#you better not touch those eggs

[lusi-raul]

I want the eggs back so bad but since Philza hinted that the eggs disappeared because the admins are on vacation, if that is true I guess I can wait a little longer. The admins deserve all the rest they can get. They must be tired from carrying the qsmp on their backs lol. Not to say that I watch qsmp just for the eggs I originally watched because of slime and Jaiden but fell in love with Philza lol but you gotta admit that qsmp is not the same without them. And not just the egg admins, all the other admins from the twitter updates to the admins who do everything in the background to make qsmp the best experience for both viewers and cc’s. If what Philza said was true, then you savor that vacation, admins. Thank you for your hard work just to entertain us all ❤️

[on-the-clear-blue]

Dead Man's Diner pt 2

Danny had to admit, Lunch Lady was an excellent teacher.

Sure they were blitzing though a cook book thst was more tape and hope the paper, but Danny was for once actually understanding and enjoying being taught.

Cracking an egg into a bowl, Danny held it close while whisking quickly, not fully incorporating the flour in his pancake batter before dumping a good sized dollop on the flat top, smiling from the brief sizzle that he heard.

There was a sudden cacophony sounds from the front of house (which was the dining area? He never knew that before) putting the flat top on low, Danny looked over to where Lunch Lady was floating only to find nothing.

Blinking a bit, Danny wiped his hands off OK his apron as he poked his head out, frowning at the diner car, "What was that..." his words were cut off by one of the blinds slats bending as if pried open, and as he squinted, Danny saw two figures watching from a distance ontop another rail car.

Vigilantes

Danny felt his heart flutter with excitement, while not as cool as maybe Martian Manhunter or StarFire (since y'know...fucking aliens, Space) the Gotham caped community were interesting, if only since Batman and his Flock were Sam's low key obsession, she had even gone out as Robin for multiple Halloweens, and don't even get him started on the fan theories about them all.

Smirking he tapped the bar, allowing thr blinds to snap closed, "Sam is so going to flip that I saw the Birds before her." Letting out a little giggled, Danny quickly swore as he smelt a bit of burning and rushed to flip his pancakes.

---

Tim was, in Dicks opinion, the most concerning member of the family, sure most days he gives of "miserable wet cat" energy but even then Dick had seen his little brother easily take down guys that even Bruce had trouble with.

That wasnt even touching on his um...mental quirks

The less he speaks of the time period between Bruce's and Kons deaths till their eventual return, the better.

Putting down the binoculars, Dick stole a glance over at Red Robin, who was frowning deeply at his wrist computer, scooting a little closer Dick leaned over to see what was happening, "Whatcha do~oing?"

So entranced by what he was reading Tim jumped a little, an elbow flying out to where Dicks face had been a second ago as he turned and glared.

"Don't...! Do that Wing! Ugh..." shaking his head as he let out a huff Tim took his eyes off the small monitor and looked up at the diner car, pointing at it as he spoke scornfuly.

"That place does not exist."

"Like, legally? I am sure Batburger doesn't either-"

"No." Tim said, cutting the older vigilante off, "It doesn't exist physically."

"Timmy..." Dick said as he ran through the protocols for when RedRobin got a little too many insane things in his head.

"Get that look off your face Wing, it really doesn't exist, like..." letting out a sigh, the teen tried to put his words right "Don't look straight at it but a bit to the side so it's to the side of your eye." Pointing to a middle distance a bit away from the diner cart, Dick sent a small frown at his brother but did as he was asked.

"Holy leaping lizards..." Tim, somehow, was right, since when Dick just looked about a few feet away from the diner, it started to waver turning...transparent? And a little blue? But when he looked at it closer it was just a normal, abet run down looking diner.

"Exactly, no need to bench me till Agent A stuffs me full of anti-psychotics!"

"That was one time Tim, and you were having a mental break down."

"I am not lying when I say we killed Santa Claus Dick!"

"Sure Tim...sure"

---

Danny drummed his fingers on the breakfast bar, nursing a cup of coffee as he waited for something to happen.

He knew thst he was being watched, he had a vague idea who was doing the watching, but was starting to get a bit bored waiting for them to get closer.

Pausing mid sip, a grin spread across Danny's lips, "Hey cart? Can you do something that might draw those guys over here? Let's get some customers!"

Some how, Danny's grin only grew at the rumble of the cart, and he xould hav sworn he heard a sound that was a mix between a train horn and a chuckle.

---

Tim shot his brother a stinging glare, swatting at his arm as he blushed, he did every much indeed accidentally killed Santa Claus and took an impromptu trip to Apokolips to give DarkSeid coal.

His next rebuttal to Nightwing was cut off as the diner cart shuddered as if it was in an earthquake before it stilled, and the banner that was across it suddenly gained a new line.

[JUST NOW! VIGILANTES AND HEROS GET ONE FREE SIDE OF FRIES! COME ON IN BEFORE THE OFFER ENDS!]

Tim was silent for a moment, watching the cart to see if there was any more changes before turning to Dick, who had lost the joyful energy that he always seemed to have.

"RR, plans changed, we are going to investigate inside."

Tim gave a sharp nod, his bo staff elongating as he grappled down to the train tracks below, his boots crunching gravel underfoot as he slipped from shadow to shadow, getting closer to Big C's diner.

---

Danny was in the back, flipping through his cook book as he heard a bell ring, jolting up, Danny could see through the service window and see who came in.

He had never met a real hero before, not like the two that had just came in, feeling nervous, Danny fumbled with a small notebook as he came out from the kitchen, grinning at the two Birds.

"Heya! Thanks for coming to Big C's! Names Danny and I am kinda the only one in today, what can I get you both?"

His eyes flickered between the two vigilantes, noticing new things each time he looked at them, like how Red Robin's cape had buttons instead of being sown on, or how Nightwings suit wasn't slick but actually textured.

---

Dick looked at everything he could as he stood in the diners door, it looked like a typical 50s styled mom and pop kinda place, an old radio buzzed with songs of a bygone era while the seats were cracked pink leather vinyl.

He could hear someone moving in the back, resting a hand on his eskrima sticks, Dick stalked further in, it felt real enough...

He could feel Red Robin knock into his back as the person from the back came into view, it was a teen, and holy hell did he look like Bruce Wayne adoption bait, raven hair, blue eyes and a cheesy looking grin.

He couldn't be older than Damian, who had turned 16 a few months ago, the teen was just so...tiny.

Danny, that's the name given to them, and Dick can see it, he looked like a Danny.

Pausing to look to Tim, Dick smiled back at the teen, "Well...can we see a menu?"

[deepestnightcolor]

Oml I love your writing, I just binged all the Sam fics! I saw you take requests for Harvey 👀 any chance for a “confidential check up?”

Hello, dear anon!~ Thank you so much for both the compliment and request. This was my first time writing a full-blown Harvey fic - and I hope I did suffice :D

Thanks for your request, and thank you so much for your time and love! <3

ᴀ/ɴ: as I said, this is my first time writing a Harvey fic and I am still sick, so I hope it will suffice!!

PS: I hid two Easter eggs this time. >:)

PPS: maybe 2,5, one being a slight nod at @sashiavi >:))

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: Harvey (SDV) x Fem!eader

ᴡᴄ: 4194 words

ᴍᴅɴɪ ✧ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: medical misconduct, unprotected sex, light nipple play, seductive reader, Harvey's a little insecure.

☾ ᴅᴏᴄᴛᴏʀ, ᴅᴏᴄᴛᴏʀ, ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴀ ʀᴇᴍᴇᴅʏ ☽

A secret that you'd never share? Simple and carnal, your secret was. Primitive, even. You had only made the appointment with Doctor Harvey to finally wrap the man around your finger.

You had tried it fair and square at first, you seriously had! Coming by whenever he had time, bringing him little gifts you were sure he'd like; trying to engage him in conversation.

However, Harvey always seemed so busy, so professional. Telling you to take care and stay healthy and giving you advice on how you achieve just that. Always looking out for you, always gentle in his words and behavior. And by Yoba, it made you want to break him even more.

Also, what better way was there to implement your plan than to catch the little lamb where it felt the safest and most confident? Of course, it was a little unfair, pretending you needed his help and skills to treat an injury, but then again you did. Just not in the way Harvey would expect. He had loads of chances to get the hint, but nothing had worked. Not even when you had fished out the shortest skirt possible out of your closet and wore it with a top that left barely anything to one's imagination, accidentally falling on your knees right in front of Harvey, showing off those lace panties of yours. No, that hadn't worked either. Harvey had let out a gasp that made you believe you had finally done something to him, just to rush to your side and ask if you were okay. If you needed help, if you were dizzy. Fuck did you want to cry out that you were dizzy for him, his touch. Instead, you gave him a sweet smile, fluttering your lashes at him as you told him no, you were fine. But thank you so much, Harvey!

You had scrambled to your feet and made your way back to the farm with your head hanging, and that was the point you decided it would probably need to be all or nothing.

“So, what brings you here today? Maru only noted that you requested to see me. I hope you didn't hurt yourself?” Harvey asked, scooting closer on his rolling chair. You were already propped up on the table, smiling sweetly at Harvey.

You had picked out an excellent outfit for the day, if you were allowed to say so. A blouse that was easy to open up and discard, and a skirt that seemed modest enough yet was nothing but of the mere purpose of covering up your lack of panties. And you were hurting. Terribly so, even. For him.

“Nono, Doc. I just, you know. I've been feeling some kind of way. Under the weather, you might say.” You leaned forward a bit now, running your fingers through your hair before twirling a strand around your finger. You were met with a pair of green-brown eyes, so full of consideration and empathy. It made you want to just sit on his face and make him spill all of his care onto your sweet pussy until you could feel it in every part of your body.

“I see! And how does that show? Do you have a headache? Do you feel more tired than usual?”

So sweet and caring, Doctor Harvey. Too cute to not bite.

You let out a sigh as if you were contemplating, biting around on your lower lip. “No, that's not it. I don't know how to describe it, it's…embarrassing.”

The doctor looked up at you again, putting away his notepad now. He gave you a sweet, genuine smile. A hand landed on your shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"There’s absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. This is a safe, confidential space; nothing will leave these walls.”

Go on, little lamb. Step right into the trap.

You leaned back a bit, pushing out your chest now. “Well, it's my chest. It's been so…so tender lately.”

A hum. That's all you got. A hum. Or so you thought. Because if you looked closely, you could see more. His moustache was twitching as his eyes flickered down to your breasts. Harvey was a professional, though. He quickly cleared his throat, nodding at you.

“Alright, I will glad- I would be happy- let's take a look, shall we?”

It took a lot from you to not break out in a grin; having the man break out in a stutter like that? It definitely was a step forward.

“Yes, please.” You needed to pretend to be innocent now - you didn't want to scare him away, after all.

Your fingers were quick to unbutton your shirt and your upper body was already bare before the doctor could even properly turn back to you. For a moment, his motions seemingly stuttered to a halt, his hands still clasped together from rubbing the disinfectant on them.

His moustache twitched again as he approached you, taking a seat on the chair again.

“Alright, my hands might be a little cold from the disinfectant, but I should be quick.”

Fuck, you hoped that he wouldn't be. You gave him a nod and what you hoped to be a shy smile, pushing your chest towards him a little.

And then, finally…Fucking finally you felt tender fingers on the soft skin of your breasts. It left you breathless for a moment, helpless as he traced the curves of your tits so expertly.

The moan falling from your lips really wasn't an accident, but Harvey, dear sweet Harvey, decided to let you off the hook. Ever the gentleman, wasn't he?

“Did that hurt?” He asked, his eyes flickering up to you, gently squeezing the flesh again. This time you looked straight into his eyes as you moaned, licking your lips. “No, it just…tingles,” you grinned, eyes following Harvey's dropping hands with dismay. 

“Well, I did not find any lumps or irritations that could explain the tenderness. Did any lifestyle changes happen? Or perhaps a new medication?” 

Pretending to be thinking, you swung your legs back and forth. One of your feet got in contact with his shin, slowly tracing upwards only to slide down again.

The man’s face was stoic, eyes trained on your face with a stern look. 

Yet again, the twitching of his moustache betrayed him.

The thought that you hadn't responded yet reeled you in a little: “No…Well. Maybe kind of? You know…I've been having, well. Thoughts about someone. Thoughts about them touching me, wanting me,” you began, your foot wandering to his knee.

“Could that be it?”

A blush had spread on his cheeks now, and Yoba did you love to see it. He picked up the notepad and quickly jotted something down, then nodded.

“I assume that could be it-”

“And what do I do about it, Doctor? It hurts, after all.”

Immediately, his attention is  back on you completely. “Hurts? Where?”

A vague pointing to your body made Harvey's hand reach out, touching your stomach. “Here?”

You shook your head, letting your foot wander down again. “Lower.”

His brows furrowed now and he let his hand slide towards your abdomen. “Here? Are they cramps?”

Again, you shook your head.

“Lower.”

He was hesitating now, looking up at you with an uncertainty you had never seen before, and it felt like another small victory.

“Could you…uh. Point me to where it hurts?”

Click - the trap was snapping shut.

It didn't need many words; you opened up your legs without an ounce of hesitation, revealing your cunt, all wet and ready for the doctor. “There.”

Harvey swallowed thickly, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to find the words. Words that wouldn't have him lose his license. It wasn't like he hadn't seen genitals before - much more than one would expect from a small town like this - and he had never been affected. So why was his throat dry now? Why was his heart pounding like this?

“It's getting like this whenever I see handsome men like you, what could that be?”

“It’s getting like…what?” by now he was thankful that he was able to get some words out with his head feeling as light as it did right now.

“I dunno…wet?”

His eyes went straight back to your pussy, staring at it. You were wet. And you looked delicious. But he was a doctor. A professional. He had done so much to be where he was right now!

“Oh! That…uh. That…it- well. It stems from attraction. It's so..so sexual intercourse can happen more easily, you see. All natural. There's no need to worry at all.”

He was pulling back, this damn professional. Even though you could see that you were getting to him. “But…isn't there a remedy?”

Harvey wanted to just sink into the ground. His head still felt light, and he could feel his pants tighten - he had been mesmerized by you ever since you had introduced yourself. And of course, he had noticed your attempts to catch his attention - he wasn't stupid, after all. Yet Harvey had promised himself. Promised himself to not get too involved anymore. And now you were here. Exposed, and seemingly ready for him. So close but- he had to be strong. Be a doctor.

“Well, for one…You could do some self-care. Masturbation is quite healthy for the human body and mind.”

Like hell he'd recommend you to have sex with someone else, not even someone like him could be so professional. You called him handsome after all, for crying out loud!

“Oh! And…how does that work?” 

Your patience was running thin now, but you felt like you were so close to having him where you wanted him, despite him being so oblivious. His face was motionless now as he stared at you, Adam's apple bobbing up and down. He was obviously looking for words.

“I-”

“Come on, Doctor Harvey. You're supposed to help me, aren't you?” You cooed, interrupting the clouding thoughts before they could really rain on him.

“But- that is the thing. I am your Doctor-”

You didn't answer him right away, your hand wandering to your clit first, giving it a gentle flick.

“And what if you prescribed yourself to be my remedy? I think you're the only thing that can help me,” you moaned.

The groan coming from his direction certainly wasn't professional anymore. A hand, now warmer than before, settled on your thigh. “You said it hurts here?” 

Before you could look where his finger was pointing you could feel the pad of it trace through your wet folds. 

“Exactly,” you breathed, spreading your legs a little further. 

“I can't see much,” he murmured, his cock twitching painfully in his pants. “I'd need to clean you up first before I run some more tests...is that okay with you?”

The bobbing of your head was enough for Harvey to finally break down.

He leaned forward faster than he would have guessed from himself, his fingers spreading your folds, and by Yoba, you were wet. All the more reason to examine you closely, wasn’t it? Keeping you healthy wasn’t bad, after all. It was his job. And if that was what it took, he would oblige – for the sake of medicine, of course. Not because of his throbbing cock and the desperate need to taste you on his tongue; not because he was salivating from the thought alone.

His tongue slowly slipped out of his mouth, a sliver of hesitation lingering in the air. He could see your hole contract when you thought him close, he could see the shivers making the muscles of your thighs twitch whenever his hot breath hit the wetness of your cunt, and yet…wasn’t this wrong? Had he somehow taken advantage of you?

“Harvey, fuck, please?” A small rock of your hips followed your words. Urging him closer. He could smell you now, and holy life, did you smell good. Lured him right into taking a deep whiff, as if he didn’t know he would get drunk on you immediately. Yet he did know and he willingly took another deep inhale. The impatient whine above him caused his eyes to flicker up to your face. You looked down at him, your lower lip tugged between your sets of pearly whites. No words needed to be spoken, and yet Harvey still followed your order.

His tongue slowly slipped out of his mouth; eyes glued to your face. He wanted to see how you would react to that first contact, wanted to see if you felt as hot as he did right now. His pants were really straining against his aching erection, his zipper pressing against the shaft through his boxers. He was pretty sure those were wet too by now, with all the pre-cum he had been leaking. He finally pressed the muscle against your entrance, licking a flat, thick line upwards. And he took his time doing it; so much so that it had your toes curl and your thighs close in around his head. The brunet was quick to react, though, one hand holding your leg open, while the other busied itself with spreading open your pussy for his hungry tongue. His licking had become faster now, but precise enough to avoid your clit. He was, after all, only cleaning you up now, wasn’t he? Still, that didn’t mean that his hot tongue licking up whatever you gave him didn’t make you moan for him. How long had you been thinking about this? Having Harvey between your legs, in any which way he would have offered? Too long. And now he finally had his head buried between your thighs, licking and sucking you up like a starved man offered a meal after ages of going hungry. His tongue licked up and down, from one side to the other, but he still ignored your hardening clit with apparently the same professionalism he had ignored your advances before.

He gave your lips a light suck, then sunk his tongue deep inside of you. A groan left his glistening lips, eyes shut tight while he lapped at your walls eagerly, trying to get as much of you as possible into his mouth. “Harvey, oh fuck, right there,” you breathed, hand flying in his hair to hold onto the strands between your fingers tightly, giving a tug that was harder than you had intended it to be. But that only seemed to spur the male on more, his face burying deeper, tongue and lips working in unison now. And by Yoba, he had never tasted anything this good; so sweet, so…you; and you were addictive.

Your hips bucked upwards for him, if to grant him easier access or just because you couldn’t keep them down anymore, you didn’t know. You didn’t really care, either. Harvey’s moustache rubbed against you in a way that made your head spin, his lips sucking on you while he circled his tongue within you made your whole body tense. Even when pussy-drunk he seemed incredibly precise, knowing just where to brush past, when to suck and when to lick.

 You weren’t able to do much anymore, just hold onto his hair and wait for the sweet, sweet release to wash over you and in turn, Harvey’s tongue.

It was close; you could feel it in the ripple down your spine, in the way you clenched around him, you could feel it in the pit of your stomach, too. You were dangerously close to the edge, and one well-placed flick would push you over. You were ready for it; the string of moans that left your lips were dirty, raw, carrying all the words you couldn’t form anymore.

You awaited the feeling of your orgasm crashing over you, not to suddenly feel empty and cold after being engulfed in the warmth of his mouth. But Harvey was standing now, his face wet and his glasses fogged up from the heat that had reached the cool surface, and yet you knew that he was staring right at you. You opened your mouth, but you didn’t trust your vocal cords just yet, so all you did was letting out a confused hum, to which the brunet in front of you smiled.

“You are all clean now- I believe you are ready for further tests.”

Fuck, you were. More than that. By now, you really felt an ache in your body, and the only remedy was there, right in front of you, fumbling with the buttons of his pants. His hands were shaking, enough so for you to lean forward, popping the button open for him. The doctor let out an awkward laugh, moustache twitching from the embarrassed rumble that went through him. “Sorry,” he whispered but quickly switched gears when you pressed a kiss to his lips. The taste of you mixed with his spit made you whimper, the appetite for him only growing within you. You wanted to help him tug down his boxers as well, but instead of fabric, you were met with the soft skin that had been hidden beneath until now. Your throat went dry; you just had to pull away and look at him. He was big, tip coated in a layer of pre-cum, his shaft girthy.

“Harvey, please,” you stammered, leaning back on the table so he could lean over you more easily.

The brunet followed you like a well-behaved lamb, leaning in again to kiss you. You could feel the tip of his dick against your entrance, slowly pushing forward. The stretch the head of his penis caused made your eyes roll back, excitement for the rest of his girth stretching you bubbling inside of you.

Harvey, ever the gentleman, took it slow. Rutting inside of you, centimetre after centimetre, eyes fixed on your face for any signs of pain and discomfort. He brushed your hair to the side to whisper sweet nothings in your ear, telling you how good you felt, how wet you were for him, and holy Yoba, did he ever feel anything like this before?

You had to admit, at first, the stretch did hurt a little, but with both him being so tender with you, so gentle, the pain quickly turned into a cloud of lust and despair. You wanted him, and you weren’t afraid to show him anymore. “Harvey, oh, for fuck’s sake, fuck me.”

A twitch, and then a shove that made him bottom out inside of you. A groan from him bled into the moan that tore from you, but that didn’t make Harvey pause. Not anymore.

His thrusts were shaky, unsure at first. He was just so adorable, wasn’t he? His eyes searched yours as if to ask for approval, as if to make sure he was doing this right, and it made your heart swell within your chest.

“You are so good to me, Harv,” you whispered, shamelessly letting your moans slip for him. The brunet’s eyes lit up, and he pushed his hips forward faster, more eagerly now.

Smiling to yourself, you let your head lull back. Harvey’s dick felt so good within you, filling you out with clumsy thrusts that steadied the more confidence he felt. Your back arched in as the brunet found a rhythm that seemingly fitted both your tastes; fast strokes that reached deep within you. The little grunts that left his slightly swollen hips only added fuel to the fire, only made you want him more.

Your legs hooked around his soft hips as he fucked into you with quick thrusts, body working with him to get him to go harder, more ruthless. Lucky for you, Harvey was a quick learner. Dick now fucking into you harder, red tip still pounding as deep as he could go.

The man’s face was a mix of pleasure and astonishment as if he wasn’t able to believe this was really happening to him. You just felt so damn good around him, walls clinging to his hot cock, sucking him off with each thrust. If he had a say in it, he would have never left your sweet pussy again, keeping his dick buried inside of you, thrusting into you whenever he deemed fit.

The moans and whines of his name that filled the examination room made his vision blur; his balls incredibly tight all of a sudden.

“Harveeey,” you gasped out, your hand reaching for his in an attempt to hold onto something again, fingers gently brushing along his knuckles before intertwining. The brunet above you was panting now, his hips never stilling as he fucked into you. His eyes, however, weren’t focused on your face anymore; they had fallen onto your tits that were bouncing oh so nicely for him with each of his thrusts. He just couldn’t help himself; it was too tempting – his head dipped down, teeth catching one of your pretty pink nipples, nibbling on it just to suck it into his mouth moments later.

You could feel the feeling start to grow inside of you again, your orgasm approaching you, even though you didn’t want this to stop yet. You didn’t want this to end just now, now that he was filling you up so perfectly, cock sliding against your squishy walls with such ease; you didn’t want his balls slapping against your wet cunt to stop just yet, you wanted, no, needed, more.

As if hearing your thoughts, Harvey picked up his pace just a little more, his mouth switching to the other nipple to pay it the same amount of attention. The squelching sound of the wetness between your legs was to die for, just like the feeling of his orgasm hot in his veins.

You just felt so deliciously good, better than any neat whiskey ever could have, and it made him go crazy. He felt hot, he felt like he was just about close enough to heaven to feel it, but not quite there. The bucking of his hips grew more desperate as he chased his orgasm, going hard and deep inside of you while his mouth busied itself leaving hickeys on your bouncing tits. The insecurity from before had vanished, and the groans, the begs, the whines, the praise, all coming from you was enough to keep it away.

“Harvey, I am- fuck, I am so close-“

He would have answered, had he been able to. But he had basically gone mute, aside from the whimpers and groans, as well as high-pitched moans that dared to tumble from his tongue. Instead, he just nodded at you and did his best to pick up the pace some more. It was just so hard with you sucking around him so nicely, drooling all over his dick. So hard to focus when he could feel you shake beneath him, making his body ache for the final push.

The bite to your tit he gave you, combined with his deepest thrust yet was enough for you. You squeezed his hand tightly, your toes curling and your back arching in as finally allowed the release to flow over you. You cried out his name, your sweet, pretty cunt spasming around poor Harvey, who was, admittedly, both absolutely pussy-drunk and empty-minded.

His breathing now came in forceful, laboured pushes, and if he had ever heard a patient breathe like that, he would have sent them straight to bed and run endless tests on them. But this – this was nothing but the sheer hunger for one person.

He suddenly slammed forward once more, his back arching in as he moaned out your name loudly, penis twitching as he came inside of you, cum painting your walls white. He had to squeeze his eyes shut to not lose focus, his mouth hanging open as he fucked you through your orgasm. Your legs were quivering with each thrust that sent shocks up your spine from the overstimulation that slowly started to nag at you.

Panting, the brunet tried to keep himself from crashing down on top of you, a thin layer of sweat covering his forehead. His eyes were still hazy as they took in your fucked-out expression. You looked ruined but also completely…satisfied.

Your hand was still shaky as you reached up to let it run down his flushed cheek, a smile on your lips. “That definitely helped, Harv,” you whispered, voice slightly more hoarse than it had been that morning.

Harvey cleared his throat, and after a moment or maybe two – maybe also three, he just felt so good inside of you – pulled out of you, shaky legs carrying him over to the sink where he wettened some paper towels to clean you up.

“I am glad I was able to help.”

Disappointment settled in your stomach. Was that it? Did he just go back to his professional self like the table beneath you wasn’t drenched in your wetness and his cum?

“But I need to run a few more tests. I think home visits would be best; I’d need different surfaces and times.”

Click. Two lambs had fallen for the trap

[artyandink]

maine coon

Summary: Dean initially hated your small touches. He used to feel weird with them on his skin. But now he craves them. He craves the high of feeling like a human, and you’re the best hit he’s ever had.

TW: Mentions of borderline dehumanisation (cause we hate John guys for making those two beautiful boys soldiers/mindless machines), two idiots in love, tooth rotting fluff! Thought up this little drabble :)

A/N - Maine coon because they’re a very friendly cat breed! Plus, a little comfort for Dean cause he needs it :) set in s1

Little touches.

It started like that. Just small brushes of your hand on his shoulder and ruffling of Sam’s hair. The younger Winchester would brush you off politely, fix his hair but wear an affectionate smile anyway.

Not Dean.

Dean would grumble, pout angrily, act as if he was wiping off the invisible trail your hands left and claim that he wasn’t a baby. All at first. But slowly, like an ice lolly in the sun, slowly melting, he found himself less inclined to brush you off. He’d get jumpy and irritable if you didn’t show him that affection for too long. He even found his nightmares appearing less frequently after being lulled to sleep with his head in your lap, your fingers in his hair because he couldn’t sleep.

You slept better too, knowing he was ok and he was able to turn to you, even though it was wordless. All it took was a flash of puppy eyes and you knew what he needed. The comfort that he deserved, after working himself to the bone protecting Sammy and you like his father taught him. Like a good soldier.

He didn’t feel like that with you.

Sleep was gently coaxed out of him by the sensation of nails on his scalp, a groan muffled by his face in his pillow as he instantly recognised the cool sensation of the ring on your finger as your hand smoothed down his hair. “Wake up, Dean.” You murmured softly, your thumb tracing his ear, and he almost smiled at the sensation. Almost.

The aroma of coffee hit his lungs, and when your hand ran down to gently press against his shoulders and massaging down to his shoulder blades, he didn’t feel so inclined to sleep further. So he sat up. He wanted to see you, your gorgeous face, with the eyes that told a thousand stories and those lips that were worth a thousand dollars when they were pursed in anger. Which only came out when someone hurt him or Sam.

He didn’t feel like he had a sword and shield in his hand in moments like these. Instead, he had a warm cup of coffee and your hand briefly petting his hair, which he leaned into before it even touched his head. “Mornin’.” He rasped out, voice crackly and hoarse from the morning, smacking his lips to get the morning taste off before taking the first heavenly hit of caffeine. And relishing in the aftershocks of the second euphoric high of your touch. “S’some damn good coffee, darlin’.”

“Black, two spoons o’ sugar, and a dash of beer.” You gave him a small smile as you stood up and moved to the kitchenette of your small motel room, looking beautiful to Dean even in your oversized shirt and sleep shorts, complete with black ankle socks. You had bed head that you were yet to sort out, but Dean was dazzled by the halo he could see over your head.

His mom said angels were watching over him. Maybe this is what she meant.

“Just how you like it.” You added, working to make some breakfast. The smell of cooking eggs and frying bacon filled the space, a small smile on your face as you contently cooked food for the man who was approaching you, coffee cup raising to his lips as his eyes followed you like a lost puppy. The cup clinked as it was set down on the counter, Dean’s tongue darting out to lick his lips before biting the bottom one as he tentatively made his way over to rest his chin on your shoulder from behind, his eyes closing slowly like a cat when your hand reached behind to gently play with his hair.

“Smells nice.” He murmured, almost like a purr as he leaned into your touch.

You chuckled, your fingers rubbing over the silky, spiky strands of his morning hedgehog hair. “That’s ‘cause I’m an amazing cook.”

“I don’t deserve you.” Dean added with a contented groan, wanting so badly to tell you how he felt. So much that it was threatening to burst out of his chest.

“What did I tell you about saying that?” You chastised, piling his plate with a bit extra of everything that he liked before sliding it closer to him. “C’mon, eat.”

“Thanks.” He cupped your cheeks, leaning in.

It was meant to be a simple kiss on the forehead. That’s all it was meant to be. But by some miracle (or maybe his eternal bad luck), his lips pressed against yours. Soft, slow, sweet. He puckered up, eyebrows raising in surprise, his eyelashes fluttering but staying closed before he decided to pull himself away, but it felt like yanking. Tugging. Practically peeling himself off, cause he didn’t want to let go.

His eyes didn’t open for at least a few second. But when he did, he saw yours. Your shining eyes, with a small, amused smile on your lips. Your gorgeous lips, that he just wanted to see swollen with all the kisses and love he could give you.

“What was that for?” Came your voice, quiet and docile as you looked at him in a way that only you could. Only you.

“I don’t know.” He murmured, eyes flicking to your lips again, itching for that high again. That hit. So he let himself taste you again, let himself lose his way in the labyrinth that came with your hand on the side of his neck and his cradling your cheek. The taste of coffee, the different ways you both liked it sweetening your palettes in a beautiful mix of sweet, sour and alcohol. The smell of old leather gracing you while the scent of your lavender body wash flooded him and sent him past cloud nine.

You pulled back slowly, because you also wanted to savour him. But when you saw the look on his face, his slightly swollen lips and the way they were parted in awe, you couldn’t help but melt and thumb his bottom lip.

“I think…” You paused to kiss his cheek softly, whispering against it, “I think I know.”

Make sure to leave feedback, everyone! I’d appreciate reblogs, likes and comments!

TAGLIST: @k-slla

[werecreature-addicted]

I am FERAL right now

Creature of the deep/siren like monster boyfriend during egg laying season and he's all uncomfortable and clingy. Being more aggressive and defensive when anything nearing his slit. Especially if you point out anything leaking out

It's night out and he can't get comfortable against the rock he usually lays in when you both mean. His fins are flared and he's more unstable on his legs than usual. Lost the confidence and teasing as his tail twitched and writhed when anything would press against his abdomen

When you can finally get him to lay across his lap he's clawing and hissing at you touching his abdomen until 2 slick, leaking, tentacle like cocks slide out and are positively DROOLING in the moonlight. Begging to be touched and lay eggs. He immediately started twitching but honey you gonna have to deal with those sharp claws in your arm.

Worst of it? He can't cum until he's laid all his eggs, and judging from how sensitive and swollen his slit is, it'll be awhile. He's extremely sensitive as you slowing coax out eggs from his urethra, goo like slick pouring down from the widened tube to lay eggs. And he is SOBBING at every touch.

Twitching, dry(?) orgasms, crying, and screaming all from the feeling of you trying to jack out his eggs. Blood on his hands from where he scratched you, he can't even lick it like he usually did.

And don't get me started on the final eggs. You would have to push a finger into the slit to try and press on the gland, but oh no! It's too much on your boyfriend and he fucking loses it. Screaming and kicking the second he feels you push anything in his slit. You would have to prepare him to do it again and even then he's biting you and leaving your hands covered in your blood and his slick. His tail slamming against the sand as you pump out the last egg.

Last part from there is to finish what you begun. Both his cocks are leaking out, and it doesn't taken him long to cum at all. A few pumps and light touches to his overworked slit and cock has him cumming in seconds. Next thing you know, your boyfriend is out cold and you both are covered in cum. And it's so hot because you've never seen him cum when remotely this much before.

I'm so normal about this

had to get this in before the end of MerMay.

Mermaid boyfriend who insists you take a week off of work to spend with him during breeding season. there's no way he's letting you go when he feels this way, so it's better if you just plan ahead to be with him. Even when he sleeps he keeps his cock inside of you, subconsciously thrusting his hips mumbling to himself as he fills you with his warm sticky cum, then when he wakes up he'll fuck you with a renewed passion as he thinks about his wet dream.

you have your work cut out for you, milking too big cocks for all his eggs, teasing the slit head, maybe you're mean and slot your finger into his opening fucking his cock with your finger and plugging up the eggs so the pressure builds in his dick. mermaids lay hundreds of eggs and each one makes him shudder and pant and whine as it pushes out of him.

He's in a cold sweat as he bites and sucks on your skin his mind fried. he has to fuck you, he needs to cum in you and get you pregnant every fiber of his being is begging him to snap forward and claim you again and again. but his cock aches, he's cum so much today that he's dizzy with overstimulation. he needs to but he can't.

Maybe he'll just eat you out for a while while his cock takes a break. hopefully, the taste of his cum on your sweet cunt doesn't make him cum untouched.

[ohhiimweird]

Dating them, except they're a monkey

Characters: Sun Wukong, Macaque, MK (brooo where's the yellow text) Reader Pronouns: Gender Neutral Warnings: Nothing, just fluff! ...

Sun Wukong

surprisingly he's a little awkward at the beginning of the relationship

i'm gonna assume you're the first mortal he's ever dated. so, he doesn't know what to do since you're much more vulnerable than he is

very cuddly, like suuuupper touch starved. he'll cling to you like you'd disappear if he lets go. it gets to the point where you start to smell like him

speaking of that, he is BEGGING you to wear his cape. if you've fallen asleep, guess what's going on you, the cape

later on into the relationship, he opens up more about the utter amount of guilt in him about literally everything he's done

if you give him enough encouragement, he might try to close the gap in his and macaque's relationship and maybe they'll be friends again. who knows?

wukong cherishes you more than anything in this entire world, and he's gonna make sure the world knows that (you're included in that)

he's also uber protective because you're a mortal and can die very easily. the only way to fix that is if he makes you immortal with one of those peaches

Macaque

this is a SLOW BURN, but worth is in the end

he'll have some big trouble trying to let you in near the beginning of the relationship. in a way he's still trying to fight his feelings for you, despite you accepting him for who he is

although he's trying to get better, his thoughts still tell him he's not worthy of someone like you, it's not an uncommon thought when the whole world has pushed you aside or used you

when he sees that you're not like the others (ha) he'll warm up to the idea of being loved and loving you

he's not as touchy-feely as wukong, but he'll rest his head in your lap while you scratch behind his ears

he'll quietly purr but if you bring it up, he won't admit it

if you can't sleep, he'll tell you a little story using his shadow lantern (it's about your relationship with the names changed lol)

in a way, he's even more protective than wukong since you're the one that lit up his world. no one is gonna take that away from him

MK

it's weird but he's the least awkward when getting into a relationship with you...actually it depends on when that happens

if we're talking about early in the show, then he's more nervous because wow he just pulled you and you're hot

it we're talking about post-trauma, then he's nervous because he's got the world on his shoulders and doesn't know how to let you in

You're also dealing with monkey boy shenanigans. bro is tripping into you constantly because of either walking with or without a tail

MK is also getting you little trinkets of your favorite things or a cool rock he found. he's like a cross between a penguin and a crow

if he has a rough day he'll just cling to you like velcro and let out this big content huff while you watch monkey cop or something

Pigsy loves you, Tang ADORES you. he is making wedding plans for y'all and you aren't even engaged yet

Whenever you come home, MK runs up to you like a dog and drowns you in hugs and kisses, even if you're holding groceries. you lost a lot of eggs because of that (rip soldier)

[covenofagatha]

But you're my stepmom! (Part 5)

Word count: 2700

Warnings: super brief mention of smut

Taglist:@stayevildarling @i-just-cannot @hazey-g @buttercandy16 @320viada @evilangels-stuff @rmaximoff @morganismspam23 @aboutcustardcreams @sasheemo @rigglemethat @walkethisway @mommywandas

A/N: I apologize in advance for this one hehe. Next chapter will be more satisying ;)

When you wake up, you are alone with a pounding headache. You roll over with a grunt and reach a hand out to touch the pillow next to you, see if it still has Agatha’s warmth, but doesn’t. You can’t help but feel stung even though you know you’re being irrational. Of course she wasn’t going to spend the night with you. She probably untangled herself from you the second you’d fallen asleep. 

But you remember the way her body felt curled around yours and you sigh. You’re playing a dangerous game, sweetheart. Her words from the pool last night echo in your head. Last night, they were daring almost, but in the cold light of morning, they are a warning. She is married to your father and twice your age. You can’t be doing this with her, whatever it is. 

You check the time and realize you’ve slept in later than you usually do. You begrudgingly get out of bed and brush your teeth, staring at your pale face in the mirror. Agatha doesn’t want you, you tell yourself. You’re just reading into things. 

More than just a small part of you is disappointed. 

You dig around your closet and are able to find a pair of shorts and a sweater in your closet to throw on. You’re spending the day with Agatha and your dad, still unsure of the plans. 

You check your phone and see five missed calls and 27 texts from Wanda, checking to make sure you were alright. You hadn’t been able to find her before you left the party last night but according to her texts, Rio had seen you get into a car and told Wanda. 

You shoot her a quick text letting her know you’re alive and that you made it home safely. You want to open up to your friend about your night with Agatha but you don’t think Wanda would understand. 

When you go downstairs, the smell of bacon and eggs reaches your nose and you see your step-mother at the stove cooking. 

“Good morning,” you say groggily, taking a seat on a stool at the island. The bacon sizzles and you wince at the noise. She turns around and smiles, always the picture of perfection.

“How are you feeling?” 

You moan in response, dropping your head onto the cool countertop. It feels good and dulls the pain in your head just a little. 

“I remember those days,” she says fondly with a chuckle. And then she places a plate down next to you just a bit too loudly for it to be an accident. 

“Heyyy,” you whine, lifting your head slightly to glare at her. 

“Eat up. You’ll feel better.” You grumble and do as you’re told. While you’re eating, she continues talking. “Your father will be home soon. Have you thought about what you want to do today?”

“Is laying on the couch for the next seven hours an option?”

Agatha smirks. “Unfortunately for you, no. But we could watch a movie or something.” She regards the miserable state you’re in. “Do you want me to get you some advil?” You nod pathetically. 

She leaves the kitchen and you hear her footsteps on the stairs. You’re a little hurt that she hasn’t even mentioned last night. Should you bring it up? You scoff at yourself. What would you even say? Why didn’t you stay with me? or Hey, wanna get back in the pool? 

She is obviously trying to set boundaries and you can do that. You can be good. Better for everyone that way. 

And then she comes back in, places two pills in front of you, and casually says, “You talk in your sleep.” 

Your cheeks heat up immediately. “Um, what did I say?” 

She smirks. “Sounded like you were having a good dream.”

“I don’t even remember what I was–” And fuck, your dream comes back to you in flashes. Agatha pushing you against the side of her pool, grinding her thigh up between your legs. Her telling you to hump it like the desperate little girl that you are. Your eyes widen, horrified. Was that the reason she left? You must’ve been moaning, or even worse, did you say her name? You vaguely remember her leg between yours last night before drifting off, were you moving on it? You drop your head into your hands, the flush from your face spreading all down your neck.“I’m so sorry,” you say through your fingers, determined to never look at Agatha ever again. 

She laughs. “Don’t be, it’s not like you could control it. So, who were you thinking about?” You peek up to see her leaning on her elbows over the counter, eyes wide. You definitely don’t notice how her position pushes her breasts up and closer together, giving you a much better look at her cleavage. 

At least you didn’t moan her name in your sleep. 

“Uh-” you say, mind racing to think of literally anyone besides her. Thankfully, that’s the moment you hear the garage open. You’ve never been so excited for your dad to be home. Agatha winks knowingly and takes your empty plate, rinsing it off in the sink.

“My favorite ladies!” Your dad exclaims as he walks into the kitchen. You offer him a tight-lipped smile and Agatha pats his arm when he leans in to kiss her cheek. You tune out when Agatha asks him about his meetings and he starts recounting his trip. You’ve listened to your fair share of boring work stories from him. 

“So, sweet pea, what’s on the agenda today?” He asks, bringing you back to focus.

“Maybe we can watch some Desperate Housewives?” Before the divorce, you and your dad had spent quite a lot of time together watching TV shows, Desperate Housewives being one of your favorites. 

He smiles. “Sounds perfect. Let me go take a shower and then we can start.”

Agatha busies herself by cleaning up the kitchen while you flop onto the couch. Your headache is starting to subside but you still feel gross from the hangover. You close your eyes and float somewhere between consciousness and sleep until your dad finally comes back downstairs. 

“Alright, what season are we watching?” He asks, handing you the remote. Agatha sits down next to you, pulling a blanket over the two of you and he sits on the other side of her. You flick through the episodes, picking one from season 6 at random. 

You had to admit, it is actually nice to sit here with Agatha and your dad. You feel a sense of peace that you usually don’t when you’re at this house. 

And then you remember what episode this is. The one where Katherine realizes that she might have feelings for Robin and has a fantasy about her. A hot fantasy. You swallow and squirm, your leg starting to bounce anxiously. Normally, you wouldn’t be so affected by the scene on the TV, but you’re suddenly hyper aware of the woman sitting next to you. 

Agatha, seemingly having enough of your leg tapping, reaches her hand out underneath the blanket and places it squarely on your thigh. 

You stifle a gasp and freeze. You forget how to breathe when she starts to slowly drag her nails up and down your leg, pausing every time when they reach the juncture between your leg and hip. You can literally feel the wetness pooling in your underwear. 

She continues doing that for the rest of the episode and you just grow needier and needier with every passing second. So you slowly let your legs fall more open. She glances at you out of the corner of her eye so your dad doesn’t notice, the hint of a smirk pulling at her lips. 

Her hand slides to the inside of your thigh and this time you can’t hold back your sharp intake of air. 

“You okay?” Your dad asks, looking over Agatha to check on you. She squeezes your leg playfully, sending jolts of electricity right to your cunt. 

You nod, not trusting that your voice won’t waver and give your state of arousal away. 

Agatha slowly leans into you, mouth pressing against your ear, hand moving closer to the center of your legs, and whispers, “Good girl.” 

An honest-to-god whimper slips out of your mouth and you cover it up with a cough. “I’m gonna go get some water,” you choke out and practically jump off the couch like you’ve been burned. 

Agatha just smirks. 

In the kitchen, you take deep breaths, trying to calm your nerves. You can’t be imagining it now. Whatever Agatha is doing, it is completely on purpose. You can still feel her heated touch on your thigh and your stomach is still in flames. 

You grab a glass of water and head back to the living room, mentally preparing for more of Agatha’s touches. 

You walk back in the living room and stop dead in your tracks. On the couch, illuminated by the glow of the TV, is Agatha and your dad kissing. 

You drop the glass. It’s the fourth thing you’ve broken in their house in the past two days, if anyone is keeping track. But that’s not what you’re focused on. 

They break apart and whirl toward the sound of the noise. Your dad stands up, apologizing, but you don’t even see him. You’re too busy staring at Agatha, who is chewing on her lip, looking back at you. Her gaze is filled with concern and – fuck, is that pity? 

You scoff. Of course it is. You inwardly curse at letting yourself be so stupid, feelings of betrayal and anger coursing through your veins replacing the desire you had just been feeling. 

You turn on your heel and rush upstairs, throwing your clothes from last night that are folded on your bed into a bag. You pick up your phone and scroll through your contact list, hitting the call button. 

“Please pick up,” you mutter to yourself, pacing back and forth. 

Finally on the third ring, she does. “Hello?” Rio Vidal asks, sounding surprised. 

“Hey, Rio. Do you want to go do something right now?” 

“Oh. Uh, yeah, I’d love to. What do you want to do?” 

“Let’s go to a bar and get older people to buy us drinks,” you say, your stomach already protesting at the thought of consuming more alcohol after last night. 

You can tell she feels the same way by her long groan.

“Okay, fine. We don’t have to drink. But we can still go dance and have fun. Please?” 

“Okay. What time?”

You check your watch. It’s early in the afternoon but you can’t stand to spend another minute in this house. “How about in an hour? I’ll pick you up?” 

She agrees and you hang up. And now for getting out of here. 

Both your dad and Agatha watch you as you walk back down the stairs. “Everything okay?” Your dad asks tentatively. 

“Wanda’s kind of having an emergency right now. Would you be able to take me back to Mom’s house so I can go be with her? My car’s there.” You don’t even look at Agatha but you can feel her eyes locked on you.

Your dad frowns. “How did you get here then?” 

You can’t help but glance at the older woman, your brain trying to think of something quick. 

“I picked her up this morning,” Agatha quickly jumps in. “I just figured it would be easier that way if we went somewhere.” You fight the urge to give her a grateful look, rage still curling around your insides. 

“Okay, yeah, sure,” your dad sighs. “I was kind of hoping we could spend the day together.” 

“Me, too,” you say half-heartedly. “Maybe next weekend though? I’m sorry, Wanda really needs me.” 

“Let me grab my keys,” he says, leaving the room. You walk straight to the front door, ignoring Agatha saying your name. 

The car ride home is filled with awkward conversation about school and work. Nothing out of the usual there, though. He pulls into the driveway and parks the car, turning towards you. You can hardly wait for whatever he’s going to say next. 

“How’s your mother doing?” He used to ask you that all the time when the divorce first happened, but not so much anymore. Not since Agatha. 

“She’s good,” you say softly. He nods like he’s glad to hear it. And then you step out of the car and go into your mom’s house to get ready. 

***

Rio swings open the door almost immediately after your first knock. She’s wearing a cute green dress that pairs nicely with your purple dress. 

“You ready?” You ask and she shuts the door behind her, following you to your car. “How was the rest of the party last night?

She shrugs. “It was fine. I threw up a few times. Nat and Marie won like three more games of beer pong.”

“Of course they did.” The rest of the ride is silent. Rio’s not a big talker and you don’t feel like saying much. 

The Hex is the only 18+ bar in Westview and you’ve been a couple times before. You find it slightly disgusting, but you need to take your mind off Agatha. You were being stupid, you realize that now. 

The line is short, on account of it still being pretty early, and not many people are in the bar. You and Rio find a secluded table to sit at and you order some chips and queso and drinks. The two of you fall into easy conversation now, pointing out things about the other people there. You’re both in the middle of giggling when all of a sudden the music turns on and people start to make their way to the middle of the floor that’s clear. 

“Come on!” You jump up and grab Rio, leading her to the center. She rolls her eyes amusedly but comes willingly. You lose yourself in the music, spinning around with Rio until you see someone with long dark hair. You suddenly stop. The woman turns around and it’s someone you don’t recognize. 

You scowl. 

There’s another brunette dancing with a man, arms around his shoulders. They’re kissing and all you can think about is your dad and Agatha. 

“Hey, are you okay?” Rio shouts over the music. She’s stopped dancing now too and is gently touching your shoulder. Before you can even think, you grasp her cheeks with your hands and pull her into a kiss. 

She kisses you back, her hands flying to your shoulders but you can’t get the thought of Agatha out of your head. Rio’s mouth feels good against yours but you just keep picturing that you’re kissing the older woman. 

“Fuck,” you say in frustration, pulling away, realizing that your eyes are welling up. “I’m sorry.” And then you’re storming off to the bathroom, Rio hot on your heels. 

You’re breathing hard, fists clenching the sink, when the door opens. 

“Hey,” Rio says with uncharacteristic gentleness. She strokes her fingers through your hair, eyes meeting yours in the mirror. You turn around, blinking back tears. “What’s going on?” 

“I’m sorry,” you repeat, sniffling. “There’s this woman that I like but she’s with someone else and I thought that she might like me but I’m just an idiot.” Venting about it feels good, even if you can’t tell her the exact details. 

Her face softens. “Well, she’s a fool.” You choke out a laugh, wiping the snot from your nose with the back of your hand. 

“Thank you. For saying that, for coming with me tonight.”

She smiles. “Of course.” 

“Could you, um, could you give me a minute?” You ask and she nods with understanding and slips out the door. You take a shaky breath and look back at yourself in the mirror. You have a cute girl out there who likes you. Stop acting pathetic over a middle-aged woman and get your act together, you tell yourself. 

You straighten yourself up and leave the bathroom. You spot Rio across the bar and you’re making your way over to her when someone grabs your wrist tightly. 

“Hey, ouch!” You exclaim, turning to see who it is. 

Now, this time, it’s a brunette you do know. 

And she looks pissed. 

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Agatha hisses. 

[heartfullofleeches]

Breakfast with the murder clown gang

[Mime Darling rubs sleep from their eyes as they stumble into the kitchen]

"Well look who decided to join us! I started on some pancakes for us - before I remembered waffles are way better and switched over to those. There's a bit of both so you can decide, but we all know the superior choice."

"Pancakes and waffles? Hm, I do hope Mimey will at least try a bite of these biscuits I made. Look, they're shaped like little hearts. I even whipped up some jam to go with them."

"I-I made eggs! They're probably the only thing I can made without burning the kitchen down...I know it's not much, but i hope you like them...."

"Made you some cinnamon rolls... Heh.... Promise I used real frosting this time."

"All that, but no meat. Come sit with me, Mimey. I'll share my sausage with you."

Red stands awkwardly off to the side - holding a glass of juice they poured for the mime. They have never touched a stove a day in their life besides to heat up pizza bagels.

Mime Darling:

Later:

"Oh, no.....I think we might've overfed them...again."

"Poor thing probably didn't want to hurt our feelings.... Such a sweetheart....."

[Mime Darling scrapes the last bit of food on their plate into their mouth - head resting on the table as their fork falls from their hand, eyes putting up their best fight to stay open. Red throws a blanket over their shoulders, picking the mime up as fatigue catches them in its grasp]

"Whoever finishes cleaning their mess first gets to hold them next."

[The clowns trip over each other searching for cleaning supplies]

[springtyme]

Hi sage <3 can we get more luca? pistachio kisses was so perfect, I would love more like it.

thank you, thank you, thank youuu <3

𝐀 𝐒𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐎𝐟 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞 ♡

Chef Luca x reader || Main Masterlist || Spotify

summary: Some moments can feel so simple, yet so fundamental at the same time. This morning with Luca is one of those moments.

word count: 1.7k

𝐎𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞: 𝐃𝐚𝐲 𝟏𝟓) 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐎𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐏𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐨𝐫𝐲

You are sitting on the kitchen counter, legs gently swinging as you watch Luca by the sink, his back facing you, humming softly to himself as he washes his hands. The sunlight streams in through the window, casting a warm glow around the room. The scent of freshly ground coffee beans fills the air, while the cosy bubbling of the coffee brewing in the coffee maker mixes with the sound of Luca’s quiet humming.  

The warmth of the morning envelops you, and your body sways gently as you sit, taking in the comforting ambiance, and you can’t help but smile at the simple, serene moment unfolding before you. You admire Luca’s easy movements, the way the water cascades over his hands, glistening in the light. The golden light from the window plays off his hair, and the warm tones of the kitchen seem to wrap around him like a comforting embrace.

As he finishes washing his hands, he glances over his shoulder and catches your gaze, a smile breaking across his face that lights up the room even more than the sunlight. “What has you smiling like that?” he says, his voice warm and melodic.

You widen your smile in return, feeling a flutter of warmth in your chest. “You,” you reply, your voice soft and light, swinging your legs a little more, the rhythm of the moment making everything feel easy and carefree.

Luca wipes his hands on a towel, stepping over to you to lean against the counter beside you. He leans in slightly, just close enough that you can feel his warmth radiating toward you. His presence is grounding, a blend of comfort and familiarity. He tilts his head, consideration evident in his eyes. “Me?”

“Mm, you,” you affirm, nodding your head as you give him your sweetest smile, tilting your head so that your eyes align. 

He chuckles softly, a sound that feels like a gentle melody in the calmness of the kitchen. “What about me?” His eyes sparkle with curiosity, the playful edge in his voice making your heart race a little faster. 

You shrug playfully, your smile widening. “Just… the way you are,” you say, your voice dipping into a conspiratorial tone. “It’s nice watching you be you. It makes me happy… And the fact that you’re cooking me breakfast just makes it even better.”

He laughs softly, the sound a gentle melody that blends seamlessly with the ambience of the kitchen. “Well, it won’t be done in a while.”

You swing your legs a little more, revelling in the easy banter. “That’s okay. I’m perfectly content just watching you for now,” you reply, your eyes twinkling with mischief. “Besides, I might be convinced to lend a hand if you let me stir the eggs or flip some pancakes.”

Luca raises an eyebrow, a teasing smirk playing on his lips. “Oh really? You think you could handle that? Last time you tried to flip a pancake, it ended up on the floor.”

“Excuse me! That was only one time!” you giggle, feigning offence. “And you have to admit, I handled the cleanup like a pro.”

“True, true,” he concedes, stepping closer, his shoulder brushing against yours, enveloping you in warmth. “You definitely have your moments of glory,” he adds, laughter dancing in his eyes. 

“Oh, yeah?” You lean in slightly, lifting your hand and placing it on his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips. 

“Mhm,” he replies, his smile softening as he leans into your touch. 

You can’t help but let out a soft laugh as you lean in, the distance between you narrowing until you catch his lips in a gentle kiss, soft and lingering. His lips feel warm and inviting against yours, and that soft connection sends a delightful flutter through your chest. 

You pull away just enough to meet his gaze, your hearts a little more intertwined in that single moment. The world outside fades away, leaving just the two of you amidst the comfortable clutter of the morning.    

Luca’s eyes linger on yours, a mixture of surprise and delight shimmering in the depths of his gaze. The corners of his mouth curve upward, and a soft blush dusts his cheeks, enhancing the golden light that envelops him. He opens his mouth like he is about to say something, but before he gets to it the sound of your stomach growling interrupts the moment, echoing through the quiet kitchen. You both burst into laughter, as it reminds you of the reason you started this whole exchange in the first place.

Luca raises an eyebrow, the laughter still lighting up his face. “I guess I should go back to cooking breakfast, huh?” he says, his playful tone still dancing between you.

“One more kiss first,” you reply with a teasing smile, leaning in closer again, your heart racing at the thought of his lips against yours once more.  

Luca chuckles, the sound rich and warm. “You drive a hard bargain,” he says, feigning a sigh as he leans in, closing the distance between you. His lips meet yours again, this time a little more playfully, as if both of you are rediscovering that sweet spark that keeps igniting between you. 

You pull away, breathless, and give him a playful nudge with your shoulder. “Okay, okay, now you can get back to cooking,” you say, grinning.

Luca shakes his head, still smiling as he steps back toward the stove. He moves with an effortless grace, gathering ingredients from the countertop while his eyes occasionally flicker back to you, as if checking that you’re still watching. You settle back onto the counter, propping yourself up with your hands as you observe him, feeling a swell of affection that bubbles just beneath the surface. 

He opens the fridge and pulls out a fresh orange, the vibrant colour contrasting beautifully against the pale whites and browns of the kitchen. “Since you’re so good at being patient,” he says, holding it up with a playful gleam in his eyes, “how about a little something to nibble on while you wait?”

You smile, reaching out to accept the orange, but he doesn’t hand it over.

Your curiosity piqued, you watch as he expertly begins to peel the orange, his movements fluid and confident. His fingers move swiftly, deftly removing the skin in spiralling sections, the scent of citrus filling the air, mixing with the aroma of coffee and adding a fresh note to the kitchen. You can’t help but admire the way his concentration furrows his brow slightly. Each twist of the fruit reveals sections of juicy, succulent flesh beneath a bright and smooth exterior.

“See? This is what I’m talking about,” he says playfully, tossing the first few strips of peel into the sink with a satisfied flick of his wrist. “Here,” he says, holding out a perfect, juicy segment, the sun gleaming off its fresh pulp. “Just for you.”

You take the orange from his hand, feeling a burst of  gratitude at his thoughtful gesture. “Thank you,” you say softly, almost shyly as you inhale the refreshing scent of citrus. “I can’t believe that you’re peeling my oranges for me… You’re too sweet to me, you know?”

“I know that you don’t like getting the peel under your nails.” He says it like it is a well-worn secret, a tiny quirk he has memorised over time. 

You feel how warmth spreads in your chest by his words, making your heart flutter. He said it like it was so simple and so logical, and maybe it is, but to you it feels substantial, it’s like he’s holding a little piece of your heart in his hands. 

You jump down from the counter and step closer to him, feeling the urge to bridge the gap between the countertop and the stove. As you approach him, the warmth emanating from the stove intertwines with the warmth in your chest. You watch as he prepares the rest of the orange on a plate for you, pulling off those little white strings of pith.  

You feel a wave of adoration wash over you. You can’t resist reaching out, lightly brushing your fingers against his arm, a silent thank-you for all the little things he does.

Luca glances over at you, his eyes sparkling as he meets your gaze. The atmosphere feels electric, the air thick with an unspoken connection that pulls you closer. 

“Come here,” you say softly, stepping even closer, feeling a mixture of excitement and warmth radiating between you. It feels natural to inch forward, the magnetic pull urging you to close the distance.

“Where to?” he teases, a playful smile tugging at his lips as he looks at you, completely at ease. His casual demeanour only makes you want him closer.

“Just… closer.” Your voice is barely above a whisper, a tone that somehow carries the weight of all your feelings. The space between you flickers with an undeniable chemistry, a warmth that’s almost palpable.

With a soft, breathy chuckle, Luca takes a step toward you, the light from the window spilling over him like a golden blanket. He places the plate of orange on the counter beside him before leaning in, resting his hands on the edge, effectively locking you in his gentle gaze.

“You mean like this?” He leans slightly, his face just inches from yours, his breath mingling with yours—warm, sweet, and filled with the comfort of those playful moments you share.

“Exactly like that,” you reply, feeling a giddy thrill at the proximity as you lean in to plant another soft kiss on his lips, feeling the warmth radiate between you. It’s that familiar tingle, the way everything feels vibrant and alive when you’re near him.

Luca pulls back just enough to look into your eyes, his expression softening. “What was that for?” His voice is low and earnest, wrapping around you like the sun’s rays streaming through the window.

You smile, your heart fluttering at the warmth in his gaze. “Just because,” you reply, letting the simple sentiment linger in the air between you. “Because I can, and because you are you.”

Luca’s cheeks flush slightly, and you can see the delight dancing in his eyes. He tilts his head, contemplating your words as if they’re the sweetest secret you’ve shared. “Well, I must say, I’m quite fond of your reasons…”

[ofstarsandvibranium]

Passion

Fandom: Star Wars - The Acolyte

Pairing: Qimir x GN!Reader

Summary: Your attraction to Qimir grows as well as your strength in the Force.

Qimir Masterlist

Not only has Qimir been helping you strengthen your connection to the Force. He's also been helping you how to fight and attack those who threaten to knock you down if they so choose.

He swings at you with a staff and you bend back as it nearly hits your head. He swings overhead and you block the hit with your own staff.

"Good," he pulls back, twirling his weapon in his hand, "Your defense is strong. Now it's your turn. Attack me," he goes into a stance, holding his staff out.

You yell out as you come at him with full force. You swing left and right. Your blows are blocked in swift, fluid motions. You thrust your staff at him and he dodges it.

You glare at him, which makes him chuckle. That sounds eggs you on further as you continue to attack Qimir with as much strength as you can.

"You're frustrated. Good. Use that feeling and call upon the Force."

He swings at you and you block it. Both of your staffs forming an X. You know Qimir is holding back his strength and it makes you a little bit angry. You feel yourself vibrate as you summon the Force.

Qimir, feeling you go stronger, hardens his gaze. He leans in, occupying the open space between the two staffs, his lips close to yours, "Do it," he whispers.

You punch your fist forward and, with the Force, Qimir is thrust into the air and falls onto his back with a hard thud.

He groans out a laugh, "That's it. That's what I've been waiting for." He sits up and rolls back his shoulders, "That," he points at you, "I need more of that from you."

You let out a deep breath and walk over to him. You stick your hand out and he takes it. You help him to his feet and when he stands, his face is right up close to yours.

"You're doing well," he says softly, his breath upon your lips.

He's been getting a lot closer these days. His touch and eyes lingering on you. You shouldn't like it, but you can't help it.

You always found Qimir as attractive, but now with the closeness and his bold actions, your resolve is weakening.

You gulp, taking a step back, "But I can be better."

"You're already doing well for the short time you've been here, don't invalidate your efforts." He uses the Force to bring his staff to him, and he holds out his hand for yours. You hand it to him and look away, "I need to be better."

"And you will in time," he starts trekking down the hill and you follow him, "How long did it take Mae?"

"Stop comparing yourself to her. Her journey is much different from yours."

You follow him in silence until you enter the cave that you now call your home, "Does it bother you that I compare myself to Mae?"

Setting the staffs aside, Qimir sighs, "I understand why you do. A part of me is okay with it because it motivates you. It drives you to work harder and improve."

"But?"

"But Mae is different. She began her training when she was young. So, yes, she is more skilled and her connection to the Force is much stronger. But that doesn't mean yours won't be. I'll make sure of that," he says the last sentence with finality, leaving you somewhat satisfied with his response.

You let out a deep exhale, "I'm going to wash up and clear my head," you point a finger at him, "I better not find you watching me." He chuckles and turns his back to you.

You go to the shore and proceed to strip to nothing. The weather has been warmer so the cool temperature of the water is a welcoming sensation.

You walk further out to the point you're wading in the water. You let out a relaxed sigh. You cup your hands, scooping up water and dunking it onto your head. You smile to yourself at the cool feeling.

"Y/N," you hear a whisper and you look around.

"Hello?"

"Y/N," you hear the whisper again.

"Qimir?" you call out to the man and he doesn't appear.

You feel a tug at your leg and the whisper of your name again. You don't see anything in the water, yet you still feel a light tug.

You continue to wade there, contemplating about going under or not.

"Y/N, come, Y/N," the distant voice whispers.

Your curiosity gets the best of you. You take a deep breath and plunge yourself underwater.

____________________

Qimir was working on lunch while you cleaned up. Various stews, soups, and occasional roasted meats were what made up a majority of your meals. Today was another stew.

It didn't take long to make, so once it was ready, Qimir was stepping outside the cave, to let you know lunch was ready. No response.

He walks down the path to the shore where he sees your discarded clothes, but he doesn't see you.

"Y/N?!" he calls as he looks around, hoping you'd reveal yourself. Then he sees a splash in the water and your arms flailing about.

"Y/N!" he cries out as he runs into the water without hesitation. He swims as fast as he could to your struggling form. His arms wrapping around you and he begins to pull you towards the shore.

When you break through the surface, you let out a sputtering gasp, water following from your mouth. You're coughing when Qimir finally reaches shore.

He looks at you with concern, "Are you okay? What happened?"

You blink at him in confusion, "Wha-Where-" you take in your surroundings and then realize the state you're in, "Kriff, where are my clothes?"

Qimir quickly hands them to you and you do your best to cover up. He looks away, allowing you to quickly re-dress.

"What happened?" he asks, his back still to you.

"I heard a voice," you respond and he turns back to you with furrowed brows, "A woman's voice. She was calling my name and I felt a tug. It felt like something wanted me to go under the water. So I did and...I'm not sure what happened," you look down, recalling what you saw, "I saw my aunt and then...I think I saw my mother. Then I heard screaming and-and I started choking." You look up, "Has that happened to you before?"

He gives a curt nod, "Voices, a calling. Visions."

"Is it the Force or something else?"

"It might be the Force trying to connect you to something or someone. You said you were raised by your aunt. You never knew your parents?"

You shake your head, "My aunt said they were troubled people, that they got involved into dangerous things. They left me with my aunt and never came back." You clear your throat, "Thank you...for saving me."

"Of course," Qimir mumbles and nods to the cave, "C'mon. Lunch is ready."

___________________________

After lunch, you and Qimir are at the top of the hill again. This time, no weapons.

"The Jedi can fight with and without a saber. You need to be skilled at both if you want to defeat them," Qimir explains as he circles you, "You're proficient, but you need to be better." He then holds up a piece of fabric, "Let's see how you do without one of your senses."

"How am I supposed to fight then?"

"I'll let you figure that out," he says teasingly as he stands behind you, tying the cloth over your eyes.

You do your best to listen to his movements. You hear him step and you immediately turn your head to the right. Hearing another step, this time closer, you immediately punch your right fist out. Qimir immediately catches it in his fist.

"Close."

With his hand still on your wrist, you pull him in and kick him back, making him release you. You're smirking, "Point for me."

He gives a low laugh, "I'll admit, my defenses were down. But they won't be this time."

You inhale and relax your body. You feel the power of the Force within you as Qimir attempts to strike at you but you dodge. You weave through a combination of punches. Block a kick here and there before you're attacking him back.

You can't see it, but he's smiling as he blocks your attempts. His eyes shine with pride and amusement, especially when he blocks one hit, only to be punched in the chest. His chest feels heavy but not because of the hit.

You take a few steps back, slightly breathless, "Another point for me."

You don't hear him and your brows furrow, "Qimir?" he doesn't respond and when you take off your blindfold, he's standing right in front of you. You look at him with concern, "Everything okay?"

He observes you face. Taking in the color of your eyes, the slope of your nose, curve of your lips. His eyes lingering on your lips a little too long.

His hand slowly comes up to cup the back of your neck.

"Qimir," you whisper his name but nothing else. You're not sure what you want to say.

His face draws in closer, his lips a breath away from yours. He's hesitating and you don't want him to any longer.

You close the the gap, pressing your lips against his. You grip onto his shirt as if afraid that he'd disappear if you do.

He kisses you with fervency and desperation. You don't think you've ever been kissed in such a way, with so much want. So much...passion.

When he pulls away for air, he looks at you with a slight haze in his eyes.

Realization sets in. Insecurity creeps.

You move to back away, but stops you, "Don't." his demand is low and desperate, "Don't run from it. I know you've been feeling it too."

"I don't know what I'm feeling," you reply hastily.

He nods, "Yes, you do, because I've been feeling it since we first met." He lifts his hand up and you lift yours, mirroring his. You feel the pulsing vibrations between the two of you. You feel the pull of him, the want to be close to him.

"What does it mean?"

Qimir takes your hand, interlocking his fingers with yours, "That we are meant to be."

[moneymartin]

kate hcs? like what u did w nika plsss

・❥・- gf!kate hcs

warnings: harddd smut under the divider at the end and suggestive content :p

afab!r

a/n: i genuinely love doing hcs more than writing full on fics cause my lord i cannot write a whole story without going off track and ruining the entire thing… got carried away like always. also this is longgg overdue as well. i’ve been procrastinating everything and i feel bad for not releasing anything sooner like i promised. thank you for being patient w me lolz

i’m glad that we all agree… kate is theeee golden retriever girlfriend

i mean who wouldn’t say that

blonde masc that gives off happy vibes and literally has a tattoo that says ‘sunshine’

treats you like a real fuckin’ princess like she knows what she’s doing

okay kate lovesssss the kids

her and carson are so adorbs 💔

when someone asks her what her profession is she is not gonna say a pro hooper

shes gonna say that shes carson’s aunt 😭

def takes you over to kennedy’s house when she’s gone and makes you babysit carson w her 🥹

loves when they hold her fingers she thinks its the cutest thing in the world and you photograph the whole thing

spoils you fosho!!!!

mention one lil thing and shes buying it for you

new clothes, bags, shoes, jewelry, accessories. ANYTHING YOU WANNTTT!!!

yk how she likes tswift…

takes you to a concert for your bday if you do too

and wears that stupid cowboy hat 😒

but you guys would be matching soooo

DEFINITELY loves physical touch

hands hands handssss

they’re all over you in public like she is not afraid to show people you’re hers 😩

on your waist or hips. her fingers are always on you somehow

also does it romantically like she’ll intertwine pinkies with you and always holds your hand no matter the situation

the thumb thing is her favorite

loves pda foshooooo

i don’t think she’d be possessive but i feel like shes the jealous type

sees you w a girl at the bar or sumn and starts to FREAK!

she’ll sit next to you immediately and is touching you all over so that the girl goes away 😭

or shes burying her face into your neck and kissing your skin in front of her

WHEW!!!

everyone can disagree w me on this but i see her as lil spoon when you guys cuddle…

FIGHT ME ALL YOU WANT BUT THIS GIRL LOVEEESSSS WHEN YOU PLAY W HER HAIR WHILE SHE SLEEPS

kisses your neck or your collar while shes half asleep 😣

back rubs are her fav thing too

shes the one getting them tho cause she’s always so tense after practice and she believes that if you do it she’ll feel better already

we all know shes a passenger princess.

she probably has a car but refuses to drive it alone when you’re there cause she thinks she’ll crash it or something

lets you wear her clothes

if she was taller (most likely) she’d have you in all her shirts and stuff cause they look bigger on you

you think you shouldn’t wear anything under cause it hides everything anyways and kate agrees

in reality she just loves the easy access…

total baby when she’s drunk

and super clingy :(

arguments don’t happen often but when they do it ends real fast cause she knows how to calm you down 🥹🥹🥹

if anything though the arguments start cause its about something real stupid

teaches you how to play basketball if it isn’t your sport

can’t cook for SHIET!!!! burns eggs easily or somethin like that cause she can’t bring herself to learn

knows how to bake tho 100%

super adventurous

have you guys seen the pic of her zip lining… like she’s fearless when it comes to that stuff

hits the gym and weight room every fuckin day w you so she can build those arms 🤫

spots you when you think its too hard

KATE IS A MUNCH

ik y’all have seen that pussy eater jaw…

kisses are her thing as well

making out w you is the highlight of her night week day whatever!

initiates it all the time cause she knows you love it too

whines during it too me thinks…

when she needs you to shut up during it i firmly believe that she’ll kiss you to muffle the noises 😩

she isn’t straightforward but when she wants to she’ll make it obvious.

GROANER AND GRUNTERRRRR FOR SURE

cusses all the time

hard breather too

she’ll breathe out a bunch of words that you can barely hear cause of your own noises 💀 but you love hearing them cause you know she’s engaged

her strap game is crazy though i can tell…

feel like she’d sometimes just wear it for fun

she’ll wear it just for the looks and not to use it on you 😭😭

she doesn’t wanna have sex w you for her pleasure b/c during it, everything is about YOUUU

your pleasure >>>>> anything else

soft dom 100% but will also switch sometimes if thats what you’re feeling

especially after games like she loves having sex after cause she knows you’ll do everything for her

FUCKIN LOVES WHEN YOU RIDE HER ITS HER FAVORITE THING EVER

always grabbing your hips really tight when you do and theres always marks afterwards on them

and she likes seeing your face when you’re on top

missionary is her thing

eye contact during sex is important

to her at least

LOVES DIRTY TALKING

degrades you but only when you’re being cocky about something while she fucks the shit outta you

i don’t think she’d be aggressive but she’d be a lil rough when she’s upset

hickeys.

leaves marks EVERYWHEREEE

in the most visible spots so that people can see them when you two are in public

only happens during makeout seshes or when you guys are havin your own time tho

she so talks you through it.

always reassuring and asking if you feel good or not

“is this okay?” “does that hurt?” “it’s okay, baby. i’m right here, i promise” “take your time” lil things like that

praises you hella too

call me cringe or whatever

but she’ll call you a good girl if she has to…

when she eats you out she’s SOOO FOCUSED

quiet the wholeeee time but you can feel her getting all breathy against you

kisses your thighs after you cum so you know she’s still there 😞❤️

aftercare queen

she’s already cleaning you up and getting you a new pair of clothes or running a warm bath for the both of you 🥸

[merakiui]

I was reading through animals facts and found something interesting...

"Octopus lay up between 20,000 to 80,000 eggs at a time"

Σ(°ロ°) Azul!?

I mean, I doubt merfolk would lay that many (since Azul is an only child), but imagine if they did lay even close to that amount.

Like Azul deciding to babytrap Darling, and she's expecting one maybe two babies. Only to pop out like 10 tiny little babies. The shock and horror.

Or a scenerio involving alien or eldritch monster Azul, who wants darling to help him repopulate his species. Unaware that he's gonna knock her up with hundreds of babies at a time due to his biology.

I hope this isn't too weird. This fact just got my breeding kink going for some reason.

>:) back on the egg agenda with tako!!!!

I like to imagine mers can produce a lot of eggs (maybe not nearly as much as 20k and maybe some more than other species) but enough knowing that many of those eggs won't survive. Very few fry return from hatching if it's the open ocean,,, although maybe if he keeps you in captivity and you lay the eggs in a safe space where he can watch over both you and the young.... perhaps more will survive. <3

Alien Azul....... waaaa captured and forced to be the broodmother for such a large clutch. orz so heavily knocked up you can't even escape. Not that you ever could before. Maybe he's the creature who invaded your ship and killed all of your fellow crew members,, something something his home planet is no longer habitable, so he's been searching for a place that will be safe to repopulate and live,, or he was the thing kept locked up in a lab and you just happened to be the unfortunate scientist or janitor or security guard who caught his attention. World is cold and cruel, but human womb is warm and soft and perfect temperature for holding and incubating young. >w< if you're so scared, he supposes he can take on a human form, though he's not sure why that would be of any comfort when humans are so fragile and weak and easy to snap in half. :3c his true form is much better suited to protecting you and the babies.

And with so many tentacles at his disposal he can multitask!! Pleasuring you while cleaning up around the little nest/nook he keeps you in,,, feeding you delicious foods he managed to find and gather while filling you up with more slick to keep the eggs properly comfortable inside you. Restraining your arms and spreading your legs if you try to close them or resist in any way. Stuffing one down your throat to keep you docile and quiet whenever you protest. The babies don't need to hear their mother being a brat and pitching a fit. Tsk tsk. Wiping your tears away when you get so overstimulated from all of the attention and appendages stuffed in your holes.

You may think he's inherently cruel, but he's really a gentle creature at heart(s). :( he just wants to start a family and keep his species extant and maybe you'll come to love and appreciate him one day... he likes you a lot,,, if he didn't, he would've torn you apart by now and the walls would've been spattered with blood and gore. He's trying to make this as easy and painless as possible for you, feeding you aphrodisiac fluid so the process isn't uncomfortable, and he's even going out of his way to prepare you! He just wants his mate to be happy and relaxed. >_<

Maybe your mind just can't keep up with all of this,, the body horror and the actual tentacled horror fawning over you. The absurd amount of eggs crammed in your womb and all of these new sensations you've never felt before. Emotions and hormones are all over the place. You can't believe you actually panicked when you woke up one morning and saw he wasn't curled at your side. You actually want him to touch you, to wrap you up and hold you close, to speak to you in his native tongue and then translate in your language in the best way he can... orz you must be losing your mind to find comfort in the very creature who has made you feel so uncomfortable.

[sirfrogsworth]

Meeting my longtime artist and good friend, Chris, IN REAL LIFE!

So, I hadn't been to a restaurant in over a decade. I can't even remember which restaurant since it was so long ago. But in the past few weeks I've now been to TWO restaurants.

I am becoming a social butterfly. 

And it is exhausting.

But also good.

First I reconnected with my high school best friend, John.

And that went great.

But then the opportunity to see my friend Chris (a.k.a @whosthewhatnow ) came up only a few days later. And this close proximity of social events scared me a bit, but I have been feeling much better since they figured out my heart thing, so I decided to try and do both things even though they were only a few days apart. 

The key to this was strategic resting. As soon as I got home from seeing John, I got in bed and I didn't get out of it until it was time to see Chris. And that was just enough recovery time to pull this off. Typically a short outing requires 2-3 days of rest after. 

I had never met Chris in real life. He has done nearly all of the artwork for my website and comics over the past decade. And he was a main character in my CRAPPRnauts series.

We know each other so well and it is crazy that we've never seen each other with our very own eyeballs.

He is such an amazing artist. He works fast and he adds so many cool extra details that you can stare at his comic panels multiple times and catch a new joke or easter egg each time. He is a dream to work with and my Corg Life series was only successful because he did such a wonderful job bringing Otis to life in comic form. 

So we decided to meet up at a restaurant with his friend Michael and then I was going to take a nice portrait of him after dinner. Chris had never had a professional photo taken of himself and I decided to fix that.

I told him I had a mobile photography setup. Which, in reality, is a trunk full of lights and stands and other various camera gear that I definitely won't need, but bring anyway. It's "mobile" in that it all fits in my car if you are good at Tetris (which I am).

The restaurant was downtown and I had visions of St. Louis's famous Gateway Arch in the background of Chris's portrait. I thought that would be such a cool shot. I could see it in my head and I even dreamed about it.

So I got in my car and headed downtown and my GPS told me to exit at 249B. But I kept looking and I couldn't see the sign for 249B.

This is how much road I had left when I finally was able to see the exit for 249B.

So I ended up taking 249A and going straight to East St. Louis.

Which, if you believe the headlines, is not a place you ever want to be.

Google Maps and I have been having issues lately. They also tried to get me to take the spooky way home that night, but thankfully I actually knew the non-spooky way back from when I used to go to Cardinal games with my parents as a kid.

My short term memory was trashed by shock therapy. And so was a lot of my long term memory. But it finally came through in a pinch and remembered something useful.

I only had to loop around and cross a bridge so I didn't really do anything but touch the edge of East St. Louis. I was mostly concerned about being late for dinner more than its scary reputation. Usually those news stories about a place being "dangerous" are actually just racist and hurtful to people stuck in poverty. I mean, technically my house is in a "dangerous" neighborhood, and we do have trouble with petty crime in some spots, but aside from a few dinged-up mailboxes, I've never felt unsafe in my home.

On the way back to regular St. Louis I could see the Arch on the horizon at sunset and it was kind of magical. And I wasn't able to get a good shot of it, but it sure looked pretty from my point of view. 

My photos kind of remind me of the beginning of movies like Training Day where they are trying to show you gritty, dutch angle shots of the city out of the car window to give you a sense of the location.

As I approached the restaurant I invented a new genre I call "stoplight photography." The sky was orange and the streets of St. Louis were just asking to be photographed. But I wasn't willing to die to get neat photos, so I just took them at every red light.

The big trick was trying to edit the dark area at the top of my windshield out of the photos to make it look like I didn't take these pictures from my car.

After a 15 minute detour through Illinois I arrived at my destination—a Mexican place called Rosalita's. It had a beautiful sign, so I took that literal sign as a metaphorical sign it was a nice place to get a quesadilla. 

Dinner was great. Both signs were right and their quesadilla was very tasty. Chris and I both got one, so we are quesadilla twins. The waitress was one of those "I can remember your order without writing anything down" types. And I am one of those, "I get anxiety when things aren't written down" types. And, to her credit, she did not forget our orders. But she did forget to give us silverware and napkins. So I still feel like my anxiety was valid. 

We told sad stories of the pups we lost. But we also had a lot of fun and laughed and I got to meet Michael who turned out to be an absolute mensch. I sometimes have trouble meeting new people with my social anxiety, but he was very affable and made me feel comfortable with his presence almost right away. He was a fan of Otis and mentioned he still has a Super Otis shirt. I always get choked up hearing that Otis is still loved. Hopefully we get to meet again. 

Dinner ended and it was picture time.

I asked Chris if he wanted the high effort photo or the low effort photo. Either we figure out how to get to the Arch or we find a spot near the restaurant and just take his portrait there. Chris and Michael had a driver because they were coming from a big conference and getting to the Arch would have been complicated. So we decided to go with the low effort option. 

I found a cool shop nearby that had an LED wall that changed to all sorts of different colors. And I thought that would make a neat background and give a colorful edge light on Chris's face. I pulled my car near that spot and started unloading my trunk full of photo gear.

I think Chris and Michael were a little overwhelmed when I started pulling camera gear out of my trunk like a clown pulling an endless handkerchief out of his mouth. But as far as photo setups go, it was actually pretty minimal. 

Light, giant battery, light stand, umbrella, tripod, camera, rolling walker with seat.

My dad's old rollator came in clutch because I wanted to shoot from a low angle and it is hard for me to bend down. In fact, I think I'm going to look into getting an all terrain version so I can do more outdoor photoshoots.

I started shooting in the middle of a downtown sidewalk. And I was super anxious. I could not focus (my brain, not my camera). I was very distracted with all of the people walking by and staring. I was not sure if any of the photos were turning out. I wasn't even sure if they were in focus (my camera, not my brain) because I had not yet had my lens calibrated. But down the street there was a guy with an old school boombox playing random music. His music helped to drown out the ambient noise and gave me some comfort.

I had no clue if the photos were any good, but when I got home and checked them on my computer, I realized I have 12 years of experience and muscle memory built up. I probably should have just trusted myself because the photos all turned out great.

I think Chris can now officially say he has had a professional portrait taken of himself.

This photo has been officially loved by Chris's girlfriend and mother.

There is no greater seal of approval and I am honored.

I was able to comp in any of the colors the wall displayed from other shots in case Chris is feeling a little more green in the future.

A literal rainbow of options.

I also liked this one, though it is a little more "environmental portrait" than regular portrait.

And I got some nice photos of our little group to help us remember the night. 

And I got a bunch of photos of Chris making silly faces like Calvin at his school photoshoot. 

I love this woman's reaction to our little impromptu sidewalk photo shenanigans.

After we said our goodbyes and I gave my friend a hug, I was a little bummed I didn't get to photograph him at the Arch like I had dreamed.

But then I realized I had my own car and it was capable of taking me places. (I actually haven't gotten used to that after not driving for nearly 15 years.)

So I decided to drive a few blocks over to Kiener Plaza—a park with a view of the Arch. 

TO BE CONTINUED...

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Meet the Family 3

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Your boss needs a last-minute favour for the holidays.(petite!reader)

Characters: Lloyd Hansen

Note: I'm feeling very Little Lies about this.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Asking for more or putting ‘part 2?’ is not feedback.

Love you all. You are appreciated and your are worthy. Treat yourself with care. 💖

"So this is the reason you missed Thanksgiving," a butter knife jabs in your direction as you poke at the white turkey meat; this? You look up then at Lloyd as he nearly chokes. 

"Uh, yeah," he coughs behind his fist and swallows, "we were out of the country..." 

"Yes, why would you bother to stay. No use in seeing your mother at the holidays, or the rest of your family," she reproaches. 

"Mom," he groans. 

"For ten years," William adds from his wife's side. "Now you show your face and you look as if you're eating rotten apples." 

"No," Lloyd argues. "It's just... I'm busy and I don't get a lot of time away from work." 

"We all have obligations," Gwenyth argues. 

"Well, I took her away so I could propose," he explains as he presses his fork into the whipped potatoes. "And it worked out perfect, right? Cause now I can bring her to meet everyone." 

Gwenyth hums flatly, "I suppose." She clicks her tongue and takes a healthy gulp of wine. 

"So, Pixie," Lillian drawls from further down, "what do you do for work? Oh let me guess. A librarian?" 

You don't let the suggestion bother you. You don't see it as an insult even if she says it like one. You shake your head. 

"No, I--" you begin and Lloyd stomps your foot so you bite down on your voice.  

"She is a corporate consultant. International corporation," he explains.  

"Oh, wow, sounds busy," Gwenyth remarks. 

"Yes, how will you have time for children?" Lillian challenges. 

"I'm sure they'll find time to make them," Benson chortles over his snifter.  

"Ben, please," William rebukes. 

"We're focusing on the wedding before all that," Lloyd says. 

You peer around as you chew your cheeks in frustration. You're annoyed by how they speak of you as if you're not even there, and so intimately. Yet, you don't have much to say for yourself. This whole facade is tiresome and you really don't care what they think about a made-up job. Or marriage, for that matter. 

"That will be done with quickly," Gwenyth sniffs. "And she will need to quit that job if she wants to do her duty as your wife." 

"I can handle a job and a husband," you blurt out. 

The table quiets as if stunned that you can speak. You blink and Lloyd puts his fork down and touches your arm, "sweet pea--" 

"I highly doubt you'd be marrying him for any other reason than that nest egg promised to him," Lillian scoffs. "You don't need to play a saint with us, darling. Marriage is a transaction in more ways than one; affection, money, sex--" 

"Lilly," William warns and she laughs. 

"Well?" She shrugs. "You do know, the wedding only guarantees a twenty percent payout. He needs an heir to get all of it." She pets her stomach smugly and smiles. "I can assure you it's well worth it. Once you meet Lorelai, you'll see." 

"Oh? Maybe when you meet her, you'll consider being a mother too," Lloyd retorts. 

"Excuse me?" Lillian snarls. "I love my daughter." 

"Of course you so," he sneers. "I'm sure she feels all that love right now as she enjoys her turkey and carrots with the nanny." 

"I can't have her around adults and alcohol. You can't possibly understand," she snaps. "And maybe it's better that you never do. I could never imagine you as a father, especially when you are such a child." 

"Takes one to know one," Lloyd growls. 

"Enough," William barks. "Both of you." 

Ransom laughs loudly at the end of the table. Lloyd shifts and Lillian rolls her eyes. You sigh at your plate. You miss your family. For the first time in years, you truly miss them. 

"What the hell are you laughing at, Hugh? The only reason you're here is because your grandpappy exiled you." 

Linda gasps, "He's not exiled--" 

"Oh, right, of course not, Lin, that's why you're here breaking bread with the peasants. That's what you called us at great grandmother's wake--" 

"Lloyd, watch your mouth," William snarls. "Better yet, shut it." 

Lloyd recoils in his chair and stiffens. His features sharpen then he lowers his chin and picks up his fork. His jaw is stone as he stirs the gravy into his potatoes. You wouldn't call him humbled, more whipped like a dog. These people make you feel something for him you never thought you could; sympathy. 

"I don't care about money that much," you say. "It can't buy respect. Besides, I would never marry a man without a prenup. Whatever Lloyd has will remain his." You push your shoulders back as a yawn tickles in your throat. "At this point, he can keep you lot as well." 

You stand up and take the cloth napkin from your lap. You fold it neatly, "Gwenyth, you can tell whoever cooked dinner that it was delicious. I appreciate you all having me but I'm going to go find a hotel and some peace." You step around the chair and push it into the table, "happy holidays." 

You turn, your insides jittering. What are you doing? Where did that come from? You could say you're tired and not thinking straight, but honestly, you're just so repulsed by these people that your head could explode. They're lucky they only got a a few pieces of shrapnel. 

You march out without looking back. Your cheeks tinge hotly with self-awareness. You've messed it all up. After years of harnessing your emotions under Hansen's thumb, you finally snapped. You blew it all. 

"What she said," another chair scrapes as Lloyd speaks. "Mom, dad, good night." 

You enter the hall and head for the entry way. You hear him beside you. You're still foggy with disbelief. It isn't until you sit to put on your boots that you notice Lloyd. 

"I know, I'm done. Fired." You pull on your leather booties. "I'll take the severance and figure it out." 

"I didn't say so," he says as he grabs a coat from the closet. 

"Um..." 

"You're completely right. We can't stay here. They're all a bunch of pricks and they wonder why I didn't come home for ten years," he pulls on his coat as he speaks. He pushes back his hair then smooths his mustache. "We're better off at the hotel. We'll sleep better there--" 

"We? Lloyd, please. Stay with your family. I need space," you stand and reach past him for your jacket. "Besides, I booked a single queen and it's Christmas Eve." 

"Queen's big enough. You're tiny--" 

"Okay, no, no," you hiss. "It's not happening. Stay--" 

"But I don't want to," he whines. 

"Mr. Hansen," you say. "You're out of your mind." 

"Well, after your blow up, I don't think I'm welcome," he puts his hand on his hip. "So this is your last chance to save your job. You made the mess, you clean it up." 

"Me?" You exclaim. 

He hushes you and step closer, "Pix, you already made a scene, let's not do the encore. I'm gonna grab my bags, alright?" 

"You can't be serious." You say. 

"Hey, I gotta play the loyal husband--" 

"And why exactly is that necessary? Why couldn't you get one of those Tinder girls?" 

"Woah, woah, come on, someone will hear you," he covers your mouth with his hand and you turn your face away with a blech. "Go warm up the car. We'll talk on the ride to the hotel." 

You stare at him. He watches you, as uncertain as you've ever seen him. In the silence, you can hear the din in the other room. 

"Always was such a baby," Lillian laughs venomously. 

"He could've chosen someone without an iron spine," Gwenyth adds. 

You grimace and throw your hands up, "fine, get your things." 

"You're the best," he grabs your shoulders but before he can kiss you, you put your hand up to pinch his nose. He recoils and rubs the tip, "ow." 

"No more of that," you say as you pull your keys out of your pocket. "Thank god I only had one glass of wine." 

You stomp out the front door. The frigid winter air hits you like a bus. Once one even ground, the swirling snow flecks onto your shoulders and hair. Great, now you get to drive in the snow with an unwanted passenger. 

You get in the driver seat and push the ignition. You turn on the heater and the heated seats. At least Hansen pays enough for the add-ons. Still, you’re not sure there’s any compensation equal to what you just went through. 

You look over as the front door opens and closes. Lloyd rolls a giant suitcase with him, another smaller bag strapped on top, and a third in his other hand. You don’t move as you watch him descend the steps, easing the wheels over the edge one-by-one. 

He comes down the long walk and jerks as his loafers slip on the icy pavement. It would be funny if you weren’t so damn exhausted. You steadies himself and continues on. You should get out and help him. You don’t. 

You pop the trunk with the button. He loads in his bags as you check the rear view. He comes around the passenger side and pulls the door open. He lets out an obnoxious ‘brrrr’ as he drops into the seat next to you. You shift gears as he shuts the door. 

“Ugh, I feel so much better getting out of there,” he says as he adjusts the seat, making room for his long legs. 

“Why?” 

“Um, why not? My family is the worst--” 

“No, why did you drag me into this?” You ask as you lean into the wheel and squint over it. The dark, the snow, the unplowed roads, it’s like the universe can’t stop throwing you obstacles. 

“You want the real answer or the nice answer?” He replies. 

“Mr. Hansen,” you growl. 

“Right, I had no other choice.” 

“No other choice?” You repeat. 

“Look, those long-legged beauties back home, they’re fun, but they don’t got much else going on. I needed someone who could play along,” he explains. 

“Play along?” 

“Yeah, I mean, you’re smart so--” 

“I’m smart...” 

“I wouldn’t hire you if you weren’t--” 

“Jeez, wow, Mr. Hansen, thank you so much. You think I’m so smart, so you should know I’m smart enough to know better than to believe you. You think I’m desperate,” you turn slowly onto the next street. “You think I have nothing else going on.” 

“No, that’s not--” he shifts in his seat. 

“It’s exactly what you think,” you huff. “Well, I do. I have a flight in...” you pause and check the time on the dash, “five hours so when we get to the hotel, I’m going to sleep and you’re going to let me. Then I’m going to catch my flight and the curtain can be pulled on this whole theatre.” 

“Your words, not mine. I don’t think you’re desperate.” 

You don’t respond. You’re tired. He just can’t leave things alone. He always has to say something. You wonder if he was truly left to his own thoughts, if his head would combust. 

“I’m actually impressed,” you says, “you held your own.” 

“Sir,” you utter. 

“It was good. Entertaining. I mean, all these years, you never once talked back to me but wow, that was... majestic, really. You didn’t even wait to see my mother’s face. Or my sister’s.” 

“Your family is weird,” you blurt out. “Sorry, uh, I didn’t mean--” 

“I mean, yeah, we probably are but I don’t really have anything to compare it to,” he says. 

You nod. He has a point. Yet, while that horde of entitled brats might explain his personality, it can’t excuse it. 

The hotel’s marquee shines like a beacon as you steer into the lot. You yawn and shut off the engine. You let yourself out and drag your feet around to the trunk. You take out your carry-on as Lloyd hovers at the other side. 

“All of your stuff, out,” you say. “I’m going straight to the airport in the morning. Checkout is ten so as long your gone by then, I don’t care what you do.” 

He’s quiet but he obeys. He takes his bags out and sets them on the ground. He pulls the rolling bag and slings his smallest bag on his shoulder. You snap the trunk shut and turn, shuffling across the icy tarmac. 

You enter through the automatic doors and cross the desolate lobby. You check in with your ID but as you look for your credit card, Lloyd flicks his between his fingers and offers it up to the clerk. 

“It’s on me,” he insists. 

You won’t argue. You really don’t trust him to leave by checkout. As you head for the elevators, he takes a deep breath. He doesn’t speak until you’re behind the sliding doors of the compartment. 

“You know, I’m still your boss so you can’t just order me around,” he says. 

You glance over at him. “Right, won’t happen again, sir.” 

“It could have been worse, you know? I could’ve actually had you come all the way out here just to drop off some gifts. If you think about it, you got a free dinner and some wine--” 

“Yeah, it was a great time,” you say dryly. “Mr. Hansen, I’m too tired to lie any more. Tonight was one of the worst nights of my life so no, I don’t think it could be worse.” 

The doors open and you stride out. You swipe the card at the door corresponding to the number written in the folio and let yourself in. He follows closely, nearly running over your heels with his suitcase. 

You take your bag to the bed and take out the cotton pajamas stuffed inside just for tonight. You bring them with you into the bedroom, doing your best to ignore your guest. Lloyd wanders along the wall and finds his way to the mini fridge. 

You’re in no rush to change, only to get to bed. You trade your dress and stockings for the cotton two-piece and emerge. You shove your bag and clothes beside the night table and slide under the blankets. You pull them up to your shoulders. 

“They got wine, tequila, beer--” 

“I’m going to sleep,” you insist. 

“The alcohol will help.” 

“No, it will make waking up even harder.” 

“After tonight, I think you need a shot.” 

“Mr. Hansen,” you grumble and cover your head. 

“Fine, more for me.” He snickers. 

You’re happy he can’t see the irritation on your face. You might just be better off to let him drink whatever. Eventually, he’ll have to pass out. At least, you can only hope he does. 

[nohoney]

dragon king bakugou who pillages a a nomadic tribe with his men. they cause chaos, taking what they deem valuable and leaving utter destruction until they’re satisfied with the damage. he happens to see the biggest tent that pitched up in the entire encampment and makes his way to it. maybe there’s gold in it, treasure, good wine or ale that will warm his blood, or weapons.

even better, there’s a woman in it.

you’re cowering in the corner when bakugou enters the tent, shouting a battle cry in his language. he slaughters the man that seems to be your husband if the matching circlets are anything to go by, deciding to ignore the fancy and luxurious looking chest and going straight to you. it’s too easy to lift you and put you over his shoulder, you yelping in surprise but seeming to have enough sense to not fight back. bakugou kicks at the head of your husband first before walking through his spilled blood.

he’s directing his men to loot whatever they can use as he approaches his dragon. the beast bows to him, a loyal creature that bakugou had raised since he himself was a child, waiting patiently as he climbs onto the saddle that’s mounted onto the dragon’s back.

“if you fall, i won’t bother to catch you so you better hang on.” bakugou speaks in the common language, one of four he knows and seeing if you understand. you nod your head and hang on tightly, practically holding him in a death grip.

he’s brought you back to his home, pushing you to a gaggle of maidens to get you cleaned up while he takes inventory of what was taken. he expects to hear some update about you; that you’re screaming or fighting back, maybe even crying.

he gets no news aside from the fact that you’re scrubbed clean, you’ve been dressed, and you’re put in his quarters.

it’s a few hours before he finally goes into the privacy in his room. you’re sat by the fireplace, a dragon egg sitting on a bed of warmed coal nearby that you seemed to be looking at before his presence snapped your attention to him. you’re being docile, bowing slightly when he approaches but it makes bakugou be on guard.

you could be one of those witches that plays soft but poisons him in his sleep.

in your lap, the circlet you were wearing before is held delicately in your hands along with some ripped up white cloth that he doesn’t recognize.

“my king,” you speak first, addressing him formally which makes bakugou wary of you, “thank you.”

one of his eyebrows quirks up in question, unsure what he was being thanked for.

“today was my wedding day… i was to be married to a man that was going to make me his fourth wife. i dreaded it for the last year, and i prayed everyday to the gods to intervene in my fate. but nothing happened and i—i was beginning to despair as they prepared me for the ceremony.” you speak softly, your hands delicately tracing the metal of the circlet before petting over the precious jewel at the center of the piece, “but the gods answered my prayers and you saved me!”

a wedding, that explains the amount of inordinate amount of treasure that had been collected.

bakugou is stunned, watching as you stand up to your feet, the circlet and the white cloth dropping to the floor. he realizes now that the cloth you had in your lap was in fact the dress you were wearing before; your wedding dress.

you had been dressed in a robe, colored a rustic orange but with gold details intricately sewn into the fabric. the robe bakugou’s mother had made for him when he had been crowned as the dragon king. you undo the belt of it and let it fall open, the heavy fabric falling off your body as you present yourself to him. the glow of the fire makes your body look heavenly and your eyes shine brightly with an adoration that bakugou had never seen before.

“i want to thank you. please let me thank you for saving me.”

you step to him slowly, kicking aside the circlet and stepping on your wedding dress, your hands delicately touching his shoulders as if testing to see if he would push you away. bakugou doesn’t, still observing you carefully as you invade his space.

“allow me to show you my gratefulness, my king.”

[yaut-jaknowit]

Yautja males x female reader. Reader is sent to the hunting grounds by mistake, she ain't a fighter and has a faint heart, the minute the Yautja ambush her, she faints.

Like, drops to the floor unconscious and the yautja are wondering what to do, like they were expecting a big hunt and she faints, pathetically, not real prey.

Lighthearted

Pairings: T'a'yta, Con'tei, Dai'stbaen (All male Yautjas) x Reader

Word Count: 2993

Summary: When you first come to, this wasn't the sight you last saw. A vast, towering jungle that looked ready to swallow you whole with no remorse. The humidity and heat was a killer as you were forced to move your way through. But it never ended. Like time itself, it seemed to have no beginning nor no ending. When you thought things couldn't get worse, don't count your eggs before they hatch.

Author Note: So, those names may sound familiar. They are from a story that was never publish and I abandoned. It will never be written though but I do love the characters.

Masterlist

Ao3

Pain raked across your body. Your eyes fluttered open only to be blinded by light. A rough, jutting stick pressed into the sore flesh of your back. With a groan, you covered your face with a hand and sat up. The muscles all along the entirety of your back protested at the movement. They screamed as you rested heavily onto your elbows and thighs.

An unrelenting headache pressed behind your eyes while you tried to gather your thoughts. Finally, you opened your eyes and took in the surrounding area.

Lush greens and dense foliage graced your blurry vision. Humidity stuck to you like a second skin, clothes following the same suit. You shuttered at the feeling and sat up higher, as if that would allow you to see better. You were still squinting to allow your pupils to slowly adjust to the sudden change from dark to light.

Once you were able to open your eyes fully and take in the sight, your jaw dropped. This… this wasn’t your bed, your room, let alone your home! Where were you?! You scrambled to your feet only to collapse back down to the ground. Everything ached down to the very bone. A grunt surpassed your lips. Then, you realized, something was secured around your torso.

A harness of sorts was locked into place. You fumbled with the belt for an embarrassing long minute before pulling it off. It crumbled onto the ground at your feet. From there, you slowly pull yourself into a standing position and kept glancing around.

Maybe this was a bad dream; a waking nightmare to be stuck in a jungle. A weird dream in all honesty. You clutched at your head then pinched yourself, ready to wake up in the safety of your room.

The jungle didn’t fade to black. Everything stayed the same. So, you tried again. And again. And again. Nothing changed. All was the same. You furrowed your brows, chest starting to heavy with panic. “No, no, no, no,” you muttered to yourself and began to pace around. Your feet crunched under the dead foliage that covered the ground.

The longer this peristed, you felt dread and doubt fill your lungs. How were you going to do this? Why and how were you out here? Where is out here?! A broken whine sounded from the back of your throat as you plopped back down on the ground. Leaves crunched underneath you as the new weight. You cradled your legs closely and started to rock back and forth.

Once the sun finally touched down to the horizon, sending beautiful oranges and pinks to streak across the sky, you rose again. The darkness felt heavy, as if it attempted to suffocate you in it.

Your heart was already beginning to thunder in your ears but grew worse as the night fell. Your throat was dry, lips on the verge of cracking no matter how many times you wettened them. At this time, you began to wonder through the darkness and explore the new grounds.

Somewhere down the road, something in your gut told you to stop. And you listened. The hairs on the back of your neck rose with the rate of your heartbeat. Your black pupils blown wide to consume any and all light the area might provide. It did little to offer any sight more than five feet in front of you. But you tried to peer through the haze of darkness only to come up empty handed.

Yet, the feeling refused to dissipate. Your hands trembled while clutched close to your chest. You couldn’t tell if this where you were going to die. Was it a predator? A tiger? A leopard?

In the middle of your thoughts, a thundering form dropped down before you. A scream surpasses your lips. Then, nothing.

.

The youngest of the trio had stalked this lone ooman since it first appeared from the dropship. His energy was craze, wild and barely tamed as he watched in rapture for the perfect moment to pounce. Yet, he came to notice the blinding difference between this one and the few he’s hunted before. He huffed before leaping to the next tree.

Down on the ground, the ooman stopped, tense and petrified. Its scent of terror filled the space around him. His upper mandibles crinkling with disgust underneath his plain biomask.

Something was wrong.

Without the proper time to internal discuss his next actions or the consequences afterwards, the male dropped down from the trees before the ooman. An ear shattering screech sounded from the prey then it was cut short.

The creature dropped lifeless to the jungle’s floor. For a moment, he believed he somehow brought upon its death or maybe one of his hunt brothers got to it first. It’s not unlike Dai’stbaen to swoop in at the last second and take the kill.

When he scanned the trees and surrounding area, Con’tei came up empty handed though. Not a large enough heat signature to be the larger male. His focus returned to the crumpled ooman before him. He toed closer to it then knelt down at its side.

A heartbeat, slowed fluttered. The male reached out and cautiously pushed the ooman onto its back. It wasn’t dead. Now, his curiosity got the better of him. He scooped up the limp body and flung it onto his shoulder. From there, he leapt back into the safety of the trees and began his pathing to camp.

Both his older companions were found preparing their tools for the upcoming hunt of the next day. T’a’yta lounged against a log, a knife and whetstone in hand. The nearing elder sharpened the blade with precision. Dai’stbaen, a rival to Con’tei, was consuming meat of sorts while reading on his gauntlet.

Con’tei landed near the group, not silent enough for T’a’yta. Said Yautja shot him a disapproving glance then did a double take. “Con’tei, the hunt isn’t until tomorrow. What have you done?” T’a’yta scolded without needing to get up from his spot on the ground. Con’tao himself pulled his mandibles tight though they were hidden by his biomask.

“Elder, I may have found something interesting with this one,” he explained and strutted over to the duo. The ooman on his shoulder was simple dropped onto the ground in heap, still not awake. Con’tei found this bizarre. “Look at it. It won’t wake. It even fell asleep when I leaped in front of it.”

T’a’yta gave the male an unamusing look, as if Con’tei was the idiot here. “That’s called fainting. Oomans faint but…” the dust colored Yautja finally climbed to his feet and stalked over to Con’tei and the ooman. “To faint from fear?” A question that hung heavy in the air as the elder attempted to examine anything out of sorts with the prey. He came up empty handed.

The elder huffed and looked at Con’tei. “This-“ a groan brought his moving mandibles to a stop. T’a’yta’s bright eyes snapped down to find the ooman beginning to move, squirming around in their spot. He didn’t move though. He stayed knelt down besides it and watched as it woke up groggily.

.

Confused, your eyes fluttered open to find the night sky shining down on you. You sat up, clutching at your head for a moment then scanned the area.

A scream tore at your throat. A massive and lumbering form was sitting on its haunches at your side. You scrambled away only to knock into something warm. Your head whipped up to a humanoid creature leaning over you, hands on its hips. Metal covered its face, leaving you only to stare in terror at a blank expression.

Petrified at the two creatures surrounding you, you curled up into a protective ball and cried. Your whole body shook with each sob that echoed back at you. Pathetic, meek but you didn’t care. All you care about in the moment was if this was how you died.

When no harm came to you for the first minute, you timidly pulled your head free and submissively looked at the towering creatures. The orange one, lean and smaller than the other one, still stood where you last saw it. The other one had picked himself and gazed down at you with little care.

“Are you… are you going to hurt me?” For whatever reason you could scrounge up in that shaken brain of yours, you asked them a question. It was stupid in the moment but you hadn’t realize why it would be.

The figure closest to you huffed, glancing at the only other like it that you could see, then shook its large head.

Your whole body jolted at the deep grunts and clicks coming from the larger one. It must be communicating with the one nearest to you. Well, that was your first thought until more of the same sounds, different range voiced from outside the edges of your vision. You accidentally knocked into its shins yet it didn’t react.

From the shadows, this hunkering giant, taller than the dust colored one marched out, hands balled into fists. You were frozen in place. No matter how loud your mind screamed for you to move, you couldn’t.

The newest one, a dark color, possibly a red, seemed to argue with the lighter one. At this time, you decided to give them color coordinating names. Dust, Red, and Orange. At least, you think it was orange. With the lack of light, it was hard to tell. You made do with what was given.

Red growled at Dust and pointed harshly at you, body tense. Dust, on the other hand, stood there with little movement besides its shoulders moving with each breath. When Red realize it wasn’t getting anywhere with Dust, it stomp over to us. You scrambled back and knocked into Orange’s legs again. A minute part of you prayed it would protect you.

A harsh snarl tore from Dust’s throat that had Red stopped in his spot. It clicked in your head who was the leader amongst them. Red whipped around and began to berate to Dust that had to do with you.

In the midst of the commotion, Orange knelt down behind you and patted your head. You yelped but the sound didn’t interfere with the two arguing creatures. It reached towards the metal mask that covered it face and stopped where its mouth would be. A sharpened claw tapped at its mouth area. All you could do was furrow your brows.

The creature finally realize you weren’t following along in its game of charades and called out to the disputing duo. Both whipped their heads at Orange and growled. Orange only huffed and motioned towards you yet speaking in the same language. One you didn’t understand. Dust rolled its eyes before strolling over to the two of you and kneeling a respectful distance away. You stayed semi pressed against Orange, finding little comfort in it.

“Ooman-“ you felt yourself about to faint again but somehow kept it together. “You are not supposed to be here,” it spoke a very deep, vibrating voice that was hard to even understand.

Despite the terror that filled your veins, you timidly looked at it in those bright eyes that nearly glowed in the darkness. “Where, where is here-here?” you sputtered and clutched both hands tightly to your chest.

Dust held up its arm, bent at the elbow, and pressed a button on the metal gauntlet that hugged its forearm. As if out of a sci-fi movie, a hologram floated inches above the gauntlet. It was of a planet or sorts. With its free hand, it pointed at the sphere. “Here. On a planet. Not Earth.” It struggled to say the word ‘earth’ which Orange snickered out. Dust just glared at it.

This had you sitting up straighter and slightly leaning closer to Dust. “What?!” you shouted at the top of your lungs then slapped a hand over your loudmouth. “Sorry, sorry.” You took a deep breath then focused on Dust. “Where am I? And, and how did I get here?” Your voice took a turn towards silence as you tried not to sob your heart out.

Red clicked its mandibles together and gazed at Dust with a harsh look. All Dust did was nothing to Red. “You were an accident. You are not what we hunt. It would be pointless to kill you, not a trophy worthy to take,” it explained nonchalantly. Its body was at ease, eyes partially hooded and each blink slow.

Your head swirled with the new information, chest beginning to heave once more with rapid breaths. Red scoffed and muttered something out loud. Neither creature reacted to it. “Kill me?” That was mainly stuck in your head now. Kill? “What is going on?!” you snapped at them, acting out for a fleeting moment before curling up again and leaning against Orange’s shins without noticing.

The creature before you sighed and shook its bowed head then returned its vision back on you. “We are hunters. You are prey. Though, not worthy prey. We won’t kill you. There must have been a mix-up and they nabbed you instead.”

Dust motioned around him. “This planet is a game reserve where we capture and drop off prey we see as worthy enough to hunt. We hunt said prey. This includes a few ooman as yourself.”

The pieces to the puzzle were finally put together but the order wasn’t something you enjoyed. Especially when it meant you weren’t in your place nor your bed, somewhere not your home. “Wait! Does that mean you’re aliens?” you asked suddenly. Red rolled its eyes and glared at you.

“Yes, primitively,” Dust answered then stood up. “Since we have no reason to hunt you nor can we return you back home, you are now… what that called? Stuck between a rock and a hard place?” Orange began to converse in what must be their language. Dust raised a singular brow at Orange. Red spat out. “Tei does have a point. We are at fault.”

Red’s mandibles flared out with roar as he faced off Dust. You shoved yourself further against Orange for protection at the sight. Orange seemed to snicker and patted your head again. This must be a normal occurrence if Orange was at ease at the sight.

Neither made move or went for the other’s throat. Thankfully. You didn’t know if you would survive the brawl if it had made its way over to you.

A growl echoed from Red’s chest before about-facing and marching away into the darkness. You whimpered and stayed exactly where you were until a dust colored hand entered your vision. “Come along, little ooman. You are now under our supervision due to this accident,” Dust spoke calmly and tugged you to your feet after you took his offer.

“I have not been around a ooman for quite some time. You will have to remind me your dietary requirements.” Dust left your personal space to roost in a spot on the ground and against a fallen log. It picked up a knife and some sort of stone.

You swallowed and licked at your cracking lips. Dietary requirements. These things must eat differently. “Well, um, meat is a good start. Vegetables are good as well. Um… Water, I guess.” It felt strange to list these things to it but if it kept you alive, that’s all that mattered.   “But… I do have a question if that’s okay.”

Dust shrugged. Confused, you decided to take your chance. “What are you guys? And what about names?” If you were to be around these aliens, you wanted to know the basics. Like their names.

Orange sprung up from behind you to stand before you and grabbed at your shoulders. The alien whipped its head to look at Dust and sprout out some nonsense by the sounds of it. Dust used a hand to slow down Orange’s speech before letting it continue.

At the end, Dust shook its large head. “He wants to tell you our names but he hasn’t even learned the basics of ooman language,” Dust explained the situation. “As for our names, I guess that is something we can relent since it’s our fault you are here.” He cleared his throat then continued. “I am called T’a’yta. The excited youngling is Con’tei. The grump who had just walked off is Dai’stbaen. Don’t be frightened by him. He’s just grumpy.”

T'a’yta. Con’tei. Dai’stbaen. The first two were easier to remember and hopefully pronounce. But the last one, it threw you into a twist and a growing headache. “Thank you,” you spoke of your appreciation to… T’a’yta. The alien dipped his head.

“For food, Con’tei can retrieve it for you. We have a database on what is safe for oomans on this planet.” God, you hadn’t even thought about that! Different planet meant different foods.

“Lastly, water.” T’a’yta held up a pouch that looked to be made from the skin of an animal to you. “It is clean, I promise. I know how oomans are frail when it comes to bacteria or something along those lines.”

Timidly, you tip-toed your way over to him and took the bag from him. It took you a moment to figure out how to untie the knot around the tip and sip from it. Once finished you handed it back to him then stood there awkwardly for a moment.

“Find a place and rest,” T’a’yta spoke up while he worked on sharpening his knife. You jumped slightly at his words then nodded to yourself.

Through the darkness, you found a comfortable spot a little ways away from the last remaining alien. He paid no attention to you while you sat down and hugged your knees closely. A deep breath filled your lungs but didn’t ease any of the tension that constricted your body. This had become your new life.