#you look like a man o lantern
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As Andy Stitzer said, cocksucka mothafucka! I hate you! I hate you! Sorry! I'm sorry! I never curse. You pulled on 2; why would you pull on 2?! Stop smiling! Stop smiling! You jerk! Oh Mika, you should burn in hell....OH NIPPLEFUCK!!!
I reached out to a provider that would be perfect for me. She advertised, like Lilac, that she took my insurance. I emailed her twice and left a voice mail.
I decided to follow up; since she had openings today. I would love to get in. She then told me, yeah I don't accept your insurance.
WHY IN THE BLUE FUCKING FUCK WOULD YOU SAY YOU ACCEPT AND INSURANCE ON ALL OF THE PLACES AND WEBSITES YOU HAVE POSTED IT; ONLY TO NOT TAKE IT?!?!
Happened to me twice in the time from of 18 hours. That's all I needed right now. I am done. Finito. My brain is fried, it's mush. It could be eaten with Fava beans and a nice chianti. Wow, what a dark joke hahahahah. I need a break. I cannot take any more mental stress. I'm not looking anymore for the time being.
"You look like a man-o-lantern!"
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the-acid-pear · 8 months ago
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Something that always pissed me off about DSaF is how it acts like your physical exterior is a moral failing, which is echoed by the characters but only ever reinforced instead of subverted. Biggest L from the writing imo.
#luly talks#started thinking of this again bc someone pointed out word of god said henry looks like that in the game's style (despite being a Normal#White Man) as a representation of how evil and non human he is which is like WHAT THE HELL MAN!!! THAT'S MEAAAN#like changes in looks to represent someone is evil isnt an issue when its 1) A WILLING CHANGE 2) ACTUALLY TIED TO THEM BEING EVIL#see: jack in pure evil doing his jack o lantern shit#like how are Jack or Dave Bad People™ for just DYING.#''the outside always ends up matching the inside'' BABYGIRL I LOVE YOU BUT STOP TALKING BULLSHIT!!!!#like tje only case where i dont mind this is w Davetrap bc the bnnuy shit is a direct consequence of his actions#like a mark of shame if you squint you'll see me wag my tail because im remembering one of my favorite blonde men#im not gonna specify bc its a tasteless comparison if you think of it too long but its basically the same#he was only put there bc of what he did and bc he wouldn't stop it was not an accident or a tragedy#but hell this shit of hating ppl based on their looks extends to ANYONE like Dee is straight up A Good Woman and is hated cuz she. weird#MATT TOO like okay. matt isnt a good person. he has some shady shit going on. BUT IT DOES NOT WARRANT HOW HATED HE IS BC HE'S ''CREEPY''#and pf course the phoneys esp Jake w ''i was a monster'' though that's the only case i can think of where its like#self perception and not some bloke going holy shit you're so ugly i dont trust you#prob more examples but i havent played the game in too long so Y'know.#dsaf
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hiraya-rawr · 2 years ago
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— oh and by the way im married (zhongli) .
synopsis !! zhongli neglects to inform his friends that he's married.
contains !! they/them reader but referred to as wife, comedic dialogue
Z H O N G L I
Perhaps it's the fact that you've been married for centuries that informing others didn't seem to be a priority for Zhongli.
It wasn't obvious either. He had his day job and you had yours. To regular couples, the amount of distance you two spend would be a little strange, but time is something you have in abundance so it didn't really matter when you spend a few days apart doing your day jobs.
It was Hutao who brought it up the on the evening's Lantern Rite dinner.
"Aiyaya, it seems like everybody alive and dead has a date for this year's lantern rite."
"Hahaha! And here we are celebrating a feast with new and old friends. It doesn't sound like much of a loss to me." Venti laugjs, pouring himself a drink that threatens to overflow from his hand.
"I'm not saying it's a loss, I'm simply wondering wouldn't some of you want to spend the night with a special someone?" She smirks, eyes scanning the group. Chongyun coughs into his cup as Xiao averts his gaze from the troublemaker.
"If you're asking for my opinion, I'd say everyone here is quite special to me," Lumine smiles warmly before glancing at the two archons and yaksha, "I'm sure there's still time for dating in the future. We're not that old."
"Well. . ." Hutao turns to Zhongli. He raises a brow, placing down his cup.
"May I ask why you're staring at me, Director Hu?"
"No reason~ It's just, as your boss, of course I'm a little bit concerned. Aren't you wasting your youth by not going out on dates, mister Zhongli? I'm sure there's a line of Liyuens who would love to–"
A burst of laughter comes from the green bard. "Oh, him? On a Lantern Rite date with someone else? (Name) would surely kill him."
"(Name)?" Everyone questions.
"Huh? He didn't tell you?" Venti tilts his head.
Zhongli coughs, "Ah. . . Please don't be concerned about my dating life, Director Hu. After all, I am already married."
Silence.
A cup drops.
Tea spills (literally).
Then,
"Married?!" The restaurant shakes as Hutao and Lumine jolt upright, hands slamming the table.
"Married." Zhongli confirms.
"What! For how long? When? What's their name? Why have you never–"
Zhongli hushes, trying to calm his boss from jumping over the table. His face dusts a light pink, perhaps embarrassed by the whole ordeal.
"For a few. . . years now. As you know, they're (Name). And as for why I never mentioned my wife. . ." He glances at the crowd, ". . . I simply forgot."
"You. . . forgot," Xingqiu slowly repeats.
"Yes, it seems I've forgotten to inform everyone. Then again, is it not obvious that I'm a married man?"
Chongyun covers his face in his hands, processing the whole ordeal, "Thinking back. . . mister Zhongli always had a domestic kind of aura. It seems so obvious now."
"Wait, wait, wait! How come I didn't know about this? We work together almost everyday! And why does Venti know! Didn't you two just met! Do you even have a ring?" Hutao interjects, flabbergasted as Zhongli and Venti freezes.
In truth, he does have a ring. One he carved himself made of only the most precious of jade and metal. It has rested under his glove for centuries—
Under his glove also hides his draconic arms, golden veins against dark brown, almost scale-like skin. Proof of a entity greater than human.
"Ehe. . . about that," Venti nervously looks away, "I've actually. . . met his wife before!" He covers up, voice laced with enthusiasm.
"Yes, yes, my wife is quite fond of Mondstadt's songs. They've frequently visited the nation before."
"And you don't come along?" Xiangling asks.
"I don't."
The group blinks.
"And what about the ring? I never see you wear a wedding ring." Hutao narrows her eyes.
"That's because I don't wear it." He answers bluntly.
". . . and you never introduced them to us because. . .?" Lumine questions.
"Because . . . I haven't had the time to?"
Hutao rests back on her chair, her eyes glazed in judgment, "No offense mister Zhongli, but you seem like a terrible husband. If you don't get your act straight, I'd say your marriage won't last."
His jaw drops. Venti laughs.
|| ko-fi support / character m.list ||
~ bonus ~
"Darling, am I a terrible husband?"
"No? What makes you think that?"
"No reason. Although I believe we should try dating publicly."
tumblr has been deleting my last paragraphs why
//for some reason tumblr has been deleting my last lines in drafts so i have to type this so my last sentences wont get deleted
"No reason. But perhaps it's about time I show you off to the public more."
ko-fi support | character m.list
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iloveboysinred · 2 months ago
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Toji would never admit it out loud, but he’s always been a halloween enthusiast. More so when you started your little family together, giving him the perfect opportunity to watch as you tenderly brushed Tsumiki’s hair back into place for her ballerina costume, fluffing out her tutu and delicately tying the big pink bow around her waist. and he swears he had heart eyes when you helped little Megumi adjust the felted ears of his werewolf costume, hot ironing the cheap fabric to make them stand up straight, the little boy’s eyes sparkling as he looked in the mirror.
Costumes were just one of the family activities Toji secretly enjoyed partaking in. As hard as he tried to act indifferent, you could see the childish light in his eyes when he came back to the house after taking your children trick or treating, surprising you with his own small bag of candy.
It was such a bittersweet feeling to see Toji, a grown man competitively carve out jack-o-lanterns and trade candies with your two children. It was adorable, but it hurt to know he never experienced these simple pleasures in his own childhood.
You giggled when he came in to your room, claiming it was time to do laundry while wearing a fuzzy blue and purple monster onsie (one he had sworn up and down he would never wear) and plopping into bed with you. The kids were already asleep in their beds, the candy they had acquired safely stored away in cabinets and their jack-o-lanterns outside glowing dim as the night progressed, it was a rare quiet moment where it was just you and him. He leaned into you on the bed, lazily picking up the remote and choosing to play a vintage halloween movie, the little horns on his hood flopping as he laid against your cheat, his arms wrapped around your middle.
The movie droned on as the two of you were whisked away into sleep, deciding then that Halloween was your favorite holiday and that you’d experience it every day just to see your husband’s eyes light up like that again.
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Art by @/avicrafty on ig
dad! Toji deserves the world’s weight in love times a trillion idc
Draw toji in a sulley costume and my life is yours
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visualbutterflysworld · 1 year ago
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Drunk Vinnie | Vhackerr
Warning: vinnie being drunk and clingy
might make a part 2. idk
“I need to text my girl. I want my girl.” Vinnie whined as he leaned onto Jack. “She’s right there Vin.” Jack laughed as he pointed to you, who was preoccupied by ordering a Uber. “That’s….that’s not her! I’m texting Y/n right now.” Vinnie huffed before pulling out his phone. He pulled in his bottom lip. He squinted his eyes trying to successfully type correctly.
In his mind he thought he texted, baby where are you? I miss you!
Instead he actually texted, “biby here ure uuuu( iiiii muss youuu &&”
You chuckled as you read the text before going back to what you were doing. “Why won’t she text me back!? DID SHE DIE?! JACK CALL THE COPS!” Vinnie yelled when he did see those three bubbles pop up. “Vinnie, stop yelling.” You rubbed his arm, trying to sooth him. “No! Who are even you?! I have a girlfriend, lady!” Vinnie quickly gave you a dirty look.
“I am your girlfriend, Vinnie.” You laughed. “No! You don’t look like my Y/n. My pretty Y/n. Where’s my pretty Y/n?” Vinnie’s bottom lip begins to tremble. “Okay, Vinnie, let’s get you home.” You say, “Jack. Help? Uber’s here.” Jack nods before you and him put Vinnie’s arm over your shoulders.
“Y/n! I love Y/n so much! She’s so pretty!” Vinnie yells as you guys walk outside. “Vinnie, shhh.” Jack said. “Jack-o’-lantern, you just don’t understand.” Vinnie lays his head on Jack’s shoulder. “Yeah, man. Here. In you go.” Jack shakes his head before helping you put vinnie in the car.
After a short 15 minute drive you guys are back at your house, knowing Vinnie will be too loud for his apartment. “Honey! I’m home!” Vinnie yells as he stumbles into the house. You shake your head before shutting the door and locking it. “Do you want some water?” You ask. “Yeah, that sounds great random person. Hey, this place looks at lot like my girlfriend’s house?” Vinnie scans the room.
You quickly dash and get him some water. Once he’s handed the glass, the water is gone in a matter of seconds. “Let’s get you to bed.” You say before grabbing his hand. “Okay, but nothing is happening between us! No funny business lady or I’ll tell Y/n!” Vinnie tells you. It was honestly so cute, seeing Vin miss you even though you were there.
Once you reach the bedroom, Vinnie wastes no time collapsing on the bed. “Mm. So comfy.” A happy lazy smile on his face. You take his shoes off and his socks knowing he hates sleeping with his socks on. “Y/n is the best. Do you have a Y/n?” Vinnie asked as you unbuckled his belt. “Sorta. Expect he’s a guy.” You say before pulling his pants down and throwing them somewhere. “That’s good. What’s his name?” Vinnie ask as you pull him to sit up. “Arms up.” You say.
Vinnie puts him arms up and strikes a pose while doing so. You laugh softly before pulling it off as well. Sober vinnie would thank you because he gets hot to easily in his sleep. “The guy! His name!” Vinnie says before falling back. You don’t know how but he somehow knew he wasn’t under the covers so he quickly places himself underneath.
“Vinnie. His name is Vinnie.” You say before grabbing a t shirt to sleep in. “What!? That’s my name! My name is Vinnie!” Vinnie yells. “I know that, Vin.” You quickly toss your hair in a low bun before sliding in bed. “I never asked but, what’s your name?” Vinnie says. “It’s y/n.” You laugh before moving a piece of hair out his face. Vinnie’s face scrunched before his eyes went wide.
“Wait a minute! You’re Y/n! My Y/n! Oh my God! When did you get here baby?!” Vinnie quickly rushes into your arms. You laugh, “I’ve been here the whole time Vin.” “Nuh uh! That other lady was here! I swear.” Vinnie nuzzles his head in your neck. You lay back so that you can both rest comfortably. “Whatever you say, Vin.” You message his head.
“I love you Y/n. Promise to never leave me like that again?” You smile before slowly closing your eyes. “I love you too. I promise to never leave you again.” You feel Vinnie smile and it isn’t long before the both of you are passed out into a bliss.
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donutz · 5 months ago
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sebastian with a reader who gives him a ton of resources and asks if they can buy a kiss from him O-O
Buying a kiss from Sebastian
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You aren't that delusional right?
— A big ol smooch. Mwah. Delicious fishy skin oh so yummy.
Warning: Shy reader, but not the stereotypical 'Y/N'; Stutters, I'm sorry I'll try to make it realistic; THIS IS NOT A BIG DADDY AND SHY Y/N TROPE.; Sorry I just wanted to warn you; I don't use Y/N anyways, I use Reader as if there's a difference😎; There's no kiss on the lips☹️; Buttt there's a teasing Sebastian; 'Bad' words; Non-human reader, they just have the ear fins; They have green-like skin with four yellow eyes! Two fakes ones underneath their original ones; They also can disguise as a human
After dying over and over again, you became acquainted with Sebastian. You saw him in the shop and even saw him when you were dead. You’re not sure on how the dying thing works but…
It doesn’t really matter as long as you get to see Sebastian.
You’ve gained feelings for him, even though he isn’t very.. Human. His little insults can be annoying but I guess it’s um. Reasonable? Yeah that’s something you don’t enjoy all that much.
But his voice and his tone is something that you like. You may have a strange taste but who doesn’t like a 10 ft tall man that has aquatic features?
… Probably every other normal person…
But some mermen can be attractive! You feel like a little kid crushing on cartoons.
Sebastian seems very closed off and distant from humans. Maybe because humans are the reason he’s this way?
That’s understandable.
I don’t think I would like humans at all if I looked like that either. It’s not like he’s ugly it’s just… It seems like he was human before being that way.
Anyways
Maybe since he doesn’t seem okay with other forms of affection— You could get him a gift! It’s unexpected, can be taken as platonic, and a way to get closer to somebody! Perfect!
Though what should you get him?
Hmm…
You don’t know any of his likes, favorites, nothing really.
Oh!
But he has a shop!
You could uhh. Give him some items for his shop!
And then…
Ask for a kiss!
… Is that too forward? Well he might like you back!
He might… Like you back..
He doesn’t really give many hints on his feelings towards love. Especially towards you, minus the lessened amounts of insults he throws at you.
Oh that could be a hint! He stutters sometimes too! But he did that before he truly knew you… 
Ugh, too many ellipses.
Oh sorry I didn’t mean to break the 4th wall.
Agh hem.
As the loop starts again, you decided that the gift could be items. Items to give so he can hold it for his shop. Then a smooch!
A smooch?
Yeah a kiss. Totally. He’ll definitely give you a kiss with those… Rubber… Lips…
Okay maybe a kiss on the hand can suffice.
Exiting the submarine you prepare to give Sebastian a ton of items in return for a kiss!
Are you really that delusional?
.
.
.
Yes!
You end up finding flash beacons, flashlights, medkits— Actually maybe you should keep that one.
Y’know, just incase a good pers—
… Mmm…
People?
Just in case good people pops up.
Hate that thing.
Oh wow a lantern.
When it comes to the monsters and just being in this place in general, it’s like your whole personality switches. 
When it comes to Sebastian you’ll be all shy. But when it comes to just Urbanshade, its creatures, and Hadal Blacksite… You’re more mad and irritated.
Sometimes you even say bad words at the creatures.
Oooo.
Saying bad words even though you’re a grown adult.
How, “NO YOU CAN’T SAY THAT”!!
Y’know? 
When people infantilize shy characters?
Y’know?
☹️
You get pretty close to door fifty, having many helpful sources to give to that— man…
You hear an expected voice..(Oh how spooky)
“Hey. Come here”.
You look at an invisible camera pulling off that— Roblox man face or something- I don’t– I don’t know.
Speed walking over there in excitement, you hold a smile on your face. Your beautiful smile lines showing.
Damn, you really like him huh?
You crawl through the vents waiting with anticipation. Possible praise? Or even a smile?
You can’t wait.
Reaching the end of the vent, you immediately look up, bumping your head. It’s a good thing you have that head gear. You might’ve gotten a traumatic brain injury and five dollars.
… What.
A- Anways, you rub your head looking down.
“Oh damn. Well based on that head bump I already know who it is. Hello my favorite prisoner”.
“Hey Sebastian, yeah you’re so funny. Making fun of my h- head bump. Die”.
“Hey buddy I was justt messing arounddd”.
“M-hm- Mhm.” You let out pained noises. Getting out from the vent, you stretch out your limbs. Hearing a few pops
“Eww… Yuck, I hate those sounds.” Sebastian commented.
“Yeah they’re kinda weird about humans”.
“They suree areee”…
After a few seconds of silence, Sebastian speaks up.
“Soo, you gonna buy anything”?
“W- Well maybe, I– shiver, I actually have some gi- gifts for you.” Clearing your throat you physically cringe at the stuttering. It makes you seem.. I don’t know.. Fanfic material or something.
“Gifts”?
“Yea! Gifts.. T- To show you my um… G- Gratitude for- sigh, for giving me those items”.
He chuckled, “It’s not like I give you them for free or anything”.
“Yeah but sometimes you give me discounts”.
“Oh yeah huh”?
“So I— I wanted to give these to you, S- Sebastian”..
“You’re very stuttery today aren’t you”?
You look up at him while getting the things out of your bag.
You let out a shivery laugh, “Y- Yeah, I’ve never really um.. Given someone gifts before a- and it’s.. Spooky– down here”.
Sebastian could tell that was an excuse.
I know that was an excuse, it’s obvious you’re this way because of your little crush or something.
You hand Sebastian the items, his two claws engulfing yours. You wish these stupidly thick gloves were off your hands so you could actually feel his claws.
“And shaky”.
“Oh! Um”..
“You sure you’re okay?” He asks with concern. Putting away the items, he’s not sure why he even asked.
“Yeah I’m okay! It’s just um. Th- Those aren’t f- free.” Even with the small amount of built confidence, you were still very nervous.
“Oh of course they’re not. What is it? Do I have to give you some data or something? If you’re asking for cash then–”
“N- No”!
He’s surprised by the sudden and yippy-like voice.
“I uh, I don’t want data or cash”.
“... So, what do you want”?
“A. A uhm. Uh”.
“C’mon spit it out already”!
“A kiss!! Yeah a small kiss or something”..
.
.
.
Oh yes I love awkward moments, what about you?
“A kiss?” Sebastian repeats.
You nod, not even being able to speak right now. You’re looking at the ground with hands together and thumbs rubbing against the hard leather. If you weren’t sweating you definitely would be now.
“Y’know it would’ve made more sense if you said that before giving me the items”?
“Sebastian I’m serious”!
“Okay okay, yes you can have your kiss”.
You look up quickly, a quiet crack in your neck from turning it so fast.
You may think that you’re blushy and flustered one right now. Well that’s correct, if you can even blush.
Buttt you’re not the only one with a rapidly beating heart.
Sebastian’s trying to hide it, to not seem all vulnerable in front of somebody. Not just a human. Showing that you’re vulnerable is a sign of, I guess.. Weakness.
“But how can you even kiss me with that diving helmet”?
Oh yeah you forgot about that.
“O- Oh, yeah uhm- let me take care of that”.
That sentence peaks his interest, if you were to take that off then he’s sure your head would pop.
“W- Wait I was just joking—!” He reaches out to you to stop you, putting his right claw over your head gear.
Even though you’d be just fine with the pressure, you were shocked he even stopped you.
“Oh uhm. Sebastian. I’m not fully human, I can handle the pressure with or without the gear”.
Whattt??
His face scrunches with confusion and shock, stunned. 
You take off the head gear, but don’t worry, you’ve managed to disable that explosion thing. Just temporarily, they haven’t noticed yet.
You hold your gear in your hand, looking up at Sebastian.
You smile, showing off your yellowish, blueish teeth. Your ear fins sway slightly, up and down.
“Yeah I’m not really uhh, human. Fully anyways.” You set your gear on the ground—
“A- And I’ve taken care of that blowing up device. S- So don’t worry”.
God he reallyyy hopes that nobody walks in right now.
“Th- They can’t hear me either so, I’ll be fine temporarily. I’ll soon have to turn it all back on so they don’t suspect anything”.
Wow.
He thought you were kinda dumb to add onto your shy personality.
Damn.
That’s um.
Surprising.
You can feel his stare on you. It’s not very uhh, it’s not a good feeling.
You look back up at him, putting a hand over your forehead as if it were a visor.
“Do I not look good or-”
“N- No! That’s not why I’m staring. It’s just.. Surprising. I couldn’t really get any hints on how you weren’t a human”.
“Ah, well that was on purpose actually. I- I’m not sure if you really do scents but– I gave myself a more human scent and covered up the dark green skin with a more human one”.
Woww, yes you’re sooo smart.
He keeps on staring at you.
“Anyways, what about that uhm.. That kiss..?” You mentally cheer at the least amount of stutters in the much bolder question.
“O- Oh yes”!
Oo! A stutter!
“Well I doubt you would kiss me on the lips”.
“O- Oh I don’t m- mind— Ughh, I don’t mind kissing you anywhere really. Just a kiss itself is fine”!
“Oh really?” He teased.
“Y- Yes.” You whisper.
“Well, how about a kiss to the palm, yeah? Not too forward and nearly just the right amount of romance”.
“Yeah that’s fine”!!
Your somewhat wobbly legs move over to Sebastian. He slightly moves his right claw to your face, casting a shadow over your head because of how big it is.
You grab both sides of his hand and lean over to his palm, giving it a quick—
Smooch!
To the palm. Even after the kiss you still stay there for a few seconds, before backing away with your hands behind your back.
You hurriedly put your head gear back on before quickly stuttering out—
“T- Thank you f- for the k- kiss! I enjoy- gulp, enjoyed it”!
Rushing out of the shop, you let out a huge breath.
As if this was some show, the camera would pan to Sebastian’s scrunched up face, his lip(?) quivering. He’s happy that he’s cold blooded, or else he’d be blushing very, very hard right now.
He holds up that same palm, and puts it to his lips(??).
Letting out a shaky breath.
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Guys guess how much words..
1773!!! I'm so good at um. Long fanfics yeah😛😛
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qcomicsy · 2 years ago
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a list of funniest things jason todd could do:
slowly steal the parts of the batmobile and reassemble it elsewhere, then pull up next to bruce in his own second secret batmobile
become a lawyer and get joker setenced to the death penalty - bonus is that he completes college and gets a degree which bruce never did and alfred is proud beyond the gravethat one of his grandkids actually completed college
change bruces name to "free trires" in his phone contacts
call time the wrong name everyday, but it starts of sounding like a genuine mistake (tom, jim ect) and slowly gets further and further away from the original (jimothy, jeremy, dave, the dogs name)
dye his hair red, claim he was an original red head and then gaslight the family into believing bruce made him dye his hair black to look more like dick and be a replacement
come out as gay and claim to be the only gay member of the batfamily and when tim tries to say something to dispute it he just hits him with "who are you again? the computer guy or smthing?"
could also come out as poly and roll up to family dinners with more than one partner and if someone says something about it, he just says "mad cuz i got TWO more partners than you huh. lonesome bitch."
feel free to add on
LMAAAAOO THIS IS GREAT
Let's go.
Made a carbon copy of Batman and spread in strategic places on the Batcave, Tim's boat, Clock Tower, Duke's nest and Dick's house. (He almost killed them)
(One of Dick's colleagues saw it and he had to lie he was this die hard Batfanboy, his ego never recovered until today.)
Stole Tim's mug and placed on Damian's room, stole Damian's mug and placed on Tim's boat then proceeded to visit the Manor until he hard the scream of the fight he planted between them;
When he saw Bernard for the first time he said "Whoa Timmy you move on fast, this one is Terry right?";
Did a Tramp Stamp tattoo;
Slut shames Dick every chance he gets (this one is actually cannon);
Shot Dick's phone;
Every Christmas shows up with a different Outlaws member and affirms that's his partner
Dated an arrow to piss of his dad, when Bruce got over it proceeded to date a lantern instead;
Never told no one other than Dick he's actually in a stable relationship with Artemis because he refuses to swap Bruce's horrified reaction to a normal one;
Gave Bernard the shovel talk;
When he bumped with Selina after the (failed) marriage and she teased him on how he didn't gave her shit for it he just answered "No, no I get it"
Purposely brings Harley to bat reunions under the bullshit "She's my therapist" when the bats bother him, knowing his therapy with Harley only count when they're at her office;
Told every one he's Harley's adopted kid (actually Harley was the one to say that once when she was drunk and he just went along with it);
Exchanged Bernard's number to Kon's in Tim's cell phone and vice-versa;
Left his Mustache grow and showed up as Matches Malone in one of Wayne's Gala;
Lied he was actually a Titan but they kicked him out because Dick's is an asshole;
Stoled Signal's Patrol Lunch;
Stole's Spoiler's lunch;
Brought alcohol to manage going through their family gathering when he was caught he blamed on Tim;
(He thought about blaming on Dick but he knew Dick would just go along with it)
Everytime Dick, Barbara and Bruce call him he answers with "He's dead";
Introduced Tim to the Outlaws with "That's Robin they found him on the thrash"
Showed up to Barbara's job dropped a "Hi mom" as a greeting then proceeded to laugh his ass off while Barbara tried o explain to her coworkers that that tank of a man wasn't her child;
Told Dick Talia adopted him;
Told Talia Dick adopted him;
Told Damian that if Batman dies he's going to adopt him out of spite;
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mygnolia · 3 months ago
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TASTE OF LIFE. l. heeseung
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THE TALE GOES...heeseung is invisible to everyone, robbed of recognition as people pass through and never acknowledge him. to live as a shadow who observes is hard—heeseung sinks into corners and simply wishes for a chance to be a part of something. but when you finally come to the biggest halloween party of the year and see him, he can’t help but be attached. 
pair -› lee heeseung x fem!reader | trope -› horror, literally no fluff | warn -› major character death, violence, stalking | REN SAYS.. first installment! also this is shit guys im so sorry I NEEDED TO GET THIS OUT ASAP ugh writing this much lowk killed me </3 | 3k words | library
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Mediocre. Normal. Ordinary.
That’s exactly how you’d describe the house that stood before you, with your bags tightly held in both hands as you ascended the few stairs to the porch. It felt like any other house, and you’d even compare it to the old one you were in. 
The previous home was different in one major way—it added years of aging onto your parents somehow, as if something had sucked the life out of their minds. It drove them crazy to stay home, and you couldn’t help but be embarrassed every time they mumbled in public about going home. 
They looked crazy. You just had to droop your head and pretend you didn’t know them. 
Your parents’ eyes lit up when they entered through the door, with wood flooring and a color scheme that reflected on their preferences. It was almost identical to your other house, so why exactly did they choose to move to a home that was no different than the last? If anything, you were just glad they were starting to feel more comfortable within the new space. It felt breathable, and something about the old place you lived in felt dirty and plagued. 
It wasn’t much of a struggle as you began to unpack the bags of clothes and boxes of items you brought with you, considering how little you cared about accents and decorations. With furniture already there, your room felt akin to your other one, but something was off. You tried to move the desk over to the window to gauge the effectiveness of the natural lighting, and when your curtains gave way to slightly clouded rays of sunlight in your room, you hummed with some satisfaction. Good enough. 
As Halloween came around, you understood how much everyone in the local town loved to celebrate. Houses on your way to school were filled with webs, lights, and jack-o-lanterns, and it made you believe that the pumpkin farm on the outskirts of town had a smart business model. On top of having an abundance of fall flavored desserts, the Yang family held the biggest party of the year, seeing as their son went to the same high school of yours. 
You had only heard whispers of the annual Yang Halloween party, rumored to be the best party of all time, was something you were looking forward to every year, even anticipating the post-celebration news to hit you from the town over. 
The day neared, and you got more and more excited to finally get to know people ever since you arrived in town. People knew of you as the new girl, but no one reached out, all too consumed in their own cliques to introduce themselves to you. 
“Taste,” you told the man waiting outside. “The password is ‘taste.’ “
The windows were tinted in red as moonlight streamed through one side of the building. The rest of the house was dark, with only flashing orange, purple, and green lights strung carefully to add to the mysterious ambience. Music blasted from the speakers and shelves were lined with decorations, ones that you were careful to avoid knocking over as you slid your way between crowds. There seemed to be never ending snacks, as people with tattered black cloaks always managed to keep the drinks filled and the rows neat. 
It was obvious that the family knew what they were doing when it came to throwing parties—you hadn’t seen one person without a smile on their face. The festivities like horror rooms and games were all through-out the floor, and there was always something for everyone to do. 
You fell into conversation with a few people, cutting it short as you excused yourself to the restroom. Down the same hall was a door that was left ajar, and you went to shut it before returning to the boy who you just met. 
“Hi.” 
You jumped back, eyes darting around as you searched for someone to match the sudden voice, and you heard a small curse in the same direction. Your feet were frozen as you only looked around, your hand still on the knob of the empty restroom as you hoped someone would come to break you out of your stupor.
There was nothing, you promised yourself, and the door shut with a click. Still, your gut swirled with fear as you slowly turned, anxiously rubbing the goosebumps on your skin.
“You can hear me, huh?” 
You knew the sound was coming to your left, where the flashing lights were nowhere to be found. All you had was the phone you fished out of your back pocket before you saw a flash of something pale. You immediately turned, trying to find it once more. 
You could’ve sworn there was something. 
“Hello?” You probably looked insane to any bystander, calling out to the dark when you swore you saw something nearby. 
To both your surprise and horror, someone floats through the closet door, his limbs passing through as a grin makes his way onto his features. 
You’d think the ghost in front of you was attractive, if it wasn’t for the fact that you were experiencing something supernatural for the first time. 
Bile rose in your throat as you became disoriented looking at the figure. With a yelp that caught confused stares from only a few people nearby, you scurried out of the house, bumping into bodies as the door grew closer and closer. 
Like a bubble about to burst, the house feels stuffy and humid until you open the large doors, swallowing the cold air of the night like a lifeline. Your head spins with confusion, and you can’t seem to understand what you just saw until he seeps through the wall once more. 
“I’m sorry if I scared you.” You yelp at the sound of his voice, taking a few steps back as you look anywhere but his sullen face. 
The sound of your heart won triumph over anything else as you kept trying to make space between you and the creature in front of you. When he begins to glide closer, you take it as your sign to grab your small clutch and begin a brisk walk back home, no matter how dark.
“My name is Heeseung. No one’s ever seen me,” he explains, easily drifting behind you. 
“Get the fuck away from me, Heeseung.” Your voice sounded shaky as the wind rushes past your ears. You felt hopeless, unable to hear his footsteps or gauge where he could be. 
He’s right next to you, speaking directly to your profile all of a sudden. “Please, no one’s recognized me since I died. Please, you have to help me.”
The change in proximity has you jumping from being frightened, and you try to cover your ears to block out his voice. 
The worst part of it all was that Heeseung could touch you. You felt the cold of his fingertips without the pressure of his mortality in his fingertips. Effortlessly drifting next to you, he worked to pry your fingers from your ears as a plea for you to hear him out.
“I don’t care. Leave me alone.” You began speeding up, seeing your house in sight and the ghost beginning to fall back in his misery. You didn’t care about it, only wanting to go home and pretend everything was a bad dream. While the ghost wasn’t ugly by any means, the supernatural facet of his identity kept you up as you feared the creature outside your window at any moment. 
What you didn’t know was that your gut feeling was right���Heeseung wouldn’t stop until he got what he wanted. 
You didn’t know what was louder–Heeseung’s voice in your ear, or the thudding of your heartbeat. 
Your scream echoed around the empty house when he appeared for the second time, your heart dropping as the lack of sleep you got from the night before made you even more on edge now. Everytime you looked down a corridor, shivers racked your body and you were unable to go anywhere without a flashlight. You swore you saw him in the corner of the room, and if not–something was horribly wrong with you. 
There he was again, staying by the edge. “Please, get away from me, I can’t give you what you want, Heeseung.” You tried to keep your voice as steady as possible, as if you weren’t shaking from fear that you’d be joined by an intruder everytime you turned the corner.
You couldn’t shower or change without wanting to tear your hair out, and there was no way to quell the anxiety after you saw him stick an arm through your home. 
There was nothing you could do. No one who you could go to about this. You were truly all alone. 
Class felt like a blur with an ache in your head and an emptiness in your stomach. It was exhausting for you to dart around the room, waiting for him to appear. 
He was waiting for something, you knew it. 
You felt on edge constantly, like you were going insane. Every small movement triggered some sort of reaction, so much so that your classmates began to notice and snicker. 
You felt like your parents–and you had no idea how to make it stop. 
It was the third day of your sleepless torment. Your parents often left you alone according to their new work schedules, and you were still stuck having to hide from the apparition until you left for school. He looked torn apart, too, but you couldn’t understand why he couldn’t give you space. It got so bad to the point where you heard whispers of him in every corridor. You couldn’t stand it anymore, and your bloodshot eyes and scratched arms were a sign that something had been wrong ever since Halloween. 
There was only one person you could tell about this, and you didn’t even notice how bad your fingers had been when you went to pick at the dry skin once more. 
“Jungwon,” you mumbled as you passed him. He turned around, immediately recognizing you as someone he didn’t know much about. 
“Is everything okay?” He asked, concern knitting his eyebrows as you asked for him to talk with you outside. 
Something was off that day. The clouds were gray, dipped with unease. The sky was bathed in dread, and Jungwon could tell something was wrong by the way you couldn’t find the sun no matter where you looked. 
“What’s wrong, ____? You’ve been looking horrible ever since Halloween.” You flinched at the word, eyes stinging with tears as you were pushed back into thinking about that night. You never should’ve worn your black dress or added some cute cat ears. You never should’ve left the house. 
“There’s something in your house, Jungwon,” you pleaded, your gaze frantically searching for any sign that Heeseung followed you. “It’s like a spirit, something happened and it won’t—“ your words came to an abrupt halt when you heard a chuckle from the boy in front of you. 
A laugh tore through as Jungwon crossed his arms and looked at you with a pitiful grin. “You’re funny. Good prank, though,” he smiles, about to turn. 
You had no idea what came over you when you went to grab his arm. Jungwon was practically a stranger to you, but one more sleepless night without a cure would’ve made you go insane if he kept following you. You needed to get rid of Heeseung. 
“No!” Your voice rang out louder than anticipated, and the sudden shout made you wince, still holding onto Jungwon’s arm. “You don’t get it, something’s following me around, he keeps talking to me and no one else can see him—“ 
The boy yanked himself out of your grip, suddenly frustrated, and you feared the worst; Yang Jungwon would tell the whole school that you were crazy. 
“Please, Jungwon—” you tried once more, “he’s real—he’s everywhere and I can’t get rid of him—it was because of your party,” at this point, your eyes were filled with tears as you begged your only hope from leaving. “You have to help me—“ 
“I don’t have to do anything for you, ____.” He sneered, growing impatient. “I don’t know who put you up to this whole prank, but you need to stay away from me.” He spun around, paying you no attention as you crumbled to a heap on the ground and sobbed hopelessly on the pavement. 
The sky was darker than ever, and it was still afternoon.
Even as you walked down the empty dirt roads to your house, you couldn’t help but hear Heeseung’s voice ring in your ears. As you started running to push the sound out and replace it with your heavy breathing, your eyes began to shut with exhaustion. Slowing to an eventual stop in front of your house, you heaved, gasping for air that felt like it was escaping your lungs any moment as you held into the porch railing
“You’re home. What took you so long?” 
Your vision was blurring slightly in the corners, and the corners of your eyes felt puffy. You were slipping out of consciousness, but you remembered that voice anywhere. “Get away from me, please.” 
Heeseung pursed his lips, feeling slightly bad for the state that you were in. “I told you, I can help you.”
When you saw his pale shoes in front of you, your body reacted instantly, scrambling back to create some distance. You hadn’t registered that a wooden splinter from the floor cut into your palm until Heeseung saw the blood seep into the planks underneath you. The porch made no sound under his quick footsteps, and it only instilled more frustration at his lack of perceptibility. His sudden approach left you frightened as you waved a hand in the air, unable to feel the wound from the state of your body. “Go away, Heeseung!” 
He frowned angrily. “Let me help.” He kneeled next to you and reached out for your wound before you yanked your hand back, stumbling as you got back up and tried to make your way to the entrance.
“Please, stop,” you cried, taking two steps towards the railing before your legs gave out. Heeseung tried to reach out for you again. But you pushed away his hand, the slap of the force making no sound. It was almost humorous how much your torture was one sided, but you had no more energy left to defend yourself.
Heeseung went to grab your wrist, worry etched in his features as your state deteriorated in front of him. You kicked his leg, hot tears staging your cheeks as you sobbed for him to leave you alone, but the more carelessly you moved, the more the large splinter dug into your hand. He begged for you to stop–to let him help you before anything bad happened, but you couldn’t understand through the sound of your own hysterics. 
A mix of going days without sleeping, paired with your lack of appetite and delirium left you defenseless no matter how much you tried. You struggled against the ghost of Heeseung’s grip as he tried to stop you from hurting yourself even further. You felt bile in your throat when he was close, and you found the opportunity to yank your arm out of his grip. You underestimated the force, however, and your hand hit the wood behind you. Momentarily distracted, you focused on the blooming pain of the impact and the slowly trailing blood. It was out of body how you couldn’t process the sensation of your fingers tracing the messy wound, and you became a slave to your exhaustion as the boy came back.
You fought against him weakly, the blood from your wound becoming a larger problem the more you used your hands to do anything. 
“You don’t get it!” He yelled, tears of his own forming from the anger of having to go against you. 
Why couldn’t you just stop? Why did you keep pushing him away? You were selfish, trying to ignore him as if you didn’t understand his predicament. You were the only one who could’ve seen him, and he was the only one who saw you in return. “Even Jungwon doesn’t believe you,” he mumbled bitterly, seeing you slowly slip in and out. “You wouldn’t even help me, ____. It’s all your fault.” He talked as if you could hear him, the life in your eyes gone by the time he wiped his tears and finally looked at you, with your wrist going limp in his hold. 
“I don’t get it.” He wept angrily, before getting up and leaving you there on the porch steps in a heap. 
Heeseung turned to glance at you again, his semblance of a heart in pain from how things had to end up. “You seemed so nice–so promising. Jungwon swore we could've been friends.”
You didn’t know if it was possible to kill a ghost twice. After all, your death turned you into a floating apparition of yourself, as you watched your parents mourn their attempts to shield you from their own fate. Being a ghost wasn’t so horrible, but Heeseung was right; it was lonely. 
When a voice calls your name apologetically from where you sit on your rooftop, your gaze settles on him with fury, and the moment you rush over to him and your fingers close around his wrist, you knew that you wouldn’t stop until you properly got rid of Lee Heeseung.
No matter how long it took.
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i swear the rest of them will be better. and shorter.
zyvlxqht firstclassjaylee @riribelle @jaylajakey @minfolio @strxwbloody @r1kification @strayy-kidz @mimismenu @jwonistic @haechsworld @machambrx @ririsreverie @hollxe1 @wonnina @heeseungismymanz @cyjhhyj @eunimaybe
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lovelytsunoda · 2 months ago
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beautiful girl (stay with me) | jake 'hangman' seresin
summary: the three lit jack-o-lanterns in their bay window shouldn't have been the lightscape to their sweetest, purest intimate moments, but hey, what happens on halloween stays on halloween.
pairing: jake 'hangman' seresin x girlfriend! reader
warnings: 18+ only, smut ahead! jake is a tender lover, fight god, not me, for he made the man and his mother raised him well!! sex on a couch. could be considered slightly exhibitonist but i dont really think so. two people in love wanting to make each other feel good.
author's note: i know this makes it two jake fics in one collection....but i saw this prompt and literally no drivers came to mind??? i feel real burned out with f1 right now and part of my rebrand is to establish myself as a writer for other fandoms that i enjoy, even though i know that f1 will always be my ride or die <3
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as the last of the nights trick-or-treaters (this group mostly rambunctious high school students trying to make the most out of their last eligible free candy year, she guessed) descended down the interlock driveway, past jake's pickup truck and around her petite volkswagen, she began to bring the pumpkins inside, setting them down in her bay window. jake had already drawn the drapes, and was all to ready to lock the door.
they were barely able to go ten minutes along in their movie before the doorbells rang to interrupt, and while it irked them both greatly, y/n was more than happy to hand out little bars of twix and mars and kitkat to the neigbourhood children.
"they're gone." she said softly, fighting a yawn as her eyes found the little digital clock next to the flat screen television. "they stayed out later this year. weren't we finished by ten last year?"
jake rose from the couch, wrapping his beefy, warm arms around his girlfriend and holding her close, swaying softly from side to side. "they're getting smarter. when i was that age, i knew that the later i came, the better my chances of getting to run off with the whole bowl of chocolate were."
"so what i'm hearing is that you never stopped being a menace?" she laughed, lightly scratching the back of his neck with the tips of her press on nails. they were designed to look like blood dripping down her fingernails, but it had been a fight to keep them on all night.
"oh, babe, i've always been a menace." jake grinned, leaning in to kiss her softly.
call him insane, but fall always turned jake seresin into a sappy man. something about the way that the leaves changed color and his girlfriend looked cute in scarves and plaid.
"you look radiant this evening."
she raised her eyebrows. "i'm wearing beetlejuice pajama pants and a crop top with no bra, there's a zit on my chin and i only brushed my hair once today."
grinning, jake kissed her forehead before cupping her face in one of his large hands. "you always look radiant to me, y/n."
"you're such a sap"
"only for you, darlin'."
he kissed her again, broad smiles on their faces as he took her bottom lips in his, hands trailing over the fluffy material of her pants in order to sturdily grip her thighs and lift her into the air. she laughed into the kiss as he spun them around, his arms tucked behind her thighs to keep her in midair as he strode towards the couch, gently placing her down among the mountain of halloween pillows that were strewn across the furniture. a pumpkin shaped pillow from ikea found it's way behind her head, providing skull support while she stared lovingly into jake's blue-green eyes.
"i love you." he breathed, resting his forehead against hers. "happy halloween, beautiful girl."
"i love you too, jake." she giggled, pulling him in for a kiss. "happy halloween, my love."
with every kiss, she felt herself sinking further into the plush couch, jake's body gently rubbing against hers. her legs falling open, allowing the pilot to settle between her thighs. his touch was warm and comforting, and the living room had become quite the sensual environment: the dim lighting allowed the three pumpkins that were still lit to glow brightly from their place next to the bay window, and the orange fairy lights rimming the tv stand blinked calmly in the distance. the end credits of 'halloween ends' played soothingly in the background, 'don't fear the reaper' filling the space.
he nuzzled her neck, the cold tip of his nose sending shivers along her skin.
"how did i get so lucky?" he murmured, softly kissing her pulse point, one arm curling under her back and around her waist. "you are my everything."
she keened into his touch, back arching as she let out a heady moan.
"keep it coming, pretty girl. you know i love to hear it when i make you feel good."
his hands slipped underneath the waistband of her pants, strong hands tracing the outline of her festive panties.
black with orange jack-o-lanterns, if you must know.
"jake." she giggled, squirming under his touch. "baby, your hands are so cold."
jake winked at her. "i think i can fix that." he slid off the couch, striding over to the armchair by the flat screen, grabbing the tv remote from the coffee table on his way, switching the channel from the movie they had just finished to a stingray station playing soft rock. he grabbed the plush blanket from the back of the chair, stripping out of his t-shirt and moving back to the couch, footsteps heavy with purpose.
kicking off his slippers, he returned to his rightful place between his lovers legs, now bare as she dropped her velveteen pants to the hardwood floor. he unfolded the blanket pulling it around their bodies and over their shoulders.
his bare chest was warm against her clothed one, her nipples popping up underneath the ribbed fabric and standing to attention.
"better?"
"much."
"good." he spoke softly, brushing her hair out of her face before bending to kiss her again. one hand skirted over and up her thigh before deftly pushing aside the seat of her panties.
his ministrations were gentle, toying with her entrance. she giggled, squirming at the sensation when he slipped his pointer finger inside.
"atta girl. don't get shy on me, baby. i wanna see you."
there was a faint blush on her cheeks, her arms coming up to loop around his neck. her breathing was heavy as his finger darted up towards her g-spot, eliciting a small moan from the woman underneath him.
"feelin' good, sugar?"
"very." she beamed, leaning up to kiss him, hips canting towards his knuckles.
he kissed her forehead, eyes scanning her face and committing every detail to memory: the faint blush, the sweat beginning to form on her hairline. that sexy part of her lips, the steady rise and fall of her chest.
jake seresin was in love, truly madly and deeply.
"are you ready for me, princess?"
"always" she hummed, fingers brushing through his hair. "make me feel good, lieutenant."
jake smirked. "i will never ever get tired of hearing you call me that. just so you know."
"good." she beamed, leaning up to kiss him. "because i'm never going to get tired of saying it."
still kissing her softly, jake reached under the blanket, under his plaid flannel pants, pushing them down messily until they were gathered around his ankles and driving him absolutely mad with the thought that he would have to stop showering his girlfriend with love and attention in order to properly take them off (so obviously, he just decided to let them keep annoying him), so he could withdraw his aching member.
her thighs were coated in her slick juices, spilt everywhere from how messily jake had been fingering her and covering the seat of her panties. they were sticky and slick at the same time as jake pulled them down her legs, offhandedly casting them over his shoulder, where they landed on the arm of the couch with a wet thump.
he only teased her a little bit, rubbing the head of his cock over her entrance a few times before sliding in gently. her body welcomed him, fitting around him like a glove. she gasped in pleasure, arms tightening to pull him closer as her legs slid up his body and over his torso, her slightly dry toes caressing his spine as she settled in against him.
he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, mentally counting to ten. "my god, darling. you feel fucking incredible around me. this right here, this is my happy place. just you and me, skin to skin."
she laughed softly, thumb caressing his cheek. he keened under her touch, nuzzling deeper into her hand.
god, he could be such a softie sometimes.
"need a minute, tough guy?"
"i always need a minute, babe. you just feel so good that if i don't collect myself, this won't last very long."
his thrusts were slow and gentle, but deep as he filled every part of her, taking his time to make sure she felt as good as possible. he pushed her legs higher up his body, adjusting the angle in a way that rewarded him with a moan of his name.
"jake, oh god." she moaned, tugging gently on his hair. "you feel so good, baby. making me feel incredible."
"that's my sweet girl." jake smiled, kissing her neck as his hands massaged her thighs, hips still moving slowly, but with force and purpose. he could feel sweat dripping down his blonde locks of hair, falling, falling, falling to his lover's shirt, soaking into the fabric.
the plush blanket would soon feel too warm, body temperatures rising as he rocked into her. her fingernails scratched at the skin on his neck, moans exchanged into heated kisses as her hips canted upwards, trying to meet his thrusts.
"atta girl. take what you need from me, darling. that's what i'm fucking here for. to make you feel so so good." jake growled, nipping at her bottom lip. "i fucking live for it."
neither of them were quite sure how much time they spent on the couch that halloween night, baptizing it in their love. somewhere along the line, they lost the blanket, and jake was finally able to kick his pants off all the way.
and once they were certain nobody was outside and could peer in, they shifted positions, jake's back against the couch with yn perched on top of his lap like some kind of angel, her head pulled back as she whined, little ah, ah, ah's that made him feel weak in the knees while she rode him slowly, his hands placed gently on her hips to guide her.
"fuck, jake." she moaned, fingers trailing down to play with her clit. "i think i'm gonna come."
jake sat up straighter, pulling her body closer to his, pressing his naked form against hers, holding her tightly as he started to grind against her, his movements meeting hers.
"atta girl. almost there, come on baby. i've got you. jake's got you." he coaxed and cooed, doing his best to get her there.
she gasped, burying her face in his neck as she felt the feeling start to overwhelm her, the band in her stomach snapping. she moaned his name, almost falling limp in his arms as his fingers took over her movements, easing her through it to the best of his ability, feeling her release wash over his thighs. he came with a small groan and a curse, gently thrusting his hips up and allowing himself to spill inside of her.
god, he could get high off this feeling. (and it had taken them a while to get there, conversations riddled with little anxieties before she had agreed to let jake hit it raw, something he vowed never to take for granted. because her trust and her comfort meant everything to him.)
they kissed softly, a silhouette in the moonlight and the soft pumpkin glow, his thumbs gently drawing shapes on her skin. "hey pretty girl, why don't we go have a quick soak in the tub, i'll spot clean the couch, and then we curl up in bed and cuddle for a bit?"
she beamed, curling up against him. he was still technically inside her, which was slightly awkward now that his dick had softened, but he still wouldn't trade this soft moment of intimacy and love for anything.
"sounds magical."
yeah, this was definitely jake's best halloween ever.
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dorabellingham · 2 months ago
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Halloween
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warning: there are scares, but i don't think anyone gets scared like that
characters: jude x reader
summary: when you decide to have a little more fun on the night of the 31st but you're really scared
request: yes
may contain spelling and translation errors!
On Halloween night, the streets of Birmingham were decorated with jack-o'-lanterns, fake cobwebs, and decorations that created a humorous atmosphere of terror. You had convinced Jude to go to a haunted house. It seemed like a fun idea, a way to relive the mild horror thrills of when you were kids. But as soon as you arrived in front of the dark, foggy building, you began to question your choices.
You held Jude's hand tightly, staring at the facade with wide eyes. The house seemed to be crumbling under the weight of years and neglect, but somehow that only made it scarier.
—Jude, are you sure you don't want to do something else? Like watch a scary movie at home?
Jude laughed, squeezing your hand affectionately.
—You said yourself you wanted to be scared, right? Are you scared?
You lifted your chin, trying to look confident.
—Scared? Me? I just want to make sure you can hold yourself together and not run away when something scary comes along.
He chuckled, wrapping his arm around your shoulders as they walked inside.
—I’ll be here, holding on to you. The question is… who’s going to run away first?
As soon as you entered, you felt the air grow thicker, stuffier, and a shiver ran through you. The place was very well decorated, full of visual effects, sounds of chains, sinister laughter, and here and there, actors dressed as ghosts, murderers, and horror figures lurked in the shadows. Each step seemed to echo in the darkness, making you jump at any movement that escaped the corner of your eye.
—See? Don’t worry.
Jude whispered, as if holding back laughter. But your hand was clasped around his so tightly that he could barely move it.
You walked through narrow hallways, where old dolls stared at the visitors with empty eyes. You were curled up tighter and tighter, hugging your boyfriend's arm, but trying to keep a straight face so as not to show panic. However, when a ghostly figure slid out of a wall with a shrill scream, you let out a scream and clung to Jude as if your life depended on it.
—Jude Victor!
You whispered, hiding your face in his chest.
He chuckled softly, holding you closer and lightly stroking your back to reassure you.
—I told you I'd be here, didn't I? They're just trying to scare you... but no one will come near you, I promise.
You lifted your face enough to look at him with an expression divided between fear and distrust.
—Babe, I'm not kidding. I think there are people behind us. They're following us!
He tried hard to contain his laughter, but it was clear that the situation was very funny to him.
—It's just a trick, sweethear. Look. —He said, gesturing to the actor who had crept further back, a man dressed as a zombie with expressionless eyes. —They're pretending, just so we can have a different night.
But you didn't calm down. With each step, the place seemed more claustrophobic, more sinister. The walls were decorated with terrifying images and, in the distance, the sounds of chains dragging seemed to come from a hidden room. At a certain point, a hooded figure appeared next to you, extending a skeletal hand, and you let out another muffled scream, clinging even tighter to Jude's arm.
—Okay, I can see you're taking it seriously. —He said, trying to hide how cute he found the way you clung to him. —Do you think you want to get out of here, or do you want to go all the way?
You looked at him, and your pride prevented you from asking to leave.
—No... I can.
But with each new hallway, each new sinister figure, you shrank back more, tightening your arms around him.
You reached a room full of distorted mirrors, and as you passed through the center, a figure appeared out of nowhere in the reflection, as if it were directly behind them. You let out a small scream and buried your face in Bellingham's shoulder, unable to face the situation.
—Babe. —He said, his voice cracking with laughter. —This is just a game.
He wrapped his arms around you, protecting you as if he were the only real thing there.
You finally looked up, feeling his reassuring touch on your back.
—You think this is funny, huh? Just wait until you get scared too. I'll laugh a lot when it happens.
Jude looked at you with a challenging smile.
—Me? Get scared? Never.
When they finished the route, they passed through one last dark hallway, and you felt a small wave of relief.
—Finally, it’s over…
But just as they were almost at the exit, a hooded figure appeared with a fake knife, screaming. You grabbed Jude so hard that he almost lost his balance, but he kept his arm firmly around you, laughing softly.
—Fuck, Jude! What's this shit?
You, still shaking, lightly punched him in the chest.
—See? You survived.
—You laughed the whole time! I don’t know how you manage to be so calm!
He pulled you closer, kissing your forehead.
—Because I knew nothing would happen to you as long as you were with me.
Still recovering from the shock, you smiled, leaning into his embrace. As scary as the haunted house was, the feeling of safety next to Bellingham was something that no ghostly figure could shake.
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octuscle · 2 months ago
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Halloween Spirit
Mortimer didn't think much of video games and the like. Like social media, he blamed them for the dumbing down of the population and the success of populist parties. And if proof were needed, his cousin Dylan was proof. Dumb as a bag of
Since he couldn't find a hotel anymore, Mortimer had been forced to stay with Dylan during a conference. They hadn't talked much, Dylan was usually out with his “bros.” At the gym, at the sports bar, at the football game. Mortimer had used the evenings accordingly and cleaned the apartment, which was quite a mess. And when he came home in the evening, he was glad when a little of that cleanliness and order remained. Today he was lucky: the apartment was almost in the same condition as when he left it in the morning. There was only a PSP with a note on the dining room table. In Dylan's clumsy handwriting it said, “Bro, can you help me with the Halloween quiz? I always fail on the first I'll be back at eight, let's go for a steak then.” Mortimer was a vegan. Of course Dylan knew that. Mortimer sighed, took the PSP and sat down on the sofa.
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“What is the etymology of the name Halloween?“ Good heavens, thought Mortimer! Is this going to continue at this level? He typed in ‘All Hallows’ Eve.” “Who does the custom of carving and lighting jack-o'-lanterns commemorate (last name, first name)?” Did Dylan really not know that, Mortimer wondered and typed in “Jack Oldfield.” “Wrong” lit up on the display. “The correct answer would have been 'Oldfield, Jack'.” Out of the blue, Mortimer had to burp. Stupid software, he thought. A good AI would have recognized that he had only mixed up the order. He took a sip of cola from the can on the coffee table. ‘On which day do children in Germany traditionally go from door to door collecting sweets?’ Mortimer scratched his head. That was on St. Martin's Day. But when was that again? He typed in “November 11th.” Again, “Wrong! The correct message would have been November 10th.” Mortimer burped again. Hehehe, that was a good one. Came from the chili today. He took a slice of cold pizza out of the box next to him and moved on to the next question. “What is a zombie brain hemorrhage?” Mortimer had no idea. He just wrote “a TV series”. “Wrong, a zombie brain haemorrhage is a cocktail made of peach schnapps, mint liqueur, Bailey's Irish cream and a dash of grenadine.” Mortimer farted. Damn, the chili had been really good. But something else stank too. Mortimer raised his arm. No, that wasn't it. That was honest man sweat. Just the way a man had to smell. Mortimer pushed up his undershirt and scratched his stomach. This game was really boring. “What is the most popular Halloween costume of 2024?” Mortimer didn't feel like it anymore. He would put on his football gear like every year. With that, he could get any guy into bed. Especially the little nerds. They weren't so bad, usually made a real effort in bed… Shit, what was the question again? Okay, so “football player”. “Wrong, the correct answer would have been ‘Shrunken Head Bob’.” Was there another beer in this pigsty, Mortimer wondered. He looked at what other games Dylan had on the PSP. When was the idiot finally coming home? They were supposed to go out for a steak with the guys. Mortimer could definitely use some protein. He flexed his biceps. Yes, the babies needed feeding.
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“Bruh, im still stucc in traffic. Ill b home in about a quarter of an hr. Get ready fo' an epic dinner!” Mortimer knew what that meant. He wouldn't need his best buddy Dylan for the next hour. Enough time to play another round of Peace Walker. And then there was finally meat, almost raw, just how Morty liked it best. Hehehe, rare is also good for Halloween. His favorite holiday. But who could come up with such a stupid quiz with smart-aleck questions about it was a mystery to him.
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sunlightmurdock · 2 months ago
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Trick or Treat! | Firefighter Bradley
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spookweek masterlist | firefighter bradley masterlist
Prompt: handing out candy | joining firefighter!bradley at the station to hand out candy to the neighbourhood kids!
warnings: pet names babe / baby, no use of y/n. .word count: 0.7k
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Your heels clack along the walkway, past the clumsily carved, flickering Jack-o’-Lanterns. Ghosts with jagged edges and wide smiling faces with wonky eyes, all courtesy of the gang at Station 86.
Your lips twist, almost a smile, finding the precise attempt at a mustache’d face along the left row. Just then, you hear your name from across the lot. The classic red doors of Station 86 are pulled wide open, and Bradley is hustling his way towards you from the back.
“Baby, you made it!” His arms are loaded up with those giant bags of Halloween candy, the largest you can get. As his mouth stretches into a grin, you can see that there’s something different about his usual smile.
He drops the Halloween candy, still bagged up, onto the large fold-out table where two of his buddies sit and continues his path toward you.
“Are those fangs?” You wrinkle your nose, taking in the usual things you find most enjoyable — those fitted pants and the blue of his tight t-shirt against his tanned skin, the red of his suspenders straining against his thick shoulders — and the oversized plastic fangs in his mouth.
He beams, nodding his head as he reaches for you. “What, you don’t like them?”
Next comes the dive forwards, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist and securing you to him as he gnashes the stupid silicone fangs against your neck playfully.
Just as his wandering hand creeps towards your ass, he catches a glance at his next round of trick-or-treaters rushing along the sidewalk toward the station.
“Thanks for coming, babe. Here,” He presses a soft kiss to your cheek and ushers you towards the fold-out table, acknowledging his colleagues. “We’ve got it from here, guys.”
He had told you it would be fine if you had wanted to head home after work. His shift finishes at nine, and then he’s all yours for four days — starting tonight with a scary movie marathon. But, for now you’re happy to share him with the rest of the neighborhood.
Superheroes, ghosts and witches bounce along the walkway with grins on their faces, calling out your boyfriend’s name. With the class field trips to the station, and the station’s regular trips to the school, Bradley has plenty of pint-sized admirers.
Up in front of the mob are two first graders, sprinting ahead while their mothers chat behind.
“Not you two again!” Bradley mocks disgust, wrinkling his face in abject disapproval as two girls, one wrapped in toilet paper and the other wearing a bedsheet with eye holes in, rush him, plastic buckets for candy in hand. They giggle through their costumes as they come to a halt in front of him, looking up at the towering man. Their class had visited the day before yesterday, and the siren had frightened the two of them so bad that Bradley had broken out the Halloween candy a little early. “What do we have here? — A ghost and a…?”
“I’m a mummy!” She declares excitedly, waving her bucket at him.
“You’re a what?” He paints on his best look of fear and takes a dramatic step backwards, earning himself another round of giggles from the two girls. “What brings you all the way out here, little Mummy?”
“Candy!” Her friend answers for her, which they both find equally hilarious.
Bradley settles to his knees, keeping up the dramatics as more children crowd around him. He’s a natural, having them bursting into fits of laughter as he hands out chocolates and lollipops and other small bags of sugar-coated goodies.
You’ve been down to the station plenty of times, and been involved in plenty of events with them. This has always been more than a job to him, and you know he’s proud of what he does — you’re proud too.
But, even after all this time, there’s something about the fact that all of the neighborhood kids not only know his name, but clearly adore him so much, has you grinning as you help him pass out treats.
He catches you, draping a heavy arm around your shoulders during a rare break between herds of kids. Turning his face towards yours, he kisses the top of your head softly.
“Really, thanks for coming — I love having you here.” He murmurs, squeezing softly at your shoulder. “We’re about finished. You have a movie in mind for us to start with once we’re home?”
Just something scary, you think, already looking forward to the comfort of hiding your face in his chest and pretending that you can’t hear his heart beating just as fast as yours.
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eowynstwin · 3 months ago
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Blackbird, Fly - Three
Cowboy Gaz x mail order bride—only, not his. After exchanging letters for half a year with ranching man Hans König, you finally travel out west to marry him. - You wonder if this is how lambs feel, when shorn for the first time. - content warning for marital rape after the second break. - ao3
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“Come,” says Hans, tugging on your arm, “let’s get you ready for the ceremony.”
Your husband-to-be leads you up the porch steps and into the house, long legs carrying him ahead so fast you must practically jog to keep up with him. You stumble when you enter the house—the interior is fantastically well-appointed, with papered walls and carved wood furniture, framed photos hanging beside paintings, pressed flowers, hunting trophies, rifles and knives and old farm equipment. The floor beneath your feet is polished and smooth, spread over in places with thick, fringed rugs. You don’t see much more of it after your initial impression; Hans pulls you along at a clip.
Even such a brief glimpse, though, proves your long-held assumptions about Hans and his livelihood; his family has done well for itself, over the years. The kitchen, dining room, and sitting room are all separate from each other, and the manor’s first floor alone is larger than the small farmhouse you grew up in. Your family always made an effort to present a comfortable, clean home, but it seems downright drab in memory now in comparison to this.
There’s a bit of a bustle going on as Hans tugs you along—you hear movement in the kitchen, punctuated by the clang of dishes moving to and fro. A rough voice grinds out something short, and a couple of cowboys emerge with covered dishes that they set on the dining table before they return back into the fray. In the sitting room, an older woman with short, sandy brown hair sits at a desk, spectacles perched on the end of her nose. She glances up at you, betrays no interest, and then ignores you.
“You’ll meet everyone at the ceremony,” Hans says. He directs you up the stairs. “Right now you need something nice to wear.”
“O-oh,” you say, lifting the hem of your skirt as you climb the steps. The fabric, purchased at a discount after you’d saved pennies and nickels for months, suddenly feels thin and insubstantial between your fingers.
Hans brings you into the main bedroom, equally well-designed with molded wood paneling and brass lanterns on the walls, where he goes to a chest at the foot of the massive bed four-poster bed. Everything you’ve seen so far in this house is much finer than what even the most well-to-do farmers back home could display; you used to imagine that wealth like this could only be within the reach of select few businessmen on the east coast. You never imagined you’d have the chance to marry into it.
“I think this should suit you,” says Hans, turning to you with a stack of clothing in one hand.
You take it from him when he proffers it—a skirt, blouse, and jacket, you find. The fabric is silky in your hands, glossy and cool to the touch and very fine. You shake out the skirt; yards of bustled fabric tumble open to reveal pleated gathers, elegant bows, and velvet trim. The paired jacket is much the same, with pearl buttons down the front, and the accompanying blouse is a weave of tight, delicate lace.
Your earlier fears are soundly confirmed; you are in no way dressed for a wedding to Hans König. Gaz had only been trying to be kind; being here, now, seeing the kind of splendor Hans lived with every day, no one could make the mistake that you could measure up on your own.
“Thank you, Hans,” you say, face warming with embarrassment.
“Think nothing of it,” says Hans, looking you up and down expectantly. “Go on.”
You blink. “Ex—excuse me?”
Hans raises his brows as if it should be obvious. “Why, let’s see you in it, dear girl.”
You blanch. Surely he isn’t suggesting…“But—well, Hans, we aren’t—we haven’t—”
“My dear, I’ve already promised to marry you. Why would I go to such expense on a wedding merely to fool you into showing me your underthings?”
You drop your gaze to the floor, cheeks burning. “It’s not proper.”
“Bah,” says Hans. He takes the clothes back from you, tosses them onto the bed, and brings his hands to the buttons down your front. “It’s not like I won’t see this again in a few hours.”
You are rooted to the spot. He unbuttons your dress with an alacrity that startles you; in a few short moments, he makes an opening wide enough to slip over your shoulders, and unceremoniously he pushes the collar open and lets the dress drop to the floor.
You blink several times. You wonder if this is how lambs feel, when shorn for the first time; do they feel suddenly like they’ve been skinned? Does the air suddenly feel much closer, more real than it had before? You remember shearing season on a neighbor’s farm, the angular planes of shortened fleece cropped close to twitching flesh. The sheep had looked unfinished after the deed was done—like wooden figurines only partly whittled.
When you look to Hans’ face, you find him gazing at the tight space where your chemise tucks into the line of your corset. Then, as if in a dream, he reaches out with one huge hand and cups the mound of one breast.
The air vacates your lungs. It’s the first time a man has ever touched you this way.
When young ladies of a certain age gather to socialize, matters of discussion inevitably tend toward the prurient. Your peers delighted in sharing the wealth of erotic experience they’d accrued; trysts in larders, late graveyard meetings, dizzying accounts of hands and mouths in places that sent shame pumping hot and curious through your veins. You lived vicariously through their adventures; opportunities for your own, with three older brothers and a protective father, were nonexistent.
The embarrassing fact is that in matters of your marital duties, you received no practical education.
The one time your mother, a modest woman, saw fit to tutor you, she’d taken you out to the small enclosure in which the family goats were kept. The animals were useful for milk and occasionally meat, so there was always a breeding pair at hand. This occasion, they served the additional use of instruction; the male was rutting.
Your mother had made you watch as the billy mounted the nanny, and shoved its little goat prick into her hindquarters. The billy seemed mindless with want, ferocious, gyrating its hips uncomfortably, which the nanny took with what seemed like resigned patience, if it was paying attention at all. Once the billy finished, it dismounted, chewed its cud a little bit, and walked off. The nanny seemed unperturbed, rather detached from the whole thing, and similarly continued with whatever it had been doing before.
“It’s about like that,” said your mother, unable to look you in the eye.
So you have little knowledge of the matter.
And you have no idea what to do now, as your husband-to-be fondles you and stares down at you with what seems like only idle interest. Hans’ thumb brushes over the space where your nipple would be, hot even through layers of cotton and whalebone. The fine hairs on your arms raise, standing straight up.
What are you supposed to do now? Touch him back? Your stomach turns over at the thought. Even if you wanted to, you have no idea how. Hans is touching you so casually, as if you’ve been his wife for years, but you are as poor in wifely instinct as you are in everything else.
“Lovely,” he says, eyes locked on the place where your chest is rapidly rising and falling.
You inhale shakily. This is fine. He wouldn’t do this if it wasn’t—of course it’s all right, you’re to be married within the hour. It’s only your breast, and only his hand, and it’s over your clothes. It’s fine.
“May—” your voice comes out dry. You clear your throat. “May I dress now, Hans?”
He smiles. You note that he has a thin-lipped smile, and his eyes do not crinkle at the corners. “Of course.”
-
When the guests have all arrived, when the world around you is bathed in the orange-gold light of the setting sun, and when the mandolin plays the bridal chorus, you join Hans König under an archway of lupine and Indian paintbrush. Evening gives way to night as the last day of your old life comes to a close, ending as you say the words that until now you’ve only whispered in the night at your bedside.
For better—for worse—as long as you both shall live. Over and over again, until your tongue recognized the shape of them like the Lord’s Prayer. As if practicing them enough would speed the hour to you all the sooner in which their vow became real.
Hans kisses you for the second time, and then together, arm in arm, you turn to face the congregation’s applause.
Stars begin peeking white faces through the dimming sky as the band strikes up a tune, and as the reception commences, you must shake hands with the whole county. The priest John MacTavish insists upon introducing himself first—a younger man, with vivid blue eyes and an unusual haircut, gives his congratulations in a husky Scottish brogue entirely inappropriate for a man of the cloth. He’s followed by the sheriff, Simon Riley, who practically chases him off—another tall man, near to your husband’s height, and twice as broad. Curiously, he wears a bandanna across the lower half of his face. His greeting to you is gruff, short—polite in a way that seems unnatural for him.
Next is a slightly older woman, splendidly dressed in lace-trimmed taffeta. She comes over to kiss your cheeks in the French style. Hans ducks his head as she smiles at you; you can’t help but feel similar trepidation. She is terribly striking, with delicate creases on either side of her mouth and a mysterious twinkle in her eye.
“The hotel in town is my establishment,” she tells you. “The bath house, as well.”
“Oh,” you say, “how lovely.”
Her smile quirks at the corners; she looks at Hans, then back to you, and softly chucks your chin. “You’re a pretty thing, aren’t you, darling?”
“Yes, Madame, thank you,” your husband says quickly as your face sets to blazing. “I believe others would like to speak to us, as well, if you don’t mind.”
She gives you another enigmatic smile, tightens the light chiffon wrap around her shoulders, and leaves you to the banker and his wife, who both eagerly step up to talk your ear off.
Farmers, other ranchers, ramblers and gamblers and trappers; it seems everyone in the state has come to pay you their respects, and they all want to meet you at the exact same time. The rough voice you heard in the kitchen manifests itself in the form of a burly man with mutton chops, who introduces himself as John Price the saloon owner. A young woman with an unsmiling face named Ms. Boucher tells you your first purchase at her dry goods store will be discounted by five percent, as a welcome gift from her to you. She punctuates the statement with a narrow-eyed look at your husband, but you have no time to wonder at it before the next guests capture your attention.
A whole line of Hans’ cowboys, headed by the woman you saw working at the writing desk when you arrived, form up to tell you their names and pledge you their loyalty, still dressed in their wrangling leathers but bathed and combed and polished for the occasion nonetheless. The woman introduces herself as Kate Laswell, the foreman.
“I took care of the accounting after Anna passed,” Laswell says to you. “Tomorrow I’ll go through the books with you. It’ll be your job from now on.”
“Now, Kate, you shouldn’t discuss business at my wedding,” says Hans, politely, but somewhat terse. “And besides, that would be far too much for my new bride.”
“Hans, I told you,” you say earnestly, referencing a summer letter, “I want to be a part of things.”
He smiles genially at you—but the expression seems tight. “Of course, dear.”
“Tomorrow,” Kate says to you. Curiously, she looks you up and down. Then, “You’ll need to see the tailor, as well, I think.”
Her words are not said unkindly, but they shame you anyway, reminding you just how poorly matched as yet you are to this life. When you’d put the dress on earlier, it had been immediately clear to you that it was not made to your measurements, but you hadn’t thought it would be so obvious to anyone else. Only Hans’ cowboys proceeding to introduce themselves saves you from having to respond.
One is conspicuously absent.
Unexpectedly, it hurts. Even though it shouldn’t. Gaz had only driven you here, after all. You’ve known him less than a day. It shouldn’t disappoint you, as you keep your eyes on the moving line, that he does not come forward, but it does.
In between meeting the county folk, you manage to get a few bites of the wedding feast—prime rib, lamb chowder, baked fish, seasoned potatoes, collard greens, fried tomatoes, sourdough biscuits, and three different fruit cobblers still somehow steaming from the oven. You and Hans cut the bride’s cake, an impressive sheet of angel food and ivory buttercream that he must have procured at outrageous cost; you are not embarrassed to wolf it down in front of Hans’ guests. It’s the sweetest, softest thing you’ve ever eaten, more delicate than you ever could have imagined any food could be.
As the sky darkens overhead, the faint cloud of the milky way coalesces in the light of the waxing moon, and the band takes up a lively jig as the wedding party sallies forth to the clearing to dance arm in arm. Your husband whirls you along with them, arm around your waist, and then you’re dancing, too, and the familiar two-step lifts your flagging spirits as the cool night air runs quick, soft fingers across your burning cheeks.
So what if some cowboy hadn’t made it to your wedding? You’re dancing with your husband, after months of longing for him; everything and everyone else is inconsequential laid up against this triumph.
Faces blur in the lamplight the night falls indigo around you, and as the music changes Hans twirls you into a new set of arms in a jaunt that has everyone exchanging partners. They hold you only briefly before the music changes again, and off you bounce to another, the world spinning around you faster and faster, jubilant and surreal, and then another—
Suddenly you are in Kyle Garrick’s arms.
He catches you like lassoing a runaway horse, taking your momentum into the pillar of his body as he winds you in close. One of his hands spreads warm across your back, fingers spanning what feels like the entire breadth of your waist. His other cradles your own in his palm, long fingers folded around it like an envelope. You fit against him easily, perfectly, like a couple illustrated in a storybook.
“Mr. Garrick,” you gasp.
“Mrs. König,” he says.
Suddenly you realize you’re out of breath. You take deep gulps of air, and Gaz’s scent permeates your lungs. Lavender soap and bay rum, polished leather, sweet hay. The soft, dense curls of his hair are combed and parted a little, and the short stubble he’d greeted you with on the train platform is tonsured down flush to his jaw.
He leans in closer to you, hovers his lips near to one ear. “You changed your dress.”
He doesn’t keep pace with the other dancers, or swing you around in time with the music; he lets the world slow around you both, the music falling away as he brings the pace of your heart down with soft line of his mouth and the steady, still look in his dark eyes. His hand on your back radiates so much warmth that it cuts through the evening chill just beginning to set in, as if his palm is directly against your naked skin.
You smile meekly. “It wasn’t appropriate for a wedding.”
His dark brows pull together; his hands tighten their purchase on you. You watch him avert his eyes from you, take a great breath in through flared nostrils.
“Mr. Garrick,” you say, feeling too honest, “do you disapprove of me?”
He snaps his gaze back to you. “Why would you think that?”
You swallow. “You don’t seem very pleased, whenever we talk, is all.”
Suddenly Gaz smiles—lets out a short, sharp laugh that bares his even teeth, shows the points of his canines. “That’s not your fault. I promise you.”
“Then what is it?”
He gazes at you. Lamplight casts the angles of his face in shadow, deepens the darkness of his eyes. His shoulder is solid beneath where your hand rests, shaped hard by a life on the range; you could lay the entirety of your weight against him, you think, and he wouldn’t even sway with holding you up. There’s something very present about Kyle Garrick. Something real. It draws you in like the earth draws the moon into its orbit.
“Do you really want this?” he asks you.
You blink. “Of course I do.”
“You hardly know him.”
“I’ve known him for half a year, Mr. Garrick,” you say, somewhat unsure how much explanation you owe this cowboy. After all, you’d vowed to earn his trust, as his employer’s new wife. “I know you might have some reservations about me. I understand, really.”
“No,” says Gaz immediately, dark brows low and serious over his eyes. “Not about you.”
“Mrs. König!” an accented voice calls.
Immediately the world speeds up around you again, music crashing back into your ears, wedding guests spinning and leaping around you, and you turn to see your husband standing at the edge of the clearing.
The dancing comes to a halt at the sound of his voice; Hans outstretches one hand toward you.
“I believe it is time for us to retire,” he says.
Gaz’s hands tighten on you again. You feel the eyes of the other dancers on the two of you, tight lines of attention between you and them.
You have felt it all evening, really—the undercurrent lining every conversation, the askance looks tossed at you and your husband when no one thought you’d notice. The pervading sense of some drama playing out just outside of your comprehension.
You turn to look back at Gaz. His mouth is pressed into a hard line. The wells of his eyes are ink-dark, opaque, eclipsed by something of a shape beyond your knowing. He says nothing as he holds your gaze, only watches you with an expectation so stoic, so resigned, that you feel almost guilty for releasing him.
He lets you go as if his grasp wasn’t even tight in the first place. You turn away from him, from the stone-hard expression on his face, and go to slide your fingers into your husband’s waiting hand.
Wolf-whistles populate the night air as he smiles approvingly, nods, and leads you away. Short bursts of knowing applause behind you draw your shoulders tight together.
“Ignore them,” says Hans, tucking your hand into the crook of his arm. “They’re just fools.”
You look back over your shoulder. Gaz still stands amid the dancers, a wide berth around him. His eyes have not left you; they pierce you in the night, sharp even as the distance between you grows.
You have only one other point of reference, aside from your mother’s tutelage, for how the end of this evening might go. A topaz glimmering in the folds of your memory.
Years ago, before the shine had worn off as it usually does with older siblings, you’d worshiped your oldest brother like he was Jesus Christ returned. You’d trailed after him like a newborn pup, dogging his every step, hoping your devotion would earn you even the smallest scraps of his affection. You’d watched his comings and goings like you could divine the mysteries of God from the merest angle of his movements.
One night, far past the time when everyone should be asleep, he’d slipped out of the small three-room house your family shared. You knew, because you slept closest to the door, and by then could recognize him by the rhythm of his footsteps. Like any nosy little sibling, you’d followed him out once you were sure he couldn’t hear you behind him.
He’d made his creeping way toward the barn, his path and yours lit only by a waxing moon. You remember, sneaking along after him, noticing a dim glow emanating from the cracks in the hayloft door, and guessed that your brother had realized he’d forgotten to snuff a lantern before going to bed—and now he was going to put it out, rather than leave a hay fire to chance.
He went inside. You were about to follow (no sibling, however divine, was exempt from a good ribbing, and nearly burning down the barn was excellent blackmail fodder)—when you heard another voice.
A female voice. Soft, and sweet, and welcoming.
Very little preamble separated that revelation from the next, and what you heard in the following moments rooted you there in place; movement. Rustling. For the span of a few heartbeats, nothing except for the crickets in the fields—and then, like the moon rising on a cloudless night—a growing chorus, voices high and low, moaning together in staccato.
You’d stood there, frozen absolutely solid, as it went on. The high voice lifted higher, and higher, carried on frantic, rapid breaths, until it cut off with a shriek that muffled so fast you knew your brother had covered the girl’s mouth.
Then—quiet, shared laughter.
So you know a little more than what the goats taught you.
Hans leads you back inside the house, where the lanterns have been turned to low, orange specks of light. You fix your eyes on the nape of his neck ahead of you as the two of you climb the stairs, making your way back to the master bedroom. The cacophony of the wedding celebration is far away; he opens the door, draws you inside, and shuts it behind him.
You stand in the middle of the room, looking at him. This whole evening has felt like a dream, but as you gaze at your husband, you suddenly feel like you’re waking up. You have not been alone with Hans since you met him, not really, and you realize he hasn’t felt quite real to you because of it. You almost feel as if you can see him, for the first time, see the words that have made him up in your memory coalesce into the flesh-and-blood man standing before you.
This is him. This is Hans. This is the man you love.
Softly, you approach him. Reach up with two hands to take his face in them; press your lips, shyly, unpracticed, to his.
“Hans,” you say, more softly than you have ever said anyone’s name in your life, looking into the pale blue of his eyes.
He gazes down at you. “Let’s get undressed,” he says.
It’s the moment you expected, but it daunts you nonetheless. You nod, step away from your husband, and he sets to the task—he shucks his coat, dropping it on the floor, and unhooks his suspenders. Swiftly you turn away from him when he begins unbuttoning his shirt, face blazing—of course, you’ve seen men undress before, you have three brothers, but this—this—
The reality of what you are about to do douses you all at once, soaking you to the bone. When you bring your hands up to the buttons of your bodice, they are trembling; you can barely get the tiny pearls between your fingers to undo them. You hear more clothes land on the floor behind you as you struggle, and then nothing. Stillness.
His eyes are heavy on your back. He is silent as you finally get the jacket off, and the blouse along with it; he is silent as you push the skirt down over your hips, the garment piling on the floor.
Your whole body is shaking by the time you’re down only to your chemise, shivering like a foal on new legs as you bare your shoulders. You close your eyes. There’s no need to be afraid as you shuffle the garment down your back. It’s only your husband behind you, looking at you as you bare your buttocks, as you step out of the split shorts, as the cool night air caresses your naked belly.
“That’s enough,” Hans says behind you when your hands go to the ties on your stockings.
You go still.
“Get on the bed, now.”
-
You focus on your breathing. Long breaths, in and out, as you crawl belly-first onto the mattress, which sinks luxuriously under your weight, softer than any bed you’ve lain on in your life. Suddenly, before you have time to adjust, the mattress sinks even more under you, and an envelope of heat and weight looms over you, pressing hard onto you, bare skin and the smell of sweat and the sound of another person’s breathing over you invading your senses.
Then there’s something blunt nudging at the entrance of your sex. A hand on your hip, gripping tight. The blunt thing circles briefly, parting your folds, and then is pressing into you. Pressing in somewhere tight, somewhere that doesn’t want to open to let it in. You hold your breath. It presses harder, fighting the resistance, and then finally gets past it, just a half inch or so—and suddenly it hurts.
“Hans,” you whisper.
He hasn’t seem to have heard you. He pushes harder, just a bit further. There’s another wall of resistance, this one needling and far more solid. You gasp sharply at the dryness of it, the way his member seems to want to push your own folds up into you as it tries to get in, shoving, bludgeoning, and then, mercifully, Hans pulls away.
It’s on the tip of your tongue to suggest that maybe the two of you try this later. Clearly there is something about you that’s not ready for it—but then his hand is between your legs, smearing something slippery around, and just briefly he touches something that pulses with interest. You jolt as little sparks of pleasure dance through you but quickly burn out, and then, the blunt head of his cock is back, pushing in, much faster, much smoother, huge and hard—
Suddenly it is sharp inside you, razor sharp, paralyzing. You shriek in pain, tears welling acidic in your eyes, shocked, betrayed, and he keeps coming, an endless length of him forcing inside, making room where there is none, going somewhere it clearly must not belong—and then he groans, loud and guttural, and begins to pull out.
You don’t have enough time to mistake this for the end of it. He pulls out halfway and then rams back in, slamming against your body, punching what must be the very limit of the space he can make for himself in your body. Pain roars to life around his cock, radiating outward, a ripping and shredding that grows as he forces himself into you again, and then again, and then it’s happening for real, he’s begins thrusting so fast it knocks the breath from your lungs, slapping his hips against your backside as he grunts and groans behind you like a dumb animal. He batters some nexus of agony that sends you screaming, shrieking with every jerk of his hips, tears streaming down your face as you grip the blanket in clawed fingers.
“Please, Hans, stop, please!”you wail. “Stop, stop, stop—”
His hand grips back of your head, turning your face downward—pressing it against the bed, muffling your mouth and nose and eyes into the blanket—
He jerks against you as agony writes itself into your bone marrow. Your hands circle in on themselves so tightly you feel your fingernails bite into your palms. Any memory of laughter you ever had abandons you.
Then, suddenly, mercifully, he’s forcing himself into you as deeply as he can, groaning loud, and something warm blooms in you, squelches out warm and sticky as he pulls in and out a few more times. He stills then from his furious rutting, hanging over you, panting.
Then he pulls out. Your husband lets you go and rolls over, breathing hard on the bed. You lay absolutely dead still, shaking violently, every muscle in your body tensed up painfully tight.
“Hans,” you whimper, “Hans.”
“Mm-hm,” he hums.
“Hans.” Every nerve is vibrating with pain. “Hans, that hurt.”
There is a long silence after. So long, you start to believe that he won’t say anything; that perhaps, even, he’s fallen asleep, and your words have dropped like flies from the air between you before they reached him.
But he hasn’t fallen asleep. Your husband shuffles off the bed, lifts the linen, and shuffles back into it. The lantern light is dim in the bedroom, but light enough that you can see the nonplussed expression on his face.
“Anna got used to it,” he says finally, eyes closing. “You will too.”
And he turns on his side and says no more to you.
You lay there aching. When you drag your fingers through the slick mess between your thighs, streaks of red intermingle with the clear and the white.
Suddenly you want this day to be over. You want to close your eyes and dream that it never happened—or maybe, if you go to sleep, you’ll awaken to find that it was all a dream after all, and you’re still home, your mother cooking just outside the bedroom door. Slowly, you inch off the bed, finding the floor with your stockinged feet, and go to douse the lanterns.
The room is cold and silvery without their light. Darkness gathers in the corners, around the weak glow of moonlight failing to fully penetrate the curtains over the window. You gingerly swipe the cloth from a nearby washbasin between your legs, cleaning up the remnants of your husband’s pleasure, and then, with nowhere else to go, you return to the empty side of the bed and crawl stiffly under the covers.
He does not stir as you settle in beside him. You lay your head on the pillow next to his and fold your hands over your stomach.
Outside and far away, you think you can hear the band still merrily playing. The darkness deepens, and deepens, until you can’t tell where it ends and you begin.
-
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southern-gothic-comic · 2 months ago
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Page 83
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(Author's Notes)
Panel 1: Sometime later. Laudna sits outside on a swing she has made, looking forlorn and still a little sulky, letting her rat climb around in her hair. Evening is deepening into dusk around her.
Panel 2: She raises her head at the approach of a parade of lights appearing between the trees like will-o-the-wisps.
Panel 3: Quickly it becomes apparent that they aren’t fairies but lanterns and torches being held by the grim figures of an adventuring party emerging from the gloom. Sighting her, the leader, a man in armor, points in her direction and shouts.
Panel 4: (narrow, between wide black space where the violence has been elided) She tries to run, but her pursuers catch up with her.
Laudna: Come back. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Come back. Help me!
But Delilah does not.
Panel 5: Later. It’s raining. She is lying in the woods where she was struck down by the “heroes,” at the feet of an ancient statue of a robed figure broken and weathered beyond recognizability and partly sunken into the earth. A few crossbow bolts protrude from her chest and she is bleeding darkly from the slashes of blades. Her rat nuzzles at her in distress.
Panel 6: She stirs feebly, whimpering, as Delilah’s magic begins to crawl over her wounds, stitching them.
Delilah: Lie still, child. Let me mend you.
Laudna: ‘m sorry
Delilah: Shh. I know you are.
Panel 7: She climbs into the statue’s lap and buries her face in its skirts. The shadows of the surrounding forest surround her in an embrace.
Laudna: Please don’t go away again. I don’t want to be alone.
Delilah: I’m here. I won’t ever leave you.
Laudna: (quietly) I love you.
Delilah: And I you, darling.
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the-kr8tor · 2 months ago
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Okay, but like, what about Hobie x a reader who's like, super resilient? As in resistant to physical dmg. Like idk how to word it, but someone who like, accidentally chops of half her finger then is like, "Oh no, I'm fine :)" then puts rubbing alcohol on it. And he's just like freaking out like there's so much blood on the counter?? Idk, I just thought it'd be funny because I'm kinda like that irl ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Thank you so much for requesting!! I loved writing it ❤️
Pairing: Hobie Brown x gn! Reader/ Spider-Punk x gn! Reader
Word count: 1.2k
Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, cw blood, cw injury, cw food mentions, established relationship, FLUFF.
A/N: a bit late for another Halloween fic lol it's still Halloween somewhere right? (Wrong)
ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ
The cinnamon smelling cookies in the oven makes your stomach grumble. With your hands occupied with the pumpkin carving knives, you pout at the rumbling feeling. You and Hobie are speedily carving out pumpkins together during Halloween night. You would've done it earlier on your own but you wanted to carve them together with Hobie. Unfortunately, Goblin doesn't care about the holiday despite his pumpkin shaped bombs.
So you're carving away, chipping at the face you've doodled that Hobie lovingly told you that it looks eerily like you. Which earned him a face full of pumpkin guts thrown at him.
Hobie senses your hunger, and how you're carving away without care. “Love, it's not a competition.”
“I know, but the trick or treaters will be here any minute!” You huff, poking out a finished ‘eye’ in your pumpkin. One down, a few more shapes to go. “Besides, that movie we watched the other day fucked me up, I don't want to be murdered by a pumpkin demon for not having a jack o’ lantern on our doorstep.”
He chuckles, going around the counter and abandoning his own half finished pumpkin. “The little demon won't come ‘ere knowin’ that ‘m over ‘ere, lovie.” You give him a look as he slides his arms around your middle, chin perched on your shoulder as he rubs his chin on you lovingly. “‘sides, this was supposed to be fun, remember?” Pecking your cheek, you lean closer as he smothers your jaw in warm kisses. Who needs a chimney when you've got your walking furnace right beside you? “Slow down for me, yeah?” Whispering lowly in your ear that sends goosebumps on your arms, he rubs them away with an even warmer hand before he reluctantly moves away to check on the cookies.
“Yeah,” you say with a lovestruck smile, turning around to see Hobie bending down while cracking open the hot oven and shutting it off. “You're right, this is fun, Hobie.” You take the opportunity to ogle him with a tilt of your head. He senses your eyes on his behind of course, prompting him to quickly look over his shoulder, catching you mid turn as you pretend you weren't eyeing him down.
Hobie slides himself next to you on the counter, elbow placed on the cold tiles, chin resting on his palm with a smirk on his pretty lips. “Saw somethin' you like?”
You glance at him, trying to tamp down your laughter. “Well, your jack o' lantern isn't done yet, I don't like that.”
Hobie was about to steal a kiss right on your smug lips but the doorbell ringing and the unmistakable chime of children outside interrupts him. “Tight arse.” He says against your pursed lips before walking away to grab the bowl of candy on the table.
“Flat ass.” You call after him as he makes his way to the front door. He chuckles as he opens it, and the trick or treaters’ voices echoes inside.
Shaking your head with a grin, you continue to chip away at the pumpkin, following the zig zagged line of its serrated smile. As you chop and cut, you hear Hobie giving out candies.
“Nice costume, little man.” He says, and you're sure he's giving the kid a full sized chocolate bar based on the lilt of his tone. “Spider-Man himself would be jealous, eh?”
You wanted to see what the said costume looks like, so with a quick peek while you're cutting out the last bits of pumpkin, you smile at the kid's homemade costume. It's even complete with Hobie's signature spikes and leather vest. Your smile falters as you feel something warm trickle from the pads of your thumb, looking down, you see crimson ebb from your fingertip down into the jack o’ lantern’s grin.
“Oh.”
Hobie's senses tingle as he shuts the door with a quick farewell to the kid. Goosebumps rise on his nape, head blaring alarms in his ears. Turning around to see what his senses are pointing at, he almost drops the bowl of candy when he sees your blood flowing from your hand, pooling down on the white countertops.
“Shit, love.” He speed walks towards you, hands outstretched to cradle your bleeding finger. “What happened?”
“I nicked myself, I'm fine.” The amount of red flowing out from the cut says otherwise. “I just need to wash it.”
“Fuck, you're bleedin’ a lot.” He curses under his breath as he helps you towards the kitchen sink, opening the faucet to let the warm water wash the crimson away. “You alright? How do you feel?” The sink water quickly blends in with your blood as it goes down the drain.
“I'm fine—” Hobie's already grabbing a clean towel from the rack, “Hobie—” he's wrapping it around your finger, watching the blood stain the white cloth. “Don't worry, I'm really fine.”
“It won't stop.” His eyes widen at how fast the red overtakes the pristine cloth. “Shit,” he wraps it tighter, and you don't even hiss or groan. Flicking his worried eyes at you, he sees you shrug at him. “You don't feel that?”
“I told you, I'm fine.”
“Bein' fine and not feelin’ any pain ain't the same. What if you nicked a nerve or some shit?”
“I don't think so,” you take a peek at the now drenched cloth. “Can you grab me the alcohol, please?” You say, awfully calm about the blood you're quickly losing.
“Alcohol?!” He scoffs out, guiding you down on the dining chair, just in case you faint. “Love, that won't help the bleedin’, It'll hurt you more.”
You bat your lashes at him, smiling as if you're not bleeding profusely. “Please?”
He sighs, remembering the med kit you have in your cabinet for him whenever he comes home with various wounds after a harsh patrol. “No, I'll get a proper disinfectant.”
“But, alcohol works best on me—”
“No,” he chuckles nervously, feeling your warm crimson on his palms. “If this doesn't stop in a minute, ‘m bringin’ you to hospital.”
“It's just a cut, I need alcohol, that's all.”
Hobie stands up, hands on his hips. It's his turn to take care of you, no matter how stubborn you are. “Stay ‘ere, if you feel faint yell for me, yeah?”
You huff in your seat, surrendering to his coddling. “Okay,” he enters your bathroom, knowing what he's already rifling through. “I don't need stitches, Hobie!”
“If you keep bein' like this, I'll stitch you up.”
“Okay, doctor Frankenstein!” You blink away the sudden dizziness and black dots dancing in your vision. “Hey, Hobie.”
“Yeah?” He makes his way back to you with the med kit, senses blaring at him.
“I feel a bit light headed actually—” You fall forward, eyes rolling on the back of your head.
“Love—!” He catches you in time. Putting his arms around you to carry you in a bridal hold. Even with his thudding heart and heavy worry, he calmly brings you towards the front door. As he opens it, he's greeted by a group of costumed children, their screams of terror at your bloodied hand almost freezes him in place. “Shit, it's not—!” They run away from the house, still screaming in horror. “Damn it.”
As he carries you towards the car, he'll make sure you'll never hear the end of his teasing after you've come too and hopefully better after some treatment.
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okay so i saw this tiktok and immediately said 'but what if steddie?' so here you go!
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Steve honestly can't believe he let Robin convince him to go to this goddamn haunted house...attraction...thing.
He also can't believe that they somehow got separated. Them! The two peas in a pod who share the same braincell!
Now he's wandering the place alone, and in the goddamn dark. Following whatever sparks of light he can find, though he knows that's just gonna lead him to more scares.
'and to the exit, Dingus.' Robin's voice says in his head.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'm almost out of here anyway, right?" he says aloud to no one.
"Wrong you are, pretty boy." a husky voice says into his ear from the dark, and Steve's running.
Running, running, running, somehow not tripping over shit in the dark, just letting his instincts take him wherever they want while some freak in a mask and wielding a machete follows close behind, cackling all the while.
The thing also says things like, "They're so much sweeter when fear courses through their veins!" and "The pretty ones always die first, that's why I'm still around." each followed by more unhinged cackles.
Finally, Steve turns a corner to find blinding light. Well, blinding to the rest of the place at least.
A steady light comes from a lantern beside a chainlink gate. He dashes to it, thinking its salvation, only to find a blank black wall behind it.
It was only another set piece.
"Oh fuck."
"Hello sweet thing,"
Steve spins, pressing his back against the fence behind him, heart hammering through his whole body.
The creature, in a bloody pig mask, as Steve can see now, chuckles hoarsely when he comes around the corner..and in the way of the only exit.
"Oh, fuck."
"Oh darling, there won't be time for any of that, now will there?"
Steve registers everything he can about the thing as it stalks closer. He's about Steve's height, slighter in build from the legs he can see under the ratty gown thing he wears, and he's immediately got a plan.
"You would look so sweet under me, though, wouldn't you?"
Damn, this guys' been flirting with him this whole time. Weird, unhinged haunted house flirting, but flirting nonetheless.
Another piece of the plan slots into place.
"C'mon darling, why so quiet? Lemme hear those screa---"
The thing surges forward, machete raised, so Steve shoots out an arm, catching his wrist and gripping tight.
With the other, he shoves at the thing's shoulder and spins them, pinning it against the metal fence with a clang.
Finally, Steve sets his moves to stun; dropping the thing's arm and using both hands to lift the plastic pig mask up over the actor's face, everything slows to a crawl.
Steve takes in the face of the actor pinned under him in a split second. He's just about the same age as Steve, with long dark hair that frizzes out under the lip of the mask where it's caught between it and his face. His face, thoroughly sweaty and flushed from chasing people around all night, is looking up at him in shock with big dark eyes and...holy shit..
Is it ethical to fall in love at first sight at a haunted house? With the thing guy that was chasing you?
Time speeds up again and Steve surges forward this time, locking his hands along the man's jaw instead of on the mask, letting it fall down onto his face as he kisses him.
Deep, quick, and with a quick flash of tongue before he's spinning and racing back out the way he came, this time being lucky enough to find the exit along a path he had taken the wrong fork in last time.
"Holy shit, Steve! There you are! What happened??" Robin catches him as he clambers though the curtain covered exit.
"I..." he takes a deep breath, holding himself up by his knees "I fell in love."
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ehehehe there's a part 2 to this :o)
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