#you can continue this in a thread if you want; but asks also work <3 whatever is easier for you
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zoomingupthathilla · 11 months ago
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He poked his head into Max's room. The rest of the trailer was empty, the sun had long since gone down. Everything was far too eerily quiet which only made Billy's anxiety seem to ramp up. "Maxine. You got a minute?"
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//we sorta plotted a thing, and by "plotted" we were like "wouldn't it be great if.." so here it is! I'm doing the thing!!
Max was laying upside down, half of her body off of the side of the bed. A mass of red curls touching the floor. It had been one of those days, she was just existing. Trying to get out of the slump that she was in. Playing with the wheel to one of her boards. Seeing how fast she can get it to spin...
Hearing his voice, she peeked up at him cautiously. Nothing good came when her full name was used. "I may have a few." She teased, trying to cut through the thick cloud of tension that was quickly forming.
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Finally sitting up, as her curiosity got the best of her..
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avis-writeshq · 8 months ago
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hello 😘 aaron hotchner drabble request!
anything with jealousy and possessiveness but in a natural normal way not a joe goldberg way haha
and also - aaron sees you wearing his hoodie/shirt drabble!
thank you and your work is amazing!
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pairing: aaron hotchner x bau!fem!reader genre: established relationship, aaron is a little (a lot) upset warnings: misogynistic moron >:( reader wears a skirt, if you get the reference ily a/n: i wrote it and the more i wrote the more i realised that it... really isn't the same at all :( if you want me to redo it, please send me an ask !! thank you lovely <3 wc: 631
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“You would think that he would know by now,” Emily hums, her tone disapproving and mostly disappointed as she watches from a distance as Captain Pembroke attempts to chat you up. 
“He’s a captain?” Spencer asks in genuine amazement. 
“For NYPD’s major crime unit,” JJ confirms, her arms crossed over her chest. “He tried to hit on Emily a couple days ago, and on Amy from the fourth floor. I wouldn’t be surprised it he has some sort of sealed file on him.”
Emily scoffs a little, rolling her eyes. “Sounds like a charmer.”
“The bigger question is, does Hotch know?” Derek pipes up as he glances in your direction.
“Well…” JJ lets out a nervous laugh. “I kind of hope he doesn’t.”
You offer a curt smile in Pembroke’s direction, doing everything in your power to subtly signal that you really should be leaving. Fiddling with the loose threads of your shirt, averting eye contact, taking tiny steps away in hopes that he’ll somehow get the message. It isn’t surprising that he doesn’t. 
“I beat my PR yesterday, you know,” he brags, flexing his muscles. You think you’re about to throw up as he continues, “129. Impressive, right, hun?”
“The average amount of pounds an untrained man can lift is 135,” you respond dismissively in an attempt to lean into Spencer’s way of getting people to leave him alone, but Pembroke doesn’t seem to hear you. 
“You know, sweets, I don’t think you should even be in this job. You’re far too foxy,” he says with a wink, “You’d be better in a different job. I mean, women aren’t fit for these types of roles. They get too emotional.”
You refrain from punching his face as it will only prove his point. “Listen, Ken–”
“It’s Keith–”
“Kyle,” you amend with a sickly smile. “I do need to get these files to Agent Rossi, so if you’ll excuse me…”
“Aw, come on, it was only a joke,” Pembroke says with a laugh. “It’ll be fine–”
“There you are.”
You don’t think you’ve ever felt more relieved in your life. Aaron’s hand rests flat against your back, dangerously close to the waistband of your skirt and he stands behind you. Aaron is a good couple of inches taller than Pembroke, especially when he stands at his full height, his dark eyed narrowed and his jaw clenched. 
“Did you need something from my agent, Captain?” He asks lowly. 
“Just pleasant conversation,” Pembroke responds dismissively.
Aaron raises an eyebrow, his gaze shifting from your uncomfortable frown to the captain’s smug face. “We have three missing women and you are disturbing an investigation by disrupting my agents. I suggest you get your act together before I report you to your superiors for harassment.”
He doesn’t bother waiting for a response, guiding you by the small of your back towards his makeshift office in the New York Police Office. He doesn’t say a word until the door is firmly closed and the blinds are drawn. 
“Are you alright?” He asks softly, taking a step towards you and curling his fingers by your cheekbone. “I heard what he said. Do you want me to report it?”
“I’ve dealt with worse.” You don’t mean to sound so honest when you say it and his frown deepens.
“That’s not okay, honey.” Aaron presses a kiss to your forehead. “I’ll report it. You know how it is with cases like these; someone just has to put the first step forward.”
You smile at that, poking at his cheeks. “I thought you were going to hit him.”
“I thought you would’ve beat me to it,” he admits through a quiet laugh, giving you a proper kiss. “We shouldn’t make this into a habit.”
“Tell that to Kimberly.”
“That isn’t even close.”
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reblogs are always appreciated!
events page
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changisworld · 2 months ago
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Who ever said fours a crowd?
3Racha X reader
word count:6,400
Summary: You & your boyfriend, Changbin, have both just started dating & he brings up the idea of inviting his long time & your long time friend, Chris, into the bedroom to help teach him how to pleasure you just right, since he was still a bit 'new' to sex, but you all forgot Jisung, their roommate, is also home.
18+,MDNI! smut below the cut.
©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.
main masterlist here
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->SMUT WARNINGS: mxmxmxf, mxm, frottage( mxm), mentions of past encounters, PIV, oral (f rec), manhandling(??), praise, protected sex, unprotected sex, cum eating, multiple orgasms, size kink, anal play (m rec), anal(m rec) reader has a WAPPP, shy binnie, fingering(f rec), perv!Jisung, nipple/tit play, spit, Binnie is insecure at the start but reader doubles down & calms him down, mentions of a second round<3
->What better way to thank you all for 1K, 1.1K ANNND 1.2K followers than to do a 3racha smut? But seriously thank you so much, I haven't even been posting on here for 8 whole months & despite so many breaks in between you've all been so patient with me so thank you thank you thank you<3
You have been talking to Changbin for over an hour by this point in his shared apartment's living room, trying to figure out some boundaries, the reason for this being because you were both making out while a random movie was playing & you took it upon yourself to try take it a bit.. further, as your hand moves down to cup over his bulge, before the poor baby squirmed away from you, leaving you confused.
"It's not that I don't want it, I do! I just, I'm scared in case I won't be good at it, I've only slept with two people four times & I like you too much to disappoint you in case you don't like it" he murmurs, sounding embarrassed of what he had just said, avoiding to look at you sitting against the arm of the couch, playing with a loose thread attached to a couch cushion.
"Binnie, we don't need to do anything I'm more than happy to wait, but don't think of yourself like that, you're being silly, is there anything I can do to make you more comfortable? cmere" you respond, pulling him towards you anyways until he shuffles himself forwards on the couch so both of your crossed legs knees are touching.
“It’s not a you problem so no there’s nothing you can do to make me any more comfortable, i’m just too nervous, i feel like i need someone to show me how to do it or something, wanna be good for you” he whimpers as he pulls you into him, his back landing on the sitting part of the couch & you landing on top of him & you cup his puffy cheeks in your hands.
"Binnie I wouldn't judge you for it, I've felt your cock before & I know you'd be just fine, promise! Why n-" you cut yourself off when the front door to your boyfriends apartment opens, his best friend of years & a now close-ish friend of your own, Chan.
"Ah, heya you two, why do you both look like you've seen a ghost, what's up?" he says as he tosses his backpack on the floor beside the messy, cluttered shoe rack & it's only when he says this you process how shocked you must look to have seen him, Changbin looking a bit startled too.
"Hi chan, you just gave us a fri-" "Hyung, we were both just talking about something n I wanna ask you something!" Changbin says, cutting you off, turning his body on the couch to look behind him enough to properly look at who he's talking to, & Chan just nods as he walks over & slumps himself on the couch, next to changbin as he angles himself so he can look at you both at the same time before crossing his legs.
"Okay so, I wanted to know if you'd, help me with something Hyung" he goes on & if you looked like you'd seen a ghost before, it must look like you've been placed in the centre of a haunted house at this point. You open your mouth to speak but Chan beats you to it by telling him to continue.
"Okay, so, Ah I don't know how to ask!" he tries to joke to shake off his nerves, before continuing on. "Me & y/n were talking pretty much, & we both already know that with our schedule it's almost impossible to have time for people & also, sex? & I don't wanna disappoint y/n with my.. lack of experience, so to speak & I don't want my first experience with her to be better than just good, so I want you to help us" he blabs out, his voice sounding 'normal' on surface level, but you & chan know he is exploding with nerves.
Chan looks at him & then at you with surprise, not really knowing how to react, 'if i say yes straight away will I look desperate?' 'what if this is just a prank?' races through his head multiple times & words semi permanently die in his throat.
"The offer is only there if y/n is okay with it too though! If it's a no, we can forget I even asked you, don't feel pressured at all, just an idea." he says to chan before turning to you & he rests his hand on your knee, caressing it, which helps calm yourself down & he offers you his cute, soft smile.
"Binnie, we really don't need to do this, stop getting into your own head, I don't want this to negatively affect you in any way." you finally speak up & Chan nods his head at your reply.
"It won't, I wouldn't offer or suggest it if it would, we really don't need to do it, it's all in your hands" he responds softly & you can't help but feel like he really is being 100% truthful, & of course he is, & you come to the conclusion that if he is ready to do all of this just to pleasure you right, you can't really not help out.
"Okay Bin, I'll do it, Only if you're also okay with it Chan, obviously, but also if you're okay with it Binnie, like.. fully okay" you speak & Binnie leans forward enough to take your hands, caressing those instead. "Of course i'm fine with it! What are your thoughts Hyung? If you don't wanna do it, it's completely fine, we can forget it ever happened" Changbin blabs, the both of you looking at Chan, his eyes already glued on you both.
"Lemme have a bit of a think about it & I'll come back to you a lot about it, it's a big thing to just say yes to" he replies before he stands back up & leans over to purposely mess up your boyfriends curly hair, chuckling to himself before he makes his way to his room, the dim, purple LED lights in your vision as you watch him close the door behind him.
***
It’s been a day since you, Changbin & Chan had that talk & in all honesty, it’s all you could think about. ‘Have you embarrassed yourself by saying yes so quick?’ ‘will changbin think differently of me for saying yes?’ ‘what if chan changes his mind & i look like a freak for agreeing without him agreeing��� are the three main things that race through your mind, no matter how much you try forget about it, it’s just impossible!
The guys are doing something in the studio at the minute, & you decide to try deep clean your boyfriend’s bedroom to take your mind off it.
You strip the bed, of course finding a pair of your underwear.. or two inside his pillowcase, but you don’t bother to even question it, honestly quite flattered that he is so nervous to do anything with you physically but doesn’t think twice about stealing your used panties to jerk off to.
You re-fold his messy clothes that have just been thrown into the drawers, not too many noticeable creases in them to the point you feel the need to iron them, before plopping yourself back on the now fresh sheeted bed, a bit worn out from all the work you’ve just done.
As if it could be called perfect timing.. or worst timing, you hear Chan & Changbin get back to the apartment & you quickly realise they sound completely like normal, giggling about stuff you don’t understand & you take a sigh of relief, thinking that it won’t be as awkward if & when you have to face Chan again.
They part ways as Changbin returns to his bedroom, his eyes widening slightly at the tidied room & he is quick to pretty much leap on top of you, pecking you all over your cheeks before holding his upper half with his arm muscles as he looks down at you, a hand of his on each side of your head, laying on the bed.
"Chan spoke to me by the way, he said he will help us, are you still okay with all of this? I don't wanna make you uncomfortable y/n & you can seriously tell me if you don't wanna do it, or if you have any doubts whatsoever we can just tell him we changed our mind, If i have to force myself to man up, i'll do it." he murmurs, a bit shy in what he says, not usually being so forward with you unless it's just flirting, his chubby cheeks flushed red & his hair still a bit damp above you with sweat from the gym not too long prior.
You are honestly surprised at the fact Chan actually said yes, especially with how long it took for him to come to a conclusion, not that you were rushing him in any way, but you mostly thought that because you hadn't heard anything, it would have been a no.
"It's fine Binnie, I haven't changed my mind, but I still want you to be involved, I don't wanna fuck another man in front of you & you not doing anything." you suggest, but it's not really a 'suggestion' & it will only happen if he is involved, your mind is completely made up about it & Changbin is quick to nod at your words.
"I was planning on that anyway! I don't wanna be a complete cuck y/nnie I still need to be taught!" He pouts before lightly knocking on your shoulder in the same way you notice he loves to hit his members when he's happy or flustered before he nuzzles himself in your neck, not caring that he is pretty much inhaling your hair, the faint smell of the shampoo he also uses coating the strands.
"So uh, when does he.. wanna do it?" you ask, taking the time to rake your fingers through his curly & slightly frizzy hair & Changbin leans into your touch, tensing when your fingers hit his sweet spot.
"He said to just tell him when we want it, why, you want it that bad?" he teases you & you jokingly push him off of you & he can't help but giggle.
"it's not like that Bin! Just wanna see you & also it makes sense to kinda.. do it now-ish? because Jisung is gone so there's more privacy & Jisung is usually glued to Chan's hip if not Minho's!" you murmur, your ears burning red as you avoid his eyes with your own as you then flip onto your stomach & your legs sway slowly back & forth as you reach to play with Changbin's poodle hair.
"That's true, do you want me to get him like... now? I don't know how to go around this, should I let you shower or something first if you want?" Changbin suggests, pulling you into him, hugging you & you move your head to give him a peck on the nose before eskimo kissing him, which makes you both giggle.
"I showered earlier, I don't know what to do either, we can just go with the flow mkay? It's Chan who's joining us, not the other way around so we have the power in our hands, if we don't like it or change our minds i'm positive he won't mind." you respond & Changbin nods beneath you.
"You're right, I'ma go get him, mkay? It only goes as far as you want it to, so don't be scared to tell Chan no!" he says as he wriggles from you & blowing a kiss to you which you pretend to catch before he leaves the room & you can't help but chew the inside of your cheek with anxiety.
A couple of minutes later, Chan is trailing in behind your boyfriend & he is wearing a lot comfier of an outfit than what you usually see him wearing to the gym, going for some plain grey sweatpants & a tank top & his wide shoulders & his big biceps that are so deliciously toned & the veins running up his arms, which you don't fail to miss.
Chan shuts the bedroom door behind him & Chan takes it upon himself to sit beside you on the bed, before signalling Changbin to sit on the opposite side, you now being sandwiched between them both.
"Okay so uh.. are you completely okay with all of this y/n? Don't be scared of hurting my feelings because trust me you won't, we just want everything to be completely clear." Chan speaks out, his australian accent decorating his voice which you can't help but take a lot more interest in now given what is going to take place.
"I'm sure, don't stress it, Binnie wants help & he trusts you to do that & besides, you're an attractive guy so why would I turn it down" you chuckle & Chan returns it, not being able to stop himself from blushing.
"So uh, Bin, what is it that you want me to 'teach' you?" he looks past you & over to your boyfriend, who is playing with a loyalty ring he bought you when he first asked you to be his girlfriend with his fingers.
"Uh, kinda.. everything? But I still need to be involved, y/n wants that." he says, a chirp in his voice as his hand tightens around yours & you smile at Chan, confirming his words & Chan nods.
"Okay, so what are your guys.. limits? Yes, no's & maybe's?" Chan questions, his voice trying to sound nonchalant but it's not hard to pick up on the fact he is probably even more nervous than you or Changbin are.
"Uhh, I can't really think of anything, oh wait, no cumming inside or wear a condom" you speak & Chan nods again, his eyes widening slightly, not expecting to have been having the opportunity to fuck you tonight.
"Okay, Changbin, I have condoms in my left side second drawer, can you go get me a condom?" he asks as he moves his hand to rest on your thigh & Changbin hums a yes response before leaving & Chan takes it upon himself to lean in & kiss you the second you look at him & both of your lips fall into place pretty much instantly.
You're quick to notice how soft his lips are around yours as he takes control of it, you get so lost in it you barely register the fact that your boyfriend had already made his way back into the room.
"You guys look hot together, I don't know if i should be extremely turned on or jealous" Changbin remarks, his dimples poking in his cheeks as he sits behind you this time before pulling you up the bed so you're sitting between his spread legs with your back against his chest & Chan is quick to follow, setting himself facing you between your own legs.
"Maybe you just have a kink for it, can see the edge of your cock under the side of your sweatpants" Chan replies, chuckling. "I can feel it too" you respond & Changbin tuts at your teasing, hiding his face in your neck as he starts kissing the soft skin, the faint smell of body wash still scenting it.
"So I'm right in saying you've obviously kissed before so I don't need to teach you both that, why not you try touching her, Bin? Watch." Chan says in a soft voice as he grabs one of Changbins hands that are resting on your waist & brings it up to your left tit over your clothes & Chan takes a hold of your right one & they both feel & then find your nipples from above your shirt & they both quickly notice you've not put a bra on & Chan subconsciously bites hit bottom lip, buzzing at the thought.
"Try twisting it like this, not too much but have a firm grip on it, rub your thumb over the bud, you can lick your fingers too, makes it nice n wet, can I lift your shirt y/n?" Chan asks, his other hand running along the hem of your... Changbin's shirt that you've stolen for yourself & you nod at his request.
"Bin, can you take it off for us?" he chirps, looking at the man behind you, who is looking not back at him, but instead down at Chan's fingers, following not only hi words but mirroring his actions, almost in a daze before he snaps out of it at the sudden question & nods his head rapidly & you raise your arms up to help your boyfriend strip you.
Your nipples stiffen up at the feel of the air around you all but you don't ponder on it as their fingers resume their place on your tits, & you melt into the touch as you lean further into Changbin, soaking yourself in the feeling, finding comfort in the rapid heart beats coming from his chest.
"Gonna go further now, alright?" chan speaks up & you nod your head, your eyes not bothering to open your eyes & you can feel your boyfriend nodding behind you, his fingers not stopping their actions on your hard bud.
Chan licks his fingers before bringing it back to your nipple before bringing his other hand to your skin, slowly dragging it down your naked stomach & waist, before bringing his hand to the waistband of your baggy shorts & Changbin takes the time to pat you on the cheek & when you open your eyes, Chan is looking up at you, nonverbally asking you if he can continue/
"Go on, please" you murmur as you spread your legs that tiny bit extra & Chan smirks up at you both before he makes quick work of removing your shorts completely, now leaving you completely nude now since you also so happen to have chose to not wear underwear & your legs quiver at the cold hair hitting your core, already dripping at this point, & Chan is quick to tell you how wet you are.
"Bin, come sit around here" Chan speaks & Changbin lets out a small whimper as he forces himself to detach himself from your nipple, which in his humble opinion, is probably the prettiest thing he has ever seen that isn't your face, but his opinion is quick to change when he crawls to sit himself down next to his friend as you help give them more room by shuffling upwards just enough so you can lay your head on the pillows.
You try to shut your legs, feeling awkward & shy at the two men staring at your naked cunt, clenching around nothing but Chan is quick to stop you from shutting them, holding them open.
"Keep em open pretty, look how wet you are, you're lucky Bin, gonna show you how to touch her & eat her, okay?" Chan speaks to Bin & when your eyes land on your boyfriend, you can tell how nervous he is & when he rests his hand on your knee, you stretch your arm to hold onto his.
"Speak Bin, just relax, it's just us, you need to focus if you wanna learn" he doubles down, tapping his friends arm, snapping him out of whatever trance he's in.
"Can't help but daydream, you're to pretty." not talking directly to Chan, but you instead & you hide your face in your arm.
"I know, like I just said you're real lucky, watch my hand mkay? You wanna tease a bit first, makes it more interesting." chan chirps as his fingers finish trailing down your skin, now landing on your outer lips of your cunt before he starts slowly spreading your wetness, not as if you'd even need it anyways since you're beyond gushing anyway & the sensation of his slightly calloused fingers dragging across your pussy but you physically twitch when his fingers finally directly land on your clit.
"Here's where the clit is, it's the easiest way to make a girl cum so make sure you actually remember where it is & find out, it's uncomfortable for the girl if you rub next to it, but don't do it too rough or hard because it's really sensitive, like this." Chan further continues as he starts visibly demonstrating as he speaks, his index & middle finger rubbing slow circles on your clit, making you whimper & both of their eyes shoot up to you at the sound, both of their cocks getting even harder if it was possible.
"You can tell if they actually feel good by their reactions, you can see her pussy clenching around nothing, do you know how to finger a girl Bin?" he asks, not bothering to let his eyes become unglued from your pussy, his fingers already drenched in your wetness.
"I've watched tutorials on pornhub & I've done it with the very few fucks i've had, i know how to" he stutters as he feels the need to bring his own fingers to your pussy, it looking far too inviting for him to keep his paws off & you instantly feel as if your skin is on fire.
Chan takes the opportunity to remove his fingers from your clit & you let out a whimper at the loss of contact as your hips try chase his fingers but it's short lived as your boyfriend's fingers take their place & start working at their own pace, different but not bad.
His fingers are a bit more clumsy than Chans despite him concentrating that tiny bit extra but your butterflies are intensified a billion times more by knowing it's him touching you & you can't stop yourself from looking down to look at the pretty boy in front of you playing with you like this & without him looking away from you, he leans down just enough so he can perfectly let a glob of spit land on your clit & you jolt.
"Binnie, want your tongue." you mumble, trying to keep your composure, nibbling on your bottom lip. "Wanna taste you" he replies, sounding more dazed than you are before he is moving his hand away from you & you quickly sit up & start tugging at his shirt & he quickly takes the hint & takes it off & you flop yourself backwards again as Changbin lays down between your legs, his face just centimetres away from your pussy, your wetness already causing a wet patch on the bedsheets.
Chan takes it upon himself to crawl up your frame & sits on the back of his knees before pinching a nipple with his right hand as he brings his left hand down to your cunt, pulling the skin upwards, exposing your already swollen clit just that tiny bit extra to help his friend.
Changbin takes a moment or two to just simply admire how gorgeous your pussy really is, & he has to mentally slap himself because of how long he's put off sex because of his own nerves, not knowing that literal perfection was so close to him.
Before he can doubt himself, he lets his lips suction onto your pudgy clit as he starts swirling his tongue around it & you instantly doubt the claim that he's bad at sex because he is acting like a natural.
"Fuck Bin, tongue is good" you whimper, your voice shaky as he slurps up your juices along with the pool of spit that's uncontrollably rolling off his tongue & your fingers weave into his curly hair.
"He making you feel good, babe?" Chan questions as he brushes the now damp hair from your face & he looks down at you with a cheeky smile, but you're too out of it to snap back at him, instead, you look down at his sweatpants that he's still wearing & you can easily see the huge boner he's sporting & you can't stop yourself from reaching to start pawing at them, & thankfully he takes the hint.
Chan takes his sweatpants off, leaving him in just his boxers. "Off cha, th-those too" you fight the words through your moans & but he does as you say & takes off his tank top too while he's at it, now totally naked too but instead of joining you both back on the bed, Chan is walking over to the bedroom door & opening it, & much to your shock, but not to chan or changbins, Jisung is standing right outside the door with his leaky cock in his hand, now frozen in place.
"I thought I heard you whining outside, we're busy & I thought you were with Leeknow?" Chan speaks, a complete monotone voice, almost as if he's not standing completely naked with his heavy, veiny cock in his hand.
"W-wanted to j-just listen, can I join? s-sounds pretty." he murmurs, his big boba eyes darting from you, to chan & then to changbin, just to repeat the motion over again & Changbin has detached his pretty lip from your clit, breaking the suction seal on your pussy before rubbing your clit with his fingers again, the feeling more intense with how sensitive his tongue has made it as you start grinding against him, unable to even think of a response to give Jisung.
"It's not my choice, it's y/nnies, but I don't think she's able to talk, I'm teaching Bin well, aren't I?" Chan asks, hinting a response for Bin & he let's himself enter not one but two fingers into your cunt before quickly setting a decent pace, his other hand's thumb flicking your clit at the same pace as best as he can.
"So well hyung, ask y/n it's her who to ask" Changbin chirps, his voice flushed out as he slows down the grinding on the mattress as he looks at the doorway & Jisung fixates his eyes on you, teary.
"Just c-come in -fuck bin, come in Jisung" you cry out & Jisung pretty much gallops into the room, past his naked friend & he pretty much hops onto the bed as he shakes his clothes off & chan makes quick work of following him, not bothering to shut the door behind him.
Changbin doesn't bother to ponder on the fact that Jisung is now here, instead completely focused on the way you're clenching around his chubby fingers, feeling your orgasm bubble up, it feeling different to when you're just masterbating on your own.
"Bin, think i-ima cum, so goodd" you squeak as you grip onto Jisungs arm beside you without thinking & Changbin's ego gets boosted by the words you spit out & he takes the chance to suckle back on your clit again, making sure to pull on the pudge of it to get better access, just like what Chan did & your legs convulse around his head as you try to force yourself to keep them open, but Jisung takes it upon himself to straddle you with his back facing you, holding your legs open, also giving himself a perfect view of his friends tongue & lips engulfing your pussy.
"Cum for us babe, if it feels good just let go" Chan remarks & you look up at him with glossy eyes, dazed & fucked out as you let out a squeal as you bubble over, your orgasm flushing throughout your entire body as your toes curl around him & your fingers clench so hard around his fingers he's force to pull them out, a white cream ring around the base of his fingers.
Jisung reaches down to grab at Changbin's wrist before pulling the fingers that just fucked you up to his mouth before licking your own orgasm off of them, groaning at the taste, his drool coating his fingers & he takes it upon himself to tease you all by gagging on his fingers but to not really anyones surprise, Changbin just looks up at him in awe, his fingers finally slowing down on your clit, letting you come down from your orgasm, which he learned to do from porn.
"Did so well for us y/nnie, do you wanna keep going? We can stop here if you're too worn out we can do this another day if it's too much, no stress." Chan speaks out as he pulls Jisung off of you & onto the place on the bed he just was, Jisung laying next to you now & he turns his head to give you a smile, which you mirror.
"Wanna keep going, want you Bin." you make grabby hands & Bin crawls up your frame to kiss you & that's when you feel that he still has his sweatpants on & he doesn't even need to be asked before he's taking them off along with his boxers, his thick cock hitting against his toned tummy, making you drool.
"Want to feel you so bad Bin, please binnie." you murmur as he holds himself above you before he leans down to kiss you, but you're both interrupted by the sounds of Jisung & Chan moaning beside you & when you turn to look, Chan has his own & Jisungs cock wrapped in his palms as they grind against each other, using their own precum as lube & with how wet their cocks are, they could give you a run for your money & you'd be lying if you said you aren't even more turned on now, Jisungs legs wrapped around Chans ripped frame as Chans thick cock almost hides Jisungs with the size difference as their sensitive tips bash & glide against one anothers.
You can feel Changbin freeze up a bit when you reach down to grip his cock with your hand when you try align it with your cunt & you reach to caress his cheek. "It's alright Binnie, you've already made me cum you're good!" you pretty much cheer, your voice soft & Chan can't help but overhear it & he has a bright idea.
"I'll guide you Bin, Jisung you're gonna help us, mkay?" Chan asks & Jisung already knows where it's going & he nods with stars in his eyes as he flips around so he's on his knees before dropping from his hands so he's arched, his already stretched hole on display for Chan & Changbin to see & you can't help but feel a bit left out that you can't see it from where you're laying down.
Changbin & you look over at the sight, honestly extremely surprised at how... comfortable they are to do this with one another.
"Are we missing something? Do you guys hook up & none of us knew this?" you giggle & Jisung lets out a pouty whine, turning his face away from you to avoid your gazes.
"There's nothing wrong with having fun on our own, like Changbin's said, being idols give us a horribly busy schedule!" he whips back at you as he makes quick work of grabbing the condom that Changbin collected earlier from the floor & he rips open the packet before rolling the condom onto his cock.
"it's easy Bin, promise. Everyone obviously has a G-spot & you need to try find it, it's more spongey but if you've felt it with your fingers, your cock will definitely reach it so don't stress, go in slow & then pick up the pace, & don't just have messy thrusts you gotta keep a rhythm" Chan instructs as he takes his own cock in his hand & aligns it up with Jisungs already lubed hole, from when he was actually prepping himself just before he started jerking off outside the door.
Changbin stumbles with his hands for a minute before he copies his hyung in the room, not only his heart but also your heart racing as he decides to beat Chan to the chase & he pushes himself inside you, the width of his cock a huge stretch to just his fingers, & Changbin stalls inside you half way, partly to let you adjust but also to stop himself from cumming on the spot with how tight & warm you are, the way you're clenching around him is suffocating in the best way possible.
Jisung looks at the reaction on your face & he can't wait any longer as he then starts shaking his ass on his dick, trying to persuade his hyung to just give him what he wants & Chan can't hold himself back any longer & slides himself in quite quickly, knowing Jisung loves the painful but pleasurable stretch from the roughness & he lets out a choked noise that makes you gush.
"Y-you're so tight jagi, oh my- oh my god" Changbin squeaks, his eyes struggling to not roll to the back of his head & you look up at him with love hearts in your eyes, your brain malfunctioning as you reach to hold onto his biceps that you love so much, the choked gurgles of Jisungs whines & squeals filling the room.
Changbin forces himself to piece his mind together again just enough to start fucking into you at a good pace & you're just so full you swear you can feel him coming out of your throat almost. "S-so big Bi-binnie, doing so good" you cry out & by this point you've genuinely forgot that your boyfriends two closest friends are literally fucking beside you & you won't be surprised if you dismiss the huge puddle of spit on the bedsheets as your own later.
Chan reaches down to start jerking off Jisung at the same pace as his cock is thrusting into him & literally just after a couple of pumps of his cock, he is cumming all over Changbin's bedsheets with a wail as he spasms & shakes beneath Chan, but he doesn't let up.
Chan takes a second to look at you & Changbin & deems his work as done in terms of getting him comfortable to fuck you, & he can tell you both need no more help & he scoops up Jisung & carries him by the inside of his knees, his back touching his chest as he takes them both out of the room to make way to whatever next surface he can fuck Jisung against, leaving just you & Binnie together, not that you could be paid to care at this point.
"Y-you're so pre-beautiful, so good" he babbles above you as he flops forward enough to kiss you, tongues wrapping around one another as he hits that gummy spot his fingers were rubbing against earlier & your whines jump up an octowave.
"Shit bin, wa-gonna cum, pl-please" you cry as you break the kiss to try catch a breath or two but you hold your breath in shock & happiness at Changbin's response.
"Cum, p-please, I- i love you jagi, ss-so much, so good" he gibbers as he brings his hand down to your clit again, rubbing more messy circles on your clit & your toes start curling but you force yourself to hold back your orgasm for the time being, as tense as a rock beneath him as squelching noises fill the room, his cock almost completely slipping out every time he retracts himself, your hand reaching own each time he does so just to make sure you can quickly slide him back into his probably new favourite place if it happened.
"I- love you too bin, prett-prettiest boy" you whimper & at those words matched with you then pulling his head from your neck once he nested it there & kiss him again with your hands cupping his chubby cheeks & he lets out a small squeal as he is cumming before he can warn you & at the feeling of him filling you up & the way he pulsates in you, your own orgasm hits you too & he accidentally bites down on it & you moan that extra bit louder at the feeling.
You both come down from your orgasm, panting & huffing on top of one another, only the sounds of Jisung being fucked by Chan just down the hallway, but your mind is too all over the place.
"I me-meant what I said by the way, sorry it took my friend to help me fuck you." he murmurs, his voice sounding raspy but chirpy.
"I meant it too, I looooveee you! & don't stress it, it was hot anyways." you emphasis it further by pecking him all over his face, his cute dimples plastered on his cheeks as he gets shy.
"I can still hear Chan & Jisung fucking, if you want we can go join them, since you think it's hot" he half teases, but you can tell he isn't really joking. "you'll need to climb off me if you want to go, hurry before Jisung is fully spent!" you snap back & you can feel his cock that was just starting to go limp inside you chub back up before he's pulling out as he picks you up & pretty much sprints to what turns out to be the living room & Jisung on his knees sucking Chan off & you're quick to land on your knees beside Jisung, poking your head in to get a taste as Changbin sits beside chan a Jisung switches places with you.
->I really don't think I like this im afraid</3 but I could potentially do a part two but it won't be until after kinktober & after i finish my part two to my felix smut so please be patient mwah x
->Taglist & anon list is open! @jisungml
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winterrrnight · 7 months ago
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rafe loves to hear you talk and talk about things you are so passionate about… <3 a rafe x reader blurb <3 cw: reader is chatty and rambl-y and is insecure about it, in this scenario reader is extremely passionate about japanese legends, lovesick rafe + casually dominant rafe, intentional lower case <3 just something for me to post after a small break as I work on other projects <3 for @zyafics who is one of the biggest reasons I am feeling motivated to write again <3
“oh here’s another one I read about yesterday!” you say excitedly as rafe squeezes your intertwined hands, smiling at you.
“mhm go on,” he smiles as you both continue to walk on the sidewalk, the full moon shining bright down at the two of you.
“this one is about the red thread of fate, this thread connects two soulmates,” you smile at him. he looks at you with his eyebrows slightly raised.
“connects two soulmates?” he echoes, and you nod.
“yeah,” you say. “it’s said there is a man who lives on the moon who comes to earth to show people their futures and who they’ll end up with. he does that with the help of the red thread of fate. he ties this invisible red thread between the two people who are meant to be together. this thread can tangle over the huge distance between the two people, it can stretch, but it will never ever break, and it will always tighten to bring those two people together.
“it also talks about the existence of a red pencil which can trace this invisible red thread, and this pencil gets shorter with its usage.
“oh and, this thread is always tied between the pinkies of the two people. that is because it was discovered a long time ago that our heart is connected to our pinky finger by an artery, which is now called the ‘ulnar artery’. this artery carries oxygenated blood from our heart to our pinky. so, in a way, our heart is directly linked to our pinkies via this artery, so when we make a pinky promise, we are basically connecting our hearts while making the promise. and that is why the invisible red thread of fate is also connecting our pinkies, because it is basically connecting the hearts of the soulmates, and–”
you take a look to your left at rafe, who’s looking down at the sidewalk as you both walk. you got so absorbed in talking you don’t even know if he is still listening or if he has tuned you out. honestly, who can blame him? since you keep on talking too much, anyone would quickly tune you out.
“oh god i’m doing it again aren’t i?” you say nervously as you stop in your tracks on the sidewalk, causing rafe to stop too. he eyes you with furrowed brows and creases on his forehead.
the actual truth is, rafe was thinking about tying a red thread to your pinkies when you both get home, his mind racing on where he can actually find some red thread in his house.
“doing what?” rafe asks softly.
“the, the ramble thing, where i just talk and talk till my mouth falls off,” you sigh, looking down. “I do that way too much, i don’t even know if you want to hear it or not but I just start speaking with no seeming end to my talk whatsoever, and you have to force yourself to listen to it because you got stuck being my boyfriend. and then i just keep on talking without thinking, it’s like my mouth has a mind of its own, I really should start to think–”
you are immediately cut off with rafe’s lips on yours, your eyes widening as you try to adjust to what is happening. rafe’s free hand comes to rest on your cheek to pull you even closer into the kiss, and your eyes flutter shut, letting you get lost in the feeling of him.
rafe gently pulls apart from the kiss, his eyes barely open as he gazes down at you.
“listen to me…” he says softly. “you don’t talk too much. I love hearing you talk. I love the cute expressions you make when you talk about things you are passionate about. I love how much knowledge you have about them and how you want to share it with me. I love the shine in your eyes when you start to talk, and the shine is even brighter under the moonlight. never ever apologize for talking too much because I won’t hear it, and you’ll only end up getting kissed by me each time. you get it?”
you look up in rafe’s eyes with a stunned expression. for the first ever time, you are at a loss of words, and all you can do is nod.
he smiles softly at you, as his thumb caresses your cheek. “words, baby, you hear me?” he says softly.
“yeah…” you let out. “I hear you,”
“good,” he mumbles. “never apologize again, okay?”
“okay,” you whisper.
he presses a soft kiss to your forehead and tugs on your hand gently, both of you now walking again. “come on, continue what you were saying,” he says, urging you to continue about the legend you were talking about.
you nod as you clear your throat before resuming to tell him more, this time not allowing even a single thought to let you stop as the stream of words spills from your lips, and rafe only listens in awe, loving hearing what it is you have to tell him.
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ilycosy · 7 months ago
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being tara's friend and starring on the podcast!! getting borderline wasted with her and zach during the show and drunkenly admitting you'd have a threesome with the two of them <3
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ive been putting this off bc of motivation but x. x we finally got our zachyummy x reader fic !!!! who cheered :3 ??
fyi it's a little implied that tara n reader have alr slept together <3 js for the simplicity , also it's a little choppy at the end but it's js bc idk how 2 end it <//3
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you felt a little warm as you sipped on your beer, watching tara banter with zach. you and tara have been friends for years, meeting each other because of jake, but you had only met zach a couple of months ago. you got along well with him, you just weren't as bubbly as tara was.
tara giggled and leaned her head onto your shoulder, listening to jared ask a question. "out of all your friends," he says with a giggle, his face a little red from the beer. "who would you be most likely to sleep with?"
you glanced at tara, watching as she wrinkled her nose and said nobody while zach tried to pry for more. in a split moment of drunken confidence you blurted out, "well, zach, but i think id want tara's emotional support there too." you barely finish the sentence as you feel embarrassment rush through you, zach already whistling and giggling into the mic.
it was the first time tara had glanced at you back that night, smiling to herself as she finished off her bottle.
by the time the podcast ended, tara was offering everyone over to her place knowing that jared had plans. seeing that you and zach were free, you both agreed to come over. huddling on either side of tara in the uber that she ordered, she talked idly so the ride wasn't awkward.
you probably should've noticed that tara was getting touchier and going past the friendly flirting, but you were too tipsy to process. only noticing the tension when tara had backed you into zach, your eyes meeting his equally shocked and flushed face.
you would've felt more shame for how fast you allowed tara to do this if it didn't feel so good, her lipstick smearing against your jaw and face while she left comforting kisses. her hand threaded in zach's hair as she kept him in place, his big hands keeping you spread as he took turns from teasingly licking you and completely working his tongue into you.
"jesus christ woman," he huffs, pulling you closer by your thighs. causing you to slide down so your head is resting in between tara's legs. "i can eat them out myself, get your claws off of'm." he makes no effort to pull away from her hand, which makes her pet his hair.
you sniffle, whining as he continues eating you out. pressing rough kisses against your clit before sucking it, you can tell he's grinding onto the couch from the shifting. "fuck, zach you need to get more fingers in," tara mutters, moving her hand away from his head so both her hands could cup your tits.
he barely lifts his head to see what he's doing before he's listening and slipping in a finger inside, looking up to watch your face screw up and admiring tara's tanned skin against yours.
"good enough for you, ms. yummy?" he asks teasingly, pressing kisses along your thighs and up your stomach as he works in a second finger. "shut up, zach." is all she says before giggling and pulling him into a kiss, both of them whimpering into the kiss as you're trying to keep your eyes open to watch.
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kozumesphone · 30 days ago
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01 ✦ ‘cops and robbers’ chase each other full of energy ! ༄.°
𝒽wang hyunjin x f!reader
masterlist . . . ✰
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𓆩♡𓆪 𝒶n : i’m going crazyyyyy. I needed to put down—into words—an irl situation, and decided to call it a fanfic for my bias and post it 😭 anywayy it’s my first non-pjo or non-anime fic so I hope it turned out okay 😩 also here’s some fanart I found of the same vlive as the icons above (it’s so cute) ! <3 and as always!! anything I write about the idols is not a representation of them irl ! also possibly part ii coming as soon as I have the patience to write it bc I love the current flow 😋
𓆩♡𓆪 𝓌arnings + tags : day 1 , best friend!hyunjin , non-idol au , high school au , f!reader , best friends who do more-than-best-friends things , hinted bio students attending prep school together: hyune and reader , skz ot8 are in a highschool band together w reader , fluff , hyunjin’s a cutie patootie , smart!hyune x smart!reader , cutesy hand holding , hinting at stress (reader) , reader has glasses (which is unrelated to everything but still) , banter , teasing , ot8 appear a lot , nicknames (n/n, jagiya) , mother chan , jeongin is a menace , swearing a few times ;
𓆩♡𓆪 𝓌c : 831
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DAY #01 . . .
“you’re staring,” hyunjin said, continuing to flex his arm’s muscles.
“nope. i’m revising anatomy before class starts. I was looking at the humerus, articulated through the glenoid cavity to the scapula,” I said, smiling.
“oh, sure.” he rolled his eyes. “since you’re staring so hard, wanna kiss ‘em?”
I made a face at him, and stuck my tongue out. “you wish!”
he laughed.
“I have them too, okay?” I said, trying to one-up him, as always.
“what?”
“muscles—”
“want me to kiss them?”
I shoved his shoulder away. “we’re late, walk faster!”
“you’re the one with tiny legs, i’m being considerate— OW! don’t stamp on my shoes!”
“shut up!”
“I won’t!”
we made faces at each other and parted ways in front of my classroom since his was the one next to mine.
I spent the next five hours surviving lectures on enzyme activity, literary analysis of dostoyevsky’s works, thermodynamics, and more boring stuff, alongside minho, felix, and jeongin (who fell asleep around five minutes into the first class).
during the break, our group—chris, minho, felix, jeongin, seungmin, han, changbin, hyunjin and I—met up outside our classrooms.
“here’s your blueberry milk, n/n and felix, my favourite children,” chris said, handing us two cans he bought from the vending machine. we smirked at the others, popped the tin open and started downing our drinks in unison. “and here’s your strawberry milk, min. jeongin, your banana milk.”
the others were in the same class as chris, so they got their drinks on their way out. after collecting our drinks from our rightful mother, we headed up to the roof.
“are there any new songs you guys are working on?” hyunjin asked chris, han and changbin—the songwriters of our band—while falling into step beside me.
our hands brushed once, so he held it anyway, and we continued walking together hand-in-hand.
han was talking about a new song they were composing for the band to play at the next music festival, which required a duet.
“we can do it,” I said, raising my free hand, meaning hyunjin and I. everyone else nodded in approval, and continued talking about their classes.
changbin pushed open the door to the roof, and we quickly followed him in pairs, shutting the door behind us.
we took our spots on the fluffy blanket minho got and laid down, hyunjin’s head resting on my lap. minho sat down with his legs on han’s, while jeongin did the same with chris, and seungmin copied them to lay his legs on changbin’s lap.
we continued chatting about the upcoming music festival and tried to figure out a name for our band before then, while my fingers threaded through hyunjin’s soft hair.
after the bell rang, signalling the end of lunch break (during which none of us actually ate our lunches), we returned to our classes for one last hour, after which, we met up outside the school’s main gate to walk home together.
I ran towards hyunjin while his back was facing me, and placed my cold palm against the back of his neck. he jumped suddenly, and shrieked. he threw his jacket onto my face.
“bitch!” I yelled, grabbing the jacket.
“put it on, jagiya, because your hands are cold as fuck! or you’ll die of the cold and then i’ll have to explain to your mother why i’m carrying her only child’s dead body home.”
“joke’s on you, I don’t think she’d mind. ha! and anyway, i’m a normal temperatured human being, for your information, you’re the warm one!” I complained, slipping his jacket on.
“okay, n/n, we all know you’re wrong on that one,” jeongin said. “give up the fight before it gets too embarrassing—”
“you’re all so mean to me, the best member of our group, and for what?” I rolled my eyes, sighing.
felix and chris stepped in front of me dramatically, and said together, “we’ll protect you from these ghouls, y/n!”
everyone burst out laughing, including them and me.
along the walk home, minho, han, changbin, and seungmin went a different way from the rest of us.
we waved our goodbyes, reminding each other to think of a name for our band.
“when’s our next test, hyune?” I asked suddenly.
“at prep school? I think it’s this friday,” he said.
“ugh, you both are such smartypants, you’re always studying or talking about it,” jeongin complained, accurately playing his role as the youngest child and menace of the group.
“and yet it’s not enough,” I muttered to myself, not realising hyunjin heard my words.
my mind divided its attention between worrying about the syllabus I was yet to cover for the test, and listening to the boys’ conversation.
I was snapped out of my thoughts when jeongin, chris and felix parted ways with us.
hyunjin and I walked a bit further to my house, where he dropped me off.
“see you at prep school!” he said, and jogged a block further to reach his house.
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adambja · 1 year ago
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✨Law of Assumption | Reality Creation✨
The ULTIMATE Post on Tumblr - CREDITS GOES TO @X3N97 ON TWITTER
I offer tapes and coaching btw ;) the self-concept tape is guaranteed 100% 🫶🏻
The only post you would ever need.
𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳
DISCLAIMER:
I am a Neville Goddard follower, it took me 2 YEARS to understand the law fully well. Through trial and tribulations it FINALLY clicked for me. I do NOT just follow any YT coach, only who understand the law, so my knowledge might contradict what you know but I hope you get something out of this thread, I want you to use your common sense, have an open mind, you never know, it might be of benefit for you.
Had to lay that out there, let's continue with the post.....
PART 1
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝘼𝙬𝙖𝙠𝙚𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜
Wake up! It is time for you to realize you were the operant power all along, life never "happened" to you! It is happening through you! You can realize this by seeing how life is going around for you, any area in your life if you do a little reverse engineering you would realize you created ALL your circumstances, good or bad! There were never coincidences, you created it. With this realization comes more questioning, how does it actually work? It is through your mind, your consciousness, your awareness I want you to realize that EVERYTHING you see in your reality is perceived by your mind, ALL IS MIND, studies show that if consciousness doesn't exist, reality that you know now does NOT exist
Source 👇🏻
youtube
When we say "the 3D is an illusion" it really is. You're the one assigning meaning/creating whatever the circumstances, the problem is that you were on auto-pilot, the human's non-understanding of reality made you that way, but that will be over now as you realize you hold the power.
Science calls it "the simulation theory" You're the one simulating it with your mind, your awareness, your consciousness, as consciousness is the only thing that we can call as real, spiritually speaking, you're a soul living through body, you are NOT your body.
There are people who went to experience the 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘬, where you get into a tank and restrict environmental sensory, people report that they don't feel their bodies at all and that they are only "aware" goes to show how consciousness is ONLY real (video from the movie: 𝘈 𝘎𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘪𝘯 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘹, I highly recommend)
youtube
I CANNOT stress it enough when I say that you're 𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘭𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘴 as Neville says it, to think this reality is real and that you can't change it and can't be malleable, you do that EVERY single day but UNCONCIOULSY until you awaken to this truth
The truth that you've always been a conscious creator you were just deluded by society from birth that you can't be "supernatural" and alter reality...that this 3D world is real... but this is over! It's time for you to WAKE UP!
PART 2
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙚𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙞𝙘𝙨
How do we consciously create, you ask..
Let's read what science talks about reality creation..
In Quantum Mechanics there's a theory called "the observer effect" which states: the phenomenon in which the act of observation alters the behavior of the particles being observed" Which means whatever we focus on, be aware of; is changeable, more on that in this video:
youtube
If we explain this in more layman words, we will come to an understanding that reality CAN be shifted, with OUR MINDS through focus! There's also the theory in Quantum Physics where there are multiple version of you out there in the Quantum Field and the minute you observe that you become it!
Here's where the fun begins!
PART 3
𝙍𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙮 𝘾𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝘼𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣
Neville Goddard says "creation is finished" What does he mean by that? It means ALL things exists in the NOW, there was never past or present, there is always NOW It all exists. "All possibilities, all the things you desire, your healing, your job, your house, the wisdom you desire, the spiritual attainment you seek, the answers you seek, the partner, whatever it is, because we all desire different things, it's all finished and available."
So when you desire something, you're not trying to get it! It already exists, "Nothing needs to be summoned (manifested), but EVERYTHING already exists!" - Neville, all possibilities exist in the quantum field, all possibilities exist in the 4D. All you have to do is just SELECT that reality, with your MIND, your imagination.
• What's the difference between the 4D and the 3D?
One is where your mind generates images and thoughts so they can be reflected, it is your Godly power of accessing past, present, and future, the real reality, the 3D is just a reflection. 4D is where you CREATE
• How does the 4D pertain to the parallel realities where everything exists?
You access the 4D to choose what you want to experience in the 3D! If you desire it, know that the possibility of it EXITS! Your imagination is the TRUE reality, as Neville says: “When man finally identifies himself with his imagination rather than his senses, he has at long last discovered the core of reality” Remember when I said your senses (operating on the 3D realm) make you think your reality is fixed? It is not, it is always changeable.
Sooo....
• How do we choose/select/shift to the desired reality?
It was never about techniques and I will explain how you can CORRECTLY do this.
So we already know that imagination is the true reality (the 4D) and the 3D (physical reality) is just a reflection, a mirror, a shadow! And we already know there’s infinite versions of you out there and one of them that ALREADY has your desire
But...
• How do we access it?
By shifting your focus, your conciousness, your thoughts! Neville calls it “states of consciousness”
When you change how you’re aware of your desire, how you “assume” it, that is what it’s gonna reflect! Remember the observer effect? What we are conscious of it will manifest
What do I mean by “Techniques don’t manifest, you do!” Most of you go through the mistake of putting importance on them thinking that “if I don’t do it right, I won’t get what i want” here’s why they don’t matter! We already know creation is finished so every possibility exists!
And we already know we create everything effortlessly with our minds! And we also know there’s infinite version of us in the quantum field right?
• Let’s take an SP example (since it’s the most popular topic on loatwt)
Let’s say I am in a version of reality where I don’t have my SP, knowing about parallel realities, I know there’s a version out there of me where I have them! So how do I shift to that version? I just simply ask myself a simple question (this where imagination comes in play the real reality) I ask myself “How would I feel if I was ALREADY in a relationship with them?) I would feel all the feelings of having them ALREADY, I shift to that state, I embody it! I shift my awareness to KNOWING I already have them! Its not about “attracting” things to you, it’s about SELECTING the state, the awareness of my desire! How would I think if I had it already? I jump to that timeline (that I know it EXISTS) and experience what I want so it will be reflected in the 3D, because I experienced in my imagination (4D) so I KNOW It’s REAL, IT HAPPENED! The minute you don’t GIVE AN EFF ABOUT THE 3D IT’S WHEN YOU KNOW YOU CAN CONSCIOUSLY CREATE!!!! Remember 3D is a MIRROR of what you selected in YOUR MIND! When you feel it is ALREADY done! 0 to 100 REAL QUICK!
“So like what about techniques, I don’t affirm anymore?”
Most of you use techniques to produce results. You are still operating on the 3D realm, thinking affirming or whatever will make your desires come true, when in fact you have TO ASSUME the STATE FIRST!
Think about it..if you ALREADY have it would you still be affirming non-stop? How did you manifest when you didn’t know about the law before?
After you assumed the state (conjuring the feelings of ALREADY having what you desire and playing with your imagination) that’s when techniques come in handy! You start affirming NATURALLY and EFFORTLESSLY! You don’t strain yourself by doing it! You are living in the END!
Always LIVE IN THE END! It is done.
Just how this post is. 💋
i reposted it here because I know it will help a lot of people!!!!
• Credits goes to @x3n97 on twitter
The link to @x3n97 post on X (previously Twitter)
Have a good day/night 🥹🫶🏻
I have coaching for the void state and self-concept also tapes and it's guaranteed from my side but it depends on you
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mountainficss · 8 months ago
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soft and gentle babymaking with minghao, for your consideration juseyo ;( yes a breeding kink
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!! mentions of: unprotected sex, breeding kink, overstimulation
i love gentle things <3 and i LOVE minghao ;( also been thinking about his lips recently…
would be so nice to lay in bed with him all day, just worshiping each other for hours. you’d just cuddle and lazily make out, running your hands over each other’s bodies to feel close with one another. everything would be so warm and loving and comfortable, you’d find the most comfort in each other after long days of work. he’d hold your hands while he thrusts into you sensually, pressing sweet kisses all over your neck and cheeks. he’d drag his lips down the expanse of your neck, his exhales tickling you as he slowly litters pecks up your exposed skin. he just can’t ignore the other parts of your body, he feels like he needs to worship and praise every inch of you as you make love. wouldn’t take the both of you long to reach your highs after all the foreplay, and you’d wrap your legs tighter around minghao’s small waist. he’d lean in close to you, his lips gently kissing the shell of your ear. “can…can i do it inside?” he’d ask you breathlessly, sounding a bit shy as he slows his pace. you’d whimper at the idea and he’d just continue. “want to start a family with you. i’ve been thinking about it. can we start it now? oh, please let me fill you up.” and you’d just pull him in closer, wrapping your arms around his neck and threading a hand through his hair as you nod quickly. he’d help you ride out your orgasm, spilling inside of you just from the image of you cumming underneath him. he’d keep rutting his hips even after he finishes, overstimulating himself and fucking his cum deeper inside your hole just because he needs to see you full ;(
taglist: @imprettyweird , @jeonghanpill , @bangantokchy , @caratboy , @bewoyewo , @c-hanniehae , @wonvsmile , @haolovre , @aaniag , @writingbarnes
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ayyyez · 2 years ago
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Haikyuu you say? Can you do kageyama, goshiki, and Tsuki headcanons? Their love languages, relationship headcanons sfw and nsfw, or anything you want!!
A/N: Bless youuuu! Thank you for sending one in for me and oh this ones really good! I love options. YES KAGS! Some characters I haven't done yet yeeees. I can do this for sure <3
TAGS: relationship headcanons, love languages, dating them headcanons, fluff, smut under the cut, each one has a little bit of smut after the fluff, praise, words of affirmation, physical touch, quality time
CHARACTERS: Kageyama Tobio, Tsukishima Kei, Goshiki Tsutomu
KAGEYAMA TOBIO:
Kind of awkward almost shy in the beginning like he's afraid of doing something wrong to ruin your relationship. He's aware that the things he says can be taken the wrong way and doesn't want that to happen with you.
If you ask him about it he will just 'I'm sorry, I don't want to mess this up.'
'Mess what up?'
'Us.' He's so serious too, blush over his cheeks and everything.
You have to set him straight and assure him it's fine to mess up. You're not going to break up with him over a misunderstanding. Plus you know what he's like by now.
Give him a reassuring hug and maybe a big smooch and he's all better. Also, he's a sucker for head pats, especially if your fingers really work and get tangled in there. He pushes into your touch like he craves it.
Tobio wants to be good for you so he feels reassured by this even more. He's your good boy.
Speaking of wanting to be good, words of affirmation are very big for him in terms of love languages. Praising him and acknowledging him is assure way into his heart.
Tell him things like 'Wow that set was so impressive!' and 'I never get tired of watching you play.' It really brightens his day. It also gets him going~ if you know what I mean.
Tell him you love him, little compliments about his outfits, that you appreciate him. These all go a long way. 'Damn baby you're looking extra good today!'
He stops and blushes all bashful before a smile crosses his lips. 'Thanks.' He says, pressing a kiss to your temple. 'You look good too.' His hands slide up and down your sides. 'But you always look good.'
'Well aren't you sweet.'
Even that gives him a little extra pep him his step. Being told he is sweet. Because he'll be anything for you! Sweet, loving, affectionate. As long as he can be yours.
Likes spending time just the two of you at home for dates. But isn't afraid to also take you out and spoil you. Kind of gets a sense of pride holding your hand in public.
Also big on other kinds of physical touch but more in private. Relies on you to recharge his battery after a long day. Just falls against you and cuddles.
Craves your warmth and affection. Wants you to stroke his hair. Likes it when you whisper those sweet affirmations to him at the same time.
Likes lying on top of you and pressing his face against your chest. Kind of has thing for you chest. Also a thing for squeezing your chest. The size doesn't matter nor does it matter if you've got breasts or pecs, he's just fixated there.
There are times he likes to just bury himself there, mouth attached to your nipple, sucking and licking to his hearts content. Will nip just to play around.
Works the other nipple with his fingers. Sometimes is there for ages ignoring how hard he is in his sweats.
It doesn't matter that he's been leaking pre-cum for ages. He contents himself by thrusting against you every now and again to relieve it.
It's not until your hands thread into his hair, tug at the roots and pull him up that he remembers to continue to the next step. He's a little dazed and starry eyed so bear with him.
Then your hands are on his cock and he's whining, begging for you to make him cum after he's edged himself for so long without even realising it.
TSUKISHIMA KEI
Tsukishima held his cards close to his chest until the moment the confession came and then all of a sudden he's dating you and he's not really sure how to switch to being vulnerable.
His cards don't all come down onto the table right away.
You've sort of got to pry them from him or just wait until he naturally gives them to you (either way he needs little pushes because he's rather stubborn).
He's not overly affectionate and sappy. But will catch you of guard sometimes with soft smiles or stares in your direction.
'What?' You'll ask.
'I'm just looking. Got a problem with that?'
'Not if you give me a kiss.'
'Tch.' Gives you one anyway. And not just some cheap chaste kiss. Puts the whole Tsukki back into it. A big old passionate kiss.
'Happy now?'
'Not quite.'
Rolls his eyes but he's smirking because yeah he's coming in for another kiss. and another and another. The kiss deepens and ohh here comes that tongue at a steady pace. Nice and easy. But oh does it take your breath away.
He can be sweet and a little shit all at once.
Will walk over and bonk you on the head for attention. The second you whip around to scold him he will steal a kiss. Sometimes its on the forehead, other times its the cheek but there's other times its smack bang on the lips.
Pulls away smirking like. 'Hey.'
Punch him honestly, he will just give you another one. Or laugh. Which ever one you don't mind about.
Loves to tease you but really enjoys partners who keep him in check about being a shit or tease him back. Humble him he finds it hot. Will be all 'Tch.' but inside he's like 'Damn, you really can handle me.' Wants to kiss you real bad but won't if it's in public. Just gets all smirky lol.
His love language probably falls more on the quality time side of things. Just being able to hang out and exist together is most important to him.
It doesn't always have to be big dates. He's good with easy hangouts at home with homecooked meals, watching movies together, listening to music and just chilling. Prefers it honestly.
He does, not that he'll admit it out loud, like going out occassionally just to show off that you're together. Kind of has this complex about it. Feels a rush of superiority having been the one to bag you. Drapes an arm around your shoulder or waist proudly, head held high. Ha, you're his.
The complex kind of falls in reverse though in terms of making him feel a little self conscious. Feels like he doesn't deserve you sometimes. Doesn't seek reassurance but tries not to be such an asshole from time to time.
Goes through 'I've gotta be good for you.' Phases. Where he thinks he really needs to be better. You can pick up on it and assure him he's fine, just a little prickly sometimes. 'Aren't we all?'
Huffs when you pepper kisses all over his face to make him feel better. Appreciates it though.
Does appreciate and crave a bit of that physical touch too. Isn't always good at initiating it. Sometimes sits there craving it while staring holes into the back of your head.
That's your cue to climb on into his lap and just hold him and kiss him all over. Nip and suck at his neck to hear those sweet gasps and moans.
His hands will find your waist and hold you tight. That allows you to naturally push down against him. Before you know it the two of you are grinding together.
Exchanging kisses, touches and and dry humping all the way to that sweet friction until that final release. He's not even embarrassed because hey, the both of you got lost in the moment.
The two of you are just crazy about each other.
GOSHIKI TSUTOMU
This guy omg, he flits between hell yeah you're going out with him to wow he can't believe you're actually going out with him. Bear with him alright? He's a bit all over the place emotionally.
The biggest sweetie though. Like, he always has your best interests at heart but is super self sacrificing at the start.
You have to be like boy! You need to tell me what you want too! This relationship is between two people! Please!
Appreciates you so much for it. Takes awhile to get there but is finally to be able start actually breaking that habit and tell you how he's feeling and what he wants to do.
Takes you on cute little dates. Starts wanting to show off in other ways other than just his volleyball skills. (totally compliment him on those btw he will love you forever)
Shows off by taking you to restaurants he thinks you'll like. Really gushes if he is right and you like the food. 'I'm just really good at picking places, I'm so glad you like the food.'
You snort but don't pay it much mind. 'Sure thanks for bringing me.'
You've got to give it to him for at least getting his confidence back right? It's kind of sweet.
Always asks permission to do things, like even the little things, doesn't just do it. 'Can I hold your hand?' or 'Can I hold you.' even 'Can I kiss you.' It's very endearing.
He has a blush on his cheeks every time even after you've been in a relationship for awhile. It's not that he's nervous anymore he's just really excited still. He will always be exited to be with you!
Really wants you to be at his games (if you can). He says it gives him extra strength knowing you're there cheering him on in person. Always asks for a kiss before the match too. It's for luck.
If you can't make it to the game he will ask for two extra kisses for EXTRA luck. Honestly he will just miss you but you don't need to know that. He also just likes kissing you.
The first time he tried to kiss you he accidentally got your nose. Was so embarrassed you had to grab him and kiss him to make him calm down. It didn't calm him down but it made him stop babbling lmao.
His love language is also Word of affirmation so praise that guy! Tell him you appreciate him and that he's the coolest, most talented guy you know.
One time, in bed while you were giving him a handjob you told him that he was the hottest, strongest ace you've ever seen and he let out the loudest moan and came right there and then. You just caressed his face and stroked him through it.
That's how you learnt that words of praise REALLY affected him. Especially in the bedroom. You could be in the middle of making out or having sex and a few praising words will having him moaning and tettering on the edge.
It's fascinating to watch just how quickly his brows knit together and his whines spill out.
Goshiki is very big on reciprocation too. He never likes to leave you hanging if he cums first. A bit of an overachiever too. If he cums once before you, he wants to make you cum twice.
Will spend hours going down on you. Kissing and biting up and down your thighs. Sometimes gets a bit hung up marking you he needs some help getting directions back to the main event.
Won't ever forget to please you though. Just likes to admire every inch of your body first.
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miraclewoozi · 1 year ago
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NETFLIX AND-- ? - c.hs
you try everything in your power to try and help your workaholic boyfriend unwind on his night off. you quickly find out that vernon doesn’t know how to just do nothing.
pair; vernon x fem reader. genre; domestic smut. MINORS DNI. wc; 2.3k (short n sweet <3) note; saw a prompt while i was scrolling through some things and it had me feeling feelings. experiencing experiences. apparently i am soft needy for him today. barely proof read. smut tags utc. xoxo
smut tags; soft!dom/service top vernon but he’s also a fucking tease. fingering (f rec). sort of edging, more of a continued stop/start. squirting. implied that vernon has a praise kink (shock horror). let me know if i've forgotten any.<3
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in your defence, you started out with perfectly innocent intentions. 
vernon works himself too hard. you wish he wouldn’t, but he does — it’s a fact, and even though he’ll always shake his head and deny it, you know it’s true. self care, to him, is working. it’s in the fulfilment from a job well done. it’s the clap on a shoulder from a higher-up that recognises how hard he’s been slaving away at his computer screen. it’s in getting results, and he doesn’t get results if he doesn’t do. if he doesn’t maintain. if he doesn’t nigh-on exhaust himself for the sake of the company he’s employed by.
so, you’ve made a plan. on friday, in the few hours he’ll have free between finishing work and settling down to sleep, you’re going to do whatever you can to look after him.
it starts with dinner. heartfelt, home-cooked food. he drops his bag by the front door and his entire face turns so soft he thinks it might melt clean off him. the aromas from the kitchen hit him and he floats across the apartment like a cartoon, all the way to where you’re stood waiting for him, a sort of dopey grin spreading across every single one of his features. 
“that smells so good,” he whines, putting his arms around your waist and nuzzling into your neck. when you ask how his day went, he says he doesn’t remember, he doesn’t care. because he’s home now, and because loves you so much — he doesn’t want to think about anything else.
he clings to you until the food is ready and laid out on the dining table, only pulling himself away when it becomes apparent that he’s not going to be able to have his dinner sitting in your lap.
you eat together with the lights slightly dimmed, a few candles illuminating the table. you talk, a little, but the quiet that surrounds the bubbles of conversation is just as comfortable, so neither of you are bothered when your minds are more focused on the food in front of you than conversing with each other. after, he helps you clear the dishes and stack them over by the sink: you’ll deal with them later on. 
your hand finds his, then, fingers intertwining, and vernon lets himself be dragged all the way to your bedroom. he changes out of his work clothes, tosses them into the laundry basket, and slips into an old, worn, stained and atrociously ugly pair of sweatpants instead. he bypasses a shirt at your instruction and lies face-down with his head nestled between the pillows. 
with one of his own playlists already filling the air around you, you straddle over his hips and start to massage your way up his back. your hands smooth over his skin, thumbs working at a couple of tight spots that have him gasping and grunting, threading his fingers through his own hair to try and keep still. it hurts a bit, but it’s a good kind of pain. so, he lets you work your magic on him; vernon feels all soft and loose, a bit like a deflated balloon animal, by the time you sit up enough for him to be able to roll over between your legs and face you again.
“i thought we could watch a movie tonight, too,” you say quietly, just barely audible over the soft r&b tune in the background. your fingertips tickle up and down his sides as you speak; he sighs at the softness of your touch. “anything you want.”
“what’s all this in aid of, exactly?” he asks, quirking up an eyebrow. his voice is deep and kind of  rough-edged. the way you like it most.
you laugh, quietly, and bend low to kiss the corner of his mouth, caging him in with your forearms either side of his head. “just… because i love you.”
his hands snake up your body to rest against your cheeks and he holds you in place for a second longer. one of the many, many things you love about vernon is the way he kisses you. every time, like it’s the first time. (a symptom of being a closeted rom-com enthusiast, perhaps?) but each press of his lips to yours is always so infused with passion: even the small ones, like this. with his eyes closed, his nose pressed to your cheek, the corners of his mouth pulled up into a shy smile. there’s adoration in every single moment. 
you roll off him when he lets go of you and sit up against the headboard, letting him go through the motions of choosing something for you to watch. a few minutes (and no less than three coin tosses to make the decision) later, you open an arm out for him at the sound of the movie starting, and he curls up into your side. his head rests peacefully on your shoulder, one of his legs hooked over one of yours, your arm snaked around his back. you settle into each other’s embrace in a way that you’ve not had time to do in a long while, matching hums of tranquillity vibrating in both of your throats.
the grand budapest hotel has only been playing for about twenty minutes when you feel him start to move slightly, the tips of his fingers gliding slowly across the hem of your t-shirt. you don’t make anything of it at first, because vernon has always had slightly restless hands, no matter what he’s doing. this is very normal for him. he’s probably just mindlessly feeling the fabric beneath his touch as he watches one of his favourite movies.
another few minutes pass and you feel his nails drag against the bare skin of your tummy. you raise an eyebrow and look at him, but his eyes are trained on the tv, even if one side of his mouth is lifted up in a sly kind of smile.
“what are you doing, babe?” you ask him. he lifts his head from its place on your shoulder and shrugs.
“nothing.”
“mhm, sure you aren’t.”
his hand moves down, then. down, towards your shorts. down, to where his palm wraps around your thigh, half resting on the material of your clothes and half sitting on your bare leg. his fingers make small, light, circular movements against your skin and he nudges your other thigh over slightly with the knee he settled between your legs earlier, effectively spreading you open for him. just a little.
just enough.
“vernon,” you chuckle, but you don’t make any attempt to move your legs back together. “come on, relax. watch your movie.”
“i am,” he says matter-of-factly, not taking his eyes off the screen. “wish i could say the same for you, though.”
“you’re terrible,” you sigh. 
“mm. no, i’m not.”
he creeps further and further up your thigh, until his hand has slipped completely under your loose fitting sleep shorts and he’s effectively pulling them to one side. a breath catches in your throat and you accidentally arch a little as you feel him brush over your underwear.
“watch the movie,” he says, a little more sternly, and you swallow thickly but settle down more comfortably again. if this is how he chooses to decompress… who are you to stop him, really?
but he knows you too well. knows your body like it’s his own. knows exactly how to make you tick without making you jump his bones and take control. his thumb starts to trace small circles over your covered clit, eliciting quiet gasps from your mouth, but every time you react – what he deems to be – a little too much, he stops. removes the pressure. leaves you to squirm.
“vernon,” you sigh after the third time, agitated but needy and squaring your jaw at his teasing. your panties are soaked by now and you need to feel more of him, but your boyfriend seems to be more than happy to work you up on his own terms. how long will he keep going like this for? there’s at least an hour left of the film; surely he won’t make you wait that long?
“focus, baby.”
or maybe, he will.
his lips find home at the base of your neck and he presses a series of small kisses to your skin, returning his thumb to your panties and rubbing you through them a little harder, pressing the fabric into your heat, smirking at the way your arousal seeps through them and coats his fingertips. your breaths start to pick up again, and you do everything you can to stop him from noticing, but he’s maybe a little too caught up sucking the sweet spot behind your ear to notice how fast your heart is beating from the way he touches you.
so when he drags your underwear out of the way and slides an elegant finger through your folds, you really don’t think you can be blamed for the fact that an unstifled moan leaves your lips.
vernon disagrees, though. because of course he fucking does.
“baby,” he challenges you, his finger just millimetres away from your clit when he stops moving it. “come on. you wanted to help me unwind tonight, didn’t you? that’s what all this was. you were being good to me.”
you nod at him, and he kisses your neck again.
“then watch.”
keeping your mouth tightly shut and fighting against the noises that your body so desperately wants you to make, you let him continue. you let him trace your arousal over your clit, let him dip his finger lower and press just enough inside you that your walls flutter around it. you let him work deeper, and add a second, and try your best not to clamp your legs around his poor wrist when he brushes against the sweet-spot inside you the way that only he knows how.
“s’that feel good, baby?” he asks you.
your eyes are all but glazed over and you don’t think you really know what’s going on in the movie anymore. you can’t remember the names of the characters. is there even a plot? or is it all just pretty, symmetrical imagery now? who the hell is the person that just showed up – surely you haven’t seen him, yet? fuck, you’re completely, hopelessly lost in his fingers and the way they’re buried inside your pussy. every reaction you want to give, you can’t, and it’s so difficult. 
but you nod at him anyway, because the least you can do is tell him he’s doing a good job. he likes to hear that sort of thing. 
and if there’s any dialogue in the grand budapest hotel, you don’t have a damn clue what’s being said. his fingers move faster inside you and the heel of his hand puts enough pressure on your clit that all of your muscles are tight in an attempt to do what he’s asked. the only sounds in your ears are the smacking of his lips on your throat and the lewd noises that come from the way your pussy sucks his digits in deeper. 
you feel like a little toy, wound up to high heaven. waiting, waiting, waiting to be released. waiting to fall into oblivion.
“vernon,” you gasp eventually, silently begging that he won’t stop, that he won’t leave you hanging when you’re so close to the edge.
thankfully, he doesn’t.
“mhm?” he curls his fingers again, a little harder, making you buck up into his hand. whatever game he was playing, he seems to be moving past it now. maybe he wants you to come as much as you do.
“close,” you strain. he nods, slowly, positioning his wrist differently so that he can lay his thumb over your clit instead. the much more deliberate pressure has you seconds away from seeing stars.
“m’gonna ask you about this movie tomorrow, you know,” he chuckles, but he doesn’t slow. he fucks his fingers into you over and over, bringing you closer and closer, and when your toes curl, when you grip his wrist with one hand, when your head falls back against the headboard –
euphoria rushes through you. wetness gushes from you. you feel your pussy contract around his fingers, hugging them tight even though your release tries to expel them; he lets you ride the high out, lets you make a mess on his hand as your hips roll down to meet him, a series of whines and moans falling from your lips. his own continue their gentle caress of your neck. you’re in bliss.
he pulls his fingers from you when you tug at his wrist to tell him to do so, lifting them to his mouth and sucking them clean of your arousal and your release. you close your eyes when he kisses you deeply, letting you taste yourself on his tongue, and his (granted, still kind of sticky) hand comes up to cup your face. 
adoration in every moment. like it’s the first.
“don’t bother asking me about it,” you tell him as he pulls away, bumping your nose against his and hearing, from the quiet wet smacking sound they make, how his lips grow into a smile. “i don’t know anything that happened.”
“this is the fourth time i’ve tried to get you to watch this movie, y/n,” he chuckles. 
“and this is the fourth time we’ve ended up here. what, does tilda swinton in that ugly wig really do it for you or something?”
“shut up,” he snorts, ever so gently pushing your cheek to move your head away from him. “no-one ever said you had to give into me that easily.”
“oh, you shut up,” you huff, closing your thighs and feeling how your shorts and panties cling to you uncomfortably, only half covering you after he failed to put them back properly. “i was supposed to be helping you chill out. it’s not my fault that you can’t go five minutes without getting handsy.”
“it’s absolutely your fault,” he challenges, getting to his knees and facing you. you can see his cock tenting his sweatpants now and you’d be lying to say that it doesn’t stir something in the depths of your stomach. “you know i can’t resist you in those shorts.”
“you’re so stupid,” you grin, opening your legs up for him to settle between, and he moves over straight away.
“yeah, well,” he chuckles, reaching down to pull your t-shirt up off your head. “you happen to love my kind of stupid.”
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thank u sm for reading!! likes, reblogs, comments + feedback are all greatly appreciated!<3
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bucksangel · 8 months ago
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angel ik it’s about 12 hours later since you posted about being bored and wanting some asks, but i’ve just woken up and am just imagining how it would feel waking up next to bucky, him trying to pull you back into bed with “come back to bed doll, it’s too early to get up” as he basically drags you into him so he can have you in his arms again. (can you tell i want a bucky to stop me from going to work by basically suffocating me in his arms) 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
ok ok but same?? i just woke up and thank GOD i don't have to work today bc if i did and had a bucky in my bed i'd be forced to call out bc there's no way i'm gonna pass up the opportunity to get squished to death between those arms
and now you've given me inspo so here you go <3 (this is also the shortest thing i've ever written it feels weird)
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Just One More
pairing: bucky barnes x reader
word count: 828
warnings: fluff fluff fluff, kissing and smooching, that's it i think
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Everything is soft, warm, and hazy, it’s almost like being wrapped in the morning sun's rays as you float across the sky on a cloud. True peace exists only at this moment; Bucky’s arms are wrapped around your body, sleeping with his head on your chest while you run your fingers through his hair, absentmindedly kissing the top of his head.
But then your damn alarm decides to go off louder than ever - the alarm’s tone doesn’t change, it just always seems to be louder whenever you’re too comfortable to get out of bed. And dear Lord you don’t want to. You want to stay right here all day, only getting up to eat or use the bathroom. Other than that, you’d be adamant that neither of you were to leave your little bubble of love.
You’re nearly unable to reach your phone due to Bucky lying almost fully on top of you, but you manage to snag it before the alarm gives him a rude wake-up. Upon stopping it, you drop your phone on the pillow next to you, wrapping your arm around Bucky’s back again to rub up and down in a soothing motion. He stirs under your touch, rubbing his face into your chest like he’s a cat burrowing into a blanket, hiding from the world in the hopes of being allowed a few more minutes of sleep.
He groans when you laugh, your fingernails scratching at his scalp.
“Honey?” You whisper softly, kissing his forehead. “Baby, come on, we have to get up.”
“No,” he grunts, blindly reaching up one of his arms so he can cover your eyes with his hand. “Go back to sleep.”
You can’t help but laugh a little louder, especially when Bucky starts grumbling about needing his beauty sleep.
“You’re beautiful enough,” you say with a smile, grabbing his wrist and pulling his hand off of your face so you can kiss his palm. “We need to get ready.”
Huffing, Bucky lifts his head, blinking several times before giving you a look so mean that others might be afraid, but it only makes you giggle harder. He’s such a baby. And it’s absolutely impossible not to kiss that pout off of his face, so you do. You press a soft, lingering kiss to his plush lips until he stops his whining and leans into it. But then you pull away, and Bucky pouts again.
“You’re going to wake me up and only give me one kiss?” He huffs again as he lifts himself off of your body so he can hover over you, one hand planted next to your head while the other grabs your left hand, threading your fingers together and bringing them up to his mouth so he can kiss your knuckles. “You know I’m going to need at least three more before I can even consider letting you out of this bed.”
“Three?” You ask with a laugh, using your free hand to cup his cheek. “How about two?”
“Four,” He grunts, eyes squinting.
“One?”
“Now that’s just rude!” Bucky exclaims as he pulls further back so he can truly look at you so incredulously that you can’t help but laugh again. “One kiss isn’t good enough. I need five.”
“Oh, now it’s five kisses?” Your giggling continues when he nods, dipping down to steal one. “How about this: I give you four more kisses and then we get up and get ready. Then I’ll give you another five kisses before we leave. Deal?”
Bucky sighs, knowing he’s lost this battle. Damn you and your tempting lips.
“Fine,” He grumbles, leaning down again.
With each kiss he gives you, you mumble one, two, three. But the final kiss gets a little more heated. His tongue slips through your lips and into your mouth, neither of you caring about the fact that you haven’t brushed your teeth yet. How can you when the man you love is so adamant about showing his affection for you that he gets genuinely upset when he can’t even hold your hand?
Before you lose yourself too far in the kiss, you pull away breathlessly. “Four.”
Bucky sighs, pulling away and rolling off your body. He gives you his best puppy dog eyes while you sit up and stretch, letting the blanket fall into your lap. It’s just as you move to get out of bed when he grabs your wrist again.
“Baby,” He says, causing you to turn and look at him with a playfully raised eyebrow. “Just one more?”
He smiles when you roll your eyes because just like he can never say no to you, he knows that you’d never deny him of anything that makes him happy. One final time, you lean over and kiss him, pulling away almost immediately so he can’t wrap his arms around you - because then you know you’d never leave the bed.
“Now, come on. We can’t be late to our own wedding.”
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toomuchracket · 11 months ago
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all i want for christmas (birthday party!matty x reader fluff)
back from the dead (a depressive episode) with a fluffy pre-dating fic that's honestly longer than it needs to be. whatever. it's christmas. this fic is also part of christmas75/twelve days of christmas, organised and curated by my lovely friend @abiiors. hope you all enjoy <3
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wednesday, 3:34am
as soon as the “email sent” pop-up appears, you feebly close your laptop and lay your head on the desk, ready to finally give in to the sleep that's been edging ever closer to your eyelids for the past hour. but before you get the chance, your phone buzzes with an incoming notification, the vibrations rattling through the wood of the desk and into your skull.
swearing, your voice scratchy with underuse, you open one eye and tilt the screen towards you - the name it bears above the unread text makes you shoot back up to a sitting position, and knocks all traces of grumpiness and tiredness from your brain and body.
matty.
pointedly ignoring the butterflies in your stomach when you see he's opened his message with hi, darling, you continue reading: hope you're alright, and that the new book isn't kicking your arse too much. saw a group of kids in barnes & noble raving about your last one earlier. would've joined them if i wasn't in a hurry, to be honest. fucking brilliant. anyway, i know it's late, but i had to text you before i forgot. can you give me a call when you get this, darling? flying home early tomorrow so i'll be up from about… 8am your time? i've got a favour to ask you. nothing crazy, though, and nothing urgent. but yeah, just phone me when you can. thanks, darling. miss you, talk to you soon. bye! X
just as you're reeling from the three darlings and the kiss and the miss you, another text from your best friend comes in, accompanied by a photo: also look at who you were next to on this display. i got so excited. my three favourites!
you laugh out loud, a combination of shock at the fact your collection is between slouching towards bethlehem and consider the lobster and adoration at matty's beaming face next to it all. fuck, he's cute.
so cute. enough for you to forget that it’s 3 o'clock in the morning, and happily pick up your phone and dial his number - you've spent so much time poring over your message threads that you know it off by heart - as if it was mid-afternoon. you kick your legs back and forth as the call connects, smiling to yourself at the thought of hearing his voice for the first time in over a month.
luckily, you don't have long to wait; your heart flutters as he picks up on the second ring, voice thick in the way it only goes when he's smoking. “you know, you didn't have to call me right away, darling. thought you'd have been asleep. but hiya!”
“hi, matty,” you smile. “and come on, it's deadline week, of course my sleep schedule is fucked. questioning why i'm not asleep, christ, thought you knew me better than that.”
he takes your teasing in good faith. “i do, darling, i do know you,” matty's voice is soft, his tone as tender as you've ever heard it. it's driving you batshit insane. “but you know me. i just want to make sure you're not stressing yourself out about your work too much. rather have my best friend's wellbeing intact than another book, even though your writing is my favourite. speaking of, that display! i'm recreating it at home. genuinely. s'amazing.”
you can feel your cheeks burning. “i can't even comprehend that display right now, m'too tired. but i’ll text you my thoughts once they make sense. and i'm alright, matty, honest. please don't worry about me, lovely.”
“that'll never happen, and you know it.”
“god, you're obstinate. but thanks. i appreciate the care.”
“even when you're insulting me, you're so eloquent. you've got a gift,” matty laughs down the phone. “how's deadline week going, anyway?”
“it's done. just sent the final draft away for edits. s'why i'm still up, actually.”
“really? congrats, darling!” the genuine happiness in his tone makes your heart hurt. “god, i wish i was home now, so we could go out and celebrate.”
“me too. but we'll see each other this weekend for early christmas dinner, yeah?”
“that's what i wanted to talk to you about, actually. you know those roast potatoes you made last year?”
“you mean the ones you and alexa fought over the last spoonful of?” you laugh, remembering the two of them racing to the tiny kitchen in your flat to try and nab them.
“m'still fucking fuming that she got them. bitch,” matty grumbles, then giggles. “nah, she's like my sister, i love her. but yeah, those potatoes. can i have the recipe for them, please?”
you suck air in through your teeth. “well… no. that’s a family secret, lovely. m'sorry.”
“oh,” matty sounds so genuinely deflated that you could cry - you seldom see him upset, but the thought of his pretty face all sad makes you feel incredibly guilty. “that's alright, darling, i understand. my nana was the same with her soup recipes. you'd have to marry me if you wanted them.”
you hum out a laugh, brain suddenly scrambled at the thought of walking down the aisle towards him. god. get a grip! 
scrunching your eyes closed and blinking them open again - a tried and tested way to stop yourself going off on tangents - an idea pops into your head, so obvious that you’re not sure why you haven't suggested it already. “well, in lieu of us getting hitched within the next week,” you smile, enjoying the way matty laughs softly at the other end of the line. “i could come over early to yours and make the potatoes for you, if you'd like?”
“i quite like the sound of the first option, to be honest…”
what the fuck?! you have to clap a hand over your mouth to stop a gasp. or a scream. perhaps even a moan.
“...but i'm more than happy with the second one. thank you, darling,” matty's smile is as audible as his relief. “you're a lifesaver and a legend. come over whenever on sunday, yeah? wake me up if you have to. actually, no, i'll pick you up. s'the least i could do to thank you. and it means we get to spend even more time together.”
“that sounds nice,” you all but sigh into your phone. “i'm excited to see everyone.”
mostly you, though.
“as am i, darling,” matty yawns. it's the cutest sound you've ever heard. for fuck's sake. “m'not bored talking to you, honest, just tired. this is actually the most fun i've had in weeks, this phone call.”
you want to assume he's lying out of politeness, but something in your brain tells you he's being sincere; it's not like you can say anything to dispute him, either, given it's also the most fun you've had in weeks. “matty, you’re in new york. at christmas time.”
“yeah, alone! s'boring. macaulay culkin made it seem a lot more fun when i was a kid,” matty snorts. “plus, i saw you the last time i was here. any trip you're not on is just automatically a bad one.”
christ, what is with him today? “flatterer,” you smirk, before grimacing and continuing to talk. “but i assume you've not been… totally alone, the whole time? i don't like the thought of that being the case.”
you hope to god he's too tired to pick up on your actual meaning; the sight of him with another girl isn’t unfamiliar to you, but that isn’t to say you don't mind it. quite the opposite, in fact.
thank christ, he misses it. “no, i’ve been good. slept by myself every night,” he laughs.
you giggle, relieved. “really? wow.”
“why are you surprised at that?”
“you're you, matty.”
“yeah, well, i'm going through a metamorphosis-”
“kafkaesque of you.”
“knew that one was coming as soon as i said it,” matty sighs. “but in all seriousness, in the past couple of months, i've just… fully realised what i want in life, you know? and it's not what i used to want, or get up to.”
interesting. “well, that's good. m'happy for you, lovely.”
“yeah, thanks. and what about you, miss? you, um, bringing anyone to christmas dinner?”
you snort. “obvs not.”
matty hums. “why'd you say it like that?”
“like what?”
“like,” he pauses, trying to find the words. you can just picture the shape of his eyebrows as he does. “derisively. as if it's a silly question.”
“because it is a silly question, matty.”
“is it?”
“yeah,” you giggle. “i wouldn't even have time for a one night stand, let alone a relationship. not that there's anyone particularly interested, right now, anyway.”
“oh, there is,” comes the reply. “there really is.”
“if you say so.”
“believe me, darling, people want you. they're down bad. totally in love with you.”
“oh, you are so high right now, aren't you?”
“i mean, yeah. but i'm right!”
“uh huh,” you smirk. “i think you need your bed, matty.”
“pot, kettle.”
“alright, point taken,” you peel yourself off your chair, joints cracking slightly worryingly as you stand and pad across the flat to your room. “i'm going there now.”
matty sighs happily. “good. but send me a selfie as proof. accountability and all.”
it's an innocent enough ask, and not a totally unprecedented one - in the times where your self-neglect was at its worst, you would send matty and your other friends selfies so they could make sure you were alright - but the concept of sending matty a late-night pic from your bed does something quite odd to your brain and stomach.
still, you’ll oblige. but will he?
matty giggles when you ask him as much. “yeah, i'll send you one in return. i'm all about reciprocation, me.”
the words leave your mouth before you can stop them. “good to know.”
he laughs, that stupid hyena cackle of his that might be your favourite sound in the world. “christ, i've missed you.”
“it's reciprocated,” you smile, switching your phone between hands as you get into bed and hissing quietly at how cold the sheets are. “alright, i'm in my bed. and you should be too.”
“you're right, i should be,” matty says. his voice is lower than you've ever heard it, the rasp of his cigarettes prominent; despite yourself, it goes straight between your legs. “soon, though, darling. promise.”
“good,” your voice comes out breathier than expected, a setting you haven't used in some time. “i think we both need it.”
“yeah, i think we do, too,” matty yawns again, following it up with a sigh. “right. i'm going to hang up now, darling. i really don't want to, but i feel like if i don't then one of us is gonna fall asleep before we can exchange pics. and i can't be having that, honestly. miss looking at you.”
you giggle, rolling onto your stomach and kicking your legs back and forth. jesus christ, what is this man doing to you? “don't get too excited, i look like shit.”
well, you've looked worse lately - you at least showered and clipped your hair up and put on a clean outfit today. but still, far less glamorous than matty's used to.
or not - “i've literally held your hair back while you yoshed in a plant pot, darling, i think you're alright.”
“and on that note, let's wrap it up,” you laugh, rolling back to lie down. “what time should i be ready for on sunday?”
“oh, um… half twelve? that should be enough time to get everything sorted.”
“half twelve it is,” you yawn. “ok. bedtime. have a safe flight, lovely. talk soon?”
“‘course. don't forget that selfie, by the way. eagerly awaiting it.”
“et toi. lots of love, see you soon.”
“back at you, darling. goodnight.”
the call ends. you close your eyes and, for the briefest of moments, let yourself dwell on the fact your best friend - who, let's be honest, you have a bit of a crush on - shamelessly flirted with you to the point of bordering on phone sex, and let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe, there's a chance he might feel the same way you do.
but it's matty. sweet, cheeky, affectionate matty, who'd find a way to flirt with a brick wall if he was bored enough. because that's what he is, really - bored, high, alone on a phone call with a girl late at night. it's just a natural thing for him to do in those circumstances. you're not special, you were just… there.
that notion stings more than you expected. but you persevere, opening your camera and fixing your glasses. he's your best friend, after all, and he asked you to do this to make sure you were alright. nothing more than that.
still, as you close your eyes and smile, you hold the phone with both hands so your boobs push ever so slightly more together. just in case. then you caption the pic as requested, and hit send.
matty’s reply buzzes in a few seconds later, eliciting a shocked giggle from your lips: fucking love it when you wear your glasses. a follow-up appears in another few seconds: if that's you looking like shit… you're defo the sexiest bit of shit i've ever seen.
fuck him for getting you flustered like this. honestly, fuck him.
and, oh, when he sends a selfie in return, shirtless in low light, hair in its natural state, one hand behind his head… don't you want to do just that?
you bite your lip as you compose your response: my condolences to the single girls in nyc who are missing out on you looking like that tonight.
matty: i know, poor them lol. but their loss is one specific single girl in london’s gain, though, yeah?
you: fuck yeah
matty: you crack me up
matty: miss you sm
matty: anyway, sweet dreams. see you in them, i hope
matty: but see you irl on sunday lol xx
you: miss you too, lovely. goodnight xx
***
sunday, 12:56pm
a mass of black fur rams into your legs as soon as you step through matty's front door. you laugh, dropping your bags and crouching to pet an over-excited mayhem, while matty grumbles behind you. “at least let her get in the house, mayhem, christ!”
“don't listen to him,” you coo at the dog, nuzzling into you quite adorably. “i'm just as happy to see you as you are to see me, baby. got a present for you and everything.”
“you did not buy the dog a christmas present,” matty groans, gently pulling the coat from your shoulders.
“of course i did. got you one as well.”
“thought we agreed we weren't doing presents this year?”
“well, i'm a dirty liar,” you brush down your dress and turn to face matty, smiling. “that, and i saw something when i was in glasgow that i couldn't resist getting you.”
matty's eyes widen near-imperceptibly as he takes in the dark red fabric clinging to you like a second skin, raking up and down your body almost too quickly for you to clock. 
almost. you bite back a smirk. got him!
much to your chagrin, though, he recovers quickly and turns the tables. “well, it's difficult to keep control when you see something… attractive,” he murmurs, gaze lifting to meet yours. “i like that dress, darling, you look gorgeous. and,” his tone and face brighten. “i actually got you a gift, too.”
the revelation is just as shocking as the way he looked at you is. “you did?”
“we're both dirty liars, it seems,” matty grins. he nods towards the kitchen. “make yourself comfortable in there, darling, and i'll go and get it. only be two minutes, promise, and then i'll help you find whatever you need, yeah?”
“you've not done a mad rearranging of your kitchen cupboards since the last time we all came over for dinner, have you?”
“nah.”
you wave nonchalantly. “then i'm good, i know where everything i need is.”
matty smiles down at you - there's an expression in his eyes that you can't quite name - and gently nudges you down the hall. his hand is light against your back, but it sends shockwaves through your nervous system regardless. “alright. give me a shout if you need anything, though, please.”
“i will, lovely,” you smile back just as sweetly. “want me to put some christmas music on? get into the festive spirit and all?”
“anything but band aid.”
you laugh, and matty joins in. “i was thinking more sinatra, anyway.”
“perfect.”
and that's exactly how he'd describe the scene in the kitchen he walks into thirty minutes later. the room is warm, made cosy by the oven that's been slow-cooking turkey for a little while now, soundtracked by frank crooning out have yourself a merry little christmas. mayhem snoozes in his bed by the massive window, which shows snow dusting over the garden like icing sugar on a cake, and then there's you. still keeping an eye on the potatoes bubbling on the hob, you sway gently to the music as you pour dried spices and seasonings into a bowl, your face as content as matty feels.
it breaks into a big smile when you see him in the doorway, white dress shirt hugging his chest quite deliciously. “oh! you got changed. i like it.”
“had to keep up with you, didn't i?” matty smiles, wandering into the room and laying a gift bag on the counter. he peers into the pan of potatoes. “thank you for doing this, by the way, darling. means a lot.”
he opens his arms, and you slot into them before they wrap around you tightly, resting your chin on matty's shoulder and smiling. “no one else i'd do it for.”
matty hums happily. “god, i've missed you. you're always a total peach to me. makes me feel good.”
“a peach? you've spent too much time stateside, matty,” you giggle, pulling away just enough to look at him. “thank god you're home for a bit. but thank you, lovely, i'll take the compliment.”
“for once, you'll take one,” matty teases. his face turns slightly more solemn. “yeah, m'glad to be home. it's a shame you won't be at any of the UK shows, though. i always like them more when you're there.”
“well, when hollywood calls, you have to answer,” you shrug, then smirk. “you just want me at the shows so i'll praise your narrative structuring again, don't you?”
matty's eyes close in bliss. “don’t tease, you literally barrelling towards me backstage screaming about midpoints and how proud of me you were is genuinely the best thing that's ever happened to me.”
“oh, shush,” you roll your eyes, suddenly shy.
“i'm serious! it'd be like joan telling you she thought one of your sentences had perfect structure. a writing compliment from you is a gift, darling.”
“well… thank you. and speaking of gifts,” you - with great reluctance - pull away from matty, bending down to grab a wrapped box from your bag. “here. joyeux noël.”
your best friend takes the present from you, murmuring a “thank you” and smiling at the tag addressed to him. he holds it to his ear and shakes the box, eyebrows raising at the slight rattle.
sighing, you roll your eyes. “just open it, matty.”
his face lights up. “alright.”
after carefully peeling the tag from the box and placing it in his pocket, matty tears through the paper and lifts the lid off. he squints at the sides of the smaller plastic boxes inside, before realisation hits and his jaw drops. “this is…”
“cassette recordings of ten blue nile gigs throughout the eighties and nineties, in their entirety,” you finish, smiling. “thought you'd like them.”
“like them? darling, this is- i don't even know what to say, other than thank you,” matty looks at you, awed, and pulls you into another tight hug. “how the fuck did you manage to get them?”
“the guy in one of the record shops i went into in glasgow was selling them. they're his recordings,” you say, half into matty’s neck. “and he'd digitised them, so he didn't need the tapes anymore, and he wanted them to go to someone who'd genuinely use them. remembered you saying you'd bought a tape deck, and i know how much you love that band, so… i kinda had to buy them.”
matty turns his head and presses a kiss onto your temple; while you bite the inside of your cheek to keep from screaming in delight, he speaks again. “you really are one of the best people i know. christ, i'm so overwhelmed by how perfect that present is. i need a drink,” he pulls away and heads to the fridge. “d’you fancy some champagne, darling, before i give you your gift? you might need it, actually.”
“that's not ominous at all,” you quip, then nod. “pour me a glass while i sort the potatoes and get them in the oven, please.”
matty nods, pulling out a bottle of perrier and grabbing glasses to take over to the table, while you drain and pat-dry the potatoes. he hums along to the background music while he fiddles around with the foil covering the champagne cork; you smile, eyes flicking up periodically to look at his cutely confused face, then back down to the food you're currently buttering and seasoning. it's incredibly domestic, a cosy little christmas dinner tableau, so much so that it hurts your heart to think that life isn't always like this for you and matty. and mayhem, obvs, curled up so adorably in his bed that you have to resist awwwwing every time you look at him.
still, it's hard to be melancholy when matty's irritation at the bottle foil is so amusing. you giggle at his grumbling, turning around to look at him scowl once the potatoes are safely in the oven. “need a hand?”
“no thanks, darling, i'm- ok, yeah, please,” matty sighs, leaning back in his chair and stretching. you pretend not to notice the way his shirt rides up and exposes his hip tattoo. “can't find the tab on the foil.”
“hmm, let me see,” you wander to the table and sit beside matty, moving your chair closer to him. well, to the bottle. “ah - that's because there isn't one.”
“well that's fucking stupid. how are you meant to open it?”
you smile, swiping your index nail across the foil; it slices clean through, and you're able to peel the covering off the cork. “like that. these aren't just for aesthetic purposes, you know.”
“that was actually quite hot. let me see them?” matty gently takes your hand in both of his own, admiring the abstract line pattern on your fingernails, tenderly rubbing his thumbs over the gel. “yeah, definitely hot. let me open the champagne from here though, darling, yeah? can't risk these pretty nails being damaged.”
you bite the inside of your cheek again; this time, to stop from giggling flirtily. “have at it, lovely.”
“i like it when you call me that,” matty smiles, grabbing the neck of the bottle in one hand and the cork in the other, and slowly twisting. “makes me feel good.”
“well, you are lovely,” you smile back. “and opening that champagne quite effectively, i must say.”
“learnt from the best,” matty winks. “you're right, though, it's a lot less messy. although i don't mind that, sometimes. s'fun.”
“yeah, me too,” you smirk, glad to be sitting down and not having to worry about your legs caving in at matty and his words. “kinda fun getting it all over your hand, isn't it?”
matty's eyes widen again, and the cork breaks free with a loud pop; before either of you can cringe at or make light of it, though, mayhem jolts awake with a yelp at the sound, and quickly runs over to sit at your feet. 
you coo at him, reaching down to scratch his sweet head and reassure him (and berate his dad). “aww, mayhem. you scared the baby, matty! look at him, he's terrified! s'ok, sweetheart, i'll keep you safe. come on, you can have your christmas present to cheer you up.”
matty rolls his eyes, but he can't keep the smile from his face as he watches his dog eagerly follow you to your bag. “you know, mayhem, you're such a sap, honestly.”
“oi, don't talk about my friend like that,” you frown, face lighting up as you find what you're looking for in your bag. “aha! here you go, mayhem. merry christmas.”
the dog takes the guitar-shaped dog toy with relish, plodding back over to his bed and playing with it contentedly. matty leans to the side to look at mayhem's gift, bursting into laughter when he sees it. “fucking brilliant. that'll be his new favourite, by the way. but you're his favourite, so it checks out, i s'pose.”
“really?”
“oh, he loves you. he never gets so excited to see anyone else,” matty nods, pouring champagne and sliding a glass to you. “bet he'd enjoy seeing more of you. as would i, actually - i really like spending time with you, darling.”
you nod, touched. “so do i,” you raise a glass. “to seeing more of each other next year.”
matty clinks his glass off yours, repeating your words with a soft smile. you take a sip of your respective drinks, humming in satisfaction as the champagne hits your lips. you nod again as you swallow. “christ, that's good.”
“agreed. and now that we've had a drink,” matty puts his glass down, then leans back in his chair and reaches to grab your gift from the counter. he presents it to you with a grin. “merry christmas, darling. save the box til last, yeah?”
“ok. thank you,” you smile sheepishly, opening the bag and pulling out its contents: a notebook, with a pen tucked into the front cover, a book, and a thin, a4-size box. laying them on the table, you inspect each facet of the present in turn, starting with the notebook. “a parker pen? matty, this is beautiful.”
“that one's also kinda a congratulations gift for getting your manuscript in. there's a little message on the inside, too,” comes his reply. 
you flick your gaze up to find him blushing, and it makes you smile even wider. carefully, you lift open the black cover, and find matty's familiar scrawl on the inside: to my favourite writer… this is for the next one. lots of love, matty ♡. a little giggle leaves your lips, and you reach for your friend's hand to squeeze it. “you really are the loveliest, you know.”
“shhh, it's nothing,” matty softly rubs the back of your hand with his thumb. “the next bits are the good ones, really. m'excited to see you react to them.”
“better not keep you waiting, then,” you smile, reaching for the book; you let out a little cry of excitement when you read the title. “on beauty! i haven't read this since i was at uni, my god. thanks, matty, i can't believe you remembered me saying that! oh, this is amazing.”
“open it.”
your head shoots up. “what? why?”
matty smiles. “just do it, please.”
“alright,” you do as requested. when you see what’s on the title page, your jaw drops. “matthew…”
“oh, shit, the full name. am i in trouble?” matty quips, smirking as he takes another sip of champagne.
“no, no, just… you got zadie fucking smith to sign a book for me? with a personal message?” you all but sob, lip quivering, completely overcome. “she's telling me she loves my work? what the fuck?”
“well, she's got good taste.”
“matty,” you wail. “this is the best gift i've ever been given.”
matty giggles. “no it isn't.”
“i'm telling you, it really is.”
“nah,” matty gently tugs the book from your hands and replaces it with the box. “this might be, though. but you need to stop crying before you open it, though, darling. can i just…?”
tenderly, so tenderly, matty takes your face in his hands and uses his thumbs to carefully wipe the tears pooling on your lower lashline. at his touch alone, your breathing starts to regulate; the same can't be said for your heart or brain, which both go haywire at the intimacy of his actions, something not helped by him whispering reassuringly to you. “there you are, darling. you're alright.”
it's not a question, but you nod anyway. “thank you.”
“anytime,” matty lets go of your face and sits back; you miss him as soon as he lets go. “right. now you can open it.”
with a smile, you lift the lid from the box - it falters, though, as soon as you take in the words on the paper in front of you. “these are outlines.”
“yeah, they are. look closer, darling.”
you squint at the paper, a choked noise escaping your lips. “feel free… fuck off. zadie gave you her essay notes?!”
“she did. and told me to give them to you.”
“how?”
“well,” matty grins, shuffling in his seat. “i went to see her and nick while i was in new york, and i asked her to sign the book while i was there. when she found out it was for you… she insisted you have those. printed more off for me and everything. she thinks you're the shit, darling.”
“you're sure she didn't say i was shit?” you hiccup, sliding the box onto the table before your tears hit the paper and picking up your glass for a long drink.
“positive. she only had lovely things to say about you,” matty takes your glass and refills it, beaming at you. “so, yeah. bit of a weird present, i know, but i knew you'd appreciate it.”
you laugh through your tears, wiping your eyes and shuffling your chair next to matty's to hug him. “i really do. and i appreciate you even more. thank you, lovely, you're too good to me.”
“nah, you deserve the best, darling,” matty’s hand comes up to rest on the back of your hair, stroking it gently.
you wallow in the tender moment for a second, before pulling back to smile at him. “m'sorry for crying, christ.”
he shakes his head. “don't worry about it, s'cute. and you still look fit when you cry, so…”
“shut up,” you laugh, shoving his shoulder.
“really, you look perfect,” matty smiles, eyes soft. “m'glad you came over early today. not just because it means we get the good potatoes, but because we get to do this, have a bit of peace before everyone gets here. s'nice. really nice.”
you nod. “it is. thanks for having me. and for the gift.”
he kisses your hand. “anytime. thank you for my gift. and just for being you, i s'pose.”
“it's like you want me to keep crying.”
“well, like i said, you look fit,” matty grins. “but nah, i'll stop. let's have a nice time and get rid of this champagne before everyone else gets here, yeah?”
“sounds like a plan.”
so that's what you do - sit at matty's kitchen table, drinking champagne and watching mayhem playing with his new toy, talking and laughing with your best friend. outside, the snow falls faster and faster, blanketing the garden in pristine white, but it's falling nowhere near as quickly as you are for matty. when the front door goes, you’re actually welcome for the excuse to leave the table, the kitchen, the intense care in those beautiful eyes that threatens to shatter your sanity and perspective.
it's your newly engaged friends, laden with more champagne and christmas crackers. once you've exchanged pleasantries, your friend sends her fiancé into the kitchen with the bags so she can interrogate you. “now why are you here so early? you're a little bit unsteady on your feet… oh my god, did you and matty fuck?”
“no! christ! and keep your fucking voice down,” you hiss, looking back down the hall to make sure the coast is clear. “i came over early to help with dinner. and we opened champagne. that's it.”
her eyes narrow. “but you want to fuck him, don't you?”
you open your mouth to answer, but pause for a split-second too long; she cuts back in again. “oh, you do! well, you should.”
“i don't just want to fuck him, babe,” you sigh, leaning against the cold concrete wall. your brain is screaming at you to shut up, but you can't. “i… like him. in a more-than-platonic way. like in a deep way.”
“so… tell him that.”
you blanch. “today?”
“yes! it's christmas. we've all seen love actually - it's the perfect time!” she quietly claps, beaming. “and you won't see him again until my birthday dinner, so if the revelation goes tits up… you've got two months to get over it.”
“really filling me with confidence here.”
“sorry,” she kisses your cheek. “i just like the thought of the two of you being happy, that's all.”
“i know, it's just-”
“darling?” matty wanders down the hall to you, pulling your friend into a welcoming hug, then turning to face you. “sorry to interrupt, but your timer is going off.”
“oh, thanks, lovely,” you smile at him. “be in in a minute, yeah?”
“alright. looking forward to it,” with a wink, he's gone again.
your friend smiles at him, then turns to you. “he is looking forward to you returning to the same room as him. how interesting!”
“yeah, because it means we all get the roast potatoes i made. that's it.”
“oh, you made those again? amazing,” she nods appreciatively, then looks at you and tilts her head. “he could still just be looking forward to being in close proximity to you again, though. wonder if there's any mistletoe around.”
“shut up, please, i am literally begging.”
she laughs, tucking you under her arm and walking to the kitchen. “alright, i'll leave it be tonight. but i'm just saying - i think you have to seriously consider that matty might want you under his christmas tree this month just as much as you want him under yours.”
“and i think you have to seriously consider that you might be delusional.”
“well, we'll soon find out, i'm sure.”
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jilytoberfest · 1 month ago
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The Jily Express starts boarding in 1 Day!
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All Aboard The JilyExpress! 🚂
It's almost October, and that means Jilytober is right around the corner! We're making some slight modifications to the JilyExpress from last year—this year, it's all in the Jilytober Discord, so you'll need to join to participate (you can do so by sending an ask to the JilytoberFest Tumblr account for a link).
What is the JilyExpress?
The JilyExpress is a collaborative fic writing event, also sometimes known as a round-robin writing event.
How does the JilyExpress work?
In the Jilytober Discord, we will have two simultaneous JilyExpress threads going- a General thread, and (if there's interest) an M rated thread.
On October first, a mod will start the threads with a message no longer than 3 sentences. From there, anyone can jump in and add onto the story, 3 sentences at a time.
There is no length of time to wait to post another addition onto someone else's continuation of the story once it gets going, we only ask that you let 2 other people post after you before you take another turn.
We'll keep the threads going all month long!
The JilyExpress is open to anyone! Writers, readers, artists—if you want to try your hand at writing in a very low-stakes (potentially high chaos) environment, then board the JilyExpress!
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those70scomics · 3 months ago
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Hi hi hi!
So, since you watched the show as it was airing I wanted to ask if Hyde and Jackie were always intended to become a ship and if they were, how do you know? Also, how do you know the original intention was for them to get engaged at the end of season 7, before it was renewed? (Outside from the obvious) I'm so curious
Hi! 😊
I'll start with how I know what I know. The T7S message board at Fan Forum was created very shortly after T7S began airing. When I became co-moderator of the board (less than ten years ago? Around ten?), I read every single post. Including those that were lost in what was called "the purge" by using the Internet Wayback Machine when Fan Forum was called Forum 4 Fans. These are the earliest posts one can find about the show.
This effort took me weeks. I read tens upon tens of thousands of posts and T7S / T7S fandom history. Followed links to defunct T7S fansites (again, the Internet Wayback Machine). This includes reading articles and transcripts of interviews with the cast, producers, writers, and showrunners. Press releases. News about cast negotiations.
Within these posts and fansites are people who went to tapings and wrote thorough reports. People who spoke to producers at tapings. People who (were) connected to people who worked on the show. Wilmer Valderrama posted himself in the board and interacted with fans. Remember, this forum existed before Twitter/X, before Facebook, before Tumblr. These forums were where social media started.
This was also the time of Myspace, and some of the cast posted there, too, which was reported on the message board.
As I found all the info through my research, I posted it in fresh threads on the message board. I also inherited my grandfather's eiditic memory and have partial highly superior autobiographical memory -- which is, thankfully, nowhere near Marilu Henner's complete HSAM. Of course, if I place a pen down and I'm distracted, I'll forget where I put the pen a second later 😂.
Facts stick in my head. Once I know it, I remember it. For example, I used to recite one of my college classes from start to finish to my friends (those who were interested). I've forgotten half the class by now. I learned how to let go of certain info so it wouldn't drive me 🤪. But not autobiographical memories. Those I re-experience like I'm watching a movie but with all thoughts and feelings attached. It's a visceral trip. A blessing and sometimes not so much. 😅
Anyway, there's the how.
Jackie and Hyde weren't always intended to endgame. The Filgos were writers on the show a few years before they were chosen as showrunners. During Jackie and Hyde's season 2-3 arc, the Filgos became enamored of the chemistry between the characters.
When the Filgos were chosen sometimes during season 4 to be the showrunners moving ahead (season 5 through the original end of the show, season 7), they asked the current showrunners to break up Jackie and Kelso by the end of season 4 because they wanted to pair Jackie and Hyde in season 5.
In the second half of season 4, one can see the change in Jackie and Kelso's relationship. It grows more and more toxic, a turn from their previous growth away from their original toxicity. It's written in stages rather than a sudden shift, so it's grounded in story and character.
From season 5, Jackie and Hyde were intended to be endgame. During the press for season 7 before it aired, the cast made clear this was the final season.
The Filgos were contracted through season 7. They got their next job since T7S was ending. Topher was moving into his movie career fully. The scripts, including the series finale, were written. Shows were filmed and began to air
Then Fox decides to renew the show (safer to continue a popular series than to risk $$$ on a new show). But the Filgos already had a new job lined up. They couldn't break that contract. They hoped whoever was hired after them would follow through on their vision for the show and reasonably expected the new showrunners to respect the past seven years of character a d relationship development.
But the showrunners hired were a) probably cheaper to pay because this was their first showrunning gig and b) presented their vision for season 8, which was to "bring it back to the humor and feel of season 1" -- the only season they liked, clearly, but didn't watch very carefully or with any depth of understanding.
W.V. also had in his contract changes for his character, including him ending up with one of the principal female characters. It wasn't going to be Donna, obviously, so that left Jackie. Not a problem for the S8 showrunners who hated J/H and, very evidently, Jackie as a character.
So instead of following through on the storyline the Filgos left them (i.e. reconcile fan-favorite couple Jackie and Hyde for good) to ease them into the role, they destroyed Jackie and Hyde's relationship because [partially direct quotation, partially close paraphrase from a magazine interview published before season 8 aired], "We never understood it. We never liked it. We think it was a mistake for the show to pair them romantically, so we're returning them to their season 1 dynamic. They were originally antagonists, and they should have stayed that way. That's where the humor is."
Fortunately, frustratingly, and sadly, someone connected to the show revealed Jackie's endgame from the original series finale, the original season 7 finale: Hyde proposes to Jackie, and they get engaged. Their season 7 arc is built around this endgame. Despite the script revisions and rewrites made when season 8 was greenlit, their original endgame remains evident throughout the second half of season 7.
Hyde tells Eric peacefully and happily (for Hyde) that he's decided [to marry Jackie]. Jackie would have actually left for Chicago, leaving Hyde the note he reads shortly after his decision. Kelso was not involved. But the rewrite, I believe, changed Jackie to having pretended to leave. It's messy writing, but it sets up that Kelso must now drive Jackie to Chicago. He's in her motel room, etc.
The original scripts likely have Jackie go to Chicago before the deadline she set for the ultimatum. Hyde is naturally upset and angry because he'd decided within her deadline to propose, but she deprived him of the chance after forcing the choice.
Hyde's conversation with Eric and Donna about his feelings (in Hyde's way) was probably in the original script. Donna calls out Hyde, realizing he was going to propose. Later, Eric tells Hyde he recognizes that Hyde became happy once he and Jackie got together.
All of the above is easily discernable. The following is conjecture based on the facts, foreshadowing, the Filgos' intended endgame for Jackie and Hyde, and my education and experience as a writer.
These conversations lead Hyde to break out of his misery and go to Chicago (with a ring) and follow-through with the proposal -- a huge character moment for him. He's going to fight for Jackie even if she ultimately rejects him (a parallel to "Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You" in season 5, where Jackie professes her love and doesn't care if Hyde says it back).
Hyde would have knocked on Jackie's motel door. She would've been shocked and asked Hyde what he's doing there. He would have entered and gotten on one knee. The audience would have squealed. Hyde would have proposed in a way true to himself -- not sentimentally but touching nonetheless.
She'd be in shock. "I can't believe you came to Chicago ... "
Hyde says his knee is starting to hurt, so she better make up her mind before he's forced to stand up.
Jackie: "Yes! Steven, yes, I'll marry you!"
Hyde blows out a heavy breath in all kinds of relief, stands up, and puts the ring on Jackie's finger. Jackie and Hyde kiss and embrace. Then Jackie examines the ring and is surprised he didn't go on the cheap like Eric.
Hyde: "Yeah, well, I asked W.B. for help."
Jackie: "But you hate hand-outs!"
Hyde: "It's not a hand-out! It's a loan. I'm gonna pay him back."
Jackie stares at Hyde lovingly.
Hyde: "What?"
Jackie: "This is our first fight as fiancés!"
Hyde laughs quietly then kisses Jackie again.
Fade out.
Other scenes to finish off the series, including the reveal to Jackie and Hyde's friends and family about their engagement.
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clockwork-ashes · 7 months ago
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All You Have Is Your Fire - Part IX
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Find Part I here :)
Summary: 'I can hear your heart beating through the stone.' For the briefest of moments, Lucien wondered if his mate would know exactly when his heart’s steady rhythm came to a sudden stop.
Note: A huge, huge thank you to the lovely @bettdraws who literally deserves all the credit and whose post inspired me to start writing this. I could not stop thinking about this headcanon, and it was so kind of you to let me try and make a story from it :)
And a HUGE thank you to everyone reading! ALSO please look at this post, I gasped it's so lovely. All of @teddyhoneybear's moodboards are stunning <3
Tag List: @anishake / @nocasdatsgay / @mybestfriendmademe / @talibunny30 / @halfbutneverwhole / @wishfulimaginings / @goldenmagnolias / @emmers-bens123 /
Part X >>
Lucien walked beside Elain as he continued to lead them towards the loveliest library in the Forest House. She was so unusually close that the stone hallway felt too small, the walls closing in around him. If he wished, he could have brushed the fingers of his hand against her knuckles. 
Lucien tried not to glance at his mate, but failed rather miserably. He could see Elain’s pretty brown eyes taking in her surroundings carefully, trying to track where they were going. Lucien knew from experience that it would take Elain and Cora both some time before the two females grew accustomed to the sprawling complex, a city in its own right. 
Cora walked silently on the stones just a bit behind them and Lucien wondered briefly what kind of shoes she was hiding beneath her long skirts. Her steps were noiseless, like she was floating, almost as though Lucien and Elain were alone. 
Perhaps involuntarily, Elain moved even closer to him. Lucien nearly offered her his arm, but thought better of it. He did not think she would appreciate it, but Lucien could still feel the phantom grip of her hand on his own as they had been escorted to their shared suite the night before. 
Thoughtlessly, Lucien had left her alone when he had woken up, and while he was sure Eris had slightly exaggerated Elain’s words, he knew that Elain did not like the fact that he had declined to tell her where he planned to go.  
Through their bond, Lucien could feel her frustration with him over it, a slow thrum over that bridge between two souls. It had come as a shock to Lucien when Elain had agreed to go to the library, even with her lady’s maid joining. 
Elain was clearly uneasy with their current predicament, and Lucien could not even blame her. 
“The Autumn Court is lovely,” Elain politely offered in the quiet. She did not look towards him, keeping her gaze steady and ahead.
Lucien nodded in response. The court he had been raised in was genuinely beautiful, stunning, especially for someone who had never visited before. Lucien did not mention how cruel of a place it could be. “I always thought so.” 
Lucien said nothing more, unsure if Elain was truly looking for a conversation to start between them, or if she simply wanted the awkward silence that had befallen to end. 
Lucien ran a hand through his hair, the gesture a nervous habit. He caught as Elain seemingly stopped breathing, her heartbeat racing. 
With a furrowed brow, Lucien looked at her, hesitating to ask if she was alright. 
Much to Lucien’s relief, Cora spoke before he did. With hurried steps, she caught up to Elain, hardly worried. “Forgive me, but if I might speak out of turn,” her voice carried in the hall, her accent thick with the rhythm of the Hewn City. 
“That’s nonsense,” Elain mumbled, her shoulders relaxing. 
Lucien felt his lips turn up, the smallest of smiles at how Elain did not even consider that Cora was technically working for the Night Court. He could hear the way Cora’s tone changed immediately, suddenly more comfortable. 
“How does anyone manage to get around this place?” She made a careless gesture with her hand, the golden thread along her sleeve flashing. “All of it looks the same,” she addressed him with a dark brow raised. 
Lucien noticed for the first time how lovely she was, his focus almost always having been entirely on Elain since the moment he had seen his mate in his father’s throne room. Cora’s jaw was sharp, her lips full, an elegant bump just on the bridge of her nose. Her dark brows framed even darker eyes, a blush staining her high cheekbones when Lucien faced her fully.   
“You get used to it,” he responded warmly. “It takes some time, but I’m sure you’ll find your way around easily enough by the week’s end.” 
“Callum Vanserra escorted me to the servant’s quarters yesterday.” Cora tucked a long strand of hair behind her pointed ear. Lucien took note of how she did not add a title to his brother’s name and he liked her boldness, her blatant disregard for another court’s prince. “I think he led me past the library, but I can’t tell if we even walked by here,” she added with a nervous laugh. 
Lucien offered Cora a genuine smile. “Remind me, then, to take you to your room before Elain and I return to ours.” 
“Callum is your older brother?” Elain’s question caught Lucien by surprise, a knowing smile flashed along Cora’s lips as the other female turned away from him. 
Elain cleared her throat awkwardly, as if asking the question had caught her by surprise as well. Lucien could feel a small burst of possessiveness flashing along the bond, the way Elain urged him to pay attention to her with a tug on that invisible string.  
Jealousy. 
“Callum is third-born, practically ancient.” Lucien looked to see how Elain would react. Her eyes were wide with curiosity, the weight of her full regard too heavy for him. An amazing actress, she hid her emotions so well, Lucien thought. He faced away from Elain once more. “He was a child during the first war, and was raised in Xian, by my maternal grandmother.” 
Elain nodded along, interest lining her expression. Lucien could see her from the corner of his eye and decided that was much better, her beauty easier to bear. Like looking straight at the sun, painful and yet the desire was there. 
“Will you tell me about the others?” Elain asked, looking up at him, her steps in time with his own. 
Lucien shrugged, he hated all his brothers in equal measure. “There’s not much to tell.” He felt another pull on the bond and could not help facing his mate.
“I should probably know more about your family,” he watched as a scarlet blush bloomed on Elain’s pale cheeks. “We are getting married, after all.” 
A genuine laugh spilled from Lucien’s lips at her tone. “I suppose you’re right.”
“It happens on occasion,” she clipped, her blush deepening in colour. 
Lucien tore his gaze from Elain for a moment to flash Cora a concerned look, wondering whether he should speak in front of the other female about his brothers. His golden eye whirred. 
“I won’t repeat a word of this to anyone,” Cora rushed to reassure him, noticing the way Lucien glanced at her. “My lips are completely sealed.” 
Lucien ran his hand through his hair, sighing. He decided it hardly mattered what Elain’s lady’s maid knew in regards to his family. He turned his attention back to Elain, only to find her looking at him intently. “You haven’t met Felix, but he’s only a few years older than me.”
“You were close with him.” Elain’s statement suggested that was the only logical conclusion in her mind. 
“Not at all,” Lucien scoffed. “He only ever looks out for himself, silver-tongued, a perfect emissary. Felix can convince the most stubborn of nobles to see his point of view, sway their opinions in his favour.” 
Elain hummed in understanding, but Lucien still did not think she could completely grasp the twisted relationship he had with his brothers. 
“Felix is on good terms with Ronan, I think.” Lucien could never be too sure where the loyalty of each Autumn prince lay, or how quickly they might turn on one another if the right circumstances were to arise. “Ronan works closely with my father, his flames strong enough to make him a worthy contender for the crown.” He frowned as Elain silently coaxed him to go on with only her eyes. “Like I said, there’s not much to tell.” 
Lucien continued walking, the library’s carved wooden doors only a few steps away. He did not need to raise his hand to open them, despite how heavy they were, glad that they were still unlocked and open to anyone who wished to enter.
“And Eris?” Elain asked, her brows raised. Surely she had heard about his eldest brother’s reputation, Lucien thought, but he was the only one of his brother’s Elain had truly interacted with. It made sense that Elain would want to know more.  
Lucien almost stopped in his tracks as he considered her question. “Eris is…” 
A snake. 
The male who raised me. 
My favourite brother. 
“Eris is Eris,” he said with a shrug, the gesture and his statement so ridiculous he winced. With his eldest brother, everything was achingly more complicated. “The best and worst of Autumn, sure to be my father’s heir.” 
“When you scowl, you look like him.” Elain’s statement was a throwaway, hardly considered, but Lucien frowned. He slowed his steps so that she could walk past him and into the library, Cora still at her side. 
Lucien followed after them just in time to catch Elain marvelling at the sight before her. 
There were countless towering shelves pushed against the walls and in neat rows all around the large room. The golden spines of some of the rarer books glimmered in the light of the torches, all of them carefully spelled by librarians and priestesses against catching alight. Lucien knew that these were some of the only books in all of Prythian that remained untouched after Amarantha’s reign, and he felt a strange sense of pride for it. 
In the middle of the library, between a pair of shelves, stood the remains of a hollowed tree. The leafless branches seemed to hold up the ceiling, the gnarled trunk shaped in a way that resembled a fireplace. Thick roots created nooks near the trunk, perfect for private reading, before they disappeared like waves on a beach beneath the stone of the floor.  
Lucien waved his hand and flames came to life in the emptied space of the ancient maple. 
Wonder shone bright as sunlight in Elain’s eyes as she turned to Lucien, all sincerity. “I’ve never seen anything like this,” she breathed. 
Lucien smiled at the sight, the way her walls had come down. “Some say that this library rivals even the ones in the Day Court.”  
“I can imagine how that might be the case,” Elain shyly smiled, shaking her head as she walked deeper into the room. 
Lucien watched as Elain reached out, careful fingers tracing the leather bound books on the shelf nearest to her. Brown eyes skimmed the titles of each one, she bit her lower lip as she went on the tips of her toes, peeking at some of the scrolls on a higher row. 
Lucien felt like he was intruding. 
He tried to turn his attention to Cora, but the Night Court female had silently scurried away, leaving Lucien and Elain alone. Lucien decided that Cora was perhaps a meddlesome busybody before he simply followed Elain further into the library. 
Elain pulled a scarlet book off the shelf, the pages yellowed with the passage of time. Lucien raised both his brows as he stood behind her, as he read the looping script on the cover. 
A Complete History of Autumn’s Blood Duels. 
“Looking for some light reading?” 
Elain did not look at Lucien as she flipped through the book, lifting her shoulders in an elegant shrug. “I’ve heard the term once, just curious.” 
“It’s probably full of some very gruesome details,” he warmed. A memory flashed in Lucien’s mind, one from his childhood. He had stolen a similar tome off Callum’s nightstand as a boy, and had had to sleep on the armchair in Eris’s room for days as a result. 
“I’m sure I can handle it.” 
Lucien recognized that there was a bite to Elain’s words, as though she was not simply speaking about the book in her hands. It was a hidden anger, a crack in her ever so carefully crafted mask. All her pleasant smiles, all her words dripping with honeyed falsehoods were no longer directed at Lucien, and he was surprised to realise that he was glad for it. 
“Of that, I have no doubt,” Lucien offered quietly, hoping Elain understood the full meaning behind his response.
Elain’s head snapped up quickly as she turned to look up at him, their eyes locking. The full force of the mating bond was a knife to his chest as her scent washed over him, sweet like blooming jasmine. 
Lucien wondered if Elain felt the same overwhelming pull as her eyes darkened a shade, as she leaned closer only to breathe in deeply. 
Their hearts were beating steadily in a matching rhythm, and Lucien forced himself to take a step back. 
Like a curse shattering, Elain whirled on her heel faerie-quick, holding the book tightly against her chest. 
As though nothing had occurred, Elain went back to focusing solely on the books on the shelves in front of her. Lucien watched her for a moment, before he too turned his attention to a different shelf. 
With a weary sigh, Lucien concluded that if he and Elain could survive their time in Autumn, he would suffer the most torturous two weeks of his immortal life.
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genericpuff · 1 year ago
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Turns out it's been a while since I've talked about Rachel's medical fetish art so it came as a shock to people when I mentioned it in the last post (I've got quite a few asks about it lmao) So I'm gonna enlighten y'all real quick on what I'm referring to, and yes, it's probably exactly what you're thinking of when you hear the word 'medical fetish'.
CONTENT WARNING: DISCUSSION OF MEDICAL FETISH ART AND DEPICTIONS OF NEEDLES!!!!
So the name "used_bandaid" is one Rachel started using back in the early to mid 2000's. She went by a LOT of different pennames back then, including but probably not limited to:
Pepper_maid
madame_issue
Usedbandaid/used_bandaid
Rach Alex
Rachel Royale
Raquel
Medical Tophat/Medical_Tophat
Frill_house
Gingerbreadcoffin (? this one's kinda weird because the link itself with this username just goes back to her used bandaid MySpace account , so idk if she ever actually used it or if it was even affiliated with her lol)
Now you're probably about to ask, "Puff, how do you know these are all her?" and that's because Rachel still had all of these accounts interlinked through her projects, primarily The Doctor Pepper Show. She seemed to change up usernames often just for the hell of it.
Anyways. I'm not gonna show much of it here because I do think it's better to leave certain things in the past, but there's a LOT of her old work that implies the stuff that's questionable/problematic in LO has always been a part of her identity as an artist (DDLG, hot pink self-insert MC, etc.)
One such example is "madame issue":
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This is such a 3-in-1 smoking gun for everything we see in LO. The reference to bandaids (see: used bandaid, which was part of her URL slug for her old flickr where this drawing comes from), the hot pink color palette, and of course, the fact that this character is almost DEFINITELY a self-insert of Rachel, thanks to that shared name.
She's also stated in old commission/print posts that Madame Issue was the one print she wouldn't sell.
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She doesn't explicitly say why but I think it's pretty safe to assume it's because Madame Issue is her.
We also have Eva, "the queen of medical fetish". And the tags are... pretty self-explanatory.
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That said, that's as much as I'm gonna go into with her old art, because a lot of it does get quite personal with her and I don't really think it accomplishes much more to continue digging up old skeletons, at least not unless they can be seen as parallel to LO (which some of them are and I'll likely be sharing more of those ones in a later post).
That said, there ARE still pages that are accessible without the use of the Wayback Machine that advertise her as a medical fetish artist without the need for extensive digging. If you search up The Doctor Pepper Show on Google, you'll actually find a reddit thread asking what happened to Rachel's old work, and there are comments with loads of resources to access her pre-LO content. You'll also find the listing for The Doctor Pepper Show on The Webcomic List, which literally describes it as a medical fetish comic: "This is a comic set in a world where evil doctors rule, girls wear frilly underpants and people use their manners. *May I please blow your f**king head off?* This comic features Gothic dandys, EGL (Gothic lolitas) and medical fetish fashion. (Neo victorian setting)"
I'll let y'all do your own digging from here, there's a LOT to unpack honestly and while I can't keep you from doing your own research, practice due diligence with what you choose to share. Again, I don't think it's a crime in and of itself for Rachel to want to distance herself from her past as a medical fetish artist, so I think it's only really relevant to show the things that are clearly still influencing LO (like her love for the movie Lolita or the very clear sexualization of youthfulness). While we can try to leave the past where it is, she does still write LO with a lot of the most problematic features of her former identity, and it makes it all the more bizarre that if she is trying to distance herself from it all, then why would she stick with one of the pennames that's the most easily tied back to medical fetishism?
TL ; DR: Rachel started off online with medical fetish and gothic lolita art (at least as far back as we can trace it) and elements of that past are still present in LO today. Use that info responsibly lol
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