#you cannot. understand. how deep the madness goes

[dailyoyo]

hi again dailyoyo (mostly directed at mod noname) i have 2 question

1) would you ever be up to making a jsr/yoyo tidbits blog or post someday? you find a lot of 'hidden' jsr stuff and i think a masterpost to links and images or something if you're up to it would be really nice

2) WHERE the fuck does yoyo come from like what do you think whats your general consensus. does he have a family. is he not an earthling. why is he here??? is he homeless??? does he avtually have a lovintg family and became a gang member for shits and giggles??? why???

if i made a second blog it would die probably. also i wouldnt really say i find "hidden" jsr stuff per se, almost everything i know about is either just from the games or other sources linked/mentioned on the wiki! i don't Find this shit i just overthink it and peel it apart with my teethhhhh. @dedtoot would probably be a better person to ask abt niche jsr oddities i think esp cuz iirc they own the wiki? IDK WHAT ELSE TO REC SORRY

oh god this is gonna get long i think. you opened the fucking can of worms YOU HAVE NO IDEA ok so there's two things about this. the first is that like. i tend to think of pretty much All the ggs (excluding roboy on account of hes a straight up robot) as like. Just Guys. just mundane homeless outcast or runaway kids who are doing whatever the fuck. iirc in Paradox we hc'd Soda (and maybe Boogie i dont remember?) as having homes and jobs but barely being able to keep up with them, and Cube and Combo and Coin HAD a shared apartment deal but Coin's dead and Cube and Combo are in japan now, and i think we said Mew has a home and family that's just REALLY hands-off, but like aside from that they all kind of just Live at the garage. the second thing is that me and pseud keep backstory headcanoning to a low level, because whatever like. You don't end up as a homeless street teenager for fun reasons. in our interps like despite the more fantastical elements of the setting, these are all traumatized youth who ran from stark, brutal, mundane problems that we don't especially prefer to puzzle out and examine too much in this particular fandom. (paradox!Beat gets more backstory than everyone else because of plot relevance (beig gouji's kid) though. rip lmao) this even extends to an in-universe extent of the ggs kind of being like. "We dont ask each other about our backstories. If someone wants to volunteer that information they can but otherwise IT IS NOT OUR BUSINESS" which brings us to our headcanons about yoyo. paradox!yoyo on top of whats been said prior is also an intentionally "mysterious" individual. he's also fucked up in the head in ways that are genuinely concerning. he treats the idea of him having a past as a joke - he will make shit up, he will feed you 20 different fake backstories. sometimes they'll be obvious jokes, sometimes he'll say something really horrible to make you feel sorry. and if you mention something ACTUALLY from his past, he will either deny that ever happened or say you're thinking of someone else entirely. there are a few things we HAVE overtly established about paradox!yoyo's life before the GGs: - he's probably been in tokyo-to his whole life. he's been around most of the city (often scamming people lmao) - he has been homeless since he was 12, though we do not know WHY - he is transgender, but he may not have called himself that until the GGs, and we do not know WHEN he started presenting as male or why. - "yoyo" is just one in a LONG line of pseudonyms and false identities he has made up for the sake of convenience. he refuses to claim any of these past names as having been him and has even figured he'll just stop being "yoyo" and be someone else if things don't work out with the ggs. - he's dissociative as shit so HE might not even remember his backstory so like. we don't know where yoyo came from in our hcs. we don't know what his life was. that said? it was probably very bad. a happy and healthy childhood does not turn you into someone who believes they're a hollow shell playing pretend at personhood in a neverending social game of chess that you can only win by cheating. At the age of 16. SORRY IF YOU WERE HOPING FOR SOMETHING GOOFY BTW . i feel this blog really does not let on that me and pseud's idea of fun is doing straight up paranoia agent shit to joke characters. We dont got that #vreepypasta tag for nothing

[senseandaccountability]

the healer has the bloodiest hands

I wrote some thoughts after the finale of Veilguard. Solavellan heavy.

This is just me, parsing through some feelings. "My people had a saying long ago -'The healer has the bloodiest hands'. You cannot treat a wound without knowing how deep it goes. You cannot heal pain by hiding it. You must accept. Accept the blood to make things better."  Solas to Thom Rainer in DAI.  ***

One can wonder, of course, what Mythal has to do with a Solavellan reunion and Solas’s choice to become the Veil’s protector, but hear me out. 

It is significant that it’s Mythal because she is the embodiment of his terrible past, the epitome of their brilliance and boldness and good intentions turned to terrible truths. The horrors they did, they did together. It is significant that it’s Mythal that sets him on this new course by removing the chains of his guilt and regret. Lavellan can’t do that, she didn’t forge them. Solas’s journey as the Dread Wolf begins and ends with Mythal. 

Mythal literally pulls Solas out of the Fade to use his wisdom, first to not lose herself to the other gods' vanity and brutality, then to gain advantage against them in an endless power struggle that breaks them both, I’d argue, though most significantly it breaks Solas. Retribution and revenge has no room for understanding, there is no wisdom in conquering. And Solas, for all his faults, isn’t brutal or cruel, doesn’t want power for his own gain. Instead he’s wise and creative, doomed to see the faults of his actions even as he carries them out, arguing in vain that the Evanuris too must see it - don’t cross these lines, don’t do it like this, don’t warp and twist your powers to forces of destruction. You must know this is madness! He objects to the creation of the bodies for the ancient elves, objects his own People’s physical creation. Did the earth not shake? It did, it was horrific and it was wrong and he knows this and it doesn’t matter. What he wants has never been part of the equation. 

Even when he breaks free from Mythal, when he burns her mark off his face, he never stops fighting for the world she once wanted. Because otherwise? Should he stop? Then all that he has done, all that he has given up, all that has been demanded of him both as Mythal’s lapdog and the Dread Wolf, leader of the rebel armies for centuries, cloaked in a persona of strategy and battle orders - all of that has been for nothing. He has made a ruin of himself, of the world, for nothing.  So he begins again, he picks up the pieces, he swears to make it right, to fix what he broke. That’s how he perceives healing, that’s what he thinks he is doing. But you cannot heal pain by hiding it. That’s why the Crossroads are falling apart with the manifestations of Solas’s greatest regrets, that’s why he needs Rook to escape his own prison, that’s why a Regret demon burns through Skyhold.

Solas traps the Evanuris as a final act of the ancient times, the creation of the Veil an embodiment of everything he and Mythal ever were - protection, benevolence, retribution, wisdom, pride. He ties it to the blood of the Firstborn out of spite and anger and it wrecks the world in ways he could not foresee. In ways he cannot fix because you cannot fix what has already happened.

You must accept. Accept the blood to make things better. He holds himself like a broken thing in front of Mythal and you can see it as submissive or as a man finally letting his grief out. There, at long last, he stands beaten and bloodied and blighted and he cries for all that was lost, all that he did and all that was done to him, all the things he cannot, cannot undo. And then: a new way forward.

In willingly binding himself to the Veil he embodies the best of those old myths, the All-Mother and the Breaker of Chains, as he breaks the cycle of punishment and grief and protects the sun and the moon. This oath, as opposed to the oaths of the empire that made him, is not to someone but to everyone, to all the innocents of the world. Instead of being the one who makes the terrible sacrifices of other people - the things I have done - he becomes the protector of the world that his people broke once upon a time. Instead of being the Creator of a new world without the Veil - the god he vehemently does not want to be, that he arguably thinks nobody should be - he becomes a caretaker, a guardian. A healer with bloody hands. And yes, it takes Mythal to break Mythal’s hold over him. You cannot treat a wound without knowing how deep it goes. And this one goes deep.  But it’s Lavellan who brings him the light in this story. It’s Lavellan who breaks through the dark, transforms it into something hopeful. 

His prison construct in the Fade was terrible, an abyss of regret made to hold a god. An ancient punishment for ancient crimes but times change, people change, the People change for better and for worse and here Lavellan stands in all her mortal imperfection, offering him not a way to change the past - where all these ancient beings are stuck - but a way to mend the future. It will be a terrible place, he tells her, saying I am terrible because the Fade shifts around our beings. It won’t be terrible, Lavellan argues. Because I’m there with you, walking the dinan’shiral with you, all the way. He doesn't have to fix anything first, he doesn't have to change for her, he just needs to stop hurting the world, hurting himself. Because she loves him, despite all the terrible mistakes he has made. Because she knows all his names, from Dread Wolf to Vhenan, she knows the power of his mind and the fires of his love and she saw more than most of the man he is. The man he wants to be. For a little slice of time there in Skyhold he was that man, he was seen and he saw. He saw the world filtered through her and could forgive it, he saw her through his own ancient, tired eyes and he fell in love no matter how much he thought he did not deserve it. You don't have to deserve love, or mercy, it doesn't demand anything in return, holds you to no oath. It is a gift, freely given. That's what Lavellan offers him by holding out her hand there, at the edge of everything. That's where the light slips in.

She’s real, which means everyone is real and she changes everything, because she can.  Ar lasa mala revas. 

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 4 part 7

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

THIS IS THE LAST EPISODE 4 ENTRY I SWEAR

agatha: why yes I'm listening politely because I'm being sociable, not because this story concerns me in any way shape or form

she did NOT want TO DO IT AGATHA. HE WAS HER SON TOO AGATHA. did you ever give her a chance to SAY any of THAT. damn rio is (metaphorically) fighting for her life here. waiting centuries to catch her wife with her guard down next to a random fire, and then reworking her LONG PLANNED SPEECH into bite sized easily digestible bits so that her emotionally stunted soulmate doesn't run away screaming

I was doing MY DAMN FUCKING JOB agatha

agatha looks away like whooops! wasn't listening! wasn't looking at you! no sir, not me!

that's right. acknowledge her feelings. show her that you understand but that you're hurting too. be mature. you're doing great. god the way she swallows and stares right ahead, so determined. this is such a crucial moment for her.

agatha: i'm stone cold. I'm a wall. this is not affecting me in the slightest. I'm bored, really.

lilia not missing a word of what rio's saying

lmao the neutral pronoun lasted two seconds. she's not even trying to pretend like she isn't talking about agatha. and the way she nods to herself like yes, I did the best I could with this. so, there.

"she is my scar" is going to the sapphic annals, isn't it?

LMAOOOO the unblinking cat stare. rio is like I WAS TALKING TO YOU DUM-DUM. I KNOW IT, YOU KNOW IT, EVERYONE AROUND THIS GODDAMN FIRE KNOWS IT. CAN YOU PLEASE PLEASE FUCKING TALK TO ME PLEASE DEAR GOD

and agatha doing a teeny tiny side glance and going whoooooooops not looking! I'm NOT looking! I'm not even here! and scrunching her face more and more trying to keep it blank

AND she's gone. she's so predictable lmaooo. every dang time.

awkwaaaaaard

rio with her soft smile again! with the little amused eye roll! never getting mad at agatha's antics. she's like FINE I'll come after you, you BIG BABY. the patience this woman has

lilia is so scared of rio because somehow, through her exceptional Seer abilities, she knew instinctively that this is her mortal foe. but something funny has just happened: here in front of her there's just a regular little guy, a bit odd maybe, doing her little thing, trying to talk to her ex. might it be... might it be that death isn't a monster, that it's just a thing, a strange but natural thing that happens to everybody? lilia cannot accept that quite yet. so she grabs rio and says no, no. I've seen what you are. you're scary, you're evil, you're dangerous. this is lilia's survival instincts kicking in. we are simply wired to fear death, that's just how humans are. it takes an exceptional mind and soul to see past that.

oh god, here we go, here we go. deep breaths (I'm telling this to myself tbh. i need the pep talk)

stroking her hair so gently. soft, tentative.

hey, subtitle people??? what the fuck??

rio just stands and stares. lets agatha decide what comes next, goes at her pace always

the haiR CARESSING

the HUG. the BIG SIGH. this bitch was running away screaming from rio just yesterday. and here she is. her love. her partner. she finally acknowledges rio's pain and all that they lost and all that they were (and still are tbh) to each other. THIS is what rio was looking for. she's not flirting to manipulate and deflect now, she's not being somebody else. this is agatha cracked open and bleeding love and sorrow

and they melt into each other, and they're rocking each other back and forth, with all their pain and tenderness and longing

agatha with her face buried in rio's shoulder. I'm unwell

and then agatha gently pushes rio back and strokes her hair and cradles her face like she did so many times before and leans in and here I am giving you a play-by-play and running a commentary like a totally normal and sane person would

you know what makes for a perfect onscreen kiss imo? no it's not tongue, although these two will give us plenty of that too. it's the TREMBLING. THE HESITATION. THE YEARNING.

rio and her superhuman willpower. couldn't be me.

and and and and and agatha looks at her puzzled for a second and doesn't register what's happening and dives for a kiss again she's so far gone. the feral animal noises I'm making you have no idea

THE ICY SHOWER

THE STEP BACK. THE MOST PAINED SMILE

THE REGRET

I think one big reason why agatha is always so calculated is because she's afraid her instincts will take over. she does something big and spectacular and stupid and then calls it a 'calculated risk' when it was actually a rush of fear, desire, sorrow, anger that she couldn't control. tonight rio has managed to poke a little hole into a carefully constructed dam, and now all the water is rushing out and tearing down the walls. agatha has rio in her arms and her shape, her scent, her skin are so nostalgic and familiar. her brain goes on autopilot, she's been lonely for so long, she is FAMISHED for love and connection and sex and acceptance. rio wanted her to open up, but agatha doesn't do half-measures. rio wanted her to give for a change, but agatha can only ever take.

rio HAS to put a stop to it. she puts logic before heart, one of them has to and you know agatha isn't gonna. more than anything rio wants to take this one perfect moment and run away with it, but instead she tears herself away and asks, what happens next? what happens if I have to take billy away from you? that reanimated corpse, that freak of nature who walked into your life only yesterday and took over?

billy is now part of the equation and rio cannot ignore it. she has been so gentle and careful with agatha, easing her into a reconciliation that is now in jeopardy because here comes billy maximoff like a sword of damocles! what happens if agatha takes her back only for rio to break her heart all over again? there would be no coming back from that. rio cannot help being the grim reaper just as much as agatha cannot help being a succubus, and she is almost at her breaking point here. because she is hurting too! she is sick of having to be the mature one! she's sick of always coming in second after all of agatha's issues! turns out there's a limit even to the heartbreak an impossibly old and wise being can take.

(and now I need a smoke and a future episode that is just 30 minutes of hot but soft cuddles and kisses and sweet nothings. please.)

once again a big shoutout and thank you to all the people reaching out and leaving comments, it's incredible to hear from you all @crybabyheathen @onceuponalegendbg @idkbroletssee @psychicsolanum @73chn1c0l0rr3v3l @a-tad-bit-obsessed @a-rusty-bucket-of-woes @miacheezytoon @isagrimorie @april-december @aquaaquila and I'm probably forgetting someone but I see you all and I appreciate you so much!

and now for something extra

[klavlock]

ok so. hear me out on this one but moshang and bingqui swingers au (cw for infidelity and airplane levels of silly plot contrivance re:demon culture)

//

shen qingqiu does not mean to walk in on his semi-clothed husband grinding down on his equally dishevelled second in command. that wasn’t… like. intentional. he was bored and binghe and mobei jun were doing demon realm politics things and he wondered if they might want company! which clearly!! they didn’t!

he does scream. but its in shock! and then, a second later, when what he’s seeing dawns on him, in anger.

oh. then he’s crying. yep, those are tears. and his legs feel a little weak so… floor time!

binghe and mobei jun make themselves presentable at speed and then binghe is hovering in front of sqq, apologies tumbling from his lips and pulling sqq’s hands away from his face. sqq isn’t really listening.

but when mobei jun tries to sneak out past him sqq grabs that motherfucker by the sleeve and drags him down to his eye level. “don’t you fucking go anywhere.”

mobei jun looks? a little frightened maybe? good. he should be. “consort shen-“

“how the fuck could you do that to shang qinghua.”

binghe’s torrent of apologies pauses. “shizun?”

“mobei jun. tell me you did not just cheat on my best friend.”

mobei jun does not say anything. binghe is still holding sqq’s wrists, so he cannot claw the other man’s eyes out. “let go of me, binghe.”

binghe drops his hands immediately. “shizun-“

shen qingqiu has stopped crying now. he wipes the last of his tears away from his face. “tell me why i shouldn’t rip your dick off?” he asks mobei jun, his tone steely.

binghe breaks in again. “shizun, this husband must take equal blame, i’m sorry. mobei and i were sparring, it got heated - i thought-“

“binghe, shush for a sec. i’m not mad at you.” sqq does not see the look of utter confusion on his husband's face. his attention is on mobei jun. “did you cheat on my best friend?”

“in demon culture-“

sqq lunges.

by the time shen qingqiu has been wrestled off mobei jun, the latter is sporting multiple scratches, a sword wound in his shoulder and the beginnings of a black eye. also, a new respect and admiration for lord luo’s spouse.

shang qinghua has also arrived. he has assured sqq that yes. this was an aspect of demon culture he had actually consented to, he’s fully aware his king sometimes rubs one out with other ppl, no it doesn’t bother him but “luo binghe? my king?? did you have a death wish??”

sqq threatens mbj a few more times for good measure. sqh gets a little misty eyed at how deep his bro’s loyalty goes. he is reassured that sqh’s feelings are not hurt and the only boundary crossed was mbj’s choice of sparring/sex partner. (a discussion that sqh could handle without his bro’s help, seriously, cucumber.)

only then does sqq turn his attention to his husband. who’s immediately throws himself at sqq’s feet. “this luo binghe does not deserve his shizun’s forgiveness, he only asks—“

“this husband is not mad at you. binghe is a growing boy-“ (shang qinghua squawks) “-he has hormonal urges that he cannot always control. this master wishes to be informed ahead of time, in future, if his husband wishes to spend time with another lover. I only ask that I remain the first in his heart and… in his bed.”

there. sqq thinks. i’ve handled the whole harem-creation urge of binghe's very nicely. established my own boundaries but let lbh sow his wild oats, or whatever the phrase is.

sqq has no idea why everyone’s mouths are hanging open.

“that’s it?” asks sqh. “you almost kill my king for maybe being disloyal to me but your husband gets off scott-free?”

“binghe’s binghe. i can’t be mad at him.”

sqh facepalms. binghe preens. only mbj looks confused. “so… lord luo and i may continue…?”

“only if quinghua’s ok with it. but yes. this master allows it.”

mbj nods. “thanking consort shen for his generosity and understanding. will you be taking a bed warmer? traditionally, of course, it would be shang qinghua-“

sqh lets out a squeak. sqq’s eyes widen. “what, like—“ he turns to sqh, who flinches. his sword is tossed aside, pulled from him during his attack on mobei-jun, but he brandishes his fan menacingly. “DID YOU WRITE SWINGING INTO PIDW?”

“ONLY INTO THE DRAFTS, DUDE.” sqh raises his arms above his head for protection but it’s too late. sqq’s upon him.

luo binghe and mobei jun watch their spouses tussle onto the floor and then watch in fascination as sqq proves himself very adept at demon sparring culture after all by straddling sqh and pressing his face roughly into the ground.

“did you just lick my hand?”

“i’ll lick your /face/“

“well since you’re a hack who wrote swinging into the narrative you might as well /kiss/ my face you ridiculous, awful— mmmmffh”

and they were kissing. perfect. mbj shoots lbh a look and lbh nods, gesturing to the door. their husbands seem occupied and he and mbj didn’t exactly get to finish what they were doing earlier. they should remedy that.

[astr0logywh0r3]

astro observations pt. 2

1.) venus square mars ppl have trouble with balancing their masculine and feminine energies. they can feel this internally and it can make them feel insecure. one second they feel hyper feminine and the next they feel more masculine. they wish they could find a way to balance both sides of them but it’s a struggle. they could come off too strong from time to time as a result of their inner conflict (might come off too strongly feminine or masc in the moment) and then they’d feel bad ab it later

2.) i think neptune in the 1st/conjunct the asc might be good at making other people feel special 🤨

3.) mars-pluto ppl have that confident inner power within themselves

4.) cancer risings remind me of fluttershy from mlp 💀

5.) saturn conjunct asc/in 1st house might have been extremely shy kids. they have a lot of determination within themselves though. makes a very strong-willed person. go after what they want with resilience and understand the importance of taking calculated steps to achieve their desires. definitely the no-bullshit type

6.) pluto on the ascendant always reminds me of tony montana from scarface for some reason 😭. i guess it makes sense since al pacino has pluto conjunct his asc so idk. it’s just that archetype. tony wasn’t afraid and didn’t stop at anything to reach where he got. a phoenix risen from the ashes. stubborn. that “don’t tell me what tf to do” type energy. intense, babe. their eyes are crazy too (it’s like they store all their inner intensity and deep emotions in their eyes ..lotta depth). also the no-bullshit type. if they’re mad at you ……be afraid 💀 they will plot revenge and start conspiring some shit

7.) taurus risings are pretty in a “oh, they’re cute” way. they have short little noses and pretty eyes

8.) pisces risings… are y’all good at telling stories? 😭 i think you guys get a little sidetracked

9.) chart ruler in the 9th makes someone adventurous… they just wanna explore and do everything. try everything there is at least once. could have a great sense of humor too

10.) scorpio moons are really protective of their family. they guard their families just like they guard their emotions

11.) unpopular opinion but scorpios aren’t mysterious to me 😐 i’m not sure id call any zodiac sign mysterious tbh it really depends on the whole chart. scorpios to me are just super honest people who have pragmatic opinions that they aren’t afraid to state out loud. if a scorpio has an opinion they feel strongly about they won’t be afraid to let others know how they feel, which i admire about them to an extent. they like getting to the nitty gritty of situations. some of them can actually be very kind people. funny as well due to their honesty and boldness. oh, and they just love dark reds. search up “maroon” and that is literally their staple color you cannot tell me otherwise

12.) i’ve met leos who i’ve found boring before which goes against their stereotype 💀 sometimes their personalities are just the bare minimum honestly unless the rest of the chart says otherwise

13.) mars in the 11th have big dreams for themselves. they wanna make a difference.

14.) 8th house sun makes someone intriguing and mysterious. it can also be a placement that grants beauty.

15.) moon in the 4th just wanna belong.

[the-dumpster-fire-of-life]

hey! I saw your writing for Miles earth 42. I was wondering if you could write what it would be like dating miles earth 42. Like some headcannons. Thank you!!

(hello! Sure I can and here ya go! Enjoy!)

Dating Earth 42 Miles Morales

I not gonna lie, he can be an ass at times

Especially when mad or annoyed or in arguments

Tries not to but is late or sometimes can't make it to daes and feels so bad

Tries to make it up to you the best he can

But other than that, he's probably the best boyfriend to have

Obviously before he was the prowler and before his canon event, he was just our Miles

After the canon, that changed but with you sometimes old peeks of that Miles bubbles up

He's protective

But in no way is possessive

You could do whatever you want and he would let you

Nobody is willing to mess with him or you because as you're doing your thing, he's nearby and watching you

If anyone looks at him and then to you, they can tell you're together

He's willing to fight if someone ever talks shit about you or makes you uncomfortable

Let's you braid his hair as long as you don't mess it up or pull on his hair too hard

He likes the feeling of sitting between your legs, his head like resting on your thigh as he just feels your hands making their way around his hair

It's a very comforting feeling and don't be surprised if he puts little pecks onto your thighs

Will not let you feel insecure, especially in like revealing or tight clothing because you just look so good

A sorta deep and sorta rough kisser at times, especially in the moment but in more soft and intimate times a slow and passionate kisser

Likes having his hands on your waist and sorta leaning you down as he kisses you, your arms around his neck and shit

Favorite place to kiss gotta be your neck and your jaw, he just has too

A hand always in your hip or on your back

Arm around your waist or around your shoulder

If you steal his clothes and he sees you for the first time in them he's gonna stare for a moment

Then just watch the smirk form as he comes up to you, kisses you and oh my Lord

Or he's hugging you from behind

Likes having his hands like roam your sides

Slips his hand onto your neck or weaves his hand into your hair, pulling you closer when you guys kiss

You can kiss him for an eternity and then some

Kissing you is like addicting to him

He always wants to make sure you're safe, and can handle yourself so he likes you to carry like a pocket knife or he taught you some shit

And if you get into fights he's obviously proud of you because you bet your ass you won

Makeouts are actually pretty common as he makes up kisses he missed

he either is hovering above you while you're on your back and kissing you

Or you're straddling him and kissing him, his lips slip down to your neck or your collar bone mind you

Or you're against a wall or he is against a wall

He likes flirting and making you flustered

He's an asshole with that shit

Calls you nicknames in Spanish or says stuff in Spanish, if you don't understand he does it even more

I feel after his dad he was more closed off, a wreck inside but wanted to be strong for his mom and you

You need to help with that and you di, you're practically his rock now who he goes to for anything, even when he doesn't want to talk

Just being around you helps him

He likes laying his head in your lap

It's just so nice and comforting to him, kiss his knuckles or play with his hands

"I love you, you know that, right?" Or "Don't worry, you got me." Is stuff he says on the daily

Hold his hand and run your hands over his knuckles and feel how relaxed he gets

He can hug you from behind, put his head on your shoulder and just stay there for god knows how long

He buys you a lot of shit to make up for what he cannot say as sometimes he can't say how much he loves and appreciates you

So he does stuff to show it

If you like cuddling he likes either having you by his side, arm wrapped around you with your head on his chest or him laying on your chest

Spoon him from behind, he loves it but will deny it entirely

Make him flustered, he'll be frozen for a minute before a real smile comes onto his face

On days where some shit is hard, either by being the Prowler he likes laying on top of you as you whisper shit into his ear

He needs stuff like that

If you got on with his mama he is not letting you go

Especially if his mom liked you because that shit is rare

Let's you steal his clothes on the daily

He sees you eyeing something when out with him, or he sees you about to buy something or have a new interest?

He's buying you it and buying you whatever you need

Go nuts, baby, he loves seeing the smile on your face

Play fights with you, likes pinning you down and just kissing you or tickling your side

He loves hearing your laugh and seeing your smile as they just calm him at the worse times

Likes sneaking away with you from anything possible

Little compliments mean so much from him, makes you feel good about yourself too

Arguments don't happen often but he doesn't yell at you when they do

He raises his voice but never yells at you

Some shit may slip, inconsiderate shit that makes him an asshole but he knows that immediately

Not the best at apologizing so give him time when he does come to apologize

Make him grovel ISTG

Nicknames from him are just so smooth and so- oh my god

Head on your boob and hand on your ass

I say no more

Will not let harm to you come no matter what as long as he breathes

He didn't plan on telling you he was the prowler for a long time

You had to find out yourself and he thought the relationship was over

He was saying over and over it was okay, he does it to protect his family and you, that he wouldn't hurt you and so on

You may need time but he understands

Always is sneaking in through your window also

If you have siblings and they meet him prepare because they now love him more than you

Babysits them with you and is now their partner in crime against you

He's so husband

[memoirofasparklemuff1n]

omg just read ur long sleeves fix it was sSOOOO GOOD! if u write part 2 i will be tuned in & reading ☝️☝️

i miss you, i'm sorry- r.c. x reader

part 2 of long sleeves!!!

OMGG IM SOO GLAD YOU LIKED IT <3

warnings: swearing angst (?) mention of drugs, rehab, and reader is so fucking codependent, like girl?? anyway, this is horrible y’all i cannot for the life of me write a happy ending so i tried my best 😞 can you tell i’m depressed LMAOOO? YALL SHES DEPRESSED TOO 😔 but seriously if i could make it happier hmu, i won’t get mad i promise. i’m new at this whole writing thing 🤠 not proofread cuz i wanted to post this already so tell me if there are big mistakes and my first language isn’t english so sorry if there are errors

disclaimer: the reader's depression is based on my own experiences, everybody is different and what i might go through isn't the same as what another person goes through. with that said, if you find any of these topics triggering, i understand! so, please always take care of yourself <3

ps: sorry this took so long, i've just been busy with school and my dad has been sick for a few days now so i haven't had time.

I'M ALSO HALFWAY DONE THROUGH THE FLASHBACKS FOR NO BODY, NO CRIME. i just haven't had the time fml. hopefully tomorrow 🤞. ok enough whining and into the story 🥁

want it, so i got it, did it, so it's done

making the bed started playing and the first line felt like a punch to the gut. i hated when life kicked you when you were already down.

i quickly changed to a cheery workout playlist that felt more mocking, in a sense, but decided it was better to not relate to the lyrics than listening to my despair sing back to me.

after that day in tannyhill, i'd decided to start running at night. in a silly way i thought that maybe running would burn away my pain in a healthy way. though how healthy running on barely any sleep, with nothing but depressive thoughts in my brain, was beyond me.

still, at least this way i felt like i was doing something. that i was taking action instead of moping. that doesn't make any sense. ugh, shut the fuck up. i really didn't know whose side i was on half the time.

the night sky was clear, making the stars wink at me as if they knew something i didn't. the sea breeze caressed my face, combing its fingers through my hair and drying away my tears.

running equated crying but by the time i got home i would be so exhausted that i couldn't even think. which was, of course, the ultimate goal. not think of him.

six months had passed and it didn't hurt any less. on the contrary, all i could think was how i'd abandoned him. probably when he needed me the most. two weeks after our breakup, sarah called me to tell me that rafe was terribly sick and they were taking him to the hospital. i'd debated whether i should tell her what had happened but she then said that she was aware of the situation and that i shouldn't go see him. she was only letting me know and, in a way, it felt like she was blaming me.

that was the last time i had contact with the camerons, town gossip and my mother becoming the only ties left between us. he'd gone to rehab and was apparently taking better care of himself, his family supporting him every step of the way.

fucking hypocrites. ward never cared when i told him about his son's addiction, instead saying that i should keep quiet, that everything would be okay. rose only cared about new shopping places to spend the family's money. sarah had started spending time with her new boyfriend and barely came home and wheezie was far too young.

so that left me. it had always been me, but when word got out of how bad rafe he was, they then played the card of ignorance and became the holy family.

i took a deep breath and slowed down to a jog, unaware of where the fuck i was. i looked at my surroundings for the first time and of course, i was in front of tannyhill. the gates were close but i could hear muffled voices on the other side. stepping closer to listen like the eavesdropper i was.

i looked through the bars of the gate, only to see him or well his back. he was with ward, who was lowering another suitcase to the ground. i frowned but i then heard his voice saying my name.

Ward turned his head sharply in his direction, "you are not seeing her again, alright? she's the one that got you into this mess in the first place." oh so the asshole blamed me.

he turned to face his dad and i gasped. his hair was buzzed and he looked older, healthier. he looked good but i couldn't help but feel like this was a different person entirely. i felt a slight pang in my chest because i'd been the one who had insisted on him leaving his hair longer and now he'd erased that too.

his voice interrumpted my thoughts, "dad, that is not true and you know it." why was he defending me? in a way what ward said was true. i'd left him alone that night.

his father stepped closer to him and put his hands on his son’s shoulders, “son, trust me when I tell you that it is best for you to stay away from her. don’t set yourself up for disappointment. We know where that led you.” Ward then kissed his forehead like one did to a child in a condescending manner.

Ward then picked up the suitcases left and turned to enter the house, leaving him standing there with a strange expression on his face. He lifted his gaze and somehow found mine, like they always did. I’d forgotten how we always sensed the other, no matter how much time had passed. My heartbeat sped up, causing me to quickly turn around and ran away from him as fast as I could.

“He is such a good father to those kids, especially Rafe.” Vanessa, my mother’s friend said, swooning over ward. Like god, he’s married, get a life.

Either way it seemed like every corner of this island is haunted. Ever since he’d come back as a stellar young man, all the women at the country club started obsessing over him, but more so his father. They practically held him as a saint and it only made my blood boil.

I felt my mothers gaze on me when his name was mentioned, noting the way I flinched and seemed particularly interested in the half eaten strawberries on my plate. They continued to chatter, causing me to tune them out and look at my surroundings for a distraction. Big mistake.

The doors had opened as if on cue, and there he was with a new found confidence that was unfamiliar to me. Before I could look away his eyes found mine, quieting everything around me, dèjá vu flooding my body. We looked at each other for what seemed an eternity until ward came up behind him, clapping his hand on his shoulder to turn him away from me. The colder version of his son’s eyes bore into mine in a warning. Stay away from him.

I looked back down at my plate no longer interested in my food. My eyes welled up and I knew that if i stayed a minute longer on this table I would start sobbing or worse.

“Mom? I’m not feeling well so I’m going home,” my voice quiet in her ear and she realized what I meant.

She nodded, “take the car, ok?”

“It’s ok, I can walk home.” I needed to clear my head and driving wasn’t the best idea.

“Are you sure?” The concern in her eyes made my heart wrench.

“I’m sure, mom. Thanks.” I stood up and voicing my goodbyes, leaving the club as fast as I could.

The sun was out and the sky was clear of clouds, a stark contrast of how I felt inside. I walked down the path, golf carts filled with kooks passing me by. All of them chattering about the next party or newest deal they had closed.

I kept walking and walking until I reached the boardwalk, which was thankfully empty. I sat down on the edge, swinging my feet over the water with the girl staring back at me and somehow looked as if she was drowning.

The wind carried the sound of footsteps behind me, my body tensing as his perfume arriving along with his shadow looming over me. The drowning girl hid away, leaving me alone. I almost begged her to take me with her.

“Why do you always run away?” my heart sank and then restarted when I heard his voice. For the first time in months, I heard the world clearly again. I hadn’t realized the power it had over me. Didn’t you?

Who was I kidding? He would always be my favorite person, everything about me was shaped by him. My favorite color was blue, my favorite smell was his cologne, my favorite taste were his lips, my favorite sound in the world was his voice, his body my favorite thing to touch. But most of all, his soul.

I took a deep breath before lifting my gaze to his. The knot on my throat made it hard to speak, “Who said I was running away?”

He scoffed before sitting down next to me. “I know you. Or at least I thought I did.” His tone sounded reproachful, his eyes searching my face. this time i really looked at him, gone were his red, glassy eyes, the gauntness of his cheeks but most importantly, the anger that had felt permanently etched into his features every time he looked at me.

the buzz cut now made his features more prominent, his body was stronger and not as skinny as when he’d been living off cocaine and god knew what else.

he looked more like the rafe i’d met forever ago, but there was still something that wasn’t quite there. his innocence. which wasn’t the one of a child, but more so the type of innocence that comes with ignorance. the type where you think you can get away with anything and that bad things only happen to somebody else, but never to you. no matter how bad you behave, you genuinely believed there would be no consequences.

and the boy in front of me knew how untrue that belief was.

“rafe, i—” the knot on my throat became worse, preventing me from talking further. great, now here come the waterworks!

i turned my face away so he couldn’t see my tears but it was too late.

he took hold of my face, “look at me.”

i tried to jerk away but it was no use. i had no other choice but to cry silently while he judged me.

“im going to talk and you’re going to listen, understood?” his voice now held a tone of authority i’d never heard before.

that’s kinda hot. dude, now is not the time.

i nodded because what the fuck was i supposed to do?

he turned so both of his hands held my face now. then he did something i wasn’t expecting, he leaned in and kissed my forehead for what felt like an eternity.

when he pulled away his gaze held mine, with a force stronger than any physical restraint i could possibly be held in.

the tears were flowing freely so i probably looked like a drowned cat at the moment.

“im not mad at you, ok? i hope you know that i never asked for you to not visit me. i know it was my dad that didn’t want you near me, but i swear that the only person i ever wanted by my side was you.

“i won’t deny that i was furious when you left me that night. i only got worse because i didn’t have anyone to stop me, or at least try to. i felt like you were the last person that still believed in me, who would always be beside me. and i took you for granted.” his words felt like a knife through my heart. i abandoned him.

“rafe, im sorry. i shouldn’t have left you like that. not when you needed me the most.” my words barely made sense but he somehow understood. he always did.

“no. you did the right thing. i hurt you, i told you that i hated you. when all you’d ever done for me was love me. i’m sorry, ok? if you hadn’t left then maybe i wouldn’t have gotten help.” he lowered his hands to his lap, my face burning where they had been resting.

“i know you tried to help me. that you talked to my dad about how i was and i know that he dismissed you. he only took me to the hospital because i overdosed and he didn’t want the island to know how ward cameron’s perfect son was a drug addict.” he laughed in a humorless manner, “hell, he even paid everyone at the hospital to keep quiet. that didn’t help much, frankly. gossip always finds its way.”

i wanted to say something but i could tell he wasn’t done so i waited until he felt ready.

this time his voice was hoarse, making me realize he wanted to cry too. i couldn’t take it anymore because nothing could hurt me more than seeing him in pain.

“rafe?” i murmured. he looked up with a broken expression causing me to wrap my arms around him. i felt him tense for a second before he hugged me back tightly.

my shirt got wet with our tears and we clung onto each other like a lifeline, with rafe repeating my name like a mantra. after a while, we pulled away and he held my face between his hands like before, only this time much gentler.

“i miss you, im sorry.”

“i miss you too, rafe.” i fell back into him, resting my head on his shoulder. we sat silently for a while before he spoke.

“can we at least be friends?” the question caught me by surprise.

“you’ve always been my best friend, rafe. but again i’m sorry for not being there, i should’ve done more.”

“no, you couldn’t have. it was the way things were supposed to be.”

he played with my hair like he used to, “you’ve always been my best friend too, kid.”

i punched him playfully at the name, making him chuckle. i pulled back to see his face and i wiped away the few tears that were left with my hand. he fell silent, leaning into my touch, “i love you, you know? not being close to you drove me insane. and it makes me so happy to see that you are healthy, at least physically.

“i want to help you in any way that i can and i want to be there from now on, if—“ his lips crushing onto mine cut me off before i could finish. his hands were in my hair, holding me in place as if afraid i’d run away again.

only i knew i wouldn’t. not this time. he groaned when i bit his lower lip, softly. he ran his tongue along mine before i let him in. i sighed into the kiss and pulled him impossibly closer. our lips explained more than any words that came out of them ever could. i separated from him to breathe and he only kept kissing my cheeks, jaw, neck until he reached my collarbone where he rested his head with quick, short breaths.

“i love you too,” he said. i touched his hair and ran my fingers over the short strands.

“i like your hair, by the way,” i murmured.

he laughed, pulling back. “really? i got it because i thought you would hate it.”

i rolled my eyes, “are you serious? either way, you look good with any haircut.”

“i wasn’t exactly planning on this to go like this. in my head, i was going to confront you and tell you all the ways i’d been miserable but that went away when i saw you that night by my house.”

“oh.”

he chuckled, “yeah. oh. anyway, i was telling my dad how i was going to ask why you never visited me and that’s why he said what you heard.

“i then realized it had been him and as if life liked playing tricks on me, there you were at the gate with a sad expression. yet before i could say anything you left running. i wanted to go after you but my dad called me inside and i didn’t want a fight that night. so i waited until i saw you today and when i was going to ask you to talk to me, again my dad came along. but then i saw you leave and i figured it was now or never, so i excused myself and he was so busy talking to the others at the table that he didn’t notice.”

i scoffed, “well, i’m guessing he noticed by now.”

he laughed, “yeah.”

we fell silent but i still had one more thing to ask, “how did you know i was here?” though i think i already knew the answer, after all i hadn’t exactly been surprised when he came. more like a sense of having your intuition confirmed.

“remember the night we met? i was alone and drunk, saying i was going for a night swim when i saw you sitting here alone. which should’ve alerted me that you were a weirdo but between your beauty and the alcohol, those thoughts went to shit.”

i blushed slightly, “i’m not a weirdo, jackass. i’d had a rough night.”

“i know, kid. i’m just messing with you and besides, i might’ve drowned that night if you hadn’t been here,” he smiled fondly but a bit sad as well.

“so, that makes me your knight in shining armor?” i grinned.

he scowled in mock annoyance, “how dare you mock a damsel in distress?”

i chuckled and felt a heavy weight lift off my chest. i felt lighter than i had in a while, and all because of him.

“my apologies, dear.”

he took my hand with a smile and brought it to his lips for a kiss, before placing it against his cheek.

“but to answer your question, we always find each other,” his words sinking in. that was true. we always did as if there was some invisible string tying him to me.

“you’re right. although you’re still not beating the stalker allegations,” i teased.

“ugh shut up, it was one time!” he groaned.

i burst out laughing, “you followed me for a whole day! that’s some stalker behavior type shit.”

“c’mon, kid. i wanted to give you your bracelet back and i didn’t know where you lived,” his eyes widening in a too innocent way which caused me to narrow mine.

“a bracelet that wasn’t even mine. plus you could’ve just given it to me when you first saw me,” i crossed my arms in front of my chest with a raised brow.

“oh c’mon, but where’s the fun in that?”

i pushed his shoulder, playfully only for him to laugh and hug me.

“i really just wanted to know if you were with someone else, so i wouldn’t make a fool of myself.” he whispered in my ear.

“you could’ve just asked,” i rolled my eyes even though he couldn’t see me.

“i wanted to be cool about it, ok? i had a reputation to maintain,” he joked but i knew he was a little serious. he’d been the epitome of a rich, arrogant, country club boy.

“i thought you were such an asshole.” who the fuck wears shades inside of a convenience store? you guessed it: rafe cameron.

he gasped in mock surprise, “you’re just saying that because you had the hots for me.”

“pfft, sure buddy. i think you’re projecting a little,” i laughed.

“i never said i didnt,” this time his tone was a little too serious making my heart beat faster.

“can we try this again?” he asked shyly.

i pondered for a moment before answering, “yes, but i want you to let me help you this time, ok?”

he moved his head to look me in the eye, “i promise.”

“ok, but wait. what about your father?” i’d somehow forgotten how he hated me now. or maybe always had.

“what about him? i’m an adult, i can make my own decisions. besides it’s none of his business. he’s the one that got us here in the first place.” his tone was now angry, which was rare when he spoke of his father. it was usually filled with frustration and sadness when it came to him. and i knew how important his father’s approval was to him.

“rafe, i don’t know. he’s still your father and i don’t want to come between you two,” i lowered my eyes so he wouldn’t see the tears threatening to spill.

he was silent for a moment before lifting my chin with his finger, frowning when he noticed my expression.

“you’re the love of my life. i’m not losing you again, ok? he’ll have to understand and i will talk to him. i’ll tell him how things really went down. plus, he isn’t innocent in any of this either.”

pursing my lips, i nodded. “ok” i didn’t really believe ward would be capable of changing his mind, but if it made rafe happy then i would try and compromise.

rafe searched for my eyes with a soft smile, “i love you.”

i returned the smile, “i love you too.”

he then got up to his feet, reaching his hand down to help me stand. after a few more kisses and a hug, he took me to his truck. we drove around with no particular destination in mind but with the sole purpose of being by ourselves without prying eyes and judging remarks.

i hoped deep down that i wasn’t making a mistake and that everything would be ok.

and as if on cue, “everything is going to be ok.” i turned my head in surprise at his words.

“don’t act so shocked, kid. i know you better than i know myself.” he then lifted my hand again and kissed it like he’d done on the boardwalk.

i chuckled and leaned my head back, closing my eyes. with the windows down, the ocean breeze, his hand drawing circles on the back of mine, and the soft music playing, i felt myself float away.

“sleep, angel. i love you.”

and then i woke up.

JK JK IT’S NOT A DREAM.

or is it? HEHEHEHEHE

ALSO WHY IS SHE SO CODEPENDENT??? LIKE GIRL STAND UP (says the one who wrote her 👯‍♀️)

anywayyyy, if you made it this far THANK YOU. I LOVE YOU!!!

please feel free to write comments or whatever, i love talking to you all 💞

and if you liked this check out my other stories!!

im currently writing a murder mystery kind of story and i only have two chapters for now, but i will make flashbacks with like text messages and diary entries and stuff. i’m trying to make it as if the reader is part of the investigation (I HOPE IM DOING A GOOD JOB) and i already have how i want the story to end but writing it is the hard part. like how long do i make it?? i don’t want to rush it but i really want to finish it because the characters take a mind of their own when i write. does that make sense? prob not lol

div creds!!- by @anitalenia

[mykoreanlove]

i need skz angst like rn??😭

hyunjin x female reader, and they maybe decide to go out to like a club or something, and some guy hits on the reader and hyunjin is like “you were flirting back!” and the reader is just very confused bc they tried to let the guy know as kindly as possible that they are taken, but hyunjin is still really mad and it results in them fighting

and then maybe hyunjin decides to go home but not like a shared apartment thing like he goes somewhere reader doesn’t know about

and then a day passes and he’s like “oh no i fucked up” and comes to readers apartment to apologize

happy ending? tysmmm🎀

I was like sure, let's writing something short and quick but somehow it turned into 6 pages lol. hope u enjoy it :)

The pros of being an insanely hot couple? A lot of sex and affection, a lot of people wanting to be like you and a lot of praise and admiration.

The cons of being an insanely hot couple? A lot of people trying to take your place, a lot of jealous envy and a lot of insecurity.

“Baby, you look incredible”, Hyunjin whispered into your ear as he hugged you from behind. You were standing in front of the mirror, admiring your look for the night. “I wanted to look good for you”, you shyly admitted as you leaned into him. “There is absolutely nothing you have to do to accomplish this, y/n. Nothing, you hear me?”

Ever since you met Hyunjin a couple of weeks ago your whole world turned around. You were used to dating a lot and having fun, but this was different. He was different. Both of you fell for the other rather quickly, a romance that revealed a hidden side within you.

“I want to kiss you so badly”, you whined.

“Why don’t you?”

Instantaneously, you pointed to your lips covered in deep ruby red.

“Ah”, he nodded understandingly. “Is it okay then if I do this?”, Hyunjin asked before kissing every inch of your collarbone, slightly sucking to mark his territory.

Hyunjin was a confident guy, knowing damn well that he was good looking and talented and still he felt conflicted at times. What if this was not enough? What if he was not enough for you? Since you were in your early dating stages, he never had vocalized his concerns, but his body did. His need to be near you, touch you and possess you was evident from the start.

“Jinnie, stop”, you giggled as you pushed him away.

Irritation grew on his face, not understanding why you were distancing yourself.

“I’m gonna be covered in marks that everyone is going to see”, you teased.

He felt his chest tighten. Did you not want others to see them? Did you want to be perceived as single? His own sparks of insecurity got ignited again, waiting to turn into a full-size fire.

The club was crowded with people of all kinds – dancers, jocks, hot models, a real feast for the eye. You were used to people turning their heads, especially when you were together with Hyunjin. It never bothered you that much since you knew how devoted he was to you.

“Can I tell you something?” You were laying on his chest, watching him breathe calmly. “Sure.” “I found your old DVDs in the basement, and I started watching them while you were at work. Binging them, really. And I saw something that really stuck with me”, he explained silently. “What was it?” “Ever thine. Ever mine. Ever ours”, he explained softly. You turned your head and gazed into his teary eyes. “We haven’t been together that long, I know. But this is exactly how I feel, y/n. I can’t imagine my life without you anymore. Cannot. Do not want to. Impossible.” You started tearing up as well, finally feeling at home with another soul. You placed a soft kiss on his plush lips and whispered: “I’ll be your Carry, baby.”

“Come dance with me”, you shouted as you pulled him to the dance floor. It was hot and sticky, but you didn’t mind, in fact you loved it like that. The music was energetic and vibrant, filling the whole room with energy and life force. You only had eyes for Hyunjin, watching his body move gracefully to the music. When he danced, he became one with the tunes, one with the movements. He smirked as he caught you staring, knowing damn well that you were weak for his dancing. As the song changed into a slower, sexier one you found yourself in front of him, grinding on his muscular body. All the other people were forgotten as you swayed your hips on him, feeling him getting hard behind you. His hands on your body and his hot breath on your neck was all you needed to know.

Hyunjin however was more prone to your surroundings. He enjoyed having you like that, but he hated sharing you with others. He was too aware of the other pair of eyes that was set on you. Like a reflex, he pulled you closer, grabbed a bit harder and provoked your surrender, demonstrating whom you belonged to.

“Fuck, baby, if you keep this up, we have to go”, you moaned into his ear.

“Let’s do that”, his whole face lit up. “Let’s get out of here, y/nnie.”

“But we just came?”, you whined in annoyance.

Hyunjin’s eyes darkened as his gaze pierced through you. Just like that, goosebumps formed on your skin, electricity cursed through your body making you feel all hot. He knew exactly what he was doing to you.

“I’m going to the bathroom really quick to fix this situation right here”, he said as he nodded to his crotch, “and when I come back, we leave, you hear me?”

You swallowed and nodded, already anticipating the night ahead.

“Good girl.”

He placed a kiss on your forehead and turned around, quickly looking for the bathroom.

You walked over to the exit and leaned against the cold wall, waiting for your boyfriend, already picturing him doing unspeakable things to you. You were so engulfed in your naughty daydreams that you didn’t even notice the guy from the dancefloor approaching you.

“Hey!”

“Oh, hi”, you replied politely.

“I saw you dancing earlier, damn you got moves!”, he complimented you.

“Thanks”, you replied drily.

“So uhm, would you like to have a drink with me?”

“No”, you shook your head.

“Why not?”

“Well, if you saw me dancing earlier you must have seen my boyfriend behind me, right? That’s why.”

“Shit, sorry. I kinda hoped that he was just another guy hitting on you.”

“Far from that.”

“He’s that great, huh?”

“Y/N”, Hyunjin called out angrily while glaring at the other guy.

You were taken aback by his tone, feeling anxious so you followed him without saying a word.

Fumingly, he marched to the car, while you were trying to keep up. Hyunjin placed both of his hands on the cold metal of the vehicle as he was trying to calm himself.

“Jinnie”, you called out softly.

“Don’t fucking call me that, y/n.”

“What?”

He turned around and faced you, his pupils were dilated, and his nostrils flared – he was angry as fuck.

“Don’t fucking call me that when you were flirting with some dickhead behind my back!”

“Are you serious right now?”

“Of course, I am. That bastard was eye-fucking you while we were dancing, and I left you alone for 5 minutes and you were already cozying up to him?”

“Cozying up to him? Cozying up to him? Are you out of your fucking mind?”

“What? I know what I saw!”

“Enlighten me, then. What did you see?”

“I saw you all smiley and giggly, you were practically shooting heart eyes emojis at him! Is that why you hated me giving you hickeys on your collarbone? So, everybody could see you were available?!”

You felt the punch to your stomach, making it harder to breathe. Every single word of his was laced in the most painful accusation, one that you had been familiar with way too often.

“Yeah, you’re right. I was flirting back and shooting heart eyes emojis at him. It was so much fun! And I was damn grateful that my body was free of your damn hickeys!”, you retorted angrily.

Hyunjin was about to explode, not being able to differentiate between your lies and his perceived reality.

Wordless, he turned around and got into the car. You looked at him one last time, hoping that he would come to his senses – but he didn’t. The loud sound of his engine disturbed the quiet of the night and not seconds later he was gone.

What should have been a fun night out for a young couple turned into a vicious disaster. One was crying hiding in the dirty toilet of a club, while the other was crying racing down the highway. Promises of forever love turned into accusations of unfaithfulness, painting your rosy world of adoration into black loneliness.

You had no idea how you made it back home, nor did you care. The following day was torture – you were ruminating over everything, trying to understand what had happened yesterday. Deep sadness filled your whole being. Hyunjin did not call, nor text. He vanished out of your life, just like he vanished into the night air yesterday. Was that it? Was it over?

“Damn, you look like shit. Why are your eyes so puffy?”

Hyunjin pulled the covers over his head, trying to dissolve into thin air.

“Hey, come on. Talk to me”, his friend encouraged him.

“I may have made the biggest mistake of my life yesterday.”

“Oh my god, did you cheat on y/n?”

“What? No. Of course not. I would never do that”, he explained.

“What did you do then?”

“I accused her of cheating on me.”

“Shit, sorry.”

“Don’t be. This was the last time I let my demons take over”, he mumbled as he left his room.

By evening, you felt better – at least good enough to go for a walk and clear your head. Minutes after you left Hyunjin appeared at your door – holding a giant bouquet of flowers in his trembling hands. He rang your door hundreds of times, knocked on it until his knuckles were swollen and called out for you until his throat was sore. But nothing.

Defeated, he slid down to the ground and thought of what to do.

“Y/N, I made a big mistake yesterday. I am so sorry. I should have never accused you of shit like that.”

He was wiping away his tears again, the thought of loosing you made his heart break every single time.

“You see I’m not perfect. Far from it. Yet somehow you seem to think that way. And I just… I just wait for the shoe to drop. For you to finally realize that I’m nothing special.”

“Jinnie”, you called out his name while stopping in front of your apartment. His eyes widened in surprise, immediately followed by relief. “You didn’t open up because you hated me but because you weren’t home…”

“Don’t flatter yourself, hate is on the top of the list right now”, you glared angrily.

He lowered his head in defeat.

“Are those for me?”, you nodded to the bouquet of flowers.

“Yes.”

You opened the door and passed by him. “Put them in a vase, then.”

Surprised, he got up on his feet and followed you inside.

“Can we talk?”

You sat across from him, giving him the cold shoulder.

“Talk.”

“Y/N, I am sorry. Please believe me, I am so sorry. I was seeing things, I let my insecurities win and I accused you of shit you didn’t do. Please, forgive me.”

“What did you think happened there?”

“I saw you guys talking and then I saw red. Like, you were smiling from ear to ear, practically shooting heart eyes emojis at him. I just, I just saw red.”

You sighed deeply, finally understanding where he was coming from.

“You’re right. I was shooting heart eyes emojis at him.”

“What?” Hyunjin’s heart was about to explode.

“But only because I was talking about you, Jinnie. He asked me out for a drink, and I explained to him that I already found the greatest guy on earth. I was gushing over you, like a freaking fan girl.”

“He’s that great, huh?” “Oh my god, yes. He is the greatest. No really, he is great at everything. Dancing, painting, loving? The best. He is also the kindest and loveliest guy I ever met. Always caring for the ones he loves. Never a dull moment with him. He makes me laugh so much. I swear I got abs because of him. And did you see how handsome he is? Fuck me, it’s like God created him himself and brought him to earth, so we could adore him. Fucking masterpiece, that man.” “Okay, okay, I got it”, the guy gave up. “Must be one hell of a lover.” “One hell of a lover. One hell of a soul. My soul, actually.”

“I feel like the biggest idiot right now”, he admitted ashamed.

“Yeah, you should feel like that.”

“I’m sorry, y/nnie. Can you forgive me?”

Silence lingered between the two of you, only for a moment, until you got up and walked over to him. You put your arms around his lean torso and hugged him tightly, willing to put this past you.

Hyunjin’s body finally relaxed, as he hugged you back. His lips landed on the crown of your head, simply resting there, and holding you close.

“Jinnie, wait. There is something else you need to know.”

He released you from his grip and looked at you anxiously.

“What is it?”

“When I was younger, I got bullied for hickeys. My first boyfriend always left them on my neck and the others harassed me for it, calling me slut and all sorts of names. So, it’s true, I don’t like them being visible.”

Hyunjin’s heart broke once more – for one because you had to endure this harassment, but also because he bullied you himself.

“I’m sorry, y/nnie. I won’t do that ever again.”

“Wait, no. I love your hickeys. I love your lips on me, I really do. But can we, maybe, agree to leave hickeys in places only we can see?”, you asked shily.

Hyunjin chuckled and pulled you in for a kiss, promising to do just that.

“I really meant what I said. I can’t imagine my life without you. I really can’t.”

You grabbed his hands and squeezed them, agreeing you felt the same way.          “I feel like we should talk about your insecurities, but I’m drained from last night.”

“Let’s relax for now, baby.”

“What do you want to do?”

Hyunjin’s lips turned upwards, forming the loveliest yet sneakiest smile.

“Okay, fine. I get the popcorn and you switch on the TV. Sex and the city marathon it is”, you rolled your eyes at him teasingly.

[weebsinstash]

hi! I cannot understand Val’s personality at all, and you’re my favorite writer for him, so I was wondering if you could tell me how he’d react in a situation where his darling is being harassed at a bar he’s not at? Like darling obviously has a tracker on their phone and they know it, but they also can’t leave the bar because that risks them getting kidnapped

maybe Val has already started calling them and leaving voicemails because they no showed, so you know that if you don’t call him and have an immediate reason for not responding you’ll probably be in for a very painful night, so you tell whoever is harassing you that you need to go into the bathroom, and it’s very obvious that they followed you but aren’t in the bathroom, so you just take out your phone and finally answer one of Val’s calls, and you make it obvious your crying, but you also hold the phone away from you so it doesn’t seem like you want Val to know your crying.

after that I’m kinda stuck on how he’d react, but if you’d rather not add to this it’s fine, this was part me wanting a response and part me wanting to tell someone my ideas

If it makes you feel better I also find Val's personality to be levels of inconsistent however I kinda interpret it being inconsistent because he's um an extremely emotional person and also an alcoholic addict and he's constantly pinballing between "oooo this will make me money" to "oh you've pissed me off PERSONALLY therefore I will rain fire upon you", like we have several instances of Valentino potentially sabotaging his business for kicks and Vox has had to reign him back in, and he still gives Angel actual fucking black eyes even when there's still filming, he doesn't even care about not leaving marks since everything will heal eventually

I feeeeeeeel like... it really depends on how his darling grovels to him and explains what is happening. You ditched him, you're out at a bar, you were ignoring his calls, and now you're telling him you're with another man. An abusive man would usually automatically assume "oh you're in a bar? Fucking slut trying to find other men, this is what you fucking get" but since we're having, you know. The Yandere Talk, I feeeeeel like.... it goes one of a few ways

One is he's absolutely pissed in general, at you, at the guy, just misfiring rage and snapping. You're bawling ti try and explain your situation and he snaps he can barely understand you because he can't regulate his anger and, it isn't INHERENTLY being mad at you, he's mad he can't understand you, but he's horrible at communicating that, so he shows up to rescue you and (unintentionally) has you trembling in fear of him because he's speaking to you like "where the fuck are you hurt?! Show me? Ugh, this bruise is huge, it's so fucking ugly, UGH-" and he's like not blaming you but is being so terrifying about it that, you're pretty convinced you'll be hit by him at any moment and maybe it would be you FLINCHING HARD at a sudden movement of his for him to, finally take a second to begrudgingly take a few deep breaths and his tone finally softens and he can stop freaking you out even more than you already are

Option 2 I see is that you answer the phone when he's in the 'love' of the love and the hate he switches between, so you catch him in the middle of one of his "baby you know I care so much about you, it just makes me a little wild when you leave me waiting" sort of voicemails. You finally pick up and you get this slightly catty "ohhhhh, look who it is,you remembered how to answer your phone! I missed you" and the second he can tell you're crying, you're just like, hearing all this stuff in the background and he sounds like he's been drinking but when is he ever NOT drinking "awwww, baby no, that's terrible! *heels clicking wayyy to fast for him to not be literally power walking his stiletto ass somewhere* I'm sure Daddy will be able to get everything sorted out *car door slams* and I'll show this lowlife fucking freak exactly what he deserves *moves the phone away from his mouth to HOLLER at his driver to 'get a fucking move on or I'll fucking kill you'* so don't you worry, ok baby? ❤️ make sure you stay on the phone with me, mhm? *click click click of him loading bullets into a magazine* so what's this motherfucker look like, he's uglier than me, right--"

And then I guess another unique outcome would be uh. You pick up the phone and he's just instantly shouting screaming fuming at you so much that he's like screaming for a few solid minutes before he's finally like "are you even gonna say anything you dumb whore?!" and that's when he finally hears your voice but it's not even your voice, it's your breathing, like you can barely even get any air out, like you're having a panic attack, you can barely even raise the volume of your voice above a whisper and your voice just keeps cracking and shaking, "v val" and like, the very first SYLLABLE out of your mouth he knows something is BIG WRONG because you sound TERRIFIED and you can barely even speak, "some-someone's outside the bathroom.... he says he'll hurt me... I don't know what to do....!" and like that's it. It takes Val from 100 to 0 real fast. He goes from "if you're not on your way home in five fucking minutes-" to "what did you just say" and he's completely quiet as you're like struggling to speak, "i-i'm in-in a stall, but he's... OUTSIDE.... WAITING..." and you just sob with a hand over your mouth but he can still hear it and he's already on his way

Do you think Val knows how to fight and I mean like BRAWL. Valentino's still on the phone with you and he can barely even hear you and he suddenly hears the man's voice, he's come INTO the bathroom now, he's OUTSIDE your stall, antagonizing you, scaring you, grabbing the top of the door and shaking it like it's nothing. You're SCREAMING because you're in A FUCKING STALL and he could either rip the hinges off or just like COME UNDER OR OVER and then you're done for so you're like TERRIFIED WAILING I mean shrieking like a murder victim because oh god oh god oh god you're gonna double die--- and you just hear the door to the bathroom get kicked open and the guy is just like RIPPED away from your stall and CHAOS follows. You hear all these thudding, smashing, crashing, breaking sounds and when you finally hear nothing but Val's voice telling you to come out he's just standing there covered in blood and the dude is on the floor with his face an unrecognizable SLUDGE because Val grabbed him by the back of the neck and slammed his face into the edge of the sink until it was knocking teeth out of his mouth. Valentino is over here, reaching for you looking like that scene from The Witch of Mercury

Except unlike in Mercury you're like, only temporarily in stunned silence before you're like, RUSHING to be held by him because you're just scared and bawling and he SAVED YOU and you're so happy you didnt get hurt. Like the duality of him touching you to comfort you but probably getting blood on you maybe even ALL OVER YOU because he's just touching you that much and you're clinging to him that much

I feel like there are times where Val may intentionally NOT save you to use it as some sort of punishment/lesson to manipulate you with later but I feel like the ways in which he would knowingly allow his darling to be hurt are nuanced and contextual. He'd pay a guy to mug you and rough you up to teach you a lesson about leaving the studio on your own, or set up a fake kidnapping, but you come back into the studio ACTUALLY hurt? Stabbed, limping, whatever? He's furious. No one gets to hurt you. Everyone in this entire fucking circle of Hell should know who you belong to by this point and if they're hurting you, they're disrespecting HIM

..... and also you're his cute widdle baby and he doesn't want his boo getting hurt, at least not in a non fun non sexy way 🥺❤️ see sweetie, this is exactly why you should listen to him at all times and never argue with him on anything ❤️

[hanjisunglover]

𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐒 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌 - Han Jisung

pairing: han jisung x chubby fem!reader

genre: fluff, best friends to lovers

summary: y/n always hated her body, she doesn't like her thick thighs, or the way her tummy looks, her arms, her face more round than the others. she tried so much to change in the years but every diet was nothing, jisung on the other side loves her with all of her heart.

Jisung it's like your safe space.

You know that with him you feel safe, he's not gonna judge you if you wear a pair of shorts, he's not gonna stare at you with different eyes if you're changing in front of him, because you guys knows each other since you guys were middle school. You can tell that the way that he's looking at you that he's feeling safe and comfortable too. But..

But you still feel like someday, he's gonna wake up and change his mind, deciding to leave your side. To walk out of your life like nothing really happened and you're gonna be heartbroken after loosing your only friend and only person that you ever loved.

That what insecurity is. You feel like everything it's fine for a short time, and then your thoughts are sticking in your mind, filling your mind with things that normally you wouldn't thinking about jisung or you.

You are in front of the mirror, your shirt lightly move up to reveal your tummy, chubbier than other people. Your thighs that are thick and something that you always felt insecure in, covering them with long and baggy pants. Your hips that are more curvy than others, you just feel that everything on you it's too much. too much to handle, too much to love.

"y/n? whatcha doin?" Jisung's voice makes your shirt goes down again and your cheeks slowly get red, he caught you as you were hating every single inch of your skin. "nothin, waiting for you."

His eyebrow moves up, giving you a suspicious face that you wash off with a fake smile, you move your shirt as down as possible. "you're being weird, why?"

You shake your head, walking toward the bed as you press your lips together, squeezing your thick thighs together, just the movement makes jisung blush. He loves the feeling of your skin against his, it's just refreshing for him. He put his phone away and he sits next to you, with a light smile.

That's when you start to talk, "I just, you know that I don't like my body," jisung's hand reach your thigh, squeezing it in his fingers as he pass his thumb over and over your smooth and warm skin. Because just the touch makes him feel so alive. "yeah and literally I don't understand why."

His chuckles surprises you, his hand feels so good against your skin that you almost forgot what you were so mad about your self. "what? you cannot be serious, this is gross-"

"This, is what I love the most about you," His voice it's like honey straight out from the battle, making you blush because you never thought that Jisung could see you like that, "it's, cute.. and ugh, adorable. it's soft, I can hold so much when I hug you."

He moves his arms around your waist, making you blush harder when he gets so close to you, his head lean on your shoulder as you get so shy and blushy, "you.. are damn gorgeous, pretty girl."

"I'm not," you whispers, almost too quiet for him to actually get what you said but it's fine, cause jisung always knows what to do or say to make you feel right. He stroke your back with one hand as he lift you up like nothing, "w-woah.. hey let me go."

Your eyes are wide open as you look at him, your cheeks red as he place you on his lap, you try your best to let you not totally on his thighs, to not let him really feel how heavy you can be. His hands finish on your hips pushing you down. "Sit damn comfortably y/n, com'on it's just me."

He murmurs as he moves some hair from the way, looking in your eyes with a deep affection, your breath get sharply as you try to not say anything back; cause it's a real dead war. You're never gonna change his mind about that, he's too stubborn. "listen I, I really love you. Not because of your body - even if I love this damn curves more than you can imagine - or because your look. I love you because you are you. I love you. I love your talk. the way that you explain things to me even if I already know them, the little giggle that you make when I share music with you. Your fingers between my hair, you're sing when I play the guitar, you are the movies that you quote and the smile in your face. you're my person."

[ireadwithmyears]

You’ll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline

written for the summer of bad batch 2024 challenge, week two. @summer-of-bad-batch

word count:1.4 K

prompt: injured

A swimming lesson on Pabu goes wrong. Luckily, Omega has great brothers who are there for her when her attempt to do something beyond her skill level to look impressive backfires. (Title lyrics are from Robin by Taylor Swift)

Tags/warnings: descriptions of minor injuries/blood, minor descriptions of medical procedures/stitches, fluff, hurt/comfort.

also read on AO3

Omega, I need to see it, kid. Just let me have a look.”

Echo’s voice is kind and even, but still holds the signature arc trooper “that was an order” tone that he uses when he’s asking for something non-negotiable. It holds absolutely no room for argument, in spite of how much she wants to

Hunter, for his part, is holding her in his arms, feeling her sniffling and whimper against his chest, and wondering what the hell happened. 

It had been a simple, straightforward swimming lesson, beneath Pabu’s serene skies and warm sun as they swam in calm waters. Omega already knew how, but her technique and endurance could use work. On an island, surrounded by water and waves and the opportunity, she had excitedly jumped at the suggestion when Tech had proposed it, seeing it as an alternative to her normal educational study time. He could tell that being surrounded by nature and so many new things to explore was making her antsy and unable to focus on her normal tasks. So this had been his compromise.

A compromise that he was quickly coming to regret, as he joggs back towards the Marauder to retrieve their medkit. 

They had taught her how to properly jump, off the side of the dock, always under careful supervision for now so that one of them could check the alignment of her toes before she jumps, to ensure its success on the takeoff. 

He cannot begin to understand what, exactly, had possessed her to attempt jumping off the side of the dock backwards when everyone’s back was turned, nor does he pretend to. 

“Come on, ad’ika. Echo just wants to have a look, that’s all,” Wrecker encourages, gently coaxing her face upward by cupping her cheek in one of his large hands, being very careful to avoid her chin.

Her chin that is now split open by a large gash from when it had collided against the hard dock, the result of not pushing back far enough when she had taken the jump.

Wrecker cringes at the site, letting out a sympathetic hiss and ruffling her still wet hair.

Echo, for his part, winces but is otherwise unfazed, having seen much worse as he carefully inspects the damage. “It’s deep enough to need stitches,” he reports, gently tilting her head back.

Her eyes, that had up until this point been leaking with silent tears, quiet sobs occasionally escaping her lips, go wide, and she sharply turns to bury herself back against Hunter’s chest, seeming to shrink and attempt to hide against him.

“No,” her voice is high-pitched and frantic with fear. “No. Hunter, I’m sorry, please don’t be mad. I didn’t mean to, please I don’t, I don’t want stitches please.” 

Her cries are insistent and pleading, words escaping in a rush that he’s pretty sure he can only understand because of his enhanced senses, and his heart breaks for her, even as he shakes his head regretfully.

“Hey, no, hey, shh. I’m not mad, Omega. I promise, no one is mad at you. You just made a mistake, kiddo, that’s all, happens to all of us,” he soothes, words whispered softly against her forehead as he holds her to him, gently rocking her back and forth. “But, kid, there’s no avoiding stitches. It won’t be able to heal properly without them.”

“B but that still means needles,” she whimpers, and he’s not sure if she’s trembling so violently because the water has made her cold, or if she’s genuinely that scared. Regardless, before he has room to answer, Tech is there, unpacking supplies with a practiced, familiar ease of someone who’s done this many times before.

“Which is why I will ensure you are sufficiently numbed beforehand,” he interjects.

She doesn’t mean to flinch away from Tech, really, she doesn’t. She knows it’s Tech, it’s her brother, and he’s going to keep her safe and ensure that her injury is treated with the upmost of care.

But being raised as a Kaminoen science experiment, the familiar sound of the catch the medkit makes as it opens makes her entire body go rigid, stiffening within hunters arms as she hides her face against his shoulder, heedless of the blood. She must make some sort of noise, some pathetic whimper that she is beyond caring about, because Hunter, his hand gentle as it cups the back of her head and smoothes over her hair, speaks softly.

“Come on, ner cyar,” he coaxes, gently shushing her noise of protest as he moves to re-situate her in his lap, holding her with her back pressed against his chest, his arms wrapping around her securely. “Tech isn’t gonna let anything bad happen to you, sweet,” he promises, only feeling her settle when his lips press to the top of her head, leaving several soft kisses just to pull The ghost of a smile out of her.

“I d didn’t mean to,” she repeats, sniffling softly as she looks up at Tech, eyes watery.

“I would imagine not,” he says dryly, using a cotton pad to gently dab numbing gel over the long, jagged cut. “One would assume that you would not intentionally smash your chin off a hard wooden dock while attempting to jump off the side of it backwards,” he quips, and there’s an amusement in his voice that makes her giggle in spite of herself, his lips almost imperceptibly pulling into a smile when he hears it.

Her cheeks flush with embarrassment, and she averts her eyes.

“We all make mistakes and errors in judgment, Omega,” he says steadily, carefully beginning to clean the wound, removing small splints of wood and debris from the dock with a set of tweezers, observing her face for any signs of discomfort as he works.

“You don’t,” she points out, raising a sceptical eyebrow at him.

Tec Looks thoughtful as he responds, gently dabbing at the cut with a disinfectant. 

“Perhaps, the errors I make are not as frequent nor perceptible discrepancies now,” he allows. “But that does not mean that I am in fallible. I can assure you, I am not above making mistakes, despite my exceptional mind often times preventing me from making such errors,” he says with a smile. “And perhaps Wrecker can regale you with some of my most noteworthy risks that I thought had been calculated at the time, but in hindsight, were not as well thought out as I had initially intended.”

Wrecker, who is a naturally energetic and engaging storyteller, takes the hint, observing his brother reaching for the local anaesthetic. He leans forward with a mischievous gleam in his eye, gaining the child’s focus and holding it so well that she doesn’t even notice when Tech

Injects around the cut with the numbing agent. 

Tech issues a soft warning as he prepares to thread the needle through, asking her to tell him if she feels any discomfort Beyond slight pulling and pressure, so that he may administer more local anesthetic, if needed. She nods, eyes nervous and wary, but as promised, she has been sufficiently numbed. 

They get through the sutures easily this way, his brothers occasionally chiming in to add in details, or Tech, eyes never leaving the wound as he closes it intently, corrects something one of them had said that was, in his opinion, extremely over exaggerated, or factually just entirely wrong.

The brothers, all working together to describe their days as cadets, outlining their own mistakes they had made and stupid injuries they had gotten as a result, are so good at keeping her occupied, that at several points, Tech has to remind her to keep her chin still in spite of her urge to laugh or smile, patiently pulling the sutures through her skin.

When he’s finished, expertly tying a knot at the end of the row of sutures to hold them together, he gives her a smile. 

“Well done, Omega,” he says softly. “You did well.” 

She sniffs, giving him a small smile and a knot before pressing her head back against Hunter’s chest, looking up at him after a moment with pleading tooka eyes, still watery with the remnants of tears and even before she asks, he knows he won’t be able to say no to whatever she’s about to beg for.

“Did did I do well enough to deserve an ice cone as a treat?” She asks, voice small and hopeful.

“Yes,” Tech is the one to respond, voice matter-of-fact but pleased smile on his face. “I believe that an ice cone would be an acceptable reward.” 

Hunter lets out an exaggerated grown, pretends to roll his eyes and smack a hand against his forehead in defeat, then picks her up into his arms, holding her close. 

“If it’s ice cones you want,” he grumbles playfully, gently bouncing her just to hear her laugh and smile. “Then ice cones you shall have.”

[lastoneout]

I actually do think like the basis of the argument biphobes use about bi people only facing homophobia and never facing any backlash when we are single or in an m/f relationship is because they just fundamentally do not understand what bisexuality actually is and don't care to correct that.

Bi people have been screaming forever about how we aren't half and half anything, we are an entire new identity based on being attracted to multiple genders, but the queer biphobe doesn't believe that. They see us as half gay and half straight. Without even realizing it they are openly admitting they do not listen to bi people when we talk about our identity and then they weaponize their willful ignorance to harm AND silence us at the same time.

They do not conceptualize us as a new identity, we're basically just a fucking math problem to them(and since these types also tend to lean aphobic and truscum and radfem they think of all oppression like a math problem, but I digress). Like their logic goes: no one hates people in straight relationships but they do hate gay ones, and gay people obviously would never hate another gay person for being gay just like straight people would never hate you for being straight, so you are clearly only experiencing homophobia and maybe some misogyny and that ONLY comes from cishet people, any "bigotry" coming from the queer community is just you being a whiny homophobic loser with passing privilege who is pretending to be oppressed and mad gay people don't want to date you because again, you can only be hated for your gay half and gay people don't(or can't) hate other gay people for being gay.

But there's no math to do. You can't do math on oppression anyway, but bi people are not half anything. Again, we are a whole new identity in of itself. "Half gay and half straight" is not the definition we use, we have almost NEVER used it except in like, jokes and memes and shit. The way we define ourselves is as people who expirience attraction to two or more genders, and that doesn't even always mean being attracted to both men and women! There are loads of genders, bi doesn't inherently mean men and women and thus "half gay half straight" can NEVER be a definition that encompasses all of us. And you'd KNOW that if you actually LISTENED to us.

We are hated because our society still expects people to be attracted to one gender. Even in monosexual queer spaces there is the expectation that you only like women or only like men or only like nonbinary/genderqueer people, you HAVE to pick one. Refusing is deviation from the norm and is punished with violence and exclusion and bigotry from BOTH sides. And until biphobes can finally get their heads out of their asses and actually LISTEN to us when we do something as basic as DEFINE WHO WE ARE ON OUR OWN TERMS WITH OUR OWN LANGUAGE they will never be able to accept the existence of biphobia or their ability to take part in it.

They don't believe it exists because deep down, they don't believe bi people exist. We're just two identities in a trenchcoat, that can be easily divided with simple oppression math. We are not whole people with a whole new identity, we're a gay person and a straight person trapped in the same body, pretending to be something we aren't, facing "half" the oppression, if that(OR we're really just a confused gay or straight person who will figure it out eventually and give up that "bi" nonsense). And they don't care if they're wrong because that would mean they're bigoted and doing harm and they can't possibly accept that they are capable of being bigoted and causing harm, especially to other queer people.

Anyway, listen to bi and other multisexual people when we talk about our identities and problems. It's not hard. We're begging for people to take us and our problems seriously instead of pretending we don't exist or trying to fit us into a framework that cannot fully express our existence and acting like that means we can't be oppressed for being attracted to multiple genders. And tbh I don't think that being biphobic is something you can't come back from, but you have to sit down, shut up, LISTEN TO US, realize that you don't fully understand what you're talking about, accept that you have held harmful beliefs, and then work to be better.

It's hard, but bi people need allies. So please, at the very least just listen to us when we tell you who we are and what we go through. Just listen.

[kingmagnificoofrosas]

Further proof of Our King's anxiety and trauma: His body language. He has a habit of putting his hands behind his back. It's a self-soothing and self-preservation gesture. But then when he's more relaxed, he doesn't do that.

Case in point: Look when he meets Asha. At first you don't see his hands. They're behind his back. When he does bring a hand out briefly, it goes behind his back again. But when he warms up to her, his hands come out.

The same goes with when he's addressing his people about the magic. His hands are behind his back, and they stay there unless he brings one hand out to do something and then he puts it right back. He's uncomfortable, he's guarded and it shows.

Which is why his people should have known that something was VERY wrong when he came out on stage possessed. His body language was VERY different. He was stumbling around drunk, but his hands were both visible. His body language had drastically changed because he was essentially inebriated on dark magic. That should have been a BIG clue in that something was WRONG, not that the king was suddenly evil.

YES! THIS! 🤌🏼

I've been stressing from the beginning about this! While hands loosly clasped in the back can be a sign of confidence and relaxtion, Magnifico's way of hiding his arms is different most of the time.

Now, I have always been good at reading people but then I studied psychology for a while and trauma conditions, the mental impact it has and how it shows.

Magnifico oozed trauma the very first minute I saw him. And when he mentioned what happened, plus the burned wall-rug, I knew it was deep! All his behavior clicked for me.

That is also a big part why haters villanizing him gets me fuming mad. If I was to follow their logic, then Elsa is a villain for running away and leaving her kingdom to freeze die, or Maui, who stole Tefiti's heart and caused destruction, or abuela Alma, for treating Mirabel like trash, or Imelda for forbitting music in her family, Abuela Elena for smashing Miguels guitar!

The hypocrisy is off the charts!

And the worst thing is exactly what you mentioned last. The people of Rosas not being able to see that something was horribly wrong with their king. He was so clearly not himself and no one gave a toot. It's easy to explain though. The didn't know their own king and nor did they care. All they cared about was their wishes. Their needs. Their desires. Magnifico was just their source for favors and when that well ran dry, they dropped him like a stone. Talking about selfishness!

Magnifico was never evil. Did he make some wrong choices because of his trauma? Yes. But nothing he ever did made him a villain. The only villain there was, was the book! The book, or rather, the evil force/entitiy in in! And yes, we saw that demon-thing drawn on the page. Not to forget the green clawed hands! No, magic itself isn't a conscious living, thinking being, it's a supernatural ability used by a fessel. And as a christian I can tell you the only thing behind "dark magic" are demons.

You will see this whole topic deeper explained in the upcoming cooperation post "the Magnifico case". But here is a little thing from it.

This isn't Magnifico

This is!

This isn't him

This is!

The fact that people cannot differentiate between this and understand what a possession is ...

Anyway. Anothing very interesting thing I wanna draw attention to is what comes out of Magnifico's mouth once he is full on possessed. He says things that are 100% contradictory to everything he stood for and fought for.

See the reflection thing in the fountain? It's where the quote "I win!" Falls! Why is this so deeply unsettling? Because there is nothing he won! All Magnifico ever truly wanted was happiness and savety for others around him. Magnifico's trauma had caused him to be immensly fearful and paranoid when it came to the savety of others because what happened to him left scars in his soul as deep as a canyon and he wanted no one else to ever have to suffer like he did. He didn't want power, he didn't want fame! He only wanted what's best for others and in return get some love and respect for what he did. Which, yes, he deserved anyway!

Back to my two cents of my christian opinion. It's pretty clear that the evil side does nothing but steal, kill and destroy. It's all it ever wants. To hurt and wreck. That thing that has been trapped in that book must have waited eagerly for who knows how long to get a victim it can use to destroy and use to destroy. So when that thing had taken control over Magnifico's clear consciousness, it obviously said "I won!"

Even sadder is that we could see the exact moment, the entity leaves Magnifico and he is left with confusion and panic because all he sees are the wishes floating away into the nightsky.

Also, where did the green enter and leave? Into and from his heart!

This is the same fear only increased!

And NO! God NO! It is not "Ah, no, I don't wanna lose my power and control over the people because I'm a malicious beast and I wallow in their suffering and enjoy them not being able to make one of their wishes come true!"

No. Just. No. This is ignorant, this is stupid nonsense. This is seeing evil where there is none. This is villanizing trauma!

And then some people go "Oh God, what a monster! What a evil man! Poor kid! It deserves to swim! How dare he not let the kid swim!"

Compare this to a father, who previously had lost a brother or even his first child to a drowning accident. Now the next child is old enough to swim and is running towards the water. Everyone knows the kid will jump in, swim and have fun, but all the father can think of is the potential danger of his child drowning as well. Maybe it will get a cramp, or a shark will bite it, or it gets stung by a jellyfish, steps on a venomous sea urchin, gets a heart attack, gets pulled away by a current ...

You see where I'm going?

And then the father runs, sweaps the child in his arms and forbids it to go near the water and swim because it is too dangerous. He tells his child.

"You stay here with me, as long as I deem it saver! I'm your father, it is my responsibility to keep you as safe as I can! I only want the best for you!"

And of course the child is pouty.

"

"Well, if there is a shark, it can be stopped. I might just bite one leg off of the child ...oh well...The father clearly doesn't know what he's doing! And I must know, I don't even have children!"

"Everyone call the police! Let's put this father behind bars! He's so cruel and abusive to his poor child!"

"And good heavens! He snapped at the child for saying it is old enough to decide if it wants to swim or not! And he replied that he decides if the child swims or not! What a narcissistic psychopath! He needs to be stopped!"

Anyway, I'm very excited to soon share that big boy of a post with you, where I dive into each and every aspect as deep as ever with the help of Magnificolover from instagram. 🎶

How does that sound? And now imagine one of these judgemental, entiteled, selfrighteous, ignorant people calling the police. And the police arrests the man and no one at the beach does anything. No one thinks "wait a minute! This is wrong!"

I can already smell the haters cooking new arguments 😂 feeling snubbed at their toes cause we defenders are right! And you know what? We will only get louder! We are already the vast majority! Including children!

They're mad at us and our defense? Good! Maybe then it is time to ask themselves why it is that the majority is on Magnifico's side! Or why children starting by the age 5 (my cousins son for example) can clearly conclude that the only reason Mags went nuts is because of the evil book. Better yet, they see that Asha and the people of Rosas are in the wrong how they treat their king. And children are brutally honest.

Stay loud my fellow defenders! 🔥

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 5 part 5

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

jen just shakes her head, bitter and not in the least surprised at what agatha did

meanwhile agatha is... she's just devastated

billy is the only person in the room who has never experienced and still doesn't comprehend the finality of death

agatha runs, she can't do anything else. rio is the only one that cares.

she looks so pathetic in that getup. her behaving like a little girl is not so funny anymore, is it?

as always, rio watches her. she has a lot to think about after this trial.

but alice needs her undivided attention now. lady death has to clock in.

I'm glad that we keep focusing on agatha's reaction. she used to be able to kill people and shake it off (or at least pretend to). she cannot shake alice off

and it was all for a tiny spark of magic. that is all that's left of alice on the mortal plane

when billy confronts her she visibly recoils and shrinks in on herself, like a child caught with her hand in the cookie jar

one hand on her own heart, one on billy's heart. like she's begging and willing him to understand

it's not: you lied. it's you lied to me. it's personal. it's the trust he had in a mentor and mother figure, irrevocably broken

agatha never lies to billy. she's shitty with him in many other ways, but she doesn't lie

billy, honey. you set out on a road trip with a literal serial killer.

agatha had this mad fantasy of billy and her becoming a family, a coven two. and of course she went and ruined it. she always does

jen has all her walls firmly up, she won't allow herself to grieve for alice. she's still on the verge of walking a dark path, and agatha is the one pushing and pushing her toward it

lilia, who has lost and grieved so many, is just numb with pain. Death is unstoppable. hey guys, remember the first three episodes? when everything seemed so fun and carefree?

to billy witches were spellbooks and broomsticks and hot topic eyeliner. how do you explain to a kid the ugliness and violence and trauma that will inevitably fester in a marginalized, repressed community?

from the mouth of a child. she might have killed alice by accident. she has been deliberately and systematically killing many more to serve her own agenda.

and what agatha does, when confronted with ugly truths? she runs, and if she can't run, she goes all in with the spectacle and the cruelty

she could have picked any moment to talk about wanda. she could have broken the news gently, eased billy into understanding what he's been doing. now she's just lashing out in anger and fear and pain. billy did just put her through hell, but she's still the only adult of the two, no matter how immature she wishes to act

when push comes to shove, when it all becomes too much, agatha will latch to her self-preservation instincts and choose to protect herself over anyone else, even the people she loves. She's doing it with billy, she's doing it with rio. I'd argue that she did it with nicky, too.

hey, hey agatha, remember what happened the last time you poked a chaos witch with a stick? you dumb idiot.

fucking around meets finding out etc etc etc etc

boy is she SCREAMING. this bitch will never go down quietly, she'll snivel and cry like the sad pathetic creature she is

and the parallels and the irony of billy hurting jen and lilia in his grief.

do you guys laugh too when bille ellish pops in?? I love how agatha later says that billy is dramatic because he's a maximoff. honey, wanda was only ever coming up with cute sitcom scenarios. this is all your doing, you and your dramatic ass. this is your son. drama queen and drama queen in training.

go to episode 6 part 1

[listslistslists]

ℍ𝕠𝕘𝕗𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣

a collection of lines from Hogfather by Terry Pratchett, use as you wish, adjust as needed

Don’t get afraid, get angry.

That's what we do to monsters.

You wish someone inhumed?

True, after a few minutes of talking to him your eyes began to water and you felt you needed to scrub your skin even on the inside, but no one was perfect, were they?

If I catch you being twee again, I will knot your arms behind your head.

I don't seem to have any enemies at all. Not one. Isn't that nice?

It really hurts to think I might not be among friends.

We're all friends here!

Sorry? That was very rude of me. I wasn't paying attention.

We're not going to be intimidated by the certain prospect of complete and utter failure.

This is a friendly warning, understand?

I don't want you back in my life, understand?

You make it look so easy.

Come along, Mr. Wizard.

I'm your worst nightmare!

This is Hogswatch! It's supposed to be jolly, with mistletoe and holly, and - and other things that end in olly!

I don't know what's going on, but you can all leave again, right? This is my life. It doesn't belong to any of you.

Are you keeping well? Self-reliant? Making your own way in the world?

I am sorry. I cannot tell you. Forget you saw me. It's not your business.

I still have a lot to learn about humans, don't I?

Oh, so suddenly you're Mr. Orthinologist, are you?

Y'know, that could've been done with a bit more ceremony.

We don't think we're going to get in trouble over this, do we? All this is not exactly… authorized.

Stop that! You'll frighten the kiddies!

They're supposed to thank you.

You're supposed to say thank you. And be good. This is part of the arrangement.

Look, shall we end this charade?

Even gods have to move with the times.

That's the thing about gods. They always find a way to, you know… hang on.

The damn sun comes up anyway.

I've seen some bad places in my time, but this takes the serious biscuit.

He’s just like a little boy, you know. Inside. Always has been.

Yeah, well, I didn't sign up for world domination. That sort of thing gets you into trouble.

Have you got any idea how to get back home?

I think leaving would be a very good idea around now, don't you? This place is going to fall apart.

You haven't been having a festive drink, have you, sir?

You think that will look bad?

Hard to see how it could look good.

That statement is either so deep it would take a lifetime to fully comprehend every particle of its meaning, or it is a load of absolute tosh.

He’s not dead. He's just resting.

You utter, utter bastard! I hate you hate you hate you hate you-

I thought it was the season to be jolly.

Let go, you wretched creature!

You know you're not supposed to do this sort of thing, ___. You know what happened last time.

That's how the story goes, ‘s not my fault.

Looks like we've been chosen to do a bit of charity.

It's sort of gone a little bit mad.

What do you call that warm feeling you get inside?

A more positive attitude would assist at this point, thank you so very much.

It's nice to do a job where people look forward to seeing you.

What good’s a God who gives you everything you want?

What an odd question.

We don't want to be Mr. Grumpy, do we?

Would it hurt anyone just occasionally try to be a little bit cheerful?

It wasn't stealing. It was just… redistribution.

I didn't know there was going to be all this creepy stuff! I want to go home!

Who would you expect to come down a chimney on a night like this?

I don't frighten easily, but you'd be amazed at how angry I can become.

I didn't want anyone to hurt them… I never wanted to hurt them.

You look terrible.

This is a hell of a way to spend Hogswatch.

It is not over. More must be done.

Did you see any bright lights? Was there a shining tunnel? Did any deceased relatives attempt to speak to you?

It's the things you believe which make you human.

He knows how to die. He's had lots of experience.

If I fall now, I don't deserve to be caught.

Who wants some?! Anyone else?

It gets under your skin, life.

Fear, too, is an anchor.

You were sure I was going to survive, were you?

Its been a long night, ___! I'm tired and I need a bath! I don't need silliness!

A cup of cocoa would be appropriate in the circumstances.

[geneviveleocardius]

maegor targaryen headcanons

he has a thing for you

maegor is as cruel and distant as ever, his world shaped by a need for power and dominance. however, his twisted love for you, his half-sister, is something he can never escape. from the moment he saw you, there was an undeniable pull—one he could neither control nor understand. this love has always existed, buried beneath layers of pride and cruelty.

he married you in a way that was cold and merciless—using his strength and authority to bend you to his will. but even in his brutality, there was a sliver of regret. the union was born from his desire to claim what was his, but his heart recoiled at the thought of harming you. his twisted affection leaves him conflicted.

maegor never spoke of love, not in the conventional sense. he saw emotions as weaknesses, but with you, it’s different. his love is hidden beneath a mask of control, anger, and dominance. it’s a love he’s never admitted, but one that is painfully obvious in the way he treats you.

despite his coldness, maegor spoils you with the finest luxuries. the jewels, the silks, the grand halls—none of it is for your beauty alone. it’s his way of making up for the darkness that clings to him. his twisted form of care is in the details: the rare gifts no one else receives, the knowledge that you are his in every way, and he will ensure nothing harms you.

his love for you is a slow-burning obsession, one he’s never been able to free himself from. from the moment of your birth, he saw you as different from the rest, his sister in ways others could never be. it’s a bond that goes beyond the realms of what is deemed “normal,” rooted deep in the chaos of his own mind.

maegor is not one for softness, but when no one is watching, he finds himself seeking your presence. when you’re alone, he’ll watch you from the shadows, his eyes tracing your every movement. it’s not possessiveness—it’s more than that. a need to be near you, to keep you in his sight, to ensure no harm befalls you.

his cruel actions may remain, but they are not without consequence. in private, he often catches himself, haunted by his own moral failing. his guilt surfaces in ways he cannot control—softening his gaze when he looks at you, offering words of praise or reassurance that even he doesn’t understand.

despite his cruelty, he’s your protector in the only way he knows how. his love is warped by the world he lives in, but it’s there—hidden in the layers of his obsession, his fear, and his twisted devotion. the thought of losing you drives him to madness.

maegor may never speak of his love, but it’s in the way he watches you from afar, the way he keeps you at arm’s length but also refuses to let anyone else touch you. his jealousy, though never voiced, is a reflection of his own infernal obsession.

his love, though monstrous, is all-consuming. in his own twisted way, you are the only one who truly understands him, and despite his cruel nature, he cherishes you in the only way he knows how—through control, through power, through everything he is.