#your message is right and it deserves to be heard so send it this way
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If you’re not voting blue because of Palestine tell Biden that.
They need to know that while they still have the power to do better, it will be too late for Palestine after the election.
#vote#vote blue#Biden#Palestine#I believe that Trump is a threat to the US and the world#if he gets into power he will establish himself as a dictator and you will not get a chance to vote in a leftist in the next election#you will not get a chance to do ranked voting#you will not be able to organise#there might not be a chance to make a more leftist party that actually represents you#so instead of just arguing with you to vote I need you to send to ur message to Biden so he can change#At election time people who didn’t vote because of the horrible policies in Palestine#will be indistinguishable from those who didn’t vote because they like both candidates#your message is right and it deserves to be heard so send it this way
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what you know - ch11: scars || r. sukuna
❦ ryomen sukuna x f!reader [college au] [ongoing series]
❝ you've heard his reputation and you've seen first-hand the way he's late to class if he even bothers to show up. paired with him for the most important project of the year, you choose to give him the benefit of the doubt- but maybe that's more than he deserves when your perfect grades depend on him, or maybe there's more to the aloof and irritable sukuna than meets the eye. ❞
❦ cw ; mdni, 18+ only. contains explicit sexual themes and content. use of alcohol. use of cannabis. use of nicotine/cigarettes. angst. hurt/no comfort. hurt/comfort. implied injury. family trauma. smut. slow burn. anxiety. panic attacks. mentions of difficulty eating. vomit. tags will be updated as series continues.
❦ additional tags ; college parties and themes. sukuna ooc warning as this is a realistic take on modern sukuna. reader is fairly preppy and implied to be smaller than sukuna, but he's 6"11.
❦ words ; 15.3k.
❦ a/n ; please note the tags have been updated. see you at the bottom!
main masterlist || series masterlist || previous chapter || next chapter
Your eyes flutter open to the silence of your empty apartment. Your blankets envelop you in a deep and heavy cocoon as sunlight filters through the blinds. It should be warm, but your limbs are chilled with the remnants of your grief following the argument with Sukuna the night before.
Right.
Sighing, you move languidly to rub at your eyes, blinking them a few times to rid them of the groggy feeling that plagues you. Your limbs feel as though they’re being dragged down by weights as each movement proves to be an effort. As your vision clears and you find yourself staring at the ceiling, it occurs to you it’s too well-lit for you to have woken up before your alarm.
Pushing yourself up on your elbow, you sigh as your muscles protest against every movement. Flipping your phone up to face you, you find yourself blinking at the time, unable to process just how exactly you managed to sleep through the blaring of your alarm.
By three hours.
Clearly that had caught Kento’s attention as well, as he’d left a voicemail, called twice, and sent a number of texts. Even with all the turmoil in your life lately, you haven’t missed a class, so clearly a few alarm bells had gone off for your friend.
Plopping back down into the plush of your pillows, you groan and rub your eyes again.
It’s hard to tell exactly how long you lay there before grabbing your phone to check your messages. You don’t even have the energy to listen to the voicemail, heading straight to your text thread with him.
Friday 8:33 AM - Kento || Hi. It’s unlike you to be late. Is everything alright?
Friday 9:31 AM - Kento || Do you need a hand with anything?
Friday 9:58 AM - Kento || I’m getting concerned. Please reply to something to let me know you’re alright.
Friday 10:04 AM - Kento || Please answer my calls. Send me a text. Something to let me know you’re okay.
Friday 10:13 AM - Kento || That’s it. I’m on my way.
Oh, fuck.
Your eyes flicker up to the time. 10:28 AM. If he’s walking from campus, chances are he’ll be at your door at any second. You would think that would be the push you need to get out of bed, but you can’t physically bring yourself to do so. Somehow, sitting and staring at the ceiling feels like the better option here.
Well, no. It doesn’t. But no amount of willpower will move your body from the blankets that envelop you in a warm hug. They’re the closest thing you have to comfort when your eyes burn and your throat’s dry from the amount of tears cried the previous night.
That’s not even beginning to mention the onset of the headache beginning to hammer at your brain.
Unfortunately, the comfort doesn’t last long when there’s a knock at your door in time with the pounding of your head. Kento’s muffled but familiar voice calls your name, but all you can do is stare at the ceiling.
You want to be alone. You don’t particularly feel like listening to Kento or Shoko’s ‘I told you so’ speech, or how either of them are going to teach Sukuna a lesson. It won’t ease your melancholy and it certainly won’t ease your guilt. That’s not to say you don’t appreciate the thought, but your bed is more appealing right now than being dragged to campus or out for a meal.
Another rap at the door. Another call of your name.
Still, you blankly stare at the ceiling, one arm draped over your middle clutching your phone. You feel bad, guilty, for ignoring Kento after he walked all this way in the cold, but you can pay him back later.
For now, you just need a day to yourself.
Unfortunately, Kento doesn’t seem to agree with you.
Your phone vibrates in your hand as it rings, Kento’s name flashing across the screen. You groan again, rolling onto your side as you hit the green button.
“Hello?” Your voice is raw, cracking at the end of the one word you manage to utter out.
“Hi. Did you receive my texts? I was worried when you didn’t reply, but you don’t sound well.”
Dragging your hands roughly across your features, you contemplate telling him you’re sick, but it doesn’t sit well in your gut to lie to your friend after ignoring him. “I did, sorry. I slept through my alarm.”
“I see.” You can vaguely hear his voice outside your door still, but you can’t bring yourself to move. “Are you sick?”
Yes. Yes. Yes. “No.”
There’s a pause on the other end of the line before Kento seems to make up his mind. “Let me in. I know you’re inside.”
“It’s fine, I’ll get ready and-”
The tone he uses as he says your name has you throwing your head back against the pillow. It’s the kind of tone that mimics one your mother might have used on you as a child, and if this were anyone aside from Kento, you might have had more to say. Unfortunately, he’s a very convincing (and often relentless) man.
“Fine. One moment.”
Flipping onto your back again, you stare at the ceiling for a second longer, which turns into a minute longer, which turns into more knocks at the door and Kento’s muffled voice asking you to open the door. With a final forlorn sigh, you manage to push yourself to your feet, find a hoodie to throw on over your fuzzy kitty cat shorts and tank top, and drag yourself over to the door.
Kento is standing just outside your apartment in beige slacks and a big forest green coat. His eyes scan your face, flickering down to the baggy hoodie that adorns your top, before he grimaces. It feels painfully like the equivalent of hearing ‘I’m not mad, just disappointed’, without a word even being spoken.
Straightening, his expression goes neutral as he accepts your silent invitation to enter, immediately rooting around cupboards in your kitchen and pulling out two mugs. He continues his search, pulling out tea and setting your kettle to boil. When he’s satisfied with his work, he turns to lean his hip against the counter. The only hint you get of what’s going through his mind is a barely noticeable twitch of his brow as you’re glued in place to where he left you just inside the door.
“Um- you don’t have to do all that,” you make a meek attempt at stopping him, receiving only a raised brow in return.
“A little late for that, no?”
Your lips part as you evaluate the scene behind him, the kettle already beginning to boil, tea bags sitting in mugs. You chew on your lip, wincing at how raw it is under your teeth.
“So tell me,” he begins, arms crossed over his chest. “What has you sleeping through your alarm?”
The intonation behind his words briefly has you feeling like a child who’s been caught by their parents doing something bad. Sighing, you relent, languidly finding your way to the table shoved into the corner of the small apartment kitchen. Your face falls as you lean over the table, the photo definition of exhaustion.
“Sukuna and I got into a fight last night,” you admit.
Kento’s expression hardens, his jaw tightening as his sharp eyes narrow just enough to tell you he’s beyond mad. As the kettle whistles behind him, his movements are measured as he pours boiling water into each mug with a glance at his watch to allow them the perfect amount of time to steep.
“Milk and sugar?”
“Please,” you murmur, staring at the subtle shadow your fingers cast over the table as you tap them rhythmically across the wooden surface.
Kento moves evenly, his gaze drawn to the full mugs to ensure he doesn’t spill as he sets one in front of you, holding the other close to him as he pulls out a chair beside you for himself.
“I won’t force you to talk about the argument,” he begins in a measured tone, as though he needs a moment before addressing the subject to keep his frustrations at bay. “However, I would like to talk about how you’re feeling.” He swirls the small teaspoon in his mug, his eyes flickering up to meet yours.
The steam billowing from the mug in front of you draws your gaze, swirling and dissipating at your eye level.
“You’re too…” you search for a word, leaning on your hand, “perceptive,” you grumble, not particularly in the mood to talk about how you’re feeling either.
Kento’s lips twitch upwards just enough to let you know he heard you.
“I’m just tired, I think.”
Bringing his mug to his lips, Kento hums. He leaves the dialogue open for you to talk about what you want to, rather than pressing. He’s always been overly considerate in that way, even as kids.
Sliding your finger up the side of the mug and pulling it towards yourself, allowing the steam to soothe your pounding head, you sigh, finally relenting to Kento’s kindness.
“I’m just so frustrated. I put my all into our friendship, into helping him with everything and with the lawsuit, and he just-” you shake your head, waving a hand through the air. “He just turns everything into an argument, and he’s never willing to talk things through.” You drag a hand over your face, pressing your fingers hard into your temple in an attempt to will away your headache.
Despite the obvious tension riddling his muscles, Kento remains calm and steady. “No one can blame you for being frustrated with him,” he agrees, taking another sip of his tea in order to keep his less pleasant opinions on Sukuna to himself. “Not everyone grew up with my mother breathing down their neck, after all,” he chuckles mostly to himself, a memory popping into his mind of his psychiatrist of a mother scolding you for not telling Kento how you felt when he ate the last piece of your birthday cake one year.
Of course, you were both barely seven, and the argument was over cake, completely inconsequential. Yet, you’d still both learned a very valuable lesson. Not necessarily from the single incident, but his mother had a certain way of scolding both of you and Yu, that had the three of you growing up extremely in tune with your own emotions and your capability of discussing them.
“Your mom’s an angel,” you mumble with a small smile.
Humming in agreement, Kento nods. “She is. My perspective, however, is that Sukuna didn’t have the privilege of growing up with someone like her.” For someone so blatantly angry with Sukuna’s treatment of you, he’s shockingly reasonable as you discuss your frustrations. “I may not know much about him, but I would be willing to wager a guess that he finds it difficult to discuss how he’s feeling.”
“I could have told you that.”
Kento cocks a brow at your sassy reply. “My point,” he continues, “is that some people are not worth your time. It may be worth thinking about whether he is.”
There’s his anger.
“It doesn’t matter anymore,” you shrug, blowing on your tea.
“The argument was that serious?”
You drum your fingers over the side of the mug. “I told him he wasted his last chance with me.”
“I see,” he pauses, considering his words carefully. “I’m glad you stood up for yourself,” he speaks in a very genuine tone, “but you don’t seem happy about the outcome.”
You let the silence hang over you both for a moment, finally taking a sip of your tea. You would have put more milk, but it’s still nice.
You mull over Nanami’s words. No, you’re not happy. You’re not happy that you cried through the night, or that you’re upset over Sukuna’s cutting words. But worst of all, you’re not happy that he chose to waste his last chance with you.
He’d been so certain it wouldn’t happen again, yet things are never so simple with him, are they? There’s always a way he can dig himself further underground, to drown in his own sorrows.
So why are you harboring guilt so wholeheartedly alongside the hurt? Why are you allowing him the satisfaction of hurting you and feeling the culpability of your own actions when you tried to fix things on the spot?
Why do you still feel the urge to go back and check on him?
Why are you crying again?
Your eyes are hot with tears as you find yourself using the back of your hand to wipe your cheeks.
Kento offers a reassuring hand on your upper arm, giving it a gentle rub with his thumb. “You can lean on me, if you need.”
“I’m okay,” you manage, sniffling once as you force what may be the least convincing smile your blonde friend has ever seen.
“I’d beg to differ,” he frowns, giving your arm a light squeeze as he sighs. “It’s okay to be down,” he reminds you with a genuine look of sympathy as his anger towards Sukuna dissipating in place of his concern for you.
Your lip quirks up slightly at his words. You’d only just spoken that exact sentiment to Choso not that long ago, now it was being used against you like cruel irony. You suppose it makes sense the phrase would have come from Nanami, or more specifically his mom.
“You’re right, I know,” you relent, leaning forward on your palm with your elbow bent against the table. You can’t deny your own words, you know you should talk to Kento, even if it isn’t easy to do so. Your eyes flicker to the woven bracelets that slide down your wrist that you don’t have the heart to cut off as you contemplate what you want to say.
Your mouth opens and closes a number of times before you compose yourself, sitting upright and facing your friend. His aloof expression remains intact as you open and close your mouth a number of times before finally managing to spit something out.
“Can I tell you something?”
He nods.
“We kissed. Right before finals, last semester,” you begin, chewing on your raw lip with a subtle wince at the hot pain that shoots through it. Nanami nods in acknowledgement, refraining from passing judgement. “Then, at Satoru’s party, the one that you missed when you headed back home, he rejected me… I guess.” Saying it aloud feels somehow surreal, as though considering the kiss (if it could even be called just a kiss) nothing more than a passing craving is a criminal offence.
But at the end of the day, he called it a mistake. He backtracked and picked up the pieces and made it clear that he wants you in his life, but not like that.
Wanted you in his life.
Wanted.
Rubbing your hands harshly over your features in an effort to quell the tears that seem to relentlessly trail down the soft skin of your cheeks, you suck in a sharp breath and continue. “And that’s fine, I was okay with just being his friend,” you whisper, your voice betraying your anguish. “But even though he rejected me and I knew nothing would happen, I still fell in love with him.”
The floodgates absolutely shatter in that moment, a mess of salty tears and barely contained sobs falling from you. The admission carries so much weight, yet voicing it doesn’t lift the burden from your heart. Rather, the air around you seems heavy in comparison to only a moment ago.
Kento frowns, sliding his chair closer to you to allow him to draw you into his side. He’s always been particularly good at comfort, for someone so stoic. “I know,” he sighs, a gentle hand rubbing your shoulder. “I think everyone at our table knows apart from you and him.”
“Don’t tell me that,” you sniffle, “that just makes this all more embarrassing,” you mumble with a sad chuckle.
Kento hums, a tinge of humor surrounding the sound. “There’s nothing to be ashamed of. You can’t help who you fall for.” He pats your shoulder reassuringly, pulling back to sit in his own seat as he shoots you an earnest look. “Why don’t you spend the weekend relaxing? You can return to your studies on Monday,” he suggests, changing the subject as you wipe the remnants of tears from your eyes. “I can drop some dinner off after class, if you’d like the company.”
It sounds nice, it really does.
But thinking about Sukuna has you realizing that you have a test in a few hours that you can’t afford to miss.
Life stops for no one.
Not even the heartbroken girl who’s entirely too sweet for her own good.
“That’s alright,” you shoot him a wry smile, “I need to get to my afternoon class. I have an exam.”
“Less than ideal timing,” Kento scowls. His expression mirrors one you’ve seen on his mother’s face before, back when you were children.
“Stop assessing me,” you scold him. “You aren’t even in Psych.”
Kento chuckles quietly, caught. “Sorry,” he apologizes, checking the time. “In that case, why don’t we head to campus together? We can grab something to eat on the way.”
“Sure, that sounds nice. Will you be okay to wait while I get ready?” You query with a small tilt of your head.
“I’m sure I can find something to do,” he assures you.
Your chair slides across the floor as you get to your feet, beginning your morning routine a few hours later than usual.
By the time you’ve managed to pull yourself together as best as your motivation will allow, you find yourself staring at the mirror, letting out a long sigh. You’ve done your best to cover up the remnants of the many hours of tears that were cried, but foundation and concealer only goes so far, and you can’t bring yourself to do any more makeup. Your limbs are simply too heavy to be bothered. Your outfit isn’t exactly doing you any favors to hide your mental state either, a pair of sweatpants adorning your lower half while a pale pink oversized hoodie hangs loosely over your shoulders.
It’ll have to do.
It’s not until you arrive at the lunch hall that you realize that your appearance might seem a bit out of place to the rest of the table. Still, you assure them as many times as you can that you’re just tired. It’s true, but it’s hard to keep the facade up when even Toji is shooting you the occasional look as though ‘Sukuna broke my heart’ is tattooed across your forehead.
You even debate going to check at one point, but Kento assures you that everything is fine, offering to walk you to your class. He beckons Shoko along with him, who practically has an outburst as soon as you’re out in the chilly air on your way to the lecture hall.
“I’ll kick his ass. I’m gonna make him wish he never even met you. I’ll-”
“Stop! Stop. Please,” you plead with wide eyes. You appreciate her zealousness, but if you have to hear another threat to Sukuna’s balls from her, you think you may just need to rip your ears off. “Is it that obvious?” You pout, though the humor you try to lace into the expression gets lost along the way.
Shoko’s shoulders fall as she pulls you in for a hug. “I’m sorry,” she says softly, both as an apology for coming out the gates swinging and a show of sympathy. “Are you okay?”
“I’ll live,” you reply quietly with a tight-lipped smile, though she can’t see it as she holds you.
“Why don’t you stay at mine this weekend?”
“That’s okay, Sho,” you hum, pulling back with a heavy sigh. “I think I need some time.”
Shoko doesn’t seem convinced, shooting Nanami an uncertain look, but she nods regardless. “If you say so.” Her brow curls in thought as she pulls back from you. “Girls’ night tonight?” She resigns from the idea of the full weekend, still pushing for something, knowing you otherwise would likely waste away alone under the covers of your bed.
“I’m not really-”
“Actually, not up for discussion!” She decides, pointing a finger at you. “Meet me outside the research building, my lecture ends at three.” She then turns to Kento. “We’ll grab you from class once we’re both out.”
His brow raises. “For what?”
“Girls’ night.”
With a deep sigh, he presses his thumb to the crease between his brows. “I was under the impression that getting my nails done was a one-time thing.”
Shoko shoots him an innocent smile. “Nope. You’re in it for life now.”
“I’m thrilled,” he grimaces, though there’s a nearly imperceptible hint of warmth that swirls in his tawny irises. He turns his attention back towards you, motioning with his chin towards the building a few steps away. “Go ace your exam.”
“Thanks, Kento. Both of you,” you turn your attention to Shoko, hugging her again.
“Don’t thank me yet,” she smiles, “because this conversation isn’t over.” It comes across as a warning, but you’re grateful to have such supportive friends to fall back on.
Turning to your class, you’re relieved they can’t see the frown that pulls your lips down immediately as you’re faced with thoughts that Sukuna likely doesn’t have anyone to lean on. Maybe Uraume, but they didn’t seem to know what had happened as far as you could tell at lunch.
You can only hope the fallout of the argument isn’t as dire on him as it has been on you. Unfortunately, that hope fizzles out when you enter the lecture hall and find the seat beside yours empty.
As the professor passes the exam out to the students around the hall, slowly making her way up to your seat, you find dread settling in the pit of your stomach. Sukuna’s failed. He’s not here, and you know he’s not coming. No matter what happened between you and no matter the fact that you know you need to let go, you can’t help but worry.
It’s just who you are.
You swallow hard at the sympathetic look your professor gives you as she hands your test to you.
You want to tell her you tried.
Yet somehow, it all feels fruitless. There’s no point. It doesn’t matter anymore.
You need to focus on your test.
–
Fiddling with the colored twine wrapped around your wrist, you stare out into the crowd in front of you. Your vision blurs at the edges, the bright colors of different clothes all seeming to blend as you stare mindlessly out at the sweaty bodies making rounds of Satoru’s frat house.
The bass of whatever party playlist your friend’s thrown on surrounds you, and yet you can hardly hear it over the ringing in your ears.
How many times had you nodded when Satoru asked if you wanted another drink? Six? Seven? More?
Your attention turns down to the red cup in your hands as you find yourself staring at the vodka and sprite fizzing as you swirl it in the cup.
It may have been a couple of weeks, but between your less-than-ideal exam score in Literature History and the lingering heartbreak, drinking away the pain had seemed like the best course of action for the night. The key word being had. Now, looking out into the crowd with more than a buzz and your mind filled with static, you’re starting to regret that decision.
You thought you would forget. Forget and party, maybe kiss some hot frat boy and pretend everything with Sukuna had all been a bad dream, but that wasn’t the case at all.
Instead, you’d embarrassed yourself in front of Suguru by spilling every single detail about your kiss with Sukuna, leaving the poor man shocked and concerned for you, only to excuse yourself to get another drink. Now, plopped down on the couch with a heart that aches, you contemplate just grabbing a cab and going home. You’re not even sure how late it is, or how long you’ve been here, but sitting alone on the couch in front of the dancefloor feels… well, pathetic.
Throwing your head back on the cushion, you head to the kitchen and dump your drink down the sink. Satoru can afford it, and your mind and heart sure as hell can’t.
You turn your blurry vision back to the crowd, chewing on your lip as you search for Shoko, Satoru, Suguru… Even Toji, Uraume, or Atsuya, who you had spotted earlier.
Anything to distract you from the horribly lonely thoughts.
Of all the things that the heartbreak of leaving Sukuna’s apartment that night had caused, you never imagined that loneliness would tug at you so strongly. You spent every moment of spare time with Sukuna, Yuji and Choso, and now… your spare time feels empty. Movies, music, books, TV, it’s all little more than a distraction.
Still, the time away from the man in question had allowed you an opportunity to pick up pieces of yourself you hadn’t even realized were spilled across the floor like dried paint. Impossible to fully pick up, but mostly wiped away. You’d needed to fill the pieces in with new ones. They didn’t fit quite right, they weren’t… Well, there’s no need to think about him. Even if the pieces aren’t moulded quite correctly and leave behind cracks, you’re healing.
It’s what you told yourself anyway. That your new friendships with Toji, Atsuya and Uraume could fill the gaps eventually if you allowed yourself to nurture them.
But at the end of the day, it all connects back to him. If it were a normal day, you would have been satisfied with those new friendships.
But you’re drunk. And everyone looks like Sukuna if you squint too hard.
“My bad, are you alright?” a familiar voice rings out in the air around you as the fridge door accidentally knocks into your side, pulling you from your thoughts. You stumble forward, catching yourself on the kitchen counter.
“Hiromi,” you blink in surprise at the sight of the law student, his attire a complete one-eighty from the last time you came across him with-
Fuck.
Shaking your head, you shoot him a smile. “Don’t worry ‘bout it.” You swallow hard, crossing your arms over your chest to push down stray thoughts of a certain salmon-haired man.
“How’ve you been?” He queries, leaning back against the stainless steel fridge once it shuts and he’s got a drink in his hand.
“Not too bad,” you lie steadily, your hands suddenly feeling empty without the comfort of a drink.
Maybe you should have kept the cup.
“How’re you?” You bounce the question back at him, surprised when your words come out slurred. Are you really that drunk?
“Good, good. Getting as ready as I can for midterms,” he smiles, his sunken eyes crinkling at the corners as he exchanges niceties with you. You can see how he’s friends with Kento, they share a certain sense of warmth and openness that you’re sure makes it easy for them to get along with anyone.
“Me too,” you nod. “But S’toru loves to drag us out to parties,” you chuckle wryly.
Hiromi nods in acknowledgment. “Sounds right from what I know of the guy. How’s Sukuna? Everything going alright with the, uh, lawsuit?”
Based on the way Hiromi blinks in confusion, you must blanche. Or maybe it’s the way you go silent. Or the way your face falls.
What does it matter?
Regardless, Hiromi stands up straight, running a hand through his disheveled hair. A stray strand falls over his forehead as he takes a step towards you. “Shit, I didn’t mean to, uh-” he pauses, glancing around uncertainly. “I didn’t know it was a touchy subject, I’m sorry.”
You swallow down your emotions, forcing a brave face and a tight-lipped smile. At least you aren’t crying. “It’s fine, you didn’ know.”
His lips part, but he doesn’t seem too sure of what to say.
“It was good t’ see you,” you offer him an out, but to your shock he doesn’t take it. He would be like Nanami in that way.
“I’m, uh, heading to sit with Kento if you wanted to join me,” he dismisses your offer, tilting his chin in the direction of the front door. “He’s by the stairs.”
“He’s here?”
Hiromi’s shoulders relax as he nods.
“That’d be great.”
Squeezing through the crowd of sweaty bodies that reek of alcohol and weed- though you probably do too- you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding as the stairs come into sight. Sure enough, your blonde friend’s familiar face turns to you and Hiromi. He’s still in his usual button-down with pale beige slacks, but the sleeves are rolled up past his elbows and he seems at ease.
At the sight of an approaching person, Kento’s attention shifts, flickering between Hiromi and you.
“Look who I found,” Hiromi smiles, plopping down on the stairs.
Your name slips past Kento’s lips as a greeting.
“Hey, Kento,” you put your best effort into the smile, taking a seat beside him on the stairs. He’s sitting next to a woman you don’t recognize, though based on how Hiromi immediately launches into conversation with her, you assume they’re friends. “‘M surprised you’re here.”
The blonde motions to his formal outfit, too dressed up for a party. “As am I,” he concurs. “Yu dragged me here, then disappeared.”
Although this isn’t his scene, Kento usually shows up to Satoru’s parties regardless, and keeps mostly to himself and your group. He’s made it clear he isn’t a fan, and he’s not particularly close to Satoru as far as your group goes, finding his boisterous personality mildly irritating, however he’s happy to look out for his friends while they’re drinking.
“At least y’ found Hiromi,” you point out, to which Kento nods.
“I still would prefer to be studying,” he sighs, bringing a hand up to scratch his chin. His eyes are still sharp, hardly dulled by the meager amount of alcohol in his system. Beer and coolers aren’t exactly his forté, and he’s not about to bring whiskey to a frat party. In fact, you wouldn’t be shocked if all he’d had to this point was a sip.
“May as well enjoy it now th’t you’re here,” you offer a smile, shrugging. “Satoru n’ Suguru were playing beer pong last time I saw ‘em, and Shoko n’ Uraume are in the back corner talking to some o’ their classmates.”
Kento hums, staring blankly at the beige wall ahead of the stairs. “And you?”
“What ‘bout me?”
“Why aren’t you with either of them?” He asks, turning to face you.
You blink a couple of times, before absently shrugging. “Jus’ needed some space, I guess.”
Kento examines your expression for a moment too long, and even in your haze of drunkenness, it sends a shiver down your spine. He grimaces finally, his brows pulled together in concern.
“How are you feeling?”
“Fine.”
He scowls harder.
“Drunk, and fine.”
Recognition of your half-lie flashes through his eyes.
Too drunk to remember you have makeup on, you rub at your eyes with your thumb and pointer finger, sighing. “I’m jus’ more drunk than I thought. But fine, really.”
Kento sighs, abandoning his drink with Hiromi as he pushes to his feet. “Come on,” he urges you, pulling you to your feet alongside him. The amount you rely on him to pull you up surprises even you as he keeps you steady while he searches for Shoko. He threads through the dancefloor, leading your unsteady gait past the beer pong tables as Suguru sinks a ball in your journalism classmate’s cup, met with the cheers of the surrounding crowd. In your haze, you barely notice the kitchen and living room all coming into sight, until Kento brings you to a halt behind the beer pong tables at the back of the living room.
With lidded eyes, you survey your surroundings. Discarded bottles of beer and coolers lay across the floor and the back of the couch, which Toji is lounging in. He yawns, taking another sip of his beer as his emerald eyes flicker up to you. His lips twitch up into a smirk as he catches your eye.
“You a lil’ tipsy?” He queries.
You only manage a nod before Kento is gently setting you down between Toji and Uraume. You can scarcely hear the blonde over the pumping bass of the pop music blaring through the speakers, but at the sound of your name, you tune in.
“I’m taking her out- would you like to join?”
Shoko shakes her head, her attention trained on a brunette with a scar over the side of her face.
“Shit, are you goin’ for food?”
Kento’s brow raises as he turns to Toji and nods. “That was my plan.”
“Fuck, count me in. Satoru’s got this place stocked like he’s never made a fuckin’ dime.”
“Ouch?” The man in question feigns a shot to the heart dramatically as he steps through the crowd, shooting Toji a look.
“Don’t act like a fuckin’ Snickers bar wasn’t your dinner,” Toji scoffs, the scar at the corner of his lip pulled taut.
“It was a good dinner,” he shrugs.
“This is why ya can’t handle your alcohol.”
Before you know it, the four of you are all piling into Kento’s tiny silver Honda Civic, possibly the strangest group of four all piled into a car. A business major, football player, frat boy, and literature major, two of whom you’re certain annoy Kento, but parties may just bother him more.
“Shouldn’t you be looking after your own party, Gojo?” Kento shoots him a glare through the rearview mirror as the white-haired man lets out a loud belch.
“Nah, the frat’s got it covered,” he dismisses his friend before grimacing in your direction. “And my bedroom door is locked, so there’s nothing to worry about.”
The meaning behind his words passes completely over your head as you stare out the window, ignoring the two men in the back.
“Where’re you takin’ us, anyway?” Toji asks, leaning so far into his chair that his knees continually hit the back of your seat.
“Denny’s.”
“Fuck yeah.”
Satoru and Toji make steady conversation in the back of the car until you pull into the parking lot of the nearest Denny’s. Kento makes his way around the car to help you, sighing as you brush him off and trail very slowly after him, staring up at the dimly-lit diner sign as though you’ve never seen it before.
Your group follows the waitress to a table, where you stare at the menu, but it’s all a blur. Your eyes are trained on a photo of a waffle covered in chocolate syrup and it’s at this point that you realize that it’s not just the menu, but most of the night that’s a blur.
In fact, you know you just got here, and you hardly remember a thing.
Shouldn’t you be happy? You’re a happy drunk.
Instead, it feels as though you’re wading through your own misery, hardly keeping afloat.
“Do you know what you want?” Kento nudges you as the waitress makes her way over to you.
You shake your head no, wobbling slightly.
His brow furrows as he examines you. “Are you alright?”
“I’m fine,” you dismiss him again, but now even Toji and Satoru are staring your way.
“Lemme guess,” Toji starts, leaning forward over the table on his forearms. “Sukuna.”
You’d managed to keep the fight with Sukuna under wraps for the last couple of weeks, only by studying during lunch and excusing yourself before anyone could ask about him, but now it seemed there was no escaping it.
“Not the time, Toji,” Kento warns with a sharp glare, before asking the waitress for water for the table and a few more minutes to look at the menu.
“It’s fine,” you shrug. “Yeah, it’s Sukuna,” you tell the raven-haired football player.
“Shit, ‘course it is,” Toji snorts, though he’s not shocked. “I’ll kick his ass for you.”
“You really don’t-”
“I knew he’d pull some shit,” Satoru interrupts, waving a hand dramatically through the air. “Toji and I’ll-”
“No no nonono-” you wave your hands in front of the table to get their attention. “Just- leave ‘im be. We both made mistakes. I’ll be fine.”
“You’ve been saying that word a lot lately. Fine. Yet you don’t seem it,” Kento points out, and you’re surprised even he’s jumping on the train to kick Sukuna’s ass, in his own subtle way.
“Yeah, well-” you pause, watching as the waitress sets water before each of you. With a haphazard swirl of the glass in front of you, you shrug. “I thought the alcohol would help.”
“Alcohol is a depressant,” Kento points out in typical fashion, earning deadpan glares from not only you, but Toji, and Satoru as well.
“Lighten up, Nanamin, let the girl drink.” Satoru gives your glass a tap from across the table with a drunken grin, taking a sip as though it isn’t water. Kento grimaces at your side, but remains quiet. “You don’t need that asshole,” Satoru continues, swinging his hand through the air again as though he might just hit Sukuna. “You’ve got us, and we’re gonna haaaaaave-” He pauses, his finger skimming across the laminated menu in his hand. “Cinnamon roll pancakes à la carte.”
“Maybe you are,” Toji snorts, shaking his head. He opens his mouth to voice his order, but Satoru’s already pulling the menus from all of your hands as the waitress approaches again.
“Nah, listen. The secret to getting over some asshole issss-” He waits for the waitress to return, shooting her a kind smile. “Four cookies n’ cream milkshakes, and four stacks of cinnamon bun pancakes. À la carte. Please,” he grins, using that sultry sweet smile he’s perfected that has you giggling at the disdain on both Kento and Toji’s faces.
To your surprise, it turns out the cure to heartbreak is a stack of cinnamon bun pancakes tall enough to make you puke. Or maybe that feeling is from the alcohol you had entirely too much of. Either way, you find yourself forgetting about him and focusing on now. The people who show up when you’re down, even if Satoru and Toji are only here at the mention of food.
But as you find yourself laughing and really, truly, enjoying yourself, your heart feels warm and the cracks left behind by Sukuna begin to heal. They’ll leave behind jagged scars in the form of him and his little brothers, a point in your life that you’re still fond of, and you think you always will be. You don’t regret what you did for any of them, the proof of that still tied around your wrist, but you do wish you could at least have apologized properly for hurting him.
The worst part of all may be that you’re not sure if those scars will ever fade. The love you felt- feel- for him, is beyond what you’ve ever felt before. The way he showed his care may have been unconventional, but it worked for you. Maybe it was the knowledge that no one got to understand Sukuna quite like you, that he let himself be vulnerable around you and taught you about yourself, your kindness, and your mind like no one else could. It brought out a part of you that you’re proud to continue to nurture, even if that means the scars remain.
Still, even if only for a night, the hurt fades as you laugh along with what might be the strangest group of four you could make up out of your friends.
Maybe locking yourself up and watching sad movies had been a bigger mistake than you thought.
–
With wide, bright eyes, you make your way into the office on the first Tuesday of March. The office may as well be on fire given the state you find it in, paperwork scattered across every desk in sight and half of the staff seem to be running around like chickens with their heads cut off.
“What…?”
Before you have time to question the chaos of the office, the editor who you’d been shadowing stops at the sight of you. Her blonde hair nearly reaches her waist, her tall stance hunched and tired as though she’s been spread thin all day.
“Yuki, what’s going on?” You query, your brow pulled together.
“Ayana disappeared,” she explains with a sigh. You tilt your head, certain the company’s graphic designer is just sick, or- “And no one’s been able to get a hold of her for over a week now. We’ve got seven novels without covers all from one company, and if we can’t provide soon, we’ll lose our biggest client-”
“Why don’t we just outsource?” You shake your head, interrupting her rambling.
“Girl, I wish. I’ve suggested it like- seven times. I guess we ‘can’t’.” Her use of finger quotations around the word ‘can’t’ has you pursing your lips in confusion.
“And why ‘can’t’ we, exactly?” You mirror her actions.
She groans dramatically, throwing her head back. “It’s a company policy or some shit, I don’t know.”
“I mean, we have a design course at the university, I’m sure I could-”
“Oh my god, please. We need someone hired like yesterday, and the boss is seriously dragging her feet. If you could get someone here who can start right away, you’d be a life-saver.” She grabs you by the shoulders, giving you a small shake to get her point across.
“Yeah, I can try to pull some strings tomorrow,” you grin.
As it would turn out, two of the seven novels were ones you shadowed Yuki on, and one was the first novel you worked on by yourself. Which is to say, you would have nothing to show for your entire internship if things fell through with this client.
So basically, you had until Thursday to get someone in, because the client was getting impatient of the excuses being thrown their way.
You’d asked your friends at lunch if they knew anyone and even skipped class on Wednesday afternoon in an effort to talk to as many of the professors that even slightly suited the industry as you could, building up a small page of potential student and graduate contacts.
Three didn’t reply. Four were too busy to take on seven covers in the span of a couple of days. Nine couldn’t start for two weeks and even then, they would need to weigh their options.
There’s one other person who occurs to you, but that can’t be your last option, right?
Sitting and staring at your laptop, you dial Shoko’s number.
“Don’t kill me,” you start when she picks up, tapping your fingers on your desk as you put your phone on speaker.
“Should I want to?” She asks, and you can practically hear her raised brow.
“So, you know how our graphic designer left?”
“Yeah, the girl who cooks bacon in the break room,” her voice comes across the line filled with static, but you’re still able to make out her words.
“Yeah, that’s the one. So, I guess she disappeared last week and we’re behind on seven covers.”
“Right, so outsource.”
Ugh. “That’s what I said! I guess it’s against policy, we have a strict rule of everything being done locally.”
“Okayyyy… So outsource locally.”
You groan, leaning over your desk. The seconds tick by in silence before you finally raise your head again. “Did you happen to meet any artists in the last five hours?”
“Can’t say I did,” she laughs. “Sorry.”
The line goes silent as you contemplate telling her your thoughts, but she beats you to it.
“So, why am I killing you anyway?”
“I know an artist,” you tell her.
“Well shit, why didn’t you just start with them?”
You tap your fingers across your desk rhythmically. So loudly in fact, that you’re almost certain that she can hear the motion.
Her tone drops to a more serious one and you can see the warnings written across her face, even over the phone.
“No. Fuck, no. You just got over him.”
“Do I have a choice, Sho?” You lean on your elbow, continuing to tap mindlessly on the desk.
“What do you-? Yes, he doesn’t deserve the chance.”
“Maybe not, but what else am I supposed to do?”
“Shit, I don’t know, find someone on Fiverr?” She suggests.
You groan into the sleeve of your hoodie. “I tried.”
“You’re cooked if you already tried that,” she sighs. “Can’t you just let these covers fall through? What’s the big deal?”
You explain the situation, to which Shoko only manages a meager ‘oh’, and is forced to listen to you groaning over her phone’s speaker again.
“So, would you kill me?”
“No, but Kento will.”
“I knowww,” you grumble, but what choice are you left with? Unless someone else pulled through, you’re out of options. Silence hangs between you, although you know Shoko’s still there when you hear shuffling. “I don’t believe in fate, but if I did,” you hold up your pinky as though your best friend can see it. “Sukuna and I are tied together.”
“I don’t like that analogy,” she chuckles dryly. “It’s more like he’s a fly you can’t get to go away.”
“That’s just mean,” you grumble.
She chuckles dryly. “Don’t defend him.”
“It wasn’t just his fault this time,” you remind her.
“Maybe. But he had enough chances. This is just for work, yeah?” Though she’s inquiring, there’s an air of assurance to her words, as though she’s trying to get you to agree. Because that’s exactly what she’s doing.
“Just for work.”
Well, fuck.
Now you need to contact Sukuna.
–
There’s no emotion on Sukuna’s face as he watches his youngest brother take the most neon purple washable (hopefully) marker and color in between the tattoos he’s drawn on in black ink. He can’t blame the kid for getting bored, it’s too cold to play basketball and Sukuna’s hardly had time to draw something for him to color.
At least, that’s what he tells himself. It’s easier to admit than to say he’s spent too much time wallowing in self-pity to draw for his little brothers. He could only work a handful of times throughout the week, nearly full-time at the auto shop during school hours for his brothers, then evenings would be spent going over homework and projects, cooking, cleaning, entertaining the kids, getting them ready for bed… it’s an exhausting list, the more he thinks about it.
To think, you did it all without ever expecting anything in return. Just friendship. Those last words you spoke to him and the look on your teary-eyed face burned into the recesses of his brain.
It’s been so long since he’s seen you, and yet his days are so full that it feels like just yesterday.
Or maybe that’s just because the days seem to blend together for him. He can’t even recall the last time he was able to do something for himself. Art had taken a backburner, his diet bent to the will of two picky young kids, and his showers were scarcely as long as a commercial to cut back on water.
He supposes he’s been keeping up with his workout routine, but at this point he’s pretty sure if he stops, he’ll end up laid out on the bathroom floor again. His nightly workouts are the only thing keeping his sleep schedule in any semblance of working order, quite literally burning every last ounce of energy until he passes out.
You and Toji have gone radio-silent. Which makes sense, he didn’t expect anything less. Atsuya was never overly chatty with Sukuna one way or another and Uraume checks in and offers to watch his brothers, but like the grumpy brute that he is, he can’t bring himself to accept. He’s not sure whether that’s out of guilt or fear. Guilt towards how he treated you, and a fear that he may do the same to Uraume.
“Kunaaaaaa! You never listen!”
He blinks at the grating sound of Yuji practically in his ear, swatting at the boy with a grimace.
“Fuckin’ stop, I heard you,” he snarls, holding a hand over his ear at the close proximity of Yuji’s shrill cry.
“If you heard me, then what’d I say?”
Oh. So Sukuna didn’t hear him.
He lets out a long sigh. “Sorry, brat. What’d you say?”
“I said I’m not sleeping tonight.”
Sukuna’s brow raises. “What?”
“Becauuuuse the new Mario game comes out tonight!! At midnight!” Yuji happily proclaims.
Sukuna shoots a glance at Choso, who’s busy at the kitchen table typing away on Sukuna’s laptop for one of his classes. “So?” He asks as he turns his attention back to the endless supply of energy that is his brother. It’s not like they have any current gaming systems.
“So I need to stay up so I can watch it on YouTube!”
“Absolutely not,” Sukuna shuts down the idea, much to Yuji’s dismay as he whines, tugging on the burly man’s hoodie sleeve.
“PLEAAAAAAAASE!” Yuji pleads, tugging against Sukuna with as much of his body weight as the five-year-old can put into it. “Pleasepleasepleaseplease-”
“Enough!” Sukuna barks, shutting down Yuji’s pleas. “As soon as your brother finishes his homework, you’re both goin’ to bed.”
Yuji shoots Choso a pointed look, but the middle brother’s hardly paying attention, the act of working on his homework little more than mechanical. Sukuna knows that, because he thinks he fucked up.
Again.
His first meeting with the top lawyer Hiromi had recommended had taken place at the apartment the other day, at Sukuna’s request, for ease of looking after his brothers. Luckily she was sympathetic to his situation and agreed, discussing what would take place at the proceedings and what she needed from Sukuna aside from the documents he’d already provided. Sukuna had left out the portion where he’d gotten advice from a student, of course.
With the discussion, however, came the realization that Choso was hardly a room away during the discussion of the possibility of social workers conducting a house study. It wouldn’t be Sukuna’s first time having social workers in the house, but that’s exactly why he fears the way Choso’s personality has dulled again.
He’d gotten better. Sukuna isn’t sure exactly what you did, but life had flowed back into his brother’s world. It was gradual, just little moments of genuine happiness at first, before he caught Choso smiling at a bird on the walk home from school. Asking for help on assignments. Defending Yuji when Sukuna got a little too frustrated with the five-year-old.
And it all came crumbling down at once. He knew it had to do with the meeting with the lawyer, but it didn’t make it any easier. Yuji had noticed it too. Even now, as he stares at Choso, hoping the older Itadori will defend him, Choso hasn’t bothered to look up from his work. Whether he’s completely oblivious to his brothers watching him or simply can’t be bothered to care, Sukuna isn’t certain.
Most of the legal consultation would have flown over any kid’s head, even Choso’s, but social workers? That was a term Choso knew all too well. And if he had to pinpoint something that might have shut the dark-haired kid down, he figured that had to be it.
It didn’t matter how many years passed, Sukuna will never forget the way he failed Choso the day of their house study following the passing of their father. He relives it in his nightmares from time to time, serving as a constant reminder of his fuck-ups.
Sunlight filters through the frosted window behind the shower as Sukuna pushes his hair back from his forehead, slick with sweat. He holds himself up over the sink, washing his mouth out as best as he can and brushing his teeth.
The dark circles under his eyes may as well be shadows given how much weight he’d lost. He can’t keep food down long enough to gain any of his muscle mass back, he’d become little more than a shadow of his former self.
Balling his hand into a fist, he grits his teeth and pushes to his full height, staring at someone he doesn’t recognize. The man, barely more than a child himself, looking back at him wasn’t suited to look after kids. Yet he’d been forced to put in a petition to take guardianship when his father’s will had listed no one to look after the kids and their mother was absent.
Sukuna wipes his mouth on the back of his hand, swallowing hard and sucking in a deep breath. Yuji will wake up any second now. Choso will want breakfast. Sukuna will be forced to bend over backwards to satiate their needs, to take care of the two people who look the most like his late father and absent step-mother.
It’s a haunting feeling, to see those that are gone in people you care about.
It’s a feeling that Sukuna can’t escape, that grips him by the throat as he struggles to differentiate the people he loves from the people he’s lost.
Does that make him a sorry excuse for a guardian? Maybe. Does it make him a sorry excuse for a brother? Definitely.
He coughs into his elbow, wiping perspiration from his neck and washing his hands once more. It seems no matter how many times he washes them, he can’t escape the feeling that he’s a shitty brother. A shitty brother who can hardly bear to look at his brothers, as though everything that’s happened is their fault.
He resents himself for it, every minute of every day.
He’d give anything to bring their father back. He’d know what to do. He always did.
Sukuna lets out a breath as he pushes through the washroom door after throwing a plain black V-neck on over his head and a pair of beige joggers. He makes his way to the kitchen, pulling open the fridge door and staring blankly at the ingredients sitting within. Leftovers from- what? A week ago? Yogurt, eggs, a half-empty can of tuna that’s been there long enough that his nose is wrinkling just from opening the fridge and-
A bang from the other side of the house- a house filled with memories turned dreary, too big for the three current inhabitants- catches Sukuna’s attention. He shuts the fridge door with more force than intended, scowling as he languidly trudges across his father’s house. Pushing open the door, the Sukuna finds Choso in the kid’s bedroom, with the vacuum in pieces across the floor, the main compartment imploded in a cloud of dust that now litters the carpet.
It takes every ounce of self-control that Sukuna has left to keep his voice (mostly) even as he mutters “what’re you doing?”
Choso guiltily shuffles in place, avoiding Sukuna’s sharp crimson stare. “Trying to help,” he whispers, fiddling with his fingers.
Sukuna lets out a huff. “Well, don’t,” he grumbles, getting ready to turn away.
“But- the social workers-”
The- oh. Oh, fuck.
Clearing his throat, Sukuna turns back towards his little brother, a pained expression on his exhausted face. “Is that today?”
Choso nods.
Fuck. FUCK.
There’s no food in the house. The kitchen is a downright mess, Yuji could wake up in a mess of sobs that Sukuna hardly knows how to handle at any moment, the living room is piled high with laundry that Sukuna had the energy to wash but not fold, and now… Sukuna rubs his hands harshly down his face, peeking through his fingers only to stare at the dust.
What time are they coming? Did he even write it down? He can’t remember.
“When, uh-”
“Ten.”
Sukuna pulls his phone from his pocket. Nine.
Fuck.
“I cleaned Yuji and I’s rooms and shut dad’s-” Choso begins, getting down on his knees to start brushing up the dust from the collapsed vacuum as best as he can with his hands.
“Stop- stop,” Sukuna instructs, pulling his brother away from the pile of dust. “Go wash up.” He instructs, watching the little boy guiltily nod. How old is he? Nine? Sukuna doesn’t remember, but as the little boy jogs out of his room to wash his hands leaving Sukuna alone, another wave of nausea washes over him.
He could wretch at the mere mention of their father. He coughs, his throat raw and dry as he stares at the pile of dust.
His nine year old brother cleaned the damn house because Sukuna couldn’t. Sukuna couldn’t get his shit together enough to get the house in order for the social worker.
The pace that his chest rises and falls grows irregular as he stares at the dust, wasting time as the minutes pass by. He needs to do the laundry, the dishes-
He looks down at himself, at the V-neck that he’s pretty sure Yuji spit on. He doesn’t remember anymore. Did he wash this shirt? Was that another one that Yuji spit on? What’s the stain on his shoulder?
Stumbling out of Choso’s room, Sukuna heads to the kitchen in a manic blur, staring at all the dishes piling up in the sink and across the counter and table.
Maybe the laundry will be less daunting.
He makes his way to the living room, only to find that Choso has taken care of that too, everything is folded about as well as a nine-year-old can manage, an uneven stack of shirts sitting alongside Sukuna’s pants, though it looks like Choso and Yuji’s clothes have already been put away.
His chest tightens, like an anvil pressing its full weight on his ribs. He can’t breathe.
The door clicks as his brother leaves the washroom and Sukuna waits with shaking hands for his brother to leave. He can’t see Sukuna like this. Sukuna’s supposed to take care of him, why is it Choso that’s taking care of him? The kid’s hardly spoken a word to him since Jin’s passing, and yet he’s keeping track of the house study and making cereal for himself just so that Sukuna doesn’t have to.
A nine-year-old shouldn’t have to step up. Especially not one who's just lost both parents. Hell, he may as well have lost his brother too, because Sukuna’s not sure he’s still the same man. One could hardly call Sukuna’s routine as of late ‘living’. Sukuna’s heard the kid crying long into the night, sobs muffled by his pillow and two walls, but he doesn’t know what to do anymore.
They cried together so long in the hospital that the shock of Choso’s mom not replying hit Sukuna in a way he wasn’t prepared for.
Sukuna’s hand trembles as he tries to shut the washroom door without alerting Choso. He collapses in front of the toilet, keeling over the bowl weakly. His hair sticks to his forehead again as he leans over, but there’s nothing left in his stomach to throw up.
He heaves and coughs, groaning as his throat stings with the effort. Leaning back, he stares at the ceiling. What had he become? How had things gotten to this point?
Sukuna had goals, he had hopes and dreams, and now they’d been crushed in favor of keeping two kids alive.
Could he even hope to make them happy when he was struggling just to keep them fed?
Hell, he’s struggling to keep himself fed lately.
He was nearly out of money already after the cost of lawyers and the funeral, he needed to get a job. But how was he meant to do that if he couldn’t even put laundry away?
He pulls his phone out, his thumb swiping through apps as if on auto-pilot, clicking on contacts, swiping through letters until he reaches ‘J’. His thumb clicks on instinct and he holds it up to his ear. It rings once, twice, three times. On the fifth, he reaches an answering machine.
“Hey, it’s Jin! Thanks for giving me a call, I’m not around right now but please leave a message!” Followed shortly by a mechanical “this user’s mailbox is full”. The call cuts out and the salmon-haired man pauses for a moment before he leans forward on his knees.
How is he meant to do this? Was this really what his dad wanted for him? No, he can’t think like that. Sukuna grits his teeth, his cheeks hot with tears. He’d left so many messages that will forever go unanswered. With one hand gripping his phone with white knuckles and another buried in his sweat-laden hair, he sits there for longer than he can afford, waiting for his body to relax enough to catch his breath. That time never comes, his chest remaining tight, but he can’t afford to sit here any longer.
Nine thirty.
He pushes himself up off the floor, flipping his head back to keep his hair from his face, and pushes out of the washroom once more this morning. The door slams on its hinges as he rushes into the kitchen, shaky hands moving clean dishes from the dishwasher and into cabinets. Every movement is on instinct, nothing done deliberately as he struggles to keep himself in the right mind for a house study.
How the fuck is he supposed to pass?
“Kuna? I- I found a broom, I’m gonna-”
Choso jumps as Sukuna’s thrown off by his brother’s voice, a plate colliding with the counter and shattering across the ground.
“Fuck!” Sukuna barks, staring down at his hands. A shard of ceramic is embedded into the heel of his left palm, blood seeping out around it. He stares down at the mess at his feet, gripping the counter with his right hand to steady himself.
“Kuna? Are you okay?” Choso asks weakly, his voice hoarse from a lack of use.
“Yeah, uh-” Sukuna can’t bear to look at his brother, his gaze glued to the blood that pools in his palm. “The broom. Can you bring it here? Just- just stay away from the glass.”
The sound of light footsteps gradually fades and Sukuna carefully maneuvers around the mess to the sink, shakily dislodging the ceramic from his skin. Flipping the sink on, he watches the crimson pour into the sink as he runs his hand under warm water, reaching blindly to the drawer that should have bandages. He pulls them out, fumbling with the packaging and settling the bandage over his palm.
Carefully moving away from the glass, he slips on shoes and waits for his brother to drag the broom over. Choso watches as he sweeps up the remaining pieces of the plate, before the boy busies himself with moving the piles of clothing on the couch into Sukuna’s room now that he knows his brother is awake. Spotting movement out of the corner of his eye, Sukuna’s head whips around to Choso.
“Stop. I can handle it.”
Choso pauses, examining Sukuna silently. “I can help-”
“No!” Sukuna growls, dumping the dust pan of shards into the trash before flipping to face Choso. “I can handle it. It’s- It’s not your job.”
Choso’s lips purse as he evaluates Sukuna’s words. He doesn’t believe his older brother.
Is that really the world Sukuna lives in? That his younger brother feels the need to take care of him?
Is he that much of a mess?
Sukuna wipes perspiration from his forehead with the back of his arm, turning back to the dishes and moving quickly to feign being alright.
He just has to make it through the day.
Yuji’s cries blare very suddenly through the house, piercing Sukuna’s ears and he grits his teeth.
He just has to make it through the day.
Setting down a clean plate, he’s in Yuji’s nursery before he can even process what’s happening. He stares blankly for a moment at the crying baby, sharply inhaling. The spitting image of his father. Reaching out, he pulls the child carefully into his arms.
“Stop crying, Yu,” Sukuna mutters softly, staring blankly at the crib and patting the child’s back. It’s his best attempt at comfort in his current state. “Please stop crying,” he begs, feeling his eyes burn himself.
He probably needs food, right? Sukuna can manage that, he thinks. There’s still eggs. He knows Yuji likes scrambled eggs.
The child continues to cry even as Sukuna bounces a little more dramatically as he walks to try to soothe the child. He swallows down any semblance of uncertainty as he makes his way back to the kitchen.
Even as Yuji cries, Sukuna’s gait stutters at the entry to the kitchen, where Choso has snuck back in to continue cleaning the dishes. The oldest brother’s jaw trembles as he inhales slowly, his mind blank. Has Choso been taking care of chores this often? Has he not even noticed?
His eyes are hot and he averts his gaze. He doesn’t have time to fight with Choso.
Setting the baby in his high-chair, Sukuna moves quickly to open the fridge and pull out the eggs.
Egg.
There’s one egg.
He shoots a glance at Choso, who’s shutting the dishwasher beside him.
Choso can have something else, right?
Yeah, cereal. Right.
He pulls out milk alongside the egg, his jaw going slack as he reads the date. It expired today. Surely it’s still alright, right?
Unscrewing the cap, he holds the carton up to his nose and it wrinkles, his lip curling in disgust.
Okay. That’s fine.
He dumps out the rest in the sink.
Yogurt. He can have… yogurt.
What a sorry excuse for a meal. What a sorry excuse for a guardian.
Sukuna stands silently for a moment, contemplating his decisions. Maybe the kids would be better off without him. Maybe they would be better off in the foster system with a pair of adults who can take care of them. Someone equipped for this.
But what if they got separated? What if-
“I can have, um, chicken fingers,” Choso mumbles as he comes up behind Sukuna.
Sukuna swipes his tongue over his lips, opening the freezer. It’s more full than the fridge. That’s an alright option. He pulls them out, beginning to prepare food for both kids as Yuji continues bawling in his chair.
“Give your brother some yogurt while I cook,” Sukuna mumbles, passing the container off to Choso, who nods.
To Sukuna’s relief, the child sniffles and stops crying as Choso quietly spoons yogurt straight from the container. Facing the frying pan with the egg in it, Sukuna shuts his eyes in relief at the silence, a semblance of control returning, even if only for a second.
He casts a glance at the stove. Nine fifty seven. Three minutes.
Finishing up cooking and slipping the chicken into the oven, he sets a small plate on the table, sitting alongside Yuji and blowing on the scrambled eggs to ensure they aren’t too hot. He spoons it into the bumbling child’s mouth, only to sigh when there’s a knock at the door.
Sukuna is so grossly underprepared for this house study. He knows it’s standard procedure in cases like this, just court-ordered motions, but in truth, Sukuna doesn’t think he deserves to be a guardian to either of the kids.
The question of whether he wants this has been rattling around in his head so frequently that he feels a constant guilt. Because he doesn’t. He loves his brothers, of course he does, there’s no question in that. But he doesn’t want this. He’s never wanted this.
Standing in front of the door, he sucks in a breath and puts on his best attempt at a mild expression, leaving a hand over his shoulder to cover the stain that he’s fairly sure is spit from Yuji. Or worse. He doesn’t want to think about it.
A man with short salt-and-pepper graying hair stands outside the door in a nice, long black coat. He wears a pair of deep blue slacks and a white button-up beneath. His pale blue eyes slide along the length of Sukuna’s jaw, silently evaluating his face tattoos.
Is that strike one before he’s even said hello?
Still, the man extends his hand with a carefully mediated smile. He introduces himself as the social worker for Sukuna’s case, goes over the purpose of the visit, and requests access to the home for his evaluation. Sukuna swallows hard and moves aside, letting the man in.
He’s quick to run his evaluating gaze around the front entryway. It’s a bit of a mess, but surely that’s not a big deal.
Surely.
Sukuna clears his throat, mumbling out a “come on in,” as he makes his way into the house. It’s clean enough, there’s no hazards that could put the kids in danger, and Yuji is eating as Choso scoops eggs into his mouth. The social worker evaluates the scene and nods, clearly satisfied that there’s food on the table.
“Mind if I take a look around?”
Sukuna nods in acceptance before trailing a short distance behind the man. He does a walkthrough of the kitchen first, his watchful gaze darting over the counter, to the sink that Sukuna notes he should have cleaned up the scraps sitting in it, and eventually grabs the fridge door handle.
Sukuna winces as he pulls it open and frowns.
“We’re going shopping, uh, today,” Sukuna offers, clearing his throat. “The kids are picky,” he gruffs, scratching at the back of his neck.
That’s definitely a strike, regardless.
Shutting the door, he proceeds to look through the pantry before evaluating the living room, which has gone relatively untouched since Jin got sick, leaving it under a layer of dust, but otherwise clean. The social worker doesn’t appear to think much of it, moving on as he points towards the other side of the house.
“Can you show me to the kids’ rooms?”
Sukuna nods, blazing past his dad’s old room as fast as he can without coming across as suspicious, though he simply can’t bear to look at it. The pink-haired man shuffles on his feet as he waves his hand at the nursery and Choso’s room. He takes a couple of minutes in the nursery, which is likely the cleanest room in the house, re-emerging to take a look at Choso’s room.
“How old is the older of the two?”
Sukuna swallows. Is this a test? “Nine.” He’s nine, right?
The man hums, looking around at the Pokemon plushies and the giant Avocado Squishmallow on the bed. His eyes land on the remnants of the dust pile from the exploded vacuum, and Sukuna stumbles over his words to explain the stain.
“My vacuum broke, just before you got here,” Sukuna explains, clearing his throat. “Uh, it’s on the grocery list.”
The man hums. Is that another strike? How many is Sukuna allowed?
Should he even be hoping he passes this? Is this what’s best for his brothers?
Sukuna lets out a shaky breath, idly scratching at his chest as though the weight crushing his lungs might go away if he does.
The social worker continues on his way, peeking at a closet with cleaning supplies, evaluating the fairly empty backyard, and casting a glance into the washroom. Once he’s done evaluating those, he makes his way back to the open-concept living and dining room.
“Do you mind if I ask a few questions?”
Sukuna nods, taking a seat on the couch in tandem with the worker. Sukuna sits as straight as he can manage, his bouncing leg going unnoticed by the tattooed man. The social worker casts his leg a glance, but says nothing as he pulls out a notepad.
“What’s your relationship to the children?”
“Brother. Uh- step-brother.”
He jots down Sukuna’s reply. “What’s your financial situation like?”
“I need to get a job, but we’re living off the estate of my father.”
The social worker nods, prattling off more questions about the needs of the kids, medical care, questions about Sukuna himself and his background, as well as his experience with kids. Sukuna’s fairly certain he barely skirts by with his responses, but his mind goes blank with the next question.
“How will you handle the emotional needs of your brothers?”
Sukuna stays silent for a moment too long, before choking out “... emotional needs?”
The social worker sits forward. “You’ll be with them throughout all, if not most, of their developmental stages. You need to ensure they’re cared for emotionally and feel secure. Emotional stability is extremely important for young children,” he explains.
Sukuna swallows hard.
Is this already a strike? What the fuck is he supposed to say? He’s too depressed, too manic himself, to even begin thinking about the emotional needs of his brothers and how he, of all people, is supposed to provide that. As it stands, he’s pretty sure he’s already neglected Choso’s emotional needs.
“I, uh-” Sukuna stammers, casting a glance at the bandage on his palm. That was- what-? Thirty minutes ago? Why does it feel like ages ago? Why can’t he think straight?
Sukuna’s jaw trembles and he swallows. Fuck, he can’t breathe again. Bile gathers at the back of his throat. He wants to vomit.
“Kuna loves us,” Choso chimes in suddenly, the little boy’s quiet voice interrupting Sukuna’s spiralling thoughts. “He’s the best big brother, he makes me happy.”
Sukuna damn near chokes. His eyes are hot with tears and he rubs furiously at them to prevent any from falling down his cheeks as Choso speaks up, practically saving his ass. Sukuna’s throat tightens as he leans forward on his knees. Does Choso really feel that way? Or is he feigning happiness for the social worker?
Sukuna chances a glance backwards to his little brother, examining the look on his face. Choso’s eyes are sunken, he’s tired. He’s become a shadow of his former self, much like Sukuna, and the oldest knows that he’s contributed to the anguish Choso feels. Yet still, the little boy has leapt to his defense. He’s kept the house in order, fed himself, and helped to take care of Yuji.
Now he’s taking care of Sukuna, too. Sukuna isn’t sure whether he’s more pissed that his nine-year-old brother is looking after him, lost because a child is handling things better than him, or shocked that Choso’s coming to his defense at all given how shitty Sukuna’s been. He’s failed Choso at every turn, yet the boy never seems to hold it against him and that kills Sukuna.
Regardless, the social worker seems pleased with that response. “Seems you already have things in order. Do you mind if I have a chat with your little brother?”
“Go for it,” Sukuna barely manages to whisper, lost in his thoughts.
“Great. We’ll review the documents after.”
How long Sukuna sits there staring at Choso as he types up his homework, he couldn’t tell you. The only reason he’s snapped back to the present and pulled from his thoughts is from the hoarse “I’m done,” that Choso manages as he hands Sukuna his laptop to take a look at his writing.
Sukuna stares blankly at Choso, holding his laptop in one hand. Did Sukuna ever deserve to look after these kids?
Is Sukuna at that stage again? Has he gotten as bad as he was when he first started looking after his brothers?
It’s been so long since the ordeal with the social workers, since Sukuna spent most of his time laid out on the bathroom floor or curled up in bed with freezing hands and a burning throat, and yet… Has he changed at all? Is he any better?
You may have reassured him that the kids love him, that he’s a good guardian, and yet… he’s still not so sure. Not after he failed you, Yuji and Choso.
God. Poor Choso.
Whatever piece of Sukuna died back when Jin passed away, Sukuna could feel it beating and thriving once more with your arrival in his life. Now, though, it’s gone again. Its departure went hand-in-hand with that same light in Choso’s life.
And in the aftermath of his own self-destruction, he’d pushed away Toji too. Again. He’d never really let him back in, but as Sukuna sits frozen in place staring at his brother, he sees the sum of his mistakes staring back at him. A child who Sukuna hasn’t been able to provide for in terms of emotional needs.
You had. You were so, so good with Choso and Yuji. You were an angel.
Sukuna can’t help but wonder what the fuck is wrong with him as he realizes that in his frozen state, his brothers are both staring at him with worried brows. Great, now the five-year-old is concerned for him too.
Snapping out of it, Sukuna clears his throat and pulls the laptop onto his legs, reading through Choso’s evaluation on some iceberg in the Antarctic ocean. He makes a couple of grammatical fixes, before handing it back. Not a single word sticks with Sukuna, but he nods. “Looks good,” he tells Choso, running a hand through his pink locks.
Choso takes the laptop back and sends the document to his teacher before handing it back to Sukuna. The oldest brother idly stands by as the two kids get ready for bed, and it’s not until they’re tucked in that Sukuna’s mind really starts running again.
He stares down at his hands, running his thumb over the small scar he’d gotten on the day the social worker arrived. It’s barely noticeable, but it serves as a reminder of that day, of the smashed plate, and of Choso’s words. A nine-year old stepped up, because the adult couldn’t.
Sukuna can’t help the thought that for all the pride and ego he tries so hard to protect, for wanting to prove himself as a guardian, on his own, he’d failed on every account. At every turn, he’s only ever met with endless failures.
Failures that he dragged you into.
It’s not that he didn’t expect your departure to hurt- after all, he’s failed you once already- but it only seemed to jumble his mind further. At least with Choso and Yuji, he understands his frustrations. At least he knows what he’s feeling and has an outlet in his art and workouts to work through those emotions.
You, though- you’re a variable he hadn’t anticipated. Your loss weighs heavy on him, on his heart, and he doesn’t know how to unpack that. Losing you had been the final nail in the coffin that solidified two things with Sukuna.
The first- wherever it is (was) that you stand with Sukuna, that feeling can’t be replaced. Not by workouts, or distractions, or anything else he can muster to stop his mind from spiralling. You hold a place within him, within his heart, that he can see now and if he weren’t so stupid, he might not have lost you. You hurt him, sure, but he doesn’t think he cares anymore. He doesn’t even mind that he doesn’t understand what exactly the place that you hold within him is, he just knows that you’re there.
And the second- Sukuna is a coward. He’s a downright coward and a dumbass who can’t bring himself to fix his mistakes because he can’t bear the idea of dragging you back into his problems.
Sukuna was wrong.
The worst part is that his brothers ask constantly about you. Hell, he’s had to email a fake address just to placate them, and formulate your answers on his own. The amount of times he’s read through your emails to replicate your tone only serves as further harm to his mental state, weighing heavy on his heart. Both his lies towards his brothers and his mistakes with you cut at his emotions.
He was foolish to think he could manage everything on his own. Foolish to think he could manage without Uraume’s help, without the kind old woman across the hall’s help, but especially without your help.
You didn’t just watch the kids. You made them better people, you taught them valuable lessons, you were there for them emotionally. You were there for him, and he took you for granted.
You were the first person since Jin passed that made Sukuna feel human again.
Balling his hands into fists, he huffs and picks up a weight. He’ll work out until he passes out, airpods in if it only means that he can keep his mind off the things that make his chest tighten. It’s his only release from the stress of each day.
He’s about an hour into working out when his phone lights up with a call. A call that he has half a mind to think he’s hallucinating with the state of mind he’s found himself in.
His hand hovers over the green button as though it might disappear when he blinks, because there’s no world where you give him another chance. Hell, he doesn’t deserve it and he’s willing to admit that now.
Pressing down on the button, he remains silent for a moment before pulling the phone up to his ear. His breath is coming in puffs and pants due to his workout as he barely manages to squeeze out your name.
“Hey, Sukuna.”
Sukuna. He thinks he hates when you call him that. He’s grown so used to your nickname for him that he prefers it.
“Hey,” he grunts, how brow furrowed. His eyes trail the length of his room until they land on his drawing table. Strewn across the top are his sketches of you, before he managed to draw the one he was happy with, the one he gave you. He’s not even sure what spurred him to do that for you, it just felt right.
It feels like years have passed since then.
“So, um, listen,” you start, an air of nervousness to your voice, still so saccharine sweet. “One of my colleagues disappeared last week, and she left behind this whole pile of work-” you hesitate again, leaving Sukuna only to listen with his brows knit together. “- sorry, uh- she was our graphic designer and now we’re behind and we’re gonna lose a client if we don’t find a replacement like yesterday,” you groan, and he can practically hear the way you’re chewing on your lip. “I thought that, you know, with your art and all, that maybe you might…” You trail off, awaiting Sukuna’s response.
Sukuna’s brain takes a moment to catch up, still stuck on the fact that you’re reaching out.
“Sukuna?”
“Yeah, sorry,” he gruffs, sighing as he tries to make sense of what’s going on. “Why’re you offering this to me?” It doesn’t make sense, why would you come back after everything?
“Every book I’ve edited so far is missing a cover. If we don’t get a graphic designer to submit covers before Friday, we lose the client, and all of my work,” you explain.
Right. That… makes sense. You have no other reason to reach out to him and he owes you a favor. Bounds of them, actually.
“Sure.”
And he thinks he can live with being just a favor, if it’s to you. It brings him comfort to know that you’re not entirely out of reach anymore. He thinks he even feels his chest loosen just a bit.
“Really? Oh my god thank you, you have no idea how much of a huge favor this is, um-” you begin prattling off details of the job, but Sukuna’s hardly listening, too caught up on the sound of your voice. When did he get like this? Has he always been like this with you?
When did you carve yourself into his heart quite like this? A place meant only for you, one that no one else could replace. He can’t pinpoint a moment, but he hadn’t realized just how much he needed you. You’re his best friend. That has to be why he longs for your presence so badly, it’s the only explanation that makes sense.
Can he fix things?
“Can you meet up tomorrow morning?” You ask.
Sukuna grunts out a yes, giving you a time and place. The cafe he originally apologized at.
“And Sukuna?”
He pauses, waiting for you to continue.
“This doesn’t mean I forgive you.”
Sukuna’s throat tightens again. “Right,” he mutters. “See ya tomorrow.”
“See you.”
He stares at his screen for a long moment, swallowing hard. You don’t forgive him. He doesn’t blame you, but he has to try to get you to. For the kids’ sake.
He swipes his tongue over his dry lips, shaking his head.
No, he selfishly needs you to forgive him for his own sake.
–
You fiddle nervously in the early morning with the sleeves of your coat. You’re twenty minutes early to your meeting with Sukuna to go over details, but it couldn’t be helped. You can’t say you slept well with the stress of knowing your entire past month’s work relies on the same person you’re so nervous to see.
The cafe is quiet this early in the morning, having just opened. Only one employee has arrived, a woman around your age with a blonde bob in a pale brown apron. Her movements are deliberate as she moves syrup bottles and whipped cream around the counter into optimal places to keep the shop in a good working order.
The ringing of a bell catches your attention, and you think your heart may actually stop for a moment at the sight of Sukuna.
He’s still tall as ever, in his coveralls for work with a heavy black coat over them, but he looks leagues different from when you last saw him. You’ve never seen dark circles quite like what Sukuna’s got going on, his chin is dotted in stubble, and his hair is longer than you’ve ever seen it. Based on the way he shakes his head to get stray strands out of his vision, you can conclude that it’s bothering him, too.
You don’t need to know that he only shook his head in an effort to get himself to focus as all the air left his body upon simply seeing you.
He stops in front of the table, casting a glance at the shop’s counter. “Need a coffee. Want somethin’?”
You nod gingerly. “Yeah, um, just tea, please.”
Whatever words you had planned for this meeting seem to disappear into thin air as you watch him trudge over to the counter. After a short wait, he returns with your tea and his black coffee.
“So,” you begin, deciding to skip pleasantries in favor of keeping any emotions out of this. Strictly business. “I don’t know what the pay is, but my boss said you would be compensated extra for the first seven covers, since we’ll need them on a rush basis. Um-” You pause, pulling out your phone to show him examples of the style of covers you’ll need. They’re children’s books, similar to things he read in school as a child along the lines of The Magic Treehouse or Goosebumps. Coincidentally, Sukuna’s pretty good at that, he has experience.
Sukuna hums, not daring to interrupt despite the words dying to spill from his lips.
“They expect you to be in-office five days a week, but the hours are flexible and if you’re sick, then you technically can work from home,” you explain, staring at the ceiling as you go over any other minute details you can think of. After prattling off a few more details that Sukuna can’t possibly imagine actually matter, you realize you’re rambling and pause. “Oh, bring a portfolio and um- it’s business casual. So, um-”
Again, you pause. Sukuna sees it in your eyes, you’re debating whether you want to tell him what to wear. You’re afraid he’ll think you’re telling him what to do.
“Wear something nice, got it.”
You blink once before nodding, satisfied. “I’m there from eleven-thirty to five, so just, um- come anytime? Ask for me at reception. My boss knows you’re coming.”
Sukuna nods. “Be there after I pick up the kids.” He’s pretty sure Uraume shouldn’t be busy tonight based on the few texts they’ve exchanged, so he’s sure he can manage to get someone to watch his brothers.
Silence hangs heavy in the air, thick with unspoken thoughts. It’s clear that a conversation needs to happen between you if you’re planning on working together, but Sukuna’s had no time to go over the things he wants to say, having convinced himself he’d never get another chance with you.
“Well, um-”
“I’m sorr-”
Sukuna bites his tongue as he accidentally speaks at the same time as you. Your hand is splayed on the table like you’re ready to push yourself up and leave already and Sukuna sighs.
“Sorry. I’ll see you later,” he resigns to let you leave, leaning back in his chair. He figures if he can catch you a little more willing to chat and not so nervous later in the day, he might stand a better chance of appealing to you.
You swallow hard as you stare at him, tapping a finger on the table. “This is just business, okay, Sukuna? Consider this my repayment for all the favors.”
Sukuna’s throat is dry as he swallows hard, nodding. “Right. Repayment.”
Before you can be the subject of any more of the strange stares he’s giving you, you push up to your feet and excuse yourself without looking back.
Your heart is practically beating out of your chest as you leave the coffee shop, clutching your backpack’s strap tightly.
What the hell was that!? Why did he spend the whole time staring at you like- like that? You’d expected huffs and sighs and thinly veiled anger. You’d expected him to be furious with you, still. You’d thought that you were in a better headspace, ready to face him and not think twice about it, but now you’ve got a one hundred horse power heart pounding like it’s about to race the damn Monaco Grand Prix and your thoughts are beyond jumbled.
You thought you were over him enough that this wouldn’t affect you, that you could be professional and strict. Instead, you’d stumbled and rambled through so many words that you could hardly make sense of what you managed to get out and what you didn’t.
Regardless of your nerves, the real question is Sukuna.
Why was he so… uncharacteristically not Sukuna? What happened to the boastful man who demanded attention with his mere presence? It was as though he’d been reduced to little more than a background character in his own life, simply going through the motions.
Not to mention that stare…?
A pang of concern floods through you as you recall what he said about how he would have handled his mental health without you. You know it’s not your place to worry anymore, as decided by Sukuna himself, but you’re too kind not to. Maybe it’s naive of you, you’re sure Kento and Shoko would tell you so. Still, it’s in your nature to worry about those you care about.
And one thing can be said for certain- you still care about Sukuna.
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❦ a/n ; in case you missed it, i did some art for the series and i'd love if you checked it out here <33 hiiiii sorry this took so long 😩 health problems were the bane of my existence last week and i just couldn't sit at the computer wrong enough to write. but!! thank you all so much for all the well wishes, i'm doing much better now and it's back to business as usual. that flashback scene HURTTTT ngl. they were all so young :(( they still are. i love this lil family sm tbh ANYWAY sorry i'm really yapping down here ig but i just wanted to say thank you thank you so much for all the love. i know i've been gone for a bit, but all the kind words and constant love and excitement for the series always has me kickin my feet n smiling <33 i seriously love you all and you guys keep me motivated to keep up my writing. lots of love and sorry for the angst 🥲
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getting stood up -or ditched- by ur stupid boyfriend and desperate for a way home cause a lil bunny can’t walk home alone at night so as a last resort, you call dads bsf price, who is more than happy to pick up his best friends little girl xx and he can’t drop her off without showing her what a real man is
ps: i absolutely adore your writing x keep it up bby
a defeated little sigh slips from your glossed lips as you stare at the text message, received fifty minutes after you’d sent the first one.
“i don’t think i’ll be able to make it tonight, i forgot about it and now i am busy, sorry!”
you weren’t sad he couldn’t make it, of course, you would’ve appreciated it if he’d at least warned you about his little slip of memory, but if anything, that little mistake only sealed your mind even more — it’s not like you were a couple, you’d only been on a date once, and this was supposed to be the second one. clearly, he wasn’t interested, and you weren’t either, but you’d been left alone waiting for him for more than a hour, like an abandoned little bunny. you didn’t deserve this, you deserved a princess treatment.
nibbling on your bottom lip, you stood outside the building, the night breeze cold against your bare thighs as you considered your options — you couldn’t possibly call your father, he’d be livid with both the guy for leaving you alone at night, and you for ending up in this reckless situation. also, you didn’t want to make him worry too much.
so, your baby pink nails clipped against the screen as you recklessly quickly typed the number of the only person you trusted the most, the only one you could think about that could come and save you. only tree ringings passed by, before you heard his deep, gruff and rough voice from the other side of the phone.
“hello?”
your heartbeat immediately increased, effected by his low tone, beating faster and nervously. he sounded rougher, huskier.
“sir?” you tried to swallow down your heart, poor thing trying to flutter outside of your chest — your cheeks were painted red, covered by a warm and bright blush.
“doll?” you caught the slight urgency in his voice, though it sounded controlled and steady as always. a few seconds of silence passed after his reply, and you imagined him glancing down at his wrist watch, before muttering out “what’s wrong?”
“i’m fine, im really sorry to bother you at this hour—“
“you never bother me, sweetheart. what happened?”
you hesitated, looking down towards your mary jane white heels “can you please come pick me up? im alone and i didn’t wanna call my father cause he’d get angry, pretty please?”
you bit your lip, torn between relief and regret for deciding to call him without even thinking twice. maybe he’d been sleeping, tired after work—?
“where are you, princess?”
“outside of a restaurant, i’ll text you the address, okay?”
the sudden rustling of fabric and the light jingle of keys echoed from the phone, and you could picture him standing up, his broad, muscular body walking towards his door “wait for me, doll, be there in a few”
less than ten minutes went by when you recognized his old fashioned car, driving up to a halt right in front of your place on the sidewalk. you mentally prayed and thanked God for sending you your personal knight, the rumble of the car’s engine the only sound around the otherwise peaceful and too silent air.
you quickly opened the passenger’s door and got inside of the car, immediately filled with the familiar scent of cigars, tobacco and expensive cologne that swirled around you.
“thank you for coming, sir,” you were nervous, you felt embarrassed, and he could see that, under the dim light surrounding the car, his sharp and intense eyes never left you, taking in the way your fingers fidgeted together, hands resting on your lap like a squirming bunny that couldn’t handle being too close to him.
even in the dark your blushing cheeks were so bright, he could see them, red and flushed — with one large hand gripping the steering wheel, he leisurely admired your short dress, before starting the engine and driving away.
“who do i have to kill, mmh?”
you almost gave out a smile, but only shook your head at him. “no one, sir, im okay”
“date stood you up, bunny?”
you loved his nickname for you. it made you blush and heart flutter.
there was no point in telling him a white lie. with a soft sigh, you leaned your head back on the seat. “it wasn’t a date..he’s not even my boyfriend. we’ve gone out once and today we were supposed to have dinner together. but he clearly wasn’t interested since he texted me that he’d forgotten and was apparently too busy to tell me instead of ditching me and leaving me all alone”
john kept driving, and you dared a shy glance towards him. he always radiated confidence and strong masculinity — he was so handsome, so respectful and manly, the manliest man that existed. he was a real man, the one you truly wanted, and no one could ever take his place in your heart, your poor heart was aware of that. a little, sweet and too young girl falling for a man too old for you, old enough to be your father.
only then, a glimpse of an amused lazy grin appeared beneath his thick, dark beard, littered with gray on the right spots. he shook his head once, focused on the road, “stupid kid, he was. he’s merely a boy, love, boys his age don’t know shit about how to treat a sweet bunny like you, sweetheart. dumb dog”
you blushed more at his words, clenching your bare knees until they touched, your thighs exposed and filled with goosebumps provoked by the chill night air and his deep voice.
“doesn’t matter, it can happen. im not sad or anything, just…it feels mortifying. he could’ve at least texted me, you know? could’ve just told me he didn’t want to go out anymore. makes me feel like im insignificant. that’s why i’ve never liked guys my age.”
you couldn’t even stop that last line from slipping out of your glossed lips, at that point, you’d just been rumbling to him. he remained quiet, listening to you as he drove, and you recognized the familiar ice cream place, the trees and local church that were close to your neighborhood.
“bunny, that kid was an asshole, ‘s not your fault. an angel like you deserves a real man who knows what he wants and what you want. not some idiot” he punctuated the last word with a gruff chuckle, the sound vibrating around the tiny space between you. “don’t waste time with people like him. could pay him a visit, if you want”
“please don’t sir” you quickly said, your lips already curving in an entertained smile, “we’re never gonna see each other anymore, anyway”
“made my bunny stay outside all alone at night, could send him to jail. gonna make him be real busy behind bars,” you knew he was being playful just to make you smile, but his voice sounded even lower, deep and rough, with a hint of threatening to it. “why didn’t you call your dad?”
you hesitated, blinking at him from under your long lashes, puppy dog eyes shy and timid as you shrugged “he would’ve gotten man at him for leaving me alone and at me for ending up in this situation, always finds a way to blame the victim.”
you saw him shifting gear, and without even realizing it, you were already on your main street. tilting your head towards the darkened mirror, you recognized your front porch, standing in the dark with no lights on. your dad must’ve been asleep, or maybe was waiting for you to come back in his room. but from the windows, you saw that all the lights were off.
“im glad i called you, sir, thank you for coming and helping me. i really don’t know how to thank you” you turned towards him again, giving him another smile.
“was a pleasure, bunny, no need to pay me back. just seeing you in this short dress is enough.” he turned off his car, smirking lazily at you with a look that made you shiver and turn into flames, flushing red and warm. you wanted him so bad, you felt bad for how much you wanted him.
you swallowed, fluttering your lashes at him, grabbing your purse and pushing your heels down, as if reminding yourself that you had to say goodbye and go. “w-well, then, thank you again, sir,” blushing like shooting stars, like the bright rays of the sun, you leaned closer to him, wanting to give him a goodbye kiss on the cheek.
as soon as you leaned over, you felt his hands grab your waist, tugging you by your hips and pushing you against his lap. you almost squeaked, and your lips found his mouth, instead of his cheek. he waisted no time throwing your legs on his sides, making you sink against him, practically straddling him. the sudden contact made you press your mouth more firmly against his, muffling a little sound as a rush of warmth spread between your legs.
he trailed his hand over your neck, until it tangled in your long hair and grabbed a fistful of it to tilt your face against his. he kissed you hard, almost violently, like a starving, animalistic man. you whined against him, throwing your hands around his neck, the pain in your scalp from how much he was pulling your head mingling with pleasure.
you parted your lips slightly as he pushed his tongue inside of your mouth, licking every free inch until it pressed against yours. his free hand trailed under the hem of your sundress making you whimper and cling closer to him. you felt the cold metal of his rings against your bare thigh as he gripped your flesh, brushing his hand up and down until it reaches the hem of your panties.
you skipped a breath, tilting your head to give him more access as he devoured your lips, crashing against them in a feverish kiss full of bites, tongue and teeth.
“sir, sir—“ your words were muffled by the kisses, but you didn’t want to stop, you only wanted him, to feel him and to be with him.
he parted only for a second, looking down at you with a hungry, dark gaze “shhh, shhh doll, don’t wan’ anyone to wake up, huh bunny?”
he grabbed your chin, pressing his mouth heavy against yours. “you know how hard it is to see you going out like this, how badly daddy wants to have you all to himself, mh?
your breath grew heavier, and you could only nod at him, breathlessly, doe eyes glimmering, big and innocent and so needy.
“look at you…so fucking innocent, such a good girl, no one deserves you, angel. gonna be the death of me, looking at me so innocently, when I know how much you want daddy to have his way with you, don’t you, bunny? a needy bunny on my lap, fuck,”
you nodded again, whining and hiding your head against his neck when his hand lowered between your legs, tracing your inner thigh with a steady movement, like he wanted to savor it, take his time, but couldn’t wait any longer. “yes sir, wan’— wanna be with you, I—“
“know you do, bunny, i know sweet thing. only this old man knows how to treat you like the princess that you are, made of sugar. shit, having to talk to your dad when you’re around, acting like i don’t wanna throw his little girl over my shoulder and have my way with her, having to hold myself back. you on your little skirts that make me go mad, your fucking ribbons…”
you bit your lip and shuddered against him, blushing shyly at his words, that made your heartbeat quicken, go faster. he always treated you so well, like he was your bodyguard, like you were his little princess. a little helpless mewl left your lips, as you sought for his lips again, pressing another kiss on his mouth, that he quickly deepened — the kiss filled the car with lewd sounds, his tongue heavy and wet against yours, but you wanted more.
“please sir, please, anything,” you whimpered, and he cooed at you, letting out another deep chuckle that vibrated against your chest. your lips were puffy and red from his mustache and salt and pepper beard that scratched your skin.
”what do you want, doll? mmh? come on love, use your words, know you can.”
you were too shy to ask him or to address what you wanted, hoped the way you fluttered your lashes innocently could speak for you. “just you, daddy..and, and…”
he softened his hungry gaze when you trailed off, and caressed your thigh. “daddy can’t give you that now, love. you deserve more than a stolen moment in the midst of chaos. and definitely not here” with a gentle tug, he brought your hand to his lips, pressing soft kisses on your knuckles. “wanna get off on daddy’s thigh? like a good bunny? mmh?”
you nodded again, shyly yet eagerly this time. lifting the skirt of your sundress to shift your position, he sat you on his thigh, coming in contact with the denim of his jeans, and you shivered when you felt the muscle of his leg against your clothed clit. john leaned back, playfully patting your lower back.
“alright bunny, hands on my shoulders, like this; good girl. now, just move your hips, back and forth, like this— yeah. good girl, like this, fuck, can feel you, see? ‘s not hard, angel” his hands were heavy and secure on your waist, steadying your movements as he guided your hips to buck against his thigh.
you were new to the sensation, didn’t know how to move, but the friction made you whine slowly, almost inaudibly. not to his ears.
“feels good, bunny?”
“mmmhh” you nodded, rolling your hips against his thigh, searching more of that strange feeling. you lowered your head, your cheeks growing red, a bright blush that he could almost taste on his own lips. you were shy, inexperienced, a virgin, and john was the only one who could teach you everything you needed to learn.
“that’s it baby, make yourself feel good. take your time,”
“don’t know how—“ you whined, desperate for his help. his hands ached on your waist, wanting to hold you, to undress you, to grasp every inch of your soft skin with his rough hands. and it was torture, seeing you like that, whining and needy for your daddy’s help, having to physically stop himself from touching you freely :(
“you’re doing so well f’me, bunny, good girl, find out how you like it, yeah, sweetheart, you should see yourself right now. pure sunshine,” he squeezed your hips and you yelped, letting out a soft whimper, your thighs clenching against his, as you tried to steady your movements, your clit brushing against the denim and making your panties grow damp.
the familiar sound of your ringtone startled you, and you almost screamed when it echoed through the dark space of the car. you stopped your movements, catching your breath. blinking as if you’d just woken up from a dream, you crouched yourself towards the passenger seat and hastily grabbed your phone, taking it out of your pink purse.
dad. his name sparkled on the screen, and you felt john physically tense against you, the muscle of his jaw thickening when he saw his name. begrudgingly, you picked up, holding your phone against your ear with a loud heart thundering in your chest.
“dad?” you tried to breath normally, your cheeks felt burning hot, and your voice was shaky. “im…im almost home, yes, it went…”
you dared a shy look at John, whose jaw was clenched, and whose hand still hadn’t gotten off your bare thigh. “I’ll tell you tomorrow, I have the keys, yes. You can go to sleep, im fine”
when he hung up, you loudly swallowed. you couldn’t believe what you’d been doing. straddling your dad’s best friend’s thigh, in his car. there was no way you could look at him in the eyes after that. your face blushed like it was on fire, and your eyes looked down at your ruffled skirt,
“I—I— thank you, sir Price, I’ll be going now—“ you stammered, your heart pounding like it never had before. you tried to reach out for your purse, but john quickly grabbed you by your chin, keeping your face in front of his — his think fingers sprawled over your jaw, and his voice was almost animalistic, a bare growl when he spoke against your lips. he was pissed, he felt like a dog who’d just been teased with a bone, just to have it taken away from him right before his eyes.
“when i do finally get my hands on you, doll, nothing and no one will take you from me, understand?”
you nodded, breathless.
“understand, doll?” he repeated, again, making you flinch with pleasure.
“yessir”
“good girl,” he rasped the word against your lips, before pressing a soft kiss on them. “now, goodnight, bunny, hop back to your pen.”
#john price#john price smut#john price x f!reader#john price x female reader#captain price x female reader#price x female reader#john price x y/n#call of duty
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| I am my father's daughter | 1 |

💖 Dad!price & daughter!reader
| Part One |
Summary: John Price gets an angry voicemail from his ex-wife saying how his twenty year old daughter took off. He doesn’t know what he’s more angry at, the fact his ex-wife’s complaining about rent money or that you took off with her leather jacket.
But he’s going to get another call…
[18+] MDNI | TW: Hurt/angst/mentions of abuse/comfort | a little bit of 141 in here too at the end/complicated father-daughter relationship
🔈Readers view of John is different, he’s come and gone in her life etc so she thinks he’s not that great. So don’t send me hate
[Series Masterlist] This was longer than I planned too 2980 words.
John and his ex-wife were both sixteen when they had you. Price later joined the military and your mother cheated on him many times as you grew up.
You were the one to break it to your dad, but in your spite for your mother you ended up hurting him.
There were a few years you didn’t see your dad, your mother upheaving your life whenever she fell in love with a new guy. It never lasted long though, forced to stay in a hotel when things went south until she found a new place. The cycle would repeat.
The father daughter relationship was strained till he got married again and your now step mum stepped in to get you back in his life. The younger brother you never heard of and the wedding your mum had never told you about, let alone the divorce. She’d also been spending the money your dad gave her that was meant for you.
You visited your dad every now and then, but it was difficult with his job and you having school.
Fast forward to you being twenty and you leave with the first guy that can get you out of your mums house. She’s never forgiven you for telling your dad about her affairs. Easy money, she said being with a military man who rarely came home.
Things don’t seem to work out for you though, they never do. You’re sobbing whilst you clutched onto your phone, hoping your dad will answer your call.
You know when you can reach out to him, he still messaged you when he’s going dark on his missions and won’t be with his phone. Followed by a short text when he’s finished, a standard one that you don’t reply to anymore.
He does answer, the one person who always seems to pick up your call. Even though you haven’t spoken to him in months. Even though you’ve ignored his name lighting up your phone screen.
“Hey, kiddo.” His voice soft and low, you didn’t deserve his kindness. Part of you expected him to shout down the phone, but he just carried on talking to you. “You looking after yourself kid?”
“Yeah dad,” you said, wiping your tears away with the sleeve of your hoody. Half a lie, tonight was the first time in ages you’d looked after yourself in the right way. No making excuses for his actions and convincing yourself it was your fault.
He hummed, music cutting off in the background as he shushed whoever was with him.
“Good to hear your voice,” you said, wanting to fill the silence. It’s like being a kid again and finally getting through to him whilst he’s at the military base, to hear him and know he’s there.
“What you doing?”
A smile tugged your lips, anything to keep you on the phone. “I’m waiting for the bus,” you said, forgetting how late it was and the fact you’d missed the last one of the night.
“On your own?”
The wind whipped through the flimsy bus shelter, your bag held on your lap for extra warmth. “Yeah, I’m a big girl now dad.”
Your mind wandered back to the basic self defence moves he’d taught you at sixteen and how when it mattered most you froze instead of fighting. What would the captain think of you?
The captain, a role he slipped back into when he didn’t know how to be there for you. Spoke to you as if he were training a fragile new recruit, measured words and slight pauses keeping him safe.
The man who told you to do anything, but be backed into a corner or made to feel small.
Small, exactly how you felt clinging onto your dad’s call. “I know you are, don’t need your old man no more eh, now that you’re grown.”
At times like this, you wished your dad would drop the tough act and baby you. He always treated you like an adult, even when you were a kid. Gave you a routine, a choice when it came to discipline, knowing that you’d rather do chores than get grounded. The captain never punishing you physically or raising his voice like your mum did. She was a whole different person when your dad went back to work for months on end.
“You still there kid?”
Tears streamed down your face, your cheeks burning in the bitter cold. “I don’t know what to do,” you sobbed, twisting the cuff of your sleeve in your hold.
You’d made such a mess. There was no way you’d go back to your mum’s and you knew that asking your dad for help wouldn’t be fair on your younger brother.
“Hey, hey kiddo. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” Classic captain saying whatever you want to hear, like your someone as brave as him.
You wanted him, but couldn’t bring yourself to admit it. “Are you home?” Part of you hoping he’d say no, so that you don’t have to burden him with your problems.
“Nah, down south at the base,” he said, pausing and there’s a scuffle behind the speaker before he’s talking again. “Just me though, didn’t want to pull boyo out of school. Exams and that.” Your brother, ten years younger than you.
“Makes sense,” you sniffled, nodding as if he can see you. “I’m sorry I called so late.” Your throat burnt, nose sore from wiping it on your dad’s old hanky. Something you kept for comfort, a reminder of him. A little cigar stitched into the off white fabric.
“Don’t be sorry,” he snapped, the no nonsense captain sounding more like a man of military than your dad. “You’re okay though, that’s why you called. To check in with your old man? Well we’re all good kid, you and me don’t you worry.”
The first time talking to him since you sent him that written letter. The one where you apologised for tearing the family apart, for hurting him.
“Why can’t you just be my dad?”
There’s a clink of his phone on the other side, as if he’s dropped it. A deep breath filtering through the speaker as he exhales.
“What do you need?”
“I need you, I need my dad. Everything is so screwed up, I’m looking at this bus chart randomly picking a place or getting on the first one that shows up.” You rambled on, the weight on your chest less now that you’ve released the suppressed anger and frustration.
“Send me your location. You know how to do that, right?”
You can’t help, but chuckle at his response. Of course you know, your dad taught you how and frequently scolded you to turn it back on so he would know you’re safe. You hadn’t shared anything with him in months, your finger hovering over the button.
“Please, don’t send mum…”
“I’m on my way kiddo, an hour and a half tops. There any places you can sit inside whilst you wait?”
You don’t bother glancing around, the small street turning is far enough away from the main road. From experience you walked as long as you could, taking whatever path and ending up at a lone bus shelter. If your boyfriend drove around he wouldn’t be able to find you tucked away in a quiet road with newly built houses.
He stayed with you on the phone, giving you the colour and number plate of the car he’d be in when he arrived. You don’t have an interest in cars so the make and model goes over your head, your focus on the number plate instead.
True to his word the car rolled up by the bus stop and he’s out before it stopped.
Your hesitant steps halted as he too stopped in his tracks. His gaze falling on your split lip and blood clumped in your brow and hairline. His head turned to the side, hands shoved his pockets.
“I’m sorry, I know…” you don’t get to finish your sentence, his arms wrapping around you and your face smushing into his chest.
Pulling away from his embrace, the rain pelted down on you. He swept your wet hair out your eyes, hands framing your face as he tilted it up to look at you properly. The pad of his thumb brushed against your jawline, so close to the cut on your lip, but he didn’t touch it.
“Why don’t we get out this rain,” he said, his touch slipping from your face to scoop up your hand in his much larger one.
You don’t move with him though, stumbling towards him as you tried to tug him back. “Where are we going?” You asked, eyeing the man behind the steering wheel. There’s no way you’d go back to your mums, you’d rather wait for the bus or go back to your ex.
John smoothed his moustache, his gaze following yours to the car. “Back to the base, got a place there with my team. That okay, kid? Or there some where else you want me to take you?”
Nodding, you let him guide you to the car and open the back door. You slid in, followed by your dad who shrugged off his jacket and draped it over you. Shifting in your seat, you leant your head against the cold window and clutched the warm jacket around you closer.
“You hungry, can stop off before we go back to base,” John said, his elbow leaning on your bag on the seat between you and him.
“No, just tired,” you mumbled into his jacket. The burnt cigar and gunpowder still lingering on the fabric, like he’d smoked on the journey here.
His voice turned to a distance mumble, your eyes heavy as you let sleep take you. Your dad’s hand resting on top of yours, as if he’s trying to tell himself you’re really here.
The sun peeking through the half shut blinds woke you a few hours later. You turned over in the bed, watching your dad’s chest rise and fall beside you. His hulking form taking up most of the bed, you could feel the heat radiating off him. Even in his sleep, the line between his brows remained.
You can’t believe you called your dad, don’t even remember getting out of the car. He must have carried you in and put you to bed.
He still slept with one hand on his chest, dog tags hidden underneath his T-shirt, but you could still see the outline of them near his shoulder. Nicks and scrapes curved his bicep, you’d never seen them before. Red angry marks and faded ones of pink he normally hid under long sleeves.
The bedroom like every other base you’d stayed in whenever you visited him growing up on weekends here and there. White walls, cold wood beneath your fuzzy socks as your feet padded across the floor. Nothing but a box with a bed in the middle and small drawers either side.
You caught your reflection in the mirror, tracing the medical tape above your brow. The red stains that once clung to your hairline and forehead were clean, a purple bruise forming in its place.
Picking your hold-all from the floor, you slipped it over your shoulder and pressed your ear against the door. You couldn’t pick up any noise outside, just your dad’s low snores filling the bedroom. Probably from all those cigars he’d been smoking.
The alarm clock on the beside drawer flashed eight, thirty seven. You wanted to crawl back under the covers and sleep for another five hours, but you didn’t fancy having the conversation with your dad. How everything would unravel and lead him to finding out why you chose to leave with your boyfriend, like there was no other option. Because there wasn’t.
You pushed the door open, regretting the action as your eyes fell on the man at the kitchen table. His broad shoulders shifting at the sound of your footsteps.
There’s no use sneaking out the house, not when a team of highly trained men are living under one roof. That and the security surrounding the place.
Simon Riley, the masked driver who hadn’t said a word to you. Now you know why he covered up, the scar on his jawline lead to the neck line of his t-shirt. You tried not to stare too long, your gaze flitting to the sweater hugging his muscular arms. He could crush you in a second.
“You’ll have to wait for your old man to sign you out of the base,” Simon said through a mouth full of cereal. “Cuppa on the side for you, heard you moving about.” He pointed to the counter behind you, steam still rising from the kettle next to it.
Of course he did, probably been waiting to catch you sneaking out. Loyal to their captain the lot of them. You walked over to the small kitchenette and grabbed the strong brewed tea.
The front door opened, another guy walking through the porch and kicking his trainers off. Sweat clung to his body, T-shirt like a second skin on his visible six pack beneath. You couldn’t stop staring till he opened his mouth. Thick Scottish accent as he spoke to himself, plucking his headphones out of his ears.
He looked around your age or slightly older, not as rough and rugged as Simon or your dad. You cringed at the comparison, not wanting to think of dad as being desirable to other women.
“Ah you must be the captains daughter,” he said, reaching around you to grab a protein bar on the side. “I’m Soap,” he chuckled as your brows furrowed. “Johnny, Soaps my call sign.”
“Well that’s unfortunate,” you mumbled, sitting down at the at the table opposite Simon. Hot cup nestled between your hands. “That to remind you to have a wash?”
You edged back in your seat, the stench of sweat hitting you as Soap walked closer.
Simon’s narrowed gaze flitted from Soap to you, but he didn’t say anything. His spoon clinking the bottom of his bowl as he tried to scoop up the last remnants of cereal. If you didn’t know any better he was rushing.
“What’s yours? Hawk, no… Hulk?” Your focus darted back to Simon, anything to distract you from the hot, but sweaty guy out of the corner of your eye.
He didn’t entertain your curiosity, his chair scraping back as he collected his bowl and dumped it into the dishwasher. Soap’s deep laugh rumbled beside you, shaking his Mohawk head and disappearing down the hallway.
You found yourself leaning to one side, trying to catch a glimmer of Soaps back as he peeled his T-shirt off. John Price, however blocked the way, your back shooting back against the chair.
Simon shared a brief look with your dad, clapping him on the shoulder as he too retreated from the room.
“Damned thing keeps beeping,” John said, dropping your phone on the table. “Can’t answer it, the screen’s cracked to shit,” he grumbled, rubbing his tired eyes as he dragged his feet to the kitchen and made himself a black coffee.
Classic captain.
You stared at the cracked screen, a chain of texts and missed calls from your ex. It beeped again, your mother’s name lighting the screen.
“You gonna tell me what that’s all about?” John said leaning back in his seat, his cup of coffee balancing on his knee instead of the table. His seat at the top of the table right next to you, his knee nudging yours.
The cup in your hand no long gave you that biting sting, the tea turning cold under your stare. “Things just got bad and I can’t go back to mums.” You shrugged it off like it was no big deal, not daring to meet your dad’s eyes.
“Boyfriend?” He said pointing to your face. You nodded, wishing you hadn’t as the pounding in your head grew stronger.
He peeled your left hand away from your mug. “Where did you hit him?” He asked tracing the broken skin of your knuckles. Nothing got by the captain.
“I think I broke his nose,” you mumbled, head dipping to stare at your lap and the pattern pj trousers.
The captains head bopped up and down. “That’s good, I take it he’s alright if he’s contacting you.” He might as well have asked if he was breathing.
“How is that good?” You snapped, ripping your hand from him and pushing your chair back with you.
“You were defending yourself kid, look at ya!” His booming voice startled you, his hand flinging to your face as if you needed a reminder.
On instinct you flinched at his abrupt movement. Your body freezing and eyes clamping shut.
You opened your eyes, Simon talking in hushed tones to your dad. The captain staring at you, glassy eyed and frown tugging his lips down. And once again you’ve hurt your dad, made him feel bad.
“Why don’t we get Toff, to check her over. Another women might make her more comfortable?"
They weren't even talking to you, but about you. Too consumed with a plan than you moving. "Check yourselves over," you said, snatching your bag from the floor and rushing to the porch.
The door close, but you were yanked back by the strap of your bag. You wanted to lean towards the door, anything to escape the horror of your fuck up. One flinch and you knew, the captain was questioning everything in your life that would cause you to react like that.
"One check up, if you want to leave after I'll sign you out. No questions asked," John pleaded, knuckles turning white as they tightened around the strap of your bag.
"Okay."
[Part two]
Not me thinking about Price’s daughter and Soap 😅 I think he’s the youngest out of all of them? Mid twenties. This was also a lot longer than I planned, I just kept writing more. Huge possibility there are errors as I'm dyslexic and I'm writing for fun.
👀 Do you want another part??? - Leya
#cod x reader#cod mw2 x reader#call of duty x reader#cod headcanons#cod fanfiction#cod fanfic#john price fanfiction#johnny mactavish x reader#john price x reader#simon ghost riley fanfiction#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#soap x reader#johnny mctavish x reader#tf 141 x reader#dad!price#captain john price x you#captain john price x reader#captain john price x female reader
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Heyyyy!!! I just wanted to day i love Ur writing and if you dont wanna do this then you can just ignore! Could you possibly write headcanons of kang dae ho with a reader who has avoidant attachment? Because i recently broke up with a guy who i rlly wanted to be in a relationship because of my avoidant attachment and now he has a new girlfriend and i just feel like shit
Hey lovely, I’m sorry to hear what you’re going through right now, and I hope you’re feeling better. Take care of yourself, you deserve so, so much <33
I don’t usually do headcanons, but here’s one for you, I hope you like it — sending lots of love <3
—How he loves you



Pairing: Kang Dae-ho x reader
Content: reader has avoidant attachment, comfort, soft, understanding, Dae-ho is a sweetheart, no games au
• Dae-ho never rushes you. He understands that trust isn’t something you give easily, and that’s okay. He’s in no hurry. He doesn't mind waiting for you to open up. He's like a calm, unbothered cat sitting on your porch—he knows the door will crack a little bit if he waits long enough.
• When you pull away after a vulnerable moment, he doesn’t get upset or demand answers. Instead, he gives you the space you need, quietly waiting until you’re ready to let him back in.
• He's unshakable. Seriously. He never takes it personally when you hesitate or retreat. Instead, he sees it as part of who you are—and he loves all of you, even the parts you can’t share or is still learning to share.
• He has a way of showing he cares without making it feel overwhelming. A simple message like how he’s thinking of you is his way of reminding you that he’s there, without pressuring you to respond. He always waits until you're ready to find him.
• Instead of big, romantic gestures, he's all about the small things—a peaceful walk, sitting on the couch in comfortable silence, or sharing a meal where neither of you feels the need to fill the quiet. He's not here to stress you out.
• He admires your independence. He doesn’t see your need for space as a problem to solve—it’s something he respects and works with, knowing that love doesn’t mean smothering you.
• When you finally open up to him, he listens with his whole heart. He doesn’t try to "fix" anything or tell you what you should do. He just listens, making you feel heard.
• He shares pieces of his own struggles—not to compare but to let you know he understands what it’s like to carry heavy things alone. Like that time he pretended to be confident in the Marines but secretly sucked at running drills. He wants his own experiences to make you feel less alone, like you’ve found someone who really gets it.
• He never sees your distance as rejection. He knows it’s your way of protecting yourself, and instead of reacting negatively, he just stays steady, showing you he’s not going anywhere.
• Dae-ho doesn’t overwhelm you with affection. Instead, he shows his love in small, tender ways. Maybe it’s brushing his hand against yours, or draping his jacket over your shoulders when he notices you’re cold.
• He makes you laugh when you least expect it—turning heavy moments into something lighter without diminishing their importance. His sense of humor has a way of melting your walls without you even realizing it.
• When you shut down or pull away, he doesn’t press you to talk. Instead, he gently says, “Take your time. I’m here when you’re ready,” and you know he means it.
• He notices the small moments when you start to trust him—like when you lean your head against his shoulder or let him hold your hand for a second longer. He never makes a big deal out of it, but the soft smile on his face tells you how much it means to him.
• Every step you take, no matter how small, is something he treasures. If you share even a tiny piece of yourself, he makes sure you know how much he values it.
• He doesn’t expect you to change who you are. He loves you exactly as you are—doesn’t matter the hesitations, fears, and all. You are you, and he loves you for being yourself.
• Dae-ho isn’t the type to give up when things get hard. Your struggles with trust don’t scare him away, they make him want to be there for you even more.
• His love is steady and calming, like a warm cup of tea you didn't ask for but secretly needed. With him, love doesn’t feel like pressure or fear—it feels safe, soft, and freeing.
• Over time, you may realize you don’t have to carry everything on your own anymore. When you finally lean on him, you see that he’s always there to hold you, without hesitation or doubt.
• With Dae-ho, love isn’t something you have to fight for or fear. It’s patient, gentle, and warm—like being wrapped in a soft blanket after a long day.
#kang dae ho#kang dae ho x reader#kang dae ho fluff#squid game#kang daeho#kang daeho x reader#squid game fic#squid game imagine#squid game x y/n#squid game fanfic#squid game headcanons#squid game season 2#squid game x reader#squid game x you#dae ho#player 388 x reader#player 388#dae ho x reader
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Something in your mouth

(joel miller x f!reader)
The third installment of Never made it as a wise man aka creed!joel
WC: 8.4k | Part 1 | Part 2 | Other fics | Rating: 18+
Summary: post hand job and phone sex; it’s the leadup and part 1 of these horny bishes goin’ on a date
Note: heyyyyy it’s me and i’m back on my bs . i know i promised the fuckening, but that was summer me and now it’s winter me.. so instead of hiding and never updating, i remembered i have free will so u get the full week lead-up and the first half of the date.. and then i’ll brb with the fuckfest okay? i promise. (also it’s actually almost done this time so it won’t take months). again, i am still merely a vessel for the spirit of buttrock joel. hopefully this part 3 is girthy enough to sate your appetite a lil bit
Tags: au no outbreak modern joel, divorced dad rock dilf joel x f!reader, picks up right where pt 2 ended, alternating pov, dirty talk, horny yearning, blowjob in the truck, still crackish, but i am still dead serious about it being hot so idc, mistakes are all mine
Thanks to Nickelback for having non stop horny bangerz to quote such as Something in your mouth
major thanks to @hoelaris for this moodboard that made me weep tears of joy bc is it so perfect

thanks to @magneticecstasy for date joel thots to be ft in this pt and the next, @auteurdelabre for telling me to let them have their happy ending so i can get back to the paris boys faster, to @syd-djarin for support, horny thots, song suggestions etc, and @itwasntimethatdidit40 for the nickelback pedro tiktok edit inspo
it really takes a village or whatever they say <3
*if u forgot what this is bc i took so long give Part 1 and Part 2 a read for a refresh <3
*if i missed ur tag or u want off this ride lemme know
okay, it's starting now:
You wake up in Joel’s shirt. It smells more like you than him already, but it still makes you grin devilishly just the same. You go about your day, a few errands and some chores, the whole time with a little more energy than usual.
When you’re back home and settled in to have a lazy afternoon, you get a little restless. Itchy fingers. It’s hard not to pick up your phone and check your messages again and again. You’re drawn to looking at the picture he sent, the pictures you took, and you can’t help wondering…
Did he wake up thinking of you? Hard, aching, and leaking at the memory of your voice.
Did he dream of all the nasty things he said he wanted to do to you? Waking up throbbing and frustrated, grinding his cock into the mattress as if you were beneath him.
Did he wake up and check his phone to confirm you were real? Making it all the way to the shower before surrendering, wishing it was your soft cunt he was fucking instead of his fist.
You know you’re fucked when just thinking about him thinking about you has you so turned on. It’s so tempting to send him something else. Another picture? An audio message? A thinking of you 😘 text?
No. No, no, no.
You can wait him out. Make him work for it a little. He’s a full-grown man. You’ve already given him enough to work with. Plus, you wanna know what he’s gonna come up with next. Right?
The lazy Sunday ends all too soon and before you know it you’re back to work. Dragging ass into the office with the biggest iced coffee you could buy. You deserve a treat to get through your Monday anyway.
A little warning bell chimes in the back of your mind as you drop your things on your desk. Ellie grumbles a good morning that matches your enthusiasm for fluorescent lights at 8 am. A little seed of guilt sprouts within you.
Is it fucked up of you to mess around with Joel? It’s not like it’s something serious. Or, does that make it even worse? There’s no way he would say anything to her about it.
“Heard you saw Joel again,” she says before you’ve even sat down. Great.
“Uh, yeah,” you reply, “Still didn’t feel right that he wouldn’t accept anything for helping with my car.” You sink into your chair, hesitating to say more. It’s too early to have a good poker face.
“So you made him a lasagna?” She questions, staring you down.
“Men love my meat sauce,” you say with a shrug.
“Gross,” Ellie grimaces at that, “please, don’t ever say that again.”
You buy her off with the rest of the cookies you had baked. She’s happy to take the entire container from you and happier to enjoy them all immediately. If she’s suspicious she’s either good at hiding it or you really don’t know how to read her.
You carry on with your morning catching up on mindless tasks, swirling your coffee around as the ice starts to melt, and trying to stay focused. Ellie turns on her music and you can’t help thinking of Joel again. It’s like he’s infected your mind and every shitty 2000s post-grunge alt-rock song conjures him up.
You can’t help wondering what exactly he would’ve told Ellie about your surprise visit. Would he have asked about you? Implied anything? You can’t stop yourself from asking.
“What did he say?”
Ellie’s head swivels towards you immediately.
“Who?”
Instantly you know you messed up. You didn’t realize how much time had passed. You shouldn’t still be thinking of him. She prods you about what you said and what you meant. Not accepting a nothing or a never mind. An uncomfortable wave of embarrassment twists in your stomach, heat blooms in your cheeks, and your hands are fidgety.
You shouldn’t have brought it up, you shouldn't be so defensive. Shouldn’t, shouldn’t, shouldn’t.
Ellie is sharp–cutthroat–reading your every move. You stare at the empty Tupperware on her desk, hoping it will reveal some sort of escape plan. A strategy to deflect. It’s too late. Her eyes narrow just the slightest bit and she follows your gaze. It clicks.
“Oh, you meant Joel?”
You’re so busted. “I..uh,” you don’t know how to finish that thought.
“Why?” She gives you such a blank-faced look that it’s unsettling. You’re an adult. Why does this feel like you got caught sneaking out to see a boy on a school night?
You try to brush it off, but it sounds more defensive, making it worse. You focus on cracking your knuckles and trying to feign a more casual air. For some reason that means you keep talking. Broken sentences pouring out of you and trailing off into a stiff laugh.
Mercifully, Ellie cuts you off. Tells you it was Tommy who mentioned it.
So, he was the one who showed up while you had your legs spread open on Joel’s kitchen counter. The catalyst to your shirt heist and hasty getaway. That makes your face hot for a different reason.
“Oh. Gross.” Ellie groans.
“What?”
“You’ve got that look on your face.”
You snort at that. Only slightly horrified that she’s so adept at picking up the tells on your face. “What look?”
You suck down the last of your iced coffee, stalling, until you’re just sucking in air. You toss it in the tiny trash bin between the two of you and decide to be honest no matter what she says. You’d rather get ahead of it.
“Was it a sex lasagna?” Her mouth is pulled into a look of disgust.
You snort at that before shaking your head, preparing to get it all out.
“Okay, look. It was a thank-you lasagna.” You pause, trying to figure out exactly how much to share. “I didn’t plan the rest of it. It just…happened. And, fuck, it was so hot.”
Her face wrinkles with confusion, then disgust, then laughter. It makes your heart rate speed up.
“I’m sorry,” your words come out like a waterfall. “I don’t want to make things weird. I want us to be friends. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sure it wasn’t serious. I’ll tell you whatever you want. It was my fault. I showed up without letting him know. I made the first move—”
“You fold quick,” Ellie notes, interrupting you. She throws her hands up and you shut your mouth, “Look, you’re both adults, I don’t care what you do. Just, please, don’t tell me any of the sex details.”
“Do you really not care? Or like, you say I don’t care and then treat me like Cheryl in the front office?” you ask.
“No. I genuinely don’t give a shit. Well, I mean, if you break his heart I’ll have to kill you.”
“Naturally,” you agree with a solemn nod.
“But,” she pauses to take a breath, tilting her head before continuing, “it would probably be good for him, don’t think he’s had a real date in a while. But don’t come back to me broken-hearted if he’s a dick—that’s just his face.”
“A date?” you echo.
She groans and rolls her eyes at you, but it’s too late.
Your mind starts to wander. With Ellie’s blessing, you don’t have a reason not to give it a shot.
The harps are already strumming as you float off into your cloud of dissociation. Your favorite daydream flickers into focus as your eyes glaze over and a dazed grin curls on your face. It’s always that same slo-mo Baywatch-style memory. That one where you caught Joel wiping the sweat off his forehead with the bottom of his t-shirt. The original temptation that led you back to him.
Somehow, every time it replays, there’s a new easter egg just for you. The ghost of a knowing smirk or a sparkly-eyed wink when he catches your eye, like a wicked little tease to pull you deeper into the dream world.
Sometimes it’s all too visceral. In the privacy of your mind, you’re free to direct the scene how you’d like. Slowly panning over the peek of soft skin and the trail of hair you can see. You can still feel the warmth on your fingertips from when you slipped your hand beneath the waistband of those navy blue boxers.
Sometimes, you create something new. You’d like to take one of his sun-faded plastic green lawn chairs, drag it to the front porch, and sit yourself down for a show. You wanna watch him mow the grass in the evening heat.
You can see the sweat beads dotted along his neck and the contour of his marble-sculpted arms as he serpentines along your fantasy world front lawn.
You can smell the fresh-cut grass and the specific blend of sweaty man pheromones that Aphrodite concocted just for you.
Your chest swells, lungs expanding, as you breathe slowly and deeply. The illusory scents fill your lungs until you release a deep, yearnful sigh. The imaginary lawn mower almost drowns out the imaginary Fred Durst bellering, It’s just one of those days, from that little stereo on the workbench.
Before you can transition into another scenario—something bounces off your face, and you flinch with a loud yelp.
“That was your warning,” Ellie glares at you. “Next time I’m throwing something sharp.”
“Okay, okay, message received.” You offer a sheepish smile, and she turns around. It seems the Limp Bizkit song was very much not a figment of your imagination. Ellie mutters along to the lyrics behind you, barely audible, as you spin in your chair to get back to work.
It’s not even five minutes later when you swivel in your chair again with another question for Ellie.
There’s nothing like having a crush on a man you barely know to truly make you delusional. You know you’ve got it bad, but it’s unfortunately just so much fun to daydream and let your mind run wild with the very limited info you know about the man.
You don’t want to worry about anything that could go wrong.
Except for, well, everything.
You still fret over texting him first or waiting. Should you send another picture with no context? Should you call? Should you wait another day?
When you notice your chest feeling tight you give yourself a reality check. It’s Monday morning. You’re at work. He’s probably at work. You can figure it out later. A future you problem.
Joel’s text comes through late in the evening.
Joel: You wearing my shirt to bed again?
You’re grinning immediately. At hearing from him first and because he fucking clocked you. You snap a quick photo. Despite being on the spot, it’s thoughtfully crafted. Just enough to show the logo and only your mouth, not your face, no extra skin, no sexy tease. Just a confirmation. You send it off, and his reply buzzes seconds later.
Joel: More
You try to bite back the grin still stuck on your face as your fingers dance across the screen. You want to tell him off for being so blunt, but for some reason, it feels like such a compliment. You’ve definitely got it bad if a thirsty one-word text feels like high praise.
You aren’t going to give in this time. You’ve still got Ellie’s words echoing in your mind. A date. You type back one line.
You: Gonna have to earn it if you want more
Your phone rings shortly after your message is delivered. Joel’s name flashes on the screen and your stomach flips. You thought maybe he’d send another dick pic, but now he’s calling you? It does check out that he wouldn’t be the texting type, to be fair.
“Hey,” you answer, voice soft, a little tentative.
“You’re gonna make me work for it, huh?” His drawl is low, rough around the edges and so stupidly sexy it makes your nipples hard. You can just tell he’s already on edge. Delight floods your veins at the idea of him thinking of you all day.
“You could use a lesson in patience,” your voice is remarkably steady, despite the way your body is lit up. You chew at your lower lip. “Thought I told you that last time we were on the phone,” you chide.
A deep chuckle rumbles through the phone. “Patience,” he repeats. There’s a pause that has you holding your breath. “I don’t think you’re playin’ fair, baby. Knowing you’re in bed with my shirt on, teasin’ me with another picture.” His voice takes on a husky, knowing tone. “Don’t think it’s patience you’re lookin’ for. Bet I know what you really want.”
Your breath catches, loud enough he wouldn’t miss it even with his busted phone. You weren’t prepared to be so affected by just the timbre of his voice. It’s fucked up the way he’s got you breathless for no damn good reason.
You can picture him in his bed. The trademark navy blue sheets. Is he fresh out of the shower? Damp hair and the overpowering scent of whatever 10 in 1 man soap was on sale at the grocery store—
“Okay. Enlighten me then. What do I want?” you finally reply.
“You want to hear it,” he continues, smooth and smug, radiating a cocky smirk right through the phone that makes your skin tingle. “You want to hear how you’ve got me hard, sittin’ here thinkin’ about you,” Joel growls, his voice thick with heat. “Thinkin’ about you wearing just my shirt.”
You bite down on your lip to stay quiet. Maybe he’s not in bed at all. Maybe he’s still out in his shop, locked in the office, a couple beers down before he dared to text you. His hair a mess from running his fingers through it, in those faded jeans that cling to him perfectly.
Either way, it seems almost cruel to stop him with a mouth like that.
“Thinking about what I’d do if you were here,” he carries on. “You look good in my shirt.” His voice drops even lower. “You’d let me push it up though, wouldn’t you? Just enough so I can see how wet you are for me.”
You can���t help pressing your thighs together at that thought. If he hears how turned on you are already, you’re definitely going to end up acting out his fantasy over the phone.
“Fuck.” he mutters, his voice breaking. “You’d let me take my time. Get my hands on those perfect tits again. Soak my fingers with that sweet pussy. Have you so worked up you’d be begging for my cock.”
He says it like it’s a fact, as if he could come over right now and you’d drag him straight to your bed—or no, like you’d be on him before he could shut the front door.
It’s so filthy, so confident. You’re so tempted to keep him going, but you pull yourself together. Biting back the whimper stuck in your throat.
“Well, damn, Joel,” you swallow down the urge to ask for more details. “Guess you’ve got me all figured out then,” you tease with a heavy dash of sarcasm in your tone.
“Not all of you,” he replies, with a suggestive edge. “Not yet.”
You let out a breath you were holding. “Look, you can’t just get your dick out on the phone, tell me how you wanna touch me, and get your way,” you manage, steady and a little sharp. “Not this time.”
“Not this time?” he echoes, half-laughing, clearly amused. “Alright. Sure. What do you want then?”
There’s a flicker of nervousness that tightens in your chest. You don’t want him to think you’re rejecting him, don’t want to risk losing the momentum of whatever this is. “I’m saying…I do want you. But, if you want more you’re going to have to do more. Show me you mean it. Like…a date.”
He doesn’t answer immediately, and your heart skips as you imagine his reaction. He’s quiet, but you can hear his breathing—measured, like he’s weighing something.
“Shit. You’re serious?” he asks, and there’s a softness now, laced with just enough curiosity to make you think he’s intrigued.
“Dead serious,” you say, adding, “But if you’re not interested in me like that—”
“Oh, I’m interested.” The words come quick, a little sharper than you expect, and they make you beam. “Fine. A date,” he says, like he’s letting the word settle on his tongue. “Friday?”
“Friday.” You confirm and stretch your neck. Your muscles are tense. Shoulders tight. All from his filthy words getting you worked up in half a second and the anxiety of your demand. “Come up with something good,” you tease, your voice slipping into something sultrier, “and maybe we’ll both get what we want.”
There’s a low growl on the other end of the line, tinged with frustration and desire. It makes your pulse throb in your clit. You almost wish you had let him talk you through it before suggesting the date. Hear how worked up he’s been over you.
“Jesus,” he grumbles.
Oh, you would’ve turned into a mess and completely forgotten to bring it up. Now you’ve essentially cock blocked yourself until the end of the week. Ugh.
“You’re gonna drive me mad.” He says. But there’s no animosity in it. Instead, there’s something new in his voice that gives you butterflies.
“Yep.”
You’re the one who hangs up first before you can hear anything else that might tempt you to stray from your plan.
……..
It’s late morning when your phone buzzes on your desk the next day, interrupting your excellent cosplay of a ‘productive employee’. You glance at the screen and your heart trips when you see Joel’s name.
You answer, trying to sound casual despite the fluttery feeling in your chest. “Calling me during business hours, Mr. Miller? You’re going to get me in trouble.”
Joel snorts softly. “Think we both know you’re the one that likes causin’ trouble.”
“I don’t know what you’re referring to.”
His voice drops lower, quieter. “You need a reminder? Cause I’ve been replaying exactly how much trouble you caused in my kitchen…”
“Don’t.” You nearly hiss into the phone, trying to cut him off before he starts with any graphic retellings. You spin in your chair, grateful when you confirm Ellie has headphones on for once.
“Right.” His voice is back to a slightly less devastatingly erotic tone. “Wouldn’t want to get carried away while you’re at work.
“Well,” he drawls, the grin evident in his voice now. “You said you wanted a date, so I was thinking.”
You hum, leaning into the teasing tone. “If it’s a chain restaurant I’m canceling right now.”
“Do I seem like the kind of guy who’d take you to Applebee’s?”
“Do you want me to answer that honestly?” you quip, laughing at the soft groan he makes in response. “No Applebee’s, no Chili’s, and if you’re thinking about taking me to whatever the fanciest Italian place is in this town, don’t. I’m not going on a first date where you used to take your ex-wife for anniversary dinners.”
There’s a beat of silence, then a grumbled, “It was Valentine’s, actually.”
You cackle, delighted at your guess. He huffs. “You’re impossible.”
“You’re predictable,” you shoot back, grinning as you cross your legs under your desk. “Or maybe it’s just ‘cause nobody has been challenging you.”
“S’that what you are?” he asks, “A challenge?”
You shift in your chair, the grin on your face is going to make your cheeks burn if he keeps this up. You soften the teasing as you admit. “Maybe a little.”
“Mm,” he grunts, clearly not convinced.
“If you’re up for it,” you add. Nerves flutter in your stomach now. Maybe he doesn’t want a challenge at all. It’s not like you’ve been hard to get. The silence stretches just long enough to make you wonder if you’ve pushed too far.
His exasperated sigh crackles through the phone, but it’s laced with something warmer. “Yeah.” But then he exhales, soft and almost self-conscious. “Ain’t a bad thing.”
The words are simple, but they settle somewhere deep, curling warm in your chest. For a moment, the flirty defense falls, and you catch the subtle weight in his voice.
“You’re full of surprises, Joel,” you say finally, your tone gentle.
“Guess you’ll find out,” he murmurs, the words quiet like he’s not sure he’s meant to say them.
Your stomach flutters at the unexpected softness. You knew there was more to him than his bold mouth when his dick is hard or the stoic lone wolf look he wears in his garage. You weren’t expecting him to be…whatever this is now.
The line goes quiet again, his breathing soft on the other end. “Friday at seven,” he says after a moment, his voice steady but quieter than before. “There’s a brewery that Tommy suggested. I’ll pick you up.”
“That sounds nice,” you reply, smiling into the phone.
“Alright,” he mutters. There’s a brief pause, like he’s hesitating, before he says, “See you then.”
He hangs up before you can say anything else, and for a moment, you’re left staring at your phone like an idiot. A grin stuck on your face. Possibly permanently.
It’s not just the idea of the date. It’s the thought of Joel making a plan, asking for recommendations, and thinking of what you might like. You figured it’d be fun to give him a hard time and all, but you didn’t have real expectations.
The week stretches on and you’re not sure if it’s moving too fast or too slow. Having a crush is wicked enough, but having a date planned makes you feel slightly insane. It’s like you’re in a cartoon where the world is suddenly brighter and the birds sing just for you.
You find yourself constantly daydreaming at work. Every Creed song Ellie plays somehow sends you into a fugue state. Snippets of Joel’s voice replay in your head.
There’s something about the way he said, “Ain’t a bad thing,” that keeps sneaking up on you when you least expect it. It wasn’t even what he said—it was how he said it. Quiet, like he wasn’t used to admitting something like that out loud. It makes you smile like a fool every time you think about it.
The worst is the evenings. At home in your room. Nothing to distract you. Alone with his t-shirt. Re-reading your brief texts. Lingering wistfully over the dick pic he sent like it’s a letter from your long-distance lover. You’ve got to get it together.
And Joel? He’s just as distracted, though he’d never admit it. At least not to anyone but you.
At work, his usual rhythm is thrown completely out of whack. He catches himself staring at the same invoice three times before finally filing it away. Tommy catches him with his Breaking Benjamin t-shirt inside out.
You’re in his head and it’s driving him nuts. He tried to minimize it. Deciding it was just the impulsive way you crashed into his world. You spread like a wildfire in his mind. The kindness in you to deliver a homemade meal. The audaciousness you have to go after what you want.
He goes weak for a confident woman and you’re so sharp and quick with him. It’s a rush, but not just because of the sexual chemistry. Not just because you’re a novelty or a break in his routine.
It’s you. It’s the way you’ve got the passion and sharpness with your words, but you’re still soft on the edges. He thinks about the way your voice had dipped when you said, “If you’re up for it,” like you weren’t just teasing but testing something, seeing if he’d push you away.
He’s not used to this. Not the nerves, not the anticipation, and definitely not the way he’s spending too much time wondering what to wear on Friday. Not that he’d ever admit it, but he even dug through the back of his closet, holding up a button-down shirt Ellie had bought him last Christmas like it might bite him. He ends up tossing it back in favor of flannel—it’s still a step up from a faded band t-shirt.
By Thursday you’re nearly useless. You drive Ellie crazy all morning, spacing out and jumping when she asks you a question. To be respectful, you haven’t mentioned the date and she hasn’t asked. Would Joel have told her? Does she know you’re losing your mind over a man who probably has holes in his sweatpants? Are you equally as pathetic?
You’re still stuck on that thought when she kicks your chair, startling you back to reality. “Come on,” she demands. “We’re outta here and you’re coming to the Main Street with me. I’ll buy.”
Turns out you’re a cheap date. The dive bar has strong cocktails and a very limited menu of fried foods to choose from. You sit outside at a picnic table enjoying the warmth of the early summer evening.
Ellie is easy to get along with. Talking animatedly about her friends. Sharing the hot goss about Cheryl and her divorce. Trying to recruit you to join the company rec league kickball team. It’s all a welcome distraction even though you still have Joel on the brain.
You do your best not to bring him up but when she mentions him you know you perk up like a heart-eyed fool. Begrudgingly, but with sincerity, Ellie asks if the date is what’s got you so distracted.
“How did you know?”
“You’re both worse than teenagers.” She rolls her eyes. “Thought bringing you here might take your mind off it.”
You snap to attention at her choice of words. “Both?”
“Don’t.”
She’s a good friend. You did need the distraction. You’re still smiling about that thought as you check yourself out in the mirror in the bathroom at the bar. There’s a poster taped to the paper towel dispenser for the cover band that plays Saturday nights that catches your eye before you slip your phone out of your pocket.
You’d blame it on the drinks but the truth is only had one. You hover over the messages. Wondering if he’s really as nervous as you. Fuck it, you decide before sending what you’ve been wondering.
You: You been thinking about me?
His message comes through so fast it’s more revealing than the words he typed.
Joel: Maybe
Fuck, why does one word have you feeling giddy already?
Joel: Have you?
He asks shortly after. You wonder if he’s second guessing himself. Is Joel nervous?
You: A little
You figure you’ll give him the same treatment.
Joel: Haven’t been able to stop, if I’m honest baby
Heat floods your face as you stare at the screen, and his next message comes before you can respond.
Joel: Friday’s been feeling real far away
That has you shaking your head.
You: Patience is a virtue
He’s quick to respond again.
Joel: Never claimed to be a saintly man
That makes you genuinely laugh.
You: Good
……
By the time Friday night rolls around, you’ve fully spiraled into a mess of anxiety and excitement. You’re not really the type to overthink a date, but there’s something about the whole scenario that feels different. It’s not just because Joel’s hot—hotter than he has any right to be—but he’s trying. For you. It’s disarming in a way you weren’t expecting.
You know that the worst-case scenario for the night isn’t bad. You know how to have a good time wherever you are and you are confident that he’s a horny bastard that will put out even if you actively try to sabotage the date. It’s that flickering sensation in your chest that hopes for more. That’s what makes you nervous.
You’re startled when Joel knocks at your front door. You check your reflection one last time before heading to the door. You figure it’s casual enough for a first date at a brewery.
Despite everything inside of you that screamed to put your tits on display again—you couldn’t resist wearing the Creed shirt. You tied it up in the front so it accentuates your figure and paired it with a faux leather skirt with a matching black lace set underneath.
It’s gotta be enough to play at the alt-rock vibe he’s still living in. You look good. Really good.
But when you open the door he isn’t the only one who’s world gets rocked. Joel stands in front of you like he was plucked from your fantasy. Freshly showered, his damp curls just starting to dry in soft waves. A plaid button-down shirt, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, showing off those strong, tan forearms. His dark jeans are markedly not as worn down as the last pair you saw him in, yet the effect on you is just as dastardly.
It’s unfair, really, how good he looks. You’re left blinking as your mouth goes a little dry while you drink him in. Who’s idea was it to have a date? In public? Fuck. He shifts, a sly smile growing on his face as he rests his hip against the door jam.
“Hi,” you mumble, still ogling him.
“You look… real nice,” he says, voice so low and velvety it should be registered as a weapon.
You know you had a smart-ass remark about the shirt on the tip of your tongue, but it’s gone. Gone… along with your morals. All you’ve got left is the intense, primal desire to do something inappropriate with his arms? Yes! Yes! Yes! The horny gremlins like your idea despite having no logistics or master plan.
They seem to have no coherent plan of attack at all, to be honest. Bite! Lick! Suck! All you know is that you need him in your mouth until your jaw is sore.
Joel huffs softly. Amused that you seem speechless. “Didn’t think flannel was all that special baby, you alright?”
“It’s not the flannel,” you mutter under your breath, but you don't let him hear the rest of that thought: Arms! Arms! Arms!
You grab your bag and follow him out to the truck, stealing glances at him as he walks ahead of you. You can’t help it. He’s so…solid. Sturdy. Sure of himself. Even when he’s out of his comfort zone. It’s doing something sinful to you.
The inside of the truck smells faintly like a Black Ice air freshener, a Home Depot on a Sunday morning, and Armor All. The distinctly Joel aesthetic lives up to your imagination. It’s lived in. Comfortable.
There’s the catchall cupholder of change, receipts, and literal nuts and bolts. The caseless CDs in the storage divider strapped to the sun visor—you recognize a couple like Seether and Three Days Grace.
Before you can take in every detail though, you’re distracted by just the sight of him driving. It’s absurd, but why does he look this good just driving? Most people can manage to operate a vehicle, but most people don’t look as fuckable as Joel does, one hand on the wheel, the other resting on his thigh. Hand! Thigh! Neck! Fingers!
You’re reduced to only being able to name anatomical features when you’re this close to him, apparently. Like an alien learning about a man for the first time. An extraterrestrial explorer propelled by the most curious desire to taste and touch every part of Joel—for research.
You’re so caught up that it takes a while to register the song that’s playing. Of course, it’s more Nickelback.
You're so much cooler
When you never pull it out
Cause you look so much cuter
With something in your mouth
It breaks the spell he has on you and you laugh, really laugh. Joel looks slightly horrified, having no idea what led to your outburst. When you’ve recovered enough, you let him in on it.
“Nice first date song. You really know how to set the mood.”
He rolls his eyes but doesn’t change the song, and you let yourself glance at him again as he drives. His profile glows in the evening sun, and you can’t help thinking how easy it would be to reach over and drag your hand down his chest, and make him pull over so you could climb into his lap. The thought has you pressing your thighs together, your pulse thrumming in your ears. At this rate you’re not going to make it through the night.
…..
The brewery is trendy. Joel hopes it’s something you like. He tries to focus on the menu, but feels like his brain is short-circuiting. It’s not the overpriced burgers or the craft beers with descriptors that don’t sound like flavors. It’s the way you're leaning forward on your elbows, chin resting in your hand, smile tugging at your lips.
The shirt is unfair. The way you’ve got it tied, hugging your body in ways that make his palms itch. Knowing you were touching yourself in the same shirt to the sound of his voice. He’s trying not to stare, trying to be polite, but it’s damn near impossible with you sitting across from him like that.
“How about this one?” you say, pointing to an option on the menu. “Probably the closest thing to what you’ve got stocked in the shop fridge.” He’d wonder how you knew what he had in the fridge, but his eyes are glued to your finger pointing at the menu and it’s consuming all of his thoughts.
You ramble on about a few other choices but he doesn’t hear the words. He’s still stuck on your hand. He swears he can still feel the ghost of your touch from the kitchen last week. Shit. His jeans are already feeling tighter than they should.
He clears his throat, trying to pull it together. “I’ll trust you.”
You smile wide at that. He’s so fucked. “You know a lot about fancy beer.” Yikes. “You got a favorite on here?” Get it together, he begs himself.
“Nah, I don’t really like beer,” you say casually. You give him a shrug and point out a cider you’re thinking about trying. His stomach twists.
“You don’t like beer,” he repeats. “But, you let me take you to a brewery?” His chest feels tight, and he shifts uncomfortably.
“They have food, too.” you counter.
“Right.” Why does he feel like he’s so out of his element? He’s been second-guessing everything about this date. He feels his gaze drifting as his eyes shift out of focus, his fingers toy with his bottom lip as he gets lost in his head.
He knows he can get you worked up just as bad as him over the phone, knows he can make you sing for him with just his fingers, but this? He doesn’t know what you want from him now. Is the date some kind of test? He knows he’s overthinking all of it.
“Hey.” Your voice brings him back, pulling him out of his thoughts. “I like that you planned something.”
It seems genuine. The way you look at him with bright eyes and a smirk like you’ve got something to tease him about on the tip of your tongue. “Now ask me a boring first date question,” you instruct with a nod like you’re giving him some kind of permission.
“What’s your favorite color?”
You snort laughing at him. If you’re half as nervous as him you don’t show it.
….
It works. Mostly. Your drinks arrive. The conversation flows more easily. He still gets tripped up here and there but doesn’t disappear on you again. He asks about your job, your family, about where you moved from, and you give him enough to keep things light but still playfully dodge some of his questions.
Every time he gets flustered, you catch yourself smiling, a little surprised at how much you’re enjoying this. It’s the way he watches you like he’s trying to figure you out. The way he tries. He seems to relax a little and for a moment, you think he might settle into the evening.
Then he reaches for his water, and it all goes sideways. The dangerously full glass wobbles, tilting just enough to spill halfway across the table. Joel jerks back, cursing dejectedly under his breath as he grabs a napkin to clean it up.
You can’t help it. The words are out of your mouth before you can stop them. Just loud enough for him to hear. “Trying to get me wet already?”
His eyes snap to yours. You grin, adding, “Don’t worry, been dripping for you since you showed up at my front door.”
He makes a sound between a cough and a choke. Stunned. The faintest blush creeps up his neck, reaching all the way to his ears. For a second, he looks like he might say something, but all he manages to get out is a gruff, “Jesus.”
You lean back in your chair, grinning triumphantly. You didn’t expect him to get so rattled by your comment. Not with how vulgar he’s been on the phone or when he had his hand between your legs. It’s an ego boost to know you’ve got the upper hand at first.
“Relax,” you purr.
Then you catch the way he discreetly tries to adjust himself under the table. Clearly unable to relieve the pressure. Knowing the effect you have on him is more intoxicating than the alcohol. An idea strikes you. You know exactly how to get him to relax.
“Do you have cash?” you ask.
“What? Yeah.” He looks at you confused.
You nod like he proved a point by saying yes. That confuses him further, a deep line forming between his brows.
“‘Course you do. That’s like, Dad 101 ‘carry cash in case of emergency’.
You stand and grab your bag. “We’re not staying,” you say simply.
“What?” He frowns, sitting up straighter.
You flash him a smile. “I’ve got a better idea. Come on. You said you trust me.”
“To choose a beer,” he grumbles, dropping enough cash for a generous tip on the table before letting you lead. He doesn’t argue as you walk back to the truck, just trying to catch up with your words. He opens the passenger door for you, his hand brushing yours briefly as you climb into the truck. It’s a small thing, but the innocence makes your pulse skip all the same.
Once he’s in the driver’s seat, the tension between you shifts. The silence isn’t uncomfortable, but it’s charged. You glance at him, taking in the way his hands grip the steering wheel so tightly, the muscles in his forearms flexing as he shifts.
The truck rumbles to life and another one of the horniest Nickelback songs plays—barely loud enough to recognize.
I’m loving what you wanna wear
I wonder what’s up under there
Wonder if I’ll ever have it under my tongue
You bite back another laugh as the vocals float through the cab, perfectly at odds with the vibe of the place you just left. Joel shifts, mouth twitching like he knows how ridiculous it is. “You wanna tell me where we’re headed?” he asks, voice cutting through your thoughts.
You tell him where to drive and settle back in your seat. Again your thoughts drift. Infatuated with his fingers curling and uncurling like he’s trying to distract himself. He hasn’t said much since you’ve left, but you can feel the tension radiating off him. Heavy and thick.
You catch his gaze flicker to you for the third time in as many minutes. His eyes trail over the curve of your thighs where your skirt has ridden up. It’s subtle, but enough to make you feel bold.
You smirk, pulling the visor down to check your reflection in the mirror. Fishing a lip gloss out from your bag, you swipe it over your lips, smoothing the edges with your fingertip. Joel doesn’t say anything, but you don’t miss the deep steadying breath that fills his lungs or the crack of his knuckles.
Satisfied with your lips, you tug lightly at the t-shirt, adjusting the knot, shifting the fabric to lay how you like and slipping a hand beneath it to adjust your tits in your lacy bra. You hear Joel exhale sharply, a low, throaty sound that makes heat curl low in your stomach.
“You okay?” you ask, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye. Your voice is softer now, more knowing, and when he doesn’t answer right away, you grin. “You seem tense.”
Joel mutters something under his breath. His jaw tightens. Finally, he glances at you, his eyes dark. “You keep doin’ that, and we’re gonna have a problem, baby.”
“Doing what?” you ask, your voice all innocence, though his threat gives you a prickly rush.
Joel huffs a laugh, low and rough. “You know damn well.” His voice dips, a rasp of heat that whips down your spine. “The lips and the shirt, just messin’ with me like you want me to lose my fuckin’ mind.”
Your grin widens as you meet his gaze. “And what if I do?”
“Jesus,” he mutters, his voice strained, his hand flexing against the wheel. “Trying to get me to crash into a ditch or something?”
The tension between you is unbearable now, the air thick and buzzing. Joel’s jaw is clenched tightly. You unabashedly linger on the way his hips press forward slightly like he’s trying to relieve the ache between his legs. It shouldn’t drive you fucking wild with need, but you’re gripped mind, pussy, and soul.
“Pull over,” you say suddenly, your tone steady.
Joel’s head snaps toward you, incredulous.
“Pull over,” you repeat, your voice softer now, more insistent. “Please.”
He hesitates for only a second before caving, steering the truck onto the shoulder. The tires crunch against the gravel as he shifts into park, the engine idling low as he turns to look at you. His eyes are dark, his breathing uneven, and the sight of him—wrecked and barely holding it together—makes you rabid.
“You’re gonna kill me,” his voice is rough and quiet. Infused with lust and awe.
“Maybe,” you murmur, leaning closer. “But you’ll enjoy it.”
Joel groans softly, his hand flying to your thigh, the heat of his palm searing against your skin. “Torturing me,” he mutters, his voice a low growl. “Sitting there lookin’ like that, knowing damn well what you’re doin’ to me.”
“Yeah?” you ask, your breath hitching as his fingers slide higher. “What am I doing to you, Joel?”
He exhales sharply, his grip on your thigh tightening. Why are his hands that big? Like, how are you supposed to know what they feel like and ever leave his grasp?
Your heart is pounding now, the heat in your veins making it hard to think straight. Joel’s voice drops lower, his hand sliding further up your thigh as he leans closer.
“Can’t stop thinkin’ about it,” he mutters, his lips ghosting over your jaw. “The way you’d taste, the way you’d sound, begging me to fuck you harder, deeper—”
“Joel,” you whisper, cutting him off. Your voice is shaky, your hands gripping his arm as you try to ground yourself. “Please.”
He groans again, the sound rough and desperate, and his hand moves higher, his fingers brushing the edge of your underwear. “Yeah, baby,” he murmurs, his voice thick with satisfaction. “That’s what I wanna hear.”
It makes you shudder. You feel him smile at your body's obvious responses, as his nose grazes your skin just below your ear.
“You’re so fuckin’ perfect,” he murmurs into your neck. “Been thinkin’ about you all damn week. Every time I close my eyes, it’s you.”
His words hit like a match to dry kindling, and your breath stutters as his fingers trace the seam of your panties.
“You know how hard it was to sit there at that table?” he mutters, his voice turning darker. “With you looking like this, wearing my clothes, teasin’ me.”
“We didn’t even make it to the actual dinner part,” you giggle as you trail off.
His fingers press more firmly, dragging slowly over the thin fabric, and you can’t stop the gasp that escapes your lips. Joel groans at the sound, his free hand gripping your thigh to hold you steady.
“Fuck, baby,” he rasps, his voice thick with heat. “You’re already soaked. Bet I could make you come like this, right here, without even tryin’.”
Your hips shift instinctively, grinding against his hand as he works you with deliberate precision. The friction is maddening, just enough to keep you on edge, but not enough to send you over. Every filthy word he says in your ear has you burning up.
“Jesus, you’re gonna sound so fuckin’ sweet for me,” he says, more to himself. “Can’t wait to bury my face between your legs, make you scream my name until your throat’s raw.”
“Joel,” you whisper, your voice shaky, your hand flying to his wrist as his fingers dip lower, brushing just beneath the edge of your panties. “Wait.”
He freezes instantly, his brow furrowing as he looks at you. “What’s wrong?”
You shake your head, your cheeks flushed, your body still trembling under his touch. “Not now,” you assert, your voice soft but steady. “Let me take care of you.”
Joel blinks, his pupils blown wide as your words sink in. His mouth parts to say something but the words disappear. You don’t let him argue.
Sliding your hand down to his belt, you undo it hastily, fingers working open the button of his jeans before he can protest. It’s for him. You want to do this for him. Help him relax so you can enjoy the rest of your date.
But, fuck, it’s also for you. You’ve been riding a high just from a shoddy dick pic and your muscle memory, but you’ve been patient long enough. You’ve got to see it in person and you need it in your mouth, asap. You deserve that much, right?
You slide down the zipper and fuss with the waistband until you get what you wanted. His breath catches as you free his cock. It’s heavy and hard against your palm. Radiating heat and weeping for you.
“Oh, fuck,” he starts, his voice breaking.
You hum softly, pleased, leaning in to kiss him as your hand strokes him slowly, deliberately. Joel groans against your mouth, his hips jerking slightly into your hand.
“You’ve been thinking about this,” you murmur against his lips. “All week.”
“Yeah,” he rasps, voice raw with want. “Can’t stop thinking about you. How you’d feel, how you’d look, how you’d sound.”
“Show me,” you whisper, lowering your head to taste for yourself. You like a hot stripe from the base of his cock to the tip, swirling your tongue around the head.
Joel’s breath stutters, his hand flying to the back of your head as he watches you. “You’re so fucking good, baby. Like a fucking dream.”
You hollow your cheeks, tongue gliding along his length as you take him into the heat of your mouth. You have to use your hands to work the rest of him, still slowly and deliberately. Every sound he makes, every twitch against your tongue, every flex of his core, and tightening of his fingers, it all drives you wild.
It has you moaning with need around him. Your cunt soaked and pulsing, begging for attention between your legs as you focus all on him. It’s just as much for you as it is for him.
His head tips back against the seat, a rumbling grown spilling from his lips as his hips shift beneath you.
“Shit.” he pants, voice cracking. “You’re gonna make come so fuckin’ hard. Bet you’d look so pretty with my come on your tongue.”
The sheer filth of his words spurs you on, your movements quickening as you savor every groan, curse, and sharp inhale from him. “Fuck—just like that.” He encourages you, adding firm pressure to the back of your head as his hips jerk and he loses control.
“You want it?” he asks desperately as you moan in affirmation. You’re voice is still vibrating through him as he starts to come, hot and heavy on your tongue. You don’t stop until his body goes slack beneath you, his chest heaving as you finally pull back.
He looks wrecked, mouth hanging open, sweat on his brow. You give him a devilish smile before opening your mouth to show him. He stares at you, eyes dark and hazy, before cupping your jaw in his palm as you swallow.
“Told you,” he huffs, “so fucking pretty with my come on your tongue.” A bright, satisfied smile spreads on your face at his praise. He pulls you in closer for a kiss. When you pull back a frown pulls at your mouth.
“What’s wrong?” Joel asks hurriedly.
“I didn’t get to see,” you muse. “Will you take a picture next time?”
“Fuck,” he looks at you with awe and pride. “Yeah, baby, of course.”
“Good,” you nod, readjusting and settling back into your seat. “You think you can relax a little now?” you ask, tone teasing.
Joel lets out a breathless laugh. He drags his hand down his face. “You’re unreal,” he mutters, voice still hoarse. The phrase makes you beam with pride. It’s the same remark he made over the phone last week…right before he said ‘got me shooting loads like a fucking teenager’.”
The gratification just from seeing him this wrecked is like a drug. He’s every bit as enticing and addicting as you hoped and feared. You squeeze your thighs together once more and take a deep breath. Committed to the rest of your idea for saving your first date with the divorced DILF of your dreams.
“Back on the road. We’ve got places to be.”
Joel blinks at you, still trying to catch his breath. “You’re serious?”
“Yep,” you smile lazily, tugging gently at his arm. “Drive.”
He shakes his head, muttering something under his breath about you being the death of him, but he shifts the truck into gear, his hand lingering on your thigh as he pulls back onto the road.
THANK YOU FOR READING PLEASE TELL ME IF YOU ENJOYED OR HATED ANY OF IT <3
dividers by @/cyberangel-graphics
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#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller smut#joel miller#pedro pascal#pedro pascal fanfiction#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x f!reader#divorced dad rock dilf joel#creed!joel#pedro pascal character fanfic
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nipple piercings pt. 1
NSFW
characters: luffy, zoro, and sanji x fem! reader summary: the monster trios reaction to your new nipple piercings content warnings: established relationships, nipple sucking, breast play others: lowercase intended, not proofread, pictures from pinterest

_____
Monkey D. Luffy
you had recently gotten them done, so while they healed, you wore thin clothing instantly drawing luffy's attention. he was immediately fascinated by your new piercings.
he'd probably poke at them with a childlike curiosity, his eyes wide with wonder. "wow, these are so cool! do they hurt?" he'd ask, genuinely intrigued. surprisingly, as you explain the sensation and the reason behind getting them, luffy would listen intently, absorbing every word.
as the days went by, luffy would occasionally bring up the piercings in conversations, always with the same level of excitement. "babe, show me those cool piercings again," he'd say, his eyes sparkling with interest. he'd honestly never get tired of seeing them.
your first time fucking after getting them ignited a side of luffy you rarely saw in bed. luffy was extra careful and attentive as his hands trailed up your body before resting on your breast. his calloused hands cupping them as his thumb softly ran across the piercing, tracing its outline.
"does it feel good?" you nod, back arching, pushing your breast further into his hands. without warning he'd roughly flick the piercings, soaking in your reaction with a mischievous grin.
"i wonder how they taste," he'd say before leaning in to give them a teasing lick, his warm breath sending shivers down their spine. the saltiness of your skin mixed with the metallic taste of the metal bar tasted so good. he licked, sucked, and bit, giving your nipple the attention they deserved.
Roronoa Zoro
zoro would have a more intense reaction to your new piercings. you quickly ran to go show him the minute you and nami returned back to the sunny. you found him resting against the headboard of your shared bed.
his eye opened the second you entered the room, waiting for a kiss (something you always do after returning to him) instead you just stood there at the foot of the bed with a mischievous grin.
"what?" he'd asked, instead of answering you lifted up your shirt and showed off your new piercings.
he would stare intently at your bare tits and the contrasting silver bar with a playful smirk on his lips. "didn't think you had it in you," he'd tease, his voice a deep rumble laced with arousal.
"come here, i want to get a better look," the second you are close, he would pull you over his lap in a straddling position. while his hands rested on your hip, his eyes never left your breast. he wanted nothing more than to take them into his mouth and hear how you sounded to a new sensation. but first, he had to make sure you were okay. be began throwing questions at you.
did it hurt?
how much did they cost?
and lastly, how sensitive are you right now?
once he knows that you are okay, his grip on your waist will tighten, pulling your body closer.
without reserve, his lips would pepper you with kisses trailing from your neck down to the piercings, giving them a gentle tug with his teeth. causing you to grip his hair releasing a moan from the sensation, one he hadn't heard before.
"mmh, i like that," he'd grunt against their skin, his breath hot and tantalizing. "these suit you well, baby." his voice husky as he lifted his eyes wanting to watch your reactions closely as his fingers tugged and pulled on one while his mouth bit and sucked on the other. his eyes darken with lust as he takes in the pleasure written on their face.
Vinsmoke Sanji
before parting ways with nami you tell her to send a message to sanji about you needing him in your room. you sat on the bed, nervous and excited ready to show sanji how you spent your evening.
sanji, ever the romantic, would be utterly captivated by your new piercings. "holy shit baby," his eyes would widen in surprise and admiration, a very noticeable blush spreading across his face. "how did you manage to make yourself even hotter," he'd say, his voice filled with genuine awe.
"may i?" you nodded, even though you were still pretty sore, you craved his touch. he'd gently cup you breasts, his fingers brushing over the piercings with a feather-light touch. loving the contrast between your soft warm skin against the cool metal bar.
his touch would become more confident, his fingers teasing the piercings with a mix of tenderness and desire. causing you to let out a kitten-like moan. which further turns him on, "i want to make you feel incredible," he'd whisper, his breath warm against your skin.
his lips would follow the path of his fingers, kissing and licking around the piercings, his touch sending waves of pleasure through your body. "look at how swollen these bud are," he says, pinching your nipples harder.
"sanji," you managed to moan out.
"hold on my love, i'm just getting started," with lips still attached to your breast, his hands toy with the band of your shorts, dipping inside skimpy underwear.
_____
I just wanted to thank everyone for reading and liking my work >.<. it means a lot!!
I'm working on part 2 atm still, I hope you guys enjoyed this one!!
in the meantime, feel free to check out my kid one shot >.<!
#monkey d. luffy#roronoa zoro#vinsmoke sanji#one piece x reader#one piece headcanons#luffy x reader#zoro x reader#sanji x reader#luffy#zoro#sanji#one piece smut#monster trio#straw hat pirates#luffy smut#sanji smut#zoro smut#straw hat luffy#black leg sanji#zoro x y/n#op smut#sanji x y/n#luffy x y/n#one piece x you#one piece x y/n#x reader#x reader smut#op fanfic#fanfic
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Messages/Advise from your Spirit Guides - Pick a pile

Pile 1/ Pile 2/ Pile 3




My Paid Readings | My insta | My October Goal
Liked my blog or readings? Tip me!
Hello everyone ! This is my another pick a pile or pac reading so please be kind and leave comment or reblog, and let me know if it resonated with you!
Note : This is a general reading or collective reading. It may or may not resonate with you. Please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. And it's totally okay if our energies aren't aligned!
How to pick : Take a deep breath and choose a pile which you feel most connected to! You can choose more than one pile, it just means both pile have messages for you!
I worked really hard on this pile please show some love by leaving comments, likes and reblogs!

Pile 1:
(The cards I got for you - The devil, Ace of swords, 9 of pentacles and 7 of pentacles)
Okay so the very first thing i heard and feel is "let go" don't hold onto things that has no value in your life, or people that doesn't make you feel like you should be a better person, the message is so strong here, for some of you i feel you holding onto some part of something and not trying to lose it, but i feel in the end it's hurting you, so your guides are so gentle and keep saying to trust in yourself and in them, what happens it's going for your best. I also feel your guides saying don't be obsessed or infatuated with the situation or someone you already know it's not right for you and you should see the signs i am sending, you deserve better and you know it, I also heard "speak your truth", "you don't have to please someone or anyone in that matter", you have yourself and that is more than enough, I also feel your guides saying communicate, don't try to bottle things up inside you, your loved ones and we care for you, I also see a situation where you had cried a lot for some reason, like a very loud sobs and hard situation but you got out of it and you are trying to heal and they are so proud of you to doing so. "I also heard, "amazing things are coming your way, you just need to be open to accept it" okay so very interesting here i feel they know sometimes you guys could be really pessimistic and have thoughts like "isn't it so good to be true?", so your guides wants you to know don't have second doubts you deserve the best, and so will it happen, I also heard this group could be quite creative or have talents or could be skilled in art, music, photography, writing but could suffer from imposter syndrome. I hear your guides telling me to tell you "keep pursuing your dreams, and not holding back" give your best in whatever you do, I also feel they are so proud of you for how far you have come and the progressed you made, I also heard we like how independent you are but sometimes it's okay to lean on someone's shoulder, i truly feel this pile is quite sensitive or just scared of how people perceive them, some of you might have overcome that mentality but some of you needs to work on it, I also heard "say positive affirmations", and do self pep talk, trust me it will do you good! Your Guides will soon reward you for your hard work and the efforts you put in work, so keep going and know you are enough, more than enough!
Wow, pile 1 your guides are so gentle and caring for you and wants what's best for you~
Angel Oracle Cards:
No need to worry - I feel as i said most of you here worry a lot, so your advise to let go of that mindset and be more present in present and do your thing and leave the rest to your angels and guides.
Ask for help from others - Exactly! Didn't I say to not bottle up? That's exactly what i mean , it's okay to ask for help you won't be a burden to your friends or your loved ones!
Trust - Trust in the timing and the divine , what happens will guide you towards the right path!
Pile 2:
(The cards I got for you - knight of swords, 4 of wands and temperance)
Okay so the very first thing i feel and heard is embrace who you are, don't let anyone's perception of you break you down, you are you, unique and loved, so damn them, let them say, because that's just their insecurities projecting on you. Don't let people's words or things get to you. I feel your guides are very straight forward like no sugarcoating things, just tell it as they are. anyhow, i feel that you might have the tendency to protect people or "save them" like fix them, i heard don't do that, it's not your responsibility to do so, The love you give to others, give to yourself too. I also heard "we have more than one surprise for you", "you have been very good, trying to be better, than you previously were, so we want to reward you" Okay so i feel your guides are trying to be mysterious here lol, not telling you but giving you a gist, now it's just up to you to unwrap the present , and know if it's a blessing in disguise, I also feel your guides telling you to be more focused and not having second doubts on the decisions you take, they also want you to be confident, to be open to opportunities, letting it flow, instead of controlling the outcome, some of you here, might have the tendency to do so, I also feel this some people in this pile might be more on a positive side, like taking things as a lesson, and that's what your guides is also proud of they want you to learn, not dwell on past. Anyhow I also feel, new opportunities, including jobs , studies could be on your way, just don't let it slip through your hands, be firm in setting your boundaries, i also feel there would be a certain milestone you all would be receiving. I also heard "be more gentle with yourself", I also feel your guides telling you to embrace the changes and your growth, but also to balance your emotions, not just react but also to look at other person's pov, not everytime, but at times, i also feel this pile could be very spirutual, for you i am also getting that you should guys start to mediate, it will help you in the long run!
Okay so pile two your guides are quite straight forward with you, and gave you messges and advise and they want you think on it and do what your gut tells you to and not doubt yourself too much!
Angel Oracle Cards -
Listen to your intuition - Okay! so this is interesting didn't I say don't doubt your decisions , so this card conveying for you to follow your gut, in situations, because i think this pile could be quite intuitive or almost never wrong!
Forgiveness - your guides wants you to move forward and stop dwelling things that has happened in your life and forgive yourself for anything you could have done intentionally or not intentionally.
Pile 3:
(The cards I got for you - 4 of swords, 7 of swords, the hermit and the king of cups)
Okay so the very first thing i feel is this pile needs REST AND TO TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES, not just physical rest and sleep but also emotional rest and to take care of your emotional needs, I also feel this pile might be quite introverted but try to give their best to other people, or try to fit in or just want to have some validations at times, from another person, and so i heard "you just need yourself to accept yourself as you are, nobody can do it better than you" I also feel this pile should check out pile 1, could have some messages for you there, I also feel for some of you there might be some two faced people around you, who could have backstabbed you or want to betray you so beware of them, and do enjoy your own company because in the end it's you who you need. I also heard "hope", so i feel there could be a time where you were in darkness like you not knowing something or being completely alone which has for sometimes made you feel that you need company but all i hear from your guides is "being alone is better than in being fake people's company", but anyways, rest is literally required for you, i heard that too many times, i also feel this pile could take too much stress on them so your guides wants you to go easy on yourself, I also heard "give respect the way you receive it", Don't let people know you too much, you already know the truth just accept it. I also feel some of you could lie very well? like other won't know if you are lying or not. But anyhow, I feel this group hasn't unlocked their full potential, but if you focus on your growth and self, i feel it would be easy, i heard your guides saying to "love yourself more, and stop dwelling on other people for your happiness" , I also heard and feel your guides are stern but yet sweet, like a parent lol, I also feel and heard, your guides also wants you look more with in, and find solitude in yourself, "I also heard a journey of self-love", didn't i say your guides asks to love yourself more, and be more gentle and compassionate towards yourself, I also feel water and air energy in this pile sun/moon/rising, especially cancer and gemini, I also feel your guides saying to be more nurturing towards your needs but also to understand yourself more, trust your guidance too!
Okay so pile 3, that was for your messages and advise! Your guides are super nurturing, i felt emotional reading for you~
Angel Oracle Cards -
Peaceful Resolution - Okay so i feel if there is a conflict around your household , your guides want you to cooperate and come on agreement which will be mutually benificial for you and the other part, I also heard "don't lose your cool".
The situation will improve - I feel if the situation around you has been hard i see it getting better for you.

Thank you for stopping by! Take care and remember you are loved <3
#tarotcommunity#tarot reading#tarotblr#tarot cards#pick a card reading#pick a pile#thetarotwitchcommunity#divination#pac reading#future predictions#future spouse#spirit guides#witchblr#divine guidance#love reading#meditation#intuitive readings#tarot blog#spirituality#astro notes#psychic#intuitive tarot reader#astro observations#pick a card#pick a picture#spiritualgrowth#free tarot readings#tarot exchange#pick a photo#pick a tarot
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Congratulations on 1k followers!! It’s so deserved!
Id like to request prompts 32 + 41 with Quinn Hughes. Maybe with insecure reader ~~<3
prompt no.32: “did I stutter?” + prompt no.41: “you’re it for me.”
dating a professional athlete wasn’t for the faint of heart—that much you’ve learned in the past 7 months of being in that very position.
other wags has warned you about the fans and reporters. how boundaries will always be crossed, and even through your man is the one in the spotlight, it feel like you too are under a microscope. jealous girls will pick you apart, commenting on your weight and appearance and what colour lipstick you wear until you’re doubting yourself.
nosy reports will comment on how you treat your man. are you cooking for him? making sure his laundry is done? cheering loud enough to look supportive but not loud enough to be heard. they’ll reprimand you if you speak out or speak up for what you believe in if it doesn’t align with your views.
they’ll call you a gold digger if you don’t work, but if you do have a career, you’re selfish for not devoting all your time to your man.
look right.
act right.
perfect yourself.
at first you didn’t think much about it. for the first few months of dating vancouver canucks captian quinn hughes, it was private. soft launches that had fans knowing, but not enough proof to label what the two of you were to another. but as you got more comfortable, so did the hockey world.
girls would leave awful comments on your pictures and send you cruel messages—you’re not skinny enough, or pretty enough for quinn. you dress like a slut or sometimes you dress like a prude. you look like a bitch. you’re only dating quinn for the paycheque—even worse, you’re only dating quinn as a stepping stone for his brothers.
you tried to ignore all the negativity—from awful fans and sports blogs that have nothing better to do than comment on you—and focus on the positive comments. but even that proved to be difficult.
it started to take a toll on you, and quinn noticed. at first he waited. he didn’t want to push you into talking about something that made you uncomfortable. quinn wanted you to come to him and/or let you work it out on your own. it’s not that he didn’t care, but he knew you were strong and determined, and he knew you didn’t care about strangers opinions.
until you did start to care.
it’s almost midnight as you stand at quinn’s bathroom vanity, slowly massaging moisturizer into your skin as quinn steps out of the shower behind you. smoothly he wraps a fluffy towel around his hips, water trickling down his chest as he makes his way over to you.
you smile at him through the mirror, but it doesn’t meant you eyes. quinn’s lips tug down, pressing his warm chest against your sleep shirt covered back as he brings you into his arms.
you sigh as he starts kissing your neck. there’s no hurriedness to them, or an underlying desire, but instead the kisses or soft—intimate—and reassuring.
you gnaw on your lip, head falling back against his shoulder. “feels nice,” you whisper into the steamy bathroom. quinn doesn’t answer you, his hand slipping up your thigh and under your t-shirt, fingers skimming higher and higher up your body—feeling you. your lower half becomes more and more exposed, and your eyes narrow in on your bare skin like second nature.
thighs with imperfections that you haven’t shaved in a week.
when was the last time that bitch got a wax? poor quinn is with a beast.
your lower belly, protecting your uterus but bulging out in a way that creates a bump.
is she pregnant? she looks pregnant
your hands, hanging limp at your sides.
he’ll never put a ring on a girl who looks like that.
your breathe catches, body tensing in quinn’s hold. he pauses, raising his head from your neck and catching your eyes in the mirror. expect you’re not looking at him, but yourself.
“hey,” he starts softly, spinning you around in his hold, giving you no choice but to look at him. “what’s wrong honey?”
your lip trembles, “nothing.”
his palms slide up to your face, holding your cheeks in his gentle hands. quinn tilts your head back, just enough so that you can’t hide away by looking at the floor. his thumbs stroke your cheeks smoothly, a frown on his face. he doesn’t believe you for a second.
“it’s not nothing,” quinn says, “is it something online?”
shock registers across your face. you never told quinn about what’s happening on social media and nasty comments, mostly because you were too embarrassed to admit that it was bothering you. your mouth opens, but nothing comes out.
quinn’s intense gaze doesn’t falter, and neither does the soothing movement along your face. you sniffle, “it’s just…” you trail off, “am I pretty enough?” you ask after a beat, voice timid and seeking as you blink up at quinn.
“are you pretty enough?” he repeats, brows pulling tightly together in confusion. “of course you’re pretty enough. you’re more than just enough?”
“but like-“
“did I stutter?”
you blink. despite his reassurance, you can’t help the wave of insecurity that’s rushes through you. when hundreds of people all comment on your appearance, negative and condescending, over and over again, you can’t help but start to believe it.
and quinn knows what it’s like being put on a pedestal only to meet others high expectations. then getting slashed down, degraded and belittled like some toy. it’s awful, but that’s just about his game. he can’t even imagine something commenting on your appearance, knowing you can’t change it.
“they say i’m not good enough for you,” you tell him after a beat, picking at your own hands absentmindedly like a nervous tick. even hearing yourself say those things makes you shiver.
quinn shakes his head, pressing a soft long kiss to your forehead. “don’t ever believe that for a second,” he says, lips brushing your skin, “you’re it for me, okay?” 
and somehow that’s enough.
—
(unedited)
#🍾 ⊹˚₊ 1000 celly#❣️answered#quinn hughes blurb#quinn hughes imagine#nhl blurb#hockey blurb#🤍⊹˚₊ cute and hughesy fic
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The catfish price things is giving me vibes of “I’ll make her pay for daring to play with me like that, I’m a god damn respected man” and then just stalking her for a few days until he finds the perfect opportunity to make the pretty little thing pay, maybe take *real* pictures of her, after he messed her up pretty cute, filled up holes.
"Oh, you're fine," John clucks, verging on dismissive when she tries to twist out of his grasp again. He yanks her back by her hips before she's managed to wriggle even an inch away, relishing in the sound of her ensuing yip.
She squeals from where she's bent over the back of the couch, little feet kicking out, her painted toes barely grazing the floor. Her pleas come out garbled, muffled by the ring gag in her mouth. It's more than fair after what she's put him through. As much as John enjoys the sound of her pleasure, he prefers this, only the squelching sound of her pussy every time he fills it up and her pathetic little mewls.
He likes the way she looks like this. Hands bound at the wrist, toes curling and flexing every time he bottoms out, still a bit too tight to take him to the root. She clenches deliciously around his length, tighter than sin, hotter than hell. Everything he'd imagined she'd be like in the weeks since they started chatting online. The only thing he's thought about since the first time she messaged him unprompted and he laid eyes on the sweet thing smiling back at him from the photo next to her name.
"Miserable little thing," he murmurs, fingers squeezing into her hips hard enough to bruise. He'll have to tend to those later when they bloom. "After everything I've done."
John likes to think that he's a good man, but even his patience has its limits. He can handle being blown off once or twice, but five times in a month? While still brazenly asking him to send her another month's worth of rent? If he's going to be taken for a sucker, then he thinks some taking of his own is well deserved. Earned, even. He's paid three times over for the wet peach between her legs.
No one would call him the most technologically adept, but what he lacks in know how, he makes up for in resources. It hadn't taken him long to find her - or, more accurately, it hadn't taken the intelligence analyst whose shoulders John had held in an ever intensifying grip long to find her. After that, all he'd had to do was put in for his leave and pack an overnight bag before plugging her coordinates into phone.
"C'mon, 'nough of that. Can't push a man this much without expecting him to snap."
She wails something unintelligible behind the gag, but he's long learned to tune her protests out. She'd been full of them when he'd barged into her apartment earlier, steamrolling past her. The display of innocence would've been more impressive if he weren't in such a foul mood, in no right mind to hear the woman that'd been bleeding him dry for weeks claim to have never so much as heard his name before.
He lets go of her hip just long enough to pull his phone from his back pocket, sliding the camera open and framing everything from the line of her back to the soft curve of her ass. The soft shutter of his camera is loud enough for her to crane her neck back, eyes going wide at the sight.
"Don't worry, sweetheart," John tuts, tossing his phone away and bearing down over her until he can run his nose down the sweaty line of her neck. She shakes when he widens his stance, seconds from letting his mind go blank while he thrusts into her like a rutting bull. "You'll get yours too."
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ᑎᑌᗰᗷ 𓌉◯𓇋
A/N: Part three was posted back in January. Where did all the time go? Sorry, pookies!! Part four is here, and updates will be a bit more regular (hopefully)! Remember, my inbox is open. Share your opinions and requests!! I hope you guys enjoy this one. The calm before the storm. Also I'm not sure how hospitals work in america, I'm british so like...
PART 1 -> PART 2 -> PART 3 -> PART 3.5 TW: Substance abuse, abuse, alcoholism, relapse, self-harm, neglect etc

𐙚"Nothing about the way that you were treated ever seemed especially alarming 'til now" -Harry Styles𐙚
You didn't stay long at the hospital; you never liked them. The same sterile cleanliness that brought others comfort-caused you to feel uneasy. It was almost like the shine of every surface was judging you.
Damian, ever the protective brother, had been visiting the maximum number of hours. One time, the nurses almost had to drag him out. The thought almost makes you smile; he does care. You wonder what excuse he's telling Bruce, but only for a second. You didn't like thinking about your father that much
Sitting at the edge of the bed, you watched him hold onto your bag. You wanted to give him a smile, just to reassure him, but you couldn't. You had already lied enough, and he had made it clear how much he hated your lies. Just as you were about to get up, your phone vibrated in your hands. It was the first time someone called you first; it caused your jaw to clench.
Your palms now feel sweaty. Why was Alfred calling? You should answer. You should answer. He had been the only one that was sending you constant messages, of course you should pick up.
With a shaky breath, you answer the call. In your best 'I'm doing amazing as always' voice, you said hello. Even if you could feel a lump start to form in your throat, it was believable.
"Ah, hello, Miss. I know it's rather early, but it's been a while since I've heard your voice."
His words were so soft, and now you want to cry again. Because you didn't deserve to be spoken to like this; you didn't deserve the gentleness. The lump in your throat was starting to sting as you tried to form an answer.
"Yeah...sorry about the sudden leave-"
"It's alright, Miss. I'm sure you had your reasons."
The way he cut you off, something seemed wrong. There was a long silence followed after, your eyes were starting to sting now. Looking at Damian, who was already glaring at you, you just waited for Alfred to say something, but he didn't. He waited for your voice, waited for your words. It didn't make sense to you, did he know? No. He couldn't. You trusted Damian.
"I...did. I just had to take some time to clear my head." Your words quieter than what you wanted.
"I thought so, but may ask where?"
"...excuse me?"
You didn't mean to sound as nervous as you did, but what did he mean by that? Maybe you were just being paranoid, and maybe you shouldn't have answered his call, but it felt so weird. Usually he would believe everything you said.
"I went over to your apartment to drop off some food, but you weren't there. It seemed empty, and cold."
"Ah."
You couldn't say more; there was a pit forming in your stomach. It was foolish, but you ended the call abruptly. Your phone landed on the springy mattress while your hands held your face. It was only for a moment; your hands ran through your hair as you got up and offered Damian a smile. You hoped that it looked real, and you hoped all of your energy looked real.
"Thanks for the help, bud." You say, picking up your phone again, the mere action making your palms sweaty. It vibrated again, a notification. You swallowed thickly, pushing everything down. You breathed a sigh of relief as you saw that it was only Roy. God, did you need him right now
Roy: Hey Im here now :) Roy: meeting me in the car park?
Damian watched as your whole demeanour changed just because of two messages. Your shoulders aren't as tense, and your face softens. How could you just do that? Why weren't you angry? He sure as hell was. He gripped your bag tighter, looking down at his feet nervously. Of course, he hadn't told anyone yet- how would he? But it's been hard keeping it in. Especially since no one seems to care.
"Her apartment's empty? So what? It wouldn't be the first time."

You breathed in the not so fresh air, it was still better than that room. You felt like you were going to go crazy if your were surrounded by those white walls any longer. You walked around the car park, looking for that familiar number plate. It had been a while since you'd seen Roy, your recent conversations have purely been behind a screen.
"Who is picking us up?" Damian asked, trying to look at your phone.
"Oh it's just Roy."
"...Harper?" He repeated with something a bit too close to disdain.
"Yeah, Roy. Why do you sound like that? Why do you look like that?"
You asked, referring to the face Damian now put on. It almost made you laugh. Your family had mixed opinions on Roy.
You, for one, adored him. He was a lot different from the loud, opinionated party boy you knew; he changed. He changed just the right amount to raise a beautiful little kid. Plus he was probably the only one that cared about your sobriety.
You tap your foot against the cold concrete, the sound echoing in the otherwise quiet space. Your eyes flicker from your phone to Damian, whose expression is unreadable. The air feels almost suffocating again, thin, as if it’s pressing against your chest. You glance back at your phone, pretending to check for messages, but all you can think about is the way his eyes won't meet yours.
The cold wind stings your face, each gust reminding you of the chill that has settled between you two. It wasn't fair, you hated that you just expected him to be normal after all of this. But obviously he wouldn't be, what did you expect? The moment stretches, the silence so thick it’s uncomfortable—like you’re both waiting for something to break but neither of you knows what to say. Thank fully you eyes meet a different green pair, they're softer. They've got an odd look of sadness in them, you're just happy He's here.
Roy, he's finally in Gotham. It feels like forever, and sadly he's here because you fucked up. Royally fucked up.
Taglist ˙⋆✮
@mangogoesfishin @pix-stuff @navs-bhat @kore-of-the-underworld @jjsmeowthie @classicsimpforaaronwarner @alleycat4458 @ceridwyn3 @jscrawls @staarflowerr @simpingpandas @galaxypurplerose @ninihrtss @nessielovesfood
A/N: Sorry about this being short, chapter four is gonna be out sonner and hopefully longer. <3
#fizzah's ff#batfam x batsis#batman x reader#batsis!reader#batboys x batsis#batfam x reader#batfamily x reader#roy harper x reader#robin damian#damian wayne x reader#roy harper#bruce wayne#bruce wayne x reader#dick grayson#batfam#richard grayson#red hood#dick grayson x reader
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🎭 ATEEZ Reaction to You Getting Cheated On
You’re their best friend and they just found out you were cheated on by your partner. Here’s how each member reacts.
Ps : gifs are mostly mine except for Yungi !!
Seonghwa
How he finds out: He’s hanging out with you and suddenly notices you zoning out, tears welling up. When he gently asks, you break down and tell him everything.
First reaction: Eyes widen. "He did what exactly ?" his voice low and cold. But quickly he pulls you into the gentlest hug, completely silent at first. Your feelings are his top priority.
Anger level: Oh, he’s angry. Just quiet, cold rage. You’ll never hear him say the name again — they doesn’t deserve to exist in your world anymore.
How he comforts you: Cleans your tears with his sleeves, whispers soft encouragement. He gives you space if you need it but will sit beside you all night. Very expressive and emotionally open. He talks a lot, wanting to help you process everything. Makes sure you never feel alone.
“You didn’t deserve that, not even a little.”
Hongjoong
How he finds out: You call him late at night, your voice shaky and quiet — too quiet.
“Tell me exactly what happened.” Instant switch into protective mode. He’s calm but you can feel the anger brewing under his words.
First reaction : Calm but tense. Rage simmering just beneath the surface. He wants to destroy your ex, but always careful to focus on your feelings first. He listens patiently and then makes sure you know your worth. He doesn’t go straight for anger — but oh boy if he hears your ex’s name again...
Anger level : Definitely at the highest level possible, and it shows. You hear him mutter, “If I see that asshole, I’m knocking teeth out.”
How he comforts you: He’s mature and knows you need someone to listen and hold space. He’s calm but fierce inside, prioritizing your feelings first. He listens deeply, asking gentle questions to make sure you feel heard. Stays on the phone all night, even if you fall asleep crying.
“You’re not alone. I’m not going anywhere.”
Extra: Will absolutely write a diss track in his studio later that night — not for public release, but therapeutic rage.
Yunho
How he finds out: You text him — short, broken sentences hinting at something wrong. Immediately worried, texts back with care, and asks if he can come over or call. When you confirm, he gets there ASAP.
When he sees you, your face tells everything. He's silent, and then his jaw clenches.
“Who do I need to kill?” — half-joking, but not really.
First reaction : Hot-blooded, but reels it in fast. He’s immediately pissed and ready to confront your ex verbally or physically.
Anger level: Wants to fight. Probably punches a pillow or storms around when you’re not looking.
“If he ever comes near you again, I’m not holding back.”
How he comforts you: Huge bear hugs, rubs your back gently. He keeps you laughing in between tears, and distracts you in healthy ways. But his protective vibe never leaves. He’d slap that jerk if he had the chance.
“I’ll always be here. You know that, right?”
Yeosang
How he finds out: Notices a change in your mood when hanging out, you seem distant and quiet.
First reaction: Sharp silence. He stares at you, trying to read every micro-expression. Quiet and observant, asks if something’s wrong softly. When you break down, He’s shocked but hides it to stay strong for you. Then he pulls you into a "akward" hug.
Anger level : Emotionally reserved, but deeply caring. He doesn't show it, but he's seething.
How he comforts you: Brings comfort food and makes you binge-watch dramas. He listens, but doesn’t force you to talk.
“You deserve better. So much better.”
Extra: Sends your ex a long, cold message later. No cursing — just surgical savagery.
San
How he finds out: You cancel on a hangout last minute — very unlike you. He drops by and finds you crying on your bed.
“Who did this to you?” — he’s pissed instantly, and it shows.
First reaction: Clenches jaws, ready to fight at 200 %. “What ? He cheated on you?” But he sees your tears not stopping, he drops everything and hugs you tightly.
“You’re way too good for someone like that.”
Anger level : Might actually go confront the guy. Someone stop him: He wants to throw hands !
“I swear, if I see that guy, he’s gonna regret it.”
How he comforts you: Holds you like you’ll break and whispers things like, “He didn’t deserve you. Never did.” Paces the room like a lion until you calm down. He reminds you how amazing you are and that you didn't deserve someone like your ex.
Extra: Might cry with you. Emotionally intuitive. Makes you feel like you’re not broken — just healing.
Mingi
How he finds out: You randomly say “They cheated on me,” mid-conversation like it’s nothing — because you’ve been bottling it up.
First reaction: Mingi freezes. Then he gets up and starts pacing, hands in his hair, visibly frustrated.
“What an asshole !!”
Anger level : Torn. Shocked and angry, but tries to laugh with you to ease the pain. Wants to scream but can’t stand seeing you cry, so he hugs you instead.
How he comforts you: Emotional teddy bear mode activated. Long hugs, crying with you, giving big warm speeches about how you’re worth so much more.
“They just dosen't deserve you, they don't deserve your tears, you're so amazing”
Extra: Will accidentally send an “I hope you step on Legos forever” message to your ex. Doesn’t regret it.
Wooyoung
How he finds out: You text him asking : “Are you free? I need you.” That’s all it takes — he knows something’s wrong. Comes ASAP and when he see you, immediately notices your red eyes.
“Wait. What happened? Are you crying?”
First reaction: Goes from 0 to 100. Gets hot-headed immediately — fires off 200 insults about your ex before even hearing the full story. Is very vocal about how terrible your partner is. Wants to call them out or at least rant with you. Then holds your hand and softens.
“You didn’t deserve that. I hate seeing you like this.”
Anger level: Ready to ruin your ex’s life. Will barely restrains himself.
How he comforts you: Throws his arms around you, does everything to make you laugh. Would 1000% pull up with a full PowerPoint on why your ex is trash and you’re a goddess.
Extra: Starts a full “delete your ex from the planet” montage with you — deleting pics, blocking them, affirming your worth the whole time.
Jongho
How he finds out: You’re out grabbing coffee and he notices you're not eating, barely smiling. He gets it out of you.
First reaction: Lips pressed into a thin line. “He cheated on you?” He’s calm, but scary calm — his silence is heavy.
Anger level: Lowkey threatening. If he sees your ex, he might not throw a punch, but he’ll make sure the guy feels two inches tall.
“Tell me his name. I just want to talk…” (He doesn't just want to talk.)
How he comforts you: Keeps his arm around your shoulders the whole time. Brings your favorite snack without saying a word.
“You're stronger than this. But you don’t have to be right now.”
· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·
🌙 let me know which reaction hit you the hardest 🥲 or which member you’d want comforting you IRL…
💬 reblogs + comments always mean a lot <3
✨ requests are open if you want more scenarios like this!
And i wish you all a very nice day 🫶🥰
#ateez#ateez headcanons#atiny#ateez reactions#ateez ot8#kim hongjoong#park seongwha#jeong yunho#kang yeosang#choi san#song mingi#jung wooyoung#choi jongho#hongjoong#seonghwa#yunho#yeosang#san#mingi#wooyoung#jongho#ateez hongjoong#ateez seonghwa#ateez yunho#ateez yeosang#ateez san#ateez mingi#ateez wooyoung#ateez jongho#dlb08reactions
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wildflower | leah williamson
based on my interpretation of the song by billie
just as a heads up before people start for the sake of the plot we are going to PRETEND lia and leah were a thing. I KNOW that they may not of ever been a thing but it’s just fiction ok, no way am i trying to ship them or anything like that! thanks and enjoy she’s a long one xox
warnings?: breaking of girl code, suggestions of smut, swear words, just sadness and if you squint some fluff. probs some others small things i’ve missed..

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"it's going to get better lia, i promise" you whispered as you comforted your best friend, lying in her bed your arms wrapped around her as she cried her heart out to you. her emotions were all still pretty raw, the reality of her recent breakup really hitting her all at once.
lia had been with leah williamson for just over a year, but things fell apart and even though they both did the same job, time broke both their hearts. with one being in england and other being somewhere else in the world wasn't ideal for either.
you hadn't seen much of lia and leah's relationship considering you didn't see either of them everyday due to you playing for the west side of london, chelsea.
but you knew that she was lia's girl and she had showed her the world. you had heard about all the cute things they would do before things fell apart, how lia would talk about the blonde and overall how in love lia was with her.
so seeing them fall out of love was hard, you felt for your best friend. seeing her so upset was breaking your own heart. knowing there was nothing you could do except let her cry on your shoulder and comfort her when she needed it most.
"i miss her so much, y/n" lia sniffled her voice croaky and hash from crying as her eyes were red and puffy, a pout forming on your face as you nodded along to her rant as you hand rubbed up and down her back slowly letting her get it out instead of bottling up which you knew she'd been doing for the past few days.
"i know lia and that's totally normal, but you deserve better and i know you know that" you sighed softly moving a strand of her hair from her face, as she nodded slightly. lia knew you were right but hearing it aloud made it real and she didn't know if she was ready to hear that just yet.
it had been a few days since you were sat in lia's apartment comforting her and lia was getting ready to go back to switzerland in a couple days time to see her family before her summer holiday and lia had assigned you the task of going to get her things from leah's. the swiss saying she needed to pack a few things out of the things she'd left there.
so pulling up to the blondes apartment on a random wednesday in june you prayed she was home, totally forgetting to maybe send a message to ask if you could come and collect your best friends things.
three knocks and a few minutes passed and the blonde was stood in front of you, hair a little messy as she was dressed in joggers and blue hoodie. her eyes a little red and puffy which was more than likely a sign the breakup had also hit her too.
"um hi" you smiled awkwardly not really knowing how to greet the blonde, you knew leah to a point but you wouldn't say you were friends more just friend of a friend? or in simpler terms you knew of the british captain through lia — only ever having the odd conversation if you'd been with lia when leah was there.
leah raised her eyebrows looking shocked at the sight of you standing at her front door. "hey, not to be rude but why are you here- did lia not-" leah began the door still only open a little bit as she leaned against it.
"oh sorry, i should have message just lia said some of her things are still here and asked if i could get them?" you cleared up the small misunderstanding as leah hummed stepping aside from leaning against the door so you could go into her apartment.
"you might have to give me a few minutes to find all of her stuff" leah gave you a small smile as you nodded taking in your surroundings.
the photos of leah and her family in photo frames on the coffee table as well as the walls, some of baby leah and who you were guessing to be her younger brother and other of leah from the past few months. the colours around the apartment being very neutral which matched the blonde personality.
smiling to yourself at the sight of some of the small tributes to arsenal which decorated the girls home, leah having been a die hard arsenal fan it would be surprising if she didn't have arsenal related memorabilia in her home.
"yeah sorry about that i should have give you the heads up" you apologised as leah waved off your attempts with the same small smile.
"no worries, erm you can sit down you know" leah pointed out as you were kind of just hovering in her living room area.
"right, yeah- sorry" you mumbled out as unknown to you leah rolled her eyes playfully at your excessive apologies. sitting down on the couch, sinking into the softness of it as leah called out that she wouldn't be long as you hummed response while getting your phone out to message lia letting her know that you wouldn't be long.
you ended up just scrolling aimlessly through your phone, your own little bubble consuming you to the point where you didn't even realise leah was back in the living room or the fact she was even talking to you.
"y/n!" her voice echoed throughout the apartment as you jumped a little at the sudden loud noise, looking up slowly from your phone. seeing the blonde stood in front of you with a brown cardboard box in her hands.
"is that it all?" you questioned looking at the box which actually appeared to be quite full, as the blonde nodded a small sniffle coming from her as you frowned slightly.
"are you gonna be okay?" you asked softly not wanting her to think you were overstepping but leah put the box down on the coffee table as she moved to sit next to you on her couch.
"yeah.. no- i don't know" her milton keynes accent was coming through thick as she sighed, you looked to her a sympathetic look on your face.
you knew this must be hard for her too, you knew she loved lia. "i know we aren't really friends but i'm here if you need someone to talk to" you pointed out, your hand resting on her knee.
"thanks y/n, i really appreciate that" she smiled, and for the first time since you arrived it looked genuine as her eyes then moved to where your hand was rested on her knee.
following her eye line before quickly snatching your hand away from her knee, "sorry, i- i didn't mean to make-" you quickly rambled out but you quickly noticed that leah still had the same smile on her face.
"it's okay, relax." you breathed out, your heart beating a lot slower than it was seconds ago as you moved to stand up.
"well i better get these back to their owner!" you picked up the box from the coffee table as leah also got up leading you to the door, opening it for you.
"thanks leah, i'll see you around!" you gave a small wave with your hand before catching the box again before you dropped it.
a light giggle coming from leah. "bye!" as you walked down the corridor towards the lift.
since being at leah's that day, you had found yourself around the blonde captain a lot more than you liked to admit out loud. although with lia being away it gave you someone to hang out with, is what you were telling yourself.
you were stood in her kitchen making both you and leah some food, you being left in charge after finding out leah couldn't cook to save her own life and actually being quite hungry yourself you figured if you wanted something decent it was best to do it yourself.
leah was of course still in close proximity, doing her best to distract you. "did you know that strawberries are not actually a berry!" she told you, this was the seventh random fact she had given you.
"how do you know that?" you asked lifting your eyes from cutting the vegetables that were set on the kitchen counter majority for you as leah's tastebuds weren't as adventurous when it came to food as you had discovered.
leah shrugged she didn't really know it, cause she didn't even know if it was true. she felt it was though she can vague remember seeing it online or maybe someone told her about it. she remembers something being mentioned somewhere about strawberries and berry's!
"that's so stupid! where do you keep your bowls?” you asked as you stood in the center of her kitchen. leah being leah though couldn’t verbally tell you she instead wrapped her arms around you waist while walking you over to where the bowls were kept.
“there in that one” leah pointed out to one of the many lower cupboard which the bowls were in. “you could have just told me you know!” you laughed out loud at the blonde’s silliness.
“where’s the fun in that though!”
moving without thinking, as you bent down forgetting about leah’s hands which were snaked around your waist you felt your bum be pressed flush against the blondes front. unbeknownst to you leah was trying her best not to whine for you.
picking up the bowl size you needed and placing back on the counter as you stood back up, as you turned to face the blonde, being met with a small sheepish smile. "hi"
"hi" she breathed out her face inches away from touching yours. the blonde looking into eyes deciding if she was going to make the move or if she was waiting for you to, seconds later bringing her hand up to your face, cupping your cheek and using her thumb to run across your cheekbones, pulling you that little bit closer to her.
allowing leah to pull you closer, only stopping when your faces were mere inches away. leah's hand remaining in its place. taking in being able to feel your soft skin under her finger tips as your back was pressed against the cold counter top of her kitchen.
if you moved even the slightest your lips would graze, you both being so close to each other you could feel your breath mixing together.
"please" you whimpered, at first you weren't sure what you were begging for but you were unable to stop the tone. "what?" leah innocently asked as a smirk appeared on her face as you rolled your eyes.
you could feel leah's lips graze yours as you moved that little bit closer, your lips now ever so slightly touching.
"le kiss me-" you breathed out, leah nodding and moving her head forward allowing your lips to connect properly.
your hand resting on the blondes hip, pinching it slightly as the blonde let out a small moan, getting the sound that you wanted to hear more and more.
leah ran her hand that was previously on your cheek to the back of your neck, "i love you" leah moaned into the kiss, the suddenness of her words shocking your body’s . that was the first time she had said that out loud. your head quickly telling you that you shouldn't be kissing her.
"le, we can't." you whispered as you pushed her away, your breathing slightly hitched as your mind replayed the three words she had just said seconds ago.
awkwardness filling your kitchen as guilt began to consume you. that was your best friends ex. were you crossing a line?
"why?" leah was confused and hurt. you asked her to kiss her now you were backpedaling.
"cause you've just gotten out of a relationship" you said simply as if it was the most obvious answer you could have given her.
"that can't happen again, it was a mistake" you regretted it as soon as you said it. deep down you knew you didn't mean it. but your head was telling you different, you did mean it and it wouldn't happen again. it couldn't.
but it did.
after the first kiss, it wasn't the last. you had spaced yourself away from leah but you felt this attachment to her something always drew you back to her, it was strange but you didn't do anything to try and stop it. you craved her.
but after each time, when you were lying awake alone in your own bed sheets you felt guilt, you knew you shouldn't and it lingered in the back of your mind. like a fever. like you were burning in hell. like a sign.
your friendship with lia was important to you, after all when you first moved just a little over five years ago she was the only person you knew, she's been there since the start. but when you were with leah, you were a different person. you were happy and free, you felt safe around her.
the thought of lia's reaction was what was eating you alive at nights. what would she think, would she still be your friend, what if she didn't even care, what if she already knew, what if she hated you for it.
the what ifs haunted you at night when you tried to sleep.
you knew you should just put it all behind you, that maybe you should break things off with leah cause after all nothing good ever last forever.
but you couldn’t, you didn’t want to.
cause at the end of the day you still somehow found your self with the blonde brit, hands intertwined and body's pushed close together.
like tonight where you were wrapped in your bed sheets, as leah watched how your top brow crinkled as you focused on the film. a small fuzzy feeling growing inside of leah, her heart beating that little bit faster.
leah had grown bored of the film within the first few minutes instead using the time to just make the most of the time with you, your fingers intertwined as she occasionally placed kisses on your cheek.
before moving to your chin, and your jawline and then lower to your neck whispering sweet nothing in your ear as she did. you thanked that the lights were off otherwise leah would have seen how your cheeks turned bright red when she kissed a certain spot on your neck.
the kissed soon turned into small bites a long with her sucking on a your sweet spot, your hips bucking slightly along with your eyes fluttering close from time to time as you withheld the urge to moan and give into her teasing.
her lips soft and everything you remember from the last time. how she knew your body, how to rile you up so fast.
but then you remember your best friend, lia. the guilt pending in your stomach as you were kissing the girl who broke your best friends heart. you were crossing a line.
"le stop-" you mumbled out against her lips, pushing her away from you. as she frowned at you, her brows knitted together.
"if lia find out- i- she'll" you stumbled over your words not being able to find the words as leah rested her hands on your hips a sharp sigh coming from her lips as you couldn't look up from the ground, to face her loving eyes.
"love, you need to stop worrying about lia- she's- it's stopping you from being happy" leah whispered, maybe she was right but you can't loose your best friend over a relationship. but could you loose a potential relationship over a friend?
but lia was your best friend, she helped you when you moved from your home town to london. she was there for you when you missed your family, she was the one that dropped everything for you when you needed help finding yourself again. lia was always there.
"we can't though- i can't." you stutter out. "why though, can't you see that i love you" leah said her voice getting softer as she kept you close to her.
"no. l-leah this is wrong, i can't do this anymore, not to lia. she comes back in two days-“ your head was spiralling, you weren't sure what had switched in your head so quick as there was so much going on inside your head but also nothing at all.
"you can't always help who you fall for"
"but i was the one who fucking sat with her when you call things off with her, told her it would be alright while she cried to me that she missed you, she my fucking best friend leah!" your voice had risen a little but you weren't shouting. your tone was sharp as you pushed her hands off your waist which took leah by surprise but she knew the guilt you felt about getting with her.
"then why am i stood in your apartment" leah pointed out as she watched you look up at her slowly shrugging her shoulders, leah's face blank filled with no emotion.
"i- i" you whispered you tried but you couldn't find a reason why, you could feel your lip trembling your eyes filling with tears. the realisation of what you were doing hitting you like a brick.
your hands covering your face as your breathing felt heavy. you felt stuck, not only in place but mentally too. your feelings for leah were beginning to feel more real, maybe you did love her but your friendship with lia was also very important to you and something you valued.
you felt like a wildflower. instead of being left to grow and stem out you had to be picked by someone.
you felt leah sit down next to you, part of you was hoping she was gonna leave but you knew in her heart that she cared for you deeply and to leave you when your head was clearly not in the right place would be wrong, even if you were hurting leah in the process.
"breathe y/n" she spoke softly her hand rubbing up and down your bare arm as your breathing was beginning to slow.
"m'sorry le" you mumbled your voice corse as tears still rolled down your face as the blonde pulled you into a side hug, as she tucked your hair behind your ears.
minutes passed as you sat in silence waiting for the other one to break the silence.
"i'm not gonna act as if it doesn't hurt but i get your in a hard place when im your best friends ex, and i know i don't have to remind you that i love you cause i know you. and i know i act as if it doesn't hurt when you push me away cause i know you don't mean it but, but it does y/n. i want nothing more than to be able to call you mine, show you off to everyone cause i see myself spending the rest of my life with you." leah confessed, and if your heart didn't already feel heavy enough it did now.
being totally wrapped up in the way lia may feel, you had neglected leah's feelings. selfishly not thinking how much it may be affecting leah.
"i'm sorry, leah i really am i just need time" you spoke finally from your heart, feeling leah nod against you as she began to move from your couch. kissing the top of your head as she walked out of your apartment, the door clicking shut as you felt your body sink into your couch.
it had been a few weeks since you spoke to her, lia was back and you had seen her a few times talking over a coffee as she told you all about switzerland and her holiday before asking what you had been up to in the month she’d been away, not being able to bring yourself to tell her about a certain blonde. you lied, telling her ‘not a lot.’
but for you the few weeks had been a good insight for you to reflect on your feelings and come to terms with what they actually meant. to the point where you knew exactly what you had to do.
the blonde over the past few weeks had sent you a few messages asking how you were to which you replied with a simple one word answer.
the blonde taking the hint at your bluntness that you still needed time and space so the messages had stopped, so when she heard knocking on her door, you were the last person she expected to be stood at the other side of her door.
"y/n?" leah looked at you with confusion, her eyes flicking to the flowers she guessing you had picked yourself as they were wrapped in a piece of newspaper.
"i love you."
#woso community#leah williamson x reader#leah williamson#woso#woso x reader#woso imagine#woso blurbs#arsenal women#awfc#arsenal wfc#awfc imagine#lia walti x reader#lia walti#england wnt#england women#england#enwoso
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Second Place – Part 4
He let her go. Now she’s carrying what he left behind.
TW: Emotional neglect, pregnancy, medical trauma, disability
⸻
You didn’t want to tell him.
Not really.
Not because it was a secret—but because it felt cruel. Like offering him a chance to show up again, knowing he probably wouldn’t. Like reopening a door just to watch him walk away one more time.
But this wasn’t about you anymore.
It was about the tiny heartbeat you’d heard three days ago on the monitor.
Small. Steady. Real.
It deserved truth. Even if he didn’t.
⸻
You didn’t call.
You wrote.
Not a long message. Not something emotional or poetic. Just facts. Clean. Sharp. Unavoidable.
You sat at your tiny kitchen table with a heating pad on your spine, hands trembling, and typed:
Charles,
I didn’t want to reach out. I meant it when I walked away. But you deserve to know.
I’m pregnant. Six weeks. It’s yours.
I’m not reaching out for help. I don’t expect anything. But this child deserves truth.
That’s all.
– Y/N
You hit send.
Then turned your phone off.
⸻
He didn’t respond right away.
Not in an hour. Not that night.
You told yourself that was fine. Expected.
Still, your chest clenched every time you rolled past the counter where your phone usually sat.
You busied yourself the next day with your therapy session. You hated it. Hated the way the nurse had to lift your legs into place. Hated the way you couldn’t feel her hands on your calves. Hated the word “progress” when you hadn’t taken a step in weeks.
You got home exhausted. Bitter.
And then your phone buzzed.
Charles:
Tell me where you are.
Please.
You stared at it for a long time. Not because you didn’t know what to say—but because your hands wouldn’t stop shaking.
You typed:
I’m fine.
You don’t need to come.
His reply came fast.
I do. Just once. Please.
You almost said no.
But some stubborn, hollow piece of you wanted him to see what he’d done. To sit across from you and face it—all of it. The broken body. The silence. The child. The future he walked away from.
So you sent the address.
⸻
He came the next morning.
You knew it was him by the sound of his car. That same hum that used to comfort you when he came home late. Now it felt foreign.
The knock was soft.
You took your time rolling to the door. Opened it slow. Looked up at him from the chair.
His eyes dropped instantly. To your lap. To the wheels. To the brace.
And then—up again, to your face.
“Hi,” you said. Voice flat. Tired.
He looked like he’d aged ten years in two weeks. Hollow eyes. Pale skin.
Like maybe this broke him, too.
“Hi,” he whispered. “Can I come in?”
You rolled back without answering.
He stepped inside the tiny space and looked around like he didn’t know where to stand. Like the air was thinner here.
“I didn’t know,” he said finally. “About the accident. Not really. I—I thought you were healing. I didn’t know it was—this.”
You gave a short laugh. “You didn’t ask.”
Silence.
He nodded slowly, lips pressing into a thin line.
You rolled into the kitchen, picked up the ultrasound picture from the counter, and held it out. He took it carefully, like it might crumble in his hands.
“This is ours?” he asked softly.
You didn’t answer. You didn’t need to.
His fingers trembled.
“I’m not here to beg,” you said. “Or to fix anything. I just wanted you to know before the rest of the world does. Before my body changes. Before I vanish completely.”
He looked up, something in his face cracking. “You never vanished. I—I just stopped looking.”
You stared at him, eyes wet but unflinching. “You stopped seeing. That’s worse.”
He stepped forward, like he wanted to touch you—but stopped. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Then don’t do anything,” you said, voice quieter now. “Just don’t lie. Don’t promise what you can’t give.”
He swallowed hard. “Can I be here for the baby?”
“I don’t know,” you said honestly. “You weren’t there for me.”
He looked like that gutted him. But you didn’t take it back.
You rolled toward the door, opened it again. The cool air hit your skin.
“I need time, Charles. Alone. For me. For them.” Your hand settled unconsciously on your stomach.
He stepped into the doorway, eyes red now. “I’ll wait.”
You looked up at him one last time. The boy you once loved. The man who couldn’t love you right.
“I’m not asking you to.”
And then you closed the door.
#f1#formula 1#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc x yn#charles lecrelc#charles leclerc fanart#charles leclerc blurb#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc#charles leclerc sad fic#charles leclerc x sad#charles lechair#charles leclerc angst#f1 x driver!reader#f1 x female reader#f1 x oc#f1 fandom
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dry humping a teddy while missing ur baby :(
members: hyung line x fem reader
requested? yes
trigger warnings: degrading words, swearing, mention punishment, sending nudes/ semi phone sex? being watched by them. yea! lmk if i missed anything!!
heeseung walked in from work, walking through the oddly quiet home as he tried to locate you. “baby? i’m home” he called out. usually, you’d come running towards him and greet him but this time, he was met with silence. he made his way to your shared bedroom, figuring that’s where you’d be. the door was cracked open as small whines and whimpers could barely be heard from outside the door.
he pushed the door further open, snickering at the sight. he stood at the door for a moment, watching you desperately hump the teddy he had recently bought you for your anniversary. you squeaked in embarrassment when you noticed him standing there.
“keep going baby, you seemed to be enjoying it.” he said, his voice dropping low as he stepped into the bedroom, watching as your cheeks heated up. “come on slut, you were just moaning out for me.”
*******************************************************
his phone buzzed against his thigh as he pulled it out of his pocket with a soft hum. jay looked down at a message from you, opening it carelessly. his cheeks instantly flared into a bright pink, locking his phone and hiding it from anybody that may have seen. he was quite exposed too, having been out with the members for dinner. you had sent him a video of you riding one of your plushies, moaning out for him.
he groaned as his pants tightened around his crotch. he stood up, wordlessly walking towards the bathroom as he face timed you, cursing under his breath as he locked himself inside the disabled bathroom. “pick up, fucking bitch.” he muttered to himself. you picked up not soon after, your cheeks flushed.
“i’m coming home soon. until then, you better enjoy what you’re doing when i can assure you, when i get home, you’ll be begging for forgiveness.” jay rasped, hanging up before you had the chance to respond.
*******************************************************
jake was asleep, his back turned to you, who had been desperately humping a teddy you usually slept with. you had woken up so horny but couldn’t find it in you to wake up your pretty boyfriend. so you resorted pathetically rubbing your little clothed cunt against your teddy in an attempt to release some sexual frustration.
as you felt your stomach beginning to tighten, your whimpers grew louder until you were shamelessly moaning, as your panties grew damp with your release. jake stirred from his sleep, lifting his head to turn around and look at you sleepily.
he groaned out, instantly figuring out what you had been doing. he reached over in his dazed state, placing his hands on your hips. “baby. come here, do that on me instead” he said, tugging you ontop of him.
*******************************************************
sunghoon walked into your bedroom, smirking as he plopped down on your bed that you had been in a slumber on. he placed his hand in your shoulder, gently shaking you to wake you up. “sweetie, i bought you something” he said softly, waiting for your eyes to open before waving a teddy infront of you.
you sat up, excited. he chuckled at your reaction, gently running his hands over the sides of your head before stopping to hold your face in his hands gently. “i think i deserve something too, no?” he said innocently, looking down at your body shamelessly.
you blushed, noticing the change in his demeanour. “you know what i want, right?” he asked, considering he made you do this with almost all of the stuffed toys he bought for you. “come on pretty baby, show me how thankful you are..”
RAHHH OK DONE!!!! feedback and reblogs are highly appreciated too!!
#enhypen smut#enha smut#enhypen x reader#heeseung smut#jake smut#jay smut#sunghoon smut#heeseung x reader#jay x reader#jake x reader#sunghoon x reader#kpop smut#kpop
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𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐨𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐞𝐧
Please do not translate or publish my works without my permission.
If you want to support me and read my other works that won't be on Tumblr, you can always do it on my Boosty~
Fandom: Genshin Impact
Pairings: Ayato, Kaeya, Thoma, Neuvillete, Tartaglia x fem!reader
Warnings: NSFW, modern AU, established relationships, intimate photos, masturbation.
▶• ılıılıılıılıılıılı. P1Harmony - Do It Like This
Note: English is not my native language, so I apologize if there are errors in the text qq
Hey! I think you all miss the dick pic. Although no one asked me to do this, but you don't need to ask me even once to bring you something to eat! Enjoy your meal ( ˘▽˘)っ♨
✦ Ayato

You'll have to try very hard, having endured all the cunning tricks of this man, in order to get a response photo from him immediately after he asks you to do your own.
Initially, it sounded like another joke, very typical for Ayato, but he was very surprised when you took it for a real request, pleasing the man with your piquant photo at perhaps not the most appropriate moment when he was at an important meeting. Fortunately for him, Ayato has enough self-control not to show how aroused he was by the image of your seductive body in front of strangers, but unfortunately for you, he just couldn't resist taking advantage of this opportunity.
It's always fun to play on your guilt, but when adding to your favorite collection of photos is at stake, a special excitement wakes up in Ayato. Of course, although you continue to play along with your lover from time to time, you yourself begin to get a taste. How much longer will he last, continuing to read your dirty messages and looking at the new photos that you took for him, before he snaps and just leaves work only to come home and fuck you to a state in which you'll not be able to not only type, but even pronounce his name? Ayato knows perfectly well what you are doing, so he staunchly withstands your attacks, believing that you yourself don't realize what you have just signed up for.
When he gets home, you better immediately wait for him on your knees without extra clothes, hoping that this will at least smooth out your future punishment a little, because if you think that Ayato will let you cum as fast as you want, then you're damn wrong.
As for his photo for you… Perhaps you still don't deserve to get them enough, but he'll definitely choose the most unfortunate moment for you to put you in an awkward position when one day a charming and insanely seductive photo of his naked body and an excited dick appears in your dialogue, to which you'll not have access. Next time you'll think twice before playing along with this scheming man, but isn't that why you fell in love with him?
✦ Kaeya

art by @cheng25598
Kaeya doesn't even know what would be better, to discourage you with his unexpectedly racy photo or to start by forcing you to do it? But he's so carefree and lazy that he doesn't think long before just sending you a photo of his horny cock while he's dying of boredom waiting for you at home on his day off. Of course, he doesn't care at all that you at work and how, perhaps, all the colleagues around you heard your surprised squeak when you opened a dialogue with your lover.
This is the first time Kaeya has decided to have fun with something like this, expecting you to be embarrassed for sure. It pisses you off that he's right, and your face is inevitably blushing now, while you, trying to look as non-suspicious as possible, run out of your office, hastily closing yourself in the bathroom.
[Y/N]: Wtf, Kaeya?! I'm at work!
[Kaeya]: I just missed you;)
His carelessness will drive you to your grave someday, but you bite your lower lip, suddenly meeting the reflection of your flushed face in the mirror. You'd be lying if you said you didn't want to be at home right now, punishing your annoying lover properly, which is so obvious from the way moisture begins to accumulate between your thighs, settling on the fabric of your underwear. There are still a few hours until the end of the working day, but you're so infuriated by the ease with which Kaeya manipulates you once again, involving you in his dishonest game when you nervously glance at the door, taking a photo in the mirror, as close as possible to the concept of «sexy» in such an environment.
You were about to put your phone in your pocket, sending your reply photo with the indifferent caption: «Glad for you. See ya in two hours», expecting it to calm him down for a while, but didn't even expect to instantly hear the notification sound.
[Kaeya]: I don't think a photo in underwear will be enough to compare to what I sent u:( Or are u afraid that one of your colleagues will see what we doing?
[Kaeya]: If I were wit u right now, you'd have to hide a lot more obscene things.
[Y/N]: Huh? Do u really think u'd make me undress in front of u in the bathroom at my job?
You really don't know how Kaeya do it, but for some reason you fall for his provocations every time, now feeling the heat that you can no longer ignore burning your lower abdomen more and more, while your eyes slide over the most obscene lines that you've ever read, even considering that what kind of person you decided to connect your life with.
But one thing is for sure — now Kaeya's goal is no longer to dispel his own boredom, but to make you cum in one of the cramped booths while he enjoys driving you crazy with his unsurpassed talent for eloquence, describing in detail how he would fuck you in each in the corner of a small bathroom.
Next time, perhaps Kaeya should pay you a personal visit.
✦ Thoma

art by @sonomi_rap5
Poor Thoma almost dropped out of his hands all the groceries that he decided to buy before returning home when he felt the vibration of the phone in his pocket, almost sure that this notification was from your message. You often write to him, knowing what time his working day ends, and asking him to grab something from the store, but this…
The confused man hastily turns away from all the people passing by, huddled in the corner of one of the shelves, when an attachment to your playful message appeared in front of his astonished green eyes, which said that you were looking forward to him at home. Is that new underwear?.. Thoma feels his cheeks flush with a bright blush, and his heart is pounding so wildly in his chest as he desperately tries to put aside all obscene thoughts. But this is hardly possible. You are so charming, adorable, divine in this photo, which he instantly saves before fixing his mesmerized gaze on him for a few more moments, feeling his cock harden and rest against his thigh.
«I'll be home soon!», — is the only message you get before Thoma disappears from the online, and you can't help but chuckle softly, imagining with what excitement and embarrassment he'll pay at the checkout.
As for him… Your gallery has been filled with his photos, perhaps not as soon as you would like. On the one hand, teasing a nice guy like Thoma is very funny, but on the other hand, you didn't want to embarrass him by luring him into your entertainment, which is not even the fact that he'll like it. But still, at some point you think that your relationship is strong enough not to collapse from one of your innocent… okay, obscene requests.
You'd like to see the look on Thoma's face when he saw the message with your dirty request. After a couple of minutes of silence, you were about to say that it was all just a joke, before you hear the notification sound, hurriedly grabbing your phone.
You have no idea where he hid to quickly take a cute photo for you, in which you can barely see anything because of the darkness in the room that Thoma chose for the photo shoot, but it's so charming that such a modest guy like him went to such obscenities for you, even at the risk to be noticed at your own work.
Thoma gets incredibly nervous when he doesn't get an answer from you for a long time, but he frantically looks at the inscription that you are typing something. Oh, should he have taken a better photo, or was it just a joke that he took seriously? But all his doubts and worries fade into the background, giving way to even greater embarrassment than what Thoma experienced when he received such a piquant request from you, when you send him a photo in response, but this time without clothes. The accompanying message contains detailed descriptions of how much you miss him and that you can't cope with how you miss your beloved boyfriend next to you to quench your thirst to feel his cock from that cute photo that he sent you, inside yourself.
What are you doing with him?.. It should be illegal to corrupt such an innocent guy in this way, but Thoma is really happy that he got the most beautiful girl in the world who is able to make him commit follies, just like he is now locking the door of some dark storeroom in his office, unable to cope with the desire that has captured him body and mind.
He doesn't know why you like to embarrass him like that, but… maybe he's starting to like it.
✦ Neuvillette

It's not that Neuvillette didn't know how to use a phone at all, but let's be honest, this skill wasn't even necessary for him until the day you appeared in his life. Making the necessary calls and occasionally using banal SMS was all he was capable of, so using messengers was something new for him, which, of course, Neuvillette needed your help to figure out.
At first, both of you just exchanged innocent short messages, because, you knew, he couldn't often be distracted from his work due to an increased sense of responsibility, but one day a fleeting thought came to your bright head, which you managed to grasp and even decide that it would really be funny to just send Neuvillette your candid photo in the middle of the working day.
And really, what will he do about it?
Neuvillette is so sweet in his seriousness and responsible approach to literally everything in this world, which makes him a wonderful partner, but your hands have always itched so irrepressibly to throw something like that, knocking a stoically calm man out of his rut.
When you saw that Neuvillette had read the message, but had been silent for ten minutes, you almost thought that he had just decided to ignore your prank, but you had no idea what was really going on. After opening your message, Neuvillette just froze, not understanding what he should reply or do. It's the first time this has happened to him, and he's really discouraged.
The most respected and responsible judge doesn't say a word, just staring at his phone for ten minutes? This definitely doesn't go unnoticed. Although he is not particularly sociable, worried colleagues still wonder if everything is all right with him, finally bringing the poor confused Neuvillette out of his stupor. His head really had thoughts of consulting with someone on this topic, but he decides that this question is still too intimate to ask it to an insufficiently close person, so he has no choice but to solve this puzzle on his own and briefly unsubscribe to you that he'll be at home soon, before silently leaving the office.
To say that you were shocked to see Neuvillette on the doorstep of your shared house as soon as possible after receiving his message is to say nothing. But what struck you even more was when he hurriedly threw off his suit, with all the seriousness that only he is capable of, silently climbing onto your bed.
— Neuvi, what are you doing? Why aren't you at work? — you interrupt the man when he was about to throw off the rest of his clothes, before pausing, giving you a puzzled look.
— I got your photo.
— Yes… and?
— I thought you wanted to have sex, so I came home.
— Is that all?..
— Yes. Isn't that what you wanted? Why are you laughing?
p.s. After half an hour of an embarrassing but laugh-provoking conversation in which you explained to Neuvillette that couples sometimes exchange intimate photos while away from each other, it seems that the man finally realized for what purpose you committed such an uncharacteristic act for you.
Well… everyone learns from their mistakes. Next time, you might be lucky to see his inept first intimate photo if you tell him how to switch to the front camera before that.
✦ Tartaglia

art by @eriimyon
For both of you, sharing any photos when you are away from each other is quite common, but Childe was still the first to dilute your usual correspondence, accompanied by cute and funny photos of your dog and what you cooked for dinner, with something more piquant.
Your lover, without any hesitation, asked you to take a photo for him when, on another of his long business trips, he felt too lonely away from you, and didn't even think about what he might receive a refusal to his request. You can say that you are both on some kind of your common comfortable wave, so you are happy to approach the task set before you even with some degree of creativity, making a photo of your breasts covered with whipped cream for Childe.
«This could be your dessert after dinner;)», — Childe is both touched, excited and saddened by your funny photo caption. He would like to be next to you to enjoy such a tempting dessert, but all he can do is take a photo for you in return.
[Childe]: Unfortunately, i didn't have cream next to me, so this is all the dessert u can count on!
You would have laughed at his joke if the dick on his photo that Childe took for you didn't look even more attractive than any sweet thing you can imagine. This is the first time that you have to describe in words all the things that you would do with this amazing cock, but it also had its own charm.
Your correspondence eventually ended in a rather heated conversation on the phone, which also came to naught as soon as the degree of tension between the two of you was so high that the only thing coming from the speakers of your phones was only moans and heavy sighs, while you were already in complete disarray, too lost in your own obscene fantasies. Perhaps Childe has never in his life masturbated with such pleasure as to the sounds of your sweet voice, holding in his head that image of you that was captured in a racy photo taken especially for him, just as you have never experienced an orgasm from how damn sexy his muffled moans sound in the speaker of your phone.
Of course, this is still so insanely little, but since then you both have a new common entertainment that you can do on lonely evenings to get over the separation. On the other hand, you have seriously opened a real Pandora's Box, now putting the idea in Childe's head that he can tease you in this way, so be prepared for the fact that one day you will receive a dirty message from him or even just a photo at the most inopportune moment (although no one said that you can't return the favor).
p.s. if u know the author of the rest of the art, write me their nicknames in private messages, and i'll add them in the post, because I have been saving these arts for a long time ago and now cannot find their owners:(
#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact#genshin x you#genshin impact x you#ayato#ayato x reader#ayato x you#ayato smut#genshin smut#kaeya#kaeya x reader#kaeya x you#kaeya smut#thoma#thoma x reader#thoma x you#thoma smut#neuvillette#neuvillette x reader#neuvillette x you#neuvillette smut#childe#childe x reader#childe x you#childe smut#tartaglia#tartaglia x reader#tartaglia x you#tartaglia smut
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