#your new life will cost you your old life

[dissociation-station123]

More than an Acquaintance

LADS: Sylus X Reader

~

It has been a month or two since Sylus walked into the bar. Each week you walked in he sat in your spot with confidence as if it was his all along. Slowly his eyes began to become less serious and melancholy after each greeting. Though you barely spoke much. Still the same old surface level conversations with a few more words added each time. Nothing has deterred you from your normalcy or routine.

You felt yourself slowly becoming more comfortable around him. Those warning alarms in your mind when you first encountered him dulled. He became a part of the scene of your life. Someone who didn’t know you but acknowledged you.

You did notice that the bar had got a bit more crowded than usual, people drawn in by his model-like looks. Hopeful for a chance to take him home. He always declined them in a way that still made them feel wanted. His social ability was admirable. Your curiosity peaked each time he denied an attractive person’s advances. A simple shrug your way and a raised glass is always his response.

He was an enigma. A puzzle that your brain needed to figure out. Yet you could not find a way to do so. The complexities of conversation are exhausting and you just wanted to relax, in the bar you claimed. So you simply existed in his presence.

Until he decided to set his sights on you. He was a storm you were not prepared for. You were comfortable standing in the water up to your ankles, unaware that letting him in your life, it was a sandbar.

~

“Y/N I refuse to allow you to pay.” Sylus shoves that damn black card in your face once again. You scowl which only amuses him further. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“This feels like I’m taking advantage of you. I can afford my drinks.” You rebuttal but he waves a hand in your direction and hands his card to the bartender who laughs. You sigh heavily but the moment the glass arrives you happily take a sip.

You look over and he chuckles, you roll your eyes. “Such a brat…” He mutters and you bite your cheek. His banter towards you recently has become more playful. Yet based on your observations, it seems to be some kind of defense he uses, so you haven’t given it much thought.

“Try this.” Sylus passes his glass over to you and stares down expectantly. Your eyes narrow as you assess why. He scoffs in amusement, “Tell her I didn’t poison it.” He motions towards the bartender who cackles in response.

“He paid to have this whiskey imported. Just got it in this morning. It’s top tier. Worth a try.” She smiles kindly, bringing over a new glass and setting it in front of you, pouring the contents into the bottle.

You swirl the liquor and then bring it to your lips. You look up and he is watching with a content expression. Waiting patiently for your critique. You take a sip with caution. Your eyes widen as you swallow. It is very smooth. The burn is satisfying and not harsh like the usual cheap bourbon you drink. “Mmm…” You nod with satisfaction.

He looks pleased with himself after your response. “One of my favorites. I knew you would appreciate it.” You take a longer drink humming. You give him a thumbs up and he chuckles.

“Please refrain from telling me how much this cost you. It would make me enjoy it less.” You warn him with a glare and he smiles brightly.

“I love seeing the expressions you make when I ruin things for you. One of the reasons I keep coming back here.” He teases you ruffling your hair, his light touch no longer fazing you.

“Sadist.” You mutter but you smirk as you finish off the fancy whiskey. The bottle still sits between you so he pours you more. You glance at him and he just nods, letting you know it’s fine. You gladly drink oblige.

You want to ask him why he came here. What brought him through that dingy wooden door. It felt like a line that both of you weren’t ready to cross just yet.

“It cost…” you gasp and reach up covering his mouth in a panic. His eyes crinkle with mirth, his lips soft against your palm.

“Sylus…” You warn and then feel his teeth dig into your flesh gently. “What are you, a dog?” You remove your hand chastising him and he laughs.

“Sweetie, I’ve been called that and more.” His voice drips with seduction, naturally. You almost feel jealous about how easy it is for him. How easy it is to make your skin heat up with a string of words and tone.

You roll your eyes, your frustration directed more to yourself than to him. Your fumbling and awkward demeanor forever being called cute.

“What are you thinking about?” Sylus leans closer, as he sips. Those red eyes scanning your face in curiosity. You shove him away but he still waits for an answer, never offended.

“Nothing.” You say the usual reply and pour more. He clicks his teeth. “Everything. All at once.” You continue and he looks intrigued, resting his chin on his hand.

“The curse of the overthinker.” He says and you nod. “Must be difficult.” You nod unable to maintain eye contact. “It’s better to just live in the moment. You should give it a try sometime.”

A prickle of irritation runs down your spine. “As if it’s that easy.” You growl not meaning to sound so annoyed. This does not deter Sylus, it almost looks as if it excites him.

“It could be.” His voice so matter of fact, you mock him. Your body freezes as he grabs your chin and tilts it towards him forcing you to face him. “Don’t be such a wimp.”

Rage bubbled to the surface, the kind that had been building up for years. A dam that had been battered and never repaired. The cracks slowly leaking over time, bursting to life. “That look is intoxicating.” The arrogant bastard spouted out with a twisted mannerism.

“You are fucked up Sylus. I’m sure that’s how you ended up here at this shitty bar.” You say venom laced in your words which only made him smile larger.

“A similar broken soul.” He says nonchalantly with a shrug. “I wish I could wear my expressions as freely as you do.” He admits his face showing nothing.

“You could.” You say condescendingly, “You're just a wimp.” You grab the bottle from the counter and take a long swig directly. This conversation seemed dangerous. A rough way of getting to truly know each other.

His eyes lower for a millisecond. Then he releases your chin and his whole body shakes as he laughs, a genuine sound. It bounces around the empty bar.

“Closing time.” The bartender reminds us as you continue to grimace at him. She nervously looks back and forth. You take in a breath, burying the anger as fast as it had appeared.

“Already…” Sylus mutters looking at his phone surprised. “That’s a shame.” He almost looks truly disappointed. You felt bad for snapping back at him.

“Are you hungry?” You ask him and his eyebrows raise. “Well?” You begin to gather your things as he processes your question.

“Are you inviting me back to your place?” He asks cheekily and you groan. You elbow him as he tries to move closer.

“Hell no! There is a pizza truck down the street.” You counter as the bartender closes his tab and tosses the empty bottle of expensive whiskey in the trash. You see her laugh, you both become a form of entertainment for her.

“That makes more sense. You would never be so bold.” He says as he starts following you out. You turn to him, crossing your arms.

“Are you hungry or not? Cuz this can be goodnight.” You stand tall even as he towers over you. “But it seems you weren’t ready for the night to end yet. Need to be distracted from something a bit longer.”

A strange silence fills the space between you. You see him contemplating if he has let you get too close. “So clever. Yes I can eat.” He opens the door for you and you walk out without a response.

~

You watch him stare at the grease as he lifts the large slice of pizza. “It won’t kill you.” You say as you take a large bite and make a pleased sound. The bread is the perfect combo to soak up the alcohol.

“Says you…” He whispers, hesitant but takes a tiny bite. You smile when he goes for a bigger one quickly after.

The metal bench was cold even through your jeans, the air felt good against your flush face. The night was quiet as you both ate without speaking another word. The strange comfort of having someone beside you is nice for a change. You admit you weren’t ready to go home either.

“You are a kind person.” Sylus speaks up taking you by surprise. You see he has finished his food in record time.

“You don’t know me.” You say matter of fact. Your thoughts tell you differently. Everyday bombarding you with mistakes from your past. This man, this stranger who appeared could not understand.

“It’s your actions. I can tell that those who see you regularly appreciate you.” He continues, and you don’t know how to respond. You don’t want to accept this.

“You never once make me feel unwelcomed. I know you could tell I was bad news the moment your eyes landed on me.” He explains as you finish your slice. You hold out your hand to take his napkin to toss. He grabs it and kisses your knuckles brazenly.

“Napkin weirdo.” You scold him and he chuckles, handing it to you. You get up and throw them away. Sitting back down and lifting the water bottle to your lips you take a long gulp.

“I want to get to know you.” Sylus blurts out and you finally look up at him. He looks like when you first met him, stoic and serious. “Don’t you dare utter why.” His voice is demanding and leaves no room to rebuttal.

“Why should I get to know you?” You ask instead. You see him processing your question. Giving it true consideration. You sense he was not used to others questioning him.

“It would be fun. Probably unhealthy and addictive. Just like your bourbon.” He was so confident. Shame probably was not a concept he could comprehend. It was damn intriguing.

“Tell me why you walked into the bar.” You borrow his temerity, wearing it for a second. It felt foreign and strange but not wrong.

“Love.” He says the word like a curse. You are taken back by the pure disgust on his face. So much emotion, you wonder what that feels like.

“So a broken heart then?” You ask and he just nods. “One sided?” Sylus bites his lip and if his expression was not so somber you would have found it attractive.

“Have you ever been in love?” He does not answer but counters. The past creeps up into your peripheral and you cringe. “That was a yes.”

“I was married once.” You answer, “But not sure if it was love. I felt numb most of the time. Or anxious.” He frowns at your statement, a slight sense of anger lingered in his eyes for a second.

“You didn’t deserve that.” You turn to him with a flat expression. He looks back still so assured. It pissed you off now. The way this man could ignite the flames long put out.

“I could have. Stop assuming.” You shiver as the wind turns bitter. You look at the time and sigh. “I like it when you're at the bar.” You finally admit and he nods.

“I’m glad I walked in.” He responds, again the calm silence. “It’s getting late. Let me walk you home.” He stands looking to the sky at the moon above. He looks weary and forlorn. Yet so very beautiful. There is no way he was real.

“I can walk by myself. This is my turf anyways. I’m not too far.” You explain stretching. The food settling nicely, your mind not clouded by the haze of liquor now.

“There has been some increase in muggings in this area. Let me feel like a good guy just this once.” You nod and he thanks you. You walk next to each other shoulders inches apart. You know he is slowing his pace based on his long legs. He was thoughtful even if he wanted to be painted as the opposite.

“Here we are. Have a goodnight Y/N.” Lost in your thoughts you arrived home quicker than expected. On autopilot you look around and then thank him.

“Night.” You say and go to place your key in the door. As you turn to open it you come to a realization. Sylus leads you to your door as if he had walked it before. You turned around but he was already down the street. The warning bells that first alerted you rang again but there was this strange tingle in your chest, possible excitement?

[ki-kink]

I got a strange package in the mail today. It was a purple tracksuit kit and a pair of white tube socks. I would never wear something like that so i thought i got someone else's package but my name was written on the box.... I have a weird urge to put it on......

Dude, did you totally miss that invite in the rad purple envelope chillin' in the box? It's the premiere of a sick new action flick. "Rock that violet swag, bro" is added in handwriting. You've got zero plans that night. So, why not, right?

You're kinda hanging back. People are struttin' down the red carpet in a freakin' flash of lights. You're feelin' a bit out of your element. That's when you spot the dude who's just as clueless as you are. Rocking a purple tracksuit. You go up to him and strike up a convo. Turns out, he got the same package too. You both feel kinda silly. But you muster up some courage and hit that red carpet together!

Oh my friggin' God, it feels so freakin' awesome in the spotlight, like YAS queen! You're gettin' more and more confident. "Dude, unzip those dang zippers!" You don't gotta tell me twice, bro. You and your homie are damn proud of those hard-earned muscles. And your tats cost a freakin' ton of cash. It'd be criminal to hide 'em. Owen is a friggin' poser. He's makin' his pecs dance and flexin' those rock-hard abs. Well, you ain't gotta tell me twice, gonna follow his lead, BAM!

Oh my god, like, seriously, this pre-fight showdown is, like, totally part of the gig. Owen and you, you guys are, like, total pros. Flexing those muscles, spitting out aggressive one-liners, hurling insults like there's no tomorrow. Who cares if you end up screwing each other later or sucking each other off. Before the fight, you gotta put on a freakin' show. Two ultimate jerk-off fantasies, oozing testosterone from every pore. And you're the freakin' stars of the fight cage. People want a show? Well, people are gonna get a show, baby!

Yo, Owen and you have been straight hustlin' since y'all were four years old. Y'all met in the orphanage, ain't nobody handed you nothin' in life. But whatever you needed, you took it. Sometimes legit through grindin' hard. Sometimes, not so much, who even cares? Today, y'all are the ultimate icons of the Mixed Martial Arts scene. And purple is your signature swag.

[driedlavenderandsage]

I know you wouldn't like me now anyways.

I live in the way they warned you about,

My fleshly and immoral life.

Living authentically never came easy, we all had so much doubt.

I was always more sure.

I knew there would be a day you all would realize I'm not His child the way you are.

But I still find myself longing for the quiet moments when there was no fear of God with us.

When, for a moment, we all would feel so human, and so warm

Happy in all of our imperfections.

I know you wouldn't like me anymore, but I still laugh at the memories, and the only prayer I say now is that you remember me just as fondly.

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

It’s not that Jason forgot, per se.

But between smuggling a toddler out of the League of Assassins, trekking halfway across the world, and finding a suitable hiding place that’s also child friendly… well, it kind of slipped his mind that he’s supposed to be… dead.

Something that comes back to bite him in the ass when he takes Dami out for some ice cream and just so happens to run into non other than Brucie-fucking-Wayne

[palaceoftears]

S3! Mahidevran sultan + The burden of love and duty

I'm ready to burn in hell to keep you safe.

Orla Gartland / Anne Carson / Japanese Breakfast / Benjamin Alire Sáenz / Margaret Atwood / Sarah Kinsley

[vossn]

.

[talkorsomething]

I have Got to get more transgender

[daz4i]

let me preface this by clarifying i am not anti therapy in any way whatsoever and in fact encourage people to get therapy if they can and even go the extra step to help friends find the right type of therapy that may help them

ok now that that's out of the way.

therapy is bullshit man you go to a therapist saying "hey. i wanna kill myself. can you help me stop wanting to kill myself somehow?" and they go "sure! first step, stop wanting to kill yourself" and you say "well i can't. that's why i came to you. bc i don't know. how to stop wanting to kill myself" and they'll say "that's a shame. i can't help you if you want to kill yourself. that'll be 125$ please"

[soldateins]

i've been getting the urge to uproot certain parts of my life this year hardcore, and i've resisted those urges for years but this is the strongest they've ever been and i kind of just want to give in and do it and see what happens because i feel so restricted in my life

[eluvixnsarchived]

CHEWS A STRAW AS I REMIND MYSELF OTHER PEOPLES FEELINGS ARE NOT MY RESPONSIBILITY TO MANAGE AND IF I AM AT FAULT IN SOMEWAY IT IS THEIR RESPONSIBILITY TO COMMUNICATE THAT WITH ME FIRST BC COMMUNICATION IS IMPORTANT AND BEING SHIT WITH ME AND MAKING IT A GUESSING GAME INSTEAD IS PETTY AND NOT MY PROBLEM

[averruncusho]

I think it all started when I was born.

Maybe the astrology people were right. Maybe your fate is directed by whichever star you’re born under, on whichever date you took your first breath.

If so, I imagine that every other baby born alongside me 23 years ago isn’t doing well right now. I wish I could find them, make a support group together- maybe they’d understand me, for a change.

I grew up pretty normally. I remember getting stung by fire ants in my house, watching the occasional toucan on the trees outside, and cycling to the wet market at 7am.

When we were bored we played tikam-tikam, and winning just half a ringgit was enough to make my day. Our house was small, our village had only one internet access port, and we were happy.

I’m typing this from the 60th floor of the financial district right now, where I’m working, and the view is amazing. If I had stayed in my village, I would never have believed that buildings could grow higher than 10 stories.

Growing up in Singapore was different. Wayyy different. You often hear that the city moves faster, but I don’t think that’s exactly true; the city only moves with urgency, because everything matters now. If you’re not moving, you’re flatlining. Get good grades, join a good club, get a good internship, and buy a happy life. The Singaporean guide to success.

Honestly, I prefer it to my village. We grew up poor, and in Malaysia I envied the rich for their luck. Here in Singapore I was poor too, but only for a while; here the rationality of meritocracy pushed me up, higher than I thought possible- 59 stories, to be exact.

I genuinely can’t pinpoint when my life started running on these tracks, or when I realised that I was born to suffer. Perhaps it was 23 years ago, under that star. Maybe it was all those nights I covered my ears as my parents fought in my room. I wonder if that changed my brain’s chemistry at all.

Maybe it was when my parents abandoned me in a forest at 2am. Maybe it was when I was sent to the ER by my brother. Maybe it was when I realised the undercurrent of discomfort running through me every second of every hour of every day was called gender dysphoria.

Whatever the reason, it’s all fallen into place like Tetris, and it feels like my game is ending. The ceiling is coming for me, and as the odds stack against me I cannot help but feel blessed. I walk through life isolated from troubles, materially rich and spiritually alone. Nothing will ever touch me like it did again.

I walk through life isolated. Nothing will ever touch me again.

[upmala]

woke up from a dream about my grandparents’ house, convinced i’m in my old apartment in riga. i’m about to get up and creep to the kitchen to make my morning tea, trying not to wake the gentle warm shape still sleeping… my feet tracing a familiar line over the textures of temperate carpet and cold smooth laminate… everything is as familiar as the landscape of my own skin.

but the light from the windows hits from the wrong side. the mattress is too hard. there’s no warm presence by my side. huh? oh. oh.

[blueberryspyder]

I am unwell,,, I have unlocked an inner joy I shut away after graduating high school and feel an intense love and enthusiasm for the first time in literally seven years…….

…..and it’s beCAUSE OF A FICTIONAL 30-SOMETHING BISEXUAL ARCHIVIST

[hella1975]

bagged a trial shift at a new pub just for my manager to immediately put on facebook if anyone wants an extra shift on wednesday. he knows what im doing

[reanimare]

me @ me: what's a-- (squints) ...tumblr?

[heba-baker]

Hello 👋

Vetted by @90-ghost

Link

Hello, I am Heba Al-Anqar, 21 years old, a university student. My university was suspended due to the war. I am writing about my family: my father Bakr (54 years old), my mother Alaa (46 years old), and my sisters Aya (18 years old), Amal (15 years old), Muhammad (13 years old), and Maryam (8 years old). We have faced many challenges in this war, from the destruction of our home to the famine we continue to suffer in northern Gaza.

My father suffers from heart problems. He had open-heart surgery when he was 36 years old. He also suffers from cartilage problems. He had his pelvic joint replaced about two years ago, in addition to other health problems. He cannot work due to his health condition.

My mother also suffers from asthma and shortness of breath, in addition to the difficulty of obtaining treatment due to the conditions and the war.

This is our house, which was destroyed by war

We have become homeless in places of refuge, in addition to the difficulty of obtaining medicine, food, and daily expenses

I created this account to request your help in this difficult ordeal by donating to meet the necessary needs, as we were relying on social assistance before the war.

My goal is to help my family live in safety and provide the necessary necessities for living, as there is a high cost of living and difficulty in obtaining necessities. We ask for your help in leaving the Gaza Strip to save my family’s life. The cost of travel is $5,000 per adult and $2,500 per child, in addition to travel and accommodation expenses of $500 per month.

Together, we can support Heba and her family through this ordeal. Your donation, no matter how big, can make a difference in my family's life to get life and start a new life

If you are looking to support Heba and her family, please consider providing assistance directly or through relevant charitable organizations.