they settled into had her heart leaping into her chest almost constantly--they’d eat breakfast together at the table, Y/N would try to ignore how pretty he looked across the table as they shared a pot of black tea (earl grey, which Y/N was thrilled to learn was his favorite as well), they’d get in the car, she’d write him notes in physics to help him (even though he never asked, he always smile and give a little shake of his head before unfolding them and intently staring at her writing), they’d drive home together and bitch about their French teacher, he’d retire to his room and do whatever pretty blonde Brits do in the afternoon, they’d meet unexpectedly at the same time in the late evening to have a final cup of tea, and then they’d go to bed and do it all over again. 

It was difficult for her to admit, but Y/N was falling very quickly for Draco. It was gross, and wrong, and manipulative, and completely against the code of conduct for exchange families, but she couldn’t help but spend her days fantasizing about how his gold-spun hair would feel as she ran her fingers through it or how gently she’d trace her fingers around the tattoo on the soft flesh of his forearm…

But Y/N knew those thoughts weren’t right. And they would go away. Eventually. 

“How’s it going?” Sylvia asked, effectively snapping her out of her thoughts. The Art History sub told them to go into independent study, whatever that meant. Y/N was not very good at either of those words.

“Pretty good. I can’t believe it’s been 3 weeks already,” she said. “It’s gonna be Halloween before we know it.”

“I can’t fucking waitttt,” said Sylvia. “I’m gonna be Wednesday Addams.”

“Again?”

“What else would I be? I get a new high collared black dress every year. It’d be a shame if it were going to go to waste. What are you gonna be?”

“One of the thousands of students finishing their UChicago ED app hours before the deadline.”

“You’re kidding. Can’t you just finish it the day before?”

“Where’s the fun in that? And, plus, I don’t have an idea as cool as Wednesday.”

Sylvia smirked as she opened up her planner and began to jot down something. “How’s Draco doing? I haven’t seen much of him lately. It seems like he never hangs out with us at break anymore.”

“Yeah, I ended up getting him connected with the Physics teacher. He’s getting tutored now. He thinks it’s all bullshit, but I don’t want to be the reason he doesn’t get into a good school.”

“Is that all you care about?” She smiled at Y/N. “Lizzy was telling me that you’re interested in him.”

“First of all, keep your voice down. Second of all, I’m not supposed to be, so I’m not.” Y/N hoped that the edge in her voice was convincing enough.

Her friend raised her eyebrows so dramatically that her glasses nearly slipped off her nose. “Y/N, who’s gonna hear about it. You guys are both going away at the end of the year anyways, and I’m sure he’s not going to be writing to his dear mum about his love life. If it’s consensual, there’s nothing wrong with it. I think it’d be good for both of you.”

“I see that, but let’s put me in his shoes right now.” Y/N shuffled in her seat and clasped her hands. “I’m rich. I’m British. I’m very hot. My parents throw extravagant balls for me and I kiss pretty girls that say water like ‘wota’. I’ve spent my life in silk and I only drink the finest teas. My family is so important that I had to be shipped off halfway across the world just to be safe. And now my incredibly expensive life has reached a peak because I’m sleeping with a random girl in Ohio that has run approximately 4 stop signs since I’ve met her.”

“You’re sleeping with Draco?” 

Y/N turned to see Lauren, a wide-eyed, obnoxious, but well meaning girl staring at her. She heard Sylvia stifle a laugh behind her. “No. I was kidding.” The smile that she followed with was awkward and showed way too many teeth. 

“Oh, okay,” said Lauren. “Do you know if he likes anyone?”

Sylvia’s smirk widened.

“No, actually, he’s a pretty private guy.” Y/N sent her another tense smile, and Lauren finally turned away.

“Jealous, huh?”

“Shut up, Vie. You know I wouldn’t go for him. Even if I had the chance.”

She just raised an eyebrow and smiled. 

The afternoon brought its own set of struggles. Their French teacher had blown up at another student who had been caught cheating on their last test, and it was all Y/N could do but hold back her snickers until they were out in the parking lot.

“I can’t believe they still managed to conjugate their cheat sheet wrong.” Y/N was gasping for breath as she unlocked the car door and threw her stuff inside. Draco was watching from the passenger seat, his lips in a soft upturn. “Can you imagine? Oh my god.”

He just shook his head and turned to look out the window, but she could see the smile slowly stretching across his face. “Ridiculous. You could totally tell Monsieur enjoyed it, too. I bet he gets off on making kids like Joey cry.”

“I had a teacher like that,” he started. “He was a Poti-a chemistry teacher.”

“Oh? Did he ever attack you?”

“No. He liked me. Family friends and all.”

“Ah. I almost forgot that your family was rich and influential. Thanks for the reminder.” She reached across and lightly punched his shoulder. His smile, though still remaining, seemed to shrink. “Hey, what’s that in your bag?” 

Y/N motioned to the cardstock peeking out of his nondescript black backpack that always seemed to fit more than it was meant to. She could make out a few words written in what looked like a bright red sharpie--something that did not exactly scream Draco Malfoy aesthetic.

He froze up. “Er. It’s from Heather. I think she called it a Homecoming ask?”

Y/N’s throat dried up to the point that no words would willingly make the climb from her diaphragm to her tongue; instead, she settled for giving him a little nod and what she hoped was a convincing smile.

“I told her I’d think about it,” he continued. “I remember you saying that the school dances sucked. So I let her know that I wasn’t sure yet.”

She nodded again. “Super cool. You can do whatever you want, though. You can come with my group if you’d like, but you’re welcome to go with Heather’s.”

“What? So you aren’t coming with me if I go with Heather?”

“Fuck no, dude. I don’t hate her, but I would way prefer to spend a night with my friends than some girl from my French class that only talks to me because she thinks you’re hot.” 

The expression Draco made reminded Y/N that he would never get comfortable with American girls calling him hot. “Ok. Have you found a date yet?”

“Chad from Econ asked me yesterday.”

“Is that why my seat was covered in glitter?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you going with him?” Draco’s hand was clenched tight in a fist in his lap.

“I think so,” said Y/N, steeling herself and deciding to just go for it. “But, of course, if you asked me I would say no to Chad. Just out of principle. I am supposed to be your tour guide, after all.”

The only parts of him moving were the few stray wisps of his hair being pushed around by the AC going. 

“But that’d be weird. I’d only expect you to take that up if you really didn’t want to go to the dance itself.” She swallowed and pulled out onto the main street, putting distance between them and the school. He was silent for a few moments. The quiet, normally comfortable between them, was stifling and strange. She pretended to ignore the way he was fiddling with his cuffs. 

“Yeah, it could be,” was all he said before slumping against the window and closing his eyes.

Mrs. Y/L/N was sitting at the head of the coffee table when the two arrived home, carding between a stack of letters in front of her. The mug of something--probably that new decaf blend she hadn’t stopped raving about--was sitting lopsided on a coaster, just barely about to topple off the edge. She looked like she hadn’t moved for hours, the novel she had been previously reading sat face down to preserve the spot next to her no doubt lukewarm drink.

“Hey Mom,” Y/N said as she set her keys down. “Anything good?”

She looked up, her expression morphing from startled to happy. “Other than the college brochures? Nothing, except...hm, what’s this?”

Her well manicured hand pulled at a crimson envelope, with sloping writing that seemed to shimmer in the light. 

To the Y/L/N Family, it read. The loopiness of the writing looked like it wiggled at the ends, but that had to be a trick of the light. It was dim in the kitchen during afternoons, after all. 

“It looks cool, open it u--”

“No!”

Draco’s voice had never sounded so loud as it did then as he lunged across the kitchen, snatching it out of her mother’s hand and clutching it to his chest. “Er, it’s for me. I recognize the handwriting.”

 “Cool, see you later,” said Y/N. She was up the stairs and slamming her door before either of her housemates could say another word. After the horrible embarrassment that was technically Draco’s rejection, she needed to be alone. 

Even burying her face into her pillow and squeezing her eyes shut didn’t keep the scenes from their car ride at bay. She had been so stupid, so stupid. Why did she even think he wanted that? He was her brother, after all. Oh god, does he think we’re all from Alabama or something?

She wallowed for a few more mournful minutes before deciding that she had to pick herself up and handle it like an adult. After all, she was going to be 18 in just a few months. There was no excuse for her to act like a child anymore. And, plus, it wasn’t like she couldn’t just play this off as a pity invite. Yes,that’s what she’d frame this as if he ever asked her about it again. She felt bad for him was all it was. 

Once satisfied with her internal dialogue, she rolled out of bed and made for the foyer where her bag was still on the table. She’d first walk on Legos barefoot before she had to let a stupid boy--especially one that didn’t know how to turn on their shower and had to ask for her help every time--come between her and her 4.0. Never.

Her thoughts were cut short, however, when she heard a new sound from his side of the hallway. She froze, listening closely. 

Draco was crying.

[saturno-sol]

The Brainrot has gotten to me

WELL HERE YOU GO FOLKS (almost) ALL MY NOTES ON WYRMTHREAD (Chantilly/Quezal) both in Canon and in a Happier AU because yes Most put under a readmore because its over 1K long and the very end has some suggestive things because I’m allowed to think like that too so just as a heads up

Anyways here

Canon Codex

Do not establish a relationship outside of a blooming interest in each other that gets nipped in the bud due to...yeah cries 

So let us not delve too deeply into Canon rn, and sadly since the plot absolutely needs Chantilly gone to progress we turn to HAPPIER AUS!!!!! :DDDDD because I drove myself deep into brainrot and aoughhhhghhhghhhhghh

Songs I associate with canon because music is good- 

I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO DANCE by Tyler the Creator

Mr Loverman by Ricky Montgomery

Rest Easy, I’ll See You Again by Cuco (the title is a LIE) 

Pain by Pinkpantheress

La Gata Bajo la Lluvia by Rocío Dúrcal

The Night We Met by Lord Huron (thank you Jaxx) 

Noche No Te Vayas by Los Tres Caballeros 

Better Timeline AU!!!! 

Placeholder name but honestly it might stick because I’m too lazy to think up of a better one hghfdnkj, am open to suggestions tho

Basic Premise of this AU: Through some magic fuckery or whatever, Chantilly is allowed out of the Troupe and decides to tag along with our funky wyrm gal because nowhere else to go/hrnng big lady pretty. They actually do start going out and it turns out hey! They like each other, like a lot. 

They like each other so much that they get married and bam, WyrmThread real 

This is great because not only is my otp now canon and alive, Fuego (and later on Lune when Fuego adoptskidnaps them into the family) now has both parents! And they love their kids sm like damn do not get in between them else you want to get yeeted to Unalive World. 

In this one, the motivations for [REDACTED] have now morphed into somewhat the same way in terms of being dealt with but now we got the lacey boy to help Quezal do [SPOILERS], fight [SPOILERS] and help complete [SPOILERS] and help establish her empire. (I’m sorry but I am not revealing any important Codex spoilers yet)

“Will you be the Malfina to my Connecticut Clark?” 

Girlboss and Malewife, except they’re both still murderous and would happily see you to your grave if you intervene with any of their plans. I’ve given Chantilly throwing knives :) because he deserves to be dangerous. 

He deserves to look cool!! With knives!!! Fighting alongside his wifey!! 

Of course NKG fucks off when Chantilly leaves the Troupe but I love to think of him being akin to a disapproving in-law (“Really Chantilly?? You run off and marry some wyrm that didn’t even have a kingdom to begin with? Have the standards of the Nightmare Vessels deteriorated as time went on?”) 

Chantilly is somewhat concerned that Fuego is much more, for lack of a better word, feral than a regular Grimmchild would be but he doesn’t regret the decision to have him. He loves his bitey son even if he scratches through fabrics like water. 

And Quezal enjoys having another person to coil around and snarl at anyone that gets too close to them. It does take a while until they’re like velcro due to her issues with touch being equated to violence (Thanks dad /s) but once she overcomes that fight or flight response she absolutely does not let go of him. 

Burrowing into a dark place and nuzzling until he smells like her makes Wyrm brain go brr. And since he isn’t a wyrm there’s no instinct yelling at her to maim him if there’s no babies to take care of/mating season passed, he in her eyes is harmless. Even if they both know different, at least in her brain he is just a lil guy, no threat to her. 

Chantilly loves all the attention he’s getting from her, absolutely will allow her to carry him off and coil up against him as long as he can work on sewing while she broods over him. 

He’s naturally warm and for a wyrm that needs outside heat to regulate her inner temp like a snake he’s like a hot water bottle, world cold husband warm. 

Happby family can these Queers be HAPPY PLEASE 

Love languages!!! 

Quezal once she gets comfortable with physical stuff likes to nuzzle and bite :) but not to draw any hemo or cause harm, just to hold in mouth. She also likes to do acts of service, making sure that her husband is wont for nothing and doing little things like sharpening his knives for him. 

Chantilly loves to gift-give! Usually things he made by hand. 

“Quezal pls let me make you pretty dresses and outfits please you would so look good in teal” 

He likes kissing a lot, smoochies for wife and cuddling is great for him too, as long as he can sleep with his chest unobstructed he’s good 

They both love showing each other off

“Look at my partner they’re the fucking best ever, none of you bitches can compare to them.” 

When the empire is finally formed and Quezal takes her place as Empress she offers the title of Emperor to Chantilly 

He declines, Royal titles are just not his thing and he feels uncomfortable with them, so instead he goes by the title of “Lord”

His duties consist of assisting with any paperwork Quezal doesn’t want to deal with and being eye candy (/j but also not really he loves being shown off esp in new outfits) 

He also deals with nobles that aren’t too pushy, the ones that do are quickly steered towards Quezal. And usually after a meeting with her they learn better than to try to smart mouth either of them. 

Family Notes!

Chantilly’s the one to go to if you need advice and soothing comfort

Quezal’s the one to go to if you need someone beat the fuck up and also advice but in the no nonsense way. 

She also comforts but it's not in the way that Chantilly will delicately soothe the pains away, she tells you how it is but will hug you and tuck you into bed if wanted. 

On the other hand, Chantilly is the one Fuego and Lune go to if they want to do something crazy or stupid and know that mom won’t say yes. 

He dresses them up in poofy outfits (see the clown costume I’ve thrown on Fuego as an example) and shows them off to Quezal 

“Look my dear! Aren’t they the sweetest things you have seen!” 

It is very funny 

SONGS I ASSOCIATE WITH THIS AU

Meet Me At Our Spot by WILLOW

First Love/ Late Spring by Mitski

I Hear A Symphony by Cody Fry

She’s My Collar by the Gorillaz

My Kind of Woman by Mac DeMarco

New Light by John Mayer

Vivir by Jardin

coffee by Miguel

Never Getting Rid of Me from the Waitress Musical

WARNING WARNING

Ok next few am going to be a bit suggestive so stop here if you’re not into that but

I’m debating on if they’d have more children than Fuego and Lune and if so, how many HDJFJKSJ (thinking of twins named Arco and Iris because Arcoiris means Rainbow and I kind of like that and I’m also a sucker for twins) 

Listen, they’re both switches but most if not all the time Quezal’s the one topping. The man is submissive and breedable what do you expect HDJFJS

s i z e  D i f f e r e n c e 

Chantilly is a sensual romantic and loves a lot of buildup while Quezal just wants to get on with the good stuff, they make it work with communication and understanding each other :) 

They’re both capable of carrying so if they did have more kids I’d imagine they’d take turns on who’s turn it is to be eggy. (And I have so many thoughts about how they’d treat each other while pregnant but HHHHFJFJFHHHF too embarrassed rn waagaghgg) 

These two love each other very much and I love them. 

[visionsofus]

i just binge read ur scarlet vision mixtape collection n i am in lov w it. is it possible to request me and my husband by mitski? thank u xx

anon thank you SO much for requesting this song - I’d never listened to it before! It fit perfectly and I hope you like the direction I took <3

Track #14: Me and My Husband by Mitski 

| read on AO3 here | mixtape playlist | send me an ask with your song/prompt request |

Synopsis: Vision is reminded that it is Valentine's Day and decides to show up at Wanda's safehouse to surprise her. Fluff ensues and Wanda's fugitive teammates realise exactly how close the pair have become.

“So, when are you leaving?” Tony asked around a mouthful of egg and bacon. They were sat at the dining table, Tony eating his hastily prepared breakfast while Vision perused the news on the tablet in front of him. Many a morning was spent this way, just the two of them. Occasionally they were joined by Happy and other times it was just Vision on his own.  

“Leaving? To go where?” Vision asked looking up in surprise.

Tony raised his eyebrows but finished chewing before he spoke again. “To rendezvous with your lover?”

“Oh,” Vision said setting the tablet down, they usually didn’t speak about the weeks he disappeared from the compound to see Wanda. It had become something of a taboo, out of sight out of mind, which he supposed helped Tony cope with the risk Vision put himself in every few weeks. “We don’t have plans to meet up until the end of February.”

“You’re missing Valentine’s day?” Tony asked, surprised.

“Oh yes, that is today isn’t it?” Vision murmured folding his hands before him in contemplation. “Well, we didn’t speak about needing to spend the day together, it never really came up…”

Tony looked aghast.  

“I mean I don’t think it’s important,” Vision continued hesitantly but Tony had begun to shake his head.

“No, no, no that’s not gonna cut it,” he said wiping his mouth on a napkin and standing up. “C’mon you’re going to Canada.”

“Canada? Why?”

“Because I am not going to let you stand her up on the most romantic night of the year.”

That was how Vision ended up taking the quinjet up to Canada, arriving in the late afternoon. Tony had given him obscure coordinates taking him somewhere north of Calgary.  With the jet safely cloaked and hidden off the main road he began to short walk towards the nearby converted barn that the rest of the team were reportedly residing in. In the afternoon light the fields turned a golden green and seemed to stretch on for miles.

The barn was fairly unassuming from the outside, the only evidence it was lived in being the wide windows on the second floor and what appeared to be a recent coat of paint. He hoped that they wouldn’t have to move on for a while, that this would be isolated enough they could spend some time not running for their lives.

A thin path had been carved out through what would usually be a wild assortment of plants in the front garden, though it was now scarce thanks to winter’s frosts. Set in the middle of the front of the barn was a Dutch door and Vision stepped up to it, rapping the door knocker sharply. The house was silent inside and the only sign that anyone was home was the car sat dormant in the driveway. A distorted head shape edged into view through the frosted glass, and it floated there for a moment before the door swung open to reveal Sam Wilson.

“What the hell are you doing here?” He asked in disbelief.

“Very nice to see you as well, Sam,” Vision said smiling, “is Wanda in?”

“Is Wanda in?” Sam shook his head and looked over his shoulder. “Can’t think of anywhere else she would be, we are fugitives you know.”

“I am well aware.”

Sam sighed when the sarcasm didn’t hit. “Yeah sure, c’mon in. You weren’t followed here?”

“I cloaked the quinjet through the Air Defence Identification Zone and used a secure flight path,” Vision assured him as he stepped inside, immediately noting how warm it was.

“The others are through in the living room and I think Nat is out shopping,” Sam said shutting and locking the door behind him. “Why are you here though? Anything we need to be aware of?”

“Of course not,” Vision said trying to be assuring, suddenly realising how his presence could be misleading, “I’m just here for—”

He was cut off by the welcome sound of Wanda’s voice. “Vis!” she cried in excitement running around the corner, her sock clad feet slipping on the floor and sending her careening into his arms.

Vision laughed and dipped to catch her in a tight hug. She was wrapped up in a woollen sweater that he was quite sure had once been his, but that she must have commandeered on one of their trips in the last year. She had to stand on the tip of her toes to reach but pressed several kisses on his cheeks.

“What are you doing here?” Wanda demanded, leaning back to take him in, her eyes glowing happily.

“I thought I might surprise you,” Vision said quite conscious that Sam was staring open mouthed at them.

At that precise moment Steve walked in to join the group coalescing in front of the door. He was about to bite into an apple but paused when he saw who had joined them, disbelief colouring his newly bearded face.

“Captain,” Vision nodded, “sorry for dropping in unannounced.”

“Vision,” said a dumbstruck Steve, “you’re here… not in America…”

“Yes,” he said holding his arms out to demonstrate he was indeed, physically present.

“I thought we agreed to end of the month in Venice?” Wanda asked turning to him suspiciously.

“Well, you can’t expect me to not show up on Valentine’s day,” Vision said as though it were obvious, though it had not too been obvious to him mere hours ago. The other three stared at him blankly.

“Huh, 14thof February already?” Steve said to himself.

Wanda looked surprise and laughed in disbelief. “You’re right I had no idea you’d show up for Valentine’s day.”

Vision suddenly felt a little out of place. He always met Wanda alone, never with company. They hadn’t been around the other Avengers as anything more than friends, and by now they were much more than that. It had made so much sense to come for Valentine’s day when Tony had been explaining its significance, but perhaps he had overstated the day’s importance. Feeling like a bit of a fool Vision fished around in his pockets for an apt distraction his hand landing on a bar of chocolate. “I suppose you wouldn’t be wanting any of this chocolate then?”

“Not that I need bribery to have you near me,” she said more quietly taking his hand even as Vision withdrew the Sokovian chocolate she was so fond of. It was challenging to get a hold of thanks to limited imports since the Sokovia incident. Vision made sure to buy it at any opportunity and had since amassed a small collection back at the compound for times like this. She grinned as she accepted the chocolate bar and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

“Well chocolate and Valentine’s day wishes delivered, I suppose I should leave,” Vision said looking around to see that Sam and Steve were having a silent conversation that was mostly raised eyebrows and shrugged shoulders.

“What are you talking about?” Wanda asked. “You’ve come all the way here you’re at least spending the night. Come on, I’ll show you the house.”

Secretly glad, he let her lead him around. She started at the floor they were currently on, showing him the quaint kitchen at the back of the house and the interconnected living room complete with cosy armchairs and a crackling fireplace. Upstairs were several bedrooms, not particularly large but it meant that they could each have their own spaces. Her bedroom was cast in a warm orange glow as she led him in around a small bed and pointed out the view that she had come to love over the last few weeks. It comforted him to know that she was able to have a space in this way, where she could keep things on a bedside table and put her clothes in a closet instead of the living out of a bag she did when they travelled together.

Back downstairs Natasha had returned, and Sam and Steve were unpacking the shopping in the kitchen as she unwound a scarf and removed her beanie, which had apparently been in the interest of protecting her identity.

“Good to see you Vision,” Nat said grinning at him, and he found comfort in her reaction. It wasn’t that Sam and Steve hadn’t been friendly, but it was as though they didn’t know why he was here and that made him nervous, it made him doubt.

But Wanda was his grounding force and she continued to act as though nothing were different. And so, Vision chose to follow her lead, focusing on his most important person instead of his worries.

They didn’t leave each other’s side for the remainder of the afternoon and he helped Wanda prepare the dinner when she explained it was her turn to cook for her fugitive housemates. She’d decided on a stir fry and he diligently set about slicing up the vegetables for her.

“You travelled here ok?” She said leaning her head against his shoulder as she cooked the noodles and Vision slid a responding arm around her waist.

“Of course,” he said kissing the top of her forehead.

“There was no trouble with Stark even though this wasn’t in the calendar?”

“It wouldn’t matter even if there was,” he replied and knew it was true. He was glad that Tony was so supportive of his relationship with Wanda but equally understood that nothing would have stopped him continuing to see her.  

Steve and Sam came bustling through the kitchen collecting plates and cutlery for the dining table. Vision made to draw back but Wanda grabbed his hand and kept it pressed to her side, giving him a reassuring smile that said all he needed to hear, he ducked his head to kiss her once more. On the way out Vision heard Steve loudly whisper “I think they’re really cute”. Sam’s exasperated response was, “Of course you do”.

“Who would have thought Captain America was such a sap when he wasn’t working,” Wanda said quietly to Vision as he drowned out the bickering now taking place in the other room. “He watches more rom-coms movies than all of us put together.”

It was nice to share a meal with the teammates he had grown so close to but hadn’t seen in so long, even if Vision wasn’t actually eating. They told him stories of their travels in the last eighteen months, mostly sticking to the good times though he was aware there were difficult sides to every anecdote they shared. Vision had heard stories from Wanda of the early days on the run where they took turns sleeping and keeping watch, no matter where they were or how strong the locks might be. It was a time of constant strife from what he understood. It was a relief, then, to see them in a place like this and though he knew it would be hard to stay here for ever, he was glad to hear they had plans to stay until Wanda returned from the Venice trip in April.

Afterwards he hung behind with Steve in the kitchen and helped wash up.

“It’s good you’re here,” Steve said handing him a clean plate to dry up, “it’s nice to see her so happy.”

Vision smiled at the acknowledgment, wiping the plate dry with a tea towel and setting it on the counter. “She is the strongest person I know.” Then, softer, “but I wish I could be there more often to help shoulder her burden.”

Steve hummed in agreement. “It sort of came as a surprise to all of us when she told us she’d started seeingyou. Sure, we assumed things, but I don’t think it was really clear until tonight. I’m happy for you both.”

Vision was aware that Wanda had never really sat the rest of her teammates down to hash out the specifics of what she was doing with Vision when they were away. She was content in knowing that they supported her in pursuing the relationship they now had and had never seen reason to share more than she needed to. She’d confided that there were times when she wanted to boast about their relationship, taking pride in the bond they shared which made him happy. But they both shared the feeling that the intimacy they had couldn’t be explained simply, it was uniquely theirs and he was content to not share it with anyone else if Wanda was as well.  

“It’s a relief for me, knowing that she has you,” Steve went on, “the loneliness is hard on all of us, all this moving around. Wanda had only just begun calling the compound home when we had to leave, so I’m glad she has you to come back to.”

It warmed Vision’s heart to hear how highly Wanda was appreciated in Steve’s mind, and it reassured him that she had a strong friendship with her team that could keep her afloat when they couldn’t be together.

The evening was growing late by the time they reconvened in the living room with the rest of the house’s inhabitants. Sam had stretched himself out on the couch and was starting to nod off. Nat sat in raptures over the program on television, which, by the sound of the narration, was a David Attenborough wildlife documentary.

Wanda rose from where she had been curled up in a comfy armchair and took Vision’s hand, pulling him over. Her eyes glowed with such open happiness that he couldn’t help the feeling that he was falling more and more every time they were near. It had been happening for months now, or years more likely, but at times like this it hit him just how in love he was.  

He sat down in the chair, sinking into its comfy embrace and held his arms out for Wanda who didn’t hesitate in climbing into his lap, settling against his chest and dangling her feet over the arms of the chair. He closed his eyes sighing in content, if only every night could be this way. They didn’t need a fancy dinner out, and the chocolates he gave her had been more than those little heart shaped ones he saw on tv, they’d shared a dinner with her closest friends and now settled down in a space she felt comfortable and safe in. It was his perfect evening, and he did his best to capture it in his mind, saving it to pour over and relive in the moments when they were separated, and he missed her most.

As he opened his eyes, he found her gazing at him and she scrunched her nose up happily when their eyes met. She kissed him once quickly, but he managed to tease one more longer kiss out of her before she settled into his arms fully and closed her eyes.

Vision had expected some sort of sarcastic comment regarding their affection, but the living room was comfortably quiet aside from the calming voice over of David Attenborough on the tv. A quick look over his shoulder showed that Natasha was the only one paying them real attention, she smiled at Vision and gave him a slight nod. He smiled back, a moment of gratitude for each other for being such constants in Wanda’s life.

One by one Steve, Sam and Nat trickled off upstairs, Steve pausing to whisper that he’d checked all the locks and the security system and to just turn the lights off when they went to bed. Wanda was asleep against Vision’s chest and had been for a while now, but she was so peaceful that he couldn’t bear to move her.

So, she slept on and Vision peered outside the windows into the desolate fields that spanned out from the property. He could just see the rising moon peeking out from behind the clouds, casting a strong milky glow on the fields. The fire popped and crackled more quietly now, nearly out, its last embers of warmth keeping the room nice and toasty against the February chill outside.

It was sat there in the old leather armchair with his lover gathered in his arms, miles away from any of the problems they faced in the real world that Vision stole a few breaths to let his thoughts wonder. Thinking of all the time they had been together, all that they had been through and with more challenges no doubt in their future. How he had, against all odds, fallen in love with the remarkable woman asleep in his lap, and that she had returned his affection so fervently. He often thought about the different kinds of love, wondering what he had with Wanda. Initially, when they’d lived at the compound together, he had been sure it was just curiosity, that he was only responding to how she treated him. As someone normal, a friend, a companion. Then, as time went on, he thought it might be infatuation, the desire he’d felt to be near her, to be the reason she smiled but ultimately, a short term attachment. That had all changed in the polarising events of the Accords which he had been sure would tear them apart, but here they were, over a year later and he was still very much in love. Perhaps it was as the Greeks said, six different kinds of love for different relationships. Of all the renditions, Vision supposed Pragma was closest to how he felt, the love that was not only about falling but learning to stand up and keep walking. Beyond this, Vision felt a strange certainty that they’d always be together, in some shape or form and that, when separated, they’d always find their way back to each other.

The fire finally seemed to have given all it could, and so Vision shifted slightly, rubbing Wanda’s arm to rouse her. “I’m going to take you upstairs, Wanda,” he said quietly.

“Alright,” she smiled raising her arms up sleepily which he laughed at, winding them around his neck before he lifted her up.

Upstairs he pulled the covers aside and lay her down, brushing her hair out of her face and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

“Get in bed,” she hissed covering her eyes against the overhead light which he quickly switched out.

“So demanding,” he chuckled but relented, going around the other side and changing into lighter clothes for sleeping in.

“Is there anything else you need?” Wanda said absentmindedly, still playing the host. “Another pillow? Blankets?”

Vision sighed and instead pulled her closer so that he might press his chest to her back and wrap his arms around her waist. He kissed her cheek and felt her smile into the cosy room. “I have you, my love, what else could I possible need?”

——————————————

Updated taglist open on request (dm or ask me and I’ll tag you when I update)

[lucadansembourg]

                                                                                           HSHQTASK023. 

                                                   luca & henri. 

(  LISTEN ALONG  )

                                                                                                        feat. @henridorleans

“please hurry leave me, i can't breathe, please don't say you love me.”  - track 001. first love/late spring by mitski. 

the actual  first time they meet is irrelevant, an event neither remembers. surely, over the years they’ve had conversations, somewhere, sometime. but none of them truly matter, not when faced with what they become. there’s nothing of note between them, at least nothing before the cold november night in luxembourg that they actually meet for the first time. 

the setting is a slightly seedy bar in a back alley in the heart of luxembourg, where luca d’ansembourg is chasing the bottom of a bottle yet again. he’s become something of a regular, a ruling monarch always sitting in the same booth in the back. none of the other regulars dare to bother him, they haven’t since nathalie died and luca became a shell of himself. but the color has started to return to his cheeks, word on the street is he’s begun to heal. 

maybe that’s why he seems approachable. 

henri d’orleans is traveling. he’s been north of paris, into belgium and finally he’s wound up with a few nights in luxembourg city. what draws him to the bar is unknown even to him, perhaps fate leads him through the doors. it’s nice enough, isn’t it? it takes almost an hour for him to notice the man in the booth in the back, pouring out his sorrows into a glass of whiskey yet again. 

they meet and they don’t use any bullshit titles or last names that could give them away. 

late that night, when they return to the little apartment luca keeps “just in case” they’re just people. and if luca is a little bit broken and henri is still searching for something he can’t quite grasp, they don’t mention it. 

“ oh, but i was just a placeholder a lesson to be learned oh, i was just a placeholder a place you will return.” - track 002. placeholder by hand habits.

luca wakes the next morning to his phone ringing over and over again. it’s wilhelmina, frantic with worry after luca had disappeared into the night. she’s worried, because of course she is. they’re d’ansembourgs, all they seem to do is worry these days. he tries to stay quiet, to not wake henri. 

“i’ll be back at the palace in a few hours, don’t worry, wilhelmina.” 

maybe it’s the mention of the palace, maybe it’s the way luca says wilhelmina like an exasperated older brother.

but henri has heard the entire conversation and is beginning to fit the puzzle pieces together. 

the way luca never asked for another drink, he was simply handed one by the bartender. the stares he’d gotten from the other regulars for daring to speak to the king. the expensive apartment that no one seemed to live in. it all added up to an image of the king of luxembourg henri hadn’t expected. 

he makes his excuses and goes, practically sprinting out the door with a new perspective on french relations with luxembourg. he leaves the tiny country that afternoon, the bruises still fresh on his skin, a reminder that the night before had really happened. 

luca takes a moment to put himself back together and then meets his twins and siblings for lunch, and tries to push the night out of his mind. he doesn’t frequent the bar like he used to, and when he does he even manages to give them a smile, a real one this time. maybe a night out was just what he needed. maybe he just needed to be normal for a moment. 

they swear they don’t think about it, but they do. 

“we try and connect the dots and the facts how do we have to be here? 'cause these hotels, i just can't relax the more i bend, the worse that i snap i feel like a goddamn maniac .” - track 003. ruins by jade bird.

it’s new year’s eve, and there’s far too much going on. it seems the whole world is here, every royal from every country in one ballroom in paris. for henri d’orleans, this is his element. he’s charming and easy to speak to, always able to talk his way into and out of conversations on a whim. 

on the other hand, luca d’ansembourg is simply terrible at events like these. when it’s small groups, he can almost manage to seem normal, but with the movement of the crowd and the volume of the room, he’s barely said twenty words to those around him. he prefers to be a wallflower, usually, but his sisters have been pestering him about making new friends. it’s not going well. 

luca spots him across the room and trails off mid-sentence. no one around him notices. 

he looks almost the same, if not a just a little bit more dressed up. 

that’s henri, from the bar. that’s henri, the prince of france. luca can feel the panic set in as their eyes meet across the ballroom, and he only holds henri’s gaze for a second before dashing towards an alcove he’d noticed earlier. 

he doesn’t expect henri to make his excuses and follow him. 

he’s plotting his escape and how easy it will be to become a recluse and never leave the grand palace again when henri appears in his line of vision. and even if they’re alone in the alcove, they might as well be alone at the world. 

when they’re together, it’s like everything else seems to fall away. the responsibilities, the titles, the riches, none of it matters. 

they’re counting down to the year 2019 in the ballroom, but the pair don’t seem to notice, too caught up in each other once again. it seems like the world stops as they gravitate towards each other. 

the kiss may not happen exactly at midnight, but there’s no one around to police it. 

“and it’s no one’s fault but yours at the foot of the house of cards. you thought you’d never get obsessed,  you thought the wolves would be impressed. and you’re a sinking stone, but you know what it’s like.” - track 004. the jeweler’s hands by arctic monkeys.

henri leaves before the sun comes up, almost like a force of habit. 

it’s easier that way, he always tells himself. it’s better if they just... don’t talk about it. especially because he’s not going to stick around, even if luca asked him to. it’s not personal, just... henri doesn’t need anything more, he never has. the life of royalty made things like falling in love out of question. 

when luca wakes on the first morning of the year, he’s alone. 

and he’s only able to feel bad about himself for a minute, before he decides that he’s kind of grateful that henri is gone. he wouldn’t know what to say, other than the obvious. and then he’s definitely glad he’s gone, when wilhelmina barges into his hotel room without warning. he’s dodged a bullet that morning, but he can’t help but feel like this is the start of something. 

and it is. 

“honey you are nothing to me but alcohol and dopamine. i’m dying on the sofa and i barely know the time like an old man, say i reckon, i love you for a millisecond, but i don’t wear a watch or rolex.” - track 005. presumably dead arm by sidney gish.

they meet again in mid-february at a coronation, and it’s the same song and dance. 

even if argentina is an entirely different type of place than paris, it’s still just a bit too lively for luca’s preferences. the events hosted in buenos aires are filled with dancing and parties that are just too much, but luca still attends, even if he hangs out in the corner for the entire night, watching the crowd move around him. it’s not out of some sense of duty he’s terrible at having, but because his siblings are yet again badgering him into “making new friends” and “coming out of his shell” like he’s some sort of shy schoolgirl. 

henri is having a marginally better time, if only because he’s got the ability to thrive in a social setting. light on his feet and giving with words he doesn’t actually mean make him a favorite for the people who want to dance, and he catches luca’s eye sometimes across the room and his chest will twist in a weird way that he can’t quite place. when he runs out of partners and people to talk to, he’ll check that same corner and find it empty, luca leaving the parties just before henri can go looking for him. 

on the last night of their trip, luca shows up on henri’s doorstep with a half smile and they fall into bed together yet again, this time with the ease of practiced lovers. and maybe it’s just a little bit too close to something he can’t take back, but when henri wakes the next morning luca is gone, his side of the bed cold. 

“but the light in the hallway and the silence in my room... said i don’t think i’ll get used to losing you.” - track 006. losing you by flyte.

luca goes back to luxembourg to an empty palace and he’s glad that his entire family is gone, his siblings taking his girls on a trip for that weekend. he lets himself wallow in pity for a day, asking all the questions that must be common for widowers who are trying to figure everything out alone. 

he sleeps in his twins’ empty room, unable to stand his own, the room still standing untouched. it’s a monument to his late wife, he can’t bring himself to even more things off her bedside table yet. it’s too fresh, even if it’s been an entire year. for a place that once was a sanctuary built by a woman who luca would have burned down the world for, it’s become something of a tomb. 

and then on sunday, he wakes and he finds that things are lighter, that he’s able to handle the grief. he can breathe in. he spends the afternoon in wilhelmina’s garden, away from the bustle of his siblings’ return. wren finds him there, hours later. 

“do you think she’d want me to... move on?” he asks, as if his youngest sibling will have any idea. he gets a shrug in reply, but wren still sits with him until it gets dark. and somehow that’s the push luca needed, that he can let go a little bit. that he can live without the shadow of his late wife watching over his every move. 

he thinks nathalie would be proud that he picked himself back up and did what he was meant to do. he knows that his sisters are. when his first valentine’s weekend alone is over, luca feels lighter than he has since the diagnosis, and it shows in his work, in the way he carries himself. 

he doesn’t lock himself away in the palace, instead he returns to engagement parties and balls held in honor of the dumbest things, and he does it with a bit more confidence, a little bit of a spring in his step. 

“and that’s the thing about illicit affairs and clandestine meetings and longing stares. they show their truth one single time, but they lie and they lie and they lie, a million little times.” - track 007. illicit affairs by taylor swift.

the first event back, they avoid each other for the first half of the weekend. but then henri can’t keep his eyes away, as luca carries a conversation instead of fading into the background. something’s different, something that henri can’t put his finger on but once he notices it’s terribly distracting. he can’t tear his eyes away. and when luca catches his stare across the room, and blushes just a little bit, it’s over. they’re right back to the start. 

in the spring of 2019, it becomes a habit. it seems like every royal event, they both end up as their country’s representative. whether it’s coincidence, fate or some sort of subconscious desire to see the other, there’s no way to tell, but they’re meeting eyes across ballrooms in japan and having conversations over cigars in botswana. 

in public, they simply read as two old friends. 

in private, they’re something more altogether.

they meet in hotel rooms and rented apartments, in europe and asia and one memorable time in new york city. 

after argentina, it’s always henri following luca to where he’s staying, and leaving before the morning comes. each time, though, luca starts to find that he wants more. he wants him to stay, but henri never does. 

and that should be enough of a sign, that this isn’t the same sort of thing for henri that it is for luca. 

but luca’s never been too good at reading the signs. 

“one last kiss i love you like an alcoholic. one last kiss, i love you like a stauette. one last kiss, i need you like a need a gaping head wound.” - track 008. i love you like an alcoholic by the taxpayers.

it’s may and they’ve been dancing around each other like this for months. they make their excuses and leave before the party’s end more often than not, check over their shoulders thousands of times to make sure no one will catch a glimpse of them. 

they keep it quiet because it’s the only option. luca isn’t looking for a scandal in a country still reeling from the death of it’s beloved queen, and henri isn’t looking to seem attached at all. 

they both say they’re getting what they want out of their meetings, but they’re not, really. they’re both too busy lying to themselves to realize that there’s a way that they can just reach out and have what they want. 

it all culminates in a few too many words said in the same apartment where it began, when luca’s drunken words become just a little bit too real. henri leaves and it feels different this time, like a nail in the coffin. 

luca wakes alone, but he’d been expecting it. 

he isn’t expecting his sisters to send guards to the apartment, to drag him back to the palace. 

he doesn’t expect the invasion. 

“hard feelings these are what they call hard feelings of love when the sweet words and fevers all leave us right here in the cold, oh oh.” - track 009. hard feelings/loveless by lorde.

it’s like a knife in his back, and he can’t even scream at him. henri disappears from his life into the night, just as easily as he’d entered it. luca rages when he’s alone, only allows himself to feel the loss of a lover, or even just a friend, when no one can see. he projects a strength he doesn’t have anymore, a mask that reminds him just a little bit too much of his father. he’s what his people need, for once. 

henri didn’t know, but who would believe him? he’s the one who left under the cover of the night while his own brother’s soldiers marched into the place he was running from. if he acts a little bit out of line when discussing it, it can be dismissed as being upset he’s been left out of the loop. if he hides away in his rooms for a few days, no one seems to read into it. 

when luca follows wilhelmina into the protection program, he only does so after figuring out that henri isn’t there. he’s not interested in seeing him ever again, to be honest. it’s easier that way, when he doesn’t have to worry about running into him randomly. he can prepare himself. 

the first event they both attend, luca manages to not look towards henri the entire night. it’s a win, a victory that he cannot believe he managed. he radiates calm only after hours of convincing himself everything will be alright, and only stays as long as he has to, trying to charm people who can help them out of their situation. 

henri can’t believe he misses catching luca’s gaze across a ballroom, but that little ache in his chest is something he refuses to feel again. he lets it go, tries his hardest to push everything out of his mind. it’s easier that way, he reminds himself. he couldn’t get attached, and even though he’s a little sad that the fun is over, it’s not the end of the world. 

both of them are liars, but they’ve managed to believe it.

when henri arrives in phuket, it’s to no fanfare. when a shouting match that he doesn’t want ensues, they both feel like they’re playing the part: henri as the villain and luca as the jilted lover. but yet again, the magnetism that pulls them together continues on. there’s no way they can avoid this. 

neither of them is going to make this easy. 

“cause if i had loved you the way you loved me before, or if you hadn't left me with this doubt creeping up my spine, maybe we could help this ” - track 011. getting on in spite of you by remember sports. 

[haikyuu-imvgines]

see me (bakugou katsuki x fem!reader)

this is an imagine i wrote, somewhat self-indulgent, i’ve been feeling really down so i decided to write a little angst based on some lyrics from the song francis forever by mitski. i don’t really write long scenarios, or scenarios in general, so it’s probably not that good, but regardless i hope you all enjoy <3

lyric inspo: i don’t know what to do without you. i’m writing this at 3 am. i don’t think i could stand to be where you don’t see me. i miss you more than anything.

word count: 1083

bakugou has always been independent, everyone knows that. but what he didn’t know was how heavy feelings for another person could be. especially when that other person refuses to acknowledge him now. 

the night kept replaying in his head as he lay in his bed, just trying to sleep when his thoughts are corrupted by you, and him, and how he probably messed things up for good. she didn’t understand how his emotions worked, and she didn’t have to, it isn’t her obligation to try and solve the mystery of why he just can’t seem to express his emotions. the harsh words he spouted at her that night are being screamed right back at him by his own mind, followed by the sounds of her crying and saying her own back before slamming the door and leaving; not taking a second glance back at him.

why did I have to be such a jerk? bakugou’s thoughts surrounded this topic, finally reaching the conclusion he’s been avoiding for the past few days. he is in love. and those harsh words only came out because he was too afraid of being vulnerable by sharing his true feelings. it’s currently three am, way too late for him to be thinking about things, but the night and quietness of the dorms is allowing him to finally confront himself and try to make things right. 

bakugou comes to the realization that it’s okay to let his guard down around you; you’ve never given him any reason to not feel comfortable, if anything you brought out the most in him, and when the two of you were alone he felt at peace, his mind getting to focus on you and how happy you made him. he just didn’t realize the feeling of love would come so soon, or so hard. it caught him off guard, and that terrified him. but now he’s facing that fear. 

after thinking for a little longer, he gets up and sits at his desk. as cliche as he thinks it is, he decides that writing his feelings down would be the easiest and best way to get them through to you. 

i miss you more than anything. i don’t know what to do without you. i don’t think i could stand to be where you don’t see me….

he continues writing all of the emotions he’s feeling, sharing details about him no one knows, not even his parents. shedding a few tears throughout the process, he doesn’t feel like himself, but his tough exterior has been long abandoned this night, he needs to face the truth. as he finishes, he folds the papers and puts them into an envelope with your nickname he gave you written on the front. he proceeds to your dorm and softly slides the envelope under your door, hoping that when you wake up you won’t recognize his handwriting and immediately throw it away- but he wouldn’t blame you if you did. 

little did bakugou know, you were also awake at such a late hour, sitting on your bed, mind drenched in the same thoughts. you jumped when you heard someone shuffling outside of your room, your eyes darting to the door where an envelope appeared on the ground. Waiting a few minutes to make sure the deliverer was gone, you got up and looked at the front. the moment you saw bakugou’s handwriting your heart swelled, then getting angry at yourself for being this love-struck about something he gave you after the nasty fight you two had. 

you slowly opened the envelope and took out the papers, sitting back down onto your bed. you read his letter over and over, crying each time at the parts where he shared his feelings towards you, and over the secrets you knew he hadn’t told anyone else because he could never say that out loud. you understood why he lashed out like he did, you were also beginning to feel those strong feelings towards him and was a little scared yourself. he’s kept everything bottled up, of course having such strong emotions suddenly come onto him would trigger an equally large response. 

accepting his feelings, and your own as well, you attempted to compose yourself before making your way to his dorm. you reached his door and knocked softly, in case he was asleep.

 bakugou was far from sleeping, he lays awake pondering anxiously over how you’ll take his message. when he hears the knock his heart practically jumped out of his chest. it had to be you, if it wasn’t that person was in for a rough time. he opened the door and tears began to form in his eyes again, seeing them gloss over yours as well. 

“katsuki… i-” you were cut off by him enveloping you into a tight hug, his soft crying making his shoulders move up and down slightly. he was overjoyed inside when you returned the hug, burying your face into his neck and placing one hand on the back of his neck. 

the two of you fell onto his bed, still embracing, him still crying, and you just holding him- letting him know that it’s okay and you aren’t going to judge him. he holds you tighter, and was finally able to speak after a few minutes of calming down.

 “i love you,” bakugou finally says, giving himself the confidence to express his feelings verbally, and letting you know that he is genuine. 

“i love you too, katsuki,” you say, burying your hands deeper into his hair as he pushes himself further into your neck. “please know that you can tell me anything, i’ll be here for you. always.”

you know that he has finally accepted your statement as truth when he looks up at you, still slightly teary-eyed, and pulls you in for a kiss. the two of you stay wrapped up in each other for the remainder of the night, laying in a comfortable silence, and talking about both of your feelings or anything else that comes up. bakugou wishes he could stay like this with you forever, but the sounds of the other students making their way around the dorms signals to both of you that it has to be halted to start the school day. no one questions you two talking again that day- bakugou seems more peaceful than usual and you seem content. 

he knows that you see him now, and he can see you back, more than ever before. 

[urflowersdied]

here comes the rain again

In which Harry spends an evening out in Tokyo and his melodramatic thoughts spiral out of control.

A/N: I was listening to Here Comes The Rain Again by Eurythmics, Nightcall by Kavinsky and Come Into the Water by Mitski on repeat and this just kinda… happened. It probably also didn’t help that we got pictures of Harry walking around in Japan. This is just a tiny blurb, around 1,1k words, but I really wanted to write this idea down. I would also strongly suggest listening to the Eurythmics song while reading!

Hope you enjoy!

He hadn’t really wanted to come out tonight. The rain was falling in a drizzle, dampening the streets of Tokyo and simultaneously his mood. These feelings inside of him surfaced any time the clouds would break open, really. Maybe it had something to do with being an artist, a writer. Or maybe it was just the way his melodramatic brain was wired, making use of the gloominess that rain provided to indulge in his emotions.

Nevertheless, his friends would hear none of his complaints and dismissals, basically forcing him to accompany them to dinner and whichever other activities they would get up to during the course of the evening. The fact fans knew of his whereabouts and were aimlessly walking around the Japanese city to catch a glimpse of him not deterring them one bit. Harry loved his fans, was thankful for just about everything they had helped him achieved and the support that they granted him, and most of the ones he had recently ran into had been nothing but respectful, but he simply didn’t feel like dealing with attention tonight. So before leaving the flat he was occupying during his time here he hid his recognisable mane under a black beanie and silently asked any available higher powers to make him blend into the crowds unnoticed.

Their dinner went over without a hitch. Not even the restaurant staff had batted an eyelid while tending to their table, which made Harry relax significantly. Conversation had been made about everything and nothing - whether any of them had upcoming projects, if they had already binged the tv show that was in everyone’s to-watch-list or which person in the room was sporting the best outfit. Drinks were consumed, bellies were filled, laughs were shared. The melancholy that had wrapped itself in knots around Harry’s bones slowly began to untangle.

Not soon after, his friends successfully managed to drag him into the next karaoke bar they laid their eyes upon. He himself constantly refused to take a place at the centre of the stage whenever he found himself in the vicinity of a karaoke machine, but thoroughly enjoyed sitting back and listening to people joyfully singing their little hearts out. Knew the feeling of adrenaline it could spark in people. How your nerves were at the highest level they could be beforehand, nearly making you walk out of the building instead of towards the microphone, but how once it’s done you are left itching to do it a multitude of times over again.

Upon entering, Harry had a sort of deja-vu. Some memory unlodging from the depths of his brain, making him aware that he had been here before. He hadn’t enjoyed himself that time, a few years back. The tables and the stage positioned right in front of them, which had previously been illuminated in red neon light, were now drenched in a strange mixture of blues and purples. While his friends ordered drinks after drinks, taking turns from belting out some chart classics or even unknown songs, Harry took on the role of a silent, contemplative observer. He felt weirdly uncomfortable. The room was sticky and he found it rather hard to breathe. Did the owner allow people to smoke inside? Was this not an extreme fire hazard?

“Konbanwa. Hope you’re all having a great evening.” As if struck by lightning, Harry’s skin erupted into goosebumps. Turning away from the conversation his table was carrying - he could pretend to be listening all he wanted, his friends knew that he was a lost cause tonight -, his line of sight moved towards the stage. He hadn’t noticed anyone getting up from their seat to get ready for their performance, but what was previously empty space was now occupied by the most intoxicating voice that had ever graced his eardrums.

Harry had to suppress a chuckle for the first time that evening, the song choice of this person being a little too close to his emotional musings for comfort. During their rendition of Here Comes The Rain Again he couldn’t take his eyes off of them. And while the swing of their hips, the glint in their eyes and curve of their lips was extremely enticing to him, he figured it was the aura surrounding them that kept his attention. Warm and welcoming, yet also containing an incredible distance that made it easy for him to project his personal musings onto them.

Visions of the two of them wandering through the damp streets of Tokyo were created inside his mind, their faces lit up by the advertising signs that made it possible to see in the darkness. Hands touching each other timidly, glances being shared that said more than a thousand words ever could.

The sultry tone of their voice calmed him and put him on edge simultaneously. It seemed as though the universe had decided to indulge him in his mood, presenting him someone to focus all his melodramatic desires on a silver platter. The light Harry had previously considered strange now served as a wonderful accompaniment to the mysterious-sounding song the object of his affection for the night had chosen. Harry’s fingertips itched for pen and paper, or even his phone. It seemed uncanny to him, how deeply affected he felt by this quite ordinary situation.

He decided then and there, while the music was nearing its end, that it was time to bring the night to an end. Even though he was absolutely enthralled, he had no intentions of crossing the line between the fantasy he had conjured up in the shortest amount of time and the real person he would encounter.Tonight was not the occasion for new encounters, he decided. After he bid his friends goodbye he spared the person on the stage, who was now quietly muttering “arigato” in response to the claps of the audience, he exited the karaoke bar and made his way back to his temporary flat in Tokyo.

And if he spent the rest of the night tossing and turning in his bed, not being able to stop the constant flow of imagined scenarios, only being able to fall into slumber once the first few rays of light graced the sky again, then that would be his secret to keep.

[sontagfag]

a song by song explanation for this playlist

1. Shut Up Kiss Me by Angel Olsen

this screams macdennis to me, like just read guardians of a rare thing and you’ll get it. this is like s6 or s7 dennis bc they stopped fucking after s5 and he just wants to get kissed because he has big feelings but also refuses to say them out loud :( 

most macdennis line: “this heart still beats for you why can’t you see it”

2. I’m Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You by Black Kids

ok so this is dennis being jealous as fuck because mac got a boyfriend and now he’s hanging out at the bar being tender w mac. dennis is the narrator and can’t stand watching them be together + the guy knows mac and him are close and asks him for advice....

most macdennis line: “one, im biting my tongue, two, he’s kissing on you, three, oh why can’t you see”

3. Green Light by Lorde

ok so this one’s about right after mac comes out and starts going to gay bars and so dennis tags along and watches him get hit on and gets super jealous so he just dances w him and kisses him but then pretends it didn’t happen....

most macdennis line: “did it frighten you/how we kissed on the light-up floor?”

4. Bastards of Youth by The Replacement

this is a young macdennis song, about when they were just starting to be friends and yknow they both have shitty home lives so they just sit around and get high and complain about their family in one of their basements and talk about opening a bar one day...

most macdennis line: “the ones who love us least are the ones we'll die to please/ if it's any consolation, I don't begin to understand them”

5. I’m Scum by IDLES

ok this song is basically just on here because dennis is a bastard man with no rights, but actually this could just be the paddy’s theme song? while it does have a lefty twist which is probably inappropriate for paddy’s, like, dennis is a bastard man and i just wanna put this one on for him and say to him “you have no rights go be gay you dumb fuck”

most macdennis line: “i’m a minimum wage job/ i’m a mongrel dog/i’m just another cunt/i’m scum, i’m scum”

6. I’m Beating My Head Against the Wall by Jeff Rosenstock

this one is just about both of them being dumbasses who cannot communicate whatsoever, pretty straightforward.

most macdennis line: “talk-talk-talk-talk-talking to you but you don’t wanna hear me speak”

7. Something Soon by Car Seat Headrest

this is a dennis post s12 song about being in north dakota and missing mac...he’s in a foreign place and he doesn’t know anyone except mandy and he’s trying to get a job but he can’t stop thinking about mac....like “only one change of clothes” sounds like someone who just decided to pick up and move to another state...there are so many good dennis lines in this like just listen to it

most macdennis line: “biting my clothes to keep from screaming/taking pills to keep from dreaming”

8. Your Dog by Soccer Mommy

ok, finally one from mac’s perspective! this is him being mad at dennis because he manipulates him all the time and whenever dennis explodes he has to clean up the mess... essentially just the scene from The Gang Dines Out where he says “say something nice to me for once in your life”

most macdennis line: “always talk to other people/ dart my eyes across the room/ forehead kisses break my knees and/ leave me crawling back to you

9. I Must Not Think Bad Thoughts by X

oh this is just pure mac repressed catholic guilt....he loves dennis but he knows he shouldn’t :(

most macdennis line: “walking down the road/ everybody yelling ‘hurry up, hurry up’/ but i’m waiting for you/ i must go slow/ i must not think bad thoughts”

10. Not in Love We’re Just High by Unknown Mortal Orchestra

absolutely about how dennis and mac compartmentalize hooking up when they were high and in high school...poor lil boys

most macdennis line: “songs we started left me broken-hearted/ i have been frozen in time, yeah/ roses on your mind/ will call you home”

11. Should Have Known Better by Sufjan Stevens

this is dennis beating himself up and honestly probably self-harming after doing something dumb to upset mac. he’s too fucking repressed to actually deal with his trauma so of course whenever he upsets mac and they stop talking it reminds him of his parents abusing him when he was young and him crying alone in his room...it’s also about him trying to explain to mac how he has no feelings (ALLEGEDLY) and hasn’t ever since childhood...

most macdennis line: “i should have known better/ nothing can be changed/ the past is still the past/ bridge to nowhere/ i should have wrote a letter/ explaining what i feel, that empty feeling”

12. Old Friend by Mitski

OKAY I HAVE A WHOLE SITUATION FOR THIS ONE. this is like beginning of s13, for one there’s line “we nearly drowned for such a silly thing” which, uh, i know is not literal but THE GANG GOES TO HELL YOU BITCHES. anyway this is exactly like one macdennis fic i read where dennis comes back and mac is dating rex and he’s really jealous but anyway this is them going to a diner and discussing everything that’s happened since he’s left... i can’t remember what fic it is so please help me but there’s an iconic line where mac says “it was always you” to dennis...im feral...

most macdennis line: “i’ll take coffee and talk about nothing baby/ at blue diner i’ll take anything you wanna give me, baby”

13. Doll Parts by Hole

fuck you, dennis absolutely loved Hole in high school because dee bought Live Through This on cd once on a whim and got obsessed and would always listen to it when he was in a crappy mood bc abusive parents though he would never admit it to anyone else...like this is just pure mentally ill dennis self-hatred, and now even tho he’s an adult whenever he is just jumping out of his skin he puts it on alone in the range rover and screams along with courtney love...also it’s about him loving mac so much but because he’s him it just comes out in intense outbursts of anger... 

most macdennis line: “i love him so much it just turns to hate/ i fake it so real, i am beyond fake”

ok i realized that most of these are from dennis’s perspective but like, he’s so easy to pin....dumb bastard man...anyway thank you for reading

[themaresnest-dumblr]

Further to the last post, got the following reply from shvkespearc (who of course would not allow a reply to the reply, but oh well ...):

Hi!! It's op!!! The artist/band choices were not meant to be specifically vampire-themed, just as the "pick a floral pattern" question was not specifically vampire-themed. HOWEVER, I would like to say that any of them could have big vampire energy. Genuinely... any song can have vampire energy if you can be creative. A song by Patti Smith inspired my vampire novel I first drafted last year. Joy Division is what I listened on repeat while drafting it. Florence + The Machine and Evanescence fueled my vampire obsession in middle school.

They weren’t ‘vampire themed’ but they have ‘vampire energy’?

Right. So because you somehow found vampire vibes in things with tenuous/non-existent links to vampires, that means they have ‘vampire energy’?

Sorry but that’s just as silly as the ‘everything’s Queer’ line doing the rounds of the zeitgeist where those into a certain thing start appropriating everything else they like as somehow being part of it.

It’s irrational to decide x = y and then look around for evidence to ‘prove’ it - sheer Margaret Murray levels of disingenuity.

Also Evanescence isn't a Christian rock band but that's for another post.

Evanescence were most certainly a Christian Goth band in their brief turn of the century heyday - indeed without the Terrified Of Anything To Do With Sex Born Again teens crowd it’s debatable they’d have come to mainstream notice.

That they junked it from expediency (and criticism) is neither here nor there (although very twenty first century of them ... ho hum ...)

I'm REALLY confused on how one would not think Chelsea Wolfe has stereotypical vampire energy. From her acoustic tracks to her doom tracks, her entire style is ominous, creepy, unsettling, and most of all, gothic. Which like... these are stereotypical vampire descriptors. (ALSO HAVE YOU SEEN HER? SHE LOOKS LIKE A VAMPIRE BUT I DIGRESS)

Chelsea Wolfe doesn’t look like a vampire, she looks like someone who tried putting on their make up whilst riding your average British train on any track outside of the commuter belt.

In other words Robert Smith style - who is only vampire chic in the eyes of the German producers of ‘The Littlest Vampire’ TV series, who chose that because Candystripe Goth is regarded as unthreatening and safe for under teens (and because German TV is terrified of anything dark and sinister lest it be accused of Nazi overtones).

I assume you didn't realize I could see all of this immediately--or at least I hope not, because I'd hope you would've been more polite and less weirdly aggressive for no reason about my vampire quiz on tumblr.com.

Of course we realised you’d see it - that’s the whole point of posting replies - including the tags. And if you thought that was being ‘aggressive’ ... ‘sheltered life’ doesn’t even begin to cover it.

For the love of plumbob, what is it with today’s yoof, where the slightest dissent to their world view leaves them ‘triggered’ and rushing to the psychologist, pills and a f**king ‘support labrador’. No wonder ISIS, Mad Vlad, North Korea, ‘The People’s Republic Of Routine Mass Genocide’, etc. thinks westerners are total pushovers and act accordingly ...

And these are the ones who will take over the world when we’re old and sick and promising to finish the job of ending climate change, etc. Jeez, may as well get that cyanide pill ready folks ‘gainst the day these spineless ninnies take over - we’re doomed!

ANYWAY: for anyone else reading this, enjoy some vampire-themed musical recommendations by yours truly!

Liquid Smooth - Mitski

Shadowplay - Joy Division

16 Psyche - Chelsea Wolfe

Dream Girl Evil ; My Best Dress ; Moderation - Florence + The Machine (extra songs for the WTF!)

Gloria: In Excelsis Deo - Patti Smith

Tourniquet - Evanescence (The song that probably got them thought of by some as Christian rock due to its Christianity-influenced lyrics written by Amy Lee, a Christian. But also, actually, a considerable amount of vampire energy! Perhaps ESPECIALLY due to the religious lyrics!)

In fact, I've packaged them into a playlist!

On Spotify.

The charge sheet just keeps growing, doesn’t it?

There is a special place in Hell for people who mislabel music and culture as ‘vampire’ when it is nothing of the kind, one where the condemned are strapped to chairs in the same fashion as Malcolm McDowell in ‘A Clockwork Orange’ and are forced to watch endless reruns of ‘The Drak Pack’ and ‘The Groovie Ghoulies’ until the Day of Judgement.

And you can be sure that f**ker Harriet Muncaster will be one of them.