#yesterday was rough so the extra sleep was very much needed

[solpng]

good evening friends <3 happy valentine's dayy <333

[rederiswrites]

I feel so drained. It's been such a week. The same pain we're all feeling, of course, with a few extra things thrown in for fun. Animal death to follow, if you don't want to deal with that.

The kids all adapted readily to a classroom environment, despite my worry, and did so well so calmly that I'm very proud and much reassured. It was still four plus hours away from the house every day. They all helped keep the chores done, so the drain was mainly psychological. But I don't like driving, and sorry everyone, I don't like being in town. The seagulls I could hear from my parked car the fourth day were almost hilariously welcome. Parking lot rats, but that reminder that nature exists was a balm to my soul.

Kiki died yesterday. He'd been in rough shape, but still enjoying life. We knew it was a matter of time til something critical failed, and that there wasn't anything likely to help him short of truly major expensive things that still might well not help. Then he declined rapidly this week. I held him for the last three hours. He cried terribly if he wasn't held, and Phantom had to hold him while I got dressed, so at least we know being held was a comfort to him. It was an expected death, and timely in its way, but when at last he didn't draw another breath, I was so, so tired.

I put him where Ciri could check him out and understand, however her mind understands these things. I didn't think to do that when Hrothgar died, and Ciri went around the house meowing for him for a week. It seems to have worked, because she's quiet today. After he died, I went straight to bed and slept til it was time to leave for class, and then stayed parked next to the class and slept in the car.

When I woke up, the car wouldn't start. Left something on, I guess, though I couldn't figure out what. Jacob was on his way home, but turned around, and the car jumped and started up just fine. In fact, before @mythicalfungi0-0 's dad showed to collect her, so before we would have left anyhow. So again, nothing but a psychological drain, really.

On the way home, we listened to music--Phantom has some great tunes fit to the times that I'll have to share with you. After a period of silence, I said, "OH! We need crocus bulbs." And Phantom said, "Oh! Right!" to the bewilderment of the Borrowed Girl. Crocuses, to go on Kiki's grave, next to Hrothgar's by the pond. It lies next to a large rock projecting from the ground. Someday we'll etch their names into the stone. I've ordered them, in a different color than the ones on Hrothgar's, so that we can think of both of them when they bloom.

I got a good night's sleep last night. Spoke to my friend who fosters kittens this morning. Today, I will keep planting flowers. I think the future will have flowers.

[blackypanther9]

Can't get enough - William Afton x Male!Reader

WARNING!: Smut, multiple orgasms, BDSM, Praise kink, bondage, use of butt plug, use of something close to a milking machine, Anal sex, soft and rough sex, degradation, marking, spanking, punishment, impregnation AND MORE ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED !!!

William zoomed around in Fredbear’s Family Diner, like it was his last day on earth. He zoomed from the parts and service room, to the backstage room, quickly, but carefully checked on Fredbear and Springbonnie, fixed what had to be fixed and zoomed to the kitchen to see if they are all working.

He had to yell at two of the newer waiters he accepted in, but that was pretty much it. Then he zoomed into his office and quickly read through his huge stack of papers, filled and signed them, gave them to Henry and then zoomed out of the Pizzeria.

He was home ten minutes BEFORE M/n and the kids got home. The smell of spinach hit his nose and his stomach rumbled. He didn’t even take his time to eat what M/n made him for lunch… He hurried so much that he totally forgot about it in his bag, that he came back home with.

William set the table with plates, silverware and the two pots that had spinach and potatoes in them, already cooked and still steaming hot. He got out a big plate, pan, butter and eggs and started to fry them.

As M/n came home with the kids the smell of fried eggs and the sound of sizzling greeted him and the two children.

“Seems like your Dad is already back home today.”, M/n informed the two boys.

Evan smiled and ran into the kitchen.

“PAPA !”, he yelled happily.

“I hope you don’t screw him too hard tonight…”, Michael muttered to M/n.

M/n chuckled and grabbed Mike by the arm softly.

“Do me a favor, Mikey.”

“What is my payment if I do ?”, Mike asked instantly.

M/n smirked.

“I will help you to get together with your little crush~”

Michael blushed a small red hue.

“How do you know ?”

“It is very obvious. You lock your door a lot and I can hear you in there. I am not stupid Mike.”

He blushed redder.

“Pervert…”

“Sorry that you always do ‘it’ after school, before you have even eaten. It is my job to feed you after all. Then get used to doing ‘it’ after Lunch. Then you have all day to yourself.”, M/n deadpanned.

Mike looked away.

“Dad will be so pissed…”

“I doubt it. When you two DO get together, take it slow and easy and when you ever come to THAT activity…ask her if she is on the pill and wear for extra safety a condom. As long as you don’t get anyone pregnant, Willy won’t mind. He just doesn’t want you to be a Father until you are at least 20 years old.”

Mike blushed when M/n told him that but appreciated it.

“Okay…what do you want me to do ?”, the boy asked.

“Go with Evan to his friend’s house and stay there for a few hours. After that you can ask Henry if you can sleep over at his place with Evan. We will be…having a very active day today. I promised your Father to take care of him today. He needs it.”

Michael made a face of understanding.

“Okay, you got it Papa. I will take care of it.”

“Thank you. And no bullying. If I find out you bullied your little Brother the deal will be off.”

“I promise to behave.”

With that Mike left to his room and changed his clothes, then washed his hands and came back to the dining room and gave his Father a visit.

“Hello Father.”, he greeted.

“Hello Mikey.”, William greeted back.

“Is lunch almost done ?”

William hummed.

“Just this one left, then I’m done cooking.”

Mike nodded and went to the Dining room. M/n entered next and hugged William from behind around his waist.

“Hello, Darling~”, M/n purred.

William already was getting aroused, but tried to keep it together.

“Hello, Love.”, he greeted back.

M/n put his head on William’s left shoulder and kissed his neck.

“You cooking the eggs for me ?”

William nodded.

“Already finished your work ? Usually you take almost forever to come back home.”

William nodded.

“I did finish. It wasn’t much today. I overworked yesterday.”

M/n tutted.

“How many times did I tell you to stop overworking ?”, he asked.

William swallowed hard. Shit that slipped out.

“A lot...Sorry, M/n...”

“What’s my name, Bunny ?”, M/n asked darkly.

Every time William did something he was not supposed to he was NOT allowed to call M/n by his actual name, nor his pet names. William swallowed harshly.

“I’m sorry, Master...”, William mewled out.

“Good bunny.”

M/n gave William a kiss on his pulse point on his neck, which made him whimper softly. M/n then parted from William and smacked his ass. William yelped softly.

“Just so you know, you will be punished for overworking again.”, M/n whispered darkly then left.

William whimpered softly. He HATED being punished by M/n, but he knew that he deserved it.

-Time skip-

After lunch Mike and Evan left the house and M/n told William to undress himself, as soon as the kids were out.

So there William stood now. Naked. On the kitchen sink. He awaited M/n’s next order.

“You will wash these dirty dishes with your own hands. You are NOT allowed to make any noise, to talk or to move around. All I want you to move are your arms by cleaning and drying the dishes. You hear me ?”, M/n asked.

William let out a whine, but nodded.

“Good bunny. Now get to work.”

And that William did. He turned around and started to fill the sink with hot water, got his sponge ready and put on some cleaning gloves. Then he started with a plate.

M/n was right behind William, hugging him from behind, kissing his shoulders, neck and back. It was hard to not make any noise. William was always noisy and loud, but he had to control himself.

After the second plate was clean, M/n started to grope William’s ass, which made him buck into it, out of instinct.

SLAP !

William yelped and straightened up.

“I told you to stay still and only are allowed to move your arms, William.”, M/n said darkly.

“S-sorry, Master ! It was instinct !”

SLAP !

“Ouch !”

“I also said no talking and noise making. Bad boy.”, M/n said disappointed.

William got tears in his eyes. He doesn’t want to be a bad boy ! He only wants to be a good bunny for his Master. He stayed silent and continued to wash the dishes. M/n knew how much William hated being called by his name and being called a bad boy, by punishments and Sex. He knew what effect it had on him. But otherwise William will never learn to obey.

After the fourth plate was clean, M/n gave William’s neck a small love bite. William stiffened up slightly and tried to keep his moan in. When M/n parted from his neck again he kissed his shoulder and smiled softly.

“Such a good bunny. I think now you deserve a reward. You are allowed to make noise and to talk.”

“Th-thank you, Master.”

“Of course, my bunny. Now finish up, baby.”

William cleaned the knives and forks quickly, then he dried everything up, while he moaned as M/n groped his ass and played with his hard cock. When he was finished M/n stepped away, leaving William disappointed and on the edge of orgasm.

“You know what I found in your bag ?”, M/n asked.

William shook his head.

“You didn’t eat the food I made you.”

His eyes went wide in shock.

“I-I can explain ! I was running around and hurrying to get everything done to come home as fast as possible ! I forgot to eat it, I’m sorry !”

“You KNOW that I hate it when you don’t eat and overwork.”, M/n growled.

“I did eat lunch and breakfast ! I’m fine !”, William tried to persuade.

“William Afton, I always check your lunch box and I don’t care if you ate with us. The point is that you skipped your lunch break, with that you didn’t eat and rather overworked to get here faster. You KNOW that I always look out for your health. You are skinny enough. On your chest I can see your ribcage when you stand straight. You need to eat and sleep more.”

William looked down in shame. He knew all of that, but it is hard to not overwork for more money to give his kids everything they want.

“Wash your hands and go to our bedroom. You have one minute to do so. Do NOT disappoint me.”

William nodded, tore off the gloves and quickly ran off.

‘This man... This isn’t the first time he skipped his lunch break... What am I going to do with him ? If he continues like this, he will die at some point...’

As M/n was in the bedroom, William was already there, standing in the bedroom, hands clasped together in front of him, looking down at the floor. M/n sat down on the bed, looking at William deep in thoughts, then he smiled.

“Come here, William.”, he commanded.

He swallowed and did as told. M/n grabbed him and pulled William over his lap, making him yelp in shock. There he was now, over M/n’s lap, ass vulnerable. M/n rubbed his ass gently, making William whine softly, but he stayed still.

“Do you know what is happening ?”, M/n asked.

“Y-yes...”

“Do you know why it is happening ?”

“B-because I didn’t take proper care of myself again.”

“How many do you think you will get ?”

“A-at least 20....”

M/n looked at William and slapped his ass once. He yelped.

“Why so abusive, hmm ? I never gave you 20 spanks before.”

“B-because you think that it’s too little ?”

M/n tutted.

“You will get 12 spanks and you will count them. If you count wrong, we start anew.”

William whimpered and nodded. M/n started the punishment.

SPANK !

“O-one.”, William hissed.

It had been a while since M/n spanked him, and it hurt. It wasn’t as playful as it was in the Diner...

SPANK ! SPANK !

“Two, three !”, William yelled.

And on and on it went. At the 10th spank William was sobbing.

SPANK !

“Eleven !”, he screamed.

SPANK !

“T-twelve !”

M/n rubbed William’s red ass softly and kissed his shoulder.

“Good bunny. Such a good bunny for me.”, M/n praised.

William was still sobbing, but happy that he was M/n’s good bunny. His good, obedient, slutty bunny.

“Now get off my lap, bunny.”

William did as told and M/n got up.

“Today we are doing something different, but I’m sure you will love it. For that I need you to kneel, arms behind your back and eyes closed, you understand ?”

William nodded and got on the floor, following M/n’s instructions.

“Good bunny.”

M/n wiped away William’s tears and then got out a rope from the closet, with a blindfold. William was never tied up before, but he voiced it that he really wanted it sometimes. M/n went behind William, tying up his arms nicely. William’s breathing got faster, he got excited. Then M/n put the blindfold on him and undressed himself.

He stood naked in front of William, hard cock in hand.

“Be a good slut and open your mouth wide~”

William did as asked and moaned as he felt M/n’s cock entering his mouth. He relaxed his jaw and throat, not knowing what M/n will do. He can be very random by a blowjob. He felt M/n grab his hair, then he pulled his head closer, making him take more of his cock. To help William have all of his cock in his mouth, he bucked his hips the rest of the way in, making William instantly deep throat him.

“Such a good slutty bunny~ Already expected me to be rough~”

William’s cock twitched at the praise. Fuck he wanted M/n to mess him up in the head so bad today. Make him only remember the shape of M/n’s cock inside his ass and make him only feel his cum inside him.

‘Fucking hell, I feel like a submissive, breed able slut...’, William thought to himself.

M/n went rough and fast in William’s throat, only giving him seconds to catch some air in his lungs and he made him choke a few times. But it was nothing William couldn’t handle and get under control quickly. Even though M/n liked it when William was choking on his cock.

“Such a good slut you are~ Taking all of me in so well~”, M/n praised and stroked William’s hair.

He choked out a moan at that, his cock twitching again. M/n was close and he smiled down at William, who couldn’t see.

“I’m gonna cum, baby~ Do Master a favor and drink your milk, will you~?”, M/n purred out.

His bunny’s cock twitched again. M/n pulled William all the way down on his cock, making his nose hit his pubic bone. William stayed still and M/n moaned as he came, rope after rope, down William’s throat. William could feel how his Lover’s cum went down his throat.

‘Fuck....I want more....’

As M/n was finished, he pulled his cock out of his bunny’s mouth. It was still rock hard. He went behind William, helped him to stand up, got him on the bed, put him in a kneeling position and pushed him down by his back, making him press his left cheek into the sheets.

M/n had free access to William’s entrance now and he growled possessively, as he saw that some of his cum, was out from their love making in Fredbear’s. Oh, he couldn’t let Willy get away with that. He lubed his fingers up with his own saliva and then pressed them inside, to see if his bunny’s hole tightened at all.

“Ah~”

“You are still open wide and ready for me, bunny~ What a slutty little thing I own~”

William whined at M/n’s dirty talk and tried to get more friction from his fingers, which didn’t work, because M/n already pulled them out again. M/n took his cock in his hand and positioned himself at his Lover’s hole. Then he pushed in slowly. They were in no rush, after all.

“Ah~! Mmmm~!”

“What a tight little cunt you have~ No matter how many times I fuck the shape of my cock into you, you are tight again like a virgin, when I enter again~”

William wiggled his hips, whimpering submissively.

“P-please, hurry~ I-I really n-need it rough today, Master~”

“Oh bunny~ We have all day and night to spend~ When I’m done with you, you won’t even remember Springbonnie’s name~”

“Bold statement....Prove it to me~”

M/n smirked darkly and then was sheathed all the way in, tickling his bunny’s prostate softly. He grabbed his submissive Lover’s hips and then moved slowly in and out of William. His bunny didn’t expect that, hoped he would be fast and rough, but his Master seemed to have other ideas.

It was sensual and careful at first, but then, every time M/n pushed back in slowly, he hit William’s prostate harshly.

“Ah~! Yes~! Mmmnnn~! Fuck~!”

Every time M/n hit his bunny’s prostate harshly, he moaned and babbled something. William never thought that he could get close to cuming by slow and sensual Sex. You learn something new every day. M/n got William to cum after 30 minutes of sensual, slow Sex, which surprised his bunny greatly.

His cum stained the sheets and he felt utter bliss and happiness. M/n pulled out after he came inside his bunny’s cunt, which made William whine.

“Why did you pull out ? Come back... Please...”, William begged.

“Just a moment, my Love.”, M/n assured.

He pulled something out of the drawer that was behind the bedroom door. It was kind of like a milking machine. Just that it didn’t mile his bunny’s cock, M/n didn’t need that, he can make his bunny cum all day and night, but in order to have clean sheets, he crafted a little something, so the cum wouldn’t go to waste. All the cum is bunny will waste today and tonight, will be stored in a tank inside the little machine.

He came back to William’s side and took his oversensitive cock into his hands.

“Ah~! What are you doing~?! Mmmnnn~!”

“Make sure that your cum won’t be wasted for nothing~ Now hold still. Be a good bunny, for Master~”, M/n answered.

William tried very hard to stay still, moaning softly, while M/n put the device on his cock and fastened it around him. When he was done he got back up and gave his bunny a gentle, filled with love, kiss. William kissed back softly, their tongues playing with each other.

“Such a good bunny you are for me~”, M/n praised as they parted from their kiss.

William was drooling slightly, but smiled softly with a red hue on his cheeks. Then M/n went back behind him and entered his Lover’s hole again. William moaned loudly as he was back inside.

M/n gave his bunny another round of slow, passion filled love making. He noticed how nuts it made William. He loved it so much, but he wanted so much more at the moment. M/n smirked at his dirty bunny.

“You are such a greedy little slut, aren’t you, bunny~?”

“Y-yes~! Ah~! Want more~! P-please~!”

M/n hit his Lover’s prostate harder than before and William came screaming, while M/n held his hips in place and came too, moaning. He saw how his bunny’s cum went into the machine with the tank and it made him even more aroused.

He grabbed William’s hips and pushed in deeper to fill him better, which made his bunny moan louder than he did before, but he stayed obedient and let M/n do what he wanted. All William wanted was to fuck himself on his Master’s cock, but he knew he should NEVER interrupt the process of his Master filling his slutty, needy hole up.

As M/n finished he pulled out slightly and started to fuck William faster and rougher than before.  The over stimulated Afton could only moan louder and beg for M/n to give him more. William’s cock still leaked some cum and it just got to M/n’s head, that he leaned down and bit William’s shoulder, drawing blood.

“AH~! MASTER~!”

William came again, his hole tightened up nicely and M/n forced his cock back in all the way, to fill his needy bunny’s cunt again. It only made William cum harder, as he felt M/n’s cum gushing deep inside him, marking him as his.

William felt boneless, luckily he didn’t have to hold himself up, otherwise he would have slumped on the bed now, just flopping on his chest and not able to move. M/n softly rocked his hips back and forth while his cock happily twitched and pumped cum into his bunny’s greedy hole. Then he let go of William’s shoulder and kissed the new mark.

“Such a good bunny~ You’re so good~ My beautiful, sweet, slutty bunny~”

William whined softly.

“C-can’t...move...”, William got out from his high.

“Don’t worry, baby, you don’t have to move.”, M/n whispered and kissed William’s neck.

He pulled out of his bunny, got up, picked William up by the front and went to the wall on their left from the bedroom. He pressed his Lover’s back against it and positioned his legs, holding them with one hand and the other was lining his cock up with William’s hole. He wasted no time in pushing inside.

“AH~!”

M/n started to move fast and rough, slamming William into the wall.

“OH FUCK~! OH YES~! MORE~! AH~! HAH~!”

William was drooling, unable to swallow much, from all his moaning. M/n gave him a rough kiss, which William replied to submissively. M/n swallowed all of his bunny’s moans. They were all just for him after all. Then he decided to take off William’s blindfold and he was in awe.

His baby bunny was in utter fucked out bliss. His eyes were unfocused and rolled up. It looked like he looked at the ceiling, but he probably didn’t. His eyes weren’t centered anymore, they were more looking to the bridge of his nose.

“Look how far gone you are in the pleasure, I can give you, bunny~”, M/n purred.

“AH~! HAH~! HA~!”

“Such a good cumslut for Master, aren’t you~?”

“YES~! HAH~! JUST FOR MASTER~!”

M/n fucked into him faster and William soon came screaming again, his own cum filling the tank further, while M/n pushed in all the way and gently rocked his hips against William as he filled him with another load of his.

He then carried him back to bed and laid him down on his back, put his bunny’s legs onto his shoulders, positioned himself again and entered him again. William screamed loudly in bliss. M/n slammed into his bunny’s prostate now, no mercy left and he leaned down to suck, nibble and bite his bunny’s over sensitive nipples. William struggled a bit around and moaned louder than he already did, screaming his lungs out in bliss.

M/n marked his bunny’s chest up nicely, before he made William cum again with him. As M/n looked down, he started to smile and feel more possessive than he already felt. He came so much inside his baby bunny, that he had a small tummy showing.

‘Fuck...I want to make it rounder ~ Fuck, why can’t you have my baby ?’

M/n continued to fill William and make his bunny cum. When William was too exhausted to still be horny, they stopped. William had a big round belly, full of cum and William came so much that he filled the whole tank. M/n already had some plans with it. But before he put everything away and left, he untied his bunny’s arms, got out a butt plug and plugged William’s hole up, which made him whimper.

“So full...”, he whined softly.

“Tomorrow you can shower and let it all out, tonight I want all of it to stay where it belongs. And it belongs into your slutty, bunny cunt. I didn’t rabbit with you for nothing, baby.”

William moaned at that and then passed out. He knew what M/n meant with ‘rabbit’. He often said rabbiting when William was horny and couldn’t get enough. Apparently that is what rabbits mating means. And because William likes to be called bunny, he has to live with the term rabbiting.

M/n cleaned everything up while William rested and brought the filled tank into the basement.

‘Tomorrow I can start with my work.’

Just what was M/n up to ?

He went back to William’s bedroom and laid down too, covering them with the blanket, he redressed, and then held William possessively.

‘Mine.’

-The next day-

William woke up with an aching body. He carefully got up and out of M/n’s arms, then went into the shower and showered. He carefully pulled out the plug, he moaned and got hard as all the cum inside him, came out and was washed away by the drain. He was sad that it all left, but it had to go. He cleaned the plug and then himself.

When he was finished he came back out of the shower and looked at the mirror. He sighed and smiled happily as he saw all the love bites and marks, M/n left on his skin. Never in a million years will he cover these up. In the middle of all their love making, M/n even marked William’s thighs as his. He left the bathroom and saw that M/n was missing from bed.

Then he felt two arms wrap around him.

“Morning my Love.”, M/n greeted huskily.

“Good morning, Dear.”

William gasped softly as M/n nibbled on his neck again and fondled his still hard cock.

“What made you excited again, hmm ?”, he asked his bunny.

“All of your cum that left. It was so much... I guess it just aroused me again.”

M/n softly bit William’s neck, his right arm pressed him tightly to M/n’s chest, while the other started to jerk his bunny’s cock off.

“A-ah~!”

“Relax, baby bunny~ Let me make it go away~”, M/n said with a seductive voice.

William leaned against his Master and let him jerk him off. He bucked his hips from time to time and moaned softly, which got louder the closer he got to his orgasm. Soon he came screaming, but his cock didn’t soften.

“Oh oh~ I think your body wants me to pleasure it some more~”, M/n purred.

William blushed a deep shade of red, but smiled. M/n made William turn around and they started to make out, while his Master led his bunny back to the bed, where they had another three rounds of love making.

The kids came back with Henry as they finished and William had to dress up quickly, to run to the door. He opened it and let the kids inside, thanking Henry that he took care of them. Michael made a direct line to his Father’s bedroom and entered, spotting M/n on the bed, dressed.

“So ? How hard did you go ?”

M/n looked at Michael.

“Your dad can be wild, that is all I’m going to say.”, M/n teased.

Michael blushed and shook his head.

“Is he less stressed now ?”

“I’m sure he is not at all stressed, Mike. Why ?”

“Because I forgot to do my school project and now I need his help. I am not entirely done with my small Animatronic and I have to be done by tomorrow. I skipped school today and said that my Brother was ill and my Dad is a single parent and not home.”

“Mkay. Ask your Dad then. He is totally relaxed. And I will help you soon with your own little crush~”

Mike blushed slightly, but smiled.

“Thank you, Papa.”

“No problem, now shoo.”

With that Mike left.

‘This kid...’, M/n thought amused.

-Two weeks later-

William was very sick. He vomited a lot and ate more than usual. Something was wrong with him and he reported himself sick.

M/n called the doctor, but he had a sneaking suspicion what it was. You see, William stole some files about himself from his parents, before he ran away. He probably never read them, but there stood some very...interesting things in it. Mostly with what he was all born.

The doctor arrived and checked up on William. The older man was in shock as he ran the tests twice already and they had the same results.

“What do I have, Sir ?”, William asked worried.

“Mr. Afton...did you know that you were one of the 4% of men that can get impregnated ?”, the doctor asked carefully.

William’s eyes went wide.

“What ? No I had no idea. Such things are possible ?”, he asked in shock.

“Yes. Congratulations, Sir. You are pregnant.”

M/n stood with William in the room and smiled. He did his job right this time. He expected William to be in horror, but he just smiled and patted his tummy.

“Wow, lucky me...”

“You are very lucky indeed, Sir.”

Then his eyes flashed in realization and he panicked.

“Wait ! How would they come out by birth ?! Oh shoot !”, William panicked.

“Don’t worry, Mr. Afton. We had such a case once already. We know what to do.”

“Please tell me that I won’t lose this ability after I gave birth.”

“You won’t. I assure you, nothing will go wrong.”

William turned and looked at M/n with happiness.

“My Love, we finally have what we wanted.”

“Darling, we already have it, I just wanted the family to get bigger.”, M/n replied with a soft smile.

“So you...weren’t lying when you said you accept Mike, Evan and Liz ?”

“Of course I wasn’t lying, Darling. I love you all and I will love our new child too.”

The end ?

Masterlist HERE !

Finally I have it finished ! It took me FOREVER ! I hope you liked it. ^^

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #364

After writing yesterday's letter to you, I managed to find my 7th set of braces. I had not, in fact, taken them out when I ate. I took them out for a different (but nonetheless important!) reason, and for that reason, I ended up leaving them in a strange place and promptly forgetting about them (because what is this “object permanence” of which y'all mortals speak???).

But I have them now! So I took out the 8th set and put the 7th back in, much to the relief of the structure of my skull, I'm sure! So we're back on track for the 8th set being installed into my face on the day I write my 371st letter to you! Yay!

Sometime after going to sleep, poor J woke in the night to vomit. V, O, and I didn't get sick, so we can only assume that it was something that J ate somewhere else. He was recently given leftover restaurant food, and he recently ate at a relatively low-quality pizza chain. It can take up to 72 hours for the effects of food poisoning to manifest, so it's hard to say exactly what caused it. I was sleeping next to V, but when I heard the sound, I woke up to tend to him. After it was all over, I got him some warm water and warm apple slices, microwaved until slightly translucent. Then I brought him some extra blankets and tucked him into bed in his room. I spent the rest of the night beside him.

I still wonder if you've ever had food poisoning. If you have, then I hope that someone kindhearted took care of you through it. It's a terrible thing to have to go through alone.

I woke up a few hours later. He was still not feeling great, so I went out, both to pick up some brownies that Br, the dandelion-haired man, made for me and my house, and to pick up some Pedialyte and saltine crackers at the grocery for J. J tried to say he only needs the Pedialyte, since we have apples at home. But I know enough about food poisoning to understand that apples are acidic and potentially not great for an already-irritated stomach. I got the saltines anyway, and he ended up eating quite a few of them. It was good.

I spent most of the rest of today leisure writing and generally keeping watch just in case J needed anything. I tried the brownies that Br had made; they had bits of dried apricots in them, which complemented the chocolatey flavor nicely. They were some of the gooiest brownies I've ever eaten - truly delectable. He said he's gonna tell me the recipe soon; I wonder if I can use it to improve the pumpkin brownies I made for you.

Today, V chilled out in the living room, doing V's own thing. Parallel play is lovely because we can all do our own thing, and there's no pressure for any of us to entertain each other. It's good stuff! M did his own thing, too. J spent a fair bit of time sleeping today, and that was good. Towards the evening, it seemed like J had managed to expel the offending substance from his system, and he felt a lot better. He and I brought V home, and then we came back. M, J, and I watched DanDaDan, and that was very good. J is now in bed, sleeping. M is unwinding in his room. I'll go to sleep next to M soon – probably after I'm done with today's letter, unless I get distracted doing something else.

Instead of physical therapy on Tuesday this week (today), it is tomorrow (Wednesday). R, too, will come by to visit tomorrow. He wants to bake the cookie dough he gave to us. It should be a lot of fun, and I'm looking forward to the results. Tomorrow should be delightfully busy. Though I'm still hoping to get a sec to try out that game that An from work suggested. I'll take pictures of it for you when I do, okay?

...I wish you were here. I wish you were here to witness all the little things. To see all the beauty in the small interactions. To be part of all the little ways we of my house and my social circle take care of each other when the going gets rough. I speak of you often enough that it's almost as though you're here, floating around in the aether. Almost.

...Impossible, I know. Forget I said it, okay?

Anyway, I think you'd love it here. And I know you'd fit right in. Seamlessly, you'd fit right in. Because I don't keep friends who go around judging others for their appearance, abilities, or manner of birth. It's not how we do. You'd be absolutely fine here. We'd keep you safe from anyone who might try to be an asshole in your general direction. You wouldn't have to worry about a thing.

...Well uh. Except for the whole “climate change” thing and the whole “imminent rise of fascism” thing. Today it was like 50 degrees Fahrenheit at my house (10 degrees Celsius) when it's supposed to be 32 degrees Fahrenheit (0 degrees Celsius) or less. But ya know, if by some small miracle we could get you here temporarily to hang out and have a nice time with us, we could probably send you back home before the shit really hits the fan.

...Maybe you'd take us with you. I wonder how we might adjust to life on your planet. I suspect that your planet is probably at least a little smaller than mine. Probably your atmosphere is richer in oxygen, too. I wonder how it'd work out. O'course, my dyspraxic, Ehlers-Danlos-afflicted ass probably wouldn't be able to fight the wildlife where you live. So there's that. All things considered, I'd probably get eaten by something in less than a week. Ah well.

It's impossible anyway. Not sure why I'm even thinking about it.

Well. It's late and there's nothing else rolling around up in my head. So I guess I'll go to sleep. I'm kinda short on hours in that regard...

Maybe I'll leave you this nice playlist, just in case you have trouble sleeping sometime:

...I wish you could tell me what's rolling around up in your head. It'd be nice. And... I think maybe you could use someone to talk to who doesn't wanna hurt ya somehow...

Hey. I love you a whole lot. So please stay safe out there. Remember to reach out to someone who cares for you when you're struggling, okay? And try to remember, too, that you've got a lot of people here who truly do care about you. Angeal and Zack certainly do, even if they're sometimes derpy-derps who drop the ball.

No one is perfect, Sephiroth. And you don't have to be perfect, either.

I'll write again soon.

Your friend, Lumine

[rainyfestivalsweets]

9/15/24

I hate that I am wasting fall hiking time being sick and feeling like shit. I had a rough night and a very long slow get going this morning. So long and slow that I don't know that I am going yet.

I had a rough night, despite cold meds and sleep aids. And a lidocaine patch and CBD muscle rub put on my hurting spots.

I tossed and turned and coughed and sweated so much I had to change my nightshirt. Despite getting up many times thru the night to change my gear and go to the bathroom, I bled all over my sheets.

I am awake now, barely. Finished a Monster, did a nebulizer, got cold meds in me, plus my normal supplements, made some tea, my bedsheets are in the wash, & I started puttering around my office.

Every time I buy something, my office has to somehow absorb it. All my books, teas, coffee, sports supplements, any kind of vitamin thing. It all has to go somewhere. So I am working on that. I want it to be functional and less cluttering. Everything needs a home. This is a very maximalist room, bookshelves on 2 whole sides of the room. My desk, the extra desk, and a dresser that serves as my coffee bar. Literally every space is covered with stuff.

I am focusing on making sure the stuff I need to use and find is reachable. I need to be able to grab a coffee/tea or some vitamins/supplements, very quickly.

My weak points are doom piles everywhere. Mail. Piles and piles and piles. Things I meant to deal with probably 6 months ago. Or 5 years ago.

Send all the positive vibes please as I try to focus on bringing some peace back to this space.

I realized I was making the same mistake I made yesterday by not wearing shoes. So, I am going to fix that first. Coffee, tea. Maybe watch an office decluttering video.

Everything hurts and I just uggghhhh.

But if Schmidty can lose weight and keep ot off, so can I.

Maybe I should also grab a shower, that might feel real nice.

[pbandjesse]

I could feel better right now. My stomach hurts. I feel so dehydrated even though I keep sipping water. I just had kind of a rough day.

I didnt sleep amazing. I woke up a lot and had weird dreams. So when my alarm went off I told James I needed to sleep more and gave myself an extra hour. It helped a little but pretty quickly it would fade and I would feel bad again.

I tried really hard to be positive though. James left me breakfast so after I got dressed I warmed that up. And packed a little lunch. I had some juice but it didn't make me feel much better.

I drove to camp. And very quickly started to not feel well again. But it also makes me feel stupid. I don't want to have to keep asking to go home. I want to be able to work. But when there is nothing for me to do I just feel miserable.

There were positive things today though. It was my dad's birthday! He's 70! Incredible. And it's my parents' wedding anniversary! They got married on his birthday so that he wouldn't forget. And it's Friday the 13th. And the start of my 13th week of pregnancy! Which means baby is now a peach! Or a kiwi. Depends on the app you check.

I tried to let those things make myself feel better. But it was hard. I would had some things to do though which was something. I spent a few hours going through all the private schools in an hour radius and finding emails for history, science, and social studies teachers. This turned out to be a ton of work because not every school has a very good website design. It was hard to actually get emails. But I got a really good amount and I was happy about that.

I would also work on my alphabet drawing. I made files with every letter. So that's started at least. And I would send some emails and poke around online.

I had lunch around 11. I told everyone about our appointment yesterday and seeing baby flip around and stretch. It was nice to talk about it.

I wasn't feeling great though. And went up to arts and crafts to take some materials to put away. And spent a good amount of time laying in the hammock. I just wasn't feeling good. But I wanted to stay until at least 2. I laid in the hammock for a half hour. Just trying to feel better.

Eventually I went back to the office. And Heather had two tasks for me. Finally. And I would spend time researching private schools in York that we can email. And updating the email blast with the more accurate Native American Field trip stuff. But then I had stabbing pains in my boobies and was just like. Okay I'm done. And said goodbye.

I stopped at 711 and got a snack. And only got stuck in some traffic for a little bit. And was home right after 330.

When I got back here I was excited that my package had come. I purchased a baby carry wrap. Which not shocking is way to large on my torso but is perfect for James. I didn't realize that its flame pattern in one side and crane patterned on the other. Really cool.

I laid in bed for a long time. I didn't really leave bed for the whole evening. I would lay down and wait for James to come home. And when they did they had a gift for me too!

They got me the special Japanese Calico Critter seals!! I was so excited. They are so soft and I'm excited to add them to the doll house.

James would try on the carrier. And we found a tutorial video on how to wrap it but our guess ended up being correct. James would practice with a weighted plushie. I thought it was so sweet.

James made us dinner. I had a quesadilla and a hashbrown and a scrambled egg. Which was probably to much food because I feel all swollen now. But thankfully I didn't feel nauseous. Just swollen and not great. I'm glad that eating is easier. Everything doesn't go to a pinpoint and I think I'm going to black out. I am thankful for that.

I took a shower and washed my hair and gave mostly just been laying down. James has been hanging out with me. Sweetp too. He wants to lay on my stomach so much and we have to keep blocking him from doing so and he doesn't understand. My poor baby.

I am really hoping I can sleep easy and feel better tomorrow. We have the market all morning and then we are having dinner with Jules, that girl I met a few months back. I am hoping to just sleep all afternoon and be in a good mood for that.

I hope you all had a good day. Wish my dad a happy and healthy birthday. I love you all. Goodnight!!

[mozart-the-meerkitten]

CW/TW- Pet Death

So last night I asked for prayers for me and my parents because we'd had a really rough and emotionally trying day. I will now explain. This is, unfortunately, also a Kitten Update on my Bengal kittens, so if you've become emotionally invested in them and aren't up for reading this right now, look away and come back to it another time. Or just don't come back to it. Alright, disclaimer over, you've been warned.

Alright, I'm going to keep this as succinct as possible to try and limit how much I end up crying.

We took the six girl kittens to get spayed yesterday.

Tulip, the littlest kitten, Leeli's runt, had a heart condition we didn't know about. It's all but invisible, there are barely any signs and there is no way to know it exists without special tests being done which we never even thought to do because we had never had an issue with it before and we have had Bengal cats for a long time.

They put Tulip under anesthesia and during the procedure her heart just... stopped. They did everything they could to revive her, they gave her CPR, they gave her epinephrine, but it didn't work. She died.

The vet said she likely had a heart condition where the heart walls thicken and it takes more and more effort then for the heart to beat. My mom looked it up and usually by the time symptoms are visible the cat only has 3-6 months to live. There is no cure, all they can do is slow it down/improve symptoms.

I realized, and shared with my parents, that Tulip was already showing symptoms. She always tired out before the other kittens, she slept more than them, when she was littler she'd come and fall asleep on me because she knew I'd keep other kittens from pouncing on her. Two days ago I'd left Madia and Tulip in my room for maybe 10-15 minutes and they were waking up from a nap, so I assumed they'd be tearing around when I got back. They were curled up on my bed again and I thought that was odd, but...

But Tulip was little, she was the runt, there was no reason to question these things because they're not uncommon behavior for runts (being smaller they have less energy/stamina). And she was as fiesty as any Bengal kitten we'd ever had. A few days ago I saw her attack Farid, her brother, who is over a FULL POUND heavier than her, and start beating him up. She gained weight, she ate well, she acted like a normal kitten!

She was already showing symptoms at 4-6 weeks old, maybe earlier. 3-6 months to live (usually) after symptoms show up. Her heart stopped when she was 4 months old.

It was basically as if we'd had her put to sleep. She felt no pain, she didn't even know. She just fell asleep.

There was no happier kitten in existence than Tulip. That little baby would purr like a MOTOR if you were in the ROOM with her, not even if you were holding her, petting her or playing with her. She just purred ALL THE TIME. She was such a sweet little bug that you couldn't get mad at her. All she knew was happiness and love, and like my mom said, there aren't many cats or people that's true of. She had the happiest kittenhood, the happiest life that any cat could ever have. Her siblings knew that their baby sister needed extra TLC so they made sure to always snuggle around her, Madia went slower so her baby sister could keep up, they loved her, they loved her, they loved her.

Tulip was going to die soon, we just didn't know it. At least this way, God gave us some answers and reasons as to why. I told my mom yesterday that this was simply her span of days, and it was short but very bright.

I named her after a spring flower. Tulips have a short season and then they fade. Tulip's season was short but vibrant and full of life. And when I thought about it today, about if I would have rather had her just not be born alive so I didn't have to go through the grief of losing her after I'd known her...

I couldn't imagine a world where I hadn't experienced that baby's life. I'd do it all over again. Her span of days was short but bright and I was with her every day of her life. I was her forever. And I loved her and I loved her and I loved her.

This was not my fault, I did everything right, I have no regrets. Sometimes things happen that are out of our control. She would never have lived long, but I gave her the best life any kitten could ever have.

Tulip is buried in my Hideout, in the Gnarled Forest, next to Dora. There is no higher honor I could give her than that.

All the others kittens came thought surgery fine and are recovering.

[umichenginabroad]

Stockholm Week 10: Grind Before Barcelona

Hi! I can’t believe that it’s already the end of March. Isn’t that crazy? It still feels like late February to me. 

I’m bringing this up because my trip to Barcelona is coming up real fast. I am leaving on the 27th when the Explorative Travel Week begins! We get a week off as a travel break; certain elective courses travel as a class during that week, but I am not in any of those electives so I get a week off from school. Hurray! 

The number 1 country I wanted to travel to was Spain, and I am finally going there next week. That also means that this week has been rough, catching up with all the homework and finishing up projects before the break. 

3/18 Mon: (the best news) Class Canceled! 

On Monday, the only class I had switched to online at the last minute due to traffic issues. 

I took the opportunity to call my boyfriend and my mom while I worked on my assignments the entire day. I slept earlier than usual, around 11 pm, to treat myself :) 

3/19 Tue: Spicy Uno

We have been watching this Netflix series called The Chestnut Man in the Scandinavian Crime Fiction class, and I have been on my nerves since the start of the show. The plot and the music interact too well to the point that I have to cover my ears and close my eyes every now and then. I hate horror movies but I would say this is an extremely well-played thriller/detective show. I recommend it to anyone who likes mystery/crime genre! 

When I’m at home, I always have to try very hard to refrain from watching the rest of the episodes on my own. It has been a difficult battle but I made it to the 5th episode (out of 7) without binge-watching it alone. 

I didn’t know (and wouldn’t have known) that crime fiction was so popular in the Scandinavian region before I took this class. I can see why it’s so famous; all the books and films are quite good! I always look forward to starting a new book or series in class. This course has been my absolute favorite class in Stockholm :) 

During lunchtime, I surprisingly met a new friend who’s going to Barcelona on the same day!!! She and her friend booked their flight yesterday, so I never heard about them when I was asking everyone if they’d like to join our Barcelona trip. The most surprising part was that her friend turned out to be my friend who always sat next to me in two classes! We exchanged numbers to talk more about the trip. 

Afterward, I went to Arkivet, a second-hand store on the higher end. There are high-quality clothes that are in good condition—all the way from H&M and Zara to COS, BOSS, and Coach. Although it is a bit more expensive than other stores like Myrona or Stockholm Stadsmission, the pool is much better in my opinion. I bought a Tommy Hilfiger trench coat for $70! 

There are so many buttons on this coat

Happy with my purchase, I came back home and made Alfredo pasta for dinner. I have been CRAVING creamy pasta and it momentarily satisfied my yearning. I need to go to an Italian restaurant and get a good alfredo spaghetti soon. 

I threw some chicken and sausage in there too :) 

That night, my friends and I all gathered around my room to play Spicy Uno. My friend taught us the extra rules and it was a lot more fun than I expected. Towards the end, we even incorporated Never Have I Ever into the game (ง˙∇˙)ว

After they all left, I couldn’t sleep right away because of the sugar rush from all the goodies we ate (ice cream, jellies, chips, chocolate bars, and wafers). 

I blame this sugar rush for the catastrophe that happened a few minutes later. 

I was peacefully putting on a new set of fake nails until the nail glue fell down on my joggers. I can definitely say that it was an exothermic reaction because where the glue spilled was hot. Thankfully, I was able to separate my pants from my thighs by lifting it up a little bit, but my pants did not survive the accident. 

Picture that captures the moment of the tragic incident 

If anyone knows how to remove nail glue on clothes please let me know ( •́ ̯•｡̀ )

3/20 Wed: Skansen Open-Air Museum! 

Today’s field trip for our Swedish class was Skansen, the world’s first open-air museum! 

The escalator was endless and the area of the museum was unparalleled to any other museums I visited. We had a full experience with the tour guide—we even got to go into houses from the 1700s and see reindeer! 

Us inside the houses

More cool photos: 

Some cool facts: 

Going to church was obligatory: people were officially tested on their bible knowledge and the answers were recorded! 

Each house was numbered (well over two thousand pieces for each house), deconstructed, relocated, and reconstructed in the museum! 

After free fika with the entire class, my friend and I hung out around T-Centralen. We went to cafes, second-hand stores (again), and the system. We headed back to the hog together. 

For the rest of the night, I worked on the insurmountable group project for my online ChemE class until 4 am… ;) 

3/21 Thu: Reeeaaaading

I woke up early to do the pre-lecture homework for the classes. Despite dozing off for a few minutes here and there, I finished the assignment! 

For Friday’s class, I started and finished reading half of The Wolf and the Watchman by Niklas Natt och Dag. I’m starting to spot the similarities in the settings of the crime fiction novels! 

3/22-3/23 Fri-Sat: Zoom Meetings

I devoted two whole days to working on the group project. I had a series of Zoom sessions with the Professor and then with teammates. 

Cooking and doing laundry was my time off from work! 

When I was done with the project around 11 pm Saturday, I started scavenging for English-guided tours for Barcelona. The tickets were rapidly selling out! 

I managed to get an English tour of Sagrada Familia and Park Guell. They were expensive, but when would I ever have the chance to visit Spain? With that mindset, I joyfully paid for the events. 

3/24 Sun: Planning Barcelona..

My body weighed 200 tons today and wouldn’t have gotten out of bed until 2 pm if it wasn’t for the Barcelona planning meeting I scheduled with my friends. 

We met at Downtown Camper Cafe in T-Centralen and stayed there for three hours, making reservations and finalizing schedules. We are ready to fly to Barcelona! 

The bathroom was fancy

Again, when I got home, I cooked and did more homework.

Tada!

With the energy I gained from dinner, I was able to work on the group project until I got burnt out at 9 pm. I called my mom for a little (meaning 1.5 hours) and did some more work before going to sleep. 

I am SO excited to share my experience in Barcelona next week! 

Stay tuned for new, rejuvenating adventures coming soon!!! 

Tack,  

Jiwoo Kim 

Chemical Engineering

DIS Study Abroad in Stockholm, Sweden

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

The great regular sleep experiment of 2024 day "I should stop making excuses for my stupid body"

Okay, I didn't sleep much during my night sleep. I'm tired.

And I know I was just blaming being a bit hyperthyroid, but the thing is I was more hyperthyroid the entire time since I had goiter and had to start packing in the iodine, and not sleeping didn't become the problem I was having until I tried to start pushing myself onto a regular schedule.

Before regular sleep I was sleeping 8-16 hours, now I sleep 4 hours okay-good-ish and then try and fail to sleep a separate 4 hours with mixed poor results...

This isn't sustainable for me and forcing myself to do a bunch of chores isn't either, but now that my brain is in this rough pattern I either have to wait for it to naturally break, or I have to try to force it to break and deal with whatever symptoms that causes.

I kind of feel like biting everything.

Anyway I finished making cookie batter when I got up and I had a thought yesterday about laundry... I want to catch up but doing a big tub in the shower hurts my spine so so bad... and there's only so much I can do in the sink and then have the room to hang, so I have been ding little batches and then having to wait for that to fully dry... BUT if I just set up the drying rack in the shower stall, I can hand wash clothes periodically through a day or two out here and then to hang them in the shower. They only take about a day to dry, so if I shower first, it shouldn't get in the way of anything. Then I can wash my bedding, then the only laundry I will ever have is to wash the outfit I am wearing, or my current bedding and towel, before I put it away/back. Bam. Forever completely caught up on laundry and dishes. I have a system now. I was only behind before because of all the times I had to run myself down organizing boxes and furniture in here since moving in.

Really the fact that I can maintain anything in my health should be super impressive, let alone chip away at other things, but I want to get downsized and settled in already. I want the 'reclaiming my life' part done so I can do the 'living my life' part. It's been almost a year since I got this place and escaped the problems involved with shitty roommates.

I have no idea what possessed me and made me think regular sleep would help me specifically. I am sure it was well intended, but I am always forgetting the very specific reasons why I don't do the things you would assume would be helpful to anyone. It's always because I tried it upside down and sideways, for months or years at a time, tracked and documented all of it, and made the very informed decision that it is worse actually, or at best unnecessary.

I am very much a 'runs a practical experiment on myself and uses the results' kind of person. Tracking the food I ate and my symptoms is how I eliminated half my migraines and figured out I have MCS which my doctor later confirmed, doing so no longer serves a function until a problem comes up. Doing monthly budgeting and tracking receipts for years is how I figured out I don't need to do that. I am consistently under budget and always saving up money if there's any money to spare, through most of it I was on welfare and had only 200 to spend per month and I just watched it all go to basic necessities every month. When I got more money I started ordering crafting supplies or buying tools here or there... And then I stopped that too and otherwise the only change in spending is that i still don't and just shove the extra in savings for the next emergency or need. Budgeting for me just doesn't accomplish anything, I KNOW where all my money is going. Or caffeine, turns out fully cutting caffeine for months on end does nothing except make me agitated and unfocused and increase the number of migraines I get as an overall trend, all long after the possibility of withdrawal symptoms, because I have adhd and a migraine disorder, both of which are known to be helped my caffeine.

I test these things but I also have a shit memory, apparently, because I fucking know why regular sleep doesn't work for me and I don't know why I thought this would help...

But for science, and because I already fell in this trap, we march on.

If I start to sound like maybe there's a gas leak in my apartment you'll know why.

On the bright side, when I am really tired or didn't sleep well, or get a headache, or the sudden onset sleepies... I only have to force myself awake till my next viable sleep slot, which is 5 hours in the morning and my night slot can happen at 6pm or 12midnight I don't care which. So it'll be easier to maintain that over time and my cat won't wake me up constantly if he gets used to it too.

Oh yeah, that's half of why i decided to try this... My cat thinks humans only sleep for 4 hours at a time max, unless they are very sick. Because of me. Because he lives with me, so trying to sleep 8 hours a day in a solid chunk at random times just meant he was waking me up every 2-3 hours no matter what and that wasn't sustainable either. I remember now. I always wake up half way through for a bit anyway, so whatever.

[casspurrjoybell-33]

Wreckless - Best and Worst - Part 1

*Warning Adult Content*

Emmett

I'm slightly irked by the hundred dollars but I also know he's been wanting to pay for things since the first time we ordered pizza.

I also know he has it.

He's not going to drop it, either and if I try to give some of it back it'll turn into a thing.

I hate 'things'.

Fine. We will eat really well this week.

I toss yet more laundry into the machine, between all the sheets we're going through and my work clothes, I've got a small mountain to wash.

Then it's off to the store.

I'm not used to shopping for two.

I know he loves ice cream and I get an extra carton, plus some more chocolate sauce.

I get him microwave popcorn and the already popped stuff that they have in the chip aisle.

I grab a marinated pork loin, some chicken and some hamburger along with some salad and veg, the boy needs some real food if he's going to survive off my cum for breakfast and whatever he manages to find for lunch.

At least he let me feed him this morning.

God, this morning.

I didn't expect anything, at all.

Seriously, I didn't even need anything.

I came twice yesterday and that is more than enough for me.

He, however, seemed to need it and once I knew he was fully aware that I didn't expect or need a blow job, I let him have fun.

Hell, I've been called a lot of things in my life but I'm not actually stupid.

I can't explain why seeing him go from a sweet, sleeping angel to a flustered, choking, desperate boy in less than two minutes makes me want to skip through the store like a five-year old but it's, well, it's everything.

I know he's well rested and he wakes up happy and needy and it obviously does something for him.

I have no idea what but he's in charge and it's the way he wants it.

I love it too but that's just a bonus, I've never had a problem with a regular suck, not that I've ever gotten them so regularly.

The past few weeks and the past week in particular, have been a whirlwind.

It took us weeks to dance around and decide if we were even dating and man, I almost completely fucked up the whole 'little' thing but he seems to be really coming out of his shell.

He seems happier.

I know I am.

I almost forget to grab some flowers and a bottle of wine for tonight but I remember at the last minute and get everything purchased and put away at home.

I switch the laundry, clean Marten's cage and collapse onto the couch.

One of the back cushions is askew and I fix it, then immediately think about last night.

If someone would have told me six months ago or even six days ago that I would have said those things, been so rough or enjoyed it so much, I would have laughed in their face.

I can't remember what time Finnegan left but it's been awhile, right?

He'll probably be back soon.

Do I want to be rough all the time? No.

That boy is magic and he deserves to be loved properly.

I make a promise to myself that the next time will be much different than last night was.

Maybe I can get him to ride me again, that was fantastic.

I decide to slice up the watermelon and have it ready, he may be munchy when he gets home from church.

Home.

Shit, I need to stop that.

He's made it very clear from the beginning that he's leaving and not a year from now, no, soon.

As in later this summer.

I don't want to think about it.

At first it made me brave, what did I have to lose?

I either had to grab on and hope to have some fun or let him slip through my fingers and disappear back to Michigan without anything ever happening.

But now?

So much has changed this week that I can't imagine just letting him walk away.

It needs to wait.

I can't deal with everything that's happened this week and that too.

I'll end up drunk and sad and I've done that more than my fair share.

I wonder if he'll come to dinner tonight.

I've never taken anyone to my dad's, he's never met anyone I dated at all.

He knows I'm gay but since my coming out conversation, it feels very much like don't ask, don't tell did in the army.

Don't tell me it's over, trust me, it's not. 

He was fine then or said he was at least but I was leaving the house and joining up and we didn't see each other a lot for eight years.

You grow apart, you know?

Grow up.

I have no idea whether or not any of that distance is because of that fateful convo or just the way things go.

He's a good guy and when I mentioned inviting a 'friend' to dinner he said...

"Sure."

But.. I don't know.

If Finnegan decides to go I'll have to call and make sure he knows we're dating but then what if he freaks?

It's not like I can uninvite Finnegan but actually... I'd just cancel... Fine.

My dad and I are complicated.

My mother dying made it that way.

Me being gay makes it that way.

Running off and disappearing for eight years and missing his second wedding made it that way.

But we do okay, really.

We talk some, he knows I'd do anything for him and he tells me he loves me.

Wrote me letters whenever I was deployed, too, it meant the world.

I should see him more than I do.

I need to do better.

[ghostofasecretary]

i upped my dose of focus meds in October because i was having A Bad Time getting things done. also then Nakba 2.0 started at the same time i switched over and i have been bowled over with grief and shame and nervous energy to take action and more grief

(i was part of a local movement that recently helped stop a "we uncritically support Israel" statement from going forward in the city council, which is probably not very meaningful but i do think it's better than the alternative, so, yay?)

and i have just been feeling. SO shit lately. i have had 5 days from October 7th to now (5/40 days) where i only did one or two things worth recording in my planner, and only 2 from August 27th-October 6th (2/40 days). there were a few extra days in the pre-switch times where i only did 3 things but i don't think i felt so shit then???

and like. i have had great things in the last month-and-change! i have a new class, i've met some cool people, i've had some good social interactions.

i have also been thinking "i want to die" and "i wish i were dead" WAY MORE OFTEN in the past few weeks than i remember thinking previously. i had some rough days during my hellish job situation but was pretty firmly in "being alive is great and i love it, i'm so glad i'm alive" from March to August this year, i think?? so it's kinda scary to be back to "i wish i could sleep forever" and "if i were dead i wouldn't have to feel so bad" and "oh kill me already"

also i have been taking my PRN anxiety meds waaaaaay more than baseline in the last month. the baseline is 0. i got them in December and, though i needed them then, couldn't take them till January, and in January and February i took them rarely, and then i maaaaybe took them once between March and August but certainly not more.

earlier this year i was like "huh, i really don't think i have general anxiety anymore, just PTSD symptoms after major triggers and the occasional hard time with ADHD symptom management" and today i woke up from a nightmare about my shitty ex visiting me (!?) and--i will spare the details but it sucked ass, and plus it took me *twenty minutes* with *another person helping me* to text someone back today and like. some help with unusually stressful communications is normal but i knew i needed help with this as of 3pm yesterday and did not ask for help till, like, 3pm today. which i don't...think?? is normal for me??

oh god i just remembered another crushing anvil of a contact i haven't replied to, fuck my LIFE

i feel like i have the emotional self-awareness of a bug right now

(please no one suggest therapy i think it would make my life much worse actually and though it may look like i have no clue what's happening inside of me, you certainly have less of a clue)

but also, like, there are some unusual stressors. there's a genocide happening. i've seen a lot more dead bodies in the past month than i usually do. the normal number of dead bodies i see is none. ditto the number of injured people covered in the dust of their bombed homes. and it's The Dark Time as of 12 days ago. my whole family was sick and i had to avoid them for most of October. i have no income and grad school deadlines are approaching and both of those facts are bone chilling.

but i think that my meds may be making my anxiety worse and also making my likelihood to have suicidal thoughts a lot higher. i think.

so i probably need to lower my meds.

even though they *have* helped me focus when i can snap out of the hours long borderline-catatonic dread i get locked in and actually do work i need to focus for

it's. maybe not worth it. probably not worth it. it is genuinely hard to tell

(and like--i requested an upped dosage BECAUSE i was really struggling! and having a hard time doing things! and didn't feel like i could focus. and i felt really bad!! but maybe objectively the anxiety and increased-wanting-to-die are bigger and that outweighs the potential benefits)

(like. i don't think i was having *zero* suicidal ideation before the med increase but i think it was. less? i remember the first "oh shit that's not normal" was before one of my Tuesday calls and. hm. i think it was in October that this started. October 17th or maybe even the 24th? though my mental health has been trending down since August, more generally.

trying to figure out how much current events may be impacting me. covid didn't make me suicidal? --actually it kinda did but i had also just been assaulted and had no routine and a ton of pressure and grief and it was a much worse time for me than this. and most of those thoughts were concentrated in a 5 day period of frantic sleepless essay writing. this situation is like. grief that isn't about me. a degree of shame i think is reasonable to feel. not "i am the worst person on earth" just "i am ashamed to be part of the world that enables this horror and ashamed to be from the only country in the world frothing at the mouth to support it." despairing at how many people have been killed and at how slow anyone is to stop it. i am sad about all that a lot and sorrow doesn't make anyone fast or mega productive, but this major historical event touches me a lot less directly than covid? so maybe it's not actually a good comparison point. i would certainly be happier if Israel (and the US) stopped attacking hospitals and destroying critical infrastructure and trying to erase Palestine and Palestinians from existence)

i remember we tried lowering my dose of antidepressants earlier in the summer because i'd been Feeling Peppy the week i was forced to go off of them, but that did not help. when was that? did that start me getting crazier?? i have no clue

1 day in 8 is a lot more days lost than 1 day in 20. i should probably switch my dose back and suffer through it.

in conclusion: gratgkrhejrisjdkskskekzARGH

i'm gonna go cook

[some-kindofgnome]

now everything is easy

do not interact with this post if you are under 18.

Katsuki wakes next to you the morning after your heat reaches its peak.

c: katsuki bakugou x reader

wc: 3.7k

cw: smut (18+), morning sex, subtle alpha/beta/omega dynamics (knotting, heat cycles,  descriptions of scent & slick), vaginal & oral sex, aftercare if you squint, katsuki is like lovingly disgruntled through most of this but he adores you i promise

notes: Bakugou lovers, what’s up? It’s been a minute... 😅I can’t BELIEVE how long it’s been since I’ve written about Bakugou. But I signed up to write him for a few collabs over the summer, so here’s my warmup. I think I did this trope wrong but he goes down on u so like that’s fun, right? 👀

(MASTERLIST)

Morning comes hot and sticky, drizzling like honey into Katsuki’s slowly waking mind.

For a long time, waking slowly like this seemed little more than a far-off dream, for the man who could never be caught off guard. Most days his eyes still spring open, fully alert to the sound of his six o’clock alarm. But when she needs him, he loses himself easily to her.

To you.

He’s not sure what time it is exactly, only that midmorning sun splashes obscenely across the mussed bedclothes, lighting up the soft green of the worn linen and the buttery eggshell-painted wall beyond. His muscles settle into a dutiful ache. His thighs are still a little stuck together. He kind of needs to piss.

But you, fragile and perfect with the dew of your leftover heat drying on your spine, are worth lingering for.

You’re still fast asleep as he rolls onto one hip, fresh scratches pulling and stinging in the muscles of his back. The sheet’s tucked haphazardly over the curve of your hip, but you’re sprawled on your side with your torso left carelessly bare.

He can’t help himself, leaning forward to bury his nose against your scent glands, pulling the strong reek of you into his head. Your scent is so easy to read- maple-sweet, fragrant like orange blossom and deliciously mingled with his own. Last night, he fucked you both into sheer exhaustion, and the sheets still waft puffs of your mingled scents with every shift of his body.

Still, you’ll be wanting more soon. He gives your petal-soft skin a devilish little nip, rolling away to stretch yesterday’s exertion from his tendons.

Before he can even shift to climb out of bed for the bathroom, you’re squirming beside him.

Too late.

Those long, peaceful breaths of sleepy silence quickly give way to strained little whimpers as your senses come back to you. Last night, your heat cycle had reached its peak. But after a full measure of sleep- and eight hours without the fill of your alpha- he knew this was coming.

“Alpha,” you keen, struggling with even one coherent word. Katsuki’s instincts flare to life while you wake up, fresh waves of your needy scent filling his head and bringing his alpha to the surface. His cock stirs greedily against one thigh, stiffening traitorously in response to your voice.

He sighs harshly, flopping back against the pillows. His jaw ticks, letting firm throbs of desire swell in his gut.

“Couldn’t even wait for me to take a piss, could you?” He growls, no shortage of affection in his rough tone. You’re already rolling over, tangling clumsy, slick thighs in the soiled sheets.

“Please,” you sigh. “One more. I need one more.”

“C’mere,” he grunts, palming your ass to bring you close. “Let me see you.”

Your flesh is hot and sticky beneath his touch, and he knows how badly you need him but he can’t help indulging. Not now, when you’re so pliable and needy for him. It’s cruel to think so, but he loves you most when you’re desperate like this. His mean streak doesn’t come for you very often, but he can’t help it. You’re so easy to tease, and so much cuter when you want something.

He slips between your thighs to quell your squirming, letting you settle onto your back. You spread your legs as far as they’ll go, staring up at him with that wide, vulnerable, irresistible expression you always get at this time in your cycle. It’s how can tell your heat’s coming, far before the changes to your scent. The first time you look up at him like this every season, he knows it’s all over.

Your thighs are still crusted with last night’s slick and dried remnants of cum, but when you spread them, long strings of fresh fluid break and drip onto the mattress. The warm slip of your sex is glistening already.

Katsuki decides in that moment that he’s going to take his time with you, whether you’re ready to wait for it or not.

“You feeling patient?” he chuckles, lip curling as he flicks his eyes back to yours. You’re still staring up at him like that, an extra flash of panic lighting your eyes when the word patient reaches your ears.

“W-what,” you plead. “N-no, please, just- now, just do it now…”

Your voice trails into a strangled little squeak of pleasure when he dips his head between your thighs and seals his mouth to your dripping cunt. The familiar sweet musk of you pours into his mouth, cocktailed with the overwhelmingly heady flavor of your heat slick. The tightness in his balls is getting blurry now, half-full-bladder, half-swelling desire. But he can hold it, if it means he gets to pull more of those little cries from your needy throat.

He glides the flat of his tongue up between your folds, knowing that it makes you squeal without actually pushing you any closer to the edge. As he predicted, your thigh twitches by his left ear and your toes curl, but the whine that leaves you is not a satisfied one.

“K-katsuki,” you beg. The shape of his name on your lips comes as a surprise to him, and he glances up at you with a flinch of his brow. While there’s nothing quite like the way you shout “alpha” in the throes of your heat, when you’re all sleepy and sticky and half-conscious like this, his name feels good, too, hanging in the bleary air between you.

It sounds nice.

He rewards you with a lift of his chin, bringing the fat press of his tongue over your swollen clit just once. The sharp flick of it makes you yelp and flinch, slamming your hips into his face so hard he nearly bites his lip.

“Fuck,” he curses without pulling away, “cut it out.” He flattens one palm over the low plane of your pelvis, pressing weight into his wrist and pinning your wriggling hips to the mattress. The angle’s a little more awkward like this, but your toes are starting to twitch and he can tell you’re losing yourself to the pleasure.

He presses one finger to the weeping silk of your slippery folds, nudging it forward to find your needing hole and pushing smoothly inside.

“Jesus, sweetheart,” he croons into your cunt, “y’re fuckin’ grabbing me already.”

Your walls flutter in near-instant reaction to his touch, closing down hard around his middle finger. You squeeze so tightly he can barely draw back out of you again, curling the pad of his finger to find the spongy flesh near your entrance. It’s the tenderest part of you, and when he rubs it just right, you’ll descend into the kind of shivers that’ll make it hard to hold back.

It’s worth it every time, though, to watch you lose your mind under his diligent hands.

Katsuki refreshes the weight in his palm, pinning you freshly down while he re-adjusts to the slick pull of your clutching depths. He cups his tongue against your clit, feeling the heat in its swollen ridge, and dips his ring finger into you, alongside the first. His cock’s fully hard now, drooling wet preek into the sheets and burning with bright, hot tension.

Fuck, it’s going to feel good to get you on his knot again.

He focuses once more on the task at hand, finished revelling in your taste and ready to focus on your pleasure. You like it when he flutters his tongue quick and sharp against your clit, and your cunt’s most sensitive in the shallow parts near your slit. He curls his fingers, rubbing all along the hottest planes. He can practically feel the spots where your nerves sit closest to your skin, making your body spasm when he pins them under his fingers.

“Kah!” The first syllable of his name flies from your lips. He knows you sense his intent now, and your body’s already beginning to stiffen with the promise of climax. He knows you have to tense up a little to make it happen, so when you tense your core beneath the press of his free hand, he knows you’re getting close.

“Close,” you pant anyway, slipping one hand between your thighs and raking your fingers into his hair. When you grab the longest strands at his crown and pull, it sends an unexpected little shock of pleasure to his dick that pulls the air from his chest.

You’re already starting to pitch and shake, but he knows better than to let up now. He keeps the pleasure coming steady and strong, pushing out out a solid rhythm between his tongue and his fingers as he feels you pass the point of no return.

“Right there,” comes your desperate voice, crawling into your upper register. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s it, y-you’re-“

It’s kind of beautiful, how easy to read you’ve become. He’s pretty sure he could satisfy you like this by feel alone at this point, blindfolded with his ears stuffed full of cotton.

A heartbeat and a half later you’re falling, tense muscles suddenly going slack as you dig your heels into the mattress and arch your back off the bed and contract so tight around his fingers he almost busts it right there, trying not to think about how maddening you’re going to feel around his cock in a few seconds. You let out one, long, hushed draw of his name, a “Katsuki,” that wafts by his ears like a fragrant breeze. Then you’re collapsing between his hands, fitful and whimpering and fighting him off.

“Better?” he grunts, sitting back on his heels. He wipes his mouth off with the back of one hand, dipping the pad of his thumb into the corners as he licks your heat-slick from his lips.

The look you give him suggests everything he intended. Better after a peak, perhaps, but there’s only one thing that’s going to satisfy you enough to function today.

Fuck, his knot’s already starting to swell a little when he closes his fingers around himself. He grits his teeth, ignoring the flush of heat that creeps down the back of his neck and willing it to stay small enough to fuck you properly.

He looks up at you again, and your scent crashes into his mind, filling every hollow of his blurry mind. You’re already gushing fresh slick, reaching for him to grab him by the face and pull him back down to your level.

He probably shouldn’t have teased you so long.

He lets you tug him against you, bracing his hands at either side of your head to drop his mouth to yours. He laves his tongue affectionately across your teeth, tasting notes of his scent in the lingering flavour of you. The hint of his own musk serves as a pleasant memory from the night before, when he’d poured his scent into every hollow of your body, claiming you as wholly as you’d given yourself to him.

You’re already humping your hips down against his, with his cock pressing up into the crook of your thigh. Katsuki groans long and low into your mouth, fitting one hand between you to bring his weeping tip to the hot gush of your cunt.

“That’s what you want?” He grunts, dipping his mouth from yours, tucking it against the shell of your ear.

“Katsuki, hmmm,” you whine, dragging your hard nipples against his chest. When he doesn’t move right away you whine again, clutching at his back and trying to rock yourself down onto him.

“Alpha, plea-hah!”

Katsuki delights in the way he can still startle you, after all this time. He cuts off your begging by snapping his hips sharply forward, bottoming out in one clean thrust. He’s never pretended to have the biggest cock in the world. But he’ll be damned if you’re not satisfied by it anyway.

“That’s right,” he pants, closing his eyes against the crook of your neck. “I got what you need.”

He pets a hand down your sternum as he straightens up a little, thumbing the tender swell of one nipple. He slides his fingers into the dip of your waist to brace at the curve of your hip, digging the pads of his fingers into your flesh as he rolls smoothly in and out of your clingy heat.

He closes his eyes again, overcome by the feelings he swallowed to tease you earlier. You are still tender and gooey from last night, molded perfectly to the size of him and sucking him forward every time he tries to pull away. Your slick leaks out around the edges of his cock with every push of his hips, and the quiet, satisfied cries from beneath him send pulses of deep affection into the hollows of his chest.

There’s nothing quite like this, the physical manifestation of the intimacy that lies between you. He is the only one who can do this for you anymore, the only person in the world who can quell the trembling tides of your heat.

He’s not gonna last long at all, getting sweet on you in his head like this.

Determined to make use of the time that he has, he slides his fingers into the back of your knee, pushing your thigh up toward your torso until he can reach up and grab you by the ankle. Slowly, deftly, he straightens your leg, gliding his palm down the length of your shin and guiding the curve of your heel into the crook of his shoulder.

“Pretty like this,” he croons without thinking, turning his head and feathering a quiet little kiss to the inside of your ankle. He spies your reaction out of the corner of his eye, a blissful little sleepy smile that paints your warmed features. Affection clutches low and hot in his belly, a feeling he’s only now grown used to embracing. Tenderly, he wraps his arm around your leg, braces it against his chest, and begins to thrust.

He takes up a slow, heady pace, pulling slowly out of you and then slamming forward with a harsh snap of his hips, revelling in the way your body jerks every time. He can feel the breath rattle against his palate as he sucks it in through his clenched teeth, losing himself in the maddening grip of you. It’s woven into the very fabric of him, loving you. He doesn’t have to say it anymore, not when he can practically read it out of your skin. But he’s promised himself, more fiercely than anything, to take care of you.

He promises you in the way he fucks you through this, muscles stretched thin, balls aching. Worn out on a weeknight’s worth of sleep, calling out of work for the second day in a row, undoubtedly leaving you in bed to put together a decent meal from the fridge he’d stocked this time last week, when you started looking at him Like That and he couldn’t even bring himself to dread it.

You clench, shifting your foot against his shoulder and lifting your hips into his. The tight little ripple around the base of his cock shoots all the way to the base of his spine, and with a sharp little grunt Katsuki slips his free hand down your belly, stretching his thumb over your tender clit. He can already feel his knot beginning to swell again, pleasure spiking hard when he traps your clit under his thumb and starts to stroke, making you cry out and tense into him all over again.

“Kat…suki, I’m.. g-gonna,” you plead, like he can’t already feel it happening again. Even your scent fluctuates when you’re about to cum, rippled with a sharp little spice that peters into sweetness all over again when you bleed down from that high.

“I gotcha,” he promises gently, hooking his arm more firmly around your calf. “Come on, baby. I gotcha. Come on.”

He dips his hips as low as he can, paying extra attention to the beginning and end of every thrust, to overstimulate those tender spots that line your entrance. It works, because before long you’re digging your heel into the meat of his shoulder and convulsing around his pounding length and gushing hot slick that drips down his balls and coats his pelvis and smears across the low end of his stomach.

“Fuck.” The word hisses from his throat, his body taking the green light of your waning climax long before his brain clues in. He digs his fingers into your thigh and leans forward, stretching it up toward your chest and lets himself go, shoving his hips madly against yours and milking every cruel draw of pleasure from his own body until his thighs are shaking with the resistance of it. When the ecstasy finally boils over he slams his hips as far forward as they’ll go, squeezing his eyes shut and shooting long spurts of cum up into your belly. Your walls stretch eagerly around him as his knot expands completely, sealing his pelvis to yours.

Finally, he shrugs your ankle down his arm, gently straightening your leg out over his thigh as you catch your breath. He’s a little winded, too, never quite ready for the overwhelming sensations of taking you.

“That’s never gonna get old,” he mumbles, bowing over your supine form to rest his dewy forehead on yours.

You’re still panting hard, but you laugh airily, eyelashes fluttering against his cheeks. His eyes are closed again but he can feel you grinning and it’s too contagious not to crack a little smile. He ducks his forehead away from yours to nose against the shell of your ear, mouthing gently at your jaw and sliding both hands up and down either side of your torso.

“Better?” he asks, sincere this time. And, sincerely soothed this time, you nod.

“Much better.”

He knows you’re telling the truth, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s going to be on you all day. He can’t keep himself off of you when you’re coming down from the worst of it, all sweet and pliable and soft in a way that you most certainly are not for the other days in your cycle. You kick his ass without hesitation, and he loves you for it. But you’re irresistible like this.

“Now,” he grunts, still nosing his way down your neck, tonguing the sweet hollow of your scent glands, “hurry up and calm down. I gotta take a leak.”

That urge hasn’t gone anywhere fast, growing shallow and tight in the pit of his groin. But it’s not urgent. Not when he’s locked so sweetly (and securely) into your relaxing depths.

“You’re the one that needs to calm down,” you retort in good humour, glancing down for a heartbeat.

“Say that again and I might not bother waiting,” he threatens easily. The noise that escapes your throat is enough to make him snort, pillowing his head in the crook of your shoulder as you turn sharply to find his eyes.

“Don’t. You. Dare.”

“You gonna stop me?” He regrets challenging you immediately when you flail instinctively beneath him, wrenching on the base of his knot and drawing a strangled, pained little wheeze from his chest.

“Fuck, I was kidding,” he scolds, pinning your shoulders to the mattress. “Jesus. Welcome back.”

You’re getting your fire back early. Maybe he’s kind of missed it, after all.  

He keeps himself curled over you like that until his knot’s gone down almost all the way, cock softening out of you and letting fresh drips of slick and cum leak onto his thighs. Finally he pulls himself away from you, padding blindly into the bathroom and flipping on the harsh fluorescent light.

He braces one hand on the wall over the toilet as he relieves himself, still half-hard and wavering on his overworked thighs. After he’s washed his hands he wagers a look in the mirror, turning his back and twisting to look over his shoulder and examine the damage.

He goes back to bed smirking, thinking of the long, angry scratches while the memory of their infliction is still fresh.

You are already half-asleep again when he finds you, so he just pulls the sheets up around your shoulders and drops a kiss to your temple. You’re going to want coffee soon, and you’re going to need breakfast. Neither of you have had a proper meal in longer than he’d care to calculate.

When he steps into some undershorts and eases into the open space that makes up the rest of your apartment, he opens the kitchen windows, since you’ll want fresh air when you come out to join him. He’d stopped by the bagel shop on the corner by the agency the last time he was there, leaving work early to come home to you, because he knew you’d want fried eggs on your favourite sesame bagel when you were finally coherent enough to crave food again.

The routines that make up his devotion to you aren’t the things he learned about in health class. They weren’t written down in the books that were unceremoniously shoved at him after he’d presented, nor did the details of your post-heat care list appear on any neatly packaged powerpoint presentation.

He’s picked them up slowly, the hard way, by messing up over and over and over again. They’re things he never even realized he knew about you, until he looks down at his hands and he’s flipping his own egg every few seconds to keep it from browning but leaving yours in the pan to get crisp around the edges.

It feels good to know you so deeply. Even when, sometimes, the flipside is still a little too vulnerable and scary. Even when he’s still harsh and mean, when he still messes up, when he still catches himself on the edge of fury so often.

You picked him anyway, and he’ll be damned if he’s not going to let that mean something.

[sweetnsour1]

Just imagining Katsuki (or any of the boys really) being so proud and hyped when you finally land a job you’ve been searching for 5+ months to make me feel better 🥰

Long story short, I FINALLY LANDED A WORK FROM HOME JOB TODAY!!! It’s been a long 5 months and I was feeling dejected but I finally got one that pays decent too.

My husband and my cousin were so hyped for me saying how proud they were but when I told my recently turned very religious mom she said “happy for you, is legit??! Praying 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼” and she sent a voice memo asking why I didn’t tell her yesterday when we FaceTimed and kept it a secret. I told her I found out today but I was so excited and now I feel 🫤, like my own mom, that’s all she had to say? Not even a “proud of you”. She said some other stuff too (not sure how comfortable you are talking about religion) but she made me feel like the hard work I put in wasn’t because I did it. Like it was already determined for me because she was “praying for me this whole time”.

Idk I could say more but I’m gonna sleep and pretend the boys would be super stoked for me and wouldn’t discredit the hard work I put in myself 😌💖

Sweet baby bubs 🖤🖤🖤

That’s exciting and I’m so proud of you! It is HARD to keep trying for months. I relate to this so hard, but let’s keep this about you ;)

“Of course you got the fucking job.” The arms that he had snaked around your waist when he walked in the room tighten. He had waited patiently, chin on your head while you finished your call with your mom. One of the only times he would fall silent rather than defend you, knowing that if he were to join in on the “conversation” that had been echoing through the room…he wouldn’t be able to hold back and you would be the one paying the price for his lost temper in the end. You leaned back into his chest, but said nothing…remnants of your initial excitement flickering feebly after dealing with the suffocating nature that was your mother.

“Proud of you.”

His words tickle at the side of your neck as he peppered kisses from your ear to your collarbone, releasing tension you didn’t realize you were still carrying from the short but seemingly endless phone call.

“Also the idiots are dragging us out for dinner to celebrate.”

You laugh, knowing exactly which idiots and exactly which restaurant because this wouldn’t be the first time Katsuki’s friends bubbled over with excitement for you. Their reactions were always so spastic in their affection and support, while his was steady and unchanging. He was the foundation that their rough hugs and shouts of praise could stand on.

And you…you were the reason he had sent a rare message in the Favorite Idiots group chat in his phone hours ago, after you had called to tell him the news first. He was always eager to share how amazing you were with the people that…annoyingly enough…mattered to him the most. He knew that they were as much your family as he was. He knew that Kirishima’s bruising hugs left you happy although gasping for air. He knew that Kaminari’s shouts and dumb fucking jokes made you giggle…although dunce face needed to learn to keep his fuckin’ hands to himself. He knew Mina’s weird ass public cuddling made you look embarrassed and smothered although you never pulled away.

He just knew they could help fill whatever gaps he couldn’t, so if it meant getting 54 extra stupid messages and having to herd a few drunk heroes into Ubers and guest rooms later tonight…he’d gladly let them ruin his night so he could save yours.

[pbandjesse]

Today is the best that I felt in a week and a half. I still have a cough but most of my exhaustion seems to have passed. And that is nice. On this eve before my birthday.

I slept okay last night but it was rough waking up. James had asked me last night if I was going to wake up at 7:00 and go to work with them or sleep in the extra hour. And I woke up in the middle of a dream when my alarm went off at 7:00 and was just like nope. I need that extra hour. And went back to sleep.

When I got up for real I got washed and dressed and made the bed. And checked on sweetp. He still seems to be doing good though I think he's very fat right now. I'm worried that he's swollen but I pressed all over him and he doesn't seem like it's bothering him at all. So I continue to hope that he is okay.

I left here and went and got breakfast. There was a lot of traffic on the way in but I was still on time so it was fine.

And the museum was great today. I was very excited to get to tell everyone about my excellent interview yesterday. And we have a new person who is a older woman. Younger than our old guys. But an established adult. And she's great. She would go with John on tour and then would be with me for the cannery.

And we spent some time talking this morning. And it was a really good way to start the day. Talking to her and John and just poking around. Having a good time.

Our school group walked to the museum, which always surprises me. But when they got there I brought them all inside and we got them all split up. And it was great.

I did not notice that they had gotten there early though. So once we were split up I just took my group and went to do my tour. And right after I introduced myself Jessica comes over and she was like you have 15 extra minutes. Oops. I didn't even think about it. I was just go go. So I gave the longest cannery intro I've ever done. Honestly maybe a little too long but it was okay. The kids were really excited. One of them had been to the museum a bunch and already knew a lot of it so he was able to also make them excited cuz he was excited to share. And I have them all do things like carrying the cans and really got into stuff that I don't always get to get really deep into. It was great.

And the rest of the tour was really excellent We did the machine shop they want to see everything. We even had a couple minutes in the middle to check out the car. Which I think helped a lot because we have been standing still for so long.

And once the tour was over I felt really good about everything and I took them to lunch and went to sit down and have a break myself.

I had my sandwich and just kind of played on my phone. I didn't bring any of my sewing stuff to finish the backs of my embroidery because I wasn't entirely sure how I was going to approach it. But that's fine.

The cannery went great. The new woman's name is Rosia. She's very nice. And I spent the intro of the cannery running her through the whole program and everything that was going to happen. And I kept telling her I know this is a lot that I'm throwing at you but you will get it and please don't quit. And she thought that was very funny. And the cannery was really good. The kids were super engaged and they were a lot of fun. Was having a little trouble with my printing presses but the green one is working a lot better than it was. The black one was embossing the type but not putting ink down and I don't even understand how that's possible. But it's fine.

After the cannery I did some oysters upstairs. Showed Rosia how to clean them and how we set them up. I made some cans as well. We have a new can form because the new lids are slightly smaller. But they fit so much better in the conveyor belt thing we have for sending them downstairs. So hopefully we don't have them get stuck all the time anymore.

I got to show off some of my wedding photos to Rosia as well and she was making a big fuss in that fell really nice. I feel like I haven't shown people our wedding stuff in a bit and it's nice to be able to show them off to a new person.

I sat downstairs with James for a few minutes and talked to Jessica. And we talked about the three new people she's definitely hiring in the two she's probably hiring. And she told me to not feel bad about taking other jobs and other hours because she's not going to be as strapped for people anymore. And that made me feel a lot better. Jake had gotten back to me this afternoon that he was going to send my interest to the groups that I had told him I was interested in working with. And we'll see what happens.

I didn't realize it was going to rain today. But it was raining really bad. I was having some issues with my sinuses when I was sitting down and I found that taking a walk for a minute helps a lot. So I took a little walk around the museum and stopped to tell Mike what I was doing and he said that if I wasn't too busy that I could look for any water on the ground. Because our roof tends to leak. And I did find a spot in the garment loft that is possibly bowing down. So I went to find Phil to look at it and we ended up talking for like 15 minutes about taxes and all that kind of adult stuff. He's really fun guy.

And then I talked to James and decided that I would come back for them since I didn't want them to have to bike in the rain. And I would go spend some time walking around the thrift store because I had a coupon.

I drove out to value village and I had a great time looking at all the purses. I didn't buy a purse because I do not need a purse. But I really loved that I was able to find four very bad fake coach bags. And one real one. I considered buying the real one because the leather felt really good but I don't need another coach bag. And I didn't really like the buckles that were on the strap so I decided that I would be responsible and not buy it.

I mostly have fun looking at the weird stuff and picking things up and poking around for an hour. And then I looked at the dresses and I found two that I really liked. One that's like Grecian and fancy and one that's a sweatshirt material t-shirt dress. And I feel very good about my two purchases and I spent less than $20 because I had a coupon and everything was good.

When I left it was still drizzling but I headed back to get James. I waited in the car for a little while until they were done and then we drove home.

When we got back here James made hot dogs for us and I would go and work in my studio fixing some dresses that have been on my to do pile. Some buttons need to be reinforced in a seam that had been torn. And once I did that I had some spaghetti. And James had to get on their podcast because they're going to have a special guest that they were really excited about. And I jumped in to starting to line the backs of my embroideries.

It took a really long time. Originally I thought I was going to put down pieces of fabric and having to iron them but then I realized that I could just pin them directly. With the folds on the scenes and I had to cut the fabric a few times to figure out exactly how to fit it all together but in the end I'm really happy with it. Took me two solid hours to hand stitch all of these backs on because I could not figure out how to do it on the sewing machine without the stitching showing through the front. And then once I was done all the backs I decided to line the entirety of the pockets because I thought that the weight would work better. And so I did make the pockets on the sewing machine and then hand stitch them on to the jacket. I started at around 5:30 and I finished around 7:30. It was a lot of fun honestly. I don't hand sew as much as I used to. Not counting embroidery. So it was a lot of fun too have this project and now it's completed. I feel really happy about that.

Once I finish that I show James and they finished their podcast pretty soon after that. And then they had another call for their little book club which I think is so cute. And I have been in bed with sweetp since then. I think now though I'm going to get up and go take a shower. I'm going to wash my hair so that I have clean hair for my birthday. Which is tomorrow. I can't believe I'm going to be 32. I have been saying I am 32 for like 3 months though so it doesn't feel as big but I have completed 32 years of life and that is pretty cool. We're about to start 33!

I hope you all have a great night tonight. Sleep great. I will see you tomorrow!

[uwuwriting]

Denki, Dabi and Bakugou in a secret relationship

Request: hii!! i loved your post about the secret relationship being exposed and i was wondering if you could do the same for dabi bakugo and denki - anonymous

Um this was supposed to go up yesterday, I had queued it but tumblr decided to just deleted. Oh well. I hope you like it you guys even though its a day late. This was fun to write. Love ya. 💖💖💖

rules

warnings: some sexy times mentions, fluff

Kaminari Denki

-Kaminari is an idiot.

-I don’t even know who you’ve managed to keep your relationship a secret.

-90% sure the whole school knows and just pretends to be oblivious. 

-Anyways.

-It kinda bothers him that he has to keep it a secret. 

-He wants to scoop you up and spin you around in the hallways, hug you after a really rough training session with Bakubro, kiss you when you are being extra extra cute. 

-Plus he wants to brag to the other idiots for getting a girlfriend first. 

-But alas he respects your wishes and tries to keep it all under wraps. 

-Your parents are pro heroes and have warned you about the dangers of dating since you are their kid. 

-Villains wouldn’t hesitate to threaten you with your significant other if it means they’ll get to your parents. 

-So now Kaminari is stuck sneaking in your dorm late at night only to spend a few hours with you and give you as much kisses as he can fit in the little time you have. 

-Surprisingly he has kept it a secret for almost a year now. 

-No slip ups, no marks on his skin after a spice night, none of your clothes could be found in his room whatsoever.

-Apart from his usual flirty nature towards you, there was nothing that could indicate that you two were an item. 

-Now being in your third year, things had gotten rather serious with your hero works.

-Most of you if not all had been working along side a pro hero for the last year or two but that didn’t mean they would take you in after high school. 

-Every student had to wait for the acceptance letter from the agency or an agency in general and they would be set for their hero work after school. 

-You had been working with a hero agency since your first year and you were pretty happy. 

-But the pro hero you had been with decided that after you were done with your hero studies, he would retire leaving you with no agency to boost your career after school. 

-Kaminari was as devastated as you were.

-He tried comforting you as much as he could, extra hugs and kisses, more snacks and movie nights, anything to help you cope with the fact that you would be back to the starting line once school was over. 

-He hated seeing you cry. 

-Then the unthinkable happened. 

-Mt.Lady was a well known hero and one with a desired sidekick position that no one seemed to really fill. 

-You had just helped her stop a major villain attack tricking the villain and capturing him before he could do any real damage in the area. 

-To say that Mt.Lady was impressed was an understatement. 

-She contacted your hero agency and asked if you had already signed a deal with them.

-You can see where this is going.

-When you got the notice from Mt. Lady’s agency you were over the moon and so was Kaminari. 

-He was so happy that the person he loved the most was finally getting what she deserved. 

-He had dragged you to the janitor’s closet to give you his personal congratulations, catching the attention of a certain red head.

-He kissed you like there was no tomorrow, his arms keeping you as close as possible, flush to his chest as he peppered your face and neck with feather light kisses. 

- “I’m so proud of you babe!”

-You tried to keep your giggles on the down low to no avail since Kaminari’s goal was to make you laugh. 

-For a long moment you didn’t care if someone found you, you were so happy and so comfortable in Denki’s arms that you didn’t want to leave the closet and go back to your hidden lives. 

-Then you saw the light coming from the door, getting ready to lightly scold Kaminari for leaving the door open when you made eye contact with Kirishima......and Mina ..... and Sero..... and somewhere in the far back with a pair of ruby red eyes.

- “Babygirl is everything alright?”

-He hadn’t seen them yet, then he followed your line of vision and the man has never yeeted you out of his arms faster in his life.

-Your friends just stared at you in complete shock for a full minute before Bakugou broke the silence. 

- “Oi you own me ramen Kirishima.”

Dabi

-With this guy I’m not surprised that you managed to keep it a secret. 

-Oh no no no.

-I’m surprised you managed to get him into a relationship.

-It wasn’t easy though you would give him that. 

-You were part of the LoV of course and well you didn’t really take any of their shit. 

-The only person you respected was Kurogiri and that was borderline pity. 

-He had to babysit a 20 year old killing machine with issues, many issues, many many issues. 

-When Dabi approached you with his signature flirty and I-only-do-one-night-stands-babygirl attitude, you being the idiot that you are took the bait.

-The LoV knows of yalls nights together but they only thought that that was it.

-Dabi slept around and you were a really attractive person. 

-Plus they knew you both were bored so sex was, to their eyes, the only solution. 

-What they didn’t know though was that Dabi was starting to catch feelings and soon enough he hated seeing you remotely talking with another human being. 

-Then that fateful mission happened and the deal was sealed. 

-You were spying on Overhaul and his lackeys, hidden in his underground lab watching as they went around doing stuff.

-Then you heard a childish scream and it was the first time Dabi saw fear flash in your eyes. 

-You turned around following the source of the screams absolutely ignoring Dabi’s protests and threats. 

-It was like you were in a daze and Dabi felt the terror sink his claws in his throat as you passed by so many of Overhaul’s members nearly getting caught. 

-When you reached the glass door that led into Eri’s experiment lab, he saw the color drain from your face and your knees buckling. 

-He caught you before you hit the floor dragging you away from the lab door despite the fact that you clawed at his coat to put you down. 

-He felt his shoulder getting wet and that’s when he saw the tears that were falling freely down your cheeks. 

-He had managed to calm you down long enough to convince you to leave before you got caught but luck wasn’t on your side when one of the lackeys spotted you. 

-Dabi was a few feet away from the exit, becoming reckless at the sight of freedom not noticing the masked individual pointing his gun at him. 

-You noticed though. 

-And you got in the way, pushing Dabi to the ground as the quirk cancelling bullet pierced your side leaving you to fall to the floor with a grunt and a strangled pained moan.

-The next few minutes were a blur.

-Dabi didn’t remember how he got you out of there or how he was now on a rooftop with you pressed flush against his chest as the affects of the bullet made you tremble. 

- “Shh doll, shhh. I’m here I got you.”

-He knew your trembling was not entirely because of the bullet, he saw how your eyes glassed over at the sight of Eri back in the lab and he knew that this had something to do with your past. 

-He used to get the same glassy eyed look on his face when he would see Endeavour on the news shortly after his “death”.

-Things changed after that. 

-He didn’t take you to the hideout that night, he brought you to his apartment where he helped you clean up your wound and calm down. 

- “I know it’s not my place to ask but what the hell to you happened back there?”

-When you explained what you’ve been through and how those screams brought back things you thought you had long ago buried, he was left gawking at you. 

-For some weird reason he believed that you were just a brat who ran away from home on some rebellious whim. 

- “Ugh what am I saying? You don’t give a damn! Why did I even-”

- “Touya.”

- “What?”

- “My real name is Touya, I-I wanted you to know.”

-Sharing a heart felt night analyzing your past trauma with someone you sleep with is one way to get yourself into a relationship.

-You both agreed to keep it secret and you did keep it like that for a long time, a very long time. 

-The LoV never truly found out. 

-Some had their suspicions sure, Mister Compress had even made a bet with Toga but you two never gave them any further hints apart from the constant paired up missions you went on. 

-The only one who knew was Kurogiri. 

-He had caught you two spending the night together on a rooftop, all cuddled up together your hands intertwined as you looked up at the stars. 

-He was getting back from an emergency snack run when he saw the familiar glow of Dabi’s blue flames and your characteristic giggles. 

-He never said anything and when Dabi came to him to ask for some pregnancy facts, he knew that he truly loved you. 

-No one ever knew and no one will ever know. 

-Unless the run into you two in five years while you’re out for a walk with your son. 

Bakugou Katsuki

-Sparky sparky boom boom man is a lil bitch.

-Don’t try to argue you know that too. 

-You just need to accept it.

-His way to approach you was by insulting the living shit out of you before making you reach the tip of an anger fit. 

-He knew how to press your buttons and it made you fume. 

-You had to give it to him he was hella attractive and his true personality shined through his faced at times. 

-And so did his worry for you.

-You got together after his kidnapping. 

-He suffered from nightmares after the incident and one night he came to your dorm, trembling and cold sweat running down his spine. 

-He had no idea why his feet led him to your room, he just knew that you were now wrapping him in a fluffy blanket and putting on a Disney movie as you hugged him so so tightly. 

-He slept over and the next morning he confessed. 

-Actually you both confessed but those are useless details. 

-In reality it wasn’t even a confession with words. 

-You both woke up facing each other, your noses touching and I don’t know who leaned in first but next thing you knew you were kissing his hand cupping you cheek while the other intertwined with yours. 

-Keeping your relationship a secret with this one is easy. 

-He is still being a lil bitch to you and you are still sassing him back.

-Behind closed doors he is kinda sweet and caring not a lot though because even with you he has to uphold his reputation. 

-After some time though he calms down and is a cuddle bug. 

-Like he will tackle you on the bed the moment you close the door to his dorm, restricting any movement until he is satisfied with the cuddles. 

-Baby even said ‘I love you’ first awwww!!

-He was so shy about it. 

-Anyways.

-That’s a story for another time. 

-He doesn’t really care about keeping it a secret anymore. 

-He’s low key tired of hiding. 

-Much like Kaminari he wants to kiss you whenever he wants, hold you and hug you till you can’t breathe after he gets back to the dorms after a rough patrol with his hero study. 

-But oh well the cat isn’t out of the bag yet and you being third years now you couldn’t really do something about it. 

-You spend so much time with him that you would think that some of your classmates would like sniff you out. 

-But no.

-They all dumb af.

-You would spend a lot of time with him and the Bakusquad since your first year so they just think you’re really good friends. 

-Todoroki kinda knows but he doesn’t at the same time. 

-Some mannerisms remind him while he was in a secret relationship before Momo found out but then he sees how Bakugou treats you just like any other person so he is really confused. 

-More confused than usual. 

-Now you got outed by the man himself. 

-Bakugou is not good with jealousy. 

-Jealousy and Bakugou should never go hand in hand.

-You were talking to Mina in class, leaning on the desk behind you. 

-Your skirt had ridden up show casing your thighs making Bakugou think back to some noises you made a few nights ago. 

-If he got hard he would blame you and he would be extra pissy. 

-He was enjoying the show though. 

-He watched you like a hawk.

-The way your body leaned back making your legs straighten and flex slightly or how he could see the hickey he had left right at the base of your neck the other night that you’ve tried to cover with make up. 

-He could see it because he knew it was there, to an outsider everything was normal. 

-He was jolted out of his daze by Mineta’s voice. 

-And the sound of your name on his lips. 

- “Look at Y/N’s thighs! She could suffocate me with those legs and I would thank her!”

-Kirishima smacked him upside the head trying to shut him up. 

-Kaminari was slowly escaping the scene because he saw the small sparks in his friend’s hand at the comment. 

-He chose life. 

-Mineta though didn’t stop. 

- “I could lose myself between those legs. Oh the noises she must make.”

-Now what happened next is a huge question mark. 

-The end result however was Mineta almost being blasted out the window and into space and Bakugou almost popping the vein on his forehead. 

-You had to get in between them and try to calm down your boyfriend. 

-Most of your classmates had long forgotten Mineta and his whining and had zoned in on your hands on Bakugou’s chest or on his arm that had wrapped around your waist in an attempt to push you behind him. 

- “You ever dare speak my girlfriend’s name I’m blasting you to the next dimension.”

- “Katsuki please calm down it’s fine.”

-Legit you both forgot that your relationship had been a secret for the past three years. 

-You floated back into reality when Present Mic himself asked. 

- “YOu TWo aRe aN iTeM?????”

-Chaos ensued and a crap ton of explanations. 

TAG TEAM AY:

@iwaqchan​ @the-arcana-fan-fic​ @angelwritings​ @axerrri​ @reinyrei​

[tainted-wine]

The Spring Bird Survival Guide

Hawks x Reader (NSFW)

(So many of you have asked for a part two of my rutting Hawks fic. I gave in! I have no idea how this holds up compared to the first, but I hope you enjoy!)

Read Part 1 if you haven’t! This takes place directly after those events!

Words: 10k (WHOOPS)

Warnings: None, except for an absurd amount of scene transitions that hopefully don’t get too confusing.

-----------------------------------------------

Tuesday

The chorus of songbirds can be heard right outside of Hawks’s window, their small shapes dashing past and making the peeking sunlight flicker across the bedroom. It sounds like it’s gonna be a beautiful day. He’d be elated, if he wasn’t feeling so ill already.

The fever and itch were coming back, like a hot rash that he couldn’t scratch because it was inside of him. He was really hoping to never feel such a hellish sensation ever again.

He slowly peeled the thick sheets off, making sure not to disturb his bedmate as he sat up. There’s no way the quirk’s effects were returning, is there? Last night, the feeling had only gotten weaker with every passing hour. Now it has returned, not in full force, but once again difficult to ignore. He peered over his shoulder to check on his guest.

You were still sound asleep, worn body supported by pillows all over as if you were in danger of falling apart. While Hawks was healing that night, your aches had only gotten worse. He at least managed to convince you that you were in no condition to drive back home and the safer choice was to stay at his place. You were still wearing the clothes he gave you, while he himself donned only a cozy pair of pants. Such a shame that you didn’t take kindly to his request to sleep nude together. Seriously, what was even the issue? He’s already seen every inch of your body, and in every angle possible.

Every hot, sweaty, mouthwatering angle possible.

The internal fire suddenly rushed to his groin, making him slap a hand over his mouth to muffle a groan. He shouldn’t be around you in this state; might as well get up early and prepare for work.

The moment he was on his feet and stretching, a buzz was heard on the nightstand. Your phone vibrated against the smooth wood as it lit up and revealed the caller’s name.

Ah, the good ol’ deputy.

What that nagging old man wanted was between him and you. It wasn’t Hawks’s right to force himself between whatever matters the two of you had to discuss.

Those facts aren’t going to stop his nosy ass, however.

The phone was snatched from the stand without a second thought, the hero walking out of the room as quickly and quietly as possible before answering. “Mornin’, sir,” Hawks greeted. You were the only ‘superior’ he could toy with; any unruly behavior around the actual important people came with a high risk of punishment. Taking his frustrations out on you has been a blast, but after the bind you freed him from yesterday…

“Hawks? May I ask what you’re doing with your handler’s phone?” The deputy questioned.

‘I completely wrecked her last night. The poor lady didn’t survive.’ He considered the joke for a second, but decided that the stuffy bastard wouldn’t appreciate it. “She’s still snoozing. Yesterday was pretty rough on her. I think she deserves a little slack.”

“That’s not for you to decide,” he said sternly, like he was offended that Hawks dared to make a suggestion. Hell, he probably was. “Well, since you’re here, I suppose I can ask you directly. How are you feeling? Has the quirk worn off?”

His wings flapped and fanned himself. “Oh, so much better, sir! You guys have the best solutions to everything, don’t you? Never doubted you for a second.” Truthfully, if his moral compass was more stable, he’d say that offering an unsuspecting woman to him like some maiden sacrifice was just a little twisted. He can’t help but wonder if he would have refused if he was thinking straight at the time.

“Very good. So you are not feeling any lingering effects? Do your usual rutting symptoms feel stronger at all?”

“Eh…” Hawks hesitated. Should he bother trying to hide it? If there’s anything he’s learned from his mentally taxing undercover work, it’s that half-truths are often the best answer. “Feels like it’s still floating around in me, but nothing to worry about. It won’t be getting in the way of my work.”

“That’s great to hear. We don’t want you hurting your image with any more of your brutish displays in public. Please keep those special traits to yourself.”

That made his lip twitch. It really shouldn’t bother him. The Commission has always expressed their distaste for his more animalistic habits, but fuck, would it kill them to at least show some pity when it’s his very own instincts that are causing his suffering? “You got it, sir.” His calm response didn’t betray his irritation.

“And if you do start having issues, then I recommend that you turn to your handler again. In fact, I was calling to inform her that we have found a more competent individual to replace her.”

Oh. That’s…ouch.

“Really? I kinda like her,” Hawks admitted. It’s pretty awkward to be discussing your possible termination on your phone during a call that was meant for you.

The deputy gave a dry laugh. “Of course you do. She has absolute zero control over you. I was hoping you were mature and disciplined enough to not take advantage of her inexperience, but I suppose I was expecting too much of you.”

Yeah, he kinda was, honestly. No argument there. “So sorry, sir. I won’t let it happen again.” Maybe.

“You better make sure of it. As I was saying, we’ll keep her around in case you are in need of more relief. Once your hormones have stabilized, I will give her the news and you will be rid of her.”

Hawks actually snorted from just how fucked up that plan was.

The cruel man ignored the sound and went on. “Can I trust you to stay quiet about this? I’d rather not have to deal with any constant badgering for however long this goes on.”

‘Totally! There’s no need for her to know that she’s only being kept around to be my fucktoy and then get fired immediately afterwards.’ Man, what an organization that he works for. Too bad they have him whipped and incapable of defying them. “Your secret’s safe with me, sir.”

“Good. Well, this call didn’t go as planned, but it was satisfying enough. I’m expecting you to remain in top condition during your duties. Do not disappoint us.” He hung up without waiting for Hawks’s response.

The winged man didn’t even notice the perspiration quickly coating his body until the phone nearly slipped out of his slick hands. As he returned to his room and placed your device back where it was, he couldn’t help but watch your sleeping form.

You were always cute, he’s not gonna lie about that. Finding new ways to embarrass you on the job became a new type of thrill for him. Your blushful glares never got old.

But he never thought that he’d see you like this, or the state that you were in yesterday. His mind was barely there as he was shrouded in that prankster of a villain’s quirk, but he could still feel you all over his extra sensitive feathers. He was practically drowning in you at the time.

The smell of your arousal. The taste of the glaze on your pussy. The sweet songs of pleasure. The look of overwhelming bliss on your face.

Your soft skin, and your hot wet opening that he wanted to invade over and over again…

“Keigo?”

He doesn’t know when you woke up, or when the hell he crawled into the bed with his face so close to yours that he could feel your breath. “Uh…”

“Are you alright? You’re looking feverish again. And…” You looked down in concern, and Hawks followed your gaze to see the full erection that totally snuck up on him.

“Whoa! Sorry about that! Little guy doesn’t know when to quit.” Hawks scooted away, trying and failing to hide the tent in his pants.

You attempted to sit up, only to wince and settle back down. “Dammit, I can’t believe how much I’m hurting from yesterday. This is embarrassing.” You groaned and snuggled up to the many pillows.

He couldn’t resist planting a kiss on your forehead, ignoring how the brief contact made his hardness twitch. “Sorry, angel. Really wish I wasn’t such an animal back there. Just stay still; I’ll get you some fresh water for your painkillers.”

You look like you wanted to say something, but decided on closing your eyes and trying to relax instead. “Thanks.”

He was already rushing out of the room, heading into the kitchen to fill the empty glass while considering dowsing himself in the cold tap water.

Why, why the fuck was it coming back? Just looking at you was making his vision foggy again. It can’t be his rut; it never made him this excited before. He didn’t have the courage to return to the bed, alternatively placing the cup onto a hardened feather and floating it back to you. He stayed where he was, leaning against the sink and wiping at his face. The heat remained at a manageable level as long as he kept his distance from you, but he wanted to stay close. He had to stay close and protect the woman he was now mated to.

Wait, what?

“Keigo?” He heard you call out and was pulled from his confusing thoughts. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

Hawks gave a laugh that didn’t sound all that convincing to his own ears. “Bad news, babe. I think I’m still a horny bird,” he confessed.

There was a pause. Maybe you had taken a sip. “I don’t know if they told you, but when the deputy explained your…situation, he said that the symptoms of your rut will probably be amplified until it’s over.”

Ah, the old man did mention that over the phone. He only had about a week of his yearly phase left, but if this all means intensified aggression and arousal, not to mention the attachment to the lady he just banged for several hours…

This was going to be a very difficult week.

“Babe?” He said just loud enough for you to hear.

“Yes?”

“…I really fucked up by not taking my meds, didn’t I?”

He didn’t exactly hear your sigh, but it was still felt through his wings. “I’m afraid you did.”

Yeah, this was all his fault. This bullshit would only be half as painful if he was still taking his stupid hormone medication like he has been for years. Not only do these unrestrained imbalances feel foreign to his body, but Libido’s quirk practically put them on steroids.

The medicine’s side effects don’t sound all that bad anymore.

—————

Hawks had already eaten a slice of leftover pizza by the time you finally mustered up the strength to get up. The feel of your entire lower body cramping made you whimper and stumble.

He was already scrambling back in to catch you and hold you up, his high body temperature startling you. “Thank you,” you said wearily.

He froze for a second before jumping back, the sudden loss of support almost making you fall anyway. He wordlessly strutted over to his wardrobe, withdrawing a fresh pair of underwear. 

You looked away when the pants were pulled down and his hardness sprang free. He’s not just going to ignore that, is he?

“Keigo, do you need to…do this…again?” You asked, tuning out the throb of your muscles.

He chuckled as he began to dress himself . “You are not up for more sex, baby. Don’t even act like it when you can barely stand.”

You huffed. “You’re getting really hot again and you shouldn’t go out feeling like th—”

“Nope.” His boner is covered again, somewhat. He stares at the obvious protrusion before shrugging and retrieving his hero outfit.

Even with your aches, you had the grit to push on. “As long as you go slow, I can probably handle it.”

“Mmmm, can’t promise that,” he murmured while momentarily detaching his wings in order to squeeze into his tight black shirt. “The second I’m inside you, I might lose control and shatter your pelvis.”

That’s horrifying, but… “I trust you.”

“I don’t trust me.”

“Keigo…”

“And don’t get too attached to that name, dove. Can’t have it slipping out in public.”

“I wouldn’t do that. I’m not stupid.”

“Could’ve fooled me, since you’ve offered me your tender pussy twice already. Do you want me to pound you into mush?”

“Language, Hawks!” You strictly reminded him, undeterred by your wobbly legs as you tried to remind him who was in charge.

Hawks shot you a look, his face crinkled into furrowed eyebrows and a crooked grin, a look that screamed ‘Seriously?’

“Listen, ma’am, wood happens. I’ve dealt with it plenty of times like any other guy, so I’m telling you that I don’t need to bang to get rid of this.” He pulled up his tan loose pants, the bulge not as obvious, but still visible. “But if you really insist on ordering me to fuck you silly, be my guest.”

You weren’t exactly going to do that, it’s just that Hawks was acting so unfazed by his strong arousal, but his body was very clearly telling a different story. His breathing was heavier than necessary, and every time after he made eye contact with you, it’s like he had to spend a minute to compose himself. However, if he’s confident that he can endure…

“Fine,” you sighed, watching him suit up with more interest than you cared to admit. You hobbled on out and into the kitchen.

“Need help, granny?” You heard him offer. “I can fly you to your place if your legs still aren’t working.”

“I’m fine,” you grumbled in annoyance at both him and your uncooperative limbs. The fridge was yanked open and you frowned at its contents. The pizza and chicken wings were the only real food he had, the rest being sugary snacks or microwave meals. Looks like ‘keeping a healthy diet’ will have to be added to your Hawks Maintenance list.

The flaps of wings were heard behind you as Hawks headed for the door, fully geared up and ready for hero work. “Welp, you’re a big girl that can handle yourself. Drive safely, babe. Can’t wait to hear what you have to nag me about at the office.”

“Hmph,” you gave a smirk of your own when you turned away from the humming microwave. “Probably about the next mistake you make for all of the internet to see.”

He waved dismissively and opened the door, the morning sun illuminating him with an enchanting glow. “Come on, have some faith in me. I’ll be careful.”

Crimson wings spread as he steps outside, but the door closes before you can watch him take off.

—————

Buzzfood.com

HAWKS SPORTS STIFFY ON THE JOB

Written by Yuki Burushito

Now, I know that I’ve been posting enough Hawks-related articles to last a year, but can you blame me with all the weird behavior he’s been exhibiting this month? You probably think that I have a boner for the guy, but let me tell you this: one of us has a boner, and it isn’t me.

Everyone’s favorite hawk was hiding a woodpecker in his pants today. The best part is that it apparently lasted hours, given that it was mentioned in several incidents throughout the day, but the clearest example was when he subdued a mugger at noon, which was filmed by a bystander and is already making the rounds across the web.

Yet another extreme apprehension from Hawks—though it doesn’t top the beating he gave to that frisky peacock—I sure didn’t expect the fast-working hero to swoop down on a fleeing thief and slam him into the ground. I’m certain that a few feathers would have done the job just fine. When the pinned mugger felt Hawks Jr. poking at his back, he lifted his busted face off the ground and screamed, “Is this shit turning you on?!”

While everyone is currently having a field day with that meme-able clip, the answer is most likely no. Hawks was hard before the mugging occurred. Since I’ll probably be writing about him again by...I don’t know, tomorrow, I’ll cut to the chase. You have probably heard the theories that Hawks is experiencing some sort of rut. 

Well, it’s time for me to come out and say that I fully support those theories. “But Mr. Burushito!” I hear you say. “If this is something as regular as a rut, how come he’s never acted this wild before?” My answer to that is: I have no idea. He’s still a rather young man; maybe whatever sexual cycles his body possesses have only started appearing recently.

Honestly, you can never be sure with mutant types. Their bodies never make any damn sense.

“I take offense to that last sentence.”

You didn’t react to Hawks’s comment as you both read the article on your phones. After seeing multiple images of ‘Hard Hawks’, as he’s been nicknamed, taken by several random civilians and shared on their social media accounts, you knew it was only a matter of time before these petty news sites decided to take a bite out of the fresh meat.

Maybe this was your fault for trusting the hormonal bird that was currently seated in front of you while you stood across his desk. The only reason you aren’t scolding him right now is because he already looks so damn miserable. He had removed his protective headphones and visor right after finishing his patrols. A desk fan was turned to its highest setting, blowing directly into the hero’s sweaty face as he tried his hardest to focus on the small screen in his hands. He hasn’t looked at you since you’ve entered the office, but distressed or not, there was a certain matter you had to discuss.

“The deputy apparently called me this morning,” you started, ready to see how he reacts.

You notice him tense for just a second as he continues to scroll through whatever it is he’s looking at.

“It says that I had taken the call, but I sure don’t remember that. What I do remember is that you were awake before me.” Your hands were on your hips, waiting for Hawks to answer to your unspoken accusation. “Well?”

He still stared down at his phone, but it didn’t seem like he was actually looking at anything, his mind elsewhere. “Yeah yeah, I talked to him,” he admitted groggily.

You’re more angered by the fact that the deputy never bothered to call you back, leaving you in the dark from whatever he and Hawks had discussed. “So, what did you two talk about? You know, during my call that was meant for me?”

Hawks finally laid his glassy eyes on you. The energy surrounding him was drastically different from this morning and it made you just a tad anxious. Your body truly didn’t feel up to it when you offered him more sex this morning, but you knew it would be better than him reverting to another delirious state. “In a nutshell, he wants us to keep fucking until I’m better.”

Your eyes widened in shock. “What? He didn’t think it was important to tell me about this?”

He leaned far back into his chair and smiled, beads of sweat trickling down his neck. “Guess not. But hey, you’re doing your job anyway, already serving yourself to me the minute you see a hard-on.”

You glared, considering storming out of the room and calling that asshole immediately. “I don’t appreciate him expecting me to be your personal whore.”

“I know, I know. He’s a real douche, isn’t he? How about we both blow off some steam?” He was already scooting out of his chair and making his way around the desk. “I’m just making one mistake after another. Shoulda just said yes to you this morning. Never pays to be a nice guy, does it?” His voice was sounding rougher with each word, like his throat was changing into a sandpaper tube as he stopped right in front of you.

You trembled, making the mistake of looking down and spotting the erection that was very much still present.

For the sake of your still-burning body, you might need some time to mentally prepare for this. “Alright…but before we leave, just let me—”

“Leave?” Two hands clasped onto your shoulders hard, holding you in place. The raptorial eyes held yours captive, stirring up a heat within you despite your unease. “We’re doing this right here, right now.”

“Wha-I-but-” Your stutters were ignored as he turned you to the desk and bent you over, your back muscles screaming in protest. All of his weight was pressing into you, his deprived cock pushing against your ass.

“And everyone’s already left for tonight, so it’s just you and me.” He’s eagerly yanking your pants down then does the same for his own. 

His fingers wasted no time in groping your sex, the swipes against your folds triggering a steady flow of slick arousal. There should be no one else in the building at this time, but your paranoia still makes you clap a hand over your mouth as you gasp from his sinful touches.

“Mmm, already getting wet for me?” He cooed behind you, his breath feeling like heat emanating from an open flame. “My brave little hen, willing to take as many poundings as she can.”

That’s a pet name you haven’t heard before. Teeth scrape across the space between your neck and shoulder while the head of his cock lubricates itself along your fleshy petals. When he pierces you with a strong jab of his hips, the light nips on your skin become a full-on bite, muffling his own cry. For you, however, the sharp sensation of being filled so suddenly combined with the pain of his teeth pinching into the crook of your neck had you wailing through your hand.

He was already setting a quick pace, giving your bitten area a few apologetic licks before leaning back to properly grip your hips and plow you. Your entire body was rocked forward with each impact, the harsh stroking of your inner walls bringing forth a raw pleasure that you admittedly missed.

But that wasn’t enough to ignore the resurging aches all over you. Your sensitive ass cheeks have become very familiar with slapping against his abdomen, every pleasurable collision also shooting pain up your lower back, and his probing dick was showing no mercy to your delicate insides.

“Haw—ah, Hawks! You need…you need to slow down!” You quavered.

The only response was a series of savage pants and growls as his violent movements continued, informing you that all of his sense and reasoning has disappeared once again. You remember the warning he gave you this morning, and fear that his quip about breaking your pelvis may have been more than just a joke.

You try to twist yourself just enough to see his face and speak to him more directly, but a hand on your back shoves you hard onto the desk, leaving your breasts and belly to scrape against the wooden surface. At least you weren’t fully stripped for this.

How the hell did this happen so fast? He was speaking just a minute ago! Do the after-effects of Libido’s quirk ruin Hawks’s mind that quickly the second his dick touches a pussy?

A moan was being ripped from your throat with every thrust as he upped the speed and force. He was showing no signs of stopping, and your thighs were beginning to cramp. The mixture of colorful pleasure and throbbing pains was making every inch of you shake. His fierce sounds were becoming distant—even with your legs on the verge of giving out and your back muscles crying, you welcomed the fog of bliss that was ready to carry you away.

Your poor legs finally crumpled like frail sticks, only for the frustrated animal behind you to lift your hips up until your entire body was on the desk, arms now dangling over the edge. There was only enough time to reposition your numbed limbs into a low doggy position before Hawks was climbing onto the desk himself, crouching over you and wasting no time in continuing his pummeling.

“Haw…ah…nngh…” Your feeble attempt to speak was quickly squandered. The new angle allowed him to easily strike your more sensitive spots, making your moans even louder. The desk jolted with each powerful jerk of his hips, the feral hero’s wings extending and flapping in sync with his thrusts, papers flying off the desk from the gusts of wind. Through all of the soreness and delightful trembles, you wondered what the current scene looked like to a spectator—the sight of this delirious bird beast, sounding a loud lustful tune of primal urges and carnal desires as he hysterically claimed you.

Your eyes roll back as the hot ripples in your core grow into pulsating waves, Hawks’s unwavering strokes prolonging the intoxicating climax as you quiver under him. You thought you heard a sound from the staggering desk—a snap—but your mind was too far gone at the moment to care.

Hawks tried desperately to keep pumping through your tightening walls, but your delicious grasp on him was draining his stamina. You were gripping the edge of his workspace for dear life, the orgasmic throbs still wracking your body as he rabbit fucked you, ready to fill your womb with the load that has been prepared since morning…

It all happened in slow motion...the sound of wood and metal breaking, the weightless feeling of falling...you had registered it all just a second too late. Your abused body dropped with the collapsing desk, Hawks’s weight crashing down on top of you while papers slowly floated toward the floor. Both of you laid there in agony, the chair somehow falling over and onto Hawks for added insult. A few groaned words revealed that the winged man was fully aware again.

“Augh, fuck…my balls.”

—————

Wednesday

“Here’s all of the completed paperwork, Hawks sir!”

Hawks beamed at the intern entering his office with a stack of papers. “Ah, thanks, Springer! You’re a real lifesaver, ya know that?”

The aspiring ‘Bouncing Hero’ hopped excitedly on his peculiar coiled legs as he handed over the documents. “Thank you, sir! I’m always here whenever I am needed.” He bowed respectfully. “Although, I just…forgive me for feeling the need to remind you, but please do not forget that I took this internship to do hero work, not to sort and fill papers.”

“Don’t worry, I didn’t forget,” Hawks assured him, taking the cursed heap of papers. You were usually the one that he shoves all of his office-related tasks on, but whenever you were preoccupied, he would pass the burden onto a trainee that was too starry-eyed to acknowledge that they were being used. Yes, he feels a little bad, but his hatred of reading endless forms was too strong for him to care much. “I gotta test your patience and comprehension first, then I’ll be taking you out into the field with me. You’re doing great!” He bullshitted with a smile.

Springer perked up at the words. “Of course! I’ll keep doing my best!” His eyes kept drifting to the large empty space in the room. “Sir, what happened to your desk?”

Hawks looked over at the open spot, feigning surprise as if noticing it for the first time. “Oh, right. I banged my handler on it ’til it broke.”

“…”

“…”

The teen searched the man’s eyes for several long seconds, looking for something, before bursting into boisterous laughter. Hawks joined in with his own chuckles.

“You’re very funny, sir! But I don’t think she would appreciate such a joke. Whatever happened, I hope you get a replacement soon!” He bowed again before walking—well, more like skipping out of the room.

Hawks’s smile didn’t fade when he was alone again, wondering where to place the heavy stack in his hands.

Sometimes the truth makes for the best lie.

—————

Pleasing Hawks when he was a drooling horndog was a challenging test of endurance, but at least it was simple and straightforward. All you gotta do is let him mount you and brace yourself.

But that option was currently out of the question. Your entire body was just too damn stiff and sore, every single movement feeling like the impaired motions of an unoiled tinman. Nevertheless, you still needed to get rid of Hawks’s brand new boner.

So here you were, back at his bed and kneeling on the floor, shyly licking at the swollen rod in your hands. You weren’t the most experienced at this, paying close attention to his noises and responses that came with every action from your fingers and tongue. Hawks was watching your performance with an agitated glare, which was just a tad troubling and added extra pressure.

You licked the prominent vein on the underside of his dick, tracing it up to his bulging head before taking him into the hot cavern of your mouth. He groaned through painfully clenched teeth; he seemed to be enjoying it, yet it looked like his frustration was only growing.

Not yet deterred, you began to suck at him, head bobbing up and down while your hand jerked the extra inches that you couldn’t take in. Your other hand gently held and caressed his enlarged sack, heavy and full of cum that refused to be freed into your mouth. His cock was twitching wildly in your throat, so he has to be close, right? Ignoring the burning in your back and….everything else, honestly, you placed all of your focus on engulfing as much of him as you could, tongue swirling all around him until he inevitably gives in.

But a hand grabs your head and yanks you off of him with a wet surprised gasp.

“Stop…stop…it’s just getting worse.” He choked in a broken voice, staring down at the impossibly hard and red erection.

You wiped off the saliva that had run down your chin. “Why won’t you cum?”

His thighs trembled from all of the unreleased tension; you rubbed them to hopefully calm him just a bit. “Fuck, I…it’s like I can’t do it unless I’m…dammit!” The sudden beat of his angry wings spooked you.

You drew a deep breath. You really weren’t up for this, but leaving him in this state would be too cruel. Not to mention it was putting him in a very sour mood. Hoisting yourself onto the bed (with a few pained whimpers), you faced away from him and lowered your upper body to rest your arms, your ass raised and ready for him.

“You know, Keigo,” you started casually, as if you weren’t laid out in such a compromising position. “When I took this job, I imagined the countless situations I could possibly end up in. I was afraid I’d get caught in the middle of some villainous scheme, like a hostage situation. My silly fangirl side imagined going on dates with my favorite hero. The list of scenarios went on and on.”

The man behind you didn’t say anything, so you kept going. “And yet, ‘presenting myself to Hawks so that he can hump me senseless’ was not on that never-ending list.

He gave an awkward laugh, still sounding as if his throat was constricted. “You don’t have to, babe. I can…I dunno…”

“Just fuck me already.”

Hawks said no more and took hold of your rear. “I’ll try to take it slow. I’ll try.”

He tried and failed. Once he penetrated you, he completely lost himself again. By the time he was satisfied, every fiber of your being was dimmed and immobilized. He helped you get tucked into bed that night.

—————

Thursday

“Please, sir. I’m quite concerned for my health. This would be easier if he was away from the excitement of his work.”

After mulling it over, you had decided to be the one to reach out to the deputy, since he didn’t seem interested in calling you again anytime soon. Your original plan was to brave through the fury of Hawks’s dick until this damn rut ended, just like the deputy intended without your say in the matter.

But when you had to visit the doctor for your pains today, and you walked out with a fucking crutch under your arm, you realized this was all a bit much.

At the moment, you were trying to negotiate for letting Hawks take at least a day or two away from work. The deputy didn’t seem convinced. “Hawks once managed to keep working for an entire day with a broken wing and no visits to the hospital, and you mean to tell me that he should rest just because he has the hormonal urges of a teenager?” His snobbish ass questioned.

“This is—!” You inhaled sharply through your nose, catching yourself and lowering your voice. “This is much stronger than that, sir. Without getting into detail, I have withstood some back-breaking nights.” You consider telling him about your recent hospital visit, but the remaining shreds of your pride wouldn’t allow you to share that. Even you didn’t want to believe that Hawks has literally fucked you until you couldn’t walk.

You heard him snort in your ear. Ugh. “Doesn’t sound like anything a steady dose of painkillers can’t fix,” he dismissed.

You gave up making him understand your suffering and tried something else. “Sir, Hawks has faithfully served the Commission since he was a child. He has become one of the most accomplished heroes this generation has ever seen. His skills and dedication have done nothing but help the Commission become a more positive icon all over Japan. Don’t you think such a loyal and hard-working hero deserves at least one day off?”

“No.”

Well, shit. “…Alright, um, thank you for taking the time to hear me. I’ll get back to my duties.”

“Yes, that would be great,” he said listlessly before hanging up.

What an asshole.

—————

“What happened?”

Hawks’s words carry a dangerous tone when he sees you enter his office with the help of your walking aid. It makes you pause.

Going by the sharp yet troubled look in his eyes, you could tell that the tone wasn’t directed at you. ‘Did someone hurt you?’  That’s what he was really asking. His concern always warmed you. “Nothing, I just…” You hate reminding yourself that this even happened. “The pains were getting really bad.”

It takes a minute for those words to sink in, then his eyes widen in some sort of amazement. “Oh.” A flurry of feathers fly off of his wings and form a small floating cushion in front of you. “There, have a seat. Don’t want you hurting anymore than you already do.”

You eye the levitating seat before approaching and lowering yourself onto it. It was like a soft yet firm pillow, and you didn’t miss how the feathers seemed to all shiver, red barbs shaking rapidly as you adjusted your rump.

“Thank you,” you said while resting the crutch onto your lap. Once you were comfortable, you looked at the hero and the brand new furniture between the both of you. “I like your new desk.”

“Thanks. This one is pure steel, much more durable.” He winked.

You return it with a roll of your eyes. “Wonderful. Anyhow, I want to discuss a local hero event coming in two weeks. Your presence would do well to—” you noticed that he was snickering, lips pursed in a strained effort not to fully laugh. “Did I say something funny?”

He shook his head while short amused breaths still escaped him. “I’m sorry, I know you’re hurting and all, but…” He was cackling now, hunching over the desk as he struggled to explain. “I can’t believe I put you in crutches!”

Your face burned with both embarrassment and anger at how hilarious he found the situation. “Hawks…”

He coughed and noisily cleared his throat. “Sorry, I promise to keep it in my pants from now on.” A mischievous grin was plastered on his face. “I mean, I don’t wanna put you in a wheelchair next!”

With a wheeze and happily flailing wings, Hawks keeled over onto the desk with his face buried in his arms, the laughs muffled but still going strong. You just watch with a frown, listening to his mumbled joke about how ‘once you go hawk, you won’t be able to walk’.

What an asshole.

—————

Saturday

Hawks was definitely getting better. You could tell with each passing day, taking mental notes on how he was having an easier time holding your gaze, or how he was able to stay close to you without growing in his pants. Thank god, because your body was still recovering. Another round of wild sex will only cripple you further.

That’s why the incident currently being reviewed on television was filling you with dread. You sat in the main room of Hawks’s house, the house that you practically lived in for nearly a week, watching coverage of the recent attack at the Fukuoka City Mall. The footage of various species of birds flying into the shopping center and swarming the unsuspecting civilians was almost comical, the colorful animals squawking loudly as they snatched every shiny valuable in sight.

A man with the head of a macaw, apparently going by the villain name of Parakill, stood at the center of the chaos, chirping excitedly as his fowl goons showered him in jewels and baubles. His robbery was cut short when small red blurs whizzed into the scene, pinning the criminal onto the floor and chasing around the army of birds until they surrendered their stolen goods. You weren’t prepared for the deafening chorus of tweets and shrieks when the winged hero stepped into the camera’s line of sight.

The restrained villain was cawing and screeching angrily, most likely commanding his birds. You couldn’t see Hawks’s face clearly due to the distance and quality, but you could still make out the intimidating glare as his wings slowly spread out into their full span, each individual feather looking slightly sharpened. Any bird that made a move was quickly poked with a red quill, each and every one of them eventually staying in place while uttering quiet submissive peeps. Parakill’s look of rage slowly morphed into one of fear. Once the danger was surely dealt with, Hawks called for any lingering citizens to leave the area while he retrieved the villain.

You were still in awe as the news switched to another story. Some sort of dominance was asserted there. You weren’t sure how, but it definitely happened. The worrying part was that tapping into his primal instincts like that has probably riled him up. Christ, he’s probably rushing over right now to fuck you into the mattress again.

Only about thirty minutes had passed when you hear the twist of the doorknob and the front door opening. You stand in anxious anticipation. How disheveled and hungry is he going to look? Is he going to jump you on sight?

But the Hawks that walks in is…composed, his face free of tension and layers of sweat as he spots you and offers a friendly smile. “Sup.”

You’re too stunned to give anything more than a “Hey” as he walks past you and heads for his room.

It’s a miracle. No sexual excitement after such a tense encounter with not only a villain, but another male bird mutant? Was he truly getting that much better? There wasn’t enough certainty to approach him while he was changing, so you stayed on the couch and stared at the large screen until he chose to come out on his own.

You were still channel surfing by the time he was strutting over in his loose and comfy clothes, plopping down onto the couch with a wing outstretched and tucking itself behind your back. You gulped—not sure what he had planned for you.

“Relax. You’re acting like I’m gonna eat you,” he teased, watching you flip through the TV’s guide.

“You’re not? I can’t be too sure after what happened today.” You turned to him, watching his keen golden eyes shift and meet yours. The gaze wasn’t glassy. It wasn’t predatory. “You really feel alright?”

“Haven’t felt this good in the past two weeks. It’s nice to be a civil human again.”

You relaxed a bit and shuffled in your seat, fully aware of how his wing was wrapped around your shoulder like an affectionate arm. “About the attack at the mall…” You began. “What exactly was happening there?”

“What, you mean what I did to the birds? Parakill was trying to sic them on me.” He straightened up with a grinning face that radiated pride. “So I rearranged the pecking order. His birds don’t answer to him anymore.”

Your eyes widened in disbelief. “You didn’t. You can do that?”

“Sure can! It’s not that hard. I mean, don’t think that I have a bunch of attack birds at my command now.  Animal control took them in to be relocated, not to mention some of them were illegal exotics.”

“Ah, that’s…impressive.”

“Heh, remember this, babe,” he leaned in until his lips were grazing your ear, his lowered voice and hot breath making you shudder. “I’m always the top bird.”

You shake off his flirting and try to keep your composure. “Right, of course. I’m just really glad that you’re getting better.”

His wing pulled you in for a tight hug that made you squeak. “All thanks to my sweet hen of a handler. Couldn’t have gotten through this without you.” He heard your pained grunts and instantly released you. “Whoops, sorry.”

You rolled your stiff shoulders and sighed. “It’s fine. You’re not the only one who’s getting better. Just do me a favor and try to forget that I was ever this sore from sex.”

Hawks laughed softly as he took your hands in his. The gesture surprised you after experiencing days of rough and impatient touches. “Hey,” he was almost whispering, forcing you to lean in closer to hear him. “It’s been a wild week. My mind’s been all over the place and I’ve put you through a lot. And…” He looked away with his brows pinched in a pained expression, troubled over something you didn’t know about. Before you could ask, his face drew closer, until your foreheads were pressed together. “Mind if I do one more thing with you?”

You were completely lost. You didn’t understand the sudden tenderness, his somber mood, or why he was talking with some sort of finality to his words.

“Let me take you to bed.”

The fuck?

“Keigo,” you leaned away from him, paying no mind to how you already missed his warm closeness. “I said I was getting better, but I’m not that much better.”

He shook his head, bringing your hands closer to his chest. “No, not like that. Just…I wanna do this properly with you for once. Some nice, regular sex. Hell, doesn’t even have to be full-on sex, I just want to…feel you.”

Your eyebrows raised. “Feel me?” You repeated.

He nodded eagerly with a big-ass smile. The normally cheeky young man was acting so genuine right now.

It was hard to say no to that.

“Alright.”

Hawks said no more, pulling you up on your feet and taking you to the room you both have shared for several nights. He was quick in removing your clothes, peeling each article off smoothly before doing the same to his own. The mood felt so different from your other intimate meetups that you couldn’t help but feel modest all over again.

Calloused hands were gently pushing you down onto your back, and you watch as the handsome man above opens up his wings, his eyes closed as if entering a trance.

“Whenever we fucked, I never felt like I was really there,” he recalled out loud, looking more relaxed than you’ve ever seen. “I could feel you, see you, hear you, but it’s like my body was moving on its own. I was in the backseat of my own head.”

With a deep inhale and exhale, he stared down at you with a look of desire, but not the savage kind. You’re not quite sure what it was…maybe the look of a lover.

Fingers traced your face, trailing down your cheek, brushing your lips, and skimming over your well-marked neck. “Now I finally get to feel you however I want.”

Your breath caught in your throat when his lips made contact with the flesh right over your pulse, planting a few light kisses before mouthing at your neck, the random swipe of a tongue making you gasp.

His open wings twitched in response at the small sound. He was trying to savor every single one of your reactions. That’s intense.

He was in no rush, mouth moving down slowly and stopping to observe the bruise near your shoulder. “Damn, I bit you hard. That’s…when we were in the office, right?” he asked.

You hummed and nodded. “Don’t worry, it wasn’t as painful as a fully grown man falling on top of me after ramming me through a desk.”

Hawks chuckled at the memory while rolling your breast around in his hands. “Man, that really crushed my nuts. I swear my voice was a pitch higher for the rest of the night.” He laughed into your tits, licking at the squishy mounds as he took in each of your shivers and moans.

“Maybe, but that was probably just from you crying about how you could no longer give me chicks.” Yeah, that was a weird time.

“Shh, that didn’t happen,” he denied.

“Yes, it did. I had to hold you as you sobbed.”

“Lies.”

“You were worse than I’ve ever been on my perio—ah!” A bite on your nipple silenced you.

Hawks shot you a playful glare, daring you to say more. When your mouth stayed shut, he gave a satisfied purr and sucked at the same perky bud, soothing the sting before moving on to the other.

You felt relaxed; this was all so much calmer than what you have gotten used to. While you won’t deny that his feral side was as pleasurable as it was tiring, at least you can finally take the time to breathe and soak up what he’s doing. Judging from his vibrating feathers, he probably felt the same.

He licked down your stomach while his hands ran down your sides until they reached the purple finger-shaped blemishes on your hips. He winced at the sight. “Ouch.”

“Yeah, ouch.”

He nurtured the marks with his mouth, careful not to apply too much pressure and cause any pain.

“You don’t have to be so delicate,” you hesitantly tell him. “The day you were under the quirk’s influence, you uh, you were doing the same to the bruises on my back…felt kind of good.”

His lips curved into a devilish smile. “Oh, so you like a little pain? My innocent little hen?”

“Shut up,” you said with a blush. “It’s your fault that I’ve felt everything but innocent lately.”

“True, true. I didn’t mean to open you up to the wonderful world of rough play.” His mouth closes around a bruise and sucks hard, shooting a sharp pleasurable burn that traveled straight down to your core. “Ooooh, I felt that.”

You can only whimper as he laps at the sensitive area, but part of you wants him to bring that scary jolt of pain again.

“I wanna know,” he says between licks. “Just how much did you enjoy me letting loose on you? How many times did we do it the first day?”

A few more kisses are laid on your hips before he continues his descent. Your breath quickens in nervous excitement when he nestles his head between your legs, face dangerously close to your hot sex.

“Come on, hen. At least give me a guess.” He turns to your thighs and showers them with timid pecks.

The sheets beneath you crinkle under your death grip. “Don’t know…lost count after the seventh time,” you admit through gritted teeth.

“Aww, what a shame,” his mouth wanders further inside your thigh. “Do you know how many times you came?”

“I don’t know. A lot.”

He bit into you and enjoyed the resulting yelp. “Mmmm, definitely a lot. Enough to knock you out. So sad that neither of us remember just how thoroughly I wrecked you.”

His naughty lips are just an inch away from your nether ones, your breath quickening in anticipation. Hawks looks up at you, most likely enjoying the view of your heaving chest. But he does well in reminding you how much of a bastard he is by switching to your other thigh, subjecting you to another round of kisses.

“Keigooo,” you whine pathetically, feeling your aches as your muscles tense from the teasing.

“Hold on, I’ve got more questions. What was your favorite position?”

“What?”

“Come on, you’ve got plenty to choose from,” he licks the sweat that was beginning to coat your skin.

Both your embarrassment and his tongue were making it very difficult to answer. You stammer over your words while his mouth moves inward, but once again, he stops at your mound.

“You really can’t think of one?” He gives you a ridiculously sad face—large puppy eyes and a puckered bottom lip—it would have looked more innocent if he wasn’t so close to your most private area.

You realize that he wasn’t going to take any further action until you gave him an answer. “I…when I’m on my hands and knees…” You swallow despite the dryness of your throat. “…and you’re on top of me…”

“Ah,” he sighs, and you feel his thumbs part your outer lips like a damp pair of curtains. He stares down at the pussy that he has battered more times than either of you can count, and yet it drips for him even now. The feel of a single finger running down your wetness makes your entire body jerk. “You like it when I mount you like a dog?”

“Yes,” you choke.

He blows on your quivering cunt. “What do you like about it so much?”

“I…you…I don’t…”

“Do you just love feeling like an animal too? Love it when a crazed horny guy humps you into the floor?” He finally indulges you with a long lick from your hole to your clit, and the hot muscle already has you moaning. “Is that it?”

“Ah…maybe…” You answer, and he rewards you with another lick. Listening to his questions was becoming a challenge.

“Hmm, would you love it if I fucked you until my bed gives out? You’re a pretty expensive girl to mess around with,” he jokes. He then dives in, sloppily making out with your folds that have been begging for more gentle attention for days.

Your head thrashes against the pillow. His licks and sucks were both pleasurable and soothing against your beaten pussy. You were finally freed from his powerful stare when he closed his eyes and fully concentrated on eating you out. He alternated between sucking loudly on your velvety folds and lapping at your opening, sometimes dipping his tongue inside so that he can feel your walls attempt to grab him.

The building pressure in your belly has become an old friend at this point, but that doesn’t mean you weren’t excited whenever it arrived and begged it to explode and bring you back to that lovely state of euphoria. Hawks’s mouth was moving more fervently as he drank in more of your juices, as if your nectar was intoxicating him. His deep moans rattled your insides while he smacked his wet lips against every inch of your womanhood, giving your swollen clit a smooch before sucking hard.

“Mm…oh god…Keigo, please…”

He growled with your bud still in his mouth, blinding you with the electrifying pleasure that was only enhanced by the sudden intrusion of two fingers in your throbbing cavern. The slow inner massage guided you to the top where stars burst in your vision, each orgasmic throb bringing forth a shameless moan. The stimulated wings fluttered from the overwhelming pleasure surrounding them, Hawks giving light licks and kisses until you were back down to earth.

“Fuck, that was good,” he said breathlessly, as if he was the one that just got sent to heaven. “You felt amazing, so nice and clear.” His wings finally folded behind his back as he straightened himself and wiped his glistening face.

You were ready to drift away into a happy slumber until you saw Hawks move to get off the bed and spotted the very familiar hardness that was bobbing with his movements. “Wait! You’re…” Your eyes dart from his face to his erection.

“Don’t worry about that; fapping works again!” he told you cheerfully before changing to a devious smirk. “What, did you wanna watch or something?”

“No,” you snapped a bit more loudly than intended. “I…want you inside of me.”

He froze.

“You sure?”

“Very.”

He crawled back between your legs—clearly trying not to look too eager—and was already aiming his cock at your opening. Your nod of approval was all he needed to push inside and damn, that was one hell of a face and moan he made.

You reflexively braced yourself for an immediate pounding, but the throbbing length just stayed there, twitching in response to every pulse from your surrounding walls. Hawks appeared absolutely fascinated by the sight of him sheathed inside of you before looking up to your face, eyes filled with a warm lust, not the unfocused kind that you have gotten used to.

He pulled out slowly and pushed back in at the same speed. “Ooooh, fuck, baby. So hot…so tight…” He murmured with a broken groan. The lazy thrusts allowed you to feel every inch of him stretch you, his veins rubbing against you for added texture and stimulation. Your hypersensitive pussy appreciated the easy pace, and even better, it was also working for the hero above you.

His hips gradually sped up overtime, but never into something rough and aggressive. It was more like a grind, his abs rippling with every deep push. His flushed face has gotten dangerously close to yours, allowing you to watch the pulsating pupils of his avian eyes.

The only time he ‘kissed’ you was on the first day, though a more appropriate description would be that he simply smashed his mouth against yours. Now, as you stared at his parted lips while hot breaths blew onto your face, you had a strong desire to finally give him a proper one.

Good thing Hawks was a damn mind reader, because he brought his lips down to yours right after you finished the thought. They were soft, softer than you expected from a guy that flew at high speeds all day. Then again, he was also a sex symbol that needed to take care of himself.

His mouth was clearly more skilled than yours, so you let him take the lead, lips molding perfectly against yours with playful licks. The added intimacy sped up his hips and raised his volume, his entire mouth engulfing yours as he moaned into you. Your tongue found his and engaged in a frantic dance. He’s tensing up; you give him some encouragement by wrapping your arms and legs around his sweaty form, giving the base of his wings a few rubs. Your mouths part to catch your breaths, a strand of saliva linking your tongues together

“Cum inside me, Keigo.”

“Oh fuck.” Your words have him pumping erratically into you, but you’ve dealt with worse. He buries his head into the crook of your neck, whimpering at your legs that keep him locked in place and urging him to release his creamy essence as deep inside you as possible.

His trembles are powerful, but even better were the cracked whines vibrating against your neck as he emptied himself into your womb. You never get tired of watching his wings lifelessly drop whenever he wears himself out. You cradle his spent body—it’s all so similar to the first time he took you, except this time he moves just a little to the side to relieve you of some of his weight. He doesn’t move you for another round, he just relaxes into your cuddles.

“Thanks,” he says softly, already close to dozing off.

You’re not sure what exactly he’s thanking you for, but it makes you smile anyway. “You’re welcome.”

A wing stretches over you as a blanket, the warm soft feathers doing well to pull you into dreamland as well. Hawks’s heavy breaths tell you that he was already out.

You close your eyes. It looks like you both managed to survive the worst rut of Hawks’s life. This sure as hell wasn’t what you signed up for, but looking back, it wasn’t that bad. Except for the crutch. The crutch never happened.

As sleep claimed you, you wondered what the future had in store for you and the winged hero.

—————

Monday

“I just got fired.”

Hawks flinched at the news, scratching at his back awkwardly. “Aww man, that’s…oof, what a shocker.”

For some reason, his surprise didn’t sound very real. But you were way too upset at the moment to question it further. “Well, I guess it’s more like a demotion. They’re still allowing me into a position I have more experience in. It’s probably back to desk work for me,” You sighed, pacing back and forth across the office in a desperate attempt to expel some of your anger. “But I can’t believe this. I can’t believe that he basically kept me around to be your fucking fleshlight, and then threw me away after you were satisfied!”

Hawks shrugged with an apologetic look. “It really sucks, babe. You can’t forget: the real studs are the Commission. No one fucks more people than them. A lot of us are a one-time use to those guys. I’m just lucky enough to have a longer expiration date than most. Or unlucky. I dunno.”

You didn’t either, honestly. Hawks deserved better. “They’re such assholes, yet here I am ready to keep working for them. I so badly want to say ‘fuck you’ and leave, but…” You trailed off.

Hawks finished your sentence with a smirk. “They pay too well?”

Your head lowers in shame. “Yeah.”

A wing pats you on the back as he laughs. “I’m not judging, angel. That’s probably what keeps most of the guys around.” He steps closer to you, gently taking your chin to tilt your head back up. “I’m gonna miss you though. Whoever they send to watch my ass next isn’t going to be half as fun as you.”

The comment warms you. You take his hand and pull it further up to your face, letting him cup your cheek. “Thanks, but I was pretty bad at the job. They would have kicked me down sooner or later.”

He came in closer. “True, you sucked. But you’re the first handler I got to know so well. Inside and outside.” His chuckle is hot against you before he locks his lips to yours. The kiss becomes more heated than expected—he’s tugging at your lip and thrusting his tongue in and out of your mouth in a way that makes your thighs press together. You tear yourself away from his face, breathless.

“Hawks…?”

His tongue slowly runs over his upper lip. Goddamn. “Sorry, little hen. I was just hoping you’d like a nice goodbye gift. I can give you more, if you want.”

You’re so pissed off at yourself for throbbing in response to his offer.

He pulls you back in and takes hold of the waistband of your pants. “How about it? Wanna get to know my new desk a little better?”

The sounds resonating from the office that morning scarred Springer.