#you need to pay for my therapy

[daughterofthesunlands]

Currently watching Rings of Power episode 8 of S2 again and why as soon as I heard Annatar's voice did I go:

*immediately trying to contact the middle-earth police*

[your-senpaaaai]

so are we gonna talk about how mirror pieces around jinx’s face are literally in the form of warwick jaws ???? like omg ?????

[whotfevencare]

i wake up i think about them i eat i think about them i go out i think about them i post about them i text people about them i talk about them i listen songs i think about them i read books i think about them and at last i go to sleep only after reading few pages off the book only to see them again in my nightmares

the good omens hyperfixation Will Not Leave. these idiots are just inhabiting my brain every second of every day. i keep slapping their sticky little hands away from my prefrontal cortex ‘cause i need to focus on something other than these pathetic gay old men (men said in a “gender-neutral, supernatural entities that exist beyond human comprehension” way) and they just Keep! Coming! Back!!

neil gaiman i am in your walls and i am Weeping™️

[obsessedoverwater]

Sometimes the doomed old man toxic yoai gets so bad you just have to start writing about fucking revenge guac to get over the pain.

[starfruitsomething]

🥲

[evanzbuck]

You were there for him when I couldn't be. That's what matters.

[occasional-hobbyist]

Thats how i imagine Saga's gallery of photos looks like

[nexusmonstrum]

"I've actually grown attached..." -Philza   

[n1ghtwr1ter]

At the end of my latest TLT reread and it’s been physically painful attempting to read the last 40+ pages of Nona. Like, the short shrift that Gideon/Kiriona gets given by the people in the story…the theoretical good guys who honestly only see her as a thing, as a means to an end with an inconvenient dead soul attached to it… It makes me want to rip my own heart out of my chest.

Nobody has cared about Gideon her whole life. Most people, in fact, if they remembered about her at all, went out of their way to tell her how much they wished she didn’t exist. In the final chapters of Gideon, she finally gets the thing she’s been desperate for her whole life: somebody telling her that they need her, they care that she exists, and they badly want her to go on doing it. This allows her to make peace with the prospect that at the ripe old age of 18, she needs to die so that that person can go on living and living and living, using the castrated remnants of her soul as fuel to do so. Not a great way to go, but at least Gideon would get to be useful to somebody, would get to be remembered for something.

And then she wakes up in the wrong body, and finds out that her sacrifice - her attempt to be useful in the most selfless way possible, in that her self will no longer exist - has been rejected. And not only that, but the person she tried to give herself to - the one who was supposed to care about her - went to extreme lengths to make completely sure that she no longer remembered about Gideon.

She literally cut Gideon out of her brain.

And now, drifting along in the worst sort of half life where she’s inhabiting her body but it’s no longer really hers, in very obvious fashion - there’s holes in it, her heart is missing, and it’s got her shitty father’s handprints all over it (not even touching how much of a violation that is), indelibly - she finally meets back up with the small group of people who could theoretically be relied upon to be glad to see her again.

But then the one who was supposed to care about her most tries to kiss her (massively OOC for Harrow), and turns out to not even be there - it’s some weird baby inhabiting her body, and doing a really shit job of it too. The rest of them won’t stop talking about how they need her to break into the Tomb - as if she was just another key, same as the ones they worked together to acquire in Canaan House, just bigger and more inconvenient - and/or how they both fucked and killed her mom, who also (surprise, surprise) wished that Gideon had never existed, but saw her as a thing that needed to be done for the good of the mission.

Ultimately, they all make it abundantly clear - Palamedes, Camilla, Pyrrha, and especially Nona, all these people who are supposed to be kind and good and right - that they would prefer she wasn’t there. That it just be her body, with no Gideon attached - at least not Gideon the way she is now, broken and rejected and miserable. They would all far have preferred that she not have her own inconvenient thoughts and feelings and desires and impulses - that she just be inanimate and let the important people, the grown ups, get things done.

They wish she didn’t exist. Same as everybody else in her life, save one, and now she’s left wondering whether Harrow really meant it at all. Because if she did, she wouldn’t have left Gideon to Kiriona’s fate.

And honestly? Really, truly? I know everybody in the fandom loves Pal and Cam and Nona and Pyrrha, but in the end I couldn’t give less of a shit about them. They are fucking side characters, and as intriguing as Nona has been from a worldbuilding standpoint, I ultimately resent having been forced to read 400+ pages of filler bullshit about fucking side characters. I am a butch, and I’m here for my sarcastic, loving, angry, vulnerable, forgiving, and yes, inconvenient sword butch. I’m here for Gideon. But Gideon has been fridged for the last two books of the series in which she is supposed to be a, if not the, main character.

And it feels like almost nobody else in the fandom feels the same way, which, fine. I’m used to that. I’m also used to being told I’m projecting; and I’m used to being told that I’m inconvenient too, in my thoughts and my opinions and the mere fact of my existence. I spent the first eighteen years of my life being told I was inconvenient. Yet another point of overidentification with Gideon.

But in case anybody still thinks that Nona proves that Gideon was an asshole all along, think about all of the above. Think about how it would make you feel to come back from not just death but from the erasure of your existence, something you chose in order to save the life of someone you loved, and be told that you’re inconvenient. Think about how you’d feel if you’d been told all your life that it would be better for everyone if you didn’t exist. And then tell me that Kiriona isn’t in the right and that I should give a rat’s ass what happens to literally anybody else.

It’s Kiriona Hours up in this House, butches. We’ve spent long enough caring about people who would prefer we weren’t around. For once in our entire lives we were told we were important; we were told we mattered; we were told we were the main character. We were going to, if not get the girl and save the world, at least get to do something real, something important, something like being the hero.

But that’s over now; we’re back to being wrong and bad and inconvenient thanks to the simple fact of our existence. So it’s time to embrace it. Let’s be a little shit. Let’s be kind of a dick. Let’s have our own agenda, let’s play our cards close to our heartless chest, let’s allow our circle of empathy to contract to ourselves and maybe one more person. That’s where I’m at right now. And I don’t see that changing anytime soon.

[baker-chan-senpai]

just some fluffy serirei for the soul

[cavotarchives]

You see, I'm a time-traveler, and my partner Cavendish died on the job. So I went back in time and saved him. But now that means there's two me's, two Dakotas in this time period and only one Cavendish, and you can't do that.

MILO MURPHY'S LAW (2016-2019) 01x17b | Island of Lost Dakotas

[orviposition]

singshong can't fool me anymore. i know romance when i read it

yjh: use stage transformation and kill the resurrected lee hyunsung, lee jihye, kim namwoon and gong pildu

lhh: 🥺🥺 b-but pookie you'll be sad

[esmes]

[over-dvse]

Cutely walks by Hey darl, if you draw Isaac being ghosted by Chris I will finish the nevaac fan fic faster!! struts away even more cutely/j

this brought me REAL pain to draw. i hope you are happy. *sniffles*

[elcoffin]

god knows how many feelings I FEEL listening to this track (imagining aemond ofc)

it inspired me for this one drawing, i tried to capture ma boy in the moment of despair + i feel like rain adds quite drama vibes too, so hell yeah

try not to cry challenge, because my eyes literally became freaking waterfall while i was drawing and listening and imagining and FEELING..,,oohh my heart,,

[sparrowinthewater]

Gwynriel headcanons that must become CANON in the next acotar book

(please skitter away if you hate this ship, thank you :D)

A flashback to Azriel’s POV when he rescued Gwyn from Sangravah

A flashback to Azriel’s POV when he found out that Gwyn had been thrown into the Blood Rite

More Valkyries training scenes with trainers Az and Cass!!!

Spy missions with our spy master Azriel feat. his spy apprentice Gwyn

Detailed depictions scattered throughout the 900-page novel (yes, it better be 900 pages long to compensate for the toll this wait is taking on our mental health or else i am suing) on the evolving relationship between Azriel and Gwyn (trainer/trainee > friends > more than friends > confidants > what are we? > lovers > and finally, mates)

Azriel’s shadows playing cupid for their extremely clueless master

Azriel lets Gwyn take her time in exploring her sexuality and is extremely respectful and sweet and patient throughout her trauma healing journey (trainer Az in the pit and in bed OK BYE)

Badass Carynthian and Valkyrie Gwyn saving Azriel during a mission or in a battlefield

Gwyn feels the first tug of the mating bond before Azriel does and she keeps it a secret because she knows of Az’s unresolved feelings for Mor/Elain (MISS SARAH PLS GIVE ME ANGST)

Gwyn showing Azriel that he is more than worthy of love by constantly peppering him with hugs and kisses and words of affirmation because let’s face it, Az’s main love languages are probably touch and words of affirmation

A deeply emotional scene of Azriel finding out that Gwyn (kind, brave, loving, loyal, and beautiful Gwyn!!!!) is who the cauldron has chosen for him after centuries worth of waiting and yearning (I need this alone to be at least 5 pages long)

Gwyn falls first but Azriel falls HARDER