#you wondered why I felt used and like I was just trash to you? well this is part of the reason why honey
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insanechayne · 1 year ago
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#so I guess you just weren’t going to talk to me yesterday#I don’t know if it’s because you’re still mad at me or because you just ‘didn’t have time’ to send any more messages#but in any case I spent my whole day basically just sitting here refreshing my messages waiting for you like I always do just to get nothing#this is why I tried to bring up to you that our lack of contact lately was bothering me and making me feel like I did something wrong#this is why I tried to propose a solution of agreeing not to talk every single day to make things easier on both of us#a solution which you completely ignored and refused to acknowledge when you snapped at me#you say you hate having to justify yourself and don’t even realize that I was never asking you to do so#but having to beg you for time and being made to feel like I’m having to chase you down in this friendship isn’t exactly fun or healthy#I’ve let you dictate pretty much every facet of our relationship and conceded so much because I can’t bear to lose you#I can’t even defend myself properly because the second you snap at me and show me you’re upset I just crumble and do whatever you want#I’m constantly apologizing for everything I say and do#and I’m made to feel like I’m being selfish and manipulative just because I want to be able to talk to my friend a little more often#you wondered why I felt used and like I was just trash to you? well this is part of the reason why honey#you treat me like I’m disposable and like my worries and feelings don’t matter#but anyway it just hurts to realize that for whatever reason you never planned on talking to me again yesterday#personal
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suiana · 4 days ago
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(yandere! bully victim x gn! bully reader) (cw: erm... yandere stuff, body horror or whatever its called idk bruh, he kinda carves his name into ur skin but its not mentioned in detail)
"how does it feel to be on the receiving end now, huh?"
you shiver, letting out a strained sound as you trash on the table.
"pluh- mn!"
"what was that? you've got to be clearer with your words, my dear. how do you expect me to understand muffles?"
the male hums, his cold hands dancing across your body. you could only shiver yet again, unable to do anything but remain binded to the table.
"oh, sorry, i forgot you couldn't speak. haha, how silly of me."
yeah, how silly of him to completely gag you so you couldn't speak. how completely silly of him to tie you to some cold table, restraining all your movements so that you couldn't fight back against him. how absolutely whimsical for him to be recording all your grunts, groans, and whines while you were completely restrained.
well, you suppose it's a bit ironic. considering that you were the one doing it to him when the both of you were younger. albeit not on this level.
you wonder if this was how he felt. vulnerable, naked, defenseless.
it happened so long ago, but the wounds you inflicted on him were still fresh. no matter how hard you try apologizing, his scars still bleed warm.
you shouldn't have been mean to him. you really shouldn't. especially when he was so much nicer back then.
"mn... you have no idea how much I've wanted to do this. it really makes me happy to see you so..."
he pauses, eyes raking over your form that was tied down to his table.
"so weak."
we've all watched the movies where the bully gets put in place and completely punished. you used to laugh at those films. i mean, how could the bully even be so stupid to get karma for their actions? couldn't they have hid better? tried making up for it? why did they have to go through the consequences of their actions? what idiots!
but now that it's happening to you, you wish you hadn't said those words.
the second you found out that your ex-victim was your boss, you couldn't even as much as utter a word. no, you felt like you were about to have a mental breakdown. especially because you were now his secretary, working for him.
"come on, what happened to that big, scary, and mean ol' bully that i knew? the one that used to pour water over my head and have their friends restrain me?"
his words have a hunt of condescension- no, they were fully condescending. he was mocking you right now. mocking you for your stupidity, mocking you for your actions. and he was absolutely taking pleasure in seeing you in such a weak and reduced state. a shell of the person you once were.
you couldn't do anything but to take it like the loser you were.
"haha, look at you. all tied down and gagged like the dog you are. why don't you bark for me? maybe I'll be nicer if you act like a stupid bitch in heat."
he laughs, hands resting on your clothed abdomen. his hair falls over his eyes, the usual up kept man looking like a mess as he continues to taunt you.
"you know, when i confessed to liking you, i never expected you to bully me. seriously. i thought you'd be like, I don't know, nice about it. if you were nice I don't think I'd have stalked you and do all this. would've courted you normally until you accepted. I'm a patient guy after all."
the words that come out of his mouth have just the tiniest bit of sadness in them. however, it's completely squashed down by the sharp look in his eyes.
"had i known you'd be such an ass about it... I'd have just taken you for myself right there and then. who cares about having a normal relationship, right? as long as you're with me, it's all that matters."
right, like what he was doing right now. ever since you started working for him he's been constantly... acting like he was your boyfriend rather than your boss. constantly giving you gifts, telling you that it was okay that you bullied him because he knows you're just shy and that he'll make things right... the worst part was when he forbid you from interacting with others.
it was fucking creepy.
things were only worsened when he found you on a night out at a bar, flirting with some random stranger. you had wanted to let loose and relieve some stress but it looks like karma loved to see you suffer.
"what are you doing? are you cheating on me?"
what the fuck?! you stare at your boss in horror, freezing in place. quickly turning back to the stranger you were flirting with, you shake your head and apologize, explaining that your boss was just a little weird. why the hell is he even here?!
"look, I'm sorry but he's a bit of a creep and-"
"my darling, i think it's time we go back home. you've had one too many drinks."
that experience was only the start of an even worser time. one that led him to declare to the whole damn world that you were now his in a fit of anger and mania. i mean, he practically has you locked in his house now. and it wasn't even illegal since you agreed to come.
he had called you to sort out some paperwork or whatever and you being his secretary... you couldn't refuse even if you wanted to. so you made your way to his house, all naive and ignorant of what was to come the second he opened those doors to that luxurious mansion of his.
you passed out and the next thing you knew, you were restrained to the table, gagged and staring at him with a half lidded look in your eyes.
god damn it, you should've known better than to believe this crazy guy's words. why would you willingly go to his place where there'd be no one but you two? ugh, stupid, stupid, stupid.
and now you could only express how terrified you were with your eyes and shivering body.
"how cute. how seriously cute. I've always wanted to see you look at me with that expression."
he coos, lips stretched into a smirk as he leans down to your face. his breath hits your skin, cold hands trailing up your chest and to your jaw before he grips hard.
"you're mine. it wasn't clear when i was just a boy but you've always been mine. since the day i let you bullied me, and even right now, I've made it clear. you're mine, and always will be mine."
he's right, you've always been his. why else would this rich and obviously powerful guy just let you bully him? he could've had you gone the second you made a move on him but instead...
"i still remember the slaps and bruises you left on me. ah... you were so cute back then. hitting me like that. should've scarred me too, maybe then I'd see your horrified face whenever i flashed it."
a sadist. you're sure that he's some sort of sadistic masochist.
"oh well, it's no matter. I've done that job for you."
he pulls away, unbuttoning his shirt to reveal his bare upper body to you. to say that you were completely terrified would be an understatement. because why the hell was your first name (and his last name btw) painfully carved into his other flawless skin? right above his heart, no less!
"isn't it beautiful? you're forever with me now."
his words send a chill down your body. what the hell, you don't want to be with him at all! and it looks like he sensed that but chose to ignore your feelings.
your boss smiles at you before pulling out a small blade from his pants.
oh hell nah.
"it's your turn, darling."
no no no, you don't like where this is going. your body trashes violently against the cold hard table he had you strapped in, pupils blown wide as adrenaline fills your veins.
"mgh! mf!"
"hey hey, quiet down. it's only fair that i get to do it to you, right? consider this my payback. you had your fun and now I'm having mine."
no! shit shit shit, what are you supposed to do?!
you try shaking your head, sweat forming on your skin as your breath grows laboured. your body continues to trash against the bindings, but it looks like the bindings were done just a little too well.
"hm... should i do it somewhere visible? or maybe... right where your heart would be?"
you shake violently, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes.
"nh! mh!"
"aw, is my little darling about to cry? that's so cute. go on, cry for me. cry for me just like i cried for you."
tears fall down your cheeks as he trails the vlade over your clothes. the sharpness of the item has you shivering, cold dread creeping up your spine at the very thought of that anywhere on your skin.
"hm... since you look so scared, I'll carve my initials instead of my full name. how about that? a good offer if i say so myself."
if you could speak, you'd be cursing and begging him to stop. unfortunately that wasn't the case and your boss took your lack of words as the green light.
"don't worry, I'll kiss your pain away afterwards. it'll be over before you know it."
oh god damn it, you really should've just politely rejected him when he confessed.
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cherienymphe · 11 months ago
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Teenage Dirtbag II (JJ Maybank x Reader x Rafe Cameron)
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Warnings: NON-CON, DUB-CON, abusive relationship, domestic violence, violence (+ gun violence), gun kink, dacryphilia, attempted murder, mentions of blood, public sex, jealousy, manipulation, infidelity, underage drinking, drug use, canon ages, kook!reader
➥ banner by @vase-of-lilies | ➥ divider by @firefly-graphics
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➥ series masterlist
summary: You’re charmingly spoiled. You’re too kind for your own good. You’re the princess of Figure 8 …and you’re way out of JJ Maybank’s league, but when he realizes that Rafe Cameron’s pride and joy is actually a bruised and battered damsel, he’s determined to save you.
Your rescue just comes with a price.
~
“Why was JJ even trying to give you some drink, anyway?”
You resisted the urge to sigh, anticipating such a question the moment the topic had swung back around to the party from last week. You kept your gaze on your lip gloss, dipping it once then twice before looking up into the mirror. You could hear Rafe pause in his movements, no doubt waiting for an answer, and this time you finally did heave a breath.
“I don’t know, Rafe. I told you this,” you said to him, turning to look at him as he sat on the edge of his bed.
You watched him study you, that blue gaze of his oh so unnerving, and you weren’t the least bit relieved when he simply hummed.
“I know,” he finally replied, tongue pressing to the inside of his cheek. “…but I have a right to wonder. Especially since you’ve never spoken to him a day in your life before that night.”
Rolling your eyes, you turned to swipe the sticky product over your lips, recalling that it was one of Rafe’s favorite shades. The conversation had the potential to slip into dangerous territory, derailing your entire night, and you mulled over your next words carefully.
“He was probably just trying to get a rise out of you,” you honestly murmured, looking at your boyfriend. “…and it worked.”
You merely shrugged at him as he scoffed.
“I mean, he’s way more familiar with you than me. Probably just wanted to piss you off.”
You turned the light off in his bathroom, making your way towards your shoes as you desperately hoped this conversation would come to an end soon. The topic of other men was one that rarely ended nonviolently, and you didn’t know how Rafe got it into his head that the antics of JJ Maybank had anything to do with you when everyone on this entire island knew how much they hated each other. A year ago, you barely even knew the other blonde’s name.
“Well, it worked,” Rafe confessed, coming over to help you put on your other shoe. “You’re too good to even be talking to trash like that, so yeah. It pissed me off.”
At the look on your face, Rafe continued, shaking his head.
“I know what you’re thinking, and you really don’t need to go around feeling sorry for guys like that. He’s not the down on his luck kid you think he is,” he advised, pulling you to your feet. “Him and all of Sarah’s little buddies are nothing but trouble.”
Rafe took his time telling you this, making sure you heard every word, and you only felt compelled to nod as he placed a brief kiss on your lips. Rafe swiped up your purse for you as he pulled you out of the room. You felt safer with Rafe in his house than you did in your own, but Ward’s careful eye on his son had never been foolproof. There’d been plenty of times Rafe gave you a sprained wrist or bruised jaw in his very own bedroom.
It's just that in his desire to be more careful within the Cameron household, he sometimes decided that it wasn’t even worth it.
“Where are you two off to?” Sarah wondered as you came face to face with her in the living room.
You hadn’t even known she was home, and when it became clear that Rafe wasn’t going to answer her, you did.
“To a movie.”
The smile you sent her was small, and she reluctantly returned it before settling her gaze on her brother. You didn’t miss the way her eyes narrowed, lips pursing a tad. They never got along, but considering recent events, you knew what this particular disagreement was about to be about.
“JJ’s nose is still pretty messed up, you know.”
At that, Rafe did finally acknowledge her, stopping to face her with a challenging look you knew all too well. He tilted his head to the side, one brow raised.
“That sounds like something that isn’t my problem,” he shrugged, and you softly told him that you needed to go in an attempt to avoid whatever this was, but he ignored you.
“God, you’re such an asshole, you know that? JJ just offered your girlfriend a drink and so you broke his nose? Yeah, ‘cause that makes sense,” Sarah murmured, shaking her head as she looked back down at her phone.
You squeezed Rafe’s arm, but he merely sneered at his sister.
“JJ’s a little shit who likes to look for trouble wherever he goes. Not my fault he found it,” Rafe spat, pulling you along before Sarah could reply.
His quiet disposition and tight grip on your hand told you how annoyed he was at Sarah’s reminder of JJ and that night, and you mentally wondered if this was going to be a little thing or something that affected your whole night. Maybe even the next one too. He said nothing when he helped you into his truck, and so you were unsurprised that he was quiet his whole way to the movie too.
You were thankful this was the date of choice because it was easier to ignore Rafe’s mood when your eyes were glued to the screen. In fact, there were moments you forgot he was even there, giggling to whatever was going on in front of you. Once the movie was over, however, Rafe’s uncharacteristic silence was hard to ignore.
Knowing that you’d regret it, you finally spoke up when you made it back to his truck.
“I feel like you’re mad at me for some reason.”
It sounded silly to your ears, but then again, you knew your boyfriend like the back of your hand, and as little sense as it made, you had the sneaking suspicion that he put some blame with you somehow.
“Not mad,” he murmured, and you simply looked at him.
His gaze and the tightness in his jaw said otherwise, and despite his evident annoyance, he still claimed otherwise. He was silent as he opened your door—his irritation growing the longer you stared at him—and when he blinked, straightening, you finally slid inside. You weren’t surprised to have the door slammed in your face, and you could only sigh when he joined you.
The first few minutes of the drive were as quiet as before, but when Rafe finally cracked, you could only close your eyes.
“Why did you even want to go that night, anyway?” he bitterly chuckled.
You turned to look out of the window with a defeated heave of your shoulders, swallowing.
“You’ve never wanted to go before, and even then, some bonfire on the beach isn’t your thing. You go to house parties with pools and prissy bitches who don’t want to get their hair wet,” he sneered, making you look at him. “Yeah, JJ might’ve wanted to piss me off, but it was you he chose to do it through.”
“So…what…? It’s my fault? I should’ve never gone with you, is that what you’re saying?”
You frowned at him when he glanced at you, dirty blond hair kissing his forehead, and Rafe’s silence spoke volumes. Against your will, you felt your throat tightening, and you were unsurprised when tears kissed your eyes. You hated crying in front of Rafe.
“I just wanted to go, Rafe. I’d never been, and…it’s not like I have any friends to go with anymore. Would you have rather I’d gone alone?”
“Don’t be cute,” he threw at you, tossing you a scathing look. “You wouldn’t even get the chance to try.”
You huffed, looking away from him as he continued, watching the trees fly by.
“Besides, I thought we both agreed that your friends were catty airheads who you didn’t need to be around,” Rafe firmly said. “You have better friends, now.”
“Those are your friends,” you sighed. “…and I know because they barely talk to me. I’m just your girlfriend who’s supposed to stand there and look pretty.”
Those last words came out in a murmur, but Rafe heard them loud and clear.
“You’d have nothing to complain about if you didn’t ask to go in the first place.”
His words made your frown deepen, and despite what you wanted, a few tears escaped. You looked at him in disbelief, although, you didn’t know why. You should’ve been perfectly used to the words that came out of his mouth, sometimes, now.
“What am I supposed to do, Rafe?” you cried. “Just sit in my room, twiddling my thumbs until you come back?”
When he looked at you, he rolled those blue eyes of his, a scoff leaving his perfect lips.
“I don’t have time for the antics, tonight,” he breathed.
Now, it was your turn to scoff.
“You started it,” you pointed out.
You knew that you were already on thin ice, you could tell, but when Rafe cut his eyes back to you, your heart skipped a beat. You watched your boyfriend swipe his tongue between his lips, slowly nodding as he looked back at the road.
“Okay…” the truck started to slow as he inhaled. “Yeah, okay.”
You felt the hairs on your arms stand on end as he stopped in the middle of the road. It was late, so it wasn’t like the roads of Kildare County were littered with traffic, but it still made you nervous, nonetheless. You watched Rafe turn the truck off, and before you could say anything he was looking at you.
“Get out.”
His words made you blink, lips parting before snapping them shut.
“…what?”
One of Rafe’s arms leaned on the steering wheel while his other hand rested behind your headrest. Even in the darkness, there was a glint in his eyes that told you he was completely serious despite the insanity of the request. The atmosphere in the truck felt so tense—thick with it—and you pulled your lip between your teeth when Rafe leaned in, gaze cold and mocking.
“You said I started it? Well, now I’m finishing it. Get the fuck out of my truck,” Rafe quietly spat at you, making you flinch.
An incredulous bark of a laugh escaped you.
“Rafe, it’s the middle of the night, are you crazy?”
At your refusal to do what he asked, he merely turned away, opening his door. Your heart fell to your stomach as you watched him hurry to your side, yanking the door open and proceeding to yank you too.
“Rafe! What the hell-?”
Your words were cut off as you were forced to stumble out of the vehicle and into the road—without your purse. When he roughly shoved you away, you tripped over your own feet, hissing in pain as you barely caught yourself on your hands. Rafe was already back in his truck by the time you pushed yourself to your feet, and in shock, you watched him start it up. You’d only just reached the handle of the door when he sped off, and you screamed his name after him in a mix of fear and anger.
You couldn’t even really focus on the knowledge that you were in the middle of an empty stretch of road in the middle of the night. You were too angry and annoyed to, and with a sob, you pressed your face into your hands. You sniffed, wiping your face before wrapping your arms around yourself and looking around.
You knew that trying to go toe to toe with Rafe even just a little could prove to be disastrous. You just desperately wanted him to understand that all you had was him. With no friends and no social life outside of him, Rafe was all you had, and you weren’t the bad guy for simply wanting to go to a party with him. You knew he knew this though, so you didn’t even know why you bothered, but you just hated to be blamed for something JJ Maybank did solely because he and Rafe hated each other.
You were merely a tool in the incident.
Rafe was so childish sometimes, so this little display of anger shouldn’t have surprised you. Even still, your nerves were on end as you started to walk down the road. Like you’d thought earlier, there was no traffic in sight, and truthfully, nothing in Outer Banks was that far from anything else, but that didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things.
You wiped your face again, but fresh tears just fell.
It was cold, and while your jacket kept you from shaking, this still wasn’t the kind of weather to be walking down the street in. You couldn’t stop crying no matter how much you tried, debating with yourself if you wanted to just keep walking towards your house or try your chances with getting sympathy from some stranger. You knew what Rafe would prefer—and you knew what was statistically safer—but something in you wanted to piss him off further.
After all, he was the one who threw a tantrum and put you out on the side of the road in the middle of the night. Something in you was desperate to teach him a lesson, and you genuinely wondered what Rafe would do if you just…never came home. You wanted to see the look on his face when your parents called him asking if he’d seen you. However, something in you told you that he wouldn’t be as stricken as you’d think.
This was the same man who threatened to kill you on several occasions.
…but that was different.
That had always been when you tried to leave or even made him think you would leave. That was always said as a promise to make you stay, and even worse, that was when your demise would be at his hands. Rafe wouldn’t get the same satisfaction from leaving you to the mercy of the elements and strangers in the middle of the night.
You were just wiping more tears away when you could see headlights coming from the other end of the road. You weren’t on that side, so you weren’t all that concerned, and despite your earlier bleak thoughts, you actually didn’t relish getting in some stranger’s car and hoping he was honest enough to just take you where you needed to go.
However, your heart did sink a little when it became clear the vehicle was slowing down.
…but your worry morphed into irritation when you recognized the truck.
Rolling your eyes, you merely kept walking as Rafe slowed down enough to have a conversation with you. Or at least attempt to, anyway. You didn’t look at him, swallowing and keeping your tearful eyes straight ahead as you walked.
“Baby, get in the truck.”
“Why?” you wondered with a shrug. “You’re the one who kicked me out.”
“I don’t have time for this,” you heard him mumble. “Y/N, get in the truck.”
Against your better judgement, you ignored him, and Rafe stopped reversing to put the vehicle in park. You picked up your pace when you heard his door open, but Rafe was faster, and you could only attempt to pull away when he roughly grabbed your arm. Yanking you towards him, Rafe didn’t hesitate to push you against the side of the truck, making you wince.
His hold was so tight on your arm, and you shrank away from him when he pressed his nose to yours. His chest and shoulders were heaving, so you knew that he was beyond annoyed, now, but the stubborn part of you that reared its ugly head sometimes only stared back at him with trembling lips.
“I really don’t have time for this, tonight,” he whispered. “Get in the fucking truck, so we can go home.”
“You kicked me out! You go home…and I’ll just walk,” you tearfully spat, attempting to get out of his hold. “It’s what you wanted, anyway.”
Rafe’s impatience was bleeding through as you tried to get past him. One of his arms secured itself around your waist, the other gripping your arm as you attempted to grab that one. You were a mess of limbs and tears as you begged him to let go of you, Rafe’s low voice telling you to get it together.
You weren’t surprised when you found yourself harshly thrown to the ground.
You cried out when your chin bounced off of the pavement, unable to stop your fast descent in time. You heard Rafe curse from above you as a loud sob escaped, and you reached up to touch your chin, attempting to push yourself up. Rafe—in his haste—beat you to it though, grabbing you and forcing you to your feet. You could feel wetness on your chin as he forced you to the passenger side, quite literally shoving you into the truck.
You flinched when he slammed the door shut, tearful gaze focused on the glove compartment as he angrily joined you. When he told you to put on your seatbelt, you reluctantly did with trembling fingers, a choked cough escaping as you tried to stop crying. You couldn’t.
Rafe didn’t say a word to you the whole way back to his house, but you could feel his gaze on you every now and then. He didn’t turn on the radio, the only sound in the vehicle was that of your harsh wails. When he finally did stop in his yard, you both sat there for some time before a long sigh reached your ears.
“You know how I get,” you eventually heard him say. “You know I wouldn’t just…leave you out there.”
You didn’t say anything because you had nothing to say. You heard him shift, and you flinched again when the tips of his fingers grazed your face, his other hand coming up to gently take your chin. Turning you to face him, you watched his blue eyes roam over your face, taking in your tearful cheeks and bloody chin.
“I’m sorry.”
Not only was it something you’d heard a million times before, but you also knew that it was solely in reference to your face. Rafe wasn’t apologizing for kicking you out on the side of the road in the middle of the night. Why would he apologize for that when he felt that was justified? When you said nothing in response, he opted for getting out, and when he opened your door, you hesitated before taking his offered hand.
Once you were standing before him, he wrapped an arm around you, pulling you against him. You felt him press his lips into your hair, deeply inhaling. He quietly apologized again, and his words hung in the air as you knew what he wanted. Sniffling, you nodded.
“It’s okay,” you whispered. “It was an accident.”
It wasn’t…because even if Rafe hadn’t explicitly tried to make you bleed, he had intended to hurt you. In these moments, in the aftermath of whatever else Rafe did, it was so easy to think to yourself that you’d leave him. It was almost too easy to hype yourself up, but then you’d think about how it felt to be on the receiving end of that emotionless stare, dead eyes gazing back at you. You’d think about the fear you’d feel whenever his hand was round your neck.
…or the feel of the barrel of a gun in your mouth.
It was so easy until you remembered that Rafe would actually kill you, and you’d learned a long time ago that Rafe wasn’t one to bluff.
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You were making something to eat when you heard someone coming down the stairs, and when you glanced up, you weren’t surprised to make eye contact with Sarah. You knew she was home, and you’d heard her friends downstairs not too long ago. You surmised that they were outside waiting for her judging by her state of undress.
“Oh,” she said, sounding a little startled to see you. “I didn’t know you were still here. Where’s Rafe?”
She glanced towards the stairs, and you confirmed her suspicions that he was indeed gone.
“He went to the club with Kelce and Topper.”
You gave her a shrug, answering her silent question.
“I didn’t really feel like going.”
It wasn’t a lie, but you also knew that even if you did feel like going, it probably wouldn’t have gone over well. The last time you went to the country club with Rafe, it didn’t exactly end the best. Running into some of his more casual friends had apparently sparked a conversation that you unfortunately bore the brunt of. It amazed you, really, how Rafe wanted both an attractive girlfriend his friends could envy him for while also losing his mind if said friends dared to say it.
“Oh,” she said again, a little more dejected this time.
Your attention was focused on your food, so you didn’t even realize Sarah was still lingering about until she spoke again.
“We’re going to the beach,” she suddenly blurted out, and you’d guessed as much at the sight of her bikini top. “You should come with us.”
At that you paused, giving her a questionable look that conveyed exactly what you were thinking. Sarah sighed, dropping her bag to the floor before nearing you with a roll of her eyes.
“I know that we’re not friends,” she slowly started, scrunching her face. “…but you’ve been dating my brother for like, what, two years?”
You glanced down at that.
“…and…I know it’s not my place, but you just seem lonely sometimes,” she hurried to continue when your gaze met hers. “I mean, I never really see you do anything that doesn’t involve Rafe. At least, not anymore.”
You swallowed at that.
“Come on, he’s at the stupid country club with his friends, and you’re just waiting for him to get back. Surely, you can’t like that.”
Sarah was more right than she knew, but you swallowed that down.
“I told you, Sarah, I didn’t want to go. I’m fine just hanging out here. I like being at your house,” you chuckled.
Sarah looked like she wanted to say something else but thought better of it. However, she did eye you though with a look you couldn’t place, and you sent her a reassuring smile as you grabbed your plate.
“You guys have fun,” you encouraged, touching her arm on your way past her.
You wondered how pathetic you’d become if your boyfriend’s younger sister was extending a hesitant offer of friendship. Granted, it wasn’t like she was outside your age group or anything, because she wasn’t, but the other circumstances surrounding your relationship just made it seem sad on your end. Your boyfriend’s little sister wanted to make up for how her brother treated you, and it was laughable in the worst way.
You were pulled from your thoughts by the sound of the hallway bathroom door opening, and you sharply inhaled as you almost quite literally ran into the last person you ever expected to see in the Cameron household. Now, you understood why Sarah had been worriedly eyeing the stairs as she asked if Rafe was home.
JJ Maybank looked just as startled to see you, but he recovered quicker than you did.
“Sorry,” you rushed out, breaking eye contact and moving to get past him.
You slowed when you recalled your brief glance at his face, guilt eating at you at the bruising that was still faint around the area of his nose. Briefly pressing your fingers to your forehead, you turned around, a little shocked to find the blond already staring at you. That discovery gave you pause, but you quickly pushed it aside.
“I’m sorry, by the way.”
You watched him raise his brows at you, but JJ otherwise said nothing, and so you elaborated.
“About your nose,” you told him, and JJ nodded in understanding. “Sure, you were being…a bit of a jerk, but Rafe shouldn’t have done that.”
At your words, you watched something flicker over his features, and the corner of his lips curved upwards just enough to be noticeable.
“You thought I was being an asshole,” he pointed out, and you snorted.
“I didn’t say that-.”
“…but it’s what you meant,” he slowly interrupted, stepping towards you.
You took note of the action, frowning a bit before glancing away.
You knew that Rafe would throw you down the stairs for even looking at JJ Maybank, let alone having a full-blown conversation with him, but the polite manner in which you’d been raised wouldn’t let you walk by the guy without saying anything in reference to Rafe’s behavior that night. Choosing to let the conversation die, you sighed.
“I just wanted to apologize for how he acted. That’s all.”
You gave him a strained smile before turning away, pausing when he spoke.
“You know, your boyfriend’s a bit of an asshole too.”
You tensed for half a second before turning to face him, stomach twisting at that mocking curve to his lips. Blinking, you wondered how to respond to that.
“That’s your opinion.”
“One you agree with,” he argued with a slow smile, studying your face as he pulled his lip between his teeth. “I can tell. You think he’s an asshole too. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be apologizing on his behalf.”
Maybe it was because Rafe took JJ’s actions that night out on you, but you actually felt yourself getting irritated.
“I wouldn’t have to apologize for anything if you hadn’t been trying to provoke him. We all know what he’s like, and you two don’t exactly have the best history,” you shrugged.
The other man didn’t respond right away, simply leaning against the wall with one hand shoved into his pocket. You felt a little self-conscious the longer he stared at you, doubly so when his blue gaze lowered. Having expected no one outside of immediate family to be in the house, you were only sporting one of Rafe’s shirts. It came down to your knees, but in front of JJ, you might as well had been wearing a thong.
It's how Rafe would see it, anyway.
“Is that what you do?”
At your blink of confusion, he continued.
“When he’s being…well…Rafe, do you tell yourself that’s just how he is and you know what he’s like and so you should know better?”
JJ’s words struck a nerve, more than he’d ever know, and you glanced away. You guessed that your silence was answer enough, and when you looked back to him, he was nodding to himself.
“Sounds to me like you need a better boyfriend,” he told you with an amused smile, shrugging at you.
Realizing that this conversation went far beyond what you intended, you chose not to dignify that with a response. You could still feel the heat of his gaze as you walked to Rafe’s room, and when you paused with your hand on the knob, you glanced up to catch his eye. JJ hadn’t moved, at all, simply opting to stare at you, blond hair messy in a way that Rafe’s would never be.
You recalled what Rafe said about JJ being trouble, and it was only then did you consider he might be trouble in a way you hadn’t thought about before. When the sound of Sarah’s voice traveled upstairs, JJ’s name in the air, only then did he glance over his shoulder, and you took that opportunity to lock yourself inside of your boyfriend’s room.
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after-witch · 1 year ago
Text
The Driven Snow [Yandere Coriolanus Snow x Reader]
Title: The Driven Snow [Yandere Coriolanus Snow x Reader]
Synopsis: You're a District 2 school graduate who comes to the Capitol with her father before the 11th Hunger Games. You don't expect to meet anyone kind, especially not someone named Coriolanus Snow who offers you his arm, his smile, and treats in secret. 
Word Count: 5270
notes: yandere, abusive relationship, non-graphic descriptions of torture and death (not against reader); uses a mixture of book and movie canon
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The Capitol was not as dazzling as your father described it but then, he had seen it before the war. Though perhaps it was your own bitterness that made you ignore the signs of returning prosperity that sets it above everywhere else.
The repaired elaborate buildings, the fresh pungent smell of plaster and paint. The cars pumping exhaust fumes into the air. The low rumble of garbage trucks that pick up bright green garbage cans, some of which are actually teeming with plastic trash bags. Such waste was unheard of, even in the oh-so-loyal District 2, where only the lowest of the low find themselves starving.
Although not-starving didn’t mean that everything was plentiful. 
You, though, were lucky enough to avoid the lima bean heavy diet that some of your classmates (now former--graduation was months ago) lived on. Or were you? The meat that graced your family’s dinner table, the pats of butter on toast, were all courtesy of your father’s  immense talent in building creative weapons that allowed the Capitol to stamp out every last bit of rebellion in the Districts. That allowed them to regain control. That allowed them to create the Hunger Games.
Which is why you were in the Capitol now. Oh, not to participate in them. Your father’s status in District 2 had seen to that; it would be a scandal if the name of his beloved daughter were to ever be pulled. 
You were there because your father had been given a lucrative contract, one that was sure to cement your family’s wealth for generations: a contract to build high-tech weapons for the Hunger Games themselves. 
They would still be killing. But on a much smaller scale, you supposed, than the weapons your father designed during the war. 
Still. Blood was blood. And if it had to be spilled, well, there was nothing you could do about it except hope they died quickly. Especially the ones from District 2.
Last year’s Games’ had been awful enough. Your family had watched the Games on a modest television set in the privacy of your living room, sent courtesy of the Capitol. 
You wondered if you would ever get the sight of Marcus’ battered, bloated face from your mind; if you would ever unhear the way his body thumped to the ground when that girl had killed him, out of mercy. If you would ever stop imagining what it must have felt like in those last moments.
But it wasn’t all horror. You’d liked Lucy Gray well enough, even though she was from 12. She had a wild way of dressing and the singing--it was practically theatrical, compared to what you’d heard about the previous games. 
Maybe that was why your father got this contract: theatrics. Maybe the games would be more dramatic from now on. Maybe they wanted tributes like Lucy Gray, who sang and spit and poisoned her way to Victory. It was strange, really, that there’d been hardly any talk of her since her win. 
“Father?” You asked, quietly as you could. 
Both of you were standing in the foyer of the grand university in the Capitol. The outside was still a little ravaged, but inside, it was perfectly lovely. Walls lined with books--perhaps some of them were fake--and marble floors and marble busts dotting the sight lines.
“Mm?” He replied, eyes scanning over his clipboard. He flips it, here and there.
“I was just thinking. About last year’s games. About Lucy Gray, and how the Games--”
Your father rounded on you, eyes suddenly serious and blazing.
“Quiet. Weren’t you paying attention on the way here?” Admittedly, you were not. You’d been daydreaming about what you might do now that you were done with school. There was no university in District 2, and your father hadn’t even mentioned a job. “You’re not supposed to mention--”
“Not supposed to mention whom? Ah, ah, ah. Lucy Gray Baird?” called a voice, almost in sing-song.
Your father stood up stiff, and the life seemed to drain from his face.
Both of you look towards the sound of the voice, and now it’s your turn to stiffen. The voice came from a woman standing in the doorway of the very office that your father was waiting to enter. She was wearing an elaborate jacket made of what looked like rainbow snake scales. Her hair was gray and curly. She had, you realized, two different colored eyes. 
Your father swallowed, and you could see the apple of it bob up and down. It made you think, abruptly, of suckling pigs. 
“Dr. Gaul,” he said, in a voice far too tight to be relaxed. “I apologize for my daughter’s insubordination, I assure you, she meant no--”
Dr. Gaul waved her hands at him and approached you. 
“Did you like last year’s games?” She didn’t look angry. No, she looked delighted.
“I…” It was your turn to swallow, your turn to feel that tightness. “It-it was the first time I’ve watched them, ma’am.” You want to ask this woman: do you think I liked watching someone from my District 2 so horribly? Or any District, really? Did I like it? 
Her smile grew wider. 
“I’m glad. You’ll be watching them every year from now on, I hope. We have big plans.” Her eyebrows raised high. “Big changes. Thanks to men like your father.” She glanced at him and you saw disdain flicker across her gaze. 
And then another door opened, and you heard the sound of polished shoes on the marble floor. Dr. Gaul’s attention dropped away from you like you were nothing at all. She turned to meet the sound of these footsteps, and you did too.
It was a young man. Probably your age, you thought, with light blonde hair and eyes that your mother would have described as “baby blue.” He didn’t look at you, or your father. But that was nothing new. You’d only been in the Capitol for 2 days, and you’d already gotten used to being treated as lesser than. Though, at least, you were not so far down on the food chain that you lost your tongue. 
“Ah, my protege,” said Dr. Gaul, giving the young man a grin. The smile on her face almost looked warm, which was somehow far more terrifying than her manic smile from earlier. “Ever the earnest student. Aren’t you supposed to be enjoying the day off, Mr. Snow?”
The young man, this “Snow,” chuckled and lowered his gaze. “I couldn’t stay away once I heard you were discussing some of the new prototypes for this year’s games.” 
He finally looked at your father, and then at you. But only briefly.
“Can I assume that this is…?”
Dr. Gaul nodded.
“Yes. My little designer from District 2. And his daughter.” Her voice dropped a few octaves when she referred to you. She probably didn’t want you here, you thought. You weren’t supposed to come, but your father had begged the Capitol for a pass; it would probably be your only chance to see it, he said, so you may as well take advantage of the chance.
Snow nodded to your father. It was a surprising gesture, almost respectful. But cold, too, like it was done from necessity rather than anything else. 
Your father stammered a bit and nodded back, and you felt shame begin to creep into your bones. It wasn’t fair, to be lesser-than. But weren’t others lesser-than you in your own District, where you ate better food and never worried that your name would get picked, that your blood would be spilled?
Everyone 
But when Snow turned to you, he smiled. It gave him dimples. 
It was the first kind smile anyone in the Capitol gave you. 
“My name is Coriolanus Snow. I doubt you’ve heard of me, but if Dr. Gaul’s teachings have anything to say about it, perhaps one day you’ll know me as a Gamemaker.” 
You didn’t know what to say. Congratulations, one day you’ll be coordinating Games that kill people? Instead,  you gave your name, voice squeakier than you meant it. But it was fitting, you supposed. Here, you were a mouse, hoping you would get a bite of cheese and make it home unpoisoned. 
Dr. Gaul’s face seemed to react slowly, as if she couldn’t decide what she thought about his words or your interaction, but a small smile grew on it, eventually. “I do have high hopes for you, Mr. Snow. Now, shall we?”
She gestured for your father to follow, face once again impassive with a sprinkle of disdain, as she led the two of them into her office.
Snow gave you a smile and a nod before he left.
You waved, stupidly.
Your father didn’t even look back.
--
I’m dead. I’m dead. I might as well be dead.
Your heartbeat kept time with your racing thoughts as you went up and down corridors, begging your shoes to be silent, wishing your breath would catch and stop coming out in terrible pants.
You were lost. You weren’t where you were supposed to be. If someone found you, if the wrong person found you, they would think you were running, trying to get lost in the Capitol; they’d think  you were a rebel. They’d shoot you.
Just when you thought you might collapse and die from your own nervous exhaustion, you heard the most wonderful sound in the world.
Your name.
It was only the moment after that you realized it didn’t come from your father’s mouth, but the lips of--what his name--Coriolanus Snow. The young man who was a Gamemaker-in-training, or so your father said. But that’s all he would say. He kept tight about anything that went on behind closed doors. 
But this Coriolanus Snow smiled at you, and didn’t look at you like you were some kind of insect he might want to pin on a board, and so when you whirled around to look at him you were smiling.
Ah--for a moment. For just a moment, you saw his muscles tense. You saw the expression on his face falter in worry. Like he thought he was about to miss a step on a staircase, and corrected himself; like he thought you were a wolf and you were only somebody’s dog, off their leash. 
But it wasn’t too surprising. You knew most people in the Capitol thought anyone from the Districts wanted to rip out their throats. 
Well, the worry was mutual. Except in your case, you were forced to walk around with the living proof of that worry--all those “Avoxes,” they called them. Without tongues, without freedom. 
But you swallow all that. Because he smiled at you. Because maybe it wouldn’t hurt to make a friend. Especially right now.
“I’m--I’m lost,” you tell him, giving a shaky smile. “I was waiting for my father, but you see, I got to thinking, and I started to wander around and now I’m… well. I don’t know where I am, actually.”
His smile wasn’t very deep, was it? It was like the gloss of paint on the outside of the Capitol buildings. Pretty to look at, but there must be more underneath.
You expected him to lead you right back to where you’re supposed to be.
Instead, he asked you something.
“What were you thinking about?
You couldn’t tell him. Could you? But something about 
“About… the Games.”
You don’t tell him that you were thinking about Lucy Gray and all those snakes, and the way that Dr. Gaul’s outfit that first day made you think of them. Because your father had slapped you across the face when you got back to your lodgings that night, and told you to never, ever bring up Lucy Gray Baird or the 10th Games unless you were directly asked. And you would probably never be asked. 
Coriolanus gave a little snort through his nose. You liked it. It was nice to know that even Capitol people could seem a little dorky.
“They aren’t for another 3 months. Are you that eager to see them?”
You didn’t know what expression you made, exactly. It was so instinctive and fast that you didn’t have time to control it. 
You only knew that it made him shake his head and offer you a sympathetic look.  
“I apologize. That was rude, wasn’t it?” 
And then he did a strange thing.
He offered you his arm. 
Like you were Capitol, like you were a real person, and not some visiting District wench walking on the coattails of her arms-dealing father. 
“Let me walk you back to the waiting area.”
And the stranger thing?
You took it.
--
You and your father were quickly moved into a small apartment within the university, once it became clear that he would be staying in the Capitol through the duration of the Games. It was best, he said, because ordinary people in the Capitol didn’t really want to see new faces from the Districts mingling around unless their tongue had been cut out first. It made them nervous. The rebel bombings, and all that.
You didn’t mind, because it meant you didn’t have to be flanked by Peacekeepers on the streets. 
And, well.
You got to see Coriolanus more often. Sometimes he greeted you, sometimes he didn’t. He did it less often when Dr. Gaul was there,  unless she was talking to your father and it gave him an opportunity.
He asked you things, too, when he caught you walking back to your father’s little apartment. Like what you did back home. What you liked to do. Whether you went to school, and what you planned to do now that you have graduated. 
This morning, he caught you drawing while you waited in a chair outside Dr. Gaul’s office. Sometimes you waited there--you would admit to no one that it was to catch a glimpse of the kindest person you’d met in the Capitol--and other times you stayed in your temporary home.
“What are you drawing?” He asked. But he had a way of speaking that you’d quickly clocked into. He can make a demand sound like a polite little question. Oh, he wasn’t mean about it, but it reminded you of the way your father talked to his underlings back in District 2. On his home turf, he was far smoother than he was here, where his voice stammered and sweat beaded on his neck.
So you handed it over, even though, to your greatest embarrassment, you’d drawn… him.
“Why me?” He had a smile on his lips. His smiles were nice. Kind. The kindest you’d seen since you came here. But they always felt like that fresh coat of paint; like you didn’t know what he really meant by them, and that was how he liked it. 
“You’re… important,” is all you could come up with. You felt small, then. He would dismiss and probably never want to talk to you again. What a stupid answer from a stupid girl. 
But he just smiled. It was like paint peeling a little.  You could see underneath that he liked what you said, although you weren’t exactly sure why. And his expression tightened up so quickly, protecting what you’d seen, that you weren’t entirely sure if it was real or not. 
“I’m just a humble student at this university. Not so important. Not yet.”
--
You were really going to die, now. This wasn’t some panicked imagination gone wrong, some flight of fancy that took a wrong turn.
A pair of stony-faced Peacekeepers had walked up to where you sat in the waiting area near Dr. Gaul’s office and ordered you to come with them.
You asked to talk to your father. They said no. You asked where you were going. They yanked you up. 
And now they were leading you down hallways that you’d never seen before, where there weren’t even Avoxes roaming the halls with brooms and dustpans. 
They didn’t even answer, just spun around and walked back the way they came. You pushed the door open reluctantly--what the hell was going to be on the other side?--and it was--it was--
It was Coriolanus. Standing there in a nice suit, eyes downcast on a book. Until the door creaked and he looked up.
“What--why did you bring me here? Did I do something wrong?” The thought went through you, that perhaps this had all been a test, to see if you were loyal to the Capitol and he’d found you wanting.
“No,” he said, simply enough. He set the book down and gestured for you to step inside. You did, because what else were you going to do, in some strange room in a Capitol University where you’d been forcibly brought by Peacekeepers.
Snow studied your face. Your eyes darted around, from him, to the room, to the door. 
“I wanted to see you,” he said, a little softer. “In private.” 
“Me?” You furrowed your eyebrows. “But… why?”
He smiled. “Come now, you’re a smart girl, even if you aren’t in university.” 
You really didn’t know. Not at first. But then you watched the way his expression softened, and you remembered it, or glimpses of it, that he’d given you before. When he complimented your drawing. When he said your name. When he escorted you back from the maze of hallways. And his smiles, all his smiles, although you were never sure how much they meant coming from home. 
He took a step closer. You didn’t dare step back. You weren’t sure if you wanted to step back, but it didn’t matter, either way.
He pressed his lips to yours and took your first kiss, in a secluded little study in the heart of the Capitol University. 
--
Your days became routine, although the routine was strictly forbidden and could have probably gotten you executed or at best, gotten you a one-way ticket to a tasteless existence.
You wake up. You stay in your apartment.  You wait for the Peacekeepers. You get summoned here and there, always private rooms, secret rooms, rooms out of the way. You meet Snow--Coriolanus, he said, call him that--and you talk (well, mostly him) and kiss and sometimes a little bit more. He gives you gifts. Trinkets, necklaces that you can only wear under your shirt. Food, flaky pastries made with mountains of sugar, sandwiches made with cream and cucumber. 
But how much longer could it go on? The Games were going to start soon. As soon as they were over, you were going back to your District. There would be no more meetings, no more kisses. No more wondering how far he wanted to go or why he liked you or even if he even liked you as anything more than someone to keep him busy. 
You didn’t dare talk about the Games, but you did talk about this. In the kindest way you knew how for such a sensitive subject. 
“I’ll miss you,” you told Coriolanus after one meeting, when you’re both sitting on a sofa and he’s got your fingers tightly wound in his. He squeezed them tight.
“Miss me?” 
“After the Games,” you clarified. “We’re being sent home right after.”
He squeezed your fingers until it hurt a little. Then he looked up at you. To see if you would say something? Or did he not know how strong he was?
“Oh, that. I can arrange for you to stay.”
Your chest began to feel sick.
“Stay? In the Capitol?” You were torn about Coriolanus, but you didn’t want to stay here. You couldn’t. 
“Yes,” he said, as if it was the simplest answer in the world. “You wouldn’t be the first person from the District granted such an extreme privilege. I’m sure I could--”
“But I don’t know if I want to stay.” 
His gaze narrowed and you felt your stomach clench. He looked at the necklace you’d pulled out as soon as the door was shut, at your lips where a dollop of strawberry cream still rested. 
“I treat you so well, and you don’t know if you want to stay with me?”
His voice was calm, and that scared you. It would have been better if he flew off the handle.
Instead, he simply stood up and gently sent you out the door, and called the Peacekeepers to bring you back to your apartment.
--
Every night for the last week, you have cried yourself to sleep. Because every day for the last week, Coriolanus Snow has not sent for you. Not even once.
What if he told someone? What if you got sent back early, and your father was shamed? What if they broke his contract? Or--worse, worse, worse. There were so many worse things than merely being sent back to District 2.
And then he sent for you, and it was the longest walk of your life, though it was no farther than any of the times you’ve been escorted to your secret meetings.
This time, when you pushed open the door, Coriolanus was not alone. 
There was an Avox in the room. 
It was someone from District 2.
You didn’t know her. Not personally. But you saw her, before. She worked in one of the munitions factories and you watched her walk to work from your classroom window sometimes. Then she stopped showing up, and you thought perhaps she got married. 
That delusion was shattered the moment you saw her, eyes downcast to the floor, wearing a simple gray tunic. 
It’s not until Coriolanus tells you to hurry up and come in that you’re able to move. Even then, you weren’t sure how your body did it; how your arms managed to gain the mobility to shut the door, to twist the lock; how your legs moved, one foot in front of the other, until you were standing stiffly in front of him.
The Avox--you wish you knew her name, but she couldn’t give it to you now, even if you asked--moved seamlessly to a table set up nearby. There was tea and sweets. The sort of thing that you and Coriolanus had been enjoying together for the past few weeks. The sort of thing that you were sure would sit sour in your stomach, now. 
The cup shook in your hands when she handed it to you, and your tears dripped right into the tea.
Coriolanus glanced at the Avox and waved his hand. She left obediently. She would never tell the secret she witnessed in his room, that much was certain.
And then he looked back at you.
“Don’t cry,” he said. Soft but firm. A command, not a coo. “You shouldn’t cry here, in the Capitol. You should be grateful to be here. You should be grateful that I’ve arranged all this for you.”
“I am,” you whispered. 
“Then show me that you are.”
And you did. 
You said what he wanted and looked to him to show you how he wanted you to act, and did just that. You didn’t argue, even to lightly banter. You kissed him and nodded along when he told you about how things would be after the Games, when he had arranged for you to stay.
All you had to do was keep him happy until the Games were over, and then you could go home. 
Bitterly, all of this made you realize just how much of your father is in you; he knew how to appease the Capitol. You could do the same with Coriolanus Snow. At least until the Games were over. Just keep him happy until the Games were done and the blood was spilled, and you would go home. 
They wouldn’t let him keep you here after the games. You were sure of that. You’d overheard some of Dr. Gaul’s assistants murmuring how glad they would be to send the District profiteers like your father home once the Games were over. And you? You’re just his useless daughter, an appendage he brought like an unwelcome suitcase. Why would you be allowed to stay?
--
The Games were over. The winner was from District 1. 
You were going home any day now. Just as soon as your father finished tinkering with the designs, gave his notes on improvements that might be made for next year.
The thought gave you a delightful bounce in your step. It was like having a pat of sweet butter in your shoe on a day when you needed good luck-- District 2 superstition, although the strict rationing meant most people didn’t have even a pat to slip into their shoes anymore.
The sweetness didn’t even disappear when the Peacekeepers showed up to bring you to Snow. It was going to be a bittersweet farewell, you were sure. He might be angry. But you would kiss him and tell him that there was nothing he could do, and how sorry you were not to be able to stay, but that was how things had to be.
Except they didn’t bring you down a maze of corridors that led to a secluded room.
They brought you right into Dr. Gaul’s office.
Breakfast threatened to evacuate your stomach with every step. Not just because of nerves, but because of what you saw. Rows of experiments in glass tubes; some of them move. You walk by a room with a half-open door that showed someone strapped to a gurney, face contorted in a silent scream as they fought against restraints. You almost did lose breakfast, then.
But somehow you made it to the desk of Dr. Gaul without a dribble of vomit to show for it.
The Peacekeepers left with no fanfare and you stood there, ramrod straight. Did she know? Was she going to tell you that you were going to be strapped to one of those gurneys, now?
“I’m keenly aware,” she said, keeping her hands primly folded, “on how much you’ve enthralled my star pupil.”
Toast. That’s what will come up first, you thought . The toast.
“I don’t know what you mean, ma’am.” Your voice was so thin and tinny that you didn’t even believe yourself.
And then the prim facade cracked, and Dr. Gaul threw her head back and grinned.
“You really think I don’t know everything that goes on within these walls?  I know every time one of my lab assistants runs into the bathroom to throw up after a particularly nasty experiment. I know every time one of our university professors sneaks into a closet to down a vial of morphling with a student. And I certainly know when my newest protege is having an adorable little District girl brought to him for… canoodling.”
You weren’t even embarrassed. No.  You just felt terrified to the bone. You only hoped that you’d be killed, shot against a wall, instead of made into an Avox. Let there be some mercy in this world. 
”He’s asked to keep you, you know.” Her voice was low, almost a drawl. She tapped her fingers on her desk rhythmically.
“My Coriolanus Snow wants a bird of his own.” Her smile turned darker. “Not a songbird, though. Oh, no. I think he’s had enough of those.”
Her gaze bored into yours, each color magnified by her intense expression. “I think if I let him have his pretty caged bird, he’ll be happy. He’s more productive if he’s happy.” She smiled. “I like productivity. It keeps the Games more interesting.”
She looked you over one more time, and then waved you away.
“I’ve granted his request. You’ll be staying here indefinitely, courtesy of one Mr. Snow. Your father has already been told.” 
You were wrong.
It was not the toast that came up first, but the sweet butter you’d patted on top.
--
You still had your tongue, but you felt as though it was useless, stuck to the roof of your mouth, as Coriolanus fussed over your outfit. Or rather, as he directed an Avox to fuss over it for you. He could afford his own personal servant, now, he told you. He’d almost flinched after he said now, and you didn’t dare press him on it. Had he not been able to afford one before?
“We can’t walk arm-in-arm in public,” he said, walking around you, making sure the outfit was just-right. “But you can stand by me if I stop and direct you forward.” He reached over and fixed one of your buttons. “Don’t speak to anyone unless I’ve told you to, or they speak to you first. Always address someone older as ‘sir,’ or ‘ma’am.” He pointed at your hair, and the Avox began to fuss with it, eventually covering it in a colorful wrap that Coriolanus said was popular right now. “Address someone our age by the last name and Mr. or Ms.”
When he was satisfied with your appearance, he sent the Avox away. You liked it better that way, it was one last reminder of the horrors in the Capitol, even for someone “privileged” like you.  You’d only been without your father for 3 days, but you felt like your nerves were continually on fire. You wanted to go home. You wanted your family. You wanted out of this place.
But that wasn’t going to happen.
For now, you were still living in the small university apartment the Capitol had given your father. Coriolanus insisted on it, until he could figure out how to move you into his own sprawling apartment that he shared with his cousin, Tigris (who, at least, genuinely sounded lovely) and his grandmother, Grandma’am. She was the sticking point, or so you were told, with a thin smile. She hated Districts, and she ought to, he said. They killed her son. His father. 
She would hate you, too. Even if Coriolanus wanted you enough to make you stay with him; wanted you enough to keep you. But for how long? And would he change his mind, if you couldn’t fit in? 
He said your name, and you snapped yourself out of your thoughts. He held you by your shoulders. Gently. Like one would an unruly child that hadn’t yet learned that there were such things as salad forks and dinner forks, as polite conversation and etiquette. 
You got the feeling you wouldn’t have long to learn all of those things and more, to make him happy.
“Remember,” he said. “You’re District. You’re here because the Capitol has recognized that your loyalty can benefit us in some way. Be grateful.”
“I am,” you said, reflectively.
“Be happy..”
“I am,” you said again, your chest hitching.
He smiled at you. Was it real or not real? 
You smiled back, regardless. And he liked that, evidently, because he leaned forward and kissed you. Then he scrutinized your face and wiped at your lips with his thumb--the kiss had smeared your lipstick. 
“Good.” 
He gestured towards the open doorway. This time, he didn’t take your arm. There would be too many people lingering in the university hallways, all making their way to the soiree held to celebrate the end of this year’s Games and discuss what improvements might be made for the next year. 
You dutifully walked behind him, just like he said. And you would do exactly what he said in all respects. You would stay quiet unless you were spoken to, you would certainly never bring up anything confrontational or controversial, and you would make a good impression. You would be a loyal, grateful District citizen who was given the opportunity of a lifetime thanks to the graciousness of Coriolanus Snow. 
Of course you would. 
Your life depended on it. 
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neil-gaiman · 5 months ago
Note
Hi Mr. Gaiman (sorry for the ramble in advance),
Hope you're doing well. I don't usually use tumblr, but every time I open it up you're here so I figure I'd drop a note. I'm a writer, but I've always had a really hard time actually WRITING instead of just thinking about it. I've had this world and its characters plaguing my head for years now, and it's only gotten worse with age, so recently I doubled down and decided it was gonna get done—one way or the other.
I recently read a passage in a book about writing that said, in essence, your first book doesn't really matter all that much if you plan to be an author. As an autistic lad, I (naturally) took this very literally and was upset at the thought. Sure, your first work is probably going to be your weakest—duh, because by the time book two rolls around you'll have had time to have faced any criticisms from your first, you'll have learned more as you write, and about the world too. But for your first book to not matter at all, no matter how passionate you are about it—I found myself wondering, "Well, what's the point at all, then?" You put in all that work, you learn plot devices, you breathe life into your characters and watch 'em toddle around, and for what? For it to just be a stepping stone? It felt intensely personal of it just being cast aside like that, and I haven't even written the damn thing yet!
MasterClass had a Father's Day sale, so I figured "why not" and went ahead and got a subscription. First thing I did was run to your class, and although I've only watched the first two parts—I want to thank you for restoring my motivation. Truth is, I think the reason that message in the writing book upset me so much is because I'm terrified of writing this damn book. I've woven so many pieces of myself into it, despite it very much being, in your words, a lie (and about a boy that lies all the time, no less), but the grief that I feel and all the complicated feelings about forgiveness are all there and very real, despite its fantastical elements. So much of it really IS more than I'm comfortable sharing with people, and the idea of baring all that out and being told it didn't matter at all? Absolutely devastating. At the end of the line? The book might actually suck. I might rewrite it, I might trash it, I might completely forget about it ten years from now, or I might sell ten copies on Amazon to family and friends and then move on with my life. It's not stepping on a yellow jacket nest in the woods, but it's still terrifying. I still can't even fathom the idea of letting anyone actually read it until I've obsessed over it for another four years, and even then! But I'll write it anyways.
Thank you.
You are so welcome!
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2btheanswertothequestion · 2 years ago
Text
(part 2 of November Paramedic; part 1 is here.)
Steve's honey-sweet eyes, gleaming with confidence, ask 'why don't you take a bite?'
His pink mouth, deliciously curved, wonders 'don't you want a taste?'
His dark chest hair, leading a mouthwatering path down his pants, says 'you know you want to'.
And Eddie does. He really does. He would, if Steve was actually here. Alas, all Eddie has is the calendar photo currently staring at him from where it's propped on Eddie's dresser, and he's not biting into it. It's the only one he's got, you see; he won't be ruining it with bite marks and drool due to his intrusive thoughts.
If he had a copy machine close at hand, though? If he could make as many pictures as he'd possibly want? Oho, watch out, Slobbertown!
It's been one week since Steve the sexy paramedic revealed himself to be a real person and not just a dude in a softcore porn calendar. One week since he Florence Nightingale'd Eddie before vanishing in a flurry of bloody gauze and blinking blue lights, leaving both Eddie and Gareth breathless.
(Though in Gareth's case, it was due to laughing so hard he choked on himself.)
The calendar doesn't do it for him anymore. Don't misunderstand – he still uses it when beating the meat. In fact, it has exclusively become his primary masturbatory aid, and it has served him especially well the past few days. The moment those 48 hours were over and Gareth left, Eddie chucked off his sweatpants and went to, well, Slobbertown. But it's not the same anymore. How could it be, when he knows the real Steve's hair smells like a meadow and his aftershave like lemon and spice? When he's felt the pressure of Steve's fingertips on his jaw? When he's seen the faint scar running down Steve's chin from his mouth? When he can still hear Steve's voice use his name, give him orders, call him 'sir'?
It's impossible. Fuck, just whenever Eddie closes his eyes Steve's face appears, as vividly as if it happened yesterday. Of course, that might have something to do with Eddie already having made himself oh so familiar with Steve's face, and chest, and hands, and… everything else, for the past two years. Jesus damn it, if he knew this was where he'd end up he never would've bought the calendar in the first place.
Groaning, he throws himself back on his bed; then he shouts as his head thumps into the wall. Typical. He rubs at the spot to soothe it. No bump, though it hurts like a bitch. Pain (and suspicion he just aggravated the previous head injury) aside, he's comfortable, thus he sprawls out and stares at the ceiling as planned.
He's been distracted. He knows that because literally everyone has been on his case about it. Gareth gives him smug smiles that have turned alarmingly calculated as the week has passed. Jeff and Marv, having been filled in by Gareth, are rather more amused in a benign way. His boss almost sent him home to recuperate after catching him staring into space for the third time. Uncle Wayne noticed something was off through the phone. And Max has been giving him weird looks.
Ah, little Max. The only person in the complex who doesn't steer clear of him. She doesn't actually know what went down – not completely. She knows he got injured, because she caught him and Gareth as they stumbled home while she was exiting her apartment to toss the trash. Her sharp eyes zeroed in on the plaster, and on Eddie's arm that was slung over Gareth's shoulders for support (at Gareth's insistence).
"You got in a fight?" she asked.
With a grin he'd exclaimed, "Battle? You know me better than that! Nay, I did my utmost to escape the violence... but the ruffian got to me regardless."
"Huh. You okay?"
Gareth had rolled his eyes. "He's fine. I mean, listen to him."
"Don't worry about me, Red." Eddie tapped his own head. "This ol' noggin is harder than it looks."
A corner of her mouth twisted up, though if it was in amusement he couldn't tell in the dim hallway. They ought to team up against the super; maybe their combined whining will have him finally fix that broken light bulb.
"Make sure you don't take aspirin or ibuprofen," she said. "It can-"
"Yeah, I know. Paramedic already told me."
"Good. Is our lesson still on?"
"Certainly, m'dear."
And then he'd tipped an imaginary hat, she snorted, and Gareth hauled his ass to bed.
He didn't see Max again until Sunday afternoon, when she came by for their aforementioned weekly guitar lesson. Parking themselves on each end of the couch, his acoustic in her lap, he'd made her play the 'homework' from the previous Sunday. It sounded pretty good. She honestly won't need his help soon – probably doesn't need it now. She understands basic theory and is diligent about practicing. He'd be fine with awarding her temporary custody of the guitar for a while. She insists on coming over, however, claiming she has to be perfect by the time of the next open mic down at Connie's Corner Coffee.
The reason she has to be perfect? Well. Eddie is pretty sure it's to impress her boy. She hasn't confirmed that it's for her boy, or even that she has one, but it totally is and she totally does. He knows this because 1. she becomes flustered and grumpy (grustered? Flumpy?) every time he brings it up, and 2. if she was learning to play for herself he'd be subjected to a lot more Pink Floyd and a lot less Curtis Mayfield.
It's cute, to be honest. Picking up an instrument for a boy you like? That's romantic as fuck. If he hadn't been the Lord of All Losers he would've serenaded tons of boys when he was younger. Hell, he'd do it now, if only there were anyone willing to listen. But he hasn't had as much as a date in ages, and none of his previous attempts at relationships ever reached the 'romantic gestures' stage.
Maybe he should ask Max to set him up with someone. Why not? She probably meets dozens of people every day, at the campus, at the skatepark, wherever else she hangs. If there's anyone who could sort out his disastrous love life, it's Max Mayfield. She's so put together, and she's not even 20 yet. She's got her own place (in a supremely shitty building, but still a place), she's got a man (reluctant as she is to admit it), and she is halfway through her math degree. A fucking math degree, for Christ's sake! Math majors are built for solving problems!
Maybe she could even calculate how many times he'd need to injure himself before he'd meet the one paramedic he wanted to kiss… him better.
It was around that point of his daydreaming that Max shot a hair tie at his forehead and demanded he stop zoning out and correct her hand placement.
"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, her eyebrows furrowing deeper than usual. "Have you been resting?"
"Yes. For the prescribed 48 hours, and then some. I'm fine."
She'd frowned, scrutinizing him with those pale blue eyes. He squared his shoulders and met her gaze like a man. Easier said than done, to be truthful. He likes Max – she's fun, easily the most kickass neighbor he's ever had – but she can be intense. And when she gets her stare on? She's downright creepy.
"I'd prefer to cancel over you fucking up your head more," she at last said, posture stiff and chin jutting. 'Don't lie to me,' is what she meant.
Eddie sighed. "Red… I'm fine. Seriously."
And he was. Physically speaking, at least. Mentally, he'd always been a little off. Part of the patented Munson charm, really.
She must've realized that, because she relaxed, her expression going from 'active bitch face' and back to 'resting'.
"All right. Sorry for being overbearing. It's just." She shrugged a shoulder, gripping the neck of the guitar as it started sliding off her crossed legs. "One of my closest friends is a medical professional. Another one is studying biology. They've been discussing human anatomy and… I guess they've gotten into my head."
Damn his friends for caring. How was he supposed to sell this image of a dark, dangerous, rocker dude if he was constantly misty-eyed from how sweet his buds were to him? He leaned forward to pat her knee.
"I appreciate the concern, unnecessary as it is. But!" He drew himself back and pointed in the air. "We're not postponing! Open mic is less than a month away – you only have so many days left before you'll be on that stage, in front of aaaaall those people… and your beau."
He's certain that if she hadn't still been sorta concerned about his health, she'd have smacked him.
That was Sunday afternoon. Now is Wednesday evening. He is still hung up on Thursday. He doesn't even know why. Yes, he was face-to-face with the hottest guy ever. Sure, that same guy has been the star of his most critically acclaimed fantasies. Indeed, he hasn't gotten laid in eons. Of course, he's pent-up with sexual frustration and yearning for another man's touch.
But still. He's not an animal or a sex-crazed teenager. He's smart enough to know that nothing good will come of this. It's not like he'll ever see Steve again. That'd be so unrealistic.
A knock on his front door reaches his ears. Eddie makes no effort to get up and answer it. He's not expecting anyone – whoever it is will have to return another day.
The knocking turns into a pounding, followed by yelling.
"Eddie! Let me in, asshole, I know you're there!"
Ugh. What does he want? Hasn't he heard of texting?
Eddie drags himself off the bed and toward the door. Yanking it open, he's met by Gareth's self-satisfied visage.
"Good evening," he says, heedless of Eddie’s glare. "I come hither with your solution."
"My solution?" Eddie mutters as he stalks to his couch to crumple into another heap.
Gareth follows him inside. "I have a plan to get your man!"
"What? Who? What?"
"Steve. November-paramedic," Gareth says, like it's obvious, which, what the actual fuck?
"He's not my man?"
"But he could be."
"Gareth, what the fuck-"
He moves to sit up, but Gareth's palm hits him square in the diaphragm and pushes him back down.
"No, listen: you are a terrible patient."
"I'm not-"
"Remember back in high school, when that asshole rear-ended us in the intersection at Hickory and 5th?"
Eddie grimaces. How could he forget? They'd stopped at a red light when a drunken motherfucker plowed into them, sending them careening into the T-junction. One car managed to break before hitting them; another veered only to crash into a fourth car. The result was, for them, whiplash injuries and, for the people who collided, bruises, sprains, and a dislocated joint. It had been the scariest moment of Eddie's life, and the neck pain had been excruciating. That wasted piece of shit was lucky no one died.
He says, "Yeah?"
"You were so snarky with that poor EMT."
"Okay, first off, I was a snot-nosed brat back then-"
"Dude, you were nineteen."
"-and she was rude to me first."
"She was following protocol!" Gareth shakes his head. "The point is that you never follow orders or instructions, not even when a doctor tells you to. But November-Steve? I've never seen you be so pliable."
"I-"
"And after, when I had to babysit you for two fucking days? I expected it to be difficult. But you were so busy sighing and yearning-" he says, ignoring Eddie's indignant sputtering, "-and replaying him tenderly caressing your face with his big, manly hands and holding your gaze with those big, manly eyes-"
"Do you want to fuck him?"
"-that you forgot to complain or be a contrarian about everything." Gareth smiles, sweet as cavities. "It was great. I'd like to recapture that. And if November-Steve is the one to bring it out of you, well!"
Eddie glowers at him. No, really! With the metaphorical thunder clouds swirling over his head and everything! His world has been shook. It is tilted off its axis, and it's his best friend's duty to mock him relentlessly for it. But this? Trying to encourage him? Give him hope? That's going too far.
Gareth notices. Of course he does; curse the heart on Eddie's sleeve. The sickly-sugary smugness evaporates off him, and he takes a seat on the dingy couch seat.
"Eddie," he says with a softness reserved for a select few individuals. "Seriously. You've been all moon-eyed for a week. You've been thinking about him. Really thinking."
Eddie balloons his cheeks and huffs out the air. "Well. If you spend two years jerking it to a guy-"
"Gross."
"-and then he suddenly appears before you, in the flesh? I've been fantasizing about it. He's a fantasy. And when it actually happens, that's…"
He trails off. Gareth knocks their shoulders together.
"He seemed nice."
Eddie scoffs. "I spoke to him for fifteen minutes. Tops."
"Fifteen nice minutes. You haven't dated in ages. Maybe this is a sign?"
Chuckling, Eddie slumps his head onto Gareth's shoulder. They're the wrong heights for it, so it's awkward and strenuous on the neck. He remains.
"You're just looking for another opportunity to embarrass me," he says.
"Embarrass you and improve your life. Like only true friends strive to do."
Eddie hums. "So what's your fucking plan?"
Gareth shifts, turning toward Eddie, but doesn't say anything yet. Glancing up, Eddie is met by a zoomed-in, upside-down view of Gareth's pointy grin, his canines gleaming.
"The university!"
------------------------------
Taglist: @rougenancy, @raisedbylibrarians, @yourebuckingkiddingme, @swimmingbirdrunningrock, @emma77645, @goodolefashionedloverboi, @eddielives1986, @stevesbipanic, @the-redthread, @fandemonium-takes-its-toll, @henderdads, @gay-little-bitch, @lordofthepointygerbils, @lenore1232, @imzadidragonfly, @zerokrox-blog, @eddiemunsonswife, @cherrycolas-things, @ediewentmissing, @princess-eddie, @atombombbibunny, @ajamlessbaby, @dogswithforks, @grimmfitzz, @cutiecusp, @cuips-not-cute, @manicallydepressedrobot, @messrs-weasley, @madaboutmunson, @mightbeasleep, @suikatto, @brassreign, @snapshotmaestro, @bea-sayan, @courtjestermunson, @csinnamon-fox, @steveisabicon, @spectrum-spectre, @spinmewriteround , @just-super-fucking-gay, @escapingthereality, @oneweirdcryptid
No longer adding to the tag list, due to numbers and (hopefully temporary) technical difficulties. Please save or memorize the tag #steddie fic: november paramedic instead; all the parts will be there (unless something goes terribly wrong).
Thank you for reading! 🖤 ☺
Part 3
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worldofkuro · 6 months ago
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Painted Smile
Painted Smile XV
Pairing: Alastor x Female! Reader
<- Previous Chapter I Next Chapter ->
Summary: You couldn't wait to meet new friends. What you didn't expect was this smiling little boy, only one year older than you, that would take such a big place in your life.
Notes: Because I wasn't satisfied with the last chapter I decided to post the next one right now. I’m so excited about your thoughts because the plot is finally beginning !  I can’t wait to hear about your theories. 
“ It makes your boobs look ugly, another one please !”
You were being tugged behind the curtain already being undressed to put on another dress. Today you were with Alice, in one of the most expensive shops of all New Orleans, to find your wedding dress. It was an exciting, amusing and stressful experience. Alice was being, as usual, honest about the dress you have been trying for almost an hour. 
“ Alice, how many more dresses do I need to try? You know we still don’t have a date for the wedding? Alastor’s father is still missing.”
“ What about it? His loss if he misses the wedding. Now, I think I’ve found the perfect dress for you~!” 
You laughed behind the curtain. Alice didn’t even know Alastor’s father, she never met him but you have told her once that you didn’t feel comfortable with him and she decided that she would hate him until the end of time. You looked at the dresses you have been trying, a part of you was happy to be here with your best friend and yet you wondered…Were you selfish? You knew Alice was in love with Alyzée but they couldn’t get wed to each other… Were you hurting Alice without being aware of it?
“ Alice–?”
“ This one. This one will fit perfectly your waist, your legs, your shoulder, your chest. For heaven’s sake, I’m the best.” she said looking at her nails. Why were your best friend and your future husband so full of themselves while you were always insecure ! “ Come on, try this one.”
“ Alice.. I’m.. You’re okay?” you asked, taking the dresses off her hands.
“ Yes? Well, I’m still shocked about what you told me about John, but you know what we say, we don’t keep trash around us.”
“ Who is “we”?”
“ Me, Myself and I. Now, try the dress, doll ! I’ll find the shoes!” you laughed as you watched her running away. You sighed with a smile, you were surrounded by amazing people, you should try to be more sure about yourself.
The workers from the stores helped you put on the dress and your shoes. You looked at yourself in the mirror. You felt.. pretty. Really pretty. You smiled at yourself, moving the pans of the dress, loving the movement it was doing.
“ Can I see?”
“ Of course Alice.” you turned around. Since you could remember, Alice always knew how to dress you up. From her Christmas’s Eve’s soirée where she had found that beautiful dress from today, she would always come with outfits from other countries, always being new, unique, something Alastor scoffed most of the time. He was always saying that Alice was running toward the future without being aware of her surroundings. And Alice was always saying that Alastor needed to shut up because he was lucky to look good in anything.
“ Oh my Lord. You look ravishing, my friend!” she clapped her hands together, her eyes whelming up a bit. “ Oh God… I’m… I’m so proud of you.”
“ I haven’t done anything yet.” you laughed nervously.
“ Take the compliment for once. So, what do you think? I , personally, think it’s the perfect dress for you. But what do you think?”
“ This is my favorite too. but the price–”
“ Let me buy it.” you opened your mouth, ready to complain but Alice stopped you with her hand.” I know, I know, you’ve never liked me paying stuff for you, expensive things mostly. But please, just this one, let me buy it. I… The next time I go into this kind of shop might be for my own wedding, which won’t be filled with laughter and love like we just did. It might be selfish, but just.. I want this moment. I’m sorry–”
“ Okay.” you smiled, almost moved to tears by her comment “ But Alice, for your wedding, no matter with who, I’ll be there. There will be laughter and love, because you won’t be alone in this.”
You saw Alice nodded, wiping some tears from her eyes. You looked at her, your best friend might never be married to the one she loved, but you will never let her feel loveless. 
You took off the dress, as Alice went to pay in cash. You joined her once you were dressed with your own clothes and you both walked toward her place. You saluted the butler, who bowed to you.
You both sat down in the huge living room, sighing in relief. You took off your heels, your feet were killing you. 
“ By the way, if we need to find Alastor’s father to be able to have your wedding, do you want me to… pull a few strings for you? I could call the best of the best!”
“ No, no. I won’t lie, the fact that he is missing isn’t… bothering me.”
“ I’ll cheer for that. “ she winked at you before asking for wine. You laughed, she always loved Rosé. It wasn’t very strong in alcohol, it had a very good taste but when the alcohol hitted. Dear lord…
You didn’t drink too much, you had to walk back home yourself after all. You smiled when you saw Alice put on Alastor's broadcast even though she was rolling her eyes at the radio sometimes.
“ Are you hearing him? Gosh. I knew you when your voice was cracking, Alastor !” she shouted at the radio.
“ Alastor voice never–”
“ A woman can dream, dear. Gosh, now I hear his voice anywhere I’m going.”
You laughed behind your glass. Alastor was gaining popularity surprisingly quickly, which was good of course. It was the best outcome you could imagine.
“ Now, about my cottage.”
“ Alice, we told you we don’t have the money and you just bought me my wedding dress.”
“ Who is “we” my dear?”
“ Me, Myself and I.” You stuck your tongue at her, making her laugh. Alice was a girl ahead of her time with her manners and way of talking, she always felt like a breeze of fresh air. 
“ Well, if you all say so.” She took a sip of a drink before looking at the door, her father making his entrance. You stood up as the big man smiled at you, he always has been nice, never raising his voice, always wanting what’s best for Alice.
“ Oh, good afternoon ladies. Alice, I just wanted to tell you that you might have a date with the son of the–”
“ Yes Daddy, I know, don’t worry I’ll go.” she said, looking away. You saw her father smile sadly before leaving after giving you both candy you used to like when you were younger. You looked at her, worried. Was she going to be okay? “ Don’t look at me like that Doll. It’s going to be the same as usual, I’m going there, bat my pretty eyes and at the end, I’ll just say to Daddy that the man wasn’t what we needed for the family.”
“ How long do you think you can keep this game going?”
She stared at the large windows in silence. Alice was just like a bird in a cage, she felt like freedom, but would never taste it for herself.
“ As long as I can.”
You stayed with her until the sun was setting down. The maid took her to her bedroom as she was sleeping on the sofa. Seems like going on another date was getting harder and harder for her. Was Alyzée aware of it? You sighed as you gave your goodbye, before walking out of the mansion. 
You decided to go into a park, walking between the trees. There weren’t a lot of people outside, even though we were in March, the weather was still cold. You stopped when you saw an old man fall not too far from you.
“ Oh sir! Are you alright, let me help you!” you said as you took the cane that had fallen from his hand. You helped him sitting down on a nearby bench. 
“ Oh, thank you little lady.”
The man was tall, black with brown eyes, a white beard, he was wearing a hat, helding on his cane, he seemed like he had injured his leg.
“ Do you want me to take a look at your leg? I’m no nurse, but I used to help my father when he came back from war.”
“ Ahh, war. You don’t need to take care of me, little lady.” he smiled warmly at you. “ You look sad yourself, do you need to talk about it with an old man?”
You looked at him, he felt so warm and he was… cute. His aura was gentle, cute like a kid that wanted to learn something new. You haven’t seen your grandfather since he died during the war, you haven’t had the strength to go back to your old country to go to his grave so… Maybe why not indulge yourself and talk with this man?
“ I’m… I want to help a friend, she is in love but can’t marry that person.”
“ Aah, love. And why can’t she?”
“ She had to marry someone from “noble blood”.” you sighed, rolling your eyes. It was bullshit. “ She has no choice.”
“ Mhn… I think she does, little lady. We always have a choice, when you think you don’t have one, it’s because you already made up your mind. “ he smiled at you with eyes that held so much wisdom. 
“ But… What if the other choices are more dangerous?” you asked, feeling like you weren’t talking about Alice anymore.
“ Well, little lady. What would you do?” 
You stopped talking. You killed to be with the one you wanted. You had a choice and yet..
“ Are you unhappy with the choices you made?” 
“ No, but I’m afraid of what it will bring at my door.”
“ Aah.. Si jeunesse savait, si vieillesse pouvait.”
“ What?”
“ You will see, little lady. Your friend is maybe so blinded by what she has to do that she can’t see what she could do. Love is the deadliest poison and yet the sweetest remedy in the world. She should try to think for herself, don’t you think? Would you rather live your whole life in misery or be happy for a short time of your existence? The difference between existing and living is thin, little lady, but it exists.” he nodded before looking at the sky, seeming lost in thoughts. 
You stared at this mysterious man. He seemed to be around 60, maybe that is why he seemed so wise. You looked at the sky and gasped when you saw the moon in the sky. It was already dark!
“ Oh, I need to go!” you stood up but before leaving you took the candy from Alice’s father. You smiled at the man, placing the candy in his veiny hands. “ Thank you for that useful advice.” You beamed at him as he looked curiously at the candy before smiling at you. “ Maybe we’ll see each other one day again !”
“ May our ways cross again if needed, little lady, may our ways cross…”
You ran back home, feeling better than when you left Alice’s house. You walked inside and saw your father with Jeff in the living room. They were still trying to understand how Alastor’s father could have disappeared like this. You smiled at the men, walking toward them.
“ Nothing news?”
“ No, my sweet daughter. We are trying, but from the moment he left the bar he wasn’t seen anymore.”
“ I’m sure the wife was having an affair and decided to kill the husband. Classic scenarios.”
“ And how could she have done that?” you sat on the sofa, staring at Jeff with an innocent smile. You almost smirked when you saw him puffing his chest, feeling so much pride in vomiting all the information he should kept away from you.
“ The man came home, drunk. She could easily poison him, hide the body somewhere and end the story.”
“ Mhn… But without a body, you don’t know. What if he was the one having an affair and ran away? From what I understood, he seemed to be someone who drank a lot, maybe he was being ambushed in an alley because we know for a fact he never made it back home.” you smiled at him, your father smiling with pride by your side.
“ That what they say but–”
“ No, that’s what we said. I was there. I’ve never seen this man come back home.” you stared at him down. He shut his mouth. “ You see, I really want to get married and the fact that you are trying to put the blame on my future family in law is getting on my nerves. So please, do me, us, a favor, find out what happened. And if you are unable to, just give up.” you looked at your father. “ I don’t want to wait forever, I want to get married.”
Your father stared at you before kissing your forehead.
“ Alright sweetie, we have a new man who’ll help us in this case. I’ll give him three months, if he doesn’t find anything, I will close the case and we will concentrate on your wedding.” you hugged your father with a happy grin. Finally! 
You bid your goodbye before going into your bedroom, getting ready to go to bed. You listened to the noises downstairs, waiting for Jeff to go and your father to go to bed.
You were concentrating so much on trying to hear what was going downstairs that you didn’t notice the shadows behind you. You almost shouted as a gloved hand fell upon your mouth, muffling your screams. 
“ You’re such an easy prey, dearest.”
You sighed in relief as you closed your eyes. Alastor was really the quietest being you have ever met, which was surprising when he was the noisiest man on the radio.
You turned your head toward him, looking at his mocking smile. He was so full of himself. You bit his finger before letting it go, going for a hug. He hummed against you.
“ How did you come here?”
“ Well, the windows, dear.” 
You scoffed before forcing him to sit on your bed. You sat on his lap and took his hand with yours, playing with his fingers.
“ I have my wedding dress.” you smirked when you felt his whole body tensed underneath you. “ And you won’t see it, because I left it at Alice’s.”
“ Do you really need Alice in your life, dearest?” asked Alastor with an amused voice.
“ Yes! Come on Alastor, be honest with me, you enjoy Alice’s company?”
“ Hah ! I enjoy Alice’s contacts nothing more.” he rolled his eyes, pressing you against his body. “ She is useful and she can be amusing, when she is having problems.” he smirked at you, making you slap his shoulder, trying to contain your laughter. He was such a…
“ Well, I have some news on your father’s case, my dear future husband.” you smiled as you explained what happened with Jeff. You couldn’t help but grin when you saw Alastor beaming with pride as he listen to what you have told the policeman.
“ My, my… So, they think my Mother did it?”
“ For now, we know that we have three months until we are completely free of it.”
“ Have you felt it again?”
You tilted your head.
“ What?”
“ The need to kill.” he asked you, gripping your waist, pressing your body against his. You felt lightheaded.
“ N-N.. Well… I thought for a second.. to kill John.” you saw Alastor’s pupils dilated as he stared at you before kissing your neck. You tilted your head to give him more room.
“ Mhn, interesting, go on, why?”
“ Because he was bad mouthing you.” you tried to contain the anger in your voice, you didn’t want to wake up your parents. “ Who does he think he is?” you rolled your eyes, you were still hurt about what John has said but now you weren’t feeling sadness over it, only anger.
“ Would you like to kill him?”
You looked at Alastor who had his chin against your chest, looking at you in a way too innocent face for the conversation you were having.
“ Alastor, we can’t. There would be too much suspicion on us, we already have your father’s disappearance on us, if we kill John–” he kissed you feverishly making you sigh in the kiss. Oh, how you loved the feeling of Alastor’s lips against yours.
“ Do you hear yourself, darling?” he smiled against your lips. “ In your mind, you are already ready to kill him… ” he sighed against your skin. You stared at him, stroking his cheeks. You wanted to see the Alastor you had seen the first time you killed.
 The difference between existing and living is thin, little lady, but it exists.
You kissed Alastor on the nose, with an excited smile.
“ Not now.”
You fell asleep with new marks on your thighs and your neck. When you woke up the next morning, you were already smiling.
You stayed with your mother all morning, spending time with her until you decided to go to Alice’s. You didn’t know when her date was supposed to be, but if you could help her morally before she had to leave, it would be great. You took some pancakes you’ve made and walked toward her mansion, the butler let you enter, escorting you to the living room.
“ Miss Alice shall be here soon.”
You nodded before sitting on the sofa. You put the pancakes on the table and wait until you hear the familiar footsteps of your best friend. You turned your head and smiled at her, as usual, she was beautiful. 
“ Hello Alice.” you stood up and you both hugged each other. She sat next to you, holding her head in her hand. “ Mhn, the wine doesn’t taste good the day after, right?” you laughed as she groaned.
“ Please, not so loud…”
“ What a hangover.” you whispered, mockingly. She stuck her tongue at you before digging into your pancakes. “ Well, someone is hungry.”
“ I don’t want this man to think he has a chance with me because I seem eager to eat.” 
You smiled, crossing your legs. You told Alice that you needed to wait three more months before finally concentrating on your wedding. You laughed as she let out a sigh of pure relief.
“ Thank God, since when do we stop living because a man disappeared.” she rolled her eyes before eating the last pancake. You look at the butler who came to announce Alice’s date. And like an actress, Alice put on the fakest smile she could conjure, Alastor would be proud. You stood up as a man, looking around 40 came into the living room, he was sweating so much you could see sweat pearling on his forehead.
You gave Alice a look, encouraging her with your eyes before leaving, you even made a face to the butler who nodded at you, with a disgusted face. You laughed before leaving, going out to buy some pastries. You walked to the park, thinking about your weddings. Where should you do it? What about the honeymoons? Did Alastor want children? 
You stopped when you saw the same old man from last time, sitting on the bench, smoking a pipe. You grinned and walked toward him.
“ Hello, sir.”
“ Hello, little lady.”
“ Might I sit a moment with you?”
“ It would be my pleasure. You seem happier than yesterday.”
You smiled as you sat next to the man. You felt safe with him, maybe it was because his aura reminded you of your deceased grandfather..? You didn’t know. You began to talk, mostly about what was going on in your life until you began to talk about your wedding.
“ Mhn, you have quite the ring.” the old man said with a little grin. He didn’t have a ring on his fingers, did he never get married?
“ Yes, in less than three months, I will be able to concentrate on my wedding.”
“ Who is the lucky lad?”
“ If you are listening to the radio you might have heard him, his name is Alastor.”
“ Alastor heh..? Quite a name, quite a name…”
You smiled, happy that Alastor was getting a name to himself. You took your box of pastries and held one for your new friend. He thanked you before eating one éclair au chocolat. You smiled as you kept talking with him, the man mostly listening and giving you wise advice.
“ Being too confident is not a good thing, your insecurity might be a blessing on some occasions.”
“ What do you mean?”
“ Don’t be afraid, to feel afraid. The ones who don’t fear are gods, spirits…”
“ But it’s irrational.” you frowned, how many times you felt jealousy when you didn’t need to be.
“ Yes, but it’s instinctive. Here is some wise advice from an old man: trust your feelings.  Did they ever betray you in the past, when you needed them, little lady?” he looked at you with a warm smile.
You looked at the ground. Your family always told you, you were sensitive, you would easily be overwhelmed by what you were feeling or what was going on around you. 
But when Alastor’s father took the bullets, you didn’t know why, you felt it in your guts that something was going to happen. That’s why you had run outside to find Alastor and that's how you killed his father. 
But then, why did you not feel John’s romantic attention towards you ?
“ People who feel a lot are trying to balance themselves by becoming observant. That way, they feel more grounded, they think they are being rational, which can be good sometimes. But you mustn't discard your feelings, you’ll lose yourself like that. You seem like a sensitive little lady, it’s not bad and it’s not good, that's what you seem to be. Why would you want to be like others, they are already busy being themselves.”
“ So.. I should listen to myself more?”
“ It’s a choice you can make. Feeling emotions is a good thing, it connects you to the rest of the world.” he nodded before looking at the sky, smiling warmly. “ And isn’t it beautiful?”
You stared at the man. He was such an.. intense person in a way. Would he talk to you the same way if he knew you had killed someone and you didn’t feel any kind of remorse?
“ What if… by being connected to the world, I might be a bad person?” you whispered.
“ That’s your choice. For some people you will be a bad person no matter what you do, no matter what you think.” he looked at his cane before eating the rest of his éclair au chocolat. “ Soldiers killed during war, the winners are seen as heroes, and the losers as cold blooded killers. Who is right? They all killed people, they all did horrible things and yet they aren’t seen as the same. Your father have killed during the war, right? What made him different from an enemy soldier?” 
“ Because… he was fighting for what’s…right..?”
“ Who says?” he tilted his head, always having a gentle expression. He wasn’t judging you, he was just curious about your thoughts. 
You couldn’t find an answer to his questions.
You stayed in silence for a moment, thinking about the man’s words. What was strange, was that his words weren't shaking your morals, but it was making you accept them. You had killed, you wanted to kill again, maybe not as strongly as Alastor, but you wouldn’t be opposed to killing again, if it was to protect. You knew it was the difference between you and Alastor, you would kill to protect while you knew Alastor would kill.. Because he wanted to.
And you accepted it, you accepted him, you accepted yourself. 
You would be the wife to a murderer, maybe he would kill again, maybe not. You didn’t really care. You would be by his side, as promised. 
You opened your eyes, feeling lighter. You didn’t expect to feel burdened by all of this, but maybe, the fact that you were trying to make the wedding happen was a way for you not to think about what happened.
You felt better.
You turned your head toward the man who was looking at the people walking in front of you. They weren’t looking at you, just walking, not even caring about you. You smiled.
“ Thank you. I feel… better.”
“ Is it a good thing?” he asked, amused. You grinned.
“ Well, for my own happiness, yes!”
“ Then, everything is good.”
“ I’m going to meet a friend.. But, can I have your name sir?”
The man stared at you with his usual gentle and wise expression. You waited politely, maybe he thought you were being rude, asking his name out of the blues?
“ Legba.”
You bid your goodbye before walking toward Alice’s home. You were going to encourage her to break free from her chains! She didn’t need to marry a sweaty man, she could handle herself perfectly! You entered the mansion, the butler escorting you once again in the living room. Now, you just need to wait!
You opened your eyes, not even realizing you fell asleep when you heard shouting at the front door. You walked toward the entrance and saw Alice and the sweaty gentleman, your friend was shouting at the man, demanding his departure from her house while he was clearly trying to calm Alice.
“ What is going on?”
“ This man is just a filthy pig! Touching me like I’m some kind of harlot.” she was fuming, trying to contain her rage. What did that man do? The man, who didn’t seem sure of himself became more confident, pointing at Alice.
“ Maybe that’s what you are, kissing the mayor’s daughter like this. What a scoop that would be, unless we come to an agreement of course. I think you would make a darling wife Miss Alice. I’ll let you think about it, and if you need more convincing, I have proof. Now, have a great night ladies.”
And just like that, he left.
Alice closed the door before dropping to her knees, breathing heavily. You took her in your arms, looking for a butler or a maid but nobody was around, which was weird. You tried to calm her but she was panicking.
“ He saw us.. He saw us kiss.. Oh lord, what could happen if he were to open his mouth about it.” she was shaking, nipping at her nails. 
You calmly took her hand with yours.
“ Do you have any way to get rid of him?”
She looked at you, seeming torn to speak before sighing.
“ Don’t think I’m a monster but… Most of the richest families have.. people who do their dirty jobs? Sending… assassins or things like that..? I’ve never done that of course, but I feel so trapped right now… Oh, what Alyzée is going to think.”
“ She won’t need to think about it. Use your assassins.” you wondered if you were shocking her. Maybe you were a little too at ease with the idea of killing someone ?
“ No. They would report everything to my father and if they see the proof… My father would know about me and Alyzée.” she sighed, rubbing her face with her hands. You knew it was dangerous, you knew it could backfire but…
“ What about me?”
“ You? What you?”
“ Do you want me to… ?”
Alice stared at you before laughing so hard she was crying. Or was she crying so hard that she was laughing ?You waited for her to calm down before staring at her.
“ Are you serious ?”
“ Seems like she is.”
You both turned around to find Alastor, standing in front of you, the door open.
“ My dear, we don’t talk about taking trash out at the entrance, I taught you better than that.”  he smiled widely at you. Alice was looking at you then at Alastor, seeming confused. You sighed before helping your friend standing up. “ Is there a place we could talk about getting rid of the trash?” asked Alastor with a beaming grin.
Alice seemed to come back to herself, and she tugged you to her father’s office. She locked the door behind Alastor, staring at you. 
“ Explanation ?”
“ Nothing too serious. You’ve been caught in a big scoop Alice, and you need us to clean the mess you’ve made!” you paled, asking Alastor how did he know, did the bastard already told everyone? “ Oh dear, no, but from Alice’s expression, the only things that could make her so upset would be you or her lovely Alyzée. I took a lucky guess.”
“ Alastor, you are… your father… oh… that explains so much.” Alice let herself drop on her father’s chair. “ So, that’s why you didn’t want me to help to look for his father, because he killed him?” asked Alice, looking at you, confused.
“ We killed him.”
“ Of course you did.” she sighed, putting her head on the desk. “ I need.. a fucking glass of whiskey, I’m not having this conversation sober.” She took a bottle from the cabinet before sitting back in front of you. She poured herself after giving you and Alastor a glass. “ So, let me get this through, you both killed Alastor’s father and now you want to kill the man who knows I’m in love with Alyzée?”
“ Well, Alice, for once you made your brain work. I would almost be shedding a tear if I cared.” said Alastor as he sipped his drink. “ And furthermore, this man is a pig that needs to be slaughtered.”
You felt relaxed. You didn’t know why, but the fact that Alastor was referring to the man as a pig made you feel even less remorse than you could have felt.
“ What are you winning from this?”
“ Nothing–”
“ Doll, I know you don’t want to manipulate me. I know. I’m talking about your murderous husband. He wouldn’t help me freely.”
“ Using your brain for the second time? What a day folks ! It’s simple really, you are at the head of one of the richest families in Louisiana. Having you on my side is a plus.”
“ I’m already at your side–!”
“ No Alice, you could be cutting yourself to prove your faith and I would still doubt you. But a crime, that is a win-win situation. The pig is slaughtered, you are free, my darling and myself are doing what we need and everything is back to normal!” exclaimed Alastor with his usual smile.
“ … Fine.” 
As Alice and Alastor were talking about the contract, you felt shivers down your spine. You closed your eyes, trying to comprehend what was happening. You don’t know why but you remembered Legba’s words. You need to trust your instincts. You couldn’t hear Alice and Alastor anymore, you could hear footsteps… You could hear…a shovel digging into the ground.
“ Darling?” 
You gasped as you felt Alastor hand on your shoulder. What just happened ? They both were looking at you, worried.
“ I’m okay.. I just.. I’m okay.” you nodded, feeling extremely tired all of the sudden. “ Alastor… Where is your father's corpse?”
“ Six feet underground.”
“ I think.. I think we should check it out.”
“ Why dig up dirt from the past?”
“ Because I think someone is trying to dig him up.”
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tbgkaru-woh · 10 months ago
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100 Dialogue prompts
Trying this out (feel free to tweak out any grammatical errors) so writers who are bored, have at it! ♥ Mix of Fluff, Angst and Smut
“I don’t see you that way”
“I will just do as I’m told. As I’ve always done”
“Have you never ridden a bike/horse before?”
“You don’t have to be so…formal”
“What happened to us?”
“Good things don’t happen to me”
“Interested in palm reading?”
“Bowing to you felt right”
“There, let me help you.”
“Next time, listen to yourself and not me”
“Why do you want to get in trouble so badly?”
“It’s him/her…isn’t it?”
“Are you keeping it?”
“Good to see a familiar face”
“You never had to ask me anything, let alone beg”
“Oh you again?!”
“I need to take you somewhere”
“With you gone, everything went wrong”
“Insufferable, see you at dinner”
“I wasn’t kissing you, I was saving your life!”
“You did all this already, why not finish the job?”
“I will look for you”
“I couldn’t see anything, I couldn’t breathe”
“You knew about it?”
“I will atone for what he/she did”
“You need to start having some faith.”
“Say what you want, I know what I’m feeling is right”
“It’s okay, you will move on. We will move on.”
“How much do you miss him/her? And what if you didn’t have to?”
“Focus on my hands, on my voice…”
“Perhaps you need to be reminded where you belong”
“I was fine having a non-sexual relationship with you, but instead I’m having non-relationship sex with him/her.”
“I wanted to do it for you and in hindsight it was a terrible idea”
“I’ve been inside him/her more than outside him/her”
“Don’t ask me with ‘please’, you’re paying me”
“Oh why won’t you just die already”
“Sometimes I wonder for how long have you wanted his/her heart and if you will ever stop”
“Filthy cheater, we go again!”
“Didn’t you pay your debt already?”
“I can’t get sick/injured.”
“You act like you’ve never been defeated”
“Diamond thrown into the trash still has the value of a diamond”
“I got engaged”
“All this was decided for me, I had no choice”
“I’m beginning to think not even the jail guards/cops want you around, given how many times they’ve let me bail you out”
“You, sir/madam, should watch your alcohol intake”
“I’ve been denying everyone, you’re not special”
“I’m not looking for a romance”
“Isn’t that immoral enough to tempt you?”
“We’re two sides of the same fucked up coin”
“That’s what I like to see, you are your parents’ best indeed!”
“You have nothing to lose right?”
“Oh I can’t wait to hear you sing”
“Anything you’d like to add to the conversation?”
“Hi.”
“You need to stop making me pick you up in places someone may see”
“I thought I was a puppeteer pulling the strings but instead I was a back seat audience”
“I want names, I want addresses, I’m gonna make them pay.”
“You know where to find me if you ever want me again.”
“My mother is visiting in like 5 minutes”
“Is it that, or is it because you’re in love with me?”
“Not being able to reciprocate has been the hardest part of my life”
“Did you kill someone?”
“Envious of my youth, are we?”
“The others may have gotten away…”
“I found you. Found you looking like you didn’t want to be found”
“Did we use to be a thing?”
“I can fix this. I can fix this…”
“Weird question, are you a supernatural being? Be honest”
“We should have never played Gods”
“Must you be so harsh with me all the time?”
“What did all these men/women do to deserve you?”
“We have a reputation to uphold”
“May I have this dance?”
“I am a bad influence on you!”
“Let’s make history”
“Who the hell wants to live forever.”
“Feeling any different?”
“Time waits for no one”
“You got your happy-ever-after. And for all I know, it’s because I didn’t.”
“Try that again and you’re gonna lose it”
“Didn’t I say one of these days you’re gonna be the death of me?”
“Do you know what my answer was?”
“You look pathetic.”
“Almost didn’t recognize your voice when it’s not yelling at me”
“I often find myself talking to those no longer here as well”
“Excuse me, this is not a buffet”
“I don’t suspect you because I’m the one who put him/her in the ground”
“You look like someone who likes a good gamble”
“I am poison”
“Feel free to stay as long as you need”
“You don’t need to understand, just be a good little thing”
“I’m gonna need your driver’s license, your ID and your phone number please~”
“Say my name”
“You…are telling the truth”
“Is that why you did that? Back there?”
“Stop reading my mind”
“I can teach you”
“How can you laugh?”
“Pretty pictures. I don’t have any”
“Heaven may fall, but __ can’t die.”
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coffeandgum · 14 days ago
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right now, I am about to make you quit eating junk food forever.
(tw kinda meanspo)
youtube
youtube
After watching these videos, can still eat this trash disguised as food? do you still dare?
if you do, then don't wonder why you feel like trash all day, binge and gain weight..
like come on, stop being an idiot. have you ever wondered why you just cant stop reaching out for these specific foods? why your cravings just don’t seem to go away no matter how much you try? why it feels like you’re being controlled?
well here’s the answer: you are literally being controlled, and you fell into the trap that most people fall into.
these foods are designed to alter the way your brain works, as shown in the first video. you cant even think right anymore! they will turn you into a mindless robot that works for these companies and helps them gain more money. you are a slave to them, it's pathetic.
I’ve been powerless to food my entire life. in the past, almost every single day ended up in a binge. I felt stuck, hopeless, and it seemed like no matter what i did, nothing would change, because I fell back into my old habits as soon as I decided to get rid of them. so I would get depressed, binge on trash like ice cream, chocolate bars, pizza, and believe me, i would take in 5000+ calories a day, not even joking. then, i feel like trash, i decide to start again, fail, go back to the trash, and the cycle goes on. i didn't know what was wrong with me.
but I broke the cycle, and you can too.
I’ve been trash free for more than half a year and I have never felt better, physically and mentally. my diet consists of clean food only, and i dont miss the ultra processed bullshit, not one bit. i would rather die than have it enter my body ever again. and to sum it up:
I’ve lost more than 12kg while eating the same amounts, even more, but of course I take in VERY less calories.
My mental health issues disappeared, I’m not even joking. last year I was diagnosed with adhd, ocd and anxiety disorder. even my psychiatrist is impressed because I was in such a bad place at that time, and I managed to heal on my own, just by fixing my habits and diet.
I don’t remember the last time i binged. and when i did, it wasn’t even a “huge” binge, i ate a maximum of 2000cal (my maintenance calories), because i was binging on fruits and veggies, so i wasn’t even gaining even on my worst days.
It has never been easier to say no to food. I have control because i am aware of what I want inside my body.
my body is more toned and my blood tests show significant improvement. my skin, hair and nails are healthier and better looking.
I rarely crave unhealthy foods. i said rarely because sometimes during my period i get some cravings, but they dont feel as strong as before. and if i craved anything at all, it would be something like a fruit. i literally prefer fruits over any dessert because they taste better to me. it feels like my taste buds are rejecting the processed foods and added sugar. like my taste buds are so used to real sweetness like fruit, that when i eat something like a chocolate bar, its always a disappointment, because it doesnt taste as good as i imagined it to be! its almost crazy.
there’s no secret. just quit throwing trash in your body. feed it what it actually needs. pairing good nutrition with consistent workout is the best thing you can do to yourself. it will literally heal you inside out and you will fix your broken brain, that has been ruined by the junk you’ve been eating.
clean your food, clean your body. it's time to be aware!
if you have any questions or need advice, feel free to ask, id be happy to help. <3
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winterspiderpurrs · 2 months ago
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The post was getting a little long BUT @illogicalkat and @smidnite are so amazing for this!
Previous posts from the last addition done here:
And cause I loved it.... imma add a little more :D
*********************************************************
Steve went to get Sarah; his mom on the phone. She was always a voice of reason with him. He was hopefully she could shed some positive light in this situation.
"-That child has known you practically his whole life. You're his papa. Doesn’t matter what some... DNA test says A leanbh. " her Irish accent became more prominent, the more she talked.
" But a man has a right to his child. I know it's going to be hard. And poor Peter! Having to face that man again! I woulda hit him!"
Steve coughed a little and rubbed the back of his neck.
" Well, uuhh.. no problem there."
" Steve Grant Rogers Barnes! That temper of yours is always getting you in trouble!"
" Ma!"
" Could be making the situation worse."
" I know, Ma, I know..."
Steve could hear her sigh on the other side of the phone.
" Well. Was it at least a good hit?"
Steve laughs and moves back toward the dining room where Peter and Matt are still at.
" Yeah, it was a -"
Clatter.
The phone slipped from Steve's hand as he stared at Peter.
~
While Steve had wondered off to speak to him mom, Bucky had gone back up stares to check on Harley and May after seeing that Tony had gotten in the car and was a long ways away from the house.
Peter gathered up the paper they had, scanning it over to Matt's office for him so he could review it again in Braille once he got it to his special machine.
" I uuhh... have another question since it's just us."
" Of course. What is it?"
Matt tilted his head toward Peter, sensing that he was nervous again.
" I umm read before that you cannot uhh get divorced if your... pregnant?"
Matt blinks.
" Oh,"
Peter nervously gathers the papers and puts the extra copies in Matt's briefcase for him.
" It's not his. Obviously, but umm, I just wanted to be sure."
Matt smiles and shakes his head.
" You're fine. The state of New York lets you. And as he has no rights to you anymore... you're safe. Congratulations."
Peter smiled in relief and pressed a hand to his stomach. Laughing a little.
" Yeah... I just found out last week. Was gonna wait a few more weeks. Before saying anything to Steve and Bucky. This one definitely was an oops surprise pregnancy."
Clatter.
Peter and Matt turn toward the door to see Steve standing there staring. Cell phone on the floor.
" You're pregnant?!?"
Meanwhile, upstairs, Harley is pacing his room. Why would THE Tony Stark be here? Was it for Dads metal arm that Mom helped create? Was it the scholarship program his school had?
Was he coming to expand his art collection with one of Papa's paintings? Mom had gone back to school and gotten his degree and had written a couple of papers. But would that be enough to get Tony Stark's attention?
He looks at the magazines cut out he had of Tony Stark from a few years ago when he was on the cover of Time magazine. Dad had bought it for him while they were in line at the store. He frowns a little. Now recalling the wide-eyed stare his Mom had when he came into the room and saw it the first time. He seemed oddly nervous when he asked where that came from and why he had it.
The look on Tony Stark's face downstairs, he seemed scared, nervous, and hopeful?
He pulled his laptop up and hesitated a moment. Then he started typing away.
' Young Tony Stark photos'
The more he looked, the bigger the pit in his stomach grew.
He felt like he was going to throw up.
Across town, Tony was once again looking through the paperwork and looked at the copy of the birth certificate.
Father spot was blank on it.
But when he saw the name on the certificate, he rushed towards the trash can and threw up. It all just became too much. Everything that he was robbed of. And how much at least at the time of Harley birth that Peter obviously cared for him deeply.
Harley Edwin Anthony Parker.
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knightyoomyoui · 6 months ago
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[COMMISSION] LIVING WITH VAMPIRES: UNDER THE VEIL OF NIGHT  | TWICE x Male Reader | CHAPTER 1: "A Nightmarish First Encounter"
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Welcome to another brand new TWICE fic series of mine! This story will serve both as an adaptation and a soft reboot of the TWICE horror-comedy book titled “Living With Vampires” written by SaiDaChae29 published in 2020 which was sadly left discontinued until this day. For this one, it scrapped some of the parts from the original while others were kept and applied changes which will lead to its direct continuation. Special mention also to @nchris00 who ordered a commission and entrusted me to recreate this interesting story as his request. Hope this one won’t disappoint! Thank you so much again! -> Read the PROLOGUE here <- “LIVING WITH VAMPIRES: UNDER THE VEIL OF NIGHT” By knightyoomyoui Commissioned by: @nchris00 Part: CHAPTER 1 : "A Nightmarish First Encounter" Word Count: 5,879
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2 YEARS AGO
I knocked at the house where there was an old man living in there that I used to help throwing the garbage every night. As he opened the door, he greeted me with a curious gaze as soon as he saw me standing in front of his doorway.
“Jeonghoon? What is it?”
“Uhh hey pops uhm… I was just wondering if you have some extra food left there?” It took some courage to ask that from him, since this is my first time begging from somebody straight into their home for some food to eat. Also, I just did this now from him because he only just know me as a hobo who helps people throw trash in their neighboorhood.
“I already ate the leftovers that I collected few days ago so… if you won’t mind, can I-”
“You came at the right time, Jeonghoon. Ofcourse I will.” He nodded understandably after cutting off my words. I didn’t find it disrespectful at all now that he responded the same thing I was expecting for him to say to me.
He left me in his doorway to grab something from his kitchen. I heard some metal clanging and probably procelains, maybe grabbing something from the plates. I was curious but I remained in his doorway, without any intention to come inside and do something that would break his trust.
Because I will never do that. I may have know how it feels to lose something… but just because it happened worse to me that doesn’t mean I have to make others feel what I felt.
It’s painful, enough to have your life get destroyed in an instant.
Which is what I’ve been going through these days. Imagine I was having these things for me too until that person I thought would be the nicest one among everyone took it all away from me and didn’t spare nothing.
I didn’t noticed I was too occupied at my thoughts when pops here even had to pat my chest twice to steal my attention. “Hey, are you okay young guy? You must be spacing out.”
“Oh u-uhm… I-I’m really sorry pops, I didn’t heard what you said.”
“No don’t worry, I just called your name repeatedly and you can’t hear me, so I checked up on you and I found you hear staring at nothing.” The old man waves it off for me. I looked at his hands and he was carrying a tupperware of the food he cooked for dinner.
“I cooked too much that I wasn’t able to finish it all, that’s why I said that you came here at the right time because I feel a bit dismayed at leaving this extra for tomorrow.” Pops said to me. He handed it to me and I accepted it.
“Do you want to eat here?”
“I would be honored, pops but I think i’m fine out there. I would like to grab some fresh air afterwards.” 
He nodded and he took my answer well. “Okay, eat well Jeonghoon.”
“Thanks a lot again, pops. Good night.”
“You too, kid.”
I bowed again to double the respect I have for his kindness and he smiled softly for me because I helped him close the door. I looked at the beef steak he has for me and probably this is the first day since I lost a home that I smiled with pure genuine.
I looked for some spare bench here along the road and thankfully I found one where I can sit and enjoy this meal I have tonight. I opened the container and smelled the food, oh it was surely mouth-watering and fragrant. 
I prayed as my gratitude to have this kind of food despite of my poor situation. Without wasting much time, I grabbed the spoon he gave for me and I ate my dinner in less than three minutes, an effect of the hunger I was tried to hold onto since earlier.
After I finished my dinner, I went to my scraps to place this in a plastic so that I can return this to pops tomorrow. Then I went back at the spot where I decided to sleep along with my carton as my sleeping mat to make myself more comfortable.
I laid on the couch and stared at the stars above, deeply wondering what the future still awaits for me even after my life had its rock bottom state. Will I still be able to save myself and get back up to slowly reclaim what I never lost in the first place or… if I will be lucky…
Is there someone else out there who will be willing to lend me a hand and assist me with it?
I don’t know exactly, but not gonna lie I don’t lose hope yet. Well, I just think that’s what I should do while I’m still breathing and living you know? I don’t want to waste this opportunity yet, that’s why i have to find a way to look for something that will add more purpose of why i’m living right now. 
I still believe that just because we lost something in our life doesn’t mean we remain worthless forever. 
Anyways, enough of these deep thoughts. I just want to relax myself and call this a day. I just hope there’s a karma awaiting for that person who made me like this. There’s no instances that someone can just ran away freely after doing something reckless to others who did nothing wrong to them.
I closed my eyes and breathe deeply before I let my body soak into slumber.
However, few hours later I suppose, well since I don’t have a watch or a clock -I do have my phone with me but it’s still lowbat since I didn’t get to have my charger with me when I got abandoned-, my ears caught something irritating that woke my senses back up even if it doesn’t want to yet since it’s still midnight.
It was gibberish loud and since it’s slightly audible, I can tell that those noises were coming just nearby from me. I slowly opened my eyes and I blinked rapidly as I try to hear the noises again that caused my peaceful sleep to be rudely interrupted.
I groaned as my reaction before I stood back up. The sound became much clearer now, and I grabbed some of the words they’re talking about. Not being overly interested in gossips, but I do caught that they’re talking about ‘paying something because it’s already due’ thingie.
I looked around to find out what it is, and what I saw didn’t gave me a surprise, it just explained why the sound was so close to me.
There are three kids being cornered by a tandem of intimidating guys cornering them from left to right as they ask them about something.
They’re too busy at what they’re talking about so I tried to hid myself from the nearby lamppost to eavesdrop their conversation more.
“That’s a part of our deal, and we told you that each of us would respect our rules and roles here. We let you borrow our money… and you have to pay us back on the due date.” The guy on the right said, and he’s talking directly at that tallest kid who looks like he’s protecting those two little kiddos he has with him from them.
“I’m telling you sir please, I’m going to pay for it I know about that! It’s just that what I’ve been saving as of now isn’t enough yet to reach that amount.” He replied while trembling in fear.
“And do you think it’s a good thing that even if you don’t want your deadline to pass, you have no choice but to let it? Do we look like we are nice enough to give a second chance?” The left guy said, stepping forward to scare the three kids more.
I understood their situation now. So this kid took a loan agreement with them and these guys are the sharks who are trying to collect the money they gave to the kid as per the agreement says. I get it that they’re just following the rules but… does it really have to come this way?
“Look kid, you better do something right now to pay what you requested for us or else… we are the ones who will look for an alternative.”
“And hey man, I think I know what we should took rather.” He grinned evilly at his partner on the right before his sight landed on the kids.
He tried to reach the arm of that little guy but the tallest one sways his hand away to avoid having contact with the kid. “Get your hands off from them!”
Wait… oh no, are they thinking about the kids being the substitute payment for this guy’s balance?
“Then pay us right now or else you won’t be going to see these rats ever again!”
“No please, I’m begging you leave them out of this!” He shook his head and tried to rid them away while pleading for mercy.
“Shut up!” The left dude pulled his wavering hand at them and shoo-ed him away from the kids. My eyes largened and felt nervous for this guy and what these dudes would do to the poor kids who are crying now in fear.
“THEY HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!!!”
“WELL THEY ARE NOW, BECAUSE YOU BROUGHT THEM INTO THIS MESS YOU SHOULD’VE AVOIDED IF ONLY YOU COULD’VE PAID US!” The right dude locked his grip on this kid’s slim arm. It tried to force himself out of the hold until this kid tried to bit his knuckle, making the dude scream in pain.
“AAAAISSSHHH, YOU LITTLE DEVIL!” He shook his hand before looking at the kid dangerously and unexpectedly slapped its face.
“No… NO!!!” The guy tried to approach the dude but he only received a huge blow onto his midsection, shutting him off. 
I couldn’t take this sight anymore, so I have to do something for these younglings. I know I’m not that much of a skilled person when it comes to self-defense or challenging somebody in a combat but… I can’t just let these kids to end up somewhere with fate unknown in the hands of these bastards.
Stupidly, I quickly went out of my hiding and tensely approached the dudes who are double-teaming the tall guy before they try to bring the kids with them. I noticed also that the black van that is parking on the side of the road belongs to them.
“HEY! Didn’t you heard what he said!” My puny self yelled at them with bent toughness. “He said they have nothing to do with your problem, so leave them alone!” I said while I eyed the kids who are looking at me right now with their pitiful watery eyes.
“And who the fuck are you?”
“It doesn’t matter. I’m just a random guy on the streets that you two bitchasses ruined his sleep with your annoying rumblings.” I said with much confidence with them. This is the hilarious thing about me, I’m so brave at trashtalking bullies but when they come at me, I’m like a flower who easily covers itself for protection.
In short, I don’t know how to fight back with fists. Great.
“Well, is that so? We don’t give a shit about your beauty sleep, so turn around now, mind your business and you can get yourself back to your little sleep because we’re almost done here. How about that?” The left dude said as he tugged the hair of the tall guy’s hair, making him yelp at the sting it must have caused on his scalp.
I hissed irritably at the stubbornness of this loser. I sighed deeply then went back to arguing with them when I noticed that the dudes were about to carry the kids with them through the van. The tall guy looked at me, crying and pleaded.
“Please… mister… they can’t get away…”
“TYLER!!!” An old man suddenly shouted this guy’s name. I saw that he just came out of the door from this huge looking place. Then I figured out it’s name plastered on top of the entrance.
“ORPHANAGE”
Wait a minute? Orpha- so these kids are orphans? Now I know why this Tyler guy is so protective with these kids and highly concerned for them. Plus, their home is actually just right in front of them! That means they were about to head home when these bad dudes blocked them off from doing so.
“HEY, W-WHERE ARE THEY TAKING THEM!” The old guy saw the dudes carrying the kids who are crying and trying to wiggle off in their arms to escape.
I looked at them and breathe drelpy before I let my urges control me.
I ran immediately and just before they’re about to open the sliding door of their van, I pushed them both off into the ground, while apologetically involving the kids on the ground. I just thought that it’s the better way to stop them by getting distracted at the kids bodies colliding with them as they fall.
“GO, RUN!” I commanded the kids who were a bit confused at what I just did. I looked at both of them and they got my signal. They stumbled to stand but luckily they are able to ran back from Tyler and the old man. 
“You son of a bitch, look what you just did!” The dude who is laying down beneath me suddenly kicked me on the leg, effectively making me kneel on the ground at how painful it is to endure while standing.
As I was busy seething off the pain, the other dude took the advantage by blowing me in the back of the head with his hammered fists. I faceplanted on the ground and then I felt my entire body filled with shots coming from their attacks.
They kicked me with pure despise. It stopped for a while until I felt by body getting rolled and face up, the dude straddled me and gave me repeated punches to the face before my sight went blurred and complete black.
My eyes suddenly sprung up, and what greeted me was a view of a girl who seemed like she flinched a little when my eyes opened. Her head is upside down, so I figured that she’s looking at me from the edge of… wait, am I laying down on a couch?
“Jihyo-unnie! There’s a man sleeping on our couch!!!” The girl suddenly shouted for her Jihyo-unnie. I guess that was her sister or something but hold up, where was I?!
I made the hardest and most painful sat-up I ever did in my entire life, as I feel like my abdomen are tightening while I’m doing it. My head also feels a little dizzy so I groaned and hold it for support before I turned around.
And where the hell was I? Why am I in a very cozy looking room filled with women sitting around in front of me.
What I first noticed was the girl who is staring at me upside down, she is indeed on the edge of the couch on my side looking suspicious at me with her knitted brows.
Then on the other hand was the rest of the girls with her. The first one is wearing a purple T-shirt with a girl character on its chest, she’s watching the TV in the floor along with the pale-looking girl who I can almost compare her similarity to Snow White because of how bright her skin was.
The other ones on the couch were this girl with long legs, wolfcut haired, and in black t-shirt building a Lego figure on a table and the one beside her is a very gorgeous looking one with uhm… enticing thighs, sitting like a ball and very focused on her phone.
I seriously don’t know who are these girls and why did I end up here, but for now I’ll just leave what will happen to me based on their actions… but ofcouse that doesn’t mean I won’t do something about it.
“W-who are you?” I asked the long-hair girl with tattoos. “And how did I end up here?”
“I was about to ask the same thing about you, Mr. Nobody.” She crossed her eyes and popped the bubble gum she was chewing. “We just woke up and I just went down when we found you here laying so comfortably here in our dorm like it’s yours.”
Dorm?
Where in the blue hell am I actually am right now, seriously?
“What did you say? A dorm?” I asked her again.
“Yeah! Are you deaf or something?”
“I seriously don’t know this place. I don’t even have any idea why I’m here!” I felt embarassed when my raising voice accidentally caught the other girl’s attention, and now they’re looking at me with curiousity.
“Oh, he’s awake!” The girl in purple said. She doesn’t seemed to be frightened that a stranger is on a room with her friends, she rather sounds glee about it.
“Look wait, let me explain-”
“Tell that to her instead.” Chaeyoung flicked her head back when she sensed that a footstep is growing near from us. “Jihyo- unnie!!!”
“Yes yes I’m coming Chae, jeez.” This Jihyo said to her, sounding like she’s so done at this girl’s whiny voice. Oh, didn’t I just heard this tattoo girl’s name to be Chae?
While i was awaiting at this Jihyo’s arrival, Chae decided to scare me off with her gesturing me with her index finger that tells me I’m screwed… which was kinda effective and not at the same time because I don’t even know what this Jihyo can do and… her giving death warning isn’t suitable for a short girl like her with cute features.
I gulped but I hid my nervousness by glancing at her cluelessly at her. Then, a figure stood beside Chae, a short-girl one with large round eyes, almost had me questioning if she’s actually Korean or she’s half.
She was about to ask Chae but her eyes landed at me and just like how Chae greeted me when I woke up, she shared the same judgmental look.
“Who are you and what are you doing here in our place?”
“You asked exactly the same thing as this girl right here.” I pointed at Chae. “And I can’t give the answer as for you too, because I don’t even know how did I end up here.” I shrugged.
“Are you sure about that?” She raised her eyebrow to me, unsure if I was speaking the truth.
“She’s probably speaking lies, Jihyo-unnie! Who knows, maybe this idiot is an intruder!”
“Intruder?! I don’t even know how to lockpick or climb walls!” I said to this brat over here as I felt offended.
“Well guessing from that look of yours and how mysterious your identity are, you should be considered as one.” She traced my appearance from head and toe, as if she’s wondering why such a being like me is existing in this world.
“Look, I’m not as dumb as you think I am. I am very aware that such a hobo like me wouldn’t have even a slightest chance to enter or hell, own a dorm such luxurious as this!”
“Both of you, silence your mouths!” Jihyo stops me and Chae from having a war of words. “Chaeyoung is right, you better give us something you know or else we don’t have a choice but to call security and forcefully get you out of here.”
“Wait wait, I don’t know how but I’ll just tell you instead what I know!” I paused her after this irritating Chaeyoung even handed Jihyo her phone. She’s so obvious of making me look like I’m not very welcome here in their territory.
“But first uhm… where is your bathroom?” I said as my expression softened after sheepishly admitting that the nature is calling for my reproductive organs to release something in effect of my hydration.
“And what are you gonna do in there?” Jihyo questions me.
“She’s probably gonna try to run away, Jihyo unnie! Quick girls, block the-”
“I JUST WANT TO HAVE A BATHROOM BREAK, PLEASE.” I said as I hold my kidney spot tight, constricting my legs as I hold on my pee.
“Oh.” Jihyo reacted. “Cmon, Chae as if he’s gonna be out here by his own. Our lock is equipped with passcode remember?” She said as she patted Chaeyoung’s shoulder who seems sulking that she was proven wrong. “Anyways, the bathroom is on the right, you can see the hallway down here.”
“T-thanks”, I immediately stood up and bowed at them thankfully before I went for the location of it.
As I already reached the kitchen which is where the hallway that Jihyo mentioned was near at, I noticed that there’s another girl coming from upstairs coming rushing down and went for the fridge. She even ignored me as she just passed by at me.
I just gave her the same treatment and walked through the bathroom door but just as I was about to grab the knob and opened it, I heard what she said from behind that grabbed my attention.
“Ahhh… oh a fresh blood in the morning after a hangover is incomparably great!” 
I turned my body around slowly to look at Nayeon after what she just said, just want to confirm it if she’s joking or something.
But what I found out after was instead something much more serious to be like that.
I saw Nayeon holding a transparent pitchel filled with red substance on it while gulping its content with a glass on her other hand. She was kneeling in front of the open fridge.
It was like in the movies where a protagonist gets a camera shot where his or her figure gets zoomed in while the background shrinks as soon as that character finds something mind-blowing, that’s what it looked like to mr when I felt chills in my body.
“Nayeon, hurry up! I want that blood already!”
How in the fuck can they just pronouce that they are consuming blood so casually?! It’s nit even normal at all?!
Or else…
As Nayeon followed the voice where it came from, she caught my figure standing in the middle of the hallway, watching her in horror at the strange act she’s doing. I wished she didn’t even stopped, because she terrified me further when she leans away the glass from her, revealing her blood stained mouth.
“What the fuck… are you?” 
She stood up and left the kitchen as she starts walking towards me. I hurriedly turned the doorknob but it was locked. My heart beats even faster as I got confused and even more desperate to get myself away from this bloodlust woman.
It only stopped when my vision went back to pitch black as I couldn’t control my movement anymore.
I have no idea how long I snapped out, but in an instant i just recovered my consciousness back in this comfy couch again. This time, they aren’t around to be seen in what it seems to be their living room. However, I heard clanging noises from the back, I peeked to see what it is and there they actually are, all seated on their dining table with plates and foods all around their table.
The wolfcut girl was distributing the spoons for her roommates while the short-haired woman was assisting her on scooping up the foods for them. I was just silently watching them when someone caught.
“You’re back.” A girl that I haven’t seen yet spoke me as she faced her sitting posture onto me.
I just stared at us and she probably figured out that I haven’t met or know her yet. She chuckled and smiled as she realized it. “Join us.”
Her soft voice and elegant moves piqued my interest on her. She looks so gentle and very nice to get along with. Out of all the girls who I saw, my attention was pinned sharply at her. She just lets out an unexplainable aura that carries me to her.
I nodded and I stood up, which again caught their focus. Chaeyoung’s bright face turned back into an intense and angsty mood when she noticed me back alive again. Jihyo just looked at me seriously but my eyes averted more at this girl named Nayeon who was somehow avoiding her face at me.
I felt my heartbeat quicken again which caused my head to ache and feel a bit dizzy. I almost stumble but thankfully, the wolfcut girl caught my back. “You okay?”
“My head is a bit spiraling, but I’m good.”
“Yeah it’s better to eat first. I’ll give you a medicine after.”
She was about to direct me to their table but then I refused. “S-sorry, but can I go now? I don’t even have to be here, I’m sorry again for the incovenience that I caused-”
“Don’t disrespect unnie like that, now follow her and sit with us!” I didn’t expected that those inviting words, even though they were sounded a bit rude… came from Chaeyoung herself. I looked at her with shame and I just nodded in defeat. I don’t even want to try making this girl’s blood boil more if I already feeling weak.
Oh, great. Speaking about the blood.
As I slowly make my seat, my eyes are still staring at Nayeon who seems uncomfortable now with my look. I try to stop it but at the same time I’m just completely puzzled and disgusted at what I caught from her earlier.
“You can join us for breakfast, because what we learned about you gave me a bit of an assurance that there’s nothing wrong with you.” Jihyo said as she grabbed her spoon and fork before she nodded at the person in front of her from the distance to proceed as she starts eating her food.
It turns out to be the elegant girl sitting with the wolfcut girl and the one with tattoos beside her. “May we know your name first?” she asked me.
“J-Jeonghoon. Min Jeonghoon.”
“Do you remember how did you end up here in our dorm?”
I stopped for a while as I attempt to recall the last scenarios I’ve gone through, which was from last night… but it was like some sort of a missing puzzle pieces, because I couldn’t remember it entirely.
“A bit. All I know is just I beat up some guys because I caught them trying to abduct the siblings of this kid that they intimidate. I’m pretty sure I got knocked out, but… I really don’t know how am I now here, in this type if place with you all.” I explained.
“Someone brought you here with us. That person found you unconscious outside with a badly beaten body.” Jihyo starts to enlighten out the things I temporarily forgot.
“And you should be thanking right now at her.” She glanced back at the elegant girl who just smiled at me and nodded back. My eyes widened when I understood that she was the one who saved me. 
“I’m sorry if you haven’t met me a while ago when you woke up, I just went for some exercise in our gym.” She bowed her head. “My name’s Mina, and I’m the one who brought you here.”
“W-wait, but how…” 
“Since you couldn’t remember when you went through last night, I was a friend with the old guy who owns the orphanage and a guardian of those three kids you saved out there.” She started to narrate what previously happened. 
“He called me along with the police because well… lets say he knows me as someone he can entrust a lot about.” Mina shrugged. “I volunteered to get you healed here while the old guy reported the incident to the police so… that’s the reason how you end up here in our place.” 
I felt relieved and contented that I have an idea now of what I just did, that I was also responsible actually of bringing myself into here, sharing a room with these 9 girls that even though I never met them in my entire life, they seem to be good people and I can somehow try to connect and make myself trustworthy to them… in return of what Mina did to me.
“We learned from Tyler, the kid you saved that they were caught by the loan sharks and you went there to stop them from kidnapping his fellow orphans in exchange of his unpaid balance.” Jihyo said. “And your kind deed was enough to make me convince that maybe you’re not actually what we hope you won’t be. That’s why we talked about even thought Chaeyoung here was… still hesitant-”
“We still don’t know him, unnie! I won’t still trust him around us.” Chaeyoung rolled her eyes as she spatted a toxic gaze at her before returning to her food.
“Exactly what I was saying, but she was still right. We may be appreciating what you did for the kids Jeonghoon but… you got to prove us more. We still don’t know much with you yet.”
“But you’re now welcome to interact with us.” The wolfcut haired girl spoke to me with a nice smile. I felt grateful that they gave me a chance somehow even thought I ended up looking weird for them.
“Thank you so much, I will do my best, I promise.” I said to them, bowing respectfully. 
I started to eat along with them. While I was savoring how delicious the food was, my eyes caught this girl that I last seen drinking blood. I still can’t get it out of my head. As I get drown fron my curiosity, all of us flinched and got a mini heart attack when she suddenly stood up and slammed her fist on the table, towering at me with her deadly stare.
“CAN YOU STOP LOOKING WITH ME, I COULDN’T EAT PEACEFULLY WITH YOUR STARES! IF YOU WANT TO ASK ME ALREADY ABOUT THE BLOOD I DRANK EARLIER, THEN FREAKING DO IT ALREADY!”
All of us went silent while I found the other girl with bangs slapped her head frustratingly. We locked into a staring contest until Jihyo slids between.
“Nayeon! Calm down!”
“What did you just said, Nayeon unnie?!” Wolfcut asked her older friend which revealed to be her name as Nayeon. Her voice has sn evident disbelief in it. 
Nayeon realized what she just accidentally released in her mouth, so she quickly covered it with her palm as she nervously looked around at us especially to Jihyo.
“I-I’m sorry… I-”
“You heard her right.” I said as I still confronted Nayeon. “I caught Nayeon drinking blood from the fridge, even complimenting that it was the best thing to aid hangover.”
All of them gasped and this girl beside me who was using her phone earlier clicked her tongue thrice. Wait, did I mentioned already that she looks like the tallest of them all? Well, excluding me because her head is leveled just right on my shoulder.
“Do you girls know about this? Why is she drinking blood? What are you girls hiding from me?”
They all went suspiciously silent for a moment, my fear and nervousness is increasing my heartbeat’s rate at this point, being beware of their secret that hides their true identity.
“W-wait, Jeonghoon can you give us a minute to t-talk?”
“No more time needed, just tell me right away!” I stood up, feeling alarmed at them. They all posed a taken aback expression at my frightful demeanor.
“Are you girls belong in some crazy ass cult or what? Because you girls didn’t disposed the fact that she drank blood means one thing only that you girls know about this and this just seems normal to yall. Thinking that you girls ain’t normal makes me wanna leave this room already!”
“Jeonghoon, please wait!”
They all stood up at the same time, which even looked like more creepy to me. I stepped backwards, being defensive for myself. “NO! DON’T YOU DARE TAKE ANY MORE STEP COME NEAR ME!”
I looked at the door at the near end of the hallway, which helped me to plan what I have to do after. I gotta get out of this place as they all soon to come after me. I better hurry out and ran as fast as I can.
Just as I had a plan formulated in my mind, the elegant girl took our attention when she suddenly yelled that I couldn’t even consider if she actually yelled because of how light like a feather her voice was.
“W-we are v-vampires, that’s why!”
They all gasped unbelievably at their friend who just exposed and retreated at their guilt.
“MINA! WHY DID YOU SAY IT?!” The bangs girls got infuriated at her.
“I-I just couldn’t take it anymore. I can’t lie!”
“Shit… you all are…” I looked at them and soon the sight of them looking like these precious set of women goes shifting into this unimaginable monsters that I never wanted to come across with.
“Oh god… so that’s probably why you all took me, to feed me to become more healthy… so that later tonight you all can eat me and have my blood huh! You girls like the dark and a fresh blood, like what that girl said!” I hauntingly said while pointing at Nayeon who lowered her head, probably felt pain at my accusation.
“Guess what, you all can’t have it. Because I’M GETTING OUT OF HERE!”
“GIRLS, GET HIM!
I moved as fast as I can, sprinting to the door and tried to open it. I looked back to see all the girls except Jihyo, the wolfcut one, Nayeon, and the thighs girl not joining the rest who is chasing after me.
I realized that there’s a keypad underneath the knob. I remembered that Chaeyoung told me that I have no chance of getting out of here because their door is secured with a pass code.
OH SHIT! 
“HELPPP!!! HELP ME!!!”
I pounded the door as loud as I can before I felt the bangs girls tackled my lower part and pulled my legs, sliding me to the ground with my front colliding on the floor.
Meanwhile, Jihyo and the wolfcut girl was talking about something when I saw the tall girl suddenly speak with them.
“Just tell him the truth, unnie. We can’t do anything about it already. It’s too late.”
“Nowhere to run, Jeonghoon!” Chaeyoung said to me before she maniacally smugs and laughs. I saw a glimpse of her fangs growing wiith her pupils shrinking and eyes glowing into color red.
“GET OFF ME!!! NO, PLEASE!!! SOMEBODY SAVE M-RAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!
The three of them just watched the rest pulled my body away from the door as I clawed in the front while screaming in dread and terror, with my fate unknown being at the possession of these girls who turned out to be vampires in disguise.
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suiana · 9 months ago
Text
(yandere! teddy bear x gn! reader) (written in the pov of the yan⁉️⁉️ wanted to try something new)
i was your first friend.
i was there for you when you grew up.
i was there for you when you had tough times.
so how could you throw me away like this?
throwing me away like some... common trash. do you know how i felt when you no longer wanted me? when you used me, loved me...then suddenly said that you'd throw me away? i was beyond heartbroken. i absolutely refused to believe it.
i was your childhood friend after all.
you promised me you'd always love me.
promised.
i don't know how long i spent there, laying there in the trash with my heart torn open. the rain drenched me, watered me in its tears as i wondered what i did wrong. what i did wrong for you to throw me away after so many years spent together.
then i realized,
you grew up.
your tastes changed.
and you no longer liked the way i appeared. well, maybe. you never specified anything, but it had to be that! why else would you throw me away?
so i got blessed by some merciful god. obtained a human body and... came back for you. you, you, you.
it's always been you. it always will be you.
and everything was fine at first! it was great! you loved me and i loved you, just like how things were back then!
...
but then why do you look so frightened now?
why are you telling me to leave you?
all i did was bring up a happy memory we both shared years ago! why are you so scared? why are you looking at me like some sort of... monster?
i know i came back in the blood of someone who was trying to hurt you... but all I'm doing is trying to protect you! that's all I've ever wanted!
please don't leave me again.
oh please, please don't.
you don't understand how painful it was to be without you.
...
no, you can't leave me.
i refuse to let it happen.
I won't let you throw me away again.
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moralesmilesanhour · 1 year ago
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if you believe in me - 01
summary: You and Miles decide to make it official. Kind of. wc: 763 warnings: none a/n: I love setting my characters up for failure <3
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Miles hadn't texted you at all since the kiss, but not for lack of trying.
He would begin to type out a message:
"hi".
No, too empty. Perhaps a bit creepy. 
Backspace.
"hey :)"
Would you expect him to use smiley faces? No, it felt too different to how he spoke in real life. Backspace.
Maybe he should rip a page out of his classmates' playbook. It always seemed to work for them when he peered over at their screens.
"wyd?"
He frowned at his phone in bewilderment. Why would he ask that all of a sudden with no context? 
Backspace. 
"Hey, Y/N! Just checking in to see how you're doing."
Miles mentally cursed himself when he realized how much the text sounded like an email.
He flopped down onto his bed in defeat, and checked his digital alarm clock. 7:30 pm. He had been sitting there for an entire half hour and could hardly get a greeting out, probably leaving you to wonder why the boy who had literally kissed you last week couldn’t be bothered to send a text. 
Miles knew that today would be special when his phone alarm actually woke him up - and from a dreamless sleep, at that. Normally the sun would practically blind him after the curtains were thrown open by his mother, yelling frantically about how he was going to be late in half an hour. The sky was miraculously just turning a periwinkle blue outside, and the possibility of actually getting breakfast seemed within reach for once.
Miles squinted to read the menu above him. Ordering a spicy beef patty before 8 in the morning sounded like a poor dietary decision, so he went with a bacon egg and cheese sandwich like everyone else. As soon as he backed up from the counter, he made the mistake of glancing to his right at the fridge containing drinks on the other side of the bodega, and his stomach dropped.
Your jacket was instantly recognizable, even from a mile away.
Miles threw on his hoodie and shuffled over to the aisle behind him, where he pretended to be preoccupied with a container of instant coffee while trying to keep his face covered. When he saw movement in his periphery, he ducked his head and inched his way towards the freezer that contained his prized can of Arizona tea. He was about to reach for the handle, just inches away from success, when your voice stopped him:
“Morales?!? Where the hell have you been?”
Fuck.
“Hey,” Miles gave you a tight smile as he turned slowly to face you. “How…how are you?”
“I’m good,” you nodded, before lightly smacking him in the arm. “Haven’t heard from you in a minute, though. Why I ain’t catch you in class?”
The boy shrugged. “I dunno. Still in the same seat every day. Maybe you just missed me.”
As he said this, Miles recalled seeing you in the cafeteria while making his way upstairs  the other day and ducking behind a trash can before your eyes could meet. You having gone back to your regular seat in AP Calc made avoidance even easier; he could simply time when he went over to his seat, a small crowd of students providing ample cover.
“Chopped cheese!” a man called out from the front, interrupting his thoughts.
“That’s me,” you said with a grin. 
“”Bacon egg and cheese!”
“And that’s me,” Miles replied as he spun around to retrieve his order, making sure to leave room for you to pass behind him after grabbing your sandwich.
Once outside, he realized that you were staring at him. Not just in passing, but expectantly. Was he meant to do something?
“What?” he asked, eyebrow raised.
“You like me, right?”
“I-um…yeah,” Miles’ eyes darted away from your face. “I don’t think I’d kiss anybody I didn’t like.”
“Don’t get smart with me, you didn’t text me at all afterwards. I was starting to get the wrong impression!”
He snorted, “Well, now you’ve got the right one.”
“Sooo…” you tilted your head. “Does that mean we’re like, a thing now?”
He tensed at the suggestion. ‘A thing’. You’d think it was obvious what that meant, but what did it really mean in tenth grade? Sit at home and kiss a lot? 
But your smile began to falter the longer he took, and the sight stung him.
“I guess we are,” Miles finally replied. He looked down. “What are you doing?”
“Holding your hand, duh!”
He let you intertwine your fingers with his, tentatively squeezing them in return.
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oneforthemunny · 7 months ago
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hiya Evie! happy April!
feel free to toss this one out in the trash if you've already covered it before but I saw a tiktok the other day of people talking about their pregnancy hormones and the rage/sobbing and how they were genuinely writing up divorce papers over their husband eating their medium fry or crying hard because the quesadilla they woke him up at 3am to make wasn't "made with love"
and it just made me wonder how your eddies would handle it?
omg i saw that! i saw another too that was similar and the comments were so fucking funny.
truthfully, i think the worst would be with cowboy!eddie. not because he's bad, it just hits her the worst. especially with coop. they also live far out, so he can't run through a taco bell or a 24/7 walmart as easily.
i think it would be a mix of being uncomfortable, having the worst cravings, emotional, and also not wanting to wake eddie up because she knows he's been working and she should just get up and get it, but he makes them so much better and she's starving.
wakes him up already sniffly and he's so concerned. "what? what's wrong? what- is it the baby? the baby? are you alright?" he's up in a matter of seconds, wide awake, flinging the light on.
"no." you sniffle, rubbing a hand down your stomach. "i mean, yeah, the baby's fine, but we're hungry."
eddie's head hurts from how fast his heart was beating, still trying to wake up and wrap his head around everything. "ok? go get somethin'."
and then the tears start. "hey, hey, ok. what d'you want? i'll go get it for you-"
"-no. i feel bad." you sob. "i want a quesadilla, but you're sleeping, but i want one so bad-"
"-i'll go make one. just-" eddie holds his hands out. "relax, baby. don't stress yourself." he's still getting used to the hormones, the absolute swings in mood.
he makes it, brings it to you with a glass of water. eddie thinks everythings fine, still half asleep, laying back down. he hears a huff of irritation, eyes opening. "what?"
"this doesn't taste like how you normally make it." you frown.
eddie swallows his own grunting huff of irritation. "well, it is, baby. same way."
your lip wobbles but nose scrunches in anger. "i told you i felt bad that you had to make it! it's just what the baby- your baby was craving!"
eddie's blinking bc what the actual fuck??? "i know, that's why i made it-"
"-yeah but you- you made it and you're mad and i can taste it!" you wail, pressing your palms into your eyes. "you didn't make it with love! now the baby is eating something not made with love!"
eddie's not really sure what the fuck is going on. so he just hugs you instead, tries to soothe you because he feels like he might be having an out of body experience lol.
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arctickat2400 · 2 months ago
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Left Behind ∞ Damon Salvatore
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Damon Salvatore x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 1,252
Request: Idk if you’re accepting requests but I really love the things you write so here I am! Could you please write some Damon Salvatore x female reader? Something with a lot of angst and comfort, I was thinking of something around the time when Damon finds out that his mother is alive and she just chose to leave him behind when he was a little kid, just searching for some comfort in the reader please? 
Notes/Warnings: Quote from show (not my quote - credit to show), violent outbursts (no one gets hurt physically), comfort, Damon is 178 like in the show, I wrote it from the top of my head without many notes so proceed with caution (lol)
* * * *
The sound of glass shattering against the wall prompted you to drop your book and rush downstairs to see Damon pacing around the living room, his hands pulling at his hair in frustration. 
“Damon, what happened? What’s going on?” You shuddered at the sight of your distressed boyfriend. Damon turned to you, looking back on the conversation he never wanted to remember ever again. 
“You look exactly the same as you did 172 years ago.” Was the first thing Damon said the moment he laid on his very much alive mother. All this time he thought she was dead. Turns out, she’s been alive and never came to find him.
“I have a really good skin-care routine,” Lillian deadpanned. 
“After all this time, why’d you never come back for us sooner?” Damon wondered, fearing the answer. Why else would she have stayed away for so long?
“Because, Damon, I never wanted you in the first place. I chose to leave because I had more important matters to attend to,” Lillian admitted as if it was the most normal thing to say to a person. Damon felt like a dagger had pierced right through his heart. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The person who he thought left because they had no choice had actually left because they wanted to. The person who he thought loved him the most never really loved him at all. 
“She walked out on me. That’s all there is to it,” Damon confessed like it was nothing before he turned without another word and walked out the door. 
Your heart broke for the love of your life. You knew what he was talking about. Just a few hours ago, Damon had left after finding out his mother was alive. He’d told you where he was going and was gone within seconds. You hadn’t known when to expect him back, but you knew something was seriously wrong the moment you heard the glass shatter. 
You sighed, deciding to give him some space. You took a broom from the hall closet to clean up the glass and a towel to wash up the splattered bourbon. Throwing the towel in the wash and the glass in the trash, you strolled outside to find your boyfriend. 
“What’re you doing?” You found Damon sitting on the front steps of the Salvatore House. You leaned against the doorframe behind him, crossing your arms over your chest, waiting. All you wanted to do was be there for him, listen, and make sure he knows he’s not alone in his sorrows. 
“Looking at the stars, listening to the Universe laugh at me.” Damon expressed nonchalantly. He couldn’t believe that after all these years, his entire life, he believed that his mother was dead, that she left not of her own will. He guessed he didn’t know his mother as well as he thought. All the stories he was told, lies. It wasn’t that she had to go. He was just unwanted, left behind. 
You move from inside to walk down the stairs and sit on the grass in front of Damon. You sat with a bit of room in between you both, knowing about Damon’s random outbursts. You sit with your legs stretched out in front of you, one crossed over the other with your hands intertwined in your lap as you gaze up at him. Your expressed was filled with many emotions: adoration that never ceases for your darling boyfriend, worry for what was going through his head and what he was going through, concern for what he might do in response to this horrible, heartbreaking news he just discovered, and patience in waiting to take care of him in any way possible. 
“How could I be so stupid?” Damon howled, raising his voice suddenly, standing in exasperation. You jumped slightly, but not enough for him to notice. “I mean, I really thought-” He paused, cutting himself off with a defeated chuckle. It was no use, he figured. Why grieve over someone who never grieved him? He’s spent his entire life doing so. Now that he knows the truth, there was no point in continuing. 
Damon bowed his head in defeat, sighing, and you gazed up at him with an expression of sweet sympathy. He stood there on the stair step, one hand placed on his hip and the other on the back of his neck as he contemplated. 
He looked up at you, then. You waited for his reaction, watched for his next move. What you didn’t expect, though, was when Damon descended the last few stairs and stopped in front of you. He gestured for you to spread your legs before he turned and placed himself between them. He reclined back to lay his head on your lap and you leaned back on one hand while guiding your fingers to brush through his hair comfortingly. 
“I’m sorry,” Damon apologized to you, gazing up into your eyes. Although, he had nothing to apologize for. “I didn’t know what to think when I heard she was alive. And when she told me she-” But you couldn’t let him go on. You could see the gears spinning in his head, the struggles and the negative thoughts. You knew what he was thinking. They were thoughts that were certainly not new to your empathetic ears, and they were thoughts that you always tried your hardest to apprehend, to keep them from his mind, to make sure he knew they weren’t true.
“Shh,” You placed your finger over his lips gently, locking eyes with a sweet smile. You brush your hand over his cheek, stroking your thumb over his forehead soothingly. “It’s okay, baby. I hate that you had to go through that. She had no right to do what she did. She was never meant to be a mother if she felt it was okay to leave behind such a precious little boy. But I need you to know that even when you feel alone, I will always be here. I will never leave you behind because I love you and I always will,” You smiled down at him. 
Damon didn’t think he could love you more than he did at this moment. He wanted to engrain this moment in his mind. He wanted to memorize everything about you because it was you that made this moment so special. You were so human, so mundane, the way you touched him so gently, the way you didn’t care about a single thing because all you wanted to do was make sure he was okay. He knew that with you, he would be. 
Damon flipped himself over and lifted himself up onto his hands and knees as he gently guided you to lay down beneath him. He moved up to hover over you, placing his hand on your cheek with the most love filled gaze in his eyes. He bent down and pressed a passionate kiss to your lips until you could feel all the love and appreciation he felt for you. 
“You are the best thing to ever happen to me. I hope you know that,” Damon chuckled sweetly, his forehead leaning against yours. Who knew he could be so soft?
Damon slid back down to lay between your legs again. He placed a kiss on your tummy before laying his head there, wrapping his arms around your waist. You tangled your fingers in his hair while Damon revels in the comfort he finds in your embrace. 
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am-i-the-asshole-official · 7 months ago
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AITA for throwing away a birthday gift my friend got me because of who they are hanging out with?
I (now 19f) had a birthday a few weeks back. My friend Jane (20f) had gotten me a gift but hadn't been able to give it to me yet. Jane posted on her story that she was eating dinner with Alice (I think 25f?).
For this to make sense and so I dont get a ton of INFO comments, let me go into detail about Alice.
Alice used to be someone I went to for advice. She helped me with school, she gave me advice on crushes, was just overall like a big sister to me. When I was 10 I know my mother trusted her enough to have her babysit me (the thing with Alice is she has always been so mature, literally everyone has always thought she was older then she was which is why I dont know for sure if she is 25). I thought she would always be a good sister-like figure in my life.
However, I got in a relationship with Mark and it was like all hell broke loose. Mark says she is jealous because they used to have a thing (everyone thought they were together but they claimed they never were, Mark says she liked him but he turned her down but had fun flirting at the time). Alice told me she was concerned because of the age difference, which made no sense to me because she talked to someone who was 10 years older then her when she was 21/22. Alice also made negative comments about Mark that were extremely rude.
It really felt like Alice was trying to break me and Mark up! Mark is older than Alice and said that she always has done this when he dates anyone and thats why he hasn't dated much (the last girl he dated was Alice's friend and they stopped being friend's after they had broken up, I remember this because Alice was upset her friend made her choose between them or Mark when Alice had been friends with Mark since she was a very young kid).
We didn't invite Alice to the wedding because she didn't like our relationship (why would I want you there to celebrate if you don't even care for us?). We also didn't invite her because Alice and Mark stopped being friends for a year or two before we got together and it would have been awkward for Mark. I told Jane that I didn't want to hang out with Alice and encouraged Jane not to as well.
And I thought Jane hadn't, but now I see she still is. Jane said that Alice isn't a bad person and just because I'm not friends with her doesn't mean she plans on stopping. Jane told me that Alice still cares for me and if I wanted to talk to her I could, but I don't want to. Jane went on and we started arguing, and I dont remember what all was said by us, but then she cursed me out. In response, I threw the still wrapped gift in the trash.
Jane isnt talking to me anymore. Mark says its probably a good thing since she wasn't a good friend. At the time I felt justified but there's a pit in my stomach and I wonder if I went a bit too far? AITA?
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