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oh-boy-me · 3 years

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I found your speculation of Satan having a crush on mc from the get go verry interesting. I was wondering if you have any speculations around the other boys? Like in what order do you think the boys fell for mc? Any specific points in the story that you think are the "fall for mc" moments for them?

(HFSDHFSD LISTEN I’ve had this in my drafts for AGES and I’m so sorry I’m just now getting to actually posting it ;w; )

I’m MORE than happy to speculate on this! For the brothers, at least, because I haven’t read up to the parts where the other characters show notable interest in you

Putting most of this under a cut for long post and spoilers, but the tl;dr (with some mysterious elements to catch your interest heheheh) is that I believe the brothers “fall for MC” in this order:

1. Satan 2. Mammon 3. (Lucifer) 4. (Levi) 3. Belphie 4. Beel 4. Levi 4. Lucifer 7. Asmo

That must look a little weird; I hope I’ve piqued your interest!

Now, what am I defining as falling for MC? For consistency, we’re going to consider a brother falling for MC being the moment when they themself realize that they might have feelings for them.

#1 Demon: Satan Moment: As early as day 4

First up is Satan, who I’ve already explained here. An argument can be made that Mammon catches feelings first, but assuming a real-time progression, Satan’s first text reaches MC on their fourth day in the Devildom.

#2 Demon: Mammon Moment: Lesson 4-1

Mammon is interesting, because with this analysis he’s one of only two brothers for which you can actually get a calendar date for their falling for MC. You can do this because the first few lessons cover a very short span of time.

According to the fact that Lucifer says you don’t want to be late on your first day of school after giving you a hint about Goldie, MC makes a pact with Mammon on their second day in the Devildom. (You don’t go to school on day 1.)

Lucifer blocks MC from the attic on the night of day 3, and after that things get shaky again until you hit the TSL movie night with Beel and Mammon.

The reason the movie night is interesting is because Beel specifically states that midterms are coming up soon. Based on the game’s Japanese origin, we’re going to assume that RAD also follows the same three-term system that Japanese schools do. This places the TSL marathon at about a month into MC’s stay.

Anyway, we’re basing Mammon’s interest in you on pretty obvious factors:

We basically don’t see any of Mammon’s trademark tsundere nature until after these lessons. Before this it’s not him being tsundere, he’s genuinely annoyed with you.

He left a toothbrush and charger in your room sometime between Lesson 3-10 and 4-4.

This famous line:

He probably developed feelings sometime during the TSL marathon, but I think it was when you were in danger, and even though he kept saying he’d let you die his first instinct was to save you, that he understood what those feelings were.

#3. Demon: (Lucifer) Moment: Lesson 12-19

Crossed out and in parentheses Lucifer is the first one where we start to go off of assumptions and headcanon rather than concrete in game evidence, but. I’m sure your bigger question is “why is he crossed out AND in parentheses AND why does he show up again later.”

The moment I listed is the lesson where you and Lucifer have to fall in love to escape the “horror game” that Levi “trapped” you in. He spends most of the time seeming like he isn’t interested and doing it out of necessity, but then he turns around and says these lines.

Assuming that was almost a confession, I wouldn’t be surprised if he decided right there, in that moment, that he was developing feelings. Lucifer is very self aware, and very sure of himself, and it’s also not like him to suddenly change his mind about how he’s treating things. If he was hiding his feelings the whole time, I don’t think he would have almost slipped at all.

Of course, right after this, you announce that you’ve met Belphegor, and his developing feelings are overshadowed by rage.

And of course, Lesson 12-19 never happened.

What?

Let me remind you of the timeline. Barbatos explains in Lesson 16-19 that he has the power to choose any timeline as the sole reality, and he chose the timeline you traveled to.

When you jump back in time, you end up in the moment right after making a pact with Satan (Lesson 12-10). This means that everything that happened between Lessons 12-10 and 15-17 was erased from history.

The timeline in Season One looks a little something like this, to simplify.

Admittedly, we don’t know how far into their conversation MC and Lucifer make it in the second timeline, but on Lucifer’s part I don’t think it changes much.

This timeline stuff is important because

#4 Demon: (Leviathan) Moment: Lesson 14-4

Ok, first, I have to say that I really hate the way MC and Levi make up in Lesson 14. imo it has the potential to be really manipulative on both sides. But that’s not the point of this post.

Levi does NOT have a crush on you before Belphie shows up out of nowhere. In Lesson 14-4, he’s talking to himself, and distinctly complains about losing a friend, and how Henry is his only friend.

He’s also refusing to acknowledge your existence, and he’s talking to a fish, so there’s no reason for him to hide how he really feels in the moment.

Then, later on in the same chapter, this is Levi’s response to seeing MC hug Lucifer.

I’m assuming MC isn’t the one he’s jealous of. But what’s interesting here is that, as far as I can remember, this is the first time Levi ever expresses jealousy about you in any sense, platonic or romantic. You don’t really interact with Levi one on one between Lesson 14-4 and this moment, so 14-4 is the most likely catalyst for this change.

Levi does say “you’re my true friend” at the end of 14-4, but you are not a fish, and that doesn’t change the fact that he could have been like “oh wow MC didn’t abandon me they really like me oh no I really like them”

Also, by 16-A he canonically likes you.

But just like with the last one, this exchange never happened and Levi never fell for you.

#3 Demon: Belphie Moment: Between Lessons 18-15 and 18-19

Now Belphie is interesting, because I would argue that he was trying to fall in love with you for a while. All that “making up for lost time” and seeming to spend every waking hour with you in lessons 17 and 18 to me point pretty heavily to the idea that he wants to feel the same way about you that his brothers do. Whether it’s to feel more connected with them or from a genuine interest in you is unclear though.

But then he decides to give you a pact as a present, which is a pretty big deal. Most pacts in the game are made before the demon has feelings for you, but aside from Belphie, Satan is the only one who brings it up himself. And since like I said Satan pretty clearly liked you before making a pact, the same can probably be said of Belphie.

I should also mention that Belphie muses over giving you a pact in Lesson 18-A, which takes place before Lesson 17-7 at the latest. But we have to remember that this is before you’ve helped him mend his relationships with his brothers, and therefore he barely knows you. Satan also barely knew you, but Belphie has the added problem of mixing up you and Lilith. You can make arguments for the others when they were uber nice to you in Lesson 16-19, but for Belphie there’s really no other possible reason than Lilith.

However, Lesson 18-15 is the one where Belphie says he’s going to move forward with his life and stop putting things on hold for Lilith.

So, chances are his attachment to you is pretty unhealthy at first, but I’m choosing the timeframe I did as the moment because in 18-19 he explicitly states that he isn’t confusing you with Lilith.

This would be the moment of confirmation that he likes you, not the idea of what you might represent.

#4 Demon: Leviathan, Beelzebub, Lucifer Moment: Sometime during the time skip

I don’t think we see these three fall for you on camera. The time skip covers literal months, and I think they fall for you in somewhere in that long period of time.

I don’t think I need to tell you that Levi and Beel like you by the time Lesson 20 comes along, since they both confess to you.

Lucifer doesn’t explicitly confess, but if you choose to hug him, he says this

Which heavily implies that he wants to be the one most important to you. Also, I don’t think he’d have made a pact at all otherwise.

#7 Demon: Asmodeus Moment: Lesson 19-17

For Asmo, I think we see the EXACT moment he realizes he’s in love with you.

First off, in Lesson 16-A he noticeably isn’t openly interested in you in any way other than superficially. Granted, 16-A never happened, but it does confirm that he didn’t like you before then.

Then, in his part of Lesson 19, you go drinking with him. Early in the night, he says this.

His answer to your prompt of romance suggests that he doesn’t understand the fact that he does like you like that, or at least that he’s in denial.

However, then you beat him at a drinking game, and the reality of you leaving him behind comes crashing down on him.

The drastic change makes me think that this is the very moment he understands his feelings.

And that’s it! I hope this was an interesting read, and sorry again it took SO long.

#obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me analysis #renoodle #gardengnosis #image

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siswritesyanderes · 3 years

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If it had been Jasper-Sadie or Alice-Sadie as the vampires and finding their third later, how if at all would any of the “prior” story (the Twilght saga proper) have changed?

This turns the timeline inside out, but Meyer was never great at those anyway.

(Hi, if you're from the Twilight fandom stumbling across this post without context, Sadie is my OC in a yandere Alice/yandere Jasper/OC fic that you can read here.)

Ohhh, so much potential there! I can't answer that in full, because doing so would spoil what Sadie's potential vampire ability is. (Super sorry about that. Feel free to ask again after that information has come up in Rule One!)

I can say that both Bella and Edward would take to confiding in her and seeking her counsel with regards to their relationship. Especially if it's a Sadie-Alice duo; Edward would be super close with both Sadie and Alice (like he's close with Alice in canon), and while he sometimes gets frustrated with Alice, he pretty much always respects Sadie. It's like, Alice would be Bella's best friend and Edward's partner in crime (since she's still the one who would agree to kidnap Bella, whereas Sadie would never), and Sadie would be Bella's confidante and Edward's moral compass. Both Bella and Edward would go to Sadie for advice about each other, and Sadie, though startled by their neediness, would always have something valuable to say.

(Picture Bella or Edward bursting into Sadie's room with a question, and Sadie, wide-eyed, putting down whatever she's doing and saying, "Alrighty then, have a seat.)

Edward trusts that Sadie wouldn't lie to him, so the urgency in having Bella run to him in Italy before he sparkles in front of people (lest he read Alice's thoughts and assume she's lying to him) wouldn't be a thing; Sadie just runs Bella to Edward with vampire speed and is subjected to that whole reunion as an awkward third wheel while Alice parks the stolen car.

Also, Sadie would tip every fight slightly more in favor of the Cullens, but she would also have a habit of really wanting to talk to the enemies instead of attacking them. This is good/useful with the Volturi but not so good/useful with Victoria and Riley.

Oh! Also, Sadie would realize that Victoria will probably follow Edward's scent, in Eclipse, and Sadie would accompany him and Bella in sitting the battle out, so that they have more backup against Victoria. Jasper and Alice wouldn't be privy to the fact that Victoria is coming; this is just a realization that Sadie has that Edward hears in her mind. (As far as Jasper and Alice are concerned, Sadie is sitting the battle out just to be safe, and they're happy that she won't be in harm's way.) This is where Sadie's need to talk to enemies would become a problem, because both Victoria and Riley are too far gone to listen to reason, but Sadie really believes in them and wants to convince them they don't have to die today. It still turns out fine, though. Sadie gets a little hurt, but she's fine. Alice and Jasper would be absolutely smothering, after. Victoria is lucky she's already dead, because they would make her suffer.

And Sadie would think to explain things to Irina before Alice realizes that Irina is going to the Volturi, so that whole misunderstanding never happens.

All of that being said, the thought of "Yandere Alice meets Sadie first" and "Yandere Jasper meets Sadie first" got really interesting to me. So I have to talk about those scenarios immediately.

I'm going to place Sadie sometime in the twentieth century in both cases, and I'm going to try to let the time period matter as little as possible, but feel free to imagine them in 50s or 60s attire, lol. (Or 70s or 80s; again, it doesn't matter that much; I'm just placing her in the twentieth century to keep the rough order of events the same, kind of.) I'm approaching this with the assumption that Alice and Jasper still become vampires in the same way/at the same time as they do in canon; they just meet at different times. I'm not dealing with the Confederate thing here, though, because I'll be dealing with it in Rule One.

I'm gonna go ahead and put it all under the cut. (And if your experience of Rule One is more invested in the potential for wholesome romance than the yandere aspect, maybe the rest of this isn't for you, because this is definitely more yandere-leaning, lol.)

Alice-Sadie

Alice knows three things: 1. Her own name. 2. That she is going to join the Cullens. 3. That Sadie, whom she has not yet met, is her soulmate.

Though she slips up every now and then, Alice does her best not to eat humans. She wants to fit in with the Cullens by the time she finds them, so she's accustoming herself to the animal diet. Anyway, she has a mate out there whom she will meet as a human, and she has to get herself under control before she can risk being around her.

The thing is, Alice knows about Sadie before Sadie is actually an option, so she has to kill time so that she doesn't meet Sadie too early. And Alice hates waiting, so she goes ahead and introduces herself to the Cullens before Sadie. She tells them all about how she'll have a soulmate soon, and how it's killing her to keep her distance but she knows things will be way better if she never meets Sadie as a child. She decorates her room with things that Sadie likes, anticipating that one day she'll be sharing the room with Sadie. Honestly, if it weren't for Edward's mind reading, the rest of the Cullens might think Sadie was an imaginary friend or something.

(Rosalie would normally take issue with Alice's plans to intrude on the life of a human she's never met just because of a potential future where they're in love, but she doesn't really take Alice's fantasizing seriously until it's too late.)

One day, Alice just sort of disappears from the Cullen house, and only Edward knows where she's gone.

Sadie is finally at the right age; it's time.

Alice appears in Sadie's life, and everything she says and does is perfect. She rockets from stranger to friend to best friend at an impressive rate, her precognition easily compensating for Sadie's hesitancy (and Sadie would start off more wary than she is in Rule One, due to the time period). Having left the rest of the Cullens, for the time being, there is nothing (read: no one) holding Alice back from being absolutely surgical about making herself important in Sadie's life and subtly isolating her. She gives expensive gifts, and comprehensive compliments, and she always knows what to say to make Sadie like and trust her more.

When Sadie starts to become suspicious about the evolution of their friendship, Alice drops the vampire bomb and the soulmate bomb all at once, showing Sadie her speed and strength and sparkles. There was no better way to do it. Alice checked; this was the absolute best set of circumstances for the reveal.

Sadie asks for time to process the information. She asks for space. Alice graciously allows it; she's practically living with Sadie at this point, anyway. (Not that Sadie knows it. But yeah, she's in Sadie's house pretty much 24/7 (minus her hunting trips), dodging notice with stealth and psychic powers.)

When Sadie is ready to talk again, Alice pours out every reassurance: how she will never stop loving her; how she would never hurt her; how she thinks about her all the time and loves her so much. Sadie isn't fully won over by the whole vampire lover concept, but Alice does convince her to come meet her family.

They go to the Cullen house. Alice shows her off to everyone, and Rosalie is stunned, and Emmett laughs incredulously. Edward and Carlisle make polite introductions, and Esme hugs her, just glad to see Alice so happy. (Esme has been so worried about her newest daughter, so flighty and constantly pining for someone who wasn't there. And then she disappeared, and anything could have happened to her! But now she's back, and she's brought someone lovely, and she looks happier than Esme has ever seen her.) Carlisle and Edward give Sadie a more in-depth explanation of how vampires operate and why the bond between mates is a big deal. Esme cooks her a huge meal. Before they know it, nighttime has come, and Sadie falls asleep in Alice's room.

She wasn't drugged or anything; Alice just perfectly orchestrated a set of circumstances in which she would be tired by this exact time.

When she wakes up, Alice is an utter angel, offering her breakfast and a bath and telling her that there's more to see, around the house. She hasn't seen Rosalie's garage, yet! She hasn't seen Esme's garden. And soon enough she's sleeping over again.

On that third day at the house, Rosalie pulls Sadie aside to say that she'll drive Sadie home, if Sadie needs her to. But Alice has done her job well; Sadie likes Alice, and she likes the Cullens, and most of all, she's so curious about vampires and the world thereof. She's willing to stay and learn, provided she can visit her friends and family, and provided Alice doesn't try to change her. She fills several journals with what she learns about vampires, all in the span of a single year. She learns so much, and she's never satisfied that she's learned enough.

When Alice asks her to let Carlisle change her, she chooses exactly the right conversation, exactly the right approach, and exactly the right time. Sadie agrees and becomes a vampire. (She kind of has to, for this prompt, lol.) Rosalie is annoyed, but she knows that Sadie thought the matter over thoroughly.

When the day comes that Alice sees Jasper in their future, she drags Sadie off to meet him, barely explaining herself beyond "We have another mate!". Sadie goes along with it because she's used to Alice's antics.

They meet this crimson-eyed, roguishly handsome vampire, and Jasper is pretty instantly enthralled with them both. He's curious about their golden eyes, charmed by Alice's forwardness, and amused by Sadie's mix of intrigue and wariness. The emotional flavor of Alice's joy and cheerfulness, and of Sadie's curiosity and uncertainty, are enough to pretty much have him wrapped around their fingers right away.

Sadie's reaction is more "Ohhhh, Alice, this guy eats people..."

Alice just goes, "It's okay. Jasper will be willing to change his diet if we ask him to. Won't you, Jasper?"

And it's so presumptuous, but also he's into it, because Sadie has already made it clear that eating humans is a deal-breaker for her, and he doesn't want this meeting to end.

He joins the family, and it feels like the best thing ever; he has two amazing soulmates, and he belongs to a large coven that will always be safe from strangers. The animal-eating thing is a downside, but there's no help for that.

The dynamic for the next little while is that Alice is already in love with both Jasper and Sadie, Jasper is already in love with Alice and Sadie, and Sadie is in love with Alice and polite to Jasper but isn't quite sure about him. Like, she's in a peculiar place of "We are soulmates, and I do like you and feel an attraction to you, and I understand how our personalities are good together, but I don't know how long it'll take me to become comfortable with your past", and Jasper is just falling over himself to earn her approval, but she's comfortable with allowing it to take time.

(Rosalie is secretly very entertained by the whole thing, and Emmett is not-so-secretly entertained.)

Unlike in canon, Jasper would never suggest eating any human ever again; even once Sadie is comfortable with him, he never wants to risk making her doubt him the way she did in the beginning.

Jasper-Sadie

So at this point in his life, Jasper is eating people. His eyes are bright red, and he is ruthless, and Alice isn't around to temper that side of him.

This is absolutely a kidnapping situation.

When he runs into Sadie (entirely by happenstance), he doesn't know immediately that he is in love with her; he just knows that he wants to follow her, so he does. He stalks after her like he has stalked lots of prey in the past. Her blood doesn't sing to him, though; after several hours of just tailing her, he realizes that he just likes to hear her breathe and speak and laugh. He likes to look at her. He likes to taste her emotions on the air. He likes this human.

Then he realizes that he's in love with her, as much as Peter is in love with Charlotte.

He never wants to stop looking at her, listening to her talk...

He manages to get her alone, and he introduces himself in a charismatic, gentlemanly fashion. He kisses the back of her hand (managing to ignore the feel and sound of her pulse so close; he shouldn't take a risk like that again) and says, "Good afternoon, ma'am. My name is Jasper Whitlock. May I ask what your name is?"

She notices the coldness of his skin and the redness of his eyes (and again, time-period-wise, this interaction is very weird), but he is sending her the most powerful waves of comfort and calm that he can. She is dazed and perplexed, but not afraid, as she answers, "I'm Sadie Gilder."

It's the most beautiful name he has ever heard.

He abducts her pretty much then and there; he leads her away with a request that she accompany him and a heavy layer of mood control. Sadie is able to break out of the daze (through sheer overthinking) after they've walked together awhile; by the time she asks, "Wait, where are we?", they've reached the secluded mansion of an old widow.

(Jasper doesn't need a place to sleep, but his Sadie does, so he quickly identified this place as the best option.)

The order in which Jasper eats the occupants of the house and brings Sadie inside the house is up to your imagination, as is whether or not Sadie ends up seeing any bodies or seeing him with blood on his face and clothes. Either way, just the kidnapping itself is enough to have Sadie panicking, and he hates to feel her fear.

He holds her, gives her calming energy, and whispers to her. "Don't be scared. I won't hurt you, Perfect Sadie. I won't eat you. You're too special. Just gonna keep you right here." (He's just eaten a lot of people, so he's okay with breathing right next to her, so that he can keep whispering to her.) She falls asleep in his arms. He doesn't stop holding her, and he doesn't stop whispering. (Also, remember how the first thing he says to Sadie in Rule One is that she's warm and soft? Yeah, he still says that, pretty much verbatim, in this scenario. I'm not putting it in quotes, because it sounds dirty in a kidnapping context, but he for sure says it.)

The next day, since he's keeping up the comforting vibes to keep her from being afraid, Sadie asks Jasper a lot of questions. He tells her everything he knows about vampires. He isn't fully versed in vampire mating, so he isn't able to really inform her that his obsession with her is, to some degree, an inherent vampire trait, but he is very good at conveying to her that he is obsessed.

With no one to tell him to cool it with his power, and with his diet of human blood making his power more potent than it would be on animal blood, Jasper uses it at pretty much full capacity every time, instead of subtle shifts in emotion. So, while Sadie does notice that it's happening, she can't keep herself from the effects of his power by self-awareness alone.

He generally doses her with the same kind of peaceful calm he uses when he meets strange vampires for the first time, instead of the lethargic calm he uses to keep prey docile. He uses the latter when he wants her to sleep, but for the most part he just wants her to be unfearful and communicative.

She eats the food that's in the house. When he's able to convince himself to leave her unattended (usually after he's put her to sleep), he picks up more groceries and abducts some humans for himself. He keeps them in the cellar, far enough away from Sadie that she needn't know they're there but close enough that he can still hear her when he goes down to eat them. It's actually very convenient, not to have to hunt often; he just has to pop down to the cellar and enjoy a few of the already-injured occupants. Having a steady home has its upside. It's a shame someone will eventually notice the widow missing and he'll have to move with Sadie. But there will always be another empty mansion, or a mansion that can be easily made empty.

(When it's time to change homes, Jasper carries Sadie to the new destination while she's sleeping.)

Partially due to the mood control and partially due to the upfront-ness of everything, there's honestly very little tension between them. There's fear, sometimes (The one time Sadie tries to leave the mansion while Jasper is eating, he runs up from the cellar to stop her, and he's still covered in blood, and she's terrified, and it takes him a lot of soothing to get her calm again. It upsets him when she's scared.), but no tension. Sadie would like to leave, but she gathers that she can't, so all there is to do is maneuver within the new situation and learn more about her captor.

And neither of them is inherently a romantic. Jasper loves her, but even he isn't under the impression that they're dating or something. As far as he's concerned, he's keeping her; as far as she's concerned, she's studying him. Jasper is ecstatic with the arrangement, and Sadie is as comfortable as the situation allows.

Peter and Charlotte follow Jasper's scent at some point, wanting to hang out, and Jasper socializes with them outside the mansion, explaining that they can't go in because there's a human inside whom he is invested in keeping alive, and he can't risk them eating her. When they learn that he's in love, they ask if he plans on changing her, but he says that he can't yet. His control isn't good enough.

One day, Alice shows up.

She meets Jasper while he's in town, gathering food for Sadie and himself. They still have the little "You kept me waiting" "My apologies" flirtation, but he's a little more guarded, because he has to get back to Sadie, and as much as he is already beguiled by this weird-eyed stranger, he doesn't want her following him home. She's a vampire, and no vampires are allowed near his Sadie.

Alice really wants to skip the wooing; she's already seen herself with Jasper and Sadie. But she knows that mentioning Sadie too soon could make Jasper defensive, so she has to sprinkle herself slowly into Jasper's life, meeting him when he comes to town and letting his instinctive attraction and fondness for her grow into trust over a span of months (even moving towns when he does). She doesn't say anything about him switching to an animal diet, either; she tells him that she eats animals, but trying to influence him at this stage could alter her chances of seeing Sadie. Better to just let him murder.

Once they're at the right place, trust-wise, she tells him that she is already as in love with Sadie as she is with him, due to her psychic visions, and she asks to meet her. At first, Jasper isn't ready, but after she's asked a few more times, he allows it.

Alice has to be extra careful, because she wants to just run and hug Sadie as soon as she sees her, but if she makes a sudden move, Jasper will react badly. (Especially since the speed that comes with her small frame makes her a genuine threat to Sadie, even with Jasper there.) Not to mention, she has to endear herself to Sadie, whose only experience with vampires has been abduction.

"Sadie Lily Gilder," Alice says, barely restraining her excitement. "I am Alice Cullen. I'm your other soulmate."

Sadie is mostly perplexed and a little exasperated, but Jasper feels suddenly as if the sun has broken through the clouds. (Which means a lot, since he was already happy before.) Alice's joy at finally getting to see Sadie seems to fill the room, and this is his first time hearing Sadie's middle name, and...

"I like seeing you together," he realizes.

For the next few months, Alice is allowed to visit Sadie every now and then, under full supervision from Jasper. He can feel that she loves Sadie as much as he does, but he's still got to be careful. Humans are so fragile, and he's used to only trusting himself. When she comes, Alice brings Sadie little gifts that she never thought to ask Jasper before. She brings a new spritely energy to the house that Sadie comes to enjoy.

The following few months, (and after Jasper has watched her hunt animals) she's allowed to stay over full-time. They watch Sadie sleep, together. She's able to answer more of Sadie's questions.

Alice introduces Jasper to the idea of joining a family she's seen in their future. He doesn't want that many vampires around their Sadie, but as always, Alice says just the right things: they're all animal eaters; she hasn't seen a single future where any of them hurt Sadie; and the eldest of them could change Sadie for them.

(She also has to convince Sadie to want to become immortal with them, since she knows that Carlisle and Edward would be against turning her against her will. It helps that Sadie has been captured by a vampire for a while, now, and being a vampire herself would give her a chance of exerting some control over her future.)

When they meet the Cullens, Alice acts like they're already best friends. Jasper is more formal in asking the patriarch if he can change Sadie for them.

Edward calls them out on kidnapping Sadie, but Sadie points out that, unless things come to blows between the Cullens and Alice and Jasper, the only way for her to no longer be kidnapped is by becoming a vampire.

So Carlisle changes her, and she stays with the Cullens so that she can have someone to help her overcome her thirst during her newborn years without slipping up and hurting someone. Alice and Jasper stay with the Cullens, too (and the Cullens tell Jasper that he has to switch to the animal diet if he wants to stay). Eventually, all three of them are close enough to various members of the Cullen family that they just sort of become part of it.

Having been kidnapped at the start of all this, though, Sadie exerts her autonomy in pretty much every way. In her newborn years, in which she is more temperamental (though that isn't saying much; she's still pretty mellow by newborn vampire standards), she confronts Jasper for what he did, and he pretty much just takes it; things have worked out pretty great for him, so it's only fair to let her get it off her chest. Sadie can feel the bond between her and Alice and Jasper, but she can also feel that he didn't have to do what he did. She goes to visit her human family, once she knows that she won't eat them; she and Rosalie go on lengthy road trips; she and Emmett go to football games; she goes volunteering and home renovating with Esme; she learns languages and musical instruments from Edward; she learns vampire history from Carlisle and even joins him on a trip to Volterra.

She lets Alice buy her clothes but overall gives Jasper a wide berth.

Alice, having gained full trust from Jasper, is able to convince him to allow Sadie her space for a while, as she comes to terms with everything that happened. Jasper agrees, since Sadie isn't so fragile anymore and he knows that Alice is keeping an eye on her. So long as they know where Sadie is at all times, and so long as she is accompanied by at least one of the Cullens, he can bear to spend uninterrupted one-on-one time with his newest mate, especially if doing so will help Sadie to forgive him.

The diet of animal blood makes him less wild (but more tense, as he can feel that he is weaker), and the newness of everything in Sadie's life raises her spirits. Maybe eventually she'll be willing to hang out with him again, but it'll take a few years.

#rule one sadie #sadie lily gilder #yandere jasper hale #yandere alice cullen #male yandere #female yandere #yandere twilight #yandere poly #kidnapping #obsession #possessive #yandere/oc #black oc

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spaceskam · 3 years

Text

when you come home to me

Summary: Alex comes home for a few days and spends them in Michael’s bed.

Tags: bittersweet fluff, lost decade, implied sexual content

for the @malexremix here's a remix of @tkstrrand ‘s fic If the world was kind, he would stay.

ao3

Monday

Alex took a deep breath, hands squeezing the armrests of the airplane seat.

They’d just landed and he was just waiting for the clearance to get off the plane. Then he’d catch a cab to his dad’s house to pick up his car and he’d get to go home. He was crawling out of his skin with anticipation and nerves. He knew, logically, that he’d be welcomed back. But he always held a sliver of doubt. Alex was always just preparing himself to walk up to Michael’s airstream and find someone else in his bed.

He didn’t have insecurity around Michael’s bisexuality or anything. He wasn’t intimidated by the idea that Michael might choose to be with a woman because it’d be a simpler time while in Roswell. Honestly, anyone would be easier for Michael to date in Roswell. At least they’d be there full time.

Yet, he couldn’t shake his nerves. He’d gone too long without contact this time, he thinks. Three years. So much could happen in three years. Michael could’ve met someone and gotten married and had a kid and it would’ve been a socially acceptable timeline.

God, he really hoped he didn’t have a kid or a spouse.

The entire process of leaving the airport, watching a few of his fellow soldiers have a grand reunion with their family while he walked towards the doors alone, and riding home in a stuffy cab that smelled faintly of weed seemed to pass all too quickly and drag on painfully at the same time. He was as sure it’d taken his entire day as he was sure it’d been 15 minutes and he was about to fall on Michael’s doorsteps without the time to think of what to say.

The first sign things were going to go in his favor, though, was the fact that his dad’s house was empty. Alex knew his father knew when he was coming back to Roswell. Not that he deliberately went out to keep track of that date, but his dad always seemed to know everything that Alex did. Which would make sense considering his current CO was buddy-buddy with Jesse Manes. The fact that he wasn’t there, waiting to make it difficult for him to get to Michael’s, was a godsend.

Alex took a record-breaking run to his room. He grabbed his phone, his charger, a couple more items of clothing, and his keys and he was gone before his dad could even return.

Michael moved between Foster’s Ranch and the junkyard. He didn’t think about what it would mean if he was somewhere else. How would he find him if he wasn’t there?

Fortunately, he didn’t have to dwell on that disaster seeing as Michael’s truck was right where he left it in Sander’s junkyard. He took a breath and climbed out of his car at the same time Michael emerged from the door. He had to lean against the car as he got a good look at him.

He looked practically the same, maybe with a little more facial hair going on, but the shirt and the jeans were more of the same. Alex didn’t have to touch it to know how soft the fabric was from years of use. He didn’t have to feel Michael rub his stubbly cheek on parts of his body to know it’d leave a beard burn rash for a day or two after he left.

He wanted to feel it anyway.

“Alex,” Michael breathed, his eyes going a bit wide and his lips parting like he couldn’t quite believe it. That hurt more than Alex had the words for.

Alex pushed himself off the car and shoved his hands in his pockets, hoping to give his hands something to do while also keeping them to himself until Michael gave him the green light to do otherwise.

“Hey.”

Michael took each step down with his entire body weight, thud, thud, thud, like he didn’t know another way. It had Alex feeling nervous and excited and a billion other things.

“You’re back,” Michael said. Alex tried to smile, but it refused to find his face so he nodded and looked down.

“Temporarily.”

Michael was quiet for a moment, but he never stopped walking closer. He stopped just an arms-length away and Alex’s eyes trailed up him, trying to spot any difference. He didn’t really see any, only a few holes in his jeans that Alex longed to put his fingers through.

“How long?” Michael asked.

“‘Till Thursday,” Alex said, making that arms-length distance more like hands-width. Michael nodded slowly, his eyes betraying his thoughts and feelings. How that wasn’t enough, but he would accept it anyway. A twisted part of Alex basked in the fact that he was wanted at all.

Instinctually, Alex looked around the junkyard for any signs of life. Not that he was foolish enough to think that Sanders didn’t know something. More than once, he’d whistled for Michael like a dog instead of coming close enough to knock which Michael thought was hilarious and only happened “when you’re in my bed, Private, I think he’s got Spidey senses”. It was a little nerve-wracking, but Alex was able to convince himself that that didn’t mean Sanders knew it was him or knew what they were doing. There was reasonable doubt to be had. But. Still.

“Sanders is away, I’m looking after the yard for a while, no one’s around,” Michael whispered. Alex’s eyes drifted back to him and a smile finally found his face at the idea that they were completely alone. That meant he could convince Michael to stay in bed a little later in the morning. That meant he could get him to be a little louder. They could be a bit more comfortable in their own skin.

Michael moved until they were practically chest to chest, nearly stepping on Alex’s toes in the process. He wouldn’t have minded if he did, honestly. Michael reached up to grab his collar, tugging him in until they were nose to nose. He laughed softly, that tense knot of nervousness in his stomach exploding into pure excitement. For all the times he told himself he’d never come back to Roswell, this made it blatantly clear why he kept doing just that.

“Wanna go inside?” Michael murmured, tilting his head just enough to nudge his nose into Alex’s. Alex nodded quickly, feeling young and dumb and giddy for just a moment, and Michael smiled. God, he was beautiful.

Michael’s hand drifted from his collar down to his hand and he led the way into the airstream with Alex hot on his heels.

When the door closed, Alex started to unbutton his jacket. He expected frantic, desperate movement from both of them like usual, but Michael stopped and looked at him up and down for a moment. Alex grinned and slowed just a bit, just to tease. Michael rolled his eyes and leaned forward, his lips brushing Alex’s cheek in an experimental fashion. Something bigger than butterflies‒birds, maybe pterodactyls‒burst in his stomach at the small affection.

“Say ‘honey, I’m home’,” Michael asked against his cheek, voice quiet and unsure. Alex turned his head until they were nose to nose again and shucked off his jacket. It hit the floor and he didn’t give a shit about picking it up to fold it neatly.

Alex hooked his thumb into the hem of Michael’s jeans and tugged him in until they were pressed together from head to toe. He very much wanted to be pressed head to toe without their clothes between them. So he grabbed the belt buckle.

“Honey,” he said, breathy and not as sing-song as he was planning. Michael grinned anyway.

Alex yanked the belt out of the belt loops and Michael started to untuck Alex’s shirt, calloused fingers gliding over his stomach. Alex slowly started backing him further into the airstream towards the little bed that they’d made more happy memories in than Alex would ever tell anyone about. They were theirs. No one was allowed to taint them.

“I’m home.”

“You’ve been gone a while.”

Alex tried not to flinch at the simple statement, instead of letting his fingers trail over Michael’s skin. He had his ear against his heart and the soft, repetitive thud was soothing in more ways than he had the words for.

“I got a promotion, things have been kinda hectic,” Alex said, quiet and clinical in hopes Michael would drop the subject sooner rather than later, “We were traveling a lot.”

Alex managed a glance up at him and met his eyes, silently asking him to drop it if he could. That was an easier said request than done, but still. Michael rewarded him with a hand through his hair.

“Congrats,” Michael said dryly. Alex scooted a little closer, pressing up against his body in hopes that it’d subdue whatever was going on in his head. It was all he could do.

“Tell me about you,” Alex said, desperately changing the subject as he rested his head on Michael’s chest again. His heartbeat was a little louder, a little faster. Alex wanted to soothe that away somehow.

Michael’s arms wrapped around him.

“Isobel got married.”

“To Noah?” Alex asked, a smile tugging at his lips. He didn’t know the guy and he had mixed feelings about Isobel, but Michael loved her and he thought Noah was good for her and therefore Alex felt the same. “That’s great.”

“Mhm,” Michael agreed, craning his head down to search for a kiss. Alex moved to touch his face and deepened the kiss with ease.

This he could do. This he knew would make him relax. It always did. Maybe that was stupid and immature, but it felt good. It was an easy way to see Michael smile, to hear him laugh, to feel his skin turn red with adrenaline and excitement. And Alex knew he was the cause.

He liked being the cause of good things and so far making Michael feel nice was the only thing on that list.

Alex pulled him down into bed with him all over again, a silent promise to add a tally next to that one item on the list.

Tuesday

Alex slept in late for the first time in a long time, allowing himself to wallow in bed even after he knew there was no more going back to sleep.

He rolled and buried his face in the pillow before remembering that he wasn’t alone. A small smile found his face, still hidden away from the world in the comfort of the pillow and he reached out, feeling for Michael. However, the bed was empty and his smile was replaced with a pout. He lifted his head groggily and looked for Michael only to see him watching him from across the trailer.

“Come back to bed,” Alex whined, reaching out for him and forgetting himself for just a moment. He shouldn’t be whining and begging and using grabby hands towards anyone regardless of what they’ve done. Still. He did it. He quickly dropped his hand and evened his face once he remembered.

Michael seemed unphased by the slip-up, a big, warm smile on his face as he leaned against the counter. He was shirtless and had a pair of jeans on that were unbuttoned and hanging loose on his hips. Alex could follow the line of hair across his abdomen down to where it disappeared beneath his jeans. It made him feel warm all over again and he could feel himself forgetting his composure, wanting to just reach out and take.

“I will in a second,” Michael said softly.

Alex scrunched up his nose in distaste which got a huffed laugh out of Michael, but he quickly let it drop and he sat up. He reached across for where his bag was and pulled out a pair of clean boxers to put on and then threw on one of Michael’s shirts on top of it. It wasn’t as warm as the one he was wearing, probably, but it would simply have to do. And it really, really would do.

Michael came closer, finally, and sat beside him with two mix-matched mugs in his pretty hands. He handed one to Alex and adjusted himself to lean against the wall as Alex took a sip. He found himself staring into the cup almost too afraid to take another sip in case this was just something he made up in his head despite the warmth blooming in his gut at the taste.

“What?” Michael asked, taking a sip of what was most definitely coffee from the smell of it.

Alex turned his entire body to look at him, disbelief thrumming through his veins and a smile pulling at his lips.

“Since when do you drink herbal tea?” Alex asked, raising an eyebrow. He had at least one vivid memory of Michael choking and spitting it out when Alex had forced him to take just one sip.

And it turns out he didn’t and all of the disbelief in Alex’s system lit on fire into pure euphoria as Michael said he got it just for him. A small hope and faith that Alex wasn’t just fucking around with his feelings and dropping off the face of the Earth. Not just that, but spending his money on something for Alex. They didn’t really spend money on each other and this wasn’t necessarily expensive, and yet…

“Thank you,” Alex breathed, moving forward to kiss him again. Michael kissed him back and then took the mug from him to place on the counter beside his own. The taste of the coffee on Michael’s tongue definitely clashed with the tea, but Alex craved it.

The shirt he’d put on ended up on the floor and Michael grabbed his knees to pull him into his lap enough to lay him down. Alex felt high on him, on the idea that he bought him tea, on the fact that he wanted him to come back, expected him to come back. He held onto Michael’s back, tugging him in close and almost clawing at his back just to make sure this was real. That he was really here and they were really together if only for a moment in time.

“Ah,” Alex breathed, gripping him tighter as Michael’s teeth dug into the skin of his neck.

They seemed to have the same idea.

Wednesday

One day, when Alex had a house of his own, he was going to have an at-home library.

He didn’t have time for books much anymore, but the idea was still appealing and one day he wanted to have time for books. He wanted his walls to be lined with them, to have a full selection, to have the permanence of them. Michael, however, was already beating him at starting a collection.There wasn’t many in the grand scheme of things, but more than one should have in a living space so small, a stack of textbooks and non-fictional works on the table and a hidden pile shoved beneath the bed.

The whole thing had Alex feeling light and fluffy again despite the fact that Michael was working and Alex had to entertain himself this morning. It was just so cute. Alex took a shower and got dressed and when he got all ready for the day, he found himself staring at the stack. He carefully took the top one and started to thumb through it.

He objectively knew Michael was intelligent. He didn’t care what people said about mechanics, the shit was hard work and took more intelligence than he was sure anyone really knew. Even Alex really only knew how to change a tire. Michael, on the other hand, had built an entire engine.

Still, opening the old textbook to see it was flat-out mechanical engineering in the most clinical way was enough to make Alex feel warm with pride. All the highlights and notes in the margin felt so personal and the loose-leaf paper tucked into the practice problem pages screamed Michael Guerin. He was just so fucking smart. Alex liked him so much.

A few vocabulary words later‒and most notably a lot of notes on how to build a bigger, more powerful engine and an asterisk to remind him to compare to notes in his Rocket Propulsion textbook‒Alex found himself peeking behind the little curtain to see if he could spot Michael. And he did, seeing him wiping his hands as he spoke to a pretty woman who was probably a decade or so older than them. She was very clearly appreciative and Alex couldn’t help but snort a laugh.

Alex went back to the textbook, making himself comfortable in Michael’s bed. He had a secret, personal, debatably gross affinity for the way the blankets began to smell after they’d had sex a few times without washing them. It was gross, but they smelled a little musty and a little like Alex’s body wash and a little like Michael’s skin and a lot like they were a product of the two of them existing as one. He’d enjoyed the smell since the summer after high school when they were resigned to the bed of his truck with his sleeping bags. The idea of it pulsed in his veins.

He brought the blankets to his nose and kept reading.

“You’re dressed,” Michael noted when he came back inside. Alex managed to drop the blanket at the sound of the door opening in a casual motion, trying not to do anything distinctly weird. If Michael noticed he didn’t say anything, instead happily sitting on the bed in all of his sweaty, greasy glory and pulled Alex’s legs into his lap.

Alex glared at him and deeply buried the urge to see what his neck tasted like when he was this messy.

“It was getting cold,” he said simply as he put the book down.

“That’s what the blanket is for.”

“So, I was just meant to wait here for you, naked?” Alex teased, gravitating closer unintentionally. His eyes drifted to that spot on his tan neck, glistening with the heat of the day. A little bit of staring and he realized he left a mark.

Huh. That was a first.

“That was the plan, yeah,” Michael said. He grabbed Alex’s hand and held it tight.

Alex teased him and watched him closely, considering pulling him down and saying screw showers despite the fact that Michael desperately needed one before he put his hands anywhere sacred. Michael, however, noticed the book.

“Engineering,” Alex told him when he asked, “You’ve got lots of notes in here, you building something?”

Alex turned a few pages, that one reminding him to compare notes in his rocket science book unintentionally catching his eye again.

“Just cars,” Michael said, tone of voice a little more tense than it should be.

Alex met his eyes and stared at him. And for the first time in a long time when it came to Michael Guerin, Alex got that weird feeling in his gut that said he wasn’t telling the truth. Which would be ridiculous‒what the hell would there be to lie about?

Instead of letting himself sit with the idea, however, Alex tilted his head back and closed his eyes, shaking it out of his mind. They were having a good week. Alex was being paranoid for no goddamn reason. He rubbed his thumb over the back of Michael’s hand before shifting to lay his head on his shoulder. He didn’t smell like the sheets. He smelled like Michael. And Alex didn’t care that he was probably getting him dirty just by being near him.

“What’d you wanna do?”

“Can we just…” Alex said, breathing out as he considered the fact that Michael did actually have to bathe and that they did need to change the sheets after him sitting on them. He wasn’t quite ready to give up the potency yet. He could only have it for so long. “Can we just sit here for a bit?”

“Of course.”

Without meaning to, Alex dozed off. When he came to, the sheets were changed and smelled fresh, though still of Michael, and Michael was clean and tucked up against him. Alex was reminded by how much he liked clean Michael as well. He couldn’t tell if he liked him dirty or clean more.

It didn’t matter. Alex reached up to press his fingers against the mark that was much more visible when he wasn’t grimy and Michael, unconscious and endlessly sweet, moved closer.

He wondered how hard it would be to get Michael to cover him in marks, little reminders for just a few more days after he left. That was, however, extremely impractical and irresponsible given, well, everything about his job.

So instead he cuddled closer and held him and tried to memorize the way his body felt this close.

Thursday

“Do you remember the movie Cars?”

Alex blinked a few times as he registered the words coming out of Michael’s mouth. He was struggling to stay awake considering they’d spent the entire morning testing out the true meaning of stamina and destroying the concept of a post-coital recuperation period, hours dedicated to whiting out Alex’s mind from the inevitable departure that was coming closer with each passing moment. They were running out of time and Alex was much more content to not think about it or address it.

And Michael apparently wanted to talk about Cars.

“What?” Alex asked, lifting his head. Michael was laying in the opposite direction, his lips swollen and red and his hair a frizzy mess where it laid against Alex’s shin. His feet were on the wall to avoid being on the pillow.

“Cars, like the animated Disney movie?” Michael said.

“I-I mean, yeah, I remember Cars. Just, like, where did that come from?” Alex asked, huffing a laugh. He grabbed one of Michael's ankles and brought it to his chest, just needing to touch him.

“Remember when we watched it in Spanish senior year?” Michael continued. Alex nodded, watching him.

Michael seemed still a little dazed now that Alex’s eyes focused on him more. His fingers were playing with Alex’s leg hair and his eyes were half-lidded and the sun was shining even past the curtains, his tanned skin glowing. Alex had littered his skin in tiny red marks that he couldn’t ask for in return. He looked fucking godlike for a moment. Longer than a moment.

“Yeah, I remember we had a sub and she couldn’t figure out how the subtitles worked so we watched it in Spanish with French subtitles,” Alex said.

“You put your head down and your shirt rode up a little ‘cause of it. I sat there for, like, thirty minutes trying to figure out how to tell you that your shirt rode up and I could see, like, a millimeter of your boxers and an inch of your skin. It was nothing, really, but I remember feeling like it was the most scandalous thing I’d ever seen. And I stared at you the whole class period trying to work up the nerve to say something to you, anything, even if it was just saying I liked your shirt,” Michael rambled, his voice a little muffled against Alex’s leg. That didn’t stop Alex from feeling like his heart was going to jump out of his chest. “Anyway, if you could be in that universe, would you wanna be a living car or a living plane?”

Alex breathed a soft laugh, trying and failing to move past the part where he had just admitted something insanely sweet from a time months before they even really spoke one-on-one for the first time. Clearly, they needed to go at it like that more often. They didn’t tell stories like that. They didn’t talk about things that mattered.

To Alex, that mattered.

“Plane,” Alex whispered, slowly pushing himself to a sitting position and trying not to jostle Michael too much even if it felt awkward. Alex kissed his knee as he slowly took one of his legs back. “I like to fly.”

“You like to fly,” Michael repeated, soft like he was keeping it for himself. Alex smiled and slowly shifted one of his other legs away. Michael pouted adorably about it and Alex slowly made his way up his body.

“Yeah,” Alex said, fingers sliding over his thigh as he placed himself over Michael. The pout faded into something a lot more serene. “I did really well in flight school.”

“You have a pilot’s license?” Michael asked.

“Yeah. Air Force.”

“I’ve looked it up before, not everyone in the Air Force flies planes,” Michael said softly, reaching up to rake his fingers through his hair, “I didn’t know you did.”

“It’s a convenient thing to have and it was offered to us for free. So, you know, if we ever need to fly away, I can handle it,” Alex said. Michael stared at him for a moment. Maybe longer than a moment.

“Okay,” he said, pulling him down for a kiss.

It was languid and slow, the sun bearing down on them and making it hotter in the airstream than it already was from them alone. And Alex reveled in it. He wanted to soak in as much of this feeling in every way.

Because in twelve hours, he would be gone.

His flight was at five. He had to leave Michael by two so he could drop his car off at his dad’s and then he had to call a cab. And that would be it. He would be gone and he wouldn’t know when he would be back.

It was hard, leaving. Alex wanted so many things, all of them so out of reach, and his body ached for it. But he couldn’t have them. It wasn’t about what he wanted and, even though Michael seemed to want it too, Alex knew it was bad for them. It was messy and there were too many other players and it was best they stole this small time and didn’t make it harder than it had to be. They kept it physical and casual because it was what was best.

And yet.

Michael’s hand pressed to the base of his spine, a hot presence holding him close. He touched every inch of skin he could and he kissed him like it was important. Michael kept tea for him and put off work to be here. He hadn’t looked at his well-loved notebooks since Alex got here. His attention was on Alex. All of it. He was wanted here. Alex loved the way that felt.

He loved him.

It was almost torturous how something could be literally in his hands and simultaneously entirely out of reach. The silly game Alex played with himself, letting himself get all excited about going home because he wanted to see him while reminding himself that there was no guarantee that Michael was waiting. There was no promise made. Hell, they barely spoke about things unless they were trivial to make sure they didn’t make things worse.

And he loved him.

Alex didn’t have to ask if Michael was seeing other people when he was gone, he knew he was. He was handsome and smart and hardworking despite what he’d have others believe. He knew one day he’d come home and Michael wouldn’t be open to letting him in his bed. He’d find someone nice, someone cozy, someone safe. Someone who didn’t keep him waiting around. It was only a matter of time. It was stupid to care too much.

But Alex loved him.

They didn’t start another round this time, bodies too fraught and fried and tired to try. Instead, they kissed until the kissing stopped and they just held each other. The sun was shining on them, the clock was ticking, and Michael’s skin was sticking to his with sweat from how hot it was but neither of them was bold enough to move.

And Alex loves him.

Friday

Alex let out a shaky breath as he watched the clock tick to 1:45 AM.

He’d run out of time. Michael was laying on his back, sound asleep with his head leaning towards Alex. It hurt to look at him, but Alex mustered enough courage to touch his face carefully and push his hair back. He kissed his forehead and then his cheek, watching to make sure he didn’t stir, and then slowly got out of the bed that had been so nice to him these last few days.

Alex gathered his things quietly, putting on his shirt and his pants and his shoes. He grabbed his phone and his keys and held them tightly to muffle any excess noise. His heart felt like it was going to melt out of his chest as he looked at him. Apparently, all the touching didn’t help him feel ready to leave at all.

God, it hurt. It hurt so fucking bad.

Alex closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He didn’t tell Michael when his flight was or when he was leaving out of self-preservation. He didn’t trust himself to leave if Michael was awake. And yet it still felt like the hardest thing.

Beside Alex’s bag was a soft, worn black sweater. The sleeves and the neck were stretched out. It smelled like Michael. Alex found himself pulling it over his head despite it still feeling a little hot in the airstream. He wanted to keep something, just this one thing, just for a little while.

Quickly, to make himself feel less embarrassed about it, he opened one of Michael’s notebooks to leave a note. He had a million things to say. He settled on something simple.

Borrowed your sweater, it was cold hope that’s okay.

I’ll give it back next time I’m home

- AM

He started at it and swallowed, trying to make sure it was enough. Maybe he could smother it in tiny hearts or find something to make a kiss print with or something. Something that would let Michael know that he loved him even though that wasn’t an option. He couldn’t think of anything worthwhile, though, and instead just flipped it over.

I’ll be back, I promise

Alex took another deep breath and looked at Michael again, mentally saying fuck it as he leaned back down to kiss him on the cheek and breathe in the smell of his hair. It was intoxicating. He wanted to crawl back into bed with him. It was so much better than being out there, running special operations because he was talented. That’s what he was told. Talented. We need you, do you really need a vacation right now? You’re important. Your decryption is incredible and needed. Fine. Five days, but then you need to come back. Captain.

Five days.

“I’m going to come home,” Alex murmured, standing up straight. He swallowed the lump in his throat and found a tack in a small cup of screws and other pointy things, sticking the note where Michael would see it.

This wasn’t it. He was going to come back. Maybe Michael would be with someone more permanent by then and maybe this was the last time he’d get to kiss him. And that would be fair and Alex wouldn’t complain.

But maybe not. And maybe he’d have more of him in his future. More talks. More anecdotes about liking Alex.

More. They could have more one day. This wasn’t over.

Alex got in his car and drove.

#malex #malex fic #micahel guerin #alex manes #roswell new mexico #my fic #malexremix2021

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wolvesandpetals · 3 years

Text

Loki x Sylvie Songfic: Tonight my dear, the end of time. For Sylki week: Day 2: Song lyrics. @sylkiweek

Song: End of time by Lacuna Coil.

(Masterlist of my Sylki fanfiction can be found here.)

---

"You've built your life above the sin. You hold my hand before the end comes, Forgiving me, For what I've done 'till the end of days."

[[MORE]]

It's the end of the world. Or the end of this world, at least. He has left them stranded at this dying planet through a series of unfortunate accidents that could have been avoided if only he had been more careful.

Perhaps this is what he deserves for all the evil he has ever committed- the slaughter of innocents, some by his own hands, the destruction of New York- and everything he, or the version of him in the Sacred Timeline TM, is yet to do- including the events that lead to the death of his own mother.

Yes, this is a just punishment for his crimes, indeed.

There is a loud boom in the background that pulls him out of his contemplation and into the harsh present. Debris are falling across the purple sky, like leaves in autumn that have lost their right to leave. They fall into the ground in the distance, shattering houses and barren lands alike, and in the lake in front of them that has stilled, as if in terror. Sylvie sits motionless, the reflection of the death and destruction in her iris scaled down to a ridiculously miniscule size, as if it is insignificant.

She looks at him and offers him a tiny smile, and it is indeed insignificant, everything around them. The look in her eyes says something soft, something warm, like she sees him for who he is, like she sees his sharp edges and knows those are not the edges of a blade forged to kill, but that of a broken glass- beautiful in its entirety, but cruelly drawing out the blood of those who dare to break it.

If he believed in earthly religions, he would say the look in her eyes was like a message from Heaven, declaring the forgiveness of his sin, granted in his last moments.

She gently touches his arm.

---

"'Cause I belong to you, 'Cause I am part of you. I am dying in your arms. It's time to go, I can make it through"

He looks down at where her skin meets his. It's a simple, innocent touch, yet it speaks entire libraries worth of words in a language that he has never known before

She is very similar to him, but not an exact replica, like how a mirror flips one's silhouette and every single feature. She is similar enough for him to know what she feels, yet differs in her thoughts and actions.

Her grip grows tighter, and she reaches for his hand. She decides to fight, to change the fate of Lamentis-1, to use every bit of the magic in her to deflect the pieces of the moon, force in into a new trajectory, forge a new path for it. She intertwines their fingers until they are one, and the timelines that were forcefully bound into one start branching out again.

---

"I've come to realise, Tonight my dear The end of time Is not so far away. We cannot pray To save our lives"

They are Lokis. They survive. Even when they have no aces up their sleeves, they find the opportunity to steal one from the hands of the enemy. They are not giving up.

But in the silence of the elevator, the aura of defeat is prominent. They steal glances at each other, committing it to memory, so when the time comes to draw the last breath, it is not wasted on hatred.

There's a clenching in her stomach she cannot quite explain. It's different from her first time in his wretched prison. The fear and hatred is constant, but it is mixed with something that tastes like the salty teardrops shed during a farewell.

The collars on their necks are tight, the shackles on their hands without a key. The urge to pull a Houdini is strong, and they keep the hope that they might find a worthy assistant yet.

The door opens, revealing the path to the timekeepers, to the end of the road for them.

---

"I can feel you And I think that Everything you wanted in me Was the mirror of your dreams. But I couldn't believe what you'd say."

It has all been a lie. There never were any Timekeepers. She has done what she had set out to do, and all she has to show for is are the disembodied heads of the androids at her feet.

She doesn't know where to go from here.

He is standing in front of her, with his hands on her shoulders, his eyes on hers, his breathing uneven, leaving her heart dancing like an unruly tornado in her ribcage, making debris out of the walls she has built over the centuries.

She understands, at least a part of it. She feels it surging through her bloodstream too.

This is new for her as well, and dread accompanies the hope. Uncertain of what he would say, she stares at him, as the pruning stick finds its way into his core, and he starts fading right in front of her.

---

"As I belong to you, My flesh and blood in you. I am burning in this fire. It's time to go, I can't make it through"

She understands it fully now. While the timelines found a way to split into two, giving rise to two Lokis, they also found a way to tangle them together with this bond between them, unite them into one.

She has one good memory- the memory of him serenading her on the doomed train in Lamentis-1. When she sings, she sings "Come home".

Neither of them have a world they can call home anymore, or a place in the timelines. But her mother always told her "Home is where the heart is", and she finally knows where their hearts are.

She is going to bring him home.

Sylvie prunes herself.

---

"I'm coming home again And now I know where I belong. Reeling from my instincts 'Cause I realize I'm not alone"

She has lived in apocalypses, watched people go on with their lives unaware of the danger that would soon befall them, watched them cower together in fear as they pray for a miracle, and watched them fight each other in the vain hope of finding a safe passage out of death's jaws.

This world has no such sight.

This world is empty, dead, cold. She is all alone as far as her eyes allow her to see, the sense of loneliness amplified by the lack of her variant by her side. Something roars in the distance, something purple and dangerous and grander than she is. This is its home, its hunting ground, and she is his prey.

So is he.

She is determined to find him, to save him, to make sure neither of them is alone anymore.

---

"I've come to realise, Tonight my dear The end of time Is not so far away. We cannot pray To save our lives"

She pulls the flimsy green blanket closer, like it can shield her from the dangers around. She used to camp out in Roxxcart with stolen electronic devices and watch movies from various eras. She has seen many scenes where the hero and the heroine have a little picnic in a garden, lying on a blanket under the blue skies, feasting on delicacies.

The sky is far from blue, the patch of grass barely resembles a garden, the blanket thin, and the lack of food apparent by the growing pang of hunger in her stomach.

But the feeling in her chest is the one she imagines the heroine experiences when her hero presents her with a flower as a token of his affection.

Flowers wither and die. She has never adorned her hair with floral crowns, choosing metals instead. She prefers things which are strong, lasting.

She prefers everything he is. She prefers the daggers he conjures for her, to be used in this upcoming battle.

They are at the end of time, having run out of it. She is determined to protect him at all costs, but there's a high probability that one or both of them may not make it out of this alive.

Yet, as the end approaches, all she can think of is the possibility of a new beginning.

---

"I've come to realise, Tonight my friend The end of time It's not so far away. We cannot pray To save our lives"

The purple cloud turns green. Alioth the devourer is tamed, their magical collar wrapped tightly around its neck.

The cloud parts, making the citadel visible.

This is it. They are about to confront The one at the end of time, the puppet master.

Loki's grip on Sylvie's hand tightens.

It's time to cut the strings.

#loki disney+#loki x sylvie #sylvie x loki #sylki #pro sylki #fanfiction #sylki fanfic #sylki week

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jewels2876 · 3 years

Text

Always. - A LOKI finale synopsis

So I thought I could write something magical or be inspired by the Loki finale for @the-th-horniest-book-club as it's their last day of celebration.

And it hit me. I can't.

Here's what I can do: dissect this episode down to its heartbreaking ending because at the end I still have a million questions and it's gonna take a cartoon What If?, a Spiderman movie, maybe a Hawkeye show?, and a Dr. Strange movie to answer them all and I'll STILL have questions after that.

Consider for just a moment what happened to 2012 Loki when the TVA captured him way back in Episode One - what the hell did removing Loki do to the MCU timeline? Thor: The Dark World never happened. And no I don't mean you can pretend Marvel put it out there because they did, and it's one of the worst Marvel movies, there I said it. But if TWD didn't happen, what else could have been affected?

And with that disturbing thought we begin...

The opening credits HAVE AUDIO! Every tag line uttered as the characters flash on the screen, EVEN LOKI gets his "We have a Hulk" in. It is awesome; it is glorious; it is expected with EVERY Marvel creation going forward.

Loki and Sylvie should know better than to stare at a door; they always seem to open on their own when that happens. Miss Minutes pops up out of nowhere, scaring the bejesus out of 70% of people, the other 30% wanted to see her one last time. And she's not the same Miss Minutes we first met. She's edgy, she's less peppy, and she gives our duo an offer. Honestly, she should have known the result but 🤷🏻‍♀️

Ravonna is doing something in her office; if she's cleaning it's a piss poor job. Miss Minutes shows up and tells Ravonna she gave her what she needs. Ominous.

Back to Loki and Sylvie who finally meet "He Who Remains." Now we all know guys with names like "He Who Must Not Be Named" are bad news. Guys, to answer the question asked in the show, I'm a little disappointed. The disappointment lasts about five seconds... The office they get transported to reminds me IMMEDIATELY of a certain movie and certain buildings we've seen before (insert duh at this point because you too have seen every Marvel movie ever.)

****** Side note: anyone know if Tom takes his tea with only two sugars? No? Yes? Okay getting back to other things ******

At this point, we get back to Ravonna and her lack of cleaning when Mobius shows up with the pruner (it has to have a cooler name! side side note: nope just glowing batons) and we get a nice little flashback to Original Ravonna (maybe?)

****** 2nd side note: since when did everyone who's not a Russo brother start using OHIO for origin stories? Seriously, go watch Black Widow. I'll wait.******

Now back to Loki, Sylvie, and He Who Remains, hereto known as HWR, who pulls the same trick we saw in the first episode with the "read and sign" guy with the adorable kitten. HWR needs a kitten, a pet at the very least. "You can't get to the end until you've been changed by the journey." HWR s is winding up for a pitch and also summarizes the show too. Loki asks if it's a manipulation; HWR finds the word interesting and I do to. Here's why:

Odin manipulated Loki's abandonment to his advantage

Thanos put Loki under mind control and used him

This is the 2012 Loki as a reminder, so he hasn't been subjected to imprisonment on Asgard or the brotherly banter/squabbles he and Thor have escaping Asgard, nor “Get help” from Ragnarok so it should come as no shock that Loki looks angry. After all, Odin and Thanos kind of killed any hope in Loki of feeling wanted or needed. Aren’t father figures supposed to instill hope, instead of disgust? Yeah, I can answer that one but that’d be an entire other post.

Now we’re back to Ravonna and Mobius and they spat over who was more betrayed - news flash: it was Mobius. But Ravonna has to do for the digs. “Those variants?” “You threw it away for a couple of Lokis.” Mobius tries to reason with Ravonna, sounding exactly like Glenda and Elphaba from Wicked (his “together” is spot on Glenda!) Ravonna opens a portal looking for “free will” after giving Mobius one last beatdown.

And we’re back to Loki, Sylvie and HWR. HWR gives them a bit of his backstory; I have a suspicion he’s glossed over some of it (he admits being called a conqueror for cryin’ out loud!) He has a maniacal moment, standing on his desk, voice getting a little shrill and thin. He also admits he’s probably the saner of his variants (my words not his.) Then after his real-man-behind-the-curtain routine he makes them an offer. Take his place. Loki, who has been remarkably non verbal, asks why HWR would give up control. Good question from the guy who wants to be in control yet was meant to thrive on chaos he creates. If anyone is keeping score, questions have been asked but not a single ANSWER has been given! Sylvie isn’t believing a single word while our Loki’s wheels are turning.

****** 3rd side note: the acting has been PHENOMENAL this entire series. Forget what Marvel promised and didn’t deliver (fluid Loki) and a scene we’ll be getting to, Tom and company have been nothing short of an Emmy, which I expect next year.******

HWR finally gets fed up with Sylvie and tells her to grow up. Because she took her pruning personally. Now I’m not going to say she shouldn’t be upset about her pruning; Marvel made it A POINT of showing her playing, content on Asgard, when they took her. But HWR has a point. He’s offering an option that allows Loki and Sylvie to do whatever they feel is best and it’s the wrong time for Sylvie to get in her feelings. Of course 99% of us know that’s EXACTLY when feelings choose to surface.

Then something happens - we don’t know who or what did it. Was it Ravonna and her leaving? Did Ravonna meet someone we suspect? Was it Mobius? Miss Minutes? The agents? We may never know exactly but now HWR is actually in the dark. Mr. Know-It-All suddenly doesn’t know it all.

Sylvie thinks she has her opportunity to fulfil her quest but it’s our Loki who protects HWR. Loki doesn’t tell her she’s wrong or right, just to stop and THINK. And now we get a glimpse of 2018 Loki:

See the bigger picture

Let’s talk about it

I believe HWR

What fills the void of a dictator?

What if we unleash something worse than HWR?

Now here’s where Marvel gets an B+ in character development. They took the 2012 Loki hell bent on destroying Earth to rule it and gave him just enough growth to become the 2018 redeemed Loki ODINSON, willing to sacrifice himself to Thanos (even if he did think he wouldn’t die.) It’s not a perfect arc by any means, but Marvel got there and this is one thing I applaud.

Sylvie now thinks Loki is lying to her to get to a throne and is clearly upset they are not seeing eye to eye on this and another point to Marvel. Loki, for only seeing a few videos that Mobius showed him, still has more life experience in his SINGULAR moment with Thanos to know that there is ALWAYS something bigger, badder, WORSE around the corner and he does NOT want to make the wrong decision. Wow.

To trust or not to trust.

It’s a beautiful sword fight that HWR sits back and watches like it’s ESPN. The lighting is gorgeous behind the action and is leading up to my next OMG moment: STOP.

Loki asks Sylvie to stop, almost like a child. Like someone who knows exactly where the fight leads, where it goes, and where it ends. And he says as much to her as well. Sylvie feels like that person who just wants the fight to be over; she hunches into Tom’s space and the lighting suddenly stays green and blue. Guess who’s green? Guess who is blue?

This goes back to my Emmy mention. Even if it’s ONLY for technical work, it’s so deserving. Sylvie, in green, tired, emotional, struggling with something we aren’t supposed to know just yet. Loki, in blue, almost as if his Jotun form has taken over, strong, sensible, relatable, empathetic.

And then that damn kiss! Marvel missed another opportunity here. Two Lokis had the opportunity to show self-love, familial love, friendly love, ANYTHING BUT A DAMN KISS!!! I’m not saying they couldn’t have feelings for each other, but it NEVER has to be romantic just because it’s a guy and a girl. **dramatic sigh goes here**

Sylvie pushes Loki through a portal she has opened, then turns to stab HWR through the chest, as he predicted. HWR actually chuckles, which makes me wonder if he expected this exact turn of events. As if we’ll ever know for sure.

Of course the timeline is going nebular and we’re treated to a shot back to the TVA. Mobius and B-15 exchange words as they watch the timelines grow and grow. Loki is sitting on a couch at the TVA and decides he’s not done? You’re supposed to guess the motivation because everything seems normal at the TVA. Loki finds Mobius and B-15 and admits to everything. Loki calling HWR terrifying is terrifying all on is own. And this of course is where it ends.

The post credit scene is just a “Loki returns in Season Two.”

Guys, this season was a mixed bag. There was some good, there was some not so good; there were laughs and a couple of tears. But it also has me SO HYPED for what’s to come. More Loki, more Marvel content, more... everything, I hope!

#loki spoilers #loki tv spoilers #loki #sylvie

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thebadchoicemachine · 3 years

Note

For the writing prompt, what about ghost!Robin and Catboy!Corpse seeing present day Cornelius/Dream? Like Dream being confused and happy about his Partner and Son’s Ghosts being there and everyone else being v confused about the two random people calling him Cornelius and knowing him from a hundred years ago.

anon im so sorry. This has been sitting in my inbox for months now but I just cannot finish this story. it a really cool idea though. Here’s my incomplete first draft. I just copy and paste it from my wip to here so this is it, notes and cuts and typos and all.

The idea is Karl shows up when they’re in the prison and they see the false timeline where Cornelius was a killer and are forced to accept he sucks

_________________

- The execution cell was supposed to be merciful, a more civilized solution than being beat to death, but everything about it made Robin gag. He hoped he would never ever end up in it.

tw: implied indirect suicide, major death but they’re ghosts(?)

--•-•-*-•-•--

Colors and colors and colors wouldn’t stop melting and mixing and swirling. They surrounded him. They were in him. They were him. He breathed them in without breathing, he bled them without blood, he was falling and flying and stood completely still.

And then it was dark. No, then it was light. White and clean like the marble of a palace Robin knew he would never get to see.

Where... where was he? He’d won hadn’t he? They’d... killed... him. They’d killed everyone.

He wanted to die. He had to. There was boiling in his blood he couldn’t ease, he had to die, he needed them to hate him. To end him. The Jester’s Curse. Cursed to be wronged, to be hurt, to be freed.

He’d always had it, as far as he was concerned. He didn’t know why he resisted for so long. Perhaps, despite everything, he’d enjoyed living at one point. Despite what he was, despite his curse, despite bring a jester, he wanted to live! At some point he couldn’t care less about tricking others into condemning him to the grave.

After Cornelius, after Cat, he didn’t even fight it nor could he fight for it. He didn’t even care. Even as the ground swallowed him up in flames of the execution he held no harmony. No peace. There was no joy in his victory, there was no meaning to his death. Even in fulfilling it, he’d denied his curse.

That’s why he was still here, wasn’t it? Jesters want to die, they want to transform, to be released into vengeful spirits of lies and trickery. He was... dead. He was also... still here... why? He knew why. He didn’t think he liked the answer.

Robin couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t stand to bother mourning anymore. Not himself, not his long-dead family, not his new fath- he choked. He didn’t know know on what, he had no air, no lungs. He just couldn’t finish the thought.

“We never did make it official, did we?” A solemn, comforting, voice rang out.

Robin spun around. No. What? No, it’s not. It is. He is. Right there. Standing- no, not standing. Neither of them can stand. Not floating either just… there… was Cat.

Robin felt his eyes fill up with tears, he didn’t know how, he didn’t care. He flew into his friend’s arms.

“Woah! Ah, be careful, child.”

“H-how,” Robin sobbed into his chest. “How are you…”

“You’re here, aren’t you?”

“I th-thought that was because of my c-curse.”

Cat sighed, gently ruffling the child’s hair.

“No,” he spoke, finally. “I don’t think that’s why any of us are here.”

“Then-”

“No, I don’t think it’s what happens to everyone either. I’ve been alone as far as I can tell. I haven’t found anyone else. Not even…” he sighed again.

Robin understood. Cornelius was gone.

“I’m so sorry, Robin.” Cat tightened his grip. “I’m so sorry for what we put you through. We promised we would give you a better life, a safer one, but we left you in the worst way possible. You were executed because... because of me.”

“Oh,” Robin stared down at his feet. “You... were there for that?”

“No. I wasn’t- I can’t- I don’t know how to explain it, I only know what happened. Exactly what happened. It was like living a story being told to you, as though a nar- narrating...

Narration. Something clicked in both of their minds. Wasn’t there some strange… the spirals… the colors… he didn’t have a name, not one he ever told them. He had simply showed up one day, right before it all began. He wasn’t there, not properly anyway,. but he was there. He was there in the backs of everyone’s minds. He was there as he explained away every awful thing like it was a footnote in a novel. He was there as he made and told truth. He was the Narrator.

He had such an air of control, such an air of change.

Thoughts (memories?) of a past that never happened flashed through Robin’s mind. Cat was out investigating, Robin was carefully looking over his medical supplies. He couldn’t risk- NO. No. He swept the distraction from his mind. He wouldn’t get carried away, not this time.

The narrator. The Narrator. He had a book. A swirling and swishing mash of colors cover on his book he scribed all their horrors into. That’s where they were.

“Cat, we need to go. He made a mistake. This… was his first time. We are not supposed to be here. We were never meant to leave. We should try to get out.”

Cat only nodded. Robin didn’t know why he understood or how deeply, but he did. This was a mistake.

The two began wandering the halls. It was strange, being able to think and move again as though his body was still his. To have his mind and thoughts working in a stream of consciousness instead of a thick muddy bog of echos. If he didn’t know any better he’d describe it as feeling more… alive.

He even reached out to guide Cat out of habit. How amazing was it that he had habits again? Cat allowed him to because he knew the comfort it gave him to have something so familiar. Although, of course, not really needing him to. They were both still dead, spirits, memories. Living- not living like this, detached, was like existing with a million tiny radars reaching out all around you. It wasn’t a matter of seeing or feeling, simply knowing. When you were so disconnected from life and itself you were able to get a much clearer and instant idea of the world, he supposed.

They walked and wandered in silence for a while. At least, a while from their perspective. Even with no real idea what or where they were Robin could tell time was… off… here.

Eventually, they found their way out. There was no exit or pathway they walked through nor was it a sudden jump. They had just… made it out. They were standing beneath the shelter of some trees. It was raining. They were surrounded by unfamiliar structures and landscapes. Of course they were, but this wasn’t just some distant biome or kingdom it was…

“Robin? Are you alright?”

“I- yes. I’m fine, Cat. This is- I mean, that place is just… wow.”

“It’s... different, yes. This rain is- hmm, it’s weird. I can’t feel it but I know it’s there. It’s making everything fuzzy.”

Robin stuck his hand out. The raindrops sizzled against his skin. He was so focused on the odd sensation he jumped when Cat yanked his arm back.

“What was that? Are you alright?”

“The rain, it stings.”

“Badly? Are you hurt?”

“Not really. It feels like I’m a bar of soap being whittled down by the drops but I’m fine. It only feels strange.”

“Oh, good,” Cat breathed a sigh of relief. “In that case, let’s keep moving.”

Robin agreed. They didn’t have anywhere to go but neither felt like standing under the tree for all eternity. Besides, they were in a whole new world, maybe even a whole new dimension, and Robin was really curious to see what was with those strange building

It all seemed impossible.

His breath was taken away at every turn as they walked. Structures like nothing he’d ever seen before. There were so many colors, so many shapes, so many mechanics, so many things, and all so high and huge. It was amazing.

“Slow down a little, this rain is really disorienting.”

“Sorry! Sorry, this place is just… wow.”

“So you’ve said,” Cat laughed. “What exactly is so amazing about it? Describe it to me.”

“Well, there’s so much of it. It’s like a town but nothing like a town at all. More like a whole kingdom. A very strange kingdom. There’s no uniform to it, every build is unique. There was a castle we passed, it was huge and had so many colors! There were just rainbows and rainbows pouring out of every-”

“Mmm, interesting.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“This castle though, it felt like regret, didn’t it?”

“Y-yeah? Kinda,” Robbin had been trying to avoid thinking about that, how he could feel every building. “Uh, over to your side there is a pit, a giant crater bigger than our entire town! It’s tragic. It’s refreshing a little. It’s kind of…”

“Familiar. I- I don’t want to be near that, Robin. Let’s keep moving.”

Robin didn’t agree. He wanted to get closer, to feel what was so sad, so new, so ended, what about whatever tragedy there was familiar. He wanted to understand what he knew would hurt him, and why.

*****

“No! He would never!” Cat’s voice was rising. It was honestly scary, Robin had never seen him so wrathful. “He is the kindest person you will ever know! He is a protector! He’s- he is-”

“Do you really believe that?” The Narrator asked, calm and unfazed, sorrow creeping into his question. Robin couldn’t shake it from his mind. His thoughts were ruffles like pages flipping backward in a book. Like a pencil rubbing revealing words erased and undone but that had still been written. He was sent back to his flashing memories, his lies, unable to stop them.

Cat was out investigating, Robin was carefully looking over his medical supplies. He couldn’t risk choosing wrong tonight. He’d been right to focus on himself. No, he’d been lucky. He’d panicked. Cat was out to the town now. Robin was out now. The killers knew they could stop them, they would be targets. The killers…

Part of him wanted to ignore it, to go back to thinking it couldn’t be one of them. That no one would do something like that, that is must be some outside force but Jimmy… they’d gotten him right. Robin winced at the memory of Helga, at how it had almost been him, but they’d gotten Jimmy right. He knew they had, the Narrator said so.

The next morning, no one had died. Robin hadn’t needed to heal anyone. Cat reported Jack hadn’t left his home. It seemed like, well, it must be Jack. It just had to be, didn’t it? Robin frowned. He liked Jack enough, he didn’t want to kill anyone. He didn’t want to be wrong again but what choice did he have?

Jack was fighting. He was shouting, angry, scared. He was in the exact same place Robin had been a few nights ago. The familiarity burned inside his chest. He couldn’t stand any more of this, it needed to end tonight.

“IT’S CORNELIUS! IT’S HIM! IT HAS TO BE! Look at me. Look at me! You know me, I’m simple, I farm potatoes. If Helga was still here she’d remind yall I ain’t good for much else. You really think I could do this?”

Robin couldn’t comprehend what he was hearing. He wanted to believe it. He wanted to spare everyone he could but… Cornelius? Could he really condemn him any more than he could Jack? Could he any less?

“What makes you think it’s me and not one of them? I know you’re a killer, Jack. You guessed Cat would be on your trail tonight and didn’t kill. Why else wouldn’t someone be dead today?” Cornelius’s voice was as calm and upbeat as ever, if not a bit exasperated.

“He’s smart! He’s too smart. Look at his freaky, calculatin’ eyes, if you can ever see them. Look at him! Hiding behind that mask, wearing that ridiculous green hood, what’s that smile for, huh? None of us should have trusted him the day he set foot in this town, make up for it now. C’mon! Cat, I know you’re better than murderin’ folks for mayhem. Bob, you’re as simple as me! Robin,” Robin froze up as he was addressed directly “You’re a child, a sweet one. I’m sorry you have to live through this. I’m sorry you’ve been where I am now but I only hope that gives you the empathy you need to make the right choice. It’s him. I swear it’s not me!”

Everything felt stifled. He muffled the distraught protests of Cat in favor of listening to his own. No. No, it couldn’t be. Everyone in town used to be friendly but Cornelius was a friend. He and Cat had been there for Robin. They’d taken him in, cared for him, treated him as their own son. Well, Cat had.

Robin slowly blinked. What had Cornelius done for him? Thinking this way made him sick but he needed to be rational here. Did he really believe Cornelius was innocent, truly? He trusted Cat. Cat had proof he was safe, even if he wasn’t an investigator he had years and years of kindness to back him up. What did Cornelius have, really? He was kind, decent enough, but so was Jack. So were Jimmy and Helga. That wasn’t something he could base his vote on.

So what did make him so sure it wasn’t Cornelius? The only… he realized the only thing holding him up was Cat. Cat loved him. Robin wanted that to be enough. He wanted desperately to go back home, to lay in Cat’s lap while Cornelius told them stories. He wanted to retreat into his memories but when he tried they felt corrupted, tainted, hollow.

Every time he tried to imagine the kind way Cornelius had ruffled his hair, how he’d giggle and blush after a kiss from Cat, how he’d take off his mask at home and join Robin sitting on the porch, every time he tried to lose himself in the memory of that soft, humored, smile he was frozen inside by the eyes. Even when they were sad or kind his eyes were always vibrant, sharp… calculating.

Robin took a shaky breath. He didn’t like this, he didn’t want to do this, any of it. He was filled with a numb resolve as he cast his vote. He had no proof either was innocent but he had no reason to believe Jack was capable of this… he knew Cornelius was.

“The voting has finished,” The Narrator began. “Jack... Jack is the most suspected but this means nothing. Cornelius, by 3/5ths of the vote you have been found guilty. Please, step into the chamber.”

“NO!” A scream cut through the faux memory, just barely. Just enough for Robin to hear it. Who had yelled? Cat? Cor- Dream? Himself? He didn’t know, he was still lost.

Lost… Robin was so lost. 3/5ths. Cornelius obviously voted for Jack and vice versa, Bob was on Jack’s side, Cat must have voted for Jack even if only to save his love. Robin had been the deciding vote. What had he done? Was he right? Cornelius gave him no answer as he calmly stepped into the cell. The Narrator blabbed on, explaining the votes and who and what but for the first time since the colorful stranger arrived Robin couldn't listen to a word he said, instead focusing on Cat.

Cat had run to the jail, his hands reaching desperately through the bars. “I didn’t want this. I didn’t want this,” he kept repeating. His voice was calm and low but Robin could tell that was desperate. He was putting on an act, trying to reassure Cornelius as though it would all solve itself if he just kept together. Cornelius still didn’t speak. He took Cat’s hand and rested it on his face, under his mask.

Then the grate snaped close and Cat was forced to pull his hand back. He barely moved though, pressing his hands against the wire through the bars. Cornelius pressed his hand up from the other side. Maybe Cat could feel it, maybe he couldn’t, Robin didn’t know which he preferred.

Part of Robin wanted to put him to back away, to warn him the bars and fence was there for a reason, but the rest of him knew he couldn’t. The least- the only thing he could do was allow Cat this brief moment of closure, if you could even call it that.

Cornelius still kept silent, for just the briefest of moments Robin hated him. How dare he? How dare he sit there, keeping Cat suffering in silence? How dare he keep Robin in this horrid suspense? How dare he not admit his crimes or keep pleading his innocence? How dare he… how dare… then Robin heard Cat whimper and the anger was gone.

“We’re gonna get you out of here, okay? We-”

“Well, that’s not gonna happen,” The Narrator laughed, almost callously. If he wasn’t so detached from the world, so different from them he felt innocent even in cruelty, Robin might’ve felt like spitting on him. He couldn’t though, he was different. He was detached. He was like a child who didn’t know any better than to hurt others’ feelings. Like a child except instead of not knowing any better he knew too much.

Maybe that’s why Robin didn’t lash out or protest as the narrator pulled the lever. Maybe that’s why he didn’t scream as the pistons shifted. Maybe that’s why he only closed his eyes and ignored the shouts of triumph. He couldn’t even find it in himself to be angry at Jack and Bob for celebrating, at the moment he was only glad their cries drowned out the sizzle.

#tftsmp #tales from the smp #the village that went mad #tftsmp 1 #tales from the smp 1 #writing doodles #tftsmp fic

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lokigodofaces · 3 years

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thoughts on loki ep 2: the variant (spoilers)

under cut to not disturb your scrolling

Overall I enjoyed so that's good

Uh frick my mind blanked so sorry if things are completely out of order

I don't know, I expected the renaissance fair to be 2012 or 2021 or 2024 (Loki's time, our time, current time in the "sacred timeline"). So I was genuinely surprised when it was in 1985.

Ok, i really like the title card thing. And how the year scrolls around. It's a nice aesthetic touch there.

I wonder why the female Loki variant chooses her locations? Does she have a thing for renaissance fairs, French cathedrals, and Oklahoma?

1985 is when Back to the Future came out. And it's y'know, one of the most popular time travel movies ever. So I think they chose that year as a reference.

Again, not liking that the minutemen only have numbers, not names. It is giving me lots of Clone Wars vibes. If you don't know anything about Clone Wars, the clones are given number identifiers by the Kaminoans. Things like CT-7567. The clones would give themselves names (CT-7567, for example, names himself Rex). A really good sign throughout the series that someone is a sketchy person is if they call the clones by their numbers. The clones don't want to be known as numbers. They are people too, they deserve names, so they come up with all sorts of creative names (Rex, Fives, Cody, Tup, Hevy, Hardcase, Echo, Waxer, Boil, Wolffe, Jesse, Kix, Fox, Hunter, Wrecker, Crosshair, Omega, Tech, Matchstick, etc). The jedi respect this, and the only jedi that i can think of that called clones by their numbers is Krell, who fell to the dark side. the Kaminoans and other sketchy people all call them by their numbers and the clones don't like it. A big focus of the show is on the clone's agency (at the end, they all have brain chips that take away their agency and force them to kill jedi), and how the clones need to be respected. So for me to see in another series that people are only given numbers is bad. What's worse is that the minutemen are fine with this. They don't see it as dehumanizing or belittling. They are brainwashed into being okay with it. Which says a thing or two about the Time Keepers.

did. did the renaissance fair really have Bonnie Tyler's "Holding Out for a Hero" for their renaissance themed fight? Is this normal? Was it normal in the '80's? We saw later that the female Loki can do electronic stuff. Did she rig it to play it? For the vibes?

Also the stuff before the song was about fighting for a princess, and in the end she kidnaps C-20.

Okay, btw, I'm just gonna say Lady Loki for a while because no one has explicitly said Sylvie yet, so I'm going to refer to di Martino as Loki until she or another calls her Sylvie. Cool? Cool.

I was thinking the "Holding Out for a Hero" fight would be the roomba fight or something. It is such a good song that has huge potential for this genre. Why did they use it in a lame fight as that one?

When Lady Loki did the spell on C-20, it looked similar to what Wanda and Agatha can do. As in, it had similar visuals.

Loki reading a random magazine he finds while sitting with his feet on the desk bored out of his mind because he has to learn sh*t is a MOOD.

What is Miss Minutes? She can jump around anywhere, and pop into computers. But she can't be just a projection. She took the effort to dodge Loki swatting at her, so that may mean she was corporeal. She also could be something similar to the Kree's Supreme Intelligence?

So, did Mobius give Loki the shirt, tie, and slacks, but really didn't give him the jacket until they had to call him in? What? That makes no sense? Did the TVA not have any jackets with the variant label? Did someone have to custom design a jacket for Loki?

What is up with this show giving me things I wanted to see only in holographic form? First we saw Coulson's death, and now Loki in his Jotun form in a holograph of another variant.

Okay, Loki being someone the TVA has to constantly deal with is very on brand. Loki is a creature of chaos, of course he's going to unknowingly rebel against the sacred timeline.

Also, headcanon that the Jotun Loki we see is king of Jotunheim because that would be epic.

Also, for personal reasons I choose to believe there is a Loki variant that defeated the Avengers and immediately went queer rights.

Loki's reaction to there being many Loki variants. He's seen what his life is supposed to be. I think he is even more upset that the TVA often deals with him, that there are so many things that could have been instead if it weren't for the TVA and the "sacred timeline."

Also, I totally think Mobius was waiting for another Loki to show up to help him defeat Lady Loki. They get them so often, it makes sense.

Loki explaining the difference between illusion projection and duplication was great. And very helpful to me personally understanding lore. Also, Mobius, get your crap together. If you're a Loki expert, figure this stuff out.

Loki calling the TVA out on propaganda, we love that.

The wolf quote is actually very nice, I quite like it.

Okay, the TVA doesn't even bury or cremate or do any sort of ritual for their fallen minutemen, they just reset the timeline. Which to me seems like another way to show how little the TVA actually care for their workers.

There are statues of the Time Keepers in Ravonna's office. The camera pays extra attention to it. Keep reading for more about Time Keepers and cinematography choices.

What. What sort of relationship does Ravonna and Mobius have? What is going on there? I am really confused.

Who is this "analyst on the side?" What is going on there?

Ravonna is MEGA SUS. Along with that, the Time Keepers are mega sus.

She signs R. Slayer. Yeah. Slayer. Not at all subtle, Marvel. Letting us know that she'll do the deed if needed.

Mobius you are sending me mixed signals. What do you want?

Okay, Mobius saying Loki was a "cold, scared boy" and an "ice runt" and stuff was totally a jab at Loki being Jotun.

Mobius saying Loki is insecure because of Lady Loki is...probably true.

With the elevator, the camera stops and focuses on the Time Keepers.

The Creation of the TVA, the beginning of time, the end of time, all classified. That is sus.

Loki almost crying over Ragnarok was good. Let him cry over the destruction of his home.

Loki being the one to discover something the TVA had no idea about after a day is on brand for Loki. And it shows how the TVA really are vulnerable.

Mobius: Really? In front of my salad?

No but the object lesson was well done and actually did help me understand what Loki was talking about.

Casey! Casey drinks grape juice! Imagine how confusing this is for Casey though. Loki is captured, threatens to gut you like a fish (whatever that means), and now he's dressed like an analysist, stealing your juice box. Does Loki get Casey more juice?

Honestly, Loki looking at everything logically and scientifically is fantastic. Adds to the science = magic thing Marvel's got going on, since Loki is a sorcerer.

Loki saying volcanoes are cool is fun. I agree. Volcanoes mean the planet is geologically active, which means we won't die. Also, there is a volcano named Loki on one of Jupiter's moons. I wonder if the creators knew that and put Loki in Pompeii because he is already linked with volcanoes.

Mobius telling Loki to start off small and Loki completely disregarding that felt very personal to me.

Loki being absolutely chaotic and telling everyone they were going to die while speaking perfect Latin was iconic. I want more of that content. Let the man be buckwild.

Again, Loki finding something out after a day that the TVA never knew about is on brand.

"Be free, my horned friends, be free!" I love that way too much.

Mobius being obsessed with jet skis wasn't something I expected, but I'm down for it. Heck, even Loki admitted they were cool.

The discussion on beliefs is going to lead to saying the Time Keepers are bullcrap. Hopefully.

Grapes and nuts are "candy" on Asgard. So, when Loki was eating grapes in Ragnarok, we can interpret that as him eating M&Ms. Second, this might add to something I've seen around here. I've seen things about a book somewhere with Loki saying chocolate fountains are mythical (which is really funny to me). So, I guess Asgard really doesn't have chocolate.

Oh my gosh, so many apocalypses between 2047 and 2051...hopefully none of those happen in real life.

Roxxcart is probably part of Roxxon, something that has been around in Iron Man movies.

Lady Loki got the shovel thing from Roxxcart that she left in Oklahoma! The minutemen said it was from the early third millenia, which is where we are now! 2050 also fits that category!

I saw something about the file saying Class 8 hurricane...there are only 5 classes...which means this is a crazy storm.

Does B-15 want Loki dead? This is a legitimate question, because I think she does. Dead or pruned.

Loki looking around at the storm, I love it. This could be him loving science, or him missing Thor, since Thor creates storms. Also, at this point Loki probably things Thor dies shortly after him in the sacred timeline, so Loki would be particularly sentimental about Thor.

I love Loki drying himself off and not anyone else. And B-15 yelling about his magic. And Loki's motions are so fluid, it's so aesthetically pleasing, I love it.

Dudes, I thought B-15 was going to try to prune Loki when they were alone.

Okay, was Lady Loki bsing about the azalea sale, or does Roxxcart actually do that? I want to know.

Wunmi Mosaku did a really good job as Lady Loki, I loved it.

Loki being annoyed at Lady Loki and saying he understood how Thor felt, does that insinuate Loki can do what Lady Loki was doing?

B-15 and C-20 were both very shaken after being possessed by Lady Loki. I wonder how that felt for them? We've had different explanations of mind control/brainwashing/similar from Clint, Bucky, Daisy, Mack, Fitz, and Monica in the MCU (including AoS). I wonder what is specific to Lady Loki's possession.

C-20 kept going on about something being real. What was that about?

C-20 revealed the location of the Time Keepers to Lady Loki!

Lady Loki not wanting to be called Loki could be a sign she is Sylvie.

There's something weird where Loki's voice echoed around while the camera focused on Lady Loki. Maybe she's telepathic?

Someone needs to keep a tracker on people telling Loki this isn't his story in a show literally about him.

But, that does add to themes for his life, and how everything was always about someone else in his life. He was always a supporting character for Thor, for Odin, for Thanos. Now, even in his own story, everyone insists he doesn't matter.

I was wondering what the reset charges would be used for. I wasn't expecting a massive bombing of the sacred timeline! Wow! That was unexpected and I loved it!

Okay, this isn't from me, this is from New Rockstars. But to list all the places mentioned on chronomonitors, either bombed or not: Knowhere, Barcelona, Niflheim, Dartford, Phong Nha, Lisbon, Vormir, Thorton, Cookeville, Asgard, Rome, Sakaar, Barichara, Porvoo, Ego, Titan, New York City, Tokyo, Hala, Kingsport, Xandar, Beijing, Madrid, Portland, Jotunheim. Bolded are other planets. Those are almost all the planets visited in the MCU. So fun easter eggs there!

I like Lady Loki's aesthetic. The fingerless gloves, the cloak, I love it. And YES SHE ISN'T SEXUALIZED. So many genderbent characters are excuses to sexualize women. But Lady Loki is just as covered as the male Lokis.

Lady Loki just...left the time door open for Loki to follow...for a really long time...I'm worried he's running into a trap.

What is Loki going to do now?

Theory time y'alls: Lady Loki bombed the sacred timeline to flush the minutemen out of the TVA, leaving it defenseless. And she's gonna go after the Time Keepers themselves. We know she gets into the TVA from trailer footage, and that's what I think we're gonna see next episode. I think she (like the Loki we are following) is upset over the lack of free will, and she plans to change that. That's why she wasn't interested in helping Loki "take over" the TVA, because she doesn't want to become the leader of a new TVA, she wants it destroyed.

Alright, back to the Time Keepers stuff. They keep focusing on the middle Time Keeper. Even in the end credits they have a weird cut to focus directly on his face. I'm not 100% on this, but I like this theory. That face is similar to Jonathan Major's, the actor confirmed to be Kang the Conqueror in Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania. Kang is a well known time travelling villain in Marvel. Maybe he is Kang, and is using variant versions of himself (that's a Kang thing in the comics) to mess with the timeline, and no one expects that from him. Also, Renslayer was his S/O for a bit in the comics, and they keep framing her in front of that one Time Keeper's face. I feel like this would be a good way to set up Quantumania and to show how sus the Time Keepers are.

Also, Loki was absolutely adorable the entire episode. And he got to sleep! Yay for him!

Again, I enjoyed, and can't wait for next week!

#loki (2021)#loki (2021) spoilers #loki (2021) review #loki laufeyson #tva loki #dimartino loki #sylvie lushton #mobius m mobius #ravonna renslayer #hunter b 15 #hunter c 20 #miss minutes #time keepers #aaaaaaaa im excited for the next episode

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bootlegsymphony · 4 years

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Being Hopeful [a *personal* Komahina writeup]

*major Danganronpa 2/2.5/3 spoilers ahead*

Someone told me to gather my thoughts into a post so here it is.

Note: Unless you’re up for a challenge to potentially reshape your opinions towards certain ships, if you think Komahina is by default a toxic ship in anyway shape or form, or if you firmly believe that Hinanami is “bestest Hinata ship OTP owo”, it’s not in your best interest to read this post. I’m not suggesting you are invalid or wrong, but you’re likely not the group of people I’m looking forward to having a constructive and evoking conversation with.

First off, I might have been recognized as an avid Komahina shipper, and my opinions towards Hinanami could be generally summarized as ambivalent/mixed/minorly favourable. I was able to acknowledge Hina/Nami’s relationship as of roughly equivalent significance in regard to DR2’s theme.

But it was impossible for me to consider the two relationships narratively equal, I was able to notice that Koma/Hina was a “meant to be” endgame relationship right of the bat, yet Hina/Nami reads as this transitory experience of an obscure puppy love, or “yeah that happened” that’s melancholic and beautiful. Evidently, the narrative strongly favoured Koma/Hina in terms of screentime, development, complexity, compatibility, and endgame potentials.

I wasn’t too confident about why Komahina screams an ultimate destination of a Hinata relationship to me, yet Hina/Nami never convey a remotely similar message. In many aspects, I didn’t ship Komahina in the past for the sake of “I want Komaeda to savour happiness” but placed more emphasis on “it would be wise for Hinata if he could ascertain that his future is with Komaeda”. However I couldn’t elucidate why I thought so.

But due to some unexpected changes in my personal life, it was so effortless for me to reach an epiphany why Hinanami couldn’t quite be the same Hinata-OTP as Komahina. And now I’m kicking myself for not being able to be more adamant about it earlier.

In short, I had a brief taste of how “true bond” or “true connection” functions. It was an estranged, uncharted experience to me prior to that “sudden change”. And in retrospect it’s unimaginable how I survived that bitter life of pure bleakness without it. But since I was able to discern the characteristics of a “true bond”, Koma/Hina, while being excruciatingly complicated and bitter in canon timeline, had a great foundation for that nonetheless, while Hina/Nami was, fundamentally “deficient” in this specific department.

Hina/Nami, either the DR2 or DR3 iteration, doesn’t go beyond being a fine relationship. It’s not bad, as adolescent crushes are typically not bad. It’s functional and somewhat sweet if Hinata was just some normal shy boy who at some point met a nice caring pretty girl. But a great, monumental relationship doesn’t come from being just fine, and Hinata is much more messy than a such-and-such average joe as what a part of the fandom preferred to project him as.

But Hinata wasn’t an adequate rival and foil for Komaeda, that ridiculously multilayered character likely in all fictions for nothing.

For starter, Hinata committed Izuru Kamakura and countless war crimes, for fuck’s sake.

I had this pessimistic outlook that humans aren’t truly designated at birth to understand each other unless they are. Real life Nanami being the talented, worthy Ultimate Gamer she was, even if she could acknowledge and validate Hinata’s struggles as a talentless person, and brought him some temporary comfort and solace, she could not understand the full spectrum of complications the struggle itself entails. Being the kind and somewhat compassionate person she was, she’d try to understand Hinata if he ever decided to open up, but she’d likely just go “yeah talent doesn’t really matter you should just be confident in yourself” as long as she’s not some Ultimate Empath like Makoto (or Junko) all at the same time. To her, Hinata’s decision to Izuru-fy is unfavorable, but not particularly tangible.

It’s somewhat similar to a moderately affluent person not knowing what an impoverished/economically-challenged life entails, they could never understand why it’s necessary for anyone to opt for crimes and prostitution and shit, if you could just “yeah money doesn’t matter you should be happy” your way out of it. Why is it necessary to choose a life path of crimes and prostitution? Why is it necessary to Izuru-fy oneself? It’s the perpetual predicament of mutual understanding in humankind. No matter how sweet and wholesome on the surface that ship appeared, Nanami would hardly ever reach Hinata’s soul beyond skin-deep, if the talent/worth debate, the rigorous societal expectations, the everlasting emotional quagmire of being under-loved and under-appreciated...everything which gradually carved out Hinata’s pivotal character (that we know of) from his embryo, was a non-issue to Nanami at core.

If there was a portion of Hinata yearning for true connection in an intimate relationship (which I doubt he didn’t), his relationship with Nanami would eventually turn insufficient or dissatisfactory, despite feeling nice on the exterior.

Normally, people don’t realize they’re empty until they’re fulfilled.

But who else struggled immensely with the entanglement between talent and worth throughout their life? Who else once resolved to obliterate their own precious being in pursuit of an almost delusional ideal of hope as Hinata did, so that they could potentially speak to Hinata on the deepest, hidden stratum of his soul?

Komaeda.

It always pains me to read Komaeda’s first FTE where he suggested Hinata’s ultimate talent could be “Ultimate Serenity” because Hinata granted him some inner peace “just by being there”. Knowing Komaeda’s mind it’s a nearly impossible feat to make him feel peaceful. Komaeda likely didn’t even consider that a legitimate talent, he inwardly viewed Hinata “being there” as inherently valuable but he couldn’t even tell. Yet Hinata failed to just, be there, be existent.

And, I always considered Komaeda sustaining himself being alive to be a monument on its own, yet 2-5 happened, for Hope, I believed.

I once had a mentally stimulating talk about how emotional and intellectual transparency lead to a solid foundation of “true love” among people with someone before. They even expressed, months ago, that if Hinata could just speak up about his problems with Nanami he wouldn’t have necessarily Izuru-fied himself.

Yet even being the aloof and reserved fucker he was, Hinata wouldn’t camouflage himself in front of Komaeda. Komaeda saw through him even if he was having a hard time deciding on how he should have felt himself. He voiced, various times throughout DR2, that “we have similar scents” “I thought you would understand me” “we’re both miserable bystanders” “I couldn’t see you as completely separate from me”. On the surface it seemed like Komaeda was being cryptic and dragging Hinata to his level, but given how we knew Hinata took even more drastic measures as escapism, were they even that different?

It was why exactly Komahina dynamic was so embittered and resentful in the canon timeline. It was not hatred, but involuntary intimacy. Hinata was emotionally stripped naked (sorry, not to evoke any erotic visualizations, just a convenient metaphor) when it’s not even Komaeda’s intention, and Komaeda’s always emotionally naked. It didn’t turn out well not because it was a fundamentally dysfunctional dynamic, but they simply met each other in the worst, most despairful and unluckiest timeline possible. With continuous manslaughters ongoing, it’s only palpable that baring your soul to someone as dangerous as Komaeda would be intimidating, but it still had that mesmerizingly entrancing aura, especially in Komaeda’s last FTE.

They had no choice of not knowing each other well.

Unless either of them died, which they both did. But an ultimate future was born and they were granted a second chance to finally reach the destination they deserved.

In a post-HPA scenario, Komahina was not only somewhat contextually implied as Hinata’s endgame, but it was deliberately set up as a generally hopeful relationship as well. Kodaka once suggested in an interview that post-HPA Hajizuru inherited Hinata’s emotions, so that he was able to sort out his considerably complex feelings for Komaeda as it left off; meanwhile with Izuru’s analytical skills and insights into human psychology, it would likely become not as cumbersome. With Hinata’s determination and persistence it would hopefully not only cure Komaeda’s terminal illnesses, but also “heal” Komaeda from his hope fetish and other cruddy coping mechanisms, with all the support and dedication Hinata could provide. Hinata, being emotionally identical to his past self, would likely occasionally experience insecurity and low self-esteem as well, and it could require Komaeda’s weird little method of presenting challenges/creating minor inconveniences for Hinata in order to help him build up self-agency and develop infallible self-assurance.

It’s kind of the Ultimate Love that survived all the trials and tribulations, and to think of that the Ultimate Tragedy gave birth to the Ultimate Love, huh, seems about right for our two Ultimate Lucks.

#nagito komaeda #hajime hinata #komahina #komahinawriteup #Komaeda Essay Club #dr2meta #danganronpa2

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sparkliingdust · 4 years

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“God’s righteous man pretending you could live without a war.” A different take on Steve’s vision in Age of Ultron.

I was re-watching Avengers: Age of Ultron, because why not, and I was thinking about Steve’s vision. A lot of people, even myself have pointed out that it obviously reflects his PTSD – seeing the flashes of photography as you hear bullets and bombs in the background, wine spilt on a soldier like he’s been shot, couples dancing deliriously as if their lives depended on it, a mix of a bitter and strange victory amidst all of the bloodshed.

After Steve stops walking through the chaos, he takes a second to survey everyone around him. For a second, he looks helpless because a soldier, like him, facing everything he did would certainly feel helpless. But I wonder if everyone around him are the reflection of people he wanted to help but couldn’t. Almost like what Steve Trevor says to Diana in Wonder Woman, “We can’t save everyone in this war,” or what Steve says in The Avengers, “When I went under, the world was at war. I wake up, they say we won. They didn't say what we lost.” His vision is almost like putting faces to the things that were lost and wanting to do something for them, but obviously isn’t able to.

But then, Peggy comes along, and she provides an ultimatum of sorts. Because I listened to Hayley’s voice a little too much, it’s interesting how every line changes with the tone she uses.“Are you ready for our dance?” is a bit nightmarish and her appearance mixes in well with Thor’s part of the vision. “The war’s over Steve.” is a sterner declaration. “We could go home. Imagine it.” is much more softer, like she’s beckoning him to choose their dance.

Steve’s surprised to see her but even more conflicted. He’s gonna have to give up everything around her to dance. He’s not wearing his Captain America uniform - it’s just regular military garb. He sees himself as a regular soldier. (We also have to remember Steve drops his CA helmet when Wanda entrances him too.) So she’s not asking Captain America. She’s asking Steve. As soon as the choice between going home and dancing or fighting and staying a soldier intersects, both options disappear in a second. He turns away from Peggy for a split second to an empty hall - all of the horrors of war and the people that couldn’t be saved as well as Peggy are gone in an instant. He stands by himself.

But then his mind goes back to dancing with Peggy. A fleeting second when he could’ve taken her into his arms. He still wants to go home, but he can’t. He’s stuck where he is. He’s stuck in this new world of “I thought I could throw myself back in, follow orders, serve. It’s just not the same” as well as Sam saying “You could do anything you want to. What makes you happy? / Home is home you know.” A soldier's return to normalcy is not typically possible because they're haunted by their greatest nightmares of never going home to their loved ones and building the life for themselves they should've had before war beckoned them to leave.

When Steve tries to wrangle his new team of agents and Nat in The Winter Soldier, he says to Fury “Soldiers trust each other. That's what makes it an army. Not a bunch of guys running around shooting guns” as well as “I can't lead a mission when the people I'm leading have missions of their own.” This is counteractive to Steve fighting with the Avengers, where they follow each others’ lead. The team wouldn’t work without one of them and helps them to be in sync. But when he’s outside of the Avengers, led to do Fury’s bidding, he’s not a soldier like he was with the Howling Commandos where they followed his command but it was a team effort, and everyone was on the same page. There was no compartmentalization or Steve having to lie to himself about who he is or who he is taking orders from in order to serve. Fighting for him now isn’t the same as it was then. As soon as the Avengers disassemble, so does the lasting remnants of Steve’s self-image as a soldier and as Captain America. Fighting, no matter who it’s with, is not going to be the same after that.

Captain America: Civil War reinforces this even more when Steve tells Tony he wishes he couldn’t help others, but then admits he doesn’t – because as Ultron said, who would Captain America be without a war? When Steve crashes the Red Skull’s plane into the ice, he’s drawing the line between sacrificing himself/being selfless, and choosing his own personal happiness. In fact, it’s the hope of going home and dancing with Peggy that gives him something to look forward to as he accepts plunging towards his death, or what they assume will be his death. Similarly, in the rest of the movies, Steve’s life comes down to personal happiness or being a soldier, but so much of what would give him a life outside of Avenging is non-existent – a family, home, stability. So he keeps making the sacrifice play and helping others.

I think, like a lot of fans have pointed out, Endgame was about Steve realizing he can finally put his personal happiness above fighting and serving. Steve is ultimately an allegory for all the men and women who served believing selflessness and sacrifice would save others and make the world a better place….only to wake up from the dream about a hopeful and stable future to realize that corruption and horrors of humankind still exists. His faith ultimately becomes, not about serving or defying the government, but about individuals who will step up to the plate with him. At the end of Age of Ultron, he says he’s home as you hear military chants in the background but the compound isn’t a military camp, it’s not Camp Lehigh. He’s thinking of it as Camp Lehigh and still thinks of himself as a soldier first. At the end of Civil War, he and the disavowed Avengers fight in the shadows. He’s still a soldier. A big part of Steve’s letter to Tony says “We all need family. The Avengers are yours, maybe more so than mine. I've been on my own since I was 18. I never really fit in anywhere, even in the army. My faith's in people, I guess. Individuals. And I'm happy to say that, for the most part, they haven't let me down. So I can’t let them down either.” When you think of the people who gave Steve faith you have to think of the old and new worlds combined - Dr. Erskine, Peggy, Bucky, the Howling Commandos as well as Sam, T’Challa, Bucky, Nat, etc. His service to the world and everyone he would give his life for is what pushes him to stand alone against Thanos. But he must’ve also realized when the Portals opened, his faith in people still pays off. There were more than enough Avengers to protect Earth if he decided to leave it. He’s still a soldier, but he’s not the only one. If he can go home, why shouldn’t he - especially with the blessing that Sam, Bucky, Nat, Tony, etc. would want him to take advantage of.

It’s the second chance that ultimately matters in Endgame, that Steve couldn’t have possibly had before. He started to give himself permission to draw a line between fighting and living – probably the first time after he wanted to finish what Nat started with the Infinity Stones, and the second after Tony died to give everyone a second chance. Steve, a soldier who survived two wars against robots and three world wars, finally goes home and feels safe in the arms of the woman who loved him before he became ‘the greatest soldier in history.’ He doesn’t have to pretend to live without a war. He can just live and face any upcoming wars as they come instead of depending on them for self-worth.

(I know people will be pissed about that last section because that opens up a can of worms about alternative timelines, what happens to Peggy’s career, etc. but please don’t reply or reblog/comment with that type of stuff – it’s been talked to death and nobody will ever agree on everything.)

#steggy #peggy carter #age of ultron #my two cents

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scullysexual · 4 years

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*Prompt request for AU where Mulder gets Scully pregnant in high school and they are “forced” to marry but fall in love.*

I think this might just be my favourite part so far. It does jump around in terms of timeline and stuff but hopefully it doesn’t get confusing. Warning for Teen Pregnancy. @today-in-fic

A Baby Is Forever: Part Three.

Part One.

Part Two.

- - -

It's done. She's married. The paper is signed, no objections, one last question of if she’s been coerced. She hasn’t. Legally, she’s Dana Mulder.

.:.:.:.:.:.

“So we’re married now,” Mulder says.

They sit on a bench outside the registry office. Mulder hunched over and rooting through a bag of sunflower seeds.

“Yeah,” says Dana.

She expected to feel different but she didn’t. She had been nervous all morning, unsure of why. It was the first time she’d felt regret over the whole thing. She would never get a real wedding, never be able to have a relationship with anyone else.

Dana had been quiet whilst Melissa had done her hair. Her sister had insisted that since Dana was never going to have a real wedding, she deserved to still look pretty for this one.

The time it look Missy to do Dana’s hair, Dana hadn’t said a word. Only when the last strands of hair were ready to be straightened did Missy ask what was wrong.

Dana told her, focusing upon feeling like she hadn’t been given a choice. They just assumed she was okay with it and that was that.

This train of thought had come after she had been asked if she’d been coerced the first time around. After a bit of hesitation, and a glance towards her father who had stared at her expectantly, Dana had said no.

She wasn’t so sure anymore and that had been what she told Missy.

Her sister had calmed her fears. Told her that it was just a piece of paper, a way to protect Dana and her baby. Nobody expected them to act married.

It had helped. It got her through the rest of the day.

Now she regards her husband.

“You know Mulder,” she starts and Mulder looks towards her. “You can date other people. I’m not gonna stop you.”

He seems surprised, almost like he wasn’t expecting her to stay that or intending to. She’s taken back a bit by it. She got him into this mess, got him caught up in this whole marriage thing, it’s only right his freedom shouldn’t be taken away.

“Thanks, I guess,” he says a little unsure.

Dana smiles sadly. “I’m sorry,” she apologises. “I’m sorry I got you caught up in this.”

But Mulder is shaking his head. “I helped make that baby too, right?” Dana nods out of reflex. “Then you don’t need to apologise. I meant what I said in the hospital.”

His promise to be there all through it and afterwards.

It was a nice thought but that was now. What about when it’s 3am and the baby is crying because it’s diaper needs changing. Or when it’s crying and they can’t figure out why. Will he still be there then?

Mulder stands, tucking the sunflower seeds into his pocket.

“The same goes for you too…Dana,” her first name is a surprise. “You can date anyone you want to.”

Unlikely, she thinks. Nobody is going to want someone who already has a baby with another person but the thought is appreciated all the same.

Instead she says, “Scully. You don’t need to start calling me Dana just because we’re married.”

.:.:.:.:.:.:.

Maybe he has been counting down the days. Mentally. He wants to see his baby. Today is that day.

Mulder is more confident in this room now. Mrs Scully chooses to wait outside leaving the chair vacant but Mulder chooses to stand next to Scully again, grabbing hold of her hand.

It’s the only time they ever hold hands. At school, they talk more, sometimes eat lunch together. Through the hallways, he becomes a sort of bodyguard, guiding her through, pulling her back if someone so much as touches her. She has a little bump now, something he’s sure he spent the whole day staring at when he noticed (other’s stare too but Mulder gives them a stare of his own and they back off) Perhaps he’s a little worried that somebody might knock into her, that something will happen to the baby and Mulder will not let that happen.

They never hold hands outside of this room, outside these appointments.

His affection for Scully has grown, he wishes he could see her more than at lunch time and appointments. He wants to spend every second of the day with her. He tried to go round to the Scully’s house one time but Captain Scully told him he couldn’t come in, Dana was resting and Mulder had gone home disappointed.

He got the impression that Captain Scully didn’t like him much. He supposes he can’t blame him, he did get his teenaged daughter pregnant after all.

He holds onto her hand tight, rubbing circles on the inside of her palm with his thumb.

“We get to see the baby today, don’t we?” Mulder says, unable to contain his excitement.

The doctor sees it, too. With a smiles she says, “Yes, Fox. You also get your picture.”

Grinning, he looks at Scully who just rolls her eyes.

The machine is set up, the gel is applied, and Mulder stares with anticipation at the screen. This is the moment he’s been waiting for.

His mouth drops open when the baby- their actual baby- appears on the screen. He’s there. Actually, really there.

Eyes glued to the screen, he brings Scully’s hand to his chest, traps it between both his hands and says.

“That’s our baby, Scully.”

“Yeah, it is.”

He’s full of amazement.

“Would you like to know the gender?” the doctor asks.

Mulder breaks his gaze from the screen to look at Scully. They had joked about this- Mulder’s insistence of believing it was a he, Scully’s insistence on believing it was a she. It was a running joke between them and Mulder wasn’t ready to break that by finding out.

But if Scully wanted to…

He looks down at her, asking.

But Scully shakes her head. “We want to wait.”

We.

He gets his photo.

His photo. His photo of his baby.

“He looks like an alien,” Mulder says on the way back home. He hadn’t put the photo away since receiving it.

“That’s mean,” rebukes Scully. “She doesn’t look like an alien.”

“He does,” Mulder presses, staring down at the photo. “My alien baby.” He looks to Scully then, a big smile on his face. “And you can be my alien baby-baby mama.”

She isn’t impressed.

When he gets home, he sticks the photo on the wall by his bed and lays down, continuing to stare at it.

A rush runs through him at the sight. He’s excited. It was real. In 27 weeks he was about to be a father.

.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.

They have their first phone call at 7:06 pm on a Thursday. Bill Jr answers and after unceremoniously shouting, “Dana, phone!” she hears Mulder’s voice.

“Must be fun living with him,” he says.

“He’s not always this bad. He’s just grumpy. He doesn’t want the baby waking him up at night.”

Her sibling’s reactions to Dana being pregnant had been mixed: Charlie liked the idea of being an uncle, Missy was excited- ready to be the best aunty a baby could ever have. Bill had a sour look on his face, telling Dana she was too young to have a baby and asking if Mulder was going to bother or would it just be down to her and them?

Missy had been the one to jump in and defend Mulder, telling Bill that “of course he would be”, whilst Dana just picked at her food.

“Did you know babies can be born with teeth?” Mulder says down the line.

Caught up in her thoughts, the only reply Dana can give him is.

“What?”

“Yeah,” Mulder says, mistaking her confusion or unknowing. “The doctors take them out so they don’t choke and they’re loose anyway.”

Dana did know that, in fact, but she doesn’t tell Mulder, instead she allows him to continue on.

“And did you know that babies cry even in the womb?” That she didn’t know. “So little Mulder Jr could be crying right now and we wouldn’t even know it.” She doubts it but her hand falls to her stomach anyway. She’s been doing that a lot, lately, mostly to try and feel the kicks and punches. So far there’s been nothing.

“How do you know all this, Mulder?” she asks.

“I bought a book.”

Of course he has.

“Well, I’ve bought lots of books, actually. Some we already had but I wanted to know. I don’t know anything, Scully, and I feel like I should.”

It’s heart-warming to hear how much he cares, to hear the excitement in his voice as he rattles off this fact and that. She’s glad that if anyone had to be the father of her child, it was someone as special and caring as Fox Mulder.

They don’t talk for long. Twenty minutes because she eats dinner at 7:30 and needs to go but before she does, Mulder tells her one last thing, almost sound shy and unsure.

“Igotdabebesumthin…”

She doesn’t quite catch it. “What?”

A bit louder now. “I got the baby something.”

“Mulder, you don’t have any money,” she tells him gently but is smiling all the same.

“I get money off the magazine!”

“What, 50 cents for every copy and you don’t sell that many to begin with,” she teases.

“It’s nothing big,” he says. “I just saw it when I was out.”

Stopping the jokes, she asks. “Okay, what is it?”

“It’s a duck,” he says. Through the phone, it sounds like he’s fumbling with something. “It’s yellow with a blue bowtie and it squeaks.” A bit more fumbling with the phone and his voice is replaced by a squeak. “See?” he says, his voice back.

Her heart melts and tears begin to prick in her eyes.

“Mulder, it’s…” she sniffles.

“Are you crying?”

She wipes at her eyes, embarrassed. “No, it’s just the hormones.” At least that’s what she can blame it on. “Mulder, it’s…it’s a really nice thought-“

“It’s too much.” She hears the doubt, the sadness in her voice and has an instant need for it to be gone, for his happiness and excitement to return.

“No, no,” she starts to say. “No, really, it is a really nice thought. Keep it. I’m sure she’ll love it.”

“Really?” The joy is back.

“Really,” she confirms. She catches her mother’s eye in the kitchen and looks to the clock. “Mulder, I have to go. I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“You’ll see me tomorrow.”

That’s right. School.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.

A knock on his front door comes precisely at 8:00pm.

Mulder grabs the card off the sideboard and takes in a breath before opening the door.

“Happy birthday!” Mulder cries as Scully stands in front of him. He holds the card out to her and invites her in.

“Thank you,” she says, stepping in.

Mulder closes the door as she rips the envelope open.

It’s a simple card he chose; one with two bears on it- one of the bears placing a party hat on the other surrounded by a table of food and balloons. Mulder thought it was cute.

She opens it up and begins reading out loud.

“To my Alien Baby-Baby Mama.” He shrugs sheepishly at the look she throws him.

“Happy Birthday! But you know what that means? Only seventeen more weeks to go before our alien is born. Love Mulder.”

She’s smiling as she closes the card and it sends jolts of happiness through him to know that he- and his card- put that smile on your face.

“You’re counting?” she asks.

Mulder shrugs, “Maybe.”

She tucks the card back into its envelope, still smiling.

“Thank you,” she says again. “But you really need to stop referring to the baby as an alien.”

“Why?” Mulder asks, leading them towards the basement door. “Can he hear me?”

“You’re the one with all the books, you tell me.”

The books are down in the basement with him. Stacked near the wall, he’s found- or bought- loads of them.

“Gotta be prepared,” he says.

Mulder sits down on the couch- the same couch that their alien baby was conceived upon, something he thinks of all the time and has him smiling.

He smiles fades, however, when he watches Scully struggle to sit down.

“Are you okay?” he asks, unsure.

Through her concentration, she manages to smile a yes.

“Sitting down and getting up have become kinda difficult.”

Right, yeah. Mulder had caught her struggling to stand up from her seat in school, how she waits for everyone to leave before the struggle begins.

She manages and gets herself settled into the cushions.

“I got you a present.” Mulder stands and heads towards the mini freeze and pantry shelf in the corner. He grabs the vanilla ice cream and pickles out of their respective places and walks back to her.

Her eyes light up when she sees them.

“Mulder, I love you!” she shouts, reaching to grab them out of her hands.

It’s just an expression, he tells himself and tries not to let his smile falter.

The pickle jar is opened and immediately the basement is overwhelmed with the sharp smell. It’s worth it if it means he gets to spend time with her.

“So what’s the occasion?” Scully asks when she’s knuckle deep into her ice cream with the pickle, another in her mouth. “Other than my birthday, of course.”

“Well, I won’t be seeing you in school anymore and that’s when I get to see you the most,” he tells her, placing the VSH into the player.

“Why can’t I pick the movie, it’s my birthday.”

“Because you always want to watch horror movies,” he answers, sitting back onto the couch.

“So?” she says. Then a smile is breaking out across her face. “You’re scared of them.”

“No, I’m not,” Mulder says, a bit too fast.

And Scully notices.

“Put one on, then.”

“No.”

“Because you’re scared.”

“Because I want to watch this.”

She falls silent and Mulder hopes that’s the end of their argument.

She grabs another pickle and is about to dunk it in before muttering.

“That’s because you are scared.”

It’s the final straw and he swipes the pickle jar from beside her. He gives her his due with how quick her reflexes are but he has height as an advance and holds it up high knowing it will be too much of a struggle for her to get it.

(Is it mean? Yes. Does he feel guilty for it? No.)

“Mulder,” she scolds. “Give me back my pickles.”

He shakes his head, stretching higher just in case. “Take back what you said.”

She pouts and it’s adorable. Mulder knows how stubborn she is, knows how hard it is for her to take things back once she’s said it, but her pickles are on the line here.

“Or…” she begins, looking at him through her eyelashes. Oh, she’s good. “You give me my pickles back and we pretend I never said anything.”

But not good enough.

He pretends to think. “Hmm…No.” She’s devastated. “You have to say it.”

She turns away from him, looking annoyed and defeated, trying another tactic.

“I want my pickles.”

“You know what you have to say.”

She zones in on him, frowning. “You should know that you shouldn’t stand in the way of a pregnant woman or her cravings. Especially on her birthday.”

Oh, he’s well aware. Smiling, he begins playing with her. Bringing his arm down just close enough that she should be able to reach over but at the last second holding them back up again.

She gets annoyed each time he does it and it’s adorable, her little huffs and puffs, and insults that come pouring out of her mouth. Death threats, too, he notices but still, Mulder doesn’t give the jar to her.

He does this about three times before she either forgets she’s pregnant, or is taking a risk, and tries to reach up and grab the jar.

As she does, something seems to happen as her concentration and annoyance fades to shock.

Worry rushes through his body and discarding the jar to somewhere beside him, he grabs her arms to steady to her.

“What is it?” he asks, fully concerned that something bad has happened.

She frees one of her arms and places a hand on her stomach. A smile replaces the shock, a big smile as she looks at him and Mulder looks from her face to her hand back to her face again, confused.

“She kicked,” she says, her voice full of amazement.

Mulder’s eyes fall to her stomach. He wants to feel it but aside from holding her hand in the hospital, and the hand on her back through school, this is the closest he’s come to touching her.

Touching her stomach just seems too intimate for her but he wants to.

“Can I…” he falters, unable to take his eyes away and swallows. “Can I feel?”

Scully nods, moving her hand and he places the hand not holding her arm anymore onto her stomach, pressing gently like the books told him to.

Minutes pass but another smile passes across Scully’s face as she says.

“There is it.”

And he feels it against his hand. He understands now why she was so amazed by it. It’s incredible. The movement between his hand. That’s his baby under there, moving.

It’s amazing.

“Scully,” she hums in response. “Can I…It is okay if I take you on a date? A real one?”

He has no idea what’s made him ask right at this moment but he’s been wanting to for a while now and whether it was the playfulness of the moment before, or this moment, Mulder has no idea.

She nods. “I’d like that,” she replies shyly.

Mulder smiles, his arm wrapping around her and bringing her closer to him. She adjusts the best she can and settles into his shoulder while he presses a kiss into her hair.

“Mulder,” she says after the only sound is from the TV.

“Hmm.”

“Can I have my pickles back now?”

Mulder laughs, reaching beside him and handing them to her.

Scully takes her reward, smiling triumphantly. She won.

#txf #highschool au #a baby is forever part 3 #teen pregnancy fic #i write

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embarrassingresultofmyfreetime · 4 years

Text

2020 Masterlist

Here’s a list of all the fics I’ve posted this year! (Listed by category, then chronologically:)

Link to my ao3 where you can read all of these: embarrassingresultofmyfreetime

Currents wips:

And They Were Quarantine Mates

An old disease has resurfaced on Earth- one which most humans recover from but is permanently lethal to Time Lords.

Because of this, the Doctor stays on Earth to make sure her humans make it through okay.

And because of the Doctor, the Master- against his better judgement- also chooses to stay.

Reluctant to leave the safety of the Doctor's Tardis, the Doctor and the Master find plenty of ways to pass the time but it can be difficult to enjoy each other's company with so many things left unsaid.

Good thing they have plenty of time in isolation to work it out.

Word Count: Currently 88,172

Spyfall: Battle For Humanity

This is a little number I like to call: Roleswap AU with Dhawan!Doctor and Whittaker!Master

It's sort of a rewrite of Spyfall p2 but it's better.

Word Count: Currently 5,688 (will be about 12k when finished)

~~~

Main fics (completed):

Please Tell Me Why Do We Worry

Summary: After learning about the final loss of Gallifrey, the Doctor takes some time to grieve and finds herself with surprisingly mixed feelings about the whole ordeal.

To her surprise, a knock at her Tardis door soon reveals the Master not only alive, but in uncontrollable mental agony as he reveals that the Doctor's suffering has been amplifying his own emotions via their telepathic bond.

Note: (After so many kind and positive comments on this fic, I finally gained the confidence to start posting more! A huge thank you to so many people it means so, so much to me!)

Word Count: 5,068

Second Chances

When Graham finds a teleportation cube offering an all-expenses-paid vacation, he, Ryan, and Yaz take up the offer and give the seemingly-distant Doctor some time to herself.

After the events of Skyfall 1&2, the trust between the trio and a certain timelord is shaken. However, when their vacation quickly becomes a nightmare, it's up to the Doctor to bring about peace on an upsettingly familiar planet.

Note: (A rewrite/fix it of S11 episode Orphan 55)

Word Count: 7,130

All’s Fair In Love And War

Having escaped alive and alone, the Master dwells on his failure and uncertainty at what to do next.

Purely by accident, he runs into a version of the Doctor he's never met before and she gives him a much needed perspective on their relationship.

Word Count: 4,653

Truth and Reconciliation

“I... I destroyed a lot of things, but not this... trove of secrets. This is what started it all.”

Missing Scene where the Master goes to Gallifrey and discovers the truth of the timeless child for the first time + alternate ending to The Timeless Children episode

Word Count: 7,563

The Doctor Finally Gets Some Rest

(Ch2 update Missy pov)

The Doctor promised to guard Missy for 1000 years, but Missy doesn't mind returning the favor.

Word Count: 5,671

I Wouldn’t Wish It On My Best Enemy

"Just deserts appeared to finally be served for the Doctor. All her running had come to an end, all the lives she's taken or caused had finally been assigned a numerical value, and all the morals she had once believed in seemed to crumble to dust right before her eyes.

A life sentence.

She had JUST BEEN TOLD she would never die, and the first thing the universe does is give her a life sentence.

What kind of cruel joke is that?"

Basically: The Doctor reflects on herself while in prison, the Master rescues the Doctor and actually helps her, and idk read the tags

Word Count: 4,629

Brand New Reality

In an alternate timeline: The Master is killed in the Time War but the Doctor finds a way to salvage his oldest friend's mind by binding it to his Tardis and building him an android vessel as a way to interact with the physical world.

The Doctor also manages to save the Time Lords from their war- but he is still a renegade in their eyes. As punishment, the High Council uses the Doctor- and by extension the Master- as their personal diplomats/field agents.

The Master isn't too happy about being trapped on the Doctor's Tardis, the Doctor is fed up with being the equivalent of a dog on a leash to the Time Lords, so in a moment of anger and also pure luck- they break out from their world and end up on a parallel one with a very different version of their universe and very different versions of themselves.

(Shalka!Universe Doctor and Master meet their modern counterparts- the Thirteenth Doctor and Dhawan!Master)

Word Count: 10,148

The Imposter(s) Among Us

The Doctor has been searching the universe for the Master, but it's only when she takes a break to help a damaged space vessel that she runs directly into him!

The Doctor has a hundred and one things to ask him, but there's no time for any of that now. The ship is barely functional and if the mysterious murderer doesn't get to the Doctor first, then the trigger-happy crewmates might throw her out the airlock before the killer gets a chance.

Word Count: 12,655

My Dear, Doctor…

The Doctor investigates an anomaly to find that her previous self has stood up their oldest friend for the umpteenth time.

Confused as to why the Doctor can't recall ever receiving Missy's invitation in the first place, the Doctor goes searching for answers and ends up finding far more letters than just one…

Word Count: 6,657

~~~

Series:

And They Were Happy Au Parts 1-4:

Part 1: Dinner and a Show

All his lives, the Master had always believed that he and the Doctor could hold on for about the same amount of time. He always imagined that when they reached their last lives, they would both give all this up and spend their retirement years bickering and raising bees or whatever. The Master didn't particularly like bees, but he had always imagined that the Doctor did and as long as they were together, that was enough to satisfy him.

What he had discovered in the Matrix had proved his ideal endgame impossible.

The revelation that the Doctor was The Timeless Child meant that the Doctor would always live on. They would always evolve and survive no matter what happened. The Doctor would always race to people in need; and now, they would never have any reason to stop.

(AU where the reason the Master wanted the Doctor to kill them both in The Timeless Child is bc he's on his last life)

Word Count: 5,120

Part 2: Dinner and a Show One-Offs

"The Doctor did her best to space out her visits with O. For every couple adventures she had with her 'fam', she would stop by his home once or so. Sometimes she let months slip by, because she knew that the longer she waited, the less of O's limited time she used up.

She felt guilty to calculate it, but if O was already in his mid-thirties and he lived a full human life...

Suffice it to say, she wanted it to last for as long as possible. She had never had a situation as stable nor as safe as she now had with O. After everything they had both been through to get to this point, she refused to jeopardize a single moment.

For all the pain the Master had caused her, O was well worth the wait."

(By popular demand, a continuation of 'Dinner and a Show')

Word Count: 10,926

Part 3: Unjustifiable

O- having no recollection of his actions as 'The Master'- returns to being Earth's Horizon Watcher.

O is proud of his work and he cherishes the Doctor's frequent visits, but it's becoming increasingly apparent that she's been keeping more secrets about his past than he had theorized.

To make matters worse, the arrival of an advanced species of aliens on his doorstep brings with it a whole new plethora of problems. Something terrifying resurfaces when O hears they're searching for a Tardis and things go terribly wrong.

Word Count: 23,870

Part 4: Found Family

The Master finally gets around to seeing the universe in a more peaceful way and runs into a young woman looking for her father.

Word Count: 3,663 (Will possibly be updated at a later date, but complete for now)

~~~

Oneshots Inspired by others (specific inspiration in the beginning notes of each):

All Alone In The Dark

While heading back to Earth, the Doctor hears someone calling for her help.

She tracks it back to the Master- injured yet alive- and finds him trapped in his own head, reliving his last confrontation with The Time Lord Council before the destruction of Gallifrey.

Word Count: 1,926

You Again

The 10th Doctor and Missy each escape their last canon appearances believing that the other is dead for good.

So imagine their surprise when they run into each other at a party in the 1920's.

Word Count: 6,943

Sick Day

The Master has everything set up for his latest evil scheme but when he tracks down the Doctor, he realizes his best enemy is in no condition to fight. So the Master does what any good nemesis does and takes care of him.

Desperate Times, Desperate Measures

Word Count: 2,807

Prompt: "Right now, I don't know if I want to kiss you or shove you off a bridge!" "Can I pick?"

The Master’s Tardis had traced the call seven minutes in advance to this exact time and location. He pushed open his Tardis door to find himself in front of some no name bar with graffiti scrawled on the side, situated in front of an empty ravine. He was on Earth, and there was probably a similarly ramshackled city around him, but he didn’t so much as spare it a glance.

The Master’s steps were determined, his jaw clenched, and his hands shaking despite his signature device in hand.

He had been on the other side of the universe, licking his wounds like any old villain would when disappointed by their latest nemesis showdown. It all made his blood boil to have caved so soon. To come back and HELP the Doctor.

The Doctor still had O’s number and her call was scheduled to be made in exactly seven minutes. A hysterical, agonizing call that begged the Master to intervene. He wasn’t sure what was worse, hearing the Doctor in so much despair, or the disappointment that hearing her in such agony somehow didn’t lessen his own.

Word Count: 2,410

The Beginning and The End

Prompt: First Doctor, Dhawan!Master, Gallifrey, and the dialogue: "I know my words mean close to nothing for you. But I do, in fact, love you very much."

Basically Theta (Academy Era Doctor) accidentally runs into the Master on a burning Gallifrey

Word Count: 4,499

Kisses Like That

The Doctor's never understood why humans enjoy kissing so much- but a certain, somewhat familiar woman piques his interest.

(Missy goes back in time to give 10 a lil kiss)

Word Count: 1,885

Spyvember 2020

Collection of short fics I did inspired by Spyvember prompts (from Tumblr)

Word Count: 15,506 (6 separate chapters)

~~~

Thank you to everyone who has inspired me, commented on my work, read any of my writing, and overall has just supported me in any way this year!! Thank you for keeping me motivated and helping me improve as a writer!

My best wishes to you in the new year! <3

#here's a version w a break for mobile users lol #otherwise its the same #doctor who #dw #doctor who fic #doctor who fanfic #thirteenth doctor #dhawan!master #dhawan master #yasmin khan #ryan sinclair #graham obrien #thoschei #spydoc

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mandarinastronaut · 5 years

Note

different anon but i was wondering if you could go further into why you think boreo stay together and what the romantic moment at the apartment in antwerp was? ive finished the book and while i personally like to think they stay together ive always struggled to find any evidence that they do.

First I have to say that the ending, in my opinion, is poorly written. It feels like an afterthought, and the disconnect from Theo makes you feel he’s no longer the one talking to you, but Tartt herself is. It’s rambly, confusing, and messy. It’s the part of the book that made me feel unsure as to what Tratt’s intent with boreo was, if it was only queerbait, or if she left it up for interpretation merely because she didn’t want the controversies of having an explicitly queer book. Either way, Boris is almost completely forgotten, and so is his and Theo’s relationship.

That being said, you could interpret that it’s Theo’s fault, rather than Tartt’s. He doesn’t want the reader to know what happened after Antwerp, so he just leaves it, leaves Boris, out. After all, he is still the same extremely unreliable and messy narrator we’ve grown to love since the very first pages of the novel.

Theo tells us very little, and very briefly, about his time in Antwerp. This is suspicious because he and Boris must’ve shared some important moments there, since this is straight after Amsterdam and also the last time Boris is mentioned. It’s very obvious that he doesn’t want us to know what happened there. But luckily we can make an educated guess.

Tartt relies very heavily on symbolism in her work, and this book is no exception. Drugs are probably the main tool she uses in tgf, besides the painting. Boris, for example, symbolizes everything Theo thinks, or is supposed to think, is bad and unhealthy. He symbolizes drugs, criminality, wildness, freedom, queerness, vulnerability, and so on. So let’s analyze the Antwerp scene.

“Do you ever think about quitting? I asked, during the boring part of It’s a Wonderful Life, the moonlight walk with Donna Reed, when I was in Antwerp watching Boris with spoon and water from an eyedropper, mixing himself what he called a ‘pop’.

Give me a break! My arm hurts!…”

“…Well, big stigma and fear, I understand. Me–honest, I prefer to sniff most times–clubs, restaurants, out and about, quicker and easier just to duck in men’s room and do a quick bump. This way–you always crave it. On my death bed I will crave it. Better never to pick it up. Although–really very irritating to see some bonehead sitting there smoking out of a crack pipe and make some pronouncement of how dirty and unsafe, they would never use a needle, you know? Like they are so much more sensible than you?

Why did you start?

Why does anyone? My girl left me! Girl at the time. Wanted to be all bad and self-destructive, hah. Got my wish.

Jimmy Stewart in his varity sweater. Silvery moon, quavery voices. Buffalo Gals won’t you come out tonight, come out tonight.

So, why not stop then? I said.

Why should I?

Do I really have to say why?

Yeah, but what if I don’t feel like it?

If you can stop, why wouldn’t you?

Live by the sword, die by the sword, said Boris briskly, hitting the putton on his very professional-looking medical tourniquet with his chin as he was pushing up his sleeve.

And as terrible it is, I get it. We can’t choose what we want and don’t want and that’s the hard lonely truth. Sometimes we want what we want even though we know it’s going to kill us. We can’t escape who we are…” (862-863)

a lot to unpack there oh boy

Boris is injecting himself with heroin. It’s one of the most amazing sensory pleasures one could experience, and it’s often compared to sensual pleasures; orgasms. He says he’ll crave it on his death bed. This very brief moment they share is intimate, and isn’t completely what it seems to be on the surface. Yes, they are talking about literal drugs and addiction, but they’re also addressing the feelings they have for each other–Boris will crave the sexual feelings he has for Theo, but also the strong emotional bond they share (love), and ultimately, Theo as a whole.

Boris says he began because a girl left him, and if I remember correctly, this was after Theo left Vegas (I’m pretty sure I’m correct, bc I really don’t remember Boris doing it back then, but correct me if I’m wrong). Theo left him completely and utterly alone, and that’s when he started. The timeline matches, so it’s plausible, if not likely.

Boris explains he doesn’t want to stop. So what if it’s bad? So what if it’s a sin? So what if it’ll kill me? In the words of Achilles (from The Song of Achilles) I wouldn’t stop. And Theo says he understands. He says two very suggestive and convenient lines; we can’t choose what we want, we can’t escape who we are. I’m sure I don’t even have to breakdown the subtextual meaning behind that, it’s so blatant.

And this whole conversation’s happening while the famously acclaimed romantic scene from It’s a Wonderful Life plays in the background. Tartt deliberately chose a cinematic masterpiece of a romance scene for this conversation. And if that doesn’t create enough of a romantic atmosphere for the scene, this does. You see, the moon is an occurring symbolic tool in tgf. Theo’s mother told him to look up at the moon when he felt homesick, Boris is quite literally the moon as his Islamic name Badr means moon, and at one point Theo asks Boris if the moon looks the same everywhere, to which Boris of course replies yes you fucking idiot. So adding this very specific movie sequence where James Stewart promises to lasso the moon for Mary, is not a coincidence. @zombiebowlcut has a separate post regarding this, so here’s that!

Theo’s final monologue is about having a heart that cannot be trusted, about wanting things you shouldn’t want, not having the yearning to conform to conventional social constructs, not getting to choose your own heart, not getting to choose the person you are, and finally about how to confront this, if you should stuff your ears with wax like Kitsey, or if you should embrace it like Boris, throw yourself headfirst and laughing into the holy rage calling your name; if you should live inauthentically or authentically. And Theo chooses the latter. He’s done with crime, since he’s finally unchained from the painting. He’s buying back the fake antiques, and he’s not getting married to Kitsey. The only thing missing from Theo’s truth is his sexuality, and furthermore Boris. And that, is why I believe you can interpret they end up together in the end.

#the goldfinch #boreo #theo decker #boris pavlikovsky #ask #asks #ahh sorry this took so long I literally wrote most of this at 4am yesterday #bc i didnt have time left from my schedule aksdkjsdkj #and now its 6pm and I finally have time to finish and post this #they say as they're really supposed to be writing a composition thats deadline is in a few hours #sometimes you just have to cope through boreo yk

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player-1 · 4 years

Text

Union X update 9/3 (Spoilers)

Oh boy, time to let some steam out... And major spoilers and speculations are below, so tread carefully.

STOP SAYING VEN IS THE MURDERER! HE IS NOT GUILTY BY ASSOCIATION! HE IS THE VICTIM! THE BLOOD IS NOT ON HIS HANDS BY DEFAULT, DARKNESS WAS THE ONE WHO TOOK STRELITZIA’S LIFE! HE JUST HAD THE UNFORTUNATE CHANCE OF BEING IN THE WRONG PLACE AND AT THE WRONG TIME!!

Alright, rant’s somewhat over, let me explain a few things...

Given Darkness’ information with the Book of Prophecies, and with the famous phrase “And the Darkness will triumph and Light will expire”, it used Ven as the Trojan Horse in order to ensure their survival in the Worlds beyond (more so like a double standard, but I’ll explain that later). But of course, there’s a few key factors to consider...

1. Why would Darkness kill a Union Leader? Wouldn’t Ven being a Dandelion have the same effect as ensuring its survival? Because being a Union Leader assures the person the privilege of keeping their original memories of the past. If Ven was a Dandelion on its own, he would have his memories erased regarding the War, and under the Leader’s watch, they may destroy Darkness in its path before it made it out of the data world. And on that note, Ven might even reject Darkness as a regular Dandelion regardless.

2. If Ven had Darkness with him, wouldn’t Ava be suspicious? Of course, since Darkness works as a completely separate entity and uses Ven as an unassuming vessel of sorts. And with a Keyblade like Missing Ache, a powerful three-tier in fact, it would be odd for an eleven-year-old like him to possess at the cusp of the War. But on that note, we now know that Darkness took the form of Ava to trick Ven into going to the abandoned warehouse, where both the Player and Strelitzia went into. And given their striking similarities (more so the default Player), it would be easy to assume some kind of mix up...

3. So what does that have to do with anything? If Ven wasn’t supposed to be a Union Leader, or even a Dandelion himself, why did Darkness pick him? Because he was alone. Because he didn’t have anyone to call a true friend. Because he doubts his strength as a Keyblade wielder and a Union Leader. He was shut off from the world, possibly by force, and raised oblivious of the Keyblade War itself and the burden he inadvertently carries. All of that was possible because Darkness saw a lonely little kid and twisted his mind to believe that he may never get the love and support he wanted, that he can only trust his own shadow and his own heart.

-“The one who answered was a boy with short, wavy golden hair and a tendency to look at the ground. He was so quiet that it was hard to imagine him fighting with a Keyblade.“ -“You two know each other, huh? Must be nice; I’ve always been on my own.” -Ephemer had never seen this boy Ven. Many Keyblade wielders he would at least recognize by face, and would usually hear stories of the truly exceptional ones, but Ven fit in neither category. (Unchained X light novel, pg. 125) Ventus: "Wait. Keyblade wielders fighting each other!?" Ephemer: "Didn't you read the book, Ven?" Ventus: "I did, but...I guess I didn't realize what it meant." ~~ Ventus: "I disagree." Brain: "Whoa, Ven. When did you grow a spine?" Ventus: "This is serious. I don't like the thought of wielders turning their weapons against each other." (Union X Mission 846: Pride Shift) The Union Leaders and Dandelions knew about the rising tension leading up to the War, or in this case, everyone in Daybreak Town knew about the War coming. All except for Ven. He never considered it a possibility that wielders would turn their weapons against each other, fighting for Lux and not against the Heartless itself. For all he knew, everyone was just going about their missions like nothing even happened...After all, that’s what the Keyblade was for, right? Fighting against the Darkness?

But without Darkness (the entity), he never would’ve gained the Keyblade in the first place.

Notice how Missing Ache is mostly connected to Dark Medals? If the Keyblade is a physical manifestation of the heart, than that defines their relationship: Darkness coming into contact with a pure Light like Ven’s, and taking care of the rest of his potential. It’s that kind of control that will eventually make Ven doubt himself, doubting his strength and his potential to make any kind of friendship apart from the Union Leaders.

And even if he lost his memories in the Birth by Sleep timeline, it still had a lasting effect on Ven. -Xehanort tearing his heart apart because of Ven’s incapability of using the forces of Darkness...Because Darkness is an entirely separate entity. The same reason applies on why Darkness/Vanitas was able to survive on his own while Ven was forced to heal with the help of another heart (Sora). There was never “two halves” of Light and Darkness, there was only 1/4 of Light and 3/4 of Darkness. -He reacts negatively to any sort of criticism, and even goes into shock at the motion of a Keyblade raised at him (see BBS novel ch. 11 for more info (it also mentions his love of sweets, btw)), but he also hates the idea of Terra and Aqua holding back their strength, automatically assuming that he’s weaker than both of them. -And even with the four years living in the Land of Departure with Terra, Aqua, and Master Eraqus, he never closed the gap between friend/student to brother/son-figure. Even with his amnesia, he remained distant of their compassion, never opening up to them in an honest, loving manner...

Darkness thrives on the idea of controlling someone weaker than itself. Daybreak Town, no matter its grandeur and charm, is a dog-eat-dog world, and it made sure Ven know that truth from the beginning. Friends and partners will abandon you when you fulfill your purpose. The weak will die alone and the strong will crush the weak like bugs. Opening up your emotions and true feelings will make you weak, and people will take advantage of you because of it. The only thing you can trust is your own shadow and the weapon you carry in your heart. Darkness and Light are one and the same, one cannot live without the other. They are brothers until the end of time, experiencing and feeling the same things and the same emotions. Where you go, I follow, so even if you think that you are alone, I will always be by your side forevermore. And because of me, you would’ve never made new friends (that will eventually leave you), you never would’ve been in the seat of power (that will eventually crumble around you), and you never would’ve seen the Worlds come into fruition (Light will eventually fade, and the Darkness will consume). You are my Light, I am your Darkness, and without me, you would’ve been dead long ago. Darkness as Vanitas wanted to keep that control, even after they were separated by Xehanort. He also didn’t fight back against Xehanort because, as the abuser became the victim, he had no idea to react. Xehanort made Vanitas weak because of his own power and his own skills of manipulation. Even if he didn’t remember entirely, his dark heart grew colder at the thought that, even without his darker half, Ven can still live a proper happy life. He’s furious of the idea that Ven can live without him, that they can’t share that same happiness, but also avoiding the cycle of doubt and eventual betrayal caused by his hand. But Darkness isn’t inherently evil, it’s just stuck on the logic of “There is no true happiness, where there is love is betrayal, where there is friendship is abandonment, nothing is truly happily ever after...“. And because of that fact, he let Ven watch Darkness take Strelitzia’s life, hoping to find the Player and save them from the War, because life doesn’t give you second chances that easily.

In a way, that would make Ventus believe that her death was entirely his fault (since he accepted Darkness as a part of himself, ie. guilty by association), that all he will do is hurt people, and possibly his new friends. And he may believe that, as long as he’s all alone with his shadow, no one will get hurt, no one will betray him, and the cycle will just repeat on and on and on.

On a sidenote, KH3 Vanitas pretty much describes their relationship to the core: -I’m the piece of Ventus that was taken away, and you’re the piece Ventus needed to be whole again [Sora]. So why shouldn’t you and I look exactly the same? (Taking the appearance of someone Ven can trust, ie. Master Ava and Sora) -You define me, Sora, the same way that Ventus does. We are brothers who, together, make a greater whole. (Light/Darkness duality) -But I am darkness. And I do stand by your side, I’m the shadow that you cast. How much closer could I be? -Ventus: But I didn’t ask for this. To be sifted apart, nice and neat. We should be free to choose. Not just light, not just darkness. We decide what we are. Vanitas: But...Ventus, I did decide who I am. You see? Ventus: And what you are is darkness? Vanitas: What I am is darkness. Ventus: ...Okay.

All in all, Darkness/Vanitas decided that he should exist by his own nature, meant to be the opposing force against Light. But at the same time, Ven decided that he should be defined as a person, not a puppet stuck with the strings of fate. And in the light of the new Worlds, he could abandon the weak and innocent child he was in the past. But as Vanitas’ final words tell him, what I am is Darkness, you can’t change Darkness in its truest form.

(Also don’t ask me on where Ven’s Chirithy fits into this, I honestly have no idea. For all I know, they may or may not be aware of Darkness’ control on Ven, so we’ll just have to wait and see in the next KH arc.)

TL;DR:

#kh union x #khux #khux spoilers #kh ventus #kh strelitzia #kh darkness #rant post #abuse tw #kh3 spoilers #those kids need some therapy!

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svtskneecaps · 5 years

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Darling, We’ve Got Time : Part 10

Vernon and Seungkwan’s little group of time state deserters has been leading Seungcheol’s team of time agents on a Tom-and-Jerry chase through the timestream for what may have been the entirety of their career–different setting, same result–but the tides are starting to shift. Things aren’t adding up to the time agents, and all the deserters can hope is to sow enough seeds for them to finally put the pieces together.

(Seventeen Time Travel AU; no reader)

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They told Seungcheol a small lie and met Public Enemies One and Two of the Time State at a quaint cafe in Los Angeles.

“Chan tells us you started to notice,” Vernon said seriously, fingers laced together like they were at a business meeting and he was wearing a suit instead of an oversized Hawaiian shirt.

“We keep forgetting things,” Mingyu said, a coffee going cold in his hands. “Why?”

“That’d be the time state,” Seungkwan said. “Any memories containing feelings going slightly deeper than casual comradery get wiped during regular checkups. Any memories containing amicable feelings towards a deserter also get wiped, which is why you don’t know us.”

“So you knew us?” Minghao asked.

“Sort of, yes.” Vernon took a sip of his drink. “Enough to know your fascination with the sixties, anyway. How’d you enjoy Woodstock, by the by? You never said.”

“It was amazing. The part I managed to catch, anyway.”

“And that’s how you know all this stuff about us?” Mingyu asked.

“Yeah. All of us worked with you guys’ team at some point, before we figured out the whole ‘wiping’ thing and dipped,” Vernon said.

“Obviously the time corp wasn’t super enthused with the idea,” Seungkwan said, snickering. “Who’d have guessed?”

“But anyway.” Vernon set his drink on the table and leaned forward. “Now that you know the truth, what comes next?”

The time agents looked at each other. Honestly, Mingyu didn’t think he knew. He hadn’t gotten past ‘getting answers’. He didn’t think he could stay and keep forgetting, but he didn’t know if he’d be able to desert if Minghao planned to stay behind.

Evidently, the others saw their indecision. “Come with us,” Seungkwan offered. “You can meet the rest of the gang for real. If you decide to go back, we’ll jump you to this exact moment with Captain Cheol none the wiser.”

And Mingyu looked at Minghao and recognized the decision in his eyes, the decision he felt deep in his own bones.

“Okay,” they said.

Seungkwan’s face split open into a grin and he rolled up his sleeve. “Man, they’re gonna be thrilled. Fair warning, nobody expected to get another newcomer this early. Reactions could be mixed.” He spun dials on his watch with a practiced ease that Mingyu watched curiously (he’d never seen anyone work a handheld up close). “Alright, everybody hold on.”

They formed a hand holding chain around the table, and Seungkwan pressed the button. With a roar like thunder, the table vanished.

As did the chairs, dumping them onto the ground.

“Ah,” Seungkwan said, picking himself up and brushing the dust off. “Guess I didn’t consider the possibility that the chairs would have moved.”

Vernon bumped his side. “This is why I usually choose the jump times.”

Seungkwan shoved him right back.

Seokmin came barrelling out of a nearby building, skidding to a stop in front of them. “Lee Seokmin,” he said, thrusting his hand out for them to shake.

“We know,” Minghao said, but shook anyway. “Xu Minghao.”

“We know,” Jeonghan echoed, coming out of the building at a more reasonable pace, Jun and Chan following behind him.

“Well, did you know I was almost crowned King Arthur in medieval England?” Seokmin said, crossing his arms.

Mingyu blinked. “No.”

“Didn’t think so!”

“So that’s the kind of stuff you guys get up to?” Minghao asked. “Screwing around with timelines everywhere?”

“Time fixes its own holes,” Jun said. “For example, nothing we’ve done has made the Titanic miss the iceberg, and we’ve tried pretty much everything. There’s no worry about mucking up the timeline.”

“So the time state was lying?” Mingyu asked. “I spent years of my life training for a lie?”

Jun shrugged. “We all did. It’s just profitable for them to control all of time travel. If they perpetuate the myth that reckless time travelling could destroy life as we know it, they’ve effectively got a stranglehold on tourism.”

Minghao scowled. “We have to tear their false system down.”

“We will,” Jeonghan said. “But it doesn’t seem like a very good idea to start a revolution when former friends of ours could be the ones pointing a gun at us. I wouldn’t be able to shoot them, would you?”

Mingyu tried to imagine Wonwoo standing against him, blaster aimed to kill. Could he?

“No,” he said.

Chan nodded. “We have to be patient,” he said. “It sucks a lot of the time, but it’s been working so far. You two figured it out, I’m sure the rest aren’t far behind.”

“How long?” Minghao asked, and Mingyu knew who he was thinking of.

“Could take a day, could take a year.” Vernon shrugged. “Time is relative. Your guess is as good as ours. Probably better; they have to have changed since we left.”

“A week, then,” Minghao said, and he sounded so convinced, Mingyu almost believed it.

Soonyoung saw them vanish. And he waited. And he waited. And they didn’t come back, and they didn’t come back, and they didn’t come back.

And he was conflicted.

Because he liked Minghao. He knew he was a good guy and Mingyu was a good guy and he didn’t know why they were out there talking with traitors. They had all looked very serious, and he hadn’t been able to hear what they were saying, and now, trudging back to the time ship, he worried that they’d been traitors the whole time.

And he’s struck with the realization that he was going to be hunting his teammates (his friends) through time.

And he had to break this to the team. Somehow.

Minghao worked in his department, under his jurisdiction, and Soonyoung allowed this to happen. Maybe even made this happen; he harbored his own rebellious sentiments that he tried and failed to quell time and time again.

He can’t help but feel like this is his fault.

When he told them, Seungcheol punched a wall. Joshua went very pale. Jihoon’s face turned to stone.

Wonwoo just looked stunned.

“I’m sorry, I should’ve burst in and stopped them before this went too far,” Soonyoung said, fighting to keep a lid on his emotions before the anguish broke out.

“Right,” Seungcheol said, and when he turned around his face was hard. “We’re down two men. Wonwoo, can you track?”

“Sure,” he said, even though tracking was always Mingyu’s thing even during training and it was obvious that everyone felt queasy at the thought of anyone else taking over his job, but Wonwoo had the skill set for it and that was what they needed.

“They’ve been brainwashed,” Seungcheol said, “but we can still bring them back. The time state can counteract it.”

A white light flashed in the distance. Soonyoung stood for his checkup. Seungcheol balled his fist like he was going to punch the wall again. Joshua touched his elbow and he released it, but he still seemed livid.

“We’ll get them back,” he said. “And these fugitives will pay for what they’ve done.”

When Soonyoung came back from his checkup, everything was wrong.

Wonwoo saw him come in while he was trying to figure out Mingyu’s setup, and despite everything he looked. . . cheerful.

“You know you don’t have to act happy,” Wonwoo said. “We’re all upset.”

“I’m not acting,” Soonyoung said, and it sounded so genuine Wonwoo tore himself away from the computer to raise an eyebrow at him.

“You were just torn up about it, how are you so chipper? Minghao was like your protege ever since he joined the team; he was your favorite.”

“Are you sure?” Soonyoung tilted his head, seeming bemused. “I always thought he was sort of flaky. It was really a matter of waiting before he ran off. A shame he had to take Mingyu with him, though.”

Wonwoo was officially lost. “Soonyoung you adored him. Everybody knew. You were devastated when you gave us the news he’d deserted.”

Soonyoung frowned. “Of course I wasn’t. Xu Minghao was never a top priority.”

And then he left like nothing was wrong. Like he hadn’t just rocked Wonwoo’s whole perspective. And Wonwoo just.

Didn’t know what to do.

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