#you know this actually happened ages back in another fandom i'm in

[voidsaber]

#3 you can (not) redo

[anneapocalypse]

I cannot help feeling like the tendency to see Inquisition!Leliana in stark contrast to Origins!Leliana has led to some people forgetting what... Leliana is actually like in Origins.

In fairness, as in all Dragon Age games some very revealing character moments happen in party banter which makes it easy to miss. But the gentle-hearted mystic who desires only to draw others unto the love of the Maker has never been all that Leliana is, and it's always been in direct conflict with the side of her that is not only adept at intrigue and yes, violence, but enjoys those things. This is the central conflict of her whole character, and it's not a trivial conflict, because there is not one simple answer to who Leliana truly is. She is both of these things. She is deeply religious and finds comfort in her faith, and thinks it should bring comfort to others as well. She's also prone to gossip and pettiness and all the qualities that helped her thrive as a bard.

There's this one particularly revealing piece of banter with Alistair if the Warden is in a romance with Morrigan:

Alistair: So have you heard? Morrigan and him are... you know. Leliana: Have you nothing better to do than to spread idle gossip? And besides, he can probably hear us both. You're not being very discreet. Alistair: No, look, he's not even paying attention. Leliana: Hmmm. maybe. You don't... think that he's serious about it, do you? The woman is a vile fiend. Alistair: Well, look here, now who's an idle gossip? Me-ow! Leliana: You're the one who started this, I might remind you. And I'm... well, I'm ending it!

I once had the especially entertaining experience of getting this banter, and minutes later hearing Leliana turn to Morrigan to give her the "It's so nice that you're together, isn't love wonderful?" line. But whether or not you have the pleasure of hearing them back to back, I think this dialogue make it pretty clear that while Leliana would like not to think of herself as a gossip, it takes very little prompting from Alistair to get her to slip back into that mean girl persona. And Alistair (who is more perceptive than he often gets credit for), calls her on it immediately, clearly embarrassing Leliana--who realizes that her mask has slipped.

I don't think it follows from this that Leliana necessarily hates Morrigan unilaterally. There's something much more complex going on between them, in my opinion, because they are such distinct opposites in upbringing and personality. Both Leliana's faith and her life of courtly intrigue are nonsense to Morrigan, who neither believes in the Maker nor has much patience for intricate social graces (at least, not yet). Meanwhile, I think Morrigan's outward self-possession and the sense of power she exudes is a source of both fascination and frustration for Leliana, who thinks she understands power, both social and divine--but finds in Morrigan a kind she cannot fully comprehend. (I also think you can definitely feel some sexual tension into their banter, especially the much-beloved banter about the velvet dress.) Ultimately, both of them are very concerned with power, but approach that concept very differently. And Leliana responds to this clash of ideals in a particular way because her own self-image is so conflicted.

As all great Dragon Age foils do, Leliana and Morrigan needle one another, push each other's buttons, challenge one another's sense of self, and in doing so reveal one another in their complexity and sometimes in their ugliness. It is perhaps easy to write this off as the tired trope of women being unable to get along with one another, or conversely to claim that they get along just fine and fandom has fabricated the tensions between them; I think to do either of those things diminishes a genuinely complex and sticky relationship that serves to reveal a lot about both characters.

[olderthannetfic]

hi, as someone who is tragically gen Z and only ever read AO3, can I ask: what was so great about LiveJournal? Like, I know that there were fics posted there (and I've even read about the "purge", so I get why it isn't used anymore) and that it was sort of a forum-type thing. But what I don't understand, wouldn't Tumblr fill in the latter function? How was that site any different? I see a lot of people reminiscing about it and I'm confused

--

A big factor in LJ's greatness is timing and nostalgia.

It was genuinely great, but it wasn't quite as great as all of the Lo, shall the Golden Age ne'er come again? posts suggest.

LJ arrived at a pivotal time in the development of the internet both in terms of technical stuff and how many people had access. Many fans who are now in their thirties to fifties first discovered fandom through LJ and many were at a time in their lives when they were feeling energetic and up to making lots of new friends—and to figuring out how to make a site work for them.

I got on LJ in 2002 when it required invites. Fandom arrived in droves in 2003, first via coordinated campaigns to get invites to key people and then when LJ opened up free account creation to everyone. Back then, LJ's features sucked. It was impossible to search properly, among other things. At its height (2005-7, let's say), there was a reasonable site search, and fans had developed all sorts of community resources for finding each other.

People often remember this phase but not the early days of suckitude.

This development parallels how Tumblr used to not have that private chat feature and how a lot of fuckyeah[whatever] type tumblrs have helped curate the site and make it much more usable for fans. Fandom draining away from LJ after strikethrough also parallels people draining away from Tumblr after the purge.

There are people who talk about Tumblr the way my cohort talks about LJ...

And to the shock of no one, they are people who came of age on Tumblr, who found fandom via Tumblr, who were on Tumblr during pivotal times in their lives and ones when they had energy to make friends and figure out how a site worked.

Those same Tumblrites are now making all the same geriatric-sounding posts we LJers do about how other sites lack the required features to be good for fandom while missing that 90% of tumblr's "features" at its height (2012-2016, let's say) were actually fan-created and were basically the same as any fandom newsletter or links page or all the versions of this kind of personal curation stretching back to long before the internet existed.

What life phase you hit a site at matters.

--

With all of that said, no, LJ was not a forum. It was a blogging site with threaded comments.

The key point to understand is that conversation was always happening in a specific person's space. Unlike on a true forum, people were in the comments on a particular post in a journal owned by another fan. (On a forum, there's the first post in a thread, but it's still more of a communal space with less of a hierarchy.)

Overall, the LJ format can have a feeling a bit like you're over at someone's house for tea. There's more of a sense of intimacy and also behaving yourself in front of community members.

Tumblr being obscure and impossible to find anything in does give it some of the same vibe relative to Twitter, but it's still part of modern social media that tries to shove every rando into the face of every other rando.

But it wasn't just vibes: LJ also had robust privacy features where you could lock a post to this or that group of friends. You could moderate your comments section properly. Tumblr has far fewer controls to force people to behave or leave on a technical level.

--

The biggest thing many people miss about LJ is the threaded comments. At least by late LJ and on Dreamwidth, you can expand and collapse threads, making it far easier to deal with a massive comments section. But more than that, things are properly threaded with multiple levels of hierarchy that are all easily visible in the same place.

On Tumblr, it used to be extremely difficult to find all of the actual commentary on a post. Nowadays, it's far easier, but you still have to scroll chronologically, and multiple versions of a post with a long chain of commentary may be much more divorced from each other than what would happen in a LJ comments section.

--

But could we use Tumblr pretty much how we used LJ?

We could.

I do.

--

The key things that people tend to miss about LJ, aside from the younger and more excited version of themselves or the friends they've lost since then, are:

Heavily text-based

It may sound odd on the modern internet, but there are a lot of people whose brains don't like or handle an image-heavy site well. They were everywhere in SF book fandom. They were everywhere on the early internet. Today, they're hanging out on Dreamwidth and still going to their SF cons. They're usually not on Tumblr.

You could follow the discussion

Threaded comments help, but a lot of it is about having some place you can check for updates. It wasn't actually that easy to follow big LJ discussions unless you were subscribed to comments and reading along as things were happening instead of coming along after the entire mass of comments had been left.

The tone of the discussion is intellectual and one's enemies are "idiots", not "problematic"

All this requires is a penchant for longwindedness and an itchy blocking finger to remove anyone slinging ad hominems from the comments section.

On tumblr, it's as simple as conversations happening in the replies on a popular account and that person not tolerating suibaiting and threats.

(And make no mistake, a lot of LJ discussion was in the comments on popular accounts, not spread equally between everyone's.)

It does require that multiple people like that tone and want to engage in that way, but lots of people do want to.

--

These days, I interact with tumblr by checking my askbox and reading my activity page. The vast, vast majority of my posts are ones where I'm the OP, so if I block someone, they're booted from the discussion entirely.

For me... yeah, Tumblr functions almost exactly like LJ.

Also like LJ, while I'm hosting the conversation, if you hang around, you'll see the same people again and again in the comments. They may or may not also host that kind of conversation in their space, and there's a larger pool of lurkers who have some notion of which people count as regulars. Other people are watching from the shadows, enjoying or deriding the takes of the usual crowd.

People presumably do like reading my lengthy commentary or they wouldn't be here, but my tumblr wouldn't be popular like this without a healthy pool of other people who chime in regularly. It's not just that there are more people: it's that you see the same people over time. There's a bit more sense of place and community than on some parts of the internet.

--

So, in my opinion, the failure to just recreate LJ fandom on Tumblr was a skill issue.

Threaded comments were great, but LJ culture came from mailing lists, and mailing lists had the same issue as tumblr with the diverging threads.

We solved that back then by clipping out only the parts we wanted to respond to (you'd write "snip" around the quotation to show it was incomplete). We solved the smaller LJ issue by linking to other posts we were referencing and doing discussion link roundups. We solve it on tumblr by, again, linking to what we're talking about and even quoting multiple reblog chains in our own reblog of just one chain.

--

Tumblr's technical features and even general crap-ness aren't really the problem. 90s and early 00s sites regularly went down for periods of time unthinkable today.

The missing piece is people.

When one is in an active fandom with others who curate or with friends who let one know what's up, a site with imperfect features is easy to figure out and retrofit for fandom's needs. When one already feels out of touch and is between fannish passions—or at least fannish passions anyone else cares about—seeing the potential in a new site is hard.

--

Threaded comments are different and better.

LJ's built-in way to see everyone's blog in your own style was better. The automatic timestamps and the ease of seeing a paginated archive of an entire blog was better than tumblr's endless scroll and lack of clear date labeling. But some of that can be fixed with xkit or knowing your way around tumblr well.

A lot of it is nostalgia for the lj era and a refusal to take the time to figure out how to use tumblr in an oldschool internet way.

--

So by all means, people, weigh in about what made LJ great or how the culture felt at the time...

But if I see one more god damn response going "You can't have a conversation on tumblr!" in reply to my tumblr, which contains nothing but conversation, I am coming for you.

[jokeringcutio]

Stepdad! William Afton x Reader – ‘Boyfriend’ (SMUT)

Summary: You bring home a boy. Your mother is excited. Your stepdad…not so. Cue to stepdad William Afton staking his claim and reminding you who you truly belong to.

Fandom: FNAF (inspired by the movie verse) Pairing: William Afton x Reader Rating: Explicit Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content (SMUT), Age difference, Older man x Younger woman, stepdad x daughter!reader, dub-con, implied con, taboofic, spanking, fingering, cunnilingus, p in v sex, secret!sex, jealousy!, threats, hair pulling, unsafe sex, creampie, breeding!kink implied, infidelity, implied established stepdadxreader, William Afton is not a nice man, William Afton is a bad dad.

Boyfriend

Flashing him an encouraging smile, you stepped into the warmth of your home, the chill from the outside air dissipating. Your mother bustled about in the kitchen, the familiar scents of her cooking enveloping you like a comforting embrace. As she turned to greet you, her gaze fell upon Sam, who stood just behind you.

"Mom," you said, motioning towards the young man beside you. "Remember Sam?"

Sam was undeniably handsome; his blond hair framed a chiseled face adorned with bright green eyes that seemed to capture every bit of light in the room. His tall frame filled out the doorway, exuding a quiet strength that immediately caught your mother's attention. Her eyes twinkled as she looked him over.

"Nice to meet you,” Sam said politely, extending a hand that your mother eagerly shook. Her eyes traced over his broad shoulders and the white toothy smile.

"You are on the football team, aren’t you?" she replied warmly, her excitement barely contained.

“I am,” Sam confirmed, his smile broadening, reminiscing you of ancient statues of Greek Heroes and Gods. He was picture-perfect. Just the right type of boy to take home to impress your mother with.

"Actually, Mom," you hesitated for just a moment before continuing, voice shy and eyelashes fluttering, "Sam and I are dating.”

"Really?" Her eyes widened, a grin spreading across her face. "Oh, how wonderful!" She clapped her hands together in delight.

“Your daughter is a gem,” Sam said smoothly, words slipping out like velvet. You could just see how your mother seemed to approve of him.

He placed his bag on the kitchen counter and seemed to look around for something, then his eyes traveled to you, a question within them. You tried to suppress a grin and shook your head, and Sam’s eyes traced back to your mom.

"Excuse me," Sam said, "Can I use the…?”

"Of course, dear." Your mother pointed down the hallway. "Second door on the right."

As soon as he disappeared from sight, your mother pulled you into a tight hug. "So spill, when did this happen? Didn’t you tell me you didn’t like that boy?”

“Just today,” you said with a small grin. “And perhaps I changed my mind. Try and date. Like someone kept nagging I should.”

“Finally,” your mom said, raising her palms in the air. “I have been praying you would go on a date, even if it was just once. You really need to get some experience. And Sam seems… nice.”

“I know,” you said, tongue pressing against the back of your teeth pensively. “He’s not my type…”

“I wasn’t going to say that,” your mother said hesitatingly, though you could tell she had been thinking it. Then she flashed you another smile and gently placed her hand on top of yours. “I am happy you are finally crawling out of your shell. You’re a pretty girl,” at this you scrunched your nose and she caught sight of it, “yes, you are. Even if you think differently.”

Then she let go of your hand and let out a happy sigh. “Oh, I remember when I was your age.”

You rolled your eyes as you both said, “Dated a new boy each week.”

You looked at your mom and you both laughed. “I know, mom,” you said. “I know. But I’m not like that.”

“I know,” she replied with a gentle smile, her head resting on her hands and her elbows leaning on the kitchen counter as she looked at you. “I'm so happy for you, sweetheart! He seems like a great guy."

You couldn't help but smile. "He really is, Mom."

Sam returned to the kitchen, a sheepish grin on his face, and you both settled down at the table to work on your homework assignment. Your mother, sensing that you two might want some time alone, gave you both a teasing smile.

"If you get hungry you may take from these,” she gestured at the food she’d been making. “I'll be working in the attic if you need anything," she said before exiting the kitchen.

Sam eyed the snacks your mother had been making and picked one up, taking a bite. You followed his example.

The assignment before you was boring, and quite soon both of you were sighing. You noticed how Sam was moving closer to you with every opportunity he got, brushing an arm against you or a leg. It was exactly why you had chosen to date him. You just knew he would make a move and never took schoolwork seriously. He was that type of guy. Hands-on. Thinking of one thing only.

"God, I hate this assignment," Sam mumbled as he flipped through his textbook, his green eyes filled with annoyance.

"Tell me about it," you agreed, rubbing your temples. "Let's take a break and put on some music."

"Great idea." Sam pulled out his phone and connected it to a small speaker. Soon, the sultry sounds of bachata filled the air, and you couldn't help but sway along to the rhythm.

"Come on," Sam stood up, offering you his hand. "Let's dance."

You grinned, taking his hand and allowing him to lead you into the dance. His strong arms guided you effortlessly, the heat between you two palpable as your bodies moved in sync. The world around you seemed to fade away as you lost yourself in the music and Sam's embrace.

The sound of a door slamming shut jolted you back to reality and you looked straight into the fury blue eyes of your father.

William Afton, your stepfather, stood in the doorway, his face twisted with anger. You immediately felt a knot of fear tighten in your stomach.

"Uh, hi Dad," you stammered, trying to sound casual even as your heart raced.

"Who is this?" he growled, his cold blue eyes narrowing as they fixed on Sam. Pretty young boy. Everything the opposite of what he was.

"Th-this is Sam," you replied, your voice trembling slightly. "He's my boyfriend." Not quite, but dating counted, right?

"Boyfriend?" William sneered, his distaste evident. "And that makes this okay? You think I'd let something like this happen under my roof?"

"Sir, we were just—" Sam began, only to be cut off by the sharp, icy glare William shot him.

"Enough," William snapped, his tone making it clear that there would be no further discussion. You could see Sam's jaw clench in frustration, but he wisely held his tongue.

You forced yourself to take a calming breath and lowered your gaze submissively. "I'm sorry, Dad," you murmured, hoping that would be enough to placate him for now.

William's lips curled into a sneer as he paced the room, his anger radiating in waves. "You're too young to be dating," he spat, his words like venom. "Don’t know what you’re getting into, do you? So eager for a boy’s cock."

You felt your cheeks flushed and shyly stared at the floor, letting your stepdad’s words wash over you like waves.

“And you,” he then said, aiming his fully attention at Sam now. “I know your type. Think you can seduce a naïve young girl, fuck her on your cock once and then throw her aside like a cheap whore. Laugh about it afterward with your friends. You think my daughter’s easy like that?”

Sam shifted uncomfortably under the weight of William's gaze, visibly shrinking back from him. You felt your cheeks burn with humiliation, wanting nothing more than to disappear.

"Maybe your mother thinks it's cute," William continued, turning back to you again, his voice dripping with disdain. "But I know better. She'd love to see you become a whore, wouldn't she?"

"Hey, that's not fair—" Sam started to protest, but a single raised hand from William silenced him.

"Enough." The word was barely more than a growl, and it sent shivers down your spine. You couldn't help but feel betrayed by Sam's inability to defend you, even as you knew that standing up to William was like trying to stop a hurricane with an umbrella.

"Look," Sam muttered, avoiding your eyes. "I should go. We can finish the homework later, or something."

And it was exactly this something that had the hope inside if your tummy plummeting. As Sam rushed to your front door, you followed him with featherlight steps.

Somehow this was what you had expected of him. All tough and popular in school, but when facing a bigger man he would shrink away.

It irked you that he didn’t even try to stand up for you, that he accepted this defeat without so much as turning to your dad and telling him off. Nope, he just went to the door. Left you to your dad. Coward.

You slammed your hand on the door before he could open it, forcing him to lock eyes with you.

"Wait," you whispered. "Why didn't you say anything? Why didn't you stand up for me?"

"Your dad,” Sam spoke through gritted teeth but hesitated, as if he were uncertain why he even had this conversation with you. At the end of the hallway, you could feel your stepdad’s towering presence, heavy and dark.

Like a shadow watching over the two of you.

“Your dad’s just...too much for me," Sam finally admitted, his voice tense. He paused and looked at you. "I'm sorry."

"Stepfather," you corrected him softly, feeling a strange mixture of relief and disappointment. "He's my stepfather."

Sam shrugged, his bag on his back, the zipper open still, showing the folders and maps you were supposed to be working on.

"Either way, I don't want to be around him." With that, Sam stepped out the door, leaving you alone to face the storm that was William Afton.

You slowly turned around, the shape of your stepfather like a dark shadow at the end of the hall. The displeased curve of his lips was visible from where you stood.

He only needed to point a finger to the floor, signaling that you had to return to him. No words were needed. Step after careful step, you walked closer, entering the room before he closed the door behind you.

“Well now,” the words came out low and rasped as your stepdad placed his large hand on the small of your back, guiding you back to the kitchen table before roughly pushing you toward it. You tumbled over by the sheer force, chest pressed against the cold wood as items that had still been on the table now clattered to the floor.

Strong hands moved past your hips, pulling your pants and panties down in one swift motion, exposing your neither regions. Cold air brushed past your skin and you subdued a shudder.

"You think it's okay to bring someone else home, hmm?" William asked, his voice cold. "Think I wouldn't find out?"

"Dad, I-" you began to protest, but he cut you off.

"Quiet." He didn't give you a chance to respond before he delivered the first spank, sharp and sudden. You gasped at the mix of pain and pleasure that shot through your body. His hands were big, even against the supple flesh of your ass.

"Count," he instructed, his breath heavy.

“One,” you said, words forced out through gritted teeth. Another slap, the stinging slightly fiercer than before. Your hands curled into fists in front of you, trying to support your weight on your elbows as you stood bent forward over the table. Another smack. “Two.”

You heard the deep breathing of your stepdad as it increased. He was getting excited. “You brat,” you heard him murmur in between slaps. The stinging increasingly becoming worse, the pain a delightful pleasure that made you hum.

“It’s clear Dad here has got to teach you a lesson not to be such a little slut,” each of those final words was punctuated by another firm slap to your buttocks, making you see stars and wheeze with pleasureful pain.

You whimpered out the numbers, bracing yourself for another smack. As the spanking continued, your cheeks burned and your arousal grew. There was something thrilling about being at his mercy, about submitting entirely to him.

Finally, your stepdad stopped, and you waited in anticipation for another slap. But it didn’t come. Instead, you felt his strong hands massaging your tender flesh. His fingers, rough from years of working on animatronics, sent shivers down your spine as he caressed your sensitive skin, separating your now sore cheeks and pushing them back together again.

"Such a pretty little thing, aren't you?" he purred, his hot breath fanning across your wet pussy. You could tell by the tone of his voice that he'd gotten exactly what he wanted, and it both terrified and excited you. He leaned down, his tongue teasing your slit before he captured your clit between his teeth, sending a jolt of pleasure through your body.

"Dad," you moaned, unable to contain yourself any longer. He hummed in response, his lips working expertly on your most sensitive spot. The nibbling the flick of his tongue to your sensitive clit, it was all too much, and you had to bite the back of your hand in order to keep from crying out loud. Suppose your mom would hear.

No, she could never find out!

Chapped lips curved against your sensitive sticky-wet skin. The little hairs of his beard tickled you as William continued to pleasure you with his mouth. You felt a familiar tension building within you. Desperate for release, you wriggled on the table, wishing you could somehow grasp his hair and urge him on. But he held your hips tightly in his hands, grip strong enough to create finger-shaped bruises, his head buried between your legs. All you could to was squirm against the table, wishing you could see him as he ate you out.

"Please," you begged, the sound nearly a sob. William chuckled darkly, slipping his fingers inside you and curling them just right. It was all too much – the pressure, the pleasure, the pain �� and suddenly, you were falling apart, your orgasm washing over you in a tidal wave of sensation.

Your body trembled, pussy pulsing wildly around his finger and tongue, slick gushing forward and into his awaiting mouth, coating his lips.

As he withdraw, you heard a dark chuckle. Your world spun and slowly got back into focus, and you realized you were still on the table, your weight resting on your elbows as you stared at the photographs of your family hanging on the wall.

You were grateful that the table supported you, because your legs were shaking and you didn’t think you could stand on your own right now.

"Good girl," William praised, his voice low and dangerous as he withdrew his fingers from your quivering core. As you lay there, catching your breath, you could feel the lingering pulse of your orgasm still radiating through your body. But William wasn't finished with you yet.

"Stay bent over," he commanded, his voice rough and demanding. You obeyed, anticipation causing a shiver to run down your spine. The sound of his zipper being undone filled the room, and you couldn't help but feel both nervous and excited for what was about to happen.

"Such a tight little pussy," he growled as he positioned himself behind you, one hand gripping your hip while the other tangled in your hair. He pulled you back, forcing you to arch your back even more as his cock pressed against your entrance.

"Please," you whimpered, desperate for him.

"Who do you belong to?" he asked, his voice dark and dangerous.

"Y-you," you stuttered, feeling your face flush with embarrassment.

"Say it," he demanded.

"I belong to you, Daddy."

"Good girl," he praised before thrusting into you without warning, his cock splitting you open and filling you completely. A gasp tore from your throat as you struggled to adjust to his size, but William didn't give you any time to recover. He set a brutal pace, pounding into you like an animal, his grip on your hair keeping you in place.

"Fuck, you're so perfect," he snarled, his breath hot on your neck. His words sent a shudder through you, and you couldn't help but push back against him, wanting to take him deeper.

"Harder, please," you begged, needing to feel his complete control.

"Greedy little thing," he chuckled, somehow managing to drive into you even harder. "You love this, don't you?"

You parted your lips to answer, the feelings overwhelming you. But he was quicker.

“Quiet,” he snarled in your ear, “We don’t want your mother to hear what we’re doing here, do we?”

Hard as it was, you managed a nod – even with the way he kept a grip tightly on your hair. Your body ached for him, and every thrust of his hips seemed to drive you further under his spell.

"Tell me who you're gonna fuck from now on," he demanded, his voice a low growl.

"Only you, Daddy."

"Damn right," he muttered as he continued to pound into you, each thrust making your body shudder with pleasure. You felt the firm outline of his hips, the softness of his belly pressing against your back as he thrust inside of you. It shouldn’t feel so sinful, but it did. Your much older stepfather was making you feel so good, that it dazed you.

You could feel another orgasm building, but before you could reach that peak, William's grip on your hair tightened as his own release approached.

"Fuck!" he snarled, his hips slamming into you one last time as he came, filling you with his hot seed. His grip changed on you while you cried out, walls fluttering around his hard shaft. His hand on your hip and the one pulling your hair ensured that you were pulled flushed against him, making sure he stayed buried deep inside for just a little longer than needed while your cunt pulsed around him.

Slowly, your vision started to stabilize again. The warped pictures on the wall came back into focus and your pussy’s grip on his cock became looser, not pulsing as frequently as your body started to relax.

His panting breaths filled the room as he slowly pulled out, releasing your hair from his grip.

“Now, what do you say?” you heard his low voice rumble as you slumped forward on the table, catching your breath.

"Thank you, Daddy," you murmured, feeling the slick escape from the depths of your core, sliding all the way down your legs. You slowly got up and pushed yourself away from the table, facing William.

He stood a few feet behind you, his pants resting on his hips, cock and balls proudly on display. Liquid coated his softening shaft, and you watched entranced as he started to tuck it back inside his pants before zipping his fly.

You followed his example, bending over to pull your pants up, wincing at the discomfort you felt deep inside your core where he had been battering your cervix without a care in the world. You prayed your mother wouldn’t walk in right now, but luckily, she didn’t.

When you were presentable enough again – making sure your hair wasn’t quite the mess and ignoring the cold sticky liquid that ran down the inside of your thigh – you took a step closer to your stepdad.

“Mr. Afton,” you said, knowing he liked it when you addressed him so formally. And it worked. You saw the spark in his blue eyes. Licking your lips, closed the distance between you, standing on your tiptoes to give him a gentle kiss.

Once the kiss broke, your eyes met his blue ones. The pupils so dilated they seemed almost black.

“That’s better,” your stepfather said, his hand resting on the small of your back, keeping you close to him whilst towering over you. Just the height of him made you feel small, but then there was that gaze and the firm tone he used when he spoke to you. So demanding, so in control.

"Remember," he warned, his eyes dark and intense. "I don’t ever want to see you take another boy home again, or the consequences will be far beyond anything you can ever imagine.”

As a spark lit off in your eyes, he caught sight of it and his grip on you tightened. The corners of his lips pulled into a tight line. “I am serious, do not challenge me on this one. It is unlike what you are thinking of.”

And somehow, those words brought with them a sense of danger that made you actually feel cold on the inside, like he wasn’t threatening to fuck you hard as a punishment, but that he was threatening whatever man you might want to take home in future times. Like a death sentence. Would he kill them?

“You're mine, and I don't share," he rasped.

You nodded, your heart racing at his possessiveness. Somehow, it felt both terrifying and thrilling to be so completely claimed by this dangerous, powerful man.

And as you looked into his eyes, you knew your plan had worked.

“I promise to be good for you, Dad,” you said, words a whisper.

He let go just in time before the door flung open and your mother entered the room.

“Ah, sweetheart, you’re back,” she said, bright smile on her face as she walked over to give William a hug and a kiss on his lips. His blue eyes darted past her to meet yours and you quickly glanced aside.

Once they broke apart, your mother turned toward you. “Where’s Sam?” And then a frown formed on her face as she sniffed the air. She must have been quick in recognizing the scent and deducing what must have happened, for you could see her lips curl into a small smile and her eyes twinkle,

“Well, at least I hope you’ve used protection,” she muttered as she brushed past you to return to the snacks she prepared earlier in the kitchen.

“Want a taste of something sweet,” she curiously asked your stepdad, holding up one of the plates with prepared snacks.

William’s grin widened. “Oh,” he murmured, “I think I already have.”

~ Fin ~

AN: I am open for prompts. Want to read more? Why not check my masterlist, I write a lot of reader-inserts, including x William Afton, Arthur Fleck, The Grabber, Arthur Harrow, Severus Snape, and many more. ~

Taglist: @likoplays @2pacl0ve

AN: For more, follow me (:

~~ Support me on Ko-Fi - Masterlist - Request Box ~~

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

This is complaining day because I realized there's more than one thing that got on my nerves lately and it's not just about the treatment of a kpop idol's mother. Let's begin.

Please, stop refering to Jungkook's mother as mama Jeon. I know the tendency is to ignore so many of the cultural differences that exist, but in SK, people don't change their surname after marriage. It just sounds idiotic and westernized in a ridiculous way.

So, Jungkook's mother loves all BTS members. She LOVES them all. How does army know that? How? I'm genuinely curious and genuinely asking. Because they say it as a certainty. Or, forgive me if my memory is faulty as well, but the only instance that we as outsiders were privy to in which we heard that woman speak for the first time, it was in early 2021 on another phonecall with Jungkook when she said I love you to Jimin.

Of course, the same ot7 narrative came as a buldozer at that time too. Damn, does that mean Jimin = BTS? Sometimes yes, but only when Army wants to diminish Jimin's importance and doesn't allow him to stand out individually too much. Musically or otherwise. But back to this Big Love that Jungkook's mom is supposedly feeling for everyone and which has been invoked once again when that woman mentioned Jimin twice while talking to Jungkook on the phone. Cause she already knew they were in Jeju. I bet she didn't have to find out randomly from a schedule group chat.

So what happens? An assumption is turned into certainty because of small people being extremely insecure. Because they see that one person is once again given more importance on a personal level and we can't have that. No sir! So in a panic, they tweet, they post on tumblr, tiktok, youtube the old age, boring af, sounding like a broken record sentence: "Mama Jeon loves all seven". Fuck me gently with a chainsaw cause that sounds a lot better than the feeling of throwing up I get whenever I read such things.

No, she doesn't love all of them. That is not a fact. It could be true and it's not impossible. But it is not a fact based on the knowledge we have at the moment.

Also, it shows once again that an entire fandom is actively creating a reality of their own which is not even like some sort of simulacrum of the reality they must live through. In Army world, the mother of one member of a k-pop group must love all the members of such group. It doesn't matter than irl, our mothers a lot of the times don't even like all our friends, besties or partners. We might have the most incredible connections and it would mean nothing to our mothers.

In that same vein, another narrative that makes me want to pull my eyes out is the "awww, their bond is to die for, they are (like) siblings after all". Do any of them never had any siblings? Never saw other people and their relationship with their siblings? Or with their family?

I also had to read (which was followed by me blocking it immediately) how Jimin and Jungkook's relationship is the sum of the other relationships they have with other BTS members. I mean, why would I have any sort of expectations from any of these people when they are completely incapable of looking at JM and JK as actual people. As persons with individual minds and an intellect of their own. Let alone the fact that their world does not stop with the presence of 5 other men. In what realistic scenario does this translate in real life? That's not how it works. Yes, we are social creatures and a product of our surroundings, but it is not in the way in which these stans believe it to be. They think that living in a dorm for a few years and working together with other people, it means that those experiences are the only ones that actually shape the personality of a person. They are real people, not fictional characters. I've never heard such ridiculous theories in my entire life, to be used as talking points about someone's behavior or relationship with another person.

Maybe the need to create this elaborate fantasy comes from the lack of love in their life, which then gets projected into this Disney, kumbaya, capitalist heaven narrative in which everyone is a big family and they love each other so much and equally and all the parents of all the children love every single member and thus, harmony is created. Love is always platonic and ever present. The complexity of human relationships must not exist.

[wachtelspinat]

i can't help but feel like my drawing days are kind of over. not entirely, i'll still be drawing from time to time. and deffo not because i want to. but i'm having this exact same feeling since mid 2022, since i was really struggling with my elective period, i kind of disconnected with art there and never truly found my way back. on top of everything that came after - moving, starting a job and working to be good at it which leaves such little room for other things because i can't handle my life well - there is just so much horrible shit going on. and i'm having a hard time comprehending it.

a part of me also feels very stupid for drawing one thing for almost 4 years now constantly, but another part of me knows "hey, but this makes you happy". it's a constant battle in my head because online spaces are like school grounds, and i don't actually wanna stand in the corner as that one kid that just can't shut up about that one character. but then again all i ever did was drawing fanart so... what does it. who gives a shit. be cringe and be free alright. but it kinda feels so hollow, esp. when you're at it for so long. a lot of mutuals move on. some are not even active anymore anywhere. and i wonder what happened. plus a huge chunk of the tone of the fandom has changed. also with the source material getting butchered so hard (since the release of ow2) it just kills the fun. playing this game used to be fun. playing this game was one thing that helped me getting through the last meters of university. it's like watching the downfall of the simpsons again without making the comparison too set in stone, just... this thing that used to be decent and nice and watching it getting ruined in real time (broken promises about pve, the recent gameplay changes?? the lore was fucked up from the start but they kind of tried, now it's just skins for 20+ dollars) while still having feelings for the characters is shit. anyway...

i recently went through a big folder of stuff i'd drawn at the age of 12-15 and there were so many fucked up but cool monster and cyborgs designs and just silly stupid stuff and all i could think of was that i felt so distanced from it, like i don't even know i think this is normal? because a lot of time has passed and a lot has happened and i knew i've drawn all this but i wasn't able to locate the person who did in my present me now and... it's just so normal that things move constantly forward but i feel like i missed huge chunks and passed a few stops and now i'm kind of lost.

i don't even know what i'm trying to say here anymore. i just feel sad because it feels like sth is slipping out of my grasp or sth has changed tremendously and i don't know how to make damage control.

i keep trying tho, i try to draw once a week at least. it's just like as soon as i take a step back and look at it i don't feel it at all. gonna continue tho, until it makes sense again i hope.

[rainbowsky]

Sorry I've taken so long to address this, I've had a very busy day and didn't have time to finish this post (which I started yesterday).

I'm talking, of course, about the incredibly controversial situation surrounding DD right now. I've gotten some messages about it so I figured I'd give my thoughts in a bigger post so that I don't have to keep repeating myself.

(CW: racism, spoilers FPU)

I know that by now most people are aware of the situation, but I'm going to start from square one for those who are just catching up on the topic.

There is a scene in Formed Police Unit where Chinese UN peacekeeping troops need to rescue a group of citizens who are surrounded by terrorists. In order to accomplish this they disguise themselves as people from the community. This being Africa, the troops were disguised using blackface.

Yes, I am saying that DD and his castmates appear in the film in blackface.

I am not going to post a picture of that here. It's just something I can't post on my blog. I understand that many of you will want to see for yourself so I'll link a clip of the scene, which was posted on Weibo. Please be aware before clicking - this is full-on blackface. Always take care of yourselves, and if you think it might be upsetting to you don't click. You don't need to see it to be a 'good fan'.

Background

For those who may not know, this movie was filmed years ago, in 2021. During those years I have seen many anti attacks against DD, claiming that he is racist and has worn blackface. Here's the photo that was circulating back then.

At the time I thought the makeup that he was wearing was likely anti-reflective black paint or camouflage paint such as is used by snipers (which he played in the film). I assumed that he was wearing his own hoodie over part of a military costume, because he was wearing a cammo shirt and what might have been combat trousers.

I was certainly not expecting full-on blackface from this movie.

There's no getting around it - this is extremely difficult to look at.

Blackface is widely viewed as offensive and racist. It shouldn't be hard to understand why. Putting on another person's ethnicity like a costume is deeply insensitive, particularly when you consider that BIPOC (black, indigenous, and other people of color) are so frequently targeted, exploited and marginalized. For those in positions of privilege and power to put on the appearance of the people who they oppress and exploit... it's just shocking and awful.

Blackface is most frequently talked about in an American context, but it's actually a problem globally - including in China. More on all that here.

The film

I have not actually seen the film, so I don't know much about the context beyond what is being discussed in the fandom. As I said earlier, in the film a group of UN police officers need to infiltrate an area in the community, and they take on disguises in order to do so.

In promotional media this film is being presented as based on true stories from real missions*. It seems the situation in question really happened on a Chinese peacekeeping mission, and the UN troops disguised themselves as black citizens in order to infiltrate and extract the endangered captives.

*I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt on this because it doesn't change how I feel it should have been handled.

This is important context that is being conveniently left out of much of the backlash about this situation. People are outright claiming that DD plays a black person in the movie - that he wore blackface to perform a role that a black actor could have played. This simply isn't true, and people making these claims are antis and liars. There's simply no excuse for not knowing the full context.

Having said that, I don't really think it matters how it ended up in the film. I do not think there is such a thing as a palatable or appropriate use of blackface. In this day and age it is nearly universally understood to be racist, and it's extremely controversial.

I can understand if they were trying to be accurate to the mission that they were portraying, but surely there are other ways they could have accomplished this scene (perhaps with the clothing but not the blackface). 'Historical accuracy' isn't as important as cultural sensitivity, not by any stretch of the imagination. In the interest of respecting audiences they could have adapted the scene to make the use of blackface unnecessary.

I really see no excuse for anything like this in 2024.

Audience reactions

Chinese sensibilities around these topics are very different from what we are used to in the West.

According to fan repos audiences initially didn't recognize any of the actors, and once it became apparent that they were in disguise, laughter erupted around the room. In fact, most fans are laughing a lot at the photos and video even on social media (although some Chinese netizens have been upset by it and have voiced complaints to various stakeholders).

It is also being widely discussed on Chinese social media as an exciting scene of heroism in the film.

I feel the need to point out that the laughter and mockery is a huge part of the harm, here. As if it's not bad enough that these actors are performing in blackface and presenting a perversion of black ethnicity, it also becomes an opportunity for audiences to mock and disrespect black people. It's become an opportunity for social media to be filled with racist jokes and mockery.

Roadshow statements

There have been some clips circulating of PR and roadshow moments with black cast members and some black audience members who have spoken up in support of the film and to thank the cast and crew for telling the story. Here's one example.

International fans have been dismissing those statements as ignorant or coerced, which I think is offensive and deeply fucked up. There's no planet on which I'm going to - with a totally straight face - say that a black person's response to the movie is not legitimate just because it doesn't comport with my own view.

This is a complex issue and there are inevitably going to be a lot of different perspectives. I hope people won't exacerbate the problem by supplanting black voices on this issue with their own, no matter what's being said. If there's any manipulation going on, let's assume it was in their choosing supportive black figures to speak for the film rather than claim that the black spokespeople are insincere.

China has a lot of issues with racism, there's no doubt about it. It's a huge part of why so many people try to whiten their skin, or why they mock each other when their skin gets tanned/darker. There is a lot of sinister, fucked up stuff going on in China around race - both in the country and in their dealings with other countries.

But we can't claim to speak for black people in China, particularly when they are speaking for themselves! I would hope this is extremely obvious!

Where's DD in all this?

It's understandable that bystanders will react to what they're seeing and might immediately deem it unacceptable - and DD along with it. Their reactions are valid, but as fans I hope that we can look at him with a bit more empathy. I hope that we can take a moment to try to see things from his perspective.

DD has been interested in and an avid fan of black culture since he was a small child. We've all seen how much he immerses himself in hip hop, street dance and the accompanying music and fashion. And yes, he's been accused of cultural appropriation in the past for wearing locs and durags.

However, I think fans need a bit of perspective here to get a sense of where DD might be coming from. Here's a guy who loves black culture, who has close friends who are black, who regularly works with black artists and who supports black artists, in a culture where racism against black people is prevalent and often extreme.

I think DD would probably be amazed to hear the accusations of racism against him. He likely has very few people in his orbit who are anywhere near as supportive of or as closely connected to black people as he is. He likely stands out in his circle as being particularly into black culture and connected with black artists, and probably regularly faces ignorant questions or digs from people around him about his close association with black artists and culture.

Not just because of racism alone, but also due to the racist parallels the government tends to draw between black culture, street dance, hip hop, etc. and criminality/moral degradation*. It's likely that ignorant people in his orbit have expressed concern or wariness toward him because of these associations.

*That is, until breakdancing became an Olympic sport, then they were suddenly onboard with some of it.

I'm not saying that he doesn't have a lot of learning to do (and if this situation becomes what I think it might become, he'll have a big opportunity to do so), I'm just saying that his ignorance isn't mean-spirited. He's coming at this from a totally different angle than any of us are, and he is immersed in a totally different cultural perspective than our own. In his world, his interest likely makes him a bit of an anomaly.

So those painting him as a horrible racist... it's just not how I see it.

The element of choice

I've heard many people say that DD 'didn't have any choice' about this role, that turning it down would not have been an option or that he would be under some kind of threat if he didn't take this role. I don't agree with that characterization of things. I don't think it's quite as 'gun to the head' as a lot of fans paint it.

I think it's more likely that he simply didn't realize that the role would involve blackface when he accepted it, or that he thought that blackface in this context - to infiltrate a terrorist cell and save civilians - would be fine. We don't need to depict China as forcibly compelling actors to take unwanted roles if we want to make sense of this. There are simpler, more logical explanations.

DD wouldn't have been the one deciding how to depict the scene - he didn't have that power in 2021 - but I also doubt he would have had a major problem with it given everything we know.

We must overcome our Western tendency to see things only from our own perspective. This has a totally different cultural context in China, and the voices we listen to about it should not be issuing exclusively from white faces that are not at ground zero of this situation.

Final thoughts

This film has had me worried from day one. I think most people have been expecting it to be full of offensive portrayals and propagandistic fuckery. There are so many ways in which a Chinese film about the UN is potentially a sticky, tricky mess. This blackface thing is likely just one problem on a towering pile of problems.

However, I'm not going to sugarcoat this - this has the potential to be a real shitshow for DD, and I am concerned. Especially if this film gets an international release.

We need to brace ourselves, because I don't think this is going to just disappear. DD has endorsements with international brands, and this could definitely cause backlash for those brands unless the issue is addressed and the scenes removed. There's no planet on which brands like Chanel and Lacoste can afford to have one of their spokespeople plastered everywhere in blackface.

If this film gets an international release and those scenes are left intact, it's possible he will lose some brands.

Let's hope it doesn't come to that, but let's face it - things like this have consequences, and that's why it's so important for producers and artists to be sensitive about what they're portraying.

While I think there's some endorsement risk here for DD, and the potential loss of some international fans, I want to be clear about one thing: I don't think this will threaten his career overall. In China this just isn't an issue in the way it is internationally.

I do hope the film team addresses this issue in some way, ideally by removing the scenes. They just finished doing a massive edit to remove ZZH from the film, surely they can handle something like this. But let's not hold our breath...

Everyone has the right to make up their minds about DD. As I've often said, being a turtle isn't for the faint of heart. That's not just because turtles are frequent targets for bullies, or because we have to constantly live with uncertainty and doubt.

Being an international turtle also isn't for the faint of heart because there are a lot of cultural and political minefields to navigate, and many ideological differences to adapt to. There's a huge learning curve and a lot of unknowns, and turtles who want to survive have to make peace with the fact that we and the boys are from different worlds in many ways. We may never know where they really stand on issues that are important to us.

However, in this case I feel confident that I know where DD's heart is on this issue. He simply doesn't hold hatred, disrespect or disdain for black people. Quite the contrary.

I think we'd all just feel a lot better if he had a good grasp on how to be a better ally.

And while we're waiting for that, I think we should put our money where our mouths are and learn more about these issues ourselves, both in China and locally at home. We want DD to be a better person; let's be better people too.

Edit: more on this here.

[parachutingkitten]

Just so everyone is aware, ayathefly, the account who claims to be a temp voice actress for Dragons Rising, is almost certainly my cyber stalker from last month.

She has almost the exact same story as one of the stalker accounts used to try and befriend me. Back then she was a 23yo temp voice actress named Maya who had a comedically whimsical story about her not knowing information about the ducktales reboot she was hired for. This time she's a 23yo temp voice actress named Aya who has a comedically whimsical story about not knowing information about the Ninjago reboot she was hired for. Both the accounts used generic profile pics from classic cartoons, reblogged posts of mine shortly after creating their account, and had this manner of speaking in their posts which immediately set off alarm bells in my head.

In case you are not privy to the saga, this person made a bunch of false accusations about me on one account while defending me on another in order to, I guess, try and win my favor. This after harassing, threatening, and otherwise pestering me on a number of spam accounts. This includes the full range of pretending to be a fan with a tragic story about a dead brother, to weird sex foot fetish fantasies. Since then I have received emails claiming to be showrunners interested in my feedback which I'm also certain are her.

I have also linked them back to the zanenindroid account, and the parachutingkitfanpage, both abandoned at this point, presumably because they didn't get traction.

I need you to understand I was on the fence about sharing this information. Even if they're making my life annoying, this person has at times claimed to be 16 in messages to me in the past (I figure it's possible that the 23yo thing might just be her pretending to be my same age) and I don't want to be the guy who calls out a kid who lied on the internet to try and get friends- even if what they're doing is ABSOLUTELY inexcusable, it's only really affecting me. I know how to use the block button. Turning off non-follow messaging and anon asks is annoying, but not that huge a deal if it means cutting off avenues for them to contact me.

But recently my MOTHER informed me that she got some strange messages from someone claiming to be a 23yo voice actress, and tried gaslighting her into believing she knew her mom from a writing group like 10 years ago (which is not possible btw), and should TOTALY introduce her to me, because we're the same age, and both interested in animation.

I can't not talk about this anymore. When you bring my family into this, you lose any attempt at mercy from me.

Especially given we have quite a few minors in the fandom, I feel obligated to say something. I would not feel comfortable with anyone I know or care about interacting with this person, regardless of how harmless this person thinks their intentions are. They have proved themselves to be a manipulative, lying, unhinged, and obsessive personality willing to put someone they presumably like through some of the scariest scenarios you can find yourself in on the internet- and then drag your family into it. I would ask that you do not interact, do not give them the time of day, do not try to reason with them, and try your best not to be fooled by new accounts that pop up a week from now with suspiciously similar behavior, because I'm almost certain that will happen if Aya goes silent.

Maybe you think I'm paranoid, and over blowing things, and that's your call to make, but I would not be making this post if I did not feel strongly about this.

Even if somehow this is not the same person, and I am falsely linking these two nearly identical identities, at the very least Aya is not who she proports to be. She claims to have provided temp voices for season 3 just this month (temp voices being temporary voice work done before the actual actors are able to record their lines), but Devon Mack (voice actor for Arin) has confirmed that he was in the middle of recording the official dialogue for season 3 back in January of this year. The idea that the production team would only just now be recording TEMP dialogue for animation that's going to release in just a few months is an absolutely WILD claim. I can not convey to you what an insanely truncated timeline that would be. I don't even think that Dragons Rising is a the kind of show to use temp dialogue, none the less have the budget and time to hire out if they did need temp voices, rather than just using production members like most temp work.

Please, be careful out there everyone.

I'm praying I never have to address this again.

[grison-in-space]

You know, I've been reading things written by people on the internet for my whole life, or at least my whole life after I was about ten. I'm thirty three now. That means there are people whose words I read on the internet twenty years ago who are presumably still around and occupying the internet—sometimes using names I can recognize from back then, too. (hat tip to my fellow "changing usernames is unnatural actually" brethren; I've only changed one myself twice in the whole world since I was about fourteen or fifteen.)

Sometimes I think about a person I see around occasionally on the internet. That person wrote a story about a character in a rather silly fandom we shared, and I read it as a child just beginning to conceptualize being someone whose opinions might matter. And I remember reading that story at some point, because at that age I had a hyperfixation on that character in that fandom at that time and I read pretty much everything in the genre. I never really got to talk to anyone but the inside of my head about it. My friends didn't read fanfiction, and my parents viewed my reading fanfiction as some kind of depraved, shameful secret. Anyway, I read that story and I remember having some kind of deep realization about how adult humans work while I was reading it.

I learned something about the world from that story. (It was one of those insights that are now so molten alongside my core that it's difficult for me to disentangle them from myself, like "people outside you have their own perspective on your behaviors, but that doesn't mean they have to be right.") And I remember that they know it, because they taught it to me, without meaning to. One of the anonymous impacts on readers that writers never see unless they're extraordinarily lucky.

And I smile, because it's lovely to see them again, and they showed me a skill I still use today. We don't have a relationship of any kind—it would be very difficult to recognize me, I think—but they did me a favor a long time ago. And I remember. Now I get to be reminded that this person still exists, and is still a pretty cool human to be around today, at least for the specific circumstance of internet neighbor. Well, and our modern level of concern about once beloved elders from the distant past going terrifyingly cult-addled and bigoted on short notice.

That has not happened in the slightest. They're just still a pretty nice fandom person who is a bit older than me, who is recognizably the same person they have always been, but more intensely and thoughtfully—like a distilled brandy, not a sour vinegar left out on a countertop too long.

Weirdly, that's a thing I find comforting: this tiny, one way, invisible affection. Every so often I feel this intense affection for a person I've never spoken to or about, because I see them and I love them intensely for a moment and then we both go about our days.

Think about how many interactions you have with people as you go about your day. Wouldn't it be nice to imagine that other people feel like that about you?

I think I'm going to imagine that there's one person that read something I said and thinks that about me. I don't need to ever actually know if it's true: I can just imagine someone who happened to be at a formative moment when they learned something against the background of my words. We'll never know each other as our screennames are lost along the years and we move in and out of touch with parts of ourselves, but we still have that little fond impact on one another, those fingerprints in one another's clay.

It's a nicer world to imagine than the one where no one is paying attention to me, or the only people paying attention to me are mean. And there's really no way to ever know for sure, so why not inhabit the pleasant end of the imaginatory pool if you can?

[marionluth]

I'm fairly new to the batman fandom, but today I was reminded of my favorite preteen batman animated series back in the early 2000s (damn I'm getting old 🫠) : Batman Beyond. And it got me thinking and I did some digging and found (fan-created) timelines about the ages of the characters.

So they theorize Bruce is 77 and Terry is 16 in Batman Beyond. Now I know that i’m mixing different media here (comics and DCAU), but if we go under the batman all media types umbrella, Bruce being 77 would make (again based on fan made ages analyses) Dick 62, Jason 57, Tim 55, Damian 49.

And I’m just think it would be interesting to explore these characters’ reactions to suddenly seeing a helluva young batman (at the same age they were still just Robins) roaming Gotham and kicking ass. And their enstranged toxic-as-fuck father figure bringing another teen into the bat-game AND giving that new kid the mantle (not that they'd want it for themselves, but I think it would still just rub them wrong?)

As I'm typing this I'm realizing there might actually already be numerous stories out there exploring this and I just haven't read any yet, but it just came to me and I thought it is an interesting premise to explore. Also trying to imagine all the Robins so old is 🤯

So yeah, if you happen to know of any fics like this I'd love some recs (I'll research for some myself later). And I really think that's something I might write myself at some point.

[hils79]

Hils Watches Tibetan Sea Flower - Ep 1

Yeah, sorry to The Spirealm but I've been very upfront about my intention to drop everything as soon as Tibetan Sea Flower came out.

I wasn't expecting it to drop overnight while I was asleep with zero warning but here we are. The DMBJ fandom is the embodiment of chaos and that extends to the way they release things too.

Also apologies to Choi San. I was going to gif you today but, well, see the above.

Apparently the official English title for this is Adventures Behind the Bronze Door but we've all been calling it Tibetan Sea Flower forever and that's also the title of the novella so I'm using that for my liveblogs. I'll use both titles in the tags.

Right, I've rambled enough. I'm going in.

Oh, god, I'm not ready.

Okay, first of all OMG LOOK AT HIS CUTE LITTLE FACE! But, also, I love that this flashback has him still looking older than he does in the retirement era movies

I mean he is not a skilled tomb raider, this is true. That doesn't stop him from trying though

Wait, that's the baby triangle! Are you telling me a 27 year old and a 44 year old are playing a character at the same age? I know I shouldn't expect logic from DMBJ but come on

Wait, is this a completely different actor? At first I thought they'd just used special effects to make Zhang Luyi look younger but I don't think that's actually him at all

Aww it's nice to see Wang Bowen back too. I do enjoy his Pangzi

Okay, but why is Young Pangzi being played by the same person who played retirement age Pangzi in the movies. MAKE IT MAKE SENSE!

I don't know who this is because the drama doesn't even had a MDL page yet but I like him. He's a good baby Wu Xie. Look at his little face when Pangzi says they need to go and see if Xiaoge is still alive or not

There's our special boy!

Starting with the whump early. Love to see it.

Only 20 mins into the first episode and Pangzi is crying because he thinks he found Xiaoge's body. I'm fine. This is fine.

FFS I know he's not dead and this is still devastating

Take a drink! It's the standard DMBJ hallucination!

Oh, not even that! It was all a dream!

Bleeding himself to lower his heart rate enough to fake being dead is definitely a very Xiaoge thing to do

I guess that's one way of describing what happened

Is he...using his architecture skills to map out the Zhang ancestral home that he went to? IS HE DOING ACTUAL ARCHITECTURE?

And wipe out an entire family so it was safe for Xiaoge when he got out, but we don't need to mention that small detail

I do like that this one shot shows you how obsessed and unhinged Wu Xie was during the time Xiaoge was gone

AH HAH! Now he's Zhang Luyi!

SURPRISE JI XIAOBING XIAO HUA????

A NEW XIUXIU??? Everything happens so much!

Baby, do you know what franchise you're in?

So weird seeing Xiaoge without his hood

Well, that was a lot. And I still have another 2 episodes to watch. Good thing it's a bank holiday here today

[idyllic-affections]

since you write for demon slayer i was wondering if you could write about the reader being tengen’s tsuguko and their mentor/mentee relationship (personally i think he’d be tough on them but care deep down. maybe touching on the entertainment district arc? thank you <3

being the sound hashira's tsuguko.

summary. what is it like being tengen uzui's student?

trigger & content warnings. mild depictions of injury, limb loss, voluntarily consuming poison, etc.

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. found family-ish, fluff, slight angst towards the end. tengen uzui (and his wives) & reader. 0.7k words. they/them pronouns for reader.

author's thoughts. i took this request and RAN with it, i love mentor/mentee requests for any fandom but especially for demon slayer.... the age was unspecified in this req, so i personally imaged tsuguko!reader being around tanjiro's age, however i left it pretty ambiguous so anyone can imagine it however they want. i also decided not to touch too deeply on the entertainment district arc, since this is only a headcanon post, but i'm totally cool with writing an actual fic about it! just shoot me another request if that's something you'd like to see <3

tengen is definitely a very tough mentor, and he doesn't get the opportunity to train many tsugukos because of this. he's hard on his students. he's a demanding mentor, though at the very least, he lays out his expectations clearly. he knows exactly what he wants he students to know.

the lower ranked demon slayers have favored hashira, ones they would prefer to train under if they were ever given the chance to. tengen is not really one of those favored potential mentors. preferred mentors would be people like kyojuro or mitsuri. that isn't to say any other hashira would be any less tough on their tsugukos than tengen is, but the sound hashira supposes those two come off as kinder than he does.

of course, it should be made very clear that he's hard on his students not because he gets some kind of sadistic pleasure out of watching them struggle, but because he wants them to survive.

his training is just downright difficult. it's all in the spirit of survival, though.

a tsuguko of his would have a lot of things expected of them.

his student is expected to build poison resistance by microdosing themselves day after day.

his student is expected to have a certain amount of stamina.

they're expected to be stealthy.

they're expected to be able to make split-second decisions.

simply put, it's... a lot.

generally, anyone who trains under him quits shortly after beginning, so they don't really get to know him. they don't get to understand why he does what he does. they miss the opportunity to really understand him. the one exception would be his current tsuguko, [name].

he cares very deeply for the one tsuguko that did stick around!

tbh, he's pretty open about that fact, especially when he's alone with them and his wives! he's not secretive about caring for them.

he expects them to prioritize their own life. it is something that other demon slayers might not agree with, something that others find "selfish" and "cruel."

tengen does not see it that way.

he's seen that self-sacrificial, "give everything up for the mission" ideology tear people apart. he's seen it tear his blood family apart. he'd be damned if he let it tear his chosen family apart.

"because you are very dear to me," he'd say, placing a firm hand on their head and ruffling their hair fondly, "i expect you to value your life above all others. the mission is not worth your life. you protect yourself, you protect others, and you get the hell out of there if you can't handle it. you come back to me, to us. you got that?"

i personally think he'd treat his tsuguko like his kid if they're sixteen or under. yeah, he's only in his early 20s. so what? that's his kid. if they're above that age, he treats them like a precious younger sibling. if they happen to be older than him? he does not care. that's still his younger sibling.

regardless of their age, his tsuguko is a part of his little family.

no demon will ever lay their hands on his family and get away with it. he will not allow it.

if they get injured on a mission and they're recovering at the butterfly estate, my man is at their bedside in an instant. he probably yells at them because how dare they worry him?? where did they get the audacity??? tengen eventually gets over it and admits that he's glad they're alright. his wives also come to visit them when they have the time!!

now, as for the entertainment district...

i think that mission would be very mentally taxing (and of course physically taxing, but let's focus more on the stress and panic for now).

seeing tengen lose his arm like that, thinking he was dead... god, it would terrify them. they have grown to see him as strong and infallible, so to see him so weak and broken would be genuinely horrifying.

they'd cry tbh

good luck to gyutaro, though. bro is at the mercy of their rage. having learned from tengen, i wholeheartedly believe that his tsuguko would be able to hold their own against the demon for at least a little bit. long enough for tengen to recover, long enough for everything to go according to plan.

but, of course... tengen does retire in the end.

well.

the whole point of having a tsuguko is to have someone reliable to succeed their respective mentor, right?

tengen loves his tsuguko.

he knows they're capable enough.

he wouldn't want anyone else taking his place <3

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

[olderthannetfic]

I don't get my fandom. They want more queer rep. The main cast is a bisexual femme woman with a preference for women, an aroace gender-indifferent AMAB man, a genderfluid all-pronouns using AMAB person with a beard who wears a dress, and a biromantic asexual bigender AMAB man who is agender + male. The supporting cast has a lesbian girl, a middle-aged ace het woman living semi-romantically with another woman who is the main cast's (emotional) adoptive mom, and a ambiguously queer character whose gender is never really confirmed or discussed.

A big criticism I also see is "the writing team is all cishet". One, we don't know that, someone could be closeted. Two, why is that a problem? I think it's great that they went, "this makes sense for who this character is. We don't have to force them to be cishetallo just because that's what you normally see in animation. Web animation can be different. This is who this person is and that's fine."

I'm 19. I talked to my half brother, who is 38, about this and he actually choked on his coffee. He said when he was my age, nothing like this was easily accessible for him. It would have been jaw-dropping representation for him. I asked about the writers being cishetallo and he said, "who fucking cares? I would've moved Heaven and Earth to see these characters hanging out and just fucking existing back then!"

I know you get a metric fuckton of asks, but I'd love to hear your take on this. You've been in the queer community way longer than I have (I've barely started interacting with queer people IRL; I grew up in rural Wyoming) and I do wonder what this debacle looks like to people in other age groups. I'd also be curious to know what older people would've thought if they'd seen this friend group in media when they were younger. I know it means a lot to me. But I feel like I don't get what it would have meant back then.

--

Well, written up like this, it might get an eye-roll for sounding like Captain Planet casting. (You know "One of A and one of B and one of C" in a way that feels kind of forced.)

But yes, I think most older queer people when looking at the actual canon would be like "Sweet! A cast full of queer characters!"

I grew up somewhere shockingly liberal for the 90s next door to some old, married lesbians (who still live there, as it happens). It still sucked for teenagers. I had an okay time, but I was always hearing about other teens having an awful time even as the adults in the same communities did okay. And that's a very, very good version of what it was like in the 90s.

I did have access to queer media, vastly more access than most teens had. It was still mostly art films, boring coming out memoir, and The Pain of Being a Minority serious literature. What I wanted was genre fiction with a romance b-plot between queer characters I found hot. There was a bit of that, but not much.

I don't know that I personally would have killed for the exact set of queer rep in a modern show, but that makes sense. There are plenty of identities that present about the same but where people have internal reasons for choosing one or another. There are different forces making one queer identity or another more embattled at a given point in time. So while broadly similar queer people have always existed, there actually are fads in identity to an extent. (This is different from "wharrgarbl, the blue hairs with their pronouns!!!", which is just people being ahistorical assholes.) Modern media does and should reflect these differences. It might be for me, but it's going to be for 40-something me, not teenage me if it's coming out right now. If it's for current teens, it's not for teen me.

But yeah, in a general sense, I agree with your brother: "Damn, we have so much today! That's cool!"

The kvetching is usually people being angry that it's not representing their exact slice of queerness instead of someone else's. Or, let's be honest, a lot of it is "You didn't make my ship happen! How dare?!" dressed up as activism.

...

One thing I will say is that teenagers were extremely dramatic in my day too, and black-and-white thinking was just as common. Looking a gift horse in the mouth is not new. Yes, your fandom is full of idiots, but I wouldn't read too much into it.

[cantcompetewhereudontcompare]

DECONSTRUCTING FANDOM MYTHS: "Harry Styles got to where he is because he was pushed by the label"

In light of Liam Payne's passing, certain middle-aged bloggers who have come back with a vengeance to spew lies all over the fandom (lies that get repeated and permeate the opinion of every chronically online fan that's adjacent to any degree to the 1D fandom or its solo artists), so I decided to deconstruct those lies. One by one.

This will be a series of separate posts analyzing it in detail.

"Harry Styles got to where he is because he was pushed by the label"

Absolutely not, not even CLOSE to the truth. I know people are aware, tangentially, of what Liam said in Logan Paul's podcast. Impaulsive, a couple of years ago. Clips of that went viral and he got a lot of hate for it. But actually go and watch it. I cued the relevant bit in the link, so you won't have to watch any unnecessary part.

In the podcast Liam says that he went from 180,000 people who auditioned down to the last 24. For the uninitiated, The X Factor was the most popular show on TV around that time and SO many people auditioned. I'll explain the process of the show briefly because it'll also be relevant later in this post.

You first send a tape in, and then you get a callback to audition in front of producers (this was in March-April). If you go through, you go to the live auditions which in 2010 happened in six cities (Glasgow, Birmingham, London, Dublin, Cardiff, and Manchester). Liam did Birmingham, Niall did Dublin, Harry, Louis, and Zayn did Manchester. 211 acts made it through after live auditions in 2010, to the next stage which was bootcamp.

Bootcamp lasted 5 days. On the second day, about half the acts were dismissed, leaving 108 standing, which were divided in four categories. Boys, Girls (these two were ages 16-27), Groups, and over 28s. There were four judges and each judge "mentored" a different category. Because of the format of the show, each category has to have an even amount of contestants (in 2010 it was 8 acts per category). The "Boys" category was very full, so they dismissed the 1D guys unless they agreed to form a group. They did, so they then went to the next stage, which was Judges' Houses. Simon was mentoring Groups that year, so 1D went to "his" house in Spain alongside the 7 other Groups. The goal of this stage is cutting the acts to 4. Only 12 acts make it to the Live Shows.

1D passed Judges' Houses and went on to the Live Shows, there were 10 Live Shows in total, with the last one being the Final. 1D made it to the Final and came in third (the winner was Matt Cardle, runner-up Rebecca Ferguson).

Anyway, as I was saying, in 2008 Liam made it to Judges' Houses, and since Simon was mentoring Boys that year, he was his mentor. He didn't make it to the final 4 acts, and was instead cut off. In the podcast, Liam says that after being cut off, Simon had dinner with him, his mom, and one of the X Factor producers, who would later become a 1D manager, and told him that he wanted to put him through but that he was too young and needed to get his education in.

Another small tangent, education in the UK goes Primary School (until age 11), secondary school (until age 16), and then two years of what's called Sixth Form (also known as college, also known as A Levels). These last two years weren't mandatory if you weren't going to university back then. Liam was 14 in 2008, so if he waited two years, he would finish secondary school. The X Factor actually lifted the age limit to 16 after this. Harry has said that he always wanted to audition to the X Factor but he was always too young (remember, he's 6 months younger than Liam so he didn't make the age cut-off in 2008, and then they lifted it even higher). And I'm adding this here because it drives me nuts, Harry DID FINISH HIGH SCHOOL. He took his GCSEs which are the exam you take to finish high school. He just didn't do those extra two years of college (none of them did, btw, Louis did first year twice because he failed it the first time, but he didn't finish either).

Anyway, so Liam has dinner with Simon, where Simon essentially tells him "you have what it takes but I'm not taking you out of school. Come back when you finish." And Liam does just that. Not only that, but he (and I'm quoting here) "sings everywhere he can." He sings for money, he takes vocal lessons. He sings at old people's homes, at his local soccer stadium in Wolverhampton (which is not a small deal, btw), he sings in pubs. He literally talks about being paid a lot for performing at times "more money than I'd ever seen."

I think a lot of people don't know this. A lot of people have no idea that Liam WAS actually a professional singer BEFORE 1D. And he's not lying, he's not exaggerating, he's not gloating in this part of the interview. It's 100% true.

Then Liam says that because of the promise Simon had made him, he worked around Liam's face to create a group. I know we've all seen the footage of Nicole Scherzinger putting 1D together through their headshots. I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but the X Factor is highly staged. They didn't decide to put the band together in front of the cameras on the fly. Simon has been trying to recreate that ever since, and he's put several groups together in similar circumstances since then (Little Mix and Fifth Harmony are successful tries at it).

These boys had been auditioning since March, as I said. In fact, Liam says in the podcast that "it's pretty obvious who's gonna make it through because cameras start following them around." Remember, Zayn had the whole "where is Zayn" saga, and Harry had that segment "playing" all the female contestants. (Don't get me started on how disgusting that was, considering he was 16, but oh well). Both of these things happened in bootcamp. Why? Because the producers saw something in Harry and Zayn and knew it'd probably pay off to have footage focused solely on them. I'm not claiming it's all a big conspiracy, but clearly they saw value in them.

Liam didn't claim that he was the only reason the group got put together, but he was one of the reasons, and I think he's 100% correct.

With the fact that he was auditioning for a second time, once the show started airing, he created his own little niche fanbase.

He had a website where he sold signed wristbands.

And even had a name for his fanbase:

He'd gone to talk shows YEARS before 1D was formed. This is him on Lorraine in 2008. The video itself was uploaded BEFORE he first even auditioned for the X Factor for the second time.

Here's the actual video:

And now I'm going to show you, factually, how Liam was who the producers of the show thought would be the main guy and who was ACTUALLY pushed to the front.

This was their entrance for their first ever performance at the X Factor live shows

This is how they were standing while waiting for feedback from the judges. Liam tended to be in the middle or in the front in most photos and interviews. None of this is accidental, btw, blocking in TV is a serious matter, whoever is at the center is who your eyes will be drawn to.

It doesn't matter how many times The Hags try to rewrite history and claim that Harry was "pushed to the front," nothing they say, no matter how many times they repeat it, can change history and what we can see with our own eyes.

That doesn't mean that they would blindly push Liam no matter what. They would course-correct if someone else started to give signs of testing better. They, in fact, did just that.

Keep in mind, back in 2010, social media was in its infancy. Instagram had just been created (and it only became a thing since 2012), Facebook was huge but it was very personal and none of the guys really used it much.

Twitter had started to become relevant in 2009, and most young people were flocking there. Justin Bieber and One Direction fans were the backbone of what's today known as "stan Twitter."

What I'll do is analyze Liam and Harry's popularity on Twitter going by the air date of their X Factor episodes, which you can find in the picture below.

Liam's audition aired September 4 (auditions 3) and Harry's audition aired September 18 (auditions 5)

I'd love to do a proper breakdown of their follower counts but that's not really possible because there isn't an archive that can tell you that accurately. We'll have to rely on their own tweets and tweets from fans.

I'll also analyze their performances, the solos they got, how blocking was handled, etc. There was extra content where 1D was featured, and I'll address that as well, but keep in mind the extra content was only seen by a handful of people relative to the amount that watched the live shows - you can see the ratings above. We're talking 13 million viewers on average.

Neither Harry nor Liam would be featured on the X Factor again after their auditions until bootcamp aired. As you can see above that was September 25/26. There were glimpses of them the 25th (like the ones I mentioned before about Zayn dancing and Harry dating), but the main thing was the 26th when they were cut from the show only to be brought back and put in the band.

Liam had nearly 7,000 followers on September 15 2010 (10 before bootcamp).

Meanwhile Harry had 2,800 September 26, right before the episode aired:

The next day, after the episode aired, Harry nearly doubled his followers.

And so did Liam by September 30, with 14,000

Judge's Houses was when 1D was first introduced as such and they performed Torn. This aired October 2/3. I don't have data for these days.

Something must've happened October 6 (I'm thinking maybe a Twitcam?) because we have the first archived version of their accounts and we can actually see their followers.

Liam had almost 24,000 and Harry had almost 19,000

Liam still had an edge but Harry was rapidly approaching. Liam went from tripling Harry's followers, to doubling them, to only being a few thousand above.

Here we have the airing schedule for the next couple of shows.

1- First live show, October 9/10: They performed Viva La Vida.

Liam opened and closed the song, Zayn and Niall had short-ish solos. Harry and Louis had none. I posted pics of how they were standing above, but Liam was blocked in the middle the whole time.

2- Second live show, October 16/17: They performed My Life Would Suck Without You.

Liam opened the song and had a second solo in the second verse. Other than a single adlib by Zayn of two words mid-song, only Liam had solos. Liam was also blocked in the middle and close up for most of the song. (You can fact-check, just watch the video). At this point it's pretty clear Liam is the one being pushed. The others are barely singing. In both performances so far Liam has giant close ups that last a very long (for TV) time.

3- Third live show, October 23/24: They performed Nobody Knows

Liam opens the song and sings for quite a bit, Harry gets his first solo, performing the bridge. They're static the entire performance, with Liam blocked in the middle.

Before every performances they showed a short interview about their week, and this week they showed footage of and talked about going to the mall and how that caused hysteria with fans. After the performances was over, Dermot O'Leary, the host of the show, asked them who had to sign the most autographs. They all said Harry. Keep in mind, at this point (when the whole autograph thing happened), this boy has had NO SOLOS in the live shows. Just that one performance of Torn and his audition.

I'll now address the part about the other bits of footage they showed aside from the main performances. They had bits and pieces in a show called XTra Factor, Megamind, Question time, etc. You can find a full playlist of 1D's appearances in these videos here. That, and the video diaries, of course were the only pieces of content the X Factor made about them. These were fluff pieces that either aired during the week or after the live shows, or were internet exclusive, so like I said, the audience that consumed this was pretty small in comparison to the live shows and as such it doesn't really warrant an analysis. That said, all the members were featured pretty evenly on these, with Louis perhaps being the main one because he was very loud and energetic.

I think these videos were fundamental to establish a fandom, but I wouldn't say it really affected who was popular. Louis was by far the least popular member while they were in X Factor (this is a fact, not me being shady, and this would of course change while they were in the band), even though he was the one who was probably featured the most in this content (he was also pretty much always front and center in the video diaries, for example).

Aside from that, there was social media, where all five did Twitcams and tweeted fans and stuff. Liam was the most active on Twitter and it was an inside joke both in the fandom and with the guys that Liam was always doing a Twitcam.

We're in late October and so far, Harry has not been pushed at all. I think we can all agree on that. And yet, by the 26th, he was the most followed member, juuuust edging Liam

You can see how Niall and Zayn have about half the followers Harry and Liam have and how Louis is trailing all five.

4- Fourth live show, October 30/31: They performed Total Eclipse of the Heart

Niall and Liam did a call and response bit where Niall would say "Turn around" and Liam respond with the rest of the verse. Louis and Zayn had small solos. Harry had no solos, being the only one not to have any. Just saying. No solos. They start the performance sitting down. When they stand up Harry is blocked in the middle, but they switch when the song ends with Niall ending up in the middle.

5- Fifth live show, November 6/7: They performed Kids In America

Liam started the song, again. Niall had a small solo and so did Louis. Harry and Zayn did a bit where they harmonized together. Harry had one (1) solo adlib. He was blocked in the middle the whole performance, to be fair, first time this has happened so far. I can sense the air shifting but still very short solo time.

6- Sixth live show, November 13/14: They performed Something About The Way You Look Tonight

Liam starts again, Zayn has a few small adlibs. Harry has an actual big solo (and he knocks it out of the park). He's also blocked in the middle again. We're 2/3 of the way through the season and more than halfway through the live shows, btw. The X Factor started airing August 21st and finished almost exactly a month after this performance on December 12. It's clear the producers are starting to notice just how popular Harry has become and they're shifting the focus in front of our eyes. When Harry starts singing the audience SCREAMS (jump to 0:40 seconds in the video).

7- Seventh live show, November 20/21: They performed All You Need Is Love

Liam starts once again. Harry is now permanently blocked in the middle, it seems, and he has a solo following Liam. Niall has a solo after the chorus, Harry takes the solo after Niall as well, he also closes out the song with a call and response, where he sings "Love is all you need" and the rest chorus "love, love, love." The shift is in full swing. Liam is still opening, but only because he sets the tone now, and seemingly not because he's the de facto leader anymore.

8- Eighth live show, November 27/28: They performed Summer of 69 and You Are So Beautiful (other contestants were being eliminated so now the ones remaining are singing two songs).

Summer of 69: Liam starts, and he's the only one to have a full solo, the rest of the song is mostly all five with Harry doing a couple of adlibs. Zayn is blocked in the middle at first, but Harry ends up in that position when the song ends.

You Are So Beautiful: Liam starts. Harry takes the solo after. He's blocked in the middle again. Zayn has a solo after, then it goes back to Harry (complete with a high note), and he ends the song. I don't think Niall and Louis opened their mouths.

We can now update on followers, because I can finally find some more data.

December 2, Harry has 118,000 followers

December 3, Liam has 101,000

The shift has shifted, fully. Sorry, Liam, you had a good run.

Jokes aside, Harry forced their hand. He became the most popular one with little to no solos, while someone else was supposed to be the focus. He wasn't the focus of the extra content (that would be Louis) and he wasn't the most active one on social media (that would be Liam). It just HAPPENED. 100% organically.

Yes, of fucking COURSE once they saw the raw attraction this boy generated in hordes of girls they switched gears. DUH. Wouldn't you??? They don't make these decisions based on nothing. If the audience wants Harry Styles they'll give them Harry Styles. That is how it works.

9- Ninth live show, December 4/5: They performed Only Girl in the World and Chasing Cars

Only Girl: Liam started, Zayn had a small adlib, the rest of the song is all five. They moved around the stage a lot, so the formation doesn't really matter all that much.

Chasing Cars: Liam starts and he's blocked in the middle at first. They switch after the first chorus and Harry blocks in the middle as he takes his solo in the second verse. He's also doing high harmonies so you hear his voice the most throughout the entire second chorus very very loud while the others blend together. This is the first time that happens so clearly. He also closes the song. This is their last performance before the final, and it'll echo the way most One Direction songs will go for their entire discography.

I have to say, the audience gets loud before and after every performance, and every time they switch solos too. The audience adores all of them. But they get SO loud when Harry starts a solo. I'd watched all of these years and years ago but had forgotten that detail.

Also, the myth that Harry wasn't as good as Liam and Zayn at this point is just preposterous watching these performances. His voice is so solid when he has to sing. Liam is obviously more steady (literal years of experience vs a couple of weeks), but he's not better than Harry by any means, just better equipped, I'd say. Zayn's voice is very thin and way more off pitch than I remembered (Harry can get flat as well, but he belts with a lot of power while Zayn at this point cannot, probably nerves tho).

Anyway, the X Factor final would air December 11/12. Obviously it aired at night, so the next two tweets are right before the final.

Liam gained 3,000 in about a week.

Harry had gained 20,000.

And if you've watched all the videos I linked, you'll know exactly why.

I don't really have more insight on their followers in 2010. I can't find any other tweets that mention numbers. But for the sake of completion, let's analyze the final two performances.

10- Final, December 11/12: They performed Your Song and She's The One.

Your Song: Liam started. They were blocked with separate spotlights but when they formed in line, Harry was blocked in the middle, and immediately started his solo. The bit about Harry doing high harmonies for the second chorus happens again. This time Liam closes the song.

She's The One: Liam starts. Harry is blocked in the middle yet again (it's so funny lol). He takes the second solo. Louis introduces Robbie Williams after Harry's solo, who stands right next to Harry and takes the next solo (and all the solos after this). Robbie hugs Harry for most of the performance, then Louis who's on his other side. The camera is solely focused on Robbie with a little bit of Harry, which I find fucking HILARIOUS. What incredible foreshadowing.

*

Anyway, was Harry PUSHED by "The Powers That Be"? I mean, sure, but only after they realized how insanely popular he was. They stubbornly tried to push someone else to the forefront for two thirds of the competition and only clued in towards the end.

More so, when they gave in and started to push Harry, it actually worked. 1D became massively popular with hordes of fans, and most of them latched onto Harry. It's not like they switched gears, pushed Harry after Liam, it also flopped and someone else was more popular, but they stubbornly decided to continue pushing Harry. If it happened with Liam, it could've easily happened with Harry. But it didn't.

What you need to understand is that you can push whatever you want to an audience, but just because you push it doesn't mean it's gonna work out. Some things and some people click and others do not. Marketing can only help so far. And these decisions aren't made lightly. There's a ton of market research, of analyzing data, and checking reactions. If Harry hadn't tested well once they shifted, they wouldn't have kept pushing just for the sake of it. Just like they didn't with Liam.

Things don't happen in a vacuum. Harry didn't have any industry connections to warrant a push from the start (that would be Louis, who's mom knew James Corden). He hadn't been on TV or taken vocal lessons (that would be Liam). He also had never taken musical lessons for any instrument (that would be Niall). His family was working class. His mom has recently talked about how many jobs she had when he was growing up and how exhausted she was. Gemma talked about her and Harry being latchkey kids, having to fend for themselves. We know Harry worked multiple jobs since he was a child and until he was put in the band (since he was like, 10). He'd never gone to London before X Factor.

When The Hags claim that he was "chosen" and "pushed" they never explain the why in detail. Because THEY CAN'T. Not without admitting that Harry is talented and charismatic. I've seen some say "people like him because he's attractive." I mean, of course, he is. He's very attractive. So are the others, though? Different levels of attractiveness, of course, but they all got put in that band because of their looks. If they could sing but looked fugly they wouldn't have been put in a BOYBAND. In fact, I think being cute was more important than being able to sing at the time. Not naming names, but...

There's also been claims of "well, he was probably easy to manipulat." Brother ALL OF THEM were easy to manipulate. They were working class kids with a dream. I know part of being The Hags is having a bitch eating crackers attitude to him breathing, so of course they're never going to admit that he's not just good looking, but he's also charismatic, and has a great stage presence, and has a beautiful tone of voice, and an incredible work ethic.

But most importantly he had that Thing that people just latch onto. It's not something tangible you can describe. He just has it. It's the reason The Hags have been foaming at the mouth for a decade. There was nothing extraordinary about him that would producers want to push him above the others nefariously. The reasons you want to push an artist are typically very benign because that's the nature of the beast.

He didn't get an unfair advantage among his band mates.

Someone was ALWAYS gonna be in the forefront. Every single band in the history of bands has had at least one front-person. The producers initially thought it'd be Liam, put him in that position, but Harry took that from him organically, as much as it pains The Hags.

Fast forward to right before 1D released their first single (What Makes You Beautiful, which came out August 19 2011), and Harry now has 120,000 more followers than Liam (25% more). Louis Niall and Zayn are all pretty close together in followers, about 30,000 behind Liam and 150,000 behind Harry.

Now fast forward to around the time of their debut album release (mid November 2011)

The difference has now stretched to >200,000 (cannot get this tweet to embed but it says Liam is almost at 800,000).

This distance will grow bigger and bigger until the end of 1D and the start of their solo careers. By the end, Niall had solidified himself as the second most popular 1D member. These were the numbers on January 2016 (after 1D ended but before Zayn started his solo career):

Yes, once Harry became the frontman, he became THE FRONT MAN. In their first single, he sings the bridge and sings directly to the girl in the music video.

We also know Harry was BY FAR the most prominent voice in the group.

I haven't independently verified these screenshots, but I've been seeing them make the rounds on Twitter for ages with no one fact checking them, plus they... well, they sound about right. If there's anything that's wrong about them, please let me know, but counting these numbers sounds like an absolute nightmare that I'm simply not willing to put myself through.

This is counting ALL the albums, of course, but we know Harry consistently had the most amount of solos throughout their discography.

He also lead most choruses by far

And while for the first two albums Liam would start basically every song, Harry would quickly catch up with the latter three

And I was actually able to independently verify this (because it's not that hard), and the numbers aren't exactly the same but they're very similar. Somehow I have more songs? Maybe whoever did this only used the standard versions of the albums.

These are the totals: Liam 36, Harry 31, Niall 11, Zayn 9, Louis 4.

When they did interviews Harry was almost always sitting right next to the host (this would depend on what was the best spot for blocking in terms of the cameras and lights the show would use, but typically it's next to the host)

He was typically in the middle or in whatever place gave him more attention in photo shoots and he was, for instance in the thumbnail of most music videos, a lot of the times alone

Anyway, what's the point of this? The point of this is that my mama didn't raise a liar. Harry WAS pushed to the front once he became the most popular one... in the middle of the X Factor. And because he was pushed to the front a vicious circle (I'd describe it as virtuous, to be perfectly honest) was created, where more people heard his name, and he became even more popular, so he was pushed more. And so forth.

The media picked up on this, of course. It very quickly became "Harry Styles and his Directions."

Harry was very gracious about it, and we'll touch on his attitude towards that and his potential solo career in a post soon, but rumors of him going solo started almost as soon as they became huge.

1D released their first single in August 2011 and their first album in November. Neither of these would be released in America until 2012 (January for WMYB and March for UAN), once they did, 1D became massive worldwide. Harry started dating Taylor Swift towards the end of 2012, and that gave him a surplus of name recognition. He was already the most popular one by far, as we've established, but dating America's Sweetheart only created more distance between his celebrity ant he other four.

Thing is, he didn't date Taylor Swift for this reason. I know The Hags tend to be conspiracy theorists (or former conspiracy theorists that never lost their ways), so they will absolutely tell you it was PR to further his career, but I PROMISE you, it wasn't. This is something that can be very easily verified by virtue of just... paying attention to Harry and Taylor's relationship a little closer than the average tinhat tends to.

I'll clarify that I'm not fond of Taylor Swift. I flat out don't like her. I don't like her and Harry together either. But I don't just believe in things I personally enjoy. I believe in REALITY. One day I'll make a breakdown post of their relationship (which has been overly romanticized and minimized in very similar amounts). But the point I'm making right now is: yes, she raised his celebrity, but no it wasn't PR. In fact, the audience was aware of them being a couple for like, two months, when they had something going on, on and off, for several years (mostly off, let's be real).

After Harry was linked to Taylor, the talk about him going solo hit mainstream media. I mean, even before he was linked to Taylor the media discussed it.

May 2012

These reports come from The Daily Star, which is National Enquirer levels of BS, of course. Harry once sued them for alleging on their cover that he had leaked nudes and posting a manipulated picture of his "naked" body (it was photoshop). But still, why did they make this rumor in particular up? Well, because he was the most high profile member, even in May 2012.

The reports kept coming, April 2013.

Harry Styles Going Solo?! One Direction Rep Says There's "No Truth" to False Album Reports. Source

The source for this one is The Mirror, which is slightly less terrible than Daily Star, but still quite terrible. The Sun would've been their go-to publication if this was something that had any type of substance (The Sun is also quite terrible, but they did have a lot of ties to 1D's team, particularly their publicist). Of course, 1D's team shut the rumor down immediately. They did this over and over. I'm not going to show you every instance. There were even leaked emails where it was asked that Harry did events on his own and Sony politely informed them that, no, Harry didn't do events on his own without the rest of the band.

The song Don't Let Me Go leaked in June 2013, and of course people jumped.

Truth is they all recorded versions of the songs individually. This is something Louis touched on, I think in his documentary? Harry wrote Don't Let Me go, and he recorded a demo of it, because they all did that. The song was for the band, not for himself.

In terms of writing, that's another topic I'll expand on later, but while they were all slowly dipping their toes into songwriting, Harry seemed to want to branch out. 1D had been assigned a team of writers and producers spearheaded by the super talented and successful Savan Kotecha, who was their coach in the X Factor (he's an Oscar shortlisted and Golden Globe and Grammy nominated songwriter behind a huge amount of enormous hits (Can't Feel My Face, God Is A Woman, Love Me Like You Do, DJ Got Us Falling In Love, etc).

He quit after 1D's second album, after being harassed by Louis (I will absolutely expand on this some day), but he maintained a good relationship with the others. When he left, he recommended a set of songwriters and producers to take over his place for the three following albums, this time spearheaded by Julian Bunetta (also very accomplished, but, yeah, slightly less so than Savan).

While Harry did write a few songs with both of those teams (he actually wrote Happily with Savan for 1D's third album, the last song Savan wrote for 1D before leaving). He also sought out other songwriters.

You can find a complete breakdown here, but while still in 1D Harry wrote with the likes of John Legend, Gary Lightbody and Johnny McDaid (Snow Patrol), Dan Layus (Agustana), Jake Gosling and Chris Leonard, Gavin DeGraw, Ryan Tedder, Johan Carlsson, the band Kodaline, Taylor Swift, Bruno Mars, Max Martin, et al.

Harry started writing songs he kept for himself in 2014 (he mentioned this about his song Two Ghosts, which he later released in his debut album, for instance). And he also wrote songs for other artists, such as Ariana Grande, Alex & Sierra, and Michael Bublé.

Of course, this branching out got him a ton of connections and a ton of grace from members of the industry (who have always spoken wonders about him). He mentioned meeting his current manager and longtime friend Jeff Azoff in Toronto in 2012. Obviously The Hags get bent out of shape about this, because Jeff is son of legendary music manager Irving Azoff.

But Harry's connection to Irving is completely irrelevant in terms of his popularity. As I established here pretty plainly, he became the most popular member in 2010. Their team had to visibly pivot from promoting Liam Payne as the de facto leader to promoting Harry. People latched onto him organically.

Yes, when you have that once in a lifetime reaction from the audience to an artist, different types of music people with high positions of power will take notice and want an in for themselves. We'll get more in depth about this in the next post, so I don't want to continue to waffle on a lot longer, I think this whole "Harry was only popular because he was pushed" thing has been thoroughly debunked.

He was pushed because people CHOSE HIM.

And it was a good decision to do that because he was a huge part of 1D being successful. People try to humble him so often, "he wouldn't be famous if it wasn't for 1D."

You don't know that. Justin Bieber was discovered on YouTube in 2009. Harry was in a band in high school. He did musicals in school. He loved doing karaoke and was an avid music enjoyer. He was very much musically inclined and could have very well become famous without 1D. He could've auditioned for the X Factor again at a later date. He was SIXTEEN when he was put in the band.

It is not a fact that Harry wouldn't have become famous without 1D. He could've. But we also know that the minute Harry said he wouldn't sign his contract again, the band disbanded (and that's the subject of the new post).

Harry could and has thrived without 1D. But One Direction has never thrived without Harry. So.

[ironboyxs]

Unseen Hearts

Fandom: Stray Kids

Pairing: Felix x Male Reader

Word Count: 4652

Summary: Y/N is a young actor and singer on the rise who has great admiration for Stray Kids, especially a certain member with a huskier voice.

p.s. this is the first time I write about kpop on this blog, I hope you like it! In fact, I was extremely inspired because I've never written so much! and another thing: I mention a Korean ideogram in the story, I tried to do my research but my Korean is terrible, forgive any mistakes. and always remembering REQUESTS ARE OPEN, in the pinned there are the fandons for which I write

You never thought you would be in a serious relationship with a K-pop artist. Of course, you've been a fan of Korean culture since you were 13 and a friend introduced you to the concept of K-pop, dramas and all the rest.

You were lucky enough to have well-off parents who let you study Korean from the age of 13 because you had become completely obsessed with everything about Korea.

But obviously your life didn't revolve around just that, of course you went to shows whenever you could, once you even got a trip to South Korea as a gift to go to a fan meeting.

But one thing that the idol life showed you was that you also wanted to be an artist, you were in doubt between acting and music. After all, you were good at both. In school plays you always got the lead.

Your mother played the piano and from a very early age taught you everything she knew about music, so one of your hobbies, and also a form of therapy, was writing songs.

When you were 18, a family friend who worked for Netflix knew he had a casting call that was a perfect fit for you. You took the test, with zero faith that you would pass.

But it ended up happening, the series was about a fantasy world, four wizard friends fighting an evil entity, you had a lot of fun recording the first season, you made incredible friends, but you never thought the series would be successful.

Until it exploded. And it became the number 1 series on Netflix, with everyone talking about it. And obviously you and your co-stars started doing press tours.

Jimmy Fallon Show

- Hey guys! Welcome back to the Tonight Show! Today we have a very special guest, a talented young man who is having great success with the new Netflix series: Witchbound Chronicles. Let's welcome the amazing Y/N! How are you, Y/N?

- Hi Jimmy! I'm great, thanks for having me here.

- It's a pleasure to have you. Firstly, congratulations on the success of your series! What has the experience been like seeing your face everywhere?

- It's surreal, Jimmy. I never imagined things would happen so quickly. I'm just enjoying every moment.

- This is amazing! Tell us a little about the series. What can fans expect?

- Well, the series is called "Witchbound Chronicles" and it takes place in a completely new world full of magic, fantastic creatures and lots of exciting twists. I play one of the main characters, a young man named Ethan, who discovers he has incredible magical abilities.

- This looks amazing! And what was the audition process like to get the role?

- It was a little crazy, actually. I auditioned without much expectation, and when I got the call that I had gotten the role, I couldn't believe it. It was a dream come true.

- And what was it like working with the cast and crew?

- Everyone was incredible. The cast is very talented, and the team behind the cameras did an incredible job bringing this magical world to life. I learned a lot from all of them.

- I'm sure fans would love to know if there are any funny or interesting behind-the-scenes stories you can share.

- Oh, definitely! One day, we were filming a scene with intense special effects, and one of the animatronics that plays the magical creatures ended up going out of control. It was hilarious to see everyone running for cover, but in the end, everything worked out, and the scene was incredible.

- And what can we expect from the future, Y/N? More projects on the small screen or maybe even the big screen?

- Absolutely, Jimmy! I love acting, and I hope to continue exploring different roles and challenges. Who knows what the future holds, right?

- Hey Y/N, our research team made some interesting discoveries on your social media. It seems like you're a big K-pop fan, is that right?

- Oh yes, Jimmy! I'm completely obsessed with K-pop, it's one of my passions.

- This is amazing! Any specific groups or artists that you really admire?

- For sure! I'm a big fan of Stray Kids.

- Oh, and our team also noticed that you have a certain “bias” as they say in K-pop at Felix! You've been expressing your crush on Felix a lot on social media. Any funny stories or embarrassing moments related to this?

- Well, now that you mention that this is public I would say that all my posts about Felix are kind of funny and embarrassing, actually. I try to keep it light and humorous, but of course, my friends always tease me a little about it.

- That is great! And if Felix or any of the Stray Kids were watching right now, what would you say to them?

- Wow, that's a tough question. I guess I would say how much they mean to me as an artist and as a person. Their work really inspires me, and I really admire their talent.

- I hope Felix sees this and who knows, maybe you can meet one day!

Some time later, on a live that Felix was doing, a fan asked if he had seen this interview.

Chat: Felix, did you see Jimmy Fallon's interview with Y/N, the actor from the series "Witchbound Chronicles"?

- Oh yeah! I saw! It was amazing. I couldn't stop smiling throughout the entire interview.

Chat: Y/N mentioned that he's a big fan of Stray Kids and that he has a crush on you. What was your reaction when you watched this?

- Oh, really? This is so cool! I was very flattered to learn that he is a Stray Kids fan. I think it's an honor when talented people like our work.

Chat: Would you have a message to send to Y/N?

For sure! Y/N, if you're watching, thank you so much for your support! It's amazing to know that you enjoy our work, and who knows, maybe one day we can meet. Keep being amazing!

Chat: It would be great to see a collaboration between Stray Kids and the series' soundtrack, wouldn't it?

- Absolutely! We would love it! Who knows what the future holds for us, right? Let's hope something like this happens.

Meanwhile at your house

- Y/N did you watch Felix's last live? - Your sister came running to ask you.

- No, I saw the notification but I was busy so I couldn't watch it.

- You NEED to see this excerpt!

Your sister takes the phone to you with a cut from the live stream where Felix Yongbok Lee is simply talking about you, and of course you completely freak out!

- MY GOD! FELIX KNOWS I EXIST!

- Imagine if you could meet him in person?

You stop and reflect for a second

- What is it? - Your sister asks.

- My Twitter account simply has 1001 posts about how handsome and hot I think he is! I need to deprive that now!

- Wow, but it's great that he knows you have a crush on him!

- He already knows because of that stupid interview, I don't need to be embarrassed anymore! - You run out to get your cell phone.

A while later on a gossip page

“Recently Y/N S/N deprived his Twitter account and opened a new one saying that it would be his professional account. Does the young actor have something to hide?”

/-/

Months later, with the end of recording the first season of the series, and the end of the press conferences, you feel that it is time to return to music. You had loved that whole period of recording and promoting the series but you felt the urge to write about it all, to put it all in the form of music, and deep in your heart, you wanted to write about something, something that you thought was really silly. actually, but your mother always told you that music was made to express all your feelings.

Unseen Hearts

🎶 Unseen hearts, a world apart,

In the shadows, you're the spark.

A crush so sweet, yet out of reach,

Dreams we chase, lessons we teach. 🎶

- This song is AMAZING! - A music producer friend of your mother said when he heard it.

- Did you really think so? I think it's no big deal.

- Is beautiful! What was the inspiration?

- Ah, silly thing, you know... stupid youthful passion - You said with a bit of shame.

- Y/N, I know you've been wanting to combine acting and music for so long, Bobby can give you that opportunity. – Your mother said

- You have so much potential Y/N. - Said Bobby, the producer and owner of the record company you were now part of.

- Now, ideas for a music video?

The Unseen Hearts video was a success, number 1 in views on YouTube. The clip takes place in a magical setting, reminiscent of the world of the series that you are part of. Include enchanted forests, ancient ruins and mystical locations, having a sense of magic and mystery. The story of the music video centers on you, showing your magical journey in search of your unreachable crush. Throughout the clip you searche for a masked figure who wears a necklace with the Korean character:  리

Comments on Twitter

🌟 Just watched the "Unseen Hearts" music video by @Y/NActorOfficial and I'm absolutely enchanted! The magical symbolism and emotional depth in every scene got me hooked. Matt's talent is truly spellbinding! 🔮💖 #UnseenHearts #Y/NMagic

✨ The "Unseen Hearts" music video is a masterpiece! 🎬✨ Y/N's portrayal of an unattainable crush, wrapped in magical elements, is pure art. The visuals, the symbolism – everything is on point! 🌌🎶 #WitchboundChronicles #MagicalMusic

🌌 Theory time! What if the "Unseen Hearts" video is a metaphor for the struggles we face in expressing our feelings? The crush, shrouded in magic, symbolizes the elusive nature of emotions. Y/N's journey represents the pursuit of self-discovery. 🧐💭 #UnseenHeartsTheory

📜 Lyric interpretation theory: What if the lyrics in "Unseen Hearts" reflect Y/N's emotions towards Felix? The masked figure embodies the lyrical expression of an unspoken crush, with the ideogram pendant serving as a musical symbol of admiration. 🎤💔 #LyricConnection #UnseenHeartsEmotion

🎵 Melodic connection theory: The musical journey in "Unseen Hearts" might represent Y/N's emotional connection to Felix. The masked figure, with Felix's ideogram, is the elusive muse driving the rhythm of Y/N's heart. 🎭💖 #MusicalMuse #UnseenHeartsMelody

//

The Kelly Clarkson Show

- Hey guys! We're here with the talented Y/N, who recently released the amazing music video "Unseen Hearts." Y/N, first, I want to say that the music video is amazing, but everyone is wondering: what is the meaning behind it?

- Hi Kelly! First of all, thank you for the compliment. You know, "Unseen Hearts" is a magical journey, an exploration of emotions and personal challenges. I wanted to convey the idea of pursuing something that seems unattainable, but at the same time, it is an experience of self-discovery.

- Oh, this is fascinating! And many fans are curious about the character that appears in the clip. Can you tell us more about this?

- Of course, Kelly. The ideogram is an artistic representation, a kind of personal symbol. It's a way to add a layer of mystery to the story, allowing each person to find their own meaning in the song and video.

- I get it, I love this enigmatic approach! And what would you say to fans speculating about the music video?

- Well, it's amazing to see the enthusiasm of the fans and the different interpretations they are creating. The beauty of art is in its subjectivity, right? I love seeing the theories and stories that people are coming up with. It's a gift to see how music resonates in unique ways for everyone.

//

Live from Felix a few days later

Chat: Hi, Felix! Did you see Y/N's new video, "Unseen Hearts"? What did you think?

- Oh, sure! I watched it, and I have to say Y/N did an amazing job. The magical atmosphere, the emotional narrative, everything was very well done. I really liked.

Chat: And the music? Do you think it has some connection with you? After all, the character with your name appears in the clip!

- Well, it's interesting, right? I think art is interpretive, and each person can have their own vision. If music is an artistic expression, it's hard to say exactly what it means to Y/N. But I loved seeing how fans are creating their own theories and stories around it.

Chat: We are really curious! Do you think Y/N might have been inspired by you for the song?

- You know, Y/N is an incredible artist, and I'm just one of the many artists who can inspire him. I think the beauty of music is its ability to connect with different experiences and emotions. If Y/N found inspiration in something we experienced, it's an honor.

Chat: Hey Felix, we know Y/N mentioned he's a Stray Kids fan. Do you think he could have a crush on you?

- Oh, really? That's kind of funny to think about. I think it's always flattering to know that people admire our work, whether as artists or as people. And well, I don't really know about that. I'm grateful for the fans' support and affection, but personal relationships are something private, right? Let's focus on the music and Y/N's work, which is incredible.

Chat: We're just kidding, Felix! But seriously, what was it like for you to see your character in his video?

It was a pleasant surprise, for sure! Y/N is a talented artist, and it was cool to see that special touch in the video. I think he did a wonderful job of creating something unique and meaningful.

//

A few weeks later you are invited to perform at the Billboard Music Awards, it would be your first time performing Unseen Hearts in front of such a large audience, you were nervous obviously, but something made you even more nervous.

- Y/N you have no idea what I discovered! - Bobby, who was now your manager, called you excitedly.

- What was it?

- So I was organizing your participation in this year's BMAs, and you know who will be there, STRAY KIDS! They will also participate

You froze, you had followed the news, given interviews, seen Felix's live and knew that everyone already knew the obvious, you had burst out writing a song about the crush you had on a boy you saw once at a fan meeting.

- Y/N… are you there? - Bobby asked from the other side.

- I'm sorry, I just got a little distracted.

- I thought you would be more excited.

- Yes, I'm excited, of course, it's going to be really cool - You said a little disconcerted.

- Now are you ready for the big news?

- My God, is there more?

- It has! So the organization was talking to me, and they asked me if you would be willing to sit at the same table as them, you know, you speak Korean, so you can help the members who don't speak it to fit in.

- BOBBY WHAT DID YOU ANSWER?

- I confirmed your place with them of course, I thought you would love it!

- ARE YOU TELLING ME I'M GOING TO COME FACE TO FACE WITH THE GUY I WROTE A SONG ABOUT?????

- Wait, was the song really about Felix?

- My God Bobby, I thought you were my manager and paid attention to the nuances.

You wanted to pass out obviously.

//

Billboard Music Awards Day - Red carpet.

- Hi Matt! We are excited to see your performance today. What can we expect from this presentation?

- Hello! I'm looking forward to the night, it's going to be amazing. The performance will be full of energy, with a touch of magic and emotion. I hope everyone enjoys it!

- Good luck! Now, we've heard rumors that you and Stray Kids have a special connection. Any future collaborations on the horizon?

- Well, I'm a big fan of Stray Kids, they're so talented. Who knows what the future holds? I'm always open to surprising collaborations. - You say with a bright smile

- Hmm, intriguing! And regarding the "Unseen Hearts" video, many fans speculate about the inspiration behind it. Any subliminal messages?

- Ah, "Unseen Hearts" is an emotional journey, an exploration of personal feelings and challenges. Fan interpretations are fascinating, and I like to leave the song open to different meanings.

- What about the ideograms? We saw Felix from Stray Kids in the video. Any special meaning? - The interviewer asks with an insinuating smile

- Ideograms are like artistic elements, each one can find its own meaning. Sometimes it's just a way to add a special touch to the visual narrative. - You say, wanting to curse yourself for when you had the brilliant idea of putting one of the ideograms of Felix's name in the music video

Interview with Stray Kids

- And we're here with Stray Kids! You guys are killing it as always. We're curious to know, are there any secret collaborations you have in mind? Maybe something with our dear Y/N, who is also here today?

- Well, you know, we are always open to new musical experiences. Y/N is an amazing artist, so who knows what could happen in the future? - Felix responds.

- Interesting! And speaking of collaborations, we saw Felix's character in Y/N's "Unseen Hearts" video. Any idea what this could mean?

- It seems like Y/N wanted to add a special touch to the video. I don't know if there's a deeper meaning, but it's an honor to be included in his art in some way. - Felix says smiling

- What if we talk about the music itself? Any thoughts on "Unseen Hearts"? - The interviewer says wanting to provoke.

- Of course, we all watched the clip and were impressed. The song has a unique vibe, and Y/N's performance is engaging. It's great to see artists exploring different styles. - Bang Chan responds

- It seems like there are a lot of secrets being kept! Speaking of secrets, do you have any future projects that you haven't revealed yet?

- Well, we never reveal all our secrets, do we? You can expect more surprises in the future. - Hyunjin responds, ending the interview.

//

Later, after the red carpet, you have to face reality and go to your seat next to the members of Stray Kids. You're dying of embarrassment, not only because you meet artists you admire so much, but because you know what the topic of the moment is.

You greet everyone in Korean, trying to be as polite as possible, they are all incredibly kind to you.

When it's time to sit down, it's as if fate hates you, and of course your seat was next to Felix.

- I really enjoyed your series on Netflix. - Felix said trying to start a conversation.

- Serious? Didn't you find it a little too fanciful?

- It's too fanciful, but I like things like that, it's really cool.

- Thank you very much - You said blushing.

He looked incredibly handsome that night, you were trying very hard not to stare.

- I really liked Unseen Hearts too, it's a beautiful song.

- Oh thank you, but it doesn't even compare to your work, I'm still quite an amateur. - You always had this habit of diminishing yourself.

- Hey don't say that, your work is incredible. - He takes a strand of your hair and puts it back. - Your eyes are very E/C

He immediately takes his hand out of your hair and apologizes. There was a slight awkward atmosphere but the touch of his fingers in your hair were still there. “You’re not living a fanfic, focus on reality”, you forced yourself to think.

You didn't want to do it but you had to, you didn't want them to keep bothering the boy because of the damn ideogram in the clip.

- Look at the clip, and the ideogram, I'm sorry they keep disturbing you with this, I saw some of your lives and how embarrassed you were.

- Hey no, I thought it was really cool! Was it really a reference for me?

You look down, well, there was no point in lying anymore, right? At least you would leave with the knowledge that your idol would never see you as anything more

- Yes, it was, but you know we all have crushes on famous people, don't worry, it doesn't mean anything big.

- What a shame - He said looking down

What? - You were shocked.

- I wouldn't mind, you know, if it was a genuine crush.

You didn't have time to respond because Bobby came to call you to say that you needed to get ready for your presentation. You ran away with your heart racing, what did that mean, what did Felix mean?

//

- Ladies and gentlemen, singing Unseen Hearts Y/N S/N

On the Billboard Music Awards stage, the "Unseen Hearts" moment begins with you positioned center stage, radiating a magnetic presence. The mesmerizing melody fills the room, creating a magical atmosphere that captures everyone's attention.

The scenery is full of fantastic elements, as you immerse yourself in the performance, conveying the emotion of the music through each note. The audience, enveloped by the magic of the presentation, watches attentively.

During the performance, the camera occasionally cuts to the audience, where Felix from Stray Kids is sitting. His eyes meet at various moments, creating a visual connection that transcends the stage. You, while singing, exchange intense glances with Felix in the audience, conveying deep emotions and a unique harmony.

The exchange of glances is loaded with meaning, as if you were sharing your story not only with the audience, but also with Felix. Every facial expression reflects the intensity of the song, as your eyes meet Felix's, conveying a silent, emotional narrative.

At the end of the performance, the audience bursts into applause, recognizing the beauty and emotion of the performance. You, as you come down from the stage, exchange a final look with Felix, a moment that remains suspended in the air before being lost in the effervescence of the applause.

On twitter

🌟 The exchange of looks between Y/N and Felix during "Unseen Hearts" at the #BBMAs was simply magical! This emotional connection transcended the stage. ✨🎶 #UnseenHeartsMagic

😍 I can't get over the intensity of the looks between Y/N and Felix during the performance! Their chemistry is palpable, and "Unseen Hearts" became even more special. 🔥💖 #BBMAs # Y/N xFelixMoment

🧙‍♂️ I'm absolutely delighted with the performance of "Unseen Hearts" at the #BBMAs. The looks between Y/N and Felix added an extra layer of magic to the performance! 🌈🔮 #EnchantedConnection

🎭 "Unseen Hearts" at the #BBMAs was an emotional journey! The looks between Y/N and Felix brought a unique depth to the presentation. A masterpiece of connection and magic. 🌌🎶 #MysticalPerformance

🤩 The performance of "Unseen Hearts" at the #BBMAs was a visual and emotional spectacle! Y/N and Felix exchanging looks made everything even more captivating. 😊💫 #KPopMagicMoment

😭 I cried at the beauty of the performance of "Unseen Hearts". The intensity of the looks between Y/N and Felix is heartbreaking. A unique emotional experience. 💔🌟 #BBMAs #EmotionalJourney

🎶 The chemistry between Y/N and Felix during "Unseen Hearts" at the #BBMAs is something that cannot be described in words. A perfect fusion of music, emotion and connection. Angry! 👏🌈 #MusicalAlchemy

🌀 "Unseen Hearts" at #BBMAs left my soul vibrating. The looks between Y/N and Felix transcended the stage, creating a unique and magical experience. 🔮✨ #MysticVibes #UnseenHeartsVibes

//

You couldn't believe what had just happened, you had performed Unseen Hearts in front of hundreds of people but it was as if you could only see Felix, you were completely embarrassed by it. How could you be so unprofessional to stare at the boy like that? What would they say about you? What would they say about him?

A knock on the dressing room door makes you stand up. It was the boys from Stray Kids and you quickly rushed to open it.

- Y/N, man, you just killed it on stage! It was amazing! - Bang Chan says hugging you.

You're grateful for the compliment, but a wave of self-consciousness hits you. Did they notice your distraction? Did they notice the prolonged glances in Felix's direction?

- Oh, thanks, Chan! I'm glad you liked it. - You say smiling, trying to hide it.

- Did you see the audience? Everyone was mesmerized. It looks like you worked some real magic up there! - Jeongin says.

Everyone laughs, and you join in the laughter, trying to keep your self-critical thoughts away.

- Y/N, that performance was incredible. You brought such a unique energy to the song. - Felix says with a shy smile.

- And I think our friend here needs to speak to you in private. - Changbin says leading the others to leave the room.

Okay, you thought: now he's going to say that what I did was horrible, that it could cause gossip and horrible repercussions for his career. And so you will have ruined the mere chance of having a friendship with someone you admire.

But his response was very different from what you imagined.

- Yeah… I wanted to ask… if you want to go out with me, do you know after the awards?

The initial perplexity is replaced by a mixture of relief and surprise. You expected the worst, but here Felix is, not mentioning anything about the intense stares, but rather extending an invitation to hang out.

- Wow, of course, I would love to! It would be amazing. - You smile trying to hide your surprise.

Felix seems to relax a little, like he's relieved by his answer.

- Great so! Will be cool. The awards are going to be incredible, but I think after that we can relax a little, what do you think?

- I will love it!

- Excellent! See you after the awards, then. - He says with a dazzling smile

He turns to leave the dressing room, and you stay there, processing the unexpected turn of events. What seemed like a potential uncomfortable situation turned into an invitation to hang out. Perhaps the intense looks were perceived differently by Felix.

Later that night…

"Y/N from 'Unseen Hearts' and Felix from Stray Kids spotted holding hands after the Billboard Music Awards!"

"The beginning of a new ship? Y/N and Felix, moments of romance after the awards."

"Fans are ecstatic over photos of Y/N and Felix together. Could this be the start of a new friendship or something more?"

And on Twitter…

😱 Holding hands? This is real? Y/N and Felix together? I'm freaking out! 😍🥰 # #Y/NxFelix  #UnseenHeartsLove

🚢 Is a new ship being born? The internet needs to know! 😏🚀 # Y/Nlix #ShipSpeculation

🌟 The friendship between Y/N and Felix is so beautiful! We loved seeing the two together. 🤝💖 #FriendshipGoals # Y/NAndFelix

🧐 Holding hands? Are we all witnessing the beginning of something special? 🤔🌈 # Y/NAndFelix #SpeculationsRising

📸 Exclusive photos of Matt and Felix leaving the event. Are we seeing the birth of a new partnership? 🤝💫 #CelebrityNews # Y/NFelixMoments

📚 What do you think of a fanfic based on these photos? 😏💕 # Y/NlixFanfic #ShippingDreams

And so maybe Unseen Hearts weren't so unseen...

[tunamayojazz]

Love your art, any Toge/Yuuta fanfic recommendations? Thanks so much!!

hi!! thank you so much...🥺🩷🩷 and i am SO glad you asked this. i have so many!! here are the ones i read/reread more recently along with some of the tags. tried to make every rec here different from each other hehe have fun reading!!! can't help it (if you look like an angel) by glimmiks (12.4k)

tags: college au, friends to lovers, mutual pining, IKEA

THIS WAS SO FUN TO READ PLEASEEEE i absolutely love college aus so much. and you just know the 2nd years would be the most fun and chaotic as college students. their dynamic is just chefs KISS, and it's written so well here. the mutual pining in here is truly a 10-course meal and i always go back for another round.

i'm alright if you're alright by anonymous (14.2k)

tags: spoilers up to ch146, fluff, hurt/comfort, injury recovery, fix-it, love confessions, pining

post-shibuya fic excellence. i always have such a great time reading this like inuokkos really do eat so well in this fandom. yuta pining is always so great to read like he is Longingly thinking about toge at all times im cry

Magnificently Cursed by diggingupthegrave (91.2k)

tags: dark academia, magic au, magic school au, slow burn, angst, mutual pining

i will always always recommend diggingupthegrave fics. they are easily my favorite inuokko writer pls you have to read all their inuokko fics...i saved this particular one of theirs to read for much later bc i knew it was going to change my life (7 chapters ok) and boy did it do exactly that. the way they implemented canon elements into a magic setting was so so brillaint and i savored every bit of it.

Beat the Turtle Drum by CasuallyScreaming (7.4k) tags: major character death, post-shibuya incident arc, angst, minimal comfort, no shibuya spoilers read this before sleeping the other night and honestly how i managed to still fall asleep after was my body trying to protect me from full out bawling and having a mental breakdown...i don't think i've read a lot of MCD inuokko but god this one shook me to my core. almost like the feeling of loss and grief were bleeding through my phone screen. so well written and while it's definitely mostly painful, the ending....well you'll find out :')

a special occasion by Cheshire (2.5k) tags: idiots in love, established relationship, first dates this was so so cute...!!!!!!! panda: but aren't you two already dating? yuta: well yes! no. sorta, kinda. super cozy and fluffy read!!

is this how every day begins? by mitgi (5.4k) tags: roommates, living together, mutual pining, hurt/comfort, angst i will always love me a roommate au. this fic was such a lovely read and i'm actually going to reread this right after i finish writing this! there's so much to explore in inuokko's relationship and also when it's in different settings. every time i think about how the actual source material are literal crumbs, i'm just even more amazed by how writers are able to draw out the most of what info we have and write their mannerisms so well. it all feels right and so WARM UOGHHHHH

haunted by sieling_fan (3.3k)

tags: pining, hurt/comfort, canon typical angst, character study

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

you showed up just in time by diggingupthegrave (14.6k)

tags: time travel, friends to lovers, mutual pining, hurt/comfort, slight age gap

another diggingupthegrave fic that had me crying screaming shaking throwing up because god. this was so so good. the build up had me at the edge of my seat bc like oh my god what happened? what's happening?? why is this like that? @#$%^&*()_!!!!!!!!!!!!! and when it's all pieced together? oh it ended me. read this again and again for DAYS you would think i was researching it for a thesis or something. take your time reading this btw like im so serious.

okie that's all for me from now, i have so many more to rec honestly....sending out 100000000000 hearts to inuokko writers you are my roman empire....