#~ I will never see it the same again 😍 ~
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Not me watching Santa Clause 3 for the plot…
#~ first year watching SC3 with this knowledge ~#~ I will never see it the same again 😍 ~#ann margret#medda larkson#newsies#newsies 1992#92sies#santa clause 3#sylvia newman
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ok life really is just a mosaic of all the people you've loved and lost 😍😍😍😍😍
#me over the weekend: oh i'm so over him#me yesterday: DEFINITIVELY NOT OVER HIM. and also probably seeing him thursday 😍😍😍😍😍#because the person he's dating is in the same performance thing as me 😍😍😍😍😍#also keep thinking about how hard it is to find a person i feel good abt creating with#bc the person i feel was my creative/writing soulmate is no longer in my life and it's very sad#because like. Wow did that shit we make together rule#BUT ALSO THAT'S MY BAD AND IT WAS MY FAULT so i can't even be too sad#but truly no one understood me creatively like that ever before and probably never will again#so now the idea of working with other people who i'm not on that wavelength with as well as#actively working with people like that currently#is like pulling teeth#(AGAIN THAT WAS MY BAD SO I ONLY HAVE MYSELF TO BLAME BUT STILL)#all this to say. i want to quit theatre forever i think. < girl who spent like 20k on an honours theatre degree#in another world i am a beloved streamer. unfortunately i'm too Live with my parents and Hate pc gaming for that#maia.txt#also the ONLY reason i'm sad about these people is because i keep subconsciously self harming with#dreams about them where we make up and are in love SO IT'S NOT MY FAULT
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girlhood
#i have to fly out to capetown to see mother and im literally debating if i could land in the morning and leave at night on the same day#like. anything longer than that is going to ruin my year.#when she called and did her “katherine. you have to be here on the 10th” i literally sobbed in my bed for the rest of the day 😍😍😍#not dyeing my hair black for a year and its getting lighter and lighter everyday and i look like her again#and my therapist telling me “you need to do things for yourself.” but like can i? sorry that woman traumatised me and i actually cant :)#like everything i do is informed by her#I'm going to go and just like everytime the only way to keep my sanity is to mirror her. talk and sit and speak and read and eat like her#and its such a terrifying experience bc i remember that im capable of emulating her viciousness and maybe i am my mother's daugher 🤢🤢🤢#and im going to come back and its going to take fucking months for me to feel like myself again#“oh you look so beautiful just like your mother” i hope you DIE lol !!! the fact that my conception of beauty was shaped by her#growing up with this cruel beautiful detached woman and realising that at the intersection of beauty and wickness is a lifetime of pain#and still being so desperate for her approval- for any metaphysical proximity to her that i felt elated when#people would tell me i look like her. that it meant i was also beautiful like her and maybe she'll love me a little for it#but now i know for a fact that i do look like her and it makes saliva swell under my tongue - that moment right before you throw up-#when people mention it 😍#last time i was in capetown my optic neuritis flared up (and i know for a fact it was that it was ms-stress related from having to see her)#and i thought i hid it so well even though i had near constant headaches & lethargy until she said “katherine give me the red notebook”#and i knew that she knew all along. it was so acutely humiliating standing there and knowing she knows i cant see which one is the red one#and she tilted her head and said “whats the matter? do you not know what red looks like?”#im never going to have kids. my mother and i read eachother so well it can only mean im never too far removed from becoming her#lol!!!!!!!!!
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omg this time last year i was trying to figure out which fic i would write a christmas fic for 💙 ☺️ what a journey 🥹 i am never doing that again ☺️
#but it was fun!!#but never again#so much cheating happened on that Google form 🫵#it would be interesting to see the results from a tumblr poll with the same options but literally I think there were 30 options on the 1st#and tumblr only has 12 options lmao#was just thinking of her fondly tho#that was really fun for me 💙😍
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I love a gooey part 💕
Pucking Rookie IV
Read Pucking Rookie here | ~8k words
From me: slow burning!!!
Warnings: ANGST violence. CW: Signs of abuse.
Summary: Harry is very hot. Very sweet. VERY protective.
“Hey everyone,” she greeted brightly. “How’s everyone today?” She asked while setting down a tray of eight glasses and two pitchers of water on the table.
“Wonderful, baby, so excited to have you.”
She nearly knocked the glasses over (fortunately, since they were water glasses, they were only plastic). She made eye contact with him and felt her heart completely stop for a few beats. Kael smiled wickedly in return.
Fuck.
She kept her smile in place. “What can I get you to drink?” She asked. After eight years, she already knew what he wanted so she focused on his teammates.
“We were hoping to see The Chargers tonight,” Kael told her. “Do they come here often?”
She didn’t respond. “We have a few specials tonight, so if you have any questions, please let me know,” then she sauntered away to place the drink order.
“Already know what I want, baby?” He called. “That’s so sweet!”
She ignored him. Taking deep breaths she headed to the kitchen. Louis wasn’t in yet. Harry didn’t know she was working. Which meant the rest of the team thought she wasn’t working too. Marc and Michael probably had their suspicions that she was with Harry. So, no one knew she was there. Not really.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
It was probably just going to be an hour. He had his team with him. It wasn’t like they could have a private conversation in the middle of a restaurant. Yeah, he would probably tease and torture her for the better part of that hour, but she could be civil. She could pretend. She had for ages. He didn’t know she was working for The Chargers—she was sure he had an idea that she might be. But the afternoon set it in stone.
He was such a dick. It was the first time she had seen him face to face since she moved out. Everything about him made her skin crawl and she hated it. Every touch and kiss between them seemed tainted now. All those good memories, dates, hockey games, everything felt ruined. Each interaction was colored now with the hindsight that he didn’t love her. Not the way she did. Not the way she expected him to love her for ever and ever. It wasn’t fair. She didn’t deserve that. She knew she didn’t deserve that.
So why did he make her feel undeserving of it ever again?
*
Kael and his teammates came and went fortunately. Just as she predicted. Only a little over an hour. She refrained from speaking directly to Kael and focused on the group as a whole.
When Kael left, she was well past the feeling of relief. There should have been a stronger word for how liberated she felt. She used the bathroom, splashed cold water on her face, and took a moment to process everything. It was just like Kael to come in and make her feel like shit without even trying. Louis was supposed to be in, so at least she had that going for her.
“Hey love,” Louis called. “Everything good?” She probably looked a little shaken, so she wasn’t surprised he asked. She felt shaken.
“Good,” she smiled assuredly. She flitted around the room, ducked behind the bar, and went about her day. It was a busy night, and she wasn’t going to let Kael sour her shift that he had next to nothing to do with. So she didn’t. The next hour ticked on quickly and she was feeling more herself as the time stretched between Kael’s departure and the present.
“Hi baby,” he cooed.
Her arms felt numb almost instantly, she was lucky she didn’t drop her tray. Her fight or flight swept her and just made her freeze. She turned as she had earlier in the day and looked at him. “Hi,” she said curtly. He was alone, which made her nervous.
“I figured you must get a break soon. I’d like to talk.”
“Not for a while. And it’s busy,” at least that wasn’t a lie. “So I might not take one tonight.”
Louis was hurrying about from kitchen to back room, to front of house. It was busy as it could be, but she wanted to keep an eye on him. If Kael got her alone, she wasn’t sure she would be able to control her emotions as well as if she had someone that knew she was not in a situation she wanted to be in just by looking at her. Louis wasn’t Harry, but he would know all the same that she was uncomfortable.
Kael smiled brightly.
Well, at least someone that cared ifshe was uncomfortable.
“I’ll wait,” he offered.
“Great,” she deadpanned.
She went to the back room and wished that there was a group of Chargers there. If she called any of them, she knew they would break curfew and be there for her in a heartbeat. The thought of Kael anywhere near her would make Callie incensed for ruining her day. Niall would be protective in his own way and focused on her. Asher and Lang would get her away from The Locker Room and make sure Kael never set foot there again.
She could hardly imagine what Harry would do to him.
But she lied. She told Harry that she wasn’t working. The routines the boys had had in place prior to her arrival with the team had been disrupted more than she ever anticipated. It was nice they cared but it wasn’t fair to them to upheave their lives for her. She was just the photographer for the team. Their coach’s niece. They didn’t ask to have someone they needed to babysit.
She was an independent, self-sufficient person.
“You okay, love?” Louis asked.
She nodded and flitted around the room taking order and tried not to think about the feeling of Kael’s stare on the back of her head.
*
It was perhaps another hour, and Kael was true to his word in staying put. Fortunately, The Locker Room remained steadily busy. She didn’t have to lie about not taking her break. She foisted him off on another waiter who grew a little tired of him asking for her each time he went over. “Baby,” he snatched her hand as she went by.
She pulled away. “Kael, I’m busy,” she marched away before he could reach for her again.
Without warning a multitude of memories where he snagged her hand over the years filtered through her mind. His grip tight on her arm or hand. Never in a way that any outsider would notice. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” she whispered to herself. She was going to call Harry. His wrath would be well worth it. At least Kael was scared of Harry and the team. Especially if he was outnumbered. She was shaking a little as she headed for the kitchen hoping to catch Louis at least.
“Hey,” Kael said grabbing her again as she passed too close to his table. This time he caught a real hold of her arm and pinned it to the table. To any other onlooker it would look like he was just keeping her in place holding onto her hand in almost a romantic kind of way. No one would see how his fingers dug into her skin, how she was feeling the ache of the hard wood against her knuckles and wrist bone like she just lost an arm-wrestling contest. “I just want to talk.”
She wanted nothing less. “Hey, Louis!” She called quickly and loudly enough so that he would be able to hear her over the din of the whole place regardless of where he had gone off too.
Within seconds Louis was there from the back room.
Harry was right beside him. His eyes narrowed at the sight of her arm on the table. Her mouth popped open in shock. She had no clue he was there. Most obviously, she didn’t want him to see this. “Oh fuck,” she whispered and tried to pry her hand away from Kael’s. She squirmed slightly as he refused to release her. He cupped his other hand gently on top of her arm trying to get her to stop.
Harry wasn’t supposed to be here. He was only supposed to come to her rescue because she couldn’t figure out what else she was to do. She was going to hide in the kitchen and wait.
Harry wasn’t supposed to be around Kael.
“Styles,” Kael practically sang. He didn’t release her arm. “Didn’t know you were here. Tough loss today. I hope it’s the same tomorrow, to be honest.”
He didn’t take the bait. His nostrils flared. “Let go of her hand Crowe,” Harry snarled stepping closer to him.
“We were just talking, right baby?” Kael smiled and took his free hand to cup the side of her face. She turned her face away and brushed it away from her skin.
Harry continued to approach him—up close and personal. If they were on the ice the cages of their helmets would have been touching. “Let her go, right fucking now,” his shoulders were heaving.
“It’s fine,” she croaked. Harry didn’t even acknowledge her.
Was he trying to keep it together? Not make a scene, maybe? Harry was quick to anger—like most hockey players. He probably would have torn Kael limb from limb by now if this wasn’t a local place where fans and the rest of the team went.
“Let go of her,” her he repeated, his voice was so deep. His body shaking.
“Harry, I’m fine—”
He ignored her still and Kael continued keeping her in place despite her squirming. She wanted to whimper as he squeezed her tighter and pressed her hand harder into the table. To the untrained eye, you wouldn’t know. But Harry was watching like this was his favorite movie and they were at the climax of the plot. He saw the way she winced and her body bend slightly as he pressed harder. “Mind your fucking business, Styles,” Kael shook his head. “This doesn’t involve—”
“She is m’business. Especially when you’re fucking hurting her,” the whole bar area went silent as they realized one of their favorite celebrities was about to punch the lights out of one of the best names in hockey. “If y’don’t let her go, m’gonna rip your hand off, Crowe. And m’gonna enjoy it,” he promised shaking his head. “Let go of her.”
She wanted to move more but was utterly terrified. Harry could get in serious trouble. Kael wasn’t particularly dangerous, but his grip was making her whole arm ache. Harry’s threat made her stomach swoop; he was so ready to protect her. Of course that was nice, but she wanted to cry. Hurting one of the top professionals in the league (even if Harry was also at the top) was a great way to get a hefty suspension and fine if he was caught.
Just another way she was going to upend his perfectly normal, happy life.
“Harry, stop,” she begged.
“Yeah, Harry, stop,” Kael mimicked. But she inhaled sharply, pulling and moving again uselessly to try and get away from the grip he had on her wrist. She whimpered despite herself as the pain continued. “Mind your business Harry,” he snarled. “M’talking to my girlfriend.”
Harry didn’t acknowledge the comment. “Stop fucking touching her, Crowe.”
“She’s mine. I’ll do whatever I want to her.”
Harry stared at him, his gaze flicking to her wrist still pinned to the table. She was still squirming, looking to get away. Louis reached for her and Harry put his hand on his chest and pushed him away. He walked to the bar, grabbed a shot of whatever the bartender was pouring. His head tipped back as he sucked the liquid down. The quiet clink of his glass hitting the bar was the only sound in the room. Silently, Harry plucked the rings he wore when he wasn’t playing hockey off his fingers. He tucked them into the inside pocket of his jacket. It felt like the seconds were ticking by in slow motion. Not even the pain from Kael’s tight grip on her hand was enough to draw her attention away from Harry’s movements.
She swallowed, her eyes pleading with Harry not to do it. It wasn’t that bad. She could take it. The pain she was feeling now was hardly anything in comparison to what he could do. This was nothing.
“One more time, Crowe... Let go. Of her,” Harry’s voice was even. Measured. It had the tone of I’m not asking again.
“She’s mine, Styles. Find someone else to stalk.”
Harry smirked, shook his head, and his eyes flickered to hers for only a second. Then they were back on Kael. “Oh. No. No she’s very much not yours.”
As slow as the seconds had ticked by, they all came rushing back at full speed; maybe time even sped up. Harry delivered a lightning-fast punch to Kael’s nose causing him to gasp and drop her hand as he instinctively reached for his face. With the toe of his boot, Harry tipped his chair before Kael could get his bearings, and he fell flat to his back. The chair broke into pieces with his weight. He gasped, trying to right himself and protect his nose from bleeding everywhere. Harry reached down before Kael could get a grip. He yanked him up by the collar and front of his shirt. A stupid, ugly orange and blue sweatshirt that Harry was delighted to wrinkle hard in his hands. Before Kael was barely on his feet, Harry hauled him backward. Shoved him hard into the bar so the edge dug into his spine, no doubt. Without pause, Harry delivered a solid punch to his cheek, a heel stomp to his foot, and knee to his stomach.
Kael bent forward, gasping for air and Harry’s breathing was as even as if he was sleeping.
Her hand went to her mouth and the other to her stomach as she tried to hold herself together. Everyone looked in pure shock. Surely someone was supposed to try and stop Harry. Even if he was a hockey player for the town that everyone loved. But given he incapacitated Kael in a matter of thirty seconds it wasn’t like anyone wanted to try and stop him. Even Louis was speechless and looked in horror. “Are y’gonna touch her again?” He didn’t say anything, which was the wrong answer as Harry twisted him in an instant, pressing his face down into the bar, pulling his arm back behind his body. “I said, are y’gonna touch her again?”
“No,” he rasped.
“M’letting y’keep your hand. Don’t make me regret it,” he snapped and shoved him a final time into the bar. He dropped a few hundreds on the bar for the damage and his drink. “Louis, keep the change,” he muttered over his shoulder without sparing another glance at Kael. “S’time t’go, Bunny,” he murmured lowly for no one else to hear but her. He placed an arm around her waist, and tugged her toward the exit. Every pair of eyes followed them.
“B-but m-my shift—”
Without missing a beat, he grabbed his wallet from his back pocket and stuffed it in the front pocket of her apron. “Let’s go,” he repeated and ushered her outside.
Harry opened his passenger door and gestured for her to get in.
She looked nervous, which made Harry uneasy. This strong, brave woman who bantered with unruly hockey players and dealt with fans and drunk patrons looked a bit lost. “What about my car— I mean... your other—”
“Get in the car, Rookie,” he ordered.
She followed his direction. Harry waited until she was safely buckled inside before closing her in. He locked the door for the short walk around his car, only unlocking it so he could slip inside. Once seated and buckled, he turned the car on and immediately exited the parking lot. After driving in silence for several moments Harry dropped his hand on her thigh like it was an instinct.
He didn’t ask if she was okay. Which was kind of him, because how could she be? Her heart was thudding in her chest, her wrist hurt, and her brain was a mess. Harry’s hand on her leg should have made her uncomfortable given he didn’t ask. But it was almost too comforting, and she dreaded the idea that he would have to let go of her eventually.
“Don’t y’dare cry over him, bunny,” his voice was tight.
She sniffled, not realizing she was, in fact, crying. She swiped her hands across her cheeks. “Sorry,” she whispered looking toward the window.
Harry shook his head and sighed. His hand squeezed her leg while he pressed his head back into the seat hard—if the head rest wasn’t there and he didn’t have to watch the road, she was certain his eyes would be facing the ceiling of his car, searching for strength somewhere above him. His jawline seemed sharper than ever as he clenched his teeth. “Y’don’t have t’apologize.”
“Thank you,” she croaked quietly. “For doing that, I...” she swallowed hard. “I don’t really know what I would have done,” she admitted. The scenario didn’t seem to play out in full if Harry wasn’t there. Yeah, Louis would have helped, but this was different. Harry didn’t say anything. She pulled his wallet out of her apron and placed it in one of the cup holders between them. “I don’t want—”
“It’s yours.”
“Harry, it’s not that—”
“Bunny, I haven’t stopped thinking ‘bout you all afternoon. Since I met you, really. I can’t stop. I used t’think ‘bout nothing but hockey. But s’like you’re the only thing on m’mind now. M’happy when I see you around the rink taking pictures. M’happy when y’try t’skate on m’pond. I love our lessons, and I want t’have y’in my house all the time. M’happy when you’re around. Happier than I’ve been in years, and I didn’t even know I wasn’t completely happy. I can’t have one-night stands anymore. I tried, I did. You’re a long shot. I know that. Someone who deserves a guy so much better than a hot-tempered hockey player as evident by the piece of shit that hurt you in so many ways,” His voice is quiet. “S’not a secret I like you. A lot. If we can only be friends and roommates—because m’sure as hell not bringing y’back to that sorry excuse of an apartment—then s'what I’ll do.”
There was only a brief beat of silence while she contemplated all he said. “I worked really hard on my apartment,” she whispered.
This seemed to soften him a little. He sighed. “It’s adorable, Bunny. It is. But m’constantly worried you’re going t’be kidnapped, robbed, or worse. You can move in this week,” he insisted. “I have the day off after tomorrow and I was going t’spend it at the gym t’lift with the guys so we can pack and move your shit all the same instead.”
“Harry, I don’t think that will work... I have to pay out the rest of my lease if I move out early.”
“That’s bullshit,” he scoffed. She didn’t say anything. Because she kind of agreed that it was bullshit. But she couldn’t move in with Harry. Not when he just admitted he liked her the way she did. It set her heart into a dramatic flutter. Being legally bound would hopefully be enough of a reason for Harry to agree to let her stay until her lease ran out. Then she could figure out her next steps. “Fine,” he decided after a moment. “The black debit card in m’wallet will take care of it.”
She snorted unable to hide her shock. “Harry, you can’t—”
“M’done arguing with you ‘bout this, Bunny.” She frowned and looked at her hand, turning her wrist and wincing ever so slightly. “Is your wrist okay?” He asked.
She shrugged and answered instinctively. “It hurts; but I’ve had worse,” she gasped at her own mistake almost instantly. “Oh fuck, I mean—” she stopped speaking. It didn’t matter. It was too late. Harry saw through it and understood exactly what she meant. He clenched the steering wheel tighter and he swallowed. The bob in his throat looked like he was drinking a glass of nails.
“Did he ever hurt you like this before?” Harry’s voice was an octave lower than she ever heard it. His eyes narrowed as he stared forward.
She didn’t want to make matters any worse, so she didn’t speak. Didn’t move. For several seconds, the car seemed so silent it was as if the tires weren’t even on the ground anymore or if she was breathing.
“Harry,” she whispered eventually.
Harry took a deep breath not liking the tone of her voice and pulled off to the side of the road.
“What are we— Harry!”
Before she could understand what was happening, Harry was outside and opening his trunk and the car doors locked her inside. Instantly, he pulled out one of the back-up sticks he had in case his two in the locker room broke in the middle of a game (or if he wanted to practice while he was home on the pond out back). He slammed it hard on the pavement multiple times grunting as he did until the stick snapped. Then he grabbed a second and repeated this process again, swearing and cursing like he was imagining Kael was under the stick.
Once satisfied with his destruction, he collected the broken pieces and dropped them in the back before sitting in the driver’s seat again, his breathing only slightly elevated.
She stared at him wildly. Her eyes were wide and beautiful. “If he touches you again, m’killing him,” he said simply. It was a promise. His breath was heavy from the exertion.
She nodded; Harry put the car in drive and continued back toward his place. His hand went right back on her thigh, which she still found comforting and warm, even though she had only had the luxury of his hand on her for no more than a few minutes. “Okay,” she whispered hoping there wouldn’t be an again to speak of.
Harry let the silence linger again. “My apartment is the other way,” she reminded him.
He rolled his eyes. “I just told you, Rookie, y’not living there anymore.”
“Oh my God, Harry. You can’t be serious.”
He snorted. “No. I am. As a heart attack.”
“Harry I can’t move in—”
“Of course, y’can. I have like five bedrooms. Pick one. Pick three for all I care.”
She swallowed. “What if I pick your bedroom?” She was attempting to lighten the mood, maybe. Harry wasn’t sure. Or maybe she was trying (and failing) to be annoying. But Harry was never annoyed by her. He was amused at worst. She was adorable. Every little thing she did was adorable.
“Then it’s yours,” he shrugged. He was hardly home during the season anyway. With his niece, Mum, and Gem out of town, he wasn’t home much in the off-season either. He could easily move into another room if she wanted his. In fact, he probably would give her his room. It wasn’t the only one with a bathroom, but it had a nice tub that he knew was being wasted without proper use and it felt like she deserved a relaxing night to soak in the tub until she got pruney and everything else that stressed her in her life disappeared.
“I thought you didn’t bring women home to stay,” she reminded him.
“Never had one that I wanted t’bring home,” he shrugged.
She pressed her head to the window. He was quick. Didn’t miss a beat. “I’ll stay tonight, but I’m not moving in. My uncle is going to kill you.”
He shrugged. “S’a long line of Glacier Wolves who’ll want t’kill me before him.” She giggled softly under her breath. Harry glanced at her peripherally and smirked at the little smile that graced her lips. “M’niece is over a lot in the off season,” he told her. “Gem and Mum come by too. So s’had women there before.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Then, yeah. Never had a woman I wanted to bring home,” he repeated. Harry parked in his driveway, turned to her, his hand still on her thigh and honestly, she never wanted it to move.
“Are we still friends?” She blurted. He just admitted he liked her. It was no secret she liked him too. It could make things very awkward going forward so she wouldn’t blame him if he really didn’t want to be friends any longer.
“What a weird fucking question, Rookie,” he shook his head.
“Can you just tell me?”
“Yes, we’re still fucking friends. Despite the fact I would love t’be more.”
She closed her eyes. “He really fucked me up, Harry,” she whispered. “He... he wanted some trophy girlfriend that doted on him and worshipped him for being a good hockey player. He didn’t want me to be my own person. He didn’t want me to have my own hobbies or interests. Like I was nothing, a nobody—”
“Rookie,” he whispered.
“—and I just let him treat me that way. Because it was easier than confronting it—”
“Rookie.”
“—So I don’t want to keep falling for you because you... you’re so talented and you will overshadow me and you should. But it’s so fucking cold living in the shadow of someone else and I don’t think I can do it anymore.”
He winced. “Bunny,” he wanted her to stop.
“I don’t love that nickname either,” she sighed. “I want to. It’s cute and it’s even cuter when you say it. But the connotation of being a puck bunny is just more of what Kael insinuated and I don’t—”
“I don’t think you are a puck bunny. S’not why I call you that. Y’wrinkle your nose like a bunny when y’concentrate. S’the first thing I noticed when I met y’taking pictures rink-side. And you’re always going and going like the little Energizer bunny. But mostly, s’because you’re so fucking cute like a bunny. S’honestly nearly nauseating sometimes.”
Her heart skipped a beat. She swallowed trying to keep all the feelings of falling for another hockey player at bay. “So, I make you sick?”
He smiled. “Excessively.”
“And you want me anyway?”
“Excessively,” he whispered cupping her face. She leaned into the touch, closed her eyes, and sank into the way his hand caressed her cheek for a moment.
Sighing, she opened her eyes and looked at him shyly. “You probably know that he cheated on me,” she reminded him. “And the worst of it, I don’t know if it was the first time, and I don’t want to know. Because I already felt stupid for letting him belittle me and letting me forget parts of myself.”
Harry tilted his head back fully staring at the ceiling for a moment. “Yeah...” And now Harry knew this wasn’t the first time he had hurt her either. Whether it was intentional or not.
“And...” she swallowed. “I don’t think you’re like him... if you take anything away from this conversation, please know that I think you’re nothing like him. You’re up front about most of everything. He kept things from me. But... you’re you and you could have any woman you want in any city you want. I don’t fault you for that—I really hope you know that... but I don’t want to be a number anymore, Harry. I don’t want to feel like an idiot, and I don’t think you would intentionally make me feel like an idiot but—”
“Bunny,” he interrupted, turning back to gaze into her eyes so intensely it felt like everything around them disappeared except for the space between them. The seriousness in his green eyes made her stomach flip. They seemed darker. Like the color was changing to a darker shade to explain how serious he was and how he meant every word that spilled from his mouth. “I think you’re brilliant,” he whispered. “In every facet of your life. I’ve thought about nothing but hockey m’whole life. It has been eat, sleep, and breathe ice, pucks, and sticks. The second I met you, every thought has been ‘bout you,” he reminded her. “If I never played another game of hockey, I really think I would be okay s’long as y’were around.”
Her heart felt like it was broken and whole all at the same time. It was too sweet. She bit the inside of her lip. “Well, I don’t want that,” she whispered. “You’re quite good,” she reminded him.
He chuckled. “The point remains, Rookie... I want you t’have everything y’could possibly want. I want t’do anything I can t’help y’achieve anything y’want t’do.”
She looked at her lap. “I can’t believe you went to get a drink.”
“I really didn’t think y’would be there... was hoping I’d run into Louis and maybe he would know if y’were okay. Y’never answered my texts. Didn’t tell me y’made it home.” he frowned. “Why did y’lie t’me, Bunny?”
She took a deep breath. “The whole team has been so nice to me,” she whispered. “I’m not really used to that...” she trailed off. “Callie got so many penalties, you had to interrupt your post-game cool down to walk me to your car, everyone wants to take shifts to watch me... you have to drive me home, give me one of your car... I’ve seriously disrupted your lives... and it was all just too much today. I don’t want to bother you guys. You didn’t sign up to have a kid or a pet you need to watch. Uncle Charlie didn’t have to give me a job with a hockey team. I feel like I didn’t earn anything. It’s so sweet that all of you care, but it’s weird for me...”
God, she was cute. Even sad she was cute. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. “Y’haven’t disrupted our lives,” he promised. “We’d do this for anyone.”
“That’s comforting I suppose.”
“C’mon, s’late... we have a game tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Harry,” she whispered.
“Course, Rookie,” he squeezed her leg one more time and then got out of the car. (As she predicted, she hated the feeling of Harry’s hand anywhere else but her thigh.)
Entering his house, Harry kicked off his shoes and headed down the hall toward the bedrooms. She texted her group chat with Michael and Marc as she flopped onto the couch until she got more direction from Harry.
I’m at someone’s house for the night so don’t worry about me.
Michael reacted to her message with a thumbs up.
It better be a HOT hockey player.
Michael reacted to Marc’s message with a thumbs down.
Good night, Marc!
I want every INCH of detail
That earned a vomiting emoji from Michael. I do NOT want any details.
GOOD NIGHT MARC
*
Harry hated that he had a big house. If they were at her apartment, they could have been squished in her bed right then. She wouldn’t be down the hall and half of Harry’s mattress wouldn’t have felt so cold. He rubbed his eyes and sighed. Fortunately, his phone vibrated almost immediately. Like she somehow knew he was awake.
Are you awake?
M-hmm
Can we get breakfast, please?
Harry would throw himself down a set of stairs for her if she asked. “You could jus’ come in here t’ask,” he called.
“I’m creating boundaries!” She answered from a guest room. “Besides this bed is comfy and I don’t want to get up,” she giggled.
“Well, I don’t want boundaries,” he grumbled to himself. He wondered if she slept without pants on. Not that it mattered. He was turned on by the thought of her naked in his bed or if she was in a full snow suit.
“What did you say?” She called.
“Nothing,” he grumbled and pressed the palm of his hand over the front of his shorts willing the blood to rush anywhere but his dick at the thought of her in a goddamn snow suit. “I just have t’shower,” he mumbled.
“Okay, I’ll be here,” she sighed, and Harry could picture her snuggling herself further into the mattress. Maybe it was for the best she was in another room. If she was there looking all cute and cuddly on his bed, he would have to quit hockey. He would probably spend the rest of his life worshipping her on his mattress in every possible way.
Plus, his dick would never be anything but hard.
“Jesus, fuck,” he sighed to himself under the spray of the warm shower. He tried to think about anything but her pretty self in the other room. In his house. In his bed. In his clothes. She was probably changing into her uniform from the night before, so at least he wouldn’t see her in the shirt and shorts he gave her to wear for bed.
He shook his head and focused on shower and not what it would feel like to press her against the tile or—
“Fuuuuck,” he touched his forehead against the tile. Hockey. Defense. Goals. Niall. That’s good. Niall, gross. Callie—FUCK Callie. Asher owes me ten dollars for betting Lang wouldn’t say “good effort” in their pool game the other day.
His shower took twice as long to shower because he had to actively think about something other than his pretty friend. Once he was out, he slipped into a pair of sweats and one of his long sleeve practice shirts. As he put on his deodorant, he realized it took him an embarrassing amount of time to realize what she was doing as he got dressed. “Rookie, you are not,” he called as he hurried down the hall.
“Not what?” She asked innocently.
“Doing my dish—Rookie, what the hell!”
“They were just there! And I was bored, Harry. Plus, you didn’t say I couldn’t!”
“I told you last time.”
“Well yeah, but that was last time.”
“Please stop,” he begged and rubbed a hand over his face. “We’re supposed t’be going t’breakfast.”
“Well, I figured while you took two years to get ready,” it couldn’t have been more than twenty minutes max but maybe his effort to not think about her in his shower took longer than he thought, “I would make myself useful,” she shrugged and set the final dish on the drying rack beside his sink. She turned the water off and ran the dishtowel over the counter and edge surrounding the sink. She turned, leaning against the counter. Her black and silver uniform top for The Locker Room was on her again. Her leggings from the night before clung to her legs like a second skin.
He wondered how she could look so cute after working a hectic, busy shift, then slept all night and it barely looked like she had a hair out of place. “What?” She asked looking down at her shirt. “Do I have something on this? We’ll have to stop at my apartment first if I do. I’m not going out with you to breakfast when you look hot and I look like trash,” she frowned.
He snorted. “Y’don’t look like trash, Rookie.”
“Well, do I smell or something?”
“No,” he shook his head and rolled his eyes. “You’re beautiful. Stunning really,” he shrugged one shoulder and reached out to touch her face. He skimmed his thumb along her cheek wishing he could lean in and kiss her until they were both breathless. He smiled softly enjoying the way her cheek warmed under his touch. For someone so snarky, she was awfully shy. “Let’s go,” he tilted his head toward the main hallway. He made his way before she could read into it as he was sure she was wont to do.
Harry opened her passenger door and smiled wickedly at her as she got in. “What?” She asked, her eyebrows pinching together.
“You think I’m hot,” he sang.
“Shut the fuck up.”
Harry chuckled, closing her inside.
*
Kael didn’t play because he was injured. The report sustained it happened at practice the day before but everyone on The Chargers bench knew. Kael kept his gear on but moved to the end of the bench for the starters and lines of his teammates that would be playing. He hardly cheered, hardly moved.
The rest of The Wolves sent death glares to everyone on the team. Harry was checked into the boards more times than he could count. But every time he caught sight of the pretty photographer twirling her wrist in between photos, he felt grateful for each hit. She continued to take pictures, placing her camera into the cutouts of the glass around the ice.
Kael hid from pictures from his own media specialist, the news outlets, and even the fans during the game and in between periods.
“Coward,” Asher growled as they left the ice and headed to the locker room at the end of the game. The group that typically resided in the back of The Locker Room was livid when they found out from Harry that Kael hurt her. They too must have seen the way she twisted her wrist around between pictures. Harry wondered if she noticed she was doing it. It ate at him that it wasn’t the first time that piece of garbage hurt her. There was nothing Harry could do—well, maybe if he ever did figure out time travel, he could. But for now, he could take the hits from Kael’s stupid team and make sure the pretty photographer was okay.
Besides.
He may have had a tough game physically, but Harry was truly on cloud nine.
“Sweetheart, you good?” Lang called from the front of the line heading back toward the locker room.
“I’m good!” She answered.
Harry didn’t even care that Niall was walking alongside her and not him. Or that Callie gave her arm a squeeze when he walked by. It didn’t bother him that Asher was as irate as him either.
Because the word Styles was on her body. It was purposeful. If Kael paid attention, he would see it. He would know she supported Harry, regardless of how outlandish it was (or wasn’t) that he defended her last night. Harry knew the second he saw it, that Kael was going to look at the pretty girl with his number on her and start fuming in his seat. Maybe that’s why his team aimed for him so vehemently throughout the game as well.
Whatever, Harry could take it.
It was well worth it to see his name on her jersey.
Harry realized it was his time to shine after they went out for breakfast. He drove her to get her car at Louis’. He followed her home to the shady apartment building. He wasn’t in the mindset to leave her for any bit of time given the night before. Maybe not for a good few days either if he had it his way. They had away games coming up so they would be all but trapped together on a plane, a bus, and in a hotel so that was in his favor.
He really hoped she would be in a nearby room at the hotel. Or better yet, there wouldn’t be enough rooms, and he could share his with her.
“Why’d you choose eleven?” She asked when she came out of her room after getting ready. She was fluffing her pretty hair and tugging at the hem of the jersey that she had put on. It took a moment to register in Harry’s mind that she was talking to him and was anticipating a response. In her mind, it was no big deal that she was nonchalantly wearing his name and number. That she was by far the prettiest thing he had ever seen. The sweetest person he knew.
He swore his heart skipped a beat as his vision refocused on the lovely girl wearing his name on her back.
He cleared his throat. “S’the first number I ever got,” he shrugged. “But now I say m’so good, m’number twice.”
She grinned and laughed quietly under her breath as she put earrings on with The Chargers logo. “I like that. You are very good. I’ve seen a lot of hockey myself. I like to think I’m a good judge of ability.”
When Harry was younger, he thought if he could have a superpower, he would want to time travel. As he got older it changed a bit, he wanted super strength so he could be the strongest hockey player. Read minds so he could predict the movements of opponents on the ice. Since he met her, he returned to the tried and true: if he could time travel, he could figure out twenty seconds after he kissed her if she hated him or kiss him back, he would have done it right then.
He smirked. “So m’the lucky one today?” He asked pulling on the sleeve.
“I don’t know, does wearing someone’s jerseys constitute as lucky for the day?”
He nodded. “Yeah, very much so, Rookie.”
“Then sure; you’re very lucky, Harry,” she rolled her eyes.
Harry had to bite the inside of his lip to keep his smile from splitting his face in half. He turned away slightly and caught sight of a string of pictures on her little kitchen bar. “What’s all this?” He asked, picking up a photo and inspecting it. It was one of the ones she took while Harry was practicing before the rest of the team showed up. Another photo she got laying down on the ice of Callie’s skates when Harry wanted to rip his teammate’s arm off for holding her so close that day. One from Niall’s empty net. Another of Asher’s locker, his jersey on display. A close up of the C on Lang’s jersey. One of just the empty rink—no fans, no players, nothing.
“Oh... I don’t know,” she looked away shyly piling them together. “I was playing with the idea of making a series of photos,” she flipped one over to indicate the back showed the number three in the line. “You guys are attractive and stuff, but I thought there was a lot of beauty in the little things behind the bench, you know? It’s not just fights and points. The rink is so pretty,” she shrugged.
Harry grabbed her hand before she could stack any more of them away. He looked at each of the pictures painstakingly selected from the hundreds of photos she took each day. The way the light shone off a helmet, the way a shadow fell on the bench. “They’re beautiful, Bunny. Why don’t y’do it?”
“Do what?”
“Make it a series?”
She shook her head. “No... I don’t know. Not many people care about sports photography,” she shrugged. “Not like this anyway.”
“Rookie, I think every team owner and manager in the league would pay t’have this set in their arena.”
“No way, there’s not a single headshot of a star player. In sports, the only thing that really sells by far is you guys and your pretty faces,” she patted his cheek. “It’s tragic, I have some incredible photos of a few baseball diamonds at sunset. But there’s no fans and no players so it just wouldn’t sell well.”
“Show me,” he urged.
She sighed and put her jacket over “We’re going to be late, Harry. Uncle Charlie is already going to be annoyed with me that I’m wearing your jersey. And so will the rest of the team.”
“They all had their turn, Rookie, y’made me wait forever,” he grumbled. They didn’t have to be annoyed. They didn’t have a crush on her the way Harry did. They all knew that. His teammates were his family, but they made him cranky no less; teasing him about how smitten he was about their photographer.
She smiled sadly. “Harry,” she sighed. “I’ll show you another time.”
“Promise?” He pleaded.
“Promise?” She repeated in disbelief. Harry was nearly thirty years old and sounded like he was in kindergarten.
“Promise you’ll show me,” he said pointedly.
“Alright, yeah," She shook her head, sighed with a smile still on her lips. "I promise.”
--
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#KALE SALAD makes me laugh so much!#OR CALLIE'S SAME#i think men being protective is the hottest thing in the world 😍#even if it's not their s.o.#like you want to protect me? thank you. you own all of my free will now 🫠#i feel like I write terrible 'fights' i'm glad this went over well. i love hockey fights (any sport fights really; see protective men again#i think harry being possessive is my toxic trait. i love him so much#i wish I was his business myself#EXECUTION#FERAL#i realized I never mentioned the rings once but i wrote this part before most of the other parts so here we are#what's a plot hole in fan fic#i am 🥵 about harry taking charge. any man taking charge in a situation like that#i love vulnerability after an intense adrenaline filled moment#yeah only recently found out hockey sticks are $$$$ like how are you going to break two of them!?#she is really iconic. i love her so much tbh#he's so silly#i thought the full snow suit was funny 🤭#the dishes are all you Monica 💕#extra you say 👀🤭#thanks for the book club meeting 💕
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my fault: lando | ln4 smau
♡ summary: you star in my fault: london and the internet can’t stop comparing your onscreen love interest to your real life boyfriend, lando norris
♡ pairing: lando norris x singer/actress!reader
♡ warnings: use of yn, fluff, established relationship
♡ faceclaim: asha banks
♡ a/n: i watched my fault london and couldn’t stop thinking about how fun a smau with asha as the faceclaim would be 😭
masterlist
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

𝜗𝜚
yourusername
🎵 YN LN • Feel The Rush

Liked by lando and 635,789 others
yourusername My Fault: London is OUT!!!! AGHHH 😭🥲 i’m so proud of this movie and everyone who worked on it!! plus my song Feel The Rush is in the end credits (WTF 🥹🥹🥹) so go WATCH GUYS!!! and if that’s not enough to convince you there’s a mclaren cameo 😏
tagged: primevideo, primevideouk
View all comments
user854 “mclaren cameo” got me thinking lando just gonna pop up 😪
user206 but no queen meant an actual mclaren 🥲🥲
user173 ACTUALLY PEAK WATTPAD CINEMA 😍😍
user035 wattpad cinema is crazy 😭
pietra.pilao talented girl 🥰
yourusername love you p 😚🙃
mattbroome3 vroom vroom 🏎️ ♥︎ by author
user840 ABSOLUTELY OBSESSED
lando MY BEAUTIFUL TALENTED PRETTY TOTAL BABE OF A GIRLFRIEND EVERYONE 😍😩😝
maxfewtrell damn mate could you be anymore whipped
yourusername shush you muppet (don’t stop keep complimenting me) 🤭😝
yourusername maxfewtrell literally stfu who invited you 😒
user387 FAVORITE WAG EVER (she ate in this guys go watch it 🥹🥹🥹)
user218 guys hear me out nick is eerily lando coded….
user876 STOP CAUSE I THOUGHT THE SAME THING 😭😭
user321 THEY LOOK ALIKE FFS 💀
lilymhe best movie every pretty girl 🫶🏻
yourusername MWAH LOVE YOU BIG 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
lilyzneimer i’ve watched this way too many times i fear 🫣😭
yourusername BYEEEE ILYY
user530 the sequel is a NEEED 😭
primevideo buckle up
user408 she’s actually so pretty 😭😪
user032 when she can’t escape guys who drive mclarens >> ♥︎ by author
user321 ICONIC TBH
hattiepiastri can lando fight?
riabish no 🙂↔️
yourusername no (but he’d try) ☺️
maxfewtrell no he can’t
lando literally wtf 😀
hattiepiastri movie eats and so do you!!!
yourusername MWAH MWAH MWAH 😚😚😚
—— twitter

replies—
user912 ITS SOOO GOOD (BUT THE MCLAREN)
user773 THE FUCKING MCLAREN & THE LICENSE PLATE 😭😭😭
user912 LIKE THEY DID THAT ON PURPOSE 💀 ♥︎ by author
user775 YN LOOKED SO GOOOOD 😭
user773 HONESTLYYYYYYY
user925 THE NL LICENSE PLATE MADE ME CRASH OUT
user021 IT WAS CRAZY BEHAVIOR
user044 the actor even lowkey looks like lando 😭😭
user773 no cause they have some similarities it’s kinda scary 😭😭
user923 yn’s onscreen version having the same type as her irl is real af though
user773 honestly if you’re gonna kiss someone in a movie might as well be your bf’s lookalike 😭😭
user856 ITS SUCH A GOOD MOVIE I LOOK PAST THE WATTPADYNESS OF IT 😭😭😭
~~~
user550 BYE THATS DIABOLICAL 😭😭😭😭
user773 i hope yn sees these tweets cause this is wild 😭😭
user410 DONT WISH THAT ON ME OMFG-
user887 lando and matt ignoring that they’re kinda twins: 🧑🦯 ♥︎ by author
user444 yn’s too chronically online for you guys to be this bold 😭😭
user410 whoops 🥲
user923 mad respect for coming up with that one
yourusername STOP STFU 😭😭
user410 NO LOOK AWAY MY LOVE IM SOOO SORRY
user773 OH HI QUEEN 😭😭😭
user076 STOP U GUYS SCARRED HER SHE’LL NEVER INTERACT WITH US AGAIN 💀
yourusername GUYS NO DONT MAKE THIS A THING WTF-🥲🥲🥲
user923 ml i fear this is already a thing 😬
user176 LOOK AWAY LOOOK AWAYYYY
—— interview
snippet of YN LN & Matthew Broome youtube interview for My Fault: London

(pic 1: interviewer: now i'd be remissed if i didn't ask... YN how do we feel about fans online saying Nick and Lando have similarities? Matt: *laughs* YN: I honestly still don't see it! but i showed Lan a few of the tweets i saw and we all have seen many tiktoks—)(pic 2: Matt: i sent her and lando a few on instagram and was like this is f***ing nuts mates and we had a proper laugh about it YN: *laughs* it got worse when lan's siblings started seeing the comparisons and told him "he has your f***ing license plate!" but honestly i think we all just find it a funny coincidence! i mean nick does have a mclaren with a custom license plate *you shrug*)(pic 3: Matt: *laughs* although she's not a fan of me and lando calling each other twin which we have started doing just to mess with her! YN: it actually makes me mental it's the worst! Interviewer: *laughs*)
Comments —
user807 STOPP THEY THINK THE COMPARISONS ARE HILARIOUS
user776 YN is so unserious i love her 😭😭😭
user446 matt and lando calling each other twin is fucking hilarious 😭😭
user007 it honestly makes me so happy 😭😭
user310 okay but the similarities are so glaringly obvious 😭😭
user820 i love that lando has always been close to yn’s costars
user885 its boyfriend goals tbh
user431 such a good movie and the offscreen chemistry is adorable (platonic obvs)
user522 YN CALLING LANDO LAN FUCKS ME UP ISTG 😭😭😭
user032 MUM AND DAD HONESTLY
user001 love that she was probably giggling over the tweets with lando 😭😭😭😭
user045 f1 winter break has us so bored we all watched a movie because the main guy looked a little like lando norris 😭😭
user465 speak for yourself i watched for my fav wag yn‼️
user777 drop the sequel 😩😩😩😩
—— instagram
yourusername
🎵 Charli xcx • Vroom Vroom

Liked by pietra.pilao and 856,708 others
yourusername 1 week of My Fault: London!!! as a treat for streaming enjoy my lando cosplay 😚🙃☺️
tagged: mattbroome3
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user281 giving f1 driver 😍
user021 YN could drive an f1 car but lando couldn’t play Noah 😌😌 ♥︎ by author
mclaren contract is on its way 📝
yourusername mwah admin 🥰 (i will win the wdc for you bby)
lando you can’t give her my job… admin..? zak..? andrea..?
mclaren lando sorry who is lando norris? we only know YN LN 🤷♀️ ♥︎ by author
user630 i have watched it four times (ITS AMAAAZZZZINGGG) ♥︎ by author
lando i’ve watched it 10 get on my level 🤨
user630 lando pack it up nick leister wannabe
yourusername user630 BYE 😭
user388 ICON LEGEND GIVE HER THE WDC ALREADY HONESTLY
lilymhe woaaah racing driver 😍
yourusername 😝😏
alex_albon i- wow
lando you soooooooooooo pretty 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
yourusername omg it’s lando norris 🫢🫢🫢🫢🫢
lando u single????? can i have ur numberrrrrrr 😍😍
yourusername noo i have a bf 😨😨😨
lando yourusername NOOOOO 😓😓😓😓😓😓😓😓😓😓😓
maxfewtrell sometimes you make me question why i’m friends with you 🙂↔️
yourusername maxfewtrell wdym? aren’t you his wag??
user995 SOOOO PRETTYYYY 😍
mattbroome3 quick like norris quick like lando norris 🏎️🏎️
lando hey that’s me 🫢
mattbroome3 lando wait- twin… is that you?
yourusername don’t be slow stegosaurus..? 🏎️
yourusername mattbroome3 stfu 🙂
pietra.pilao missed opportunity to use sports car as the song 😪
yourusername YOURE SO RIGHT 🥲
user886 actually obsessed 😭😪
user930 ICONS
user765 so… anyone else think these two look cute together??
user176 no. that’s just you.
user004 hey so she has this really really cool bf and doesn’t enjoy being shipped with costars! hope this helps! 🙂
user032 go away.
lando some people shouldn’t have the internet.
yourusername NO THEY REALLY DONT 🙂
yourusername lando istg 😭😭
riabish actually best racing driver i’ve ever seen 🤷♀️
yourusername it’s true get me in that mclaren zbrownceo
lando yourusername hey so that’s my boss 🙂
yourusername lando i know 😊
user912 she’s gonna pull the race scene this season and race for lando 😭😭😭 ♥︎ by author
user321 ik this is a joke but pls could you IMAGINE 😭😭😭😭
user995 this photo is actually papaya’s lineup this season
user039 all i see is best driver ever and walmart lando 🏎️🏎️
user995 user039 WALMART LANDO IS CRAZY 😭😭
lando YOURE CRAZY IF YOURE NOT STREAMING THE SHIT OUT OF THIS MOVIE‼️‼️‼️‼️
yourusername guys… i think he might kinda like me 🤭🤭🤭
~~~
lando.jpg
🎵 Tate McRae • 2 Hands

Liked by lnfour and 255,890 others
lando.jpg movie star 🏎️
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user921 HE REMEMBERED THE PASSWORD TO SHOW OFF HIS GIRLFRIEND YASSSSS 😍😍
lnfour our favorite movie star!! ♥︎ by author
pietra.pilao the models hot can i have her number??
lando.jpg no.
yourusername yes 🤭
maxfewtrell yourusername you can’t steal my girlfriend!
user982 he remembered his password ‼️‼️‼️
user765 give her all the awards‼️ ♥︎ by author
primevideo movie star? or supermodel? 😍
yourusername omg 🤭🤭🤭
lando.jpg watch it 😒
quadrant we 🫶 YN
user254 coolest movie star in the world 😍😍
user087 my fault is such a good movie and YN slayyed 🤩
mattbroome3 omg guys twin posted‼️
yourusername STFU 😭😭😭
lando.jpg ITS MY TWIN ☺️☺️
maxfewtrell lando.jpg i thought i was your twin 🥲😕
user470 using 2 hands on a pic of his gf is so real 😭😭
user708 i love him for that tbh
user003 it’s fucking iconic 😭😭
user034 MOM AND DAD FRFR
user007 OBSESSED FAVORITE WAG TALENTED QUEEN 😍😍
user517 models are lucky YN chose acting and singing for a career cause DAMN 😍😍
user021 HONESTLY
lilyzneimer ITS MY FAVORITE RACING DRIVER YN LN 😍😍
yourusername FLATTERED AFFF 🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭
oscarpiastri this just… this just hurts 😕
lando.jpg damn that’s cold 😭😭
lilymhe mm real af mine too 🤭
alex_albon lilymhe OKAY—
yourusername AHH I LOOK GOOD 🤭🤭🤭🤭
lando.jpg YOU ALWAYS LOOK GOOD 😍😍😍😍
yourusername i love youuuuu this is so cutesyyyy 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹
lando.jpg MY FAVORITE PERSON IN THE WORLD TALENTED AMAZING BEAUTIFUL I LOVE YOU TOO 🥹🫶🫶
#f1 fic#f1 fluff#f1 fanfic#f1 smau#f1 imagine#f1 social media au#f1 x reader#f1 x you#lando norris x female reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris fluff#lando norris fic#lando norris one shot#lando norris fanfic#lando norris smau#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 fanfic
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ski trip || ln4
☆ summary: annual ski trip with lando, max and p! ft. down bad bf lando
☆ pairing: lando norris x private!nonfamous!reader
☆ fc & warnings: none and suggestive and minor bad language- you are responsible for the content you consume
☆ requested: nope!
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
ynuser has made a post 🔒

liked by landonorris, ln4, oscarpiastri, maxfewtrell, yourbff and 1,238 others
ynuser: and that’s a wrap on the 2024 season! congrats again to the mclaren team and my little gremlin boy 🧡
view all 56 comments
landonorris: AWOOOGGAAAAA
ynuser: 😘🤍🫶🏻😔👏🏻🫣🥹
oscarpiastri: i was so scared he was going to drop it
ynuser: you and me both osco
muppet4: AWOOGA THATS MY GIRL
ynuser: not the priv too 😭
muppet4: had to make sure you knew i thought you looked hot
carlossainz55: simp 🫵🏻
ynuser: that’s him your honor
maxfewtrell: did you swipe me one of those ornaments
ynuser: yes multiple dw
lilyzneimer: prettiest girl at the party
ynuser: no baby that was you
oscarpiastri: 🫣
ynuser has posted to their story 🔒

view all replies
landonorris: thanks for not posting the strip poker pic 🫣
ynuser: HA i didn’t but i wouldn’t put it past max
maxfewtrell: let’s gooooooo
yourbff: yeeeeee i’m so excited for you
ynuser: eeek me toooooo
pietra.pilao: huge agree 🤍⛷️
ynuser: missed you sm bestie
carlossainz55: where was my invite amiga?
ynuser: mi amigo it was sent but someone said they were busy 🙄
lilyzneimer: wish we were there with you!!! next time 🤍
ynuser: next time pleaseee!! i know i just saw you at the holiday party but my god i already miss you
pietra.pilao has posted to her story

view all story replies
maxfewtrell: what about me???
pietra.pilao: what about you?
maxfewtrell: 🙄
ynuser: my girl 🫶🏻🥹😍😘
pietra.pilao: i love you long time
pietra.pilao: can you just move to london with max and i
ynuser: i love you more 🤍 ill work on getting lan to move to london asap 😍
user2: serving so hard it criminal
landonorris: NO!!! that’s the love of MY life!!!!!
pietra.pilao: get in line
landonorris: god dammit i knew i should never have introduced you two
pietra.pilao: bc she likes me more?
landonorris: yes ���
user1: omg mothers are mothering
yourbff: god i’m so in love with you both
muppet4 posted to their story

view all story replies
elmatador55: this angle makes you look tall
muppet4: thanks mate! i grew a few inches 🙂↔️
maxfewtrell: can’t believe you made me take this to only post it on the priv ?!
ynuser: i wish we could stay like this in our little snow bubble forever
muppet4: same darling. id love to be able to spend every single second of all my time with you but it makes the time we do have that much sweeter 🤍
ynuser: very true sweet boy
muppet4: plusssss you’re coming to more races next season so it wont be as bad i promise
ynuser: starting my full time wag duties 🫡
oscinha: keepin it pg i see
muppet4: always
m4xlol: my eyes 😭
muppet4: close em 😘


landonorris has posted to his story

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iamrebeccad: as you SHOULD!
user4: any day that we get y/n crumbs is a good day
ynuser: thanks for the bag baby 😍
landonorris: anything for my world 😘
ynuser: i love you 🤍
landonorris: god say it again
ynuser: i love you forever
landonorris: mm yeah you do
landonorris: i love you too ❤️
maxverstappen1: she deserves it 😩
landonorris: you right 😔
user18: lando can you fight?
yourbff: this is the richest and bougiest thing i’ve ever seen
landonorris: lv in snow is next level
ynuser has made a post 🔒

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell, iamrebeccad, yourbff, muppet4, maxverstappen1, and 989 others
ynuser: how lucky i am to live this life with you 🤍
view all 57 comments
yourbff: cutie patootie
ynuser: 🥹🤍
carmenmundt: the perfect couple
ynuser: says you and georgie
landonorris: man don’t make me cry
ynuser: ur a cute crier
landonorris: it’s just bc i love you sm
maxverstappen1: he’s the lucky one y/n/n
muppet4: unbelievably lucky mate
maxverstappen1: 👏🏻
pietra.pilao: snow angel 🫶🏻
landonorris has made a post

liked by carlossainz55, mclarenf1, oscarpiastri, lancestroll, georgerussell63, and 657,235 others
landonorris: would give anything for break to never end
view all 644 comments
maxfewtrell: heard the real estate prices are cheaper here than monaco
pietra.pilao: no it’s better in london pls
ynuser: yes lando london is quite nice this time of year i hear
landonorris: yeah no it’s not y/n
maxfewtrell: it’s actually horrible this time of year
user12: god you two are perfect
user23: Y/N CRUMBS YEEEEEE
ynuser: you and that puppy makes me want a puppy
landonorris: i can make that happen
ynuser: 👀🫵🏻🐶
mclarenf1: going to pretend we didn’t see this! you gotta get back on track soon!
user24: y/n is literally so gorgeous how did he bag such a baddie
user19: if my man don’t post me like this i don’t want him
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
a/n: thanks for reading!! likes and reblogs appreciated 🫶🏻
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction
© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform
#f1 fandom#formula 1#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#lando norris smau#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando x reader#ln4 x y/n#ln4 imagine#ln4 fic#ln4 smau#ln4 social media au#lando norris social media au#ln4 x you
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never met - op81 smau
summary: people start making up rumors about oscar and yn. problem is they never actually met
face claim: random girls from pinterest
a/n: this is chaos but it was fun to write hope you like it
masterlist
જ ♡ જ


gossipf1 singer yn and oscar piastri are reported to be dating according to inside sources
view all comments
user5 please let this be true
lando rue, when did this happen?
user14 helppp what is lando doing here
user3 my two worlds colliding
user7 she's not good enough for him
user8 ?? he's not good enough for her
yn inside sources who??? i never saw this man in my life😭😭
user10 he's a formula 1 driver
yn oh i only know lewis hamilton aka the goat aka the loml
user10 fair
yn he looks cute tho👀
sabrinacarpenter no yn!
yn 😊😊
જ ♡ જ
yn posted a story

caption: this is the man yall think i pulled? Damn thank u
replies
↪sabrinacarpenter you are insane😭
↪lando +61 12345678 text him
જ ♡ જ



yn jazzy nights are my favorite
♡liked by sabrinacarpenter, oscarpiastri and others
view all comments
user6 best night of my life
sabrinacarpenter i'm in love with you😍
yn me when i see you
user1 oscar liked...
user4 don't start
user1 i just stated a fact
user9 obsessed with your voice, i want you to sing me to sleep every night
જ ♡ જ

gossipf1 yn and oscar spotted hanging out after her concert
view all comments
user8 i fear this couple would be too iconic
user4 just... no
user5 i dont know this man my ass
yn in my defense i really haven't met him then!
lando it's true i can confirm
lando i can also confirm yn was oscar's most listened artist last year
oscarpiastri why are you here?
lando gossip is my bat signal
જ ♡ જ



yn trip made it out of the groupchat
view all comments
lando groupchat and it's only two people
yn get off my comments
lando i got you his number and this is how you repay me?
user9 lando tell us who it is🙏🏼
user3 if lando set them up it has to be oscar
user7 i'm in love with her aesthetic
user5 white shirt=oscar
user14 stop we don't know
sabrinacarpenter did my invite get lost in the mail?🤨
yn babe i'm sorry he means nothing you are the love of my life
જ ♡ જ
oscarpiastri posted a story

caption good company yn
replies
↪user4 gossipf1 ended up setting you two up huh
↪sabrinacarpenter i remember when i was the one taking her pictures...💔
જ ♡ જ



yn sorry osc i go where lewis goes🏎️
view all comments
oscarpiastri 😐
user4 osc🥺🥺
scuderiaferrari everyone is a ferrari fan ♡liked by author
francocolapinto hamilton fan first, a girlfriend second. i respect that
user5 did he just confirm that they are girlfriend and boyfriend?
mclaren 💔
yn sorry😔
charles_leclerc i approve son oscarpiastri
yn forza ferrari!
user26 we lost her to a sports guy...
જ ♡ જ
oscarpiastri posted a story


caption prettiest girl is in fact my girlfriend
replies
↪yn giggling blushing throwing up kicking my feet🥺🫶🏼
જ ♡ જ
yn posted a story


caption he's still mad i did not wear orange
replies
↪lando it's papaya not orange😡
yn same fucking thing
lando it's not !!
yn ok but the word papaya is so ugly
lando YOU TAKE THAT BACK
જ ♡ જ



yn the rumors are now true, i'm his favorite artist and he's my (second) favorite driver
view all comments
user18 she's gorgeous😍 he's just there😐
francocolapinto yes yes you might kiss but did he ever say he wanted to learn your language just to understand your jokes? i don't think so
yn call me when you are his top artist on spotify loser
user12 don't mind me i'm just patiently waiting for the love songs this will inspire
oscarpiastri you are never going to let me live this down, right?
yn you are stuck with me and my bad jokes sorry bro
sabrinacarpenter just remember she was mine first papaya boy
oscarpiastri noted🫡
જ ♡ જ



oscarpiastri she finally wore papaya
view all comments
user2 she's so hot🥵
yn not that word again😭
lando i will block you if you keep hating on the papaya
yn do it i dare you
yn i look so good tho
oscarpiastri you always look amazing
yn i love me a boy who can sweet talk
lando god stop being cheesy on main🤢
yn weren't you going to block me??
lando i should have
yn just do it you coward
user23 yes yn put the car guy in his place!
lando why are you supporting her when your page is dedicated to me??? are you a fan or a hater?
user23 i'm your biggest fan! but i support women's rights and women's wrongs so i'm with yn
yn HA even your fans like me better😛
lando you stole my teammate and now my fans what else do you want from me😭😭
જ ♡ જ
lando posted a story

caption disgusting
replies
↪yn disgustingly cute yes
lando whatever helps you sleep at night
જ ♡ જ
oscarpiastri posted a story

caption dont let their online banter fool you, they are friends
replies
↪yn babe don't expose us like that😔
જ ♡ જ

oscarpiastri 🧡
view all comments
yn DELETE what if lewis sees this?
user21 she's so real
lewishamilton i feel betrayed
yn nooo💔😔 you will always be n1 in my heart
oscarpiastri 😐
yn deal with it
yn i am so incredibly proud of you and i love supporting you🥺🧡
oscarpiastri thank you for being here<3
જ ♡ જ
yn posted a story

caption i'm going to tell my kids this is their dad
જ ♡ જ
yn posted a story

caption just kidding, i love you oscar
replies
↪ oscarpiastri i love you more❤️
#f1 smau#oscar piastri smau#formula 1 smau#f1 fic#oscar piastri fic#formula 1 fic#f1 au#oscar piastri au#formula 1 au#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 fanfic#oscar piastri fanfic#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri x reader#formula 1 fanfiction#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1 fanfic#op81 smau#op81 au#op81 x you#op81 x reader#op81 fic#oscar piastri fluff
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soft lauch? - 𝐜𝐬𝟓𝟓 ✽
✿ carlos sainz x influencer!reader
✿ y/n and carlos try to soft launch their relationship but his millennial mind can’t comprehend the idea
✫ i got a little crazy at the end guys so i sincerely apologize for that also there’s a age gap…i’m sorry i’m obsessed with them sue me
🝮🝮🝮
definitelynotyn

liked by pierregasly and 113 others
definitelynotyn is it time to start soft launching?
carlossainz55 Mi corazón I need you to explain a soft launch to me again
⤷ alexandrasaintmleux everyone take a minute to pray for y/n
♥︎ by author
landonorris LONGGGGG over due
⤷ definitelynotyn we’ve just been waiting for the right time
francisca.cgomes soft launch us? fs
⤷ definitelynotyn let’s go over the captions
⤷ carlossainz55 Alrighty then!
⤷ pierregasly idc how many years go by i’ll never get used to this
⤷ definitelynotyn cry about it
⤷ pierregasly i will
charles_leclerc You would hope so after almost 4 years of dating
⤷ definitelynotyn it’s not our fault we can keep a secret sharl
⤷ charles_leclerc What’s that supposed to mean 🤨
lilymhe carlos sainz deserves to be locked up for going after my little kitten when she turned 18 😾
⤷ carlossainz55 Your just mad I got rizz
⤷ lilymhe obviously not that good if your girl is eating lunch with me rn
⤷ carlossainz55 @definitelynotyn Come home baby the kids miss you
⤷ definitelynotyn omw 😍
⤷ lilymhe damn…someone took my bitch
georgerussell63 Nah i’m waiting for the hard launch engagement post
⤷ carlossainz55 😏
alex_albon bros gonna catch a case 😭
⤷ danielricciardo He’s ready to risk it all
🝮
yn

liked by carlossainz55 and 6,924,085 others
yn so baby girl coded 🎀
charles_leclerc My eyes 😓
⤷ yn oh please spare me the dramatics
landonorris you two make me sick 🤢
⤷ yn all i’m seeing is a bunch of hating jealous bitches 🤧🥱
hoeforsainzzz guys…that watch looks pretty familiar
f1wags 👀👀👀
smoothoperator55 yk…i’ve spent some time memorizing the arms and hands of the f1 drivers and let me tell you…that’s gotta be carlos sainz 👁️👁️
ynstan4lyfe some of you guys need to except the fact that carlos and her are just friends and nothing more
carlossainz55 Lucky guy
this comment has been deleted
operatorsainz ik ya’ll seen that 🫣
danielricciardo How many times must I remind you that children are on this app
⤷ yn it’s not my fault if they see it the age requirement is 13 🤓
🝮
carlossainz55

liked by lewishamilton and 9,813,762 others
carlossainz55 4 years with you by my side ♥️
charles_leclerc Tell her to cut her claws it looks like you asked a bear to scratch your back
⤷ hoeforsainzzz HELLOOOO??????
carlossainzappendix HELLO THATS THE SAME PICTURE Y/N POSTED IN HER SOFT LAUNCH STHU
landonorris bless carlos and his millennial mind 😞
iliveforcarlossainz welp this definitely wasn’t on my 2024 bingo card
hearts4lando SHUT THE HELL UP 4 YEARS AND WE HAD NO CLUE?
flowersforyn sooo…we’re not gonna talk about the 8 year age gap?
⤷ alex_albon no his lawyers are on speed dial he was ready to risk it all
⤷ yn shut up albono
yn oh baby 😭
⤷ carlossainz55 Did I do it wrong?
⤷ yn yeah but it’s the thought that counts
maxverstappen1 Almost had it mate
alexandrasaintmleux whoever didn’t pray for y/n this is your fault
🝮
definitelynotyn


liked by schecoperez and 98 others
definitelynotyn why is bro tryna rizz me up
francisca.cgomes HAHAHA HES SO OLD WHO TYPES WITH AUTO CAPS
⤷ carlossainz55 Mature adults
⤷ definitelynotyn excuse me?
⤷ carlossainz55 I can never win
⤷ lilymhe HAHAHA THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR MESSING UP HER SOFT LAUNCH
charles_leclerc He actually was sweating like a bitch when he realized he posted the same picture
lewishamilton Roscoe misses his godmother he’s in need for a visit
⤷ definitelynotyn stop i’m coming over tmr
oscarpiastri 29 year old spaniard seen running around paddock looking disheveled and almost in tears after the realization hit that he ruined his girlfriends soft launch
⤷ definitelynotyn thanks for the update osc
carlossainz55 Babe please i’m on my knees begging forgive me
⤷ landonorris stand up carlos
⤷ definitelynotyn don’t you have a race to lose or something?
⤷ landonorris maybe in a different lifetime…you aren’t my bully 😔
⤷ definitelynotyn oh go cry me a river
⤷ landonorris i will
alexandrasaintmleux i wish charles was this down bad for me
⤷ charles_leclerc Girl………..
⤷ yn is what you are? 🤣🤣🤣
⤷ charles_leclerc You are my biggest hater
⤷ definitelynotyn proudly
🝮
yn

liked by haileybieber and 10,172,253 others
yn ruined my soft launch but it’s ok cause the D is fire 🔥 yeah, i said it.
carlossainz55 Mi corazón es tuyo ♥️
⤷ yn ♥️
charles_leclerc You guys should pay for my therapy since i’ve spent the last 4 years sleeping in the room next to yours
⤷ carlossainz55 Get ear plugs
ynlos ik those bitches are like bunnies 🫣
hoeforsainzzz y/n giving us a little snack 😩
ynstan4lyfe i would like to take back what i said on her soft launch
danielricciardo Your pr managers are quaking with rage right now I know it
⤷ yn i was gonna say something but then i chose peace 😇
⤷ georgerussell63 That’s a first
⤷ yn alright bro your entire existence is a meme calm down 🤣🤣
⤷ georgerussell63 I can always count on you to make me cry
🝮
carlossainz55

liked by lissiemackintosh and 9,019,723 others
carlossainz55 Dibs
francisca.cgomes WOAH THERE BUDDY
arthur_leclerc that’s enough instagram for the day.
landonorris my poor eyes
yn best pillow 😇
⤷ carlossainz55 Just for you
ynissocutiepatootie her side profile 😍😍
ynsmywife carlos sainz can’t handle allat
carlando this altered my brain chemistry
carlitossainz brotha don’t know what to do with allat
charles_leclerc Every time I open this app man I can’t escape it 💔
⤷ yn is that a little bitch i hear?
⤷ charles_leclerc You wound me
maxverstappen1 Wasn’t prepared for that
carlossainz55 All you bitches can stay mad
🝮
yns.asskisser

liked by oscarpiastri and 84 others
yns.asskisser Date night with the missus
yn WOOF WOOF MEOW 😍😘😋👅🤤 SMASH SMASH SMASH YOU CAN HAVE IT ANY DAY ANY WHERE ANY TIME
⤷ yns.asskisser I love u mami
yn do you want head?
⤷ yns.asskisser Always baby 😘
⤷ charles_leclerc JUST BECAUSE THIS IS A PRIVATE ACCOUNT DOESNT MEAN OTHER PEOPLE CANT SEE IT
landonorris aw you sick bastard
lilymhe what is it finna play…WOAHHHH
alexandrasaintmleux i miss the person i was 10 seconds ago
francisca.cgomes you and y/n put 50 shades of grey to SHAME
alex_albon so who’s coming to church with me and lily on sunday? 😇
⤷ pierregasly me and kika
⤷ charles_leclerc Me and alexandra
⤷ oscarpiastri me and lily
⤷ danielricciardo Me
⤷ schecoperez Me
⤷ maxverstappen1 Me
⤷ yukitsunoda0511 Me
⤷ lewishamilton Me and roscoe
⤷ georgerussell63 Me and carmen
⤷ landonorris me
⤷ joris__trouche me
⤷ lance_stroll me
⤷ logansargeant me
⤷ fernandoalo_oficial Me
⤷ yn ya’ll mad i’m getting my world rocked every night 🤪🤪
♥︎ by author
#f1 smau#carlos sainz#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz imagine#carlos sainz fluff#carlos sainz smut#carlos sainz smau#f1 imagine#f1
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Fan Favorite (FC43)
summary: franco and y/n are everyone's favorite couple in the paddock. they serve, fans eat it up - simple as that.
franco colapinto x driver!reader
based on two different requests I got
cw: google translated spanish, lando and y/n are friends but they're hating on each other, franco is a simp, smidge of williams slander
fc: emily carey




liked by yourusername, williamsracing, oscarpiastri and 250,674 more
francolapinto: te amo mucho, mi corazon
tagged: yourusername
comments:
yourusername: te amo <3
user3442: oh to be franco colapinto
user332: franco can you fight?
landonorris: that last photo was a bit tmi
yourusername: no one made you look norizz landonorris: you're so mean
ynupdates: when I'm in a who's a bigger y/n fan competition but my opponent is franco
francolapinto: my beautiful girl
user33: dude this is your own post
user201: oh to be loved the way franco loves y/n



liked by francolapinto, williamsracing, landonorris and 1.547.365 more
yourusername: it's race weekend baby!
tagged: francolapinto, williamsracing
comments:
williamsracing: our favorite driver is back in the garadge
francolapinto: mi hermosa novia
francolapinto: mygirlmygirlmygirl
user323: another day of franco being in the likes before me
user22: franco's in the likes before the photos are even posted atp
landonorris: can't wait to outscore you again
yourusername: dude I'm driving a williams?! yourusername: admin don't look
ynnation: prettiest driver



ynupdates: franco looking at y/n is all of us
comments:
user221: no because that caption is so real
ynsbettercar: they're so obsessed with each other it's not even fair
f1fanat1c: find someone who looks at you the way franco looks at y/n
user553: so real, because if he's not like this then I don't want him
mclursa: praying for a relationship like theirs
th3ssf: they are the standard
livelughsformula: no because this is how franco looks at y/n 😍
user44: I too would look at my girlfriend like that if she was y/n l/n


f1wagupdates: y/n and franco spotted out having breakfast
comments:
oneonef: love how f1 wags posted this
user443: franco is y/n's wag first, williams driver second
ynupdates: fav couple
user090: they're so cute together
usrrs: having a relationship like theirs is not a want it's a need atp
usef1: mama and papa
user442: same, except I'm older than them
userrr: franco and y/n are why I believe in love



liked by landonorris, francolapinto, oscarpiastri and 998.546 more
yourusername: national boyfriend day post
tagged: francolapinto
comments:
francolapinto: ai corazon, you said you wouldn't post these
yourusername: I lied
username43: franco looks so cute with those glasses
use221: why is he looking at me like that
landonorris: the 3rd picture is unsettling me
yourusername: scroll away bitch landonorris: *gasp*
francolapinto: te amo te amo te amo
yourusername: <3
carmenmmundt: I came here for a pretty girl instead I got a Franco post
yourusername: you can come over instead ;) francolapinto: on a post appreciating me? yourusername: shh fran, I'm shooting my shot
userrrsa: googling how to become franco colapinto, brb



liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, yourusername and 896.554 more
francolapinto: girlfriend appreciation post
tagged: yourusername
comments:
yourusername: you said the first picture would never see light of day
francolapinto: not nice being lied to is it?
user443: y/n's slaying no matter what
userrr2: mother is mothering
user445: franco can you fight?
francolapinto: 👍👍
yourusername: idk if I feel appreciated enough
francolapinto: wait until I get back home and I'll appreciate you some more user003: do you need a third?
user332: y/n l/n the most beautiful woman
thsfd3: get mother something better than a williams pls
user992: if they break up I'll kill myself, no cap
userrrw: real
#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#formula one imagine#f1 x female reader#f1 x you#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1#f1 smau#franco colapinto x you#franco colapinto x reader#franco colapinto#franco colapinto fic#fc43 x reader#fc43 x you#fc43 imagine
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙one of the girls | DR3 ˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: daniel ricciardo x northern english!reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au
warnings: none just fluff, pretty short too
summary: in which your new boyfriend is adopted into your friendship group as if he was one of the girls
a/n: this is saur funnie to me & lbr it's me & my bffs only wish in life to go for pints with daniel & this request inspired me af
request!!!: hiiiii can i pls req daniel ricciardo x northern english!reader pleaseeeee kiss kiss kiss
my masterlist
fc: various brunette girls from pinterest

messages ->

instagram ->
yourusername posted a story

liked by danielricciardo, yourbff, and others
yourbff pints
friend1 pints
friend2 pints
danielricciardo pints?
yourusername YES PINTS
user1 PINTS!!!
user2 lol i love u y/n
user3 pints pints pints
yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, yourbff, and others
yourusername self explanatory really
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user4 funniest wag tbh
user5 i wish i could go on a night out with them omg
user6 same omg my dream
maxverstappen1 i wasnt invited?
yourusername are you one of the girls, max?
maxverstappen1 im a man?
yourusername see there's ur first problem
user7 LOL he absolutely has no idea what she's on about whatsoever
user8 daniel dating a british girl is my fav thing ever
user9 literally especially a northern girl and not jus a rich girl from london 😭😭
user10 fr im obsessed with her she dgaf
user11 she is so jarring
user12 u jus dont get her tbh
danielricciardo woo hoo
yourusername lol i am obsessed with you.
user13 HAHAHA what? she's so me
yourbff BEER CIRCLE BEER CIRCLE
friend2 it's a heart ❤️!
danielricciardo beer heart. where have you been y/bff/n
yourbff sorry i was busy drinking the beer not analysing what shape it was in.
twitter ->
instagram ->
yourbff

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yourbff beach day with the girls!!! and daniel
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user21 and daniel omg HAHA
user22 he's actually one of the girls omg i thought it was a joke...
landonorris my invite got lost?
yourusername YOU DONT DESERVE ONE
landonorris oh.
yourbff hahahahaha
danielricciardo sorry lando 🤐
user23 y/n & her one sided beef w lando is all of us
liked by yourbff
user24 oh to be in this friend group
user25 not the weirdest f1 related friend group
yourusername love my girls!!! and my daniel
liked by yourbff, danielricciardo
friend2 hahahah we love him too! thts our girl
friend1 FR!!!!! one of us one of us
danielricciardo omg i've never felt so welcome in my life... #newhome
yourbff honorary brit 🇬🇧
yourusername 🥹🥹🥹
messages ->

instagram ->
danielricciardo posted a story

liked by maxverstappen1, yourbff, and others
user26 the giiiirls
user27 you & the girls again!
maxverstappen1 miss you babe
danielricciardo 😂 see you in aus soon i hope
landonorris are any of them single 👀
danielricciardo not for you, no
landonorris boo 👎
user28 such a cute lil family
user29 cant tell if im more jealous of daniel, y/n, or her friends
yourusername posted a story

liked by danielricciardo, landonorris, and others
user30 stop it
user31 #1 wag forever and ever
user32 THIS IS TOO CUTE FOR A RANDOM THURSDAY MORNING
maxverstappen1 😍😍😍
liked by yourusername
user33 FREE USSS
user34 jealous
yourbff pints pints pints tonight?
yourusername obviously
twitter ->
instagram ->
danielricciardo

liked by yourusername, lewishamilton, and others
danielricciardo my home 🇦🇺 away from home 🇬🇧
view all comments
user40 no beers in the photo dump 😮
user41 let me guess ur on photographer duty
liked by danielricciardo
user42 the third pic ahhhh so cute
user43 oh to be ✨ them ✨
friend2 our fav aussie always!!!
danielricciardo im honoured truly
friend1 we never wanna leave
yourbff let's all live here woohoo
danielricciardo true. im down
yourusername YIPPPEEE
user44 ugh me when
landonorris i can make the next trip :)
danielricciardo oh where you going?
yourusername & who with? coz i know it isnt us
landonorris ...worth a try i guess
yourusername I LOVE YOU!!!
danielricciardo i love you my sweet girl
THE END 💙
#f1#f1 fanfic#f1 smau#f1 fic#f1 x reader#smau#f1 imagine#daniel ricciardo#dr3#dr3 smau#dr3 x yn#dr3 fluff#dr3 x reader#dr3 imagine#maddie's smau
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More of the yandere monster???? Like their married life, him being such a cutie cutie and the reader is a willing person to his yandere tendencies. Like him physically fighting someone for flirting with her for .01 second and her just being 😍🥰
Yandere! Monster Husband x Reader
A little change of plans and the wedding you've been kidnapped for continued without a hitch, except you married the monstrous sibling instead. Made for an awkward celebratory dinner, but no one dared to oppose the Beast.
Content: female reader, monster romance, mildly NSFW, saga of the monster hoe reader continues
[First part]
The next family dinner was quiet. You couldn't help but wonder if your horniness had gone too far, slowly chewing your food and occasionally peeking at the ex-groom with remorseful eyes. Poor guy, you thought. "Well, it's quite convenient, isn't it?" he finally said, breaking the silence. The cutlery sounds paused, and you lifted your gaze again. The man flashed you a radiant smile, which emphasized his handsome features even more. "I mean, we weren't sure we'd ever find a wife for my brother. He has a bit of an attitude, and even monsters are afraid of him. The only marriage attempt-" his speech was interrupted by a grunt, and you turned towards your monstrous boyfriend. The older sibling was frowning, visibly embarrassed. "Oh, I remember!" the mother of the siblings, a halfling herself, suddenly chuckled into her glass, taking a generous sip before continuing: "We'd arranged for a fellow monster to meet him, and the poor soul got so frightened she blended in with the background! Took us two days to find her! She came from a chameleon family, I recall."
Everyone at the table began to laugh and you joined, although with a mild annoyance tinged into your voice. So what, there was no reason for you to be plagued by guilt? You even refused a night escapade with your boyfriend until things "settled", as a way to be respectful towards the cucked party. All for naught. At least now you could be ravaged without further consequences. When the mother in law had pulled you aside hours earlier to make sure you weren't coerced into this arrangement, you had to hold back from crassly confessing you'd slurp her son empty of fluids at any hour of the day. Some things are better left untold.
Unfortunately, one detail couldn't be changed in time: the guest list. As this had been an event meant to strengthen the ties between humans, no one outside of the immediate family graced the venue with their monstrous presence. Many guests were intrigued by the outcome of the affair, terribly curious to see the famed wife-to-be of the gruesome, feared Head of the royal army. Even more so once they discovered it was a regular human by all means. "Fascinating!", the old ladies would occasionally cry out, clutching the plump, expensive pearls adorning their necks. You had to frequently excuse yourself in order to dodge the rather indecent questions regarding your relationship. Except when you did manage to sneak away, one of the younger men of names and titles you never registered would approach you for a dance. "Truly a pitiful matter", they'd whisper much too close to your ear. "You would've made a lovely bride for a fellow human."
"You're unexpectedly calm about this", the prince mentioned to his older brother at some point during the wedding night. "Are you not bothered by all the acquaintances flocking to your bride?" The monster shook his head with a sigh. He hadn't known you for that long yet, but one thing he was certain of: it's not humans he needed to fear.
Indeed, having a wife with a monster kink is particularly challenging when most of the husband's work involves similar creatures. The first months after the marriage were stalked by the insidious doubt that his luck was just that: mere coincidence. Would you have displayed the same interest had he not been the only beast at the table? Would you still pick him in a room full of monsters? Such questions followed him each day, feeding into an ever-growing jealousy.
"What are you doing here!", he exclaimed in despair once he noticed your arrival at his training camp. "You forgot your lunch", you explained, eyebrows raised in confusion. Oh, for fuck's sake. He quickly pulled you away, glaring at the subordinates startled by the commotion. They must've been eyeing (Y/N) like rabid dogs, he thought. Next thing you know, you'll be scooped away by some horned scoundrel. He can't have that.
Initially, the rage-filled, obsession-driven fuck you'd receive almost daily was welcomed with shameless begging. The way your monster husband would pin you down under his claws and thrust into you so hard, you could see its movement in waves across your stomach. The way he'd forcefully spread your legs, hungrily sinking his nails into the soft flesh of your thighs and gnawing your shoulders in delirious need. The tears that sheepishly formed in the corners of your hooded eyes would only incite him more. "Bite onto my hand if you can't take it anymore", he'd coo without stopping. As much as you liked to be left a limp, drooling mess, the soreness grew unbearable. Enough was enough when you found yourself carrying a cushion to sit down on any surface.
"Listen, we need to have a talk." You greeted him solemnly once he returned from his military duties. Oh, no. Absolutely not. The monstrous husband bit his lips in panic, immediately going through a mental list of all his subordinates. Or was it someone in the family that slithered their way into your heart? Is that what it was about, that you'd found a different creature? No matter, you weren't going anywhere. "I don't want to hear about it", he declared dramatically. "I have a bruised cervix!" you shouted in disbelief. "Huh?" He stared at you. "It hurts even when I lay down, man. You have to tone it down. At least for a little while."
Ah. Awkward. You noticed his flinch, and patted the empty seat next to you. "What did you think I was going to say?" The bench groaned under the weight of his gargantuan body. Hands folded in his lap like a punished schoolboy, your husband began to narrate the tale of his seething envy and frenzied passion for you. You must understand, he's never cared for anyone as much. To hell with duty and honor, he would kill his own father if his touch on you lingered one second longer than permitted. "Alright, but you must control yourself a little", you reminded him gently. "Never, my urge to obliterate any threat in my path is insatiable", he concluded with vehemence. "Yes, yes, that I understand. The sex, I mean", you gesticulated. "Of course. My apologies, I got sidetracked."
Somehow, he didn't expect to leave this conversation with a cathartic approval of his possessiveness. "Surely you must be upset by my fanatical behavior", he suggested meekly. "Oh no, it's part of your charm", you reassured him with a smile. "It's just not that sustainable in bed without the occasional break." You pat your stomach to express your misfortune.
Sadly, your monster fucking dreams must adhere to the laws of biology.
#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere x darling#yandere monster#yandere monster x reader#monster x reader#monster x human#terato#teratophillia#yandere headcanons#yandere imagines#yandere scenarios#monster imagine#monster romance#monster husband#monster smut#monster fucker#female reader
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baby alonso
charles leclerc x alonso!reader
warnings - swearing, google translate spanish, dad!fernando, tomfoolery + shenanigans (it is alonso!reader so are we suprised), i think that's it xoxo
face claim - girls on pinterest



y/n.alonso



liked by astonmartinf1, fernandoalo_oficial and 409,345 others
y/n.alonso: causing chaos in the aston garage per usual 😘
comments
astonmartinf1: not too much chaos though... right
y/n.alonso: of course
fernandoalo_oficial: my daughter is an angel and can do no wrong 🤨
user1: praise the alonso father daughter duo we all say in unison
user2: and to think this man committed war crimes
y/n.alonso: allegedly* 🙄
liked by fernandoalo_oficial
fernandoalo_oficial: now that you finished with that waste of time you can come to every race just like when you were little cariño!!
y/n.alonso: by 'that waste of time' do you mean the university that you payed for?
fernandoalo_oficial: yes i'm glad we are on the same page mija 🩷
user3: you heard it here first fernando alonso says university isn't important
astonmartinf1: this is not the view if the aston martin f1 team or any of our sponsors
user4: is he trying to kill admin?
astonmartinf1: i fear he might be 🥲
user5: baby alonso is the paddock princess
user6: she is living the dream for real
y/n.alonso: it is pretty sweet being a nepo child 💪
lance_stroll: you know it 😎
user7: i'm praying for aston points
y/n.alonso: hang on i'll pull some strings brb
y/n.alonso: dad! lance! score some points!
liked by astonmartinf1
user8: she's so pretty 😍
charles_leclerc: she really is
carlossainz55: bro do you actually have a death wish
fernandoalo_oficial: i'll see you on the track leclerc 🙂
y/n.alonso: papá!
astonmartinf1



liked by fernandoalo_oficial, y/n.alonso and 245,071 others
tagged: fernandoalo_oficial, lance_stroll and y/n.alonso
astonmartinf1: race weekend with a special guest 😉
comments
user9: we love baby alonso
user10: BABY ALONSO
user11: get her to sort aston martin tf out
y/n.alonso: guys i'm trying my best 😔
fernandoalo_oficial: mija lawrence is going to make me go to another pr training session if you keep doing this
user12: the king can't get locked up in pr jail!!
charles_leclerc: i might have to swing by the aston garage 😉
fernandoalo_oficial: you might fucking not
charles_leclerc: yes fernando, sorry fernando
user13: charles is going to get himself run off the track
user14: charles is a braver man than me fernando might kill him
y/n.alonso: thank you for having me! it's always so so much fun 🩷
liked by astonmartinf1
user15: petition for y/n to be at every race ever please
user16: where do i sign
user17: her paddock fits are literally everything to me
lance_stroll: she has started to give me fashion tips to 'inspire' me please don't encourage her
danielricciardo: you might want to start taking the advice...
lance_stroll: oh 😦
fernandoalo_oficial



liked by y/n.alonso, charles_leclerc and 324,391 others
fernandoalo_oficial: i think i need to fire my new race engineer she's mean
comments
y/n.alonso: boo 👎👎
fernandoalo_oficial: don't boo your own father
y/n.alonso: don't be a boring old man
sebastianvettel: she's got you there mate
fernandoalo_oficial: what the fuck are you doing here!?
jensonbutton: she gagged you fr 💅
aussiegrit: ate and left no crumbs
sebastianvettel: slay 💋
fernandoalo_oficial: what is actually happening
user18: i swear they will never miss an opportunity to try humble nando
liked by sebastianvettel, jensonbutton and aussiegrit
user19: i'm sure charles wouldn't mind having y/n as a race engineer
fernandoalo_oficial: no.
user20: the way i would never speak again
user21: noo i would love them together
liked by charles_leclerc
user22: in my head they ARE together
astonmartinf1: i mean we did get points this weekend soooo...
y/n.alonso: you're welcome xxx
y/n.alonso



liked by charles_leclerc, astonmartinf1 and 283,912 others
y/n.alonso: home sweet home 🏠
comments
user23: how is charles always in the likes before me? i have notifications on?!?
charles_leclerc: you snooze you lose mate
user24: he really is just like us (in love with y/n)
user25: too bad he's too scared of alonso to do anything about it 🤷♀️
yourbestfriend: your outfits always eat pretty girl!
y/n.alonso: aww thank you baby
user26: oh to be called baby by y/n
liked by charles_leclerc
fernandoalo_oficial: have fun!
fernandoalo_oficial: not too much fun though be careful and safe
y/n.alonso: yes papa
user27: he forgot who his daughter was for a second there
liked by fernandoalo_oficial
astonmartinf1: see you next race week!
y/n.alonso: wouldn't miss it!
user28: yesss
iamrebeccad: i miss you (and your gossip)
y/n.alonso: miss you too (don't worry i have plenty more)
user29: show it to me rachel!!!!
charles_leclerc: i'm in madrid too we should meet up
fernandoalo_oficial: what are you doing??
y/n.alonso: i might take you up on that offer cha 🤭
fernandoalo_oficial: noooo stop this
user30: this is sending me 😂
user31: the way they are fully ignoring him
user32: i won't ever get over y/n calling him cha
liked by charles_leclerc
charles_leclerc



liked by y/n.alonso, carlossainz55and 592,842 others
charles_leclerc: time to unwind
comments
user33: wait is that y/n???
user34: it totally looks like her
user35: my chay/n heart can't take this
user36: the matching shirt with the dress? please!!!
user37: charles + spain = slaggy pictures
user38: and we thank him for it
liked by y/n.alonso
user39: omg y/n does not give a fuck
carlossainz55: where was my invite bro?
charles_leclerc: i'm so sorry i was too busy...
carlosainz55: i thought it was bros before hoes
chalres_leclerc: nah my hoe is 4 life
user40: so unserious i swear
pierregasly: i love knowing things nobody else knows
user41: tell me please
user42: pierre is my biggest opp rn
pierregasly: don't hate the player hate the game
user43: he is the king of gossip
liked by charles_leclerc
user44: i've been manifesting this for months i hope it's y/n
user45: oh so you're crazy crazy?
y/n.alonso
liked by yourbestfriend, charles_leclerc and 12,812 others
caption- look who i bumped into 😉
replies
charles_leclerc: you say this like we didn't come here together
y/n.alonso: i'm trying to be mysterious and nonchalant
charles_leclerc: dork 🤓
y/n.alonso: you know you love it
user46: OMG
user47: this is so important to me
fernandoalo_oficial: tell him not to try anything
y/n.alonso: whatever papa 🙄
charles_leclerc



liked by y/n.alonso, carlossainz55 and 872,849 others
tagged: y/n.alonso
charles_leclerc: happy 6 months mon amour 🩷
comments
user48: they are already my favorite couple ever
user49: the way i will be yapping about them i am about to get at least 10 times more annoying
user50: as you should tbh
user51: i'm so so happy for them but this might take fernando out
user52: i just know he is being restrained by aston martin rn so he can't comment
astonmartinf1: 🤐
user53: the goat is being silenced
pierregasly: now the secret is out i feel less special
user54: it's a tough life out here for the gossipy hoes
pierregasly: don't i know it
y/n.alonso: i love you
charles_leclerc: i love you more
user55: ew are they going to start being sappy on main now
pierregasly: i fear they might
liked by charles_leclerc and y/n.alonso
oscarpiastri: bwoah
user56: felt that
user57: charles has... game?
maxverstappen1: we are all as surprised as you are mate
user58: flabbergasted fr
maxverstappen1: he bamboozled us all with his loserness
user59: max i know you're not talking rn
y/n.alonso
liked by iamrebeccad, charles_leclerc and 17251 others
caption- this jacket looks supa cute!
replies
fernandoalo_oficial: ewww it's so ugly 🤢
y/n.alonso: papa i'm sorry for not telling you about charles earlier
fernandoalo_oficial: i'm not over it yet i feel betrayed
fernandoalo_oficial: i just need time mija
y/n.alonso: you are so dramatic old man
fernandoalo_oficial: what the sigma?
user60: my favorite wag and nepo baby
charles_leclerc: please tell me you bought it mon coeur
y/n.alonso: yep! and when you get back to the hotel i'll be waiting for you wearing just that
charles_leclerc: fuck i'm on my way right now i'll just get the food delivered you aren't going anywhere
y/n.alonso: yes sir
charles_leclerc: you kill me cherie
user61: I JUST KNOW CHARLES IS LOSING HIS SHIT
charles_leclerc



liked by yourbestfriend, fernandoalo_oficial and 436,592 others
tagged: y/n.alonso
charles_leclerc: my ferrari girl ❤️
comments
fernandoalo_oficial: i'm still mad but no one told me but this is actually kind of cute ig
charles_leclerc: woo he likes me now
y/.alonso: don't push it amor 💋
user62: i'm sobbing he loves her so much
user63: if my bf ain't like this then i don't want it
y/n.alonso: he is pretty great icl
fernandoalo_oficial: i think i preferred when i didn't know about this... now you don't shut up about him
user64: she is so me
y/n.alonso: i'm you're ferrari girl
charles_leclerc: that's right baby
user65: shut up shut up i can't handle this
user66: they are literally everything
user67: i don't know how charles managed to hide this for 6 months
user68: now he posts y/n all the time 🤭
user69: ikr its so cute!!
carlossainz55: he can't keep a secret to save his life so he just yapped to me and pierre all. the. time
pierregasly: and he wasn't exactly subtle in the comments 🤨
scuderiaferrari: y/n is a ferrari girl confirmed 😦
liked by y/n.alonso
user70: everyone is a ferrari fan
user71: even if they are not, they are a ferrari fan
a/n - thank you for reading i hope you enjoyed and as always any feedback is apppreciated <3
#f1#formula 1#charles leclerc#cl16#charles leclerc x reader#cl16 x reader#charles leclerc smau#f1 x reader#charles leclerc x you#f1 x y/n#charles leclerc x y/n#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 x you#🏎️#charles leclerc social media au#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc fluff
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i'll love you forever
pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader
summary: you were sunghoon's first everything; first friend, first love, and first heartbreak. after years of quietly crushing on you, he was finally ready to confess. so ready to confess, that he told his parents the two of you were already dating! it was an easy enough lie to keep up and he kept it up for months, what could possibly go wrong? he thought. little did he know, you would have a falling out and stop talking for months.. and then, you'd both get invited to spend a week at home with his parents, who still believe you're his girlfriend.
genre: smut, fluff, angst, college au, childhood best friends to lovers, fake dating
warnings: minors dni, fake dating is pretty mild (sorry), she kinda doesn’t rate him at the start, these two kind of exist in a vacuum a little bit idk i had a self-enforced word count to stick to and broke it.. (im within the 10% allowance !), sunghoon in a vest, sunghoon arms, sunghoon
word count: 21,858
playlist: click here.. (for my non-spotify babes, the main song is light by wave to earth (which for some reason i put last.. whatever))
author's note: for silly @asahicore. happy birthday pooks i hope it's amazing and that u enjoy reading this when u have the time !!! LOL (lots of love) also im never writing without telling you things again this was so absurd.
to everyone else.. ok happy reading also emma did not beta read this so im sure it's missing its charm .. anyway it's for emma not you 😭 anyway i hope u enjoy regardless and lmk ur thoughts! omg this is the first fic im nervous about posting.......... please enjoy or else.
In the three years since Park Sunghoon moved away for university, he’d been doing a pretty good job of going home to see his parents. They’d welcome their baby back to the nest with open arms and wide grins. With a rehearsed level of indifference, his younger sister, Yeji, would say, “Oh, I didn’t know you were coming home this weekend.” when she saw him at the dinner table. Sunghoon pretended to only be marginally hurt by this.
In the last three months, he hasn’t so much as sent a text to his parents.
Or to you.
Ignoring texts from his mother is devastating. Between classes, he watches as, “Hi, sweetie, I love you 😍,” turns into, “Missing you, honey, know you must be busy but spare some time for your old mummy, no?” which turns into, “Getting really worried now, are you doing okay? Has something happened with YN? Talk to me, I love you, my baby boy!”
Ignoring texts from you is easy because texts from you never come.
Sitting at the end of his bed, Sunghoon rereads a text his mother sent a few minutes ago: Please talk to me, son. Really worried and YN isn’t answering calls either. What’s going on with you two?
When he leaves his room, he finds Jake lying on the couch, and with his keys in hand, Sunghoon says, “I’m going home.”
And the drive is great! At least, he tells his mum it is. In truth, the drive home without you was nearly impossible. Your ever-expanding home time playlist buzzed through the speakers in his car, but without you there to screech along to the songs, it wasn’t the same. He felt your absence the most when he stopped to get petrol and you weren’t there behind him struggling to carry enough snacks to feed a small family without offering to pay.
The look of worry on his mum’s face stirs a pit in his stomach. “Why are you so quiet these days? God, you look so tired,” she says, frowning. “Is it school? Or something with YN? It’s not like her not to text back.” Her brows crease as she whispers the word unless. She pulls him into a hug, her chin resting perfectly on his shoulder, and her comforting hand strokes the hair on the back of his head. “Breakups are never easy, honey. I’m so sorry, I know how much you love her.”
Breakups are never easy. The sentence hangs heavy over his head.
Whether she knows it or not, she’s handed him a get-out-of-jail-free card, the opportunity to set things straight, to end this mess once and for all. No further questions, and most importantly, no more lies.
For the first time since he left your flat three months ago, Sunghoon lets himself cry. He’d imagined this moment countless times, his first cry since you ended things. In his mind, it was always intense. Today, as it happens, only a few salty tears leak from his eyes, spilling onto the cuff of his sleeve, darkening the blue cotton in tiny indigo splotches.
“We didn’t break up,” he says in a small voice—for some reason. “I’m just having a hard time.” Neither statement is technically untrue, but the words taste rotten in his mouth.
The tightening grip of his mum’s arms around his body is what brings on the harsh, shoulder-racking sobs he’d been anticipating. For a while, they stand like this, Sunghoon weeping into his mum’s cardigan until she sends him upstairs to lie down, promising a cup of tea that never comes.
His childhood bedroom is chilly, so he changes into clothes he left behind and climbs into bed, pulling his duvet up to his chin. He turns his head to look at the walls and the room around him, everything is exactly where he left it in the summer. It should be comforting, but it’s weird to be home without you.
There are photos of you and him everywhere, growing up and around each other through different stages of life. The two of you together during the summer your family moved in next door, you wore glasses back then and were the first friend he’d made in his life. Sunbathing and sharing earphones at the beach, listening to music together on your iPod classic. Sunghoon in thick glasses with a stiff smile and your arm around him on the first day of high school. Wide grins at the start of this summer, the last time things were okay between you.
Overwhelmed, he stares up at the ceiling, only realising he’s crying when a hot tear slips from his eyes to tickle his ear. Because Sunghoon likes to upset himself, he screws his eyes shut and thinks about the night before you stopped talking.
Though he didn’t know it at the time, you’d left Yeonjun’s place to sit with him in a tiny restaurant on campus, the one you’d only visit to toast to each other’s heartbreaks. It had become a ritual — ever since your first year boyfriend dumped you after two weeks — to cry as much as you wanted and drink as much soju as your bodies could handle before stumbling back to your apartments.
Having spent years suffering from an unrequited crush on his best friend, Sunghoon was always the one to comfort you. But that night was different; you were there to comfort him. It was easy enough to play the part of ‘boy whose crush likes someone else’ because he spent your entire friendship in that role. He’d had no problem accepting his fate, but his composure started to slip when you met Yeonjun. It was the first time you’d dated someone who Sunghoon had reason to be jealous of. In every way, Yeonjun was better than him—taller, funnier, hotter. Sunghoon knew he didn’t stand a chance. He took it personally, you liking Yeonjun instead of him, and let his jealousy consume him from the inside out.
This jealousy led him to start telling you about Minjeong—lying to you about Minjeong, and his feelings for her. She was a girl from a college out of town that he saw on his Instagram Explore page. He followed her by accident, and by some stroke of luck, she followed back. Sunghoon didn’t really have feelings for her — he didn’t even know her — but she was a girl that you didn’t know, so you wouldn’t be able to meddle.
It only took a few weeks for Sunghoon to become so upset about your relationship that he couldn’t hide his emotions anymore. So, in a fit of tears, he told you over the phone that things ended badly with Minjeong, and he was in urgent need of a soju ceremony.
But the night was missing its usual comforts.
It was strange to be the one crying, to see you looking put together and ordering the food. To see you pouring the drinks and raising your glass to propose a toast to ‘Hoonie’s first heartbreak’. You were driving that night, so you only had a tiny sip of soju and let him drink as much as he needed, the way he always did for you, at the same table, in the same restaurant for years.
Hours later, in your car, you entertained his drunken rambles, though he remembers how your lips were set into a frown that he wanted to kiss away while you gripped the steering wheel like you thought it would run from you. Sunghoon was more drunk than he’d been in a while, drunk enough to let you sling his arm over your shoulders and keep him upright until you reached his flat.
The voices coming from Yeji’s room disrupt the memory. He’s thankful.
“Your brother’s going through something, so be nice to him this weekend.” His mother’s voice is her version of hushed—a loud whisper.
Yeji’s response is harder to make out, but he doesn’t miss the way their mum says, “I mean it, missy.”
A dramatic sigh rumbles through Yeji as she barges into his room without knocking. Sunghoon sits up, feeling an ache in his back and crossing his legs.
“Mum told me to lay off you today, which is fine, but before I do, I need to tell you something.”
Yeji pushes the door shut behind her, and the open window makes it slam, both of them flinching from the sudden noise. She pulls her hair out of a silk scrunchie and throws herself on the floor. A pang of irritation forms in his chest, knowing that he could immediately find the empty hanger in his wardrobe where the shirt she’s wearing used to live.
“I hate you and your perfect golden boy image, Hoon. Would it kill you to fail a class for once? I don’t know how I’m supposed to carry on your legacy.” She’s looking up at him, her chin in her hands and irritation written in the crease between her thick brows.
It’s impossible to know if it’s because of Yeji’s complete lack of boundaries or the fact that her ‘perfect, golden boy’ big brother is on track to fail three out of three classes and get cut from the hockey team, but Sunghoon immediately bursts into tears.
“Oh, uh.. I’m sorry?” Yeji offers. “I was kidding if that helps.”
“I’m alright, it’s okay.” The tears don’t stop stinging his eyes. “Why do you want me to change everything about myself?”
With a frown, Yeji pours out her frustration and mild resentment. She doesn’t understand how Sunghoon effortlessly conquers every aspect of life while she struggles. Neither do their parents, who had been baffled by her plummeting grades since she moved to boarding school, especially when Sunghoon’s academic performance has only soared since he left for university. The weight of this perceived injustice pulls Sunghoon’s shoulders down with guilt as she talks about the expectations he has inadvertently set for her.
“But other than that, I’m good.” She shrugs, sitting with her legs out, and leaning back on her palms. “How’s YN?” she asks. It’s clear from the brightness in her voice that she thinks she’s helping.
Sunghoon cries again.
Back on campus, he’s trying to scrape together what’s left of his academic career with the help of two of the smartest guys he knows, and their friend Jay. Though the word ‘friend’ feels a little strong at the moment given the way Jay’s goading him.
Sunghoon rolls his eyes, sitting back in his seat. “There’s nothing you can do that I can’t,” he says, meaning every word.
Jay scoffs, shrugging and raising his brow in a way that, over the years, Sunghoon knows to interpret as his ‘about to say something ridiculous’ look. “Pretty sure I could call YN right now, and she’d answer.”
There’s a pit in Sunghoon’s stomach as Heeseung turns his head in the other direction like he’s been slapped, trembling with stifled laughter. At least Jake doesn’t hide his amusement, throwing his head back in a fit of giggles that draw nasty looks from the other students in the library. Sunghoon doesn’t waste his energy trying to argue because Jay’s right.
Now composed, Heeseung turns back to the table, flipping through some of Sunghoon’s course materials to find whatever his class was doing in class that week. The English Literature class he’s taking — The Modernist Movement: Joyce, Woolf, and Hemingway — is the same class he had to send a million emails over the summer to get enrolled in, but it’s the same one Heeseung aced two years ago. Lucky for him none of the boys seem to be in the mood to make fun of him for trying so hard to have a class in common with you, and then practically failing out of it before the term had started properly.
“This class is, like, beyond easy, dude.” Heeseung pauses to sniffle and twist the stud in his ear. “Everyone in my class aced it. How are you doing so badly already?”
“I only took it because YN thought it’d be fun if we had a class together, but.. I kind of haven’t been going since we stopped talking.” Sunghoon shrugs, pretending to be unaffected.
As if the mere mention of your name has some sort of summoning power, like saying Biggie Smalls in the mirror three times, you appear in his eye line, rounding the corner with a furious stride. Your demeanour crumbles when Jay waves at you, and you grin, waving back, but as soon as you look Sunghoon in the eye again, the rage comes back, and you smack a hand on the table when you reach it, leaning over to him.
“Sunghoon, a word?” you ask.
He thinks you’re asking, but it’s hard to tell with the way you set your jaw afterwards, and the way the warmth of your signature vanilla scent hits him hard. Dazed, Sunghoon lifts a hand, pointing at himself. “Me?”
“Does anyone else at the table answer to Sunghoon?”
“Okay,” he says, somewhat pathetically, nudging Jay for laughing at him.
As slowly as possible, Sunghoon pushes his chair from the table and stands up, following you to the corner of the references section where only anthropology students in scratchy thrift store knits, and Jay, come to check out encyclopaedias by volume. You look good, save for the rage written all over your face—which, honestly, Sunghoon thinks he likes.
Sunghoon isn’t sure what to expect, so he says, “Hey.” He’s being cautious, waiting a moment to gauge your reaction. “What’s gooooood?” His cheeks burn as soon as he closes his mouth around the vowel, but you laugh. You laugh, and it’s beautiful and happy, and you’re laughing because of him—or at him, but he’s glad either way.
Annoyance quickly clears all traces of amusement on your face. “Were you ever going to tell me we’re spending next week at Mum and Dad’s?” you ask.
Sunghoon gasps dramatically, clicking his fingers. “I knew there was something I’ve been meaning to do.”
His attempt at lightening the mood falls flat, and you only nudge his shoulder gently, sighing. “Can you be serious? For once in your life, even for a second, can you please think about how the things you say affect me?” You’re frowning, crossing your arms over your chest and looking at your feet. “It’s not fair, Sunghoon. For you to keep saying things—making plans involving me and then acting like I’m the bad guy when I turn you down.”
“I don’t think you’re the bad guy at all,” Sunghoon admits. “If anyone is in the wrong, it’s me, I guess.”
You scoff, looking at him like you hate him. “You guess? Are you serious?” You look furious, but you sound hurt and Sunghoon hates it. Hates himself. “I can’t have this conversation with you right now. Tell mum I’m sick, and it’s contagious.” You roll your eyes and walk away, leaving Sunghoon alone with his thoughts and judgemental stares from students in crochet scarves so long they graze the floor.
He sighs, slumping against the wall. How does he keep getting it wrong with you?
Back at the table, Sunghoon manages to act like he’s not falling apart and makes some serious headway on his missing assignments with Heeseung’s help before they call it a day as the sun starts to set.
When he gets home, he lies down on his bedroom floor, spending hours poring over the conversation you had. Over the minute changes in your facial expression, the tone of your voice, and the endless list of things he should have done, rather than watch you walk away.
The moment feels familiar, both identical to and worlds apart from what happened after you left three months ago. When he managed to scrape the last shreds of his dignity from the kitchen table, he dragged his feet to his room and lay down like he is now, face to the rug. That day, he left his door open and lay so still that Jake thought he was dead. Sunghoon remembers wishing he had been.
For once in your life, even for a second, can you please think about how the things you say affect me? The words run on a loop in his mind, over and over, until he can’t remember the order of the sentence or where you put emphasis. They’re cutting all the same.
Sunghoon sighs into the itchy fibres of his black rug before rolling onto his back. In the diminishing purple light of the setting sun. he looks at the walls of his room. At the Fleetwood Mac poster, he stole from Jay when they moved out of their first year dorm, that curls away from the wall towards the ceiling—a diagonal strip of shiny tape being the only indication of the otherwise invisible tear through the face of Stevie Nicks.
He’s glad when his phone rings, cutting through the quiet, though the sight of your name and the anatomical heart emoji next to it only dampens his spirit. Reluctantly, Sunghoon answers the phone, holding it to his ear.
“I just got off the phone with Dad..” You trail off. Tangible silence follows, so thick it weighs on his chest. “I’ll go home with you.”
“You will?”
“Yes. Goodbye.”
Sunghoon reaches your flat at five in the evening. You don’t smile when you open the door for him, nor do you invite him in. Instead, you dump your bag at your feet and he cringes, looking from the floor to you. You’re aggressively beautiful and cosy-looking as you pull a jacket over the sweater you wore that night. Sunghoon’s heart aches in his chest and he wonders if you even realise. Suddenly, the memory of the last thing you said the morning after hits him like a truck: Then let’s not be friends at all.
A familiar weight lands on his shoulder—your hand. Concern lines your eyes as you ask if he’s okay.
With a lump in his throat, Sunghoon nods.
In the discomfort of his car, the two of you sit in silence while he starts the drive home.
“How’s Yeonjun,” he asks, eyes flicking towards you but regretting it immediately when he sees how you clench your jaw.
“No,” you say simply, shaking your head. “You don’t get to ask me about him.”
These are the only words you exchange until Sunghoon stops for petrol. He has enough fuel for the rest of the journey, but he feels like dying and thinks the fresh air might quell his thoughts of running his car off the road. Like always, the two of you get out and head into the kiosk, where he follows you wordlessly through the aisles, watching you debate on snack choices before settling on the same things you always get. Sunghoon pays for your snacks and you roll your eyes but don’t protest, mumbling thanks as you take them into your arms, leading the way back outside.
He knows he needs to tell you before you reach the house, but he’s not entirely sure how to say it—so he just does. “My, uh.. my parents think we’re dating.”
You stop so suddenly in front of him that he almost bumps into you. Stepping around you, Sunghoon keeps walking.
Over the top of his car, he watches your face cycle through all five stages of grief until anger comes back around in the loop as you scoff. “Why do they think that?” Your face is devoid of expression now, the blankness over your features dragging a sharp chill over his spine.
He stares blankly at you, processing. “Because I told them we’re dating,” he mumbles.
“Why did you.. do that?” You tilt your head, eyes pressing shut in a long blink. “What are you even talking about? Why did you.. What?”
A thin layer of sweat coats his palms despite the cold. Why did he do that? “We can stage a breakup during the trip or say we broke up right now,” Sunghoon offers. “Just one night, YN, please.”
The wind whistles by, ruffling your hair and jacket that you hug tightly to your chest. Behind you, Sunghoon takes note of the group of girls standing by the pumps, all five of them jerking their heads abruptly when they notice him watching, suddenly finding interest in the scattered litter and flickering halogen bulbs in the steel canopy over their heads.
You’re staring when he looks back at you, nostrils twitching with a sniffle before you sigh. “Or we could say that you’re a liar and end things there,” you say. “Or better yet, you go down there on your own and tell them the truth.”
Sunghoon’s gaze drops, his thoughts racing in his mind. He knows you’re right. At some point, his parents will have to find out, and it’d be better for them to find out now. Sunghoon sighs, nodding. “Alright,” he concedes. “I’ll take you back.”
An angry laugh comes out of you as you shake your head. “No need, I’ll walk.”
The station you’re at is neatly nestled in the middle of nowhere, on a road so narrow he’s not even sure it has a pavement. You’re halfway through the three-hour drive, so there’s no telling how long the walk would be, never mind the fact that the sun is already setting and it’s deep enough into October for the wind to sting.
“From here?” he asks, incredulous.
“Yes, open the boot so I can get my bag.”
Sunghoon can only bring himself to say your name, a desperate whisper.
“Open the boot.”
He repeats your name as if it’ll make a difference, he’s pleading with you, begging—though he doesn’t know for what.
You go to the back of his car where Sunghoon joins you, a pit in his stomach when you step away. With misty eyes, you look up at him and his heart breaks. “Please.”
Sunghoon knows you well enough to know that you’re not actually going to attempt the walk home but also knows that you won’t back down if he keeps challenging you. He nods, opening the boot for you and getting into the driver’s seat—your move.
You stand there, unmoving, and long enough passes that he thinks you’ll actually leave. The boot closes softly and you join him in the passenger seat. You sigh, buckling your seatbelt. “Let’s just get this over with.”
For the rest of the journey, you sit in silence as Sunghoon briefs you on the relationship, fighting a smile as he thinks about being your boyfriend—even if only for a night. You scoff when he ‘reminds’ you that you’ve been together for four months now and the only reason you haven’t been able to come home recently is that your schedules don’t match up very well anymore—which couldn’t be further from the truth as, before term started, you went out to celebrate the fact that your class schedules couldn’t be more suited for seeing each other.
Finally, at Sunghoon’s childhood home, the two of you smile and laugh for his parents before going to bed. Your relationship has only made his mother more averse to the idea of you sharing a room under her roof than she had been when you were younger. He’s relieved about this, and in the solitude of his bedroom, he lies on the duvet of his twin bed, staring up at the ceiling and thinking about the last few hours.
With his parents, you’d sat up in the living room watching TV. They sat on the couch together, his mum nestled in his dad’s side, while you two sat on the couch opposite, mirroring their position. If your complete stiffness was anything to go by, you were less than comfortable with his arm around you and Sunghoon felt terrible for begging you to go along with this. It was after midnight when you all went upstairs and you let him kiss your forehead before all but slamming the door to the guest room in his face. His heart twirled and his mum beamed at him before saying goodnight again.
Now, at 3 a.m. he can’t sleep. Flinching at the knock on his door, he furrows his brows and goes to open it. It’s you. Standing there with your hair scraped away from your face in one of his t-shirts. Your eyes are red, brimmed with tears as you step into his room and sit on his bed.
He closes the door softly, heart aching at the sight of you so upset, and when he sits next to you, his heart tears apart because you move over, putting a distance between you. It falls out of his chest onto the floor when he realises you’re not wearing your necklace.
Sunghoon suspected you might have stopped wearing it, it only made sense that if you didn’t want him, you wouldn’t want the necklace he bought for you either, but at least earlier, your sweatshirt sat so high he couldn’t see if you had it on or not.
It was a gift for your sixteenth birthday, after your first heartbreak. He was so upset and angry that you let some loser hurt you that way, upset and angry that someone could be loved by you and fuck it up. Sunghoon was inspired by Jay, who’d gotten a pretty necklace for his girlfriend, and talked about her cute reaction for weeks, how happy she was to have a piece of him with her all the time. It was a locket, with a picture of Jay in one side and a picture of her in the other so the pictures would kiss when she wore it.
While at the jewellers with Jake, Sunghoon thought something like that might be a bit much for the two of you and eventually picked out an equally pretty piece with his first initial on it. He wrote a corny note to put in the box, something about how ‘boys come and go but Sunghoon is forever’ and gave it to you with trembling hands a few nights later—it was the first time he ever made you cry. Immediately, he thought he’d done something wrong and was ready to snatch the box and run back to the jewellers (even though he trashed the receipt). You hugged him and told him you loved him. Sunghoon’s been riding that high ever since.
Until tonight at least.
“Are you okay?” he whispers.
“I’ll do it, Hoon.” Your eyes lift from the floor to meet his gaze. “For as long as you need me to, I’ll pretend.”
As soon as the words leave your mouth, Sunghoon feels lighter, an unbearable weight slipping from his shoulders. You haven’t called him ‘Hoon’ in ages, and he can’t tell if you’ve said it out of vulnerability, or even noticed that you’ve said it at all, but it warms his heart nonetheless. However, he’s not fully at ease, still curious about your sudden change of heart and why you’re crying.
“What happened?”
You pull him into a hug, and his eyes bulge out of his head. “It doesn’t matter,” you say, the words muffled by the skin at the base of his neck.
For as long as he’s known you, you’ve smelled like vanilla, a sweet warmth that grounds him. Yet it’s only after these months apart that he’s able to put a name to the sensation: home. The realisation of how much he’s missed this feeling, missed you, floods him with a rush of emotion so overwhelming he can’t find the words to press the issue. A moment passes before he remembers to hug you back, his arms finally wrapping around you, pulling you close, and you sink into his hold. Months ago, he would have kissed the top of your head and mumbled reassurance into your hair, but tonight, Sunghoon settles for stroking the back of your head and hopes it’s enough.
“You can talk to me, you know? You can always talk to me.”
A heavy silence follows, sharp as a dagger—scraping his skin, making the hair on the back of his neck stand on edge and lodging itself between his shoulder blades. Sunghoon’s breath hitches in his throat when you cling onto him even tighter, shifting so close you’ve had to settle in his lap. His heart races in his chest, pounding a rhythm so loud it fills the room.
Finally, you speak, assuring him that you know and that you’re okay. At this, Sunghoon holds you as tight as he can, and neither of you speaks for the rest of the night. You fall asleep like this, in his arms, so deeply that you don’t even stir when he lies down.
Rubbing your back, he watches the clock on his nightstand, the piercing green LED digits cycling through two whole hours right before his stinging eyes until you wake up. Sunghoon presses his eyes shut, pretending to be asleep when you kiss his cheek and leave his room.
For the entire morning, you stay in your room, and although Sunghoon is concerned, he decides not to bother you. In the afternoon, he sits at the dining table with his mum, listening as she talks about work. When she asks him, he gets up to make a cup of tea for her. It’s at that moment when you finally come downstairs, looking so effortlessly pretty. Your hair is still damp from the shower, and you’re bundled up in one of his old sweatshirts. There’s a bright grin on your face that leaves his heart thudding.
“Baby!” you squeal when you see him, charging towards him and wrapping your arms around him from behind. “Good morning.” Your words are muffled against the back of his t-shirt, and the four-letter word, and the sugar coating it, make his cheeks burn.
“It’s great to see you too, YN,” his mum says with a smile. “My night was amazing; I slept very well and had no dreams.”
You let go of Sunghoon and walk over to the table, kissing his mum on the cheek and wishing her a good morning as well. “Sorry, mum, how are you?”
His mother doesn’t seem to have the heart to correct you either, allowing your 3 p.m. ‘good morning’ to go unnoticed.
Sunghoon carefully fills both mugs to the brim and, with extra caution, carries them to the table. He places a steaming cup of peppermint tea in front of his mum and a milky coffee in front of you. A warm smile spreads across your face as you mouth a ‘thank you’, and his knees turn to jelly.
The next day, after eating an early dinner with his parents at the table, the four of you go out on a walk along the bike path you used to take for school. His parents have gone ahead, not intentionally, but because Sunghoon can’t stop you from dragging your feet.
As with most things in the town where you grew up, nothing about the trail has changed. The leaves are yellowing in standard form for the season, and crunching under his feet with each step he takes. The only foreign experience is the silence that you’re determined to uphold. Everything Sunghoon says to you is met with either a hum, a nod, or no acknowledgement at all. At this point, he feels like he could drop dead at your side and the most you’d do is step over his body like a fallen branch.
After letting you go ahead, the weathered slats of the wooden footbridge sag in the middle under his tread. It’s been like this for as long as he can remember and he wonders how nothing has been done about it. The stream rushes under it, loud and unruly, the smell of wet grass both comforting and suffocating as you look over the railing. It’s like something from a postcard, the low-hanging branches sweeping back and forth under the breeze, the grass lush and green around the path, murky water thrashing against the mud and rocks underneath with you in the middle of the frame, peering over the edge.
You keep walking when Sunghoon approaches, leaving him alone on the creaky bridge with nothing but the ache in his chest. He looks up, staring at the grey clouds in the sky through the gaps in the leaves, and sighs.
Eventually, he catches up with you, grabbing your hand and locking his fingers with yours when his parents slow down. You stiffen, looking up at him with cut eyes and a creased brow. “What are you doing?”
Sunghoon matches your clipped tone. “Holding my girlfriend’s hand.”
“No one’s looking, boyfriend.”
“You think my parents aren’t going to wonder why we’re lagging behind?”
A scoff—your fingers remain defiantly stiff. “Do you think your parents are going to care whether or not we’re holding hands?”
“My mum might after the show you put on yesterday afternoon, baby.” Bitterness covers the word like a blanket, a stark departure from how you said it.
A long sigh rumbles its way out of you before you fix your lips into a strained grin. “Sorry, sweetheart, this is my first time pretending to be in love.”
As your words hang in the air, Sunghoon’s emotions brew like a storm within him. Frustration gnaws at his patience. All hopes for a smooth week are dashed, though determination simmers in his chest with a strong resolve to make this work, to fix your relationship. It doesn’t stop the sharp pang of hurt piercing his stomach—he knows you don’t feel the same way, he knows you’re faking, but the word ‘pretending’ hits him like a truck anyway.
“We held hands all the time when we were friends,” he points out.
Your smile drops immediately, hurt flashing behind your eyes. “Yeah, and now we’re not.”
If there was a competition for who could hurt Sunghoon’s feelings the most, you’d be a shoo-in for first place. With distinction.
“Exactly!” he says, feeling the sting of his own words. “Because now we’re dating.”
At the sight of his mum turning around, you switch up in an instant. Lock your fingers with his, wrapping an arm around his bicep, leaning into him, giggling. It’s forced but his parents are far enough away that all that matters is the curve of your lips.
“You two okay back there?” she asks.
“Perfect! I feel like a kid again!” you call back, beaming up at Sunghoon in a way that makes his stomach flutter even though it doesn’t meet your eyes.
The two of you don’t talk at all when you get home, with you hugging his parents goodnight and running up the stairs.
“She’s not feeling too well,” he explains, nodding when his dad tells him to make you some tea.
His parents spend the whole day at work, and you spend the whole day following him around like a shadow until the evening when they return. He doesn’t pretend not to like it.
Sunghoon helps you make dinner, turning leftover rice into fried rice with the help of some eggs and vegetables. It’s nice moving around the kitchen with you, watching you scramble eggs in his t-shirt and bump his hip with a playful frown when he eats some of the peppers you’re chopping.
His parents watch from the table, cooing over the two of you and he does his best to fight the blush forming on his cheeks and neck. Embarrassed, he hugs you from behind, hiding his face in your neck—the scent of your coconut conditioner mixing with your vanilla perfume doesn’t do anything to stop the flush.
Over a bottle of wine, the four of you eat together at the table, swapping stories about your days. Sunghoon tries to hide his surprise as you lie about the time you spent at the play park by your primary school, competing for height on the swings and spinning on the roundabout until you couldn’t stand up. You grin at him, and it meets your eyes as you hold his hand under the table, and kiss his cheek.
After eating, his parents head upstairs, leaving to clean up together. You hum a song he’s never heard as you load the dishwasher, carefully placing the plates and cutlery in the rack, shaking your head when he hands you the glasses you’d used.
“Leave ours,” you say. “If you want.”
Sunghoon nods, putting them back on the table, where you sit in the seat across from the one he was sitting in. He sits too, staying quiet rather than saying the wrong thing. You don’t speak either. It’s reminiscent of the past—the hours you’d spend in the same room, only speaking to share a funny post you’d come across or to ask if you were hungry.
His eyes track your movements—reaching for the half-empty bottle on the table to pour yourself another glass, filling it to the brim. Before putting it down, you offer him some, filling his glass too when he nods. The three glasses of wine he’s already had must be the reason he wants to reach across the table and hold your hand, run his thumb over the soft skin on the back of it.
Sunghoon doesn’t know why you’ve been so nice to him all day or why it makes his chest hurt.
“You know you don’t have to be nice to me when we’re alone, right?” The words come out before he can stop them.
Over the top of your glass, your brows knit together. A sound of confusion, a low hum, comes from your throat as you try to finish your sip. “What?” you ask finally.
“I only asked you to do this because of my parents, you know? You don’t have to sit or talk with me when they’re not around.”
Sunghoon’s known you long enough to recognise the look that flashes across your face. The way your eyes narrow and your brows tug together, the little pout that sets on your lips before you speak; you’re hurt.
“Why can’t I just be nice to you because it’s the right thing to do?”
Because it hurts, is what he wants to say. He wants to cry, to beg you to forget everything he said that day. “Because I don’t want to make you any more uncomfortable than I already have.” Is what he settles for.
Your face softens. “I don’t feel uncomfortable around you, Hoon. We were best friends for ages, I don’t think you could ever make me uncomfortable.” You pause to take a gulp of wine. “Why can’t I just want to be nice to you?”
Sunghoon has to chew on his cheek to distract himself from how much your word choice stings. The implications of were and all of your past tense. “I’m sorry,” he says.
“What for?”
“Everything.”
There’s a sadness in the way you run your fingers on the base of your glass. The way you chew on your lip, how your hair falls when you tilt your head and how it moves when you shake it. “It’s not your fault,” you say. “I don’t know anyone who would choose to have unrequited feelings for their best friend.”
Wow, he thinks. You’re on a roll. Sunghoon wonders if you’re meticulously choosing your phrasing to upset him. Wonders why you feel the need to remind him that his feelings aren’t reciprocated as if he didn’t live through and spend hours reliving the day he confessed.
“But I didn’t have to tell you about it. It was unfair of me to spring that on you when I knew about Yeonjun.”
“Did you.. did you think I was going to leave him for you?”
“Maybe?” Sunghoon chews on his lip—he has no idea what he thought would happen. “I think I thought I loved you enough for both of us, that you might play the part for fun or out of curiosity, and.. I don’t know, just learn to love me.”
“Hoon,” you whisper, frowning. “How could you even think about settling for something like that?”
Sunghoon shrugs. “It’s not settling if it’s you.”
Silence takes a seat at the table after he speaks, interrupted only by the ticking clock on the wall—a glittery mess of scrapbooking paper and washi tape layered over each other that Yeji had decorated at summer camp years ago. You’re picking at your fingernails, letting flecks of black polish fall to the table, stark against the varnished oak.
“I know it’s not my place to ask,” Sunghoon starts after a while, hesitant and only continuing when you nod. “But what did Yeonjun say when you told him? About.. everything?”
You take a long sip from your glass and sit quietly for so long that he thinks you’re not going to answer him—he doesn’t blame you.
“I didn’t.”
He waits for you to elaborate. You don’t.
Sunghoon nods slowly, deciding not to ask any follow-up questions. Instead, he takes another drink, scrunching his nose at the bitter taste. “He didn’t ask why we stopped hanging out?” he blurts out.
“I told him we fell out but I didn’t say why.” You shrug, but your posture is stiff.
“Where did you tell him you were going to be this week?” He knows it’s not his business at all, that he’s pushing your boundaries, but he can’t help his curiosity.
“Nowhere.”
“You told him you were staying on campus?”
“I didn’t tell him anything.” Your gaze shifts, avoiding his as you toy with the stem of your glass. You drum your nails against it, letting the dull clink ring out.
“So you just left?”
“Does it make a difference to you?”
Sunghoon nods.
For a while, you tug at the drawstrings on your hoodie, pursing your lips to the side, considering this. “Yeonjun and I aren’t together anymore.” Your admission is so shocking that Sunghoon’s jaw drops. He tries to cover his surprise by coughing, his tongue sticking out like a small child. “I didn’t want to say anything because I didn’t want you to think it was because of you.”
Sunghoon’s thoughts move at lightspeed, too fast for him to catch onto any of them and process this information. His emotions compete with each other—disbelief, guilt, and a painful glimmer of hope he hadn’t dared to acknowledge until now all at the forefront.
“Was it?” he asks. “Because of me?”
You scoff—an incredulous sound that doesn’t match the sad look on your face. “I don’t know, Sunghoon. Do you think my boyfriend used me to make his ex jealous because of you?”
He’s not sure what he expected you to say, but this is.. Complete disbelief eclipses him as his heart sinks in his chest, shock, and guilt bubbling in his stomach.
“I’m sorry,” he says after too long. “That I wasn’t there. That I haven’t been there.”
“You didn’t know,” you say, gaze softening as you look up at him.
“But I made you feel like you couldn’t talk to me about it.”
You shake your head. “I made me feel like I couldn’t talk to you about it. All you did was change the friendship, I’m the one who ended it.”
“I still should’ve been there.”
“You’re here now, right?”
Sunghoon nods, earnestly. “Always.”
Only one thing comes to mind when you repeat the word ‘always’ before taking a sip from your glass, downing its contents. Sunghoon gets up and crosses the room with wobbly steps to open the fridge, where he pulls out as many bottles of soju as he can hold in his hands and puts them down on the table. He goes back to collect some glasses from the cabinet, puts some of the leftover fried rice from dinner into the microwave, and brings it all over when it’s done, with bowls and utensils. You watch him with a fond smile as he opens a bottle and he hopes you think the flush on his cheeks is from all the drinking you’ve been doing.
“Is it bad that I’ve missed doing this?” You’re grinning now.
Sunghoon shakes his head, raising his glass. “To YN’s fifteenth heartbreak.”
You grin, clinking the rim of your glass against his. “To YN’s fifteenth heartbreak,” you repeat.
Both of you down the glasses, and Sunghoon refills them, pouring the soju with an oddly steady hand. As you eat spoonfuls of rice and sip your drinks, silence settles over the room. The soft glow of the kitchen lights forms a warm ambience, a cosy familiarity that brings up simple memories—doing homework together at the table while gossiping about your classmates, the first New Year after you were both eighteen and had your first drink with his parents.
For at least an hour, the only sounds are the occasional clinks of forks against bowls, glasses hitting the table, the faint hum of the refrigerator and the steady tick of Yeji’s clock. Sunghoon’s eyes meet yours, and he can’t help but notice the slight change in your expression when they do.
You clear your throat, running a hand through your hair. “This is my sixteenth, actually.”
“What?”
You take a small sip of soju, staring down at the table. “My fifteenth heartbreak was losing you. Yeonjun is my sixteenth.”
In the two days since your soju ceremony, Sunghoon finds himself sinking into the role of your boyfriend like a hot bath. But there’s no use pretending it doesn’t hurt. Pretending it doesn’t hurt when you kiss his cheek before bed, or when you reach out to push the hair out of his face or snuggle into his side on the couch; because it does hurt—a lot. It hurts to think that in three days when you put your bags in the boot of his car, you’ll sit in silence all the way home. When he drops you off at your flat, you’ll close the door in his face and stop talking to him again. These realisations are harder to confront when he’s alone in his room, like now.
About an hour ago, you asked if you could borrow his car, saying there was something you needed to do on your own. It seemed important, so he handed over his keys with no question. Sighing, Sunghoon gets up from his bed and heads to the shower, where he jerks off to clear his mind. On his way back to his room, he notices the light leaking from the open kitchen door that illuminates the landing.
He hears the lock on the front door clicking, and stands at the top of the stairs, dripping water onto the carpet while listening attentively. His ears perk up when he hears a gasp—his mother.
“What’s this for?” she asks.
“I just..” You trail off. “I know it’s not much, but I wanted to thank you both for always looking after me.” You pause, and Sunghoon holds his breath, waiting. Your voice trembles as you continue. “It’s been hard since my parents went back home, and I guess it was still hard when they were here, but you both supported me. I don’t think I could’ve managed without you guys. I want to make you guys proud, you know? And I’m trying, really, so this is me saying thank you. I’m sorry it took me so long.”
He grips the railing by the landing, digging his nails into the wood until they start hurting—an ache in his fingertips that makes him wince.
An odd feeling settles in his stomach, a bittersweetness tinged in his fondness for you, and the gentle shock of realising how much his parents have done for you. Growing up, you became an honorary member of Sunghoon’s family. His parents showered you with gifts during holidays and birthdays, which you often celebrated with them rather than your own family.
The memory of your parents’ sudden decision to move across the country still lingers, and Sunghoon vividly recalls the tearful conversation he overheard at the top of the stairs. Your parents understood the enormity of their request but had earnestly asked if Sunghoon’s parents could continue looking after you.
His chest tightens when you start crying.
“You don’t have to thank us for anything, sweetie. Just you being here and taking care of our boy is more than enough thanks. You never forget our birthdays, and you always come and visit when you can. You’re doing a great job, and you should give yourself some credit,” his dad says, a little choked up. “We’ve always been proud of you.”
Sunghoon’s eyes sting with tears and his skin gets dry in the spots where the water from the shower is evaporating. He presses his fingers to his closed eyes, forcing a few tears to fall and walks the rest of the way to his room with his eyes shut. He can’t hear anything through his closed bedroom door, which he decides is a good thing as he coats himself in moisturiser and swipes deodorant under his arms with intention to spend the whole night alone. Once he’s dressed, he gets into bed and pretends not to be bothered by the way his wet hair dampens his pillow. Under the duvet, he tosses and turns before sighing and heading to Yeji’s room.
In her absence, the room’s subtle transformation is stark. The sage green-painted walls, once a backdrop to the A3 faces of Wave to Earth and Beabadoobee, now bear the faint imprints of those missing posters. Tiny, shadowy rectangles are the only remnants of the 6x4-sized pictures of her and her friends, of her and Sunghoon, that she took away with her to school.
Her hairdryer is still on her desk where she’d left it for him to use and he sits in her stiff wooden chair, plugging it in. The airflow starts immediately, hot and loud, humming throughout the space as he runs his fingers through his wet hair, feeling cosy under the heat. His shampoo is fresh and soapy scented under his nose, and his reflection watches him in Yeji’s mirror, eyes red and concerned while his hair blows around his head. Sunghoon closes his eyes and finishes his hair, sighing as he lets his worries slip under the whir of the fan.
Finished, he shuts off the dryer and opens his eyes, flinching at your reflection in the doorway behind him with a soft smile on your face. “Mum and Dad are going to open a bottle of wine if you want to join,” you say, meeting his eyes in the mirror.
Sunghoon can’t find it in himself to speak, only nodding in response. You smile wider but don’t move. He unplugs the hairdryer and leaves it on the desk where he found it before crossing the room. Without giving himself a chance to think about it, he pulls you into a hug and kisses the top of your head, smiling into your hair when you wrap your arms around his waist, holding him closer.
You’re sitting on the edge of the bathtub, mumbling sleepily that you’re never going to drink again, and Sunghoon leans over the sink brushing his teeth, he’s glad you have the decency to cover your mouth as you speak.
“Brush your teeth and go back to sleep then,” he mumbles around his toothbrush.
You don’t respond.
Sunghoon sighs through his nose, spitting foamy toothpaste into the sink, leaving bubbly, blue splatters on the porcelain. “And quit staring at me, I can feel your beady little eyes on the back of my neck and it’s freaking me out.”
“But you’re so pretty,” you coo.
There’s a flutter in his stomach and he rinses off the sink and his mouth, buying himself some time. With a hand on the Listerine, he lifts his gaze to meet yours in the mirror and stops short. You’re still staring at him, features soft and glowing under the afternoon light. You look like an angel; a gentle smile spreading over your lips, and a sleepy glint sparkling in your eyes, wide and gorgeous as you watch him. Sunghoon gulps, mumbling his thanks and looking back at himself. He hopes you can’t see the flush on his cheeks.
“Go back to sleep,” he says.
“Will you come and lie down with me if I do?” Your voice is a sleepy drawl, coming out in a slow, high-pitched slur, and your eyes are closing on themselves.
Lying down doesn’t sound like a terrible idea, especially not if it’s with you, so he nods. “If you brush your teeth, then yeah, baby, I’ll lie down with you.”
You chuckle softly at Sunghoon’s agreement, the sound carrying a mix of exhaustion and genuine amusement, showing no repulsion to him calling you the B-word. He didn’t mean to, it’s been a confusing few days. You nod, saluting to him and getting up to join him by the sink, using your hip to bump him out of the way, but he feels like he’s glued to the spot.
“Move, baby,” you mumble sleepily, reaching for your toothbrush. “We can cuddle in my bed,” you suggest, to which Sunghoon only nods, taking your words as a cue to unstick his feet from the floor and go to your room, playing the word ‘baby’ on a loop in his head.
He stands in the doorway staring at your bed, the duvet is all crumpled in the middle, and the pillows are in an L shape at the top corner. He sighs, he can’t go on like this, can’t stand around hoping even a tiny part of you called him ‘baby’ and it meant something for you as it did for him. It’s not fair for him to project his feelings on you like this, but he can’t help it. You’re already pretending for his parents, so would it be so bad to pretend for his sake as well? Even if only until the day after tomorrow when you leave?
The sound of the bathroom door shutting behind you snaps him out of his thoughts, your bright smile making his heart race when you tug him by the sleeve to your bed where the mattress dips underneath you as you curl into his form, resting your head on his chest and falling asleep. You’ve shared the bed before, countless times, but he knows you’ve only asked him because you’re tired. Because your brain is foggy with drowsiness that clouds your judgement, not because you want him there, not because you miss him when he’s two doors down the hall, tossing and turning at night thinking about you. He wonders absently if you can feel his aching heart beating through his chest, a painful, yet all too familiar rhythm that pulls his own eyes shut, plunging him into a deep sleep too.
It’s dark in the room when he wakes up, the sun already down behind the curtains and the soft yellow of the bedside lamp casting a glow around the space. You’re staring up at him, smiling and you don’t look away when he catches you. “What is it?” he asks, voice thick with sleep.
“Nothing,” you mumble. “I just missed you.” Sunghoon has no time to respond or even register what you said before you clear your throat, speaking again. “Come on, dad’s cooking tonight, he’ll need help.”
Helping Sunghoon’s dad with dinner always looks an awful lot like Sunghoon eating snacks on the kitchen counter and staring at you as you help his dad cook. Tonight is no exception, he’s sitting on the island, and his snack of choice is a family pack of Chilli Heatwave Doritos his mum bought for Yeji. He’ll have to remember to replace them before leaving seeing as he’s reaching the halfway point.
You go back and forth with his dad about measurements, with you rummaging through the drawers for measuring cups while his dad says it’s best to trust your gut. Reluctantly, you nod, chewing the inside of your cheek as you watch him eyeball the seasoning.
The gas stove turns the kitchen into an oven, and you complain about it while opening a window, pulling your hoodie over your head and leaving it in Sunghoon’s lap. Time stops when you grin at him, the light from the stove hood illuminating the necklace you’re wearing, his initial resting on your chest and glowing under the light. He chokes around a crisp when he sees it, catching your attention with his coughing.
“You’ll spoil your dinner, snacking like that, baby,” you scold, using a hand to push his knee. “We’re almost done, I swear.”
All he can do is nod, cheeks burning as he folds the crisp packet over before putting it back in the bread bin where he found it.
“Wow,” his dad says, resting his hands on his hips and shaking his head in amusement. “Being in love looks good on him, he’d never have listened if I said that.”
It’s already your last day when Sunghoon picks up Yeji from school. She grumbles for the entire half-hour drive and all the way to the front door about why the two of you couldn’t have started the trip today instead of ending it, but all of her irritation dissolves when she sees you in the hallway, leaving the front door wide open to fling her arms around you. You and Yeji exchange compliments for a while — You look so pretty. No, you look so pretty. I love your hair. I love your hair. — as Sunghoon locks the door and watches with a smile.
“God.” Yeji sighs, holding you by the waist and craning her neck up to look at you, as you push some of her hair from her face, pinning back her wispy bangs with the palm of your hand. Yeji giggles. “I’m so happy you two are together, even though I have no idea what a girl like you sees in my loser brother.”
Sunghoon rolls his eyes, leaning back against the wall. Despite his mild irritation at Yeji’s words, he finds the sight of you with her so adorable his stomach flutters. Over the top of Yeji’s head, you look at him with a fond smile. “He’s not so bad.”
It doesn’t sound like a compliment, but Sunghoon takes it to heart.
Like always, Yeji manages to capture your undivided attention and the two of you giggle and whisper with each other all afternoon while Sunghoon watches, too enamoured by the sight to care about being left out. An hour or so passes like this, until his parents get home from work, excited to see Yeji after a few weeks, and you leave her side, coming to cuddle with Sunghoon instead.
It’s nice being home with everyone, laughing and sharing a meal before his family walks the two of you to his car with at least a month’s worth of cooked food for you to share at university. Yeji makes you pinky promise that she can visit you and waves with a pout on her face until the car is out of view.
Contrary to what he’d been expecting, the drive back is nice. Your playlist is on, and you’re telling him about all the new songs you added, catching him up on things with Chaewon and Yunjin, and all the things you got up to in the time you spent apart. You tell him about a new café that opened up near your place and how you’ll have to go together when he has the time, and Sunghoon bites his tongue before telling you that he always has time for you. The first half of the trip goes on like this but you start dozing off around the halfway mark, your sentences becoming few and far between, eventually turning into half-mumbled thoughts that end prematurely.
You’re still asleep when he reaches your flat, head propped up against the window with your soft lips parted, looking too pretty and cosy to wake up. Instead, he drives in circles around your block, deciding to wait for you to wake up on your own. It only takes a half-hour but you blink your eyes open, stretching your neck before looking around and out the car window, recognising the street. You don’t say anything, only smiling when you look at him, a small curve of your lips that makes his heart race.
He gets out of the car with you, opening the boot to get your bag before pulling you into his chest for a hug, liking the way your arms settle around his waist. “Thank you,” he mumbles into your hair.
Sunghoon doesn’t follow you when you take your bag from him, only watching from the back of his car. You don’t notice until you reach the main door, looking over your shoulder and frowning at him. “Aren’t you going to walk me up?”
The two of you walk in silence up four flights of stairs as the lift in your building is out of order. Your bag feels much heavier in his hand now than it did outside. At your door, he watches you dig around for your keys, sighing with relief when you find them.
“Do you want to come in?” you ask from your open doorway.
“I—uh—I have training in the morning and I’m already pretty tired, so..” He trails off.
Unfazed, you nod. “Right, of course. I had fun this week.”
“Yeah, me too.”
You smile at him, sweet and sincere. “Text me when you get home, yeah?”
Sunghoon nods, saying goodbye. Out of habit, he doesn’t leave your doorstep until he hears the lock click shut, and walks back to his car with his head down.
True to his word, he sends you a text to let you know he got back to his place safely and you read it immediately but don’t reply. It’s empty in the apartment, Jake is out with his football team and the space is larger than usual in his absence. Far too tired to even consider going out and joining him, Sunghoon goes through his night routine, putting his phone on the charger and stepping into the shower where he spends entirely too long wishing he could live in this week forever as he scrubs his body. With brushed teeth and damp hair, he goes back into his room where his phone lights up with a notification; a text, from you.
YN🫀: i’m glad you got home okay, i just got into bed :) i don’t want to make you uncomfortable or overstep or anything and you can say no (obviously).. i’ve been missing you so much and didn’t know how to reach out or if you wanted me to but i had soooo much fun this week and spending time with you again made me happy, so i’d like it if we could keep hanging out, like before yk? ik it’s a long shot ahahaha but just say you’ll think about it?
hoonie: You’re not overstepping at all, I’ve missed you too, so bad. I had soooo much fun this week as well and I’d like it a lot if we kept hanging out, thank you for agreeing and coming along 😚 If you’re free after Lit tmrw you could come over? Or we could go out and do something, whatever you prefer
hoonie: I missed you so much..
hoonie: 🤍
The texts greet you as the first rays of Monday morning light filter into your room, instantly lifting your mood. Your bright smile doesn’t escape Chaewon’s notice as you find her in the kitchen, bathed in the soft light seeping through the sheer curtains. The kettle is boiling with a loud rumble that fills the whole room and leaves her yelling as she speaks to you.
“Good trip?” she asks, coming over and hugging you. “Never leave me for that long again,” she mumbles into your shirt.
“It was a week, Wonie,” you say, rolling your eyes even though you missed her too.
She leans away, looking at you with knitted brows. “It was nine days.”
“The longest of my life.”
Chaewon pulls air through her teeth, tilting her head and releasing you. “That bad, huh?” she asks, walking back to her seat at your tiny square table and shooting you a look that tells you to join her.
During your trip, you gave her nightly updates over text, so you know she knows how much you enjoyed yourself, but you elaborate anyway, sitting across from her.
“No, not at all,” you say, shaking your head and trying to fight a smile. “I had fun.” As soon as the words leave your mouth, you have to bite your bottom lip to stop the grin curving them; it doesn’t work.
Chaewon raises a suggestive brow, crossing her arms over her chest. “How much fun?”
“You’re disgusting.”
“I didn’t even say anything!” she defends, holding her hands up. “I made an implication. It was only a matter of time, you two have that whole.. lifelong best friends to lifelong lovers thing going on, and it’s hot.”
“Shut up.”
“You’re telling me, you spent nine days playing lovers with Sunghoon and you still don’t want him? You’re a lost cause, people would kill for that chance,” she says, tilting her head. “I think I would kill for that chance.”
“Don’t touch him.”
“Oh?”
“Jesus, Chaewon, it’s not like that. Hoon’s too sensitive for your roster.”
“I never said it was like anything, you’re the one who’s dangling me over the ledge for saying I want to fuck your hot best friend.”
“Sunghoon isn’t hot; he’s..” You find yourself at a loss for words, unsure how to continue your lie. Of course, Sunghoon is hot, you’ve known since you were seventeen and spent the summer at your grandparents’ house, only to come back to find your previously scrawny best friend having ditched his LEGOs for dumbbells. You sigh. “Just leave him alone.”
Chaewon grins, eyes sparkling as she leaves the table. “Okay,” she says in a singsong voice, leaving you and the irritation in your stomach alone in the kitchen.
You sigh, pressing your eyes shut and trying to will away your discomfort. It’s not like Chaewon would actually try anything with Sunghoon. Right? Even if she did, it wouldn’t bother you, nor would it be any of your business. They’re grownups and reserve the right to explore their options. Still, there’s a nagging feeling you can’t shake, an uninvited guest in the back of your mind.
When you check your phone, you realise you have half an hour before you need to head to campus, so you leave to get ready and text Sunghoon back on the way to your room.
you: sounds good, see u later 🤍
After showering, you stand in front of your wardrobe, towel hanging from your body as you pick an outfit. For some reason, you feel under pressure, picking a pair of jeans that do the most for your ass and a low-cut top that Sunghoon once — drunkenly — said he loved on you.
You have the residual sting of mouthwash on your tongue, and one foot out the door when your phone vibrates in your hand.
hoonie: Do you want to head to class together?
you: sure! i’m omw out, where should i get you?
hoonie: .. I’m outside your building :D
Breathing a laugh through your nose, you don’t fight the giddy smile on your face as you make your way downstairs to meet Sunghoon. Through the glass in the main door, he’s standing at the edge of the pavement and kicking a stone between his feet. The top of his puffer jacket covers the bottom half of his face, and the draught nips your skin when the door opens. Two girls you vaguely recognise stumble in with smudged makeup and heels in their hands, smiling at you while holding the door to let you out.
“Hey!” you call out, jogging over to him.
Sunghoon turns around, his head poking out of his jacket to grin at you, holding a travel cup and an abundance of tinfoil in your direction.
“I wasn’t sure if you’d have eaten anything yet, you don’t normally in the morning,” he says, a sheepish smile spreading over his lips when you take it. “Matcha. Ham and cheese toastie.”
“Did you make these?” you ask, inspecting the familiar cup and appreciating the warmth it provides.
He hums, nodding his head.
You ignore the heat spreading over your cheeks and thank him with a hug, grinning when he offers to hold your drink while you eat on the walk. The toastie is still hot, the cheese coming close to burning your tongue as you chew, but you appreciate it wholeheartedly, humming contently with each bite. When you’re done, you shove the foil into your pocket, taking your drink from him and smiling around the sweet taste of a matcha latte as he tells you about his schedule for the day.
“I’m meeting with Coach after class to talk about my grades, but I’m all yours after that.”
“Talk about your grades? What’s wrong with your grades?”
Sunghoon groans, head falling back and highlighting the bump of his Adam’s apple. “My grades are.. I failed my coursework this month, so I have resubmissions during finals, and I think he’ll bench me if I fail again.”
He sounds like he’s being serious, and if the look on his face is anything to go by, he is. The news creases your brows because for as long as you remember, Sunghoon’s grades were your parents’ favourite point of comparison.
“Really?” you ask. He nods. “What’s up? Is something the matter?”
A humourless laugh slips out of him before he pulls air through his teeth. “Yeah, my best friend didn’t talk to me for three months.”
“Oh..” Guilt stirs your stomach as you look up at him. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m not blaming you, it’s not like I was trying to talk and you ignored me.” He nudges your arm with his elbow, giving you a warm smile. “But if you feel as guilty about it as you look, you can tutor me for Lit.”
“Deal.”
Sunghoon grins, wrapping his arm over your shoulders and holding you close; the action itself isn’t unusual, but the increased heart rate it brings about is. “You’re too good to me,” he says, holding onto you for the rest of the walk to class.
At his request, you sit with Sunghoon in the back row, watching as the lecture hall gradually fills up in front of you. He seems well-prepared, with his laptop and a small notepad and pen neatly arranged on the desk in front of him.
Throughout the class, your eyes inadvertently track his every move. He diligently types up colour-coded notes, occasionally pausing to write things in his notepad before continuing to type or stopping entirely to listen. There’s something melodic about his actions and the way his fingers run over the keyboard.
During a five-minute break, you glance at his screen. What you find is more than just lecture content; it’s a document adorned with Sunghoon’s own musings about Hemingway’s style and carefully analysed quotations that go beyond the class discussion.
“How are your notes so good?”
“I picked up the book over the summer when you mentioned it,” Sunghoon replies with a shrug, a shy smile playing on his lips as he leans back in his seat. “I liked it.”
A slow nod is your response, though your thoughts swirl like autumn leaves in a breeze. The last time Sunghoon read for leisure, you were in primary school, buddy reading Diary of a Wimpy Kid. But this—this is different. You can’t help but stare at him, awestruck as you take him in. His eyes are wide, shining amber in the sunlight as he pushes some of his hair from his face, frowning when it falls back where it was.
“Don’t look at me like that,” he mumbles.
Sunghoon takes a new line in his document and points at the screen where you watch the cursor move through the words he’s typing: I would’ve read and annotated the Bible if you wanted me to..
There’s no time to digest what he wrote or the funny feeling in your chest as you reread it before he deletes the whole sentence, pressing his lips together and looking out the window. Speechless, you stare at his side profile, willing your heart rate to slip back to normal. Steep-sloping nose, plump lips flattened into a line, two points of the triangular mole constellation on his face. Analysis worsens your condition, breath hitching in your throat before stopping entirely. Warmth and trepidation blend within you, fuzzy enough at the edges to seem like one thing—a single force that makes your palm itch with desire, desperation, to reach out and run a finger over his features, feel the bump of the mole on his nose — the most prominent — against your skin.
You remain this way — silent, watching — even when your lecturer resumes the lesson, and Sunghoon starts typing, writing, and listening again. Polite enough to pretend he doesn’t notice your gaze searing into his face.
After class, and his meeting with Coach, you let Sunghoon lead the conversation and the way to your flat, where you find Chaewon and Yunjin sitting on the couch, whispering to themselves while the two of you study at the coffee table. It’s uncomfortable, an awkward height, too high for the way you’re sitting but you feel calm under the supervision of Chaewon and Yunjin—you won’t do anything to merit teasing in front of them, no matter how badly you want to feel Sunghoon’s face in your hands or stroke his cheekbones with your thumbs.
To the best of your ability, you answer the questions he has for you—he’d written a ton in his tiny notepad during class, his own concerns clear with each neatly-penned iteration of: How to see actions/dialogue for what they are and not what I want them to be? written in the margins and you try not to feel heartbroken for him.
Three hours have passed by when you walk him to the door, the two of you wrapped up in a bubble so secure you’re surprised to find Chaewon and Yunjin still sitting on the couch. They don’t say anything about Sunghoon in his absence, or the fact he’d given you his sweater when he noticed you were cold. You’re not sure why their silence disappoints you.
Instead, Yunjin asks you about trivial things like dinner while Chaewon sits in silence.
“What flavour for ice cream?” Yunjin asks, rolling her eyes when you tug on the blanket but not complaining. “And don’t say something ridiculous like mint chocolate, YN.”
“That happened once! And it was three years ago.. How was I supposed to know you hate fun?”
Chaewon leans into you, letting you curl your limbs around her from behind as you rest your chin on her shoulder, liking the way her clean scent tickles your nose.
“Mint-cho isn’t that bad,” she starts. “It’s a little jarring, sure, but it’s kind of sweet. Like watching people come to terms with their feelings for each other.”
You nod your head, humming in understanding and furrowing your brows when Yunjin scoffs, staring straight at you. Her tone is equal parts cutting and loving, so you know she’s not trying to insult you, but don’t know what she means when she says, “It must be so nice to be as oblivious as you.”
Yunjin never elaborates, and you never ask, actually feeling the statement’s journey in through one of your ears and out the other when dinner arrives. The three of you share pizza, ice cream, and secrets — the three pillars of 20-something-teenage-girlhood — at the kitchen table, with Chaewon sitting in your lap and picking pepperoni from your slices.
It’s only hours after Yunijn’s gone home, that her words circle back to you, the statement and all of its weight perching on your chest with all the debilitation and persistence of a sleep paralysis demon.
“I think I’m getting sick,” you say as soon as she opens her door. “It’s been coming on for a while now, at least a week, maybe more.”
Unimpressed and exhausted, Yunjin looks down at you through half-closed eyes. “Do you..” She pinches the bridge of her nose, sighing. “Do you have any idea what time it is right now?”
“Yes. It’s three a.m.”
“Exactly. See a doctor if you’re sick, I’m going back to sleep.”
“This is an emergen—” Yunjin cuts you off by pinching your lips together. “It’s three in the morning,” she reminds you. “You can’t yell like that in my hallway, come in.”
You nod, crossing the threshold and taking off your shoes next to hers. “Sorry,” you whisper when the door is closed.
Using her hand, Yunjin lifts your chin, squinting as her eyes adjust to the light when she flips the switch to inspect your face. “You don’t look or sound sick,” she mutters, flicking the light back off and going to her room. “What are your symptoms? And why did you come here?”
You don’t have an answer for her last question so you ignore it, following her and tripping over a pair of her shoes in the process. “My cheeks start burning like crazy and my heart races, sometimes it gets hard to breathe.”
“You seem fine to me.”
A shoulder-slumping sigh slips from your lips. “That’s the thing. I’ll be fine and then Sunghoon shows up with his pretty smile and perfect hair and I feel like I’ve run a marathon.” You know how it sounds, choosing your wording meticulously to let Yunjin be the one to say the words out loud instead of you—it’ll be easier to confront that way.
From the doorway, you watch as she arches a brow, her interest piqued. “Oh?”
“I know.” You nod, head bobbing rapidly in furious agreement. “It’s only a matter of time before I cough up a lung and die in his bedroom.”
At your words, Yunjin doesn't reply, only lifting her duvet and getting cosy underneath. You feel like you’re glued to the spot, waiting for her to say something, anything, but nothing comes. All she does is pat the empty spot in her bed.
“What are you smirking for?” you ask, entering the room properly and closing the door.
Her response only comes after you’ve taken your jacket and hoodie off, sitting next to her under the covers. “It’s nothing,” she says, laughing.
“Tell me.”
Yunjin sighs, resting a hand gently on your shoulder. You think it’s meant to be comforting but it’s the opposite. “You’ll be fine, I promise. Lovesickness isn’t deadly.”
Feeling the weight of her reassurance, you settle down properly and sigh when your head hits the pillow. Lovesickness. Hmm.
Closing your eyes, you try to sleep but can’t help tossing and turning as Yunjin snores behind you. You pat blindly around the end table for your phone, grabbing it and wincing at the brightness of your screen. Chewing on your lip, you open Google, looking up ‘lovesickness’ and frowning immediately at the results. Endless negativity fills the screen, terrifying words like ‘unrequited love’ forming a pit in your stomach. There’s nothing negative about what you feel for Sunghoon, nothing unrequited—you think.
It was obvious during the trip, painfully so. In the way he’d tuck your hair behind your ear when his parents weren’t there to see, or how he slipped up and called you ‘baby’ in the bathroom, blushing when you said it back. You can’t fake something like that.. Can you?
Yeonjun did.
Shaking your head, you open Instagram to distract yourself. Jake’s story comes up first; he’s at a party where Jay is losing a game of beer pong, and at the other end of the table is Sunghoon grinning with a bright red lipstick kiss on his cheek. You lock your phone, using your hands to press on your belly to stop the stirring.
Oh, you think. Lovesickness.
When you wake up, the first thing you do is check Jake’s story again. The video is still there and that terrible stir in your stomach churns on, burrowing deeply into a pit of canyon-like proportion—so vast there’s a safety railing lining its edges.
You eat breakfast in silence with Yunjin, zoning out mid-chew to figure out the origin of these feelings and how to handle them. Suddenly, the moment hits you clear as day, vivid like you’re watching it on a screen—it was your third night at his parents’ house, after your walk.
You felt bad about how you acted, and what you said, so went straight up to your room. With nothing but the bedside lamp turned on, it was dimly lit, shadows cast on the walls as you sulked, replaying everything in your head. Guilt wrapped its long arms around your body, making you feel sick as you thought about it all. About the hurt etched over his face with every word you said, and the frown that stuck around for the rest of the walk as his hand clung limply to yours.
There was a knock at the door, so gentle you almost missed it, and Sunghoon was standing there when you pulled it open, chewing on his lip with a mug in his hand. Steam skated over the opening, a rich chocolatey smell hitting your nose but the real kicker was the mug itself. In its place on Jake and Sunghoon’s mug tree, it was unassuming, a regular white mug, but upon meeting hot water, the face of young Sunghoon appeared, grinning with his tiny glasses on. It was a gift from one of his old coaches and though he never used it, it was your absolute favourite cup in the world.
You felt soft around the edges when you looked up at him, his eyes wide and unsure as you met his gaze—he brought that mug three hours across the country so you could use it again. The thought shifted your heart into a comfortable position, settling in your chest with overwhelming warmth and an increased rate.
“Hi,” you said, clearing your throat.
“Hi,” he repeated, holding the mug out for you to take. “It’s still hot so be careful.”
Nodding, you covered your hands with your sleeves, taking the cup from him and asking if he wanted to come in. Sunghoon nodded, shutting the door behind him and standing by the bed, watching you set the hot chocolate on the bedside table as you sat down. The two of you stayed like that for a while, with him only moving when you patted the spot next to you on the duvet. Your train of thought escaped you as soon as he sat down, the warmth of his familiar fresh, citrusy scent taking over and becoming the only thing you could register. The smell of summers with him, long days at the beach and short nights spent on the couch at random parties, cuddled into his side with his arm over your shoulders. The smell you’d come to associate with comfort and home—with Sunghoon.
“It’s not fair for me to treat you like shit just because I’m annoyed, I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that earlier. I’m sorry.”
A crease ran over Sunghoon’s thick brows as they tugged together, he shook his head. “You don’t have to apologise. I roped you into this whole thing and didn’t even try to think about how you would feel. I’m sorry.” His eyes carried a mix of regret and sincerity, mirroring the weight of his words.
“Anyway, I only came to bring you that,” he said, pointing at the cup. “And to check up on you, I’ll get out of your hair for tonight.” Sunghoon wiped his palms on his pants before standing up, reaching behind him to pick up the cloth he brought. For a moment, he stood there, staring down at it in his hand while you thought about telling him to stay, telling him that you wanted him in your hair—whatever that meant. But he spoke before you had the chance. “You left this, at mine, after.. well, you know. I’m sure you left it intentionally, I mean it was folded up perfectly on the end of my bed, so I know you did, but it didn’t feel right keeping it, you always wore it more than me.”
Sunghoon extended his hand, holding it out to you and you knew exactly what it was as soon as the fabric touched your skin after so long. It was the shirt Jay bought him for Christmas in first year—they were roommates still trying to get a feel for each other. For a few weeks, Sunghoon had been pestering you about what he should get for Jay, saying it didn’t feel right not to get him anything, and you suggested a targeted t-shirt, one you’d been laughing at all day after seeing an ad for it on your timeline. Sunghoon was sceptical, but bought the red shirt anyway, hoping Jay would find BEING DAD IS AN HONOUR, BEING PAPA IS PRICELESS funny. He did. And Jay bought Sunghoon a targeted shirt too, your favourite. It was black and two sizes too big, with I NEVER DREAMED I’D BE A SEXY FIGURE SKATER BUT HERE I AM KILLING IT written over the chest.
“Goodnight, YN,” Sunghoon said, crossing the room to leave but hesitating before closing the door. He poked his head through the opening and sighed. “I really am sorry.”
That night, you fell asleep in the shirt, the thinning, yet cosy, fabric wrapped around you like a hug as your heart started to beat a new rhythm, one that eerily echoed the five-foot-eleven figure skater who you let break it.
This morning, Yunjin claps her hands in your face, seeming irritated when you look over at her. “You have class in an hour, what are you doing?” Before you have the chance to speak, realisation covers her face. “Oh, the feelings.”
You nod solemnly, too caught up in the butterflies raiding your stomach to come up with something to say.
At lightspeed, you scarf down the rest of your food, apologising for showing up so late as you head out the door. When you get home, you take the fastest shower of your life and feel grateful Chaewon isn’t around to tease you about the smile you can’t wipe from your face thinking about Sunghoon—you’ll text her later.
You run to campus, feeling the brisk autumn wind beating against your face while the rest of your body overheats under your jacket, hoodie and long sleeve. Despite the discomfort and ache in your lungs, you don’t stop until you reach the door of your lecture hall, huffing and puffing into the faces of classmates who don’t take any notice. Of course, in a stroke of pure luck, your lecturer is late, and you realise bitterly, that all of your huffing and puffing was in vain—you would have gotten to class with time to spare even if you walked.
It’s not a total waste though; you use the time to update Chaewon.
you: i have news wonie.. i like sunghoon
wonie: …………….. fork in the kitchen yn what’s the news?
wonie: OHHHH news to YOU.. can i call?
She calls you immediately. You answer without thinking because your lecturer still hasn’t arrived, and there’s no one sitting close enough to hear or notice you taking a call.
“Are you going to tell him?!” Chaewon’s voice is so loud you wince, pulling the phone away from your ear.
“I don’t know.” You shrug even though she can’t see you, still holding the device at a distance just in case. “I don’t have any confirmation that he still.. likes me. It’s been a while, and I was pretty mean that day.
Chaewon groans and you can picture her throwing herself onto her bed, exasperated. The rustling that comes through the receiver only frames the image, hanging it up. “Did you have to tell him to get a grip?”
“You know..” You trail off, chewing on your bottom lip. “In hindsight, probably not.”
A beat passes, she’s thinking. “Don’t worry,” she says. “I’ll help you.”
“I.. have never been so worried in my life.” You sigh, picking at your freshly painted nails. “But I know you’ll do something no matter what I say, so do what you want, Wonie, but please be subtle about it.”
Chaewon squeals down the phone. “I love youuuuu!” And it’s the last thing she says before kissing the mic a few times and hanging up.
Slumping in your seat, you don’t have any time to stress about Chaewon’s plans because your lecturer walks in, with a travel cup in her hand and a paperback tucked under her arm.
She apologises for being late, running a hand through her hair as she announces that you’ll be watching a film, an adaptation of a book you read at the start of term—Ian McEwan’s Atonement. You spend the first hour of the movie falling in and out of sleep until a text comes through from Sunghoon, and sheer excitement keeps you up.
hoonie: Wanna study together after class?
you: of course!!!!!!
hoonie: 🤍
The rest of the movie goes by in a drag, and you come away from it with a mild irritation towards Saoirse Ronan.
you: class just finished, heading to lib rn
hoonie: Shit, still in the locker room, sorry !!! Omw, can you get a table?
you: i’ll try..
It takes a while but you find an empty booth on the second floor, and set your bag on the plush green seat to take pictures of your surroundings to send to Sunghoon. You sit on the side facing the stairs so he can see you when he arrives. The thought of seeing him makes your heart race and you try out a few natural-seeming poses for when he’s here, cycling between resting your palm under your chin and sitting with your arms crossed a few times until the top of his head comes into view.
Seeing him knocks the wind out of you as he approaches the staircase, taking them two at a time with his damp hair clinging to his forehead and neck. It doesn’t help that he’s wearing a tight black vest, and his sweats are hanging low on his hips. A breath you didn’t realise you were holding slips out when he lifts his head, spotting you immediately as a grin spreads over his lips and he raises his arm to wave, the veins in his forearm peeking out to say hi too. You can’t tell if it’s his lack of winter wardrobe or your newfound appreciation for him that’s making his biceps look so huge but it’s hard to look away, even when he reaches the table.
“Are you hot?” you blurt out.
Sunghoon laughs, raising a brow and something about the way he’s looking down at you makes your cheeks burn. “Depends who’s asking.” He takes his backpack off, leaving it on the table as he sits down, dumping his jacket and hoodie in a pile beside him.
“I’m asking,” you mumble.
“Then, yeah, I’d hope so.”
Is he flirting? It sounds like he’s flirting. Flirt back! “Nice arms.”
He looks down at his biceps for a beat before looking at you warily. “Are you flirting with me?” He can’t fight the smile twitching at the corners of his lips but he tries his best, pressing them into a straight line.
“A little. They are nice though,” you admit.
Sunghoon grins. “Thanks, I’ve had them for a while now.”
You can’t come up with anything to say, too distracted by the way his smile reaches his eyes, lighting up his whole face and forcing a flustered heat to spread over your cheeks and neck. It’s only when you look away from him that you remember what you’re here for. It’s a study date, not a study date—there’s a difference.
You hand Sunghoon the material you’d printed for him over the weekend, excerpts from texts you’d studied in class, so he can practise close reading and proper citation. As he makes his way through them, you can’t help stealing glances, smiling at the way his tongue sticks out a little while he focuses, or how he twirls his pen in his fingers while he’s thinking. You aren’t making the best use of your time together, copying out the slides from class yesterday, but you can’t help noticing the way he watches you when he thinks you can’t see. The small smile on his face while he does so only flusters you, an odd weakness settling in your knees as your cheeks heat up.
After a while, Sunghoon sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Could you stop watching me?”
“If you noticed me watching, that means you’re watching me.”
He shrugs, chewing on his lip. “Well, yeah. I’m always watching you,” he says like it’s a given. “But you don’t normally watch back, it’s distracting.”
“You’re distracting.”
A playful smile curves his lips as he arches a brow, smugness painting his face. “Am I?”
Too scared to verbalise your response, you nod slowly, hoping you don’t look as wound up as you feel.
Sunghoon’s eyes flick over your face, flashing with something you don’t recognise. At least not from him. He sits back in his seat, assessing you and eventually shaking his head.
“You know,” he says, eyes glowing with something you do recognise: cockiness. “If my sexy arms are getting to you that much, I can always put my hoodie back on. Wouldn’t want my little tutor getting distracted, would I?”
Oh.
Your stomach turns with want, mind reeling from his tone and the way his gaze lands on your lips. Sighing, you roll your eyes and try to seem unaffected. “Sunghoon, I never said your arms were sexy.”
His phone starts to go off, buzzing against the table and he turns it over immediately, screen down on the surface as he shifts his focus back to his work. He chews on his lip while he does, eyes flicking back and forth between his phone and the words on the page. Curious, you lean over the table, elbows propped up as you rest your chin in your hands. He doesn’t spare you or his phone, which vibrates another four times, a glance.
“Are you going to get that?”
Sunghoon shakes his head. “It’s nothing.”
You hum, letting just enough curiosity seep into the sound that he’ll elaborate without being asked to. It doesn’t take long for him to deliver.
“It’s just Chaewon,” he says, running his hand through his hair and lifting his head. Sunghoon smiles. “We’ve been texting a lot these days.”
“Cool.” You nod a few times, aiming for nonchalance but hitting bobblehead as you wait for him to continue. He doesn’t, only humming in response, nodding too.
After a beat, he picks up his phone, angling it just high enough that you can’t see the screen. He reads the messages, an exhaled laugh coming from his nose as the tips of his ears redden—Fuck. This is worse than you thought.
Chaewon’s commitment to girl code runs deep—she’s been rebuffing Jake since first year when she overheard a girl she’d never seen before telling her friends she thought he was cute. So you know without having to read the texts that nothing she’s saying is even remotely flirty, you can smell the auto-caps and use of the word ‘buddy’ from across the table.
What you hadn’t counted on, however, was the potential for Sunghoon’s feelings to shift. If they really have been texting more, can you rule out the possibility that he might like.. her? Chaewon is a catch, beyond a catch, and you’d already turned Sunghoon down. Brutally. Of course, he’d move on, he has moved on.
The rest of the study session is spent manifesting, writing Park Sunghoon over and over in the back of your notebook. You fill three pages while brainstorming ways to snatch a lock of his hair until he suggests that the two of you call it a day. He walks you home, telling you about how Jake’s been bribing him with food to get a ride to the LEGO store across town for the new Marvel set.
“With or without the meals, I would’ve taken him, but his ramen is my favourite, so..” Sunghoon says, climbing the last step of your building and holding the door open for you. “He even brought a slice of tiramisu to the rink for me after practice.”
“You’re terrible,” you say, frowning up at him as you search for your keys. “Do you want to come in?”
Sunghoon chuckles, shaking his head. “I have a meeting with one of my lecturers soon, I’d have to leave in—” He pauses, rolling up the sleeve of his jacket to check the time. “—eight minutes.”
“I’m cool with that if you are,” you mumble, suddenly shy.
A bright smile spreads over his lips and he nods, following you in.
Chilled by the harsh wind, the only thing on your mind is a hot drink as you lead Sunghoon to the kitchen. He shakes his head when you offer him one, sitting on the countertop and exhaling into his palms before rubbing them together. You can’t help but frown at the sight, feeling guilty that you can’t change the weather to suit him. At your thought process, your brows raise. Wow, you think. Is this who you are?
You busy yourself with the selection of hot drinks you and Chaewon have accumulated, eyeing each container from top to bottom. A purple tub of Cadbury’s hot chocolate that you’re sure is on the brink of expiration, coffee—sachets of the instant stuff you’ve grown to like since leaving home, Earl grey from one of many brands, or the fancy silk tea bags Chaewon’s mum brought home from a trip—rooibos or plum-apple-cinnamon.
Craving something sweet, you settle for hot chocolate, pulling the heavy container from the cupboard next to Sunghoon’s head and setting it beside your cup. He’s on his phone, scrolling too fast to take in anything he’s seeing and he shakes his head when you ask if he wants something to drink.
On the dish rack, Chaewon’s mug catches your eye, so you pick it up to dry it off and put it down next to yours. “I’m going to check if Wonie wants any,” you say, wiping imaginary crumbs from the counter onto the floor.
Sunghoon only clears his throat, shaking his head. “She’s not home, one of her acrylics popped off so she’s at the shop waiting for a cancellation.”
The information itself isn’t jarring but hearing it from Sunghoon is. You put on what you hope is a neutral smile and nod, taking milk from the fridge and assembling your drink on autopilot while thinking of ways to redirect the conversation.
“If you knew you’d have to go back to campus so soon, why’d you walk me home?” you ask, watching your cup spin in the microwave. “I could’ve walked on my own.”
Sunghoon is already looking at you when you turn your head, his cheeks puffed out with air as he blinks slowly. Because I love you, is what you hope he’ll say. You think you need him to say it.
“Because you don’t have to do anything on your own when you have me,” he says instead, and it’s infinitely better.
The words seep through your every fibre, his intonation and lucid affection making a home for themselves in your heart, spreading warmth from head to toe. Your smile becomes a radiant grin, only brightening when he shakes his head, smiling down at his feet.
Sunghoon hugs you in the kitchen when it’s time for him to leave, his arms holding you tight to his chest as he rocks you back and forth. You inhale his scent, all warm citrus under freshly washed cotton and something exclusive to him.
Wiping the smile from your face feels impossible. You don’t let go when he does, and a sweet laugh — a giggle, you think — tumbles out of him as he mumbles that he really has to go. Still, you cling onto him, taking clumsy steps backwards, with your arms locked around his waist, to your front door, smiling as you watch him put his shoes on.
“You don’t have to walk me downstairs, honestly,” he says, looking down at you in the doorway.
“I want to.”
His lips quirk up at the corners, a full smile breaking through and causing your stomach to flutter with so much force you’re sure it’s visible through your shirt. His eyes fall to your lips, lingering, before he clears his throat, looking away.
“I’ll text you when I get to the door, promise.”
You lock your pinky with his. “Send a selfie, just so I know it’s you and not someone else using your phone.”
Sunghoon’s head falls back in a laugh. “Should I just call you? That way you can make sure I get back to uni in one piece.”
You nod.
“That wasn’t anything with Chaewon earlier, I just needed advice on some girl stuff..” He trails off, searching your eyes. It’s obvious that he’s telling the truth, that he wants you to believe him. You do. “I wasn’t sure if that was something I could talk about with you.”
Girl stuff. Hmm. You try not to read too much into it and look at the bigger picture instead—your best friend is going through something and doesn’t feel like he can come to you about it.. You squeeze his pinky reassuringly, a flutter in your stomach when he smiles.
“You can talk to me about anything,” you say, meaning it.
Sunghoon presses his lips together, humming and unlinking your fingers. “Next time,” he says after a beat, waving at you.
You shut the door, locking it while watching through the peephole, he leaves as soon as the lock clicks shut. In the kitchen, your hot chocolate is cooling down, and your phone rings in your back pocket. Sunghoon’s calling.
Hanging out with Sunghoon. Making sure he sticks to the time-blocked schedule you made for him. Quizzing him on biology terms until he gets restless. If the last two weeks were an episode of Family Feud, those would be the top three answers to the question: Name something YN is doing right now.
Thankfully tonight, it’s the first one.
You’ve been sitting on the couch for so long, Jake has both left for football practice and arrived from football practice. Conversation ebbs and flows—an hour or so of nonstop talking, followed by another hour or so of comfortable near silence.
It’s during a quiet hour that Sunghoon sits up straight, clearing his throat before saying, “Let me ask you something. He retreats to the other side of the couch, turning to face you with his whole body. “I don’t want things to be weird after I ask, so no matter what your answer is, I won’t bring it up or ask again.”
Arching a curious brow, you nod. “You can ask me anything,” you say, meaning it.
Sunghoon’s face is impressively blank—minus the motion of sharp teeth worrying plush lip, there’s absolutely nothing behind his eyes that seem to stare right through you.
Eventually, he asks, “Can I kiss you?” He says more. Big, scary words like for closure and moving on, but they don’t register. They don’t matter.
Your heart pounds at the base of your throat as you find interest in your hands that sit in your lap. Even without looking at him, you can’t get over the slight crease he had in his brow and the slight tremor in his hands.
“For closure,” you repeat, though your voice doesn’t sound like it’s coming from you, muffled under the thump of your heart.
Sunghoon nods. “For closure.”
A humourless laugh sneaks past your throat as you look at him. You shouldn’t have. In the lamplight, Sunghoon is golden and glorious. Warm light casts one side of his face, diffusing gently over the steep slope of his nose, highlighting his moles and the look in his eyes, gentle and curious all at once. Unwillingly, your gaze falls to his lips, parted, tempting.
One firm nod of your head brings Sunghoon’s hand to your face, his palm cupping your cheek with soft skin as his thumb traces your cheekbone. You grow anxious under his stare, under the drag of his eyes over your features, taking them one at a time like he’s committing them to memory.
Leaning in, your eyes flutter shut as your lips meet his and he freezes, mouth completely still on yours. Delicately, your tongue traces the seam of his lips, soft and plump, until they part for you, moving with yours. Sunghoon’s kiss is unpolished when it reaches you. It’s hesitant but tender, clumsy but sweet, he’s trying and he’s perfect; your favourite.
The kiss is.. it’s everything. It’s the racing of your heart, the thudding, the vibrant buzz you can hear, feel humming against your ears. It’s a rush of blood to the head, a lightness all over that pulls you out of your body. It’s Sunghoon’s soft lips curving into a smile against yours, his gentle hold on your face never letting up as he holds you as close as he can manage, and it’s every bit as lovely as the rest of him.
Palpable is the heartbeat of your friendship, beating to a lull under the surface of the kiss, fizzling out into nothing, a steady silence, flatlining to give way to something more, something bigger.
Every brush of your lips against his is a revelation, a confession. You’re all I’ve ever wanted, you tell him with your kiss. You’re everything I need. His free hand finds yours, locking your fingers and squeezing, the action timed well enough to make you think he hears you, to make you think he’s saying, we’ll be okay, I still love you.
With that, he pulls away, a delicate tension piercing the air. Blown eyes and laboured breathing—he’s beautiful, fuzzy around the edges with warm orange and all of the love in your heart. Breathless, you chew on your lip, cognisant of Sunghoon’s hand in yours and the sparkle in his eyes as he looks at you.
Belatedly, you squeeze his hand back, smiling. “Was it everything you ever dreamed of?” you whisper, part teasing, all curious.
Abruptly, Sunghoon stands up, letting go of you in the process. “I have to go.”
You want to stop him, you think you’re supposed to. To grab him by the arm and kiss him again, to yell in his face that you love him until he understands. But you don’t. Instead, you stay seated, staring at Sunghoon’s back and following him with your eyes out of the room and down the hall until he’s out of sight.
It’s your first time being so upset after a kiss, and you can’t tell if it’s his leaving or the mention of him moving on that’s tripping you up so much. That’s causing melancholy to crawl from the shadows, sinking its jagged nails into your skin to pull you under.
You love him. He’s gone.
Eyes stuck on the doorway, time stretches over the room around you, thick and malleable, wet and cloying—clay stuck under your nails for days as the fire in the kiln rages on.
Sighing, you get up and wait at his door. You ball your hand into a limp fist, knocking weakly. Sunghoon doesn’t reply. You try again, harder. Still nothing.
Barging into the room, you find him sitting on the end of his bed with his face in his hands.
“Don’t move on.” The words come out before you realise and Sunghoon lifts his head, squinting at you.
“Huh?” He tilts his head, watching closely as you approach him, tipping it back enough to meet your eyes when you stand over him.
You take a breath, holding it until your head starts to spin. “I don’t want you to love someone else, Sunghoon. Please don’t move on.”
The stillness that follows is disconcerting, a long quiet you can feel on your skin, amplifying the blank stare on his face as he looks up at you. His eyes flash, a spark of hope behind them so bright it stings to look at.
“Do you..” He trails off, his lips moving to form the next word though stopping short.
“I do,” you whisper, nodding. “I’m sorry for taking so long.”
An exhaled laugh comes from his nose as he grins, shaking his head. “You like me?” he asks, excitement and disbelief fighting for authority over his voice, his hands holding your waist and pulling you down into his lap.
“I love you,” you admit, settling on his thighs.
“You do?” His eyes are wide and gleaming, searching every feature on your face before settling on your own.
You nod. “So much.”
Sunghoon’s chin tips up, his lips pressing against yours, excited pecks that can’t turn into much more for the smiles on your faces. You rest your arms on his shoulders, hands clasping behind his head, nervous fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.
“So.. will you be my boyfriend? For real?”
Tilting his head, he tries and fails to fight a smile. “I will. I’m a little bummed though.”
“Why?” You raise a brow, and the word tips up at the end with it.
“I wanted to be the one to ask you.” Sunghoon’s honesty warms the room, endearing you completely.
You grin, loving the heat spreading over your cheeks. “Ask me anyway.”
“Please can I be your boyfriend?”
In the weeks that followed, it became immediately clear that boyfriend Sunghoon operated on a pendulum swinging between sexual ferality and terror. He’d get distracted during study sessions at home, finding more interest in biting at your neck than stream-of-consciousness prose, but closed his eyes if a sex scene came on TV. He’d buck his hips against yours while making out but flinch at the sight of condoms in the store.
He wasn’t ready to have sex and didn’t know how to tell you, so you took matters into your own hands, asking if you could wait until after his results for resubmission came in, saying you didn’t want the distraction for either of you. Sunghoon agreed, pecking your cheek and holding you tight to his chest.
The only thing was that your lecturer hadn’t given him an exact date, so every morning, you held your phone in a vice grip waiting for Sunghoon to update you, and every morning, you got the same text: Nothing today, baby ☹️
This morning, you’re brushing your teeth when he texts you, in all caps: NO FUCKING WAY I GOT A 98 !!! LOOK !!!
When the picture comes through, it’s of him in the mirror and you choke on mouthwash at the sight. He’s smiling, bright and beautiful, in a black vest that he’s holding up a little to show his stomach, though his palm is in the way of his toned abs, and it cuts off right at the top of his grey sweatpants.
Your mouth goes dry as you click on it, fixating on every little detail you can find: the thickness of his fingers against his phone, the dip in his collarbones, the breadth of his shoulders and the cinch of his waist. In a fit of desperation, you try swiping at the bottom of your screen, willing the picture to magically extend. It doesn’t.
hoonie: Finger slipped.. You like?
you: mm..
you: 98??? HOLY SHIT, LOOK AT YOU!!!
hoonie: All you.. do you like the picture?
you: i love it………….
hoonie: My girl 🤍
Another picture comes in, and sure enough, through the glare of his laptop screen, you see: Course name: The Modernist Movement: Joyce, Woolf, and Hemingway. Marks Awarded: 98.0.
you: well done baby !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hoonie: Thx 😁
hoonie: Can I have my prize now ha ha .. haha 😈
you: just for that emoji, no you absolutely cannot.
Your resolve isn’t strong enough when it comes to Sunghoon, because purple devil emoji and all, you show up at his door with condoms in your bag and a bouquet of lilies behind your back.
The door creaks open and Sunghoon greets you with a grin. “Hey, gorgeous. You proud of me?”
You beam at him, holding out the flowers. “I’m very proud, Hoon, well done.”
“I don’t want to ruin the moment,” he starts, taking the bouquet from your hands and sniffing the flowers with an approving smile. “But hearing you say you’re proud of me is awakening something I didn’t know existed.”
“A good something?”
“Mm,” he hums, arms finding your waist before he pecks your lips. “A very good something.”
Sunghoon’s words hit your lips and your core, a desperate heat flooding your stomach as he kisses you deeply, his body pressed tightly against yours while he pulls you into his apartment. He kicks the door shut with his foot, slipping his hand under your jacket to settle in your back pocket, not quite squeezing but holding your ass as gently as he can manage.
He breaks away from you, love in his eyes as he stares down into yours, catching his breath. “I don’t think we own a vase.”
In his kitchen, you rifle through cupboards to find something to hold the flowers, eventually finding a whiskey decanter in the cupboard under the sink, and holding it up for Sunghoon to see.
“Oh, yeah,” he says. “It’s Jay’s. It’ll work right?”
You nod, taking it to the sink to rinse it. Sunghoon wraps his arms around you from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder watching you fill the decanter with water and flower food before grabbing the bouquet. He presses open-mouthed kisses to your neck and you struggle to stay focused as you cut down the stems on the flowers, arranging them neatly.
“Can I take a photo?” he asks when you’re done.
He’s smiling when you turn around to look at him, a soft curve of his lips that makes your heart race, a deep tenderness in his eyes when you meet them. You smile too.
“They’re yours, baby, do whatever you want.”
“A photo of you with the flowers,” he clarifies.
Warmth settles in your chest, a grin spreading over your lips from ear to ear. You nod, taking the decanter in your hands when he lets go of you, holding the flowers up beside your face and smiling for his camera. As his phone shutter clicks away, you steal glances at his face behind it. He’s watching the screen with a smile, telling you how beautiful you are.
“I want pictures of you too,” you say, handing the flowers over.
“I’m yours, baby, do whatever you want.”
Sunghoon poses for your photos, smiling sweetly in some and sniffing the bouquet appreciatively with closed eyes for others. He’s glowing and he’s beautiful and your heart triples in size while taking picture after picture until your phone tells you it has ten percent.
“Thank you, YN,” he says. “I’ve never gotten flowers before, I love them.” His arms settle around your waist, lips pressing against yours before you have the chance to respond.
You try anyway, mumbling against his lips that you love him. In response, Sunghoon grins, but the feeling of his cock growing hard against you is distracting, a lust-coated thorn in the side of the butterflies fluttering in your stomach. With locked lips and uncertain steps, the two of you bump into corners and trip over your own feet, stumbling to his room and parting only to tear his hoodie over his head.
Breathless, you pull away, eyes trailing over him and picking up on everything, from the tremble in his hands to the lust-addled worry in his eyes. He’s nervous, you think—though it escapes you, the last word coming out like a question.
Sunghoon scoffs, his hands resting on your waist under your shirt, skin clammy against yours. “Of course, I’m nervous.”
“You don’t have to be.”
“I just want to be good for you.”
“Don’t worry about that, let me take care of you, Hoon.” Your palms drag up his torso — firm abs through soft cotton, defined chest over racing heart — to rest on his shoulders. “Sit,” you say when he nods.
He gulps, taking a seat on the end of his bed under your gentle push, eyes widening when you sink to your knees between his legs and reach for his drawstring, pulling the ends to untie the knot.
“Wait,” Sunghoon says, breathless, scrunching up his face and dropping his head. “Let me calm down, baby. At this rate, I’ll come just seeing your hand on it.”
You giggle, resting your head on his thigh and wrapping the drawstring around your finger.
“I’m serious, YN,” he mumbles, laughing as he takes his vest off. “I need a minute.”
Sunghoon’s eyes are pressed shut as he tries to collect himself, lips pouty and kiss-bitten, slightly parted with ragged breaths slipping out. You wait patiently for him. He’s so pretty like this, with the crease in his brow and the pretty pink flush dusting his cheeks as his chest rises and falls. You can’t help but smile, leaning into his touch when his hand rests on top of your head, his blunt nails grazing your scalp. After a while, he seems more at ease, his eyes finding yours and he smiles shyly, telling you he’s ready now and lifting his hips from the bed to let you pull his sweats and underwear down.
Free from the constraints of fabric, his cock slaps his stomach with a wet sound as the tip meets his skin, leaving a pearlescent streak over his abs. The sight makes your mouth water and you can’t look away. “Pretty,” you whisper.
Wrapping a hand under his tip, you swipe it with your thumb, taking time to memorise the flutter of his eyelids, the bobbing of his Adam’s apple, and the soft sigh he lets out. You stroke him slowly, liking the way his breath picks up as his brows knit together before you take him in your mouth. It’s a tight fit but you do your best, spurred on by the way he tugs at your hair and stutters through a holy fuck as you take as much of him as you can.
Sunghoon goes silent, only squirming when you use your hand to stroke him near his base. Self-conscious about his lack of vocal affirmation, you look up at him through your lashes, and the pure bliss on his face is unbearably attractive. His eyes are rolled back under furrowed brows, his mouth hanging open as he throws his head back.
“Am I doing okay?” you ask, using the moment to catch your breath.
He nods, inhaling shakily and screwing his eyes shut while his hips buck up into your fist. “I’m.. You’re doing such a good job, baby, so good.”
Satisfaction courses through you from the praise, a high that dulls the ache in your jaw. Still watching him, you massage his balls in your palm, pressing open-mouthed kisses to his tip when he whines. You tongue at his slit until he thrusts back into your mouth, tip hitting your throat, and he gasps when you gag, his arm coming up to cover his eyes. A belated apology slips from his lips, mumbled as he strokes your hair with a shaking hand and goes quiet again. When you speed up, his breath stutters, the muscles in his thighs contracting around your head as you suck and lick and drool on his cock.
A moan of your name, and his hand holding your hand down, are the only warnings you get before Sunghoon comes, spilling his load right down your throat. Whining, his hips buck up against your face, pushing further and further until he falls back onto the mattress.
Your throat is hoarse and aches while you use the back of your hand to wipe at your lips, enjoying what’s left of his taste on your tongue. Deep red tints his neck and chest, a pretty flush gleaming under the sheen of sweat on his skin. He’s mesmerising, as he tries for air through swollen lips and looks up at you through squinted eyes. He reaches for you, cute grabby hands tugging your shirt and pulling you down so you’re lying next to him with your head on his chest.
“You’re amazing, baby, so good for me,” Sunghoon whispers, eyes fluttering shut as you drag your nails over his torso, feeling the subtle heave of the slick, sculpted muscle over his stomach and chest.
Pride heats your chest, satisfaction rolling over you like a wave. “Really?”
He hums in affirmation, nodding his head.
“You were so quiet, I couldn’t really tell,” you add, hungry for more praise.
“The walls are so thin in here, I just got used to being quiet,” Sunghoon says, frowning. Hand meeting your chin, he tips your head up towards him, pressing a soft kiss to your lips and mumbling, “I’m sorry. You were perfect, I swear.”
It’s a sweet kiss. Until lips move harder and hands get lower, desperate as he thumbs the top of your leggings, palm unmoving but a dangerous heat blooms in your stomach anyway.
“Can I..” Sunghoon pinches you softly through the material, unsure eyes boring deep into yours.
You nod. “You can.”
Slipping under your waistband, his fingers skate across your skin dipping between your thighs. He grazes your slit, satisfaction clear in the groan he lets out as he feels the wetness there, pulling it over the length of your slit to cover your clit. Your breath hitches, a strangled gasp, pleasure and surprise meeting in your throat under the pressure of his thumb on your clit, the gentle sting of his finger pushing into you.
What Sunghoon lacks in experience, he makes up for with the sheer length and thickness of his fingers. It’s almost jarring, it’s enough to force your eyes closed and bring a sigh rumbling out of you, ache and relief settling between your legs, where he curls a finger against your walls and drags slow circles over your clit.
“Can you take these off, baby?” he asks, hand away to touch your leggings.
You don’t waste a second, sitting up to pull them off, throwing them and your underwear across the room. Sunghoon licks his lips, tugging at the hem of your shirt.
“And this? If you want..”
You nod, pulling it off immediately to let it join the rest of your clothes in a heap on the floor. The way he gulps is a confidence boost, his dilated pupils taking in every inch of your body, though his gaze always pulls back to your bra—white and lacy, thin enough for your nipples to push through the fabric and Sunghoon can’t seem to get enough, though he waits until you’re lying down again to touch you.
Sunghoon props himself up on his elbow, leaning over you. “You’re beautiful,” he whispers, dragging a finger over the lace at the top of your bra, toying with the material and the little bow sitting between your breasts. His eyes flick up to meet yours. “So beautiful,” he repeats.
Hiding your face in his chest, you mumble, “Thank you,” into his skin while trying to ignore the heat spreading over your body wherever he touches you. His hand trails from your arm to your waist, resting on your hips to slip over your ass for a beat, where he grabs and squeezes the flesh there before coming back around to slot between your legs—you lift one of them, resting it over his body, and he’s smiling sweetly when you look up at him.
Sunghoon’s movements are unchanging, though the sensation is heightened by the unbridled desire in his lidded eyes that urges white heat to lick over every inch of your skin—this time he pushes two fingers into you.
It doesn’t get better than this, you think. But it does, quickly.
Leaning over you, his eyes flick across your face, one feature at a time as he chews on his lip. Reaching up, you push some of his hair from his face, holding it back and saying, “Relax, baby.”
“Don’t want to hurt you.”
Moving your hand, you blink when his hair flops back over his forehead, tickling your eyelashes. His eyes are focused now, staring straight down into yours, want and worry flashing behind them.
“You won’t, I promise,” you say, locking your pinky with his, feeling relieved when he smiles.
Sunghoon pushes in slowly, his name slipping from your lips when he exhales shakily, head falling forward. The sting, the pleasure, make it hard to breathe, molten desire taking hold of your lungs as he carves out a place for himself as far as you’ll take him, all the way to the hilt as slow as he can manage.
A moan tears out of him, lewd and whiny as his hair tickles your collarbone, head falling into the crook of your neck. His skin is hot and damp against yours, his breath burning your shoulder as he tries to calm down. It’s difficult to register much else, tethered only by the sound of his voice when he asks, “Am I hurting you?”
“Hoon,” you whisper.
“Can you look at me, baby?” He lifts his head, resting a hand on your cheek. You blink your eyes open, gaze locking with his, where concern pushes through his desire. “Am I hurting you?” he asks again. “Are you okay?”
You nod. “I’m okay, just..” You sigh. “Full. Need a minute.”
Sunghoon kisses you, lips moving gently with yours, passing breathy whines between your mouths until you feel yourself relaxing. Pulling his plush bottom lip between yours, you suck on it, nodding. “Want you to move, baby,” you mumble.
He scans your face, eyes meeting yours as he pulls his hips back. He’s slow, so slow with his thrusts that your belly turns with want, your fingernails sink into the taut skin of his back, and jagged sobs fall out of you with each drag of his cock along your walls.
Everywhere his skin touches yours is set ablaze with scorching heat, goosebumps pushing past the surface as his breath fans your neck and his sharp teeth graze your skin. He bites hard enough to sting, and you wince as his tongue flicks over your bitten flesh to soothe you.
You were so worked up earlier, writhing against the sheets and coming undone in his palm, so bliss quickly pushes through the ache between your legs. “Good, Hoon, feels so good,” you manage, struggling to convey how perfect it is.
“Just want to make you feel good.” His words melt into each other, vowels soft and elongated as they curl around each other. He’s working up a steady rhythm, his tip consistently nudging you where you need it—the spot that makes the room blur around you. “That’s all I want.”
Before long, the knot in your stomach pulls you up from the mattress, arching your back towards the ceiling. Mouth to mouth, chest to chest—it’s the closest you’ve ever felt to someone else, the closest you’ve ever been. The thought alone knocks the wind out of you, and his persistent whining does nothing to help.
Your want and adoration for Sunghoon run bone-deep, inching up your spine and creeping over your shoulders, intertwined with an all-consuming pleasure that turns the heat in your stomach molten as a shudder zips through you. Even though you can’t find the words to let him know, he lifts your hips from the bed to fuck you deeper, harder, into the mattress until shaky orgasms pull both of you under.
You let him fall into you, fingers curling around his hair, whispering I love you into the skin of his neck as he comes, most of his weight on top of you while you catch your breath, relishing in the fullness you feel as the last waves of your high pull back. You stay like this for as long as he needs, his head coming up from the crook of your neck to smile at you before pressing his lips to yours. A sleepy haze fills the room around you, tongue swiping tongue as you giggle happily into his mouth.
After a while, he gets up, tying the condom to throw it away and comes back with his shirt. He uses it to clean up—gentle between your legs, pressing kisses to your calves while he does. Sunghoon’s tenderness wraps around your heart, and love clouds your vision, forming a blurry trail that follows all of his movements, glowing like something from a dream, ethereal, an apparition.
The bed dips beside you, his arms around you, pulling you in so his chin rests on your head. You push your cheek into his chest, hoping the two of you will meld into one—the thought makes you warm all over, a fuzziness that reaches every part of your body while he presses kisses into your hair, rubbing your back.
“I love you,” he says, voice as soft as the rest of him. “I’m glad I exist.”
mama park: Hi lovely 😍 missing you lots, wondering when you’ll be home for Xmas………..love ma
Sunghoon stirs, nose scrunching as he snores softly into the quiet of a winter morning. His chest rises and falls steadily under your head and he doesn’t move when you sit up. The lamp on his desk is still on — neither of you could be bothered getting up to turn it off last night — and under its dim glow, you admire him. Perfect lips gently curved—long lashes kissing the skin under his eyes.
Love hits you from all angles, warmth all over from head to toe despite the chill in Sunghoon’s room. You can’t help but grin, leaning up to nose along the underside of his chin, his natural scent so soft yet dizzying as you nuzzle into him. He stirs again, turning his head this way and that before resting, you feel a bit bad, deciding to leave him be and text his mum back.
you: hi mum !!! missing you sooooooo much :((( will be home asap
mama park: BTW Sunghoon told me everything. I raised such good actors LOL make sure he looks after you and keeps you happy!
you: i’m so sorry we lied to you..
you: but i’m really happy with him and he loves me a lot
you: i love him so much .. never been so sure of anyone in my life
© zreamy (2023), all rights reserved. do not repost, translate, or plagiarise my work. do let my know your thoughts !
permanent taglist: @asahicore
#sunghoon smut#enhypen smut#enha smut#enhypen scenarios#sunghoon scenarios#sunghoon x reader#park sunghoon smut#park sunghoon x reader#enhypen imagines#enhypen oneshots#sunghoon oneshots#sunghoon imagines#enhypen hard hours#fic.sunghoon
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HOW YOU GET THE GIRL ★ FC43
PAIRING ✦ franco colapinto x fem!sargeant!reader
SUMMARY ✦ with your brother's seat being taken by your admirer of the past year, you try your best to stay clear, but it's hard when franco is trying so goddamn hard to get your attention [ SMAU ]
WARNINGS ✦ cursing, very minor hate comments
REQUESTED ✦ here!
NOTES ✦ i am NOT fluent in italian or spanish so please correct me if i've messed up on either of them! i count this as the best of both worlds because i love having franco on the grid but i'm missing my goat logan. the faceclaim i've used is marissa long but feel free to picture whoever you want! my requests are open so feel free to leave a request :)
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liked by logansargeant, alex_albon, and 110,331 others
tagged logansargeant
yourusername logie, my bestest friend and the best older brother i could ever ask for. i am so so SO proud of you and the journey you have had during your formula one seasons. so many memories have been made, and i know that i will never ever forget the times we spent in the williams paddock, just having fun together (& bullying alex, obviously). the williams social media page won't be the same without me posting slips of you. trust me when i say this isn't the end, but simply the beginning. lots of love always and forever, y/n 💗
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logansargeant ❤️

liked by logansargeant, francolapinto, and 94,522 others
yourusername someone hit me up with an italian man please, i love this country
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user4 oh she's taking it
user5 mother as perrrr
user6 the sargeant genetics are LETHALLL
user7 please someone tell me why is she in italy if her brother doesn't drive for williams anymore?
user8 she's the williams social media manager!! she started in the same year as logan x
logansargeant baby sis ❤️
yourusername love you sm 💗
francolapinto did you know i'm actually half italian?
francolapinto sei molto bella🙏🙏 (you are very pretty)
user9 second year running and he's after y/n AGAIN IM CRYING
user10 after taking her brother's seat too PLEASEEE he has guts i have to give it to him
user11 FRANCO'S COMMENT I'M DYINGGGG
user12 and the way she's ignoring it too oh my days 😭 it's been a year and he's still on this
imessages ( y/n )




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yourusername week off 🍏
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user16 farm girl???
user17 where is she 😭😭
yourusername my best friend's farm 💗
user18 multi-talented girl fr
user19 she looks like she BELONGS fr
user20 she def doesn't want to go back to the old 9-5
yourusername oh def not
yourbsf my angel 🪽🤍
yourusername best time w you alwaysss 💗
francolapinto never wanted to be a goat so badly
user21 I AM PISSING MYSELF
user22 HE IS SO BLATANT AT THIS POINTTTT
user23 @/yourusername PLEASE WE NEED YOUR THOUGHTS ON FRANCO'S COMMENTS
user24 she def won't answer but it's still so fucking funny i can't

liked by logansargeant, francolapinto, and 97,210 others
yourusername most beautiful place 💗
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user28 beautyyyy
user29 please y/n we need to see your pinterest RIGHT NOW the vibes are everything
user30 okay but...you & franco??
user31 what about letting people have some privacy, hm?
user32 oh wowwww
francolapinto not as beautiful as you 😉❤️
yourusername 🤣🤣
user33 FRANCO YOU DID IT!!!
user34 watch as franco puts y/n noticed x1 in his bio now
user35 THE WAY HE ACTUALLY DID IT. GIRL...
user34 I AM CREASING I CANNOT
lilymhe baby girl 😍
yourusername my lilypad i love you to bits!!
logansargeant are you sure you and that lion aren't twins
yourusername i'm thinking we were separated at birth??

liked by francolapinto, alex_albon, and 699,303 others
tagged francolapinto
williamsracing and just like that, mr colapinto is a point scorer in formula one, in his second ever race!! congratulations franco, take a bow 👏💗
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user38 CONGRATULATIONS FRANCOOO!!
user39 big question is...which admin posted this?
user40 one MILLION percent y/n. no doubt about it.
user41 you can tell y/n posted this bc of her signature pink heart HAHA
user42 i just know somewhere franco is kicking his feet and giggling over y/n telling him to take a bow for his performance
user43 oh franco colapinto you have won me over
user44 seeing this and lowkey feeling so sad for logan
user45 no but imagine how y/n must feel?? her brother just leaving and having to post this, she must hate franco right about now
user46 honestly, judging by the post race interview, i think y/n is fine with franco scoring points, tbh!
yourusername 👏👏💗
francolapinto hearts ❤️
user47 I AM SOBBING THIS IS TOO CUTE??
imessages ( franco )


imessages ( y/n )




liked by logansargeant, francolapinto, and 101,989others
yourusername 🦢🦢
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user48 IS MISS Y/N OUT ON A DATE???
user49 facecard could kill.
user50 Y/N ON A DATE WHO CHEERED
user51 someone check up on franco like right now.
user52 either franco is the guy in the pictures and that's why he's not commenting, or he's entered a depressive state
user53 knowing his dramatic ass it could be either
alex_albon mystery man 👀🤑
yourusername shhhh albon
logansargeant i'll fight him if he hurts you 😁
yourusername love you too logie 🧸
imessages ( y/n )



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tagged francolapinto
yourusername city break 🇦🇷
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user54 FRANCO CAMEO FRANCO CAMEO THIS IS NOTTTT A DRILL
user55 I AM SCREAMING
user56 alexa play how you get the girl by taylor swift
user57 she's in his hometown...so this serious stuff now
user58 Y/N I LOVE YOU FOR THIS
francolapinto 😁❤️❤️
yourusername 💗💗
logansargeant willing to fly out to collect you if i have to 🫡
yourusername i promise you i'm fine 💗

liked by alex_albon, yourusername, and 1,112,091 others
tagged yourusername
francolapinto 1 AÑO DESPUÉS… ¡¡TENGO A LA CHICA!! ¡¡VAMOS!! la persona más hermosa por dentro y por fuera, con el corazón más grande que jamás haya existido. estoy tan feliz en este momento que las palabras no pueden explicarlo. te amo te amo te amo ❤️ (1 YEAR LATER… I GOT THE GIRL!! COME ON!! the most beautiful person inside and out, with the biggest heart that ever lived. i am so happy right now that words cannot explain it. i love you i love you i love you ❤️)
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user59 original y/n franco fans RISE
user60 WE ARE THE REAL WINNERS!!
user61 oh he is in love for real
user62 need someone to love me how he loves y/n
user63 their love is so so special
user64 okay but how's logan feeling about all this...? must be so awkward...
user65 judging by his comment...i think he's doing absolutely fine 🤣
logansargeant hurt her and i'm at your doorstep. 😊
francolapinto will never be a problem 🫡
yourusername you're the cutest ever
yourusername FRANCO 🤣🤣
francolapinto let me share my love for you, no?
yourusername i wanna kiss you so bad rn
logansargeant keep it pg-13 please.
yourusername logan.
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simp...ly lovely
feat. max verstappen
lyrics you: a worldwide renowned singer. max: four-time f1 world champion... and apparently your biggest fan?
maddie corny title, corny faceclaim, definitely corny concept, but i had SO MUCH fun writing it (if you want more smaus, send in your ideas!)
faceclaim @.lalalalisa_m
ynofficial
❤️ 3.8M 💬 18.2K
liked by tatemcrae, oliviarodrigo, maxverstappen1 and others
ynofficial singapore was UNREAL tonight. thanks to every single one of you for making it possible, i love u all <3 (still can't believe this was the last show tbh, miss u already)
asia tour over for now, see you guys soon xx
comments
tatemcrae ATE
ynofficial you can't spell ate without tate
❤️ by tatemcrae
user1 MOTHERS
user2 their friendship is my roman empire
oliviarodrigo prettiest girl everrrrr 💞
user3 collab when???
user4 yn x t8 would be the end of me
ynofficial back at you liv 💞💞💞
user5 AWWW
spotify our favorite pop princesses 💕
❤️ by ynofficial and oliviarodrigo
user6 prettiest besties alive fr
user7 the matching heart emojis 🥹
user8 people need a ynolivia tour ASAP
user11 the duality of woman
user9 i am people people is me
user10 YES PLEASE 💳💥💳💥💳💥
user12 i swear like how is that the same person
user13 good girl 🫦 vs good girl 😚
user16 "miss you already" JUST ADD NEW DATES???
user14 LITERALLY
user15 if girlhood is a spectrum was a person:
ynofficial working on it 🫶
user16 oh
user17 LMAO IT ACTUALLY WORKED
user18 @.user16 the hero we deserved 👏
user21 BODY. IS. TEA.
user19 wait so new dates actually confirmed!?
user20 omg chill she didn't say anything yet
user24 am i the only confused f1 fan here or
user22 outfit too 🙂↕️
user23 don't forget the makeup!
user25 NO BECAUSE SAME
user26 so we're all seeing max in the likes right
user27 apparently
user28 max verstappen being part of the yn fandom was not on my 2025 bingo card
user29 are we sure he didn't like this by accident 😭
user30 that sounds like something he would do yes
user31 i hate to break it to you but he's been at it for the past three weeks
user32 guys he liked ALL her tour posts
user33 SIMPly lovely huh?
user34 LOL BYE
user35 plot twist is plot twisting
f1 and ynofficial

❤️ 3.2M 💬 39K
liked by maxverstappen1 and others
f1 coming soon... @.ynofficial 🎤✨️
05.04.25 | 21:00 utc
#japanesegp
comments
user36 who is this and why is she on my fyp
user37 what about focusing on the race instead? just a thought
user38 and the earth kept spinning
user39 world before: 🌍 world after: 🌍
user40 no one asked 😍
user41 YN STANS HOW ARE WE FEELING ABOUT THIS
user42 f1 fan here, i have no idea who she is and i couldn't care less
user43 okay?
user44 this is exactly why f1 "fans" scare me
user45 anyways I'M SO EXCITED AAAHH
user46 me too! i missed her tour but i bought tickets to the race so now i get both... 🫠
user49 OH THIS IS GOING TO BE SO GOOD
user47 ugh you're so luckyyyyy
user48 f1 x yn fans living their best life rn
user50 face card never declines 🛐
user51 🔥🔥🔥
user52 mommy 🥵
user53 if this is an april fools' joke it's not funny
user54 PLS IT HAS TO BE REAL
user55 🕯manifesting hard🕯
user56 may our prayers be answered 🙏
user59 why is everyone in the comments so mad 💀
user57 🍀🍀🍀
user58 you're not normal
user60 fr like get a life
user61 forget everything the dutchman did it again
user62 he's so real for that
user63 DUDUDUDU HE'S DOWN BADDD
user65 SCREAMING
user64 the real question now is can suzuka handle these two goats
f1 guess we'll see 😉
ynofficial
❤️ 6.8M 💬 40.6K
liked by f1, maxverstappen1, oliviarodrigo and others
ynofficial quali now, sound check later 🥂🏁
comments
oliviarodrigo babe you're GLOWING
ynofficial it's the suzuka weather ☀️
f1 keep an eye out for our next pole sitter 👀
ynofficial on it 🫡
❤️ by maxverstappen1
user66 *insert leonardo dicaprio gif here*
user67 BRO THOUGHT WE WOULDN'T NOTICE
user68 he's so confident he'll get pole 😭
user69 he will just for her 🗣🗣🗣
user70 stay delulu folks ✊️😔
ynofficial i believe in him 🙃
user71 WHAT'S WRONG WITH THEM
user72 i'm already way too invested in their dynamic
user73 new ship to obsess over unlocked
user74 now my life is complete again 😌
user75 do you people really have nothing better to do in your free time?
user78 why is she here again?
user76 as a ferrari fan the only other available option is depression so no 🥰
user77 @.user75 we're good thanks 👍
user79 let her breathe ffs
user80 still genuinely don't understand where all the hate came from
user81 maybe it's because she has nothing to do with f1?
user82 she's not the first celebrity they've invited tho???
user83 i fear this argument is going nowhere
user84 neither is our girl but y'all aren't ready for that conversation
user85 PERIOD
f1gossippofficial
❤️ 62.7 K 💬 23.4K
f1gossippofficial max verstappen was seen attending yn's concert last night in suzuka!
comments
user86 you don't say
user87 *20 missed calls from lando*
user88 are we supposed to be surprised?
user89 yeah like any other driver so what
user90 who cares
user91 celebrating his pole position in style i see
user94 it's giving supportive boyfriend
user92 like a winner 🙂↕️
user93 he is a man of culture after all
user95 they're not even together
user98 okay but that clip of him singing along was genuinely so funny
user96 exactly
user97 a girl can dream 🤷♀️
user99 man knew the lyrics word by word
user100 where can i find it???
user101 it was on lando's stories i think(?)
user102 bro woke up and decided to expose max's ass
user103 very demure and mindful of him
user106 THE WAY HE'S LOOKING AT YN IN THE FIRST PIC HELLO ⁉️⁉️⁉️
user104 he did god's work 🙏
user105 lando is actually maxyn's number 1 supporter and no one can change my mind
user107 how do you know it's her 💀
user110 her smile omg 🥹
user108 i mean i don't think he would look at lando like that
user109 maybe charles was on stage
user111 she was congratulating max btw
user114 they're in love your honor
user112 JAIL
user113 STOP SHE WAS BLUSHING SO HARD HAHAHA
user115 i'm so not normal about them
redbullracing
❤️ 7.6M 💬 42.5K
liked by ynofficial, maxverstappen1, lando and others
redbullracing it was simply lovely meeting you @.ynofficial ❤️
comments
user116 PARENTS
user117 OMG ADMIN SHIPS IT TOO
user118 wasn’t this a lestappen fanpage
user119 💔
user120 charles crying in the corner because he's not max's main love interest anymore
redbullracing dw he's still our favorite 😉
user123 MAX LOOKS SO PROUD I CAN'T
user121 try not to ship two of the most problematic drivers on the grid: level impossible
user122 no one fangirls over them like red bull
user124 i bet the little fanboy in him was screaming
user125 max "i'm just happy to be here" verstappen
user128 idk about her outfit...
user126 they're so barbie and ken coded idc what anyone says
user127 wait i can actually see that
user129 and she doesn't know about you, problem solved 😘
user130 get her away from the paddock
user131 what did she ever do to you 😭
user134 SHE WAS THE ONE WAVING THE FLAG I'M UNWELL
user132 i say let 👏 the 👏 woman 👏 breathe 👏
user133 amen 🙌
user135 i'm gonna pretend this means she helped him win (i'm delusional)
maxverstappen1 she did
maxverstappen1 she was my lucky charm
user136 AGAIN!?
user137 i'm ending it all
user138 he's so awkward it's painful
user139 STOP DELETING THE COMMENTS AND JUST ASK HER OUT ALREADY
user140 why do i feel like he could really use some rizz classes from lando
❤️ by lando
lando @.maxverstappen1 told ya
maxverstappenfanclub
❤️ 91.3K 💬 31.2K
maxverstappenfanclub unseen photos of max and yn in suzuka 🤩🇯🇵
comments
user141 how dare instagram hide this from me for a whole minute
user142 HOW DARE RED BULL HIDE THIS FROM US IN GENERAL
user143 the disrespect 😨
user146 if you heard someone screaming that was me
user144 they wanted to keep all the wholesomeness to themselves
user145 selfish pricks
user149 do they know it's legal to talk about their feelings instead of doing whatever the fuck this is
user147 if you heard someone screaming no you didn't. i passed out
user148 only acceptable reaction
user150 BLUSHING GIGGLING KICKING MY FEET
user151 SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP
user154 THE FIRST ONE IS THE REASON I STILL BELIEVE IN LOVE
user152 there are two types of people:
user153 both valid af
user155 the eyes chico, they never lie
user158 oh he's GONE gone
user156 the physical need to have someone looking at me like that
user157 so true
user159 everyone talking about max BUT WHAT ABOUT YN
user162 you have no idea how much this means to me
user160 ❗️❗️❗️
user161 YES THANK YOU
user163 HER SMILE WHEN SHE SAW HIS CARHQYQKCZGUD
user164 and the little happy dance MY HEART
user165 they're disgusting (i love them sm)
f1wags._
❤️ 245K 💬 63.7K
f1wags._ ⁉️NEW WAG ALERT⁉️ @.maxverstappen1 and @.ynofficial spotted together after their collab shoot in suzuka!
comments
user166 hey so this is actually insane 😃
user167 I JUST OPENED INSTAGRAM WTF IS THIS
user168 WE WON
user169 SUCK IT HATERS
user170 calm tf down it doesn't mean anything
user171 suuure
user174 MAXYN NATION RISE
user172 they say denial is a river in egypt
user173 just accept the fact that we were right all along and move on 😝
user175 our moment has finally arrived
user176 i have no idea how we got here but i'm definitely not complaining
user177 we're being fed with this content
user178 I DIED DEAD
user179 when why and how did this happen
user180 i love how it goes from normal shooting to flirting to full-on tits out
user181 HAND PLACEMENT
user182 i see what you did there maximilian
user183 i'm 99.9% sure he smacked her ass one second after that picture was taken
maxverstappen1 why the 0.1%?
user186 BOOM SHAKALAKA
user184 FREAKSTAPPEN STRIKES ONCE AGAIN
user185 i can't believe he actually wrote that omg
user189 I NEED A BIG BOY GIVE ME A BIG BOYYYYY 😫❣️
user187 max or yn?
user188 both. both is good
user190 great now kiss
ynofficial
❤️ 11M 💬 86.2K
liked by maxverstappen1, oliviarodrigo, tatemcrae and others
ynofficial fast cars, faster hearts 🫶
comments
oliviarodrigo can't believe i really lost you to a m*n 🤢
tatemcrae he doesn't deserve you babe
ynofficial don't be mean🧍♀️
user191 nothing will ever top this day
tatemcrae not mean. just honest
oliviarodrigo yeah no i'm sticking to mean
user192 THIS IS A HISTORICAL MOMENT
user193 I FUCKING KNEW IT
user194 canon event
user195 it was bound to happen at one point
user196 not the couple we deserved but the one we needed
user197 YOU CAN'T JUST DROP THINGS LIKE THIS ON A RANDOM SATURDAY
user198 the ship has sailed i repeat the ship has sailed
user199 words cannot describe how i'm feeling right now
user200 i've been jumping around my room for the past five minutes
redbullracing happy for you 🥰 (charles... not so much)
user203 lando's lessons actually paid off lol
user201 admin is still stuck on lestappen and so am i
user202 maxyn defender till the day i die but lestappen is THE otp
lando you had doubts?
user203 no sir 🫡
user205 HOLY SHIT THIS WAS BETTER THAN READING A FANFIC
user204 lando yesrizz
❤️ by lando
maxverstappen1 ❤️❤️❤️
© 2025 l4ndoflove. all rights reserved.
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