#you okay? yeah should we ask each other that 5 more times?

[thoughtfulchaos773]

[bed-chemist]

Smoking 🍃 with vinnie smut cause he’s so pookie bear (make it rough too please 💀💀)

❝FMB❞ - vinnie hacker x reader

─⋆♡ an: based on this ask. FMB means f⋆ck me back. hopefully it's rough enough. this is my first smut post so i didn't want to make it too too rough, just fyi. unedited so ignore any mistakes. i hope yall enjoy. ★ ˙ᵕ˙ liv

─⋆♡ summary: you and vinnie have a complex relationship. it all comes to a head when you become bold enough to confront him post-blunt.

─⋆♡ warnings: overstimulation, softdom!vinnie, smut, fluff towards the end, tiny bit of angst, 18+ black!writer, language, alcohol, drugs, D!NC, physical descriptors (brief), choking, spitting, slight exhibitionism if you squint, claiming, rough smut, squirting, anal play, unprotected sex (i do not condone irl, wrap before you tap).

⋆word count: 3.9k ⋆ masterlist ⋆

The loud bass of music floats in the background as I tap through Snapchat stories on my phone. The couch next to me dips and when I turn, I see Vinnie has joined me.

He doesn’t speak to me before pulling out a blunt and sparking it. As is, me and Vinnie’s relationship was complicated. We started off as friends, then smoke buddies. But the more we smoked together, the more we felt for each other. Or at least, I fell for him.

We had kissed and made out, but we’ve never had sex. After a few dates, I was becoming restless. The frustration of his mixed signals got the best of me. Now in the darkness of the crowded room, I’ve become bold enough to confront him.

I watch him as he inhales and exhales the smoke like a chimney. He seemingly notices my intense stare and stops. “Did you need something?” he asks with an attitude.

You can practically feel steam whistling out of your ears from how fuming your brain is right now. “Yeah actually. Give that to me,” I snap, pointing at his blunt.

He shrugs, ashing the blunt on the coffee table. “Okay,” he concedes, passing me the joint.

Letting the smoke dance in my lungs, I choke it out slowly. Now that the weed is hitting, I decide now is the time. “Vinnie, are you still interested in me?” I ask him abruptly.

He chuckles and takes the blunt from me. “Oh, baby. Of course I fucking am. Why would you even ask me that?” he shoots back with an eyebrow raised.

Frowning, I pick at my cuticles out of nervousness. “Because we go on dates, we kiss, but we’ve never had sex. I just don’t know what you want any more,” I confess, standing from the couch in a huff. 

Of course, I want to take things further. But I’m not sure if he wants me anymore when he barely touches me.

He stops me from moving any further, tugging my hand. I grudgingly turn around, looking down at him. “Because, doll. We haven’t had the sex talk yet,” he discloses, rubbing his free hand up and down my thigh.

I roll my eyes and scoff, snatching the blunt out of his hands to take a hit. He places his hands on my hips, watching me intensely. “What do you mean by ‘sex talk’? I’m not 5,” I ask after blowing out a toke.

He stands until he’s staggering high towers over me. “I mean…” he pushes lightly, backing me into the wall so I’m trapped between his body and the drywall. “I want to know what you like, what you don’t like, and what you’ll beg for before I feel you cumming on my cock,” he whispers in my ear, licking a stripe up my neck afterward. 

My head tips back in a moan, which makes him as hard as a rock. “Fuck, baby. Do you see what you do to me? I want nothing more than to make you feel good, in the best way that I can, for the rest of my life.” he presses his body into mine, slowly kissing up my neck.

One of the partiers comes up behind Vinnie and taps him on the shoulder. He ignores them, waving them off with the rest of the blunt. His hand moves to the inside of my thigh and he rubs me so close that I know he can feel the inside of my legs shake. “Should I take care of you right here?” he bites my neck, and I whimper, pulling his hair.

Vinnie pulls back from me, piercing a hole into my eyes. “Please?” I beg, gnawing on my lip.

He uses the other hand and wraps it around my throat, effectively restricting my breathing. He tilts my head to the side. “Do you think you deserve it?” he whispers against my lips with his eyebrow raised. 

Struggling, I lightly nod my head in his firm grip. “Yes, Vinnie,” I squeak out, and he gives me one last squeeze on the throat before grabbing my wrist and yanking me through the crowd.

Bodies brush past me as Vinnie drags me up the steps to his room. “Wait, where are we going?” I ask, confused. He just asked if I needed to be taken care of right there and then... I did say yes.

“You think I’m gonna let everyone watch me fuck you?” he scoffs.

Once we got the sex talk out of the way, Vinnie makes quick work to get me undressed. I moan into the darkness of the room as Vinnie leaves love bites down my neck, only breaking the contact to lift my tank top over my head. He pauses his movements to take in the black lacy bralette I'm wearing. “Fuck, baby. You don’t know what you do to me,” he groans, then smashes his lips back onto mine. 

He slams me against his closed bedroom door before slowly dropping down onto his knees. Watching him sink to the ground has an involuntary giggle leaving my lips. “Vinnie, I didn’t think you were going to actually-” he cuts me off, spinning me around so my ass is facing him.

Suddenly, an echoing smack verberates off the walls and my ass cheeks are on fire. Yelping, I sink my teeth into my bottom lips, trying to muffle the noise I’m making.

He slowly inches his hands up my legs until my skirt is fully pushed up to my stomach. His fingers meet my panties, and he runs my fingers over them, seemingly savoring every last moment. “Did you wear these for me, sunshine?” He hooks one finger under one side, pulling it back and making the elastic snap around my hips.

I reach out to support myself on anything to keep my knees from buckling. “No,” I joke, and he bends my knees a bit.

He rubs calming circles into the back of my thighs with his thumbs. “Don’t need you collapsing on my baby,” he informs me.

Taking both sides in his hands, he rips the fabric in half and shreds it off my body like paper. “Shame. I would’ve let you keep them.” 

Gasping, I look down and watch them fall to the ground. He palms my ass, spreading my cheeks further apart. “Bend over just a little bit more, baby,” he instruct, kissing my ass on both sides. 

Slowly shifting in his grasp, I whine as I bend over. I’m desperate for him, all over me. Filling every hole over and over again until I’m screaming for help.

He hovers his mouth over my pussy. “You’re so fucking gorgeous,” he praises me, running his pointer finger up and down my folds to collect my wetness.

“Let me tell you something, sunshine,” he grumbles, rubbing his fingers in circles on my puffy, swollen nub. “There's absolutely nothing I wouldn’t do for you. Do you understand?” he looks up at me, awaiting my response.

Unable to focus, I just nod my head.

“You have to use your words, baby.” he instantly retracts his fingers from my clit bringing them into his mouth. With a pop, he pulls them out, moaning at the taste of my arousal.

I groan, throwing my head back in frustration. “Yes, I know. Just please take care of me, Vinnie,” I practically beg for the second time tonight.

He returns his fingers to my pussy, slowly rubbing around my entrance. “If you asked me to shoot myself, I would,” he growls, slowly sinking his fingers into me. Curling them downwards on every thrust, his fingers search for that spongy spot. He pulls out and thrusts into me again, and my breath quickens. “If you asked me to slit my wrists, I would.” Quickening his pace, my moans echo through the large bedroom. “You gotta stay quiet, baby. I wanna be the only one to hear those pretty moans.” 

He uses his free hand, bringing it up to my clit, rubbing fast circles on my sensitive bud. His fingers are thrusting into me at such an intense rate that I feel the world collapsing beneath me. My pussy contracts around his fingers and he groans deeply, sending a shiver up my spine. “Fuck yourself on my fingers, sunshine,” he commands, hitting my sweet spot. 

I mewl, obeying his commands, and begin rocking back into him. My orgasm starts approaching rapidly, his fingers drive into me at an unrelenting pace. When my walls flutter, he instantly slows his pace. “Not yet, baby. You can’t cum until you’re quiet.”  

Crying again, I bring my hand up to muffle the sound successfully. He applies more pressure on the quick circles he’s drawing on my clit. I arch my back again until I’m moving with his fingers just as he requested. I moan loudly, the coil in my stomach about to snap. 

He blows a quick shot of air onto my exposed clit, the chill making the coil snap. My vision turns white as I quietly moan out, "Fuck, Vinn.”

“That’s it, sunshine. Cum for me, let go,” he murmurs underneath me, and I can feel the lust dripping off his tongue as my orgasm rocks through me. The pace of his fingers doesn’t slow as he works me through my orgasm, and I hear my nails scratch against the drywall. My legs quake and my back arches slightly, my mouth opening in a silent moan. 

He slows his thrusting and pulls out of me, rising to his feet. He turns me around to face him, his eyes taking in the fucked out expression on my face. “You wanna know how good you taste, baby?” Grabbing my chin, he rubs his thumb over my bottom lip.

I close my eyes, trying to catch my breath and lean back into the wall. “Yes,” I whisper, and as soon as the words leave my lips, his fingers sink into my mouth. Deciding to tease him, I swirl my tongue around his digits, imagining my tongue on his cock. His fingers push back further into my throat until I gag a little, then he pulls them out. Fucking hope he’s impressed that I can take them that far without coughing.

Without another thought, I smash my lips against his, savoring the taste of my orgasm on his tongue. “God, you taste so fucking good. I could eat you forever,” he growls, moving my body back onto the bed.

He crawls on top of me and his bulge is pressed into me once again. “Vinnie, please. I need you.” I whimper into his mouth as my shaky fingers move to slowly unbutton his shirt. 

But he grabs my wrists, stopping me. “I got it, sunshine,” he laughs, then makes quick work to remove his shirt. 

I shamelessly watch as he slowly strips out of his pants and his boxers. Even though I’ve seen him naked in front of me before, he’s never fully been hard. His dick is beautiful. His swollen head is already dripping with precum, making him look good enough to deep throat. 

Vinnie slowly climbs back onto the bed and my eyes widen, realizing what’s about to happen. My breathing quickens in anticipation as he comes down to kiss me hard and deep. 

I moan into him, but my hands move to his chest to push him back as I look down, suddenly scared. “It’s too big, I don’t think it’ll fit,” I insist, crawling away from him.

He grabs my ankles, pulling me back down. “We’re gonna make it fit, baby,” he retorts, his eyes dark. 

The tip of his dick moves back and forth in between my folds, collecting wetness. I whimper, squeezing his shoulders. 

“Hey, sunshine. Look at me.” He grabs my chin until I make eye contact with him. “We can stop if you want to stop. I won't go any further,” he reassures, resting his forehead on mine.

I immediately shake my head, inhaling a sharp breath. “No, I want this–I want you. Just be careful, please.” I pull him into me for a heated kiss and tug his hair, making him groan and deepen the kiss. 

Finally, he pulls back and lines himself up near my entrance, spitting and letting the dribble collect on his base. “This is gonna hurt, so just relax for me, baby.” My legs are pushed open a little wider. 

I nod, trying to calm myself, and he laces his fingers in mine before he moves. The tip of his shaft pushes in, and I gasp at the stretch. “Shit, Vinnie,” I cry out, squeezing his hands until my knuckles turn white. Tears prick at the corner of my eyes, the burn from his girth sends fire into my core. 

Immediately, he stops moving, looking into my eyes. “Do you want me to stop? I’ll stop,” he groans out. 

I bite my lip, shaking my head no. 

He kisses the corner of my eyes and whispers, “Okay, just relax for me, sunshine. I’ll try to make this quick.” He continues to sink slowly into me, bottoming out, and I wince again. To allow me to adjust to his length, he pauses his movements. “You’re squeezing me so tight. Fuck, I’m not gonna last long,” he breathes, bending down to kiss my neck. And then, he slowly starts rocking into me and the burn is replaced with a familiar warmth. 

“Oh, god. Vinnie,” I moan, releasing his hands to claw at his back for support. 

He’s hitting the perfect spot already, and he just got inside me. He continues to slowly push in and out of me, allowing me to savor the feeling of him inside me. I moan, biting on his shoulder. 

“More.” My legs are already shaking. “Give me more,” I demand, kissing up to his ear.

Pulling back, he looks at me. “Are you sure?” His hand strokes my curls.

I pull him down into a kiss, allowing my tongue to explore his mouth once more. “Yes, please. Use me, fuck me,” I beg, squirming underneath him.

Vinnie fists the sheets below my head and adjusts his position. I brace myself. “The safe word is ‘moon’, Sunshine. Use it if you need it.” He kisses my neck once more and begins driving into me at a steady, even rate. The tip of his length kisses my g-spot with each stroke. “Fuccckkkk,” he growls into my ear, and I feel myself squeezing him when the words hit my eardrums. 

“Vinnie,” I moan. 

The only sound outside of our pants and moans is the sound of his skin slapping against mine as he fucks me. He wraps his tattooed hand around my throat, leaning in for a kiss. And as if I wasn't already in heaven, he brings his fingers down to rub quick circles on my clit. 

“I’m gonna cum, doll. But I need to feel you squeezing me before I do,” he commands, and I cry as I arch into him. 

He pounds into me steadily, rocking my body into the bed. Each stroke pushes me closer and closer over the edge until I feel myself contracting around him. 

“Cum with me, sunshine,” he whispers against my lips, and it sends me over the edge. 

Arching my back and screaming, I claw at his back and bite his shoulder as my orgasm hits me like a train. Just when I thought he couldn’t get any deeper, he lifts my hips slightly. 

“Where do you want me to cum, love?” His dick kisses my cervix, and I know I’ll be bruised tomorrow. But I can’t bring myself to give a shit right now. 

He twitches inside me, and I lick a stripe up his neck. “Cum in me, Vinnie,” I whimper, and he growls into my neck. 

His seed spills inside me, his strokes becoming uneven. I moan at the feeling, and squeeze around him, milking out every drop of his cum as he paints my walls. It fills me up and I’ve never felt better after sex. 

He stills inside me, kissing me breathlessly, and takes a few moments to catch his breath. Before he pulls out, I wrap my arms around him, causing him to bury further inside me. “Stay,” I plead, tears threatening to spill over in my eyes.

He softly strokes my hair, wrapping his arm around me and slowly flipping us over so I’m on top. “Okay, sunshine. I got you. Fuck, that was the fastest I’ve ever cum before in my life,” 

Like I requested, he doesn’t pull out. Just pulls me closer into his body until I’m melting into the beautiful tattoos on his chest. His fingers begin tracing light patterns across my back. 

I sniffle, looking up at him with a small smile on my face, and he looks at me. “You okay, sunshine?” he asks, and I shift on his length a little bit. 

Sitting up to put my hands on his chest, I feel his dick twitching and growing inside me. “Yeah. Let's go again,” I giggle, bending down to kiss him. It surprises me how he’s already ready for round two, but I don’t complain. 

He groans into my mouth, wrapping his decorated arms around my waist. Slowly, I lift myself until I feel his tip threatening to slip out. I slide back down onto him, filling myself completely and moaning at the change of position. 

His hands tighten around my waist, helping me swirl my hips around. “I want you to know you’re mine, sunshine,” he groans, reaching up to play with my nipples as I moan at the feeling of him stretching me from this angle. 

I pick up my pace, bouncing on his dick until he’s hitting my perfect spot over and over again. My legs shake, and I feel my third orgasm approaching rapidly. My hand moves to his neck, squeezing it hard. I feel so fucking powerful, making myself cum with his length. 

Vinnie looks up at me with amazement in his eyes and slides his thumb in between us to apply pressure on my clit. I throw my head back and moan, still choking him. “God. You look so pretty when you moan.” 

The pace of his thumb quickens, and I topple over the edge, crashing into my third orgasm with a loud cry. I release my hand on his neck, falling forward. Vinnie removes his hand from my clit to catch me and keep from coming down on his body. He allows me to rest on his chest as he starts to fuck up into me, elongating my orgasm. 

“Vinnie,” I choke out, and my voice bounces off his walls. 

He picks up his pace, driving into me from below. “That’s it, doll. Scream my name. Let the world know who fucking owns you.” 

He pounds my body into his, and I grip his shoulders when I feel a tingling sensation on my clit. Wetness suddenly shoots out from between my legs, running down my thighs and covering his stomach. My whole body quakes, but he doesn’t slow down. 

“Fuck, sunshine. Look at the mess you made, cumming all over me.” 

My brain is on a different planet as he slows down, allowing me to glance down at the soaked sheets. He slowly pulls me off him and I wince, falling backward onto the bed. Then, Vinnie moves me so I’m laying on my side, out of the wet spot, before slowly pushing back into me, spooning me, and caressing my hair. “No one will ever fuck you ever again, for the rest of your life but me. Do you understand?” 

Slamming into me at an unrelenting pace, he bites my neck. His hand wraps around my throat, applying a bit of pressure. Every thrust sends me closer to the edge, and the only thing I register is him kissing the back of my neck. I’m so fucked, I can’t speak. I can’t think. 

“Yes,” I babble out, arching my back into him. 

All I feel is pure bliss. The room is spinning, and I feel another orgasm rapidly approaching. He nibbles a love bite into my neck, hitting my G-spot over and over again. My thighs are lifted a little higher until I see white. “Cum for me again, Sunshine. You feel so good when you squeeze me,” he mumbles into my neck.

I shake my head, and gripping his forearm that chokes me. “I can’t,” I cry, looking at the view from his room— everything is spinning. 

Vinnie increases his pace, slamming into me. “You can, and you will,” he snarls in my ear. 

I feel the tears spilling over in my eyes as he applies more pressure on my throat. The overstimulation of his dick drilling into me repeatedly sends me toppling over another edge, and I wail his name, feeling my soul leave my body. Everything feels fuzzy as his thrusts become sloppy before he lets out an animalistic grunt. I feel his dick twitch, then, shooting hot ropes into me. The heat of it makes me feel like I’m going to pass out, and I moan at the sensation. He continues to slowly thrust into me, riding out both of our orgasms. 

After we’re both spent, he buries himself deep inside me, stroking my hair and peppering kisses on my shoulder as I come down from my high. “You did so well for me, Sunshine. Fucking fantastic,” he praises.

He slowly caresses my hips as my body shakes against his. I wince as he slowly pulls out and scoots down to the bottom of the bed. Spreading my legs wide open, he watches our cum leak out of me. My swollen pussy contracts around nothing, pushing his seed out, and I hear him groan. 

He brings his fingers up to my entrance and I wince. “Shhh, Sunshine, I’m just making sure we don’t waste a drop,” he coos, stuffing his fingers into me and massaging my g-spot. 

An inevitable moan leaves my lips I arch my back to get closer to him. “You want to cum again?” He asks before leaning over to flick his tongue over her my. Crying out at the overstimulation, I shake my head. 

“Too bad, baby.” he quickly thrusts into me with his fingers, moaning at the taste of our orgasms mixing. His tongue flicks over my swollen, puffy clit. I haven’t used our safe word, and I know he’s going to keep pushing me until I say it.

Vinnie removes his tongue from my clit and he uses his other hand to collect our orgasms on his finger. The pace of his fingers slows and he begins rubbing a circle around my tight hole. He slowly pushes his finger into my ass, fucking me with both hands. 

I’m unable to control my movements as I thrash underneath him. His finders drive in and out, reaching the most delicious spot. 

“Give me one last one, Sunshine. I promise I’ll let you stop after,” he orders, and I move my hands to his hair to tug on it.

He pushes his finger further into my ass, curling it a bit more, and I snap. Neglecting his noise warning, my screams and my moans erupt through the room. He moans as he works both of my holes through what I assume is my last orgasm. 

As finally comes down, I whimper, “Moon,” and he stops and slowly pulls his fingers out, satisfied with my overstimulation. 

He crawls up my body, grabbing my face so I'm forced to look at him. “You're everything to me–perfect and mine,” he mumbles into my mouth and I wipe away the tears in my eyes. 

My brain buzzes with post-sex high. “Only for you,” I whisper into the night.

I did so well, and I am his.

[starlightkun]

➺ word count: 9.9k ➺ genre: exes to lovers, second chance romance, angst with a happy ending :), some hurt/comfort, fluff, ‘we broke up but somehow keep ending up as each other’s plus-ones’ trope (is that a trope? idk) ➺ warnings: mentions of death/depictions of grief, family and interpersonal conflict ➺ author’s note: i am a 5-star general in the idgaf war on the side of gaf 🫡

“This is us now, remember? Just weddings and funerals.”

“If you need anything, call me.”

That’s what Sungchan had said, two months ago, when the two of you ended things on fairly amicable terms.

“Y/N?” It hurt to hear his voice saying your name again. With such surprise, you’d obviously woken him up at this hour on a Saturday.

“Sungchan, hey,” you winced at the awkward crack in your voice. “Did I wake you up? Sorry…”

“No, it’s fine. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, uhm, I have a-a favor to ask…”

He was silent, letting you go ahead and make your request.

“Are you busy today?” You balled your hand into a fist, digging your fingernails into your palm. “My cousin’s wedding is today and my plus-one bailed on me last minute. It’s fine if you’re busy—Actually never mind, you’re probably busy and this weird—”

“I can do it.” He cleared his throat away from the speaker, and you could hear his sheets shifting around as he sat up. “What time should I pick you up?”

“Thank you,” you said again, sitting down ahead of the ceremony.

Sungchan took the seat beside you, adjusting his suit jacket. “I was supposed to be your plus-one for this anyway, wasn’t I?”

You nodded.

He flashed you a smile. “No need to thank me then. At least not for a tenth time.”

You chuckled lightly, running your hands over the material over your knees. “Sorry. I’m still freaked from my friend canceling on me last-minute, I guess.”

“Oh, I thought you were feeling awkward because you brought me.”

You smiled sheepishly. “Well, that too, I guess.”

“So who were you bringing? That canceled?”

“Chaeyeon.”

He let out a laugh at that. “Well of course she flaked.”

“I know. She volunteered after we… After she heard I wouldn’t be bringing you anymore,” you admitted. “It’s hard telling her no.”

Music started playing then, and a hush fell over the crowd.

At the reception, you were sat at a table with some older aunties and uncles that you hadn’t seen since you were little.

“Oh, this must be Sungchan!” One of the aunties gasped in delight as soon as you introduced yourself, before you could even begin introducing Sungchan. At your surely startled look, she explained, “Your mom posts pictures all the time.”

“Right. Of course,” you nodded, struggling to think of something to say.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Sungchan greeted them all politely.

“Even taller in person,” One auntie giggled to another.

“And more handsome!” The other said back.

“Y/N, you’ve grown so much since the last time I saw you,” one of the uncles saved you. “What do you do now?”

“Oh, I’m getting my master’s in—” You cut yourself off upon spotting the bride and groom making their way to your table to greet everyone. You weren’t exceptionally close with this cousin, but the wedding was close enough in distance that you felt obligated to go, especially because your mother was out of town. One of you had to make an appearance.

She leant down to kiss all the older relatives’ cheeks first, then you got up to give her and her husband hugs and your congrats.

“Thank you for coming, Y/N,” she was beaming as she looked expectantly at Sungchan behind you.

“Uhm, Sooyoung, this is Sungchan,” you introduced them quietly.

“Congratulations,” he bowed to them.

“Of course!” Sooyoung hugged him as well. “You know, the older cousins had bets, we all thought it’d be you guys next! I was so worried when Y/N hadn’t posted you in a while. But I guess I was worried for nothing.”

She and her husband laughed before taking off for the next table of guests. As chatter discussing when you and Sungchan would be getting married erupted at your own table, you pretended you couldn’t hear it as you latched onto his forearm and announced loudly, “I’m thirsty, let’s get some drinks!”

Sungchan allowed himself to be yanked off into the crowd, to the drinks table on the other side of the venue. You skin was still on fire when you arrived, refusing to look at him as you instead carefully scoured the drinks options.

“Here.” He handed you a glass of your favorite drink.

“Thanks,” you huffed, gulping down half of it in one go.

The lucky couple were on the dance floor now for their first dance, and you gnawed on your bottom lip as you watched them. God, why the hell did you even bring Sungchan? So you didn’t look like a lonely loser? Was this really much better?

“Do you want to dance?” He nudged your arm, nodding to where others had joined the couple on the dance floor. An upbeat song was playing, and plenty of fun dancing was happening.

Anything to distract yourself. “Sure.”

Sungchan put your glasses back down before offering you a hand. Against your better judgment, you placed your hand atop his and let him guide you out onto the edge of the dance floor. There, he let go of your hand again and kept a polite distance between the two of you as he started getting into some rather silly dance moves. You couldn’t fight the smile on your face as you watched him flail his gangly limbs around for what you knew was your benefit.

“I forgot how bad of a dancer you are, Sungchan,” you covered your mouth as you laughed.

“Only when I’m trying to make you laugh,” he grinned back, pulling your hand down from your face.

You kept your hands down as you matched his moves, freely giggling this time. When the song changed to a slower one, you looked between him and your table uncertainly, trying to gauge if he wanted to exit the dance floor.

Sungchan looked down at you and shrugged, once again offering you a hand. And once again, against your better judgment, you placed yours atop it and let him pull you closer. You put your other hand on his shoulder as his rested on your waist. This close, you could smell his familiar expensive cologne that he only brought out for fancy events—the last time you’d smelled it was at your anniversary dinner six months ago. His warm breaths washed over your ear, and you couldn’t see much else other than his nice tie that you knew very well was his only one, which matched perfectly with your nice outfit that you were wearing (also your only one).

“I haven’t told my family either,” he murmured, not breaking the slow pace he was swaying the two of you at.

You looked up at him, feeling guilty tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. He knew, of course he knew. He was smiling bittersweetly down at you.

“It’s okay, Y/N,” he said quietly. “I still haven’t told my family that we broke up yet.”

“Sorry,” you apologized hoarsely, even though he already said it was okay.

“Me too.”

You tentatively leaned your head on his chest. He didn’t stop you or tense up. “It’s okay.”

“Yeah, you too.”

That’s what you’d said back, when you’d broken up.

You hadn’t seen Sungchan since your cousin’s wedding sixteen days ago, and yes, you were absolutely counting the days. And yet it still surprised you to see his caller ID lighting up your phone screen. It didn’t surprise you so much the speed with which you picked up his call.

“Sungchan?”

There was heavy breathing on the other end, punctuated by a thin, quiet whine.

“Sungchan?!” You repeated, jumping to your feet off your couch. “Are you okay?”

“Y/N, I’m sorry…” He sniffled, and you could already imagine his tear-stained face.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay,” you reassured him gently. “What’s going on?”

“Are you busy right now?” He asked through a sob. “I’m sorry, my grandmother’s funeral is today and—”

“I’ll be over in ten.”

“Thank you,” Sungchan mumbled into your shoulder as you hugged each other just past his front door.

“I’m sorry, Sungchan,” you whispered, squeezing him as tight as you could. “I’m so sorry.”

Sungchan had been really close to his grandmother, she was practically a third parent to him growing up. He shook in your arms now, and you continued to hold him close.

“We need to leave soon, or we’re going to be late,” he declared, finally pulling back. “Oh, God, your shirt. I’m sorry.”

You looked down at your black blouse, where there was a large pooling of tears and presumably snot as well. You waved his concerns away. “It’s okay. You get ready, I’ll take care of it.”

As Sungchan got dressed in his room, you took a damp washcloth to your top in the kitchen, cleaning it off as best you could. It was black, it’s not like you could really see much in the first place. You were waiting for him in the living room when he came back out mostly dressed, sheepishly holding out his singular nice tie to you.

“Can you help me?” He requested. “My fingers are shaking too much.”

“Of course.” You took it and he sat down on the arm of the couch. Standing in front of him, you hooked the material around the back of his neck, then looped it easily, your own fingers moving with muscle memory. Sungchan knew how to tie a tie, but you had insisted he show you how to tie one. Whenever you two went out to events together that necessitated him wearing one, you would help him put it on, then he’d help you with your necklace in return. Really, it was just an excuse to exchange kisses in between, which you refrained from doing this time.

“You should know…” Sungchan’s head was down, watching you adjust his tie. “I still haven’t told them. I’m sorry.”

You gave the tie a pat to signal that you were finished, and smiled softly at him. “It’s fine. You’ve got other things to worry about today.”

“Oh, Sungchan, Y/N,” Sungchan’s mother found you as soon as you had stepped foot in her house for the wake, kissing her son’s cheek before enveloping you in her arms.

“Hi, Mrs. Jung,” you hugged her back. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

“Thank you.” Her eyes were misty when you pulled back. She kept you close, though, fixing a stray piece of hair for you. “Sungchan said you weren’t going to be able to make it.”

“She got someone to cover for her,” Sungchan explained for you.

Mrs. Jung smiled and nodded. “Thank you, sweetheart. My mom adored you.”

“She was a wonderful woman,” you agreed fondly.

“Here, Y/N, let’s get something to drink,” Sungchan suggested, gently ushering you away from his mom with a hand on the small of your back.

You gave her hand one last squeeze before letting him guide you over to the kitchen. It was devoid of other mourners, and you silently watched him take down two glasses from the cabinet and fill them up with water.

“Do you want to go outside?” You asked as he handed you your water.

He just nodded, and you took his free hand to pull him over towards the door that you knew led to the backyard. The two of you were the only ones out here, which made sense, as it was the middle of winter, but you didn’t complain as the cold air nipped at any bare skin.

“I don’t get it,” he stated, staring out at the dry, brown grass. His words came out as white puffs in the crisp air.

“Get what?” You replied quietly.

“What I’m even supposed to be doing right now. Here,” he explained, and you watched his throat bob up and down as he swallowed thickly. “I’m sick of crying. I at least don’t want to cry for four straight hours in front of a bunch of people.”

“Why not?”

“Why don’t I want to cry for four straight hours in front of a bunch of people?” He repeated incredulously, staring at you this time.

“Yeah,” you shrugged. “She’s your grandmother, you’re grieving. If that’s how you feel, like you need to cry for four straight hours… Then you should.”

He shook his head, taking a sip of his water despite the ice cubes in it. “Not here. I’ll cry for four hours later.”

“Okay.”

“Talk to me about something. Anything,” he prompted you, shuffling closer until you were shoulder-to-shoulder.

You looked away from his red eyes, telling yourself that they were watering from the cold. “Uhm, I watched this documentary about penguins the other day.”

“Penguins?”

“I fell asleep halfway through, though…”

Sungchan laughed loudly at that, keeling forward as he wiped at the tears that finally spilled over. A smile tugged at the corner of your lips as you watched him, and you didn’t even try to defend yourself. Once he had righted himself a little bit, still teary-eyed and grinning broadly, he nudged you with his elbow, “Well tell me what you remember from before you fell asleep.”

“Alright, alright…”

“Thank you again, Y/N,” Sungchan sighed as the two of you approached his front door that evening. “You’re… I owe you one.”

“Just repaying the favor.”

“Well…” He looked between you and his front door awkwardly. “Uhm, goodnight, I guess.”

“Are you actually going to cry for four hours now?”

He scratched the back of his neck. “Maybe three?”

You took a deep breath. “I know you didn’t want to cry in front of all those people, and I know we’re… but I can stay, if you want. Or not, if you need to be alone.”

“Can you?” He smiled weakly, his voice cracking. “I felt like I took up enough of your time today.”

“No, of course I can, Sungchan,” you reassured him.

He unlocked the front door and you followed him inside. His apartment hadn’t changed much, except in one major way—all the pictures of you two were missing. They hadn’t been replaced, you noted, the places they used to sit now starkly empty. You didn’t comment on that as the two of you silently made your way towards his room.

Sungchan handed you some clothing, and you took them into the bathroom to change out of your nice funeral outfit. Leaving your clothes folded on the bathroom counter, you waited for Sungchan to give you the okay that he was ready for you to emerge.

He was already sitting up against his headboard when you entered, and you sat down on the empty side of the bed, leaving some space between you two.

“I feel like shit,” he said bluntly, fingers messing with the blanket over his lap. “I wish I was at the part where I felt nothing.”

“I get that,” you agreed softly.

“I-I was supposed to—” He was cut off by a sniffle, and wiped at his cheeks as tears began streaming down. “I was supposed to see her. But I was too busy. And two days later she was gone.”

“Sungchan, you couldn’t have known.” You offered a hand out towards him in the space between you.

“Can I—”

“Yeah, whatever you need.”

He turned onto his side and shuffled around and down until he was curled up on top of your lap, head pressed into your middle. You pulled the blanket back over him, rubbing his back as more and more tears surfaced.

“I can’t believe she’s gone…” he blubbered into the oversized crewneck you were wearing. “I can’t even—can’t comprehend that I’ll never hug her again.”

“I know, Channie,” you murmured, feeling your own eyes water sympathetically. “I’m so sorry, baby.”

The word had slipped out without you even thinking, and you had a split-second of panic as you kept the same rhythm of rubbing his back, hoping he wouldn’t notice. If he did, he didn’t say anything, simply nestling further into you.

“It hurts, Y/N,” he whimpered. “Everything hurts. My chest, my heart, my head from crying so fucking much.”

“Do you want me to grab you an ibuprofen for your head?”

“No, stay with me.”

“Okay, Channie.” You ran your fingers through his hair. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Sungchan eventually cried himself to sleep like that, and you didn’t have it in you to try to worm your way out while he was passed out. So you fell asleep there too, cradling his head close to you and with the familiar, comforting pressure of him atop you.

You were awoken by sunlight across your lids, and tried to turn over away from the windows, stopped by the immovable weight on you. You gave up with a grunt, throwing an arm over your face instead.

“Shit, sorry…” Sungchan mumbled, rolling off of you and back to the other side of the bed. “Didn’t mean to trap you here.”

You peered at him from under your arm with one eye, offering him a sleepy smile. “It’s fine. How are you feeling?”

“Head hurts. Sad. Whatever, you know. But a lot better than if you hadn’t stayed. Thank you.”

“Good, good.” You sat up and yawned. “I’ll get you something for your head.”

“Hey, I am sorry if this was weird for you…”

You gave him as casual of a shrug as you could, hoping it came across as cool and nonchalant. “We did this before we dated too, remember? Sleepovers?”

“Yeah, and I though my heart was going to give out every time,” he laughed, rubbing his face.

You chuckled, swinging your feet over the edge of the bed. “Me too.”

After breakfast, you changed back into your clothes from the wake and stopped at the front door to say goodbye to Sungchan.

“Keep in touch, okay?” You requested, getting on your tiptoes to wrap your arms around his neck. “At least let me know you’re alive?”

He was quiet as you let go and dropped back down to flat feet, mouth opening and closing as he seemed to be putting his words together.

“Y/N—” Sungchan’s voice was hoarse as his hand cupped your cheek. He paused, puffy eyes searching your face. You froze, too swept away at being this close to him again, letting him tilt your chin up, leaning in as he did. As soon as his lips hesitantly ghosted over yours, your fingers instinctively wrapped around the back of his neck, pulling him down to fully seal your mouths together. His lips moved against yours so gingerly, so sweetly, you felt like you might melt.

When you finally pulled back for air, a thin string of saliva connected you two for a moment before it split. You immediately ducked your head and sighed, “Bad idea, God, Sungchan, I’m sorry.”

You weren’t even sure if you were apologizing for stopping, or letting it happen in the first place, or both.

“But you—”

“You’re not in a good place right now,” you explained ruefully, stepping back fully. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—”

“Oh.” He looked down at his feet dejectedly. “No, Y/N, don’t feel bad. You’re right, I’m sorry for doing that to you—”

“No, it’s fine, Sungchan, really. I just don’t think it’s a good time—”

“I get it. Uhm, thanks.”

“I meant it though, keep in touch. I don’t want to have to find out from Shotaro if you’re okay.”

He nodded and smiled, a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Of course. And hey, next wedding or funeral you need a plus-one for, let me know.”

“Maybe that’s us now. Weddings and funerals,” you chuckled.

“Ha, yeah.”

Giving his forearm one last squeeze, you opened the front door. “See you at the next one, Sungchan.”

“Bye, Y/N.”

“Pleasepleaseplease pick up…” You muttered to your ceiling as you paced around your living room, listening to the phone ring way too many times for comfort. It went to voicemail, and you swore as it beeped through for you to leave a message. “Fuck—Uh, hey, Sungchan. If you’re listening to this within like five minutes of me calling, please call me back. Long story short, it’s a funeral. Uhm, let me know if you can come. Thanks.”

You hung up and debated immediately calling him again, just in case. Before you could click the call button, though, your screen was overtaken with an incoming call from him. You let out a breath of relief, immediately picking up.

“Oh, Sungchan, thank God,” you groaned.

“Y/N, hey, are you alright?” His voice was gentle but obviously out of breath.

“Yeah, sorry if my voicemail was freaky. I found out last-minute that my mom is making me go to the funeral for her great-uncle twice removed or something that I’ve never met. I totally get if you don’t want to come, but—”

“I’ll come. I know how they are,” he assured you. “I can be at your place in five.”

“Oh, you are a lifesaver, I love you, thank you!” You gushed, hanging up the phone.

“You’re going to be just fine, Y/N,” Sungchan reassured you, squeezing your shoulder before dropping his hand back down to the small of your back as you approached the house that your mom had given you the address to.

“I know,” you breathed out, forcing a smile as you looked up at him. “Because I’ve got you here.”

You didn’t even know whose house this was, but the front door was unlocked, and many cars were parked along the streetfront. People donned in black were milling around inside, a constant, hushed din throughout the house as soon as you entered. You looked around for your mom, needing to let her know that you’d arrived.

“Y/N!” A booming voice called out your name as you turned from the foyer into the sitting room, and you tried not to wince visually.

Spinning around to greet the middle-aged man who had said your name, you gave him a canned smile and as fleeting of a hug as you could as he already had his arms out for one. “Hi, Uncle.”

“Have you gotten even bigger since the last time I saw you?” He laughed, pinching your cheek.

You turned your head away from him uncomfortably. “That was when I was middle school, I think. I have gotten taller, yes.”

“That’s not what I—”

“Jung Sungchan, I don’t think we’ve met, sir,” Sungchan firmly put himself between you and the uncle, offering his hand out.

The older man shook it, looking Sungchan up and down with an appraising eye. “No, I don’t believe we have. I’m Y/N’s mother’s cousin. You’re…?”

“Y/N’s boyfriend,” he confirmed authoritatively.

“Ah, really?” The uncle’s eyes practically sparkled. He looked around, waving someone over. “Jooeun! Come, meet Y/N’s boyfriend!”

A woman maybe five or so years older than you joined him, draping herself over his arm, her sharp gaze on where you held onto the crook of Sungchan’s elbow. The uncle continued introductions, “Jooie, dear, this is little Y/N’s boyfriend, uh, something Jungchan—”

“Jung Sungchan,” he swiftly corrected him, flashing a polite smile to the woman as well.

Jooeun wasn’t familiar to you whatsoever, she was definitely younger than you remember the uncle’s wife being when you last saw him over a decade ago now. New wife, you surmised.

“Wow…” She nodded, not saying anything else after trailing off.

“There you are, Y/N!” The familiar voice of your mother appeared at your side, obviously flustered as she hugged you just to lean in to say through gritted teeth, “You are late, young lady.”

“Hi, Mom,” you forced a smile in return, ending the disquieting hug as soon as possible.

“Oh, Sungchan!” She threw her arms around him next, her joy genuine this time.

“Hi, Ms. Y/L/N,” he robotically leaned down to hug her back. “I apologize for our tardiness, that was entirely my fault. I was late picking Y/N up and—”

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” she waved off his apology, patting his cheek with her hand that wasn’t holding a glass of wine. “The man’s dead, he’s not going anywhere.”

Sungchan smoothly removed himself from her grasp and wrapped his arm around you again. “Of course. Thank you. And I’m sorry for your loss.”

“So sweet, as always,” she laughed fondly. Turning to the other relatives, she explained, “Sungchan is one of the few things my daughter’s done right, I swear. I don’t know why he sticks around, honestly!”

“Excuse me—ladies’ room,” you mumbled under the laughter that had erupted from the entire circle (save for Sungchan), jerking yourself out of his warm grasp and into the crowd. You could feel bile rising in your throat as you searched blindly for a bathroom.

Slamming the bathroom door shut behind you in a far corner of the house, you tilted your head back as you took deep breaths, trying to keep your tears at bay. You didn’t even know the guy who died, crying at his wake would be fucking weird. Not to mention your mom would just make another snide comment about you being sensitive as always if she saw you like this. The more you thought about it, the harder it was to hold them back.

Once you’d somewhat composed yourself again, taking a tissue to dab at the corner of your eyes, you fanned your face, convincing yourself that your eyes weren’t that red, and unlocked the door. The house was eerily quiet, however, quieter than when you’d entered the bathroom, even accounting for the isolated corner that you were in. Mourners eyed you rather obviously as you walked by, whispering among themselves. Your skin prickled uncomfortably under their gazes.

Before you arrived at the front room that you’d left everyone else at, Sungchan found you, his head easy to spot over the crowd. He caught your elbow in a gentle grasp, ushering you in the direction you had just come from.

“Let’s step outside for a second,” he murmured to you, pushing the back door open.

The chill of winter was still present in the air as snowflakes had begun falling while you were inside. He immediately slipped his suit jacket off, draping it over your shoulders.

“What’s going on?” You asked him after the door had closed behind the two of you, watching as he started pacing in front of you.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” he sighed. “She’s always like that, isn’t she?”

“I’m sorry, she’s usually better in front of people, especially you; she just had too much to drink I think—”

“No, God, why are you apologizing for her being awful to you?” He ran a hand through his hair, clearly exasperated. “I’m sorry, I should’ve seen that sooner. It shouldn’t have had to happen right in front of my face for me to know. God, it was always right there, if I had just opened my stupid fucking eyes. I am so sorry.”

You dug your teeth out of your bottom lip, inhaling shakily. “I’m sorry—”

“You don’t need to apologize for her. She should be apologizing to you. They all should.”

“No, I’m apologizing for me. I… didn’t tell the whole truth when I broke up with you. I did need space, but I didn’t tell you why.” Your tears were freezing cold as they fell down your cheeks, but you didn’t bother wiping them. Your words finally paused Sungchan’s angry pacing, and he slowed to a stop to listen to you. “Imagine the best part of you being somebody else… I didn’t want my family’s expectations to make me hate you. I needed to… figure out how I felt about myself. But after, I couldn’t even tell them that we broke up. Because I-I didn’t want to disappoint them again, make them hate me even more for taking away the only part of me they liked: you.”

“Oh, Y/N…” He breathed out, face contorting in pain. “I’m sorry, for whatever I did that made you feel like you couldn’t tell me this before.”

“You were just trying to impress your girlfriend’s family and diffuse the tension, it’s understandable,” you sniffed, dabbing at your eyes with the sleeves of your sweater.

“No, I should’ve been defending you, on your side one hundred percent. I was your boyfriend, not theirs.”

“Can—” You pulled the suit jacket tighter around you as a gust of wind blew in snowflakes under the awning you were standing beneath. “I think I’d like to go home.”

“Yeah, let’s go.” Sungchan nodded in the direction of the side gate for the two of you to make a stealthy exit.

The back door opened then, and you didn’t even need to turn around to know who it was.

“Y/N! There you are!” Your mother was accompanied by the heating from inside the house continuously seeping out as she stood in the open doorway. “Brr! It’s cold. Get back in here and give Sungchan his coat back, sweetie, the poor dear has got to be freezing to death!”

“I gave it to her, and she’s keeping it,” Sungchan replied firmly, pointedly flipping up the collar of the jacket to protect your neck against the wind. “Thank the host for us, we’re leaving now.”

“Now?! But you just—”

“Now. Goodbye.” He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, ushering you away from her and towards the gate again.

“Y/N, I can’t believe you’re so ungrateful that you’re making Sungchan—” She had descended the short step from the house to the porch to grab your arm and try to halt your leaving.

Sungchan took her hand and removed it from your wrist, stepping in front of you and fully concealing you from her. “Apparently I wasn’t clear enough earlier. You’re the ungrateful one. You have a daughter who is kind enough to put up with your bullshit—Constantly dragging her out to places last minute and humiliating her in front of people to make yourself feel better. You should be ashamed to call yourself a parent. Honestly, I can’t believe that someone so kind, so incredibly down-to-Earth and considerate of others was raised by someone as cruel as you. So yes, we will be going, and I don’t want you to say another word to her while we do.”

He once again wrapped his arm around you, hurrying through the freshly fallen snow. Shoving the gate open, he continued marching you on down the street away from that house until the two of you were able to finally hail a taxi. Sungchan opened the door and guided you in first, and then firmly shut it behind you, giving your apartment address to the driver. He brushed the snowflakes from your hair and shoulders with rough but attentive hands, and you sat patiently as he did so. His entire face was red, and you weren’t sure if it was from the cold or not, as a vein bulged out on his forehead that usually wasn’t there.

“Thank you, Sungchan,” you muttered, scooting over until your sides were pressed together, then took one of his hands, lacing your fingers with his.

He squeezed your hand tightly, patting the back of it with his other hand. “I’ll do it again. As many times as you want me to, as many times as I have to.”

At your front door, Sungchan was still holding your hand as you approached with your key in your other hand. You turned to him hopefully, “Do you want to stay for dinner? We can watch a movie or something…”

“Of course. Whatever you want, Y/N,” he agreed.

Your apartment of course didn’t have pictures of you and Sungchan, you had moved in after the two of you broke up. He’d only caught glimpses of the inside the couple times he’d picked you up for your cousin’s wedding and the funeral today since then—this was the first time he was actually entering, and looked around with interest as he followed you towards your room.

“Cute place,” he commented.

“Thanks.” You rifled through your drawers to grab a couple specific items of clothing that you knew were deep in there. “Here.”

He looked down at the pair of sweatpants and graphic t-shirt you’d handed him, arching an eyebrow at you. “I thought you’d lost these…?”

“I meant to give them back,” you insisted half-heartedly.

“Really? When?”

“When they stopped being comfy…”

He laughed, landing a large hand on your head to pat your hair affectionately. “Oh, I’m sure.”

“What do you want to watch?” You asked, putting Sungchan’s plate of food on your coffee table and picking up the remote to turn the TV on. “Oh! I saw this documentary about yokai the other day that I think you’d like!”

“Really? Did you stay awake for the whole thing this time?” Sungchan teased as you opened the app on your TV.

“No, I didn’t watch because I thought you—” You cut yourself off. “I found something else. Do you want to watch it?”

“Sounds interesting,” he said, taking a big bite of his food. “Pull it up, if you think you can stay awake.”

“You know I like to fall asleep to documentaries on purpose because the narrators’ voices are relaxing,” you huffed. As you started searching it up, something occurred to you, and you turned to Sungchan with a thoughtful frown on your face. “Hey, why were you ready for a funeral so quick anyway?”

He pushed around some of his food with his utensil, not meeting your eyes. “Mm, Taro dragged me out on this double date thing…”

“Oh.”

He shrugged, then rubbed your back, letting his hand rest there. “I’m glad I bailed. Nowhere else I’d rather be. Honest.”

You leaned into his side, resting your head on his shoulder. “Thank you, Channie. There’s no one else I would’ve wanted with me today. Really.”

“This is us now, remember? Just weddings and funerals.”

“And the occasional sleepover,” you mused, clicking play on the documentary.

“And the occasional sleepover,” he echoed, pulling you closer and resting his head on yours.

That night, the two of you winded down after some very interesting documentaries—with you only beginning to nod off on Sungchan’s shoulder towards the end of the second one—working in quiet symbiosis to clean the dishes and tidy up. When you saw Sungchan start heading towards the couch, you felt a pull in your gut. Then, before you could think it through, the words were tumbling out of your mouth, something about how your couch was way too small for him to sleep comfortably. And after a beat of hesitation, of giving you time to backpedal if you wanted, he was following you down the hall towards your room.

The empty space between you felt insurmountable after you settled under the covers, like there was a whole ocean there instead of your duvet. You didn’t go to sleep wrapped up in Sungchan’s arms, or with your head in the crook of his neck, or with his hand gently carding through your hair like you used to. But as you closed your eyes and rolled onto your side away from him, trying to grasp at the thing that was poking out of your heart so you could finally pull it out, you at least got to go to sleep listening to his even breaths. And for right now, that meant everything.

“Do you think…” You handed Sungchan his cup of coffee in the morning, trying not to ruminate too much about how cute he looked with his bedhead. “Do you think we’ll ever…?”

He looked at you with an eyebrow raised as he slowly lifted the mug to his mouth and took a sip, then lowered it back down the counter. “Ever…?”

You pulled at the sleeves of your hoodie anxiously. “You know, get back together?”

He sighed, rubbing his eye with the heel of his palm. “Y/N…”

“I’m sorry, that was—”

“No, no, it’s fine,” he reassured you, taking another sip. “I just… Don’t you get it?”

“Get what?”

“I’m just waiting on you. To be ready, finally figure out how you feel about yourself. Until you want me back in your space again.”

“But I thought you were on a double date yesterday?”

“We hadn’t even gotten to the restaurant when you called. I didn’t know it was a date until Shotaro tried wrestling my phone from me when he saw it was you. That’s why I missed your call in the first place, by the way.”

Hot tears pricked at your eyes, but you couldn’t even pinpoint why you were crying this time. Sungchan stood up from the chair he had been sitting in at your kitchen table, crossing your kitchen in one long stride to wrap his arms around you and bring you into his chest. You buried your face in his shirt as you tried to get a handle on even a single thing you were thinking or feeling. He stroked the back of your head with a large hand, encouraging you to breathe. You wiped your eyes and looked up at Sungchan. His image wavered in your watery vision, but you could just make out that his eyes were teary, too. Your gaze flicked down to his mouth, swept up in being this close to him again, overwhelmed at how sweet he was, how perfect he was. Apparently reading your mind, he brushed some hair away from your face before leaning down to drop a fleeting kiss to your forehead.

He stepped back with a bittersweet smile pulling at his lips. “So that’s how you felt then.”

“I’m sorry,” you blubbered. “I’m not-I’m—”

“It’s okay,” he said quietly. “Take all the time you need.”

[jung yusung: attached image]

You blinked several times at the text notification that had just popped up at the top of your phone screen. Then it was followed by another.

[jung yusung: We didn’t have your address, so I’m just making sure you had this]

It was a wedding invite, for Sungchan’s brother’s wedding next month. You did technically still have it on your phone calendar, leftover from when you’d saved the date way back when it was announced while you were still dating Sungchan. As far as Yusung should be concerned, to your understanding, your address should be Sungchan’s address, and he already sent your invite months ago.

You dragging Sungchan to a distant cousin’s wedding was one thing, but Sungchan and his brother were quite close, and you had also become good friends with him and his fiancée in the time that you and Sungchan dated. It just felt wrong to lie to them.

Right as you had started typing your explanation to him, another text came through.

[jung yusung: Sungchan told us yesterday that you two broke up. We want you there because you’re family either way]

You immediately called Sungchan. It rang a few times before he picked up.

“Y/N?” His tone was clearly worried.

“Hey, Sungchan,” you smiled half-heartedly despite the fact that he couldn’t see it.

“Hey,” he replied, relieved presumably at the fact that it didn’t sound like you were actively crying. You imagined that he was smiling a little bit as well. “How are you?”

“I’m alright. How about you?”

“Good. Just uh, leaving a fitting, actually.”

“For your brother’s wedding?”

“Yeah, it’s coming up fast.”

“Next month.”

“Oh, you remember.”

“Actually, Sungchan, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about—”

“I’m glad you called, I need to tell you—”

“Me first?” You requested.

“Okay.”

“Why did you tell your family that we broke up?”

“You know.” He paused. “Uhm, because we did?”

Fair. “Yeah, but why now?”

He let out a deep sigh. “Ahh… I didn’t tell them at first, because I kind of didn’t want to believe it, and then I was ashamed. That I couldn’t keep the best thing that ever happened to me. Like, you said it wasn’t my fault, and I believed you, but I felt like if I told them, it would still look like that. That I failed somehow. I just didn’t want to deal with that. But after the last funeral, that whole thing with your mom… I couldn’t keep being selfish like that. Especially with Yusung and Hyesoo’s wedding coming up, they’d be expecting you and me there as a couple. It wouldn’t have been fair to you.”

“Thanks.”

“How do you know I finally told them?”

“Yusung told me,” you admitted, biting your cheek. “That’s why I’m calling. He personally re-invited me to the wedding, even though we’re not together. I wanted to talk to you about it, though. If it’s going to be weird for you, I won’t go.”

“No, Y/N,” he immediately replied. “I know you’re friends with Yusung and Hyesoo. They miss you and want you there, too.”

“You’re sure?”

“Absolutely. Weddings and funerals, right?”

“Right,” you confirmed.

“I’m going to get there early and have groomsman stuff to do, but uh, I’ll have Taro pick you up, okay?”

“Sounds good.”

“Great.”

Today was Yusung and Hyesoo’s wedding, and you were fixing your hair for maybe the fiftieth time in the bathroom mirror when your doorbell rang, followed by a series of peppy knocks. Rushing to grab your phone and purse, you opened it to greet your friend on the other side with a breathless smile.

“Taro, hi,” you hugged him. Shotaro had been the one to introduce you and Sungchan in the first place, a mutual friend, though you knew he and Sungchan were friends for years before you ever met.

“Hey, Y/N,” Shotaro squeezed you back. “How you been?”

“Oh, good.” You shuffled out and locked your front door behind you. “How about you?”

“Same old.” He shrugged, grinned, and spun his keys around his finger. “Ready to go?”

“Yep!”

The ceremony hadn’t started yet, people were still milling around, chatting, and finding seats. Taking your seats to one side of the aisle, you anxiously smoothed over your clothes as you tried not to feel like you were intruding. Yusung had personally invited you despite everything. You were here to support your friends.

“Relax, Y/N,” Taro had apparently sensed your nerves, flashing you another smile. “You’re not the one getting married.”

“I know, I know,” you laughed, flexing your fingers in your lap to try to get out some of the nervous tension. “Thank you, by the way.”

“For anything specific, or…?”

“Taking Sungchan on that double date. Or, at least trying to.” At your friend’s skeptical look, you added, “Really, I didn’t want him to stare at a wall the whole time or something. I wanted him to keep being him.”

“I did have to trick him, he wouldn’t have said yes if he knew it was a date,” he informed you with a sigh.

“I did hear about that…”

“I don’t know your whole situation, and you don’t have to tell me. I’m sure you needed the space,” he lowered his voice and scooted in towards you as to not broadcast your conversation to every other person sitting around you. “But… Sungchan isn’t the same as before. He’s never going to be the same again. Whether or not you two get back together, he can’t just go back to how he was. And I don’t think he wants to.”

“I feel the same way,” you admitted, glancing over to where Sungchan and the other groomsmen were waiting at the end of the aisle. He caught your gaze, and his features were immediately overtaken by a big smile. You smiled and lifted your hand in a small wave back. “Loving Sungchan and being loved by him, it’s the kind of thing that changes you.”

“I didn’t take him on that date because I hate you or think that you’re not good together.”

“I didn’t think you did.” You tilted your head curiously. “So why did you?”

“Because Sungchan’s fatal flaw when it comes to you is that he wants you to be happy, no matter the detriment to him or to you.” He shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest. “From what he’s told me, I don’t think you guys should’ve even broken up in the first place. He didn’t put up a fight at all, did he?”

“No, he was really understanding.”

“Idiots. The both of you. Him, for not trying to get you to talk about it first, and you for thinking he would just be the same old Sungchan like nothing happened.” He scoffed. “I mean, do you even know him?”

You took his seemingly harsh words in stride, knowing that your usually bright and cheery friend didn’t get this upset unless he really cared. “You took him on that date, and tried to take his phone so he couldn’t pick up my phone to… force him into fighting for our relationship?”

“Giving me a bit too much credit there, maybe,” Shotaro let out a chuckle. “It’s like you said. He was stuck, waiting around for you. I wanted him to do something. Either move on, or go get you back.”

Your eyes strayed to Sungchan again, fixing his tie and adjusting the finer points of his suit. Another groomsman said something to him, to which he laughed, and you felt your heart lurch.

The ceremony was incredible. You felt yourself tearing up a little with how happy you were for your friends. They shared their first kiss, and giddily half-ran back down the aisle. The rest of the wedding party filed out after them, and you caught Sungchan’s eye again then, smiling and waving. He waved back, absolutely beaming.

At the reception, there were no assigned seats save for the wedding party’s table, so you and Shotaro ended up at a table of people you learned to be college friends of the couple. You sat through the various toasts, including Sungchan’s, and were finally left to eat and chat in peace.

“Y/N!” A hand gently rested on your shoulder, and you wiped at your mouth before turning around. It was Sungchan’s mother, and you eagerly greeted her as she bent down to hug you. “Oh, I thought that was you.”

“Hi, yes. How are you?” You accepted the hug from her husband as well.

“We’re well.” She still looked absolutely stupefied, like she couldn’t believe that you were real. “Both boys said you were coming, but still…”

“Yusung and Hyesoo invited me,” you smiled awkwardly. “Again…”

“I’m glad to see you, sweetheart,” she sighed wistfully, patting your cheek, then turned to your friend. “And you too, Taro.”

“I thought I was invisible for a second!” He huffed in feigned exasperation, standing up to give both parents hugs, making everyone laugh.

“Our third son could wait for a moment,” Mr. Jung teased back.

“Forgotten middle child as always,” he tsked and shook his head.

As they moved to chat with the other guests at your table, Shotaro nudged your arm and nodded towards the wedding party table, which was relatively vacant as many were off mingling. “Do you want to go give our congrats to the bride and groom?”

“Sure, yeah.” You nodded, accepting his hand up.

Approaching the table, you saw it disappointingly devoid of Sungchan, but still beamed at your friends as you arrived.

“Y/N! Shotaro!” Hyesoo squealed and got to her feet to wrap the both of you in tight hugs. “Hi!”

“Congrats!” You laughed and hugged her back, careful to avoid bumping the tiara/veil on her head. “How does it feel?”

“Awesome,” Yusung gushed, hugging you next once his wife had let you go. “How are you doing, Y/N?”

“I’m good, really,” you assured him. “Thank you.”

“My brother’s around here somewhere—” He got on his tiptoes to try to peer around the venue.

“Don’t worry about our problems. Today’s your wedding, seriously,” you waved him off with a laugh, trying to pull him back down to flat feet. “You don’t have to be big brother for one day.”

“Can’t, sorry. No off switch.”

You shook your head, despite your smile, “I know, I know.”

After a bit more chit chatting about their wedding—the venue, the food, Hyesoo’s dress, the decorations, a debacle with the florist—you and Shotaro excused yourself to let the next guests that were hanging around nearby have a chance to talk to the couple. It was then that Sungchan finally found the two of you, having shed his suit jacket at some point as he loosened his tie and fanned himself with his dress shirt.

“Hey, guys, are you having a good time?” He asked, clearly out of breath.

“Yeah, man, are you?” Shotaro laughed incredulously.

“You look like you’re about to have a stroke, Channie,” you pressed the back of your fingers to his pink cheek, furrowing your brow when you felt how warm he was. Grabbing his arm, you pulled him over to the drinks table. “When was the last time you drank water?”

“This morning? Maybe?” He scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. “Definitely at the rehearsal dinner. Last night.”

You grabbed a cup and filled it up from the ice-cold jug clearly label ‘water’ in a fancy cursive font. Pushing it into his hand, you said sternly, “Drink some. Now.”

He gulped down the first cup obediently, and you immediately refilled it before handing it back to him. “Thanks, Y/N.”

“Was the whole building about to collapse or something?” Shotaro asked. “You looked freaked.”

“No, just felt like it,” he chuckled, taking another long swig of water. “But everything’s fine now.”

“Good, I’m glad.” You squeezed his arm.

“I’m uh—I’m going to go use the bathroom,” your friend announced loudly. “Then maybe talk to some people. For a long time.”

“Oh, really subtle, Taro,” Sungchan snorted.

“As a freight train,” you agreed, watching him click his tongue, snap his fingers at the both of you, and saunter off.

“Thank you for coming,” Sungchan said. “Really, you—It’s good to see you again.”

“I’m glad I came,” you smiled up at him, fixing his rumpled collar for him. “You looked good up there, Channie.”

“The wonders that a tailored suit will do.”

“I can’t believe that you have two suits now.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s called character development?”

You laughed, maybe harder than his joke warranted, but you couldn’t help the bubbly feeling in your chest from being back around Sungchan again. You hadn’t felt this happy since the last time you were with him.

He had a fond smile on his face as he watched you. “You look beautiful, by the way.”

“Oh, thank you.” You messed with your own outfit bashfully.

“If I can say that…?”

“Yes, Sungchan, you can compliment me,” you laughed, pushing on his shoulder.

He let himself be jostled a little bit as he grinned at you. “Just making sure.”

Still with a tug at the corner of your mouth, you caught his eye, and slipped your hand into his.

“It’s your brother’s wedding, and you seem stressed enough,” you breathed out hesitantly. “We obviously don’t have to talk today. But I’m ready.”

For a stomach-dropping second, he froze. Then his hand was tightening around yours and he was pulling you away from the drinks table, through the crowd, out the back door of the room, and down the halls at a dizzying pace that you could barely keep up with. You didn’t know where you were until the cool nighttime air hit your skin. Stars dotted the inky sky, and it took you a few moments after your eyes had adjusted to the darkness to realize that you were back at the courtyard where the outdoor ceremony had taken place, nothing but the arch of flowers left.

Each of you just looked at the other for a few silent moments. You gulped, the sound comically loud in your ears. You got the two of you into this mess, it was only right that you should go first.

“I-I’m so sorry, Channie,” you began, clasping his hand desperately. “I did let my family get to me, and instead of talking to you, I ran away from you. I’m sorry.”

“I forgive you. And…” He grabbed your other hand too. “I’m sorry I just let things pass me by. Your family treating you like that, our relationship. Me not doing anything because I didn’t want to fight… that wasn’t fair to either of us.”

“I forgive you, too,” you sniffled, feeling the tears rising up faster than you could stop them.

“So, you’re really ready to try for more than just wedding and funerals?”

“Absolutely,” you smiled and wiped at your eyes. “We can’t really attend anything hosted by my family anymore, so we need some new date ideas anyway.”

“Wait what?”

“After the last funeral, you and I are sort of banned from all future Y/L/N family events until we apologize. Per my mother,” you admitted.

Sungchan’s eyes widened. “Y/N, oh shit, I’m so—”

“Don’t. They don’t deserve an apology from either of us,” you reassured him, cupping his cheek. “I missed you so bad, Sungchan.”

He wrapped his arms around you, holding you tight to him as he buried his face in your neck. “God, I missed you too, baby.”

You hugged him back, feeling the painful knots that had been ensnared around your chest for months now unravel.

“Do-Do you think we should go back in?” You murmured.

“Probably…” He sighed, not loosening his grip on you. “We probably missed their first dance.”

A crack of thunder made you jump out of your skin, and you felt Sungchan startle in your arms as well. You looked up at the sky, putting a hand over your heart as you could feel your heartbeat racing, “Fuck, that scared the hell out of me.”

The words were barely out of your mouth when a drop of water hit your arm. Then another. Then it was absolutely pouring, and both you and Sungchan were soaked in seconds, before you could even head for shelter. You looked at each other is disbelief.

“Well… shit,” you sputtered out a chuckle, looking down at your drenched clothes.

“I think we’d be a slipping hazard on the dance floor at this point,” Sungchan laughed, pushing his wet hair from his face as he looked up into the rain. “Kind of feels nice, though.”

“Hm.”

You threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his neck. He managed to catch you, letting out a chuckle as he stumbled back a step. The sounds of the rain hitting the stones underfoot filled your ears as he enveloped you in his warm arms. Sungchan began to sway the two of you to a simple beat, humming under his breath as he rested his cheek on your hair.

“Channie?”

“Baby?”

You looked up at him, cupping his cheek. Your eyes followed a drop of water as it ran down his nose and dripped off. Sungchan covered your palm with his before leaning down and pressing your lips together. You grabbed his tie to pull him even closer as his other hand settled on your lower back, fingertips pressing you into him.

“Shh,” Sungchan tried to quiet your laughs, before immediately giggling himself.

The rain had eventually let up, but the two of you were unfortunately still quite damp by the time you finally reentered the venue. You had wrung out what water you could to avoid dripping all over the place, but it was quite obvious where you two had been.

“You shush!” You hissed back, pinching his arm that you were holding.

“I just need to get my phone and my keys and my jacket, and your purse, and we can go,” he reiterated the plan. “I might have a couple towels in my car, so you don’t have to sit on a wet seat.”

The upbeat music had gotten louder the nearer you were to the main room, and the two of you stopped at the entrance to look around. A few other guests had already left, you could tell, and most were congregated on the dance floor, engrossed among themselves.

“Wait here,” Sungchan whispered, squeezing your hand before taking off.

You hung back at the entrance, trying to make yourself as invisible as possible and avoiding anybody’s gaze.

“Oh my god, Y/N!” Hyesoo had appeared seemingly out of nowhere, unaccompanied by her husband or anybody else. She gasped as she took in your drenched appearance. “What happened?”

“Nothing, just stepped outside for a second and got stuck in the rain,” you tried to assuage her concerns. “I’m going to head out though, don’t want to drip all over the place, you know?”

“Oh, you poor thing.” She tried to usher you down the hall. “Here, we have stuff at the bridal suite. Where was Sungchan? Or Shotaro? Why did they leave you alone?”

You tried to politely decline and stay put. “It’s fine, Hyesoo, really. Thank you, but it’s late. I was going to head out soon anyway.”

A familiar laugh came from behind you, and both you and Hyesoo turned to look. It was Shotaro, toting the similarly damp Sungchan with him. Sungchan had his suit jacket, phone and keys in one hand, and in the other, which Shotaro had the wrist of, was your purse. Shotaro must have been back at your table and caught him when he went to retrieve it for you.

“Knew it,” Shotaro was still laughing. “Fuckin’ knew it.”

Hyesoo looked between you and Sungchan, her expression changing from that of worry and pity to a knowing smile. She didn’t outright laugh like your other friend, simply letting go of your elbow and stepping back next to Shotaro. “Gotcha. Thank you for coming, Y/N, Sungchan.”

“Congrats again,” you squeezed your friend’s hand. “Give Yusung my best too.”

“I will be telling Yusung. For sure,” she giggled.

“Bye, Hyesoo,” Sungchan shook his head, but nevertheless pecked his sister-in-law on the cheek. “Tell Yusung we said bye.”

“See you, Taro!” You waved to him over your shoulder as Sungchan had already started escorting you out.

“Buh-bye!” Shotaro waved back zealously.

Sungchan fetched the promised two towels from his backseat, a little rumpled, and immediately tried to use both of them to dry you off. You took one from him to run over his hair and press against the wettest part of his clothes. He put his dry suit jacket on your shoulders and opened the passenger door for you, laying the towel down on the seat. You pulled him in for one more sweet kiss before getting in.

Sungchan got in with his own towel wrapped around his waist, then started the car. He immediately cranked up the heat, which you were grateful for, rubbing at the goosebumps on your skin.

“Hey,” he called for you softly.

You immediately looked over at him, finding him already gazing at you with the most tender smile on his face as he reached for your hand to hold it over the center console.

“I missed you.”

You kissed the back of his hand. “Thank you, Channie. For not giving up on me.”

“Thank you for not giving up on me either.” He kissed your forehead. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

⤷ masterlist

[luigisprincessdaisy]

"𝑭𝑰𝑹𝑺𝑻 𝑻𝑶𝑼𝑪𝑯𝑬𝑺" 𝑴.𝑺 :

❥ 𝑺𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 : 𝑴𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒔𝒕 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒃𝒇, 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉 𝒎𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒔𝒕 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈, 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒅𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒚 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒊𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈.

❥ 𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 : 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒔 𝒗𝒊𝒓𝒈𝒊𝒏 𝒂𝒕 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒔𝒕, 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒅 𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒅, 𝒔𝒎𝒖𝒕 𝒐𝒃𝒗, 𝒑𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒌 + 𝒅𝒆𝒈𝒓𝒂𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒌, 𝒃𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒌, 𝒔𝒑𝒊𝒕 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒌, 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒌𝒚 𝒂𝒔𝒇, 𝒋𝒆𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒚, 𝒕𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈(?), 𝑴𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒌𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑪𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒔 𝒚/𝒏, 𝒊𝒅𝒌 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒆𝒍𝒔𝒆 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒎𝒆 𝒊𝒇 𝒊 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 :3

❥ 𝑨𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆 : 𝒊𝒎 𝒃𝒖𝒍𝒈𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒂𝒏 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒅𝒚𝒔𝒍𝒆𝒙𝒊𝒄 𝒔𝒐 𝒊𝒎 𝒔𝒐𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝒋𝒇 𝒊 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈, 𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒅𝒐 𝒎𝒚 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒆-𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈.

༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻

You and Matt have been dating for almost 5 months, the most far you two had gone, was making out and grinding into each other, never anything else

You are staying over Matt's, of course he doesn't live alone, his brothers and he live together. But they don't mind your presence, so youre generally staying at theirs

The three of them were done with filming a video for their YouTube channel, it was night and while they were out filming you decided to take a shower then made them something to eat, almost 2 hours later Matt and his brothers got back, you were sitting in the couch, in the living room.

Matt immediately came to you "Hi" he said smiling

"Hi to you too" you answered shyly "I made you guys something to eat by the way.."

"You didn't had to baby, but thank you" he leaned in, to kiss you in the forehead

"Yeah y/n/n thank you" Nick and Chris said at the same time

"Chris let's eat" Nick said, both of them leading into the kitchen.

"Matt go eat" you said, smiling up at your boyfriend

"We actually ate, but they are hungry again..not me tho"

"You sure babe?"

"Yes my love" he replied honestly "do you wanna come upstairs, I need to take a shower then we can watch a movie or something?" He asked you

"Oh sure, alright." You nodded slightly, with a smile.

"Come on-" he took your hand, and you stood up from the couch. "Let's go" he continued, leading you to his room.

After you two got to his room, he closed the door behind him, and starting to pick up some pajamas "you can choose a movie if you want baby" Matt said, while coming to you so he can kiss you quickly..

"Okay" you nodded, after he got in the bathroom, and after you heard the water turning on. You started wondering if you should choose a movie or stick with your plan

You're 19 and still virgin, its not embarrassing for you but you wanted to finally do it, with your boyfriend. You trust him more than anyone else.

After 20 minutes of wondering, you decided that you want to do it, of course only if he wants to. You'll not force him if he's not in the mood for it.

After 10 more minutes you heard the shower turning off, moments later Matt came inside the room. Only in a pair of shorts, his hair still wet

"Hi baby..did you choose or?"

"No Matt..I uh-i don't know how to tell you but-"

"Did I do something? If I did I'm so sorr-" asked worried

"No-no matt! You haven't done anything baby..I-"

"Spit it out angel" he demanded you.

"You-you know I'm a..I'm a virgin" you said, blushing feeling embarrassed now "if you're in the mood, I want you..to take my virginity.." you continued, fidgeting with your fingers and not daring to look up at Matt

"Are you sure sweet girl?" He asked you, coming closer to you, and sitting on the bed. "You really want me to?"

"Yeah Matty..but only if you want-" you said looking up at him quickly

"Of course I want to, I want to make you feel good." He said quietly but his voice full of lust.

"Well..uh, when and how should we s-start?" You said, breathing shakily

"Take off your shirt and lay down." You did as he told you to, taking off your shirt and laying down on his bed.

"N-now?" You asked curiously.

"Shh, let me lead now..is it okay if I took these off?-" he pulled the waistband of your shorts "hm pretty?" He continued

"Y-yeah, please do." You nodded, faster than you intended to, which Matt chuckled at.

He started pulling down your shorts, you lifted up your hips to help him, after he was done he tossed them on the floor. Leaning down between your thighs, hooking his arms between your plush thighs and spreading your legs, he looked up at you for permission

You nodded at that, whispering an "yes"

After your answer, he looked at your covered pussy, he kissed your clit through your lace panties, you shuddered at the feeling. And then he suddenly ripped them out and throwing them behind him, and on the floor.

"Can I continue baby hm?" You nodded at that "Please matt.."

He leaned down to your now fully exposed cunt, he runned his middle finger through your embarrassingly wet folds

"So wet, that all for me hmm?" He asked teasingly

"A-all for you Matty.." He chuckled at that, and suddenly licked a stripe from down to your hole and up to your clit, you moaned out from that. Which made Matt to pull back

"Shh pretty, after all Chris and Nick are still here. Yeah?" You nodded at that, putting your hand over your mouth

"Good fucking girl" he groaned close to your pussy, and started licking again, you whimpered

Your mouth still covered by your hand, you suddenly let out a cry when he sucked on your clit, out of the blue.

"M-matt!!" You moaned out, which made Matt to pull back and slap your clit "be quite..for now"

You whined slightly at this action, Matt started suckling on your clit hard which made you cry out, but you quickly covered your mouth with your hand.

You felt the mattress below you, starting to move, you looked down. And saw Matt humping the mattress

Eating you out gave him more pleasure, than it did to you, he then moved his tongue to your hole. Pushing it inside and starting to tongue fuck you

You tried not to moan loudly, for the sake of his brothers, you felt your stomach tightening and you know what it was

After all you did touched yourself, "M-matt! I'm gonna-" you whimpered, which made him to pull his tongue out and lick over your slick slit

And he started shaking his head, the action making you moan out, "Matt! Oh fu-" you suddenly came, hard. But he continued

You whined from the stimulation

"Sens-sensetive matt..no more" you whimpered

He pulled back, looking up at you from between your thighs, the sight making you blush hardly

"Too sensitive huh?" He asked, his voice slightly raspy.

"Uhhuh" you nodded

He licked his lips, and went over you. Grabbing you by your face, and kissing you

You moaned at the taste of your juices from his mouth

He pulled away slightly and whispered

"Open" he demanded, and you opened your mouth

Then he spat on your tongue, you made a sound at that

"Swallow" you obeyed, swallowing his saliva.

"Good girl, baby, you're so good to me." He smiled at you

You felt your heart going warm at his praises

"I-im ready.." You said, blushing.

"Good baby, don't worry I'll go slow" he said, then kicking his pants and boxers away

He grabbed you by your cheeks, kissing you hungrily.

You whimpered into his mouth

"I'll push now, okay? I'll go nice and slow baby, I promise you." He calmed you down

And you nodded "please Matty.. I need to feel you"

"You will angel, don't worry" he said, then he grabbed his dick, he didn't needed to jerk of so he can get fully hard

He was already, painfully hard. He started rubbing his dick up and down to your slit

You whined from the feeling

"Pl-please matt!" You begged him

"Shh, I said nice and slow y/n, don't be a needy slut."

The way he degraded and praised you at the same time, made you feel tingly.

He continued rubbing his dick up and down, collecting your wetness and slick cum from your previous climax, after he made sure you were wet enough from his pre-cum and your juices

He looked at you "I'll push now."

"Please.." You nodded

He looked down, and spread your legs further. Pushing inside of you slowly

You whined from the stretch, he then pushed in his whole tip at once, which made you close your eyes and hiss

"You good baby?" He asked you, slightly worried.

"Y-yeah..keep going please"

He waited a little bit, then started pushing his whole dick inside. After he finally bottomed out be groaned at you tightness

"F-fuck, so tight and warm baby" he moaned slightly

"Oh M-matt" you whined from the feeling

He waited for five seconds then pulled out, but his tip still inside of you.

He looked down, watching the blood from your broken hymen coating his shaft. He groaned at the sight

"Pl-please move Matt!" You whined out, needing to feel his dick inside you

"Greedy whore" he spanked your ass slightly

Then he started to push inside of your gummy walls, once again, this time harsher.

"Oh g-god" you moaned softly, closing your eyes

"Eyes open bitch" he grabbed your face with one hand, squeezing so he can push your cheeks together

You opened your eyes, looking at his blue ones, now almost completely black from the lust

He sucked in his cheeks slightly, as to collect saliva

Then he suddenly spat on your face

The action making you whimper

"Good girl baby" he praised you after his "dirty" action

He started snapping his hips faster into yours

"Can you take it, if I move faster huh?" He asked you

"Y-yeah, please move" you looked at him, eyes glossy from the tears from pleasure

"Good" he then started pushing in and out harder and faster, only his tip inside of you.

He grabbed your plush thighs, pushing your legs to your ears.

He fucked his hard dick into your slick walls with an almost, animalistic force now

"Ma-nghh Matt!" The sounds you let out were so unholy, at thus point you didn't tried to stay quiet

"Such a slut, screaming like a whore while my brothers are here huh? Gonna make Chris jealous baby"

You whined at that, now trying to stay quiet.

"Bet you want him too huh? The way he looks at you, he. wants. you." The last three words were said while he was thrusting into your tight cunt

"N-no matt" you shaked your head

"No? You sure"

"I do-dont want him" you struggled to talk, his dick making you dumb and cock drunk

"Who makes you feel good? Is it Chris?" He asked while snapping his hips into yours roughly

"Y-you! Not fuck-not Chris!!" You said, a little too loud, you wouldn't be surprised if his brothers heard you.

"That's right baby, me, only me!" His thrusts getting sloppy, which means he's close

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, your mouth open with your tongue out, Matt enjoyed your fucked-out expression.

"C-nghhh cumming!" You moaned out loudly

"Go on, cream on my cock," and you did, your warm juices gushing out of you and into his cock and on the ruined bed sheets.

"Fuck! That's right baby, good girl, gonna cum deep into you"

You panted like a dog in heat, nodding your head.

"Gonna give you my baby, you will take my cum like a good little whore, right?"

"Y-yess matt please!" You whimpered, too sensitive and fucked out to think of the consequences

"F-fuck I'm cumming baby" Matt groaned, thrusting into you five more times before filling you up, with his warm cum.

You moaned out from the feeling, never felt this, it made you tingly.

He stayed inside a few minutes, before pulling out slowly, you and him both, whimpered when he did it.

"Are you okay babe?" Matt asked you, standing up going to the bathroom to take a wet wash cloth, cleaning himself and then coming to clean you up.

Your hips jerked when he started cleaning you

"Sensitive baby?" He teased you

"Mhm" you nodded, not being able to say something.

After he was done cleaning you, he dressed you with new pair of panties and some shorts of his

After you were done, he dressed himself too, still shirtless.

"Wanna sleep" you whispered

"Okay baby, we will." He chuckled slightly

༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻ ༺୨♥︎୧༻

[the-winter-spider]

Say Don't Go | Part 5

Bucky x reader

Word Count: 3.7k

Warnings: Angst, swearing, violence

A/N: I figured I should put part 5 out early because i feel bad for the mix up i did with the parts last night 🫶🏻

Masterpost

---

You sit in the quiet office, the faint hum of the rink beyond the door only amplifying the deafening silence in your head. Bucky’s laughter and the cruel words you overheard replay on an endless loop, cutting deeper every time. Your back presses against the desk, your legs shaky as you reach for the lock. The soft click of the bolt sliding into place feels like a feeble shield against the chaos threatening to consume you.

For a moment, you just stand there, staring blankly at the papers scattered across the desk. Your chest rises and falls unevenly as you try to push back the tightness in your throat. Tears sting at the corners of your eyes, but you refuse to let them fall. Not here. Not now. You’ve always been good at compartmentalizing, at shoving everything into a box in the back of your mind and sealing it shut. This moment will be no different.

With trembling hands, you grab the clipboard, flipping through the practice schedule as if it holds the answers to your unraveling thoughts. You move on autopilot, sorting paperwork, organizing tasks for later, going over all the shots you need for later, clinging to the routine as though it can steady you. The motions help, but only slightly. The ache in your chest refuses to ease, no matter how many times you tell yourself to breathe.

Your phone buzzes on the desk, the sharp vibration breaking the heavy silence. You glance at the screen, Steve’s name lighting up in bold letters.

S: Hey, gave Natasha your number. She just went to the washroom. Also, where are you? I got a couple minutes before I have to get on the ice—hurry!

You take a shaky breath and type back: Office. Almost done here.

The phone buzzes again before you can set it down. This time, it’s an unknown number.

Unknown: Where are you?

You know who it is without even thinking. Your fingers hover over the screen before you type: The office.

Unknown: OMW.

You exhale softly, the weight in your chest shifting slightly as you unlock the door just as Natasha steps in. Her sharp gaze sweeps the room, instantly locking on your face.

“What are you doing in here?” she asks, her tone more curious than accusing.

“Nothing,” you reply, too quickly. You shuffle papers around as though you’ve been deep in work. “Just catching up on some things. I’ll head out to the stands later to grab pictures for socials.”

Natasha crosses her arms, her eyes narrowing slightly. “Aren’t you usually out there for the whole practice? You know, for all the pre-action shots?”

You shrug, trying to sound casual. “I can miss one half of practice. I’ll just go out at the end for the important stuff.”

Her brows knit together, and she leans against the doorframe, studying you. “Everything okay?” she asks, her voice softer now, concern lacing her words.

“Yeah, totally,” you say, forcing a smile. It’s the kind of smile you’ve perfected over the years—wide enough to seem real but not enough to fool someone like Natasha. You pick up your camera, fiddling with the strap. “Nothing to worry about.”

She doesn’t push, though you can tell she doesn’t believe you. Instead, she walks over and perches on the edge of the desk. “Alright,” she says lightly. “But you know, if you ever want to talk, I know we barely know each other but I’m here.”

The sincerity in her voice nearly cracks the wall you’ve built, but you nod quickly, not trusting yourself to say anything else. “Thanks,” you manage, your voice barely above a whisper.

Eventually, you shove the paperwork into a folder, eager to escape the suffocating stillness of the office. “You coming with me?” you ask, glancing at Natasha.

“Of course,” she says with a small smile. She loops her arm through yours as the two of you step out into the rink. Despite the ache still weighing you down, her warmth feels comforting. For a fleeting moment, you’re reminded of how rare and precious this budding friendship is. It’s always been you and Steve, and you’ll always be grateful for that, but this is different—something you’ve been missing without realizing it.

The sharp sound of skates cutting across the ice fills the air, grounding you in the familiar atmosphere of the rink. You immediately spot Bucky. His effortless movements, the way his broad shoulders shift with each turn, draw your eyes like a magnet.

Your breath hitches when his gaze meets yours. He offers you a smile, easy and warm, and the ache in your chest sharpens. You hate how your heart flutters, even now, after everything.

“Hey,” Natasha says, gently nudging your arm. “Snap out of it.”

You blink, realizing you’ve stopped in your tracks. Natasha tilts her head, her expression cautious but knowing. “Have you talked to him yet?”

You shake your head, gripping your camera tightly. “No,” you say, your voice barely audible.

Natasha sighs, but she doesn’t press. Instead, she sits beside you on the stands as you adjust your camera, focusing the lens on the team below. The steady click of the shutter becomes your anchor, each snap a momentary distraction from the storm swirling in your chest. But no matter how much you try to lose yourself in the task, you can still feel his gaze on you, burning through the lens, making it impossible to ignore the weight of everything unsaid.

---

Natasha stops just before stepping onto the stairs leading down to the ice, turning back to you with a sharp gaze. “You coming to wish Steve good luck? You always do. He calls you his good luck charm.” She smiles, trying to lift your mood.

Your stomach twists at her words. You stare at your shoes, your fingers gripping your camera strap tightly. “I think I’ll skip it this time,” you murmur. “It’s just one game—it’ll be fine.”

Her eyes narrow, and you can feel her studying you, her sharp instincts zeroing in like a laser. “Okay,” she says slowly, clearly unconvinced. “This is more than just skipping photos or not wishing Steve good luck. Did something else happen?”

The air feels heavier, your chest tightens, and your throat constricts. “Nothing,” you mumble, avoiding her piercing gaze. “I’m fine.”

Natasha crosses her arms, her jaw tightening with determination. “Alright,” she says, her voice leaving no room for argument. Before you can protest, she grabs your arm, not harshly but firmly enough to let you know she’s not letting this slide. “We’re talking. Now.”

She pulls you toward the girls’ locker room, and the sharp sound of the door locking behind her makes you flinch. The quiet of the room is deafening, and Natasha spins to face you, hands on her hips, her expression set like stone. “Spill.”

Your chest rises and falls with uneven breaths as you fight the lump building in your throat. Tears sting at the corners of your eyes, and no matter how much you try to push them down, they spill over. You take a shaky breath, your voice cracking as you finally say, “I… I heard them in the locker room.”

Her brows furrow, her expression softening with concern. “Who? What did you hear?” she presses gently.

“Bucky,” you whisper, your voice trembling. “Their teammates. They… they were laughing about the picture.” You swallow hard, each word dragging out of you painfully. “He said I was easy. That it meant nothing. He laughed with them, made stupid jokes with them about me.”

Natasha’s eyes widen, the softness vanishing in an instant, replaced by a storm of fury. Her jaw tightens, and her fists clench at her sides. “What?” she snaps, her voice low and sharp. “He said that?”

You nod, wiping at your tears furiously as though erasing them could make the situation less humiliating. “I should’ve known better,” you say, your voice barely above a whisper. “But it’s Bucky. He’s been so kind all year, gone out of his way to… I thought he cared, I thought he was different, one of the good ones, god I'm so fucking stupid."

Natasha’s face hardens, and she looks like she’s ready to tear through the locker room door. “I’m gonna kill him,” she growls, already turning.

“No, no, no!” you plead, grabbing her arm with both hands and holding her back. “Please, don’t. It'll just make it worse.”

She freezes but glares at the door, her fury simmering just beneath the surface. “You have to tell Steve,” she says firmly. “He’ll want to know.."

You shake your head violently, your breath hitching as more tears spill over. “I can’t,” you whisper. “It’ll crush him. Bucky’s one of his best friends…He just picked him to be the assistant Captain.... I know he loved having a guy friend, I don't want to take that from him.....I just… I can’t handle this right now.”

Natasha takes a deep breath, running a hand through her hair as she processes your words. Finally, she exhales sharply. “Fine,” she says, her tone softening slightly. “Okay....but you can’t keep this bottled up forever, you know that, right?”

You nod faintly, clutching your camera like it’s a lifeline. “I just want to do my job,” you say, your voice trembling with desperation. “That’s all.”

Her lips press into a thin line, and she brushes her hand over your arm in a comforting gesture. “Why don’t we stay here until the game starts?” she suggests. “I’ll be right back—I just need to wish Steve good luck.”

“Send my luck to him too,” you manage to say softly.

Natasha nods, her eyes lingering on you for a moment before she leaves, the door clicking shut behind her. Left alone in the quiet room, you let out a shaky breath and sit down on the bench, your body trembling as you try to collect yourself.

You pull out your camera, focusing on transferring the photos to your phone. The task feels mechanical, something to occupy your hands and drown out your thoughts. But no matter how hard you try, the sting of Bucky’s words keeps echoing in your head.

Your phone buzzes, breaking your focus. You glance at the screen and freeze when you see his name.

Bucky: Hey, where are you? Are you okay?

Your throat tightens as fresh tears well in your eyes. You stare at the message, your hands trembling as you fight the urge to respond. Instead, you cough softly, trying to clear the lump in your throat, and set your phone down beside you, ignoring the message entirely.

Focusing back on the photos, you swipe through them, editing as best as you can with unsteady fingers. But no matter how much you try to distract yourself, the ache in your chest remains, raw and relentless, as the weight of everything threatens to overwhelm you all over again.

---

The locker room buzzed with pre-game energy, the air thick with the smell of sweat and adrenaline. Laughter and shouts echoed off the walls as the guys hyped each other up, their sticks tapping against the floor in rhythm. But amidst the chaos, Steve stood like a statue, his face set in stone. His mind wasn’t on the game—it hadn’t been for hours.

“Buck, a word.” he called out, his tone sharp and cutting through the noise like a knife.

The room fell quiet almost immediately. Heads turned, wide eyes watching the Captain call out his teammate. A few of the guys exchanged amused smirks, one even whistling low under his breath, but Steve’s icy glare shut them up fast. Bucky, standing by his locker, raised a brow but didn’t argue. He slung his stick over his shoulder and followed Steve without a word, his skates clicking softly against the floor.

Steve led him to the office and closed the door behind them with a firm click. For a moment, he leaned against it, exhaling sharply, as if trying to steady himself. When he turned, his hands were on his hips, and his jaw was tight.

“What’s this about, Cap?” Bucky asked, though there was a hint of unease in his voice, the usual cockiness nowhere to be found.

Steve didn’t waste time. “You saw the picture,” he said bluntly, his voice low and sharp. “You knew about it, and you didn’t do anything.”

Bucky sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Steve, I didn’t even know about the picture until it got sent around today. I swear, as soon as I saw it, I’ve been trying to figure out who took it.”

Steve’s arms folded tightly across his chest, his blue eyes boring into Bucky. “So you just didn't try to find her? To talk to her about it? All day?”

Bucky’s jaw tightened, and he looked away for a moment, guilt flickering across his face. “Look, I tried to find her earlier. She wasn’t anywhere, and I texted her, but she hasn’t responded. I didn’t mean for this to happen, Steve.” His voice softened, his blue eyes meeting Steve’s. “She’s not just some… one-night stand to me. You know that, you gotta know that."

Steve stared at him, his expression unreadable, though his hands had curled into tight fists at his sides. Finally, he let out a long, slow breath and pulled a chair over, sinking into it heavily. “You’re a good guy, Buck,” he said, his voice measured. “But she has baggage, a lot of it. And when she feel things, she feels them hard. This isn’t just about you. If you’re in this with her, you better be damn sure, because she doesn’t deserve to get hurt, not after everything shes been through already."

Bucky’s gaze hardened, his voice steady. “I’m already in it, Steve. I care about her.”

Steve leaned back, his expression softening slightly, though his eyes were still clouded with frustration. “Alright,” he said after a beat. “I’m gonna trust you. But if you screw this up—”

“I won’t,” Bucky interrupted firmly. “I swear.”

Before Steve could respond, there was a knock at the door. Natasha stepped in, her fiery green eyes immediately locking onto Bucky like a laser beam. Her presence filled the small room, her sharp gaze unrelenting.

“Steve,” she said, her voice tight with restrained anger. “Can I talk to you? Alone.”

Bucky, sensing the shift in the air, raised his hands in mock surrender. “That’s my cue,” he said, his voice lighter than the tension in the room warranted. “Almost game time, Cap. See you out there.” He slipped past Natasha, avoiding her piercing glare as he left.

The sound of the team’s laughter spilled into the room for a moment before Steve shut the door again, sealing them in quiet. He turned to Natasha, his brows furrowed. “What’s wrong?”

Natasha crossed her arms, her posture tense as she leaned against the desk. Her fiery demeanor softened slightly as she glanced at the closed door, then back at Steve. It was clear she was weighing her words carefully.

“What is it?” Steve pressed, stepping closer. He rested his hands on her shoulders, his voice gentler now. “Nat, talk to me.”

She exhaled sharply, her hands balling into fists at her sides. “Steve… I have to tell you something. Y/N told me earlier, i promised i wouldn't say anything, but fuck it you deserve, no, need to know.”

Steve’s stomach twisted, a sinking feeling spreading through him like ice. “What'd she say?”

Natasha hesitated, her green eyes flickering with something between anger and sadness. “When she got here before practice, she came through the office. She heard Bucky and some of the guys talking.”

Steve’s face hardened instantly, his jaw tightening. “What'd she hear?”

Natasha ran a hand through her hair, her frustration palpable. “One of the guys made some gross comment about her. Something like how they knew she’d have a nice rack. And Bucky…” She paused, her teeth clenched. “Bucky laughed. Said she was easy. That she practically begged for it.” Her voice cracked slightly, but she pushed on. “Then he said it wasn’t even that good.”

Steve’s fists clenched so tightly his knuckles turned white, his face a mask of disbelief and fury. “You’re sure that’s what she said? What she heard?" His voice was dangerously low, each word like a blade.

Natasha nodded firmly. “She’s too scared to tell you because she knows you’ll kill him.”

Steve stood there, frozen, the weight of Natasha’s words sinking in. His breath was heavy, his chest rising and falling as his rage simmered just beneath the surface. “She knows me best, because I'm going to kill him,” he muttered, his voice like steel.

Before Natasha could respond, there was another knock at the door. The coach stuck his head in, oblivious to the storm brewing in the room. “Game time, Rogers. Let’s go. Wrap it up.”

Steve didn’t move right away, his body tense with anger. Natasha stepped closer, resting a hand on his arm. “Good luck out there,” she said softly.

Steve nodded tightly, his jaw still clenched as he stormed out of the office. His mind was a whirlwind of fury and betrayal, but he knew the locker room wasn’t the place for a fight that's for the ice.

As he headed toward the rink, the team’s laughter echoed faintly in the distance, each sound like a knife twisting deeper into his chest. But Steve’s focus had narrowed to one thought: this wasn’t over. Not by a long shot.

----

The arena buzzed with the electric energy of the game. The crowd roared with each pass and shot, a wave of noise echoing through the building. You stood at your usual spot near the boards, camera in hand, your focus shifting between capturing the action and watching Steve. Something about the way he was playing tonight seemed… off.

Steve, typically a controlled and calculated player, was skating with an unusual edge. He was throwing his weight into every check, slamming opponents into the boards with a force that drew cheers from the crowd but left you uneasy. His movements were sharp, almost reckless, and you caught yourself flinching every time he collided with another player.

Your camera clicked away, capturing the intensity of the game. It was the second period, the score tied at 2-2, and you knew every moment mattered. When the puck found its way to Steve’s stick, he moved in like lightning, his eyes locked on the net. You held your breath, the camera lens trained on him as he wound up for the shot.

He fired, but the puck sailed just wide, barely missing the post. You could see the frustration etched across his face as he muttered something to himself. Before you could process, the rebound came flying toward Bucky, who was perfectly positioned in front of the net. With a clean slapshot, Bucky buried the puck in the top corner, the red light flashing as the arena erupted in cheers.

Normally, Bucky would skate over to Steve, their silent but familiar way of celebrating their teamwork. But this time, Steve didn’t even glance at him. Instead, he skated off, his jaw tight, leaving Bucky to celebrate with the rest of the team.

You lowered your camera, frowning. Something was definitely wrong.

As the period progressed, your attention kept shifting between the game and Steve. He was more physical than ever, throwing hits and barking at the refs. But what really caught your eye was the way Bucky kept glancing at you. Even from your spot on the sidelines, you could feel his gaze between plays, his blue eyes searching for yours like they always did. Normally, it sent butterflies fluttering through your chest. Tonight, it made your stomach twist with unease.

You weren’t the only one who noticed.

During a line change, Steve caught one of Bucky’s fleeting glances in your direction. His eyes narrowed, his face darkening. The tension was almost palpable, and you felt the shift in the air before anything even happened. “Hey Natasha?” You questioned as your eyes stayed on the ice.

She leaned forward from her seated position beside you. “Yeah?”

You swallowed, as you recognized the look in Steve’s eyes, the way his jaw was set. “Did you tell Steve by any chance?” She didn’t get the chance to answer.

Steve was skating hard, charging into the offensive zone when he veered sharply toward Bucky—his own teammate—and slammed him into the boards with a force that made the glass rattle. The crowd gasped, the sound cutting through the game’s usual noise.

“What the hell, man?!” Bucky shouted, spinning to face Steve as he skated past.

Steve stopped abruptly, turning back with fire in his eyes. “You’re lucky I’m not beating your fucking face in right now.”

“What are you even talking about?” Bucky snapped, his brows furrowed in confusion.

The referee’s whistle blew, signaling a stoppage, but Steve wasn’t done. He skated closer, shoving Bucky hard in the chest. “She heard you.”

Bucky froze. “Who? Heard what?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” Steve growled. “Your whole little shebang with the team. Saying she was begging you, calling her desperate.”

Bucky’s face fell, the color draining from his cheeks. “Steve, let me explain—”

“Explain what?!” Steve shouted, his voice carrying over the ice. “That you’re a lying piece of shit? That you treated her like she was nothing? I just said I was going to trust you!"

The refs rushed over, trying to separate them, but Steve wasn’t backing down. He shoved past one of the officials and ripped Bucky’s helmet off with a furious yank, sending it clattering to the ice. “You’re done talking, and I'm done listening.”

Before anyone could react, Steve’s fist connected with the side of Bucky’s head, sending him stumbling back. The arena gasped in unison, the sound echoing in the sudden silence.

Bucky recovered quickly, his eyes blazing with anger. He dropped his gloves, grabbing Steve by the collar of his jersey and landing a clean uppercut that snapped Steve’s head back. The two of them were a blur of fists and fury, blood splattering the ice as they went at each other like enemies, not teammates.

The benches cleared as their team skated over, trying to break them apart. The crowd roared, some cheering, others shouting in disbelief. By the time the refs and assistant coaches managed to separate them, both men were bleeding, their jerseys torn, and their faces etched with rage.

“Get them the hell off the ice!” the head coach bellowed, motioning for the assistants to escort them to the locker room.

As Steve was guided toward the tunnel, he twisted out of the one of the assistant coach’s grip just enough to turn back to Bucky. His voice was cold and venomous. “If you ever fucking look at her, go near her or talk to her again, you’re dead.”

[kenzlie]

just one more? c.s

𝗒𝗈𝗎 were a 𝖻𝗋𝖺𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖻𝗈𝗒𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝗁𝗋𝗂𝗌, 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝖾𝗑𝗉𝖾𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗂𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗄𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝖿 𝖺 𝗍𝗎𝗋𝗇..

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: SMUTT, oral (male receiving), degrade kink, praise kink, inappropriate language, p n v, unprotected sex, hair pulling, slapping, probably more idk i’m ℱ𝓇ℯ𝒶𝓀𝓎..

A/N: This is like my 1st post on tumblr, btw this is short bc the first time i wrote it, it got deleted, anyways if you do not like what i write and say, you can leave!! (it’s free) anyways enjoy 😈.

Orange = chris speaking, pink = fem speaking

i was sitting on the couch watching a movie, i was waiting for my boyfriend chris to get back from dropping matt and nick off at a sleepover

me and chris have a good relationship we understand each other very well and get along good, well sometimes just not always, anytime we have sex it’s gentle sex and always protected

the movie ended a few minutes ago and i’m scrolling on my phone, i hear the front door knob rattle before being opened “i’m back baby” “hi chris” i say while putting me phone away and smiling at him as he sets his stuff down and plops next to me on the couch “sorry i took so long, matt and nick got hungry so we stopped to get them food” “don’t be sorry baby, wanna make some brownies?” “yeah sure”

we’re standing in the kitchen mixing the batter, well i was, chris was just standing and watching “are you gonna help or just stand there?” i say with a bit of a attitude “you can do it” “no come help chris” i say annoyed, he ignores me “oh so now you can’t hear?” “i can hear perfect but you wanted to make them” “i thought you’d be a good boyfriend and help, i mean come on it’s common sense chris.” “i’m okay you got it” i groan at his annoying comment

i was pouring the batter into the pan making sure it was just perfect and right “let me lick the spoon” chris says trying to grab it from my hand, i pull my hand back “no, you should’ve helped” i say licking the spoon while keeping eye contact, teasing him by the minute

i had put the brownies in the oven to cook about 15 minutes ago, they’d be done it 5 to 10 minutes, me and chris were sitting on the couch looking at our phones, chris wasn’t speaking to me over the spoon thing, typical childish chris

“your a brat do you know that?” he says breaking the silence “excuse me?” i say knowing i have but chris never minded it “you heard me, you’ve been a fucking brat.” “so? your point is?” “my point is you should your attitude before i fix it for you.” “ok bud..” i knew then i had got under his skin, he HATED when i called him bud,buddy,bro or any sort of name like that, he gives me a death stare and was about to say something before the oven timer went off, i get up walking over to the kitchen,i turn off the oven before bending down with my oven mits, grabbing the pan and placing it on the counter, i turn around about to go grab a knife to cut the brownies, but instead i turn around to chris death staring me "can i help you chris?" i ask, without a word chris picks me up putting me on the edge of the counter before smashing his lips against mine "chris.." i say muffled "i warned you, did you listen? no."

all of a sudden he’s carrying me up the stairs to the bedroom, chris has never been like this with me he’s always gentle and soft, he tosses me on the bed “you wanna act like a brat? i’ll fuck you like one.” he stands in front of me unbuttoning his jeans “come here slut” he says as he pulls his boxers down, his long hard length slapping against his lower stomach, i crawl over to him as he stands at the end of the bed “chris i’m not giving you head after you didn’t even try helping me in the kitchen” he pulls my face up to look at him “do you really think i care? now open.” he says slapping my cheek slighty, i open my mouth slightly as he shoves himself in without warning “mph!” i say muffled, i suck slowly since that’s usually how we always go, slow and gentle, “faster whore..” he breathes out grabbing my hair and fucking my mouth, i stroke what i can’t fit, “fuck..” he moans, almost whimpering, i speed up my pace with both my hands and mouth, all of a sudden he shoots warm white ropes to the back of my throat, i swallowed his load as i breathe out

before i can even speak im being pushed onto my back, chris wastes to time pulling off my shirt and pants, leaving me only in my underwear and bra, my underwear was soaked, i looked away embarrassed, chris grabs my face to look at him “how fucking pathetic..” he slips my underwear off my body before rubbing his tip around my folds “please don’t tease..” i beg letting out a whine that was quickly replaced with a gasp that was caused from chris shoving himself inside me, his thrust were fast and rough “c-chris!” i moan as i throw my head back, chris’s hand snakes behind my head grabbing a fist full of hair, pulling on it to make me look at him, his free hand was stabbing into my hip as he fucked me without mercy “g-gonna cum baby..” i warn “c’mon baby cum for me..” my orgasm hits me hard, i moan out grabbing onto whatever i can, chris doesn’t stop, “can’t take it!” i whine “c’mon ma, just one more?”, chris thrusts into me harshly a few more times before i cum again, i could tell he was close, clearly from his now sloppy thrusts “fuck fuck fuck..” he whispers before pulling out and spilling all over my stomach

after chris cleaned me up and helped me change, he simply threw on some plaid pants and a white tank top, he crawled in bed next to me cuddling up behind me “i love you baby..” he whispers into my ear “i love you too chris..” i whisper back.

A/N: this is my first smut in a while so ntm, anywho i hope you enjoyed this!!

@chrissslut

[mysecretlittlelibrary]

Hello! I don't know if you're still taking requests, but if you do, could I please request an imagine where the reader and eddie are best friends and the reader gets really injured when Venom is in a fight, bonus points if eddie has to do cpr to revive her. Thank you so so much!

~Hazard of Our Friendship~

Pairing: Eddie Brock x Reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: drowning mention, knives, graphic depictions of violence

Genre: fluffy angst

Summary: Your best friend has a symbiotic alien sharing his body which means sometimes he gets attacked while you're just trying to discuss a movie.

A/N: Oh darling my asks are always open~! xo hope you like it!

***

You scoff as you listen to Eddie talk. You can't believe what he's saying.

"You're crazy! You seriously think that was better than the second one?" You ask incredulously.

"I think each movie gets better than the last." Eddie says.

"What're you smoking and how do I get some because you are clearly on something." You snort.

"I liked it I don't see the problem." He shrugs.

"That's not the question though! I liked it too but it's NOT better than the second one was!" You shake your head.

"You do this every time we see one of these movies." Eddie chuckles.

"Because the second was the best! It's in a league of its own they're never gonna do better than that." You say.

"Okay fine ye of little faith and quick judgment- what could they do to make the next movie better than the second movie?" Eddie rolls his eyes playfully.

"The second movie was just iconic! When they realize and manage to replicate the intensity with which that movie hit emotionally, they'll have another masterpiece. It's not about duplicating though, they shouldn't repeat the plot, they just need to figure out how to create a similar pull. That's what I'm looking for I need a pull and the newer movies just haven't been pulling me."

"You're insane you know that?"

"I think you need to rewatch the second movie. Clearly you aren't properly remembering the absolute magic of the second movie dude." You shake your head.

"Clearly." He snorts. A moment passes and notice something change abruptly in your friend's demeanor.

"What?" You frown at him.

"What?" He snaps his head towards you.

"Your energy shifted, something changed. Why? What's going on?"

"Nothing." He says quickly.

"You're on edge. I can see it so don't lie to me. Especially because you're starting to stress me out." You tell him.

"Venom's a little- freaked. He thinks we've got company." Eddie admits.

"Not the good kind I'm guessing. Based on your... disposition."

"Just- stay close, it'll be fine." Eddie says gently resting his hand on your arm. He's clearly on high alert, eyes scanning every darkened alley you walk by. You catch movement off to one side and grab Eddie's attention.

"E- could those be our visitors?" You ask. Eddie follows your eye.

"Fuck me- it's fine, just stay behind me." Eddie steps forward and uses his arm to nudge you behind him.

"Come on Eddie, they're just some guys. This should be easy." You say.

"Unfortunately if they've come for me it's never just some guys." Eddie sighs. "Look guys- I'm sure you don't want any trouble, whatever you think you're gonna gain from this, you'll lose a lot more- trust me." Eddie tells the group. There's maybe 5 of them it seems, but you can't be sure others aren't lurking nearby.

"Yeah- that's the bastard." One of the guys grumbles and Eddie's eyebrow furrows.

"Wait sorry- do you know me or something?" Eddie asks, tilting his head.

"You fucking jackass-" The guy is clearly appalled by Eddie's perceived audacity and starts towards you and Eddie.

"Venom." Eddie calls.

"COPY." Venom replies before overtaking Eddie. You step back a bit to accommodate the size change. Also to give him room, Venom's fighting style is- messy from what you know.

You've never actually seen them fight, although Eddie didn't try to hide Venom from you, he was very intentional about limiting your exposure to him. You're not totally sure why, but it doesn't stop you from making nice with him. Eddie swears the relationship between them is mostly symbiotically beneficial, which means he'll probably be around for a while. Which means he'll be around you for a while, and you want that to be a net positive. So you always ask about him and include him in your relationship with Eddie, and bring him chocolate any time you hang out with them. Eddie swears you spoil him so you hope that means he likes you.

Venom seems to be handling the fight pretty well, I mean he can grow appendages at will, no matter how many of them there are, they can't outmatch him.

"You're coming with me." A gruff voice says wrapping a hand around your wrist.

You snap your head around quickly.

"Fuck off. Don't touch me." You take your index and middle finger and jam them into the inner corners of his eyes.

He screams as you dig your digits in deeper.

"You're ruining movie night." You drag him forward by his eye sockets and bash his head into your knee knocking him out. "Asshole." You huff.

"Eulgch gross now my hand is covered in eye juice." You frown. You bend over and wipe your hand on his shirt.

"That's better I guess." You say stepping over the guy to wear Venom has dragged the fight, near the pier.

"Not so fast." A voice grits out behind you as arms encircle your body, trapping you.

"Hey let go of me you bastard." You grunt squirming against his hold.

Your movements stop abruptly with a sharp gasp when you feel cool metal against your throat. A knife.

"Really? An 8 foot monster is stomping out your little pals and you go for the one who isn't doing shit? Coward." You scoff.

"Shut up." He spits through clenched teeth.

"Eddie!" You call out. "No rush but when you get a second some help would be nice! VENOM!" You shout, the blade digging ever so slightly into your skin.

Venom snaps his head towards you and immediately changes his focus, heading towards you and the person holding you hostage.

Your captor walks you backwards as Venom closes in but as he reaches an appendage towards you one of the others pulls out a flamethrower. Where did he get a fucking flamethrower?!

"Venom look out!" You shout but you're not quick enough.

The fire hits him. He lets out a roar of a sound. And then retreats into Eddie, who falls to his knees.

"Eddie?!" You call frantically.

"I'm fine! Just- gotta give Venom time to recover." Eddie grunts.

"If you're fine get up and turn around you dumbass!" You shout. The guy with the flamethrower is closing in on Eddie, luckily he's dropped the thing. Not really a smart move in your opinion but it makes Eddie's chances of beating him without Venom higher.

Eddie spins on his heel just in time to dodge a wild swing from mister flamethrower.

"Woah. Shit." Eddie says. He punches the guy directly in the face and the two start a proper fist fight.

"Hang on y/n I'll be right there!" He tells you between throwing and dodging punches.

"Yeah, I wasn't planning on going anywhere!" You say.

"Could do without the sass at this moment dude!" He says.

"I've got a knife to my throat I'll do whatever I want to cope with it!" You shoot back.

"Sorry about all this!"

"Hazard of our friendship! I know how this goes!" You say.

Eddie finally takes down his opponent and turns to you. He runs in your direction, Venom at some point taking over and freaking out your captor. For a guy holding a knife to your throat he's moving incredibly reckless, stumbling backwards and dragging you with him. Right over the edge of the pier. You scream as you fall back, at least you've been released it seems. Your assailant, in trying to save himself has freed you from his grasp.

The water is a bit chilly, it's not as bad as it could be, but it is only August so it'd be weird if it was ice cold. Water fills your mouth as you sink below the surface. You try to swim up, but the other guy wraps his hand around your leg. You can't swim super well as is, the extra weight hindering your movement pretty much renders your attempt to save yourself futile. Still you flail and desperately kick at your attacker's hand, hoping that you can get him to let you go before your lungs give out. They're already starting to seriously burn.

You hate open water. Besides the fact that you're nowhere near a strong enough swimmer based on the dangers of open water like this, you can't see anything and not knowing what lurks nearby stresses you out even more.

You're starting to panic. The longer you're down here, the more undersea monsters you seem to be able to imagine. You're going to die down here and some random swimming creatures will start eating your decaying flesh and your family won't even have a body to bury when they have your funeral. Or if they manage to find you, you'll be so destroyed by critters they'll have to keep the casket closed. Honestly at this point you hope they cremate you.

The panicking isn't helping. You know it's not, and yet it's all you can do as your vision is starting to blacken around the edges. You still can't get this guy to let go of your fucking leg, and dammit you're getting too weak to keep fighting him. How is he still holding on? You feel your body go limp as you lose consciousness.

Eddie's heart drops as he watches you go over the edge of the pier. You can barely swim, you hate the open water, he has to get you out of there and fast. The only problem is it feels like these goons keep multiplying and if they have to keep fighting he'll never reach you in time.

"We have to get to y/n." Eddie says.

"WE WILL." Venom says ready to fight the next guy.

"No, now V! Fuck the fighting I don't care eat them if you have to. Just get to her!"

"GREAT PLAN." Venom's smile is enough to freak out the person standing between them and where you're currently drowning.

Eddie's counting the seconds as Venom traipses towards the water, biting off heads on the way. There's not even enough movement near the surface for Eddie to tell if you're still alive down there. It's taking you two long to come up.

"YOUR STRESS IS MAKING THIS MORE DIFFICULT EDDIE."

"I'll stop stressing when we get y/n out of the fucking water!" Eddie snaps.

"FINE!" Venom dives into the water and manages to find you surprisingly quickly, dragging your lifeless body out of the water.

"Put her down we have to do something." Eddie says.

"WHAT DO WE DO?" Venom asks.

"You watch my back while I try to remember my high school CPR class." Eddie tells him, kneeling beside you.

Pressure.

There's a pressure against your chest.

It's rhythmic, consistent, and just a couple of pascals short of risking a broken rib.

Your nose is pinched and something touches your lips. Air flows into your mouth in bursts and then again with the pressure.

Suddenly you feel water coming up and you lurch forward to expell it, coughing painfully as your body tries to get rid of the water forced into your lungs when you nearly drowned.

"God drowning sucks." You choke out, your voice coming out very raspy and it honestly hurts to say even that short sentence.

"Thank fuck." Eddie sighs, his shoulders dropping in relief.

"YOU'RE ALIVE! EDDIE WE SAVED HER." Venom pokes his head around over Eddie's shoulder.

"I thought I was going to lose you." Eddie whispers, cupping your cheek gently.

"I'm almost offended you thought I'd go out that easily." You joke, coughing again.

"Stop talking! You'll hurt yourself." Eddie says.

"Oh would you relax. I'm not dead, talking won't do me in." You roll your eyes.

"YOU SOUND LIKE YOU ARE IN PAIN." Venom says.

"Thanks V." You snort.

"Venom she just almost drowned dude." Eddie shakes his head.

"I AM TRYING TO CHECK ON HER. WHAT IS THE PROBLEM!?"

"Nothing's wrong. Don't you two start. Just- can you take me home?" You groan forcing yourself up. Eddie scrambles to his feet, helping you up until eventually Venom simply takes over and lifts you into his arms.

"Venom I'm pretty sure I can still walk ya know." You say, admittedly a bit nervous in his hold. Not that you think he'll drop you, you've just never interacted with him so directly.

"YOU SHOULDN'T STRAIN YOURSELF. AND WE ARE TAKING YOU TO OUR APARTMENT."

"What? Why?"

"SO WE CAN TAKE CARE OF YOU WHILE YOU GET BETTER."

"Get better? All I need to do is shower and go to sleep, I'll be fine." You scoff.

"EDDIE WANTS TO SEE THAT FOR HIMSELF."

"You're very lucky I don't have any more energy to argue about all this." You mutter.

Eddie counts his blessings when he hears that. Of course it would take you nearly drowning to finally allow him to look after you. Little victories he supposes. Granted saving your life is definitely way more than a little victory. You are the single most important person in his life. If he wasn't sure of that before this he's absolutely sure of it now.

***

[rosiehrs]

civil war | hanni

summary ; you don't know how to function without expressing your disdain for each other, but sometimes all you need is to share a drink to bring peace.

pairing ; hanni pham x fem!reader

content ; non idol!au, enemies to lovers…?, mild jealousy, lame insults, hanni doesnt like yn's outfits, yn and hanni are annoying

genre ; fluff

word count ; 4075

not even 10 seconds in and the two of you were already going at it.

“goofy outfit, bro.” hanni comments as you finally arrive at the café you all agreed to eat at. you raised your eyebrow at her, scoffing. “i know you’re not talking with that hair.”

“i’m trying something NEW. maybe you should too!” she fought back, crossing her arms and turning away from you. “we’ve been here together for approximately 5 seconds and you’re already at it. i’m genuinely amazed. how are we a function friend group?” minji complains, the look of disbelief clear on her face. danielle laughed, wrapping her arms around you and hanni. “it’s gonna be a fun day! brighten up, everyone! we’re gonna eat good, have good conversations and so much more!” 

“unnie, yn and hanni will kill each other before any of that happens.” hyein butts in as she eyes the desserts on display. “so not true! what do you think, haerin?” dani asks, catching the younger girl off guard. haerin slowly turns to look at her and blinks. “mm.”

“exactly! thank you! now let’s eat and have fun, yes?”

“yes..” you all replied. you looked over to see hanni glaring at you, causing a laugh to escape your throat. you stuck your tongue out at her and let dani drag you to a table.

“why can’t you just be a normal person and wear a normal outfit?”

“how is this not a normal outfit?”

“you’re just not normal.”

“do you think you’re funny?”

“i’m funnier than you.”

“im taller than you.”

“who fucking asked you?”

“i–”

“no one asked! next!” hanni interrupts, taking a huge bite out of her bread roll menacingly. “i hope you choke.” you replied, kicking her under the table earning a muffled yelp. you laughed as you watched her aggressively chew, clearly wanting to say something back at you. “apapap! unnie, calm down, you might actually choke.” she looked at danielle and defeatedly obeyed. she looked up, sending you a glare. a small smile couldn't help but spread across your face as you watched her cheeks full of bread move up and down. you couldn’t deny that hanni was cute. even at times when you found her absolutely insufferable, you still found her adorable. but that was something you’d take to the grave. 

“...party and she invited us.”

the girls all began to agree with minji’s words but you were too caught up in your own world to listen. “wait, wait. what? sorry, i zoned out.”

“i said wonyoung is throwing a party tomorrow and she invited us. but i think there will be drinks there? you comfortable with that, hyein? we would take care of you!”

“please. it’s a party thrown by wonyoung unnie, of course there are drinks. besides, i’ve been friends with you guys for so long, i think i’m comfortable around alcohol.” she replied, rolling her eyes. minji laughed at her, bumping her shoulder. “okay, big girl. you down, y/n?” you nodded excitedly, “yeah! should be fun.”

“hanni? dani? haerin?”

“i’m down!” danielle cheers. “me too.”

“hanni?” minji asks again. “oh, uh, yeah. sure, i’m down.” she muttered, sending minji a small smile. “great! i’ll let her know.” and you all easily found yourselves lost in another silly conversation, but your eyes never left hanni. you could tell something was off but you weren’t close enough to push. if you asked you were certain she would just tell you to go away, so you decided to stay safe and just.. wonder from afar.

you got into minji’s car, greeting everyone excitedly. hyein was in the passenger seat and haerin was sitting on dani’s lap behind them. “we should start taking my family car when we all go out.” hyein suggested, causing minji to laugh. “my car is perfectly fine!”

“you’re not drinking tonight, min?” you asked. “nah, gotta take care of this big baby.” hyein groaned and started arguing with minji about how she wasn’t a baby and that she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself. minji simply laughed and let the younger girl yap until they reached hanni’s house. she opened the door and stopped her movements as she laid her eyes on you. “these damn outfits, y/n. i want to laugh, but i just feel bad.”

“can we leave her, please? i’m begging.”

“hi hanni unnie! please get in!” 

she hesitantly gets in next to you and shuts the door. you awkwardly tried to shuffle further away, but it was no use. with the two girls next to you, you had no space to go anyway. you tried to remain respectful and leave a little gap between the two of you, but it just meant you squeezed in closer to the other two. 

minji made an abrupt turn causing everyone in the car to move with it. you were pressed against hanni as she grabbed your arm to prevent herself from flying away. “shit, sorry everyone! that car came out of nowhere.”

“unnie, we’re not even there yet and you’re already trying to kill us!” hyein yelled.

“ow.” haerin mumbled, rubbing her head. “you okay, rin?” dani asked, getting a nod in response. you felt some pressure on your arm and saw that hanni had still been holding onto it. “you good?” you asked quietly. her eyes widened as she realised and quickly let go of you, “um, yeah. i.. don’t talk about it.” she turned away to face the window and you laughed at her antics.

“holy shit, where the hell am i supposed to park? the whole street is full?”

with a scoff, hyein crosses her arms. “of course the entirety of seoul is here, it’s wonyoung unnie’s party.” 

“unnie, there! free spot there!” dani directed, minji quickly driving to secure the spot. it took a few minutes.. with hyein yelling, dani trying to help, you and hanni quietly arguing about God knows what and haerin just.. listening to everything.

you all eagerly made your way to wonyoung’s house – mansion? castle? either works! there were already heaps of people in her front yard, walking into her house was another level. there were seas of people, some familiar, some not. you looked around and saw a dj up on a stage-like area, wonyoung knew how to throw parties.

you made your way through the huge crowds, searching for your friends. stepping foot into the kitchen, you see wonyoung, yujin and rei chatting with other people. wonyoung looked up and squealed as she saw you. her face lit up as she ran towards all of you, giving you all a hug. “you came! i’m so happy! i’ve missed you guys! it was only supposed to be a small gathering, but people bring people and those people bring people and you know how it goes.” 

“i can imagine, looks great though! very lively!” dani exclaims, excited by the atmosphere. “thank you! the snacks and drinks are over there and hyein! there’s a bunch of juice! if there’s anything else you need, please just come looking for me! have fun you guys, i’ll call you when we start playing games.”

you all thanked her and made your way towards the snack table. “who’s drinking, raise your hand.” minji said (yelled) over the music. dani and you raised your hands, high fiving in the process. you and dani poured yourselves some drinks and made your way back to your friends. hyein was dancing with minji, haerin and hanni, making the both of you smile. “they’re cute.” you stated, sipping your drink. “yeah, they are! let’s dance!” dani giggled as she dragged you to the dance floor where your other friends were. 

after a few songs, you started to get tired. you stepped away from your group and went to get a sip of water. you looked around and saw a familiar figure outside on the patio. you curiously made your way outside, startling said familiar figure.

“hanni?”

“what are you doing here?” she asked, turning back to look away from you. you shut the sliding door and sat down next to her. “i.. just saw you out here. i didn’t realise you left, are you okay?”

she nodded, “yeah, it was just.. loud. i’m okay. you can go back inside.” you thought about it for a second and decided to stay put. she looked at you with confusion on her face, “i said you can go back inside.” you shook your head and looked up at the sky. “nah, i’m good here.”

hanni opened her mouth to say something else but chose to keep it to herself after she saw how content you looked next to her. she cleared her throat, not knowing how to start a conversation with you. insulting you didn’t seem very fitting in this setting so she didn’t know what to do. “we can just sit in silence, don’t be weird.” you spoke, amusement clear in your voice. “whatever, i’m just trying not to make it awkward.”

“it’s only awkward if you make it awkward.” she blinked at you a few times before looking back up at the sky. she took a deep breath in and closed her eyes. you turned to look at her and couldn’t help but smile. she glowed in the moonlight and when she opened them, you saw stars in her eyes. 

“wanna go for a walk?” you regretted it as soon as you opened your mouth. you were certain she was going to laugh at you and throw a childish insult at you. but much to your surprise, she stood up and said, “let’s go.”

you stared at her with shock on your face, quickly standing up and taking your phone out to let minji know. you walked along wonyoung’s neighbourhood, quietly rating each house you walked by. the streetlights weren’t too bright, but weren’t too dim. they gave off the perfect light it reflected clearly on hanni’s face.

“you know, if you weren’t such an asshole - i would be able to say you look pretty without regretting it.”

you heard hanni’s breath hitch next to you, quickly coughing to cover it up. “what happened to being in silence?” she snapped back, trying to hide the fact that she was turning red. “i just called you pretty, can’t you be decent for once and just say thank you?” you retorted, rolling your eyes.

“it- i-.. thank you..” she defeatedly whispered. “see, was that so hard?” she muttered a snarky reply under her breath, but she was extremely flustered. you just watched her for a few seconds, genuinely taken aback by her beauty. you held no hatred for the girl next to you, in fact it was the opposite. you wouldn’t lie and say you were never hurt by the things she said. most times you genuinely had no idea whether or not she actually hated you or this was just her way of communicating with you. like.. it was your thing? but curiosity is strong and sometimes people need answers.

“hanni?” you began, kicking a rock on the path. she hummed in response, looking down at the ground. “do you actually dislike me?” you asked, still avoiding eye contact. “oh.” was all she could let out. she turned to look at you and felt guilty as soon as she saw the look on your face. of course she didn't hate you, she definitely wasn’t good at showing that but dislike was the last thing she felt for you.

“you’ve always argued with me and insulted me, so i reciprocated the energy. i thought it was just banter, but we never seemed to get past it. come to think of it, this is probably the closest thing we’ve had to a proper conversation.”

her demeanor softened, voice laced with guilt. “no, i don’t dislike you. i just thought you didn’t like me either.” she said, eyes glued to the floor.

“i’ve always liked you but with the way you treated me, i knew i didn’t have a chance.”

“no, it– wait what?” she froze and stopped in her tracks, “a chance?” 

“yeah–oh, i see how this can be misinterpreted.” you responded, standing next to her. “oh, you mean like.. have a chance to be friends with me?”

“no.. i mean have a chance with you.” you clarified, leaving hanni dumbfounded. “what?”

“i mean, even with the way you treat me - i see how you treat others. i know you’re a good and kind person, i guess being pretty helps as well, but you’re funny and you care for others. i see how funny you are, how you care for our friends, i know you have a nice voice. you help take care of hyein, you look out for haerin, you help minji out when she feels overwhelmed with everything, you and dani are a great pair and– ”

“– you like me?” she interrupts, eyes almost popping out of her eye sockets.

you tilted your head at her, “yes..?” 

“how?”  “erm.. did i not just explain?”

“how are you acting like this isn’t a big deal?” hanni screeched, throwing her head into her hands, “we’ve spent years shitting on each other and you’re saying you’ve liked me this entire time?!” her voice went up an octave with every word. you quickly shushed her with your hands, trying to prevent the entire neighbourhood from hearing her, “hanni, it doesn’t have to be a big deal! i didn’t tell you because i expected anything, i just wanted to share my side of things. i like you, so i’ve just followed your lead. if arguing and insulting is what you’re comfortable, then i’m alright with that.”

she shook her head, chuckling almost bitterly at your words. “y/n, i’ve always known you to be a sarcastic person, so i’ve only been acting like this towards you because i thought this was what you wanted.” 

she took a deep breath in, taking a step closer to you. “y/n, the truth is i–”

the sound of your ringtone cut her off, taking you both by surprise. you pulled your phone out of your pocket to see minji’s name displayed in big letters. “it’s–i’m sorry. give me a second.” you apologised, answering the call. “minji?”

hanni cleared her throat and took a step back, staring down at the ground. all she needed was 2 more seconds. minji’s timing was impeccable. all she wanted to do was laugh at the absurdity of it all, but all she could muster up was the fact that she felt defeated.

“oh, yeah, alright. we’re coming. okay, see you.” the call ended and you turned to hanni, “we have to go. haerin’s not feeling well.” hanni nodded and followed you as you turned to walk back to wonyoung’s house. “wait, sorry, i interrupted you earlier. you were saying something..?” you reminded, turning to her. her head was down and her shoulders were slumped, you couldn't help but wonder if this was because of what you told her. 

“huh? oh.. no.. it’s nothing. it doesn’t matter.” she mumbled, almost whispering. “are you sure? you can tell me anything, i won’t be offended.” you reassured. you wanted to hear what she felt about.. how you felt. you were almost getting to her, opening up to each other. “yeah, i’m sure. don’t worry about it. let’s just get back to them so we can take care of haerin.”

you slowly blinked at her before nodding. “hanni, i hope what i told you doesn’t change anything. or if i does, i hope we can at least be civil with each other.” she sent you a soft smile and replied, “of course.” with that, you were content. and you were a step closer to being friends.

you reached wonyoung’s house shortly, grabbing hanni’s arm to run towards minji’s car in the distance. “is haerin okay?” you asked immediately. 

they explained that she had snacked too much and needed to rest. the ride back home was.. awkward to say the least. you and hanni didn’t say a word to each other, looking in opposite directions. you felt as if you had screwed everything up until you felt her move next to you. she subtly shuffled closer to you, making your shoulders and knees touch. your entire body stiffened, startled by the sudden contact. 

it was all you could think about when you got home, that and hanni sending you a smile when she got dropped off. she made your heart flutter with the smallest gestures and you could only imagine how she’d make you feel once you were actually friends. you went to sleep that night with a content heart.

a few days after the party, you all agreed to meet up again to try out a new café. you rushed to get ready in hopes that hanni would arrive early again. you reached the café half an hour before the initial plan, eagerly searching for the australian girl.your shoulders slumped when you realised you were the first to arrive. you grudgingly went to find a table big enough to seat all of you. you wanted to sulk, but you never made an arrangement with hanni. in fact, you haven’t spoken to her since the party. you sat there, busy arguing with yourself that you didn’t even realise someone had walked into the café.

a sweet voice snapped you out of your thoughts, “hi.” 

“oh.” you began, feeling your heart race as you saw her face. “hanni, hi. you’re early.” she chuckled and took the seat opposite you, “so are you. didn’t expect that from you. did something motivate you?”

“oh, don’t even. i don’t know what you’re talking about.” you scowled, scrolling on your phone to hide the blush creeping up on your face. she pushed your phone down with a grin, “we have to talk, y/n.”

“about what..?” 

“your clothes. what the hell are you wearing.” your facial expressions dropped and you stared at her with a look of disapproval. “i’m not impressed. you’re not funny. it’s good to see that you fixed your hair though.” you retorted.

“you still find me pretty, don’t you?” she teased with a smile. all you could do was stare and you knew you looked stupid. you felt stupid, of course she’d use it against you. she’s hanni. “i don’t like you.”

“hmm, that’s not what you–”

“i’m going to the bathroom! be right back!” you stood up and ran to the bathroom. you stared at yourself in the mirror, embarrassed by how flushed you looked. you wanted to strangle her. she was infuriating, how you still like her will always be a mystery to you. any regular person would hate hanni’s guts, and a part of you does! but for the most part, she makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside. you hated her for that, too. 

a few minutes later, you calmed yourself down and walked out to see your friends sitting there. you let out a breath of relief and ran to engulf minji in a hug. “thank you.” you whispered, confusing the girl. “um, you’re welcome?”

“oh, you’re so dramatic.” hanni sassed, “we were alone for ten minutes. it wasn’t that bad.” you watched her roll her eyes and cross her arms, sending you a glare shortly after. so much for being civil. 

‘if being alone with me for ten minutes is so torturous, why does she like me?’ hanni thought bitterly. she didn’t want to admit it, but she was jealous. she’s always been jealous of minji. you were close, always showing each other affection. hanni barely remembers a time when you weren’t on top of each other. it irked her–you irked her. you initiated all of that with minji; why couldn’t you do it with her? knowing how you feel for her, she feels a sense of entitlement over you. you should be hugging her like that. she didn’t pause for a second to think about how quick of a jump it would be for the both of you, nor did she pause to think about the fact that you had no idea that she felt the same way.

you made your orders and began debriefing about anything and everything that’s happened in the past week. however, hanni was too busy staring at you to listen to the conversation, deciding to kick you under the table to earn your attention. you flinched and stared at her with confusion written on your face. “what’s that?” she mouthed, pointing at your drink. 

“whipped cappuccino,” you answered, raising your eyebrows at her. “can i try?” she asked, and you nodded at her in response. she grabbed your drink and placed her lips on your straw. your eyes widened at her actions, and hanni felt accomplished with your reaction. “yum,” she responded, sliding your drink back over to you. 

“what was that.” hyein said, staring at the two of you incredulously. “what the hell was that.”

“what was what?” hanni asked casually, taking a bite out of her pastry. “she poisoned you. y/n unnie poisoned you. there’s no other explanation.” you scoffed at hyein, waving her off. “please.  if i wanted to poison her, i would’ve done it years ago. why would i have willingly put up with her all this time?”

“oh really? yeah, why would you willingly put up with me all this time? honestly, i wish you would’ve poisoned me so i wouldn’t have to deal with you anymore.”

“hyein, they were doing so good.” haerin muttered, throwing her head into her hands.

“you’re lucky to know me, i’m great to be around with! you didn’t mind my company at the party last week.” you retorted. “yeah, well you didn’t mind my company either.”

“why can’t you guys just be friends?” minji asked, clearly exasperated with your dynamics. “i–we are..! um.. friends..! right, hanni?”

“..just friends?” she replied.

“w-what?!” 

“what.”

“huh?!”

“pause.”

“...”

“y/n and i need to talk outside!” hanni sang, grabbing your wrist and dragging you out of the café. (and ignoring your friends and their comments)

“what the hell was that?!” you shrieked, still taken aback by her question. “it–you–i like you too, idiot!” she yelled, throwing her hands up in the air. “i don’t actually mean the insults i throw at you. that’s what i was trying to tell you before minji called.” you felt your entire world stop and in the moment you felt like your head was about to explode. “why the hell didn’t you tell me after?!”

“i was scared! i didn’t know how you’d react!” she responded, equally as hysterical as you. “well, i fucking told you i liked you, of course i’d react well, you fucking moron!”

“don’t call me a moron, i’m not a moron! you’re a moron!”

“why are you yelling at me?!” 

“why are you yelling at me?!” she retorted, causing you to change your demeanor. “oh, i’m sorry. i’m just freaking out. i don’t know what to do. what do we do now?” with a sigh, hanni shook her head. “i don’t know. i just feel stupid, we’ve liked each other for so long and we just.. wasted time. i wished i told you sooner.”

“me too, but there’s no better time than the present..? ..right?” you beckoned, earning a small smile from the girl in front of you. “you still want to be with me..?” 

you took a step closer, “if that’s okay with you?” hanni chuckled, grabbing your hands and wrapping them around her waist. “yeah, that could be arranged.”

“and we wouldn’t try to kill each other?”

“and we would compliment each other.”

“sounds gross,” you joked, yelping shortly after. “ow!” rubbing your arm with one hand and keeping the other around her waist. “you’re lucky you’re cute.”

you giggled, poking her sides. “you like me.”

“you like me too, don’t let it get to your head.” she grumbled, pulling you closer to her. she closed her eyes as she wrapped her arms around you and placed her head on your shoulder. for so long, she’s dreamt about the warmth of your embrace and now that she was in your arms–she didn’t want to be anywhere else.

“wait, so you don’t think my outfits are bad?”

“don’t ruin the moment, you loser.”

“you owe all me 50 bucks,” dani cheered with a grin on her face, groans from the other three following suit.

im going to die now, thank u. not proofread !!!!

[o3o-lapd-o3o]

okay! part 4 is here! still no dinner scene but hey, who doesn't like a telemachus and athena moment? huh? huh?

the post/thread that started this whole au

dinner scene: part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

there's a masterlist now!

*later that day* *telemachus walking around the palace ground and speaking with athena about poseidon & also tomorrows family dinner*

telemachus: so, you said lord poseidon is your uncle, right?

athena: *under her breath to herself* unfortunately

athena: *to telemachus this time* he is indeed my father’s brother.

telemachus: what does he like? what’s his favourite food? does eat with you and the other gods on olympus?

athena: *not expecting to play 40 questions about poseidon*

athena: HU- *coughs* why do you want to know? i thought you studied the gods when you were younger?

telemachus: i mean yeah, but those are other people’s words. what better way than to ask his actual family?

athena: *regretting this conversation, but answers because it is telemachus asking*

athena: if you are looking to strike a conversation with him, i can say for certain he will be interested in anything about his kingdom, the sea.

athena: as for food, i’m sure you know we gods, do not require mortal food for sustenance.

telemachus: *confused and stops walking*

telemachus: *turns and looks up at athena* but you ate breakfast this morning with us? and other meals?

athena: *stops walking also and laughs a little at his confused face*

athena: *ruffles telemachus’ hair* yes i did. we can find it enjoyable, whether it be an offering, during a feast or with…

athena: *stops ruffling his hair & smiles warmly at telemachus* family.

telemachus: *smiles*

telemachus: *continues walking*

athena: *continues with him*

telemachus: so, you still never said what his favourite food was?

athena: *shrugs* i don’t know, fish?

telemachus: *laughs* well we certainly have plenty of that!

*both continue talking and walking together*

*a short while later*

telemachus: ok so even though he does have a place to live on olympus, he doesn’t live there? how come?

athena: the sea is his domain, i would expect he feels more comfortable being always part of it. he knows everything that is happening on and in it then.

athena: also, i’m sure that having my father be king of the gods while also being his younger brother, is not something he would personally want to be around all the time.

athena: i think if it were my younger brother…

athena: *imagines ares as king of the gods* *shakes the thought immediately away*

athena: *waves hand in front of her in dismissal* never mind that thought.

telemachus: *eyebrow raised in confusion* uh ok.

athena: as i was saying, my father, while he is a great & wise king of us gods, occasionally having to sometimes deal with his...

athena: *thinks to the lighting shaped scars on her face and body*

athena: …games, does not always end up good for those who play them.

telemachus:

telemachus: so, he just prefers living in his palace under the sea basically?

athena: pretty much, yeah.

athena: maybe you could save some more of your questions for my uncle at dinner tomorrow?

athena: trust me, i’m sure he’d love to talk about himself.

telemachus: yeah, i’ve got so much to ask him!

telemachus: not just about himself, but how he and my father came to be such good friends!

athena: *laughing to herself as she knows the truth of said friendship*

athena: oh i too would like to know…

athena: *has a thought* little wolf, you’re helping your mother and the palace servants plan everything for tomorrow, correct?

telemachus: yeah i am!

telemachus: actually, i probably should go and find mother to discuss things.

athena: *gently holds his arm before he can run off* before you go, i believe it would be best if we sat your father and my uncle right next to each other don’t you think?

athena: i normally know your mother and father would sit together as king and queen, but this is a family dinner, is it not?

athena: *grins* friends should be with friends.

telemachus: *holds hand up for a high five* that sounds like a great idea athena! that means you’re next to me, right?

athena: *hive fives and then smiles at telemachus* of course.

telemachus: *smiling back* okay, i’ll go and let mother know!

telemachus: *waves before heading into the palace* bye ‘thena!

athena: *waves back* goodbye telemachus.

athena: *now to herself* oh tomorrow will be fun indeed.

[blackwidownat2814]

Steal My Thunder (T.Owens)

Pairing: Tyler Owens x female reader, Tyler Owens x shy!reader, Tyler Owens x insecure!reader

Word Count: 462

A/N: Welcome to my first Tyler Owens fic! I was throwing fic ideas around before I even saw the movie. I watched several interviews and other stuff on YouTube and took notes even. Then after seeing it the third time, I started working on this story. I don't anticipate this being a real long story, but I also will be a little slow to update because of work or writer's block or working on a crochet project I really need to finish. What I'm really saying is please be patient with me. Secondly, like in my other works, I'd planned to make this with a plus size!reader in mind, but I decided to go with insecure because I want to try and be a little more inclusive. Also, unless otherwise stated, my readers are always female readers. Lastly, I'm already working on Chapter 1, so keep an eye out for that. However, if you really like this, please let me know and I can tag you in future updates. And as always, I will be crossposting this to AO3. If you see this story anywhere besides AO3 or Tumblr, it's stolen Kthxbye! PS: Thanks to KJ & Jordyn for their help in beta-ing and title/chapter ideas! Love y'all!

Prologue

You were a Lead Meteorologist for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration.  You should not be handling school age tour groups.  You were just about DONE with being treated like a secretary.  The rest of them thought that just because Kate was gone that they could go back to treating you like they did before her.

You were quiet, shy, and someone whose love language was acts of service, so you loved to help people out.  The problem was that your co-workers abused that part of you.  They asked to lead the school groups, bring everyone coffee, put together packets for meetings, etc.  Complete nonsense…and you were done.

It was then, as you mentally typed up your resignation, that you received a serendipitous call from Kate herself.

“I believe the sayin’ is ‘No man left behind’.”

“You’re not an US Army Ranger, B.”

“Yeah, well…”  You trailed off, not wanting to burden your friend with your issues.  Kate always told you that it was okay to talk to her when you needed someone, but you were stubborn.  You were very much of the ‘friends aren’t therapists’ mindset.

“Talk to me B.”

“I’m happy for you, ya know?  You’re back to doing’ something I know you loved.  I can see it in your eyes with each video or stream I watch.”

“Okay, keep your secrets…and thank you.  I am happy.”

“So…what can I do for ya?  Why are you botherin’ me on my lunch hour?”

“Damn!  Sorry about that B.”

“You know I don’t actually care.  Tell me what’s up.”

“I’m callin’ with a job off-”

“I’ll take it.”

“Woah, I haven’t even said what it-”

“I don’t care.  Ever since you left, and because I’m a huge push over, everyone’s been walking all over me.  You know I had to do three tours today?”

“We’ve talked about this.”

“I know Kate.  Just…what’s the job anyway?”  Your friend was silent for a moment, before you heard her exhale.

“It’s storm data analysis really.”

“Elaborate.”

“We’re trying to really get down to the nitty gritty with the data from the EF-5 we got to dissipate last season and see where to improve, how to catalog it in our info database, etc.”

“I’m in”, you said.  “Y’all won’t treat me like some secretary, I’ll be close to home again, and I’ll get to spend all my time with you.”

“We most definitely will not treat you like some secretary.  We’re equal opportunity storm chasers out here.”

You tossed your empty sandwich bag into the trash and pulled up Word to start drafting your resignation letter.

“Say, what are the benefits as a Tornado Wrangler?”  Before Kate could reply, you heard Boonie baby! Woo! in the background.

With that enthusiasm, what could possibly go wrong?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tagging: @buckysdollforlife @13braincellsonly

[imaginespazzi]

Part 3: Miss Me, Miss Me Not

Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13 - Part 14 - Part 15

And it hits me when the lights go on (shit, maybe I miss you)

(In which a lazy writer somehow still manages to make her deadlines, much to her own shock)

Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd

Themes: Angst, Pining and a teensy bit of Fluff

Words: 5.8K

TW: Swearing (once again I think that's it?)

A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 I'm not gonna lie til about an hour ago, I very much did not think I was gonna give y'all a Monday update but here we are! A couple of housekeeping things, I went back and added months to the years so hopefully that's more helpful. I lowkey dislike this part but I felt like the fic needed it and I'm excited to write the next part. Ngl, the editing on this is pretty nonexistent because trying to read this back lowkey killed me so please feel free to point out mistakes so I can fix them. As always, let me know what you liked, and disliked and anything you wanna see going forward. I really appreciate all of y'alls feedback and the long reviews make my day! Have a good rest of your week lovies <3

September 2017

Azzi: just got home :) 

It’s a simple text and it should be easy for Paige to conjure up an equally simple reply. Instead she finds herself typing and deleting, over and over, because nothing sounds quite right. There’s this hollow feeling thrumming in her chest, that has only gotten stronger every passing minute since she’d said goodbye to Azzi at the airport. If she tries hard enough, she can still feel the remnants of their last hug lingering against every inch of her skin. She wants to memorize that feeling and create a blanket out of its threads to numb the ice cold shiver that’s been repeatedly running through her veins from the second Azzi had gotten on that plane. But even that might not be enough. Not when she’s learnt just how warm Azzi’s presence can be and how everything else pales in comparison. 

Paige lies to herself that it’s an accidental slip of her fingers, that she’d meant to press send not call, that she had every intention of hanging up the facetime on the first ring itself. 

But then Azzi picks up on the second one.

And really it would be rude to hang up. 

“Hey what’s up?” Azzi’s face fills the screen, tired eyes staring intently at Paige through the screen. 

“Oh um-” Paige fumbles for words, awkwardly shuffling her feet that are dangling off the side of her bed, “I just wanted to ask how your flight was?”

Azzi raises an eyebrow, “you couldn’t have texted me that?”

“Too tired to text,” Paige lies and the words i just wanted to hear your voice stay stuck, burning hot, in her throat, “gotta save these money-making fingers for more important things.”

“Yeah I’m hanging up-”

“NO-” it comes out far more forceful than it should and if possible, Azzi’s eyebrow shoots up even farther, as Paige clears her throat, “I mean- uh- you didn’t tell me how your flight was.”

Paige is too busy cringing at herself to notice the light blush that tinges Azzi’s cheeks. She’s too busy wondering why this girl brings out this nervous bumbling side of hers to notice the fond smile that almost cracks through Azzi’s lips. 

“The flight was okay. I actually got to sleep this time,” Azzi says pointedly and Paige laughs. 

“So what you’re saying is it was boring as hell.”

“I’m saying it was really peaceful not having someone yapping in my ear while I was trying to sleep.”

“So you didn’t miss me?” Paige presses, trying to keep her voice teasing despite how desperately she wants the admission. 

Azzi hesitates, as if she’s debating with herself, before, “I didn’t say that.”

It’s a little ridiculous how large Paige’s grin is but it’s okay, because Azzi’s smiling back, soft and shy. They’d look foolish to anyone else, the way they’re so intently gazing at each other through a screen as if there’s no barrier between them at all. 

“It’s gonna be weird going to the gym without you tomorrow morning,” Paige confesses after a second, moving to lay down on her stomach. 

“I bet. You’re gonna get absolutely nothing done without me,” Azzi teases dramatically before her eyes soften, “it’s weird that I’m not gonna see you at all tomorrow.”

There’s something gut-wrenching about that admission and yet, there’s something in it that heals a part of Paige’s heart that she hadn’t even known needed to be fixed. It means something to her that Azzi must feel it too. Because if she’s honest with herself, Paige had been just a little afraid that maybe the connection was just in her head, that maybe Azzi was simply tolerating her presence out of kindness. 

“You should just move to Minnesota,” Paige replies finally, “much nicer than Virgina or whatever.”

“Have you ever even been to Virginia?” Azzi asks, eyebrows raised as she flips herself to lie on her back, holding her phone above her in a way that lets Paige see entirely too much and yet not nearly enough. 

“No but it sounds boring as fuck.”

“Not with me,” Azzi says, biting her bottom lip sheepishly as soon as the words are out. 

Paige smirks, suddenly filled with a brand new confidence, “yeah? You’d make Virgina interesting for me Fudd? What would we do?”

Azzi licks her lips and Paige feels her mouth go dry. 

“We’d be together,” the younger girl says finally, averting her gaze as the depth of her words begin to make Paige feel like she’s being flooded by an ocean of emotions she’s not quite ready to feel yet, “anything can be interesting if we’re together.”

It would be so easy to come up with a sarcastic quip or tease Azzi for being a sap and yet there’s a certain sincerity in this moment that feels too fragile for Paige to feign nonchalance. 

“Is Virginia nice in the winter?” she asks finally, hands fidgeting with the hair ties secured around her wrist, “Minny’s a little too cold sometimes.”

Azzi’s eyes shine and Paige wants to try and read them, find the little clues hidden in her irises and solve the mystery lingering behind the crimson flush of her cheeks. But the truth is that Paige is a little scared of what she’d find, a little scared that discovering Azzi might mean discovering herself too. 

“You should come find out some time,” the brunette says, casual tone filled with intricacies of something far deeper. It’s the closest they’ve gotten to saying anything of actual substance and they tip-toe around saying what they both want, daring the other to ask first. 

“I dunno,” Paige says, determined to win the game, “I’m not in the habit of showing up to places without a proper invite.”

Azzi scoffs, “a proper invite? Are you expecting someone to send you a carrier pigeon with a gold letter addressed to her royal highness or something?”

“That would be nice,” Paige surmises and Azzi rolls her eyes.

“Does your back ever hurt from carrying that ego?”

“Only hurts from carrying my team.”

“Oh my god you’re so full of it.”

“Full of talent? Yessirrrr.”

Azzi huffs, “Paige.”

“Azzi,” Paige hums. 

“Do you wanna come visit me in Virginia during winter break?” Azzi says finally, a small smile playing on her lips like she’s okay with losing this game as long as it’s to Paige. 

“If I must,” Paige says dramatically, shrugging her shoulders and everything as Azzi lets out an offended squeak. But inside, her heart flutters at the offer, at the idea of seeing Azzi again, even if it feels like a lifetime away. Because as long as it’s Azzi on the other side, Paige and her impatient self can wait however long it takes. 

“Actually you know what nevermind, you don’t gotta come,” Azzi concedes bitterly,  scrunching her face (and Paige would never tell her this but she thinks Azzi looks just a little too cute when she’s mad and so maybe she riles her up on purpose)

“No takesies backsies Az,” Paige sing-songs before her lips uptick from a smirk into something more sincere, “hey Az,” she whispers, giggling to herself when Azzi pretends to ignore her, “I’d really like to come see you in Virginia during winter break.”

And as a brilliant grin dazzles across Azzi’s face, Paige realizes that her favorite thing about Azzi’s smile isn’t when her dimples show or when her eyes twinkle, it’s when it’s there because of Paige, when it’s there just for Paige. 

“Good,” Azzi whispers as they fall into a comfortable silence. 

There’s this serene sense of calm that laces itself around Paige’s nerves. Her normally fidgeting body is content to be perfectly still, an anomaly to her usual demeanor. The truth is that Paige isn’t the kind of person who’s okay with just existing; she likes to spend every second in motion, living out the high. There’s a part of her that’s scared of missing moments, scared that the people around her will leave her behind if she doesn’t chase them. But it’s different with Azzi. The younger girl makes Paige feel like it’s okay if she takes a moment to just breathe. Because Azzi will wait. Because Azzi won’t leave Paige behind. 

“Wait,” it’s a little while before Azzi pipes up, shaking Paige out of her thoughts, “what time is it?”

Paige’s eyes flicker to the time on her phone, confused by the line of questioning, “it’s almost 9 why?”

“Don’t you have a team party or something to go to tonight?” Azzi asks, face scrunching, “I swear you told me you had something tonight.”

“Oh-yeah- Amaya’s back to school thing,” Paige sheepishly scratches her neck, suddenly feeling itchy in her flannel shirt. She’d forgotten she was wearing that instead of her daily clothes. Hell, she’d forgotten she was supposed to be going somewhere in the first place, too occupied with other thoughts. 

“Bro get up,” Azzi orders, “you’re already late.”

“Nah it’s fine. I don’t think I’m gonna go,” Paige says and she thinks she should probably feel a little more guilty about it. 

“What do you mean you’re not gonna go?” Azzi asks in disbelief, “dude you’re the star of the team. You have to go.”

“Amaya will understand besides-” Paige drags in a deep breath, feeling vulnerable as the next words fall out in a quiet whisper, “I don’t wanna hang up yet.”

“Paige c’mon we can talk tomorrow,” Azzi tries to protest but it’s half-hearted at best.

“I wanna talk right now,” Paige argues, “you don’t wanna talk to me?”

For a second Paige thinks Azzi might just say no, might just chip away a little bit of heart with a well-intentioned rejection, but she doesn’t, “always wanna talk to you P.”

“Then don’t hang up. Talk to me.”

And Azzi does. All night. 

Two weeks laters there’s a letter, in an envelope with a picture of a carrier pigeon, that arrives in the Bueckers’ mail box. 

To her royal highness, 

Unfortunately I couldn’t find an actual carrier pigeon (I swear I tried) so this envelope and the mailman will have to do. 

~ You are formally invited this winter break to the Fudd family residence in Virginia. ~

(And you better show up Bueckers)

Yours, 

Azzi

February 2033

“I can’t believe you’re leaving me,” Ice whines petulantly as she makes herself comfortable on the couch across from where Paige is getting her makeup done, “this is parental neglect.”

Paige laughs, eyes closed, her makeup artist does her mascara, “you’ll survive.”

“You don’t know that” Ice argues, plucking a grape from the fruit basket before segueing into a rant about how boring Arlington, Texas is. 

Paige is grateful for the distraction her younger friend is providing. Her nerves had been on edge since the moment she’d woken up this morning, anxious to get the impending farewell press conference over with. She’d already started accepting that the Wings weren’t the right place for her but that feeling had only been heightened by her trip to the Valkyries. And ever since she’s come back, Paige feels a little bit like she’s sleepwalking through her final moments in Dallas. If she’s honest, she’s probably rushing things a little bit. There’s still plenty of time before she really has to move to Oakland but it had been her choice to move there as soon as possible. Paige had always been good at conjuring excuses and she had plenty as to why she needed to be in California so soon. But at the end of the day it isn’t about training or team bonding or any of the other hundred justifications she’s given anyone who’s asked. It’s about a little girl who’s eyes had been brimming with tears when saying goodbye, a little girl who had made Paige pinky swear that she’d be back as soon as possible. 

Really, Paige thinks she should be applauded for her restraint, because truth be told, the second Stephie’s lower lip had trembled, Paige had been prepared to ask Ice to just ship her stuff to Oakland so that she’d never have to let go of the little girl’s hand. 

And here’s the thing, Paige is willing to admit she wants to go back to the Bay Area for Stephie. It’s that pesky little part of her that’s desperate to go back for Stephie’s mother, to go back for one more hesitant yet lingering touch, that she won’t ever share with anyone else. 

“I never thought I’d live to see you and Azzi willingly playing together again,” Ice says as soon as Paige’s makeup artist leaves the room, “KK and I didn’t even try betting on it, we were that sure it wouldn’t happen. Shit I should have. I totally would have won.”

“Don’t y’all get tired of betting on my life?” Paige asks, rolling her eyes, trying to ignore the first part of what Ice said. 

“Betting on your life has made me hundreds of dollars bro,” Ice says, before a more earnest  look crosses her face, “but genuinely P, are you sure about this? There’s a lot of history there.”

Paige sighs, “it’s not about our history. It’s a basketball decision. And we’re both mature adults who know that. I’m just tryna win. Nothing else.”

“It’s never nothing when it comes to you two.”

“It is this time,” Paige argues adamantly and Ice raises her hands in surrender. 

“I just don’t want another set of teammates to have to deal with y’alls bullshit,” the younger girl teases, but it’s laced with a hint of seriousness that sends a flare of guilt shooting through Paige’s body. 

“Ice-” she begins.

But Ice is quick to change to a lighter subject, “can’t believe Jana’s the one that gets mom and dad back together. I always knew she was the favorite.”

“We didn’t have favorites,” Paige plays along, thankful for Ice and her ability to always keep the tension to a bare minimum. 

“Oh don’t lie. We all know you did,” Ice scoffs and then lets out a chuckle, “and now Azzi’s actually a mom. That’s kinda insane. And you met the kid right?”

“Yeah. Yeah I did,” Paige says and she can’t help the way her entire face breaks into a gleaming smile as her thoughts turn into memories of Stephie. She doesn’t even realize she’s gotten lost in a different world until Ice coughs, an amused grin playing on her lips. 

“You’re so royally fucked Paige,” Ice shakes her head, “the only person I’ve seen you smile that big for before is Azzi.”

“She’s a cute, smart, adorable kid, that’s why I’m smiling,” Paige tries to defend herself. 

“She’s Azzi’s cute, smart, adorable kid,” Ice counters. 

“That has nothing to do with it,” Paige protests again but it rings hollow to her own ears.

“Oh my god I needa call KK and get this bet started. It’s only a matter of time for real,” Ice says, more to herself than to Paige, as she whips out her phone, probably texting KK. 

“A matter of time till what?”

“You’ll find out Paigey,” Ice says gravely with a mocking smile, patting Paige’s head, “all in due time.”

***

The Dallas Wings media room is buzzing, reporters desperate to ask Paige questions and the blonde tries to maintain a smile despite the fact that her heart is lurching in her throat right now. Her opening speech had been short and sweet, parroting basically the same thing that had gone out on her social media the night before; she’d been desperate to just get it out. Generally, Paige is pretty good with the media, having been immersed in the spotlight since basically forever. The attention and how to maneuver it has always come naturally to her so she’s not sure why she feels so unnerved by it all today.  From the back of the media room, Ice sends her a thumbs up and a reassuring grin and Paige lets out a breath, glad to have at least that comforting presence with her. 

“Aidrian Ginsburger with Bleacher Report, Paige, you’ve obviously spent all of your career so far with the Wings, can you tell us a little bit about the impact this organization has had on you?”

Paige smiles at the question, letting her brain skim through pages and pages of fond memories she has of time spent with this team. It might be time to move on but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have plenty of cherished moments. 

“Yeah um- this place has really shaped who I am as a person. Since day one, the front office, obviously it’s a different one to the one I came in with, they did a lot to make sure that I was comfortable. My teammates through the years have been incredible and I wouldn’t be the player I am today without them. And of course the fans you know, they always showed out for the team, for me. Always supported me in anyways and I hope that I was able to give back the love to them that they always gave to me,” she says, suddenly nostalgic for the team that had started it all. 

The next questions are similar in nature and Paige’s answer varies only in words but not substance. She feels herself start to settle into it, now fielding the expected questions about the Wings and Valkyries with an air of confidence. There are a couple questions about Azzi that make her heart thump, but that was to be expected. It’s a pretty brilliant story in the making, two MVPs who used to play on the same college team coming together. Talia had warned Paige in advance that there was no avoiding it. But for the most part the questions have an easy answer about how Azzi’s a brilliant player and she’s excited to play with her old friend again. That is until a familiar hand shoots up and all the tension that had previously dissipated, comes roaring back with a vengeance. 

“Olivia Reynolds with the Dallas Morning News, Paige, as others have said today, you and Azzi Fudd played together at UConn and you were best friends.” Olivia’s eyes glint viciously, “I mean it’s pretty well documented how hard you tried to recruit her to UConn. But despite being best friends, the two of you have been never seen hanging out, outside of games and formal events, unlike your other teammates that is-”

“Is there a point to this?” Paige asks, hands fisting in her lap as she tries to keep herself calm. 

Olivia smiles, sugary sweet, “I was just wondering if maybe there was some tension and how that would affect your on-court chemistry at the Valkyries?”

“There’s no tension,” Paige lies through gritted teeth, “we didn’t hang out because we live far apart. There isn’t much else to it. And even if there was, Azzi and I are professionals. We wouldn’t let anything off the court affect our goal to win.”

“You lived far apart before UConn too, but that didn’t seem to stop you guys. What changed?” Olivia presses.

“Time did. Our lives did. There’s nothing sensational here. It’s just a case of two people drifting apart,” Paige says and the fabrication feels heavy on her tongue. If only it really had been that simple. 

“But clearly not that much,” Olivia says, and Paige glances at the moderator, desperate for an intervention, “there were plenty of fan pictures of the two of you out getting ice cream with Azzi’s daughter. It seems like you’re already fitting into that Bay Area life-”

“I’m not hearing a question at the end of your sentence,” Paige hisses and she can practically already hear the scolding she’s going to get from Talia once her agent gets wind of how this press conference had gone. The entire media cohort is watching the exchange with wide eyes, no doubt questioning whether they were embarrassed or impressed by their colleague. Ice is mouthing something to Paige, probably something along the lines of please keep your shit together, but Paige is steaming. Really, she should have expected this. 

“Well if you’d let me finish,” Olivia snarls, the façade of innocence dropping, “even if the two of you have drifted, as you put it, clearly there’s still a relationship there. How big of a role did Azzi Fudd play in your choice to move to the Valkyries?”

Paige sucks in a deep breath, nails digging into her palm at the question, “Azzi is the best shooting guard in the country. That was her role in my decision to move to the Valkyries. I don’t know what else you’re trying to imply, but I want to play with her because we play well together. That’s it,” she stands up and there’s pin drop silence, “thank you all for coming but we’re done with this press conference. 

***

Paige is seething as she exits the media room, Ice hot on her heels trying to calm her down. The sane part of her knows she should head back to the makeup room or even to her car, instead she finds her feet carrying her in the direction of where she knows Olivia Reynolds will be, reviewing her press conference notes by the coffee machine like she always is. 

“What the actual fuck was that?” Paige spits as she comes to a halt in front of the reporter. 

“I know you think playing basketball is the only job in the world Paige, but that was a reporter doing her job,” Olivia says, her calm and composed voice only furthering Paige’s irritation. 

“Bull-fucking-shit.” Paige sneers, “that wasn’t a reporter out there, that was my ex-wife grilling me like we were back in fucking divorce court.”

Olivia cocks her head, “oh so you do remember who I am to you then?”

“Oliv-”

“Because if you did remember, I’d like to think you’d have the courtesy to at least personally tell me that you were moving to your,” she drops her voice, “ex-girlfriend’s team instead of letting me find out with the rest of the world. You don’t think you owed me that?”

“That’s what this is about?” Paige sighs, “Olivia we’ve been divorced for almost three years now, I don’t owe you-”

“You didn’t owe Azzi anything either,” Olivia whisper-yells, the calm in her voice replaced by the same anger that had tainted the last year of their marriage, “but when we first started dating, you kept us a secret for months. You wouldn’t even tell your fucking teammates cause you were so scared she’d find out,” her eyes drift towards Ice who looks like she wishes she’d made a different decision rather than following Paige out here, “you said she deserved to hear it from you but apparently I don’t-’

“I didn’t mean it like that Olivia. Look, I meant what I said up there. There’s nothing between- ”

“Spare me,” Olivia says, as she stuffs her notepad into her bag, “you can lie to all those other reporters out there about how all of this is a basketball decision. You can even lie to yourself if you want. But you can’t lie to me, not when I spent four years fighting to keep our relationship from getting crushed under whatever it is that Azzi is to you.”

***

It doesn’t matter how far Paige burrows her head into her pillows, she can’t seem to stop herself from hearing Olivia’s words reverberating through her ears. The two of them had done well at co-existing in their social circles after the divorce had been finalized. While no one could quite call them friends, they’d done a good job at being friendly, being able to converse and share an occasional drink when in their combined friend group. And if Paige is honest, she knows she’s fucked up, knows she probably did owe Olivia a call. But calling Olivia would have meant calling someone who would inevitably make Paige face the truth, just like she had today. The truth that, even with the deal Talia had concocted with the Liberty hanging in the background like a dark presence, the move to the Valkyries was about a lot more than just basketball for Paige. 

She’s so entrenched in her thought that she doesn’t bother checking who it is when the facetime rings, irritation seeping into her voice as she answers it, face still buried in her pillows, “WHAT?”

“Miss Buecks?” a tiny voice comes through the phone and for a second, Paige thinks she must be dreaming, until she finally lifts her head to look at her phone, and Stephie’s small face lights up the whole screen. And it’s like she can feel little hands on her shoulders, slowly unknotting her tightened muscles. 

“Stephie,” she breathes out, a sudden sense of serene calm washing over her previously tense body. 

“Hi Miss Buecks,” Stephie says happily before she squints at the screen, “you sleep weird.”

Paige laughs, “and why’s that?”

“You’re not wearing pajamas and it’s only seven. ‘Dults don’t sleep at seven,” Stephie says matter-of-factly. 

“It’s actually nine here,” Paige says, a little surprised by the time; she hadn’t realized she'd been moping in her bed for that long. Ice had forced her to get lunch together, not wanting to leave Paige alone after the encounter with Olivia. Once she’d finally gotten back to her apartment, Paige had flopped on her bed, taking out her frustrations on her poor pillow. 

“That’s not poss-ble,” Stephie scrunches her face, “Mama’s phone says it’s seven.”

“It’s seven in California, it’s nine in Texas,” Paige tries to explain though by the way Stephie’s looking at her, she thinks she’s probably just confusing the girl more, “how’d you figure out how to call me babe?”

Stephie gives her an exasperated look, “Miss Buecks I’m five. I know how to use facetime.”

“And does your Mama know you're facetiming me?” Paige asks, eyebrows raised.

“She’s in the shower,” Stephie whispers, grinning sheepishly. 

As if on cue, Azzi appears on the corner of the screen and Paige feels her mouth run dry. The darker skinned woman is clad in a light pink fluffy bathrobe that ends right above her knees, giving Paige the perfect view of her long, toned legs that seem to shimmer despite the shitty quality of the facetime. Rivulets of water cling to her neck, delicately cascading down the valley of her breasts before disappearing from sight. And Paige must be dehydrated because never has she wanted to taste a drop of liquid more than she does right now. 

“Stephie,” Azzi groans, as she walks towards the phone and Paige gulps, heart beating faster with every step the other woman takes, everything about her becoming clearer and clearer, “what did I say about using my phone.”

“Only in em-a-gencies,” Stephie recites, “but Mama I had an em-a-gency.”

Azzi tilts her head, eyebrows raised as she gives her daughter a knowing look, “and what was your emergency?”

“I really, really, really, this much” Stephie stretches out her hands as far as they’ll go,  really, really, really, miss Miss Buecks.”

Paige feels her heart flutter. Stephie’s words feel like a hand carefully pulling her out from under the pile of stress she’d been buried under the whole day. It’s like the little girl is pushing away the rubble pressing against her lungs, turning the rocks into dust with a light touch and Paige feels like she can finally breathe. 

“Sounds like a pretty big emergency to me,” she says, relishing the way Stephie’s face lights up at the admission, “cause I really, really, really miss you too Steph.”

“See Mama,” Stephie says, placing the phone against a wall so can place her hands on her hips and look up at Azzi with a pleased smirk. 

Azzi rolls her eyes before glaring at Paige, “you’re a bad influence on her.”

“I’m the best influence on her,” Paige argues, sending Stephie a conspiratorial wink, “just you wait Az, I’mma teach her all the good things.”

Something unreadable flashes across Azzi’s face before she’s back to looking at Paige with an unimpressed arched eyebrow, “I am not letting you corrupt my daughter Paige Bueckers.”

“We’ll see,” Paige says slowly and Azzi shakes her head before turning to Stephie. 

“Alright Stephie bean time to go brush your teeth. It’s almost bedtime babes,” she says with a stern look 

“But Mama-”

“No arguing, you have school tomorrow missy,” Azzi reminds the little girl and Paige can’t help but marvel at the mother that Azzi’s become. And it makes her heart ache for the fantasies she’d dreamed of when she was in her early twenties. She’d always known Azzi would be a great mother; Paige had just naively thought she’d be there alongside her too. 

“Can Miss Buecks stay on the phone till I fall asleep?” Stephie asks, peering up at Azzi with big doe eyes, “please Mama pleeeease.”

“I’m sure Miss Buecks has other things-”

“I don’t,” Paige cuts in far too enthusiastically, clearing her throat to get back some semblance of restraint as both mother and daughter turn to look at each other, “I don’t have anything to do tonight so I can stay till you fall asleep Stephie.”

“YAYY,” Stephie cheers enthusiastically while Azzi studies her with a weary look, “I’m gonna go brush my teeth and then you can read me, my story Mama.”

With that, the little girl runs in the direction of what Paige can only assume is the bathroom, skipping with childlike joy as she sing-songs about something Paige can’t quite make out. 

“You know you don’t have to say yes to everything she asks right?” Azzi says slowly as she grabs her phone and sits on the couch. 

Paige shrugs, “I have time to stay.”

“Do you?” Azzi asks skeptically, “because from what I heard the Wings are having a little farewell party tonight, for you.”

Paige narrows her eyes, “and how exactly did you hear that?”

“I have connections.”

“You talked to Ice.”

“I talked to Ice,” Azzi concedes, “and I’m pretty sure you’re already an hour or so late for it.”

“Exactly. I’m already an hour late so why bother,” Paige says, sitting up so she can rest head against her headboard, “why were you talking to Ice?”

“I can’t talk to my friend?” Azzi asks slowly. 

“Of course you can but why specifically today?” Paige presses 

Azzi bites her lip, “I um- I watched your press conference today. You uh-” she averts her gaze, “you seemed really stressed at the end and I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

A soft grin upturns Paige’s lips before she can stop it, “were you worried for me Fudd?”

“That’s not-” Azzi groans, “shut up.”

Paige smirks, “you were worried for me.”

“I was concerned for my future teammate," Azzi huffs, “besides,” her face hardens, “she was way out of line.”

Paige sighs at the implied mention of Olivia, “maybe but maybe I deserved it.”

“No you didn’t,” Azzi protests and that oh so familiar protective tone in her voice carves itself into every crevice of Paige’s heart, “no one deserves to be put on the spot like that. She was being unethical trying to dig into your personal life like that.”

“This is nice,” Paige says softly, unable to help herself. 

“What is?” 

“Seeing you get all defensive over me. It's nice to see you still care. I didn’t know if you still did.”

Azzi’s quiet for a second, gnawing at her bottom lip as she looks at Paige, “I’ve always cared Paige. And-” she hesitates as the tightrope beneath them wavers, “I’m always gonna care.”

There’s years worth of unsaid words lingering in the silence between them as they breach some unspoken rule they’d both inadvertently agreed to. And they both know that they shouldn’t be saying things like this to each other, that they’re teetering on the edge of falling into an abyss that has nothing but destruction at the bottom. But Azzi’s words feel like sunshine, like heat waves across her skin and Paige is so tired of feeling cold. 

Before either of them can say another word, Stephie comes back into the room, crawling into Azzi’s lap.

“I’m back,” she beams, completely unaware of the way the two adults are scrambling to act normal around her. 

“Here baby,” Azzi hands the phone to Stephie, “take Miss Buecks to your room. Mama’s gonna go change and then she’ll come read to you okay?”

“‘Kay Mama,” Stephie complies, pressing a soft kiss to Azzi’s cheek before running towards her room. For a second Paige’s screen is blurred in motion until Stephie fixes her again and Paige catches a glimpse of Stephie’s room, specifically the walls that are painted the perfect shade of Valkyrie purple. 

“I love your walls Stephie,” she compliments.

“They’re pu-ple,” Stephie exclaims, “that’s my favorite color.”

“First the ice-cream, now the color, you’re stealing all of my favorites kid,” Paige teases but she’s secretly pleased by this revelation. It’s dangerous how fast Stephie’s starting to whittle down Paige’s walls and build herself a permanent shelf in Paige’s cabinet of my people. 

“Can I tell you a secret Miss Buecks,” Stephie whispers, bringing her lips closer to the phone. 

Paige smiles, “of course you can.”

“I think Mama misses you too,” Stephie says softly and Paige feels her heart catch in her throat, “I heard her tell Nanna on the phone.”

“Can I tell you a secret Stephie?” Paige lowers her voice, leaning into her phone. 

“‘Course you can Miss Buecks.”

Paige swallows as the admission falls from her lips, “I really miss your Mama too.”

I miss her always and I think I’ll miss her forever. 

“What are you the two of you whispering about,” Azzi’s voice cuts in as she tucks herself next to Stephie, a children’s book in her hand. 

“Nothing Mama,” Stephie says immediately, winking at Paige through the phone. 

“Yeah,” Paige echoes, ignoring her erratic heartbeat, “nothing Azzi.”

Azzi looks between the both of them, clearly aware she’s being left out of something, but doesn’t push further. Instead she flips open the book, pulls Stephie closer into her arms and starts reading. If anyone were to ask Paige later, she wouldn’t have the faintest idea about a single word in that damn book. Because as Azzi’s soothing voice begins to lull Stephie to sleep, and the younger girl, despite her yawns, holds the phone up so the blonde can be included in every second of it, Paige feels herself being pulled into a dream she has no right to dream. She dreams of being in Stephie’s purple bedroom. She dreams of her and Azzi lying against Stephie’s lilac bedspread, their hands entwined in the middle over Stephie’s little body. She dreams of a forever that she’d long forsaken.

[absolutebl]

10 BLs That Shook Me

@trribledelight asked for "BLs that made you think or learn smthg or shook you culturally? Eg the political considerations in Not Me..."

Let's get the rough ones out of the way first, shall we?

1 2gether

Green. One of the most egregious reps for punching down humor against femmes in BL (and there sure are a lot out there). Seriously GMMTV? Must you?

At the time we all watched this because there wasn't anything else to watch, and it's been a long time since I bothered with a rewatch, but Green is one of the reasons I just can't with this series.

I'm not knocking the actor, but the character and how the other characters behave around him, and the director with regard to this aspect of the plot and portrayal was rough going.

What shook me was how casually homophobic 2g was. It was just so odd to watch a gay romance gloss over and degrade queerness. I was like, wait, aren't they supposed to me on our side?

(Ah, the before times.)

2 Fish Upon the Sky

Shall we address the head wrap in the room? This BL has some of the most shockingly racist content I've seen in a long time. Also punching down humor. I fast forwarded through it and I still don't want to think about it. GMMTV should be throughly ashamed of themselves... Again. I was shook, but in a bad way.

Okay, now for the ones that shook me in a good way.

3 Until We Meet Again

I watched this early in my Thai BL journey (while it was airing) and I had no idea what to expect. Frankly, you could watch it now and still not know. It's just very unusual for a Thai BL.

The plot twist about how they each ended up reborn. Just so brilliant. I still can't get over it. So simple. SO CLEVER. So punishing for the families.

Fantastic!

4 Secret Crush On You

This one kinda shook me all along but that Daisy & Touch scene. It lives on in my head rent free forever. Just because it was so beautifully sweet and genuine and kindly towards a femme character.

I still don't like this BL.

But I love that scene in it.

5 My Beautiful Man

I went on a JOURNEY with this show. Mostly because I didn't think Japan had it in them to land something this complex. But they managed it beautifully by not shying away from the delicious messy ugliness of it all.

Possibly the greatest final episode in all BL.

And from Japan. Usually so bad at endings.

I remain gobsmacked.

6 Unknown

I shouldn't have been shooketh by this one but I really was.

The style of it while staying so down home and gritty.

How old school Chinese BL it felt yet it still managed to be very modern BL about it.

The execution and quality of the acting.

How it was aired (available in YouTube?! we NEVER get that from Taiwan!)

Also the pair branding. We haven't gotten this level of pair brand from the leads in a Taiwanese BL since SamYu.

I'm was absolutely riveted by everything about this show and its production.

I loved seeing it. I hope we get more BLs like this from Taiwan as a result.

But I ALSO hope they realize that a big factor in the popularity and the success of this show was in distribution.

It's what's for dinner.

Along with the stepbrother trope.

KOREA'S SUPRISES

I watch a lot of Kdramas as well as BL, and have done for a really long time. I'm riveted by Hallyu, from an entertainment industry perspective (what I wouldn't do to get my hands on some of their proprietary data). I also listen to a ton of Kpop.

Therefore, Korea dominates the P'ABL gets shooketh list because I had (and have) more expectations firmly in place around Korea's media product sfyle than anyone elses. Even before they started to make a big play into the BL scene.

My favorite BLs from Korea, like Semantic Error and Light on Me are EXACTLY what I expect from them, manufactured perfection. But I was also shook more times by Korea than other BL nations because I had such rigid expectations.

7 Color Rush

Yeah yeah. But it starred an idol. It started out pretty and stiff and everything I was expecting and then the concept hit me up side the head and I never recovered from the CLEVER of this show. I'm not used to my Kdramas or my BL being this high concept and SMART about their sanitized perfection.

8 Blueming

What with the 8th Sense and others since, Blueming seems to have been somewhat forgotten about. But at the time, I was shook by the down home grit of this show. By the actual pain from the characters. By the higher heat concept. By Korea actually going THERE.

And then these babies came along...

9 The 8th Sense

I just didn't think Korea had it in them. Yes, I realize now that it was a bit navel gazey, and we were weighted heavily towards the seme and his pain. I would have liked a better balance between the leads, but that's in retrospect.

At the time I couldn't believe it. A KBL dealing with mental health?

And can we talk about those sex scenes? How insanely comfortable the actors were with each other? How easy in each other's personal space? I've not seen anything else quite like that from Korea. It's super rare. I had assumed they, culturally, just didn't do casual intimacy, or if they did, it wasn't allowed on screen.

Of course now I know the CAN do it, I want more.

10 Love for Love's Sake

Okay, lots to unpack with this one. A genuine isakai BL, in the original sense of the term. The death twist didn't shake me up, but the execution, acting, open gayness, and a couple other things did. Enough to make me still think on this show with fond surprise and affection, despite its undercurrent of darkness.

I like to be shooketh.

(source)

[sams-butt-dem0n]

i loved ur hc about breaking up with the gang! could you do the gang breaking up with reader?

The Gang Breaking Up with Reader

DARRY would have the simple excuse of not having enough time for you due to his busy work schedule and taking care of his brothers in the small amount of spare time he had at the end or beginning of each day. You had tried to convince him that you didn't care that the only time you got to spend together was in bed after a long day, but he wasn't having any of it.

"I'm sorry," he says. "I really am. I don't want to do this but it's only fair."

"Darry, how often do I have to tell you that I don't care about you not being here all the time? I enjoy the time we have together already and I know that you're busy and stressed but that's okay. I love you. Please don't do this to me."

"I'm sorry," he repeats, turning to look away from you. "I'm heading off to work in five minutes. I want you out of here before I get back."

SODAPOP would hate to have to break up with you but he feels like it's the right thing to do. It's definitely due to his lack of self-confidence in a relationship since he found out about Sandy cheating on him and moving away. Don't get me wrong, he's confident in his looks and everything but when it comes to relationships, he tends to beat himself up about every tiny detail.

"Y/n, I gotta tell you something," he says, his voice quieter than usual as he stands at your front door.

"Yeah? What's wrong baby?" You ask, confused as to why he was at your house when you were supposed to be at his place in less than an hour.

"Please don't call me that. It'll only make this harder."

You were really confused now. "Huh? Soda what are you talking about?"

"I can't do this anymore." He says, straightforward as ever.

"What?" You ask, tears welling up in your eyes. "Why? What are you doing? Did I do something wrong?"

"I don't know. I don't know if you did something wrong. Tell me if you did won't you?"

"Soda, you sound crazy right now," you say. "Talk to me, don't do this."

"I can't. I just can't How do I know you aren't two-timing me, huh?"

You were shocked at what he just said to you; appalled even. "You think I'd do that to you? You really think that low of me?"

He stays silent. You nod, close your eyes tightly and when you open them again, a single tear rolls down your cheek.

"Stay there," you say, walking away from the door and leaving him standing there for about 5 minutes, wondering if you were ever going to come back.

You dump all of the shirts and jackets and little crafts he'd given you in front of him on your patio and throw a plastic bag at him afterwards.

"I can't believe you think I'd do that," you said. "So much for trust."

PONYBOY was nervous when he realised he wanted to focus more on school than on his relationship. He didn't want to disappoint Darry with his grades dropping since he was with you. He felt as though you held a restriction against him from succeeding even though he knew you weren't in his heart.

"Y/n," he says to you as you're walking him home.

"Yeah?" You ask, turning your head to look at him.

"I- um. I have something to say but I know you won't like it."

"What is it?" You ask. "You can tell me anything, I promise I won't get mad."

"I want to break up." He says, bluntly.

"What?" You ask, stopping dead in your tracks, his house is only a few hundred yards away.

"I need to focus on my schoolwork and you're not letting me do that," he explains, angering you more and more by the second.

"What do you mean I'm not letting you do that? Pony, all we ever do Is read and study whenever we're over at each other's houses," you reply. "And the one day a week where we aren't studying, we spend some time together and out with the gang. Just like everybody else on a Saturday."

"Just respect my decision," he says.

"Respect? Why should I?" You ask, getting angrier by the minute. "You want me to respect you breaking up with me for pretty much no reason because the one you 're giving me makes no sense."

"Just go home," he snaps before turning around and walking away, leaving you standing there, tears rolling down your face.

DALLAS would break up with you right after he gets out of the cooler. He had convinced himself you were cheating on him with Sodapop, similar to Sylvia. You had gone over to Buck's the second you had found out he was free again and walked in with a huge smile beaming across your face. However, when you opened the door, Buck gave you the dirtiest look he could before mumbling something under his breath and watching you walk past him and up the stairs. Weird.

"Hey, Dal!" You exclaim, opening the door and jumping onto his, wrapping your arms around him. "I missed you."

Usually, he would hug you back and kiss you on the head, telling you how much he had missed you too; even when he was only in there for a couple of nights. This time, he shoves you away from him, anger displayed across his face.

"Dal?" You ask, confused. "What's wrong? Did something happen while you were in the cooler?"

"You tell me, y/n. You tell me what happened," he says, snarling at you.

"I- I don't know what you're talking about. I haven't done anything. At least, I don't think I have," you say, trying to think if you had done anything wrong in the three weeks he had been gone.

"Don't pull that shit!" He yells, scaring you and making you jump a little. "I know what you did, you little whore! I know you fucked him!"

What the fuck was this guy talking about. "What!? I didn't fuck anybody! I haven't had sex since a few nights before you got done in, and that was with you."

"Oh, bullshit!"

"Who did I fuck then, huh? Who are you convinced that I slept with?" You ask, yelling in his face, hurt in your eyes.

"Soda."

You almost laugh in his face but remember that probably would be the smartest thing to do.

"Seriously? Soda?" You say. "You really think I would do something like that? How could you?"

"How could I?" He yells. "How could you! You fucked my friend!"

You shook your head and scoffed. "I don't know why I bother. You're clearly not listening to me and you don't want to believe me. Ask Soda about it and then you'll see that I have not laid a finger on him."

JOHNNY breaks up with you after weeks of weighing up the pros and cons. He felt that you were too good for him and someone with a life as messed up as his doesn't deserve someone as perfect and as gorgeous as you.

"Johnny?" You ask, seeing a figure lying on the concrete in the lot as you're walking home late from the drive-in. "Is that you?"

"Y/n," he says. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry?" You smile, helping him up onto a bench, sitting beside him and holding his hand. "You have no reason to apologise."

"I do, though," he says, hesitating before continuing. "I can't keep doing this."

"What do you mean?" You ask, worry clouding your eyes.

"I can't keep doing this. I'm constantly embarrassing you when we're out together; I can tell that people make fun of you for dating me. I'm nowhere near good enough for you. I can't sit here and watch you waste your life away for someone like me. You deserve some rich, fancy soc like Randy or Bob."

"Johnny, what the hell are you talking about?" You say, letting go of his hand. "I love you more than anything. I don't care what anybody else thinks and if you think that I should then why? Why should I care? if they saw you the way that I do then they'd all understand."

"I've made up my mind," he says, not bothering to look you in the eyes as he gets up, his back facing you. "And there's nothing you can say to change it."

With that, he walks away, leaving you sat on the bench with hot tears streaming down your cheeks, leaving red lines on the skin. Cold. Lonely. And confused.

STEVE has some trouble with girls. He always ends up saying the wrong thing and, similar to Johnny, he feels that you are way too good for him to treat you the way that he knows he eventually will. He knows damn well that one day, you'll get sick of him being a dick and leave him anyway, just like everyone else. So why bother waiting until then when he could just end it right now?

The phone rings. "Hello?" You say, picking it up after a couple of dials.

"Hey, babydoll," Steve says, his voice making you smile.

"Hi, handsome," you reply. "What can I do for ya?"

"I have to talk to you about something," he says. "But I want you to hear me out first."

"O...kay?" You say, confused about what is about to happen. "Am I in trouble?"

"No," he chuckles. "But I know I will be soon."

Your smile drops. What is he doing?

"Firstly, I want to tell you how much I love you. I think you are the most amazing woman I have ever met and I want you to know that this is not your fault and I have loved every moment with you." He says, making a tear form in your eye. You know what he's doing.

"Steve," you whisper.

He never shows his emotions like this. the most he's ever said to you is that he loves you and thinks that you're the most gorgeous broad he's ever seen. He has never admitted his feelings this extremely before.

"I can't let you be with me anymore. I don't want to be a part of your life anymore. I know I'll just ruin it. I'll be over tomorrow morning to pick up my stuff. I love you, y/n."

He hangs up. You hold the phone to your ear and drown in the continuous beep of the ending line. You had never been so hurt in your life.

TWOBIT breaks up with you because he finds someone else. I know this makes him out to be a bad person but I feel like he has so much love for you but when he meets this other girl, he knows that if he loved you as much as he thought he did, she wouldn't have sparked so much interest.

"Two," you say, looking up at him. "Who's Kathy?"

He lowers his head, looking at his hands in his lap. "Shit, baby."

"Just tell me," you say, a tear falling onto your cheek.

"She's a girl I met a few weeks ago," he admits. "I bumped into her at the dingo while I was waiting for you and the gang and I realised that I liked her. I'm so sorry"

"Do you love her?" You ask.

"What?" He says, looking at you with watering eyes himself.

"You heard me," you say. "Do you love her, Kieth?"

You only ever called him Kieth when you were upset or angry. Right now, you were both.

He nods, "I think so."

You say nothing and stand up, picking up your bag, putting your shoes on and taking one last look at him. One last look at the man you thought you would spend the rest of your life with. The man who had made you so much happier in the three years of dating you had been through.

And you leave. Never to speak to him or your friends, the gang, ever again.

[letstalkaboutfandomsbaby]

**Ahem ehem** slides over 5 boxes of sweets more cow reader content pls:D

Yall're gonna make me gain 20lbs i swear

CW: fem cow hybrid reader (reader has breasts and a vagina), bull hybrids, F/M/M/M/M, smut, pet names, vaginal sex, double penetration, handjobs, oral (male receiving), creampies, cumshots

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"Y/N~" cooed one of the bulls as he slipped beside you. "Where ya goin?"

"To the field," you replied, pointing to the pasture behind the barn.

"Mmm, what're ya gonna do out there?"

"Dunno," you shrugged. "Maybe take a nap. It's really nice out today."

"Mmhm, it is. I'll come with you. Pretty thing like you shouldn't be out there on your own." You laughed breathily, brushing him off. You knew what he was trying to do.

"Ah, you don't have to. I'll be okay, I'm just going to that tree over there."

"But that's so faaaaar. I'll miss you if you go that far away." His hand found your waist, giving your soft flesh a squeeze. "Cmon, lemme go with you and keep you company."

"Oi." The two of you turned to see another one of the bulls approaching you. "He botherin you, sweetcheeks?"

"N-No..."

"Yeah right. He's trynna get you alone, huh?"

"Was not."

"Was to. It's fuckin obvious yer trynna keep her to yerself."

"Fellas, fellas," called out the third bull as he came back into the barn. "No fightin, not in front of Y/N. Yall promised to share."

"Yeah," chimed in the fourth bull as he snuck up behind you, wrapping his arms around you. "This heifer is all of ours, not just yours, 'kay?" The first and second bulls huffed, crossing their arms, looking away. The third bull sucked his teeth, smacking the other two's shoulders.

"Lighten up. Yall agreed to this last week. Quit poutin and suck it up."

"Hmm so where were ya headed, Y/N?" the fourth asked.

"Out to the field... u-under the tree. I was gonna take a nap."

"Yeah? Why dontcha take a nap in here, pretty?" He pressed his hips into your backside, his cock twitching against your ass. "We could all take a nap together."

"I dunno... I kinda wanted to take a nap alone..."

"Whaaaat? Why's that? Dontcha wanna cuddle with us, princess?" asked one.

"I-I do, but—"

"But nuthin, baby girl. Let's all sleep here. We can cuddle up in here where it's nice and cool, don't that sound nice?"

"I dunno..."

"Come oooooon, Y/N," cooed another. "Let's go to bed in here, have a nice lil nap before dinner."

You weren't given the chance to choose: the four bulls were already dragging you along to your pen, surrounding you on all sides.

"So... who do ya wanna sleep next to?"

"Um—"

"She's sleepin by me."

"And me."

"Now hold on, yall got to sleep next to her last night! We should have a turn."

"Yeah."

"Y/N likes sleeping by me the most, dontcha, pretty?"

"Well—"

"Shut up, you don't know shit!"

"Look who's talkin!"

"W-Wait!" you shouted, grabbing all of their attention. "Please don't fight, it makes me sad. I hate when you guys fight..."

The four bulls softened at that, sighing and glancing at each other.

"We're sorry, baby."

"Yeah, we didn't mean to upset you."

"We just... we all just like you so much."

"Yeah, and we just wanna spend time with you."

"We're sorry."

"I forgive you," you muttered, "just don't do it anymore, okay?"

"Okay, princess."

"We promise to do better."

"Okay... thank you."

"You don't gotta thank us, sweetcheeks."

"Yeah, we should be thanking you."

"...What for?"

"For lettin us do this." The bull behind you cupped your tits, giving them a gentle squeeze. You gasped, tensing under his touch.

"W-What?!"

"Mmm, yeah, and for this." Another bull reached out, cupping your pussy in his large hand, grinding his palm against you.

"W-Wait! You said we'd take a nap!"

"We will, we will."

"But we can have some fun first, can't we?"

One bull grabbed your ass, another ran his hand over his stomach. Their big hands started roaming your body, kneading your plush flesh. You whined, squirming under their touch.

"Aww, look at her."

"She's so cute."

"Just wanna eat you up, princess."

"Wanna spoil you."

"Wanna make you feel good."

Before you knew it, you were maneuvered into one's lap, his thick cock prodding at your cunt. Two of them slowly lowered you down onto his cock, the third one kissing you and swallowing your moans. Once you adjusted to the first, you felt another bull behind you, his fat cock prodding at your cunt as well, stretching your poor hole.

"W-Wait! I can't fit two of you!"

"Cmon, baby, let's just try."

"Bet it'll feel soooo good, pretty."

"Lemme just—"

The head of his cock popped inside of you, making you gasp. You scratched at the bull's shoulders below you, moaning as the second bull pushed in slowly, filling you to the brim. You whined once his hips met yours, feeling sooo full.

"There, look at that. It fit just fine."

"Ahh... I-I can't do this—"

"Shhh, just breathe baby. This'll feel so good in a minute."

The two bulls pulled out, pushing back in and making you gasp for air. They started slow, pumping in and out of you, taking your breath away with each thrust.

"Hey, cmon, sweetcheeks. Ya got two hands, dontcha?"

The other two bulls guided your hands to their hard cocks, coaxing you to wrap your fingers around them and start jerking them off. The four of them rocked against you slowly, low moans filling the room as they used you for their pleasure. One of them starting rubbing your clit, another one rubbed your nipples. You became a moaning mess within minutes, gasping and whining as they filled you up your cunt and hands. One of them gently turned your face towards his cock, pushing the head past your lips. You sucked the head of his cock for a minute before the other bull pulled you off, directing your head towards his own cock and pushing it into your mouth.

You didn't know how long it all lasted or how many times you came. All you knew was that you were feeling such an intense pleasure that you were on the verge of tears.

"Oh god—"

"Shit, gonna..."

"Me too."

"Gonna cum in you, baby."

"Gonna cum on your face."

"You want it baby?"

"Want our cum?"

"Beg us for it, princess."

"Beg for our cum."

You were feeling faint, but somehow you managed to form words.

"P-Please! Cum in me, cum on me! Want it, want it so bad! Give it to me, please, please!"

"Aw fuck—"

"Atta girl—"

"Gonna give it to ya real good—"

"Open wide, sweetcheeks—"

You barely processed what happened next. All you knew was that you felt fuller, and warm liquid spilled on your face and chest. Loud moans and groans filled the barn, almost deafening. Hands smoothed over your skin, wiping your face as they pulled their cocks out of you. You felt kisses on your cheeks as you wiped your eyes, whispers of love and praise filling your ears.

"Such a good girl."

"So proud of you."

"Thank you, princess."

"Made us feel so good."

"Always feel so good with you."

"Love you, baby."

"So fucking much."

Moments passed, and suddenly you were being moved again, onto another bull's lap.

"Now it's my turn to be inside that pretty little cunt."

"Me too!"

"Wanna feel your mouth, baby."

"Just lick me real quick, pretty, that's all I want."

You were in for a long night.

───────────────

[xotaemintol]

MARKHYUCK X FEMBLACK READER //APT.// <PT.1>

♡ “All you gotta do is meet me at the…” ♡

[She/Her pronouns, plus size friendly. Warning, this fanfiction will contain; heavy drinking, cursing, drunk sex, oral sex, vaginal sex, kissing, unprotected sex, implications of cheating, and more. Part one contains; Heavy Drinking, stripping, and cursing. If any of these things are triggering for you, please look away, thank you.]

[What is APT? 아파트 (AH/PA/TU), is an Korean drinking game. Two players or more stack their hands and chant: “아파트, 파트, 아파트, 파트, 아파트.” as they wave their hands, alternating them between each other. One player picks a number and another counts, as this player counts everyone moves their hands to the top starting from the bottom. The player with their hand on the top takes a shot and the game continues.]

(Please ignore any mistakes 😭 this was deleted 2 times, and I’ve rewritten all of this from memory, so bear with me. I’m also debating on finishing this, but you let me know what I should do.)

Leave it to Jisung Park to cancel plans he made at the last minute. You should’ve known better than to listen to him when he said he wanted to join Mark and Haechan to throw you a small house warming party. Not even 30 minutes later and he had already backtracked.

“Sorry, I can’t make it tonight, another night okay?” He said. You could strangle him. You had ordered enough food to feed four grown men, and just as you expected, he canceled.

But, luckily for you Mark and Donghyuck were on their way. They sent a text to the groupchat reassuring you that they’d be coming tonight, unlike Jisung.

You sigh and grab three shot glasses to sat them on the coffee table. Placing them down you smile. At least you can count on the two of them, so you don’t feel too bad. It’s not even 15 minutes after their text that you hear your doorbell ring, excited, you squeal and rush over to the door as you call out in a singing tone; “Coming!”

You check the small monitor beside the door, just to be sure that it’s them before—just as you assumed, it is. With a large smile on your face you open the door and squeal happily.

“You came!” You hug them both as Mark laughs. “Duh, we told you we were.” Haechan says jokingly in a snarky tone.

You roll your eyes playfully and look down at the bags in his hands. “Whoa, is that just alcohol?” You ask. Mark nods, “I told him we don’t need that much, but he said-“ “What’s a house warming party without enough alcohol to kill a bear?” You laugh and nod your head in agreement as you step aside to let them in.

Mark shakes his head, they take off their shoes by the door and you lead them back inside.

“It’s just the three of us though, we can’t drink all of that.” Mark agrees with you, but Haechan only waves the two of you off. “It’ll be fine, you can keep whatever you don’t drink tonight—think of it as a gift from your favorite man.” You snicker and sit down on the floor in front of your couch.

They look around the apartment for a second before sitting down. “Damn, this might be nicer than my place.” Mark says. You scoff and look up at him with a smile, “You mean your hundred billion dollar apartment? Yeah, right.” Haechan grunts softly as he sits on the couch beside you.

He sits the bags down on the table and begins to empty the contents out. “Might be? Mark could spend ten billion dollars and his apartment would still suck compared to yours.” You watch as he empties the bottles out of the bags. “What? Why?” Mark asks. Haechan look at him with a smug expression and says; “Because, your apartment doesn’t have a pretty woman.” He says simply.

“Yours doesn’t have one either.” “Says who? Y/N comes over all the time.” “Sure she does. She basically lived with me before she moved.” The pair continue to bicker, but your attention shifts to the sheer amount of alcohol Donghyuck bought. Silently, you count the bottles.

‘1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11…’

Your eyes widen and you turn to Haechan saying; “How much do you expect us to drink tonight? Aren’t you both lightweights?!” Mark immediately disagrees, so does Donghyuck. “Don’t worry, we’ll figure it out.”

_

After giving them a tour of your apartment, you decided that it would be nice to watch a movie while waiting for the food to come. None of the three of you had even acknowledged the bottles of soju sitting on the table. You were too busy trying to figure out what to do next to beat the settling boredom.

“Let’s watch another movie.” You suggest, “There’s nothing to watch.” Donghyuck states. You hum softly as you scroll through the endless movies on the screen. “Terrifier?” Mark immediately disagrees. “Absolutely not, it’s just gore and cruel and unusual punishment.”

“Ballerina?” “We watched that last month.” “A quiet place?” “No, we watched that too.”

You continue going back and forth with Mark until Haechan finally speaks up and says; “Let’s play 아파트!” You turn to look at Haechan and with a confused expression you ask; “What’s that?” He grins.

“A drinking game.” He slips off the couch and sits on the floor beside you. “So, we all put our hands on top of each others and go ‘아파트 파트, 아파트 파트,아파트 파트.’ And then we start move our hands up to the top of the stack and then who’s ever hand is on top has to drink.” You stare at Donghyuck slightly confused, slowly nodding your head with a puzzled expression.

He shakes his head and sucks his teeth. “Mark,” he says, “Come here.” Mark—seemingly already knowing what the game is, sits beside you on the floor and rolls his eyes. “Look, we’ll show you.” Mark puts his hand in the middle and Haechan places his hand on top, Mark puts his hand above Haechans and then Haechan puts his other above Marks.

“Okay, now—since I suggested the game, we say ‘Hyuck’s game, Donghyuck game, game start’ and then we wave are hands like this.”

To demonstrate, they begin waving their hands while alternating which one is on top and which one is on the bottom while chanting; “아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트.” When they stop Haechan’s hand is on the bottom, while one of Mark’s is on the top. “Okay, so since my hand is on the bottom, I pick a number and Mark counts.” You nod and watch. “9.” Mark rolls his eyes and sighs before counting to nine.

“1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9.” After counting Mark’s hand is on top again. “Since Mark’s hand is on top he has to take a shot, and then it’s his turn to choose and I count.” He says, “Sounds easy, right?” You nod, this time fully understanding.

“Yeah, easy when he isn’t cheating.” Mark mutters, “There is no cheating, you’re just bad at the game.”

_

After just 20 minutes Mark is 5 shots deep, you’re 4, and Haechan is only 1. You quickly realized after your third shot that Donghyuck is strangely good at this game, and Mark is strangely bad at it. Luckily, it was your turn and you were really starting to grasp how to win.

“아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트!” The three of you chant, your hand ends on the bottom and you look over at Haechan with a grin. His poker face is killer. He’s been so calm this whole time, laughing as you and Mark—mostly Mark, filled your glasses to the brim and took shot after shot. But you can’t let him win, so before shouting out a number you think. You glance around you for a second before hesitantly shouting out; “7!”

Mark begins to count and you nervously move your hands upward. “5, 6, 7.” “YES!” You jump up as Donghyuck’s hand lands on top. You laugh as he presses his tongue against his cheek, chuckling as Mark pats his shoulder. “Bottoms up Hyuck!” You tease.

You quickly sit down and pour his shot, pouring until the alcohol is almost overflowing. “Drink! Drink! Drink!” He laughs in amusement at your cute reaction and takes the shot to his head. Just like the first one, he makes it look easy.

As he sits his glass down you gasp and lean onto Mark in a playful manner, you place on hand on his chest and the other on his thigh. "Watch out Mark," You say in a fake whisper; "I think he's planning something." But Mark doesn't respond. His foggy mind is distracted by the smell of your lotion.

Usually he's used to you being so close, but in his impaired state he feels a little shameless. His desire to get a better smell of your scent is a little stronger than his morality, so, he leans in close to smell you a little more. But, just as he does you turn around and look at him. He flinches back and quickly looks away from you, turning red from his neck up as he nervously laughs.

"Be careful, we can't let him win." You add. Haechan, who watched silently laughs and adds in a teasing tone. "Yeah Markie Pooh, don't let me win." You snap your head over to Haechan and jokingly poke his chest as you glare at him. "I'm watching you, don't get cocky Hyuck." He smirks and looks down at you with his eyebrows raised. "Watch all you want," He says. "I don't mind."

You laugh and roll your eyes as you sit up. "Alright. Let's keep going."

The game continues and once again the three of you begin the chant. This time, Mark's hand is at the bottom and Donghyuck counts. Just as expected your hand ends up on top. "Damn it!"

You grab your glass and Haechan fills it to the brim. You huff and quickly down the drink, "Alright! Let's go." Haechan laughs and nods.

"아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트!" This time, his hand is at the bottom. "8." Haechan calls out. Mark inhales deeply and begins to count. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8." You silently prayed for Donghyuck's hand to end up on top—but, conveniently for him, this time it's Mark.

You grab another bottle of soju and fill Mark's shot glass. The game continues like this for another five minutes until it's finally Haechan's turn to drink again, but before taking his shot he looks at the two of you and says. "Let's make this more fun." "How?" You ask. His grin tells you that he has a mischievous idea in mind.

"Let's strip after every shot." He suggests. "What?! No!" "Okay." Your reaction is completely different from Mark's. In your mind, the added element of stripping would add a million times more thrill to the game. Currently, there isn't much at stake other than a hangover for everyone. But stripping, adds a certain type of excitement and risk that would make this game even more fun.

As you turn to Mark you ask; "Why not?" Donghyuck leans over your shoulder and repeats after you asking in a teasing tone; "Yeah Mark, why not?" Mark rolls his eyes but before he can respond you say; "C'mon Mark, it'll be fun!" Mark looks at the both of you for a second, the mischievous look on Haechan's face and the excited one on yours spell danger, but—he agrees either way.

"Okay, fine." "Yes!" Haechan takes his shot and this time, instead of continuing the game, he begins to peel his shirt off his body. As he does so you watch with wide and surprises eyes. As he does so you watch with wide and surprises eyes. You grin as he tosses his shirt aside and reach to touch his chest, but he covers his body with his arms and stops you.

"Uh, uh! This isn't free ma'am!" He says jokingly, "But for you..." He moves his arms and allows you to freely touch his chest. You laugh as your hands roam his chest saying; "I love this game." You look over at Mark and grin. "Sorry Mark," Your hand pauses for a moment and you give him a fake pout. "But I hope you lose."

"What?! Why?" Mark asks with a laugh, you grin and shrug your shoulders saying; "I gotta see how much you have in common with Spider-Man." He scoffs and rolls his eyes, but Haechan laughs at your joke.

"Whatever, let's keep playing."

Again the chanting starts. "아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트!" Now that the stakes have been raised, every time the word leaves your mouth your hands feel sweater and your heart seems to beat a little faster. A mixture between excitement and anxiety fill your drunken body, and when your hands finally stop—with yours at the bottom, you almost jump up in excitement as you yell out; "YES!"

They laugh at your excitement, but as soon as you throw out a number, Mark's laughter stops. Donghyuck counts and your hands begin to move. "3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10." "DAMN IT!" Mark curses as his hand ends up on top, but you can't help but cheer. "Yeah baby! Strip! Strip! Strip!" Haechan laughs loudly at your reaction and at Mark's loss as he pours him a shot, only filling the glass half way this time.

Mark huffs loudly and takes it, he slowly drinks it down and then slams the glass on the table. "Take it off! Take it off! Take-" You stop and cover your mouth as he glares at you playfully. You retreat to Haechan and lean your back against him while chanting a bit quieter, "Take it off, take it off." Haechan now following along behind you to further antagonize Mark.

Reluctantly, Mark slowly strips himself of his shirt—only to reveal a white tank top underneath his T-shirt.

“Aw man! What the hell?” You roll your eyes in annoyance and sit up. Mark can’t help but laugh at your reaction. “What?” He teases, “Were you that excited to see me naked?” With zero hesitation you say yes. “Why are you wearing two shirts anyways?” “I always wear an under shirt.” You roll your eyes and look away from him.

“Yeah, alright.”

The game continues and this time Mark’s hand is at the bottom, the two of you stare at him—waiting for him to shout out a number. You can tell he’s nervous from the way his eyes dart around. His cute smile as he thinks gives you butterflies.

“Uhm, 12!” You laugh and shake your head as you begin to count. “1, 2, 3…” You slowly, the anticipation is killing Mark, but entertaining for you and Haechan. “7, 8, 9, 10, 11…” You laugh, knowing that it’ll be on Mark again and finally say 12. Mark groans loudly as Haechan bursts into laughter.

“Take it off! Take it off!” This time, you’re fully expecting him to take off his shirt. But of course not. “Socks count as clothing.” Mark says. You whine and roll your eyes. “What?! How! That’s not even fair!” Haechan stops you and says in a calm tone. “No no, let him take of his socks.” “After that, he’ll have to take his shirt off.”

You look at Donghyuck and softly gasp in excitement. “You’re right!” Mark laughs in disbelief at the both of you and takes both his socks off.

As the game starts again you feel even more determined. Maybe it’s the alcohol, but the room suddenly feels a bit hotter. Tension rises with every second but it only makes the game even more entertaining.

Your hands stop again, but this time Haechan’s hand on the bottom.

In a relaxed manner Haechan calls out his number; “7.” Both you and Mark, are expecting him to have set up Mark to take his shirt off, it only makes sense. Nervously, Mark begins to count, but unexpectedly, your hand ends up on top. “NO!” Mark laughs as he claps his hands. “Ha!” Donghyuck joins him and pours your shot.

“Whatever, youll end up taking it off either way.” You take off your shirt and then drink the alcohol in your glass. When you sit it down the two of them are shamelessly, staring at your breast.

“If you’re gonna stare at least don’t make it so obvious.” You joke. “Hey, it’s not my fault your heart is behind your breasts.” Haechan says, you laugh and playfully shove him as Mark sits silently, turning red as he tries his hardest not to stare.

“Okay, let’s go.”

This time, the chanting is a lot slower. The game feels more fun, but you also feel a little anxious. Sitting between the two of them like this isn’t completely out of the ordinary, you’ve changed in front of them more times than you can count on your fingers and toes—but something about this, the energy and the heat radiating of their bodies makes it feel different.

“아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트…” repeating the process, only this time you’ve picked the number—Haechan counts and your hands move. Your breathing becomes deeper and slower. Finally, your hands stop and to your luck, Mark’s hand is on top .

You high five Donghyuck before pouring Mark’s shot, only filling it half way. “Drink up.” Mark shakes his head and picks up the glass. He takes a second before sipping it down, and when it’s all gone he sits it down then slowly slips his shirt off.

He tossing his shirt next to yours, before he can say anything your hands are already on his body as if they have a mind of their own. He doesn’t even stop you. Instead he watches with a smirk on his flushed face

“Are you happy now?” He asks, you nod and look at him. “Very.” You respond. He leans his head back and smiles with his tongue pressed against his cheek, “You act like you’ve never seen us without a shirt on before.” Haechan says. “Yeah, but usually y’all act like I’m a criminal for looking.” Mark grabs your hands and raises his eyebrow at you. “You’re acting like one.” He says playfully.

You laugh and put your hands up. “Can you blame me?” “Yes.” Again, the game starts. “아파트 파트, 아파트 파트, 아파트 파트!” The pace picks up again as excitement builds and your hand is on the bottom. “13!” Mark counts, his speed also picking up. “9, 10, 11, 12, 12!”

The two of them cheer loudly as you hand lands on top. “Let’s go!” Mark shouts, they high five and laugh—but after you’ve taken your shot they both realize what comes next and their excite smiles slowly fade.

“Oh, wait. You don’t have to-“ Before Mark can finish you stand up and begin unbuttoning your pants. “Rules are rules.” You shove your pants down, trying not to let your underwear get caught—when they’re down to your calf’s you place your hand on Haechan’s shoulder to keep your balance.

You struggle to get them off your leg, it only hits you now just how drunk you are. Luckily, Mark notices and helps you. He looks up at you as he slowly slides the pant leg down your calf, the look in his hazy eyes is a mixture of embarrassment and arousal. Your own reflection almost the same thing.

You look down at him a little longer, staring into his eyes as the tension stirs—quickly becoming sexual. It’s only when Haechan clears his throat that you look away. You chuckle anxiously and stumble a little as you place your other hand on Marks shoulder so you can get the other leg down. But just as Mark did, Haechan helps you get it off.

Placing one hand on your foot and the other on your knee, just above your shin he looks up at you with a look similar to Marks. A confident one, one that’s equally as sexual. His hand slowly slides down your leg to push the fabric off your—now, warm skin. When it’s bunched up at the bottom he pulls it all the way down then tosses them to the side with his own shirt.

Slowly, you sit down with the help of Haechan and inhale deeply.

“Should we keep going?” He asks, you nod your head and then look to Mark who seemed to be waiting for your answer before giving his own. “You aren’t gonna quit now, right?” Mark shakes his head. “What about you?” Haechan shakes his head as well. “Okay, good!”

You clap your hands together and put them in the middle, they quickly follow suit—in your stomach the heat you felt becomes a scorching sensation. As you move your hands the tingling sensation in the depths of your body becomes stronger.

“9.” Mark says. As he slurs his words, Haechan counts to nine. Mark moves his hand, then you move yours, then Haechan, then Mark, then you, then Haechan, then Mark, then you again, and finally Haechan.

Standing up Haechan licks his lips and slowly pulls the strings to his feet sweats loose. As they come undone you feel a soft throb between your legs, you watch shamelessly. Too intoxicated to pretend that you hadn’t ever thought about a moment like this. He slowly shoves them down his thighs, his face turning red as the bulge in his underwear is put on full display.

The moment you notice it you feel a sensation similar to having to pee, that heat quickly turns into a wetness.

Neither you or Mark make a comment about the erection in his boxers. At this point, you’re sure Mark must be on the same page. It’d be pointless to point it out.

“Should we keep going?” Mark asks, before Haechan could answer you respond for him. “Why would we stop?” Both your words are slurred. “Exactly, I’ll be damned if I’m the only one exposed tonight.” Donghyuck sits down and you laugh a little. “See, this is why I’m glad I don’t have a penis.” You comment, “What does that mean?” Donghyuck asks.

“Exactly what I said.” You look at him, but his expression makes you look away immediately. His eyes are low and the grin on his face makes you feel unbelievably horny. “But anyways…” You clear your throat and sit up. ‘Relax.’ You think to yourself. But the feeling between your legs is so intense already.

“C’mon, you said we should keep going.” Everyone places their hands in the middle again, but now, there’s no chant. You move your hands and when your hand is on the bottom, you give a number and silently pray that it doesn’t end up in you being completely bare. “1…2…3…4…5…6..7…8…” To your luck, Mark’s hand is on the top. This time, he doesn’t reach to grab his glass; instead, he stands up and unbuckles his belt.

Again, you sit mesmerized. Admiring the way his hands look as he yanks his belt through the loops, even in your drunken state you can still recall all the times you’ve thought about being on your knees in front of him as he took his pants off.

His belt hits the floor with a loud clanking sound, but you don’t look away to see where it landed; you’re too busy watching him remove his pants in a rushed manner. You lick your lips as you see the band of his boxers. Just like Donghyuck, when he’s finally removed them you can see that you were right. He’s in the same boat. The erection in his boxers is as clear as day…..

[ilovebubblegum]

Playing House (Joel Miller X Reader)

Pairing: no-outbreak!joel miller x f!reader

Warnings: fluff, sweet joel, domestic joel, rom-com

Summary (Series): reader as Joel’s neighbor. Joel’s wife left him so Joel asked his neighbor for help in babysitting Sarah. 

Summary: Zoo date with Joel and baby Sarah ended up in agreement to play house? What more could you ask for?

Words count: 1.7k

A/N: I’m trying to make this as a rom-com, hope you like my new series! This is part 3 of Where It All Starts. But it can also be read as a standalone. I'm beyond happy that many of you liked it so I hope you enjoy the next parts. Stay tuned and love you!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20

It had already been a month since you babysat Sarah and you got closer to Joel. You spent almost every dinner with him. You even spent your weekends with him and baby Sarah. Joel and you probably even attached to each other at this point.

“We’re going to the zoo, yayy!!” You extended your hand to the back seat hyping up Sarah who was sitting in the baby car seat. 

“You excited, babygirl?” Joel turned his head to look at Sarah before he drove.

*Sarah giggled*

“She’s definitely excited.” You laughed and looked at Joel.

“Seatbelt?” Joel reminded you.

“Right.” You grabbed the seatbelt and wore it.

“Okay. Done.” You told Joel.

“Alright. Let’s go.” Joel put his hands on the steering wheel and drove to the zoo.

At the zoo

“There’s so many people here.” You said as you cradled Sarah on your chest while waiting for Joel who was setting up the baby stroller.

“Maybe because it's the weekend?” Joel shrugged.

“Yeah.” You nodded and looked around.

“Ready?” Joel asked as he put the baby bag on his shoulder and held the baby stroller.

“She’s sleeping? Want to put her here?” Joel offered to put Sarah in the stroller.

“I’ll hold her for a while.” 

Joel went to buy the tickets while you sat on the bench with Sarah. She slept so soundly so you decided to put her in the stroller.

“You got it?” You stood up as Joel was walking towards you.

“Yep.” Joel pushed the baby stroller and walked to the entrance with you.

It had been a while since the last time you went to the zoo so you got excited. You remembered when you were a kid you went to the zoo with your parents almost every month. You loved animals so you always asked your dad to bring you to the zoo. 

“I missed this feeling.” 

“Going to the zoo?” Joel raised his eyebrows.

“Yeah, I used to go to the zoo every month with my family.” You chuckled.

“Glad I asked you to come.” Joel smiled.

“Thanks, Joel. I feel like a kid again.” You stroked his muscly upper arm.

“You’re welcome.” 

*Baby Sarah babbled*

“Someone is awake.” You walked forward and crouched to see Sarah.

Joel stopped and crouched beside you. 

“Hey, babygirl. You want to see around?” He caressed Sarah’s cheek with his index finger.

*Sarah giggled*

Joel lifted Sarah from the stroller and carried her with one arm while the other arm pushed the stroller.

“Give me the bag. I’ll carry it.” You wanted to help.

“No, no. It’s heavy.” Joel refused.

“Why don’t we put it in the stroller?” You suggested.

“Oh, yeah. Right.” You took the bag from Joel’s shoulder and put it in the empty stroller.

*Saw a lion*

“There! Look sweetie, it’s a lion.” You pointed at the lion. Joel turned Sarah so she could see.

“Roaarr..” You roared and made a claw gesture to Sarah. 

She just stared at you confused. 

“She has no idea what you’re doin’.” Joel laughed. 

“Yep. She didn’t even flinch.” You laughed.

“We should bring her back here again when she’s bigger. I’m sure she won’t remember today.” Joel added.

Joel froze for a second. He thought to himself, “I did not just say that.”. He was embarrassed with the words he just said. Did he just ask you to come to the zoo with him and Sarah a few years in the future? Did he just include you in his future? He was flustered but he had to act cool.

“Yes, she’s too small to remember. But she looks happy now.” You stroked Sarah’s head who was resting on Joel’s chest.

“I haven’t seen monkeys. Where’s the monkeys?” Joel tried to change the topic.

“Wait. Let’s see the map.” You looked at the map and found where the monkeys were.

“Here.” You pointed at the location and guided the way.

You and Joel walked around the zoo and enjoyed the moment. You introduced various animals to baby Sarah even though you know she didn’t understand and she wouldn’t remember it. But it was fun and important to interact with the baby so you did it anyway. Joel also interacted with Sarah, he made animals sound to her and you laughed at him. 

The day at the zoo was really fun. And you couldn’t stop thinking about what the waitress from the Mexican place said. She said that the three of you looked really cute as a family and even said you two made a beautiful baby?! You actually got butterflies when you heard that. You had always liked playing house when you were a kid so you enjoyed this moment with Joel and baby Sarah. You felt like you were spending your weekend with your family with a husband and a baby daughter. It felt real and you liked it. You wondered what other people thought when they saw the three of you. Did they see you and Joel as a married couple with a baby? The thought itself made you giggle but you tried your best to hide it. For a moment, you forgot that you weren’t ready to commit to a relationship.

“Do you want to sit for a while and get somethin’ to eat?” Joel pointed to an empty seat and table.

“Yeah, I’m kinda hungry.” You put your hand to your stomach.

“Sit here.” Joel dragged the chair for you to sit.

You moved the baby bag from the stroller and Joel put Sarah in the stroller.

“Hot dog?” Joel asked.

“Yeah, anything.” You nodded.

“Okay, wait here.” Joel nodded and walked away to buy hot dogs.

While waiting for Joel, you pushed the stroller back and forth so Sarah could sleep.

“Here.” Joel passed you the hot dog.

“Thank you.” You grab a bite to the hot dog.

Joel and you talked as you ate. Joel suggested that you sit for a while and rest. 

“Joel..” 

“Yeah?” 

“Do you remember the last time we met my ex that morning months ago? I haven’t talked to you about it..I-uh-I’m sorry I let him believe we were married. I just-I just want him to believe I’m happy without him. I mean I am happy. I’m sure you heard me that day. Well, long story short, he cheated on me. So I hate him so much.” You rolled your eyes as you tried to open up to him.

“I totally understand. You don’t have to apologize. He’s a jerk. Let him believe we’re married, I’m your husband, that’s okay, as long as I can help you.” Joel’s words touched your heart. How could a man be this sweet?

“Thank you, Joel.” 

“I-uh-I also haven’t told you about Sarah’s mom.” 

“Wait, I have a confession to make.” You stopped Joel.

“Confession?” Joel raised his eyebrows.

“I actually overheard you and Sarah’s mom on the night she left.” You confessed.

“Oh..Yeah so she left us. We had a shotgun wedding and she decided to leave 3 months after Sarah was born. Said we’re not meant to be together. Doesn’t want a baby and everythin’.” He sighed. 

“You deserve better, Joel.” You put your hand on top of his.

“Thank you.” He smiled at you.

“You know what? Should we keep doing this?” You lightened up the mood.

“Do what?” Joel was confused.

“This. Us playing house.” You pointed at him and yourself back to back.

Joel raised his eyebrows, pouted his lips and nodded. 

“Should we make a contract?” You joked.

“Contract? I don’t follow.” Joel rested his chin on his palm.

“You know. Like in movies where they make contracts for fake relationships and stuff.” You explained. Joel nodded as he listened to you trying to digest what you were saying.

“At least we could do it in front of our exes. You did that for me. I’ll do that for you too if you want me to.” 

“That sounds fun.” Joel was interested in your proposal.

“So should we write a contract now?” Joel asked.

“No, no. I was just joking. How about just a verbal pact?” You laughed.

“Deal.” He stretched his hand to you to shake your hand.

“Alright, Mr. Miller. Deal.” You shook his hand.

*baby cries*

“Time to eat.” You laughed.

Joel took the baby bottle from the baby bag and put Sarah in his arms to feed her. 

“You hungry, huh?” Joel looked at Sarah as he fed her.

After Joel fed her, he stood up and put Sarah facing away from him to help her burp.

“Can I do it?” You offered.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to.” 

“I want to.” You insisted.

Joel passed Sarah to you and you placed Sarah on your chest facing back. You supported her chin on your shoulder and gently patted her back. After one or two minutes, she let out a burp. 

“Good girl.” You chuckled.

“Oh!” You suddenly felt damp on your shoulder.

You turned away to show your back to Joel.

“Is there something on my back?” You asked Joel.

“Uhm..Yes..” Joel didn’t know what to say.

“What is it?” You panicked.

“I think Sarah just dribbled some milk on you.” Joel rubbed his mouth.

“Uh-oh.” You put Sarah back to the stroller and tried to look at your back.

Joel quickly got some tissue and helped you wiped the milk on your shoulder and hair. 

“Here. Why don’t you change into this?” He took off his outer flannel shirt and gave it to you. He was now wearing only a white shirt.

“Thank you.” You went to the restroom to change and went back to him and Sarah.

“It looks like I’m wearing a dress.” You chuckled.

“You look cute.” Joel praised you but his voice was so small. 

He didn’t want you to hear him. You heard him anyway but you acted like you didn’t. In fact, you were blushing. You and Joel continued wandering around the zoo, joking and laughing until the zoo closed then you went home.

“Today was fun.” Joel said as he parked the car in the driveway.

“I had a great time. Thank you.” You reached his hand and gave a slight touch.

“She’s sleeping.” You whispered as you looked at baby Sarah in the back seat.

“We gotta keep quiet.” Joel whispered and chuckled.

“I’ll wash your shirt and give you back tomorrow?” You pinched the shirt. 

“Don’t worry about that.” 

You went home smelling Joel’s shirt and giggled. His woody, musky, masculine smell gives you comfort and you wished you could keep it. But you had to give it back so you gave it a last smell before you put it in your washing machine and got back to reality.

To be continued…

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