#zure room

[bbqbastard]

Chili con Carne op de BBQ - Proef deze pittige smaaksensatie nu!

[goldengod-ares10]

Bro… is the team up for a locker room football jock fuck boy? I’ve suited up in full football gear and happily took the team’s large cocks in both ends and boosted morale and team bonding. I’d happily take a bros cock deep inside me and fill me up with their brotein. They called me a special “Wide Receiver” but only on the bench and locker room. My previous Coach thought it was an excellent strategy. I remember my shoulder pads and helmet were always full of sweat and jizz all the time.

Ah zure juzt dm @hercules-goldengod

if you are serious

[somethingclevermahogony]

Find the Word Tag Game

@inkovert tagged me here- thanks! Go to their page and check out some of their stuff, its great stuff!

my words were melody, leaf, smooth, and ache. As of right now I only have two WIPs, books 1 and 2 of The Testaments of the Green Sea (both of which are currently unnamed, oops) and so I will be drawing from there.

I am tagging @apolline-lucy, @illarian-rambling, @that-chibi-writer, @hallowedfury, and whoever else wants to answer, if you want to play! Your words are violet, crunch, flower, and teeth.

Melody

Istek, Dati, and Sihunu danced with a feverish intensity. It was as if, just for that moment, Istek's age and his sickness had melted away. He danced with the smooth movements of a younger man, held close both of his loves, the brave captain of the poems given new life by the melody. Dati and Sihunu leapt and spun with the grace of bounding gazelles.  Lat watched his parents from his table, a slight smile on his usually sour face. Though he would never admit it, he was quite fond of weddings. After a moment of hesitation and more than a few bowls of wine he leapt up to join his elders in their frenzied dancing. Penetinos sat near the newcomer Fasti and her son Zures, his face was pale, but the smile on his face was wide. Fasti poured the old man a bowl of wine, though in secret she added just a touch more water than may have been typical. If the old man noticed he did not say. Zures stared in wonder at the tip of Penetinos’ wizened finger as he used his sagecraft to produce a tiny blue flame, only for a moment.

Leaf (Leaves, that counts right?)

"Narul! Look! A forest!" Ninma said as she wiped the tears and snot from her face. Narul was shocked from his stupor by a wet little palm that drummed on the top of his head.  At the foot of the crested hill upon which they stood stretched a lush forest. The transition from the arid field and rock to thick greenery was almost unnatural in its suddenness.  " Did we go the wrong way?" Narul said. " Nope, northwest just like Burun said! Maybe he forgot to tell us about the forest?" Narul frowned. "I don't even understand how trees like this could be here, the ground is so dry." "Maybe the trees are like you. We should go in!" Ninma said and unconsciously dug her nails into his scalp. Her heart was pounding, and her skin was laced with goosebumps.  "Like me?" " Yeah! Like forestfolk with magic but um forest trees? Forest forest?" She said with a giggle. Narul gazed up at the massive trunks. Was she right? The whisper of the leaves beckoned him into the shadows.

Smooth

Narul ran his fingers along the smooth linen which started at his midsection and ended shortly below his knees. It had taken quite some time to assemble the outfit, and in the end after finding no actual garments which could appropriately fit him, the attendants and seamstresses had resorted to wrapping his waist with an ornate table cloth, snatched from some store room and trimmed and shaped to more closely resemble the long pleated skirts favored by Chibalan nobility. A cloak made from snowy white sheepskin, the largest they could find, was draped over his shoulders, held in place by an ornate bronze pin in shape of a snarling bear. His hair was combed and braided, bedecked with rings of Korithian silver and beads of  Shamabalan agate and Makoran Amber. The attendants had even tried to shove a signet ring onto one of his fingers, an endevor which would ultimately prove to be in vain. Failing at this, and the application of other more common jewelry, they took to him with bowls of a strong smelling paste, dying his skin with shades of rich red and earthy brown, covering his arms, hands, and chest with wave-like patterns.

Ache

"...I curse you Narul. May you live amongst those vile creatures for a thousand years. May you bear witness to countless atrocities, to every abomination to slither forth from the minds of humans. May you see cities crumble and families wither! May your fleeting happiness be drowned in the filth of the ages! And when time finally catches you, when the names of all who you loved have been wiped clean from your decayed mind by the hands of time, when your petty morals have been smashed by the depravity of man, may you remember my offer. May you remember the kindness I extended. May you mourn your choice. You will die alone, unloved, forgotten, a relic, a lonesome fool who bet his harvest on a diseased field! Enjoy your fleeting time with these humans, but know that when that girl is an old woman, when her body rages against her, when her bones ache, you will not understand her plight, and she will hate you for it. Every love you will ever feel, will end with sorrow and hatred. And when I return to enact my justice for the depravity of your mothers kin, you will receive no kind words from me! This was your choice, Narul. Enjoy it.”

[lower-management]

Another torture method: stones. A beach full of stones. And it‘s hot. You have to go over these hot stones to get to the water. Which is COLD. That is hard!

//I went swimming in the cold water today and I would rather stay in it for 1 hour than go over these stones (they weren‘t hot but that soesn‘t matter lol they were painful enough)for 1 minute ngl

Pretty zure we have a room where we cook people alive and then zubmerge them into ice cold water. A clazzic, alwayz workz out great.

[garblixdligzoog]

//CW: Psychotic autism stuff. (Yes I'm autistic.)

TRANZCRIPT LOG 08-12-22:

Subject(z): Frank "Zpud" ?̷͖̭͊̅̍̂̽͗̾̓̊̀̽̈͘̕#̴͍͕̞͍̦̜̣̐̾͆̈́͋̈̆͌̈̉͗̚̕͝!̶̛͖̱̹̹̾̐͒͘͠?̵̪̘̺͎̪̫̮͙̼̻͇̣̜̈͛͐̂̈́̎̓̋̋̋͂̓̎̐̔̊͝$̶̢̨̧͇̞͔̮͈͕̖̟̮͙̳̲̈́̔̀́̽͘͘͠(̷̥̣̗̞͐̿̒̅̏̑̾͐̍̃̽̿̿͑̕͝#̷̧̡̬̫̺̭̪̱̞̺̹̥͙̮̃̏̆̿͑̉̅̐̎͛͘

Operator(z): Gnarpy, Dr. Zlazik, Garblix Dligzoog

Witnezzez: M.L.z Zoigzar and Troz.

[FOR MAIN LEADERZ' EYEZ ONLY]

(8:04 A.M.)

[Gnarpy enterz room with Dr. Zlazik. Garby iz waiting in the operating room.]

Gnarpy: Uugh... Zeebloing bloodz everywhere... Hurk...

Zlazik: Do not worry about zuch thingz, gnarpy... Our newezt co-leader to-be needz zome guidance!

Garblix Dligzoog: Huh...? Who, me?!

Zlazik: Yez, you, blue zoldier! What iz your name?

Garblix Dligzoog: Uhhm... Garblix Dligzoog... but everyone callz me garby...

Gnarpy: GHAHAHAHAAA! WHAT KIND OF GNARPIAN NAME IZ THAT?! I'M JUZT GONNA CALL YOU GARBAGE!

[Gnarpy pointz and laughs at Garblix Dligzoog. However, Zlazik zlaps the back of xis head.]

Gnarpy: OWH! WHAT WAZ THAT FOR, YOU ZEEBLOING!?

Zlazik: BEHAVE YOURZELF, YOUR BLOOD ZTATUZ MAY GIVE YOU A FREE ROLE AZ A MAIN LEADER, YOU ZOULD ACT LIKE ONE!

[Zlazik iz berating gnarpy, while Garblix Dligzoog peeks behind the curtain. There iz an earthling labeled "Frank".]

Garblix Dligzoog: Iz... Iz thiz the earthling we're gonna be working on?"

[Troz appears behind garby, putting xis paw on xis shoulder.]

Troz: Why yez, little one... You and Gnarpy will have a paw in thiz!

Garblix Dligzoog: What...? Me?! But I'm not a co-leader yet! I don't even have anything done in medical licenzing!

Troz: We do not care if you have that, thiz iz an experimental procedure. We begin at 10! No later than thatz, mlorp!

(9:58 A.M.)

[Garblix, Gnarpy and Zlazik are provided tools for the operation. While Gnarpy and Zlazik are confident, Garby looks terrified.]

Zlazik: ...Zomething on your mind, Garby?

Garblix Dligzoog: Y-yez... Iz the patient gonna be under? I don't want him to feel the pain...

Zlazik: ....Yez... Yez, he'z gonna be out... I promise...

[At the operating theatre, Troz zcoffed at annoyance.]

Troz: Pah... What a foolizh gnarpian, why waz he elected az a new co-leader?!

Zoigzar: Didn't you read xis file?... I don't want to mention it while the tranzcriptz are running. ...It'z related to INCIDENT ZERO.

Troz: You mean that zeebloing who maz-

[Troz zaps Zoigzar in aggression and fear.]

Troz: ZHUT IT! If thiz getz out to the public, there WILL be a rebellion! And you know what happenz during rebellionz?!

Zoigzar: ...The leaderz get overthrown!?

Troz: Including uz, yez! Look down there, the human iz waiting for the pain...

[The curtainz draw back for Frank, revealing the Gnarpianz ready to experiment.]

Frank: O-oh god no! Aliens! They're real! And they're... Space cats?!

Gnarpy: ZHUT UP!

[Gnarpy proceeds to knock Frank in the head with the back of a drill.]

Zlazik: Zeebloing, I am going to zay thiz once. Tell uz who thiz... "Demon" iz, and we will make zure your experimentation iz painlezz.

Frank: What demon?! I don't know what you're talking about! L-let me go!

Gnarpy: Now I'm gonna zay it thiz way... I could crack your zkull open, zee each neuron that iz in your brain, picking them out ONE BY ONE UNTIL WE FIND THAT ZPECIFIC MEMORY! Ohh... And how about I zew your eyez to your armz, and zplit the zkin off your muzcle?

Garby: z-ztop...

Zlazik: I remember you zaying zomething about a "rock" when xe firzt abducted you yezterday. Brain zcanz zhowed a... hideouz looking creature.

Gnarpy: And that zorplobo zhadow... WHAT OF THAT THING, HUH!?

Frank: I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN! I CAN'T SAY WHAT I CAN'T DESCRIBE!

[Garblix appears more diztrezzed, clinging onto xis earz.]

Gnarpy: Maybe if you won't zpeak, I'll even get that earthling female, who waz zhe called? ZARAH?!

Garblix Dligzoog: Z-ZTOP ZAYING THAT ZTUFF!!

[The room falls zilent, with Gnarpy, the main leaderz, and Zlazik looking at xim.]

Garblix Dligzoog: CAN'T YOU ZEE HE'Z DIZTREZZED?! YOU'VE ABDUCTED XIM FROM XIS OWN HOME PLANET, A-AND HE'Z ZCARED! YOU ZHOULDN'T BE DOING THIZ, WE ZHOULDN'T BE DOING THIZ! IT'Z AGAINZT EVERYTHING GNARPIANZ WERE!

[...Gnarpy, zlazik and the main leaders all burst into laughter.]

Gnarpy: ZZHHAHAHAHAAA! OF COURZE YOU WOULD ZAY THAT! THAT'Z THE ZLEEBIEZT THING I'VE EVER HEARD! BY THE EMPEROR, I'M GONNA DIEE!!!

[Gnarpy seems to be tearing up, facial recognition cannot be calculated. Tears of joy or tearz of zadness??]

Troz: GNHFFEHHEEHEEH! How about we make XIM operate on the zeebloing!? Pleaze! I want to zee xis face when hiz bonez zplit at the atomz!

Garblix Dligzoog: N-NO PLEAZE! NOT ME!! NOT WHILE HE'Z AWAKE!!

Gnarpy: Welp, xe zaid it, not me! Xe'z the main leader! Alright, time to zhow uz your cutting zkillz! I'll help you get ztarted!

[Gnarpy proceeds to grab a zcalpel, placing it in garblix'z paw.]

Garblix Dligzoog: Pleaze forgive me, ztrange earthling...

[The experimentation goez underway, Garblix lookz very diztrezzed while Gnarpy and The main leaderz laugh. Zlazik however, feelz bad for Garby. The experimentation and screaming went on for twenty hourz, blood haz covered the wallz and floor, along with Gnarpy and Garblix. Frank left disfigured by the experiment.]

Garblix Dligzoog: I feel... zo violated... all againzt my will...

Gnarpy: Lookz like we need the memory wipe for thiz one, or zhould we take out the trazh...?

Zlazik: ...I'll get the brainzcrubber.

[END OF TRANSCRIPT.]

[drunkenorctavern]

Human Reader x Orc Guardsman MM CW: Watersports, Musk, Dubcon, Alcohol.

You were the spitting image of the humble human farmer. You payed your dues, you harvested your crop, and you put down your drinks. You were just a humble, god-fearing farmer, with not a single uncouth desire, until tonight. You were just walking back from a night at the town pub. Well, stumbling more like. The issue was that you really needed to take a fat piss, but it was a long walk to your outhouse, and you'd need to pay for a room to use the inn's waste buckets.

The inebriation was making it harder and harder to stand up straight, much less get all the way back home. your bladder felt like it was gonna burst any second. Fuckin' A. You stopped, holding your hands to your crotch trying to keep it in, and looked around sheepishly. The crusty alleyway to your left looked awfully appealing right now. It already reeked anyway, so what was a few droplets to the pond.

You couldn't take it anymore. Waddling awkwardly into the alleyway, and making sure you weren't seen, you pulled down your pants and breeches at the same time. The night breeze was soothing on your loins as you let loose. All the ale you drowned your gullet with spilled out onto the old wattle and dob. It felt good to let loose after a night of drinks with the lads, so good you didn't notice the lantern light making it's way closer to you with a loud stomp.

"Aye, *hic* wut do you t'ink yer' doin'?" a low commanding voice boomed.

Shit. The hose dried up pretty quick after he heard that. In a drunken stupor to get your clothes back on, you fell flat on your ass into your own piss puddle. Cold brickwork stuck to your behind as the voice stumbled closer. Worst case scenario. A stocky, orc guardsmen of considerable size stumbled over to you. He didn't stop until you were between his thick trunk like legs looking up at him. Even if you were standing up, he would've towered over you by at least two heads. He was donned in a dark colored gambeson, leather boots, and the signature studded helmet that all the town guard wore.

There was just one thing missing, the orc wasn't wearing pants. under his gambeson, he was in nothing but a dirty burlap loincloth. You had an excellent view of everything that went on under there. The abused, stained fabric barely covered anything at all. It cupped the orc's sizable manhood, but his balls practically spilled out the sides, and the thinner parts got bunched up in his sweaty crack.

"Tha's uhhhh, *hic* uhhh, pubic ecks-pose-zure" The orc sounded it out like he wasn't sure how it was pronounced, he clearly was a couple tankards in himself, "Lis'en mate, *hic* if I whipped ou' mah pecker as much as I wanted to, I'd lose muh johb."

You sputtered out an excuse of just needing to relieve yourself, as you struggled to just pull your pants up. Unfortunately for you, it seems the sleazy orc misinterpreted what you meant entirely. Though your alcohol marinated brain hasn't yet caught up.

"Aye, mmmmh, well, *hic* I'm in a similar spoht muhself," The orc admitted, scratching his large, stubbled chin as the rusty cogs of his brain turned. Suddenly, something seemed to click in his head, as if struck by a revelation. He looked down at you hungrily, "I've not gut some relief since early dis mornin'"

"U'll tell yuh wut, youse gotta purty face" the orc propositioned you, "how aboot we make uh deal..."

You looked up hopefully at the orc, the sooner you could make it home, the sooner you could be in bed and sleep off the alcohol that wracked your senses, and leave this shamful moment behind you. You nodded eagerly.

"Well, uh ain't seen nuttin', *hic* nuttin' at all," The orc's voice deepened, and he started undoing the buckles of his tunic, "All yuh gotta do, is help muh empty muh nads."

Your nodding slowed as you stared in disbelief and apprehension. Weighing the options in your head you looked to the side, trying to find a way to weasle out of this situation you found yourself in. In the deeper parts of your psyche, you always wanted something like this to happen to you, but...

"C'mon lad, *hic* I really need it, my nads are aboot to burst," The orc whined desperately. His loincloth was starting to get tight, if it was ill fitting before, it looked downright silly now.

"Nuh'n has tuh know."

You've always had fantasies about this kind of thing in the back of your mind, being used by a big stinky orc. This was the kinda thing they couldn't torture out of someone, but the buzz of the ale made this much easier to stomach. If anyone found out, you could just say you were drunk off your ass, or forced, maybe both. Sitting up, and getting your face close to the goal, you've decided you already made up your mind.

The orc put his hand on your head appreciatively, "Der we go, *hic* Aye knews yuhd come aroond."

Your face was pushed into his now hardened tent. His big green belly rested on your head. The first thing that struck you was the odor. It kicked you in the teeth like a wild horse. The ripe onion smell of old sweat burned the hairs out of your nose, and you were deeply ashamed of how hard it made you. Your body breathed it in without your consent, letting the smell make you dizzy.

"Das it lad, take it all in, huvn't washed dis ting in weeks."

The orc didn't protest at all when you nervously opened your mouth and licked the length of the strained fabric, quite the opposite in fact, he gave an appreciative moan. You'd expected the burlap to dry your mouth out, but thankfully, or unfortunately the entire thing was soaking wet with sweat and god knows what else. All your inhibitions vanished now, drunker than ever thought possible. In that moment you'd swear that if the bar keep handed you a tankard of orcish ball sweat, you'd lap it up like a thirsty dog. What was wrong with you?

You lifted yourself up, and gave the orc's cock head an experimental suckle. To your surprise, the orc was already leaking thick pre, which you eagerly drank through his loincloth. The orc was bucking into your ministrations, groaning and cussing without restraint, you almost felt proud. It was only a matter of time before the orc couldn't take it anymore.

"Ughhhh, yer so gud 'umie, yuh were born tuh nurse peckers, fuuuck," The orc's voice was getting strained, "I'm gittin' close, oooh fuck muh."

The orc gaurdsman was getting himself out of breath. He wasn't even bothering with your mouth anymore, just grinding against your entire face like a horse and a particular smooth rock. Thrusts shortening and getting more desperate until eventually he erupted right through his undies. He gave few final thrusts, smearing rancid seed over your face. Your own dick twitched as it blew your load all over the masoned road as well. It was one of the hardest nuts you've ever had, handsfree as well, humiliating.

"Fuuuuck, guhd lad," the orc guardsman grinned sleazily down at his new plaything, "Dat was guhd work ya did 'umie, like nuh'n else, yer off da hook"

You both stared at each other contemplatively, and you both knew it wasn't quite over, even as the orc became flaccid.

"Actually, *hic* I need 'nuther favor," the orc licked his tusks, "I need tuh piss real bad."

You were already made into a whore by this sleazy orc. Turns out you were willing to do anything with a few tankards in your system and a couple whiffs of orc musk. You desperately pulled the orc's loincloth to the side. To your surprise, it was even bigger than it looked when it was restrained by that damnable piece of burlap. Even flaccid it was almost the size of your forearm. It looked like a giant green cucumber.

The orc pushed you towards his cock, and you wasted no time wrapping your hand around the base of his pecker, and slipping your tongue under his loose foreskin. You aimed the orc's dickhole straight into your mouth, waiting for your prize, and he delivered.

Hot and salty orc piss shot down your throat, you choked at first, but soon you learned to relax and accept it straight into your stomach. It was almost too much, your belly was getting filled up at an alarming rate. Soon after nearly a full minute, the orc's faucet slowed down to a few dribbles. He pulled out, and smacked his cock against your lips to get the remaining droplets off the tip. Finally satisfied, the sleazy orc helped you back unto your feet.

"Guhd lad, *hic* now dunnae let muh catch yuh here again," The orc looked behind him, before turning back and whispering "Unless yuh wanna be muh whore again, wouldn't mind doin' that again wuhd yuh?"

You nodded feverishly. Maybe your head wasn't in the right place right this second, but you'd rather die than not get to suck orc cock again. The orc let you go, letting the wall support you instead. Your legs were like jelly, and you could barely stand up straight. Soon you found out why the orc let you go so soon. He reached under his gambison, undid his loincloth, and handed it to you by way of chucking it onto your face with a wet slap. The musky undergarments hung off your nose.

"Consider it uh partin' gift, have a noice night 'umie."

With that, the orc gaurdsmen was off, stumbling out of the alleyway, letting you catch a glimpse of his hairy green ass as he walked away. You were left violated, covered in bodily fluids, pants down, unwashed underwear hanging off of your face, and you wanted nothing more than to do it all over again.

[onnodig-genederlands]

"Ra ra Rasputin nog iets nog iets zure room"

"Post zonder labels?

Labels toevoegen aan je post helpt mensen om het te vinden

[ post ] [ voeg labels toe ]"

"Nee, nee, ik heb vertrouwen in deze helse site. Dit zal zijn doelgroep wanneer het zover is"

ra ra rasputin something something sour cream

[the-flys-buzz]

puts both you and caleb into a room

neither of you are free till we let you out 🥰

HELLO????? MY DAD. MY DADS ARE GONNA BE WORRIED ABOUT ME????? I DONT HAVE TIME TO BE TRAPPED WITH A ROTTING FLOWER

“OHHHH, COME ON! ZURE YOU DO! ITZ NOT LIKE ANYTHING BAD WILL POZZIBLY HAPPEN!”

Caleb is standing really close to him.

[recipecollector-cor]

Gepofte Aardappelen met Salami en Groenten uit de Airfryer

Gepofte Aardappelen met Salami en Groenten uit de Airfryer Geniet van deze heerlijke gepofte aardappelen uit de airfryer, gevuld met een smaakvolle mix van salami, rode paprika, doperwten en zure room. Perfect als hoofdgerecht of bijgerecht, en gemakkelijk aan te passen met je favoriete kruiden en groenten. - airfryer - kom - keukenpapier - snijplank - mes - 1 el zure room - 1 el verse kruiden zoals bieslook (dragon of peterselie (optioneel)) - 100 g doperwten (vers of diepvries) - ½ rode paprika - 6 tot 8 plakken salami of chorizo - 6 aardappelen - Peper en zout (pezo) - 1 rode ui of 2 lente-uitjes - Verwarm de airfryer voor op 200 graden Celsius. - Maak de buitenkant van de ongeschilde aardappelen goed schoon en droog ze met keukenpapier. - Plaats de aardappelen in het mandje van de airfryer en bak ze gedurende 25 minuten totdat ze gaar zijn. - Snipper ondertussen de ui en snijd de salami en rode paprika in hapklare stukjes. - Kook de doperwten enkele minuten gaar, spoel ze af met koud water, laat uitlekken, en zet ze weg. - Als de aardappelen gaar zijn, laat ze afkoelen totdat ze hanteerbaar zijn. - Snijd de bovenkant van elke aardappel af en schep de kruimige binnenkant voorzichtig in een kom. - Meng de zure room met de aardappelkruim, en voeg de gesneden salami, paprika, doperwten en verse kruiden toe. - Breng op smaak met peper en zout. - Vul de gepofte aardappelen met het mengsel en serveer ze direct. Combineer met een lichte rode wijn zoals een Pinot Noir of een koele witte wijn zoals een Sauvignon Blanc. Airfryer, Bijgerecht, GroentenInternationaalGlutenvrij Read the full article

[autisticsuggestion]

van welk gerecht zijn bieten bouillon en zure room ingrediënten

wiens gerecht ingrediënten zijn van bietenbouillon en zure room Borsjt is een populaire zure soep in Oost-Europa en Noord-Azië. In het Engels wordt het woord “borsjt” vaak geassocieerd met een verscheidenheid aan soepen van Oekraïense oorsprong, gemaakt met rode biet als een van de hoofdingrediënten, wat het gerecht zijn kenmerkende rode kleur geeft. Borsjt wordt vaak in het Engels geschreven en…

[bbqbastard]

Zoete aardappel met Mole en authentiek gerookte kip

[mewos-laptop]

I'm a fucking war criminal I would zurely [surely] HOPE Earthlingz [Earthlings] would have enough room in their zkullz [skulls] to not baby me... 3:<

regretevator fans try not to baby gnarpy challenge (impossible🤯🤯🤯

.

[0781jens-blog]

Goedemorgen allemaal, deze morgen een heerlijk duits ontbijt gemaakt! Heerlijke omelet met zure room en kaas, geserveerd met stukjes zwartewoud ham, jonge sla, eiffeler brood en een heerlijk kopje koffie. 🥚🥚🥚☕️☕️☕️🇩🇪🇩🇪🇩🇪 https://www.instagram.com/p/ClxljZNDn6N/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[heartyearning]

can’t stand the fact that our grocery stores r being overrun by dutch people CAN’T HAVE SHIT IN [MYCITY] ben naar de ah gegaan want morgen is het de verjaardag v een vriendin in ik ging taart maken met een room sausje hè dus ik naar de winkel met m’n domme kop er van uitgaand dat we in VLAAAANDEREN ZIJN (geen vlaams nationalist maar jeweetwel ik zit gewoon int vlaams na te denken) en er staan geen potjes opkloproom meer maar ernaast staan gewoon potjes créme fraiche dus ik denk bij mezelf van ok idk waarom er een verschil in zit maar ok da’s tzelfde maar dan int frans dus da nemen we maar mee dan hè JA NIET DUS HÈ. ZURE ROOM. IN *MIJN* CHOCOLADETAART? KOMT MEER VOOR DAN JE DENKT

[my2phetaliaheadcanons]

Bonding

I thought I would do a small series where the 1ps and 2ps are forced to interact. 

This one is between the two Frances. Enjoy!

The rain pelted and reverberated off the roof creating a calming noise within the dark home. The darkness cradled the calming atmosphere, and the smell of smoke wafted around. A lone man in his late twenties sat at a table in a dark kitchen, a cigarette hung limp from his lips. His clothing was ruffled, and his hair looked greasy from neglect. He looked dazed and watched the rain from a small window above his steel gray sink.

Knock, knock

A groan rose from François as his trance was broken. He stood up, put out the cigarette and pushed the chestnut chair back. He ambled slowly, almost like he was being led to his execution. The person at the door knocked again, this time with more fervor and for longer.

Annoyance had started to build within François, and the rapid knocking mixed with the rain meant whoever was outside was also annoyed. Opening the worn, once white door François saw himself. Well, not quite. This look-a-like was his 1p, Francis. He took better care of himself, no scruff, golden blond, and clean hair. Bright blue eyes that usually held hope for the world now looked frustrated. He was also very drenched.

“François, vhat took you so long?!”

A grunt and a shrug were François’ only answer. Francis’ face turned shocked for a second before he shivered and tried to force his way inside.  His attempt was in vain because François denied him by lifting his arm to the door frame.

“Vell are you going to let me in? I am zoaked like zoap.”

“Vhy should I let you in, Francis?”

François  watched as Francis’ head dropped and a sigh came from his throat.

“’Ave you forgotten? Ve are zupposed to meet, our boss even made it an official meeting for us. You even picked today.”

François rolled his eyes at this, he didn’t forget. He just didn’t care. Of course, he expected his 1p to follow orders. 1ps usually did. This was one reason 1ps and 2ps never get along. Past forced attempts usually didn’t end well so why try to force it. Sure, François would admit that he and Francis didn’t actively attempt to kill each other, but the last time something like this occurred it was with the Americas, and according to rumors that ended in bloodshed.  

François sidestepped with a look of irritation and slowly stalked back into the darkness. Francis perked up like a golden puppy and cautiously followed.

With his 1p in the home, François lazily flicked on a light and ambled toward his kitchen. It was small, and the white appliances appeared more yellow from age. The dark table, is where François found himself sitting. He didn’t have much a choice but to wait on Francis.

Francis took his time to walk into the kitchen. François could see his shadow, his 1p’s posture and cautious pacing gave away the paranoia he felt around the 2p. François’ irritation grew at that. This was his home, and no one but him stepped inside. Was his 1p expecting to be ambushed or killed?

“Vould you zit, so we get this meeting done and over vith?”

Francis jumped in surprise and moved quickly to the table. He pulled out the chair and sat. François noticed his nervous hands fidgeting and playing with his hair.

He sighed through his nose and lit another cigarette. François hoped the nicotine would help quell his annoyance.

“So vhat are ve supposed to be talking about again?”

The response was not what François expected.

“Ve are supposed to be bonding.”

Bonding. Really, his boss wanted him to bond with his sissy of a 1p. The thought was almost enough for him to want to break out the wine, but that would be a waste if he had to share it with his 1p.

Though François reasoned that the sooner he did something with Francis, the sooner he could kick him out. The gloomy Frenchman racked his brain. What could they do? He and Francis didn’t have much in common, as far as he paid attention to that is.

A voice and shuffling sounds of movements interrupted his thoughts.

“I know you like gambling. Ve could play Rummy.”

François gave it a thought as he watched Francis pull a deck of cards from his pants pocket. Funny enough, he had recently learned that game from Allen. Who knows maybe if he could convince Francis to agree to some higher stakes, he could get something good out of it.

“Zure.”

The cards were dealt and since each man knew the game. François got his wish, and they gambled. Francis won some, and François won others. A couple of hours passed and just like François wanted, he started to stack the odds in the 1p’s favor. Now would be a good time to strike.  

“’Ow about ve up the ztakes even more?”

Francis’ ears perked while he shuffled the cards.

“Vhat kind of ztakes?”

“You know, maybe the lozer doing the winner’z papervork for about a month?”

The 2p watched as his 1p thought it over. The furrowing of his eyebrows, the twitches of his lips caused François to show a small smirk.

“Alright, vhy not.”

This is was what would make this damn bonding worth it.  Getting out of his paperwork and forcing his 1p to read about what he does. This was going to be delicious, François thought as he licked his lips.

Once again, the cards were dealt. This time Francis looked more determined than he had when they started, while François looked like a lion with a guaranteed kill.

The only sound in the room was the movement of cards, it was that satisfying sound of matches being placed down on the table. Francis had two sets of match and François only had one. Having started with ten cards, both parties knew that this would be the deciding move.

It was François’s turn and his smirk uncoiled like a snake into a bigger and cocky version.

“It’z a z’ame that you thought you ‘ad a chance.”

Reaching over, François plucked the three from the discard pile and laid down his cards. There were two sets. One being a run of King down to Jack and the other set being of two through five.

François wanted to laugh as Francis gasped. The look on his face was like a child having his birthday cake fall on the floor before he had a taste. Francis quickly composed himself, having his features become more tired and looking annoyed.

François definitely benefitted from this bonding time.

”I guess you von. I am a man of my word and 'opefully, the paperwork von't be too graphic.”

He raised his hand to François. François returned to a stoic face, and he shook the hand. Both men stood as this shaking occurred. Once the handshake broke Francis leaned over to pick his cards up. François moved back and waited for Francis to finish putting the cards.

With cards in box and both men standing, they walked back down the long hallway. In what felt like forever, François and Francis finally made it to the front door.

“Goodbye mon 2p. I will call and let them know about the paperwork change.”

And with that, the bright and happy Frenchman left. Leaving François to watch him leave into the rain. With a shake of his head, the grumpy Frenchman closed his door.

The soft click signaled that he was alone again. As much as he did not like his 1p, at least there was always something he could gain from their interactions. Maybe next time, he could take his house.

[pokefreaks-resurrection]

"That you are. Just allow me to lock up. You should know this room is soundproofed, so we don't need to worry." Zure assured her after matching his shark like predatory gaze with hers only to pat her head.

After walking away to lock the door, having the curtain already shut, he walked up to her, hanging up his coar. "So, any limits?"

Open RP Starter: Quarterly Reviews

[This is a modern/non-Remnant AU—Neo does not have her Semblance here and was not Roman’s former partner.]

“Neo Politani? Could I see you in my office?”

The voice called out from the other end of the floor, and Neo popped up in her seat in surprise. The curvaceous cutie glanced over the top divider of her cubicle—a difficult task for the four-and-a-half-foot tall office worker—locking eyes with her boss in their personal office near the front of the room. The serious expression catching her off-guard.

Swallowing hard, Neo slipped off her seat and began making the long walk up to the front of the room, feeling the eyes of the rest of her coworkers following her. She tried to show confidence—head held high and hips swaying with each step she took—but on the inside her heart was hammering in her chest. She was a great worker, if a bit poorly behaved, so she had no idea what this sudden meeting could be.