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niqhtlord01 · 14 days ago

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Interviews with the Mythical

Human Reporter: What do you mean you invented Christmas?

Vampire: I mean just that, we invented the entire thing up.

Human Reporter: But we have documents, records of-

Vampire: All fabricated during the 3rd century as you call it.

Human Reporter: But why would you do that?

Vampire: Long term plan to subvert the day Christ was born.

Vampire: We gathered and felt that if we could slowly subvert the holiday with something less Christian we could dilute the faithful.

Vampire: Eventually we took a step back and you humans corporatized the holiday all by yourself to the point many associate it with our “Saint Nic” over that zombie boy Jesus.

Human Reporter: How would you say that has played out?

Vampire: I watched a woman throw a child like a football all to get the last Christmas day sale Toaster.

Vampire: It’s going swimmingly. ------------------------

Shape shifter: Oh yes I knew him.

Human Reporter: You knew Vincent Van Gogh?

Shape Shifter: This will be a short interview if you continue to question everything I say.

Human Reporter: I was just surprised since you look so young.

Shape Shifter: Such things as aging function differently for us.

Shape Shifter: We appear old because we wish to feel the ravages of time.

Shaper Shifter: We appear young because we wish to bask in the depravities of youth.

Human Reporter: So are you immortal like vampires?

Shaper Shifter: *scoffs

Shape Shifter: I wish they would stop referring to themselves like that; the arrogant bastards.

Shaper Shifter: Vampires age slowly, but they age all the same; and I’ve yet to meet one that didn’t find a stake through the heart a grievous inconvenience.

Human Reporter: You are dodging the question.

Shape Shifter: Because I don’t have an answer.

Shape Shifter: The only way I imagine I can die is if I change into something dead, but I have no idea what that feels like so in the back of my mind there will always be a part of me alive meaning I am never really dead.

Human Reporter: Sounds like a maddening state.

Shape Shifter: Gogh said the same thing before he asked to paint me in my natural state.

Human Reporter: Really? What was it like being in one of his paintings?

Shape Shifter: Let’s just say he wasn’t always paranoid. ---------------------------

Human Reporter: So you take being a wolf seriously.

Werewolf: So?

Human Reporter: I mean, really seriously.

Werewolf: What kind of stupid question is that?

Werewolf: You take being human pretty seriously for being a human.

Human Reporter: But that’s just it, you are half wolf and half human; but your more animalistic side seems to take more precedent.

Werewolf: *Snarls

Human Reporter: I mean from what we do know you still form packs and groups with other werewolves even when in human form, you organize yourself like a pack being led by an alpha, etc.

Werewolf: I see what you’re getting at.

Werewolf: The animal tendencies are more…overpowering than human ones.

Human Reporter: Aren’t they the same?

Werewolf: No, they’re not.

Human Reporter: Could you elaborate?

Werewolf: Do you want to leave with your head?

Human Reporter: Yes.

Werewolf: Than this interview is over. ----------------

Human Reporter: Do you have a moment for an interview?

Sphinx: Only if you answer my riddle.

Sphinx: What walks on-

Human Reporter: The answer is man.

Sphinx: ……

Sphinx: I haven’t even finished.

Human Reporter: I mean…..it’s not exactly a secret riddle.

Sphinx: But how can you possibly know it?

Human Reporter: Oedipus recorded the answer after he solved it.

Sphinx: *Defeated sigh

Sphinx: I knew I should have just killed that little man.

Sphinx: What else did he write?

Human Reporter: That after he solved the riddle you were so distraught you flung yourself into the sea to commit suicide.

Sphinx: That lying sack of shit! --------------------

Human Reporter: So does your pumpkin rot and you need to collect new ones or is it just eternally ripe?

Headless Horseman: Through the pumpkin That is what you are opening with?

Human Reporter: Well I just wonder how that thing could be still fresh after almost 300 years.

Headless Horseman: *Tilts neck down to show severed neck muscles and spine

Headless Horseman: None of this is freaking you out?

Human Reporter: If I’m being truthful I did interview a zombie before meeting you and they also were missing a substantial amount of flesh.

Headless Horseman: Did you just fucking compare me to a zombie!?!

Human Report: You technically are undead in a sense.

Headless Horseman: They made a bloody movie about me! It had Johnny Depp and I was played by Christopher Walken!

Headless Horseman: They made a tv show about me!

Human Reporter: With respect they’ve made more shows about zombies.

Headless Horseman: *Storms off and kicks over a stack of boxes while swearing in german ----------------

Human Reporter: Thank you for your time.

Leprechaun: Pay my fee, lest I shall flee.

Human Reporter: *Reaches into pocket and tosses three gold coins.

Leprechaun: *Catches coins, takes a bite on each, then pockets them.

Human Reporter: You’re the only creature I’ve met that’s actually charged for an interview.

Leprechaun: Fools and half-wits waste fortunes with words said free, but I’m neither lest I’m paid handsomely.

Human Reporter: Bit of a rhyming theme going on I see; very poetic.

Leprechaun: Words and songs are my crafts by trade, but none still finer than my cobbler days.

Human Reporter: What makes Leprechaun gold more special than normal gold?

Leprechaun: A simple question gets a simple answer.

Leprechaun: No gold is finer than the ones I gather.

Leprechaun: Through trade and trick I make my wealth, and by deceit and death I keep it still.

Human Reporter: You’re saying you’ve had to kill to protect your gold?

Leprechaun: The penance is clear, there’s no debate.

Leprechaun: You take my gold, I take your life. ------------

Human Reporter: What is it like to be the neck tie for a god?

Nag Vasuki: You would mock an immortal being?

Human Reporter: Do you not coil yourself around the neck of the literal god of destruction?

Nag Vasuki: I do.

Human Report: Then that makes you a neck tie.

Nag Vasuki: *Lunges across table and bites reporter in the neck, delivering a lethal amount of poison before storming off to get a bagel. ---------------

Human Reporter: Why do you eat children?

Baba Yaga: Why does a raging river drown those lost within its grasp?

Human Reporter: Because a river is part of nature.

Baba Yaga: As am I.

Baba Yaga: There is nothing more unforgiving and unrelenting than that of nature, and in their youthful bliss many young find themselves lost within its tangled woods of thorn and wood.

Baba Yaga: I, like nature, stand at the gates of great change that children must face; be it for great joy or misery.

Human Reporter: Are you saying you eat children because they refused to adapt?

Baba Yaga: *chuckles

Baba Yaga: Only the unlucky ones. -------------------

Human Reporter: in hazmat suit Thank you for the interview.

Nuckelavee: Through the hanging mouth of a horse and its rider man Save your false gratitude.

Nuckelavee: I seek neither your accolades nor your ponderous questioning.

Human Reporter: Then why did you come at all?

Nuckelavee: For all of humanity to know that their end will soon be at hand, and it will be by my machinations shall you fall.

Human Reporter: Forgive me but you remind me of the four horseman.

Nuckelavee: *laughs

Nuckelavee: Ah yes, the fear of the southerners was so rich when they first laid eyes on me.

Nuckelavee: They had come to preach the word of their god, so it was only fitting I made them scream out to their savior as I peeled the flesh from their bones. The look of abandonment they gave was so amusing I allowed the last of them passage back to their stone temples.

Nuckelavee: So wrought with horror they were that when they scampered back their minds could not conceive such malevolence as a singular being.

Human Reporter: So you are claiming to be the inspiration for the four horsemen?

Nuckelavee: There can be no other.

Human Reporter: If that was the case are you not upset you were depicted as such?

Nuckelavee: In the end I shall feast on you all; what mind have I to care for such trivialities?

#humans are weird #story #writing #original writing #niqhtlord01 #funny #mythology #mythical #lore #fantasy

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lucifersgirl · 4 months ago

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Some Halloween legends say that demons will walk among people.

Imagine Reader meeting Lucifer Morningstar on Halloween night; he’s so alluring in the midst of everyone in their costumes.

“I like your ringmaster costume. It stands out.”

He grins. All of his teeth look so sharp in the moonlight. Was it part of his costume?

“So does your Devil costume.”

“Thank you. I love Halloween.”

(Could be SFW or NSFW if you want.)

I LOVE THIS!! Keep these amazing requests coming, my friends!! Enjoy!!

Happy Sinful Sunday by the way ;)

Halloween

⚠️WARNING⚠️ - THIS WRITING CONTAINS EXPLICIT CONTENT. SMUT BELOW. MDNI.

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As you opened the door to the party, the smell of cheap perfume, booze and cigarettes came rushing to your nose. Vampires, werewolves and other various creatures roamed around the room, dancing and laughing. You yourself were dressed as a devil. Your short dress was swaying as you walked to the bar, faux tail bouncing and horned headband sitting proudly atop your head.

“What can I get you, ma’am?” The bartender, who was dressed as a zombie, asked you.

You ordered your usual and, after you received it, took a long sip.

A man walked up to the bar and took a seat beside you. “I’ll have whatever she’s having,” he said.

The bartender nodded and walked off.

“I like your ringmaster costume. It stands out,” you complimented him.

He grinned. All of his teeth looked so sharp in the moonlight. Was it part of his costume?

“So does your Devil costume,” he nodded at your attire.

“Thank you. I love Halloween.” You took another sip of your drink, your mind relaxing as the alcohol kicked in. “What’s your name?” You asked curiously.

He smiled that toothy smile of his again. “Lucifer. Pleasure to meet you, my dear.” He held out his hand for you to shake.

“Nice to meet you too,” you replied as you took his hand. “I’m ______.”

“Well, hi, ______,” he said, taking a sip of the drink he had ordered. He shuddered. “Oh, man,” he laughed, “that’s good.”

You giggled. “Strong too, huh?”

“Yeah,” he laughed again.

You spent a few more minutes talking, laughing together at the bar. You had both ordered three more drinks.

Lucifer moved his hand to your knee. “I’d like to take you home,” he slurred.

“Be my guest,” you flirted, finishing your last drink and standing up.

Lucifer linked arms with you and walked with you out the door.

“My place is just around the corner,” you told him. “We can go there.”

Lucifer nodded before moving his arm around your waist. “Alright with me.”

————————

When you finally arrived at your place and locked the door behind you, Lucifer pulled you in for a kiss. He groaned, swiping his tongue over your bottom lip. He smiled against your lips when you granted him access. Your clothes seemed to disappear as your tongues wrestled with each other, each one fighting for dominance.

“Wait a minute,” you pushed him backwards. “Do you have a split tongue?”

Lucifer grinned before he stuck his tongue out. “Wanna see what it can do?” He asked in a sultry tone.

You nodded, smiling cheekily. You led him to your bed before collapsing onto it.

Lucifer pushed you even further up the mattress before picking your thighs up and resting them on his shoulders. He pressed a few teasing kisses to your thighs before kissing your cunt.

You moaned in want, earning a chuckle from the man between your legs.

Lucifer immediately dove into your cunt, sucking on your sensitive nub and licking stripes up your clit. His tongue slipped in and your of your hole quickly. He moaned at the taste of you, suckling on your every part.

You whined, the coil in your stomach snapping. “L-Lucifer!” You cried as you came undone on his tongue. You ground against his tongue, riding out your orgasm.

Lucifer groaned, not letting a single drop of your cum go to waste. After you had calmed down, Lucifer set your thighs down.

You finally got a look at Lucifer’s dick. “God,” you whispered.

He giggled. “Is it up to your standards, ______?”

You nodded, now creeping towards the man. You took Lucifer’s cock in your hand and stroked it a few times before pressing a kiss to his tip.

“Oh, fuck,” he groaned, his head tilting back slightly. “That’s-ahm-that’s nice…” His moans increased in pitch, turning into whines and whimpers as pleasure overtook him.

You licked at his slit, effectively teasing him. You stroked the parts of his cock you couldn’t fit in your mouth and gripped his balls in your hand, squeezing them slightly.

Lucifer gasped, his hands fisting the sheets. “Mnnh!” He whimpered as his tip hit the back of your throat, making you gag around him. “Oh, ______! I-AH!-I’m gonna-MPH!-I’m gonna cum! Oh, fffuuuuuuck!” He cried, bucking his hips up as his own coil snapped.

You squeezed your eyes shut, focusing on swallowing the seed that filled your mouth. You sucked him off through his orgasm, riding him through it. Once Lucifer’s hips stopped bucking wildly and he had calmed down, you pulled off of him. “Feel good, handsome?” You asked him teasingly.

He nodded, a blush spreading over his face. “Lay back, darling,” he said breathlessly, gently pushing you down on the bed. “It’s my turn to play.”

You giggled, reluctantly laying down.

Lucifer climbed on top of you, his eyes glazed over with lust. He put on a condom, a small gasp leaving his lips as he gently touched his sensitive dick. He gripped his length, slowly rubbing it against your dripping cunt. He finally slipped his tip into your waiting hole, a groan leaving his lips as his head tipped back a bit.

You gasped as Lucifer thrusted into you slowly, his cock reaching deeper into you each time he pushes in. “Oh, god…” you moaned as he bottomed out inside of you, his length filing you up completely.

“Oh, you feel so good,” Lucifer groaned, his hands gripping your hips harshly. His face was contorted in pleasure, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, as if he were focusing. “D-d’ya need a mi-minute?” He gasped as your pussy clenched around him involuntarily.

You shook your head ‘no’. “‘m ready, Lucifer.”

Lucifer nodded as he pulled halfway out. He thrusted into your cunt, a moan escaping the both of you. He bit his lip, a trickle of blood flowing out. He took one of his hands and placed it above your head, leaning over you and pressing kisses to your neck, sucking gently.

You whined lowly as Lucifer continued to thrust into you. “Oh, fuck, Luci~!” You moan as his dick hits that spongy spot inside of your cunt.

“I-Ahm!-I like that title,” he moaned into your ear, pressing a kiss there as well.

You took his face in your hand and pulled him in for a kiss. Your tongues fought each other once more as you drank in each other’s moans.

“Hugnh, ______! I’m g-gonna-ANGH!-cum! Oh, fuck! MPH!” He whimpered, the coil in his stomach building up once more.

“I’m c-close, t-AHM-too, Luci! Oh, FUCK!” You cried out as you came on Lucifer’s cock, cunt spasming around his length.

“Fffffuuuuuuuck, YES!” Lucifer nearly screamed as his second orgasm of the night ripped through him. He bit your neck as he ground into you, riding both you and himself through your orgasms.

When the both of you had calmed down, you tilted your head to look at Lucifer.

“Round two?”

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#hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #hazbin #lucifer hazbin hotel #smut #lucifer x reader #hazbin hotel lucifer smut #hazbin hotel smut #hazbin hotel smut lucifer #hazbin hotel x reader #lucifer x you

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dalekowrites · 4 months ago

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What would your favourite choice of the games interactive stories be? Would you have a favourite type? Romance, Fantasy etc. and did any of the inspire you with the ones you are currently writing? 😁

Oh boy! This is going to be a long answer, brace yourself lol

Let me start by saying that I have a degree in English literature (in fact, I'm going to do a PhD on it), so reading, in general, is one of the core activities of my life.

As for text adventures, even if not from Choice of Games Ltd., I'd like to mention a few inspirations: my passion first came from the original Choose Your Own Adventure series, and I still remember which numbers obsessed me as a child: Mountain Survival #28, The Dragons' Den #33, and more than any other, Space Patrol #22! (The latter may have also fueled my unhealthy obsession with Star Trek TOS, actually). For those unfamiliar with this fantastic book series, the genres of the three books I mentioned are, respectively, adventure, fantasy, and sci-fi. This gives you an idea of how varied my tastes are...

Later on, I discovered interactive fictions and text adventures. Dude, it was a dream come true. I started with Adventure ('76, never finished it, of course) and Zork ('79, never finished that either… of course. How damn hard were they?!). Then Mystery Mansion ('78), Castle Adventure ('82), and too many, many others. I'm a sucker for Sorcery! from inkle, and I deeply loved Magium (RIP Chris, you won't be forgotten). For my Italian-speaking friends, I also really enjoyed the Fra Tenebra e Abisso series (although its current status is unknown).

But back to CoG-related things. I've read a lot, and I'd probably be faster telling you what I didn't like! As you may have figured out by now, I don't have any particular genre preferences as long as a story is well-written, though horror-thriller stories usually grab my attention more easily.

Important note: I've read a lot of stories and, with a few exceptions, I liked most of them. To avoid writing a too-long list, here are the published stories that really impressed me:

A Crown of Sorcery and Steel,

A Midsummer Night's Choice,

Blood for Poppies,

Blood Moon,

Broadway: 1849,

Choice of the Cat,

Choice of the Vampire,

Donor,

Doomsday on Demand (1 and 2),

Gilded Rails,

Golden Rose: Book One,

Jazz Age,

Lies Under Ice,

Life of a Mercenary,

Life of a Space Force Captain,

MetaHuman Inc.,

Noblesse Oblige,

Paradox Factor,

The Evertree Saga (all four books),

Rent-a-Vice,

Revolution Diabolique,

Siege of Treboulain,

Tally Ho,

The Daily Blackmail,

The Dragon and the Djinn,

The Fernweh Saga: Book One,

The Fog Knows Your Name,

The Gray Painter,

The Grim and I,

The Ghost and the Golem,

The Lost Heir,

The Midnight Saga: The Monster,

The Parenting Simulator,

The Play's the Thing,

The Soul Stone War (1 and 2),

The War for the West,

Tudor Intrigue,

Vampire Regent,

Vampire: The Masquerade (all of them),

Way Walkers: University (1 and 2),

Welcome to Moreytown,

Werewolves: Haven Raising,

Zombie Exodus,

Zombie Exodus: Safe Haven.

And now, onto works in progress! There aren’t that many because I barely have time to follow my own (heh…), so here, in alphabetical order, are the ones I'm following with the most interest:

Adoriel's Tears (@adoriels-tears-if),

A Father's Love (@kal-down),

Crown of Ashes and Flames (@coeluvr),

Dawn Chorus (@dawnchorus-if)

Disenchanted (@disenchantedif),

Dragon's Edged (@dragonedged-if),

Elysium (@elysiumcircusif),

Fallen Lights (@fallenlightsif),

For King and Country (@forkingandcountry-if),

From The Ashes We Rise (@kal-down),

Hubris (@hubris-the-if-game),

Kingdoms and Empires (@kingdoms-and-empires),

Return to Misty Cove (@fluorescent-if),

The Abyssal Song (@ri-writes-if),

The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - An affair of the heart (@doriana-gray-games),

The Lonely Shore (@thelonelyshore-if),

The King's Hound (@the-kingshound),

The Reaper Watches Me (@thereaperwatchesme),

The Bureau (@thebureau),

The Unseelie (@theunseelieif),

Van Helsing (@vanhelsing-if),

When Life Gives You Lemons (@when-life-gives-you-lemons-if).

Okay, that was… a lot. As for direct inspirations, I don't have any direct ones, but I can say I felt like writing a post-apocalyptic story after reading Doomsday on Demand! Other than that, I guess the collection of narrative, text adventures, and interactive fiction I've read have led me to where I am now.

Damn, it took me hours to write this answer. I hope it's satisfying at least! Thanks for asking ☺

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ruewrote · 9 months ago

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𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑠𝑎𝑓𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑛 𝑠𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑦.

PAIRING: jacob custos x fem!reader WARNINGS: jacob's bear trap injury, strong language GENRE: angst / fluff SONG INSPIRATION: start a riot by BANNERS WORD COUNT: 1k

navigation | ask | the quarry masterlist

out of all the horror movies that you'd watch about vampires, zombies and werewolves you never thought you'd ever be in one of your own.

especially not in the summer camp that you'd grown to love over the years.

now desperately trying to find your fellow work friends, hoping that they'd gotten to safety. you silently prayed that you would too as you made your way through the thick forest to the main lodge.

the emergency fire axe felt heavy in your hand, your skin covered in dried mud and blooming bruises. fuck this night, fuck everything.

every little sound terrifying you, not realizing how loud everything used to be until now. whether that be the crunch of twigs underneath your boots or the whoosh of the wind.

"ah fuck! ah shit!" someone whimpered in pain, moving closer as you readied the axe, moving through the trees to find jacob and an old guy with a sniper rifle with his back to you.

"look if you could just--" jacob begged, but soon stopped when you knocked the hunter out with the back of your axe.

"holy shit!" your breath staggered as you dropped to your knees, inspecting the bear trap that had clamped itself around jacobs ankle, surprised that he was even conscious. oh right , adrenaline.

"oh my god, am i happy to see you right now!" he shouts, but is quickly cut off with your hand tightly covering his mouth.

"you've got to be quiet. something is out here with us, i’m not quite sure what, but i've also got to try and pry this open. whatever you do, you've got to be silent. we can't attract more attention to ourselves, okay?" you whisper, earning a timid nod from him.

removing your hand you get to work, glad to have accidentally watched that documentary a while back you were able to press the two spring levers, making it fall open.

you were quick to grab him before he lost his balance, helping him stand, wrapping his arm around your shoulders for support and yours firmly wrapped around his waist. making a slight mental note to ask why he was practically naked later.

helping him back to the lodge for some sort of first aid. the two of you walking in tandem, your grip on him tightening as he wobbled trying to hold back his groans. you reached up for his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. jacob giving you a tight but appreciative smile in return.

your legs ache when you finally reach the building, carefully sitting jacob down on the bench in the kitchen, grabbing the first aid kit out of the cupboard, a fresh glass of water and the paper towels off of the rack.

"i’m not even going to sugarcoat this, this is gonna hurt like a bitch. but i promise i'm gonna try to be as careful as i can, okay?" you uttered and he nodded.

you began to unbuckle your belt, unlooping it before holding it out to him, jacob grabbed a hold of it confused, "to bite down on, worst case,"

not caring if it was dirty or not he bit down on it, letting out a sigh you picked up the glass of water, pouring it around the wound, using a piece of the tissue to swipe away the dirt. briefly looking up to see his hands squeeze the wood underneath him.

wincing for him, you opened a disinfectant wipe wasting no time to swipe it around his injury, making him let out a whine. stopping for a second to place your hand over his.

causing him to look down at you with tears in his eyes, your heart breaking for him. "i know, i'm so sorry. all i gotta do is wrap it up. it shouldn't hurt too bad,"

and so you did, your belt now back to holding up your shorts as you looked through the pantry for any sort of food. making sure that jacob stayed sat down even though he wanted to help.

"a-ha!" you announced, grabbing the unopened box of cereal bars, returning to jacob. "how long do you think they've been in there?" he joked.

"after tonight i think the last thing we have to worry about is expiration dates, but of course i checked and they're okay, actually relatively new so we're good."

handing him one then another for yourself, shoving the rest in your backpack. retrieving the oversized hoodie offering it to him.

"quick question, where are your clothes?"

"me and emma went swimming in the lake for old times sake, until we heard abi scream. well at least i did, emma kinda disappeared after that." his words coming out huffed as he pulled the clothing over his head.

you looked down and started playing with your hands, trying to hide the hurt on your face. of course he was with her! what were you expecting? the whole summer you had been crushing on him, having to stay quiet about it because of her.

"oh. well i'm sure she's okay, she's...strong ya know?" you offered him a small smile.

"thank you by the way," he started, your eyebrows furrowed. "with saving me back there and you patching me up. i swear i was about to die!"

he playfully knocked his shoulder into yours, looking at him concerned, "don't joke like that. i-i don't think i could handle that... losing you i mean." a frown now replaced your smile from just thinking about it.

"hey, hey. i'm not going anywhere, well not if i have a say in it anyways." he leans into you, making you look back up at him.

the way his eyes flickered from your eyes to your lips, made your breath hitch as he leaned closer, lips almost touching when you heard a girl's scream.

"emma?" jacob jumps up and limps out of the lodge, leaving you sitting there alone feeling your heartache and the tears sting in your eyes.

who were you kidding yourself? he'd always pick her.

comments and reblogs are appreciated ♡

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dick-helmet-magneto · 6 months ago

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AUgust

Along with @okayigetitifuckedup a challenge has been made. We present: AUgust

It is exactly what it sounds like, Alternative Universe prompts that are made with the month of August in mind (nothing related to the month specifically other than the first two letters and this challenge taking place)

The prompts are being posted early to give people time to find this and get an early start if they want to but no pressure to anyone.

The rules are simple: Any media goes. Art, edits, writing, anything. And any fandom is welcome to participate these prompts weren't made with any one particular fandom in mind (creators are in different fandoms and came up with the prompts together). And the tag for posting works: #superior AUgust The only real rules are start posting the prompt fills in the month of August. Go past the month? That's okay! Start early? Go for it!

Prompts under the cut:

1.) Royalty AU

Prince and princess, king and king, a peasant who falls in love with the prince, anything.

2.) Fake Dating AU

Faking love, falling in love along the way, or trying to hide feelings they already have.

3.) Secret Relationship AU

A well kept secret or so poorly kept that only the two in the relationship doesn’t know.

4.) Soulmate AU

Matching tattoos, first words, red string, do as you please.

5.) Criminal AU

Already a criminal? Then take it away from them.

6.) Supernatural AU

Vampires, werewolves, and zombies oh my

7.) School AU

Professors, college or high school students, high school teachers

8.) Sugar Daddy AU

One rich fuck and one struggling, together they make one fully functional being.

9.) Sci-Fi AU

Aliens, time travel, space, parallel universe, the possibilities are out of this world.

10.) Android AU

Turn man into metal and have him slowly learn and explore emotions.

11.) Institution AU

Prison, mental institution, rehab. We couldn't decide

12.) Happily Ever After AU

Give them the happy ending canon won’t.

13.) Sex Work AU

Pornstar, stripper, or just good old fashion sex work

14.) Roommate AU

And they were roommates

15.) Poverty AU

Take that poor little meow meow and make him a poor poor little meow meow

Need something more? Don't want to use one of the other prompts?

Alternatives:

Stalker AU

Fantasy AU

Addiction AU

Omegaverse AU

#charlie's thinly veiled attempts to get more secret relationship and fake dating fics #writing prompts #prompts #AUgust #august writing challenge #writing challenge #art prompt #edit prompts #fic prompt #art ideas #fic ideas #edit ideas

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lucithekingofhell · 1 month ago

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Luci! I'm so sorry I haven't done ANYTHING for over a MONTH! Since October 7th I checked😞

Okay so. How are you and Alastor and Zoe and everyone else doing????

Here are some jokes to make up for all the missed Joke Of the Day’s!

Who's in charge of the candy corn? The kernel.

When do cows turn into werewolves? During the full mooooooooon.

Why was the corn afraid to go to the Halloween party? Because it was poppin’!

What is a zombie's favorite kind of bean? A human bean.

What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon? A sourpuss!

What’s the banshee’s favorite flavor of ice cream? Cookies and scream.

What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman? Frostbite.

What did the leftover turkey say? “Make me a sandwich!”

What is a turkey‘s favorite month?

They don’t have one, but they prefer any other than November.

Why did the turkey bring a microphone? He was ready to roast.

what do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede? “Drumsticks for everyone!”

If you call a big turkey a gobbler, what do you call a small one? A goblet.

Oh and it's December first! Here is a Christmas joke for ya! Oh er… Xmas I mean. Sorry. Still used to Christmas not Xmas😅

Where do short people go on the first of December? Santa’s Workshop. They need to get back to work.

And just in case I don't show up tomorrow!

How much is a short person’s holiday bonus? Nothing. They never get one.

Anyway! Have a lovely day! I hope you are doing well! Oh, and Luci, remember my friend who did the handsome Squidward drawings? Yeah, she made an account on Tumblr. So if you happen to come across her work. That's the same gal who did those drawings!

Bye bye! 👋👋

"don't worry, it's good to hear from you again! When I saw you licking some of our old things pretty happy to see you online. We're all doing pretty well, also don't tell Zoe I'm telling you this but she's got a girlfriend! She likes girls too, we have so much I'm common! Now let me read these jokes-"

...

Charlie: "so um Charlie here, again. I honestly don't know what happened but my dad, Zoe and Al are dying laughing... what happened?.."

...

//Zoe: HAHAHA OK SO I COME HERE TO GIVE AN ANSWER. PAPA WAS LAUGHING CAME TO CHECK I SAW AND STARTED LAUGHING. THEN DAD CAME AND HE ALSO STARTED LAUGHING. WE CAN'T STOP LAUGHING HAHAHAHAHAAH

#hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #lucifer hazbin hotel #hazbin lucifer #hazbin hotel lucifer #alastor #luci #lucifer #hazbin #sinner zoe

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queenbread · 26 days ago

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What makes a human not a human

Like you could make the argument if you're born a human you stay a human, but then you have zombies

Maybe it's the cognitive function? But then you have vampires

Oh, well then it's just what your body is. Well no, we have people with mutations, extra fingers, toes, etc.

Now this gets even more confusing if you add stuff like scp into this question, because then you have anomalies, reality benders, etc

Iris is a human right? But also no??? Even with her powers? But the classification is unclear

Hell by these thoughts you could even go into is clef human. He's got an extra eye and powers and stuff but he's still got all the cognitive function of a human and stuff

But again, vampires, vampires are like humans, same brain power, started out human, so where did the change become clear? Where's the line?????

VAMPIRES AND WEREWOLVES SCREW UP THE ENTIRE CLASSIFICATION SYSTEM

You have books and movies where humans have powers, what makes that different? Why are they considered human if a vampire isn't?

WHAT MAKES SOMETHING NOT A HUMAN DO YOU SEE MY PROBLEM

If we found aliens on a different planet that were just like humans but on a different planet would we call them humans or aliens???

#I think way too hard about these things #BUT DO YOU SEE MY PROBLEM #Ramble #Rant #Nighttime thoughts #Please #Somebody #Someone has to have an answer

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meerawrites · 2 years ago

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Introduction to writeblr

Hello I am Meera S (they/them), I am a speculative fiction writer, writer of historical fiction and more, all of it is queer centric and with person of global majority (colour) angle. Please interact with this post and I shall add you back to the best of my ability!

about my writing

I’ve been writing and fan fictioning since I was 10. I started my first novel a little over a year ago, I am editing it in a month. I gravitate towards the gothic and historical but I am not gonna limit myself to that. I also write short stories, fic and poetry.

1. Vampires, witches, werewolves, ghosts, and more, oh my!: I love me some monsters and allegories that are multilayered, just not zombies.

2. Fantasy and gothic, I write about the human through the inhuman, Anne Rice once said vampire was the most poignant allegory for outcast and other-ness.

3. The historical. You have to know the past to understand the present and future. Ancient History through 1920s and all of South Asian history and mythology.

4. Diversity: I am a queer south asian person but I do earnestly try for informed diverse world views that are nuanced and sympathetic even if not “moral” because vampire, etc.

about me

read here.

fandoms: read here. go here for fandom stuff. Here for history. Here for fic. Role-play masterlist.

Influences: Anne Rice, Oscar Wilde, Octavia Butler, Indu Sundaresan, @writingvampires, @elisaintime, Silvia Moreno Garcia and @saintmachina.

what i'm looking for

1. Friends and cool people.

2. eventual beta readers/editors.

3. Other writers.

4. people who know people etc.

genres i read

I gravitate towards the gothic and historical, but anything well written and I think worthwhile.

Just finished: Good Omens, Lasher by Anne Rice, catching up with Dracula daily . also following @re-dracula.

Immediately going to read: Taltos by Anne Rice, The Vampire Lestat by Anne Rice, Common Sense by Thomas Paine, and the memoir of Benjamin Tallmadge (the memoir is only 75 pages long so..)

WIPS

Presently unamed, editing in a month: What if Sibyl Vane was too haunt Dorian Gray? Heavily inspired by Wilde’s poetry, Emilie Autumn, steampunk, the allegory of ghosts as the inescapable past popularized by Charles Dickens in A Christmas Carol. As well as the folklore of banshees, avenging angels & La Llorona. More here. Playlist.

Pending: novella: les liaisons dangereuses x vampires. Playlist.

Pleasure to make your acquaintance!

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creampuffs-for-carmilla · 6 months ago

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Carmilla Week 2024

Hello again, Creampuffs!

In honor of the 10 year anniversary, this blog will be hosting Carmilla Week 2024 leading up to the anniversary of Season 1 premiering! You have a bit over a month to complete any prompts you'd like (Hopefully, all of them!) and should upload any submissions here with the tag #carmillaweek2024 so we can see all of your amazing fanworks! Anything goes so long as it relates to the theme and any questions are welcome! That and posting on the day the theme is scheduled for.

Before checking the prompts, please join our Discord and give this blog a follow to stay updated and see what other Creampuffs are saying! Here are this year's prompts and ideas to get you going:

Day 1- Orientation Day (August 13)

Welcome, everyone to Carmilla Week! Orientation is underway where you can explore different clubs at Silas University! Check in with Danny and the Summer Society as they do their morning runs. Or perhaps you want to party with Kirsch and the Zetas? Speaking of, what’s the Alchemy Club been up to…? Whatever it is, there’s a club for everyone (Unless you’re Laura Hollis… She didn’t make the cut for the Newspaper Club…) Either way, Orientation Day lets you explore any clubs Silas has to offer, including ones you headcanon exist or the ones that do exist. Perhaps Laura did find a club to join or it could explain why Carmilla sneaks off so often.

Day 2- Zombies and Werewolves and Vampires, Oh My! (August 14)

Ignore the evil cabal of vampires running the place, we’re diverse! The captain of the swim team is a mermaid, there’s that rumor the Summers are a werewolf pack, and our gardener is actually a zombie tending to graves and flowers alike! Today is the day where anything goes and you can even explore if LaFontaine is a cyborg or maybe Laura is a fairy. Be creative and explore what supernatural creatures may exist within Silas!

Day 3- Dorm Life (August 15)

Silas University is prestigious and offers only the best of the best! Not counting the lack of knocking and paper-thin walls… In any case, explore what you think dorm life is like on campus! That includes (but not limited to!) trying to pass Professor Cochrane’s class, how out of control a Zeta party can get, or even a slice of life behind closed doors in 307. Have fun!

Day 4- Raining Cats and Dogs (August 16)

We all love Catmilla. Who doesn’t! Take this day to explore all the possibilities. Perhaps one of our beloved cast has found a loving pet? Maybe you want to explore the other vampire’s ability to shapeshift? Just don’t let the Dean catch you with a pet in your room, that can be grounds for expulsion.

Day 5- Road Trip (August 17)

All roads lead to Silas as they say. Laura, Perry, LaFontaine, and Carmilla certainly learned that trying to flee through the Alps! Who’s to say they can’t enjoy a fun road trip though! Laura and Carmilla did go to Paris. Maybe Perry and LaFontaine

Day 6- Life After College (August 18)

All good things come to an end and so do our college years. We got a sneak peek of how the gang lived 5 years after Silas, but what about the before and after? Your imagination is the limit as you can explore Laura’s first job or Carmilla finding a fun way to spend her vampire trust fund. Perhaps the LaFerry Industries had a shaky start? You can even get into Danny’s new life as a vampire working as a vampire’s rights advocate… And maybe something a bit more secret!

Day 7- Anniversary (August 19)

The reason we’re all here. Happy 10th anniversary to Carmilla: The Series! Explore what an anniversary means to you. Maybe you want to explore how Laura and Carmilla celebrate their first anniversary, whether girlfriend-wise or wife-wise. You can dedicate a piece to the show in general.

As always, thank you for participating, please check FAQ for more details and upcoming events, and if you have any questions, feel free to send an ask!

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honeythispodcast · 2 years ago

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oh shit awooooo rattling bones screeching past windows electrocuting this podcast into a living dude ITS ALIVE.

It’s our LONGEST and SPOOKIEST episode yet! This week we talk about our favorite movie monsters, vampires and zombies, and discuss queer themes in horror movies. We dig into how these monsters were represented in film in the 70s and 80s and how they went on to influence vampires and zombies in My Chemical Romance.

Topics include: fanfiction in 2105, “the gothic”, groaning and boning, monsters as meaning machines, Dracula as a lesbian, film and the uncanny, Maren’s Hayes Code Hour, mass-market horror, Ronald Reagan, body horror and porn, kissing Nosferatu on his head, “suckin’” as a cultural universal, vampires as a marketing scheme for the Catholic Church, normie vampires, Bela Lugosi, Zombie socialism, bad pandemic media, zombie gender, omegaverse and werewolves, the Bullets vampire nightclub, Twilight, and how there’s no 9/11 in Sex and the City.

#my chemical romance #mcr #gerardtweets #gerard way #ray toro #frank iero #mikey way #vampires #honey this podcast #dracula #zombies

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hadtochangemyurlquick · 1 year ago

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it's really late but here's the fic recs for clextober!!!

Day 1: Spirit Week!

who are you wearing? by geralehane (@geralehane)

is your classic halloween soulmate au that, thanks to the quality of the writing, hits extremely hard everytime. for a simple concept i have layed awake at night thinking about it.

Day 2: Pumpkin Spice & Everything Nice

A Bit of Clarity by Aphrodites Law (@aphrodites-law)

is a sweet fall themed supernatural au that I'm sure we all know and love but is always worth giving a shout out. everyone begins to get visions of their past lives and it's a coffee shop au. If you like soulmates, read this asap.

Day 3: Annual Fall Festival

the river's deep (but I swam it) by isawet (@sunspill)

i love isawet's one shots and this collection of halloween prompt fills written in 2017 is some of my favorite that they've done. highly recommend to anyone who wants to stay in the halloween spirit. mostly modern aus and all absolutely perfectly bite sized while still remaining filling.

Day 4: Magical Nights

oh where do we begin? (the rubble or our sins) by the_crownless_queen

this is one of those lost in the clexa tag one shots that i always think gets overlooked. i always wished they would continue it, but even as a one shot it is so fantastic to think about and adore, and absolutely worth the read.

Day 5: The Other Side

breathe into my lips the life i do not have by ur_the_puppy (@ur-the-puppy)

ur_the_puppy's ability to put 40k words into one chapter and still have it be not only coherent but heart wrenching and gorgeous is unparalleled. this one follows clarke in a haunted house, falling in love with her roommate. would highly recommend if you need to cry and also feel joy but in the way zadie smith defines it.

Day 6: Vampires vs. Werewolves

bleeding love by geralehane (@geralehane)

you know, i try to avoid reccing the same author twice in a rec list, but i could not decide between these two, and i gave up. especially since i'm supposed to be doing a reading rn lol. i can't telly ou how many times ive read this goddamn story and lost my fucking mind. it wouldn't be possible, honestly. young vampire clarke and elder vampire lexa fall in love. trust me.

Day 7: Free Day

Shifters by DreamsAreMyWords (@dreamsaremywords)

damw is fairly (and rightfully) well known in the fandom for specifically their ability with craft in the fantastical genre. I like to pick less well known fics for my free day and i have to say, this one is entirely overlooked. i love a zombie apocalypse and this is a total twist on the genre. the line "birth is always violent" has stayed with me not as just a powerful line but as a mantra to remind myself that becoming will hurt but is worth it. would highly recommend you move it up your marked for later lists.

#Clextober23 #7DaysofClexa #clexa #the 100 #clarke griffin #lexa #commander princess #clexa fanfic #clexa fanfic recs #happy halloween ridiculously late lol #gus reads

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mushroompone · 11 months ago

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Hello! I really love your writing and with all the hype going with the mlp infection/zombie I was wondering how do you approach writing horror/gore? I mostly like to write slice of life, romantic, fluffy stories, so whenever I try to write something darker, a zombie apocalypse for example, the violence feels juvenile and the horror falls flat. Your stuff is absolutely terrifying and amazing, so I'm just sitting here wondering how?? I know that's a broad question, but I would appreciate a peek into your thought process for writing horror. Thank you and have a good day!!

Oh my gosh you're so kind!! First off, thank you! I have really enjoyed writing horror for this community for many years now, and it's been sorry cool to see this massive interest during of of nowhere for MLP horror content!

Second, definitely a broad question, but I can offer some broad tips in response:

(1) Work with what scares you. Horror actually comes naturally to most of us, you just have to be willing to explore some of the darker corners of yourself. Consume horror as much as possible and try not to shy away from what scares you. Most importantly, though, understand why you find it scary. This leads to step 2...

(2) Drill down to the core fear. There's a lot of creatures and things that pop up in horror again and again: ghosts, vampires, werewolves, and certainly zombies. But to work with these effectively we have to understand why they scare us. The answer is different for everyone! Let's take zombies as an example: for me, zombies are scary because they are infectious. I find plagues and diseases to be really really scary, even pre-covid lol. For others, it's more about loss of control - becoming a zombie means becoming an animal, or something else inhuman. Dig until you find the why. Then...

(3) Give someone the worst day possible. Picking your protagonist is critical. The monster has to be difficult for them to face! So think about what will play well off your core fear. If you've found zombies as your monster and distilled that to loss of control .. well, Luna would be a great choice! She's all about loss of control. That's super scary and very real for her. If you're going in more of an infectious disease direction, Twilight would make more sense - she would make a very believable germaphobe, yet still be driven to help those around her and find a cure. If you do it right, all you have to do is...

(4) Sit back and let it happen. It helps to have a destination in mind (even if it's as simple as "happy ending" or "real downer"), but if you've set yourself up this way you've got a concept and you're ready to let it rip. Start writing. Be gross. Scare yourself. Look over your shoulder and wonder who might be watching you. If you get stuck, ask yourself this: how could this possibly get any worse? Then do that. With pizzazz.

The details of writing prose that is gooey, gory, and chilling come from reading. You'll start to get a feel for where to linger, where to hold back, where to describe, and what to leave up to your reader's imagination. The hardest part is the balancing act - keep some things obscured. Leave some mystery while making it clear what is scary and why. However, once your audience knows the precise size and shape of what they're dealing with, it becomes a lot less scary! My rule of thumb is that I never want my audience to be able to plan a way around the danger. They should never be able to devise their own means of escape - something should always be left uncertain or shrouded in darkness.

I hope this helps!! If you'd ever like someone to look at what you're working on, I love beta-reading pony horror :) actually, come to think of it, I love beta-reading all horror!

Again, thank you! Your an earned my heart ❤️ I love hearing that my sacred are still scaring!

#im in quite a few mlp discords that are very interested in mlp horror also #so if you ever wanted to join a community like that im happy to share!#but since i dont own those discords im not willing to just post willy-nilly #idk maybe i should make an evil horse discord...#mlp #mlp horror #mlp fim horror #mlp fic #mlp fim fic #mlp fim horror fic #mlp fim #my little pony

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thedemoninmywalls · 8 months ago

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The Party

Rire brings Aro to a party with all his friends.

“By the way, we’re going to a party next week,” Rire said offhandedly.

“Huh?” Aro glanced up at him. “What kind of party?”

“A gathering of sorts,” Rire waved his hand dismissively. “For supernatural creatures like myself. You will accompany me as my consort.”

“But I'm a human,” Aro said worriedly. “Am I allowed to come?”

“You will come because I ordered you to,” he answered sternly. “Many of my acquaintances will be there, so it is important to make a good impression.”

Aro thought about it. Besides Rire, she had never seen a supernatural creature before. It sounded exciting. How many humans had the opportunity to go to a party for magical beings? She couldn't help but be curious about what it was like.

“Where will the party be?” she asked. “What kind of people will be there? Will food be served? Is it like a human party? What do you do there?”

“You will see everything for yourself,” Rire chuckled. “When the time comes.”

In preparation, Rire bought a dress for Aro to wear to the party. It was quite revealing and she wasn't thrilled to be dressing like that in front of strangers. But Rire insisted she wear it or go naked, so she reluctantly pulled on the dress.

He himself wore a perfectly tailored suit that was also revealing, but he carried himself with much more confidence than Aro could ever muster.

When it was time to go, Rire still hadn't told Aro where exactly the party was taking place.

“It is somewhere that humans cannot reach,” he explained. “But before we go, here are your rules: first, you are forbidden from speaking to anyone unless they speak to you first. Second, you will stay by my side at all times. Is that clear?”

“Don’t talk and don't wander off. Got it.”

“Very good. A lone human could be quite vulnerable here, but you’ll be safe with me. Now, brace yourself.”

He covered her eyes and put an arm around her waist. Aro felt herself being lifted up and moving at an unimaginable speed, as though traveling through space and time itself.

In a second it was over and she was back on solid ground. Rire uncovered her eyes to reveal that they had landed in a huge, beautiful ballroom with vaulted ceilings and atmospheric lighting.

“Wow,” Aro gasped, marveling at the magnificent setting.

But even more fascinating were the other party guests. Creatures of all shapes, sizes, and species milled about the huge ballroom, talking and laughing. There were fairies and ogres, werewolves and vampires and giants, sirens and zombies and ghosts.

Some guests even looked human, but Aro suspected that was merely a disguise. Everyone was dressed as nicely as they could manage, in fancy suits and dresses.

There was an open bar where Rire bought a couple of drinks, most of which Aro had never heard of. Her drink was sweet and bubbly, exactly how she liked it.

Rire gallantly offered Aro his arm, and he swept her across the ballroom, greeting other guests and introducing her as his consort. Everyone was very polite and courteous.

Most of Rire's talk was business, and Aro found it boring to listen to. Nobody seemed interested in talking to her, which was fine. She was much more interested in looking around at all the strange and wonderful people. Several times she wanted to ask questions, to learn more, but she knew better than to disobey Rire’s orders.

As the evening wore on, Aro began to feel very sleepy. She had long finished her drink.

“Rire,” she tugged at his shirt. “I'm really tired. Can we go home soon?”

“Oh, good,” he smiled. “I was wondering when the drugs would kick in.”

A cold shiver straightened Aro’s spine. “What?”

“I slipped a relaxant into your drink,” Rire explained calmly. “I'm sorry, pet, but I can't have you acting like a brat in front of everyone. They’ve been so looking forward to playing with you.”

“Hey, Rire, is she ready yet?!” A large, muscled centaur called out.

“Yes, the drugs are taking effect,” Rire answered. “Thank you for being patient. It's her first time, you know.”

Several centaurs now leered at Aro with wide grins. Some of them approached her, carrying rope and chains.

“No, wait!” Aro clung to Rire desperately. For the moment terror overrode her sleepiness. “Rire, please, don't let them take me!”

“Don't worry, I will be right here the whole time,” Rire assured her, gently pushing her off him. “And you won't remember anything in the morning anyway.”

“Please no! Rire! RIRE!!” Aro screamed as three centaurs grabbed her.

They tore off her dress and manhandled her into a stretched position. Her hands were tied above her head and her legs were spread wide and shackled to the floor.

Aro’s face burned with shame and humiliation as she found herself naked and bound, on display in front of a whole ballroom full of people. Then someone wrapped a blindfold around her head, and everything went dark.

But she could still hear everything, especially different voices as people gathered around.

“Not much for looks, is she?”

“Who cares about her looks? All that matters is her holes.”

“Ha! Stupid human thought she was a guest, an equal to the rest of us! Gimme a break!”

“Weak, worthless humans are good for nothing except as toys to play with!”

“Everyone, line up in an orderly fashion,” Rire commanded. “You’ll all get your turn.”

Rough, unfamiliar hands seized Aro’s breast and squeezed painfully. “Aw, did you mark her already, Rire?”

“Of course. Just in case one of you forgets who she really belongs to.”

“Please…” Aro whimpered sleepily. “Someone…help…mmph!”

Something large and warm filled up Aro’s mouth, and she couldn't speak anymore.

For the next few hours Aro’s body was used and abused by countless strangers. She was choked, fucked, cut, teased, edged, groped, squeezed, tickled, poked and prodded. Some of it hurt like hell and some of it she barely felt.

The drugs made her mind hazy and her body pliable and submissive.

All the while she heard the various grunts and moans made by the people using her, punctuated now and then by Rire’s warnings.

“Handle her gently, Vincent, she's only human after all. They're terribly fragile and it's too early to break her.”

“No, Lawrence, you may not cut her open to see her insides.”

“Why, Celia! Are you going to fit that whole thing inside her? Well, you can certainly try…”

“Strade, put the knife down. Put it down! Good boy.”

“Ohhh, wow,” someone said close to Aro’s ear. “Look at how nicely she fits around my dick! She must be very well-trained.”

“You know me, Cain,” Rire replied. “I like my pets to be broken in, but not too broken…she's quite a fighter when she isn't drugged up, you know.”

Aro was grateful when she felt her consciousness slipping away from her. She knew that she was drooling but didn't have the strength to do anything about it. The drugs gently pulled her into a deep sleep.

Rire and the other party guests continued abusing Aro’s mouth and holes long into the night. No one seemed to notice when she fell asleep. —------ When Aro woke up the next morning, she had no memory of the previous night. This did not bother her as much as it probably should have. She was used to Rire manipulating her memories by now. She decided that she didn’t want to know what had happened last night. And she definitely didn’t want to know why her body ached more than usual…

#the demon in my walls #self ship #boyfriend to death #canon x self insert #btd rire #lucien rire #btd fanfic #cw free use

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juniperhillpatient · 20 days ago

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I wrote this fic for @hello-nichya-here because of our Wizards of Waverly Place re-watch. It's set directly after the episode "Alex in the Middle." Kelbo catches on that there's more to Alex's plans then a simple prank & does his best to help his niece & nephew along (in his own chaotic way). Enjoy!

“So, how’d the prank go with your brother?”

“Huh?” Alex asked, distracted. “What prank?”

In Alex’s defense, it was hard to focus on the conversation when there was horde of zombies chasing them. Uncle Kelbo had taken her to Fear Land, which was a wizard world haunted attraction with real ghosts, goblins, ghouls and zombies. They had just escaped the room with the shrieking banshee, who was very annoying and whiney and also loud. Now they were running across a field while an army of the undead moaned and followed them with outstretched arms, hungry for their flesh.

Alex slowed down and tilted her head as she realized something. “Hey, they’re all just walking. We don’t have to run.”

“Yeah, but it’s more fun if we run,” Kelbo said, doubling over and panting.

Alex groaned, clutching a stitch in her side. “You and I have very different ideas of fun, apparently.”

They hurried past the exit gate where an attendance with short dark hair and a rather vacant expression was waiting. She spoke in a tired, bored monotone voice. “Thank you for coming to Fear Land. Please remember that you signed a waver and Fear Land cannot be held legally responsible for any bodily or mental harm that you might have befallen while in the attraction.”

“I don’t remember signing a waiver,” Alex said, as she followed Kelbo over to a food stand. There were a lot of stands selling fried food and soda and a few rides including a Ferris wheel that levitated in the air with no support beams. Wizards as well as some vampires, werewolves, centaurs, elves and other wizard world folks were wandering around, chatting.

“Yeah,” Kelbo said. “That’s ‘cause I signed for you. Technically, you have to be eighteen to get into Fear Land, and they make you sign the contract in your blood on a charmed piece of paper that can tell your age by your blood. So, I may have helped you fib a little. Don’t tell your parents.”

Alex grinned. “You are so cool.”

A few minutes later, they were sitting at a picnic table, chowing down on fried unicorn horns. Alex was enjoying the evening. She could acknowledge that Uncle Kelbo was not the greatest magic teacher. She needed her dad to help slow her down and make her think, as much as she hated to admit it. Also, obviously, knowing that Dad won the wizard competition changed everything. He was the superior wizard after all, and thus exactly who she needed as a teacher. She still loved spending time with Uncle Kelbo in the wizard world. He treated her like an adult, not a kid, and let her be herself.

“So, what’s next?” Kelbo asked.

“Hm?” Alex said, swallowing a bite of her fried unicorn horn. “I didn’t know we were doing anything else tonight. Ooh, while we’re faking my age, will you take me to that cool wizard dance club, Zero Gravity? I heard everything floats in there!”

“No,” Kelbo said. Then he considered. “Well, maybe. Dancing with no gravity does sound pretty awesome.” Then his expression hardened. “No! Stop trying to distract me with awesome sounding clubs. Listen, I meant what’s next with the prank on your brother. You sent him all those love notes. Now what? Are you going to stink bomb his locker and put a note saying it’s from the secret admirer? Convince him it’s from some really hot girl he likes and then humiliate him by doing a spell to make him talk in a really deep voice like a cave man? Ooh! Or you could give him a really high voice like a little girl!”

Alex laughed. “Oh, that? Well, Justin kinda found out the notes were from me. You should’ve seen his face when he confronted me about it. He got so red, and his nose did that cute thing where it scrunches up and his eyes got all big.” She giggled, remembering, and spoke in an imitation of Justin. “Alex, I know it was you putting those notes in my locker! It wasn’t funny. I hid in a trash can!”

“Riiight,” Kelbo said. For some reason, he looked skeptical. “So, you just, put flirty notes in your brother’s locker everyday for a week and then it never really led to anything, and he just got kinda mad and now it’s forgotten?”

“Yeah, pretty much,” Alex said with a smile and a shrug. “So, anyway, about Zero Gravity, I hear-”

“I mean, I always noticed you guys were close,” Kelbo interrupted.

Alex snorted. “Ew? Close? Me and Justin. Please. He’s close with his science teacher.”

“Alex,” Kelbo said with an exasperated sigh. “Who do you talk to basically every night before you go to bed?”

“Well, obviously Justin, but-”

“Who can make you laugh even if you’re having a terrible day.”

“Sometimes Max, but usually not intentionally,” Alex said. Kelbo gave her a pointed look, and she rolled her eyes. “Fine, Justin can usually cheer me up if I’m upset, but-”

“And who do you go to anytime you’re in real trouble, the kind you don’t know how to get out of?”

“I mean, Justin, but-”

“Not even your parents!” Kelbo said. “Kid, you’re in denial.”

“In denial of what?” Alex asked. “Fine, I’ll admit it, Justin is a pretty great big brother. What does that have to do with anything?”

“Look, kid, I got you another present,” Kelbo said. He waved his wand, and a wrapped box appeared on the picnic table.

“Ooh, for me?” Alex asked. She clapped her hands. “Yay!” She hurried to open the box, and then frowned. Inside was a plastic mood ring. It was just like many she had purchased for cheap at the mall before. They tended to turn her fingers green. Alex tried to hide her disappointment. Unfortunately, she had never been very good at masking her feelings. “Oh, wow,” she said. “A mood ring…. Neat.”

Kelbo chuckled. “This is a special mood ring, okay? Give it to Justin. It’s a great uh,” he cleared his throat dramatically. The reason behind the fanfare was a mystery to Alex. “Prank.” He cleared his throat again. Then he winked.

Alex narrowed her eyes. “Why’d you say it like that? And why’d you wink?”

“I’m not winking,” Kelbo said, winking again.

“Okay then…” Alex said, giving him a discerning look. He was grinning, and not giving much away with his expression. After a moment, she got bored of trying to figure him out and gave up. “Well, whatever. I always like pranking Justin, so I’m in.”

“It definitely does not involve the Banana Song by Harry Belafonte,” Kelbo said.

Alex laughed. “Okayyy. Sure, Uncle Kelbo. Whatever you say.”

* * “I’m glad you had fun with Uncle Kelbo,” Justin said. He glared. “Be nice if he took me to some of these places.”

“Yeah, or me!” Max said.

Alex rolled her eyes. “Max, the last time Uncle Kelbo took you to a wizard world amusement park you had nightmares for a week. And not even because of anything scary.”

“I didn’t like the looks of that fairy princess, okay?” Max said. “Too pink.” He shuddered. “And her breath smelled like perfume. It was creepy.”

“And Justin, are you seriously telling me you would be willing to lie about your age on a blood contract?” Alex continued. “Uncle Kelbo took me because he knew I could handle it.”

“You lied about your age on a blood contract?” Justin asked, his eyes bugging.

“See?” Alex said. “This is why you don’t get invited to these things.”

“Kids, it’s getting time to get ready for bed,” Theresa said, walking out from behind the counter in the kitchen where she had been cleaning some dishes. “I’m just going to pretend I didn’t overhear anything about any blood contracts because honestly, I’m tired and I don’t have the patience for any weird wizard drama right now.”

Alex made a face. She had kind of forgotten Mom was back there, honestly. “Probably for the best.”

“Alright, the restaurant is all shut down,” Jerry said, entering the apartment. “What are you kids still doing up? Alex, I take it everything went well with your uncle?”

“Yep,” Alex said brightly. She could sense Justin itching to blurt out about the blood contract, and hurried to say something that would distract him. “Uncle Kelbo was talking about taking Justin with us to Fear Land next.”

“You went to Fear Land?” Jerry asked. “I remember he and I going there when we were teenagers. Back then it was eighteen and up. Guess it’s changed. We had to find some older wizards to help us fake sign these waivers in blood because we weren’t old enough.” He chuckled. “Man, those were some fun times. We used to get into so many crazy situations. There was this one time with a succubus that-” he stopped, seeing Theresa’s face, and cleared his throat. “That was very bad.” Then he frowned. “Wait a minute. Alex, please tell me that my brother did not sneak you into a haunted attraction illegally by faking a blood contract?”

“Okay,” Alex said. “Uncle Kelbo definitely did not do any of that stuff you just said.”

Jerry sighed and rubbed his forehead. “We are going to have a serious conversation about what you get up to with your uncle. For now, get ready for bed.”

A while later, Alex couldn’t sleep. She was lying in bed in her pajamas, tossing and turning. She wasn’t too freaked out by the Fear Land attractions. Sure, the guy carrying his own severed head was a little icky. But it was the conversation with Kelbo that was bugging her. She hadn’t found an opportunity to give Justin the ring yet, and she wasn’t totally sure she even wanted to. Kelbo was just acting so weird about the whole thing, like there was a joke Alex wasn’t in on. She liked to be the one scheming and pulling pranks, not having pranks pulled on her.

After a while, Alex snuck downstairs to get a glass of water. Also, to see if Justin was still up. She had heard him in he hallway walking around not too long ago, and she never heard him come back upstairs. She had the mood ring from Kelbo in her pocket just in case she decided to give it to him after all.

Alex hesitated on the stairs. Justin was sitting on the sofa under a throw blanket, watching a DVR recording of the channel five news. Alex recognized the news anchor’s perky expression and thick brunette hair, and her stupid fake breasts right away. It was the one Justin was obsessed with. He had cutouts of her in his room. Alex had once stolen one to use for her fake ID when she tried to sneak into Night of the Halloween Sorority Party Disaster Two.

Justin made a soft sound that made something deep in Alex’s core shift. His hand was moving under the blanket. Oh, gross. Alex figured out a beat too late what was happening. She was frozen though, staring. She knew she should hurry back upstairs, but then she would get caught. She was just standing there, halfway down the stairs, unable to tear her eyes away from the back of Justin’s head. The annoying news anchor was going on about the weather. Justin serious got off to THAT? Alex was affronted with the ridiculousness of that. She could be way hotter than some girl talking about the weather without even trying. Not that she wanted Justin to get off to her instead. It was just the principal of the thing.

Alex stayed there watching for a long time. She kept wanting to bolt upstairs, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. She told herself it was because the stairs would creak, and Justin would hear her. After a while, Justin sighed and slumped further into the pillows. Alex decided that now it would be safe to get her glass of water. She just had to pretend she was only just now coming down the stairs. She took several loud steps.

Justin sat bolt upright and spun around. “ALEX! What are you doing?”

“Getting a glass of water,” Alex said, walking to the kitchen. “What are you doing?” She looked at the TV, pretending to just now notice it as she got a glass of water. “Jerking off to the news anchor?” “What?” Justin said. His face was bright red. “No.”

Alex laughed. She couldn’t help herself. The way Justin was holding the throw blanket up to his chin like some kind of scandalized maiden was just too good. “Calm down, I’m just teasing,” she said. “I couldn’t sleep. Maybe that Fear Land place got to me more than I’d like to admit.”

“Well, I was getting ready to go up, but I could watch an episode of some dumb sit com with you, if you want,” Justin said.

“Sure,” Alex said, plopping down on the sofa beside him. She yawned and leaned back. “Give me some of that blanket.”

“Get your own.”

“No, the closet where Mom keeps the throw blankets is all the way upstairs,” Alex whined. “C’mon, share.”

“You’re so annoying,” Justin said, but he allowed her to pull some of the blanket over herself as she got comfy.

A few minutes later, Justin’s arm was on the back of the sofa, behind Alex’s head. They both had their feet up, sharing the coffee table as a footrest, and the throw blanket was pulled over them both. Some show about a comically dysfunctional family played over a laugh track was on TV. Alex found herself drifting off. Something about being in Justin’s presence and the sound of the TV helped her relax.

Alex had just faded away into comfy oblivion when Justin shifted and woke her up. She had drifted to sleep with her head resting against his shoulder. She yawned, to sleepy to sit up. “Mm, guess I should go up to bed.”

When Justin spoke, his voice was soft, and tired, but also there was something different about it than earlier. Something almost hesitant, or maybe hopeful. “This is ok.”

Alex sat up, laughing. “You want to explain to Mom and Dad why we fell asleep cuddling on the sofa?”

Justin frowned. “What? It’s not like we’re doing anything wrong. We both just couldn’t sleep. I don’t think they’d be too mad.”

Obviously, he was right. But something about the idea of waking up here made Alex nervous. She imagined she would see that look in her eyes that Mom sometimes got, like she was a little worried for some reason, or the rare quietness from Dad that sometimes happened, like when Alex jokingly tried to sit in Justin’s lap last family movie night and Dad said he wanted to sit by Alex and shut down any further jokes like that for the evening.

“Hey, I have a present for you,” Alex said. She dug in her pocket and got out the ring. “It’s from Uncle Kelbo. He wanted me to give it to you. I almost forgot.”

By now, the sit com was over and channel five was back on. Justin must’ve changed it while Alex was asleep. The news anchor he liked so much was talking about possible rain. Justin yawned and stretched. Alex definitely did not find the way his face scrunched up after a sleepy yawn adorable. That was just something dumb she wrote in one of those stupid prank letters to make fun of him.

“A present from Kelbo?” Justin asked. “Nice, those are always great.”

“Here, hold out your hand,” Alex said. Justin did so, and she slid the ring over his pointer finger.

Immediately, Justin’s mouth opened, and a sound emitted from it that was not at all like his voice. It was a very familiar sound though. Alex stared in utter amusement. Where was that music coming from? This was TOO good.

‘Day-o, day-o Daylight come, and we want go home Day, is a day, is a day, is a day, is a day, is a day-o Daylight come, and we want go home Work all night on a drink of rum Daylight come, and we want go home…’

Justin got up and began to do a dance to go along with the music. This was exactly like that famous scene in the movie Beetlejuice, except that Justin was alone in his dancing. Alex was left sitting on the sofa, losing it laughing. This was the best prank Kelbo had ever come up with and that was including the time he helped Alex and Max make Justin’s action figures all come to life and make fun of him. “Alex, I don’t know what’s happening!” Justin yelled. He was still dancing. Then, he was back to singing, except not in his own voice, but with the vocals and backup music of Harry Belafonte.

‘Stack banana 'til the morning come (Daylight come and we want go home) Come Mister tally man, tally me banana (Daylight come and we want go home) Come Mister tally man, tally me banana (Daylight come and we want go home) Lift six-foot, seven-foot, eight-foot bunch (Daylight come and we want go home) Six-foot, seven-foot, eight-foot bunch Daylight come, and we want go home!’

There was never any chance of the family sleeping through all this racket. Within minutes, Jerry and Theresa were on the stairs, both rubbing their eyes and looking exhausted. Max was right behind them. He appeared to be enamored.

“Aw, sick,” Max said. “Justin, you never told me you could sing and dance like that. You gotta teach me for the talent show!”

Alex was wheezing with laughter. Justin was staring at her with desperate horror in his eyes, and she decided to at last take pity on him. “Oh my god. “Okay, okay,” she said, still chuckling. “Take the ring off.”

Justin ripped the ring off his finger, and immediately had free reign of his body. He did a whole-body shudder. Alex was doubled over, tears streaming down her face from laughing. She couldn’t breathe. This was just too good. Justin looked furious and embarrassed and that meant she had enjoyed a successful evening.

“Young lady, we are going to have a serious talk about pranking your brother in the morning,” Jerry said, glaring. “It’s the middle of the night. You have school tomorrow! You know what? You are grounded. No going to the mall with Harper tomorrow.”

“But Daddy, I didn’t know what the ring would do,” Alex whined. “Uncle Kelbo gave it to me and told me to give it to Justin.”

“Okay, fine,” Jerry snapped. “No hanging out with my brother until I have a serious talk with him.”

“But, Dad-” Alex started.

“NO BUTS,” Jerry said.

Theresa frowned. “Jerry, it was just an innocent kid’s prank. Don’t you think you’re being a little harsh?”

“He took her to an eighteen plus amusement park,” Jerry said. “Now he’s helping her prank her brother like she needs any help in that department? He’s encouraging her to misuse magic, and I’m done with it.”

Alex was furious. She slammed the door to her bedroom and sat on her bed fuming for several minutes. This was so unfair. Maybe her dad won the wizard competition but that didn’t mean he understood magic so much better than Kelbo. Jerry and Justin both were always going on and on about the rules and following them to a T. At least Kelbo knew how to have fun.

A thought occurred to Alex, not for the first time, and she did her best to push it away. If she won the competition, she’d be just like Kelbo. Always using magic for her own gain whenever she wanted. But Justin was a lot more like their dad, who actually won. What if she didn’t always get to keep her powers?

This thought was always there, in the back of Alex’s mind, tainting her every interaction with Justin with the tension and jealousy of that insecurity. It didn’t so much get to her with Max, because he was so behind in the competition. On the outside, Alex never let these concerns show. She would rather die than let Justin know she was worried he would win and leave her in the dust. But it did get to her sometimes.

Anyway, right now Alex’s concern was about being cut off from her uncle. She grabbed her wand and dialed. “Beep, boop, beep, boop, beep.”

A minute later, Kelbo picked up. “Hey, Alex. I just got off the phone with your dad. It looks like you and I aren’t going to be able to hang out for a while. But listen, your dad will come around. We just need to give him some space and – oh, who am I kidding? I’ll sneak you out whenever you want.”

Alex laughed in relief. “Good to know. I was worried I would be totally cut off from you.”

“Never, kid,” Uncle Kelbo said.

“Hey, I did the prank on Justin,” Alex said. “Why did you act all mysterious anyway? All it did was make him sing that Banana Boat and dance. It was hilarious.”

“Listen, you gotta get Justin to wear that ring to school tomorrow,” Kelbo said. “I’m trying to prove a point here, and I need you to figure out what triggers the ring if we’re ever going to get there.”

“Huh?” Alex said. “Why are you acting all mysterious again?”

“Just get him to wear the ring to school.”

“Well, he’s never gonna do that,” Alex said. “He probably just threw it away.”

“No, no, no, that thing was so expensive,” Kelbo groaned. “I was saving it for a really good opportunity. Look, who will Justin listen to no matter what?”

Alex felt a sneaky idea form in her mind, and she grinned. “You know what? You just gave me a great idea.”

“It’s what I do best,” Kelbo said. “Now, call me tomorrow with an update.”

* *

“I’m sorry you can’t go, Alex, but it’s your own fault,” Harper said. “If you would just stop pulling pranks on Justin, maybe you wouldn’t be grounded so often.”

“Ugh, you are not being a very supportive best friend right now, Harper,” Alex grumbled. She was standing behind the counter at the substation, and Harper was sitting on a stool facing her.

“Look, I’ll try to get you that cute sweater you liked so much,” Harper said. “How’s that?”

Alex perked up and smiled. “Like maybe you’re a much better friend than I thought.”

The bell dinged as the door to the substation opened. Justin entered, whistling as he walked. Alex hadn’t seen him much at school. They passed each other in the hall, but that was it. So, she had no idea if her plan had worked.

This morning, there was a very special news report from the channel five anchor about how mood rings were SUPER popular right now and all the cute guys were wearing them. It only broadcast to one household in New York, but Justin didn’t have to know that. Thanks to the ‘manipulate screens’ spell from last week’s wizard lesson, Alex was able to make it look like the news lady was saying whatever she wanted her to say. This was a good trick, and Alex was going to have to remember it for future use.

“Oh, there’s Justin,” Harper said. She looked down at her dress, which was covered in plastic assortments of fruits. “How do I look?”

“Um….” Alex said, unsure how to respond to that.

“Hey Alex, hey, Harper,” Justin said as he approached.

Harper immediately screamed and dove under a nearby table. Since this was a normal reaction for her, Justin just shrugged, and walked behind the counter, getting himself a soda. He was still whistling a jaunty tune.

“Hey, Justin,” Alex said. “How was school?”

“Good,” Justin said. “I passed my algebra exam with flying colors, and-” he stopped and gave Alex a suspicious look. “You don’t care how my day at school was, do you?”

Alex scoffed. “What? I so care. I always ask you how your day was.”

“Especially when you have some scheme cooking,” Justin said, narrowing his eyes. “What did you do?”

“Nothing!” Alex said. “Um, out of curiosity, did you wear that mood ring?”

“Yeah, I did,” Justin said. “The news lady on channel five said – hey!” He glared. “You tricked me!”

“Well, it obviously didn’t do any good,” Alex said with a disappointed sigh. “I guess nothing happened.”

“No, it didn’t,” Justin said. “And you are so annoying for trying to prank me again! You know, Alex, sometimes it’s like your life revolves around tormenting me.”

Alex grinned. “And isn’t that just such a compliment?”

Justin glared. “You are the worst. I swear- DAY-OU!”

The music was back. Alex burst into laughter. Luckily for her, no one else except Harper was in the substation. Harper got out from under the table, looking very confused. Alex supposed that she should be trying to figure out a way to explain this to Harper. Right now, though, she was unable to do anything but crack up. With any luck, Justin would get nervous and do the explaining for her. The bell dinged and the substation door opened. A man entered. His eyes went wide, and he stared at Justin, who was now dancing to the music.

‘Daylight come and we want go home Day, is a day, is a day, is a day, is a day, is a day-o Daylight come, and we want go home!’

The potential customer backed away outside and let the door shut again. Alex saw him take off running down the street. Harper was pointing at Justin with a shaky hand. Her jaw was hanging open and she looked terrified. Alex was aware that she was possibly in trouble. However, all she could do was laugh because the sight of Justin singing and dancing was just too good.

Justin ripped the ring off his finger. “ALEX I’m going to KILL-” Justin stopped mid-sentence. He looked at Harper and forced himself to be composed. Oh, good. He was going to weasel out of this so Alex didn’t have to. God, Alex loved him. “I am going to KILL at the talent show,” Justin said. He forced a huge grin. “Isn’t that such a cool talent that I’ve developed all by myself with no magic, Harper?”

“Uh,” Harper said. “Yep.” She was back to her usual awkward, blushing self around Justin, looking shy and giggly. “Wow. You really learned how to make music come out of your mouth for the talent competition? You’re so talented.”

“Yep,” Justin said. “That’s right. Okay, now, I have to practice some more. So, goodbye.”

“But, the substation just opened for dinner. It’s only four o’clock.”

“Wow! How the time flies!” Justin said, ushering Harper out the door. “Great talking to you. See ya tomorrow.”

Alex was back to giggling. Justin turned around and glared at her, and she tried to look serious. “Justin, I’m really sorry.” She couldn’t maintain her composure and started laughing again. “But that was too good. Maybe you really should audition for the talent competition!”

A while later, Alex was lying on the sofa flipping through a teen magazine. She had just done a quiz on whether she was compatible with her crush for fun. She didn’t have a crush right now, because Riley was going out with Gigi, and she was grossed out by that. So, she answered all the questions inserting Justin as the hypothetical other person in each scenario. The answer she got was that she and her crush were sure to have a rocky and possibly doomed but very fun and exciting romance and that it was definitely worth giving it a shot even if there would be heartache and speedbumps along the way. Huh. Interesting. Alex supposed that did describe her and Justin’s dynamic pretty well. Minus the romance, obviously.

Alex jumped in alarm when she was joined by someone else in the room without warning. Uncle Kelbo had just flashed into the room with magic. He was coughing and waving smoke away as he got reacclimated from teleporting through space and town.

Alex sat up and tossed her magazine to the side. “Uncle Kelbo, what are you doing here?”

“I just got done talking to your dad,” Kelbo said. “Your mom calmed him down and we’re allowed to hang out again as long as I stop helping you prank your brother.”

“Great,” Alex said, beaming. She had known her dad would come around eventually, but it was relief that it happened so fast. Then she hesitated. “Wait, you’re not really going to stop helping me prank Justin, right?”

“Of course not,” Kelbo said, waving a dismissive hand. “Now, listen. I want to know everything about what happened today.”

Alex grinned. “Justin serenaded me and Harper with the Banana Boat song after school. It was great.”

“Yeah,” Kelbo said. “Now I think it’s time you knew what the ring really does. It casts a spell on the wearer so that whoever has it on sings the Banana Boat song whenever they experience strong romantic feelings.”

Alex stared at Kelbo. “Wait….”

“Yeah, take that in,” Kelbo said. “It’s a lot, I know. But now that I know it’s reciprocated, I can help you-”

“Yeah, that makes sense,” Alex interrupted.

“Oh, okay, good,” Kelbo said, blinking in surprise. “I thought this was going to take way more convincing.”

“Wait, only the first time makes sense,” Alex said. “Justin was watching that channel five news anchor lady he like so much on TV.”

“Not her,” Kelbo groaned, smacking his forehead. “Alex, he was obviously experiencing feelings for-”

“HARPER?” Alex interrupted, aghast. She wasn’t sure why the idea upset her so much. After all, Harper had been into Justin forever. Shouldn’t Alex be happy for her as her best friend? “I can’t believe Justin has a crush on Harper,” she said. “Well, I guess now it’s up to me to get them together.”

* *

“Are you sure I can trust you about this?” Justin asked.

“For the last time, I’m telling you the truth,” Alex said. “I even let you do a truth spell on me to prove it.”

“That’s true,” Justin said. “But it’s just so strange. I never knew I had feelings for Harper.”

“Well, maybe you were burying them deep down,” Alex said.

“I guess,” Justin said, though he still looked uncertain. “And you really think the yogurt shop is a good place for us to go on a date? I’m leaving if she wears her yogurt themed outfit. Last time she followed me around in that thing for a day, I couldn’t get the smell of sour yogurt out of my nostrils for a week.”

Alex made a face. “Fair point. I’ll call her and make sure she doesn’t wear that.”

They were in the sub-car, after school. Alex was helping Justin get ready for the big date with Harper. No one else was in the sub-car. There were a few customers at tables in the substation. Luckily, Alex had put the serving wench charm on Max, so he was doing a great job. She would’ve felt a little bad, but he was making a killing in tips, so she figured he’d be alright.

“Alright,” Alex said, sitting at the table. “So, like we agreed, let’s practice.”

“I don’t know about this, Alex,” Justin said. “I mean, practicing for a date with Harper? She’s probably going to throw out some random fun facts about things she discovered while secretly watching me sleep or something.”

“Stop,” Alex said, getting serious. “Justin, I know she’s kind of weird, but she’s my best friend and if you hurt her I’ll have to hurt you. Look, I want you and Harper both to be happy. So please, just take this seriously.”

“Alright, alright,” Justin said. He sat down at the table and folded his hands in front of him. “Hi, Harper. Welcome to our date.”

Alex snorted. “Welcome to our date? What is this, a talk show? Just act natural. Why aren’t you wearing the ring?”

“Act natural?” Jutin repeated. “I don’t know how to act natural around Harper. I’m used to her screaming and running away when she sees me. Anyway, I’m pretty sure singing the Banana Boat song on our date isn’t considered natural.”

“Okay, true,” Alex said, laughing. “But it would be pretty funny.”

“Now I’m the one who needs to take this seriously?” Justin asked, snorting.

“Okay, okay,” Alex said. She cleared her throat and spoke in an imitation of Harper. “Hi, Justin.” She giggled and twirled her hair. “Thanks for coming.”

“You’re welcome,” Justin said. “I mean, uh, why don’t I come sit by you?”

A moment later, Justin was on the bench beside Alex in the sub-car. He put an arm around her, and sat very close, with his face near hers. “You look really pretty.”

Alex felt butterflies in her belly dance, and her cheeks were suddenly very warm. “Okay,” she said with a soft laugh. “Since when are you Mr. Charisma?”

“I can be romantic when I want to be,” Justin said. “You just never see that side of me.”

“I wonder why not,” Alex said, shooting him a mischievous smirk.

“I think it’s obvious why not,” Justin said, laughing.

Suddenly, they were joined by Kelbo and a lot of smoke. He waved his hand in front of his face, coughing up a storm. Alex and Justin both did the same.

“Uncle Kelbo, what are you doing here?” Justin asked.

“Okay, fine,” Kelbo said. “I did a spell so I could spy on you two after I found out Alex was trying to set you up with Harper.”

“What?” Alex said. “Why?”

“Because!” Kelbo said. “You’re both clearly never going to figure this out without my help. Look, Justin, just put on the ring right now.”

Justin frowned and dug in his jeans pocket. He put on the ring. Alex felt her jaw drop. No way. The gears in her brain whirred as she tried to process what exactly was happening and what it meant. It’s not like she hadn’t had inklings before. But she could never articulate it. Even now, she was afraid to put it into words in her own brain, what it meant that the ring was activated right now.

Justin ripped the ring off his finger and threw it on the ground. His expression was intense, and horrified. Alex found herself tense. Every muscle in her body was like a live wire. She was afraid to breathe. Justin was still seated on the bench, very close to her.

“I can’t believe it,” Justin said.

“I know,” Alex said, surprised at how steady her voice came out. She had always been good at acting like she was okay even when she wasn’t. She met Justin’s eyes, her heart pounding. “I can’t either.”

“I have feelings for Uncle Kelbo?” Justin said.

Alex and Uncle Kelbo both groaned. Alex smacked Justin on the shoulder. “You do not have feelings for Uncle Kelbo, you big dummy!”

Justin laughed, looking a bit breathless and very relieved. “Okay, your reaction right now proves that you’re not exactly upset about – um – what this means.”

“And, with that, I’m gonna leave you two with these,” Kelbo said. He set two tickets on the table. “These will get you into Zero Gravity, the wizard world club. I heard there’s a romantic ballad tonight and a floating dance for all the couples out there. Anyway, I’m gonna go. And if either of you ever tell your parents I was involved with helping you figure this out, I’ll turn you both into worms.”

With that, Kelbo was gone in a puff of smoke. Alex was alone with Justin in the sub-car. She was surprised to hear Justin mutter a spell as he coughed away the smoke. He was usually so careful with magic and refused to do anything without Dad’s permission. Suddenly though, every window in the sub-car was blocked by black curtains.

“You just did a spell,” Alex said, staring at Justin with wide eyes. “A spell outside the lair. Without supervision.”

“I was actually, uh, thinking maybe we could use a minute without supervision,” Justin said. He looked very nervous. “Are you – are we okay? Seriously.”

“You know, Justin, I’ve never been very good with talking about these things,” Alex said. “So, let me answer that with action.”

Then she was kissing him. Alex had thought about this, in her deepest, darkest, most private fantasies. She had pictured what it would be like, but never admitted to herself what she was doing. She always waved it off as a random, errant dirty thought that meant nothing. Now Justin’s lips were pressed against hers, and his hands were tangled in her hair, and it was better than she could’ve ever imagined. This was worth every conflict and moment of heartache and possible disaster that was surely awaiting them if they pursued it. There was no doubt in Alex’s mind about that.

When they parted for air, Justin’s hand was on her cheek. He looked breathless and anxious and excited. “Okay, good answer.”

“We’re gonna have to thank Uncle Kelbo later for helping me prank you,” Alex said, grinning. “This turned out to be a really good prank.”

#jalex #wowp #jalex wowp #wowp rewatch #alex russo #justin russo #alex x justin #my god i'm really writing jalex fanfic in the year 2024 xD #love that for me. just to be clear #also i wrote that whole emo poem about channeling my trauma into my writing earlier & I want to be clear #THAT IS NOT ABOUT THIS LMAO #more like. vague horrific feelings in my horror writing. okay? Just to be clear lmaooo #this is intended to read like an actual episode of the show #if the writers were brave #i'm pretty happy with the characterization for the most part #but it's totally unedited so #u know we die like stevie or whatever #no beta

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