#you remember kyle saying something along the lines of if you see him then it's already too late

[shotmrmiller]

thinking it was a good idea making now retired simon wear his old mask for role play but now you're kinda afraid because you can feel his eyes on you but he's nowhere in sight and being hunted in your own home is actually terrifying

[beloveds-embrace]

(dark poly 141 x single pregnant reader, very rushed)

You don’t know when they first appeared in your life. Maybe it was the day at the grocery store when your feet ached, your belly heavy with the weight of your unborn child, and a stranger- a man too broad, too still, lingering in the same aisle as you- offered to load your bags into the car. Maybe it was when you were late getting home from work, the weight of exhaustion pulling at your limbs, and a burly man with sharp, blue eyes and a thick Scottish brogue insisted on walking you to your door, just to “make sure ye got in safe, bonnie.”

Or maybe it was before that, when your landlord suddenly decided not to raise the rent, when the lights in your apartment stopped flickering despite you never calling maintenance.

You don’t know when it started.

But by the time you notice them, it’s too late.

They come in pieces, never all at once. Maybe that’s why your focus never quite catches them when it should’ve.

Johnny is the easiest to trust. He’s warm, friendly, a constant presence that doesn’t seem out of place- until you look back and realize you don’t remember ever properly speaking to him for the first time. He’s always just there, standing behind you in line at the pharmacy, offering to carry your bags when you struggle. He calls you “bonnie” and clicks his tongue when he sees the exhaustion on your face.

“You’re pushin’ yourself too hard, lass.” His voice is teasing, but there’s something firm beneath it, much like his hands on your shoulders. “Should be restin’.”

Then there’s Kyle. He’s the one who keeps showing up at the diner you work at, at first just another regular, but then a fixture in your days. He leaves tips that are too big and stays long after he’s finished his food, asking you questions- small, harmless things.

“How far along are you?”

“Got any family around?”

“You shouldn’t be on your feet all day. You got someone looking after you, love?”

There’s concern in his voice. It feels nice, being cared for, so you don’t let yourself worry about why he asks so many questions.

But you don’t notice the way his eyes track you when you move. The way he listens too closely, storing away every detail you give him.

Simon is a shadow. A presence you feel but never see too clearly. When your apartment door’s lock sticks one night, it’s mysteriously fixed by morning. When your feet swell too much for your shoes, a new, comfortable pair appears in a package at your door- no return address. When you wake up in the middle of the night, you think you hear movement outside your window, but when you check, there’s nothing there.

He introduces himself to you once, silently joining your side when a group of young men had attempted to follow you. You’d been to grateful to consider that he had been following you, as well. And thus, that had been your first meeting as far as you were aware.

And then there’s John. He comes last, when you’re already too exhausted to question why they’re all suddenly in your life.

“You shouldn’t be working like this,” he tells you one night when he shows up at the diner, sitting in your section like he belongs there. He watches you, steady and unshakable, like he’s waiting for you to break. “Not in your condition.”

“My condition?” you scoff, but you’re too tired to be indignant.

“You’re pregnant,” he says simply. “You need to rest.”

You want to rest.

But there’s rent to pay. Bills. A baby coming soon, and no one else to help.

Except, suddenly, there is someone. Maybe more than one person, even if you don’t notice the changes at first because they start so small.

Johnny shows up when you’re struggling with your bags, even when you don’t remember telling him where you’d be. Kyle appears at your work just when you need an extra hand. John tells you he has “connections” when your hours get cut and suddenly, your landlord is more lenient about late payments.

When your doctor’s office calls to confirm your next prenatal appointment, the receptionist mentions your “husband” already checked in about your test results.

You don’t have a husband.

But when you try to ask for details, the woman on the phone just laughs. “Oh, don’t worry- he said everything’s fine. Had a lovely Mancunian accent! You’ve got yourself quite a lovely man, mrs.”

You never get a name, and you don’t know what to do about your suspicions.

And you don’t notice the cameras.

Not when Johnny pulls you into a hug, his hands lingering a little too long on your back. Not when Kyle helps you rearrange your furniture, brushing his fingers against the edges of your walls. Not when John “fixes” your heater, or when Simon sits silently in the corner after he’s given you a teddy bear for your little bean, its eyes beady and gleaming.

But they’re there. Tiny, black dots tucked into the corners of your home. A microphone nestled near the nightstand. A wire running under the couch.

They see you.

They always see you.

You wake up one night to the sound of your apartment door unlocking.

Fear grips you instantly, but before you can move, a voice rumbles in the darkness.

“Shh. It’s just me.”

John. How-?

Your heart is pounding, but he sounds calm. Steady. You hear the door click shut, hear his boots move across your floor, even when you wheeze in fear and press your back against the headboard of your bed.

“You forgot to lock up again.” He says, a quiet reprimand. He was always telling you to do that, but-

“I- I don’t think I did-“

“You did,” he assures you. “Anyone could’ve walked in.”

Like him.

There’s a shift in the air, something heavy settling between you. You swallow hard, pressing a hand to your belly, eyes teary from fright even if he is calm.

John exhales softly, and his face softens. Then, a warm hand rests over yours, heavy and possessive.

“You don’t have to do this alone,” he murmurs. “Let us take care of you.”

The words settle into you like a brand, curling around your ribs.

You should say no. Demand what the fuck is going on, why is he here, why them-

But you’re too tired. Too scared.

And his hand is so steady.

[slutz4marsh]

Kyle Broflovski x Bratty F!Reader SMUT for April!!! <3

Look. Kyle considered himself to be a generally patient person.

Although, he did know that depending on who he asked, some people might say that was complete and utter bullshit.

Whatever. The point was that he had patience. If not in general, at least for you.

Which was why it frustrated him when you acted like a brat.

He was patient with you, and generally, he didn’t like to be super rough with you. He didn’t like to ruin you. Not on purpose, anyway. Kyle liked to worship you, treat you like a precious little doll that needed his protection.

And yet you still acted like this even when he treated you like a precious, sweet angel. His angel, his doll, his princess.

Kyle had thoughts when you walked out of your house in a shirt that showed off the curve of your breasts and a skirt that didn’t leave that much to the imagination, but he didn’t say anything. Figured, hey. Maybe you weren’t doing it on purpose.

But when you went out and he caught you leaning forward toward your friends, giggling and twirling your hair and pushing your arms together to force your breasts together?

Yeah. He knew what the fuck you were doing.

So, he stood up and grabbed your arm to yank you along with him. He told his friends that he just remembered that you two had something you had to do, something about a project or something. It was a good enough excuse, considering they all bought it.

Kyle was dead silent until he got you in the car, and then he shook his head while he started the car. He pressed his foot on the gas pedal, eyes narrowed at the road.

“I really cannot fucking believe you sometimes,” Kyle snapped, his knuckles white from how tight he was holding the steering wheel.  “I mean, I saw the outfit and thought it was weird, but whatever.”

He shook his head. “But whatever the hell that was?” Kyle scoffed. “You are such a brat sometimes.”

You knew Kyle was mad and nothing you could say would make it any better, so you chose to stay quiet and let Kyle vent out his irritations anyway.

When you got home, he dragged you into your bedroom and sat down on his bed. Then, he bent you over his lap without another word.

“Count.”

His words left no room for argument, so you took a breath. Kyle’s hand came down hard on your ass. You gasped and writhed, but Kyle kept you firmly in place.

“One,” you said, voice shaking some.

“Good girl. Keep going.” Kyle said as he rubbed your ass before hitting again.

He got to fifteen. You were sobbing and trembling as you whimpered out the number.

“Shh, shh,” Kyle cooed as he soothingly rubbed your ass. “See? Good girl. You know why I had to do that, don’t you?”

His words were softly spoken and sweet. A direct contrast to the previous actions he’d made.

You sniffled and nodded. You did know. It’s why you’d been such a brat all day anyway - you wanted his attention. No matter what that meant.

“I don’t really know that you’ve really learned anything though,” Kyle clicked his tongue. “For all I know, you’ll just do this again the minute I stop touching you.”

His hand snaked down the curve of your ass and between your delicate folds, fingers probing at your cunt. He dipped two fingers inside you and began to gently rub them against your spot. His fingers were long, nimble, and they felt fucking fantastic.

Fantastic to the point that you whimpered when he pulled his fingers out of you, coated in your juices. You moaned as you watched him suck his fingers clean.

And then, he pulled you off his lap and onto the bed. He pulled his own pants down and lined himself up with your entrance.

“Stay fuckin’ still, alright?” Kyle cursed as he pushed into you. Even through your lusty haze, you could tell he was still irritated with you for your brattiness.

You let out a broken moan as he pushed into you slowly, then began rocking his hips into you.

“God, you’re so tight,” Kyle groaned, “you’d be so perfect if you weren’t such a little brat.”

You whined softly as Kyle used your body, wrapping your legs around his waist.

“God, See?” Kyle panted. “You can be such a good girl, yeah? All tight and wet. Just for me, huh, princess?”

You moaned at his words and nodded swiftly. “Jus’ for you,” You managed to say between moans, feeling your walls starting to flutter.

Kyle shook his head and nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck. “Don’t,” he whispered his warning. “Not ‘til I say you can. I don’t think you’ve earned it yet.”

You whine desperately, but you nodded. And Kyle grinned, knowing he’d forced you back into submission. Back into his sweet, darling little angel that would listen to every word that fell from his lips.

You were so tense with the effort of trying to hold back your orgasm, you genuinely thought you might explode into teeny tiny little pieces.

And Kyle’s movements became more desperate and erratic.

If you were able to think about anything other than keeping your pleasure at bay, you would have known that Kyle was close. You would have known that he was moments away from painting your inner walls a milky white.

Kyle pushed his lips against your ear, his breath warm against your skin. They graze your skin, sending shivers up and down your spine, and you swore he was trying to kill you with the way he nipped at you.

“Sweetheart,” Kyle breathed. You could feel him grinning against your ear, and you felt like you were going insane with need and desperation. “I think you’ve earned it. Don’t you? You’re being so good and sweet for me.” 

You gasped, but you still held off. Waiting for Kyle to actually say the words.

And say them, he did. 

“Cum for me,” He nipped at your earlobe. “Come on, princess. Cum for me. You’ve earned it. Come on, baby.”

You swore to whatever god might fucking be out there, you blacked out.

Your orgasm was intense. You dragged your nails down Kyle’s back, sure to leave bright red marks for at least a few days. You practically screamed, chanting his name like it was a prayer to the only thing that mattered in that moment: him.

As your hole fluttered and clenched around him, it milked Kyle’s orgasm out of him. He came inside you with a deep groan, and he wrapped his arms around your torso, yanking you closer as he pulsed, filling you up with hot and sticky cum.

You both laid like that for a few minutes, catching your breath and coming back to yourselves.

Kyle pulled out of you with a groan and smiled as he cradled your cheeks in his hands.

“You are fucking perfect. C’mon, shower.”

With that, he gently grabbed your arms to help you to the bathroom.

[sentientcave]

One Shots

Two Graves - Phillip Graves is haunted by the memory of his older brother

Fuck-ass Mohawk - Johnny likes it when you're mean to him (And Ghost does too)

Pompeii//Good Grief - Dealing with loss during a mission gone wrong- Or maybe gone right.

Please, Mommy - A little gender fuckery with everyone's favourite Captain. (FtM Reader, read contents for kink warnings)

Hold the Line - FtM John and his ex-wife, Kate, talk about Kate's new girlfriend over the phone.

Swallow My Pride - Simon spots you across the bar. You're a long way from the little girl that used to torment him in primary, but that's alright. These days he's got a soft spot for beautiful men. Ftm Reader.

And They Were Roommates

Fem!Soap x Fem Reader - You're looking for a roommate, and Jaime Mactavish figures she's the right woman for the job.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

Heavy Weighs the Crown

Fantasy AU - A princess in self-imposed exile is forced to come home to face the man who took her father's crown and the life she left behind. 141 x Reader.

Chapter Index

Retirement Party

Price has retired from Military life, and he's not handling the change well. But on the one year anniversary of him hanging it up, his boys bring him something special to help keep him busy. You. (Dark fic! Read the content warnings)

Chapter Index

Honey It's Alright

Slasher AU with some of my OCs. Dark fic!! Read the warnings

Part 1 - Part 2

Sadie Blackmoore-Price in

Nobody Does it Better - Sadie and John reconnect for a night

You Only Live Twice (In Progress)

Hit Me With Your Best Shot

When Rory "Scout" Price moves in with her dad after a rough break-up, she's looking forward to reconnecting while she gets her feet back under her. But unfortunately, a post-divorce Kyle Garrick is moving in too, and he seems determined to be a pain in the ass. But then again, he is kind of hot.

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3

Please Say Yes

Starting fresh after a divorce, Chelsea really only has one thing on her mind: Starting a family. But going through the process of dating and marrying another man that could very well be lying about wanting kids, just like the last one, she's determined to make her family all by herself. She only really needs a man for one part of the process, and she has a particular man in mind, her neighbour, one John Price.

Chapter Index

Let's Riot!

When the Reader St arena gets bought out from under them by Morgan’s vengeful ex, Pippa Graves, The Reader St Riots suddenly find themselves without a practice space. Pippa may say she’ll play nice, but Morgan knows that she’ll either have to get back under Pippa’s manicured thumb or the whole team will be out on their ass in no time. Problem is, the only other practice space around that’s not booked up to the tits belongs to Jo Price, captain of the Femme41, and well… Morgan has a bit of ugly history with her too.

Still, Jo’s at least a little more reasonable than Pippa, and Morgan may hate to beg, but she’d hate to see the Riots disbanded more. And well, maybe there’s room for a little cooperation, especially when their teams get along so well.

Part 1 - Part 2

Mace of Bakes

"Are you happy, Mason?"

A question Mace hadn't asked himself in longer than he could remember. And when he finds he doesn't like the answer, he sets out to build a new life, a long way away from all the blood and dying on the battlefield. Happiness is not a warm gun. But it might be a warm loaf of bread.

Chapter 1

Paper Ballerina

Beware strangers bearing expensive gifts. A guilded cage is still a cage.

Chapter Index

Sparrow

Chapter Index

Cherry Bomb - Nikolai meets one of his Aunt's old school friends and tries not to fall in love.

You Drive Me Wild - Nikolai and Helena meet again three years later

WIP WEDNESDAY

Snippets and previews of things in the works

Rugby - Rugby Again - More Rugby - The Righteous Hand - Impound - More Impound - Sparrow - TNT - Lucky Bunny - Daddy's Girl - Sparrow Again + Retirement Party

[evervigilantnightshade]

The Line Part 10

Reader and John have always straddled the line between playful flirting and taking things further. However when they are forced into a safe house and a secret comes out will they be able to save what they were heading for or is all lost.

Reader x John Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Laswell, Original characters.

MDNI

Warnings: Angst, violence towards reader, reader attacked by men, a pup gets hurt (but don't worry he's ok) Blood, fluff, flirting, Death and killing on missions, Father of reader's death mentioned. Eventual smut.

MASTERLIST

They made their way towards the hallway and John grabbed his bag, having brought it upstairs not knowing where he was staying. Y/N led him downstairs again and went towards the door opposite of the cold storage room. She had left her bag outside the door so she grabbed it before she opened it. 

She walked in and turned on the lights revealing a large room with a queen size bed on the right side and a large sunk in wall length bookcase on the left. In the middle of the book case was a TV and the shelves were filled with books, nick nacks and framed photos. There was a comfy chair and ottoman positioned facing the TV and to the right of that a small shelf with a record player and some records. Directly across from the door was a small hallway with a bathroom on the left and a walk in closet on the right. 

She put her bag on the bench on the end of the bed and then awkwardly looked at John as he did the same. 

“So this is my room.” 

“I see that.” John said as he looked around. 

He walked over to the bookcase and was looking at some of the photos. There were ones of her in her early military years, ones of her family, one of her and Si in full uniform, then one of her and an older man. 

“Is this your da?” 

“Yeah, that was taken a few years ago.” 

He nodded and then noticed a picture of task force 141 and laughed 

“I remember this. You were pissed because Johnny and Kyle kept making rude faces.” 

“Yeah, well, I don't know why I thought they would take a normal picture in the first place. Guess I just wanted something with all of us in it. In case…” 

“In case one of us leaves the team?” John asked but knew what she meant originally. 

“In case one of us is asked to leave the team you mean.” 

“Love I didn’t mean it. I swear. I was angry and drunk. I should’ve listened to you when you told me it wasn’t the right time.” 

“You’ve been saying that a lot lately and yet you keep ignoring what I try to tell you. ” 

“I know but I promise love, I’m listening now.” 

“The thing is I’ve run out of things to say.” 

He walked over to her and took her hands in his. 

“There has to be more to say, I have so much more to say.” 

She sighed and then took her hands from his and motioned for him to sit down in the chair. Instead he moved the ottoman and gave her the chair. He sat for a moment looking at her and then spoke. 

“I’m going to start again by apologising. Honestly I’ll keep apologising to you for the rest of my life for the things I said to you, for the things I made you believe. I regret it all the moment I woke up the next morning. I know you’re not any of the things I said you were. You’re the complete opposite of that. 

You told me that I was wrong but I wouldn’t listen and I have been so completely heartbroken since. I was hurt and embarrassed, I started thinking everything I had thought was happening between us was all in my head. But you told me you wanted me and I couldn’t understand why you would do that to me. Allowing me to fall for you only to rip it all away. I couldn’t think straight and was broken. I never thought I would have love, what we do really gets in the way of that. But then you came along and the first moment I saw you, you took my breath away. 

You were so incredibly beautiful and so talented. So focused when it was needed but also brought joy to the team after missions. At first I thought it was just an attraction and I didn’t act on it because I was your superior. But damn you made that hard. You’re effortlessly sexy and I found myself wanting you in the most unrealistic scenarios. Watching you work on missions, watching you train, watching you make dinner. I couldn’t concentrate and was losing focus. You consumed my thoughts. 

Then one day you flirted with me. It was small, you made a reference to how well the new fatigues fit me and I couldn’t stop the smile that spread across my face. From there it slowly progressed as you know. And then the stake out happened and I realized it was so much more than just attraction. The thought of losing you, it killed me. I wanted that life with you that I thought was always unattainable. The life where we have comfortable Sunday mornings reading on the couch, or Friday night movie nights, cuddled up together under the same blanket. Or  days where we lay in each other's arms and spend the day in bed talking. I wanted it all. I still want it.” 

He reached over and took her hands again and she let him hold them. 

“I know I fucked up, I know I tainted this. I just hope that you’ll give me another chance. I promise I will never do anything like this again.” 

Y/N looked him over, his face was so sincere she almost lost all her resolve and pulled him into her arms to comfort him. She shook the thought out of her head. 

“Do you know there is a weather phenomenon here called a Chinook? It’s quite beautiful to see, the clouds form an arch over the horizon and warm wind blows down the mountains. It’s unpredictable and you never know when it’s going to happen. However every single time there is a Chinook it causes me to have an intense migraine. I always wonder how something so beautiful causes me so much pain.

I don’t want to just accept that at any moment you could hurt me like you did in Germany. I don’t want to live in fear that the moment something happens your automatic response is to kick me out of your life. To know that when it really comes down to it, you don’t actually trust me.” 

John tried to interject but Y/N stopped him. 

“And I’m not saying I’m not to blame in all this. I kept things from you, I wasn’t honest and I’ve lied to you multiple times to keep up the original lie. Not big lies, small ones. Like telling you Charlie was our family dog. To be honest this whole thing has made me stop and think about us. In the end we don’t really know anything about each other besides the basics that we see on a day to day basis or whatever's in our files. 

For example I know you take your tea with a splash of milk and no sugar but I don’t know how many siblings you have. I know the type of cigars you smoke but I don’t know your moms name. And there’s so much you don’t know about me, hell you just learned today that I’m a twin. Maybe this was all going a little too fast to begin with.”

 “So what are you saying?” 

“Honestly I don’t know yet. On the one hand something in me is telling me to end this and run as far away from it as possible. Leave the team, leave you, leave all of it. On the other hand though I want to stay and fight for this, for you. I’ve never felt like this before about anyone and I want to see if we can salvage it.” 

“We can. I promise we can.” 

“Well it’s something we both have to think about. For now I need to take a nap. My head is killing me, I’m exhausted and I haven’t had a moment alone in far too long. Just give me a few hours in the room. 

We’ll have a big dinner, Em should be here by then and after we need to sit down with my family and give them some sort of explanation as to why their lives have been disrupted. After that everyone will go to bed and I’ll sleep on the couch upstairs because I don’t trust myself to share a bed with you and control myself not to allow what we’ve both wanted for so long to happen. It will only confuse things at this point though.” 

“Y/N that’s ridiculous. Let me sleep on the couch or even change rooms with Soap or Gaz.” 

“Neither of those things are going to happen. I know this house and I’ve been sneaking around it since I was little. I know where to step where the floor doesn’t creak and I know how not to get caught. As for changing rooms, I won’t let that happen.” 

“Why not?” 

“Because I told my family about you. I  told them I was falling for you and how excited I was. I don’t want to turn to them now and tell them what happened or even that things are different now. I don’t want them to hate you for the things you said. So no, we won't change rooms, and I’ll sleep on the couch for now.” 

John just nodded and stood up to leave the room. He looked devastated and it tugged at Y/N’s heart. The urge to hold him came back and she didn’t want to fight it this time. 

“Hey,” She called out to him and stood up walking over to where he was standing. “Do you think maybe… for just a moment… we can pretend nothing bad happened, that we are still in that place where I can hug you?” 

John swallowed and then nodded, not trusting himself to speak, wanting this more than anything. Y/N closed the gap between them and wrapped her arms around him, placing her head against his chest. His left arm wrapped around her back while his right hand reached up and his fingers intertwined in her hair. He pressed a soft kiss on the top of her head and then rested his cheek against it. 

They held each other tightly, holding back the words they both desperately wanted to say to each other in this moment of vulnerability. John felt tears forming in his eyes for the first time in over a decade and tried hard to fight them back. Y/N however was letting hers flow freely and he could feel them soaking into his shirt. 

“I don’t want to lose you.” He whispered causing a sob to escape her throat. 

“I don’t want to lose you either.” She whispered back. 

In that moment he wanted so badly to kiss her, to tell her over and over again how much he loved her and how sorry he was. He knew though that he had to give her the space she asked for, to let her think. He had to let go but it was so incredibly difficult. He gave her one last kiss on the top of her head and released her from his arms. She looked up at him with her teary eyes and he couldn’t help the tear that rolled down his cheek. She reached up and wiped it away, then cupped his face in her hand. He closed his eyes for just a moment, then took her hand in his kissed it and walked out of the room. 

Y/N laid down on her bed and cried herself to sleep. When she woke several hours later she felt clearer than she had before. Instead of getting out of bed she laid there thinking things over. Maybe they could start over, build the trust again, this time really getting to know each other. Hell maybe they could even go on a date like normal people do. Something they hadn’t done yet. In fact the little time they got to spend together alone was happenstance. Like if the rec room happened to be empty or when they were on the stake out. They would talk for hours about books they were reading or past missions. 

She knew deep down she wanted John, she wanted to be with him. She had been fighting it to protect her heart but maybe this was better. They rushed things before, got caught up with the physical side of things and they didn’t take time for the rest. 

“But what if he hurts me again?” She thought to herself.  

She got up and took a shower, before dressing and heading upstairs still feeling confused. She saw that some of the group was still in the living room but her mom, grandma and Emma were in the kitchen so that’s where she headed. 

She walked up behind Emma and hugged her from behind. Emma was the only one in the family that was shorter than Y/N by quite a bit. She, like her sisters, had long brown hair with blue eyes.  

“Hey sis.” She whispered and Emma smiled while turning around

They hugged and rocked back and forth. 

“I was wondering when you were going to make your way up here.” 

“Needed a nap and a shower.” 

“I met your guys, they’re all so nice. Kyle is quite handsome.”  

“Good luck getting anywhere near him, Si is watching the guys like a hawk.” Y/N laughed “He’s already split up Charlie and Johnny.”  

“Well we’ll see about that.” She winked at Y/N. “Also met John…” 

“Let me guess. He’s so handsome, he’s so manly, wow he’s amazing?” 

“Well he’s all of that, yes. But I was going to say he looks sad. Did something happen?” 

Emma the ever perceptive sister. Y/N sighed and then hugged her sister again. 

“Everything's fine.” She lied while Emma couldn’t see her face. “What’s for dinner?” 

Changing the subject seemed to work because Momma Lynn instantly put Y/N to work helping set the dining room table that was now set up on the side of the living room. 

She grabbed the plates and cutlery from the cupboards and then headed into the living room. Putting the items down on the table and she called Meadow over. 

“Here sweets, help me set the table.” 

Meadow came over and grabbed the cutlery off the top of the plates. They worked their way around the table and when they were done Y/N put her arm around her and they headed back to the kitchen. 

“You didn’t come say hi yet, what’s going on?” Y/N asked and then bumped her hip lightly into Meadow. 

“Boy problems.” She sighed 

“Oh babe, I know the feeling. Are you ok, want to talk about it?” 

“Not when everyone’s around. Maybe we can go for a walk later?” 

“Absolutely!” Y/N said quietly and then gave her niece a hug.

She had missed all of this. Spending time with her family, seeing the kids, they were all growing up so fast. She didn’t want to miss as much as she had, but it came with the job. She felt bad for Simon. Sure they were able to make it home for Clara’s birth but there would be milestones in his daughter's life that he was going to miss. It was inevitable. 

Her mind shifted to John. She wondered if he wanted kids. He hadn’t ever mentioned it, but again they haven’t spent a lot of time thinking about those things. 

They finished setting the table and when all the food was on the table Y/N went to let everyone know and they made their way to the table, she couldn’t see John though. 

“Hey Kyle, where’s John?” 

Kyle motioned to the back deck. 

She made her way out there and saw John sitting under the gazebo in one of the chairs smoking a cigar, a look of deep concentration on his face. 

She leaned against one of the gazebo posts, putting her hands in her pockets. He still hadn’t noticed her there. 

“John.” She said softly. 

He looked up at her and then smiled, but it seemed a bit forced. 

“Sorry love, didn’t hear you come out.” 

“It’s ok, dinners ready.” She motioned towards the door with her head. 

He stood up and put his cigar out, making his way over to her. She turned to go inside when she felt his hand softly grab her waist. He pulled her towards him, her back still to him. He slipped one arm across her chest resting his hand on her shoulder, the other snaked around her waist as he buried his face in her neck, the smell of his cigar filling her nose. 

Ever since they hugged in her room she ached to be held by him again. They had never been in each other's arms like that and it was so much more intimate than anything they had ever done before. Until now. Now with breath fanning over her skin she felt herself placing her hands over his and squeezing them so he was holding her tighter. She felt safe in his arms, loved. 

The way he was holding her felt emotional, like he was desperately trying to tell her something without using words. Was this goodbye she wondered, having seen how serious his face was moments ago.

She had told him to think about things seriously, hadn’t she? To decide if they could salvage this. What if he decided they couldn’t. The thought caused a sharp pain to form in her chest. She inhaled sharply and squeezed his arms around her even tighter. If this was going to be the last time he held her she wanted him to hold her so tightly it left a mark on her. Tears once again filled her eyes. 

Sensing that something was wrong John lifted his head

“What’s wrong baby?” 

He’d never called her that before and felt her squeeze him tighter even though he didn’t think that was possible. He pulled her shoulder with his hand so she was facing him and he could see the tears in her eyes. 

“Sorry,” Her chin wobbled. “All I seem to do is cry lately.” 

“I understand. I’ve shed a few tears myself.” He admitted 

She looked up into his eyes and then wrapped her arms around his neck. It was his turn now to inhale sharply as she raised herself up on her tiptoes. 

“Kiss me.” She whispered and he hesitated. 

Hadn’t she said she didn’t want this mere hours ago? Said it would complicate things?

“Please” She begged and all thoughts left his mind

He pressed his lips to hers instantly. Softly, intimately. His hands moving down, placing them on the sides of her hips to ground himself. This wasn’t a kiss that he wanted to rush, and it wasn’t a kiss of passion, it was a kiss of shared love. 

He could taste the salt of her tears on her lips and he pulled his mouth from hers as he kissed the tears from her cheeks before moving back to her lips. In this moment everything fell away. The past was gone and it was just the two of them here, in this moment. A moment neither of them wanted to end, but knew it had too. 

For the second time today John knew he had to pull away from her. Her family was standing on the other side of the door, waiting for them to join them for dinner. He just couldn’t seem to make himself do it this time. Not when he had all he wanted here in his arms, his lips pressed to hers. 

They were so caught up in each other they didn’t hear the back door open until Simon coughed to get their attention. They slowly pulled away from each other and then looked over at him. 

“Sorry, it’s just…” He motioned inside, embarrassment causing his cheeks to turn red.

Y/N nodded and ran her hands over her face, then her hair, straightening herself up before going in. Simon went into the house without them, and John rubbed her back as she took a deep breath. 

“Are you ok?” His voice was soft and filled with concern. 

Y/N chuckled sadly and looked at him. 

“Are you?” 

“No.”

They looked into each other's eyes for a moment and then turned to head inside. 

[dozyarchive]

✦ I See Us in Black and White ✦

Hands Free

   Music thumped through the space, drinks in every hand and smiles on every face. The club was nice, high end but still casual enough to feel like you were in some sort of movie. Neon lights pulse alongside the low house lights, coloring the world in jewel tones.

   “I never thought I’d see Lilli somewhere like this,” Alex comments, leaning closer to George so he could hear. The younger nods, eyes landing on the aforementioned woman. She was standing near the bar, talking with a woman.

   She was dressed for the occasion, a pair of fitted black pants and dark blue corset top, and black platform boots, making her tower over most of the women in the club. Her hair was in loose curls, down and framing her face. The two had already seen a few people approach her, men and women alike. The women had immediately been welcomed by a smile, Lilli letting them fawn over her outfit or looks. One had even given her a drunk but well meaning kiss on the cheek, leaving a messy lipstick print. Her friends had pulled her away, apologizing, but Lilli had laughed them off

   The men, however, had been assessed with a critical eye, tight-lipped smiles and cool indifference. It had cowed most of them, and they got the hint, excusing themselves after a few moments. One or two had to be told to move along, but none had reacted too badly.

   “Here’s another one, let’s see how he does,” George remarks, pointing to a man who had sauntered up.

   “Logan, you good mate?” The two men look over to the blonde just as the man stops in front of Lilli. Logan has his eyes locked onto her, body loose, but jaw tensed. Lando is smiling, softly laughing at the quick look Logan gives him before looking back to where his mother was.

   “Aw, Logie Bear! So protective of his mother. She doesn’t need security when she’s got you around.” Alex joins in on the teasing immediately, poking Logan’s arm. Oscar snorts from his position next to the man, but his eyes are also looking towards the older woman.

   “I mean, when you’re as beautiful as Lilli is, attention is normal,” Charles joins in. Max mumbles something that sounds like an agreement. Logan finally looks away, side eyeing the men.

   “Hey, I’m just saying! Objectively, your mother is very attractive!” Charles defends himself. Logan rolls his eyes, and Oscar finally gives a full laugh, nudging his friend.

   “At least they’re respectful about it. Do you remember that engineer at Prema that opened with some line about her ass?”

   Lando and Max choke out a noise, Max on his drink and Lando on air. George looks at the youngest two with disbelief, while Alex’s jaw has actually dropped open.

   “Of course, I completely forgot him mentioning how good her bottom looked in the dress she had decided to wear and how he wondered if it would look just as good in something else, thank you for reminding me,” Logan answers, sarcasm and disgust dripping from his voice. “It’s not like I didn’t sock him in the face and break his nose immediately afterwards.”

   “To be fair, that was at least three years ago,” Oscar reminds him, but Logan just huffs out a breath.

   “No fucking chance,” Alex almost yells, kicking Logan under the table.

   “Oh trust me, there was a wonderful meeting after that. We’re just lucky that it stayed within the garage. The media would have had a field day,” Oscar answers in Logan’s place, smirking. “We’re even more lucky that Kyle, Lucas, or Lilli’s dad weren’t there. Lucas would have broken his legs, and I think Kyle would have snapped his arm or something. I don’t even want to imagine what Mr. T would have done.”

   “Shoot him,” Logan comments, voice dark. 

   “Forget personal security, she’s got attack dogs,” Max mumbles, staring at Logan with wary eyes.

   “She can handle herself, but she shouldn’t have to,” Logan remarks, downing the last of his drink.

   “I think she’s doing that right now,” George points out, nodding his head to where Lilli is standing, still in the same spot. Now, however, her posture is stiff, and she has a visible frown on her face. The man from earlier is still here, but he’s got her backed against the bar. Despite their position, Lilli is standing tall, not backing down.

   “Logan,” Oscar quickly grabs the blonde’s arm. Logan is tense, eyes lasered in. Alex also tenses a bit, ready to jump up.

   The man makes a move, hand reaching out and settling precariously low on her hips, practically grabbing Lilli’s ass. The rest of the table jumps to attention, while Oscar lets go of Logan, who jumps up instantly.

   “Don’t hurt him too bad, he needs to be able to receive charges, and he can’t do that if he’s in the hospital,” Oscar calls out. The group watches as Logan winds through the club with alarming speed for someone at least three drinks deep, reaching the man within seconds.

   “He’s going to murder him,” Oscar remarks, surprisingly calm. Lando and Charles stare at him for a second before focusing back on Logan.

   The blonde reaches up and grabs the man’s shoulder, pulling and spinning the guy partially around, despite Logan being a good three inches shorter than him. The guy is instantly in attack mode, getting in Logan's face and yelling.

   “Should we call a bouncer?” Lando asks, nervously eyes the height and build difference. The guy was buff, looked like he half lived in the gym. Not to say Logan didn’t have muscle, his arms were visibly strong, and obviously his neck, but it was a different kind of strength.

   “Nah, just watch,” Oscar waves him off, leaning back. 

   Logan had kept somewhat calm, not yelling or getting in his face. However, the second Lilli tries to move or leave, the man whips back around to grab her. This time, Logan doesn’t hesitate. He grabs the guy, sends a quick jab to the gut, making him bend over, and follows with a nasty uppercut.

   “Holy shit!” Alex jumps as the man falls down, out like a light.

   “Hope he broke his nose,” Oscar snarks, smiling wickedly.

   “Is he going to get in trouble?” Charles questions nervously, eyes scanning for security. Oscar shakes his head, still relaxed.

   “Logan’s friends with one of the guys here, and I think Lilli went to school with the owner.” Oscar finishes his drink, and the group relaxes a bit.

   “Look like the clean up crew is here,” Max remarks as a bar staff member and security guard approach. The staff member checks on Lilli, who just waves her off with a steady smile. The security guy talks to Logan first before speaking to Lilli. Then, the two grab the still unconscious guy and begin to remove him from the area.

   The bartender slides two drinks across the counter, says something, and gives Logan a high-five.

   “Five bucks says we get our tabs waived,” Oscar looks to Alex, offering the deal.

   “Raise it 10 that it’s only Logan’s and Lilli’s,” the older replies. Oscar nods and they shake hands.

   “You’re so calm, how?” Charles questions the youngest. Oscar just points to the mother-son duo, Logan now leading Lilli back over to the group.

   “Logan would never let anything happen to Lilli, and she can deal with people herself. You think that she would let herself become dependent on someone? She can throw a mean right hook, and probably kick someone’s ribs in. Mr. T and Lucas made sure she had access to whatever self defence classes she wanted.”

   None of them know how to respond to that, instead opting to greet Lilli and Logan as they finally arrive. Oscar scoots out of the bench, allowing Lilli to go in first, and then Logan. The Aussie sits last, buffering the end of the table.

   “Good show, boys?” Lilli cheerfully asks, sipping her drink. Lando lets out a stuttering laugh, Alex giving her an incredulous look.

   “Show is an understatement,” Max comments from next to her, but still giving her a bit of a side eye. Lilli laughs, turning and giving Logan a kiss on the cheek.

   “I was going to hit him where the sun don’t shine, but Logan got there first. Well, at least we got free drinks out of it. Mikey said all our drinks are on the house now, so order up gentlemen.”

   Alex groans while Oscar smirks. Logan gives both of them a questioning look, but doesn’t question it.

A/N. I See Us Logan is a feral little menace when he needs to be (when someone messes with his mom)

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy! Please check out my Masterlist for any of my other works!

1434 Words

[cementcornfield]

You should post your thoughts on Ja’Marr and Kyle!! I’m so interested in their dynamic if that makes sense 😅

lmao anon i love you thank you because i was literally just typing a post up by itself. but now i get the benefit of looking like i'm not the ONLY person to care about this. (there's at least two of us!!)

ok so! too much rambling about things that i could no way actually know anything about irl BUT 

kyle and ja’marr being together in paris is VERY interesting to me. their whole relationship is really because like. okay. i have joked that kyle and ja’marr are there to pick out joe’s wardrobe for next year together lmao but like!!! the clothes saga is SUCH a thing with ja’marr. the man has a Complex about joe and fashion and his part in it. we know this. i hardly need to go over the clothes saga with y’all again. but i will because it’s fun for me. ja’marr claims in GQ that he buys clothes for joe all the time and drops them off at 'the house’ for him. which is insane enough if that’s true. then a few days after that article drops (and also joe’s appendix explodes) he says nah never mind i was lying! (“kinda”). and that’s insane too. but whatever, we let it go, there’s football to play. then that offseason tee decides to cause some chaos i guess and confirms that actually ja’marr HAS bought joe clothes ‘multiple times’ so that’s. something!!! (along with TB in that one pivot podcast with all three of them teasing ja’marr about it!!) and then SOMEHOW none of this gets brought up again until a few months ago when ja’marr is just like “yeah actually i’ve been buying him clothes since last year” which is still a year later than he first said he bought him clothes 🤔

ALL OF WHICH TO SAY that ja’marr is fucking weird about this. he may or may not buy joe clothes (i’m still leaning yes on this), and he may or may not want people to know about it. i think he realizes just how intimate of a thing that is, to repeatedly buy someone you care about clothes that you think he would like, that you’d like to see him in. and i think if we go back to my Vision of insecure at times ja’marr, it’s one way to explain his back and forth on this.

but then!! insert kyle, who i believe only became joe’s stylist within the last year. before that i don’t think joe ever really had anyone Official to help him out with specific outfits/styles/branding etc (i’m sure the joe girlies will correct me if i'm wrong on this). and now i can only imagine that ja’marr might be feeling a little…possessive of joe here (what else is new lol ‘that’s my qb not their qb’ type shit). like if we believe he’s been buying him clothes since at least 2021, that’s like…that’s ja’marr’s Thing at this point?? even if it only started happening in 2023, that’s still a long time of "oh hey i saw this and thought of you and will you wear it and when you wear it will i feel a little thrill knowing that you took my advice knowing that you value my opinion knowing that the clothes touching your skin are only doing so because i bought them for you in the first place etc etc." and now here’s joe paying someone else to do it?? and who the fuck is kyle why him why does HE get to do it he didn’t even win a national championship with him in college???? (ja’marr obviously would be more rational than that. of course joe should pay someone to help him out with style as he does events and builds his brand more. but as a fellow Emotional Person myself, the rational response is never the first or strongest one.) 

so like! there’s that. that alone could make ja’marr not inclined to LOVE Kyle, ya know? and then if we want to get really Deep and dive into internalized homophobia of Male Athlete Culture. of my version (MY VERSION JUST MY VERSION THIS IS NOT ME SAYING ANYTHING IRL ABOUT HIM) of ja’marr and how he might cope with feelings and attractions that do not neatly fall in line with what is Expected of him and Has Been Expected of him since he was a kid. like fuck. do we remember how his dad said ja’marr used to like to read with his cousins (who were girls) but then his male friends came around and made fun of him for it, so he stopped reading altogether as a child?? thinking about that still makes my heart hurt! aughhh Gender!! and then even a few weeks ago on stream when ja’marr accidentally said that kyrie was sexy and IMMEDIATELY the chat and his friends jumped on him for it!! like yeah it was all lighthearted and all that but he got all embarrassed and even fucking apologized??? just the immediate policing of language/behavior followed by the immediate apology and moving on to no longer watching kyrie clips lol. crazy!!! Male Athlete Culture is SUCH a trip!! 

and kyle is gay! very much out and proud and not hiding or ashamed of any of it (fucking good for him tbh. i know he’s not Loved in this fandom but like that does genuinely take guts to be yourself like that in a culture like this. and make a career out of it! and he seems to be thriving!) and i just have to wonder like, how many queer people ja’marr really knows well?? the nfl has their corporate pride month bullshit where they celebrate the like 1 out gay assisant coach? 1 out gay FORMER player? if there are more queer people in the nfl, they are not very public about it. so again, how much daily interaction does a typical football player like ja’marr get with queer people?? i do imagine all the connections that are growing with the fashion world help of course! like kyle! who it’s clear he’s at least friendly with, if not the best of friends. and so like, i wonder about how that could stir complicated emotions in ja’marr if we go with my (AGAIN JUST MINE I’M NOT ACTUALLY SAYING ANYTHING IRL) version of him as a guy who has Feelings about male teammates sometimes and struggles with Dealing With That. 

and throw in the fact that ja’marr primarily knows him as this guy who’s always hanging around joe lol. taking over his role as joe’s personal stylist?? being free and open and ALLOWED to be attracted to all these guys, to joe himself!! (and if he thinks too hard about that he REALLY gets in his feelings). and it’s not jealousy really because he knows how important he himself is in joe’s life. kyle’s not replacing their history, he’s certainly not replacing his value to joe on the field, their close friendship, etc. but! he occupies a space in joe’s life that ja’marr can’t touch. he can publicly and proudly buy joe clothes. something that ja’marr WANTS but keeps shying away from. he can feel any feelings and any attraction he happens to have, he’s not hiding any part of who he is. if he thinks joe’s hot, if he thinks joe looks particularly attractive in an outfit he chose for him, he can! he will! he does! and i think that that just HAS to drive ja’marr a little fucking crazy.

so yeah. he likes the guy. they’re friendly. he’ll do a goofy lil dance when prompted by him for social media. but it’s Complicated. it’s Very Complicated. (to me.) 

[lovelytsunoda]

chateau ( feel alright ) | kyle kirkwood

summary: powers out in andretti house. stuck working together on a project for their business marketing class, kyle and yn find themselves stuck in his dorm with no lights and no heating

pairing: college!kyle kirkwood x college! reader

warnings: you’ve heard of only one bed, get ready for only one ✨blanket✨ santino slander (and rightly so). kyle is such a himbo my lordy I love him. kinda slow burn since they don’t kiss right until the end (sort like in my other Kyle fic lmao)

there was a certain kind of charm to kyle kirkwoods dorm room at andretti house.

sure, the florida panthers jersey hung above the couch screamed ‘frat boy’ and he had an impressive collection of shot glasses lined up underneath the tv, and since he and his roommate were both hockey players, the main room tended to stink of sweaty locker room as they liked their gear in a corner, but it was proof that people lived there.

kyle never would have been her first choice as partner for this assignment, but she didn’t have many friends left in the program, and they’d all paired up with each other. lest she get paired with santino, who was so much of an asshole that she would rather get hit by a bus than work on a mid term with him, she’d turned to the boy who was sitting behind her and asked if he had a partner yet.

kyle thought he was crazy for saying yes. typically he paired with colton and the two of them somehow wrangled their way to an a-minus. everybody knew that professor rahal was a hardass, so every choice in partner counted.

but when he saw her pretty, pleading eyes behind those wire rimmed glasses, he couldn’t find it in him to turn her down.

“according to the simulation, social media interaction including view counts is higher when we post reel-like content.”

kyle was barely listening, watching as her delicate fingers tracked across the keyboard. her earrings were little gold pumpkins, they complimented her skin nicely. everything about her was warm and inviting.

he’d let her connect to the dorms small speaker system, and she’d chosen a britpop playlist, an early oasis song playing softly in the background. it wasn’t something he’d thought she’d listen to, but now that he could see her tapping her fingernails on the keyboard while she hummed along, it just seemed to make perfect sense, fitting in perfectly with his vision of her.

kyle kirkwood was totally and utterly infatuated with her.

“kyle?” she asked softly “are you listening to me?”

he blinked rapidly, trying to remember what she had asked. “yes, right, you were talking about short form video content and engagement.”

“I’m impressed.” she smiled. “you’re smarter than you look, kirkwood.”

“I aim to please.”

“good. now give me a hand with this next bit.”

she beckoned kyle over with two fingers, making space for him in the rug next to the coffee table. their mismatched dollar-store mugs of coffee were empty on the table behind her laptop, papers and notebooks spread out across the table.

“now, for this part here-“ she was cut off by an ominous beep, all the lights in the dormitory shutting off one by one.

the clocks on the stovetop and microwave shut off soon after, the living room illuminated only by her laptop, which now proudly displayed the “no internet” message.

“shit.” she cursed, leaning back against the couch. “the outage crashed the simulation.”

“well,” kyle tried to stay positive. “there’s got to be something that we can do in the meantime. truth or dare? never have i ever?”

she laughed, head in her hands. she could smell his cologne from here. well, she was sure it more like aerosol deodorant. something strong, like axe or lynx.

“what are you, five?”

all kyle could smell was her. vanilla and cinnamon. she was intoxicating.

“yeah. five heads taller than you.”

she paused, looking at him with a confused glance before she burst out laughing. god, he loved hearing her laugh. “kyle, that’s so bad!”

kyle laughed along with her until he felt the temperature in the flat had dropped markedly. he could see her shiver, his protective instincts jumping out.

he pushed himself up from the floor, disappearing into his small room. there wasn’t much in there. just some hockey gear, a desk, a twin bed and a rickety bookshelf. there was a plush blanket folded up at the foot of the bed, which he grabbed after pulling a cable knit sweater over his head.

he went back into the living room, gently draping the blanket over he shoulders.

“better?” he asked quietly, feeling some kind of intimacy that definitely wasn’t there before. his hand still rested on her upper back, warm and grounding through the blanket as she pulled it around her shoulders.

“warmer, yeah.” she turned to face him, rubbing at the corner of her eye. “what do we do now?”

“we could watch a movie or something until the power comes back on.” kyle suggested. “logan isn’t supposed to be back until later, you can stay as long as you want.”

he really didn’t want her to leave. in fact, he wanted her to stay forever, turn his silly dorm into a home. he wanted to be with her for as long as possible.

“I suppose so. It’s not like we can do anything constructive, and I don’t want the night to be a total write off. do you have a dvd player?”

Kyle raised an eyebrow. “you do?”

“it’s to watch my criminal minds box set.”

“I was just going to use my cell phone data. I have unlimited.” kyle said, switching on netflix. “what did you want to see?”

“how much do you like matthew mcconaughey and have you ever heard of the lincoln lawyer?” she grinned. “it’s one of my favourite legal thrillers.”

Kyle pulled up the movie as she shut her laptop, propping the phone up against one of the empty mugs. they settled in next to each other, hands resting on the ground with a conspicuous gap between them.

she yearned to reach over and take Kyle’s hand in hers, but the idea of being flirted with just made her fell so awkward and uncomfy. she just wanted a warm, comfortable love, but she supposed she had to start somewhere.

she inches her pink in finger towards Kyle’s multiple times before eventually bringing her hand back and settling it in her lap, pulling the blanket tighter.

Kyle turned to look at her, the way her face was illuminated in the soft blue light. on the screen, tv lawyer mickey haller was meeting with a new client in the county lockup. Kyle was mesmerized at the soft concentration on her face, the way her face was gently scrunched with focus.

a shiver ran through his body, and he found himself reaching for a corner of the blanket.

“Kyle.” she laughed. god, Kyle would do anything to hear that laugh again. “this is my blanket. go get your own.”

he was so fucking whipped.

“what if I miss something important?” he tried to give her his best impression at puppy dog eyes. “you’d have to explain the whole movie to me, I’d be so lost.”

she smiled, rolling her eyes. “fine.” she unwrapped herself, tossing one end of the panthers blanket to the man next to her. “but don’t be a blanket hog.”

“I make no promises.”

they had to move closer together to be able to properly share the blanket with each other. their Jean clad legs were almost touching, a nervous energy surrounding the duo as they kept their eyes trained on kyle’s iphone.

“Kyle?” she asked quietly, voice barely audible. “would it be strange if I said I wanted to kiss you right now?”

Kyle turned to face her, reaching over to pause the movie. “I’d actually like that a lot.” he smiled nervously, reaching out to hold her face.

her skin was soft, and she keener into his touch, biting back a sigh.

when he kissed her, it felt warm and inviting. a comforting addition to her life, rather than fireworks and burst of electricity that would have disrupted it. his lips were soft as they moved against hers, and it felt like coming home.

she sighed under his touch, reaching out to gently run her fingers through his hair.

she didn’t want to stop kissing him.

and he didn’t want to stop kissing her.

Kyle’s face was rosy, or it would have been if she could see anything.

“you’re really good at that.” he whispered into the dark, totally in awe of the woman in front of him.

“I dunno, I think I need a bit more practice.” she joked, hand resting on his knee. “maybe you could help me out.”

“gladly.” he beamed, leaning in to kiss her again.

[wendytestabrat]

why kyman is NOTHING like heiman (FROM THE VAULT [2020]) PT. 1

There’s A LOT of evidence that Kyman would be nothing like Heiman. First of all Kyle actually knows how to whip Cartman and get Cartman under control which Heidi did not know how to do. Every single time Heidi would bitch at Cartman he would get annoyed and not listen to a thing she says and try to get rid of her or get away from her. But Cartman LOVES it when Kyle bitches at him and he gets a kick out of it, and Cartman actually likes being around Kyle and cares about what Kyle has to say and listens to him. There are a lot of moments that show that Cartman is capable of expressing empathy and concern around Kyle, wheras Cartman gave 0 shits about Heidi and their relationship went absolutely nowhere. I think a huge example of this was when Cartman & Kyle were in the detention center, Kyle yelled at Cartman to go get him some aluminum foil and scissors and Cartman was like “aluminum foil and some scissors ok” because he saw how upset Kyle was with him and he wanted to fix things. Which rlly shows that even if they do fight and shit they would know how to work it out with each other and forgive each other over whatever happens. I think the only reason why Cartman likes to pick on and torment Kyle so much is to get his attention, but usually once Cartman does have Kyle’s full attention and Kyle goes along with whatever Cartman does, Cartman is nice and treats him with respect. And a hugeee example of this was in “Crack Baby Athletic Association” when Kyle joined Cartman for the crack baby thing, Cartman was really nice to Kyle throughout the entire episode and called him smart and stuff and gave him a hug and all that. And Cartman was listening to everything Kyle had to say and the things Kyle wanted to do for the company. The reason Cartman was tormenting Heidi was bc he just didn’t care about her at all and wanted her to go away LMAO. And we already talked about how in “Tonsil Trouble” after Cartman infected Kyle with aids he was all happy and in a good mood to get to go on a trip with Kyle and tried to hold Kyle’s hand. And another small example of Kyle actually being able to whip Cartman just like he did in “Mexican Joker”, was in “Raisins” when Cartman was making fun of Stan for being upset about losing Wendy, Kyle told Cartman to stop and so he did. And I’m sure there are a ton of other examples like this but those are the best I can think of right now, the bottom line is I’m sure if Kyman happened Cartman would listen to Kyle and respect him and be willing to do what he says. I mean I know it would probably be challenging for Kyle to deal with Cartman, bc we all know how Cartman is. He would still probably do whatever the fuck he wanted to do a lot of the time, but I’m sure he would still make an effort to listen to Kyle and take what he has to say into consideration. And do you really think that Cartman would be able to pull the shit he pulled on Heidi on Kyle? LMAOOOO Kyle knows Cartman wayyyy better than Heidi and can see right through his bs and Kyle always knows when Cartman is up to no good. Like remember when Cartman tricked Heidi into eating that ‘beyond kfc’ which made her fat? There’s NO WAY Kyle would fall for something like that, he would stop Cartman right away and call him out on what he’s doing.

[reinerismwrld]

If This Was A Movie/How You Get The Girl

PAIRING: Kenny McCormick x Reader

SUMMARY: “And that’s how it works. That’s how you got the girl.”

GENRE: Fluff.

WARNINGS: None that I’m aware of.

WORD COUNT: 2.6k words

Act 1: If This Was A Movie

“Dude, you like Y/n?” Kenny locked his phone after hearing Kyle’s question. He thought no one could see his screen, but not everything could go as he wished. Kenny quickly hid his phone, but he knew it was already late. 

“Who’s Y/n?” Clyde asked, wanting to know what Kyle and Kenny were talking about.

“A girl who was our friend for what? Eight years?” Kenny only nodded. Clyde returned his attention to the screen in front of him. Kyle asked again at his lack of response, but this time in a lower tone so Clyde wouldn’t listen.

“Kenny, do you like her?”

“I dunno…” Kenny sighed. He really didn’t know. He may have seen you as a potential partner, but that was when you were 15. Now that he was 22, he felt more confused than when he was a teenager. “It’s just that recently I can’t get her out of my mind. A few days ago, I saw her with her parents walking down the street, and… God, she looked so pretty. I mean, she was already beautiful back in the day. But she looked more mature. And also, she’s been more active on her insta, and she seems so happy. There’s something about her smile that messes up with my head.”

“Dude, you do like her!”

“Fuck” the realization was something Kenny was trying to evade at any cost. It’s not that he hated the idea of you two dating. He’s scared, mainly because you’ve barely talked for years. What if you didn’t like him? How could he like someone he hardly has spoken to? “What am I gonna do, Kyle?”

“You have to do something, Ken.” Kyle could see how his best friend was scared. But maybe this was what Kenny had needed after so long, you. He knew something had changed within Kenny the moment you stopped talking, and seeing Kenny finally be honest with his feelings was refreshing to Kyle.

“Like what? What if she’s not interested? I mean, look at her. Someone like her definitely has people going after her.”

“I mean, yeah, she’s prettier than before… Answer this. Has she uploaded something regarding a potential partner or something along those lines?” Kyle asked.

“Well, not really. It’s always her friends or family. Not a single guy in sight.”

“There you go. Instead of pouting and looking at your phone screen. Do something about those feelings.”

“I think I like him, Wendy,” you confessed to your best friend.

“Who?”

“Kenny.” you heard a scream come out of your phone speaker, making you move your phone away from you.

“I KNEW IT. OMG. SINCE WHEN?”

“I think I figured it out a few weeks ago. I mean, he uploaded a photo of him in the gym, and god, he looks so fucking handsome. After that, I started to remember all the times we were together and how sweet he was. I know I tend to lie to myself, saying we were only friends back in the day, but the more I think about it, the more I realize I liked him back in high school.” you said worriedly.

“Why the tone? You should be happy you are finally being honest with yourself and admitting your feelings towards him.”

“I don’t know, Wen. Do you realize we haven’t talked in years? What if he doesn’t like me now? Hell, I don’t even know if I liked him back in the day. Now that the years have passed, how am I supposed to do something about my feelings? I think the best I can do right now is forget how I feel and see if it helps.”

“No. Sorry, but I’m not letting you suppress your feelings just because you are scared. We’ve never talked about Kenny properly, but now that the topic’s here, I want to know how you felt when he was your friend?” you sighed and started remembering everything.

“Well, He was protective over me. He always made sure I was ok and made me feel happy whenever I was feeling down. I remember the first time I saw him. It was second grade. He was so cute. I knew I liked him, even if, back in the day, I didn’t really understand what “liking” felt. I just knew it. But, of course, nothing happened. There was this one girl who told our teacher we were passing on notes, and we got in trouble. Fortunately, Kenny was smart and broke the notes into little pieces. We just had to make up a story regarding the legible words on the remaining pieces.” you smiled at the memory. “After that, I believe we had this mutual and unsaid agreement just to stop whatever we had going on. That’s why after that, we became best friends.”

“Why you never told me about that?”

“Well, it’s not like I remember every single memory with Kenny, you know? I remember that because it was the moment I knew nothing would happen between us.”

“But just because of that, you stopped liking him?”

“Wendy, I got in trouble for that. My mom never bought whatever lie Kenny and I came up with. She knew better. Wen, one of the pieces, literally had the word “love.”

“WHAT?” Wendy shouted once again, making you close your eyes.

“Wen, I swear to god you’re gonna leave me deaf if you keep shouting like that.” 

“Sorry, sorry. But care to explain the “love” part, please?” you sighed. You never told this to anyone. You thought it was going to be something you took to your grave.

“He told me he loved me” You knew what was coming next, so you removed your ear from the speaker.

“MY GOD!!! YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING! OMG OMG OMG.” You smiled at your friend’s excitement.

“I know!”

“But at that age, he knew what love was?” Wendy questioned.

“I guess so. At that moment, I just smiled at the confession, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized those were some strong feelings right there.”

“God, you do have a history with him… Now I understand why you keep thinking about him after all these years. He was basically your first love.”

“You think that?”

“Duh. It’s more than obvious.” That was something you didn’t like to hear. It confirmed your worst fear of all. He was something more than just your childhood friend. And Wendy was right. Kenny was someone who you couldn’t just forget that easily, not after he was your friend for years. “The more I hear about the two of you, the more I realize you are meant to be together. And now we have to make a plan for that to happen.”

“Can you just answer that damn story? You’ve watched it at least 15 times Kenny” Karen sighed tiredly. 

“What if it’s not for me?”

“Of course, it’s for you, you dumb….”

“Hey!”

“I’m sorry, it’s just… I’ve known the two of you literally since I was born, and Y/n obviously likes you back. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t post everything she wants to do until she has a boyfriend for you to see.”

“What if it’s for another guy” Karen closed her eyes and counted to 10.

“Ok, first of all, is it just a normal insta story for everyone to see, or is it a “close friends” story?”

“Close friends”

“Great! Then you have your answer.”

“But what if she just forgot to remove me from her close friends?” Kenny felt really troubled. He was so in love with you, but he didn’t dare to be direct and say it to you. He’s been so heartbroken and lost so much in his life. He doesn’t want to lose again now that he has you back in his life. He preferred to have you as only his friend than to confess and lose you if you didn’t feel the same.

“Kenny, since when are you this scared of confessing to a girl?”

“Since Y/n is the one we are talking about.”

WENDY: Did he see it?

Y/N: Yeah

WENDY: And…?

Y/N: He didn’t answer to it.

WENDY: Ugh, I thought it was gonna work

Y/N: Me too

WENDY: I just don’t understand. He obviously likes you back

Y/N: Look, we just came to that conclusion from his CF stories. What if they were meant for someone else? And there’s also the fact that we just started talking after so many years of going no contact with each other. What if I just misunderstood everything?

WENDY: Don’t you even dare to begin overthinking about this. Wasn’t he the one who just posted, “If I added you to my CF, obviously I want to make out with you.” That was your opportunity to answer that story!

Y/N: I know, ugh, why am I like this? I don’t wanna blow it up. Not that he’s back in my life

WENDY: I know it was hard to have him back as your friend after so long. But it’s so obvious he likes you back.

Y/N: Who am I even kidding? I know, and I really like him too. I’m running out of ideas to make him confess, Wen.

WENDY: I just know the two of you are gonna be together. He’s just stupid and dumb and way too shy for his good, and it doesn’t help you are just like him.

Y/N: I’m gonna ignore that.

WENDY: You were made for each other.

Y/N: I swear to god...

WENDY: But on a serious note. From what you’ve told me, he’s a nice guy, yeah, horny, but you’re just as horny as him. And he seems sweet and polite when it comes to you. I know you are scared, but imagine how he’s feeling. I’m pretty sure he’s as frightened as you are. You told me you were the best of friends before you stopped talking.

Y/N: True, but what if he sees me only as his childhood best friend?

WENDY: Yeah, right. You don’t post about wanting to cuddle and kiss and do all the unimaginable to the person you like for your childhood best friend to see. He wants you as more.

Y/N: I don’t wanna get my hopes high, Wen. Not with him. I can’t lose him again.

WENDY: Think about it this way. Would you like to take the risk and be honest with him knowing he’s gonna say yes? Or never tell him how you feel and regret that decision for the rest of your life?

Act 2: How You Get The Girl

“Where are you going?”

“To see Y/n, I’m going to tell her how I feel.”

“Wow, hold your horse Kenny. First of all, I’m glad you finally made a positive decision in your entire life, but it’s raining. What are you going to do? Stand outside in the rain until she comes out, or what?”

“That would be pretty romantic, don’t you think?” Kenny smirked, putting on his sweatshirt.

“Yeah, and also pretty stupid, in my opinion.”

“She posted this story about cuddling while it’s raining, and as you said, it was meant for me. I’m going to her house.” Karen never saw her brother this determined. She knew nothing was going to stop him.

“You’re gonna get sick, Ken.”

"I don't care. I just want her by my side." Kenny said as he was exiting his house.

A million scenarios crossed Kenny’s mind. What if he just misunderstood the whole situation? A fear crept on the back of his neck. He was starting to get anxious. What if you did think he was insane to just confess out of nowhere? When he least expected it, he was at your front door. This was it. Now or never, Kenny thought. He knocked three times. 

You heard the knocking from your bedroom. You really didn’t want to open the door. But your parents were out, and you knew your mother was waiting for packages, still when you thought about it, no one in their right state of mind would deliver while it was raining outside. More to your dismay, you got up, and you were glad you did.

“Are you insane, Kenny?!” 

“Hi,” Kenny smiled at you, making your heart stop. God, you missed that smile.

“What are you doing here?” Kenny gulped at your question. He needed to take all the courage he had.

You felt your heart in your ears. You’ve only dreamt of this moment, but he was here. This wasn’t your dream.

“I… I want you. I don’t care about what happened between us in the past, and for the first time in my life, I’m more than sure I want you for worse or for better. I’ve been waiting for this opportunity for years, and I’ve missed you so much. I know we started to drift apart, but I know things happen for a reason, and whatever I’ve done led me right here. You may not feel the same, or maybe you do. I just know I would wait for you all my life until you’re mine.”

You smiled. You felt your heart wanting to get out of your chest. Droplets of rain started to fall from Kenny’s hair, and that was when you realized he was still standing in the rain. You quickly extended your hand to him, and when he took it, you made him enter your house.

“You’re soaking wet. You need to change your clothes as soon as possible. If not, you will get sick. Come in.” You started to go to the bathroom, but Kenny grabbed your hand, stopping you. He turned you around, pulling you closer to him. You didn’t say anything, only looked at him in those beautiful eyes. Kenny started soaking your clothes, but right now, you have more important things to worry or be excited about.

“You’re not going to say anything?” he grabbed one of your cheeks and whispered, getting closer to you.

“Like what? Like how that was the most romantic but crazy moment I’ve had? Like how many times I’ve waited for something like this to happen? Or maybe I could say how I would also wait for you my entire life… Does that please you?” you whispered. He was so close to your face. You could feel his lips ghosting yours.

“You’re gonna get sick if you don’t shower and change your clothes, Ken.”

“I couldn’t care less.” his other hand grabbed your other cheek, cupping your face. You gulped as you saw Kenny lick his lips.

“Are you just gonna do something or-” Kenny only smiled and gave you a quick kiss on the lips. Even if it was short, you still felt his lips lingering. You didn’t move, nor did he. It was as if the two of you wanted to remember this moment perfectly. The two of you just stayed there, smiling, standing like two idiots in love. Which you were.

“Wanna change and cuddle?” you asked him.

“So it was for me to see,” he smirked.

“Of course it was. You’re the only one that can see my CF stories. Well, Wendy can also see them, but she’s my best friend….” you saw Kenny with the biggest smile. It was like he just needed to hear that. And he did. He took a leap of faith, risking everything, and he was euphoric to know you also felt the same for him.

“Do you, maybe, want to be my girlfriend?”

“Yes. I would love to.” You wrapped your arms around Kenny’s neck, pulling him for another kiss. This time a longer and more passionate kiss. You’ve finally got the person you love the most back. And it was amazing.

n a v i g a t i o n

[milk-crater]

Lets see, how about something for Kyle o'reilly + the tower (oh no D: )

Kyle fell easily. It was part of why he was glad Adam was still on the shelf, as shitty as the thought made him feel. If Cole were at AEW tapings, Kyle knew for all his talk of “doing it on his own,” he’d fall sway under Cole’s blue eyes as soon as he smiled at him.

So what did he do instead? Fall sway under another Adam. Edge—it was hard to think of your childhood hero by a civi name like ‘Adam Copleland’—always looked askew at Kyle every time Kyle ran to the older man’s rescue. He accepted the help, but cautiously, weary of Kyle’s wide-eyed devotion, as if expecting for Kyle to drop a bomb like that he was Copeland’s long-long son and start demanding child support back payments. He didn’t get that Kyle’s admiration was genuine. Here was a guy who’d been told he couldn’t wrestler because of a neck issue, but was raising hell at 50! It made Kyle think that maybe he still had plenty road to run too, that he too could someday be a crazy old man.

And then Copeland fell. Fell from the top of a steel cage and onto his tibia.

Kyle was adrift again. Orange Cassidy was a cool guy, but too aloof for Kyle to get truly close too.

MarK Briscoe was the opposite of aloof. He was outgoing and magnetic, and Kyle felt tugged along in his wake, smiling for the first time since he returned to the ring.

But within that joy was a kernel of fear. What if he lost this new lodestar as easily as he’d lost all the others?

“Hey, Mark.” Kyle was on the phone with him just before Forbidden Door. Mark was the type who preferred actual phone calls to text. “Good luck in the ladder match tonight. You’ll make a great TNT champion. Just...be careful, okay, man?”

“Whhhaaaa? Be careful? In a ladder match?! That’s like trying to ask a towel to stay damp during a house fire! You don’t win a ladder match by being careful, baby! You know what the word of the day is? There ain’t no word of the day today, because the word of the day is ‘regrets’, and we ain’t going to have those, you hear me?”

Briscoe’s boisterous words rattled out of the phone speaker. Kyle chuckled even as his heart clenched. “I hear you. It’s just…I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

Mark was unusually quiet on the line.

“Hey, you know what you and me have in common, Kyle?” Mark asked. “The worst thing that will ever happen to us has already happened to us. So don’t we got to be afraid of it anymore.”

Kyle remembered meeting Jay Briscoe back in ROH, back before Kyle’s injury, back before Jay’s car crash.

I hope you’re right, Mark, Kyle thought, but didn’t say. It felt like too much of a wah-wah, Charlie Brown downer of a reply. So instead he forced a smile and tried to match Mark’s optimism.

“Right. No more fear, no more regrets.”

[sniper-the-silly]

hello! i found your mgs oc kira very interesting, can you tell me more about them? (If you're ok with it ofc)

AHHH SURE!!! I don't have all of her lore figured out I'm still changing some things but uhhh i have a doc :p

1972 – Kira is born into the Valentine family two years after Evan Valentine (Machete Jackal) is born. Her family consisted of herself, Red, Gem, Evan, Hunter (whereabouts unknown by Gem).

1974 – Peace Walker incident occurred; Kira, Evan, and Gem were transported to a peninsula away from Mother Base for safety reasons. Kira and Evan played no part in Peace Walker Incident. (Kaz did in fact favor her though which annoyed Red bc beef)

1975 – GZ incident. Kira, Evan, Red, and Gem are all split up. Kira and Evan are kidnapped by XOF. Evan is sold off to soviet soldiers; Kira is kept for parasite experimentation (the splotches shit Quiet has).

1983 – Kira escapes from XOF, runs off to Afghanistan

1984 – Fights against V and Quiet. Quiet tranqs her and they take her back to Mother Base. Is immediately fascinated by Kaz because he seemed familiar to her (wow, really?)

Ocelot: Indifferent towards her, but does like that she wants to learn how to shoot revolvers properly (Learns how in later years)

Quiet: Sees Kira as a little sister, willing to protect her at all costs (gives Kira a small butterfly clip before leaving, can always be found on her in the health screen as a Easter egg :3)

V: First impression was that she was just another child soldier – found out quickly that she was worth a lot more than she looked (Teaches her everything about fighting and combat)

Kaz: Found her to be familiar until he realized she was Red’s daughter. Described as giving her “special treatment” by Ocelot to which Kaz continuously denies. (Co-teaches her pre and post Gulf War)

Hunter: Naturally acts as her aunt and is super protective over her

Eli: Sees her as a rival, but does get along with her on rare occasions.

Miranda: Literally sees her as her best friend and they bond almost instantly over their enjoyment of making stuff with LITERAL sticks (those mfing kids could probably recreate a whole dang metal gear out of sticks if they wanted to)

Machete/Evan: Knows of him from Soviet camp, but doesn't remember him being her older brother

1989 --16 years old - first starts training under diamond dogs

Gets a diamond dogs tattoo on her left arm

1990– Gulf War

Kira goes into battle as a sniper

She gets injured by a grenade, losing half of her ribcage but is saved by Kyle (oh goody…)

Is in a coma until end of Gulf War

1992 – Recovery stages (develops a weed problem?)

1995 – Part of outer heaven

Solid infiltrates the base and kills everyone including Kyle

Finds V In the end clinging to life and listens to one last song with him while they both smoke a cigar 💔

V makes her promise to not kill Solid because it wasn't his fault

1996 – Joins FOXHOUND

Gets to know Solid and considers him a pretty cool guy to hang out with

Kaz helps train her further and suggests the codename Bullet Jackal to which Colonel Campbell agrees to

Gets a FOXHOUND tattoo on her right arm

1999 – Zanzibar

Reunites with Miranda who is under the codename Knife or Knife Feline

Knife flips out and attacks Bullet by trying to shove her into an incinerator but Bullet counters it and instead Knife is burned

Knife scratches Bullet, giving her the stitched face scar

Rescues Silver Crow (16)

Bullet is injured from Gray Fox and the metal gear, requiring Solid to carry her out

2001 – 2004

Retired in Alaska with occasional trips to Hawaii (the one time she gets to relax)

2005 – Shadow Moses

Bullet reunites with Solid

Wolf's death especially shook her to her core because she viewed Wolf as a little sister

Mantis says something along the lines of Bullet being “a broken heart and a shattered soul. Only surviving off of pure instinct, alone.” Like her code name implies, (Jackals represent loneliness, abandonment, and death)

Blames herself for not being able to protect Meryl and for not being able to convince the others to join her side

Fights Knife twice (once in snowfield, the other when Liquid launches REX)

Kills Knife after the second fight (they just beat the shit out of each other )

Is left behind to fend for herself because she wanted Meryl, Otacon and Snake to get out of there

Reunites with Machete

2007 – Tanker incident

Is shook cause she thinks Solid is dead

2009 – Vigilante thing with Machete

Meets Raiden and gives him pointers throughout the game

Finds out Snake isn't dead and when he reveals himself, she literally starts beating on him until he grabs her arms to make her stop

2010 – Kidnapped and shipped off to Africa

2012 – Escapes with the help of Crow and Machete

Meets Lan, Reyn and Ghost

2013 – NBGO (Never Be Game Over) is established – Bullet is commander

2014 – Reunites with Snake and Otacon (again)

Crow is taken by B&B Unit and is killed

2016 – Loses her right ear and three fingers, gets mechanical Jackal parts as a substitution

Kinda a giant lore dump grghg (also never really mentioned, but I sort of ship her with Snavid)

[raisindave]

[Chapter 2] Seeing the World Through Ballistic-Tinted Glasses

Calling it a “whole women’s dormitory wing” was bold. What you encountered was more of a broom closet at the end of a hallway, with all the modern amenities of ceiling tiling that you’re almost positive is covered with asbestos. On the bright side, you had the luxury of having a bathroom to yourself, diligently marked by a yellow sticky note taped to the door with the word “Women’s” on it.

The sound of the familiar beeping of your standard-issue wristwatch forced you to remember that you were in an unfamiliar bed. You slap your hand down on the watch beside your bed, lazily running your thumb along its edge to flick the off button. Begrudgingly dragging your sluggish body from the heavy comfort of your warm blankets, it was time to get up and report for duty. Whatever that duty was.

Stepping down your hallway, you spy the unmistakable classic military special of pale oak circular tables signifying a mess hall: pale green linoleum floors, creased and bumpy from age, wear, and harsh climate. Almost on queue, a chair screeched backwards, detecting motion as you rounded the corner.

“Salsaaaa, nice to meet you. I’m John, but you can call me Soap.” You couldn’t easily forget his mohawk hairstyle, paired with the thick Scottish accent aligning with the flag emblem on his profile. “That’s Kyle Garrick. We call him Gaz.”

Gaz smiled and raised a hand in a dutiful wave, rising to hike over to greet you. Tall, slender, with dark, kind eyes that didn’t match the vicious demeanour you’d expect with someone with his confirmed kill count.

“Big fucker is Ghost, but you’re welcome to call him-”

“We’re going rucking, be geared in 20,” ‘Big fucker’ interjected, commanding the air out of the room.

Your eyebrows furrowed, a sly smile tugging at your lips as your eyes darted to gauge the reaction of your newfound comrades. You hadn’t gone rucking in ages—one of the perks of being a specialist. There was no way they were saying you had to go rucking with them. The thermostat said the outdoor temperature was a crisp -32 c, and the sun had no intention of rising for at least another two hours.

So much for being “just a translator.”

Ghost finally rose, though you wish he didn’t. His size triggered your fight or flight response, and Ghost would raise your hackles if you were a dog. That pale, skeletal mask crudely stitched onto a dark balaclava was like something straight out of a nightmare. You can see how this mask might effectively intimidate enemies, but you struggle to understand why he’s wearing it around comrades. You keep your gaze forward and back straight as instinctive compliance kicks in. Heavy, rhythmic footsteps approached you.

“This isn’t a vacation,” he leaned forward, penetrating your field of view, “lives are on the line, Corporal.”

“Yes, Lieutenant,” Words were jutting out of you as if you’d just been punched in the gut.

Rucking is not for the faint of heart. At least, not for you. For all you know, it could be a piece of cake. However, specialists usually get a pass to dodge rucking requirements with the excuse of study or practice. Price must have assumed that position, seeing as he was absent. A lack of training, compounded by a beyond hostile climate, meant the pack of equipment on your back was immensely heavy, even at a stationary position outside the base, especially not at the ass crack of the morning.

Ghost was leading the group, three perfect soldiers dutifully wearing their snow camouflage like they were born to it. The three of them were elegant, armoured troopers, willing and able to snuff the life out of a person in an instant. You, however, look like a tire company mascot. The smallest possible issue for the thermal pants left masses of unused fabric on your ankles and wrists. At least the elastic-based balaclava was snug on your face. White puffs of steam from everyone’s mouths stated the obvious: It’s fucking cold.

The boys didn’t make it easy either, dropping into dead sprints at indeterminate intervals, scrambling up cliff faces. Digging the heels of your boots into the snow, a slide down a small hill offered an infinitesimal break from the weight on your shoulders, swiftly followed by the next task of rising to your feet and catching up.

Air burned into your lungs, scorching your throat and searing into your chest. Cold, sweet spit floods into your open mouth. It’s hard to think straight when every ounce of energy goes toward lifting each foot out of the sinking snow, but it’s harder even to consider having to scan for hypothetical enemies in this condition.

“I take it they don’t go rucking much in the Shire, hey Salsa?” Called a Scottish voice from the top of a sheer hill you hadn’t even considered climbing. That’s a tally of two jokes about your height, and it’s not even been 12 hours.

He’ll have to settle for stern eye contact as an answer, which he smirked back at and disappeared behind the hill. Lacking dexterity thanks to the subzero climate, gloved fingers fumbled to grip powdery snow as you heaved your knees up to support the climb. Hot puffs of white steam cloud your vision and the top of the hill.

The scenery was beautiful, at least. A moment's pause gave your body a short moment to stop aching in strain to let you consider the view. Cresting sun over the frozen territory, a blanket of muffling snow made the whole world sound wonderfully silent. This virgin wilderness is like something out of a Bob Ross painting, and it could almost make the rucking worth it. Almost.

“We head back to base camp. Keep up.” Ghost’s husky Manchester accent cut through the silence; it took your frozen mind a moment to register his barbed comment. His frigid gaze sends a chill through your core that the sub-zero climate could never achieve.

Downhill was easy until it wasn’t. The boys made it look easy, gliding over the snow like it didn’t affect them. They even had the nerve to talk while they outran you easily, Gaz jumping up to swat at heavy tree branches, dumping snow on Soap, who ran behind him. Their boots don’t even sink into the snow like yours do. They don’t fumble, or wheeze or sweat. It was Soap who approached your narrow field of view, he had turned around to wait for you to jog along.

Pockets of hot and cold air settled in all the wrong places. Sweat pooled under your blazing hot thermal jacket while the promise of frostbite kissed the exposed skin on your wrist. There’s something sickening about the overstimulation, screaming into your conscience with each step.

Wordlessly meeting his unreadable blue eyes, he gripped the back of your pack, heaving it free from your shoulders, slipping his arms through the loops. Featherlight relief flooded into you as you unburdened your shoulders from the pack. Having adjusted to carrying all the extra weight, you almost effortlessly kept pace, finally feeling the cold air fill your lungs.

You finally had the opportunity to take in more details of your comrades. The three were nearly indistinguishable from behind, all in the same standard-issue winter armour and gear built for this type of climate. However, Ghost clearly stood about half a head taller than the other two, striding through the snow in steps that counted for two of yours. Gaz bounced along, only tailed by Soap, who seemed entirely unfazed by the extra weight. Showoff.

“Sergeant.” Ghost barked, jolting you to attention.

Raising your gaze once again, you caught Soap as he shrugged off your extra pack in one fell swoop, holding it limply toward Ghost. Sometimes, it was hard to tell if Ghost was mad; his resting demeanour seemed agitated. In this case, he was pissed off. That much was written in stone. The way he turned and locked his gaze on you, it sucked heat out of your face. Closing the distance between you two in only a few steps, his immense height blocked out the sun as he stood the closest to you since you started rucking before the sun was even up. Looking up at him through snow-covered eyelashes, he flicked his arm, flinging your sack into your chest, knocking the wind from your lips.

“Toughen up.”

For the remaining distance, you put your heart and soul into keeping pace, refusing to allow yourself to consider slowing down and risking the wrath of the Lieutenant. At this point, you were running on the fumes of shame and sheer willpower.

It took the remaining strength you had not to drop and lay on the floor like a starfish. Alas, once again, appearances take priority as you tried to go for that smug nothing hurts me disposition despite the situation on the hike. Pushing closed your quarters' door, you finally shuck off the remaining thermal layers after returning your body armour and pack bashfully to Ghost in the makeshift armoury. Peeling off the second pair of pants, you lay on the cot, overworked muscles radiating heat, thighs scorching to the touch.

Rifling through your bag for a fresh edition of the same standard t-shirt and pants you’ve been prescribed for years, eyes caught the white envelope Laswell handed you yesterday. You clumsily ripped the seal, unfurling a new SIM card, and a smile warmed your face. At least you’ll be able to make a call. It made you wonder if she knew you’d be on edge and needed a pep talk from a familiar voice. If it’s 09:00 here, it’s got to be… 22:00 in California. With luck, he’ll pick up.

On days like this, Uncle Chucky was your lifeline. A voice of reason, a bastion of wisdom, a tad bit of an alcoholic, and someone who’s been in the military since before you were conceived. Chucky is the kind of person that makes the world go round,’ but too much of him will drive you crazy. Delightfully stubborn, pleasantly infuriating, and a damn good sense of humour. The familiar phone number was an effortless dial.

“What the fuck is wrong with me? I’m usually so confident, so sure-footed, I’m so on edge, and they can tell.” Your voice was thick with irritation, picking at your fingernails with your phone pinned between your shoulder and ear.

“You said you felt on edge when you first landed in Somalia, but those nerves passed the second you started working.”

“Somalia was different. I had other specialists with me, not just soldiers.” You kick the toe of your boot on the doorframe, “not to mention other new faces with which I could blend in. This time, I'm the sole outlier.”

“That’s the thing when you get yourself in the military, my love.” An audible sigh came from his side microphone before he spoke again. “The big fish picked on the little fish. Eventually, you survive getting pecked at long enough to chirp at the people below you.”

“It’s fucking gross. It’s like a boys' club. I’ll never be in their circle, not really.”

“That’s it, I’m pulling the plug,” you shook as an unbecoming booming voice rose from the speaker, “Enough with the pity party. They’re testing your limits, and you’re letting them win. Get - a fucking - grip, Lua.”

Your head spun at the change of tone, enraptured by shock as his burst of agitation faded into something more patient.

“Baby love, I know you can do this, and if you weren’t qualified, they wouldn’t have chosen you.” Chuck breathed into the mic, stifling a laugh before speaking again, “Y’know, in my final years in the Marines, whenever someone tried to puff up their feathers at me, I’d imagine them crying listening to Mr. Brightside. Works every time.”

Laughter erupted from you as your mind wrapped around the sentiment. A gentle tear streaming down Ghost’s mask as he hiccuped back tears, listening to the whimsical musings of The Killers. Calmness and confidence swirled into your chest, breathing a satisfying breath for the first time in what felt like months.

“On the Brightside, heh, I got a stupid little nickname for being a fucking moron at my first meeting… They’re calling me Salsa now. Apparently, I was slipping and fumbling, and it looked like dancing.” You smirked, nipping at the raw skin around your fingernails.

The unmistakable snort of someone inhaling their drink in laughter burst from your speakers.

“They call you Salsa?”

“Mhmm.”

“My love, Salsa is … “ he smothered a laugh.

“What?”

“Salsa is an acronym. It- it means ‘Student Aviator Lacking Situational Awareness,’ they’re fucking with you.”

A spark of shame sliced across your brow. You thought they were being sweet and endearing… giving you a cheeky nickname to welcome you to the crew. The reality was a thinly veiled malicious jab at you. They found humour in your nerves about being a lone female, surrounded by strangers, in a place where nobody would be able to find you if you disappeared. As quickly as your shame faded, a new emotion manifested: white-hot rage.

“I gotta go. I love you, Chuck, I’ll be in touch.” swallowing your bile to donate the last few moments of calmness to your precious uncle before the end call button clicked. Like that, you shrugged into your quarter-zip and tore down the hall.

They had the nerve to be in the gym as if the morning ruck you’ll feel in your bones for days was a lazy evening stroll. Something about how they carried on as best buddies, humiliating you in code while smiling to your face, made your blood boil. It made you question if Soap knew Ghost would give you an earful if he took your pack off your back.

“Y’know, that’s real fucking sweet of you,” your voice cut into the small gym. “Pretending to be nice to me.”

Stepping forward, you closed the distance as eyebrows furrowed over blue and brown eyes. They even had the nerve to look shocked, their dumbfounded faces looking like a deer in headlights. Your jaw worked before you spoke.

“Salsa… Student Aviator Lacking Situational Awareness?”

Soap huffed out a laugh, but a sharp look from Gaz extinguished his smile.

“Funny, it takes a big man to make a girl feel like shit as soon as I step into your little clubhouse. Don’t worry, I won't be here for long.” Take extra care to accentuate every syllable, resting your palms resting on your waist to avoid the possibility of you throwing a fridge at them.

“We were just being cheeky,” Gaz spoke up for the two, “didn’t mean anythin’ by it.”

“Cheeky? Picking on someone who’s burdened with having a different skillset from you. What’re you, five?” You spat back.

“We’ve all been jabbed at when we’re the new guy, we’ve all been at the butt end of some banter.”

You bit back the creeping urge to spit back that your situation is nothing like his. Of course, those two knuckleheads didn’t have the empathy to grasp the situation from your perspective. You blinked, simmering in your thoughts. Wrath, translating into a simmering rage, washed into you. Working your jaw from side to side, you ended the silence.

“Cheers.”

Before anything had time to register, you were walking down the hall toward your linen closet of a bedroom, fingernails digging into your sweaty palms. White hot rage darkened your vision, electrified by a simmering sense of self-consciousness. In an instant, you snapped out as you caught Laswell’s gaze past your furrowed brow, dissolving your demeanour, manifesting your most polite smile to shield her from any indication that everything isn’t peachy. You took the opportunity to duck into the bathroom. Despite her unique ability to follow you, you deemed it a safe option. However, you genuinely had the excuse to take a much-needed shower. A precious opportunity that you refused to let pass.

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Master List

[alovelyfox]

Chapter 13: A spark

A poof of red curly hair above the crowd is the only sight that snaps you out of your disassociation. The party was coming along nicely, a lot better than anyone would’ve thought considering the amount of people invited versus the amount here. Yet, none of them faces you recognize. But Wendy’s ecstatic about the turn out, considering how she’s been glued to the grill all day, not letting anyone leave the party without trying her new burger recipe.

“It’s halal and kosher!” She keeps declaring, making you help her hand out plates to any passersby who didn’t already have one. You don’t mind, of course. She was one of three people you even know here, with Stan on the phone in the corner while Butters is waiting in line for the bathroom.

But the entrance of Kyle was enough to pull you out of your soulless stupor, and you can’t help smiling as his eyes search for yours over the hordes of people. He makes his way over, but your grin slightly falters as you see who he has behind him.

Maria. He actually brought her, you think. She hadn’t been mentioned by Kyle since he went out with her for dinner the day you met Ike, but you had heard snippets about their relationship from the rest of the group. You did vaguely remember Stan saying she was invited to come here, and while Stan may say something then do something completely different, it was nice to know Kyle was a little more mature. Even if this was the one time you wish he hadn’t been.

He brings her over and you can’t help skim over her outfit. Very… festive. You couldn’t deny she was an extremely attractive woman, but she looked nothing like you. And if Kyle showing up with a girl your polar opposite wasn’t enough of a signal that he didn’t like you, it was hard to see what was.

“Hey, Wendy, Y/N. This is Maria, my-”

“Friend. I’m his friend,” she says, cutting him off. He gives her a sideward glance, and sighs before pressing his mouth into a thin line.

“I gotta say Wendy, this is a really cool party! I could never host so many people, but you’re making it look easy,” Maria says, giving Wendy an affectionate smile. Wendy slightly blushes at the compliment, but tries to remain a steady face as she gives a modest thank you.

They converse about such and such little more, and as much as you try to help it, your eyes wander towards Kyle. He shifts uncomfortably where he’s standing, all enthusiasm from entering the party forgotten. You wanna ask if he’s okay, but he tugs on Maria’s arm under the guise of introducing her to more people, and drags her away before you can even open your mouth.

Wendy flips a couple patties then turns her attention towards you.

“You alright?” She asks in a soothing tone.

“Of course I am, why wouldn’t I be?”

“Okayy,” she says, averting her gaze back to the grill. “It’s just that, I know you have feelings for Kyle, and he just kinda showed up with another girl. So I thought-”

“Maria said they were just friends, so I’m not too worried,” you reply, and Wendy gives you some serious side eye but smiles and nods. You excuse yourself to get a drink and try to collect your thoughts.

There was no fucking way that Maria and Kyle were just friends. How they walked into the party holding hands, how comfortable Kyle was touching her, the way she barely resisted when he grabbed her arm and pulled her away. Fuck. But she said they were just friends, and you would rather believe that lie than face the truth, that the chances of you and Kyle getting together were getting slimmer and slimmer.

You grab a beer and let the liquid flow down your throat, trying to numb the ache in your heart. It works, while making the dance floor look more and more attractive. You gulp the rest of the bottle and set it on the table before making your way to the heart of the party as it blazes around you.

You have never been one for dancing, but the nervousness loosens as the bass pumps through your bones, making you dull to your surroundings. Yet you still feel the piercing green stare of a certain red-head watching you through the crowds, his eyes not leaving your body for a second as he intently watches you glide across the dance floor. Maria’s sitting beside him, looking bored and ready for a distraction, yet none comes as her ‘friend’ can’t tear his gaze away from you.

…

The party carries on, with you trying your best to avoid Kyle. The way he was watching you out there an hour ago ignites all your five senses, and you’d much rather ignore him than figure out what it meant. However, the universe decides it wants a little entertainment, and when you go to sit down and take a break from dancing, you find yourself sitting next to an inattentive Maria.

Shit.

“Maria, hi!” You open the conversation with, as not saying anything feels rude considering she’s done nothing wrong other than date your potential future husband.

“Oh, Y/N! Hey, I’ve heard so much about you from Kyle, sorry we didn’t get much of a chance to talk when he introduced us,” she exclaims, and you try not to let the fact that he talks about you to his girlfriend get your hopes up.

“Oh yeah, he mentions you all the time as well,” you lie, and a look of sadness sweeps across her face.

“He does? Oh…. You know, he told me you two work together at the law firm. I always thought lawyers were hot, with their big briefcases and fancy suits.”

You can’t help but laugh out loud at her suggestion. “You’re thinking of corporate lawyers, we’re not that. Nah, unless you find permanent raccoon eyes and working late hours hot, I don’t know what you’d see in Kyle.”

“You’re right, I’m just using him for his body,” she replies with a wink, and you choke on some air at her sudden bluntness.

“Yeah, I mean, I guess his body is fine,” you stammer out. “But I don’t know, I really like how passionate he gets about the things he cares about, how he’s kind to everyone he meets, the respect he shows-”

You cut yourself off when you realize how weird this sounds, rattling off all the things you loved about Kyle to the girl he was sleeping with. She tilts her head slightly in confusion, then gives you a soft smile.

“Funny, those sound like the same things he said he liked about you.”

You stand up suddenly and excuse yourself, trying to avoid her gaze so she won’t see the heat steadily creeping up on your face. Making your way back onto the dance floor, you find Wendy, who Stan’s managed to pry away from the grill, and dance with her, wishing the thoughts of Kyle away.

…

The setting sun signals the end of the party, and most people drift back home. Your bladder makes the decision to retire from the floor and go upstairs to relieve yourself. You take the lock off the bathroom, something you put there to stop the entire city from flooding your toilet. Finishing up, you’re about to go back down when a ray of light hits your face from an open window. The gentle breeze flowing in causes you to rest your arm on the windowsill and simply stare out into the horizon, it’s glowing aura drawing you in. You feel almost sleepy, but rising voices from below startle you awake.

“Maria, please.”

The unmistakable sound of Kyle makes you stop breathing, and you can tell from his pleading tone that this is probably a conversation they’d like to have in private. Yet, your feet won’t drag you away, your body too curious to hear what they’re gonna say to each other. So you duck down, knees bent to be up to your chin, and listen in.

“If you have something you want to say, be direct,” Maria says, the harshness of her voice indicating that she’s disgruntled.

“It’s just… It’s annoying that you introduced yourself as my friend to everyone today. I thought inviting you here was my way of saying that I wanted to be more than that. More than ‘just friends’.”.

“Kyle, you knew that this was always meant to be a casual thing. We both planned for it to be, anyways.”

“Well, plans change. My feelings have changed, at least, I don’t want to be just a casual thing anymore.”

She scoffs, and her next words come out in such a humorous voice she sounds like she’s saying a joke.

“Have your feelings for that Y/N girl changed?”

You slightly gasp at the sudden mention of your name, then clamp your hand over your mouth to avoid making any further sound. Kyle’s silence to Maria’s question causes her to continue.

“God, I was around you guys not even a full day, yet even I can see there’s something between the two of you, whether you wanna admit it or not. And no matter how hard you try to force a relationship between us, in reality all you’ll ever really want is ‘something casual’ until you can have something more serious with her.”

All three of you are silent for a moment, then Kyle mutters something you can barely make out.

“It’s not like that.”

Maria sighs, and you can hear the disappointment in her voice.

“I’m gonna go. Thank you for everything Kyle, truly. But delete my number from your phone, and fucking ask that poor girl out already.”

You make out her softly walking away and Kyle crumbling to the floor, the image of what his anguished face must look like embedded into your mind, despite how you can’t even see him from where you’re sitting. It causes your body to jump into action as you rush out of the bathroom and fly down the stairs, desperately searching for Wendy. You find her dancing with Stan, her arms lovingly wrapped around his neck as his own cradles her waist. You pause, wondering if it’s the best idea to interrupt this tender moment with your own worries, but Stan’s hands start to travel down to Wendy’s ass and you decide to separate the two before the dance floor turns into an orgy.

Disregarding Stan’s cries of annoyance, you grab Wendy’s hand and drag her inside.

“What the fuck is going on?” She asks, obviously sensing your panicked manner.

You let it all pour out of you, all of what you heard during your sneaky eavesdropping on Kyle and Maria. You feel ashamed that you were privy to one of your best friends' most private moments, but when you finish the retelling, Wendy has an excited look on her face.

“Y/N. This is it. This is your opportunity.”

The confused look on your face urges her to grab you by the hands and pull you back outside, a couple feet away from where Kyle is sitting with his head tucked between his knees and his hands on the back of his neck. The air around him reeks of dejection, but Wendy doesn’t seem to care.

“Girl, this is your chance,” she whispers in your ear. “Tell him how you feel right now.”

You start to voice your lack of approval with what she wants you to do, but she doesn’t wanna hear it, instead pushing you towards him and subsequently running away.

You mentally wish a thousand curses on her family, then take a seat beside Kyle. His head hangs low between his slightly parted legs, so you unconsciously pat him on the back, trying to reassure him everything’s gonna be fine. He softly turns his head to the side, his eyes gradually opening until they go wide upon realizing who you are. He abruptly stands up and takes several steps back from you.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?”

You also decide to stand, and clear your throat to tell him what you know. But his expression resembles one of a deer caught in headlights, and fearing that the truth might send him running, you lie.

“Oh, I was just, uhhh… Well I noticed that you and Maria had been gone for a while, and I’d wondered where the two of you had gotten to. Or if you’d decided to leave without saying goodbye.”

He sighs, then rakes a hand through his curls.

“She left. Sorry.”

“Oh,” you say, feigning disappointment. “Well, I really liked having her.”

“That’s too bad, considering she probably won’t be around anymore.”

“Sorry,” you mutter, shifting uncomfortably on your spot.

He scoffs.

“Why? You barely knew her.”

“Kyle,” you say, giving him an indicative look. “I’m not an idiot, I know you two weren’t ‘just friends’.”.

He sighs again, before turning his eyes towards the ground.

“Well, apparently that’s all we were to her.”

You take a step towards him, and put on an encouraging smile.

“Don’t worry. You’ll find someone right for you one day.”

He looks at you through his knitted eyebrows, then takes a step towards you, closing the gap so you’re both only a foot away from one another.

“So what do I do if I already found that… someone right?”

You feel a shiver crawl up your spine from the intensity of his gaze, and gulp.

“Kyle,” you say delicately. “I know you’re hurting right now, but I don’t wanna just be some rebound girl that you use to get over the one you actually want.”

He exhales, then stares at you directly, as if he needs what he’s about to say to be engraved in your mind for all eternity.

“Don’t you get it? You’re the one I want.”

You try to turn your head and look anywhere but his pleading eyes.

“You don’t know what you’re saying,” you murmur, but he ignores your words and takes your face in his hand, then leans in closer so that his mouth is inches away from your ear.

“Y/N,” he says, whispering your name like a prayer. He looks at you head on as his gaze searches your face for any resemblance of affection, which you can’t help but give him. His pupils flicker from your eyes to your lips, and every cell in your body feels electric as you close your eyes when he leans in.

BANG! BANG BANG BANG!

Were those… fireworks? You didn’t think you and Kyle kissing would have this crazy of an impact, but upon realizing that your lips haven’t actually made contact yet, you open your eyes and look up as the sky blooms a specter of color.

Oh shit, actual fireworks .

They decorate the night sky with a symphony of flames, long enough to distract Kyle and for your mind to wrap itself around the moment. You decide to do what Wendy asks and take the opportunity, lightly kissing him on the cheek before his eyes turn back to you.

“I hope you find that someone right Kyle. I really do.”

He opens his mouth but you walk away before he can utter a single word, reveling in the adrenaline pumping through your blood.

…

Butters, Wendy, and Stan are sitting on a picnic blanket on the grass, while some blond guy wearing an orange shirt is lighting up the sky with some shitty fireworks. You stand still, uncertain as to who he is, but Kyle comes up behind you and clears up any confusion.

“KENNY?”

The name sounds familiar, and when he turns around, you immediately recognize his blue eyes and messy blond hair. This was Kenny McCormick, one of Kyle’s best friends from South Park. You had to admit however, he looked slightly different without an orange parka covering half his face.

Kyle runs to hug his estranged friend, while Stan jumps up from the blanket.

“SURPRISE!” He yells. “Didn’t I tell you I’d have a killer special guest Kyle? Well, Kenny told me he’s in town, and I thought, fuck, how cool would it be if you guys met again at MY fourth of July party? So, surprise!”

“You mean our fourth of July party,” Wendy reminds him, standing up and ushering you over to meet the esteemed guest.

“Y/N, this is Kenny. Kenny, Y/N.”

You shake his hand, getting a good look at his pierced face.

“Holy shit, I’ve always wanted a lip ring just like that!” You exclaim, and his face lights up.

“No way! Get some ice and a needle, I’ll give you one right now.”

You laugh. “Maybe another time. Right now though, I kinda need to borrow Wendy and Butters if you don’t mind?”

You notice his face drop slightly when you mention wanting to take Butters with you girls, but he agrees, saying it’ll be a good opportunity to catch up with the boys. So you drag the two inside, then give one last glance to Kyle, who meets your eyes with a fond smile. You return it along with a wink, and the blush on his face is enough to make your heart beat a little faster.

[kyleyangs-a]

TASK002: POLICE INTERVIEW

TIME: 28.06.23, MID AFTERNOON WHO: YANG, KYLE LOCATION: NIGHTREST POLICE STATION

Where were you last night, June 27th? Can anyone confirm this?

"I was at home." Alone, for once. Except his night of peace with his phone turned off came to bite him in the ass come morning. "I'm sure my neighbors can confirm it."

How do you know Azra Nadir?

"Who doesn't know her? She never shuts the fuck up," Kyle mutters, clearing his throat and realizing it probably wasn't the right thing to say given what had happened. "We slept together once. Other than that, we lived in the same town. Everyone knows everyone to some extent."

When and where did you last see her, or speak to her?

"Who the fuck remembers that?" Kyle points out, thinking that the police's line of questioning was stupid, causing him to roll his eyes. "You think I pay attention to what happens around here? I don't know, maybe at a bar or club or something. She sticks with her other rich prissy friends most of the time."

Do you know anyone at all that she did not get along with?

For once, Kyle pauses and remembers the text he'd woken up to. He didn't want to jump to conclusions, but it was a bad look. Kyle didn't want to believe that she did this. Vera's name is at the forefront of his mind, but it refuses to slip off his tongue. He had more questions right now than he had answers, and the police were the last people he'd share any information with. He clears his throat, setting his hands on the table and shaking his head. "No. Like I said, I don't keep up with all that."

[noybusiness]

I had been just beginning to wondering if I should ask about the next review but there it was; thank you so much for keeping these up!

Interesting that you talk about John in relation to the "things we do for love" remark; another comment I saw after the episode aired was about how the parallel was with Mary in SPN making a deal with Azazel to let him see Sam in exchange for bringing John back to life.

Like I said, the sexual assault parallel to possession is even more clear when discussion Mary's possession.

And with the Akrida stingers, there's a physical assault involved that leaves a mark.

It's a valid choice either way, but I'm glad Rockin' Roxy chose to remember the truth, 'cause that's what I would do. Too bad Roxy never got to help them confront the Akrida Queen like she says here. I guess it's related to The Winchesters not getting more episodes in the back half like they'd planned.

Also love the matter-of-fact non-judgemental way it's established that she had a girlfriend. Despite being set in the '70s, The Winchesters is much better about inclusion than SPN. Which given that Jensen is a producer and has talked about this, I think puts paid to any conspiracy theories about him being responsible for homophobic undertones in the original show.

If Jack Wilcox's plan had gone ahead, John's body would be talking in that awful attempt at a Southern accent. Shudder. (I'm very much from the North, but I could tell that was fake.) Though I do kind of morbidly wish someone would write a fic where it had worked.

Do we think Kyle was already possessed by the Akrida when he first appeared or that they did it because of his connection to Mary? I tend to think the latter.

Would have been nice to see more of Tony and Anton if the show had been renewed. Maybe see one of Lata and Tony's dream dates get interrupted like her meditation in a previous episode and her being cranky about it.

I suppose if John and Mary had known more about golems they might have tried to track down whom it really belonged with, if that person was still alive or had surviving family.

John and Mary need to work on their poker faces if they're going to stay in this business.

The Akrida possessing Kyle not feeling anything when it makes Kyle stab himself is a bit inconsistent with the one in the trunk in "Reflections" having been successfully tortured by Samuel for information. I suppose the latter could have been pretending to feel pain to lure Samuel into a trap, but the episode in question never established that.

I first saw Charles Shaughnessy, the actor playing Jack Wilcox, when I was a kid, as the titular vampire in the Disney movie Mom's Got a Date with a Vampire, starring Caroline Rhea, who was also Aunt Hilda in Sabrina the Teenage Witch, which Mom and I were big fans of at the time. He's also been Victor Cassadine in General Hospital recently, which I fast forward through for certain plotlines (I really liked its spinoff Port Charles back in the day, because it was a supernatural soap opera along the lines of Dark Shadows, which I always enjoyed in re-runs as a kid).

Mary and John hating being left to research is funny af to me.

That reminds me of a stand-out scene in the previous episode: "I did not expect something called hunting to involve so much reading." Millie and John, as we see in Buffy and Angel, 90% of slaying is research. So you better get used to it.

I also really want to see what's in John's file. It's a bit odd that they make him sound like such a delinquent when Betty was dating him and presumably working towards a career in the police at the same time. And don't really specify what he did. Fights? Vandalism and destruction of property? Surely not breaking and entering or theft?

Wonder if Jack Wilcox defected to the Brits in SPN?

Come to think of it, we have to wonder in general what happened to him and Dorothea and his plan in the SPN timeline. Although if it's the specific SPNWIN dimension the Akrida like to target before anywhere else, then Dorothea would likely not have become comatose. And if "poking around in their business" meant using Akrida in his experiments on humans, did they ever get bad enough for him to be booted from the MOL in that timeline?

This might be the most clear indication of who Carlos was before the Winchesters, the version Samuel was mentioning when talking about them a few ep ago. The lone wolf version, the impulsive one, the not getting close to ppl one. Im very happy they've changed, i think they're happier like this.

I definitely think Carlos would agree, with their references to the others being their family and "I'll miss us" they've been the most explicit about it out of the four. It would have been nice to get more of that from all four of them if the show had continued.

Ep 10... oh boy theres a lot to say with this one.

We begin with a nice twist. The woman needing help is Akrida and the victim is the other woman who's stopped to help. Since I've recently been reminded of it, this set up instantly made me think of Sam.meeting Cole for the 1st time, but in that the one flatlined actually needed help.

The Akrida committed to the acting I see.

God the actresses did such a good job raising the tension

LOVE seeing Millie do more handywork around. We dont have nearly enough of her getting into machinery

Mary and John hating being left to research is funny af to me.

Congrats Mary for getting into college and I like that John is actually happy for her, even ribbing her a bit. Love that dynamic actualy.

"Normal life will have to wait another day" thay cut deep fellas ngl. Mainly because i would argue its exactly what Sam and Dean told themselves to put off actually getting to do anything they wanted. And we have this exact sentiment echoed 5 min later by Carlos for why they need to break up with Anton (cant afford to with the fate of the world on their shoulders). The fact that both of these are accompanied by Dean's monologue about hunting and happy endings? Very very relevant to Dean and the life he led. But more importantly, the "how far will I go to get it" echoes back a few.more things amd makes it almost ominous. We'll come back to this when we meet Mr Sheffield (i dont remmeber the characters name rn, will use it later when they say it) since the dark meaning to Dean's words is highlighted by his story.

This might be the most clear indication of who Carlos was before the Winchesters, the version Samuel was mentioning when talking about them a few ep ago. The lone wolf version, the impulsive one, the not getting close to ppl one. Im very happy they've changed, i think they're happier like this.

Oh noooo, I forgot we have Roxy here 🥲 this'll hurt.

John and Mary see a tea set and alphabetized books out: now thats truly disturbing behaviour

John and Mary any other time: eh, thats normal

I live for the chaotic pair these 2 make together

Why tf does he still have the key if they threw him.out of the MOL? Then again, considering the many issues with the MOL, this is only a mildly annoying thing.

Ah yes, hunters are apes commentary, ffs what even started this bullshit feud between hunters and MOL?? It was there on Samuel's side too, and we even see Henry go with that particular opinion...

Sooo, either Jack was really the one experimenting on monsters or that actually was Hobbes' job, regardless we know what that turned into - not just the various bodyguards that our scooby gang has encoutered thus far, but the more insidious uses too like the monsters Cuthbert Sinclaire reprogramms or the manipulation of Mrs Butters or even Mary's own brainwashing. Safe to say all this send my mind to Naomi and how heaven has a very similar approach to keeping their angels in check. Fitting then that it's the Winchester side of the family that is MOL legacy with the Campbell side being the hunters family qho tends to go for a more straightforward will just eliminate the threat vibe (more hell aligned u could say). "A lobotomy makes most monsters subservient *wink*" he says and I cannot not be filled with revulsion on multiple layers. Including the actual issue with lobotomies generally and how their extended "use" was due to a fraud profitting off of people... yeaaaa all the red flags with Jack/Porter here. But also in general it goes back to the type of MOL we have in SPN, the exact kind that JAck/Porter is are the ones still alive, who have very little actual care of who they harm in their scientific pursuit.

Clear alarm bells sounding when askes about Henry, he has a very clear tell.

Hint hint nudge nudge about Jack/Porters lack of family

You know the thing that actually annoys me about people like Jack/Porter? The fact that if he'd applied his knowledge to actually get ppl depossessed he could've actually done something helpful, that would save ppl, but nope, instead he focused everything into his fixation and inability of letting go. To everyones detriment.

Well, Roxy's motel room reminds me of several times we've seen Dean in similar places... especially after the Mark got bad.

Roxy breaks my heart. Everytime.

And we have another instance of possession being portrayed as the violation it actually is. SPN had a few moments of showing this, most notably with Sam and Lucifer, but we've rarely had such an indepth showing of exactly how someone no longer possessed is coping. The only other ones I can remember clearly delving into are Jeffrey in s7 and Nick in s14, but in both those cases, Jeffrey and Nick were more akin toa depiction of Stockholm Syndrome or at the very least a dependence had been created having been possessed so long. Which is in itself a bit problematic a message to send tbh, but Roxy meanwhile is the opposite. Not only does she not want the Akrida back, she actively is trying to deny it ever having happened initially and she def doesnt want to be reminded of it.

Ironic that it's Carlos who says the forgetting isnt working for Roxy... considering

I also adore the parallel made between Jack/Porter and Lata in this episode? Like they both have that scientific curiosity that can become really dangerous (as seen with Jack) but unlike Jack, Lata actually wants to help people so she uses what she knows (just as much a type of brainwashing technique as Jack/Porters lobotomy fyi) to offer someone help. But! Lata asks for Roxy's consent and is upfront, where Jack/Porter is lying and manipulating and taking foe himself.

Mary's instant red flag reading of Jack/Porter for the win, but she should've listened to her instincts faster. She believes next to nothing of his words. I love her so much.

I love the round table Arkida scene... its so much fun to watch. Ironic that the Akrida call hunters pests... also yay Dean!

The fact that Jack/Porter is so so pissed off is his own downfall tbh. The bitter comments fucked up his facade.

Tonyyyyy yessss. Also Lata and Tony yaaay

I love how absolutely huge gossip queens both Lata and Carlos are.

I also love Carlos' little notepad during the scene with Roxy.

The description of her possession is way to visceral fuck I fogot how hard to watch this was. And how much it echoes to asault. Not even echoes tbh considering we have a clearer scene relating to sexual assault when Jack/Porter tries to have Dorothea possess Mary so thw comparison of possession to assault is very much there this episode.

Wonder if Jack Wilcox defected to the Brits in SPN? And began what would later be Lady Bevell's expertise? The fact that he even put on a British accent def is meant to remind us of Bevell and the Brits.

God Mary and John are obvious af that they suspect shit ... ffs kids!

Carlos continues to be the one that actually uncovers key info.

Aww, Carlos and Lata are so so kind and comforting with Roxy. I love them so much.

Im so proud of Roxy, but what I genuinely love about how the ep was written is that even if she'd have gone along with the erasing of her memory, it still would've been a valid way for her to move on. Like this it obviously works two fold in somewhat convincing Carlos they also should take a leap of faith that alls gonna be well with Anton, but its set up in such a way that regardless of Roxy's choice at the end, Roxy's own wellbeing was all that mattered however that looked. I can appreciate the nareative not ramming a specific interpretation down our throats.

Ah, yes, wartime decisions excusing the means... it nearly never actually applies tho, Jack. Tho I will say it's very satisfying having it be said to John who in SPN would use this exact rethoric for a while slew of shitty choices.

Now I wont get into the whole issue with the golem being used in this ep and specifically how they kill the golem - others have said far more better informed stuff on it (shoutout to @endofthebookpod fantastic episode discussion) and I do have a plethora of issues with it - what I do wanna say on the subject tho is that at leasr insofar as Jack is concerned it makes sense that he'd steal and use a golem for his own benefit (similar to how the nazi did in 8x13). The actual problem with this is how the writers chose to tackle dealing with the golem here. Because ultimately the golem is used as a weapon by Jack, just as all his lobotomised monsters were. But the ep chosing to not clarify a few things and deciding to burn the golem??? Not good fellas, not fucking good at all.

I do appreciate John's resilience in fighting the golem tho.

Like I said, the sexual assault parallel to possession is even more clear when discussion Mary's possession.

Gruesome death for Jack tho, I will say.

"Things we do for love"?!?! John Winchester I will murder you! If Mary doesnt do it first for u even suggesting that. I do apprwciate still seeing glimpses of SPN!John even now, 10 ep into it. Because for all that people can change, its very very hard to do so and its a slow process.

Thank you Mary for shutting it down immediately. High hopes that this low key promise they made here spells good things for their future. I do hope.

I also love that Lata explains why Roxy wanting to erase her traumatic memories isnt the same as Carlos avoiding dealing with his intimacy issues. But I also love that Carlos feels safe actually confiding in Lata, for all that they banter and shit talk they're each others person.

Perfect timing on the Tragic Haircut lady. Also yea, it def is a tragic haircut.

Noooo, Akrida!Kyle is here. Using Johns past against him is smart but also i need to read that file.

I will say, I never read Millie at the end as believing that John did anything like Ive seen in a couple of other places mentioned. I just saw it as her being a. Shocked about a dead body b. Shocked about John holding a dead body and c. The police being on her heels with john holding a dead body.

But that's all for today folks. Next up, ep 11. Slowly but surely making it through the show.