#you're awesome nugget

[roosterforme]

Aim for the Sky Part 6 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: After you and Bradley make a mess and clean it up, your first wedding anniversary is in the books. There are so many changes going on, it's hard to keep track of everything. But some things seem like they will always stay the same, like the love you feel for him.

Warnings: Fluff, smut, cum play, food play, swearing, pregnancy

Length: 4100 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader

Aim for the Sky masterlist. This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots and other series, but it can be read on its own! Check my masterlist for the reading order.

The sound of the ocean and the twinkling of the stars in the night sky were the only things Bradley recognized in the dark besides your body. You were on his lap, rolling your hips slowly against him, teasing him with your warmth and your voice as your lips met his ear. 

"You're the best husband, and soon you'll be the best daddy. The Nugget and I decided we're going to keep you around."

Bradley groaned softly as he rubbed his palm along your belly. "Yeah, you ruined that for yourself as soon as you fed me. I'm not going anywhere. Ever."

You laughed softly before pulling your lips away from the side of his neck. "I forgot to ask. What's in the bakery box?"

"Huh?" he grunted in response as you pressed your soft thigh against his erection through his jeans. He thought he was supposed to know what you were talking about. It sounded familiar. A bakery box. But your hand was unzipping his pants now, and he was a lost cause.

"The bakery box, Roo," you whispered, voice laced with amusement. "On the backseat?"

"Oh," he sighed as you stroked him. He couldn't read your expression in the darkness, but he knew you must be smiling. "I got you a cake. A confetti cake for our anniversary."

"You did?" You sounded delighted as you added, "I want to see it."

Bradley let his head tip back against the side of the interior of the Bronco. You already pulled your hand back out of his pants and started crawling away from him. "Sweetheart," he whined. "I thought I was just about to get lucky."

He felt cold where your warmth had just been, and he let himself be annoyed for a few seconds until you softly squealed, "Ouch!"

"Shit, what happened?" he asked, realizing he wasn't sure exactly where you had crawled off to. He put one leg up to block the open tailgate while he dug around in his pocket next to his hard cock for his phone.

As soon as he turned on the flashlight, he realized you were already looking over the back of the seat, digging around under the blanket to find the cake. "I pinched my finger. I'm fine," you muttered. "Let me have your phone."

He handed it to you before he flopped down onto his back. You used the flashlight to locate the dome light as well, and soon that was shining directly into Bradley's eyes as he palmed himself for some relief. "Can't the cake wait until we get home?"

You turned and looked down at him over your shoulder with a little pout on your lips. "But I'm hungry again."

He would never deny you anything you wanted. As he got to his knees and scooted over next to you, he kissed your cheek. "Did you look at it yet?" Bradley reached down onto the seat and carefully opened the box to reveal the pretty, round cake with white icing and rainbow sprinkles. Then you started laughing. Apparently, in his horny state, he'd also forgotten what he had the baker write on it.

Happy First Anniversary. Thanks for marrying me and having awesome tits. I love you.

"Bradley!" you wheezed. "You made someone write that on a cake!"

He grabbed you up without putting too much pressure on your belly and said, "It's all true." He kissed down the side of your neck and back up to your ear as your laughter turned to a soft moan. "Now, can we turn off the lights and get back to where we left off?"

Your stomach growled so loudly as you met his eyes, it was almost comical. "I'm sorry, but I'm just really hungry, and I think Rose the Nugget is, too."

Bradley was absolute putty in your hands as soon as you used her name. He kissed you sweetly and whispered, "Then let me make sure my girls are well fed."

He guided you over the pavement in the darkness and got you buckled into the passenger seat. Then he opened the back door and said, "You know, I never ever let anyone else eat in the Bronco before you. I still don't even eat in here." He cut into the cake and put a slice on one of the paper plates he brought along. "But apparently I have no boundaries when it comes to my wife and my daughter."

When you turned around, he handed the piece of cake and a fork up to you, and you beamed back at him. "Thanks, Daddy."

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to get his body under control so he could drive home. He closed the back door and walked around the front of the Bronco. You were smiling and licking the frosting from the fork when he climbed in with his pants still unzipped. He was still almost painfully hard, and he was desperately praying there was still hope for some relief on the horizon.

Bradley drove carefully around the orange cones and out onto the road that ran along the main strip of Coronado. The indecent little sounds you were making had him jealous of the cake, and then you held out your fork to him. "This is so good. You need to try it."

"I told you I don't eat in the Bronco," he muttered before opening his mouth wide for you to feed it to him. "Holy hell. Gimme some more."

"Right?!" You fed him another bite and another one. By the time he was parking in the driveway, there was icing in his mustache, and he was still unbearably horny.

Bradley handed you the keys, kissed your lips so hard you gasped, and said, "Go unlock the front door." He watched you scamper up the walkway as he grabbed the bakery box from the backseat before following you inside. "Now get undressed," he said, giving you a firm smack on your ass that left you biting your lip as you looked at him. "I'm serious, Baby Girl. Take it all off and wait for me in the kitchen."

"He's so demanding," you said, either to yourself or to the baby, and regardless he laughed as he pretended to throw a treat out the back door so Tramp would go outside. Then he was right on you with the cake in his hands as you pulled your dress over your head and let it drop to the floor, leaving you in nothing but your little Mrs. Bradshaw panties. 

"Those are some awesome tits," he whispered, setting the cake down and running his hands up the soft swell of your belly and all the way up to stroke your nipples.

"You're obsessed right now," you told him. You weren't wrong. He was about to bring his lips down to play with you, but he narrowed his eyes and reached for the cake instead. "What are you doing?" you gasped as he dunked his fingers into the icing before spreading it all over your breasts.

"I'm still a little hungry, too," he murmured, tracing your nipples slowly with his messy fingertips until you were trying to grind yourself against him. He slipped his thigh between yours, and you moaned his name as he brought his lips down to taste the exquisite icing on your perfect skin. Everything was sweet and warm as he buried his face in there, licking and sucking on you until you were as far gone as he was.

With your arms around his neck and your pussy rubbing against him, you begged for it. "I need you to fuck me. Please!"

He couldn't say no to you on a regular day, but especially not on your anniversary. He spun you around, pulled your satin panties to the side and bent you over a little bit over the counter. He got his cock free, and with a snap of his hips, he thrust himself inside you, and he was rewarded with his name echoing off the kitchen walls.

"Feel good?" he grunted as he slipped one hand in the front of your panties and squeezed your gorgeous breasts with the other. 

"So good," you whispered as he rocked himself into you a little harder. 

He pressed his nose to the back of your neck and inhaled the smell of your skin and the icing which he got everywhere. "I thought we'd have slow and sexy anniversary sex. I didn't know I'd end up fucking you hard over the kitchen counter."

"Blame it on the cake," you whined, reaching for his hand which was on your tits and guiding his sticky fingers up to your lips. Bradley had no idea how he was still going. You'd had him wound up all night. And the way you were circling each digit with your tongue was so fucking hot.

When he pinched your clit, you bucked back against him. When he did it again, he soothed you with some slow circles, and he knew you were getting close. He could feel you starting to clench him a little tighter as your moaning got louder. You sucked on his fingers while your pussy treated his cock to your orgasm.

"God, you feel good," he gasped, fucking you through your highest peak. But he still had some left in the tank. You seemed to be a little surprised as you looked at him over your shoulder, and he was sure his eyes were wild and his face was red. 

You spun to look at him as he stared down at his hard cock, bobbing excitedly and glistening from your wetness. You took his chin in your hand and kissed him on the lips. "Is it my turn to have a little fun?"

Bradley nodded, because he didn't even care what you did right now, he knew he was going to love it. This time you were the one coating up your fingers with icing, and you jerked your hand up and down his length while he gripped the edge of the counter. Just the idea of the confection mixed with the flavor of your pussy had him bucking into your hand. "Let me taste it," he whimpered, and your bright eyes grew a little wider, but you brought your hand up to your own mouth first. "Please," he begged, watching you lick your palm.

"Oh my god," you gasped, eyes drifting closed as you dipped your index finger between your lips. 

"Please," he asked one more time, afraid he might just cum all over your body and the floor. You looked up at him and reached out to part his lips with your thumb, and then you carefully placed your index and middle fingers on his tongue. He sucked at the flavor and swiped his tongue between your fingers. He swallowed it down, convinced that this combination was one of the best things he had ever enjoyed in his life.

He cleaned off your whole hand as you watched in awe, and when you realized he was still hard, you used his help to get yourself kneeling on the floor in front of him. Bradley lasted exactly eight seconds with your tongue circling his cock while you licked at the icing and sucked on him. "Fuck!" he barked, tapping the back of your throat as he came. "Holy shit." Then you had the audacity to show him the mess he made on your tongue before you swallowed him down.

"You taste very good mixed with icing too, Roo."

Bradley was so fucking in love with you and everything you did. He would marry you a hundred times over just to get all of the sweet and filthy moments with you. "Why don't you get back up here and let me try it for myself?"

You were all too happy for him to help you to your feet so he could slip his tongue between your lips. You were absolutely right.

----------------------------

When you woke up on Sunday, you were a little sore. Bradley was still sound asleep, and he looked exhausted himself. The Nugget was rolling around on your bladder, and you had to quickly shimmy walk to the bathroom. Your husband did a bit of a number on you in the kitchen with the rough sex. 

You reached for the toilet paper and mumbled to yourself, "Maybe he was right. Maybe anniversary sex is supposed to be a little calmer?"

"Blame it on the cake, Sweetheart." You looked up as Bradley strolled into the bathroom completely naked. His cock even looked impressive when he was soft, and his hair was wild from the way you'd been running your fingers through it before you fell asleep last night. He grunted as he yawned. He was perfect to you.

"I can't believe we've been married for a year," you whispered as he leaned down to kiss your forehead as you sat on the toilet. This was probably peak domesticity right here, and it made you smile.

"How's my Nugget?" Bradley asked before kissing your forehead once more.

"Almost made me wet the bed," you told him as you stood up. "I slept very soundly last night, but she woke me up by thumping on my bladder."

His brown eyes lit up as he put his hands underneath your shirt. "Is she still thumping?" You knew immediately that he was able to feel her as a smile bloomed on his lips. "Hey, Rose. It's Daddy."

"So that's really her name? We're definitely going with that?"

"Mmhmm," he hummed, eyes closed as his palm circled your belly button. 

You kissed his cheek and then his temple. "Your excitement always makes me even more excited."

When he patted your belly again, he asked, "Are you going to brunch with Cam and Maria?"

"Yeah, but I don't need to be there for another hour. Do you want me to make you breakfast first?"

Relief filled his features as he turned on the sink and looked in the mirror. "Please. Then I'm going to try to finish up the playset. And don't forget Bradley Ross is coming over after work tomorrow." Bradley Ross. Bradley Ross. The name was familiar, but you couldn't place it. "The contractor? For the attic?"

"Oh! Yes, of course. Bradley Ross," you told him, having completely forgotten that your house was about to become a construction zone. "I hope he can finish it before my parents come out for Christmas."

"That's the goal," Bradley muttered as he looked at his hair. "We can throw them upstairs so I can do whatever I want to you in our room all night long. The separation will be key." You snorted as you started to get your toothbrush ready, and then he turned to you and said, "Nat commented on my gray hairs the other day."

He looked perhaps a little bit concerned. "Did she?" One thing you really appreciated about your husband's best friend was the way she picked on him. It was good for him to have a friend who gave him shit. It probably helped build character in him, similar to the way Cam usually gave you a hard time. But you wanted to make sure his feelings weren't hurt, especially not about his. "What did she say?"

He shrugged, trying for nonchalance. "That it's getting a little noticeable. At my temples."

"It's so fucking sexy," you told him, reaching up with your fingers and running them through his hair. "God, Roo. Women eat this shit up."

"They do?" he asked, perplexed.

"Oh, definitely," you promised. "A handsome man with some gray hairs? Jesus, I'm going to have to start keeping a closer eye on you when we go out to the bar."

Bradley rolled his eyes. "You'll have to do nothing of the sort."

"That's right," you whispered with a smile. "Your sexy hair belongs to me, Bradley."

He stood behind you while you brushed your teeth, and he kissed your neck. "I'm afraid you're stuck with all of this."

----------------------------

You were sitting in the kitchen after work on Monday, eating a sliced up apple that you were dipping into hot sauce while you talked to your parents over FaceTime.

"We could come out the Tuesday before Christmas," your mom said for the fourth time.

"I already told you, just let me know when you're coming, and we'll pick you up from the airport," you said, also for the fourth time.

Your dad was already in his pajamas since it was three hours later on the east coast, and you could tell your mom was annoying him as much as she was annoying you. "I sincerely hope you eat a real meal besides that," she said, looking at your snack in disgust.

You wanted to roll your eyes. You were about to call Bradley in from the backyard where he was throwing a tennis ball for Tramp so you could make him deal with her for a little bit. "I'll eat a real meal later, mom." Just then, there was a knock at the door and you hopped up. "Oops, that's probably the contractor. I'll talk to you later! Bye, love you!"

Saved by the distraction, you shouted out the back door for your husband to come in. And that's when you met Bradley Ross. He kind of reminded you of your own Bradley, just a little bit older. When the three of you ended up in the attic space, he looked around at it like it was the most beautiful diamond in the rough he'd ever seen, when in reality it looked like a disaster that your husband demolished. 

"Wow," he told you, measuring along each wall. "This is going to come together perfectly. What a beautiful space. I'm sure you'll cherish it."

"Right," your husband told the other Bradley while you tried not to laugh. "Look, having a cherished attic is great and all, but we just really need a space for my wife's parents when they come out to stay, especially after the baby is born."

"You'll have both," he promised.

Your husband rubbed lazy circles on your back as you wrote out a check for the deposit on the kitchen island and listened to Bradley Ross go over the detailed plans. Two more bedrooms and a full bathroom? Part of you couldn't believe there was enough room up there to accommodate all of that, but you would just have to trust this man's life changing vision.

You handed him the check and took his business card. "I'll be back on Wednesday to start the project," he said as you entered his number into your phone.

Once he was gone, you looked up at Bradley and said, "We should probably get a Christmas tree soon. And maybe some lights? I'm used to us going to my parents' house. We never decorated before."

He chuckled. "I haven't decorated for Christmas since my mom died, but if you want to, then I guess I'll get into the holiday spirit."

"You better get used to it," you informed him as he tugged you toward the bedroom across the hallway from yours which would become the nursery. "After Rose is born, you're going to need to go overboard with it."

"I love going overboard," he told you, as if you didn't already know that about him. "Speaking of which... all of the stuff we ordered on Friday got delivered today. Wanna take a look?"

You squealed with excitement as you saw that he had opened up the boxes and set everything on the floor in the empty room. "Roo! The crib bedding is adorable!" When you went to kneel on the floor, he insisted on helping you get down comfortably. That's when you opened the bedding and ran your hand over the pastel airplanes. The fabric was soft, and your eyes got a little misty as you imagined your baby snuggled up on them.

Bradley knelt down next to you and kissed your cheek. "I was thinking your dad and I could put the crib together when they come out in a few weeks? I know how much he likes working on little projects like that."

You threw yourself into his arms so quickly, he grunted in response. "He would love that, Bradley. He would absolutely love that." And now it was too late to try to get your hormones under control again as you started sobbing in his arms. 

He kissed your ear and whispered, "That will give me time to paint in here while you're out of the house. Maybe you and Nat can go see a movie and go shopping or something. I don't want the paint fumes to bother you since this room is so close to our bedroom."

"You're so fucking considerate." You hugged him tighter and straddled his legs, and soon he was on the floor underneath you as you both laughed. "Can we start calling it the nursery? Rosie's nursery?"

"That's music to my ears, Baby Girl. And you know what? I also kind of feel like picking out a Christmas tree now."

"Yeah?" you asked in excitement.

He nodded up at you and let his hand slip down to your belly. "Yeah. How about we go look at paint colors and trees? I want an enormous one that looks like it's covered in snow." He gave you a little shrug and said, "You know, since we're hardy east coast people."

"And we're having a hardy east coast baby."

The two of you ended up at Home Depot until they were closing. Bradley picked out an eight foot tall tree and string lights, and you decided to ask your parents to bring out some of their ornaments with them. You also had approximately fifty little paint samples in your hand while you watched Bradley awkwardly shove the tree into the back of your red Bronco.

"I'm leaning toward this lavender? Or maybe a light gray? Blue could be nice though, so it looks like the sky."

"Let's hang them up in Rosie the Nugget's nursery for a few days before we decide," he crooned as he buckled you in.

You already thought you might melt onto the floor as you ate a little snack while he drove home, and then you realized he would soon have someone else to buckle in. "Bradley," you mumbled around your granola bar. "I can't tell if I'm horny, emotional or just starving again, but the way I need you to install car seats in both Broncos while shirtless is absolutely essential to my wellbeing."

He chuckled and said, "I'm certain I can do that for you."

You crunched through the rest of your granola bar in contentment.

------------------------------

The month of December brought about a routine of sorts that Bradley was kind of in love with. You were just about to start your third trimester, and it seemed as though your belly was growing noticeably every day now. You came home from work so horny most days, the two of you ended up sneaking off to your locked bedroom for a quickie while Bradley Ross worked his magic upstairs. Then inevitably there was a more leisurely round of sex before bed where more time could be spent admiring your perfectly round belly and delicious tits. 

"Which day are your parents flying out again?" he asked you as he peeled your underwear slowly down your legs leaving your soaking wet pussy bare for him. 

"The twenty-first," you whimpered as he stroked you and kissed along your tattoo. "Can we talk about something besides my parents while you're down there?"

"Sure," he replied smoothly. "How about you tell me what you want for Christmas?"

"Roo," you whined as he licked your clit to your exact personal preference. "I want a million orgasms."

He smirked with your clit between his lips and said, "Already wrapped and under the tree for you. What else?"

Your hands tangled in his hair as he worked you up. You were babbling incoherently so he intentionally slowed his tongue, and you started to panic. "Everything I want is for the baby or the nursery! But maybe we can go on a little babymoon trip?" 

Your eyes were wild as you were looking at him over your belly, begging him to keep going. But honestly, your idea sounded pretty great, and he was going to look into it. "Anything you want, Sweetheart. You get to have it all." He proved it to you by letting you have one of the million orgasms early.

-----------------------------

Oof, these two are really enjoying her pregnancy hormones and her cravings. Up next we have a California Christmas with Roo's in-laws, and honestly so much more. Thanks for reading! As always, if there's something you'd like to see in this series, shoot me a message! Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 7

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[cutielando]

when two world collide | c.l.

social media au

synopsis: in which a singer and a formula 1 find solace withing each other

my masterlist

liked by landonorris, selenagomez and 13,284,576 others

📍Las Vegas, Nevada

yourinsta thank you so much for last night, Vegas!! you were an incredible crowd and i can't thank you enough for supporting me always. Europe, here I come !!!!

view all 4,385,294 comments

user1 OMG MOTHEEEEEER 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

selenagomez forever proud of you !! 💖💖

yourinsta thank you, love !! ❤️

landonorris great job, bugger!! give me a call when you can so we can meet

yourinsta thanks hahaha i will 🫶🏻

landonorris try not to forget this time

yourinsta it was ONE time lando 🙄

landonorris doesn't matter

user2 not lando shading y/n 😭😭

user3 she's outdone herself with this tour fr

user4 MOTHER

arthur_leclerc you were awesome! ❤️

yourinsta thank you arthur !!!

yourmother so proud of you, sweetheart! ❤️❤️❤️

yourinsta i love you mom !!!!! ❤️❤️

charles_leclerc great concert ! liked by yourinsta

georgerussell63 you actually made it, proud of you nugget 😇

yourinsta thanks georgie 🥹🥹

user5 george calling y/n nugget >>>>>

charles_leclerc started following yourinsta 5:19 P.M.

yourinsta started following charles_leclerc 6:01 P.M.

liked by carlossains55, yourinsta and 3,284,469 others

📍Las Vegas, Nevada

charles_leclerc Very special weekend for us, good pace and in the end a very good result. Thank you Vegas, you were a gem. See you next week! ❤️

view all 283,591 comments

scuderiaferrari ❤️❤️

joris_trouche amazing weekend, well done mate🙏🏻🙏🏻

charles_leclerc thanks mate 🙏🏻

yourinsta congratulations !!! you were great !!❤️

charles_leclerc thank you !!!!!❤️🙏🏻

user1 um, Y/N IN CHARLES' COMMENTS? WHAT????

user2 Y/N, what are you doing here girl 🤔🤔🤔

leclerc_pascale je suis fier de toi, mon ange!! (i am proud of you, my angel) ❤️❤️

charles_leclerc je t'aime, maman ❤️

carlossainz55 congrats, hermano. we both know why you performed so well this weekend 😏😏

charles_leclerc yes mate, the car had good pace. thanks

carlossainz55 whatever you say, hermano

charles_leclerc i'm telling the truth

arthur_leclerc no, you're not

joris_trouche arthur and carlos are right, just saying

charles_leclerc i'm blocking all of you 🙄

user3 carlos and arthur exposing charles 🥲🥲

user4 there are rumors that Charles has a crush on Y/N and she attended the race in Vegas

user5 really?

user4 yes, apparently she couldn't make it originally but then her schedule changed and apparently she was there

user5 oooh i see, that would explain why Charles pushed so hard the entire race

instagram dms

charles_leclerc

hey y/n. hope i'm not bothering you or anything

yourinsta

hey charlie. not at all, what's up?

charles_leclerc

i had a really good time last weekend in Vegas, you're amazing. i was wondering if you'd consider going out with me this weekend? so we could get to know each other better?

yourinsta

of course ! can't wait :)

charles_leclerc

great!! i'll text you all the details soon

liked by yourbff, charles_leclerc and 9,284,581 others

📍Lusail International Circuit, Qatar

yourinsta i'm starting to think red suits me best. thank you for having me, ferrari!!! ❤️ tagged: scuderiaferrari

view all 2,381,573 comments

scuderiaferrari always a pleasure to have you in our garage !! ❤️

user1 i'm starting to smell a Ferrari romance here

carlossainz55 thank you for supporting us this weekend!

yourinsta of course !

charles_leclerc you might have been my good luck charm 🤔

yourinsta always 😏

user2 UM EXCUSE YOU???????????????????

arthur_leclerc i was wondering where all that pace came from 😆😆

charles_leclerc shut up

yourinsta happy to be of help

francisca.cgomes we need to hang out again!!!!!💖💖

yourinsta we doo!!!! ❤️

selenagomez red really does look good on you 😏😏

yourinsta i know 😮‍💨

user2 i’m really starting to smell a new relationship here

yourbff i’m actually jealous 😭😭

yourinsta i promise i’ll bring you with me next time🫶🏻

user3 we're just waiting for an official launch at this point

user4 i wanna be her

user5 i wanna be charles, tbh. she's so gorgeous 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

landonorris i'm very hurt by this, y/n

yourinsta i'm so sorry, i promise i'll be with you at the next race

landonorris papaya is a much cooler color than red

charles_leclerc not true mate

landonorris get out of here, leclerc

yourinsta boys, behave

landonorris yes ma'am

charles_leclerc yes y/n

user6 the comment thread >>>>>>>>>

liked by yourinsta, joris_trouche and 3,283,173 others

charles_leclerc feeling lucky lately

view all 482,174 comments

yourinsta i work wonders, i know 😏

charles_leclerc you do

user1 UM HELLO?????????

landonorris you're torturing the poor fans

charles_leclerc i don't know what you're talking about

landonorris you're like little kids

yourinsta shut up

joris_trouche you really aren't that good at this

charles_leclerc i'm trying, okay?

scuderiaferrari we love seeing it! ❤️ liked by yourinsta and charles_leclerc

user1 ferrari is loving it

user2 he seems happy, ngl

user3 this couple is everything, he seems genuinely happy to be around her and vice versa

user4 she deserved to be happy, i love them 😭😭😭😭

arthur_leclerc not suspicious at all

joris_trouche that's what i'm saying

charles_leclerc stop attacking me

carlossainz55 now we all know why you've been doing so well

charles_leclerc are you shading me?

carlossainz55 i don't even know what that means

user5 carlos is so confused help 😭😭

liked by leclerc_pascale, yourbff and 12,184,376 others

yourinsta in my lover girl era ❤️ tagged: charles_leclerc

view all 5,284,689 comments

charles_leclerc you make me the happiest i've ever been

yourinsta i love you ❤️

landonorris finally, keeping this a secret has been tough

yourinsta thank you lil lando

landonorris take that back

yourinsta i won't

user1 LANDO KNEW???????

user2 PARENTS 😭😭

user3 GIRL, really, the vroom vroom guy? 😭😭😭😭 liked by yourinsta

yourinsta what can i say, he makes my heart race

charles_leclerc damn right

user3 charles 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

arianagrande so happy for you, my love!!!!!

yourinsta i love you !!!

scuderiaferrari we can't wait to see you in the paddock, y/n! ❤️

yourinsta i can't wait either!! ❤️❤️

landonorris ...

mclaren ...

yourinsta ...sorry guys...

landonorris the betrayal 😭

selenagomez i'm so glad you're happy!!!!

yourinsta thank you, honey !!❤️

charles_leclerc thanks !

user4 CHARLES AND SELENA KNOW EACH OTHER NOW??????

user5 selena's one of y/n's best friends, doesn't really surprise me

user4 i know, but it just seems so unrealistic, like 2 worlds colliding

user6 seeing her this happy makes me want to cry😭😭😭😭😭

leclerc_pascale thank you for keeping my boy happy ❤️

yourinsta je t'aime, maman !!! ❤️❤️❤️

user7 y/n and charles' mom, i can't-😭😭😭😭

liked by yourinsta, arthur_leclerc and 4,912,482 others

📍Monte Carlo, Monaco

charles_leclerc tu es l'amour de ma vie ❤️ (you are the love of my life) tagged: yourinsta

view all 928,174 comments

yourinsta you're going to make me cry 😭😭😭

yourinsta i love you so so much, charlie❤️❤️❤️❤️

charles_leclerc i love you more ❤️❤️

arthur_leclerc simp

yourinsta don't make fun of my bf

user1 ooooh, protective y/n sticking up for her man

landonorris he stole you from me :(

charles_leclerc i did no such thing

landonorris yes you did, she never has time to hang out with me anymore because she's always with you

yourinsta i promise to hang out with you soon lando

landonorris lies

user2 seeing lando being sad because y/n doesn't hang out with him is so precious 🥹🥹 their friendship is everything

user3 imagine living the dream of being y/n's bestie

user2 i'd kill to be in his shoes

user4 mother is mothering as usual

leclerc_pascale je vous aimez! ❤️ (i love you two)

yourinsta nous t'aimons aussi, maman!! ❤️❤️

charles_leclerc ❤️

joris_trouche you're more annoying now than you were when you two were still private

yourinsta deal with it

charles_leclerc what she said

joris_trouche yourinsta i thought you were on my side?

yourinsta those days are long gone after you made fun of us

user5 she's literally so pretty and nice ❤️🥹🥹

user6 seeing them happy warms my heart 🥹

user7 did he seriously leave Charlotte for her? talk about a downgrade...

user6 excuse me? he's so much happier with Y/N now, it is not your business who he decides to date. plus, she's A GORGEOUS WORLD-RENOWNED SINGER and you're just a sorry excuse of a fan if you would rather bash his girlfriend than actually be happy for them

user5 THIS !!!

comments and re-blogs help us grow!

much appreciated!!

REQUEST HERE

[giirlblood]

caregiver ! vi headcanons !!

requested by @themoondropcollective . spinning around because i LAUV vi , he's one of my own fictional cgs (>/////< " ) . butch cg for eensy butch !! i refer to vi with he / him pronouns .. you can pry tmasc butch vi from my cold dead hands . it brings me comfort as a fellow trans butch to see someone like me :3 .. if you'd prefer other pronouns let me know but i default to he for him . that being said my vi is not a binary man pronouns do not equal gender :L .

vi is the silliest caregiver ever !! more like an older sibling in the sense that he doesn't have lots of rules && can't help but giggle when you get into mischief . he calls you lots of silly nicknames like nugget , bug , && squirt !! he teases you by calling you tiny sometimes as a nickname too but it always comes with a chuckle && a hair tousle .

while its my truth that vi is transmasculine he loves being called "mama" by his littles . you also call him "bubba" but he always melts when someone calls him "mama" or just "ma" . he does Not like being called mommy though . he's also okay with more masculine names like "papa" or "dada" as well && responds better to daddy than mommy though it's not preferred .

always telling you stories !! some of them are made up but a lot of them are about his life . he often gets lost in his tales but you hang onto his every last word .

loves to teach you new things . these little lessons often come with a little story of his own !! he notices you giggling && bites back a laugh of his own . " mama's silly , huh squirt." teaches you how to throw a punch but also about little everyday things like tying your shoes .

SOOOO protective .. literally your guard dog , he will not hesitate to throw a punch or clap back verbally if someone poses a threat to you . king of glares too , he scares away aaallll the meanies . always holding your hand && proudly calling you his little one . he often has his hand on your shoulder as a way to reassure you he's there for back up .

always including your stuffies in everything , he's so playful with them !! if you're sad he'll have them talk to you in silly voices to cheer you up && he has little conversations with them to make you giggle . sometimes he can't help but crack up himself .

he lets you play with his hair && put little clips in it . you love his hair soo much , the color is so AWESOME !! when his hair is longer he lets you style it however you like .

on the topic of hair he loves washing yours . it's super soothing for him && makes him feel closer to you . it's something so intimate that he treasures , running his hands through your hair , doing his best to learn all he can about how to take care of it if you have more kinky hair so he can meet all of your needs .

he's super good at braiding from always doing powder's braids && it's something that calms him down . if you have longer hair he's always happy to braid it — he can do all of the fancy braids !! he tries to teach you but your fingers are a bit clumsy what with you being so little .

even though he himself doesn't always practice safe binding he makes sure that you do . if you whine about it trying to point out that he doesn't he sheepishly says something like , "well you shouldn't do everything daddy does ."

[qu1cks1lversb1tch]

Having them as best friend's:

Multiple X Reader

Contains: Alastor, Angel Dust, Husk, Charlie, Lucifer, Vox, Velvette, Rosie, Adam, Lute, and Valentino

ALASTOR

You're gonna have to hear me out with this one: he's down for the gossip 24/7!!!

He will listen and talk shit with you 100% and I'm not arguing on the matter.

Someone says some wack ass shit to you in public? "I beg your fucking pardon?" With like the scariest grin that fucker can muster.

You start talking to someone? He interrogates them! If they're not strong enough to survive one little interrogation with THE Radio Demon, they're not good enough to date you. Sorry not sorry.

The friendship would be violent, but in almost a sibling type relationship. If he said something absolutely out of line, you'd smack him or kick him in the back of his knees. He'd always get payback, whether it was immediately or a few days/weeks later.

You called him a 'radio faced cunt' once in front of everyone and they all mentally started planning your funeral.

Until he clapped back with something equally as interesting.

He only accepted affection from you and Rosie. And Charlie that one time.

If you had a bad day, he'd know immediately by the look on your face and wouldn't let anyone talk to you until he knew exactly what had made one of his two favorite people upset.

He'd kill them if you told him to. Just supportive bestie shit!

Angel Dust

Let's be real, if you're best friends with Angel, you're probably equally as close with Cherri.

But just you and Angel Dust as best friend's? Shit, he's awesome.

Had a bad day? Go to his room and cuddle Fat Nuggets while you cry/rant about the days woes.

Spontaneous sleepovers BECAUSE YOU CAN!

Platonically flirting to the point that everyone thinks you're together. Neither of you deny the claims, just to keep everyone on their toes.

The words 'love you' followed by something like 'slut' or 'bitch' are common occurrences.

When it comes to dating, Angel just wants you to be happy.

But if someone breaks your heart? He'll come out with guns blazing with no hesitation. NO ONE hurts his bestie.

Platonic cuddles because you love his floof.

Would probably form some sort of marriage pact with you for fun one night when you're both wasted. "Yeah, I'd marry you if we're both still single in 100 years, Toots."

Husk

The banter would be unmatched. You call him a furry and he'll clap back with something that makes your jaw drop before you burst out into laughter.

He'd tell you how it is, regardless of whether you asked or not.

Sure, you're his best friend, and he cares about you. . . But it's because he cares about you that he won't sugarcoat something, even if it's not something you wanna hear.

He would listen to your problems, like any good friend.

He wouldn't trust anyone you had romantic interest in, especially since the ones you always went for had some serious issues.

He'd say something like: "Don't cry to me when that bastard breaks your heart."

And you wouldn't cry to him when it happened, but he'd make you a drink and silently take care of the problem once he had one of the other hotel residents hoist you up to your room.

The next morning you'd tell him he was right and he'd smirk as he wiped down the bar, but wouldn't say anything.

He was never good with affection, so he respects your space and you respect his.

He literally always has your back, even if you don't know it. You do.

Charlie

Honestly, you probably grew up together and that's how the two of you became best friends. (But even if you didn't, everything is still the same.)

She's the friend that's too trusting of everyone, so you easily filled the place of being the friend that questioned everyone's intentions.

You even heavily questioned Vaggie's intentions when Charlie insisted on bringing her around after finding her.

You only warmed up to Vaggie when Charlie admitted her feeling for her, to you one late evening. She was a nervous wreck, but you were always the level-headed friend.

Being best friends with the princess of Hell had some lesser known perks — invitations to high class parties, special access at LuLu World, and the most eventful sleepovers known to Hell.

Whenever you mentioned interest in someone, Charlie was the first to push you to go for it.

If it went wrong, she was always there first, telling you it would be completely fine. If it went good, she was the first to congratulate you.

She's 100% the mom friend. Thirsty? Here's something to drink. Cut your finger? "Here's a bandaid, be more careful."

A relationship similar to siblings, bit without any malice or envy. Just happy to be in each other's presence.

She literally documented everything the two of you did, since the very first time you called her your friend. She's not going anywhere.

Lucifer

Yeah, so, everyone thinks you're dating. Even Charlie is a bit suspicious. You're not, but you had been there by his side for as long as he could remember.

When Lilith left, you filled some part of the void, not allowing Lucifer to go hungry when he spent long days in his office.

On his good days, he's absolutely there for all the tea, especially if it's PIPING HOT. "That bitch said WHAT!?"

He has no filter and will unintentionally intentionally hurt someone's feelings when it comes to you.

He protects you as fiercely as he protects Charlie, despite knowing that you're capable of protecting yourself.

The two of you argue like an old married couple, which only fueled the dating rumors. . . Until you mentioned someone you had interest in.

Bro interrogated everyone you ever liked. Can't handle five minutes with the king of Hell? Not good enough for his bestie. Keep it movin' pal.

No one is allowed to call you a bitch, but him. Anyone else tries, they'll be met with absolute SASS.

Not even joking, Lucifer would be so sassy towards people, to the point that you picked it up.

So the two of you just went around unintentionally terrorizing demons!

Vox

You hate someone? Bet. He'll have someone spy on them and give you the real tea.

Brings you as the plus one for many major events, but bullies you the entire time. You thought you'd get five minutes of peace on your best friends arm? WRONG!

Literally throws toddler meltdown style temper tantrums when it comes to Alastor. You're usually the one who has to reboot him or just smack some sense into him.

You're both pretty level-headed most of the time, but one of you probably has a couple of screws loose. (It's definitely him.)

No one is good enough to date you. Not sorry.

If anyone looks at you wrong, they've signed their second death to double Hell.

You and Vox talk shit about everyone, especially if you've had a hard day.

If it was bad enough, he'd offer to kill the demon who dared make your day shit. He'd still listen to you though.

"Fuck that. You're not going alone." And then you have to wait 15 minutes for him to look 'good enough' to go out, even if you were powerful and just wanted to go on little walk down the street.

Body doubling. Different tasks, silence, but the comfort of having someone else in the room. Absolutely.

Velvette

She likes you slightly more than Vox and Valentino, which is fabulous.

Weekly designated sleepover nights where the both of you unload from the week.

Someone is rude to you? Cue Vel lecturing them on how they fucked up and their career is over, but make it musical.

You went on a date with someone and didn't tell her? "I want details, Lovey! Are they an overlord too? Tell. Me. Everything."

Prepare for Hell's greatest gossip sessions, especially around the topic of Hell's cutthroat fashion industry.

She might not seem like it, but she's a good listener.

You're leaving the tower to run a small errand? Surprise Surprise, she's coming with you and turning it into a whole day, complete with lunch and shopping!

She uses you as a model sometimes, purely because she can.

Will call you a sweet name and insult you in the same breath.

Gets worried if you don't text back within five minutes. She will literally show up to make sure you're alive. You're probably taking a nap.

Rosie

Literally the best to spend the day with. She loves walking with you or just having tea.

Much like Alastor, she would be down for the gossip, but she wouldn't go very far with it.

In terms of relationships, she'd want you to be happy, but would also threaten to eat your partner if they hurt you.

She'd be such a good listener when you came to talk about your day.

She'd even offer advice and just casually drop something like: "Listen to your intuition, darling. It'll tell you others intentions."

At some point or another, everyone questions whether you're dating or not, which both of you laugh at frequently.

She enjoys her privacy, but she also would love having you around more than others.

She would love giving platonic affection, just to make you feel loved.

Sometimes Alastor pops up and Rosie gushes about how the two of you would get along — and immediately you're just thinking how this trio would be iconic.

She doesn't care about your past, you don't care that she's a Cannibal. . . Well, she cares, but she would NEVER hold it against you!

Adam

He literally goes out of his way to piss you off.

There's a lot of threatening and him calling you stuff like 'Sugar Tits'.

Adam annoys you to the point of you WANTING to just jump to Hell, but you never do, because he's your best friend, and you wouldn't want to emotionally traumatize him by making him think that he lost his best friend to Lucifer, AFTER losing his wives to him.

He says "Suck my dick, Bitch" AT LEAST A DOZEN TIMES A DAY. It irritates you to no end.

The banter is unmatched. He wants to get sassy? You're the SASS MASTER.

You pushed him down the stairs for fun and he didn't talk to you for two days.

He doesn't give a fuck who you date, but if they hurt you, he's taking care of them and not telling you SHIT to avoid all of that mushy feelings crap.

The two of you argue too much for anyone to think you're together.

There's NEVER a moment of silence when you're out. He's always singing, talking, laughing, or mimicking the sound of some instrument.

Lute

She's annoyed 24/7 and you're one of the two main causes.

But she wouldn't replace you because who else would put up with her attitude and listen to her rants like you?

If you had a hard day, she'd probably make some offhand comment and then subtly try to make it better by like getting you ice cream with rainbow sprinkles or something.

She hates physical touch, so the only time she touches you is to smack you, probably for saying something very Adam-ish. "Say that shit again and it'll be worse."

She hates everyone you have romantic interest in, but let's you learn your own lessons the hard way.

Nobody could ever picture the two of you as friends, let alone dating.

She's like the sister that has it all but claims she's the black sheep of the family.

Her job comes before everything else in her life, that including you, but when she has time for you, there's usually food and shit talking involved.

She makes sure you drink water every day. She'd kick your ass if you passed out because of dehydration.

She'd give you the key to her place, but you'd never use it unless she told you to. (Like in the event she forgot her set or something)

(I've reached the 10 media limit, so just imagine a gif right here)

Valentino

He offers you a job almost weekly. You hold off on kicking his ass every single time because that's your best friend.

Derives great pleasure from pissing you off.

You don't agree with the manner he treats his employees, so you undermine him every chance you get, just to make sure they get the best treatment possible.

It pisses him off to no end, but he let's it go. He wouldn't hurt you. He couldn't, not without a whole bunch of backlash from quite literally everyone.

Whenever you start liking someone, he warns you to be careful because he knows the industry. He is the industry.

He's gossip central. Talks super exaggerated with his hands and his voice changes whenever he remembers another detail.

He's a touchy feller, that much is evident. He's always touching you in some way, but it's not sexual/romantic or violent, it's more reassurance for both of you. It's a safe middle ground.

You have to leave for some reason? "The limo will take you, but don't touch anything."

He throws tantrums on the regular and you've learned to just let them go on until he eventually shuts the fuck up and let's you speak.

He'll call you a slut and then ask if you want to get food. It's extremely clear that you're not dating lmao.

A/N: I hope this is okay! I've never written for a bunch of these characters, as I just stared writing Hazbin stuff last week, and even then, it was a small Vox one-shot and a Lucifer one-shot.

Requests are open, if anyone would wanna request something for one of these characters? I'd pull through to the best of my ability.

Part Two

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

can i please please please please have a reader/(y/n) running into the main papyri for the first time?

like walk in down the street and the skeleton boi walks into us, reader stumbles and stares up at them mouth agape for a solid five seconds before lighting up and say “so.. so cool!”

i just need the boys to know just how cool they are 😔💀

i hope you have an extra awesome day 😎

Undertale Papyrus - He immediately tries to catch you as you fall forward. You stay a solid two minutes just... staring into the other eyes. Uh. Papyrus blushes for some reason, and then you say he's cool, and now he's even more a mess. How did that even happen? He says you're cool too, and then leaves, the face entirely red. A little part of him hopes to see you again and he even feels bad once back home. He didn't even ask your name. Sans is confused why he's so agitated.

Underswap Papyrus - Uh... What did you just say? Honey was about to apologize for bumping into you and now he's completely speechless, mind entirely blank. He just stares at you and randomly says "I'm a skeleton" before blushing to hell when he realizes he just said something stupid. He blips in thin air, so embarrassed. Blue jumps as he just hears Honey muffles scream in his pillow out of nowhere. Honey is troubled.

Underfell Papyrus - He gives you a dark stare as you bump into him, this close to screaming at you to watch where you're going. But then you say he's cool and he's completely disconcerted. ... What? He takes him a good minute to grow back his angry face. W-Well yes! Of course, he's cool! Because monsters are cool, unlike random humans bumping into strangers! And then he leaves, swaggering, very proud of his line. He's so disturbed as he keeps thinking about this though.

Horrortale Papyrus - He's panicking, scared he might have hurt you, and apologizing again and again. Then you just said he's cool. Willow tells you that's alright, he understands if you want to call the pol... Wait, what. He blinks in complete confusion at you, staring at him with stars in the eyes??? Uh... Ok... He pats you on the head awkwardly and wishes you a good day. You catch him turning several times to stare at you as he leaves. That was weird. But nice. But very weird.

Swapfell Papyrus - Rus stares at you in confusion as you say he's cool. Uh. He's so disturbed he gives you his box of nuggets. And then he leaves, staring at you the whole time, as he faceplants right into a pole. You ask if he's alright, he shakes it off and finger guns at you, before teleporting away. Back home, he's cringing so hard. Finger guns, really? What the hell did he do that for? ... And he just realized he lost his nuggets too. Well, that was something.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - He heard you say he's cool, but uh, he still looks behind him to see if you said that to someone else. Uh. No one. ... Wait, you're talking to him for real? His eyes widened with pure terror. He's not ready to talk to humans yet! No one told him humans could talk to him! As you ask if he's ok, he just starts to hyperventilate, and looks around for something to hug. Well, too bad you're the only thing available. He cling to you all of the sudden, making you flinch in surprise. He then blushes when he realizes what he's doing, apologizes in panic and disappears. He needs to hide in his closet to recover for a bit.

[tiredofthehumanlife]

Eisenhower don't give a fuck

Barbie dolls: Dave Lizewski x gn! Also superhero! Reader

Word:3.1k

Summary: you're also a hero and find out Dave (your boyfriend) is kickass and flirt with him to see his reaction

Warnings: you have daddy issues now, you don't like orange popsicles, based on the second movie so if you haven't watched that it's probably not going to make sense, I'm not suggesting you should watch it bc I hate the romance plot in it but you do you, also insinuated that you're apart of the lgbtq+ and or an extremely passionate ally, feeling unloyal even though you aren't cheating, lots of sex jokes and mentions, you think you're weird and annoying, Marty and you are mean to each other in the friend way yk

Request: seriously stop going through my stuff

Dating Dave was actually quite enjoyable. You could geek over comics together. You sat with his friends during lunch. You scribbled in his notes before returning them, little hearts around the corners. You shared almost everything with each other. The key word there: almost.

Was being a real-life superhero easy? Fuck no. But it gave you that adrenaline rush you got from flirting with Dave so how bad could it be? Not to mention you got to prance around town in your very extremely awesome outfit. You liked it, a lot. You liked people following you on your socials. You liked seeing yourself on the news. You liked helping people and seeing the relief on their faces. You like hanging out with Kickass and all the others in Justice Forever.

Remembering Tommy were a bit of a drag all things considered, but you loved sitting down and hearing about all their life experiences. In fact, a couple of their nuggets of advice actually made you change your day-to-day.

You loved talking and working with Doctor Gravity. He made you laugh and was amazing at his side gig. He’s probably saved your life a thousand times already.

You quite enjoyed talking to Insect Man. In your free time together, you felt like you were able to shed your walls and talk to him about anything. In fact, you went with him to the pride parade in town and helped him organize a local protest.

You were often paired up with Night Bitch because according to Colonel stars and stripes: you had complimentary personalities. You liked being paired up with her because you actually grew to be friends.

Battle Guy had his funny moments. You two seemed to get along but he appeared to be quite attached to Kick-Ass. Which you didn’t mind because you had your own attachments.

To be quite frank, you had already mentally adopted Colonel Stars and Stripes as your father figure. You weren’t sure if he was aware of that. You did however know he called you peanut so maybe he did know.

Sometimes when you asked for advice from him, it sounded like something Juno would hear from her father. It sounded like a dinner, shared over the wooden dining room table, that you helped make even though you couldn’t reach the kitchen counter. It sounded like a movie with ice cream while you were decked out in his band t-shirt even though it was for an adult and you were nothing of the sort.

Every time he told you you did a good job after a night of moderate crime fighting, you felt like he just hung up your stick figures on the fridge. Though you doubted he thought of it that way. It wouldn’t be the first time a random male authority figure became your only source of validation.

Though on the Kick-Ass note, he was strange. You’d mutter an inside joke to yourself, and hear a snort come from Kick-Ass. You just assumed he was quite perceptive. When you two were left alone, there was this strange tension floating between you two. It felt like deja vu. It felt like when you visit an art museum, see a familiar face, can’t place it, and then find it in the mirror the next morning. You just hadn’t gotten to the next morning yet. He made you feel weird. You felt like you should run away from him and hide behind Dave.

You felt unloyal just knowing there was weird tension between you and Kick-Ass. Even though you apparently got along quite well. You laughed at the same jokes, even the same words in some cases. You liked the same movies and comic books. You even thought he was just as funny as Dave. Which you hated because Dave was very important to you.

Every time you laughed at Kick-Ass’ jokes you felt your heart squeeze at the thought of Dave sitting at home thinking of you. After every laugh, you both sighed heavily like you could feel the weight of something returning to your shoulders. You assumed he was thinking of his homework or some shit. It wasn’t your business but you were positive it wasn’t hypothetical infidelity.

You avoided pairing up with Kick-Ass. You didn’t even stand next to him. You didn’t want his vibes getting onto your skin. Alas, Colonel Stars and Stripes didn’t pick up on your subtlety, pairing you two together again.

Though this time was different. You two had just been wandering around, waiting for some crime to catch up with you. You mentioned your favorite movie of all time and Kick-Ass dropped possibly the best thing you had ever heard.

“Oh my god, my partner fucking loves that movie.” Ah, see most people don’t normally enjoy learning someone has a partner, you, on the other hand, loved this new piece of information. You stopped walking. Kick-ass turned back around to probably raise an eyebrow, you can’t see.

“You have a partner?” You asked, already feeling your lips peel into a grin. Kick-Ass shrugged.

“Yeah? Is that so unbelievable?” He asked, slapping his hand onto the side of his thigh. You shook your head.

“No, It’s not unbelievable.” You said. You skipped, literally, ahead. You were beaming the rest of the night. You still tried to ignore Kick-Ass during the other meeting though now with the new information you were slightly less abrasive.

One night, alike many other nights, Dave knocked on your door right as you were getting ready for bed. You raised a brow at his appearance. He was missing his glasses, and nacho cheese was smeared over his face, primarily over his eye and mouth area. Though it wasn’t in his hair or on his clothes.

“Dude, you have to stop eating so messy. It is not a good look for you.” You said, pulling the door open further.

“Someone threw nachos at me, which I am quite upset about. I wanted to kiss you once I got over here but now I have to clean my face.” Dave said, shrugging his backpack and jacket off to drop them by the door. You snorted, making the corner of Dave’s mouth tip up. He left for the bathroom. You stood in the doorway and watched him, committing the image to your memory so you could think of Dave while you were on the hunt for misbehavior. Dave glanced at you from the corner of his eye before squeezing them closed again to scrub his face with water. He pulled his head back, blowing water away from his mouth with a huff.

“Could you get my glasses and extra shirt out of my bag?” Dave asked, dipping his head back to the sink. You spun around and headed for his bag. You thought for a moment, which pocket would Dave put his glasses and extra shirt in? Of course the biggest one. You zipped it open. You paused when you were met with a plastic bag covered in red font repeating ‘Thank you’. You furrowed your brows at the sight of green peeking through the white. You pulled on the loose knot, staring down at the very iconic Kick-Ass green covered in nacho cheese. You paused and thought back on it.

Kick-Ass laughed at the inside jokes that you only made with Dave. Kick-Ass had a partner who had the same favorite movie as you. Of course Kick-Ass made you feel some weird tension because he was your fucking boyfriend. You never ever heard Dave talk bad about Kick-Ass. They had the same favorite comics, movies literally everything. You finally reached the next morning.

“Holy shit.” You whispered, glad the sink was still running so Dave couldn’t hear you.

“They should be in the front pocket, baby,” Dave called from the bathroom. You retied the plastic bag and zipped up the big pocket as fast as you could. You brought Dave his glasses and extra shirt and pretended you had no idea the whole night.

However, on the next mission, you volunteered to pair with Kick-Ass. Kick-Ass gave you a questioning look. You shrugged. Eventually, you two were off, once again wandering about. You knew you truly shouldn’t but you wanted to fuck with Dave a little.

“Hey, Kick-Ass? You said you have fucked nerve endings right? You can’t feel when people hit you?” You said, balancing the edge of the sidewalk, your arms stuck out on either side of you. Kick-ass was walking next to you, his hands clasped behind his back.

“No, you can’t slap me,” Kick-Ass responded, taking one step away from you.

“No, I was just wondering if that made it hard for you to have sex. Like does that fuck with those nerve endings?” You said blatantly, keeping your eyes on the sidewalk so you didn’t fall. Kick-ass sputtered, making you grin.

“What? No. I mean, No that’s none of your business.” Kick-Ass said, taking another step away from you. You snorted. You stopped and dropped your hands to your sides.

“You sure? ‘Cause I could help you out with that. There’s a public restroom right around the corner. Or we could just use the alley.” You said, taking a step closer to him. Dave held his hands up in surrender, leaning away from you.

“I have a partner. I am dating someone. They sexually gratify me perfectly. I am seeing someone, who I love deeply. I am severely committed.” Kick-Ass said, squeezing his eyes shut. You snorted and walked away from him, completely ignoring the fact that now your face was hot from him confessing his love.

“I’m just fucking with you Dave, don’t take me seriously. I would never fuck in an alley, that’s like STD grand central station.” You said, balancing on the edge of the sidewalk again.

“Sorry, wait, what’d you call me?” Kick-Ass asked. You kept walking, though now you thought back on your words. You grimaced when you realized you called him by his real name.

“I called you a bitch.” You said. Well done, that was perfect. No notes. Kick-Ass met your pace, walking beside you. He leaned his head to the side, trying to make eye contact with you.

“No, you didn’t. What did you call me?” He asked. You shrugged.

“You called me Dave. Why did you do that?” You stopped and met his eyes. You shrugged.

“I think we actually do need that alley now, come with me.” You split off to the nearest alley, pulling Dave into the shadows. You glanced around to make sure no one was around before yanking your mask off.

“It’s me, Dave.” Kick-Ass gasped, taking a step away from you. He spun around, his hands on his head.

“Oh my god, I’ve slept with a real-life superhero.” He muttered. He pulled his mask off, dragging his hands through his hair.

”To be fair I also had this reaction when I found out about you.” You said, shoving your mask into your belt. Dave spun back around to you, gripping your face with both his hands.

“God, you gorgeous pain in the ass. I love you so much.” He pulled you closer to him, resting his lips against yours. You reached out and tugged him closer by the green fabric pulled over his stomach. Dave groaned into your lips, slipping his hands under your arms to hold onto your back. He pulled back just enough to whisper to you.

“Stars and Stripes is going to kill us,” Dave said. You nodded against him, pushing your lips back against his.

“Stop thinking about him, think about how we’re totally going to fuck in these costumes.” You muttered. Dave’s hand found the back of your head, holding you still while he slipped his tongue past your lips.

By the time everyone did meet back at the base, you and Kick-ass were stuck together like glue. Colonel dismissed everyone, but Kick-ass’ hand shot out for Battle Guys’ arm.

“Hey Coronal, we have bad news.” You said. Colonel turned around looking between you three.

“You haven’t started selling drugs have you?” You shook your head.

“We all know each other, in real life,” Kick-Ass said. Battle Guy jerked his arm out of Kick-Ass’ hand.

“No, the fuck we don’t. I know you,” Battle Guy pointed at Kick-Ass. “Don’t know who that is.” Battle Guy pointed at you. You made a mental note to add a middle finger to Marty’s birthday card. Colonel grimaced at Battle Guy.

“Language.” Colonel pinched his brow as he looked between the three of you. “How long have you known this?”

“I’ve known since yesterday, Kick-Ass found out today. Battle Guy is apparently still behind.” You said. Colonel sighed.

“Do you hate me?” You asked, making Colonel raise an eyebrow.

“Why would I hate you?” You shrugged, feeling everyone’s eyes turn to you.

“I don’t know. I was just checking because-“

“Oh my god.” You heard Battle Guy say. You glanced over at him to see him wandering away from the line you three had formed.

“What!” You responded, following him with your eyes. He dragged his hands over his head.

“I just figured out who you are.” He said, dropping his hands to his sides. ”I recognized you from your daddy issues.” You scoffed at Marty.

“You recognized me from my daddy issues? You know what-“ You said, your voice raising. You pointed your finger at Battle Guy. Kick-ass’ hands shot out, pressing either one to you and Marty’s chest.

“Okay, okay. No fighting, there’s no point.” You sighed, dropping it. You faced Colonel again. He hummed.

“Do you know what we call this?” Colonel said, waving his hands around at you three. You shrugged, glancing at Dave to see if he knew.

“No?” Kick-ass muttered.

“Loserville party of one?” Battle Guy asked. You huffed, looking around Dave to glare at Marty. Kick-ass reached out and lightly pushed your head back.

“Not my problem. C’mon Eisenhower. Let’s allow these doofuses to solve this on their own.” Colonel replied, tugging on Eisenhower’s leash. She quickly pranced after him. You waited until you heard the door slam shut before tugging your mask off. You turned to Marty, sticking your finger in his face again.

“Fuck you, Marty. I’m setting your birthday present on fire.” You said, huffing and turning away from Marty.

“Yeah, that wasn’t necessary. We talked about how we don’t bring up parental issues anymore, Marty. There was an entire family meeting about it.” Dave said, pulling off his own mask. Marty huffed and yanked his off.

“I didn’t listen during that meeting and you know it,” Marty responded.

“Still.”

“Whatever Marty, just don’t talk about it again.” You said, pulling your mask back over your head and leaving the building.

Marty did apologize the next evening at Dave’s house. You, Marty, Todd, and Dave went over to Dave’s house every day to hang out because the time at school you had together just wasn’t enough.

You and Marty were sat outside, eating the popsicles you stole from the freezer. Dave’s dad banned everyone from eating them inside because once Marty dropped one on the couch. It's been forever sticky. So there you two were, sitting on the steps of the back porch in the dark. The dull and faded light from the living room stretched out through the glass sliding door.

“I actually am sorry, about the other night. I know sometimes I am a dick. I don’t know why I’m like that. I just am.” Marty said, taking another bit of his orange popsicle. You hummed.

“I’m the same way. Sometimes I’m just weird and annoying, I don’t know why. Just am.” You said, chomping into the blue popsicle you were holding. Marty hummed, licking down the side of his hand at the streak of melted juice. A quiet moment went by where you stared up at the dark sky and ignored the very loud sound of Marty slurping.

“For what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re annoying,” Marty said, biting into his popsicle again. You paused on your popsicle, looking over at him.

“Really?” Marty nodded, glancing at you from the corner of his eye.

“I mean weird, for sure-“ You shoved Marty’s shoulder.

“Oh fuck off.” You laughed, shaking your head at him. Marty snorted. You continued with your popsicle, though now your lips were tilted up.

“Also when I said Loserville party of one, I was talking about you,” Marty added, taking another bite out of his popsicle. You rolled your eyes.

“I know!”

“Just checking, 'cause you never laughed,” Marty said, tilting his head back to catch the runaway bit of popsicle.

“Yeah, it wasn’t funny.” You both sat in silence as you paused in eating your popsicle to watch Marty and his messy eating. He pulled back and glanced at you.

“So do you actually think of Colonel Stars and Stripes as your dad?” He asked, chomping again. You scoffed. You shoved his shoulder again, making him rock to the side. You finished your popsicle, licking the wooden stick. Marty was maybe two bites from finishing his. The glass door slid open. You turned back. Dave smiled at you.

“You guys coming in soon? We’re about to set up our next board game.” Dave said. Marty turned back, nodding at Dave.

“Yeah, baby.” Dave hummed and took the four steps from the door to you. He leaned down and lightly pecked your lips. He pulled back, his tongue darting it between his lips.

“Blue?” You nodded. He hummed and left, sliding the glass door behind him. Marty waited a moment, watching Dave retreat to the coffee table through the glass. You watched too although for different reasons.

“How long is Dave?” Marty asked. You gasped, smacking the last bite of popsicle out of Marty’s hand. It flipped in the air and leaned in the grass with an unsatisfying ‘thush’.

“Hey! What was that for?” Marty said, sadly looking down at the orange popsicle bite now covered in green grass.

“Potty mouth.” You said, standing up. You picked your popsicle stick off the step. Marty stood up after you, joining you at your side.

“It was ass anyway,” Marty muttered. You nodded, dragging open the glass door.

“You picked orange, I’m not sure what you were expecting.” You said, throwing your stick into the garbage. You and Marty joined Dave and Todd at the coffee table to start the game. You greeted Dave with a kiss and settled onto the floor next to him. Marty sat across from you and wiggled his eyebrows at you.

“I’m not answering your sick question dude!” You responded. Dave worriedly hummed.

“What’d he ask you?” Dave asked. You shook your head and patted his cheek.

“Don’t worry your pretty head about it.”

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Our perfect Addition | Platonic Yandere Mei Mei and Ui Ui

When you were recruited into Jujutsu Tech, you could not settle in. Given an ultimatum about joining or your family suffering from unknown consequences. It doesn’t give you an all too positive relationship with the school. Often having to be reminded of your life and family’s lives on the line. You're eventually placed in the first year's class under the supposed strongest Gojo Satoru. Not that it mattered to you. 

“OKAY! This is your new classmate! Introduce yourself, newbie.”

“Nice to meet you all.”

“So so (Y/n)-chan! Tell us something about yourself!”

“I didn’t want to enroll but was forced to. Otherwise, my family will be-”

He slaps a hand on your mouth and then pushes you toward the trio. 

“Awesome introduction! Welcome to the team!”

Despite your disgruntled disposition you tend to hold your own quite well. Able to come out mostly unscathed thanks to your technique. Speaking of your technique one of its functions allows attacks against you to become diamonds and minerals that you can maneuver throughout the battle. When you’re not using them to fight, you aren’t afraid to fashion them into jewelry or, after meeting Maki, weapons. Needless to say, it’s helpful when it comes to anyone you’re fighting against cursed users or curses themselves.

Which is perfect for defending your friend in the Kyoto School Exchange. Their attacks both physical and cursed are thwarted by your own until the violent interruption. Before then though the professors watched with anticipation.

“Gojo Satoru, how much for the gem maker?”

The Kyoto School Exchange is where she sees you in action. She’s heard the whispers that Gojo’s been given a treasure-making curse-user for a student. She doubts it's as weird as they speak of but someone so money-driven is bound to be curious. 

The crow that returns from the forest is clutching a nugget of gold. Mei Mei gets it appraised and true enough it is a bonafide mineral. One selected among others you carry away or leave behind from your violent battle with the intruders.

“Not for sale.”

Gojo’s warning is ignored as Mei Mei is constantly sending crows to follow. She watches how you pay for your family’s expenses and spend time with them when you’re not scheduled for a mission. She notes how big you smile when they greet you and how hard you laugh. She finds it endearing. 

So endearing she devotes more of her energy to watching you do anything and everything. Where you go with your friends, where you eat, how you sleep. If it weren’t for Gojo she’d have a more concrete copy of your schedule by now but having the general ideas of your life is a good start.

“Nee-Sama! Don’t you want me by your side?”

“ I need you to watch someone for me.”

“Only for you, Nee-Sama!”

She kicks herself for asking Gojo about you. Since then he’s been hard-pressed to keep you far from her as you go on different missions. He’s strong but he can’t control everything. Sooner than he can threaten the council, Ui Ui is assigned to accompany you as you take on a grade 2 curse. 

“Uhm hope we can work together well, Ui Ui.”

“Hmph! I’m not going to speak to you, money bag.”

He quite obviously was jealous of his sister’s interest in you. Constantly degrading you or insulting you as you both learn how to work together and handle the curse. Despite his prickly beginnings with you, he finds himself in awe of you…

“Ui Ui! Teleport me onto the debris it consumes. I don’t care which one just do it.”

“But if you do that your gems won’t be able to manage your fall!”

“Don’t worry about it! Just do it.”

From what he’s heard from his sister you were forced into this. Unable to choose this life you’re still so willing to put yourself at risk. With the way the battle had been going, you could easily abandon the mission claiming it was too advanced. But you stayed and devoted your limited gems to protecting him.

With a pout and a blush, he found himself accepting the hug you gave him in achieving your victory. He cheekily praises you on the plan you came up with, still insulting you enough to keep you from noticing.

“You’re not nearly as powerful as my beloved Nee-Sama! She would have handled this in minutes.”

“Didn’t you say she was a special-grade sorcerer?”

“Yes…and by that standard we were decent.”

“Yeah, 30 minutes is pretty good.”

“Your standards need to be raised–” “Hey!” “-I think it’s important we keep contact for when that day comes.”

“Is this you’re roundabout way to ask for my number so we can hang out?”

“Think what you want! My Nee-Sama is the only one I bother planning to meet…I’ll text you.”

He’s lucky you don’t have a technique like Mei Mei’s otherwise you’d tease him to no end about how he kicks his feet when he texts you. With a blush and a chuckle, he’ll happily let his sister come in close as they watch your snap stories or a video you took.

“They seem perfect for us Nee-sama.”

“I agree. Now all that’s left is to take them for ourselves. Now to get past the famous Gojo Satoru.”

“You could beat him. Nee-Sama!”

“Hmmm, if only.”

The Shibuya incident couldn’t come any sooner. Having been paired up with Nobara, the siblings are all too keen on your proximity to them. When you casually respond to a text Ui Ui sends at the beginning of the mission, you couldn’t possibly be aware of the gears turning in their heads.

“Ara Yuji-kun, the gem user is also training to be a special grade, correct?”

“Uh yes, they were sayin’ something about retiring.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah!”

“Don’t respond so casually at Nee-Sama!”

Mei Mei is quick to take advantage when Gojo is sent in to fight. Far too focused on his battle she can devote a crow or two to follow your progress and intervening at close calls. Her plan is only to watch you, it is an unexpected advantage that the sorcerer that’s been guarding you so closely is sealed. 

“Eh? Gojo’s been sealed? What an interesting turn of events…he still owes me.”

After surviving the run-in with Kenjaku, she has no intentions of staying in Shibuya. She needed to change her currency after all. Before she leaves, she makes a point not to leave her gem, swiping you up before you can register. 

“W-what just–”, you call out as you look at your new environment. No longer in the heat of battle, you look amazed at the lush and luxurious hotel room. High above a glowing city, this wasn’t Shibuya…it didn’t even look like Japan.

“(Y/n)!”

Ui Ui hugs you tightly, beginning to worryly obsess over your wounds. When the crow imbued with his technique landed on you mid-fight, you were on the cusp of being greatly injured. A few scars, a broken rib, and muscles that’ll make your body ache for days are what you got away with. You considered yourself better off than some of the seniors you were fighting alongside.

“I have to go back! They need me!”

You struggle against Ui Ui’s tight grip, who took advantage of your injury to hold you still, you can’t properly detach yourself. Mei Mei pays no mind to your determined snarl, not even looking in your direction as she hurriedly types on her computer.

“Gojo Satoru’s been sealed.”

“I know that!”

“Do you though? Your family was promised to be protected as long as you stay in Jujutsu Tech.”

You think for a moment. You deflated, “Gojo….”

Finished typing she comes to your side, not minding her brother as she cradles your head to her chest, “With Gojo no longer around do you think they’d bother to keep them around?”

You floundered,“I- don’t- I–” 

Ui Ui hugs you tight, bringing your attention back to him as he looks up at you. 

“We are your family now.”

“What?!”

Mei Mei’s hands held your chin turning your face towards hers. Her hair was down and she was wearing a hotel’s robe. With a bandaid on her right cheek and the deep red of her lipstick. The look on her face was unreadable, her eyes looked too gleeful in comparison to yours.

“(Y/n), your family is being housed by some friends of mine.”

“But they didn’t tell me they moved.”

She chuckled, “Of course, they haven’t I wouldn’t allow them to.”

When you looked at her suspiciously, she squeezed your cheeks.

“For their safety, of course. I care for those I invest in.”

She let her other hand pet Ui Ui’s head. He blushed intensely muffling a ‘Nee-Sama’ into your clothes. You felt your lip curl in disgust.

“So you want me for the gems I make right?”

She smiled to herself, before beginning to unbutton your school uniform. Ui Ui readjusted his hug, forcing your arms to your sides as Mei Mei undid all your buttons. 

“I might have also decided you were just as valuable as your technique.”

You scoffed, “Yeah I doubt that.”

She laughed at you. “Think what you like but I’m sure your…family would love to hear from you.”

She held a burner phone out to you. It was opened to a contact profile with a group picture of your family. Wriggling your arm out of Ui Ui you reached to snatch it away only for her to easily hold it further away from you. 

“It’d be a shame if I changed my mind about funding their protection. Stay in my care from now on.”

“What are you getting at–”

The phone began to ring. You frantically reached for it, willing to endure Ui Ui’s grip and graze the edge of the phone.

“Promise me, (Y/n).”

“I-I promise! Please!” 

With a nod, the arms holding you released, letting you stumble and wince as you answer the call. With your back to the two of them, they smiled at one another gazing at the uniform shirt that easily slipped off in your struggle for the phone. Mei Mei holds the cloth in her hands caressing the jeweled buttons, she knows you custom-made. 

“Ui Ui.”

“Yes Nee-Sama?” 

“Wash their uniform and give them the change of clothes we brought for them.”

“Of course Nee-Sama!”

She starts to make her way back to the computer, resuming her business with those on the other line. Turning her head over her shoulder she watched the way you fiddled with the plants in the hotel room while chatting excitedly on the phone. She smiled as she watched her brother eye the shirt with a deep blush.

“Oh, Ui Ui.”

“Yes, Nee-Sama?”

“Be sure to breathe in with both your nose and mouth. It’s less likely you’ll pass out that way.”

“Thank you Nee-Sama.”

Looking out at the city Mei Mei felt triumphant. She finally had her gem and with the world ending, it was the perfect time.

[that-trans-autistic-guy]

DBD Incorrects Quotes from a Random Generator Online

Edwin: You have your weirdly sincere humility Charles: I prefer the term 'self loathing' actually

Edwin: No more making fun of me when I misuse dated cultural references, alright? Are we cowabunga on this? Crystal, sighing: Fine. We're cowabunga.

Niko: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life. Crystal: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back… Charles: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this. Mick: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years. Jenny: I knew I lost that potential somewhere. Edwin: Mental stability, my old friend! Niko: Jesus, could you guys lighten up a little?

Niko: We all have our demons. Crystal, grabbing David: This one’s mine!

Crystal: Seriously, all you do is bitch. Edwin: I happen to bitch the perfect amount for someone in my situation.

Edwin: Ask me anything. Go ahead, I'll give you a straight answer. Charles: Why are we so fucking awesome? Edwin: That's the best fucking question anybody's ever asked.

The Sprites: PEASANT. I REQUIRE SUSTENANCE. Niko: You know there are other ways to say you want McDonalds. The Sprites: FOUL PLEBEIAN. YOU DARE SPEAK AGAINST ME— Niko: sigh What do you want? The Sprites: Chicken nuggets please.

Charles: Are you a cuddler? Edwin: I'm a machine of death and destruction. Charles: Edwin: …Yeah, I'm a cuddler.

Esther: You’d be stupid to lay a hand on me. Charles: Oh, you’d be surprised how much stupid shit I do.

The squad is playing a team sport Niko: Are you upset you don’t get to be on the same team as Edwin? Charles: Have you ever played a game with Edwin? Niko: No… Charles: Have you ever been trapped in a cage with a wolverine? Meanwhile, on the other side of the field Edwin, chasing Crystal: I SAID FASTER! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORD “FASTER” MEANS? IT MEANS MORE FAST!!!!

Crystal: Why are we friends? Edwin: Poor decisions on your part.

Charles: falls down the stairs Edwin: Are you okay? Niko: Stop falling down the stairs! Crystal: How’d the ground taste?

Crystal, T-posing in the doorway: Greetings, Jenny. Jenny, not looking up from their coffee: Good morning, problem child.

Edwin: My level of gay has reached “sighing deeply whenever anything extremely heterosexual happens near me”.

Monty: Why is it so hard for you to believe me?! Charles: … Monty: Oh, right. The lying.

Charles: Being half asleep and feeling someone gently plant a kiss on your forehead is one of the purest kinds of love in the world. Crystal: Unless you're home alone.

Edwin: Are you really planning to shoot the demon? Crystal: Don't worry, it's a holy gun. Edwin: How so? Crystal: It makes holes.

Crystal: I need life advice. Jenny, sipping wine and eating cookie dough: You came to the right person.

Charles: Edwin, you love me, right? Edwin: Normally I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won’t like.

Edwin: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine. Charles: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again. Edwin: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?? Charles: Is it working?

Charles: Edwin taught me to think before I act. Charles: …So if I smack the shit out of you, rest assured that I thought about it and am confident in my decision.

Night Nurse, smugly, after security arrives to escort Edwin and Charles out: So, do you wanna walk out of here or do you wanna be carried out? Edwin, in defeat: Let’s go. Charles: Wait. Edwin: What? Charles: I’d kinda like to be carried out…

[weridpersonhelp]

CASABONITA PT1

Description: Kyle invites Y/n to Casa Bonita, and muck around.

warning; Swearing, fluffy. cartman being cartman. not been proof read

_______________

"Hey Y/n."

"Oh, hey Kyle! how are you doing?" Y/n asks him, somehow Y/n always manages to make Kyle smile.

"Pretty good actually, I aced my math test and cartman hasn't made and well I have awesome news!" Y/n chuckles a little at him, her smile made his smile. bigger.

"Nice job, mine's tomorrow. what's this awesome news?" She starts walking Kyle follows her lead.

"Well, my birthday this weekend on Saturday and my mum said I could take 4 friends to Casa Bonita! and well... I wanted to invite you! that is if you want too." Y/n gasps slightly she stops in the middle of walking.

"REALLY! THATS SO COOL!"

"Wait so you'll come?!" Y/n hugs Kyle happily he was a bit taken back he felt Awkard and didn't want people to see, but he still enjoyed it.

"Yes of course I'm going! is there anything you want for your birthday then?" she asks pully away from him, he missed her warmth already.

"What? Oh, you don't need to get me anything!" Y/n rolls her eyes at the boy playfully.

"Okay, okay I won't get anything. but what have you been interested in lately?" Now it was Kyles turn to playfully roll his eyes at the girl they both chuckle.

"Wait who else is coming."

"Oh, stan, Kenny and butters this Saturday at 5:30"

"No cartman? she asks.

" What no, why would I invite that asshole?" he raises his voice at even the thought of it. she chuckles at the boy's anger calming him down instantly as she pats his back.

"Good, I was worried for a moment you'd let that guy come on your special day." the two continued to talk as they entered the dining hall and walked up to chef.

"Hey Kyle oh I see you made a new friend here."

"Oh yes this is Y/n " Kyle says.

"Hi chef it's nice it be properly introduced."

"Nice to meet you too Y/n now what can I get you love birds- I mean friends." Chefs give Kyle a wink.

"Chicken nuggets with fries please!"

"Chicken nuggets with fries please!" the two say at the same time.

"Jinx! now you can't talk till I say your name three times!"

"Haha, she got you there! Kyle, anyway here's your food ids. Rember to let him go of that jinx before his birthday now Y/n." Chef says they both leave, but Kyle was playfully glaring at her slightly.

"What? do you want me to say your name?" the boy nods furiously almost flipping his hat off.

"Oh, hey guys, what's up?" stan asks them.

"Hey stan, nothing much." Kyle stays quiet and stand rises an eyebrow.

"what's up with Kyle?"

"Oh Kyle? well Kyle here just got jinx and I need to say his name three times until he is unjinxed or he gets bad luck." at this Cartman laughs at Kyle.

"s-" "you can't talk dude unless you want bad luck," stan says Kyle gives the girl a glare and she rolls her. eyes.

"Fine as your birthday present, I'll unjinx you Kyle-" "SHUT YOUR MOUTH FATASS!" Kyle shouts at cartman.

"Y/n come on already, bebe showing us her new nails!" Wendy pop in out of no were.

"oh, hi stan!"

"Hi Wendy."

"Okay, okay, I'll talk to guys later. bye!"

"Bye Y/n!" Kyle says waving the girl goodbye.

"Dude you're so red-" "oooh KYLE BLUSHING!"

"SHUT UP THE BOTH OF YOU!"

______________________________________

yall want part 2? where they acutally go? or

[icycoldninja]

Hii hope ur well ❤️ can I request Dante taking care of fem reader after a long tiring day of work

Thank you, I'm doing fantastic, I hope you are as well. Time for fluff!

Quiet night in (Dante x Fem!Reader)

Work had been hectic the last few days; you'd been coming home late and exhausted nearly every day. Dante had noticed your exhaustion--not that you were trying to hide it--and decided that the next time you left for work, he'd spend the entire day cleaning up the house, cooking (to the best of his abilities), and setting things up for a nice quiet night in later.

When you got home that night, you were surprised to see the floors mopped, appliances polished, and food on the table. "Wow..." You mumbled, honestly surprised. You strode into the kitchen, finding two big bowls of macaroni and cheese on the table, as well as a large platter of dinosaur chicken nuggets. You chuckled as you headed towards the sink to wash your hands, astonished as to how you could forget Dante's immaturity so easily.

Childish or not, it was awesome of him to do that for you, you couldn't have been more grateful. You were about to locate and thank him for his generosity, when you suddenly became aware of this strange thumping noise coming from the staircase. You poked your head out of the kitchen and caught sight of something truly bizarre.

Dante, wearing Dr. Faust, was dancing his way down the stairs, a boombox over his shoulder. "Ah, Y/N, you're home!" He announced, tossing the boombox onto the couch and running up to you before scooping you into his arms and twirling yactually. You giggled, throwing your arms around his shoulders and kissing him. "Thanks for making dinner, Dante." He grinned in response, carrying you to the kitchen. "Oh, so you saw? Good. Hope you like chicken nuggies!" You laughed; he nudged the char away from the table with his foot and carefully lowered you into it. "Now...let's eat, then we can watch a movie," He said, plopping into his seat and shoveling a huge spoonful of mac and cheese into his mouth.

After you two had finished eating, Dante picked you up and carried you to the living room, instructing you to pick a movie to watch while he took care of the dishes. You insisted on doing them yourself, but Dante's will was iron; he refused to let you do any work. "You've been working yourself ragged, babe," He called, barely audible over the sounds of clanking dishes and running water. "Take a minute and chill."

And so you did, draping yourself over the couch and scrolling through your favorite streaming service until you found an interesting looking movie. You called Dante, who arrived with two giant bowls of popcorn, one for you and one for him. He slid onto the couch and pulled you into his lap, hooking an arm around you and tugging you close. The warmth was appreciated; calming, even.

Dante had accomplished his mission. You had a relaxing evening, snuggling up with your boyfriend and binge-watching TV all night long.

[fizzywashere87]

~Moots Tags~

I love every single one of you!! <3 (I'm not sorry that I summoned you all here)

#lori-lorrrr! (my moots @serendipitous-girl she's just lori 🥰)

#souly-nummers! (my moots @fashionably-souly she's just souly 🥰)

#sunny-skyes! (my moots @kozumesphone ILYSM PLEASE TOUCH MY BALLS!! 😄)

#rosey-rocks! (my moots @fluffyr0cky they're adorable and a lil floof!! <3)

#angel-cutie! (my moots @angelcherryblossoms she's a cutie and we need to have more conversations! <3)

#fuck-nuggets! (my moots @dinosaur-nuggets who is very awesome-pookieness and likes the fuck word!)

#lee! (my moots @did-i-mention-the-shirt who is super funny and cool! ur uber awesome! :D)

#sniper-my-pookie! (my moots @snipersiniora who is super awesome and i love interacting with you!)

#beetle-boo-boo-bear! (my moots @jinxed-things-ringing who you should totally interact with!! i promise they're superrrr cool!!)

#sunny-bum-bum! (my moots @lotus-sunn who is very very awesome and ur such a sweetheart!!)

#the-better-eyebrow! (my moots @donnieslefteyebrow9000 who is super cool and obviously better than the right eyebrow!)

#kit-kat-waddle-wat! (my moots @angelitaby who is such a talented writer and a whole vibe!!! love u kat!!)

#pam-pam-certified-badass! (my moots @thegreatgodpam who seems like a certified badass! (u are)

#kitty-wiz! (my moots @kittykittyanon who is super super sweet!! i love u smsmsmsmsm /p!! <3)

#daniiii! (my moots @acutiewithagun who is super awesome and cool! you're so sweet!! :D)

#oliverrrr! (my moots @olisix823 who seems like a certified sweetheart!!! i'm so glad to be moots with you!)

#blair-bae! (my moots @baecakie who is super sweet and awesome!!!)

#finnister-my-man! (my moots @finleyforevermore who is super cool and awesome!! i can tell we're going to be besties forever!)

#ollie-ollie! (my moots @tvb0y who's super super cool!!!)

#ace-ace-baby! (my moots @actuallyacerrr who's super awesome and sweet!![SORRY FOR NOT ADDING THE TAG SOONER I THOUGHT I HAD IT ALREADY])

#marzipan-bam! (my moots @scrunchiesandquips who's super super cool and awesome!! i love our convos!!)

#lotta-lotties! (my moots @planetloserr! you're super duper preppy and i love ur blog!!)

#oogie-boogie! (my moots @old-poptart who's super funny and literally my twin!)

#lovelykil!!! (my moots @lovelykil you're funny asf and i hope to interact w you more!)

#cvnt-serves! (my moots @cvnts4him i'm sorry i lost the drip so quickly- but i hope to interact with you more!)

#isaiah-the-goat! (my moots @mygoogledrivescaresme you seem chill asf and i fw it!!)

#doki-doki! (my moots @dokidokidraft i lit js followed you back but im so excited to interact with you more!!!!)

There's always more to be added!!

(As I moved this to a separate post, I realize how backhanded all of these compliments sound but I promise it's not like that guys please-)

[phoenixwatchesmovies]

Dracula Season Watch Party: The Lost Boys (1987)

After moving to a new town, two brothers discover that the area is a haven for vampires. - Dir. Joel Schumacher

Let's get one thing straight: this movie isn't. Stick a pin in that because we'll get back to that in due time.

In that case, though, WHERE DO I START? This is a fucking great movie and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise. (I didn't say you have to like it. Quality is objective and personal taste is not. Go forth with that nugget of wisdom.)

Starting at the beginning, then, we get one of the best movie themes ever written (as evidenced by the amount of covers that exist), some of my favorite establishing shots ever filmed, and the character entrance that made me say out loud, "OH SHIT 👀"

YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN. As the top comment on the video says, "you know it's awesome when you click just to watch the opening."

The entire movie is like that, TBH. It's almost as quotable as The Princess Bride Thee Greatest Movie Ever Made, and is matched only by The Shining for scenes I'll just watch on their own because I love them that much. Like this one, for instance, that I'm linking because I'm going to bring it up again later:

^^ the music, the camera, the lighting, the transition from the headlights to the lighthouse... It's so good...

Other great music moments include the "People Are Strange" montage of slice-of-life style clips of folks going about their day in Santa Carla intercut with all the posters of missing people hung up around the boardwalk, "I Still Believe" featuring Tim Cappello, Tina Turner's former saxophone player, "Walk This Way" as the boys close in on the surfers on the beach, and ENDLESS uses of "Cry Little Sister."

Brief moment to talk about the Emerson family dynamic. Script, performances, and direction all work together in all the best ways so you never doubt how much they care about each other, or how far they'll go for each other. You can argue for family being one of the core themes of the story, whether it's the one you're born into or the one you're...well, born in a sense, into. Either way, it's about the bonds you make, be it for a lifetime or an eternity.

Grandpa gets his own bullet for being such an icon, and for having the absolute #1 best last line of a movie in history. We waited an hour and a half for the punchline of a joke we didn't even notice we were being told. 🫡

Suppose I'll move onto the Frog brothers. Their antics are where most of the comedy comes from, and if there's one thing I have a problem with in this movie, it's the way the two halves don't quite fit together. Michael and David and Co. work on their own as an edgy, stylish, coming-of-age story. Sam and the Frog brothers are the most obvious giveaway that the original concept was something a bit more similar to The Goonies. And it's probably because I like the vampires a lot more, but the kids just aren't that interesting. They're funny and necessary, but I'm not as invested in what they're doing.

Which brings us back to the Lost Boys themselves. The name is a deliberate reference to Peter Pan, and that's where the tragedy of the whole thing comes in. Screenwriter James Jeremias, after reading Interview With The Vampire and the character Claudia in particular, ran with the idea that the reason Peter and his gang never grow up is because they're vampires (which came first, this movie, or the theory that Peter and Co. are the souls of dead children?). You can see that influence throughout the story, and apparently David and the boys were meant to contrast with Michael in the way they represent adolescence, given they're eternal teenagers.

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut I don't get that very much. I'm sure it's there, but in terms of x vs y, the vampires and the Frog brothers have always stood out more to me. Compare the two kids trying so hard to appear grown up (Edgar even puts on a deep voice that fools no one) and the four kids who will literally never grow up.

I also called this a tragedy, at least as far as the boys are concerned. What else could it be, being a horror movie, but you watch scenes like the bike ride and it's fun and exciting and you understand what Schumacher is going for. They're alive and living in the moment, free in the way only kids seem to be. As you learn what they are, you realize that, for them, at least, this freedom is forever. Life will always be one big party going from one thrill to the next. The tag line is literally "never grow old, never die." And only one of those is true by the end of the movie. The gut punch about David's death (aside from the fact that he dies at all, what can I say, I'm obsessed with him) is that he doesn't go out like the others do, with blood and melting flesh and explosions. He just...dies, as that child choir kicks in one last time, and you see him for what he always was--a dead kid.

In conversation with tragedy is the theme of monsterhood as a whole. When Michael is faced with the reality of what his new friends are and what he himself is becoming, David has this to say: "You'll never grow old, Michael, and you'll never die. But you must feed." Spoken after the vampires have slaughtered half a dozen beach bums, we have the cost of immortality underlined for us. We've also seen Michael struggle against his new nature when he nearly attacked his own brother earlier in the movie, and it's not like he chose to go after Sam because he's evil. It's instinct. Hunger. A matter of survival. We see him alternatively warning Sam to stay away from him and pleading for help to stop what's happening to him because he doesn't want to become a monster, a killer like David. And that's what makes David and the rest of the boys the antagonists, because their survival depends on killing and feeding on other people, but that's all they're doing, is surviving according to their nature. That's the tragedy of monsterhood.

Along with the realization that someone had to have done that to these kids. Someone chose to make them what they are, and that's the real evil of the story.

And speaking of Max, I appreciate the fake-out approach to revealing him as the real Big Bad. It's very Scream, where you were pretty sure it was Billy the whole time but there was that one scene that threw a temporary wrench in your theory. But Star's line about Max being a secret David was protecting comes out of nowhere in a way that feels like there was a bit more context for it initially, but it never made the final cut.

Which leads me to my other gripe. The pacing and timeline don't seem to be in obvious cooperation. Again, it feels like more was there at one point, but transitional scenes were left out, so it's hard to tell how much time passes between the Emersons moving to Santa Carla and the final showdown. Things could either happen very quickly in which case the escalation is on a level with Romeo and Juliet, or it's more spaced out and the space isn't apparent. And I'm leaning towards the "spaced out" approach.

Now. Allow me a few more indulgent moments, because we gotta talk about David.

Look at him.

LOOK AGAIN.

Istg, he stepped around the bend of that merry-go-round and I said, out loud, with words, "oh shit." I had a crisis for days afterward due to the gender envy. I STILL don't know if I want him or if I want to be him. (I'm too fond of my hair as it is to even think about whether or not I'm brave enough for a bleached mullet, so at least I don't really have to think too hard about the answer.) All this to say, can you really blame Michael? One look at this guy and I didn't know what kind of egg joke I wanted to make, so I'm not surprised our boy Mike was trying so hard to fit into this group.

(Yes, you're correct, I'm circling back to my opening statement.)

You can read this as straight up, pun slightly intended, guys being dudes and Michael just wanting to be accepted by the local cool kids. Makes sense, really. They are cool. He's the new kid in town, and that folds right into the usual coming of age narrative with finding your place in the world along with discovering your own identity, etc etc. But if that's the case, then why all the long, frequent, intense eye contact?

@verified-villain-fxcker gets it. 🥂

Look, I'm sure if you tried hard enough to find a heterosexual explanation for the homoerotic tension I'm seeing, you could. But you're on this site, browsing the tag for this movie, so do you really want to? I've got a whole thesis statement on how Schumacher being a gay man/identity influencing one's art/motorcycle clubs being part of queer culture rattling around somewhere in my head, but to keep mostly on topic, I'm sticking with this: part of the coming of age story is discovering your identity, which includes your sexuality. Therefore, it's hardly a stretch to say this is a movie about gay awakening as much as anything else and that Michael Emerson is a disaster bisexual. Of course I'm not the first person to see it that way, but Pride Month is almost over. What else was I going to end on?

He's queer, your honor. Happy Pride. 🏳️‍🌈

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Snailspace

Debut: Yo-Kai Watch 3

Wow. A regular, cartoon snail, huh? No frills, nothing? There is no clever concept on display here. I mean, a snail itself is a clever concept! A squishy, vulnerable creature that carries its own armor to retract into? That's awesome! But Yo-Kai Watch 3 did not make this concept. Animals made this concept. This is pretty much nothing but a cartoon snail.

And I love those!!! Yippee!!! You're telling me this monster collecting game lets me befriend a regular cartoon snail and train it to be a STRONG snail? And lets it follow me around town wherever I go? And lets me PLAY as it? Yowza! There must be a catch here... but there isn't!

Perhaps I am just very easy to impress in some regards, but I am very happy that Snailspace is JUST a snail, with no funny business going on. Nothing to detract from it. I can't think of an example of something that would detract. I'm tired. But Snailspace is perfect the way it is, is what I'm saying. ESPECIALLY because it has eyestalks! My favorite feature on a creature!

I would like to talk about a different collectible snail monster for a moment. Hello Magcargo! You are a wonderful snail monster! A snail made of lava with a rock shell is an extremely awesome concept, and executed well! Magcargo even has big drippy mouth drips, reminiscent of a gastropod's tentacles! But it just doesn't have eyestalks, and to me, that is a very big deal. Magcargo's face looks like a frog's, and I love frogs, we all do, but this is a snail monster! I just always think that an animal-based design should take advantage of the unique features of the animal.

In fact, I once did this little edit of Magcargo's original sprite to give it eyestalks, and I instantly love it so much more! Eye positioning does so much for a design's overall personality! Eyestalks are really just one of the coolest anatomical features a creature can have, and I don't know why, so often, they will be completely ignored in fictional snail designs, inevitably making the design LESS striking than it would otherwise be. I know not all snails in real life have eyestalks, of course, but they are really such an iconic feature, absolutely perfect for exaggerating in a design.

Maybe it's not fair to spend so much of Snailspace's post talking about a different, much more known snail monster. There is stuff to love about Snailspace itself! I love its sleepy eyelids, I love its weird tall mouth, I love its color scheme! I guess it's not just ANY cartoon snail. You know... maybe there's not a such thing as just a cartoon snail. Whether intentional or not, any given person drawing a snail will put their own spin on it, however subtle. And isn't that wonderful? No one draws a snail quite like you do!

If you are not familiar with Yo-Kai Watch, I would like to delight you with some Funny Facts. Firstly, Yo-Kai are organized into "tribes" that each tend to excel in certain battle attributes. Snailspace is a member of my favorite tribe, which is Slippery! A whole official category of slimy and/or wiggly creatures! Snailspace is right at home with snakes, fish, frogs, bananas, and even a bungee jumping teapot!

Snailspace is also classified as a 'Merican Yo-Kai. The third game features the protagonist moving from Japan to America, and meeting American Yo-Kai! The localization, however, had previously tried to convince he had been in America the whole time. How did they get around this? Instead of moving overseas to the USA, he moves further south to a different region, called BBQ! It is so stupid. I love it.

'Merican Yo-Kai are a weird category. Sometimes they're based on American stereotypes, but often it feels kind of like a meaningless title. I don't know why a Snail is specifically an American concept. I mean, I have certainly encountered many snails in America! I guess they're not wrong! But not every 'Merican Yo-Kai can be as iconic for the role as, for example, a baseball-playing chicken nugget.

Anyway, Snailspace is an excellent snail! It does not take much for a snail to make me smile! I hope this is true for you, too! Have you looked at a snail lately? Check under your local rocks in the dirt and maybe you just might find a marvelous mollusk to behold!

[unfairguy]

Dude I love Max Design Pro like this isn't funny.

(Little to no punctuation warning)

I really like it because I mean first of all they actually acknowledge and interact and generally care about their fanbase unlike most of not all content farm/brainrot channels like I love seeing the little fanarts in their videos or on their community posts like they even acknowledged the fanart of their younger viewers like holy shit that's so fucking cute and not to mention how they made Twiddlefinger somewhat canon and made Oxaya canon and made Triflethumb somehwt canon and just the fact that they're super nice and chill with everyone like it's only a matter of time before Max x Nugget is canon (whoch if it doesn't become canon at some point then I'm gonna lose my shit) I don't know why I ever judged them in the first place and frankly I'm happy that I was dragged into the fandom because it's genuinely super awesome and cool OH and not to mention I can see how they're starting to shift their content from stuff drooling babies would watch to more mature-ish themes (I mean they were talking about smoking and attempted murder and stuff and included a scene where Jimmy was about to get his head chopped off) and they usually include like little lessons and such like smoking while pregnant or not killing every creature you're scared of (like spiders for example in that one short) and even letting those who need a specific seat to yk take that seat like okay fine yeah it's still content farm but their characters actually have lore and personality instead of it being the same thing every single time

You read everything? Great, now count how many times I said the word "like" (excluding this sentence).

[honey-minded-hivemind]

X Men Evolution. Yandere Lance with little sister reader who has the ability to control air.

Aaaaawwwww! Siblings! Let's see if we can't give the rock guy a sibling! (I do gender-neutral Reader). Let's give you something good:

Being in the foster care system was tough.

It made Lance a rougher, harder person, hard to break and tough to crack. His powers only made him stronger, able to cause earthquakes and control the rocks underfoot. But he did have a soft spot for one person:

You.

You were his little sibling, his good luck charm, his Blarney Stone, the one person who could make him feel better with no effort at all. Just look at you:

You were perfect.

Not to mention your powers complimented his.

Air manipulation. The ability to control the air and use its full force, creating strong gusts of wind, cool breezes in the heat, and a powerful current capable of toppling someone thrice your size over.

Wind wears down rock, rock stands through wind, erosion and sediment and all of that.

Point was, you were the (literal) winds beneath his (figurative) wings. Where he went, you came with, and wherever you went, he wasn't far to follow.

That being said-

He hated having to share you with others.

The Brotherhood was okay. Not great, but a lot better than other places. He was more or less the leader, and the others (eventually, if not immediately) followed orders. They could fun to hang out with, each with their own unique gifts and talents (usually causing chaos with them). They were pretty alright with him.

Except for right now, when they were hogging you from him.

"C'mon, Lance. They're sweet as pie! Plus they say they can make it!" Fred told him, while Pietro was talking a mile a minute with you.

"Yo, man, they're a good one. Why can't we hang out with them more? Aren't we their friends too?" Toad wheedles, sitting atop his perch on Fred's shoulder. He almost acts like a parrot, or hawk, or some bird that isn't far from its falconry friend.

"And you've bothered them enough. Reader, come on! We're taking a ride somewhere!" Lance calls, and that catches his little sibling's attention, while earning him an annoyed look from Pietro. Yeah, look, he gets it, his sibling is awesome and listens to everyone and tries to be inclusive. But they're HIS sibling, and that means HE should be able to hang out with them without the others stealing them away every five minutes.

"Okay! Where're we going, Lance-a-lot?" you ask, using the nickname you gave him. The other teens snicker, until you turn and give them a sharp look. "Stop laughing! NOW!" The air in the room goes freezing cold, blasting sharply at them, earning a small shriek from Toad and Pietro. "Hmph!"

"Good job, squirt. You're my dragon in shining scales," Lance praises gently, and the Teo of you leave to head to his Jeep. "Oh, and guys? They're my sibling."

That earns a few shocked looks as well as questions, but the two of them are out the door and soon sitting in the old Jeep, picking out a destination. "So, what's it gonna be, squirt? Where do you wanna go?" he asks, giving his sibling a soft smile.

"McDonalds!" you cheer, a wide grin on your face. "That way we can share the chicken nuggets!"

"Okay, to McDonalds!"

Man, he loved being your brother...

"Hey, Lance, hey, kid. Can we get slushies?"

"AH!"

"Oh, hi Wanda!"

Well, at least it's just Wanda...

Wait...

"How did you get in my Jeep?!"

"I slept in here."

"..."

"..."

"Can we still get McDonalds?"

He sighs.

"Yeah, we can still get McDonald's."

"Oh yeah, man, can we come too?"

"WHY ARE YOU HERE?!"

"Stops screaming Lance and drive," Pietro orders from the back.

"Yeah, Lance! They have Ty Beanie Babies in their Happy Meals!"

... Well, at least he gets to spend SOME time with his sibling... Plus his friends. At least he doesn't have to fight the X-Teens over them...

[turtles-allthewaydown]

"You followed me in here just to ask — not now, Nuggets." Fat Nuggets noses at his ankle again. Angel sighs and turns away from Alastor. The radio demon watches intently as Angel Dust bows to the whims of a twenty-pound pig and pours a bowl of kibble. "Are you really askin' why I get high?" He looks up from Nuggets, now happily chomping away at his dinner.

Alastor leans on his cane and inclines his head. "I suppose I am."

"Al, that's the stupidest question I've ever heard. Getting high feels awesome. Not getting high sucks."

A crackle of static. "It killed you."

"Yeah, it did."

---

Chapter 5 of Late Night Devil (Put Your Hands On Me) is on AO3 now! Featuring Alastor (accidentally? on purpose?) reminding Angel why he wants to get sober, Lucifer doesn't want to be Angel's sugar daddy, and telling Val to fuck off.

This chapter brings us up through the end of episode 6. I expect only one more chapter to go, maybe an epilogue. If you're enjoying this fic, please comment and let me know, I love talking to you all!

CW: drug and alcohol abuse, addiction & recovery, physical abuse, sexual abuse (mostly implied), mention of dubiously consensual drug use (Val's pheromones), mention of overdose, mention of torture (waterboarding). Everything is canon-typical levels of sex/violence/drugs.