calmtheeyourtits

[calmtheeyourtits]

On July 12th, 2014 my beloved Boobs McGee left us all forever. I did not find out until July 14th, and before I found out - this butterfly was just chilling by me at the pool for a solid 30-45 minutes. Comfort comes on the wings on a butterfly, I hear they say. 

Our blog had remained dormant for nearly a year after an unfortunate falling out due to complicated circumstances last year. So coming here has been a humbling means of closure for both her life and our friendship, since I am not personally able to be there for her service today to say goodbye.

Our friendship was incredibly unique - I'll very likely never have another friend like her in my life, and it would be very remiss of me to not pass on the information.

To quote some of her last words to me on July 7: "I loved you Tiffany. I still do. Because you're flawed. And I'm flawed.. You're still my sister. And if you still need me to come up with a lie to get a venue cancelled, I would."

I still love you, too. You will be horribly missed.

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Attempt #1 at Maya's make-up from Borderlands 2.

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Hilarious.

Cats Traumatized by Baths Previously: Cats Who Have Had Enough

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I like my logic.

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I taught my BFF how to make ice. If you don't know, ask. It's a motha fuckin science, yo.

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I just got an email from Sephora and this was the first image in the email. Wtf am I looking at? Seriously.. wtf. I feel 13 years old with this, "I'm gonna pour this on your head!".. "Tee hee, ME TOO!" double entendre that is happening here.

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It's a hard knock life.

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#sorryimnotsorry

How I want my ex to end up

Some people:

Me:

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#word #salmahayek #dale #oye #yougonlearntoday

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What's the boner threshold once you hit 30 anyway?

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Amen.

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I KNOW.

I feel like OkCupid’s tagline should be “the cuter they are, the more likely they’re a sociopath!”

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So I tried to get a cute picture of my cat trying to blend in with his surroundings and nailed it. 20 minutes later Boobs sends me a drunken picture of us from last night’s shenanigans that I don’t remember and it hits me that apparently what they say is true: pets really do start to resemble their owners. Sigh.

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She looks so cute with her toys. And then you try to play with her, and DAT BREATH. The last picture is Boobs McGee trying to regain her composure after the foulness of my dog's mouth has infiltrated her face.

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My niece popped up on the couch with this ensemble. She definitely takes after my side of the family.

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Regal as fuuuuuuuuuuuuu