duckiewrites

[duckiewrites]

no one talks about how subtlely the grief cloud leaves you.

[duckiewrites]

i used to have dreams of a great love story. the kind I saw in all the fairytales and bollywood romances I grew up with. but suddenly, im 19, realizing that the great love story I've dreamed of has been with me the whole time. My friends, my mom, my dad, my brother, my aunts, my uncles, my favorite teacher. The unwavering unconditional love I've always craved has never left me. It's just been hidden under layers of insecurities.

[duckiewrites]

there's something so unwaveringly loyal about female friendships that I pity the men who may never experience such unconditional love.

[duckiewrites]

Deferral Letter Last Minute Essay Editing!!

Hey everyone,

I am currently a cornell student passionate about writing, but I know all too well the pressure and anxiety that comes from being deferred from your dream school. So i am offering a free service...

I'd love to help any current high school senior out with their deferral letters. Please feel free to contact me at duckiewritess@gmail.com! I know most college application deadlines have already passed, but if anyone has some last minute essays they'd like help editing, please also feel free to send through email.

If you'd like to just fill out a form instead of sending an email here you go: https://forms.gle/ko1nFRCdy2Y7Y9W46

[duckiewrites]

you are not guaranteed the love you give out. holy fuck I wish someone would’ve told me that sooner.

[duckiewrites]

I think grief has genuinely altered my brain chemistry. Before she died, I was intact. Yes, I could get angry too quickly. Or sad too easily. I talked too much. I was always tired, etc. I was damaged, yes. But, I was still human. After her death, I fear there is no human left in me. The things that used to excite me now barely raise an eyebrow. and so yes, i am still alive. but barely so.

[duckiewrites]

I wish there wasn't so much holding me back. I wish I could live without the fear of abandonment constantly creeping up on me. I am falling behind.

[duckiewrites]

sometimes i wonder if the privilege i have been awarded in this lifetime has been stained with mediocrity.

[duckiewrites]

a life without you.

[duckiewrites]

Introduction

hi everyone,

welcome to my blog! i plan to mostly post my writing, but i will also be posting study inspo/study with mes.

im currently a student at cornell university majoring in biology (hypothetically premed) with a passion for writing!

some of my other interests: research, women's health, psychiatry, film theory, reading, journaling, yapping, music, badminton

if you would like some essay editing/writing buddy/etc. reach out to me at duckiewritess@gmail.come <3

use my askbox if you'd like to contact me anonymously :))

if you'd like to stay updated, consider dropping a follow!!

lots of love always <333

[duckiewrites]

grief is the price of love.

it is a privilege to have loved you so much

 that i grieve you so obsessively.

i imagine you in the empty seat beside me.

i imagine your laugh in the eerie silence of the night.

i imagine your embrace in every lonely moment.

but imagine is all i can do.

sometimes i wonder

has

this privilege

has turned into a punishment.

[duckiewrites]

harry potter library 📍 cornell university

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[duckiewrites]

a friendship breakup is so much fucking worse than a relationship breakup man. that shit hurts.

~ every teenage girl ever

[duckiewrites]

grief is like a longing that never quite goes away.

some days the longing stays quiet, hidden under the distractions of the day. driving to work, walking the dog, studying for an exam, etc.

other days, the longing consumes me. it holds me hostage. clawing at me, marking me.

it always finds its way back.

[duckiewrites]

really struggling to focus 🫠