#//I can't believe this blog is actually seeing activity

[crownedwille]

Are there still Crown Prince!Wilhelm stans out there despite S3 turning it into the number one problem? Please report, we need to unite and no, that doesn't mean that I don't support Wille's mental health and happiness and that I love the monarchy, some people out there must get it

[pixxyofice]

🏰 cursinguponcastles

of course i manage to grab everything EXCEPT for my anxiety medications. they're still stuck there!! in the House!!! every night I worry my friends are going to leave me for asking them to come along and some part of my brain is like "you wouldn't be worrying if you had taken your meds" and I have to then tell my brain the meds. ARE NOT WITH ME!!!

(this post is unrebloggable.)

-

(anon) asked:

plum? how have you been running this blog without anxiety meds?

🏰 cursinguponcastles replied:

Um! How did you know I didn't have my anxiety meds??

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(anon) asked:

Don't the Houses keep stuff, like, forever? I'm sure if you go back to that House you'll be able to get your meds back. Unless it's like, frozen or something?

🏰 cursinguponcastles replied:

Oh. Ohhhh. Well, um! I am going back to get them! They're back in Dormont! I just won't be focused on getting my meds when I'm there, you know??

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🎗 ribbpeat reblogged from 🍑 yetanotherfinepeach

🍑 yetanotherfinepeach

so was anyone going to tell me the savior of vaugarde runs a horror blog account or was I supposed to just find that out from her APPARENTLY LEAVING HER MEDS IN THE CENTER FREEZING POINT

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🍙 chateau-riceballs reblogged from 🧦 socks-to-be

🍯 lovelyhoney-truths

and just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, the savior of vaugarde turns out to be a tumblr user

🛴 offowchmy-nkee

and this is bad... how?

🍯 lovelyhoney-truths

How is this not obvious to you people? She's on tumblr. She's been ACTIVE. Instead of doing her job of saving us she's been giggling about her little vaugarde boys getting eaten. I'm sitting here typing with one arm waiting for vaugarde to be saved, and she's wasting time reading. Boo-hoo she left her anxiety meds in the House where the King is freezing all of us from. Actually, wait! Why didn't she just turn around and take him out? If she's supposed to save vaugarde, assigned to, and she was close to its starting point, why the hell did she walk the other direction and faff about?! Some Savior she is! Most of the country is frozen because of her! And instead of just shutting up and doing her job she went on a funny little pilgrimage. I'm not calling her a Savior anymore. 

🐱 ChangeGirlClaws

do you know about the existence of paragraph breaks. Like at all.

🎀 darts-chatting-blogg

Instead of looking at... all of that, apparently not everybody knows this so look at this.

THE DOORS OF DORMONT GOT LOCKED BY THE KING AND THE SAVIORS HAVE TO FIND FIVE ORBS TO BE ABLE TO EVEN TRY TO SAVE US. And in case you don't know, Vaugarde is huge! The saviors passed by my place a week ago and they only had four Orbs then.

I think Plum and her friends are making good progress, actually! I think she's allowed to relieve stress by reading about guts and gore, actually.

🍙 chateau-riceballs

she's what

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🐝 finalgirl-standing reblogged from 🐮 The-Cointry-of-Voigarde

🍯 lovelyhoney-truths

Not only does that orb bullshit sound made up and stupid, but apparently Plum also runs a guts and gore blog??? what the fuck is wrong with her. Has she Changed to be so disgusting when she should be Changing herself to be able to save the country?? Do you guys really believe that shit? I haven't heard of a House where Orbs lock the gates, that's clearly her making up excuses for why she can't just go there and beat him. How can her friends stand to be with her when she's this irresponsible?

🎀 darts-chatting-blogg

One. The King warped the place (see image here!) and Dormont was known for experimenting with locks. People just be saying crab, I guess.

Two. Defenders. Get their asses. I'll start.

C

🎗 ribbpeat

R

🍑 yetanotherfinepeach

A

🛴 offowchmy-nkee

B

🐱 ChangeGirlClaws

P

🍙 chateau-riceballs

O

🦴 justanotherchange-blog

W

⚓️ insertcreativebloghere

P

🧦 socks-to-be

E

🐮 The-Cointry-of-Voigarde

N

🐝 finalgirl-standing

I

(this post is unrebloggable.)

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⚓️ insertcreativebloghere reblogged from 🦴 justanotherchange-blog

🦴 justanotherchange-blog

if I was on a journey to save the country and I forgot my focusing meds at home I would just forget everything. Honestly, Plum's doing much better than I am???

⚓️ insertcreativebloghere

If i had to save the country without my meds i would've thrown myself into the sea

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🐮 The-Cointry-of-Voigarde

(a picture of the countryside. Half of it is frozen, and the other half isn't)

Well. It was an honor, everyone. I'm glad to have contributed to the crab pow.

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🏰 cursinguponcastles reblogged 🐧 penguin-do-be-writing

🐧 penguin-do-be-writing

hi everyone, sorry for the silence! My family has been loudly debating what to do about the freezing country, I think i touched something weird and my feet have stopped working for me, so it's hard to get to my writing desk. whoops! it's been a struggle to get words written down. Don't worry, though! I've got a chapter for everyone! This time, things get INTENSE. That internal organs being not internal warning was for a reason!

🏰 cursinguponcastles

CHANGE, THIS WAS SO GOOD!! I'm really sorry you're close to being frozen, but I could see how it affected how you wrote Dembélé struggling to get away! It felt too real, haha!!

I'll miss your fics! I, well, hopefully, will see you in a few months!!

[hughiecampbelle]

The Boys Preference: Dying Of The Supe Virus

Requested: Hi!! I wanted to request a preference for the boys + homelander reaction if R was dying from supe virus... I love your blog, thank you ♥️♥️♥️♥️ - anon

A/N: I kinda took it in two directions, either actively dying or already dead. I think some perspectives just worked better that way! I really hope you like it my love! Feedback is always appreciated 💜💜💜

Butcher pretends it didn't matter to him, but he definitely blames himself. It might've been Sameer who shot you up with the virus, but it was him who put you in charge of him. It was Billy who thought to put a Supe in charge of the only thing in the world that could kill you. When Frenchie breaks the news, Kimiko carrying your body in, he feels like he's going to be sick. He was the one who was dying. It should have been him. He tries to help the team move on, focus, and orders Frenchie to extract the virus from your body, but underneath he's broken. He didn't trust or like a lot of Supes, the majority actually, but you were different. You were close, whether or not he could admit to it. There was nothing he could do to save you. He couldn't turn back time, he couldn't prevent this. He looks like he's moved on, but Butcher feels stuck in the moment, watching your face, waiting for you to laugh and tell him it was just another sick joke.

Hughie laughs. He's hysterical. The ridiculousness of it all, of the situation. You? Dead? You couldn't die. You walked away from a bullet between your eyes with a smile. You made moving on from death look easy. Effortless. He's afraid to touch you, to look at you. He truly believes, for a moment, that that's not you. Your features are bubbled and blistered, but he recognizes your hands. Hughie backs away, stifling a laugh, escaping to the bathroom where he throws up. Annie tries to go after him, but M. M. stops her. He smiles despite himself, crying and laughing, unable to control himself. He already lost his dad. He couldn't lose you, too. Like M.M. he feels like an idiot, selfish even. He never imagined a world where you could be killed. He never thought he'd have to worry about you. Now you weren't just hurt, you were dead. Murdered. He can't accept it. You didn't deserve to suffer the way you did. You didn't deserve to die. Hughie is a mix between denial and hysteria.

Annie is overwhelmed with despair and depression. You've known her since the beginning. You were the first person she ever became close to in NYC. Now you were gone. She throws herself into your funeral arrangements, practically biting the head off anyone who tries to interrupt her or make her take a break. When she's not staying up until the early morning trying to make the memorial perfect, she's sobbing behind closed doors. She tries to keep herself composed as much as possible, but everyone can see the mask slipping. Cracking. Her eyes are permanently black from mascara running. She's not eating or sleeping. When Butcher says to extract the virus from your body, she goes postal. She calls him cruel and heartless and pathetic. She can't help it. Your body is barely cold and he's still thinking about taking down Homelander. It was inhumane.

M.M. is angry. Angry at Frenchie and Kimiko (he knows it isn't fair, but he just can't help it), angry at you, and angry at himself. He got too close to you. You were a Supe, after all. The very thing he vowed to hate. And then you showed up, and he started to care about you despite himself. And now you're gone. He feels like in idiot. He thought you were bulletproof. Literally. He never once had to worry about you or think about what would happen if you passed. It never crossed his mind. He was constantly worrying and fixating on everyone else, but you would always be okay. His OCD gets so much worse in response to his grief. Everything must be done in threes. The burners, the locks, everything must be checked three times. Everyone starts to worry the more out of control his rituals become. His panic attacks, too, get worse. Less manageable. Every time he thinks about you, what happened to you, he feels like his heart will pound out of his chest.

Frenchie is deeply in denial. He was so busy bickering and then making up with Kimiko that he hadn't realized Sameer had broken free. You were the first to jump at the chance to stop him, and that's what got you killed. The needle plunged into your ankle. He couldn't stop it. He couldn't cut off your limb. Your Supe abilities didn't work like that. The blisters bubbled fast, moving up your leg to your torso, your chest. You clawed at your neck, crying out, unable to form words. Frenchie begged and prayed, but it wasn't stopping. He had to break the news about your death. He definitely blames himself. If he had been paying more attention. If he had been the one to react instead of you. Even though he watched you die, he's still in denial. He can't accept it and thinks you'll be back in no time. He gets angry when you don't call or text and is intensely lonely because he's expecting you to reach out. He just can't wrap his head around it and absolutely hates that Annie's planning your funeral. You were fine. Why did you need a funeral for someone who was perfectly fine?

Kimiko blames herself, too. If she'd been the one to get the virus, if she'd been the one injected, they could have stopped it. They could have moved on. Instead, she sat beside you, unblinking, unmoving, stroking your arm. Even as Frenchie extracts the virus from your body, your blood, she doesn't let go of you. M.M. and Annie urge her to sleep and eat (though they're both doing little of that themselves), but she can't move from you. When she does sleep, it's with her head beside you. Everyone knows you only have so much time before your body starts to decompose. They want to give her as much time as she needs, but they're also working against the clock. She definitely reacts like after Kenji was killed, crawling and hiding under tables, unresponsive with her usual kindness. She's cold, cagey, spiky. There's no reaching her when she's like this. They have to let her be. Let her grieve. Eventually she'll find her way back.

Bonus! Homelander thinks everyone's lying. Ashley breaks the news to him, petrified and sweating. Something, a virus or bug or whatever, killed you. Because The Boys still needed your body, they mailed pictures of you to the Vought Tower addressed to Ashley. He looks through them, and though she tells him they're not fake, he orders them to check again. He holds on to one, unable to look away. When they tell him that yes, definitively, they are real, he orders everyone out. He goes to his floor and destroys everything. Everything is a mess. He hasn't cried like this in years, decades even. Uncontrollable sobbing, caressing your picture. You were the only one he ever really cared about. Now you were dead because of those asssholes. He doesn't come up with a strategy or plan. He will search the entire world until he has Butchers head on a platter. Until that whole fucking group is torn limb by limb.

[azmstea]

[COSMO - RARE TWISTED]

Okey, I KNOW some people already made this idea (found out while I was working on this), but I really wanted to make my version of it so let's go!!

Well, I decided to rework a bit Twisted Cosmo because I personally never understood why he is a common one to begin with. And also explain how his ability would work!

This will be a PRETTY long blog with a lot of yapping, so if you're actually interested in the "AU", keep reading!!

ASKS ABOUT HIM ARE HIGHLY APPRECIATED!!

Alright, let's start by explaining a bit about him.

"He believes he's helping others, but his healing method doesn't work like before. This twisted, separated from his best friend, walks around looking for people to heal with hearts that block any healing items and causing random effects for a few seconds. Be sure to never be spotted without full health!" - Research description.

During a blackout, Cosmo got lost and was forced to separate from his best friend Sprout and had only one heart left by the end of the process. When arriving at the elevator, he noticed Sprout having a hard time with a twisted, and he also had one heart. Knowing that his stamina was low at the moment, Cosmo does something he never did before: He used all his strength to remove his last heart and give it to Sprout, saving him from a fatal attack. Sprout made it to the elevator, but Cosmo couldn't say the same. (I want my Fruitcake angst y'all, or else I'll cook it)

We aren't sure how exactly toons became Twisteds, but for the sake of this "AU", Dandy decided to use Cosmo as a way to test something new: An ichor heart in a non main character toon. This heart made Cosmo stop from dying, but it causes him A LOT of pain, since his chest is opened and the ichor causes physical pain. He still has some conscience inside of him, but the ichor stops him from acting like how he used to and makes it more difficult to talk. His body and head are full of bites, like the twisted that was haunting Sprout tried to eat him before. His arm is way bigger and heavier than before, but he doesn't mind much because he is pretty strong around his arms, but it surely brings some extra pain for his right side.

Deep down, he just wants to help other toons, but he can't realize how he isn't capable of doing it in a positive way anymore thanks to the ichor.

Yes, I know, only main characters have sounds to show that they're nearby, but I want to add that if Cosmo is extremely close of you (in the same room or in the next room), you're capable of hearing his ichor heart beats, which are fast and loud. Like this, players can escape from him in case they are in a dangerous situation.

ABILITY:

(I saw a video called "swap au" on YouTube and took a bit of inspiration from it, but I changed it to make it a little more interesting!)

Twisted Cosmo's ability is inspired in his Toon's active: Heal others, but with a reverse effect.

If you have all your hearts, Cosmo won't follow you or harm you, he will keep walking because he doesn't want to hurt anyone (something like Glisten) and because he knows you won't need any heals. At first, it's like he won't even do anything at all.

However, if he sees you with 2 hearts or only 1 heart, he will grab his ichor heart from his chest and start chasing you, with the intention of throwing a heart at you and "help". His attention spam is a little longer (3.5 s) and his speed increases from his canon twisted form, but his eye vision isn't the best since he doesn't have one of his eyes, so he can't see you from extreme distances like Shrimpo.

If he catches you, your empty heart slots will be filled with a weird "ichor heart", similar to main characters. As his description says, the heart will block any kind of healing, so things like Teagan's active, medkits and bandaids won't work at all. Along with that, you'll get a random effect for 10 seconds from the I category (like "Confused I", "Slow I", "Tired I"). After the attack, Cosmo will no longer follow you because he thinks he finished his job there. (Distractors you're all screwed🔥)

And plus, you can avoid his attack if you heal yourself BEFORE he can heal you.

Another ability of his is being able to know when and where a player got hurt. Let's say you have 3 hearts, but you got a hit from Shelly in "x" spot. In this scenario, Cosmo will immediately go to "x" spot no matter how far he is from the place. If you manage to leave where you were before he arrives, good! If not, Cosmo will chase you to give you an ichor heart. Sounds "inoffensive" at first, but depending of the situation, it can make your life pure hell.

If you have 1 regular heart and 2 ichor hearts, Cosmo will no longer care about you during that floor because it's impossible to get another hit without dying, leaving you in a vulnerable situation for any complicated twisteds like Pebble or Goob. That's why I like to call him the very first twisted that won't kill you directly! I wanted to play with the fact that he's a supporter as a toon, so why not make a "supporter" twisted whose job is make your gameplay harder?? Maybe a new type of twisted?

"Will Cosmo also follow you if all machines are done like Glisten?" I'm still unsure of it, but to keep his "support" role, I suppose he would just accept his fate of being alone, because at least he can "help" others. (I WANT FRUITCAKE ANGST!!!)

How do you remove the ichor hearts? Again, still thinking about it, but just like Shelly's "Confused" ability, the effect should be gone once you reach the elevator. I thought about leaving the effect for 2 floors, but I dunno if this would be too OP or anything, so you can decide on this!

Now congratulations! You know who is twisted Cosmo and how to survive to one of the most annoying Twisteds ever!! /jk

I suppose that's all for now about him! He's still in development, but this is the main idea of him and his abilities!

And don't worry, I will be sure to cook some good old angst with this concept. Hope everyone enjoys it!!

ASKS ABOUT HIM ARE HIGHLY APPRECIATED!!

[lukolabrainrot]

Calm theory anon here.. I've been busy with life but I checked in and I want to share some thoughts I have been having. Pictures are just a moment in time. I can look at a picture and think wow this couple really looks happy and you can look at a picture and say 0h wow there is sadness in their eyes I wonder what happened. People interpret differently and that's the beauty of everybody having their own mind. So you've seen a lot of photos, right with Nicola and Luke this summer. And we've seen twice now where people have misinterpreted situations. One pate gate people assumed that Luke didn't mind the photos, and that was due to the pictures we got. Later on someone put the photos together and a different story was told. Another circumstance the Nicola and JD picture we didn't get the photos in order and what happened assumed that she was just hugging him. As More pictures dropped we seen that they were actually taking a photo together. That's two times now that we've misinterpreted a photo. And that's fine because we all say this is theory. No one knows what actively going on. Not any of these big creators on Tumblr not any of these big creators on TikTok not any of these big creators on Instagram not any of these creators on Twitter. Not one of these people actively know Luke or Nic. All they're doing is taking a set of photos and likes and assuming situations. But as we've already established, there is something called misinterpretation. so anything you see or read can be a product of misinterpretation. Guys feelings and love aren't easy things to understand. Think about the last time you were in love. I was so confused and the feelings were scary. It was the best and hardest thing I ever dealt with. But imagine someone from the outside that doesn't know you trying to understand your feelings for each other. That's just impossible. Luke and Nic are people. They are dealing with feelings most of us have never dealt with seeing as I believe they are soul mates. I truly feel they will find their way.

💯

Ok I am going to say a few things, and I know my comments are going to blow up probably, but I need to get this off my chest:

Me, and NONE of the other creators on SM, actually know L and N, or any of the people in their lives. We are all coming to our own interpretation based on PUBLICLY AVAILABLE INFORMATION. None of us have some special inside scoop into L or N's life, and no one should take our word as gospel! I share my opinions on what I am seeing, but I can't definitively say what is going on BTS, or predict the future. I think because we have a lot more questions than answers, we just want to know what is going on BTS. But we are never going to know that full story, and we have to be okay with that. We need to just let them cook, and see what happens.

I have mentioned this multiple times, but my background is in psychology and studying human behavior. I have also mentioned how ~70%-90% of human communication is non verbal. And L/N's non verbal cues speak VOLUMES and is the reason a lot of us are still here. I've talked about this a LOT on here, so feel free to scroll through my page and see my thoughts.

But it was all PR, right?? It wasn't. IMPOSSIBLE. The end.

I try to look at the FULL picture of ALL the publicly available information I have before coming to my interpretation. Yes, I have had a few little freak out moments, but I try not to fixate on a single moment in time, or a single post or interaction on SM. I try to look at everything in context of the bigger picture. And if you look at the larger picture, a lot of the information is pointing to L/N being a lot closer to getting together and going public at some point in the near future. This is my opinion though of course, and it is alright if some of you don't share my opinion.

I think a major reason I decided to start this blog is because I was having a lot of thoughts that I wanted to share around L/N and try and put a psychological lens on what might be going on BTS and what we saw during the PR tour. Another reason I started the blog though is because I have NEVER seen a connection like L/N, or seen people respond so positively to two people just interacting with each other. I am a VERY jaded person, and do not think super highly of the human species. I also have never believed in soulmates, but L/N are the closest example I have ever seen in my life. Yes I don't know them. And yes, I KNOW it sounds sappy. Trust me. I NEVER thought I would end up here today shipping two celebrities I have never met. But watching the way these two publicly interact almost felt like I had run into a unicorn or fairy in the wild. And by THAT I mean this. It is SO rare to see two people publicly show their affection and love for each other the way L/N do. Humans aren't great at it. Period. So I think we fell in love with the way they love each other (at least I know I did) because it is so rare to see, and makes us a little more hopeful. And that, and ALL the other publicly available information I have seen, is why I am firmly sat. I want to see how this movie ends, because I feel like when the PR tour ended, the movie stopped partway.

Lastly, if you do not ship Lukola, MY BLOG IS NOT FOR YOU. Also, if you find yourself spiraling over every new piece of information, this shipping space is probably not the healthiest thing for you. I feel like ultimately, shipping should be fun and not taken too seriously since we're just fans and we don't actually know these people. If you find that you are getting really stressed and not having a lot of fun anymore, it is definitely valid to take a step back. And it is fine if you have a different opinion than me or someone in the comments, BUT PLEASE BE RESPECTFUL. I am going to start blocking more people who are trolling in the comments. Ya ain't slick, people can see you 👀

[autisticrosewilson]

Hello to the one blog I've been loving to read for the past few days :) <3

Just wanted to add a little something that I started thinking abt after reading a few of your really cool posts, I think we should also discuss abt how Bruce's argument abt killing (with Jay) are often framed with "you're not the judge, jury & the executioner" which is really telling of who he thinks can exersise this legitimately? ? ?

I think it'd be constructive to actually properly discuss this aspect of Bruce's philosophy too. Plus, we get more nuanced Bruce characterisation. (Also keeping in mind uh... comic book propaganda of the writers and DC themselves)

YES ABSOLUTELY! Like what if someone is given a death sentence by a court of law? Does Bruce still care? I'm sure most writers would tell you no because Bruce has become a cop allegory. He's a violent enforcer of the law, and he seeks to uphold the law. Which is a recent switch! Batman comics used to be more radical, but now they're being written by old white men. So it's another one of those things where you can ignore it for your PERSONAL INTERPRETATION but you can't say that it's not A Thing because it's been like this for at least a decade.

His argument would likely be that everyone deserves a fair trial, that everyone has the right to be seen in court. Something which I do think Jason would agree with because when he's being written well he's not just shooting petty criminals! Jason's stance comes in with the big players, the disgustingly rich or well connected upper class who get away with murder. This has been true since the Garzonas case, the whole point was that Felipe was virtually immune to the law, and Jason couldn't allow that.

I think what it comes down to is whether they believe in reformative justice or punitive Justice, and I can most assuredly say that Batman believes in the latter. You can argue that Bruce is an advocate of prison reform but we don't really have evidence of that. He considers himself a punishment for criminals, he considers himself an equalizer but that's not true because he just delivers criminals into a system that is fundamentally corrupt and unfair. Do you actually think a trial in GOTHAM of all places is going to look at a rich man vs a petty crook the same way? That rarely happens even in real life.

And I don't think that Bruce does what he does out of inherent malice. Bruce is a deeply empathetic person, the core of Bruce Wayne is that he cares. But that's not enough, Bruce was allowed to grow up sheltered and it gave him an intrinsic idealism. He only has a Birdseye view of what the common people go through, that is not enough to stand there and say that he understands . Because he doesn't. He literally can't. And I think this bias, certainly one projected by the writers but that's another issue, comes through the most with Jason and Steph.

As far back as Jason's Robin era - widely regarded as Bruce's peak of being a good dad - he still makes some pretty big mistakes. Because he finds this homeless kid whose family has been ripped apart by the corrupted systems, who has actively experienced the worst Gotham has to offer, and he comes to the conclusion that if he doesn't take Jason home Jason will inevitably become a criminal even after Jason explicitly says he doesn't like stealing. So he takes Jason in but he makes that position as his son synonymous with Robin. And this is where we have to talk about meta because Jason is intrinsically tied to meta narratives. I'm not sure if you saw my other posts about Robin, as a concept, but I'll summarize here.

Child sidekicks are fine, in early comics. When things were campy light hearted whodunnit mysteries with a few action sequences, when you always knew that the child hero would come out unscathed, would always live till the next issue. And so when Bruce makes Jason Robin you have this veil of suspension of disbelief. But Jason's era is where you start seeing these kids' storylines get worse. More gruesome, more violent, more cruel. They start really testing the limit of Bruce's morality.

Batman: The Cult - Robin Jason has to crawl through a pile of dead bodies and while Bruce is having a mental break this MAYBE 14 year old is trying to get them out. The Diplomats Son - Jason watches a rapist be let go, because he's powerful and his dad has money. He sees exactly the kind of damage it does to the victims, he's the one who finds Gloria Stanson. A Death in the Family - Jason is murdered. Tortured and murdered and betrayed. He's dead and he was always intended to STAY dead. And all throughout Tim's run and then into Steph's the writers retroactively change everything about who Jason was because it has to be HIS fault, because if it's not Jason's fault then it might be Bruce's. Because how can audiences see Bruce as just and good for taking in new kids after what happened to the last one?

The suspension of disbelief shatters. Because now Jason is back and he's angry. Because maybe we as readers know that Tim, and Steph, and Damian need to be Robin because Robin makes money with young readers. But you know who doesn't know that? Jason, who no doubt assumed that his survival depended on being Robin. Who was sold out because he was Robin. Who was badmouthed and disgraced the entire time he was gone by people he loved and trusted. Jason doesn't know that he's in a comic book, but I argue he knows he's in a Batman story.

If not from his first appearance then definitely in recent ones. What can you do besides lay down and forgive and keep coming back when you know that the universe revolves around one man? How do you get rid of the terror and anger at realizing that you can never leave, that no matter how much he hurts you the universe will bend itself in half so that he is still just and right? When you realize that the love that has defined you is a disease rooted so deeply that to rip it out would be to kill yourself, that you can't even stay dead because Bruce does not want you to be.

And they couldn't even stick to Jason being the problem! Because then Steph dies. And all I could think was "Of course she did. She's an East End girl whose been compared to Jason constantly. Or a version of him. Of course she would be tortured to death trying to get Bruce's approval." Here we are, history has literally repeated itself, and...Tim is Robin again. Why? Because this is a comic book, and Batman needs Robin.

But what do you think everyone in-universe thinks? What do you think that looks like? How can you possibly still call Bruce a good parent under these circumstances? Bruce calls Robin a blessing, a gift, a necessity. He relies on Robin, physically to watch his back and emotionally to keep him in line. He trains them, he molds them, he loves them.

But sometimes love just isn't enough and the good Robin does shouldn't negate the harm they get in the process. Robin then becomes this horrible force of change, you get it and you know that this has doomed you, one way or another. Because Bruce believes that suffering is noble, that pain can reform people. It's baked into his character. Even if he doesn't intend to hurt his kids, it's not like we haven't seen him justify it to himself and others. "I love you, I did this for your own good, I thought I could help you, it was your fault I did that, it won't happen again, I lost control of myself but only this once, we can be a family again if you just come home." It reads an awful lot like an abuser trying to convince you or himself that he's not in the wrong.

This was longer than I intended it to be, but I guess my main point is that Bruce and Batman can't ever be fully separated. Something that I think his relationship with Cass shows us he's aware of but chooses to ignore. We know that Batman is dangerous, that he wouldn't hesitate to hurt his kids, we saw that with Zurr-Batman (WHO BRUCE ADMITTED WAS A FACET OF HIMSELF YOU CAN'T SAY IT WASN'T HIM BECAUSE HE HIMSELF SAID THAT IT WAS). So why try and act like it's this impossible out of character thing for Bruce to be harmful? For his kids to feel angry and hurt about his actions or for their feelings to be as or more valid than Bruce's. Batman has and will hurt his kids and Bruce will try to rationalize it all away because he loves them, he would never want to hurt them. And the narrative will tell us that Bruce is right, that this is good and fair and just, that Bruce's perspective is the correct one, that his kids deserve this, because this is a comic book and outrage sells. Or they'll retcon it and pretend it never happened. Or they'll just never bring it up again. Or Bruce will be forgiven regardless just to hammer home how good and right he is.

Because this is a comic book about Batman, and Batman is a hero, he is our protagonist, and so he is reliable and we should never doubt him, or call him out, or be mad at him. Naturally.

[bots-and-cons]

Can't tell the future, feat Optimus

A/N: I’m feeling pretty crappy at the moment, so I wanted to write something for that. I usually do things like these on my other blog herofics, but I felt like Optimus was a good fit for this so I decided to write something with him. I tagged this with "suicidal tw" just in case, but it's not really an active thing Idk

You hadn’t been to the base in a while, which had Optimus a little worried. You had called him every day, when you couldn’t make it to the base, so he knew you were okay. There was just something about your voice that was bothering him. You’d told him you were just tired and that there was nothing to worry about, and even though he had let it slide until now, he didn’t really believe you. Optimus decided to go see if you would let him take you for a drive to talk. There hadn’t been any decepticon activity for days, so perhaps he would get lucky and the moment of peace would continue.

You were laying in bed with your laptop, trying to decide which assignment was the most interesting. Of course, it was the one that had the deadline months away and not the one that had the deadline next week. You couldn’t get started on any of your assignments, and the ones you had started seemed impossible to finish.

“Why am I like this?” you muttered tiredly, feeling like you might start crying.

The feeling of disappointment was quickly followed by an intense feeling of anger, which made you want to throw your laptop across the room. Why was it always like this? Why couldn’t you manage even school? Your classmates could manage school, work, their family and the rest of their life, and you couldn’t even stay on top of your assignments. Instead of destroying the laptop you had no money to replace, you just ended up hitting your pillow and screaming into it. Your burst of anger was interrupted as you heard a loud truck horn outside your apartment building. You of course went to look out the window and saw that it was Optimus. You put on a jacket on top of your home clothes and went to see what he wanted, maybe the two minutes outside would miraculously get you out of this slump you were in.

You went downstairs and out the front door of your apartment building and walked up to Optimus.

“What are you doing here?” you asked, sounding much colder than you meant to.

“I wanted to see if you were alright. Would you like to go for a drive?” he asked, seemingly not even noticing your tone.

“No thanks, I-” you paused. You were going to say you had a lot of school work to catch up on, but if you hadn’t managed to get started on even one of them the whole day, going for a drive probably couldn’t really make it any worse.

“Actually yeah, let’s go” you said.

Optimus opened the passenger side door to the cabin and you climbed in.

“Remember your seatbelt” he reminded you before starting to drive off.

“Yeah yeah” you muttered, buckling yourself in. “Where are we going anyway?”

“Where would you like to go?”

“Anywhere? Nowhere? I don’t know, we can just drive around” you sighed.

Optimus was never really one for subtleties, so you weren’t exactly surprised when the question you were dreading came. You knew he wasn’t blind, he could see there was something going on with you and that you weren’t doing well. You had really just hoped that he wouldn’t ask, because you felt like your calm demeanor was hanging on by a thread and it would snap at any moment.

“I do not mean to intrude, but I have noticed you have been quite distant lately. I know you have a habit of pushing others away when you are feeling unwell, because you do not wish to be a burden on anyone” he stated very matter-of-factly. “But I wish you would speak to me about what is weighing on you”

It wouldn’t really do any good to lie to him anyway, so you decided to just talk to him. Maybe he would get tired of you too and stop asking how you were. That’s what seemed to happen with everyone you ever talked to. 

“You asked for this” you sighed, before starting your little rant. “I don’t know if this is depression or burnout or what, but I’m exhausted. I don’t know how I’m supposed to manage 15 different school assignments that have deadlines within days of each other. Sure, some of the deadlines are over a month away, but then there’s like five of them in one week. I can’t even get any of them started”

“It sounds like you are feeling very unwell. Have you discussed this with your attending physician or anyone else in your care team?” Optimus asked with clear worry in his voice.

“Not really. When I’ve had calls or appointments with them, I always feel fine in the moment, so I don’t say anything, and when I get back home, it all explodes in my face” you chuckled dryly, looking out of the side window to the darkness outside. It had started raining too, and since Optimus had decided to turn to the highway, there were barely any lights anywhere anymore, because you were so far away from lived in areas.

“Would you like to discuss your current state of mind with me then? I would like to hear how you are really feeling” he inquired.

“I can try” you sighed. “You know how us humans live so much shorter lives compared to you cybertronians?”

“Yes”

“I remember thinking back to when I was like sixteen years old, that I would never make it to twenty. But here I am, in my mid-twenties and now it has changed to “I don't think I’ll make it to thirty”. I wonder if I’ll ever stop thinking like that? To you, that’s probably nothing. Thirty years goes by in a blink of an eye for you, because you live for millions of years. I can’t even imagine living that long. I can’t even imagine living thirty years…” you trailed off.

Optimus could feel you trembling on the passenger’s seat. You were most likely trying to hold in your tears, to stop yourself from crying. He knew you hated crying in front of others, so he didn’t comment on it.

“You are probably right about the fact that thirty years is a short time for me, but that does not mean I do not appreciate it. Take these last three years we have known each other, for example. It might have been a very short time for me, but it has consisted of some of the best things I’ve experienced in eons. Meeting you, for instance. You are not a burden (Name). You are my most precious one. I do not want to see you in pain, but I would still take that over never seeing you again. You are so very strong, but you must also rest sometimes”

You finally started sobbing the moment you heard the words “my most precious one”. Optimus was the only one to ever say something like that to you, he was the only one who seemed to truly understand what you needed.

“You should not burn yourself out because of something like university. It will wait until you are well again. Life happens now, and you can not sacrifice yourself for a future that you know nothing about. You never know where life might take you, but know this. I will always be there with you. You will never have to face these hardships alone again” Optimus finished.

“Than-thank-thank you” you sobbed like a child.

All the stress, all the grief, everything was just pouring out of you now that the dam had been opened. You were crying like a child, just crying away all your frustration as Optimus kept you safe. Even if your time in this universe was just a blink for him, you hoped he would be there until it was your time to go. Maybe you could stay longer if he was there, maybe you would make it past that thirty year mark if he was with you. You couldn’t tell the future, but you could hope.

[emersonfreepress]

help i'm alive

So! Long time, no see. 2023 was a whole goddamn lot lol

I don't have a demo update to share yet, but that's because I had to scrap nearly everything I managed to write during a very, very, very bad stint of writer's block last year. I hadn't even realized it had been a block like that until I went over my work so far last month and realized it was bad -- like, trust me; a slog to read that didn't even sound like me. It's been extremely frustrating but I've finally broken free of that and it's been easy and actually fun to write again for the first time in actual years. I just hate giving updates that have no actual news in them. And I really had nothing to share other than: I deleted thousands of words and feel so much better now 😅

Anyway, little about my demo plans have changed: I'm still putting out the Chapter 3 demos in Choicescript/on Dashingdon and then will be going dark to move things over to Twine. Where I am in the process right now is... feeling like 35% done with the overhauled version of this chapter and 50% done for the next demo update.

As far as asks, I'm... not really sure what to do?? I believe I've read them all (I love you guys), but so much time has passed since getting most of them that I'm not sure if it's, like... still pertinent??? To go back and answer them?? I suppose some of them like character asks could be, but all the nice messages of support -- that feels weird since I've practically ghosted this blog since August! Idk. Y'all tell me what to do with 'em and I'll do it. Maybe I should make a poll.

Uh... that's really all there is to say regarding the game! I've added some personal stuff after the cut, but if you're done here: Thanks for reading and sticking around. It means the world, for real.

So what has occupied my time all this time? Doctor, therapy, money, and friends. And improv! But especially the first two. There was a lot of non-writing related stuff fucking up my ability to focus and write, so hopefully with my mind and body both feeling a lot better, I can get back to being present and active with the game. I didn't realize how physically unwell I was until last year and it's been like... life-long issues I've been treating. It turns out it's not normal to feel exhausted enough to sleep at any given time, at all times, for your whole life! wow!!

I also uninstalled Tumblr from my phone back in February, so you could say I'm sort of generally focused on offline life. (And what an interesting coincidence that my writer's block dissipated shortly after that...) I also just moved!! The last two weekends have been so expensive and stressful -_- But I can't even compare the old place to the new. We're basically paying the same price for idek how much more space. The cats are so happy; which means the house humans get to be happy.

My schedule is finally freed up from constant medical shit (there was a 3-month stretch this winter with multiple doctor appointments literally every fucking week 🙃🙃🙃). My mental health is doing a lot better -- literally incomparably better compared to where I was this time last year. There's live comedy now (which I dabble in, to be clear lol), but I've finally found myself able to like... balance it all. The physical and creative energy that goes into it all, anyway. The lovely thing about improv is that you kinda just show up and do your thing -- it doesn't cut into my writing time so much as it costs energy. Unless I end up in this comedy debate show thing next month, which I am very excited to give up writing time for

So like... Life is life-ing and I'm just vibing. Or something? I'll be around.

Thank you all again so much for your interest, support, patience, and readership <3

[serial-unaliver]

how tf do you make a post title on the new tumblr mobile app all I can do is make words bigger

hi hello it's sivi aka tonysopranobignaturals or whatever other cursed urls i've had. check my tiktok (nukehenrykissinger) for proof this is really me. if you don't already know I deleted my account a while ago after being put in a "most annoying tumblr users" poll. however, it's not being called an annoying tumblr user that actually caused me to deactivate, but rather the rumors spread as a result. this poll essentially grouped me with pedophiles and nazis and for people who already hated me it was a good opportunity to send anonymous asks telling people I believe awful things, am friends with awful people, etc., and while SOME people actually went to my blog before making assumptions, others did not. at the time this all happened I had over 80,000 followers. having that much attention online is only really useful on websites where you can monetize it. on tumblr it only gets your posts and your blog in places you wish it didn't.

I hoped being off tumblr would improve my mental health and while it did decrease relationship paranoia on social media, otherwise i've been doing quite horribly and put my family in danger several times. it's so bad that i'm saving up to move out so my family can live a more peaceful and safe life. looking back on my delusions that lead to planning murder-suicide (family annihilation) it's hard for me to comprehend how it was myself who got to that point. this disease turns you into someone else and there's only so much you can do to stop it--a person in a psychotic state is not self aware. my psychosis is trauma induced and I WILL have recurrent episodes that I can't predict or prevent. I have to live life with this knowledge. it's not easy. treatment is also difficult, and now that i've moved to an area with absolutely AWFUL healthcare I can barely even get my meds refilled, let alone find a therapist or psychiatrist who actually wants to work with me after seeing my record of institutionalizations.

now, on a more positive note, some people have asked me about my world on my tiktok. well, it's just as active as it's always been, and catching you up on current events would take forever so i'd rather post naturally as things occur like I did before.

and to conclude all of this...if you do have a problem with me for any reason that's fine; i'm not entitled enough to think I inherently deserve everyone's support, but I DO think you could just like, block me and leave it at that. oh yeah and the post says "return to tumblr *maybe*" because i'm not sure if I can handle the attention long enough for me to not delete again LOL.

[bonefall]

God I am so tired of Bramble fans who refuse to use critical thinking and believe that brambleclaw and squilf are equally bad. Many also hate on moonkitti's video which they most likely haven't even watched or misconstrued points in it. You can like a character without defending all their actions please I'm begging you

And people will sometimes jump to their defense, saying that people just dogpiled them for liking a character the fandom doesn't like, and while that can happen, sometimes people are actually dogpiling them for ignoring abuse and insulting creators with different opinions

(Some discourse happened on Twitter recently about this but it's something I've seen happen before, I'm not specifically talking about anyone)

I'm going to be honest and drop my feelings.

Never have I ever actually SEEN a Bramblefan "get dogpiled" for liking Bramble.

I come out here on my massive soapbox every couple of weeks and drop whole essays on this guy, I chat casually about how important he is to me as a character, both as someone who was abused in a way similar to Squirrelflight AND as someone who can relate to Bramblestar's situation, and before BB got so large and my attention was easier to divide I even ran an AU called Sweet Nothings which had a "big brother" Bramble take in it.

There is no shortage of Bramblestar-related posts around here, yet, I have never, NEVER gotten shit for when I talk positively about Bramble.

In fact, he's commonly cited as one of the favorite cats to see on this blog from my audience. I get praise for addressing him with nuance, explaining how his actions are abuse while also keeping him human, talking about how his life is a painful cycle of self-doubt that makes him double down on his worst decisions. Every time I post about him, I get an influx of comments centered around how my takes on him are appreciated.

What I DO see is people who make art where they try to bothsides him and Squirrelflight, or say something completely false about his behavior, or straightup post DARVO tactics to defend their fav's honor. When someone makes a comment that goes "uhmm? Bit strange innit?" they call it "harassment." Or when people block them, they call that "receiving hate."

OR when someone makes a vaguepost like "Heyyy, DARVO is an abuse denial tactic where the abuser or their apologists Deny the abuse took place, Attack the accuser, and then Reverse Victim and Offender to claim they were actually the person harmed. Bramblestans are playing this out, step for step, and that's bad!" they call THAT dogpiling.

Meanwhile Moonkitti got death threats and was actually harassed for posting Bramblestar Is Worse. To the point where she is hesitant to ever make another video on the topic.

So y'know what? Hot take? The stans don't actually like Bramblestar. They like the vague idea of a sadboy character who broke free from his dad's legacy so they slurp up the framing of the notorious abuse apologist writers, and they get mad when people who have critically engaged with the books don't see what they desperately crave.

How can you really LIKE a character if you can't engage with their actions? If you need to surround yourself in an unpoppable bubble and can't accept anything he's done in the 20+ years he's been active? How can you truly love a man without all his mistakes?

It's sooo hard to be me, Tumblr User Bonefall, the ONLY one who likes Bramblestar correctly. It's rough out here.

[recurring-polynya]

In the years since I've been running this blog, I've made a lot of jokes about Renji's seemingly ill-thought-out plan of:

Beat Captain Kuchiki

???

Profit Be with Rukia again

but I was looking at his volume poem the other day, and I think that I am an idiot, and beating Byakuya has never been connected to seeing Rukia again. It's a smokescreen. He does have an actual, actionable plan of training and working hard enough to become a vice-captain (specifically Byakuya's vice-captain), and then approaching Rukia again as her social equal. We know that beating Byakuya wasn't a key component of that, because he was planning to do it as soon as she got back from her mission.

The thing about defeating Byakuya is that Renji is purposely setting his sights a few degrees to the left of the truth to keep from falling into depression and despair. Trying to get Rukia back is a thing that he can try to do and fail, and in fact, he very well may. Beating Byakuya is impossible. No one believes he can really do it, least of all himself, which means, paradoxically, he can't lose. When you fail to do the impossible, you can shrug and say, "well, it was impossible, what did you expect?

I mean, it's right there in the poem: "I am going to focus on reaching the unreachable because if I think about Rukia, I am going to kill myself." And I don't think Renji is a guy who has a suicidal bent--the fact that he pursues this line of thinking is proof of that. But what is the difference between a person who thinks about killing themself and someone actively works to not to...? I don't know. It's complicated.

One of the most fundamental themes of Bleach is the idea that Hollows are fallen souls who lose their hearts and eat other souls in order to ease their pain, but they only end up creating more Hollows in the process except that we see examples again and again of shinigami pulling this exact shit (Byakuya, I am looking at you). I cannot figure out if Renji's drive to distract himself from the pain of losing Rukia is a play to avoid falling into monstrosity, or if it's pretty much a direct route. I mean, this is basically exactly the path that Gin and Tousen take--which makes it all the more interesting to me that Aizen rejects Renji as unsuitable for his conspiracy.

I can't put my finger on any particular thing that separates Renji from other characters in this respect, aside from maybe his fundamental Renji-ness-- the fact that he has other friends and connections? That he has hope, no matter how dim, that he may actually reunite with Rukia some day? That he's just a guy who reaches for life instead of death? (Mildly off-topic, but if there is one other character that this is also true of, I think it might be...Matsumoto???)

Anyway, another thing I like about setting himself against an impossible goalpost is that this would be a terrible idea for a human with a finite lifespan, but shinigami have all the time in the world. Go ahead, pal, pursue your impossible tasks, live your truth! I read a lot of stories about semi-immortal beings, and I love love love it when they seem very human and then they do some batshit insane thing that makes you realize, oh, they very much are not.

My favorite way to break my own heart is re-reading the "Fate is a Millstone" chapter, where we learn that Renji was a hair's-breadth away achieving his real goal of talking to Rukia again, only to have Fate throw him a face-full of pocket sand. I think it's extra salt in the wound, to be honest, if he's been pursuing the impossible goal of beating Byakuya as a distraction for all these years, only to arrive at a place where Rukia's life literally hinges on him beating Byakuya, a thing which is not just theoretically impossible, but something Renji has spent 40 years becoming intimately familiar with just how impossible it is.

[shadowsndaisies]

the hard deck: too observant to play dumb (pt 1)

wc: 1.7 k

synopsis: how the arrival at the hard deck went

main masterlist

athena-verse master post

a/n: hey yall! so fun fact it has been 8 years since I started this blog, and as a little thank you, I have a 3 part update to the athena-verse, the whole thing comprises the hard deck scene from the beginning of the movie and will end basically where athena settles debts starts. as always I hope you enjoy, and let me know if you want to be added to the tags!

You'd been standing with Jake and Javi when Nat finally walked in.

"Athena! I've been looking for you!" she shouts, pulling your attention away from the pool table you'd just set up with Javi.

"Oh shit, sorry 'Nix," you offer a half smile.

"Answer your god damn for when I call you," she groans, pointing menacingly at you.

"Yes, Ma'am," you mock salute before noticing the two men behind her. "Looks like you made new friends just fine though," you offer jokingly.

"Payback, Fanboy. Meet Athena, smoothest flier you'll ever see," Phoenix introduces, and you smile warmly at your friend before offering your hand to the two behind her.

"Nice to meet you fellas," you greet.

"High praise coming from Phoenix," Fanboy notes, shaking your head.

"Highest of the high, actually," Payback adds on.

"Yeah, well, there's almost no one I'd rather have on my wing than 'Nix," you compliment back. You were going to ask how they knew your friend, but someone else interrupted you before you could.

"Yo, are we playing or what?" you roll your eyes as you turn back to where Jake and Javi are standing and gesture to the three in front of you; you realize Jake is hunched over the table, lining up his next shot.

"I'm playing nice, Seresin. You should try it," you prod, and Javi manages a slight smirk at Jake.

Jake looks up and makes eye contact with you while landing a ball in a corner pocket, and you can't help but roll your eyes again, cocky bastard. When he straightens, he finally notices what has caught your attention. "Well, what do we have here? If it ain't Phoenix, and she found new friends," he smirks, walking around the table in your direction. "And here I thought we were special Coyote. Turns out the invite went out to anybody."

It's almost like a switch is flipped, you realize, watching as Jake now interacts with others. Cocky attitude inflating his ego in a way that was so Hangman but not necessarily Jake. Nat didn't believe you when you tried to explain that you saw past it, and that's why you were friends. She was confident in her reading, which fair, especially when he acted like this.

"Fellas this here is Bagman," she introduces, and you can already tell it's going to be a long detachment spent between your two friends, especially since they hate each other.

"Hangman," he corrects, tone slightly barbed.

"Whatever," Phoenix makes a face at him and rolls her eyes when she looks at you as if to say, C'mon Athena, don't you see what I'm talking about? "You're looking at the only naval aviator on active duty with a confirmed air-to-air kill," she adds on, turning back to Jake.

Your eyes narrow at the compliment-like a statement; however, you don't trust it for a second.

Hangman smiles, "Stop," he muses as he settles down beside you, bumping your shoulder with his as he does, full of pride like a peacock strutting his feathers.

"Mind you, the other guy was in a museum piece from the Korean War," she clarifies, and you nod; you felt this was where she was taking it.

"Cold War," Coyote corrects, always one to back up his friends.

"Different wars, same century," Payback interjects.

"Not this one," Fanboy tacks on.

"Who're your friends?" Coyote asks, eyes dancing over the two on either side of Phoenix.

"Payback."

"Fanboy."

Both aviators introduce themselves with a simple nod, and you can't hide your smile of amusement. The testosterone was off the charts, and Nat was leading the bunch.

"Hey Coyote," she greets, eyes darting to Javi, and you fight the smirk at the look in her eye.

"Hey," he greets, dragging out the 'ey' a bit, and your eyes dart over to Jake just to find a knowing look already focused on you.

"Who's he?" Nat asks, nodding to the side.

"Who's who?" Coyote's brows had furrowed down, and then Nat turned to look at the quiet Aviator in glasses who'd been munching on peanuts while you played pool.

"When did you get in?" Coyote's voice floats over from behind you as you take a moment to observe your silent comrade.

"Oh, oh I've been here the whole time," he admits, and your brow quirks, and quickly you turn to look over at Jake.

"Man's a stealth pilot," you muse gently, and even Nat cracks a smile.

"Literally," Coyote nods.

"Weapons systems officer, actually," he corrects, and your lips twitch; he's adorable, you decide immediately.

"With no sense of humor," Jake huffs out.

You elbow him, and he gasps before standing and handing off the pool cue to Nat.

"What do they call you?" you ask, voice sweet.

"Bob," he answers, offering a hesitant smile in response to your wide one.

"No, your call sign," Payback clarifies.

He seems to hesitate, "uh.." he trails for a second, and you can read the nervous energy easily. "Bob," he repeats, and you frown a bit at the cautious undertones of his voice.

"Bob Floyd?" Nat asks. "You're my new backseater? From Leemore?" her tone had turned a bit incredulous. The smothered chortles from Payback and Fanboy were not nearly as covert as they seemed to think it was, based on the glares Nat was sending them.

"Looks like it, yeah," Bob confirms, and that nervous undertone is still there.

Nat pauses and looks at you. You tilt your head knowingly, and she nods, turning to the back seater.

"Nine ball, Bob. Rack 'em."

"Uh.. kay, yeah," he nods, standing and taking the pool cue outstretched in Natasha's hand.

You pat your friend's shoulder knowingly before turning to look for Jake. You spot him at the bar and start walking that way. You pause, though, when you see him talking to Penny, and then you realize who was on the other side of her and, most likely, who had just caused the bell to ring. Leave it to your dad to piss off the woman who loved him through his worst and best without even trying.

You're so focused on watching the interaction at the bar you miss it when he walks in.

"Bradshaw! That you?" Nat's voice rings out over the noise of the bar. It's only now starting to get busy, and you can't help the way your head snaps over to him.

You'd knew he'd be here. He said as much in his email, but being confronted by him and the past you avoided was something you decided then and there that you weren't ready for.

You're stuck, frozen, watching him interact with Phoenix.

"This is how I find out you're stateside?" she asks before lining up to take her next shot.

"Yeah I thought I'd surprise you," he responds with an easy camaraderie that you hadn't realized existed with the woman you considered to be one of your closest friends these days.

He's looking around the bar, not having spotted you yet, when Nat lets out a hum, taking her shot. Obviously, she lands another in the pocket; this was Phoenix we're talking about. She manages to hit Bradley in the gut with the end of the pool cue, forcing him to keel over a bit.

A petty and vindictive piece of you takes pleasure in that. But another piece, a little girl, she aches for the easygoing relationship and the best friend she once had.

"Guess I surprised you back," she smirks, facing Bradley.

He nods at her, "it's good to see you," he manages to huff out, slowly standing back up.

"It's good to see you too," she smiles, and he lays a gentle hand on her shoulder, and you have to turn back around.

You're counting your breaths again, focusing on what you can see, touch, hear, taste, and smell. You realize too late that Jake's analyzing you. He'd seen how you stiffened up and focused on the interaction, and he saw how you forced yourself to turn around, away from Bradley.

He grabs the beers Penny offers him and a glass of something else, says something to Penny, you think, and then turns back, walking toward you. He places the glass in your hand with a whispered "G&T."

"Thanks," you manage to spit out.

"Where's your head?" he asks, voice still low, and you know that right now, no one is paying attention to the two of you.

"A little too far off the ground," you admit; it wasn't worth the effort to lie to Jake; generally, he saw through it anyway.

You notice how his eyes dart past you, looking at Brad and Nat, but he doesn't ask you about it. Instead, he asks, "What do you need?"

"Time machine?" you ask, eyes finally meeting his straight on instead of jumping around like they had been. He was good at that, asking the right questions; probably a perk of learning how to piss everyone off is also knowing when to pull back.

"Fresh out, I'm afraid," the drawl in his Texan accent always appeared early in the morning and late at night, but also when he drank. Your favorite appearance was in the whispers when he talked low, and it just tended to bleed into every word; it made you think of Jake the football star, Jake the kid who grew up on a ranch, a version of the man before you, you never got to meet.

"Then I guess I'll have to just… manage," you muse sourly.

"You always tend to do better than just manage, 'Thena," he reminds you.

"I don't know about that, at least not this time," you admit.

"This got something to do with Bradshaw?"

"You're too observant to play dumb," is how you answer.

"What, is this a kiss and not tell situation?" There's a cloud in the green of Jake's eyes as he asks, and you're tempted to answer, but quite honestly, you weren't sure if there was a statute of limitations on don't kiss and tell, and you're not sure if your first kiss when you were 13 counts.

"No, it's a different kind of history," is what you actually say. "I'll be okay, you go on though, I just need a minute," you urge.

Jake hesitates, not at all sold on what you'd said, but slowly, he takes a step forward and then another until he's approaching the pool table again.

...

everything: @butterfly-skinnylegend

athena’s tags: @omgbrianab @smoothdogsgirl @bazellawriz @sbrewer21 @inky-sun @djs8891 @rory-cakes

[rainbowsky]

Hi RBS

Why gg is related to little prince in that little prince and rose story??

Hi Anon,

Fake, fan fiction, CPN.

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint Exupéry is a classic, exceptionally popular, beautifully told and illustrated story. Those who haven't read it can find it here.

Standard disclaimer: This is my own personal opinion based on my own interpretation of tidbits I've learned over the years. Everyone is free to come up with their own.

If you ask a solo they'll give you a completely different story than a turtle would about how The Little Prince is connected to GG, but I think GG's (and DD's) connection to that story runs far deeper than anything any fan - solo or turtle - can claim.

The Solo Interpretation

The solo interpretation revolves around the prince's red cape and the many references to the red cape that GG has made in his art and on social media over the years, which many believe were in response to fan activity.

The first reference came during a live broadcast of XFIRE, where GG created a pencil drawing of a boy wearing a cape and holding a ball. Later he posted a colored version of the image on his social media, where it was revealed that the boy was wearing a red cape and holding a glowing moon.

His fans named themselves Xiao Fei Xia (Chinese for 'Peter Pan') after seeing the image. The name sounds like Chinese for 'small fat shrimp', which is why XFX are often called shrimps (or tempuras, in malicious references).

When his fans won him a solo song, he posted a photo of a boy wearing a crown and a red cape. He later changed his Weibo badge to The Little Prince in a red cape. In Nov 2019 he posted an image of himself on Oasis with a red cape and crown drawn on.

"But why do they think The Little Prince is about them, when they call themselves Peter Pans?" you might ask.

That is a somewhat ambiguous connection, but as far as I can tell it's because of the idea that he's their Little Prince and they are his Peter Pans. The song Satisfaction - which was meaningful to GG and his fans - was connected to the image he shared of the boy wearing the cape and crown. There is also the red cape connection. They wear a red cape, and 'their Little Prince' wears one too. Red is GG's color, and the color XFX identify their fandom with.

A Deeper Connection

In any case, like I said - I think GG's connection to the Little Prince goes deeper than fandom, and the simplest answer to why it has become so connected with him is that he loves the story. It means a lot to him, and on some level he really identifies with the character.

And it's not difficult to see why both GG and DD identify with this story. I actually wrote a whole thing about that a while ago on my blog but of course, I can't find it now. So frustrating.

The Little Prince presents a lot of themes about personal development, love, acceptance, self-acceptance, friendship and found family that resonate with queer readers, with artistic/creative people, and with anyone who has had to live with loneliness or isolation (such as incredibly famous people who are forced to live somewhat separate from the rest of the world). There are themes about grief and loss, and about different points of view.

To me, the story is about how wisdom comes through wonder. More than anything, The Little Prince is about maintaining one's sense of childlike wonder and sensitivity in the face of all the pains and trials of life, and in spite of all attempts to kill our spirit. No matter what we have lost and long for, we can find beauty in the love we have and the connections we make.

It is that spirit of wonder that makes everything special, and makes us special too. It's what makes us able to look beneath the surface and see what's really important.

This is something GG quite obviously values very deeply. He has referred to DD as a sweet, pure-hearted boy in the past, and has spoken appreciatively about the fact that DD has managed to keep a sense of childishness and guilelessness despite being in this industry for so long, and from such an early age.

And GG himself displays those qualities in abundance. He has a very light-hearted, sweet, wonderstruck, sensitive, curious, cute side that is a huge part of the magnetism of his personality. We see this come out a lot in his downtime, such as when he was at Universal Studios, or when he was wandering the streets of Europe. One of the things that is most compelling about him is his willingness to show that side of himself, even as a grown man.

This is - as I've said many times - part of GG and DD's incredible chemistry and compatibility. They share their own little world, and this world of fun, laughter, sweetness, mischievousness and curiosity - the spirit of learning, exploring and cackling together like gremlins - this is all very much aligned with the themes of The Little Prince.

Even the moments of loneliness and separation and coming back together again, the stars in the sky and the ringing of bells - all of this is connected to the story of The Little Prince.

And if you believe the CPN about GG's birthday letter to DD (which I definitely do), this is a message GG gives DD: grow up slowly. That idea has appeared in fake rumors and other references in the fandom. And it's very aligned with the themes of The Little Prince.

From the book: (mild spoilers for those who haven't read it). Slightly abridged.

...he looked at me steadily, and replied to my thought:

“I am thirsty, too. Let us look for a well...”

I made a gesture of weariness. It is absurd to look for a well, at random, in the immensity of the desert. But nevertheless we started walking.

“What makes the desert beautiful,” said the little prince, “is that somewhere it hides a well...”

I was astonished by a sudden understanding of that mysterious radiation of the sands. When I was a little boy I lived in an old house, and legend told us that a treasure was buried there. To be sure, no one had ever known how to find it; perhaps no one had ever even looked for it. But it cast an enchantment over that house. My home was hiding a secret in the depths of its heart...

“Yes,” I said to the little prince. “The house, the stars, the desert—what gives them their beauty is something that is invisible!”

As the little prince dropped off to sleep, I took him in my arms and set out walking once more. I felt deeply moved, and stirred. It seemed to me that I was carrying a very fragile treasure. It seemed to me, even, that there was nothing more fragile on all Earth. In the moonlight I looked at his pale forehead, his closed eyes, his locks of hair that trembled in the wind, and I said to myself:

“What I see here is nothing but a shell. What is most important is invisible...”

As his lips opened slightly with the suspicion of a half-smile, I said to myself, again: “What moves me so deeply, about this little prince who is sleeping here, is his loyalty to a flower—the image of a rose that shines through his whole being like the flame of a lamp, even when he is asleep...” And I felt him to be more fragile still. I felt the need of protecting him, as if he himself were a flame that might be extinguished by a little puff of wind...

And, as I walked on so, I found the well, at daybreak.

Bottom line: Be who you are, stay true to yourself, don't let the world destroy all the soft, sweet, fun, creative, childlike, insightful, open-hearted parts of you.

You are special because of what you love.

GGDD and The Little Prince

Both GG and DD have been repeatedly associated with The Little Prince, and both have been referred to as "little prince" by fans. The Little Prince and his rose have been beloved by turtles as a frequently occurring candy/CPN in the fandom for years.

This started for DD back in his Uniq days. There's an example of this in an early Uniq interview. At the start each group member is being introduced, and their group role is listed onscreen along with the names fans use to refer to them, DD's nicknames are listed as "White Peony, Little Prince." (They're all such babies here!! 🥺)

And he really is a Little Prince, both in terms of his youthful, pure-hearted wonder and in terms of his appearance. There are countless examples of Prince Bobo.

Both GG and DD have been associated directly with the story of The Little Prince, in that both have performed readings of the story - GG in 2018, DD in 2018 and 2019.

(Sorry, no Eng subs for that last one).

The brand Roseonly created many Little Prince themed items back when GG was endorsing them.

The recent photoshoot DD did for T Magazine was themed around The Little Prince, and people saw similar references in the photoshoot GG did for Marie Claire.

The Little Prince - CPN

There are too many CPN references to The Little Prince - or to elements from the story - to list them all here, but here are a few:

The Name

One of the things BXG get excited about is that in Chinese, The Little Prince is actually called 小王子 (Xiao Wang Zi - literally 'little king child'). While the character 小 (Xiao, meaning 'little') isn't the same as the Xiao character used in GG's name (his name uses 肖, which is a Chinese surname), they are pronounced the same*.

*Incidentally, 小 is the same character that connects XFX to the Peter Pan name, '小飞侠' or 'Xiao Fei Xia'.

I think it's also likely that it's a big part of why GG and DD feel a connection to The Little Prince - because in Chinese, it references/connects their names.

They both love word play and have connected their names in the past - in the BTS when they were filming the library scene and GG wrote WangXiao with the calligraphy brush, on DDU when they were asked to come up with a team name and DD suggested BJYX and GG suggested Yizhan instead. It's very much in keeping with their personalities to enjoy that connection.

The Huang Ziteng post

Back in 2020 Huang Ziteng made a social media post that referenced The Little Prince. It consisted of a photo of a Little Prince figurine and thank you card with a rose pin. The text of the post read, "The child told me he received a gift, so happy. "The most important things cannot be seen, but must be felt with the heart." It was posted on September 13 at 18:23 (Yizhan - Yibo Loves Zhan).

The Birthday Cake

When DD rode his motorcycle out to spend GG's birthday together back in 2018, the birthday cake was Little Prince themed.

There was also a restaurant scene from Gank Your Heart where a Little Prince cake topper randomly appeared on the table. Does anyone else remember that? I can't find the actual scene, but it was very 👀.

EDIT: here it is!

On the plate in the foreground.

A Dream Like A Dream

When A Dream Like A Dream premiered in Wuhan, the theatre plaza was overrun with flowers for GG, and he had to make a statement asking fans not to bring flowers. Fans got together and gave flowers away all over the city. GG posted a photo of a single rose, which turtles believed was sent to him by DD.

The caption: "With love, the sun warms the spring." The kadian "Love Zhan, My Bo."

Day Day Up

DDU was a source for a few Little Prince-related CPN. There was a Little Prince figurine on the DDU set, next to a skateboard,

and of course everything surrounding The Brightest Star in the Sky.

DD has frequently been referred to as the 'lonely star', and there is a great deal of CPN about GGDD and stars.

There's also a fake rumor that after DD's motorcycle accident back in 2020, GG was overheard recording a voice message for DD and saying, "you always shine brightly."

There are too many star references to mention. Also too many moon references to mention. There is a LOT of CPN that connects to The Little Prince. It comes up quite often in the fandom. I'm not going to try to gather them all here. Suffice it to say that it's very well solidified as something turtles feel a deep connection with.

Either/or is such a bitch

One of the things I find really frustrating about fan culture is that it is so warlike. Never is this more apparent than when talking about things like this. Solos believe The Little Prince references are for them. Turtles believe GG and DD are referencing each other.

Just a reminder to everyone - it's quite possible for BOTH to be true.

It's quite possible for GG and DD to find all of these things significant at the same time. It's quite possible for us to allow all those significances to coexist without making them into a battle.

More than anything, the references are for and about GG and DD. We can share our excitement for them because we're all their fans. We all love them. It doesn't have to be a fight.

[mimble-sparklepudding]

FFXIV Blog Positivity Ask Game.

Given that things are a bit sad and stressful at the moment, I thought it might be a good time to spread a little community positivity - and hopefully celebrate some FFXIV blogs of which people might not be aware.

Hightlight a FFXIV blog from which you are always happy to see a post.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that people might not know about, but that you would like to recommend to others.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with an OC who has a really compelling backstory.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that often makes you laugh.

Highlight a new FFXIV blog that would you like more people to interact with.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with an OC who is just incredibly, if not unreasonably, sexy.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who is really supportive of others in the community.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with a really original OC.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who is a really talented writer.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with some fantastic original art, whether digital or traditional.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that expands on lore in an interesting way.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that deserves more recognition by a wider audience.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who is always a joy to interact or RP with.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with some impressive gposes or screenshots.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger with whom you still can't quite believe you are actually mutuals.

Highlight a FFXIV blog which gives you "all the feels".

Highlight a FFXIV blog with an OC about whom you really want to learn more.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that has made you think about a character or setting in a different way.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who works hard to bring people together and promote events and activities.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with a romance or ship that you really enjoy.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that explores an existing canon character in an interesting way.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with an engaging OC who is morally grey, if not outright villainous...

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who really inspires you.

Highlight a FFXIV blog which does erotica (or smut) really well.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with an OC that you consider particularly cute or endearing.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who you consider to be especially talented at producing gifs or videos.

Highlight a FFXIV blog which has challenged you to think about an aspect of lore in a different way.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that explores difficult or complex emotions really well.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with an OC in whom you feel particularly invested.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who should have more confidence in their skills.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with an OC who is particularly loveable or endearing.

Highlight a FFXIV blog which you recommend new community members should follow.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who is looking for more RP opportunities (and deserves them).

Highlight a FFXIV blog that does something impressive or different with a popular trope or character.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who made you feel really welcome when you first joined the community.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that you've really enjoyed seeing develop over time.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with a variety of compelling OCs - perhaps so many that you're impressed they can keep track of them all.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with a really strong and defined theme.

Highlight a FFXIV blog that is completely different to yours, whether in terms of focus or style, but you really enjoy.

Highlight a FFXIV blog with inspriring and/or impressive glamour or outfits.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who you wish posted more often.

Highlight a FFXIV blog which portrays or describes combat or warfare particularly well.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who answers OC (or other) asks with really interesting responses.

Highlight a FFXIV blog which does comedy really well.

Highlight a FFXIV blogger who has become a friend.

Remember that highlighting a particular blog as an example of one that is funny or original etc does not mean that other blogs or bloggers are not also worthy of mention. This is just about giving an example from the many blogs you no doubt follow. If you really can't choose then you could always roll a dice - or list all of the ones that qualify, but you might be there for some time...

[wonryllis]

VERY IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT PLS READ!

tagging some moots. @koishua @enhalpy @boyfhee @okwonyo @lilyuwon @lheebra @tyunni @pockettwinzz @diorsyun @alvojake @leaderwon @isoobie @jjunae @stwrjvke @wonlvkay @kareyuns @intromortal @hooniehon @jungqkook @cornenhapovs @jaylaxies @fakeuwus @pprodsuga @glitterjay @sainns ( sorry if i missed you )

with my recent activities you all must have known this was coming. actually i myself had no idea, for real, that i would ever be doing this at all but here we are. there are some things we can't avoid in life, and i honestly never believed in it myself, until now.

this must not be shocking at all i know since there have been hints of it everywhere on my account recently especially my side blog @wonryllise and i really hope you all understand where i am coming from.

i really really really did not expect or want to be doing this but it is so very important and essential that it had to be done. it is a necessary part of my life and i can't just ignore it this way any longer and keep it inside me. it has been eating away at me so bad and i have been so conflicted over this matter for days now maybe even weeks.

hence i ask for your utmost empathy when i announce the inevitable and i hope i do not let you down with these words of mine.

i will completely get it if you decide not to support me or are upset with this decision of my mine but the circumstances are such that i have to do this in this disappointing manner with such words.

it has been five months since i started this blog and it's only now that i have realized this and it has been sitting inside my subconscious and i have been too afraid to address it. my deepest and biggest apologizes to each one of you who has been with me for so long and supporting me endlessly.

and so with the heaviest heart i am announcing this for the first the last time on this account of mine .. that sunghoon is officially my bias besides jungwon, he's my man and i am crazy over him and couldn't resist this anymore and here we are. this had to be done sooner or later, tell me you all saw this coming because yes i did see it myself. i was just avoiding the inevitable for the longest time.

[butch-reidentified]

if you think agp is a thing(and presumably exclusive to trans women) what do you think of cis women claiming to masturbate in front of mirrors and CIA women who report being aroused by breastfeeding?

literally every single answer to these questions is available on my blog. I'm tired of writing the same posts over and over and over. if you can't find sufficient answers scrolling my blog, searching key words on my blog (or on google citing my blog, which yields better results oftentimes), going through the links in my pinned, or checking the tags referenced in my pinned, then I'd say if it's reeeeally important to you to get answers, your best bet will be to sit tight and occasionally check for updates to my Pinned as I am gradually adding more and more links detailing my views, and/or skim my blog from time to time - it's pretty much guaranteed to cycle through again within a month at most 🤷

I was actually gonna put a partial (that is to say, just not my usual thorough, detailed, and nuanced) answer at the beginning, but honestly I'm getting VERY tired of anonymous strangers who most likely just stumbled across my blog for the first time today thinking they're entitled to a personalized thinkpiece from me when almost every time I get an ask like this (which are distinctly different from good faith curiosities, which I'm more than happy to answer), I've already posted my answer, I've already written about the subject in depth on my blog. so I'll put my answer below instead so you have to read all of the above first, so you at least sort of vaguely kinda earn some response by putting in a miniscule fraction of the work/time I've put into both reading/informing myself about all sorts of different opinions, ideologies, experiences, perspectives, and views (rather than just demanding opinions from strangers on anon, lmao) and writing countless posts (& that's just on here, ignoring the offline side which is where I'm wayyy more active), which are almost always VERY long and detailed and proofread and edited and polished several times over.

btw, kind of a side note -- I have NEVER sent a single anon in my life, and I have NEVER, anonymously or not, demanded someone give me a personalized just-for-me explanation of their opinions (or any at all). the reason I call this entitlement is because you (most likely) aren't asking out of genuine curiosity or good faith. you (most likely) are asking because you dislike what you think my views are (you are most likely misinformed and think I believe things I do not) and you (most likely) think this is some kind of gotcha rather than the same ignorant, unoriginal, boring ass points that I've read countless times as far back as when I was a transactivist and trans-identifying myself. they've been debunked/responded to by a LOT of other women, too, and I'm very confident you could easily find at least one such response. I'm not holding you to a standard I don't also hold myself to; in fact, that I'm going to give you any degree of actual answer at all is demonstrative of my holding myself to a HIGHER standard. because again, nothing I'm about to say on this topic is just now in this post being born into the universe as a novel thought. or even a novel tumblr post; like I said, you could find the radfem answers to this ask yourself with just a tiny bit of effort - and while radfems are far from a monolith, and I am a frequent vocal dissenter on a variety of radblr hot topics, this isn't even really a matter of opinion. read on to find out why.

Part A - Not answering the questions here per se, but a clarification of terminology that may help you (any reader, not necessarily anon) see my perspective:

The word "cis" has different definitions. It used to mean someone who is not trans, whereas trans referred to sex-dysphoric transitioners, a demographic who now often prefer terms like transsexual or transsex or simply "sex-dysphoric" BECAUSE they don't agree with gender identity ideology (GII) and object to the way GII has been actively hostile to them and erased transsexuality (and thus their identities, needs, beliefs, and experiences as well), similarly to the ways in which GII engages with pretty much everything that isn't complete and total blind allegiance. These include but are far from limited to:

1. Obfuscating people's (especially children's/young adults' - as they are the primary consumers of most GII content by far) understanding of biology, particularly as it pertains to the sexes of human beings and sexual dimorphism, and inserting "gender identity" as a direct (but importantly not synonymous or remotely parallel) replacement for the material and biological reality of sex. Sex, absent patriarchy and the gender construct, is simply a neutral and factual categorization of human beings: sex categorizes human body types according to the two developmental pathways that evolved solely for the purpose of producing one gamete type or the other to enable perpetuation of the species via sexual reproduction. What this statement does NOT imply to anyone reading it with even an ounce of integrity/intellectual honesty: "women are defined by having babies," "infertile/childfree adult female humans are not women," "humans with anomalous sexual development of any variety are not male or female, but rather a 3rd sex or even proof sex is a spectrum," or anything along these lines; I refer to these arguments as intellectually dishonest because they are originally intentional (disinformation -> misinformation) misinterpretations & serve to moralize, dogmatize, and essentially theologize facts of nature.

This obfuscation of biology is committed via a variety of tactics that frequently include outright gaslighting; "gender and sex are different" turned into "sex is actually a spectrum" (it's not - read on to learn why not!) and then outright science denial while gaslighting others as being the unscientific, uneducated, "3rd grade understanding of biology" ones (again, this is simply factually not true*).

*Feel free to request to see a peer-reviewed neuroscience journal publication bearing my name and/or my thesis (original research regarding the overlapping genetics + epigenetics of norepinephrine dysregulation in both dysautonomia and attention deficit disorders) if you are skeptical of my credentials regarding biology. alternatively, feel free to cite your sources and I will provide a free-of-charge peer review service :)

2. Building from #1, the erasure of patriarchal sex-based oppression of women & girls (by definition: human beings of the female sex, adults & children respectively) via aforementioned tactics obfuscating sex biology & human biology in favor of an innate, internal "gender identity" which is extremely poorly defined with the individual "gender identities" themselves left utterly non-delineated. Gender identity ideology is to be taken entirely on pure faith, despite the fact that there is absolutely no evidence to support gender identity as a universal component of human beings/universal human experience. In fact, the existence of absolutely any nonzero quantity of human beings who do not experience gender identity firmly disproves it as universal human experience - and we know not all humans have a gender identity. However, every human being experiences sexual development, be it typical, disordered (DSDs, congenital infertility, etc), or otherwise anomalous; the vast majority experience typical sexual development, and one's sex is entirely clear in the vast majority of atypical cases as well. Female humans are oppressed on the basis of our biological reproductive capabilities; patriarchy desires control over the female sex as a direct product of its desire to control reproduction. Patriarchy created the gender construct to instill and enforce a caste system between the sexes upholding the patriarchal dogma of male supremacy and female inferiority. Similarly, patriarchy created father-gods in order to make the creation of life a male act. Erasure of sex in favor of the gender construct serves male supremacy and cannot ever be anti-patriarchal or feminist. Evidence of sex based oppression abounds offline (frankly, you need look no further than menstruation stigma in all its forms up to and including menstrual huts, but there is infinitely more evidence) and right here on my blog as well; I even have some posts tagged to serve as proof of sex based oppression.

3. Erasing homosexuality via working toward erasure of exclusive same-sex attraction (this is particularly targeted at lesbians, and this is VERY well documented. I have many examples of this in my TRA Receipts tag, including a particularly excellent masterpost containing, in total iirc THOUSANDS of screenshots), once again replacing sex with "gender identity" as if one's orientation being defined as attraction to another human's invisible, internal, and highly individual "gender identity," which not all humans even purport to have in the first place, could possibly make any sense. This is uniquely absurd.

As stated in the 2nd link in #1 on my Pinned, I object to the usage of "cis" for non-trans-identifying people. Why? At the core of it, because the most commonplace definition of "cis"/'cisgender" that I see at this point in time is "having a gender identity that aligns with what was assigned at birth." As stated above, gender identity is not universal, rendering "cisgender" equally as personal and internal of an identity label as "transgender" - and these are not a pure dichotomy by any means. Radical feminism does not grant any degree of objective factual legitimacy to the gender construct; thus, no radical feminist is or can be, by definition, transgender or cisgender (this does not carry over to whether or not radfems can have dysphoria or even be medically transitioned). Radfems are not the only humans without "gender identities," and it is dishonest and disrespectful to force the term/label onto everyone else according to an ideology we/they may not share.

Part B - The Long-Awaited Answer! [I changed my mind since this ended up significantly longer than initially planned so here ya go]

Autogynephilia was coined as a term with a specific definition. That definition is still the same one in use today. That definition explicitly states that only males can qualify. That definition is: "a paraphilia that describes when a man experiences sexual arousal from the thought of himself as a woman" per Google, and "a male's propensity to be sexually aroused by the thought of himself as a female" per Blanchard's original stated intention for the term he created. Wikipedia goes on to add "intending for the term to refer to 'the full gamut of erotically arousing cross-gender behaviors and fantasies.'"

I have many criticisms of Blanchard himself and of the quality of his research methodologies. However, the evidence for the existence of the paraphilia itself is abundant and undeniable given that many males outright refer to themselves as autogynephiles and many have openly discussed their experiences as someone with this paraphilia. What I do not believe is that all trans-identifying males are AGPs, that there is proven legitimacy to the HSTS/AGP dichotomy (even Blanchard himself said not all OSA trans-identifying males are AGPs - just a whole lot of them), or that non-trans-identifying males can't be AGPs - actually I think it's likely that most AGPs don't identify as transgender.

The core of the paraphilia, the source of the arousal, is a product of the patriarchal sex caste system; autogynephiles are aroused by the idea of themselves as women - as they themselves have stated - because of the sexual objectification of femaleness and/or because they're aroused by degradation and humiliation (as is blatantly obviously on brilliant display in the existence of and obsession with "forced feminization" and similar female-degrading sexual concepts), and the AGP male views femaleness and the gender that patriarchy has forcibly ascribed to femaleness ("femininity") as inferior and thus sees his engagement in performing femininity as degrading - which in turn sexually excites him.

One reason some women find themselves arousing in their own bodies and natural non-performative states is the same as when men find themselves arousing in their own bodies and natural non-performative states: self-confidence increases libido and associations can be made between A and B. Where women and men inevitably differ, however, is about the arousal surrounding performing femininity and/or sexual self-objectification. It is not at all unreasonable to speculate that some women can be turned on when they "feel hot" for a reason other than just self-confidence; for one speculative example, it's possible that some women may see herself in the mirror all dressed up in hypersexualized clothing and feel that they've succeeded in mirroring the pornified images and sexually-appealing-to-males beauty expectations. Ultimately, this is self-objectification. It's patriarchy and the male gaze that have forced these associations onto all of society, and hypersexual associations have a tendency of causing sexual arousal in people (duh).

Oh and I've never heard of women being aroused by breastfeeding, only complaining about it being painful asf, but like. Nipples are among the most common and well-documented non-genital erogenous areas so? This seems terribly unlikely to be a common phenomenon, but utterly irrelevant to the existence of autogynephilia regardless lol. If this is a thing, like I said I doubt it's commonplace at all, but even just hypothetically, I'd say it would distinctly fall in line with everything else I say in this answer. Patriarchy and its pornographers have indeed sexualized breastfeeding - there are a concerning number of men who ask their partners NOT TO BREASTFEED their babies - his own children! - because it makes him JEALOUS and even resent the baby. I'm dead serious you can look this up, it happens. So... read on for elaboration.

I neither know nor care precisely what you're referencing in this ask, because the answer remains the same: autogynephilia by definition can only affect males, and males who have a fetish for the idea of themselves as female, be that through imagining themselves Fucked (anatomically female, specifically in a sexually objectified - aka Fucked - manner; the anatomical/biological form of autogynephilia fetishizes the male subject imagining himself as the female Fucked object of pornography) or Feminine (as discussed above) fundamentally are not and cannot be the same as women who are turned on by feeling like they look sexually appealing or by their own natural anatomy or biological functions (which have been violently hypersexualized by patriarchy). This is a form of internalized misogyny; when men do it, it's just misogyny. These are not the same.