#you put the spare change meme in my head

[boredth]

More oni johnny... cough cough... rattles my cup of coins...

[hminnj]

Unckuna/reader (he's very dear to my heart), mostly uncle nephew banter tbh, i needa get dividers lowkey, very short lil drabble

-

Sukuna thinks he's lost his mind.

He means it figuratively, obviously. But at this point he's sure he should've physically lost it already.

His nephew- of which he is currently babysitting- is currently on his couch, not a care in the world, half empty family sized bag of chips that was unopened not too long ago (fatface), kicking his feet like an adolescent boy in love, greasy fingers on the remote, and scrolling through youtube shorts on the tv???

Oh and worst of all he forgot to mention, the brat is wearing shoes.

The fact that he's even related to this thing makes him want to kill everyone else in the room and then himself.

"Itadori Yuji..." Sukuna seethes, it takes everything in him to not rip the brat's skeleton right out of his skin. He thinks it would be easy, if only a certain three people would let him (a shame, truly).

Yuji spares him a glance (the disrespect).

"Oh whats up unc"

"And what do you think you're doing?" The older of the two walks over and blocks the view of the tv, glaring down with his hands on his hips.

Yuji stares for a moment before opening his stupid food hole (as Sukuna describes it), "Have you ever seen that one meme, no one looks good from below? Well you're the version where they-"

Sukuna promptly picks him up by his foot, shaking him as a few chip bits fall off Yuji's shirt, "I literally just cleaned the house you freeloading fiend. Have you seen what a mess you've made?"

"You clean the house everyday you freak. Now put me down! I swear I was gonna clean up afterwards anyways." Yuji attempts to wiggle his way out of Sukuna's grip, he gets nowhere (predictably).

"Brat. You don't even know where the vacuum is, were you planning on picking them up one by one?"

"Ugh you're such a housewife, if I didn't know any better I'd assume you- MMM"

The sound of the code being put into the front door quickly stops Sukuna who shoves his free hand into Yuji's face, effectively shutting him up as well.

Sukuna grins when he sees you walk in, holding Yuji as if he were a first place catch for the annual bass fishing competition.

The sight makes you pause and contemplate your life decisions.

"Sukuna... put Yuji down, all the blood's rushing to his head."

Yuji is dropped immediately.

"OWWWWWWWW"

Your eyes trail around the living space and then back to the two children, "Does someone want to explain what's happening? And why there are shoe tracks in my house?" You make eye contact with your husband (who practically regresses 15 years in age when your nephew is around), he looks at you then uses his middle finger to point at Yuji.

Said boy, still recovering on the floor, whines, "Mann why can't I have a cool wine aunt and normal uncle?"

"Yuji if I were a wine aunt I wouldn't even be your aunt. Now are you gonna clean up this mess or should I make you?"

"On it! Whatever you say ma'am!" Yuji scrambles away after saluting and then pops back up from the hallway, realizing something crucial.

"Where are the cleaning supplies again?"

You sigh.

.

Yuji's finished with cleaning when he joins (intrudes, in Sukuna's words) you and his uncle on the couch, another episode of criminal minds running in the background.

You've changed from your work clothes into something more comfortable, snuggled into Sukuna's side as you start, "You know, if Spencer existed in real life I'd consider leaving you for him."

The tattooed man can only cringe in disgust at your behavior, "We're literally married, woman. You would leave me for that??"

He gives you and the tv an incredulous look. You can only giggle at his reaction, "You're like a child sometimes." His disapproval worsens, and you consider continuing to tease him but go with your better judgement (before he decides not to cook dinner, even though he always does anyways).

"I'm sorry hubby, forgive me?" Sukuna scoffs but accepts the affection anyways, he always does.

Yuji's voice interrupts the moment, "Ew you guys are so nasty (his parents are way worse), but speaking of children... when am I gonna get a cousin?"

The young boy can only watch as you two glance at each other then back at him, casually dropping an "Oh, Soon" then moving on completely. It takes him a second to process.

"WHAT."

-

unckuna my love

reblogs & comments are greatly appreciated :]

thank you for reading, have a blessed week

not fully proofread or edited

[tf-boi]

Game Over

(Here's a story from one of the polls I made a while back. I hope you enjoy ;) The premise is me and my boyfriend keeps getting cock blocked by his little brother but tonight I get my revenge.)

"Mmmmm mmmmm" moaned Raymond making out with his boyfriend Sean. As they undress eachother their cocks became erect and rubbed against eachother.

Sean pulled off Raymonds underwear and released his musk into the room. With much anticipation he moves in on his meal. Suddenly a scream is heard.

"GODDAMMIT!!" Shouted Tony, Sean's brother, from across the hall. Raymond and Sean paused, kocked back into reality. They grinned and resummed. But as Sean began sucking Raymond off another scream echo'd. "MOTHER FUCKER!!"

Tony has been on a losing streak on his online game and nightly his loud screams would interupt Raymond and Sean's fun. The pair took another look at eachother when suddenly another scream was heard. "You guys suck!"

"Forget it! Moods killed . . ." Sean said tossing his hands in the air.

Raymond rolled his eyes "He's been like this NIGHTLY for a whole month. I'm gonna. . ."

Before Raymond could finish his thought Sean put his finger on his mouth. "Its okay Ray Ray, he'll probably fall asleep soon. . . We'll try again then."

"Uggghhhhh. . . But I'm already turned off by his screams."

"Damn. . . Guess we'll try again tomorrow. . ."

Raymond lied in bed annoyed. He wanted to get back at Tony for cock blocking him these passed few weeks. As Sean got up to go into the shower, Raymond saw that Sean was taking his phone with him. He then hatched a scheme knowing that his boyfriend is gonna be in there for at least an hour, when Sean takes his phone in he spends most of the time watching videos and laughing at memes so he had plenty of time.

As soon as Sean closed the door Raymond quietly got up and walked into the hallway in the nude. He approached Tony's room with a spare key they had incase of emergencies and unlocked his door. Raymobd peeked in and saw Tony shouting at his screen with his noise-canceling headphones on. "Perfect he can't hear me. . .little brat" he thought as he approached his prey. As he got behind Tony he realized he was playing naked, his computer and several screens heating up the room causing him to be too hot and stripped down. Raymond almost drooled as he grabs Tony all of a sudden. Tony's focus on his game was his downfall as Raymond rippes him from his chair and bent him over his bed.

"What the fu-" Tony tried to scream however Raymond covered Tony's mouth with his hands. Raymond pulls out Tony's 'lucky' butt plug from his ass and shoves his cock in. Tony tried to scream put Raymond put his hand over gis throat turning them hollow. Tony was confused as his body began to warm up with a lustful sensation. He stopped struggling as he fell to his bed almost succumbing to his fate, drooling as his mind goes blank. Raymond began focusing on the shape he wanted as Tony's limbs began to shrink and sink into him. His neck expanding as what looked like forskin surrounds his head. His body going from a flat human body to a thick round shaft. Raymond grabbed a pair of Tony's underwear and sniffed it as his victim slowly shrinks. Veins appearing as he throbbed. Soon Tony took his final shape as a thick juicy cock, Raymonds normal pubic hair changing to the light purple color of Tony's hair.

"Thats what you get for cock blocking bitch!" Raymond exclaimed in joy. He rubbed his new cock admiring his work. "Oh looks like you added a whole 6 inches! Thanks a lot bro!" Raymond began to jack off moaning in joy having to hold in his load nightly. Days of having to fuck various coworkers and clients in the office bathroom are now coming to an end. His jerking off was cut short as he heard an annoyed voice. "Ahem . . . What do we have here?" An annoyed Sean came into Tony's room. "B-babe?! You're done fast!" Raymond stuttered.

"I was out of shampoo so I just rinsed my body off" Sean said tapping his foot "I said not to do anything. What the hell man".

"Well. . . I was mad and couldn't think straight. Besides his mind is blanked out for at least another hour. So we can finally fuck in peace."

Sean raised an eyebrow.

Raymond got on Tony's bed and spread his legs, Tony's dick body presented in all its glory. "You know you want us . . ." Raymond said full of lust.

Sean rolled his eyes. "Sure but as punishment I'm gonna do all the work. . . You have to stay still".

"Fine. . ." Raymond sighed. He wasn't opposed to having Sean do all the work but now he can't go all out like he wanted.

"Now lie perfectly still love" Sean said suggestively.

Raymond lied down with Tony fully erect, his partially conscious mind throbbing at the sight of his older brother. Sean opened his mouth and stuffed his face with Raymond's giant cock. "MMmmm MMmmmm" Sean moaned as he envelope's his former brother with his mouth. "God he tastes so good~!" Sean thought. He sensed Raymond's legs trying to wrap around him, but he raised his finger and wagged it side to side, telling him, 'No you are just my sex slave today, no moving'. Sean continued to deep throat the massive rocket before him as he also gave Raymond a hand job. "Slurp slurp, gulp" Sean moaned as he sucked in all of Raymond's precum. "Uhhh uhhhh . . ." Raymond felt his tip being licked so that Sean can taste his new cock, even feeling the tip enter his shaft a bit. Raymond gripped the bed as Sean continued to go down on him. Sean's lips tighten around Raymond's dick as he moved his head back and forth, until he slid Tony's cock body out of his mouth.

Sean enjoyed his boyfriend's new cock in his mouth long enough. He turned around and shoved Raymond's dick into his ass and started riding him reverse cowgirl style. Raymond gripped Tony's bed and curled his toes as his boyfriend pounds his new dick full force with his plump bottom ass. "F-faster faster!" Raymond shouted as Sean tightened his ass cheeks and bounced up and down his former brother like a thick dildo. As Sean kept riding he felt himself fall over all of a sudden as Raymond couldn't hold back any longer. He got up and started fucking his boyfriend like a wild beast. "Uhhh uhhhh .. . no fair!" Sean moaned into the bed "But keep going!!!" He screamed as his ass gets destroyed by his boyfriend's new cock, underestimating how much length and girth his brother's body added to it when Raymond absorbed him. Raymond pounded Sean's ass faster and harder as the pair moaned. In the corner of Raymond's eyes he saw a pile of clothes Tony took off when he striped down. Raymond grabbed a sock and stuffed into Sean's mouth. Sean moaned as his ass gets destroyed with his brother's sock in him. The taste fill his mouth as the salty sweet feeling fills his mouth, with a hot mess filling his ass. Raymond grabbed Tony's underwear and gave it a big whiff as he fucked Sean. Sean cums multiple times, soaking Tony's bed with his seamen, however Raymond didn't care that his boyfriend finished, he kept fucking him until Raymond came 3 more times. After pounding his boyfriend for what felt like an hour, Raymond bent over his boyfriend and grabbed him as he released his load into Sean's ass. Gallons of cum fills his boyfriend's ass and expands his stomach. The pair kept cumming until they fall over and embrace. The two kiss and Sean looks at Raymond's now limp cock, cum still dripping out. "Looks like my little bro made a mess in me~" Sean said rubbing his stomach. The amount of cum in him made him look pregnant. "Yeah, I'm glad he was cock blocking us for so long, that release was amazing!" Raymond said stroking his cock.

All of a sudden Raymond's dick started moving a bit on his own.

"Uh oh, looks like Tony woke up babe!" Raymond snickered.

Sean bent over and gave Tony a little kiss on the tip. "Sorry little bro, your new body is amazing so you are gonna stay like that! At least until you made up for all the times you cock blocked us!"

Sean and Raymond snickered as they prepare for round two.

Tony stayed as Raymond's dick for several weeks where the pair fucked several times a day.

[jamsmemes]

(     *     INTERSTELLAR PROMPTS   !    

a self indulgent meme based on interstellar (part 2). feel free to change pronouns / details as needed  !

❛ we've got each other. ❜

❛ look at that perfect planet. we're not gonna find another one like her. ❜

❛ is a tiger evil because it rips a gazelle to pieces? ❜

❛ this crew represents the best aspects of humanity. ❜

❛ don't stay up too late. ❜

❛ we can't spare the resources. ❜

❛ i've been waiting a long time to be up here. ❜

❛ you are literally wasting your breath. ❜

❛ why are you whispering? ❜

❛ everything wants us dead. we're just not supposed to be here. ❜

❛ we're explorers, on the greatest ocean of all. ❜

❛ so we've got a pretty good idea what we're gonna find on the other side? ❜

❛ say it, don't spray it. ❜

❛ who put it here? who do we thank? ❜

❛ any trick to this? ❜

❛ the others made it, right? ❜

❛ thanks for the confidence boost. ❜

❛ they won't help you in here. ❜

❛ all we can do is record and observe. ❜

❛ that's easy for you to say. ❜

❛ you don't have anyone back on earth waiting for you, do you? ❜

❛ you have no idea what's easy for me. ❜

❛ going down there is going to cost us. ❜

❛ you don't find that every day. ❜

❛ no time for monkey business down there. ❜

❛ don't worry, i wouldn't leave you behind. ❜

❛ a literal heart of darkness... ❜

❛ don't say much, do you? ❜

❛ the answer's there, just no way to see it. ❜

❛ wanna get in fast, don't we? ❜

❛ hands where i can see them! ❜

❛ what're you waiting for? go! ❜

❛ those aren't mountains... they're waves. ❜

❛ you don't have time! ❜

❛ get back here! now! ❜

❛ i told you to leave me. ❜

❛ difference is, only one of us was thinking about the mission. ❜

❛ i was trying to do the right thing! ❜

❛ whats this gonna cost us? ❜

❛ we're not prepared for this. ❜

❛ you're a bunch of eggheads with the survival skills of a boy-scout troop. ❜

❛ we're stuck here till there won't be anyone left on earth to save. ❜

❛ don't just shake your head at me! ❜

❛ time is relative — it can stretch and it can squeeze — but it can't run backwards. ❜

❛ could they be talking to us from the future? ❜

❛ i'm sorry. i screwed up. ❜

❛ i wasn't much of a parent, but i understood the most important thing — let your kids feel safe. ❜

❛ i've waited years. ❜

❛ i thought i was prepared. ❜

❛ there's nothing here for us. ❜

❛ why didn't you sleep? ❜

❛ i stopped believing you were coming back. ❜

❛ something seems wrong about dreaming your life away. ❜

❛ we've been receiving, but nothing gets out. ❜

❛ just start at the beginning. ❜

❛ i've got a surprise for you. ❜

❛ you're not listening to this. i know that. ❜

❛ you're gone. you're never coming back. and i've known that for a long time. ❜

❛ it'd be a real good time for you to come back. ❜

❛ i didn't mean to intrude. ❜

❛ i've never seen you in here before. ❜

❛ i've never been in here before. ❜

❛ i just had something i wanted to get out. ❜

❛ i know they're still out there. ❜

❛ i'm not afraid of death. i'm afraid of time. ❜

❛ are you calling my life's work nonsense? ❜

❛ love isn't something we invented — it's observable, powerful. why shouldn't it mean something? ❜

❛ love is the one thing we’re capable of perceiving that transcends dimensions of time and space. maybe we should trust that, even if we can’t yet understand it. ❜

❛ if you're wrong, you'll have a very personal decision to make. ❜

❛ you might have to decide between seeing your children again and the future of the human race. ❜

❛ all these years... all these people counted on me. i let you all down. ❜

❛ i'll finish what you started. ❜

❛ you left us here. to die. ❜

❛ pray you never learn just how good it can be to see another face. ❜

❛ you have literally raised me from the dead. ❜

❛ with our situation, there's not much hope of any other rescue. ❜

❛ tell us about your world. ❜

❛ some things aren't meant to be known. ❜

❛ we can care deeply, selflessly for people we know, but our empathy rarely extends beyond our line of sight. ❜

❛ we are the future. ❜

❛ i'm still trying to solve this. ❜

❛ you'd do this for us? ❜

❛ a trip into the unknown requires improvisation. ❜

❛ at the very moment of death, your mind pushes a little harder to survive. ❜

❛ none of this turned out the way it was supposed to. ❜

❛ i'm sorry — i can't let you leave. ❜

❛ you fucking coward. ❜

❛ you're gonna save the human race? really? how? ❜

❛ take your stuff and go. ❜

❛ don't — you'll kill us both. ❜

❛ please don't judge me — you were never tested like i was. ❜

❛ that survival instinct — that's what drove me. ❜

❛ you're feeling it, aren't you? ❜

❛ i'm sorry, i can't watch you go through this — i thought i could. ❜

❛ i'm still here. i'm here for you. ❜

❛ i'm sorry. we should've followed your instincts. ❜

❛ this is no time for caution. ❜

❛ there's good news and bad news. ❜

❛ the only way humans have ever figured out of getting somewhere is to leave something behind. ❜

❛ you have to leave something behind. ❜

❛ we don't have much time! ❜

❛ you goddamn fool. ❜

❛ everybody on earth is going to die! ❜

❛ take it slow. remember you're no spring chicken anymore. ❜

❛ you were extremely lucky. ❜

❛ nobody believed me, but i knew you'd come back. ❜

[waltwhitmansbeard]

That new ask meme is quite interesting.

Let's go with 16, Q, and fish.

꒰ 16 ꒱ strong herbal lavender ꒰ Q ꒱ a dark-red evening gown ꒰ 𓆟 ꒱ a grey sky laden with rainclouds

To live in Nicodranas is to know inclement weather. The Menagerie Coast is used to all manner of batterings from the sea, from annoying squalls to terrifying typhoons. Tonight, the storm is a threat, a big cat tensed to pounce, its only herald a thick, dense blanket of gray-black clouds that has settled over the otherwise colorful city like smoke—and, of course, the thunder.

In this city, in a bedroom exploding with art and crammed corner to corner with all kinds of soft, snuggly things, is a little girl. She's in her favorite nightgown, pink with bright yellow bows, but even that small comfort can't keep the terror at bay. The big cat's rumbles are getting louder as the world gets darker, and Jester clutches her stuffed unicorn closer to her chest.

"It's just thunder," Jester whispers to herself, eyes squeezed shut. "You've heard Bluud growl bigger than this. Don't be silly."

Just then, there is an enormous, echoing crack!—and for a moment, the whole world goes white. Jester screeches and buries herself beneath her blankets, unable to stop the frightened tears from coming.

The blood is pounding in her ears, so she doesn't hear the small creak of her bedroom door opening. When a hand touches her head from the other side of the blanket, she screams and thrashes. "NO—MONSTER—"

"Be still, little sapphire! It's only me!"

It takes Jester a minute to untangle herself, but when she does, she sees her mother perched on the edge of the bed. Even in this low light, she is glittering, a real ruby come to life in a shimmering dark red gown. Trembling as she is, Jester can't help but wonder if she'll be even half as pretty as her mother someday.

"Mama." Jester scrambles to curl up in her mother's lap, careful not to ruffle her pretty dress. "I'm sorry I yelled."

"Oh, no." Her mother hugs her tight, rests her chin atop Jester's nubbin horns. "Don't apologize for being afraid, my darling girl. There's no shame in fear." She kisses the top of Jester's head. "Besides, that was some scary thunder!"

Jester's eyes go wide. "You were scared, too?"

She nods solemnly. "Very. Why, I'm thinking about canceling my performance tonight!"

Jester gasps. It's so rare for a performance to be canceled. "But why?"

"Well, I was hoping I could come in and snuggle with you, brave sapphire. I don't think I'll be able to weather this storm alone."

At once, the fear melts away from Jester's body. If her mama needs to borrow some of her bravery, then she'll just have to make sure that she has extra to spare. "Of course, Mama! We can make a fort, and all of my stuffed animals can come protect us, and no storms will be allowed inside." She pauses. "Or boys."

Her mother laughs, one of Jester's favorite sounds. "What a wonderful plan. I'll go tell Bluud that tonight's plans have changed, and then I'll go put on something a bit more suitable for cuddles." She raises an eyebrow. "Do you think you can build a blanket fort in five minutes?"

Jester grins ear to ear. What is a thunderstorm in the face of such a challenge? "Absolutely."

She's pulled in for another tight hug, and Jester smells it, her favorite smell in the world: the fresh lavender her mother spritzes into her hair. Jester breathes it in, and any thoughts of storms are long forgotten. "I love you, Mama."

"I love you too, little sapphire." She kisses Jester's nose. "My brave, brave girl."

[reasonandfaithinharmony]

2023 writing gif-making round up

Rules (adapted for fic, gifs, art, etc.): Share what you made this year! It can be works you posted to Ao3, Wattpad, Tumblr, or anywhere else! You can share everything you made or just the projects you're most excited about. Thank you for the tag, @thisbuildinghasfeelings!

January

Um. Coming to terms with the idea of 2023? I dunno. But certainly nothing creative happened here.

February

Boyfriend → husband (Schitt's Creek) — A side-by-side comparison of how David refers to Patrick in season 4 and season 6. (Brought to you courtesy of a lovely text post by @jesuisici33.)

David questioning Stevie's motives (Schitt’s Creek) — A fun look at David's expressive face. 😄

March and April

An existential crisis. Or two. Or five. 🙃 Managed to finish absolutely nothing.

I did come in contact with a lot of 911 Lone Star content, however. Which explains everything that follows. Oops?

May

Marry me. (911 Lone Star) — Ah, my first gif set for this show. A parallel of TK referring to Carlos as his husband when he proposes, and then during their wedding ceremony.

Wedding → honeymoon (911 Lone Star) — Holding hands right after they first kiss as husbands. (Promo footage that didn't actually make the final episode cut). And holding hands poolside on their honeymoon.

Note: From here on out, everything in this list is for Lone Star, unless otherwise specified.

June

TK and Andrea helping Carlos get ready — A parallel set highlighting similar moments from Best of Men and a deleted scene from In Sickness and in Health

We almost forgot. Your boutonnière. — In which I attempt to put a couple pieces of unaired footage back together: the deleted scene with Andrea and Carlos + promo footage of what must be the same scene

Heart tutorial — Danielle Savre and Stefania Spampinato teach Rafael Silva how to make a heart sign with his hands at the First Responders Reunion 🫶

July

🤨 (affectionate) — Listen. I love this dynamic. Had to do the parallel set.

Nothing ever stays the same, Carlos. — A look at TK and Carlos' conversation in 2x04 in parallel with Carlos' wedding vows. The first set I wanted to do for Lone Star. Took me a while to get to it because I wasn't sure how to put it together.

August

TK needs you all to RSVP — My first attempt at this type of post. Incorrect quotes? Text post memes? I don't know what to call them, really. But it was definitely fun. And then it became the thing I did most often. Lol.

And if it never changes? // What if everything changes again? — A parallel set for me and ~5 other people, putting Tarlos in 2x04 side by side with Marcel the Shell with Shoes On

September

You're a menace to society *smooch smooch smooch* — My next incorrect quotes/meme post. And my contribution to ascribing cat-like behavior to TK.

I like him a normal amount — A fandom reaction gif, essentially. Courtesy of Joey Tribbiani on Friends.

Love is stored in humans finding out we can make heart shapes with our hands — Had to revisit the heart tutorial for Rafa. This time as one of the incorrect quotes/text posts.

When you can be silly and slutty with them — Oh, I had fun with this look at TK and Carlos' relationship. 😍

Pretty sure this happened at least once — In which we learn TK was seen trying to catch a frog outside the firehouse. Obviously.

October

Carlos is lit like an angel — Commentary on that beautiful moment from 2x02 where TK falls into Carlos' arms.

I put my emotions into my cooking. // This tastes… horny? — A playful and sexy look at Carlos in the kitchen with TK, and then heading upstairs… 😏

I adore you. Why are you like this? I’m going to kiss you with such fervor… — Oh, just exploring the Tarlos relationship dynamic with a text post and a scene from 3x18.

November

Unedited Gif Game (26 entries so far) — This has been very fun. I think it was good for me to have a bunch of low-stakes gif projects where I was not in charge. Lol. I will spare you individual links to each of them. But they should all be in the tag linked here. I will probably make this an ongoing thing, as long as it's not annoying everyone.

December

Episode vs. Promo: Yee-Haw (1x02) — Let's start diving into some more unaired footage, shall we? And let's start with some alt takes on that first make-out scene.

Missing moments: then and now — From an almost-kiss in 1x02 to an alt kiss from their wedding.

You're a miracle, TK Strand. My miracle. — A rather large close-up gif of that alt wedding kiss. Why? So we can see the teardrop that beads up under Carlos' eye.

Tags below the cut…

Tagging: @rmd-writes, @reyesstrand, @strandnreyes, @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut, @carlos-in-glasses, @lemonlyman-dotcom, @birdclowns, @welcometololaland, @lizzie-bennetdarcy, @rosedavid, @heartstringsduet, @noxsoulmate, @chicgeekgirl89, @paperstorm, @tailoredshirt, @guardian-angle22, @swearphil, @carlos-tk, @three-drink-amy, @orchidscript, @danieljradcliffe, @lightningboltreader + open tag!

[taggedmemes]

SENTENCE MEME THE WOMBATS / FIX YOURSELF, NOT THE WORLD

spare me the drone of your conversation.

spare me my lack of sophistication.

i don't wanna sit around and just get high.

i'm all dressed up.

you walk in the room and my tongue gets tied.

it's such a heavenly sight.

i just hope i don't ruin this.

i just hope i don't ruin this, getting too fucked up to remember this.

you flip me upside down.

you take me out of my head.

i'm kind of getting into it.

you pull me out of my lows.

let's see where this shit goes.

i can't recall all the things you said.

i'm feeling pretty good about the two of us.

i've got a couple secrets.

dwelling on the past just kills the vibe.

one last slide down the rabbit hole.

there's still no room in paradise.

the kids aren't wrong.

i'm looking for a spark in the heart.

you can drag the years behind you, or you can let them go.

i see a tunnel at the end of the light.

i'm always a mess come the end of the night.

i'm forever locking myself in the glass of your rearview.

if you ever leave, i'm coming with you.

you know i'll do whatever you want me to.

i'll get out of bed.

i'm your reluctant optimist.

i'm stuck to the gum that's stuck on your shoe.

am i losing you in the dark?

no more breaking stuff.

no more acting up.

you only ever catch me out.

if you ever leave me, i'm coming with you.

you can scream like a banshee and still nothing comes.

i am ready for the high.

nothing works worse than the weekend fix.

i'm ready for the high life.

a kiss without a fist fight.

a bang without the dynamite.

i always think in extremes.

i should be pulling you close to me.

maybe generation x are the chosen ones.

they've got everything they need beneath their aching thumbs.

underneath the low there's a lower part.

no hotel guaranteed.

a professional learns from all their rookie moves.

there must be some method to the madness.

just one more smile and then i'll go.

this could be a holiday or an intersection where two roads fuse.

stop. i don't need to know.

fuck my sadness.

fuck our options.

fuck the life plan.

no more worry, i've killed it with both hands.

just give me something to light the fuse.

she was dreaming of her big break.

she constructed the right attitude.

the universe has got plans.

competition can dry you up.

people don't change people, time does.

we're all trying to get better.

we've all had quite enough of this pleasant displeasure.

i'd love to help you out.

i'd love to get us off this swing, this roundabout.

today i had a big idea.

there's no room for mistakes out here.

everybody wants to be the man.

everything i love is going to die.

keep your big mouth shut.

stop wasting my time.

icarus was my best friend.

i'm going to make him proud in the end.

there's no experimenting here.

no threesomes like we talked about when we were blacking out.

what a crazy pranged out year.

we spent most of it kissing teeth.

the moment starts to pass.

i start reverting back.

sell my spine to save my neck.

i'm starting to forget.

howl into the void again.

why don't you chop my tongue out and put my insides inside a jar.

you shake me up, you shake me down.

work's easy, but life's getting hard.

you don't speak for me.

could use some peer pressure.

you're so well put together.

tell me, sugar.

is there something i need to know?

pull the trigger.

pull me back from the edge.

pull me out of my head.

she is wildfire.

i could live in here forever.

let's find a drug to fix me.

guess i'm always blinded by the emperor's new clothes.

there's always something lurking down the rabbit hole.

in the back of your mind there's a crosshair.

don't wanna cause any trouble.

don't wanna poke the bear in the zoo.

drama becomes elastic then snaps back into place.

i saw your temperament running out the gate.

don't wanna stand in your way.

i'm pretty much worried about everything.

i worry that i'm worrying so much.

i worry too much.

multiples of three keep me warm, keep me stable.

superstition's a wasp at your picnic.

i'll say it again but without feeling.

i'll get what i think if i keep on thinking.

it's not paranoia if it's really there.

i'm not sure how much milk is enough milk.

bang my head against a wall.

i let the smallest of things ruin my day.

i'm the voicemail that you coulda shoulda checked sooner.

i'm the only obstruction in the way.

i don't wanna lose myself in someone else's game.

[crochetedblorbos]

"We'll all go and be fucking wombles, aye?"

Character Name: Declan Buchanan

Fandom: @realmspod, Liminal London campaigns [Podcast]

Played By: Pip Gladwin

Yarn Used: Hair: CraftSmart Value - Taupe Skin: CraftSmart Value - Mushroom Antlers: CraftSmart Value - Coffee Shirt: CraftSmart Value - Grey Ombre Trousers/Soles: CraftSmart Value - Wine Shoes/Belt: CraftSmart Value - Dark Chocolate

Basic pattern here.

Everybody’s favorite pathetic wet cat of a man depressed alcoholic fae-cursed private investigator! While I was frantically crocheting Monty to get him ready in time to hug him when he really needed it, I was not expecting Declan to need the hugs more. Damn the shiny math rocks, but holy hell, what a way to play that. Anyway, before Series 5 drops and we find out who’s going to destroy this man first, Zack or Pip, I wanted to get him done. (And I did - with a whole four days to spare! Go me!) He varies from the basic pattern as follows:

Shoes: Hey, I remembered the different colored soles again! Declan is described as tall and thin, so like with Mini, I did another round of decrease at R7 of both shoes (sc in first 7 st, inv dec 3 times, sc in next 2 sts, join) to make his legs twelve stitches around. I then did R8 as straight stitching with the shoe color before I switched to the trousers. (The other thing I did, which I should have been doing long ago, was the round before I changed color, I did the sl st to join in the color of the next row.)

Trousers: Again, tall, thin Declan. Mostly I worked his legs the same as usual, just in rounds of twelve instead of fifteen, but I also made them longer, so they went from R9 (the hdc row for hem) to R34 before I joined them together. I only used a chain of three to connect his legs, too, giving his waist a circumference of 30 stitches as opposed to the usual 38. For the belt, I went five rows above the…well…groin, switched to the belt color, and did a round of fpdc around the round two below like I did with the hem of Joseph’s hoodie. Then I switched back to the trousers color and did a round of sc in the back loop of the fpdc and front loop of the last round of trousers. For the belt loops, every four or five stitches I inserted the hook into the row below the belt, drew up a loop, and then pulled the next stitch through both that loop and the loop already on the hook. (I was kind of pleased with that, actually.)

Shirt: Hey, kids, know what the difference between variegated, self-striping, and ombre is? Ombres go FOR-FUCKING-EVER before they change color! (: Oh, well, it worked out, I guess. I didn’t really vary him all that much here except that I just went straight up with rounds of 30 (and also made his torso a bit longer) before decreasing at the shoulders.

Head: I frogged it. Several times, actually. I wasn’t happy with my stitches and I definitely wasn’t happy with my initial color choices and I also did what I consider the worst attempt at “a sort of perpetual five o’clock shadow” in the history of crochet, and the second time I accidentally added an extra round of increases and several extra rounds in between the increases and decreases - as I put it in the official Realms of Peril & Glory Discord, “He head too big for he got damn he” (remember this meme, guys?) - but eventually I got it right. (Visit his page on my website to see rejected progress pics.) I added one (1) extra round between increase and decrease in the final version as well to give him a slightly longer face, and I think it worked. For the five o’clock shadow, I just used the hair color for part of his face in a pattern that looked and felt right to me, leaving space for the mouth. Once again, I used safety eyes; the pack I bought has basically clear eyes and a bunch of discs you can put behind them to customize the colors, so I decided to give him pink eyes like they’re bloodshot.

Hair: I tried a new technique here. For each stitch beyond the hairline, I did a two-strand puff stitch (insert hook in next st, yo, draw up loop, yo, insert hook in same st, yo, draw up loop, yo, draw through all loops on hook), and I really like the effect!

Arms: There was just enough of the next color in the ombre to make it almost all the way up both arms and I’m trying not to be annoyed about it. Anyway, I started his arms on a base of four sc instead of five, then otherwise proceeded the same way I did for Joseph and Monty’s except that I made them longer (29 rounds total, I believe).

Antlers: I can’t share the exact pattern here because it’s copyrighted, but I used the pattern for jackalope antlers in Crochet Creatures of Myth and Legend by Megan Lapp (and if you click that link, check out her other patterns - they look AMAZING and if I wasn’t already approaching PELE I would be buying some of those). Declan usually grinds them off as soon as he wakes up, so this is just-woke-up-from-a-nap-and-can’t-find-his-angle-grinder-yet Deccy Boi.

[frostfall24]

1, and 2 for whatever character you want from the question meme!

i WOULD choose asja cause she's the favourite but... well you saw how long the other post is LOL

1. What was the original thought that led to the creation of this character?

I actually originally made Orvyn for an assignment. the task was to write a short story about the battle of hastings, and i ended up using the basic idea of "knight who bonded with his horse thinks on the impending death of not only himself, but his loyal companion that had no choice to begin with". then i got DEEP into the elden ring brainrot spiral and thought about writing my own fic, and coincidentally, i had that knight oc just hanging out right there, with no other purpose...

2. How long was the process before the character reached its final version? (or a version that would be clearly recognizable as the character?)

Lowkey, I've only just become REALLY happy with him very recently. for the past two years he's always felt a bit off to me but i landed on it a few weeks ago: he's not a flawed enough person! i need my blorbos extra shitty! my morgkisser is terrible. asja isn't terrible but she's got a whole bunch of issues. orvyn was just too normal for me to properly enjoy

teeny bit of backstory: orvyn was a leyndell knight back in godfrey's time who became tarnished and was part of the Great March. he comes back uh, quite a few centuries later, but he doesn't exactly realise it yet and- horsegirl that he is- essentially goes "welp! time to head back home to my horse Eira and thank the erdtree for the second chance!" and then he experiences the world as an outsider for the first time on the way there and. oh no. everything is terrible and actually has been for a long time i talked about it a bit in asja's post but the main change i made to him is that he initially still carries the biases of the golden order for a while, HOWEVER his journey back to leyndell as an outsider rather than a respected knight begins to put things into more perspective for him. he learns about the history of the lands between in new, non order-bootlicking contexts. He gets to see the other side of the Liurnia/Leyndell war. He sees how corruption has ruined Stormveil. He sees well... Caelid 💀. But amidst it all theres also notes of familiarity that now feels wrong. The Order hasn't changed a bit, in spite of how long it's been since his first life. Stagnant. And he slowly begins to realise that it's hurting everyone, not just those that the Golden Order would call an enemy going into the shunning grounds is definitely the wakeup call moment tho. everything else he could kinda rationalise, but even his slightly racist self can recognise that yeah this... this aint it. asja helps to really hammer it in after the fact. before these changes he was kinda always against the order's wrongs from the start. originally i used to HC that omens were more accepted in society before godfrey left, BUT the introduction of the hornsent kinda threw a wrench into that. i still do think it got worse after he left, but the idea of orvyn not knowing about the shunning grounds made him look kinda stupid at best LOL. now its more like, he rationalised it. its better to keep them contained than to either let them hurt people or outright slaughtering them, right? but he never stepped foot down there. he presumed it was more like a gaol or something of that sort, where they got food and water and clothes delivered to them. not... literally just the sewers. maybe they were a bit more organised back in the day when leyndell could spare the resources and men for it, but never as humane as he'd been picturing. so yeah thats my silly horsegirl oc! he's been floating around in the brainspace for a good while now but im genuinely happy with him now. maybe i'll actually draw him one day like i do asja (who is even mypfp) who knows

[bergeronprocess]

This prompt is from The Learning Network at the NYT. This is clearly designed for use by teachers in classrooms, but hey, we’re all students in the school of life, so here’s the PDF of 500 prompts: https://static01.nyt.com/images/blogs/learning/pdf/2014/500PromptsNarrativeAndPersonalWriting.pdf 

9/23/24

How productive and organized are you?

I find that I am actually getting much more organized lately, especially at work. There’s always so much going on and so many different projects happening simultaneously, so I am always taking notes, making checklists, curating calendars, creating filing systems and so on. Last year, I successfully moved everything on my work computer from internal server-based storage into cloud-based storage. That took quite some doing, but it was well worth it, especially when I briefly needed to work from home as my mom recovered from knee replacement surgery at my house. I also created systems for labeling and filing away different kinds of documents, making them much easier for me to refer back to later.

Recently, we’ve been starting to incorporate Microsoft Loop into the rotation of things we’re using to keep our projects together - and I’m enjoying it so much that I even sought out and watched videos to learn more about the service. I really enjoy the work I do, but I guess if I were to think about a big-time career change (not just doing what I do now but elsewhere), I’d consider looking into project management or something like that.

Which is very funny considering that, in my school days, I was often forced into the role of “the one kid who ends up doing everything in the group project because everyone else slacks off” and I resented that. I didn’t want my own grades to suffer, so I did the work, but I wasn’t happy about it. Things have changed, haven’t they? Now I enjoy being the one with all the filing systems, checking in on projects, taking notes. 

I’ve even started to use a pen-and-paper planner after years of just putting things in the calendar on my phone. I do still do that also, but in addition to that, I have a Hobonichi Techo Weeks planner. My coworker put me on to it. She had a spare blue leather cover for a Weeks planner and gave it to me near the end of last year, inspiring me to head over to Kinokuniya and purchase a 2024 planner to go in it. I enjoy using it and also write about good things that happen every day on one side of the weekly layout. I do wish they had included a 366th day in the daily check-off page, though. Like, how do you manage to forget 2024 is a leap year? It’s literally on the calendar. You are a planner company. Plan for it!

Another organization project I am working on, though just bit-by-bit, is organizing my photos and backing them up to a portable hard drive. I’m going through each year’s photos, as downloaded from Google Takeout, and removing any ones that are blurry or whatnot. I’m also putting memes into a different folder. That process is slower going, but it’s in progress.

I think all this organization is good for my brain, too. I’m prone to anxiety, the fear that I am forgetting about something, and if I don’t write things down then I’m afraid they will just fade away and disappear from my brain like deleting data from a video game memory card. The processes - writing things down, making lists, keeping calendars, taking notes - are all therapeutic in their own way and contribute to my productivity at work and in my personal life.

[altschmerzes]

radical face lyric prompt meme

is this still a thing people do? no? we’ll go retro then. put this together to celebrate having crossed 1,000,000 words posted on ao3 - send me a number + some characters + a trope or episode of canon or whatever other bonus wishes/details/ideas come to mind and i’ll write a oneshot based on the prompt! feel free to reblog and join in.

and i am always reminded of lies / that we told but never meant / and at night i can still hear you grin like an echo / sounding for my sins (echoes)

there ain’t no fixing this but i like that you tried / sometimes the hardest part is being right / there ain’t no helping me but i like that you lied / sometimes it’s worth the burn marks to feel the light (dead ends)

i fall asleep in the backseat of your old car (under the same sun)

i was there when you grew restless / left in the dead of night / and i was there when three months later / you were standing in the door all beat and tired / and i stepped aside (always gold)

when the water was warm / walked in over my head / but you pulled me out by the collar of my shirt (summer skeletons)

sometimes sleep becomes your enemy / it feels better to dream when the sun is accounted for (sunn)

you held me up when i was drowning / and wrapped me in your spare blankets / and you held my head while i lay broken / and told me i would sleep soundly / and that life goes on (personal giants)

and you’re always laughing / but you always look afraid (haunted)

maybe this time we will get it right / every step’s just a step until the one where you stop / they say the third time’s the charm / yeah well how about the ninth (the river with no name)

i am not the one you wanted here / but i will fill in my post (rivers in the dust)

i got a picture on the mantle piece / of the way that i thought that we’d end up / but this bears no resemblance to that (sleepwalking)

i feel you breathing / i hear you curse my name / i hope that you’ll forgive me one of these days (winter is coming)

i can’t fix what was done to you / but i’ll shield you from the rain (small hands)

there’s only so much good a man can take / when he ain’t so good himself / you remind me of what i could’ve been / but the reminder ain’t much help (reminders)

i’m glad you were my friend / though i may never see you again (chains)

once you see what lies behind a mask / that mask will never look the same / and once the pattern shows itself / you can’t pretend that nothing’s changed (guilt)

you don’t owe me a thing / i have always been lost it’s a comfortable place / i don’t owe you a thing / you were always just something that i could never save (reveries)

took a river of bad blood / but now i see where i came from / can’t grow a proper branch when half the trunk is rotten (bad blood)

i said i’d fix this / that i’d set things straight / you begged me not to / but i couldn’t stay couldn’t wait (all is well (it’s only blood))

i won’t bend and i won’t move / don’t have a lot left just anger and something to prove (the strangest things)

[yay-is-for-yorses]

Putting this under a cut cause it got a bit long BFHDGFD

OK SO!

the start of my yorseness was june 14th, 2023 on this post, where Yorse was casually mentioned by Erros

Later, on september 1st, I did a youtube stream while on discord call with some friends, and drew Yorse and Blake in the same positions as a Horse Prince screenshot. At that time I didn't know it had even been done before, which is wild!

I posted it on tumblr, and among the notes, I learned that someone else had, in fact, done it before me! It was tumblr user imnotgayyelling, all the way back in 2020.

Sometime in December, I decided that maybe I should spare my rwby mutuals of the yorseposting, So I made yay-is-for-yorses. (After all, if hay is for horses, does that mean yay is for yorses?)

Then, later, I started to wonder why Yorse was made in the first place. And that lead to, of course, Yorse's creation. I asked around, but the answers I got were inconclusive, this was now a mystery!

A mystery that had to be solved.

I went to a site similar to findtags, and decided with perfectly logical thoughts, to scroll down the entirety of the yorse tag. This yielded not only a plethora of yorse posts over the 5 years she's existed, but also a look into all the discussions -and drama- relating to it!

These were (Off the top of my head anyways):

- Yorse's mere existence as a cursed meme - A very cursed fic featuring Yorse, the subsequent search for it's creator, and a confession on valentines day (the ficwriter was actually someone I'd been asking about Yorse in the past!) - Arryn, a voice actor in the show, finding out about Yorse, and discussion of wether or not it was ethical to involve crew members in fandom cursedness - All the yorse-type creations following in Yorse's footsteps (most prominently being Bloconut)

Arryn's reaction was especially focused in a later burst, as it showed a tumblr tag search for yorse! This meant I had at least one yorse post to try and find the date of. Though evidently, the username had been changed (or worse; account deactivated.)

I discussed with notoftheskaal, a mutual who participated in a good deal of my yorsing, and eventually made a post asking if anyone knew where to find the post. And we were in luck! Buzzbuzzbumbleby had found it, revealing that luckily, it had just been a username change.

Alongside scrolling the tag, I also searched the archive of commonly appearing users to see all the posts they'd tagged as Yorse. Which yielded a good amount of conversations, but not many first contenders.

After all the scrolling, the earliest post I landed on was by a user named princessnightt on February 6th 2019, and featured, wouldn't you know it, horse prince!

We know now that it wasn't the first, and in fact there were signs on the post itself, but alas I didn't think to look for them at the time. Instead, the search efforts slowed, and I returned to regular yorseness.

Wouldn't you know it, feb 6 was fast approaching! My Yorse brainrot was yet to let up, so I decided to focus my energy on creating a Yorse texture pack for Minecraft (which, fun fact, I still play with!)

I shared my progress with a few tumblr mutuals, among whom was cowcowow! Cowcow also participated and, though past the date itself, made a Yorse plushie! (by sewing the head of a Yang onto the body of a Yorse)

Fae was even kind enough to send it to me, which is how I am in possession of what is (probably) the only Yorse plushie! hehe

At some point, I decided to go back to that post by princessnightt. They had tagged someone named Hallucid, but the blog was deactivated (you can tell cuase url tagging redirects even if a username is changed, but goes nowhere if the blog deactivates).

It was a dead end. Unless.

I may not be able to go to hallucid's blog, BUT. I could find someone they talked to, as long as that person tagged their asks by username. I searched the latest username I knew (hallucid2), and lo and behold.. there was a blog!

Down into their archive I went, to February 6th. Where I found a Yorse post, The Yorse post, in fact. Older than all the rest, and Horse Prince to boot!

To be honest, I have no clue how, but I also managed to find a blog that named Hallucid as one of their old usernames.

I sent them a dm, and through some sort of magic, it was the very same! Meaning I had found both the first Yorse, and it's original creator.

I also recently made a page for Yorse on fanlore! Though I wouldn't say it's high quality, eheh

hey !! since you're interested in digital archaeology, would you be interested in hearing about how I searched for the first Yorse post? (which I now know was by an account that has been deactivated, and thus didn't show up in tag searches)

Absolutely! I thought that was something that just occurred this morning but there is deeper lore to it?

[vendetta-if]

Baby!ruthless!MC being those little red flag kids that are super adorable and sweet but then ask disturbingly gory/violent questions that leave the recipient just staring at them awestruck while the child blinks up at them innocently because they don’t realize how fucked up the thing they just said was.

Like the he’s just a little guy! Oh, he’s a little fucked up actually meme.

Scenario: Cute baby MC sitting with their most favouritest Gramdma ever, maybe brushing her hair or feeding her warm soup or just giggling and hugging her and then suddenly lacing their chubby little fingers with hers and saying in those choppy sentences that young children speak in when they are still learning how to pronounce certain sounds/words “I heard! that if the you get toooo cold that you can get fah-rost-bite and your fingers and nose and toes all fall off! It’s super painful, I think! Have you ever done that Baba Alina? Have you ever made somebody so cold you just snap them right apart? Have you snapped off somebody’s arm? Have you ever fah-rost-bited somebody’s neck off their shoulders, Baba Alina?” The rest of the family just looks at MC and each other in concern but MC is just blinking like they asked why the sky is blue.

Alternative scenario: Cute baby MC asks Grandpa if he ver commanded some to hurt/kill themselves or their loved ones, Grandpa just eyes Viktor because he knows his son would want him to lie or change the subject, but MC is just looking him like he hung the moon and he’s torn, but then MC adds “if you didn’t, it’s kinda a waste” and it becomes very obvious that yes this is his grandchild

Ruthless MC is my baby girl(gender neutral) I love then so much if you t tell

Aww that’s kinda cute, but also as you said, fucked up 😆 But really, such ruthless MC is lucky to be born in the Morozov family then where all of the members are just as or close to that level of ruthlessness. Yes, even Viktor. He might be kinder but make no mistake, he’s capable of being really ruthless to people who hurt or put the people he loves and cares for in danger.

For sure, they would all be surprised and shocked, but it won’t be long until they are used to it. Viktor would probably try to teach MC that they can’t just say those kinds of things to just anyone. If it’s him, Grandpa, Grandma, Luka, Ash, Cara, and Rin, then it’s okay 😩 Viktor just mostly doesn’t want MC to say those stuff to the wrong people and they think and treat MC as a weirdo (also, worried that it might not end well for them 😂).

Grandma would be surprised for a second, before booping MC’s nose lightly. They’re still soo adorable. “Well, I did turn someone into an ice sculpture once, although I didn’t immediately ruin it. It’d be a waste, wouldn’t it? How about I show you what kind of other pretty stuff I can make with my power?”

Grandpa would be staring at MC with a glint of pleasant surprise in his eyes. “I can already see you making me proud in the future,” he says, patting MC’s head fondly. “The answer to your question is yes. Sometimes, examples need to be made to spare us more work in the future. One day, I’ll teach you more about it, yes?”

[dilfjohnnyaf]

Boyfriend Material

Pairing : Dom! Jaehyun x sub!fem reader

Genre : smut with plot, unprotected sex, jealous sex , shower sex , fluff if you squint lol, Friends to Lovers, lil bit of humour too cuz what's life without a bunch of memes🥴💃🏻

WARNING : 18+ content, minors dni.

A/N: heyy you guys it's me!! I hope y'all enjoy this fic. Please leave some comments abt your thoughts and please reblog. I'd very much like to know what you think about my fics 💓. Les go😽

------------------------------------------------------------

You and Jaehyun have been besties for over 4 yrs now and did practically everything together. You were so close that ppl thought y'all were dating-

Like what?!

Jaehyun never showed any type of interest in dating you ..... That's what you thought until the day when Yuta called you to hang out with NCT. Nothing new in that, you knew NCT and they knew you

Y'all went to the amusement park that day and after a few rides Haechan being the sneaky bij he is, suggested that we all should ride the Disco Pang Pang.

So you were dragged to the ride despite you saying "IM WEARING A FUCKING SKIRT I CAN'T RIDE!" (but you can lol)

You sat beside Johnny during the ride and as expected your skirt was flying and you were desperately trying to not show ur panties to the boys and the struggle was FOR REAL! but Johnny boy being the gentleman he is put his hand over your legs and held the skirt in place.

So you survived the ride and yall said your goodbyes and went your ways. Jaehyun came with you to drop you home. N the whole ride home he didn't say a word. You tried to start up a conversation like" Today was fun right?"

N he literally goes "Yea whatever"

Like what-

Anyways maybe he was just hangry ig🤷🏻‍♀️

Time skip to y'all reaching home and he agreed to come inside for some beer

You was looking for the beer cans in the fridge and Jae was taking a shower in the spare bathroom. You went in room to change and while you were in your bra and panties he just walked in 😶.

INSTANT PANICK 2.0

You were trying to cover yourself and said "Omgg Jaehyun you should've knocked!"

"I'm glad I didn't"

Boi what-

He walks over to you and says " I saw you during the Disco Pang Pang ride and Johnny's hand was on your lap"

"Yea that's bcuz my skirt was flying and I didn't want y'all to see my panties"

He says " I'll let it slide this time...Don't let him touch you again"

"Let it slide what? Stop acting like you're my boyfriend Jae"

Something inside him snapped.

He wrapped his hand around your neck and said " Well I'm about to change that tonight" Without wasting another second he kissed your lips. Seeing that you weren't kissing back he bit your lip. You opened your mouth and he slide his tongue in. You couldn't think of anything else and kissed him back.

Jaehyun removed his hand from your neck and let it travel up and down your body. He grabbed your ass and spanked it make you jump and wrap your legs around his waist. He entered the bathroom and turned on the shower without breaking the kiss. Cold water started flowing down your bodies and you said "Jaehyun its uncomfortable in my wet underwear"

He said "Then lemme get rid of it"

He turned you around so that your back was facing him. He unclipped the bra and immediately started massaging your boobs.

"Jaehy- ahahhh" you moaned. You leaned your head back on his shoulder and moaned. While his left hand was playing with your breast, his right hand snaked down to your panties and started playing with your pussy. "Omg-"

"Saying something kitten?" he said with a smirk.

Jaehyun rubbed and pinched your clit making you moan like a animal in heat.

He removed your panties and inserted his long fingers in your pussy and slowly started finger fucking you. "Jaehyun faster please" you begged. He removed his fingers making you whine like a child . He turned you around and slammed you against the cold wall.

"You don't deserve to call me by my name. Its Sir from now on."

Before you could say yes he kissed you and stared finger fucking at the speed of light.

"Sir slow down please- ahhhhh"

You came on his fingers and your legs gave out. You sank on the floor, panting and looked up to see Jaehyun sucking on his fingers tasting you. " Sweet like honey. You blushed and looked down. "Get on your knees and suck me" You got on your knees while he removed his boxers. His hard dick sprung out ,you immediately started rubbing his shaft up and down. You gave his slit a few kitten licks and kissed it. His dick was already dripping precum. "Kitten don't tease me or I'll make sure you regret it"

"Yes sir " you said and took him in your mouth. You started bobbing your head up and down slowly first and then gained speed. You looked up to see Jaehyun with his head thrown back and his mouth open.

"Aaahghaahgh" he pushed your head deeper on his cock and released his load in your mouth. Now you understood why they say hearing a man moan is heavenly.He let your head go and you opened your mouth with your tongue out so that spit and cum drooled down your tits.

You swallowed the remaining cum, "Stand up " he said you stood up and he pushed you against the wall, wrapped your right leg against his waist and positioned himself.

He slid himself in you and took a minute to adjust to the feeling. The next moment he was thrusting in and out of you like a wild animal. You tried not to be loud and accidentally let out a involuntary moan when he hit your g-spot.

"Found it" he said with a cocky smirk and kept slamming into your g-spot. You could see Jaehyun thrusting into you like a wild animal.

"Sir I'm cumming-"

No you're not. You will not cum unti I say so."

"Sir please let me cum" you cried 

"Just a little bit longer kitten"

"Now- Ahhhhhhhgghh" he said

"Fuck  ahhaahhh"

Jaehyun came in you and you came on his dick. You both were panting with his cock still inside you. "Well that was wild" you said

"And so fucking hot" he added while kissing you.

"Sooo we're dating now?" he asked

"yess we are baby" you said

Jaehyun and you started showering when you suddenly realised, "hey... did you use a condom?"

"Oh fuck-"

"JAEHYUN I COULD GET PREGNANT WTF!!!"

Fin💓

[honeydewdrew]

ghoulin’ around

a buzzfeed unsolved au, d.s headcanon

a/n: he’s back, baby. & he’s here to stay. live, laugh, love bfu!drew starkey au!

disclaimer: loosely based on episodes of buzzfeed unsolved :P

summary: castle in the mountains but you don’t even get there OR your car breaks down & there’s only one bed at the lodge

pairing: buzzfeed unsolved ghoul hunter!drew starkey x f!reader

warnings: swearing, nipples, a car breaking down, mad fluff

feedback and comments are super appreciated!!

for this week’s episode, you and drew (& the crew) hit the road for a drive up to the mountains to investigate an old castle, supposedly haunted by their former residents

it’s fall and as you and drew trail the cars in front of you carrying the crew and equipment, the autumn foliage lined the seemingly endless road

intercut here a montage of you and drew doing your very own karaoke, cutting between vibing to Khruangbin, to belting Ariana Grande, to trying to catch every Baby Keem lyric (we’re gonna pretend copyright isn’t an issue LOL), & even some Hamilton

“what is that?” you ask, when you see smoke coming out from the hood of the car

drew frowns in concern, “shit.”

after shooting the crew a quick text, everyone pulls over to the side of the road, just when the car starts surrounding itself with smoke

“looks like there’s a bit of a delay in our ghost adventure tonight,” you make a face into the go pro camera you took out

drew shows up behind you and says “you think it’s an omen? like the ghosties are mad and they wanna kill us before we even get there?”

you roll your eyes

with almost an hour left to the destination, you all decided it was too much to wait for the car to get fixed and try to make it there for the night, so the decision was made to check into the nearest lodge to spend the night

the little lodge 20 mins away was quaint and newly built, just a year old. everything was fresh and new and modern and not a creepy old place off the highway, which put you at ease. it wasn’t a spacious hotel, though, so after the crew booked their rooms, there was only one room available left

“so we’re sharing a room, i guess,” you tell drew, holding up the key. “one bed.”

he scratched the back of his neck and shrugged. “i can take the floor. if you can spare a pillow.”

“i know this place looks clean, but trust me, hotels are breeding grounds for germs. especially the grimy floors.”

“it’s okay, i don’t mind.”

“you’re nasty, drew. it’s fine, we can share it, i insist.”

night falls and everyone is settling in. you’ve showered and brushed your teeth and gotten changed and are now tucked under the sheets, scrolling through instagram, replying to a meme your group chat was discussing.

you don’t even notice drew is shirtless until he pulls back the covers and slips under the covers on his respective side of the bed.

you glance over then turn your head towards your phone to hide your face and try to ignore the heat in your cheeks

“your nipples are out,” you mutter.

“free the nipple, y/n. don’t bully my nips.”

you snort in response as he unplugs his phone from the charging cable. “should we post some behind the scenes for the unsolved account?”

still trying to ignore the warmth of his body so close to you, you give him a ‘mmhmm’ and he begins to film an insta story

“pit stop in this week’s production, we’ll be back at it in the morning! y/n, you have anything to say?” he turns the camera to you.

“oh shit,” you say, “hi guys! bit of a predicament today, but nothing the ghoul kids can’t handle. love you guys!” you give a big cheesy grin, waving to the camera

he turns the camera back to him, making a funny face before ending the recording

after a while of stiffness, you decide to turn in for bed and drew does the same. the two of you lie in the dark in silence for a while before you hear, “are you still awake?”

“yuh.”

“i’m bored.”

“what do you want to talk about?”

“i don’t know. are you cold?”

you flip over to face him. his hair is a mess and his eyes are tired. cutest thing you’ve seen all day.

“a little bit,” you respond. “i hate hotel bed sheets.”

“should we like... huddle closer?” he asks

you squint in the dark, trying to make out what his expression is. “like cuddling?”

he exhales, “yeah. i guess. i don’t want you to be uncomfortable or anything...”

“oh please it’s fine,” you scoot closer, your head almost tucked under his chin. “i’ve seen your bare butt. i can’t believe you did that by the way. they’re never letting us back there.”

“i’m telling you, the ghosts at that house won’t dare scare us if we do come back. my literal naked ass streaking through their halls should’ve spooked them enough.”

you both laugh and you melt into the soft rumble of his chest. “yeah. just keep your nipples away from me.”

“what is your problem with nipples?”

the two of you chat all night until your voices slur from sleepiness, and you’re lulled to sleep to the sound of drew talking about beavers

you wake the next morning incredibly warm. you clutch the pillow you were wrapped around closer, nuzzling into it when you realize it’s softly moving.

peeking your eyes open, you find your arms and legs around drew. as his big spoon. your face is pressed against his back and arm around his waist

you giggle a bit at the absurdity, trying to untangle yourself from him when he begins to shift and turn over, nearly crushing you.

you slip out just in time and his eyes open. “hi, sweets,” he says with a sleepy smile.

you bite back a sigh and feel heat in your cheeks again. hitting him with a pillow, you say, “rise and shine sleeping beauty! the day awaits!”

you’re the last ones to come down to the lobby and maddy, one of the producers, shoots you a look. you shoot a look back, one that suggested ‘i don’t know why you’re looking at me like that.”

the notification sounds from drew’s phone caught your attention. “what’s up with your phone?” you watch him scroll on his phone. “your phone’s been blowing up all morning? is it from all your side chicks?” you tease.

“yeah, becky and some others,” he smirks at you. “no it’s instagram. people are freaking out over the story i posted last night.”

you open your phone to a million notifications as well. if the do not disturb setting didn’t exist, there was no way you would’ve gotten any sleep.

oh my god they’re sleeping in the same bed !!!!!

does this confirm they’re dating??!

omg mom & dad 😍😍

mommy? sorry daddy? sorry mommy? sorry daddy?

he looks so good,,

“oh my god, they’re shipping us,” you say.

drew shrugs, “i mean they have been,” he looks over at you. “are you okay?”

“it’s fine,” you shut off your phone. “it’s just some comments. we’re professionals and this just feeds the fans. right?” part of you is scared. you felt like there were feelings being developed and the spotlight on the relationship between the two of you made you feel exposed.

“as professional as ghost hunters get,” drew says, forcing a chuckle, “but hey, let’s get this show on the road.”

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

(insert spare change meme here)

Spare affection thoughts? Spare affection headcanons or thoughts or just any content in general please?I am a needy tired being who just wants to cuddle the big boi and bury my face in his neck floof is that too much to ask for :,)

no comrade, it is never too much to ask. you deserve to snuggle the mothman!!! Affection HCs: Warnings for nightmares, crying, attempted isolation, and (small) injuries ~ * ~ -This moth. Oh my god this moth. He is AFFECTIONATE -He LOVES being sweet and snuggly with you -You get home from work? He scoops you up in a hug -You enter the same room he’s in? He comes over and puts his head on your lap -You WAKE UP?? He’s curling up on the bed to pull you close -He is the DEFINITION of affectionate -BUT!! He is also always extremely gentle with you -He’s very aware that he’s much bigger, heavier, and SHARPER than you so he’s always very careful around you -He literally NEVER puts his entire weight on you -Still loves snuggling up to you tho <3 -He is extremely touch and affection-starved because he was probably on his own for a bit before you found him -At first he was very tentative because he didn’t expect you to want to come near him -You had to go REALLY slow to get him used to it -But the first time you gave him a hug he cried -Now that he’s gotten more used to it he wants affection 24/7 -Mothman wants cuddles and he wants them NOW -Sometimes if he just feels like carrying you he’ll come up from behind you and pick you up -Because he’s so big he can cradle you in his arms perfectly -If he notices you’re sleepy he WILL pick you up and either lay you down on a bed or hold you in his arms -His fluff makes the perfect pillow and the texture is so nice -If you need something to bury your face in he will offer his fluff as well -He puts his head on your stomach a lot!! It’s comfy and doesn’t hurt you :) -When you cuddle with him you feel so safe, like nothing can hurt you -If you’re working and he wants snuggles he’ll either sit next to you or place his head on top of yours -He also presses his forehead to yours a lot and gives you headbumps like a cat -If you hold out your hand he WILL plonk his head down into it -You hold his face a lot to help him calm down so he does the same for you <3 -The first time he did that he was very cautious and hesitant, but you just held onto his hand for stability so he considers it a success -Sometimes if he comes home after being injured he’ll just flop onto you even tho he should definitely go get medical help -He also has nightmares a lot -The first few times you had to get up to comfort him and your presence helped ground him to reality -After that you invited him to sleep next to you, and the nightmares have gotten a lot less frequent -Even if you go to sleep on opposite sides you WILL wake up to him hugging you -Just like you love petting his fluff he loves playing with your hair!! -He has a thing for textures and your hair is one of the best -He’ll do his best to not pull on any tangles because that hurts -Like I’ve said before he lays his wings over you and brushes your cheeks with them -For him this is a HUGE sign of trust because his wings are quite delicate compared to the rest of him -They’re the perfect summer blanket because they’re so thin -Once he scooped you up a bit too quickly and accidentally scratched you -He was so sad and worried -He tried to isolate himself for a while but you came back to him and reassured him that you still loved him -He cried but afterwards purred the loudest you’ve ever heard -He also loves it when you lay on him and doze off! -Because he can look down at you and marvel at how wonderful you are and how much he loves you <3