thevoilinauttheory

[thevoilinauttheory]

An Apology:

Hello from Outer Space!

I feel like I owe everyone here an apology, as I’ve fallen off the face of the earth yet again for a very long time - and possibly a longer time still.

But, first: A Happy belated New Year to all of you, and I hope this one treats you kindly.

Next: I’m so sorry about my absence, to all of my followers who’ve expected content from me and to everyone I’ve started RP threads with. I think about all of you daily, and I finally got the motivation and balls to put myself out here for judgements. I promise my disappearance has nothing to do with any of you personally, and I don’t hate anyone, and I haven’t forgotten about you.

I’ve been absent because of a few reasons, of which consist of 1) work. I’ve picked up a new job and it’s been taxing both emotionally and physically; 2) focusing on keeping my affiliate status and strict schedule on Twitch, as another source of income - which brings me to the biggest reasons why I’ve been gone:

My medical status has worsened in ways I didn’t expect; I’ve developed neuropathy in my hands and feet, which is slowing climbing up my arms and legs. The nerve pain has been devastating to my life and usual activities, and I’m thankful that I’ve been able to some relief from it with medication. I've got a lot of appointments set up in the future for testing and other developed symptoms and possible diagnoses (POTS and EDS specifically). I've been trying to practice using my hands and fingers again, through the inability to feel them and the occasional painful seizes, by turning to video games and crafts. I want to get back into XIV but I'm so scared of doing so with the way my hands have been, and I've been putting it off due to it - and I’ve been avoiding tumblr to avoid possible Endwalker spoilers.

I want to give special shout-outs and apologies to a few of you:

@yvesoix-sellemontiere, I’m so sorry about not saying anything, but I want you to know that I haven’t forgotten about you (and that I’m haunted daily about it) @lukawarrioroflight, thank you so much for your support and words - you’re not unheard, I promise @renofmanyalts, @don-pom, @ever-searching, @mathemagiks, @negevsthebear: I know I brought it up before, but I wanted to give an extra apology to all of you.

And of course @ all of my followers and new followers: thank you for your patience with me. I hope to be able to return to earth soon, I love you all and I can’t wait to see and talk to you again!

[thevoilinauttheory]

42 character development questions!

PHYSICAL PRESENCE AND GESTURE. 1. How do they move and carry themselves? Pace, rhythm, gestures, energy? 2. How much physical space do they use, active and at rest? 3. How do they position themselves in a group? Do they like to be the center of attention, or do they hang back at the edges of a crowd? 4. What is their size and build? How does it influence how they use their body, if it does? 5. How do they dress? What styles, colors, accessories, and other possessions do they favor? Why? 6. What are they like in motion–in different environments, and in different activities? What causes the differences between these? 7. How do they physically engage with other people, inanimate objects, and their environment? What causes the differences between these? 8. Where and when do they seem most and least at ease? Why? How can you tell? 9. How do they manifest energy, exhaustion, tension, or other strong emotions? 10. What energizes and drains them most? 11. How are they vocally expressive? What kind of voice, accent, tones, inflections, volume, phrases and slang, and manner of speaking do they use? 12. How are they bodily expressive? How do they use nonverbal cues such as their posture, stance, eyes, eyebrows, mouths, and hands? DISPOSITION AND TEMPERAMENT. 13. How do they greet the world — what is their typical attitude towards life? How does it differ in different circumstances, or towards different subjects? Why do they take these attitudes, and why do they change? How do these tend to be expressed? 14. What do they care deeply about? What kind of loyalties, commitments, moral codes, life philosophies, passions, callings, or spirituality and faith do they have? How do these tend to be expressed? 15. What kind of inner life do they have — rich and imaginative? Calculating and practical? Full of doubts and fears? Does it find any sort of outlet in their lives? 16. Do they dream? What are those dreams like? 17. Are they more shaped by nature or nurture — who they are, or what has happened to them? How have these shaped who they’ve become as a person? 18. What kind of person could they become in the future? What are some developmental paths that they could take, (best, worst, most likely?) what would cause them to come to pass, and what consequences might they have? What paths would you especially like to see, and why? CONNECTIONS WITH OTHERS. 19. How do they behave within a group? What role(s) do they take? Does this differ if they know and trust the group, versus finding themselves in a group of strangers? Why? 20. What kind of individual relationships do they have with others, and how do they behave in them? How are they different between intimate relationships like friends, family, and lovers versus more impersonal relationships? 21. What kind of relationships do they tend to intentionally seek out versus actually cultivate? What kind of social contact do they prefer, and why? 22. How do people respond to them, and why might these responses differ? 23. How do they respond to difficult social moments? What makes them consider a social situation difficult? 24. How do they present themselves socially? What distinguishes their “persona” from their “true self”, and what causes that difference? 25. What do they need and want out of relationships, and how do they go about getting it? 26. How do they view and feel about relationships, and how might this manifest in how they handle them, if it does? ACTIVITIES AND PREFERENCES. 27. What do they strongly like and dislike, in any category? Why? 28. What are they likely to do if they have the opportunity, resources, and time to accomplish it? Why? 29. What kind of activities, interests, and hobbies do they have? What significance and impact do these have in their lives, both positive and negative? 30. What is their preferred level of activity and stimulation? How do they cope if they get either too little or too much? 31. Is there anything that counts as a “dealbreaker” for them, positively or negatively? What makes things go smoothly, and what spoils an activity or ruins their day? Why? 32. Do they have any “props” that are a significant part of their life, identity, activities, or self-presentation somehow? What are they, how are they used, and why are they so significant? How would these props’ absence impact them, how would they compensate, and why? THINKING AND LEARNING. 33. How do they learn about the world–what is their preferred learning style? Hands-on learning with trial and error? Research, reading, and note-taking? Observation or rote memorization? Inductive or deductive reasoning? Seeking patterns and organization? Taking things apart and putting them back together? Creative processing via discussing, writing about, or dramatizing things? 34. How do they understand the world–what kind of worldview and thought processes do they have? Why? 35. How and why do they internalize knowledge? What effect has that had on them? 36. How much do they rely on their minds and intellect, versus other approaches like relying on instinct, intuition, faith and spirituality, or emotions? What is their opinion on this? 37. Have they had any special education or training that colors their means of learning about or understanding the world? Conversely, do they lack some kind of education considered essential in their world? What kind of impact has this addition or lack had on them? 38. Is there anything they wish they could change about their worldview or thought processes? What, and why? 39. What sort of questions or thoughts recur in their lives, either specifically or as a theme? Why are these never answered, or answered permanently to their satisfaction? 40. What do they wonder about? What sparks their curiosity and imagination, and why? How is this expressed, if it is? FREE FOR ALL. 41. What associations do they bring to mind? Words or phrases, images, metaphors or motifs? Why? 42. I have a question of my own!

[thevoilinauttheory]

Church of the Waking Dream

[ heyyyy finally got around to finishing this too! but there goes my energy for posting things for the day 😂 ]

[ response for @the-children​‘s Nightmare Before Endwalker event, regarding this post belonging to @the-waking-dream​~ ]

==

"This had to be a dream", he thought to himself. For why else would he awake every time with no nightmares to plague him? It had to be a dream. He'd wander in the woods and come across that sorry excuse for a corpse - his corpse. Yet it did not bother him, it phased him little aside from a soft smile. It was funny at first. Him? Dead? He had originally thought this story a nightmare, but it truly was a dream- perhaps literal, but metaphorical as well. He was alone, he was forgotten, he was finally - after all this time - finally dead. He had lived thirty years too long, had been driven by his own madness, his will, his ambitions… the need to survived waned more and more the longer it went on, of course.

But here he was.

It looked to be a painful death, one that he would never remember or never know. Is this what happened in dreams when you are awake? The story continues on, and by the time he sleeps, it has made its way to that one spot again. He wished he could stay ignorant, but the curiosity made its own excuses - if he was dead, then where exactly was he? He had believed in the Heavens and Hells of the Twelve, but this did not fit the description of any of them - nor was this some reincarnation, some cleansing in the lifestream - he would've known if so, he thought. So he wasn't dead. There was no explanation for it all. What was he seeing in front of him, then? If it was him, even. He pulled the pocketwatch from his pocket, looking at the time. It was stuck at the same time he had arrived at first… mid-afternoon. When did he arrive, though? It felt like… forever. Three or four days if he had to take a guess, based on the amount of times he slept. The smallest hand of the three marked that day as Darksday. What was he doing then?

He woke up again. It felt wonderful to wake up to the sound of the rain rather than the sound of his own screams. Maybe he would wander into the woods again. He stepped outside again. The rain had never felt so nice, he usually would draw the hood of his robes up - but today was different, like every other day. There was a pulse of light from above, in the cloudless sky and miracle rain, it shifted with every color a Spoken could see. Of course, the deep pit settled in his stomach when he had seen the writhing, winding, wriggling entity that made its home there. He was curious as to what it was, how it got there; and yet, the more he watched it entangling itself, only to uncoil - then wreathed, only to untwine; the more he realized that this dream was a nightmare. The peace of the danger made his blood run cold - this town was so… sleepy. No one seemed concerned about that being in the sky, ripping a hole there. Did he see it get larger? He rubbed his eye - the colors hurt. Then came the sleeplessness - it didn't matter whether he did or not, he was always pulled to the same spot in the woods; smiled at his own bloody corpse, then opened his eyes to find himself back in the town, standing in the center. Was he always there? Did he simply get visions when he walked around?

He walked to the woods.

How many times had he seen this scene? "How did I die?" He spoke to himself, if only to hear a sound - it had been too quiet. He opened his eyes.

Back in the town square.

It was driving him mad. He was absolutely losing his mind. Where was he? How did he get here? Could he even get back home? …Where was home, anyways? He focused on his husband, hoping the thought would bring him back to reality. He knew his name… but what did he look like? The image was fuzzy. He looked down at his watch.

It was mid-afternoon on Darksday.

He had never thought that the company of others would be nice about now. His only company was that little voice that heightened his paranoia. That made him frantic and frenzied. Something! Anyone! Just a damn voice, not even to him - just something other than the rain. Other than the voice that drove him to his wits end. Other than the church bells--

Church bells?

His eye turned to the road - three people, three honest-to-gods people - were traveling, were moving faster than the monochrome town he stayed in. The thought of their robes - his own robes, even - skipped his mind; how they were just as white and pristine.

“Whoa — easy, my child. There’s no need to rush, you’ll trip on the wet stone!”

The voice of another person called out to him as he tried to run. He wasn't made for running, though, and by the time he had reached them, he had to lean over to catch his breath. He would have given the man a skeptical stare for the child remark, but he was too damned relieved to see another soul. That smile he was given once he recovered reminded him of someone, but he couldn't place who - blonde hair and all. "A- Apologies… it has been a while for me to talk to another - may I ask your name?" “I’m Father Darren — and you?” "Maximiloix. I- I cannot believe… haha--" He choked out a laugh. "Please… bear with me, I simply cannot hold in my thoughts." He told the Father what he was witnessing, what was happening - what was happening? He had woken up so many times.

"This.. Is this a dream? I must know…" “You poor, weary soul — you have been Dreaming your entire life. You’re only just now beginning to wake up.”

He was? It didn't feel much different. Not yet. Not yet. He wanted to wake up, to let this cycle end - he wanted to return to his nightmares, to his family, to his home and paperwork and reports; all of the important things he was avoiding.

It's time to wake up. It's time to wake up.

[thevoilinauttheory]

Plot & Story Meme | Maximiloix

[ this has been in my drafts for two years now... i think it’s time to finally finish it - this was one i really wanted to do, but obviously, for the life of me, i cannot remember who tagged me - so, if you find this meme interesting, by all means, steal it from me! ]

ONE PLACE

◆ Ishgard - where the story began, where it ended; a place full of dreadful memories, and yet he cannot think to leave it and those he knew behind. where the story began again, where it continues to be; the only place to know and understand the struggles, and he cannot stay away as much as he will try - there are people who need him.

TWO VILLIANS

◆ Himself - the madness began to set in the moment it happened, it creeped on him, stole his mind; seven days of torment and grief, the eighth stole his heart and gave himself into what gifts he had. he had to fix this. he had to. there was no other way. if he survived... perhaps he will try for even more limits to break. ◆ Corvus - he stole everything, all of his work, all of his passions; he destroyed everything he worked so hard to accomplish. disrespected the space he had opened up to him and them. he was gone now, but the torment of that moment remains. how could forgive such a thing? how could he forget? 

THREE RELATIONSHIPS

◆ Maximiloix and Adeline - she was beauty, she was grace, several times she decked him in the face. he deserved those times, he knew that. young, stupid; how could he not fall in love? how she gave up everything she knew just for him; to live in squalor, to fall ill. she gave him everything. her love, her children, her life fell into his hands and she would not let him do anything about it. ◆ Maximiloix and Cassandra - she took him in, under the guise of love, under the guise of salvation; with her help, he could see his children again. time and time again did she abuse him with the power she held over him, treated him more like a servant than a lover. then he heard it, he heard it... she was married already, she would take vengeance over those that did her a disservice, people lost their lives over her. he took his chance. he would get away or die trying. left alone in her manor did he take every piece of value, took anything that he could sell or fence... and left her there, at the alter. ◆ Maximiloix and Caromont - it was love at first meal, never had he felt so connected, so known; so absolutely and utterly loved by another. if there was such a thing as soulmates, he had found his. what a tragedy, a story with no happy ending. why did he do it? it wasn’t worth it. why did he do it?

FOUR ITEMS

◆ A deck of old tarot cards - well used, well loved, well despised. the mark of an astrologian. they are handmade, hand drawn, so wonderfully crafted and beautiful; worn away with use and age. ◆ Marked maps - a hobby. he would say for research, but adventure was always his passion when he had started off with it; something new and exciting at every turn. for research he would say. for fun, he would not; though he displayed what treasures he had found with fondness on a shelf in his office. ◆ A collection of numbered books - journals, reports, catalogues and theories. all of them numbered neatly, in order, by date. never would he lose one. never. he had worked too hard for this, worked too hard to get credit for his works, to prove his existence and knowledge. they asked his secret, but he would not tell. he was losing his mind, losing his sleep over it. number four was missing. ◆ A rusted lance - he could not bear to part with it. rusted from neglect, stained with blood he could not clean. a reminder. a constant reminder of his mistake. what he had to fix. it was fixed... but to what cost? he was not the same now.

FIVE CHARACTERS

◆ Alderic Fauvier - his brother, his friend. he could have saved him. he could have, if he were more diligent. he would never make that mistake again. ◆ Frederick Galeaux - his boss. the stables were hard work, but it was honest work around creatures that he loved. it was tiring. he was getting too old for this. ◆ Jadeinne Corbeau - his family, his friend. no matter the methods he believed in, she was always there for him. offered to help his wife, though adeline had denied it. for her help, for her caring spirit; he would take care of her son. ◆ Jeramias Harold - an adventurer, his friend. or so he had thought. the man had not slighted him personally... but to hurt one of his family in such a way, he did not wish to be around him. but he promised to take care of her son, to make sure he was well. he would never break that promise. not until his death. ◆ Shango Thango - the first friend he had in thirty years. the conversation was never dull, never tedious. it was worth his time. his time which he gave freely to him. perhaps... he was even happy, just to see him. just to know that he would not judge him, no matter the situation.

SIX MOMENTS

◆ The Dragon's Teeth, The Dragon's Claws - was it not enough? he killed that dragon at the cost of his brother’s life. what did he get for it? nothing. absolutely nothing. barely enough for a sennight’s worth of food for his family. what a joke. what pain he felt. what would he tell his wife? he could not help by break down. ◆ The First Mistake - how could he have done that? how could he have taken the life of his most beloved? it haunts him. every night he sees it over again. fix it, fix it, fix it. ◆ You are the Maker of your own world - what power, what a rush to feel the strain boiling his blood; he accepted it, he needed it. then there was more. and more. and more. magic and aether filled his veins, he needed it. more. more. he could fix everything like this. more. more. he craved it, he breathed it; let it in, let it take over... the darkness had never felt so comfortable before. more. more. ◆ Candy? Not so much. - to think that a wonderous friend could be made by the offering of something as simple as candy. the man read him like a book on first meeting. how? how did he do that? he was proud in the fact that he did not show his emotions, even the surprise was hidden under a neutral expression. he declined. he was not a fan of sugary foods. shango begged to differ. ◆ This is the moment I have worked for - the moment was taken from him. ruined. he would do anything to get his way, even break the stoic nature for tears. but it was wrong. it was all wrong. it wasn’t ready yet. and he took it from him. he took it from him! he was filled with a rage that could not be quelled. a life for life, he would kill him where he stood if he showed his face again. ◆ Another's failure is my success - his grandson had broken through the block that stopped him from his research. found the things he was looking for. he failed in keep it contained. oh, but he would. yes, yes. more and more. this was the power he was looking for. he would have it for himself, the cost did not matter. he needed this.

SEVEN QUOTES

◆ "Hold on, we're almost there..." ◆ " The murderer will see them dead right next to their mother!" ◆ "My heart is on fire..." ◆ "My moon and stars… I’m sorry… please, please forgive me…" ◆ “He is not yours to burn! He is mine! NOT YOURS, MINE! ” ◆ "I have not felt such exhilaration in years..." ◆ "I am not stupid, I am mad. You were a fool to trust me in the first place."

[thevoilinauttheory]

okay so - very big thank yous to @kerensa-lacroix, which for some reason tumblr won’t tag properly (；′⌒`); and @tavard-ffxiv for making me feel much better about starting over

so! i’m very sorry to everyone who hadn’t seen their asks replied to, but i will reblog more in the future with a much better system to answering things (and think a little bit harder as to which ask memes to reblog so that i don’t overwhelm myself with prompts).

to my music request peeps! i have not forgotten about you! i’m trying to recover the hard drive that had the list of people i still needed to complete / what songs i’ve already used / what songs i had set aside - since i am now using a new computer and did not use Drive for it (which I am now regretting).

[thevoilinauttheory]

i've got thirty things in my inbox that i just cannot muster the energy to do, but i feel bad because it's been so long since i got them - is it rude or inconsiderate to delete them and start over with a less overwhelming way of answering them? i feel like it is but i know i might not ever get to them... "orz

[thevoilinauttheory]

[ weehhhhhh I finally made a carrd after days of working on it

In the list of characters that have completed pages:

Maximiloix Voilinaut

Ashley Tucker

Lothaire Voilinaut

Amosis

-

And incomplete ones that I’m currently working on but need more screenshots:

Danny

Kokhjin

- 

I can actually add two more characters to the list, but I’m not sure who to do - is there anyone that would be interested in seeing more detail in a character I have that I should do? (I, personally, was thinking Caromont and/or Theolaud - but I’m still on the fence, honestly, so if anyone has a suggestion or different character they’d like to see!) ]

[thevoilinauttheory]

Answer these and tag people you’d like to know better / catch up with!

[ As tagged by @lukawarrioroflight! I deleted the 9 part of tagging people, because there’s not many people to catch up with 😅 ]

LAST SONG:  Happy Accidents - Outwild, Inukshuk (from my stream last night, because it’s by NCS and I don’t want to get muted lol)

CURRENTLY READING: Everyone’s answers and prompts for @the-children‘s Nightmare Before Endwalker story!

CURRENTLY WATCHING: Rewatching Jojo’s Bizzare Adventure Part 4 with my spouse who hasn’t watched all of it yet!

CURRENTLY CRAVING: To stream more “orz

[ Tagging!: @renofmanyalts, @ever-searching, @mathemagiks, @donpom-loredex, and @rose-color-boy! ]

[thevoilinauttheory]

How Are You Ruined - Ashley Tucker

==

ruined by trauma

you cannot get over the past. you are constantly remembering, never forgetting. you cant live in the moment because the moment is not what brought you here. you are birthed, raised, and killed in the past. you will never get over what was done to you, be it big or be it small. you cannot escape what you refuse to confront.

==

[ ooo this one was spot on for him! ]

[ Take the quiz here! ]

[ Thank you so much for the tag, @nightshade-on-my-grave! ]

[ Tagging!: @renofmanyalts, @placesyoucallhome, @way-to-the-future, @illia-ast​, @crimsonfluidessence, @houserosaire, @blissfulxiv, @anika-ffxiv, @amdapori​, @ahlis-xiv, @istolin, @ka-ffxiv, @captainkurosolaire, @dawning-star, @labyrinthianthornes, @spellsandtales, and @ffxivtribehydrae​!

If you’ve already done this, feel free to tag me in a reblog of your post! And if I didn’t tag you, consider this an invitation to be tagged! ♪(´▽｀) ]

[thevoilinauttheory]

How Are You Ruined - Maximiloix Voilinaut

==

ruined by loneliness

you are so lonely. you are miserable in your solitude. you hate that you cannot bring yourself to reach out, to ask for help. you will be forgotten by all who never knew you. your biggest fear is that you will die alone, and you know this fear will be seen to fruition. you refuse to extend yourself beyond the box that others put you in. and it is a box that no one dare come near. you are lonely because you are afraid of yourself.

==

[ Hmm... I suppose? In the sense that he lost Caromont to his mistakes - but typically, he revels in the solitude. Then again, he does long for some company - but he ruins the chances by pushing people away. ]

[ Take the quiz here! ]

[ Thank you so much for the tag, @sundered-souls! ]

[ Tagging!: @lukawarrioroflight, @ever-searching, @mathemagiks, @yvesoix-sellemontiere, @halonic-rage, @the-baschet, @trishelle, @eligos-venator, @flood-of-shadow, @flint-and-fable, @flamesworn, @bek-sc, @waywardmender​, @athilthorne​, and @meandering-mind​!

If you’ve already done this, feel free to tag me in a reblog - and if I didn’t tag you, do it anyways and tag me! This is an invitation to being tagged by me! ♪(´▽｀) ]

[thevoilinauttheory]

[ Unfortunately, this is the closest I’ve got to a good headshot screen of Maximiloix on this computer “orz ]

[ As for a fact! Hmm... something new, something new... I’ve shared so much about him that I can hardly remember what I’ve shared! ]

[ Due to :spoiler: related content, Maximiloix does not actually need to eat to survive. He does not know this, because he’s never tried. Why would he? Food is good. ]

Hello everyone! I am doing a Giveaway/Art Raffle. Not of my art, but of the these amazing and lovely artists, @enderpyre, @placesyoucallhome and @somnomnus

The Prizes:

Plain Sketch Headshot from @enderpyre-art

As example I have a beautiful commission of Asdis

Chibi/Icon from @somniality

As example I have these spectacular arts (1) (2)

Rendered Headshot from @quinn-cassian

I don’t have a previous commission, but awesome arts here

How to Enter!

You must do the following:

Like This Post & Reblog with headshot of your FFXIV oc & one fact about them

Please let me know if you like from a main and reblog to sideblog

Multiple Entries are allowed if you have more than one OC, but you will only be able to win one prize from the drawing.

Last Day to Enter Drawing: October 26th 11:59 PM PST

[thevoilinauttheory]

It Was An Accident

[ for @the-children‘s Nightmare Before Endwalker, and as a response to @rodarin-calrise’s post here! ] 

[ i didn’t reblog it because of how long it’d all be and i am constantly anxious about taking up peoples’ dashboards lmao so i’m so sorry if this is done wrong in advance, i haven’t rp’d on tumblr in like... years and i feel awkward af but the adderall and need to write are curb-stomping the anxiety (okay this is like... half prompt half rp reply i’m so sorry) ]

[ this is in direct sequel to this prompt! ]

==

The first sign should have been that he woke up... semi-peacefully. No nightmares, nor terrors, nor screaming; he was startled awake by nearly falling out of his chair.

Gods, his head hurt. He couldn’t even rightly blame the drink for it - he drank far more than that on a daily basis... or maybe it was the withdrawal. No, it had to be the damned voices. He heard them again, and the more he blamed them, the more prominent they were.

He stuffed his hand into his pocket.

The watch chained to his belt said it was mid-afternoon, and yet... it was just as dark outside as it was when he arrived. What time was it when he arrived, even? He brushed himself off, straightened the bags that settled at his waist, and set to stepping outside of the inn... the thought still rattled.

What time was it when he checked in? How long was he asleep?

He couldn’t rightly remember.

It was still damp outside when he made it there. It killed whatever mood he could have had, really. And killed his hair too. He was trying deperately to cling to something small - his book came to mind, and he fished it out to begin writing in it again. All of the questions in his head.

“What time is it? Has it passed, even? Is there a fluctuation we should be aware of?” He could feel it - that something off, the one that crawled through his blood with a sickening ichor; it paced his own, matched his breathing. There it was again. “What is this feeling that keeps dragging its way into my throat? Should I be worried? Should I be scared? Should I embrace it? For it feels so much like...”

He stopped in front of a fountain, staring at the pearlescent water as if it’d give him answers. Watching it ripple as any other fountain would--

Pearls?

It shimmered, oily, like soap - waving an array of muted colors underneath the candlelight. How strange. How--

How could he even see it?

Maximiloix pulled his eye patch over his aetherial eye, revealing the world as it truly was - blinking to gather his bearings on the suddenly bright darkness that assaulted his vision. It was just the same. The water was like that of liquid pearls, how could he see it so clearly without sight? He slid the patch back over, now leaning back to write in his book again.

No, he was going to draw this. He needed some sort of evidence that he wasn’t as mad as he was being made seem - he stood for a few minutes, crudely sketching out the shape of the fountain, and the colors that plagued it. No, he wouldn’t let the curiosity end there, with a picture. He fumbled through his bags for the containers he brought. He was right in bringing materials to conduct research, an island that springs up over a literal night must have some interesting characteristics. It was before he could truly grab what he was looking for, that a hand had found itself firmly planted on his shoulder.

It was a simple gesture which had warranted the simplest of defenses - of course, Maximiloix was anything but “simple” and the fear that shot through him to rupture his deep concentration formed a splattering of flames that emanated from his feet and spread outward to gain distance on whatever creature or person had the utter audacity as to touch him.

What followed was a laugh - of course it was. Many found his defense funny in some strange way, and his eye found the perpetrator in the form of a man. Tall for a hyur... short, compared to himself. He tilted his head at him,

“Welcome to Westmoore~”

He had chimed. Some vague semblance of happiness found in the dreariness of the area - yet the expression on his face was devoid of any such emotion.

There was something wrong here. So very wrong. He couldn’t place it. He ignored it.

“Thank... you, I suppose.” What else was he supposed to say? The citizens had barely spoken a word to him, unless initiated himself. This man came from outright nowhere, spooked the magic right out of him, and suddenly... talks to him. He was torn between asking questions and keep silent. Something wasn’t right about this man - in fact, the voices-- Maximiloix rubbed at his forehead to try and quiet them down. “Apologies for the... display. I am Maximiloix Voilinaut, sent by the Maelstrom to... investigate the place, I suppose. I- I am sorry, did I catch your name?”

It was foggy, the voices, the sights - the aether that faded in and out, with colors the swayed as much as he felt like he currently was.

“I’m Rodarin Calrise, the Mayor of Westmoore. Come — let’s get you settled in.”

Right. Rodarin - had he heard the name before? He couldn’t remember. Everything was beginning to get... hazy.

“Settled in? Oh, there is no need - I have found my own way for the time being.”

But he insisted... and he couldn’t refuse. His feet followed the Mayor regardless of his qualms. He had only been this entranced once in his life, and... well, it didn’t end up too terrible, he had thought. Not that he truly noticed it all.

“I will say... time is easy to lose track of here, is it not? Or...” Maximiloix drew the watch from his pocket again. The time hadn’t changed. “...Or it cannot be lost at all, can it.”

What was going on? Why did he continue to follow? This all should have settled wrongly in his stomach. There it was again, the cold ache that chewed through him - that turned the ice in his bones to water, it heated him from the inside. Was he sweating again? What in the hells was happening?

They turned the opposite direction of their intended destination - where he stared at the sign in disbelief, and yet... he could not question it. The words that came from his mouth were of an entirely different subject. His mind had shut down all sense, and defaulted to his usual state of... conducting research.

“Do you find that the characteristics of your flora and fauna may differ from that of Vylbrand’s? Despite arriving in the area... it would seem strange some magically appearing island would have the same as us. Much like Val when it was rediscovered - the entirety of its character had shifted in the short time it was gone. New creatures, new habitats, even a change in how magic worked within its bounds. Despite the usage of aetherytes on it, teleporting to it still remains largely impossible - what of your island? Is yours just the same?”

The error of attempting to compute the danger he was walking into resulted in a string of nonsense, the floodgate of voices released with no filter - and for a moment, anyone that had known his grandson would know exactly where the man obtained his penchant for not shutting up.

His questions were cut... somewhat short by the pain in his head, the nagging and yelling and gods-awful screeching picked up again. He kept the grunt of pain to himself, but when he was able to focus again...

“A forest?” He hummed under his breath. Nothing was adding up anymore. Was anything adding up before? If it was, it wasn’t now. He looked at his watch. No time had passed. It was broken. Or time was broken. Something was broken. Where were they headed? He couldn’t remember. Was he going senile already? He predicted at least another decade before that.

What was happening - what was happening -

Maximiloix shook his head to clear himself of the fog, blinking the haze from his eyes to be met face to face with... what was this mess? He looked down at himself. The melting disfigured man shaped pile had his colors. That was his signature he was looking at, but no. That was impossible. Instead of being deterred by the sight, by even the creature that was supposedly eating chunks of the damned thing; he stepped forward. He moved towards it. The curiosity, it would kill him in the end, wouldn’t it... and yet, he didn’t care.

“Welcome back to Westmoore. I hope you enjoy your stay. Try to avoid the Woods next time, won’t you?”

The voice of the Mayor cackled in his ears as he tried to make heads or tails of what he was looking at; his eyes turned up to a face of sharpened teeth - the predator seeing its prey. And he...

His own laugh bubbled up from his chest, through the searing and burning pain in his chest - he laughed, he laughed. There was no one here to be scared of this unexplained jovial attitude - there was no one to look at him strangely but the strangeness that surrounded him. He laughed as his knees hit the grass, as he clawed into his own chest, as the edges of his vision began to grow dark.

“This is no nightmare - this better be the best damned sleep of my life!” He laughed. And laughed. And laughed more through his words, up until there was no air for him to laugh with - up until he passed out there.

[thevoilinauttheory]

Candlelight Cove

[ mweee for the event that is Nightmare Before Endwalker, ran by @the-children, and companion to this piece! ]

==

Staring at the ship made the dread in his stomach dig a deeper pit - the sailors and pirates of Limsa who knew him already knew that he was deathly terrified of the ocean; they made fun of him for it. Some powerful mage! Only to be brought low by water only deep enough to drown a drunkard. Now they got to witness it; his face turning white at the mere thought of stepping on a ship that was not in the air.

“Y’sure yer good fer th’trip there, Master Voilinaut?” “...”

Sure, he never liked ships - nor the ocean, nor sailing - but this... was a much different dread sinking in. Something was wrong here. Maybe Lothaire was right - he should have at least tried to get some sleep. A “bad feeling” didn’t cut it. This must have been what Quinn felt like, any time something bad was about to happen. He felt absolutely ill to his stomach, and that was a rare feeling in itself - he did not like it, not one bit. Yet it was the rarity of that feeling that pushed him to take the next step onto the ship without a word. The thought of his missing students became second to the pure morbid curiosity he felt. Where was he going that would cause such a feeling? Would he ever feel something like this again? The thought of the answer “no” is what drove him to find a somewhat comfortable and out of the way spot to stand and stew in his thoughts.

“Would there truly be answers there? What am I to find, if not my students? What caused the appearance of this place to begin with? Is it something I can use? Something I can hold? I should catalogue this...”

Each one raced in his mind faster than the last, even as he pulled a book from one of his satchels to write down his questions - he wasn’t even certain he managed to capture all of them. 

==

He would’ve thought the feeling false if it did not continue to gnaw at him - the underlying horror, the deep secrets that piled on top of his own. Perhaps that is what was the cause of it all... finding something or someone - or someones - that were like himself. If they were, if it was, then he should have known to turn back... but he didn’t.

He stared at the seemingly innocuous port town and its inhabitants; the adventurers too, who were far too excitable about exploring a new location with little hesitation. Did none of them have a sense of caution? How hypocritical of him, he realized, as he took another step forward. Everything was peaceful, wasn’t it? Not every location had to be filled with danger - this town could be spared, even if another was under duress. 

It was with each further step that the false security proved falser and falser. The signs that hung, telling tale of turning back; the adventurers that had poured out of the ship suddenly gone; the eerie mist that lingered about, only fading with the dim candles that lit the aptly named Candlelight Cove. Something was... horribly wrong here. It gave him the worst headache, paired with the ever growing voices - whispers - shouts - in his head; mingling and screaming and fighting and--

“Will it ever quiet down out here...?”

His own voice spilled past his teeth in an attempt to hear his own thoughts, and while it was quiet in itself, it felt so loud in the emptiness of the humid air.

It was dark.

When did it get dark? He didn’t quite remember, and so he turned on his heels to try and find what could be an inn or tavern - gods, a drink sounded like pure heaven at the moment. A drink... and maybe his grandson’s advice. Yet sleeping felt like the worst option. 

It took some stumbling about, but he managed to find one; and promptly ignored the stares on his character... not that he could see them, mind. He was too focused on trying to get situated with his surroundings to truly care about the sudden silence and turned heads. He already knew he was out of place, he was out of place in his own home too. Then there was that aching feeling, it skittered through his veins with a darkness like his blood - it danced with his nerves; as he took the key to his room, his eye turned over the small crowd. Perhaps it was the fact they were caught gawking, perhaps it was the gaze filled with just as much emptiness as was given to him - his own demons resting in his expression.

When the heads were cleared of their view of him, he made his way to his assigned room... and threw himself down into the nearest chair. He ran his nails through his hair, combing the sweat that was beginning to stick to it out. This was a new feeling... it wasn’t as anything as drastic as terror... but it was... uncomfortable. It was looming over him, this stifling presence that made the sounds in his head go crazy - how in the hells was he supposed to relax like this?

“...I should have brought Caromont with me...”

He mused to himself. No matter the events, his husband was always a comforting body - even if he continued to push him away. In the face of unease, perhaps he would have embraced him instead. Thinking about him quieted the room some, enough to lull him off for a bit - ready for the nightmares that would plague him this night as well.

[thevoilinauttheory]

The Missing Students

[ i would’ve posted a nice screenshot with this, but my fingies have not been nice to me recently and writing itself is very difficult (and so i am now late to the party with jumping in on the event but i wanted to get it out anyways to at least say that i was here lol). apparently typing is very hard when you can’t feel your fingers ]

[ this is for an ongoing event/thread started by @the-children​! while this specific piece was not in response to one of the public threads, another should be up sometime today regarding one of them - and if i can get my fingies to work, maybe a second one too. thank you so much for the opportunity to join in! ]

==

“Grandfather?” Lothaire peered around the corner of one of the library’s entrances, keeping a close eye on Maximiloix as the man paced back and forth down the library’s hall - wearing holes in the floor during a frenzied one-sided conversation with himself. He spoke to himself, low, under his breath, muttering like the already-mad man he was. His thoughts weren’t so easily broken, and he continued to gesture vaguely with his inaudible words until Lothaire was directly in front of him. Maximiloix stopped right in his grandson’s face, staring blankly at him for a moment in some much needed silence before he took a large step back. “Is there something you need?” “Uh, yeah. The library. The kids need it for, y’know… studying? You’re kinda taking up the whole place. And you’re scaring them. Can you pace elsewhere, please?” Another blank stare - it was always so unsettling, having his grandfather look at him like another victim. Whatever thought was going through his head wasn’t a good one, he knew that much. “Actually.” “I knew it.” “This is a matter I should be speaking with you about.” “Great.” “Sit down.” Lothaire let out a heavy sigh, throwing himself down on the nearest chair - it had been a long day already, he didn’t want to deal with this more than he had to. He watched as Maximiloix began pacing back and forth again, much to his dismay.

“Are all of the children here accounted for?” “Of course - we just did roll earlier today.” “Both for the school and orphanage?” “I don’t like where this is going, but yes. We make certain to count heads when we can, especially during meals.” “And your own children?” “Misha would have both my heads if I lost track of even one of them for half a second.” Lothaire snorted, folding his arms over his chest. He shook his head as the realization sunk in a little more. “What’s going on? And have you checked your school?” “Mm.” Maximiloix stopped in the middle of the hall, turning his head to the opposite side of the room towards a slowly dying fireplace. “...Some of my students have gone missing, yes. But there is a strangeness to the story that I… am not fond of. When I had visited the school last, Reinaire relayed to me that the same students had been missing their class - those students were ones that ended up being housed in the Featherfall Orphanage. She wrote it off as them being adopted and having moved to a home with their own schooling system but…” His eye turned over to his grandson now, watching the anxiety creep on him slowly. “...well, I made my way there to ask them of what happened - and what am I to find but a horror story in waiting. Missing children, one account of a caretaker ripped to shreds; and among the gone, my students. So. Keep your eyes on them. I mean it, Lothaire.” “Y- Yeah… All eyes on them, got it. I’ll let Misha know. I take it… you’re going to try and find the missing students?” “I made my mistake with Quinn and his friends, I will not let the same mistake happen twice. Yes, I am going to attempt finding them… on top of the Maelstrom breathing down my neck for aid. Apparently another island has so graciously appeared in a group of storms, and the first they turn to is the expert in magic - and while I am more than confident in my abilities… I cannot fathom why they would believe I have the answers at my fingertips.” Lothaire leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees - he wanted to help in this mystery where he could, but he had too much on his plate as it was; and he certainly wasn’t going to leave his husband to run the place on his own time. “Do you think they’re connected?” “Hm?” “Children disappearing all of a sudden, murders of caretakers, this unexplainable appearance of an entire damned island?” “While you likely are not the first to think so, you are the first in my presence to - and… ugh. I suppose I should not discredit the idea. It is a little far-fetched, if I am to believe it, but if that is the first lead I have, then I suppose I should return to the Maelstrom and let them know that I am willing to lend my expertise where I can.” Lothaire heaved himself to his feet, leaning back to stretch as he got ready to step out again. “Well, I’ll at least let Misha know to be vigilant in counting heads; and I’ll rope Caromont into it too - good, uh… good luck.” “I am going to need it, if the good luck is coming from you.” Maximiloix snorted. “Oh, ah. Lothaire.” “Hm?” “...Have you been hearing… anything strange, recently?” “You’re likely having another hallucination, Grandfather - how long has it been since you’ve slept.” “Eight days, but no. This is different.” “Gods, without a beat either… no, I haven’t. No voices. No noises. Everything’s been normal. Well, it’s not going to be now, since you brought all of this up.” Lothaire shook his head. “Ignore the voices and get some sleep before you leave, okay?” “Like hells I will.” He sighed, waving Lothaire off without another word. 

“Difficult to ignore the multitudes of childrens’ voices at once, but… certainly is not much different than what I am used to, I suppose.”

[thevoilinauttheory]

To the Very Core

[ FFxivWrite2021 Prompt 31: Extra Credit ]

[ Content Warnings: None! ]

[ Just a little thing considering that I saw the entry pretty late lol not going to include it in my list, just wanted to get a few words out~ (‾◡◝) ]

==

To the grave light, and all its brilliant darkness:

Give to me your hushed name, your murmured colors

Give to me your gentle body, your harsh words

Even in the distant future, your face is one I see in my dreams

Even in the forgotten past, your love is one that sticks to my tongue

To hear you call for me is to feel what I have lost long ago

To see you near me is to feel what I knew I had-

Deep down-

To my very core.

To the brilliant darkness, and all its grave light:

Give to me your memories, the breath of life you cannot forget

Give to me your mind, the kindness you will share with others

Even now, I can see you trying - see you persevere 

Even then, I can see you rising with the visions of a future yet to come

To have you by my side is to feel a love I had so long forgotten

To hold your hand is to know that this is real-

Deep down-

To the very core.

[thevoilinauttheory]

FFXIVWRITE2021 RECAP MASTERLIST

[ It’s been a month you guys! Wow, I was actually scared for a moment that I couldn’t be able to keep up - and I know the quality of my work started to hit the fan towards the end due to some medical complications. But looking back on the past FFXIVWrite challenges, I want to say that I’ve definitely improved! It was so fun to get to know your characters a little more, and even get to know new ones along the way too!! Don’t mind me as I reblog literally everyone’s recaps as I come across them so that I may immerse myself in the prompts I missed! ]

[ Each title of the prompts are named after songs (with said songs linked in each prompt), because I love associating music with my writing! Also I’m really bad at titles lol. Even if the prompt may not be for you, I highly recommend each song I’ve posted! It was really cool to see a lot of you jumping on the music bandwagon as well, because I love hearing what y’all like and what you associate with each piece or character! ]

[ Little notes! Characters listed will be my characters only, if there are NPCs or other characters, they won’t be listed here (unless the character belongs to another person). Content warnings are at the top of each prompt, please read them before reading the prompt, so that you don’t walk into anything you might not want to read. ]

==

Prompt #1 - Foster: First Day of My Life Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #2 - Aberrant: Fire Characters: Ashley Tucker

Prompt #3 - Scale: Our Own House Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #4 - Baleful: Long Way Down Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut

Prompt #5 - Extra Credit: Laughter Lines Characters: Ashley Tucker

Prompt #6 - Avatar: A Sky Full of Stars Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #7 - Speculate: Kill Your Heroes Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut (cameo: Lothaire Voilinaut)

Prompt #8 - Adroit: survivin’ Characters: Ashley Tucker

Prompt #9 - Friable: Magnum Bullets Characters: Kokhjin Qalli

Prompt #10 - Heady: Choke Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut

Prompt #11 - Preaching to the Choir: My Fault Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut

Prompt #12 - Extra Credit: Mercy Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #13 - Oneirophrenia: High Characters: Ashley Tucker

Prompt #14 - Commend: Good Grief Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut

Prompt #15 - Thunderous: My Body Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #16 - Crane: Black Water Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #17 - Destruct: Deconstruct Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #18 - Devil’s Advocate: Carried Away Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Mayve McRae

Prompt #19 - Extra Credit: Paper Heart Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #20 - Petrichor: Dirty Paws Characters: Liliah’to Zhwan

Prompt #21 - Feckless: Punching in a Dream Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut

Prompt #22 - Fluster: After School Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #23 - Soul: Soul Meets Body Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Lothaire Voilinaut

Prompt #24 - Illustrious: Winter Sound Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #25 - Silver Lining: The One Moment Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #26 - Extra Credit: The World at Large Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut (cameo: unnamed business partner)

Prompt #27 - Benthos: Electric Love Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

Prompt #28 - Bow: Holding On Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut

Prompt #29 - Debonair: The Funeral Characters: Cedrenaux Voilinaut

Prompt #30 - Abstracted: Northern Lights Characters: Maximiloix Voilinaut, Caromont Allard

==

[ Here are links to the tags for the previous years prompts! ]

2020 2019 2017

[thevoilinauttheory]

Northern Lights

[ FFxivWrite2021 Prompt 30: Abstracted ]

[ Content Warnings: None that I can think of! ]

[ Last one done! I would’ve done more but I am losing feeling in my hands for some reason so typing is very hard atm “orz ]

==

Without fail, he was always caught staring.

When Maximiloix had reopened his school after the week-long absence, he did his best to teach with his head above the water. His mind, however, always shut itself down if he remained idle too long. He’d stare at the wall and let the nightmares play in real time, waiting for either his eyes to burn out or for his head to hit the desk - or for his students to snap him back to reality.

==

He kept his thoughts in check by doing selfless deeds - for selfish reasons. With each new delivery of supplies to the Brume, he’d count another day of freedom from his mind. Gather more wood; gather more clothes; food, make repairs, learn to weave; back to teaching again - he’d teach two, maybe three, classes at once. After that, he’d continue his research, walk the world for a bit, and avoid the thing that always brought him the most dread - sleep.

==

It was so painful… so *utterly* painful. He watched as his once dead husband lived life as he should have - free and happy. He shouldn’t have felt this much pain, really, there was no sense to it - why did it hurt so much for Caromont to not remember? If his spell was to end in his own death, why would it matter? It didn’t end in his death, however. That was the pain. He was alive to see and witness just how alone he had made himself. He watched Caromont happily chat away with their grandsons, helping Misha in the kitchen as he usually did when they visited. His laugh was a song he wished others could hear, his violet eyes were so bright whenever he did - while he could not see him now, as he once did, he could watch the waves of aether dance with their owner. They were just as beautiful as the body; bright and bold; gentle, too. He saw the waves turn towards him. He didn’t have to see his face to know that he was being smiled at.

He was caught staring.

==

They were alone, for once. Standing beside the fireplace - he wasn’t even certain why they were here, specifically. All he knew was that Caromont was staring at him… just as he would for him. There was a part of his husband that many didn’t get to see, the one he was looking at right now. The excitement, bouncing and full of energy, turning to a contemplative elegant look. Even the waves of his aether were now just lulls of tides against a shore, no longer crashing about, but seemed to move with the intention of hypnotising him. It was working. He didn’t even dare to move when he saw Caromont’s hand raise towards his face - he simply froze still, stiff, when his palm laid against his cheek; his thumb gently caressed under his eye. He wanted to speak, to move away, to ask what he thought he was doing… but it was rare that he *ever* got a moment like this with him. Something quiet and safe. “I like seeing you look at me like this.” “What… do you mean?” “Don’t think I don’t notice when you drift away from the star for a little bit! Always so lost in your thoughts, and always staring at me.” Maximiloix pursed his lips, turning his eyes away to avoid seeing how he was being watched. “...I like it. When I turn my head and you’re right there. It feels nice to have all of your attention like that.” “Mm.” He let a huff out from his nose, trying to hide his embarrassment to no avail. When he turned his eyes back, he only found Caromont staring at him still - where he usually would have floundered and try to back away; he only found himself captivated again. For a moment, he lost himself again; not to his thoughts, but to the brilliant colors in front of him.