#yes i KNOW some of them have BIG issues but i am not immune to strong women with attitudes

[heleneplays]

just finished downloading some of my old fav classics and you know, looking at the list of games i used to play as a kid & my fav characters in them, me being a lesbian makes more sense

[neewtmas]

Jealous // Part I

A/N: finally managed to write a part II to this

pairing: george karim x fem!reader

wordcount: 1.4k

masterlist

The only source of light that illuminates the kitchen are a couple of almost burned down candles on the table, their flickering light sending shadows dancing over the tablecloth and the kitchen cabinets. I stare at the indents my nail makes as I drag it over the cloth, again and again, in a never-ending circle. The quiet clanking of metal against porcelain tells me that George is still stirring his tea. It must be cold by now.

“When do you think they’ll be back?” I ask, not taking my eyes off the table. Silence. George has stopped stirring, and I know he’s rubbing his eyes behind his glasses like he does every time he’s tired and stressed. “I don’t know.”

I let my eyes wander over to the old clock that hangs on the wall right next to the door that leads into the hallway. The larger, slightly crooked hand has almost reached the top, telling me it’s nearing 4 am. Usually Lockwood and Lucy aren’t out that late, especially not when the case they had set out to solve was such a minor one. Or seemed like it on paper. George and I had been back since shortly after 1 am, the case we had to solve being simple in every sense of the word.

Since then, we had slowly run out of things to talk about, and I had given up on racking my brain for further conversation topics. That’s not usual at all for us, just a few weeks ago we would have never sat in silence for that long. Except when reading and researching in the library maybe. We had been what you could call a team from the day I started my employment at Lockwood & Co, mostly brought together by the fact that half the time, Lockwood and Lucy just had a dynamic that made one feel like they were intruding on something.

It took some time for George to warm up to me, but I thought he considered me his friend by now. Yet here we were, sitting in silence in the dimly lit kitchen, avoiding looking at each other. I wish I knew what had cause this shift between us, but I don’t have any time to ruminate over it. The sound of the front door opening and falling shut and boots on the creaky floorboards make me perk up. George’s eyes briefly meet mine before the kitchen door flies open and Lockwood steps into the room, followed closely by Lucy. They seem exhausted, but uninjured.

Lockwood plops down on a chair, still in his coat, and lets out a big sigh. “Tea”, is all he says, while Lucy scoots next to me on the bench. George gets up without a word, pours two cups from the kettle on the stove and comes back to the table to put them down in front of Lockwood and Lucy, much more forceful than needed. The cup leaves a stain on the cloth as Lockwood raises it to his lips to take a sip, and immediately spits it out again. “Now that’s actually disgusting”, he grimaces, putting down the cup. “Yes, because it’s been on the stove for three hours”, George snaps. “Where the hell have you been?!”. Lockwood raises his arms in defence, evidently surprised by George’s intense reaction. “Calm down, everything’s fine. We had an issue with the cab and couldn’t find a new one, so it took a little longer than usual.” He gives George one of his charming smiles that is sure to diffuse any tense situation, but George seems immune to it today. “Well thanks to you I had to sit here for three hours, wasting my time!” He rises from his seat, clearly agitated. “Don’t expect me to be up early tomorrow.” With that he leaves the room, not sparing any of us another glance. No one says a word, until somewhere in the house, a door shuts loudly. “Phew, someone’s in a bad mood”, Lockwood chuckles as he gets up to prepare a new kettle. “What’s gotten into him? Did your case go wrong?”

I shrug, feeling somewhat deflated. I wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but the fact that George just spent three hours with me only to leave and call it a waste of time stings pretty badly. “I don’t know”, I say weakly, “He hasn’t really talked to me at all today.” Lucy looks at me quizzically. “All week, actually”, I add, and cringe at how pathetically small my voice sounds. We stay silent for a while, until the tea was ready. “Do you know of anything that might have upset him?”, Lucy asks, smiling at Lockwood who hands her the first cup of tea he poured. He sets one down in front of me as well, before he resumes his place on the chair, his own steaming cup in hand.

I search my brain, for something, anything, but I come up empty. “I have no idea. Everything was fine a couple of days ago.” I stare at the cup in front of me. Lucy goes to drop in a sugar cube, stirs it a couple of times and hands it to me. “Since when exactly is he acting like that?”, she asks, and I take a sip. The hot tea burns my lips and tongue and my throat on the way down and distracts me as I try to recall the events of last week.

“I guess since the last time we were at the library, last Thursday”, I say. “What happened there?” Lucy asks again, and I continue. “That’s the thing, nothing. We were just at our usual table, doing our usual stuff, nothing special. Kipps and his crew stopped by for a few minutes and were annoying, but that’s really the most exciting thing that happened.” Lucy sits up straighter, clearly interested now.  “Did Kipps do anything?”

“No. He just introduced the newest member of his team to us, but I don’t recall his name. Joe? Or Jonas?” Lockwood huffs, annoyed just like every time we talk about Kipps and his team. “Johnathan. I’ve seen him once, seems about as incompetent as the rest of them.”

I nod. “Right. Well, when I went to bring back a book, I ran into him, and he asked me out on a coffee date.” Lucy gasps, and Lockwood leans forward, waiting for me to continue. “Did you say yes?”, Lucy asks urgently, and I can’t tell what she wants the answer to be. I shake my head incredulously.  “Obviously not. Well anyways, a while later we pack up our stuff, and on the way out, we walk past their table. And he yells after me ‘don’t forget our date, sweetheart!’. When we were outside, George asked me what that was about, and I just told him he asked me out earlier.”

Lucy covers her mouth with her hand and stares at me, wide-eyed. “Did you also tell him you said no?!”

I shake my head.  “I kinda thought that was implied”, I say, twiddling with my fingers.  Lockwood laughs, and I just look at him in confusion. “Nothing implied that”, he says, raising his eyebrows. “Poor Georgie thinks your going on a date, and that’s why his mood is so sour. He’s jealous!”

My face heats up, and I can just tell I’m scarlet right now. “Why would he be jealous?”, I mumble, embarrassed. “Well, that’s easy to answer”, Lucy chuckles. My cheeks burn at the implications of her words. George? Jealous? Never in a million years would I have come to that conclusion. “But then why would he just stop talking to me?”, I ask, exasperated because Lockwood and Lucy seem to enjoy my embarrassment a little too much. 

“Because it’s George”, Lockwood simply says. “That’s what he does.” A smile tugs at his lips. “I suggest we go to sleep now. Maybe you’ll have a nice dream about your lover boy.” I think my head is about to explode, and I’m not sure which one he is talking about. I look over to Lucy for help, but she just bites her lip to keep from bursting out laughing. “Lockwood is right”, she manages to say, before she can’t hold her laughter anymore. I hurry out of the kitchen, face beet red.

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

"I hate the phrase 'healing my inner child' just state what normal activity you are doing and call it that"

Well I for one am healing my inner child by eating a platter of fish, eggs and fries.

You see, when I was a baby and then a toddler, my mother's number one complaint to my doctor was that I was hungry all the time and if she didn't feed me enough I'd go do something like hunt bugs in the garden and eat them... Or scream for more milk than she could make at all hours of the night, etc...

And he always told her that this was probably normal and healthy for me because I wasn't overweight and humans are primates, after all, but she should try giving me more protein in my diet so I didn't risk eating a dangerous bug, because i was like 2 and would just eat anything that moved.

So my mother took to cooking up platters of chicken nuggets and other meats and leaving the plate on the counter or table for me to find and "graze on" through the day... No word back yet on if this is why I seem immune to salmonella poisoning come to think of it... To the point where if I found a platter of meat left out, I just assumed it was intended for me. I was a literal baby, okay?

Did this cause me to eat the whole platter of fish they caught at a family reunion once, because my uncle ignored my mother's warning not to leave it sitting where I could reach it? Yes. And my mother is pissed at him to this day and annoyed at the whole thing because I went on to eat half a burger and an ice cream cone.

I was a skinny kid. [no one thought to figure out HOW/why]

I was occasionally a fat baby, but then I'd have some big growth spurt and the pain of growing would kill my apatite, so I'd grow in these particularly concentrated spurts where I would go from the smallest of my age range to the tallest, and pack on weight in between to make up for it. The base doctors had to repeatedly assure my mother that I was doing okay so long as it was working for me.

Flash forward to being a skinny preteen. 98 pounds on a good day and already 5'7"

I move in with my step mother just before hitting puberty.

She was raised protestant, and I would later figure it out judging by the kinds of abuse she passed on to us.

She was also paranoid of us being fat because she used to be a size 14 dating mr. america or some shit and felt like she had ruined her life by letting herself go since she met my dad. And her daughter had the genes to be heavier, so she was constantly limiting what we ate.

If I took food from the cupboard after school, it was called "stealing", if I took anything outside of meal times, it was called "stealing" and I was punished for it.

She herself would describe me as "gaunt" when this started and was annoyed I didn't fit her daughter's hand-me downs, but still restricted what I ate out of fear I might get 'fat' or it would "catch up with me"...

During mealtimes if I reached for seconds or anything more that what she felt was an appropriate serving, she tried to use shame to stop me by calling me a "glutton" [literally I know that's a little on the nose but gluttony is the name of the sin she thinks I was committing], even when I tried to point out I was just hungry and was growing, and obviously wasn't over-eating.

She also preemptively slut shamed my asexual ass so hard that when men [yes men he was 18] were inappropriate towards me I knew I couldn't go to my parents about it without being blamed. There were a lot of issues. Nearly all of it her insecurity about us not being her children and religious abuse under a different name.

At school, meanwhile, I was passing out from anemia, but if I wanted steak, or my steak rare instead of cooked to boot-leather and/or wanted more than one, she'd leave in anger to go for a walk if my father wouldn't let her stop me.

I have so many complaints about my father too but props to him for the time he "accidentally" under cooked my steak and wouldn't let her almost literally take it out of my mouth to stop me from eating it.

We went from my mother being poor and doing the best she could to feed us -regardless of what other problems I have with her care- to being shamed for being hungry in a house of plenty. Literally my mother was convinced to send us to live with my dad in part by pointing out how much better they could provide for us... There were always leftovers, there was no argument to be made I was somehow eating to keep the food out of anyone else's hands. Food went bad in that fridge. And I got in trouble sometimes for "stealing" and eating it before it could.

I cannot tell you how much this probably stunted my growth or fucked up my development or added to stress that caused me to start developing autoimmune conditions while I was still in high school.

And imagine if I had internalized that she was right instead of looking at the facts and concluding she was delusional. I got up to being 140 ish pounds with lots of muscle, huge fuckign tits, and finally being stopped at 5'8". I wasn't fat then, even if I hated the girl shaped wiggling, and I am not fat now, eating whatever the hell I want and still being about 140 pounds and 5'8" but not being dangerously anemic and on the edge of fainting all the time. If I was fat it wouldn't change anything, but genuinely the point was that nothing -even based on bad principles- was being gained by keeping me from eating and it was only ruining my health. It was about control, not care. Don't get me wrong on this I don't think the parents of fat kids should be restricting their diet either, but if I was on my way to 300 lb at 14 I could understand my parents trying to be body positive but having genuine concerns I did not need a 2nd steak at dinner. The way they treated my step sister who -was- heavier wasn't appropriate either, it was still about control and it was still unhealthy. But the fact was I was skinny and fainting and I was being denied food -that was left to go bad- when I was hungry.

This started somewhere when I was between the ages of 10-12, but even before that after my dad left my mom and she was feeding us on the salary of a waitress with 2 kids and a semi dependent mother... Remember when I mentioned my sister and I were so unused to large meals we split a happy meal on trips?

So yeah, when I eat a big fucking platter of meat protein to help myself heal and recover I am healing my inner child.

Also my inner teen, and also my connective tissue the fuck that's what food is for.

It is an act of self-care and of protest.

And my inner child is at the surface singing a little song about "eat eggs!", and this is normal and healthy for primates when they make themselves food actually.

RIP to you but I have a platter of fish and lack hate in my heart.

[selfproclaimedunicorn]

For Ella~ ✌️

5//EROS — How closely is their opinion of their own beauty (or lack thereof) linked to their confidence? Do they see themselves as more or less worthy of love or sex based on how attractive they feel?

1//STORGE — Did your OC’s parents love them unconditionally? If so then has this helped them feel confident as an adult? If not then how has this affected them? What were the conditions their family attached to their relationship?

5//AGAPE — Does your OC find it easy to empathise with their enemies? Or do they see it as important to dehumanise them in order to combat them with sufficient determination?

5//LUDUS — What seduction techniques are most likely to be effective when it comes to your OC? Are there some things guaranteed to get them going? Or are they immune to such things?

Kissing your forehead for this. Because you've sent a lot & I can get very wordy, I'm putting it under a readmore

Eros 5

Ella definitely thinks she's beautiful. Perfect cocktail of striking features that are mostly Valyrian (bless my poor valyriaboo daughter) & a pretty solid amount of "you are a hot girl" reinforcement during her teen & young adult years that has her fully convinced that she's the hot girl (& she's not wrong, she's gorgeous imo). That said, her confidence isn't necessarily super linked to the whole "I am pretty" thing, it's tied to her dragon & that will not change. Claiming Vermithor was The Big Thing that Ella needed to unlock her full potential as a confident, very intense, kind of insane bad bitch (in training for part of it, because she was 10 at the time). Like, she wouldn't have had the confidence needed to enhance most of her hotness without Jumbo Peepaw.

And, just because of how her mom raised her, she would think she's worthy of romance & true love even if she didn't think she was hot...but she does think she's hot so that just has her believing she's worthy of everything she wants all the time forever.

Stroge 1

Hoo boy, this one is...weird & complicated. Hi, yes. You have asked about parents for the parental issues fic, lol.

So Lady Rhea definitely 100% loved her 3 kids unconditionally. And Prince Daemon...the thing is, he just sort of didn't engage with Ella. Like, he loved her more as a concept & then just only ever had surface level interactions (especially when she did something that impressed him).

A lot of his "conditional love" requirements were things Ella assigned to him. In a sort of "my daddy will pay attention to me if I do [x], am [y] have [z]." And she wasn't wrong, but she wasn't right either. Doing stuff to get his attention & make him proud just got his attention for a few days & that's really it, then we were back to not engaging a lot because "I don't know what girls like. Girls like their brothers, right? Dragons? I know Rhaella likes dragons."

This is where we get the dragon kinning, "my confidence is having Vermithor," valyriaboo mentality 😅. Weird combination of "my mom made sure I loved myself & knew my worth, & she told me every day how much she loved me" & "my dad did not pay a whole lot of attention to me, but he imparted his weird issues while denying me my gods given right to be a daddy's girl"

Agape 5

LOL, she is not empathizing with her enemies at all--Daemon Targaryen, you are the father. That said though, she has a big heart & can be convinced to show empathy to someone she believes wronged her, but only after the fact & not even in every circumstance

Ludus 5

I don't necessarily think there's a whole lot her husband would need to do besides be pretty & flirt & let her know he's down. Ella is not immune to man with long hair & pretty brown eyes & happy trail who wants to put in effort for her & lavish her with attention.

[olderthannetfic]

https://olderthannetfic.tumblr.com/post/750849271093395456/httpswwwtumblrcomolderthannetfic750157841851

Ppl in the comments: *correcting some shit you said*

You: No but you understand it all wrong, let me back-pedal, so that you're wrong again, bc I'm smart. I did middle school.

Also, you're still so painfully hung-up on a non issue about XJZ being called out for getting into stupid fights with French people, but it's probably less about "any old Frenchie is always right" vs "Specific French ppl who did know better" +- "and are pissed off at a specific person for lying about their history, and being weird about it, while pretending to know it all."

Don't need to be the crowned Royalty of history to get annoyed at people for being big weird about history and writing fanfic about it while framing it like anyone who doesn't agree with them is a big dumdum who falls for ye olden propaganda. Because yeah, some weirdo from across the ocean talking like Frenchies who don't have the same opinion as them about the French revolution + Robesspierre is actually dumb and falling for propaganda does need some mention about them not being French while pretending to stand above it all. "You're not immune to propaganda, but me, who's treating history like my tiktok meme playground, I am above it all. I am smart!"

That's probs my bobs why it was brought up that XJZ is Chinese Canadian, not having any connection to France and just picking and choosing whatever part they want to acknowledge and play with, with only their weird creepo-AKSHUALLY vibes breaking through. People like XJZ are good at being loud and in your face and snarky, but that doesn't mean they're right. Problem is when people think loud and in your face and snarky = being right, it gets real stupid.

Also, nobody tell you that French is a nationality, you can be white or black and be French, you can be whatever and French, you can have ancestors back to the first fish walking on what's now known as French land, or you can be a first gen immigrant, you can be a polkadot horse with wheels and be French. Ethnicity/Ancestry isn't the same as Nationality. You trying to bend and twist it like the only thing this could be referring to, and constantly nattering about the "blood and soil" thing is honestly kinda weird.

--

[satveek]

Jake X MC ~ the proposal

Richy: I am so sorry MC. MC: My forgiveness doesn't matter. Me and Jessy are ready to hide the fact that you were the man without the face. But, Richy: I know. I will hide the fact that the guy who saved me from the fire in mine was Jake. MC: Thank you Richy. Jessy: Will you promise me and MC that all this will never be repeated? Richy: For sure! Jake: MC! MC: Oh no, you are badly hurt. Alan: Who's he? MC: Oh he, he is my friend. He came here with me only and he went inside the mine to find Hannah and Richy. Alan: Is there anyone else inside? Jessy: Richy said that he saw the kidnapper. He got turned down into ashes. Alan: I hope this guy is not 'the hacker' Richy: For sure. He is not 'the hacker'. Lilly have shown us the picture of him. He is not that guy. Jake: *looking confused at MC* Alan: Thomas have taken Ms Donford with him. You guys can go and meet them. MC: Sure. Jessy: Cleo is too with them. At Hannah's appartment. MC: Hello Hannah. Hannah: *Confused* .... Lilly: Hey MC. Jake: Hello Hannah. Thomas: Hannah, the kidnapper made a deal where he asked MC to go in the mine and he will free you and Richy. Jessy: I wish that was true. Dan: We didn't sent MC there. It was Alan and this hackerman. MC: His name is supposed to be Jake. Jake: I don't preferred to be called Jake. Hannah: How are you Jake? Jake: .... I don't know how to answer that. MC: He is confused and tired. He need to go out and spend some time alone. Jake: *More confused* Kinda. *walks out to breath fresh air* Cleo: MC knows a lot about him. Dan: Why is that hackerman still here? Richy: He saved me Dan. Lilly: I think MC should go and talk to Jake. Hannah: Why? Richy: So MC, are you dating Jake now? MC: I wish i could. He is not into me. *teary eyes* Jake: *coughs* I am sorry I heard that. MC: I am immune to you reading and hearing all my chats and gossips. Dan: Does he do it frequently? Jessy: Everytime. MC: I hate it now when he don't. Jake: Really? MC: You lack sarcasm. Thomas: I feel like that wasn't sarcasm. MC: *Blushes* Jake, a word! Jake: If it's a proposal I am ready. MC: I thought and wished you to be the one initiating this but I guess i have no issues with that either. Hannah: Are you proposing Jake, right now? Lilly: Hannah, let her have her moment with big brother. everyone other than MC and Jake: What!? Jake: umm.... guys... MC: Afterwards Jake! Jake: We should clear it off. MC: You are bad with words. Hannah: How you know him so well? MC: I will clear it of for you Jake. Jake: You always do work for me MC. You made everything easier for me I don't know how many of works you have done on my behalf. MC: I will keep doing works on your behalf., but you need to promise me one thing. Cleo: I can't believe this is really happening. Jessy: I knew that this will happen one day. Jake: Guys... let MC finish her sentence. Hannah:But.... MC: Promise me that you will always stay by my side, protect me the way you protected me from the man without the fac. promise me that no matter how worse the situation come you will keep trusting me. Promise me that you will always keep loving me. Jake: *Speechless* *Take a step further and Kisses MC* I will always have your back. MC: *Blushes* I love you. Jake: I love you more. Dan: Wait, what! Hannah: Are you serious right now? MC: I bet on the fact that I love you more. Thomas: We are still waiting for the explanation of big brother. Lilly: Jake is mine and Hannah's half brother. others: What!? Jake: Yes, it is true. I will bet on 5credits. MC: I am raising the bar to 7 credits. Jake: Last time when we did this, you wont the bet. So, this time let us consider you winner straight away. You love me more! MC: *BLushes* .... Jakes Kisses MC Jake: I love you my lady! <3 Some more blushes.

[queenofalpaca]

Oh both Go to Sleep, Scrapper and Bode's Force Background have me super curious for the WIP ask!

Coming right up! thanks for the ask, Anon 🩵

Go to Sleep, Scrapper

This one is obviously inspired by Cal’s chronic inability to take care of himself. It’s planned as a 4+1 though I guess I could make it a 5+1 by just adding Cordova or something, we’ll see. It starts with instances of Greez, Cere, Merrin, and BD trying to convince Cal to go to sleep, and failing. Cal just has too many issues. Stubbornness, nightmares, insomnia, you name it, the guy’s probably struggling with it. The common theme here is that they all use some variation of “Go to sleep, [nickname]” btw, hence the title.

Cue the +1 in which Bode shows up, pulls “Go to sleep, Scrapper” and Cal promptly drops dead. Here’s a little snippet I do not remember writing 😅

It was probably stupid, but Bode needed Cal alive and well if he wanted to have any chance of getting to Tanalorr. He stepped into Cal’s path.

“Go to sleep, Scrapper.” It wasn’t hard to extend his presence just enough to shield the soft brush against Cal’s wobbling shields. He wouldn’t remember this tomorrow. Probably wouldn’t remember it even without the soft suggestion to forget along with sleep.

Cal, predictably, dropped like a rock, right into Bode’s waiting arms. He had to take a step back to brace himself; Cal was heavier than he’d expected. Cal wasn’t bothered though, already snoring away into his chest. Bode huffed and pulled him into a more secure grip.

It took him a few moments to realise that the others had fallen silent, their quiet conversations stopped. He looked up to see all of them staring at him and Cal in various states of utter disbelief.

And that’s it. Just some cute little fluff about Bode finally getting Cal to take a dang nap. And possibly cheating a little bit to do so, lol

Bode’s Force Background

So you know the stony/rocky background going on in the meditation circle menu? This started as an effort to figure out what that might look like for Bode. That somehow split into both Haunting and the fic that’s still in this file, but I’ll tell you about this one (it’s the better one anyway, lol)

The idea is a 5+1. Yes again. I have a thing for 5+1s. They’re just easy to write, what can I say. This one’s angsty as hell tho (good job balancing things out, anon). The thing is, if I post it, this one will probably be called Haunting actually 😂

Now here’s the problem: this one features a big old plot twist. Trying to sell you this fic without spoiling it will make this description rather short. Bode is being haunted by Cal. He keeps catching glimpses of him, but he remains always just out of reach. That’s about as much as I can say.

What I will ramble a bit more about is what I came up with for Bode’s Force/Meditation background, and maybe you’ll even get an idea on what the big twist is. So. Bode’s a spy and he’s very good at hiding the fact that he’s Force-sensitive at all. Here’s my pitch: Bode’s meditation background changes to align to his current surroundings. Whatever place he’s in/planet he’s on, his background will change accordingly to a slightly surreal, dream-like version of the same place. The only common element is water (because the SpyScrapper discord is obssessed with the water/fire thing and I am not immune). In any case, the water. It seems natural at first glance. Rain on Coruscant, the river/waterfall on Koboh, a dripping sink on Nova Garon, stuff like that. But if you look a little closer, it might seem strange that it’s raining on the lower levels of Coruscant. Bode’s ‘true’ meditation background, when he’s not lying to himself and others and trying to make himself fit into his surroundings is a big old lake/ocean. Something something hidden depths, you get it.

And that’s as much as I’ll say (there’s more ideas on themes/metaphors but again, plot twist). One last thing though, because there isn’t yet enough angst: this fic will also feature the post-game Force Echoes. Make of that what you will, heh 🩵

Now for the next ask, I’m gonna need you guys to choose something I can drop actual snippets for 😂 unless you want to have the fics that are still mostly just concepts 😅

[nobodysdaydreams]

LOVELACE IS HERE...

...BUT IS SHE AN EVIL CLONE ROBOT?

Also Blessie is now one of my favorite characters 🌱💕

(or my reaction to WOLF359 Episodes 21-22, mini episode 2, and Episodes 23-24, and mini episode 3).

Gonna keep my intro for this one short and just dive right into it.

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that. And for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs

Episode 21: Minkowski Commanding

Okay. Have I done enough to earn a break? No. Have I done a lot and am complete burnt out? Yeah. So let's do this. I have had a LOT of mutual hype around this episode, so I'm ready to be dazzled.

I'm also eating and work while I listen, so sorry if my notes get short (I say knowing full well I'm gonna get distracted and type insane amounts of notes).

MINKOWSKI? I think this is the first episode she'd done the "welcome to Wolf359" thing. Or maybe I'm just unobservant (I also will often accidently skip the welcome phrase because I press the 30sec ahead button to skip commercials).

Enemy? Being watched? Oh... is this about Blessie isn't it 😂

I love this. We still don't know where Blessie came from and what he wants. Why not take him back to Cutter? Since he apparently loves aliens so much, maybe you can feed him to Blessie. In the meantime I supposed Hilbert will do as a mid-flight snack.

"It took a screwdriver" / "how do we know that's all it wants?"

Uh...

Hm. Interesting. Marks in the vents. I wonder if they are Blessie's.

Oh my this is intense. PFFT- "Slimy thief" 😂

Also maybe it's just me, but unless you have a clear shot and the situation calls for it, it seems to be a pretty stupid idea to be firing a gun off in space.

EXACTLY. Come on Minkowski, you're the smart one most of the time. But I suppose we all have our days.

A net?😂😂😂 This is fantastic.

Maybe they can stop Cutter with some home alone style traps.

"I need to make more acid" oh my goodness-

"The acid may have been a mistake. Turns out it developed an immunity to it. And possibly, an affinity." I'm sorry, WHAT. Hilbert. How. How did you do this.

RETRACTABLE SPIKES IT CAN SHOOT?

And yes, plants need light. But Minkowski, please don't. Please please please don't.

THANK YOU DOUG.

"We admire and support you and we want you to catch the plant monster- this is an intervention" 😂

PLEASE. Doug's imitation of Hilbert's voice and knowing they are the same actor...absolute talent. "You sound nothing like him" (winks at the audience).

Yeah I agree Doug. It is strange for you to be the sensible one in the situation. And again, this feels like you're trying to solve the problem you can rather than the problem that's the most immediate issue. Like getting back to Earth as fast as you can and putting a bullet in Cutter's head.

Wow. That was um harsh. Poor Hera. Oh no.

"Just remember that we're here okay." Aw.

Hour three in the black? This is a dangerous game. I don't like that sound. Florescent moss? Territory marker? Don't like where this is going.

Hilbert: "Ah. Specimen 34. Fascinating hybrid" "I don't care how you made it."

DON'T CARE? I DO. HILBERT: WHAT IS IT A HYBRID OF?

Please tell me it's not a hybrid of plants and a person on the ship.

Please tell me you would not be that stupid.

Can it bred? Is it predatory? "Based on history of parent species" WHO ARE THE PARENTS HILBERT.

Both are possible? Don't like that.

And Hilbert. Why would you make this plant, and why would you make the spiders? Why did you want them to grow this big? What is the goal of this?

Well looks like we'll find out.

Oh dear.

The tentacle is dead?

Minkowski. What about the rest of the plant?

OH DEAR.

Final day? Eliminated tentacles, spikes, and leaves? This needs to end.

HARPOON?

You might be closer to going home if you just...went home. Is Cutter gonna blow you out of the sky? There has to be a way to shut off the ship's tracker or fake your own death.

Found it? Lair? Minkowski almost sounds impressed.

Oh. It built itself a little lamp. A nightlight.🥺 Percival B. Eternal just wants to feel the sun. He must be pretty light deprived up in deep space.🥺

DOESN'T MATTER? MINKOWSKI. STOP.

Minkowski please hesitate. Eiffel is stuck in another trap? Ominous ticking sound? Thank goodness, go save Eiffel.

Oh the plant DOES understand. Huh. Seems like they have an understanding.

But. What was the plant made from?

Sedatives in the tea 😂

Reached an understanding? That's true. It DID have opportunities to kill you. But it no longer wants you dead. Which is interesting, because it did before. And that makes me think that it might want Hilbert dead. Because it took over Hilbert's mind and said to Eiffel "you are no better than the oppressor" so perhaps it blames Hilbert for it's creation.

"It wants what we want. To survive. To make it somewhere. To not be in the dark."

That's beautiful and yeah, Blessie can't thrive in space, plants need light.

Spacecraft? Hopefully rescue. But given that it's season 2, I have doubt. One lifeform.

Who is that? ISABEL LOVELACE? SHE'S ALIVE?

(I say as if I didn't see her name pop up 50x before I blocked the tags...still an interesting way for her to return).

Hilbert you lying liar. Tsk-tsk. Looks like she didn't incinerate. But...she couldn't survive in a pod for a year and a half. So...how?

Is this really Isabel Lovelace?

Is she from the past? The future? Is she a clone or science experiment made by Cutter and Hilbert to trick everyone? Is she the real empty man?

Oh and for the record, I've gotten messages from people asking why I keep talking about the empty man. I assumed that that was a real invisible creature that snuck aboard based on what Hera and Hilbert were saying about it in the alone episode (Hera mentions an invisible unseen presence she won't tell them about, and Hilbert hears a knock on his door and asks "why are you here? You weren't here on the other missions?"), but apparently I've been played like a fiddle. Would for sure fail that psych eval, but it's not even an ethical or standardized evaluation in the first place, so I don't feel bad at all about that.

Also, side note, you know what gets me the most about so many fictional (and unfortunately some irl) "men of great science" who do super bad and unethical things all in the name of their great work? Well, besides all the unethical stuff? It's that most of the time, their "genius experiments" aren't even good science. They're just doing random stuff in the hopes that something will work itself out, usually without any attempt at a control group, sometimes they don't even take their own safety into account, other times they don't even know enough about what they're doing to come to any sensible conclusion or account for unintended consequences. "Oh sacrifices must be made for the greater good, oh genius men like me don't need to abide by ethics" okay well can you at least abide by common sense or is that too genius for you? The point is I don't really care how smart you are, pride cancels out intellect, and at this rate Hilbert and Cutter are gonna get themselves and everyone else killed. I don't think Cutter is even a scientist. He calls himself "Mr. Cutter" (not doctor) and talks about money like he's a business man villain trusting Hilbert to do the science, which, bad move buddy. Bad move.

Episode 22: Mutually Assured Destruction

Don't like the sound of the title.

Oh boy. Two commanders lead to conflict. We're gonna need to establish some ground rules.

Blue ship and red ship collided? Oh Minkowski knows the codes.

"What is the point of an empty gun?" To threaten Eiffel.

Wait..."How did you bring me back here?"

They...they didn't Lovelace.

So who did?

Right, play her the messages from herself.

Vessel to return to earth? Yeah, it does seem impossible. Oh...interesting. An astrophysics figures out how to get back to earth. Then said astrophysicist disappears. What a crazy coincidence.

Oh. THAT'S why they don't have an astrophysicist this time. They want to make sure they don't get that close to getting back this time.

"12 hours later she vanished" ...did she open some kind of gateway, or did command vaporize her?

Ah yes, Dr. Selburg. Yeah he does get sloppy. It seems one of his assignments was to not let them return to earth. But there's a grey door that he opens which apparently allows him to come back each time. Interesting.

Incapacitated him? How? And...how did Hilbert survive?

So...Lovelace was in cryo-sleep and went back to the Hephaestus?

Well...I have a theory: Command sent you back and compromised you so that you would take Hilbert's place as their inside man. Or woman. But it sounds like she's a bit more in the dark about what happened than he is.

Rhea.🥺Aw. A moment of silence for the fallen AI.

Oh yeah. Show her Hilbert.

Yes: "What happened to Captain Lovelace?" Get him commander. Get him!

Oh Hilbert. I hope for your sake this isn't a boy who cried wolf situation.

Oh wow the voice acting of Hilbert choking...true talent.

"They said..." hm. Now that's interested.

"They would never" Hilbert man you are drinking the Kool-Aid, command is using you. You are not indispensable.

Lovelace seems pretty eager for violence.

Interesting...Hilbert terrified of something. We didn't see that with anyone or anything else. Clone or robot replica? Good idea Doug.

I also wonder: was Hilbert always afraid of Lovelace? Or is he only afraid of her now that she's back?

"Is everything a joke to you" at this point, I think it has to be. How else do you survive this?

No long on Lovelace's ship? The computer not turned on before this morning? Then...where has it come from? It's highly unlikely that she would survive in space for three years. But Doug has a point. If these are lies, she should have a better one.

Hera...why are you unsure of whether you can help with the ship? It's hard to tell when she's hesitating due to code interference, having hesitation because the plan is bad, and hesitating because she doubts herself.

Oh yeah...this is awkward. It's like if you discovered another family living in your house and you started touching their stuff (because it's yours).

Oh the music! 📻🎶🎶🎶

Yeah...is there a pattern to the music? Why DO they send that?

Um. Yeah. You might want to drop the plant monster bomb slowly...

Interesting. Hera seems to REALLY not like this new ship. But...why? Again, it's hard to tell when she's nervous, leading them astray, or has a legit concern.

She...she wouldn't be able to go with them. 🥺 Oh. Yeah. They do have families, at least Minkowski does. So...I guess they'd need to go home. But then poor Hera would be all alone. But if they make it back, they could send a rescue party back for her! And she could turn herself off until then or use autopilot.

Ah yes. The empty man. Who apparently isn't real, unless the messages were a code for something.

Uh. Minkowski. What are you doing?

"Nobody's getting left behind" but what about Hilbert? I think he can stay in space for a while. He's been on a lot of missions, so he seems to like it here.

Lovelace. Why were you eavesdropping? Oh wow, interesting gun trap! And "I invented being paranoid" is a very unhinged thing to say.

And explosive device? Lovelace what is going on?

Doug. Doug stop them please. Stop them. What. BOMB. YOU'LL ALL DIE. DON'T DO COMMANDS WORK FOR THEM.

BLOW UP THE STATION! BUT WHAT ABOUT HERA! LOVELACE NO! WHAT ABOUT HERA? WE LEAVE NO ONE BEHIND (well except for Hilbert, he can get blown to bits I don't care)!

Yikes what a thrilling conclusion. And now a mini episode? Seems like a odd time for one. Last time Doug read letters to some third graders, is he just gonna...pause in the middle of this epic standoff to give his thoughts on his favorite movies? I guess we'll find out.

Mini Episode 2: Day One

Interesting this says from "Goddard Futuristics Archives". So they are saving all their messages. Incredibly creepy. Oh this is Doug's first log. Yeah...that's why the logs go to command. Sure.

Yep. It is spooky. Wonder what is making those creaking noises?

Oh poor Doug. Hephaestus is a difficult word, but I would have hoped you'd have heard it enough times by now.

Huh. "Weirdly big for just three people"

...yeah. Almost as if it was made for more people but they decided they didn't want an astrophysicist this time.

"The crew seems nice". 😐

Yeah you DO want to get along with Minkowski. Trust me.

"Dr. Hilbert. Seems friendly enough. Hard to understand what he's saying, but he seems nice enough. I haven't really seen him since we docked here. We've got plenty of time to get to know each other."

Hilarious considering it's the same voice actor, not to mention the irony.

"Creeped out by Hera" and now they are best friends. And Doug, Doug she can hear you. She hears everything.

Poor Hera.

Oh that's it? Huh. Interesting. I wonder if we'll get to hear any other cool logs...

Episode 23: No Pressure

Doug. I've enjoyed listening to you work together for the past episode (which I listened to while folding clothes, sorry for the lack of live reaction).

But Lovelace tried to help you! A fake emergency sounds like a scary idea. She's already on edge. And something tells me that this might lead to a REAL emergency.

Hera. Hera. What is this? This sounds like a very very very bad idea.

Plan B? Hopefully just talk to Lovelace nicely? I don't like this. They were getting along so well! The moth joke was nice!

I do not think this is gonna go well.

"Shut up" good for you Hera.

"This is gonna end well."

I don't think it will.

Episode 24: Tactical Brain Damage

I love the title. But I'm nervous.

Oh boy. Hera. "Communications officer who shall remain nameless" 😂😂😂

"We want her distracted not murderously enraged".

Then maybe this is a bad idea. Wait what? Hera what are your sensors picking up?

This isn't gonna end well is it?

I wonder if Lovelace is treating Hera like that because she reminds her of Rhea. Or however it's spelled.

Big red cable? What does that do?

Yeah. Maybe this isn't the best idea.

Oh. Eiffel is the alternative. Well then.

"Permission to speak freely sir" maybe it's just me, but it's odd that Eiffel calls them sir instead of ma'am. Is that a thing in the military or does Doug just not know the feminine version of the word and no one has bothered to correct him.

"What does Hera know" A lot. Yeah Lovelace. You need to show Hera some respect. She's really nice.

"Well educated guess". I do not like this. I do not like this at all.

Um...HERA? HERA.

Uh oh. Oh no. Don't like that alarm. That's a pretty bad alert.

Um..."I just went some where didn't I?" ...WHERE DID SHE GO? Oh dear? Corrupted code?

"Do you think she'll notice" 😂

I love that despite nearly dying every single episode, they keep their humor. I hope they survive this, but I doubt it.

I hope they at least get a half decent ending and drag Hilbert and Cutter down with them.

"What are the other two doing?"

Oh no. Lovelace is gonna snap.

"You're wrong" "I'm not. But that's okay. Because you still have time. Because my way is the only way."

...Lovelace. Lovelace please be reasonable. Don't forget who the real enemy is. And Doug. You might want to work on your trickery skills.

"Ow" "...is this hurting you?" Oh dear. Poor Hera.

"Would it hurt you?" "Is there a risk of permanent damage?" "Yes."

It's not worth it. It's not worth it. Poor Hera. Good job Minkowski, take care of the crew.

"I know you won't let anything happen to me". Oh okay. It's okay. I didn't need my heart.

And Hera is okay!

haha...yeah Eiffel's plan didn't exactly work out. Please don't antagonize Lovelace.

No. NOT HILBERT. DO NOT GO TO HIM FOR HELP EVEN WHEN HE TRIES TO HELP HE HAS BEEN NOTHING BUT VERY UNHELPFUL.

Mini Episode 3: Variations on a Theme

"The more things change, the more they stay the same".

This would be very scary. They are all gonna need intensive psychotherapy after this.

"Rhea checked in with me, that was then this is now. Hera's polite, her programming forces her to be, but I hear what she's really saying..."

😂The impressions. It's also sad that she misses Rhea.

Breaking bones, tossing her out an airlock, and leaving her to die??? Lovelace, Hera might be cold to you, but the feeling seems mutual, and she doesn't want you to die. The only person she's tried to kill is Hilbert, and if they stopped her from doing that, what makes you think that she'd try to kill you? That sounds wayyyy more like something Cutter would suggest. Where has he been anyway?

"More or less angry if she knew the truth?"

IF HERA KNEW THE TRUTH ABOUT WHAT? Does something terrible happen to the AI units? Is she a copy of someone's brain or personality from a previous mission that Lovelace hates?

Normalize explaining things instead of all this ominous foreshadowing. And I know, okay, I know, when I write my own stuff, that's all I ever do. Call me a hypocrite if you want.

This is very creepy. She's lived through this so much and in space there's not much sense of time.

Oh right. Lambert was the communications officer right? Hilbert must have given him the virus too.

But um...didn't he die a horrible painful death?

"But does he know how it ends, what happens when he gets-"

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HE GETS WHAT? WHAT DOES THE VIRUS DO?

Any more ominous hints you'd like to drop Lovelace? I get the feeling you have quite a few.

Hera, Rhea. Yeah they are anagrams. I got the spelling right! It's also an anagram for "hear" which makes the "I always hear you" line more powerful.

"Everything...except him. He never goes away. He never changes."

...Hilbert or Cutter?

Oh Dr. Hilbert. Yeah. I wonder why he never goes away. And I don't think either of them feel much of anything at all.

"Stay way from the ghosts."

Easier said than done.

"You can never go home. You were home. And now you're back. And you can never go back."

...DID she get back? Did they wipe her memory and send her back?

"No friends no trust no safety"

WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULD TELL THEM WHAT YOU KNOW.

In fact, I think they should all spill all their secrets. Out in the open. That way command has nothing on them.

But for some reason, I think it might be a while before that happens.

I think that's it for today guys, but I hope you enjoyed this. Thanks for reading!

[ctrsara]

Things I've Been Reading

Some of these are newer, some are older and I just barely read them. This is not EVERYTHING I've been reading and liking, obviously, but just a quick share!

(Also, if you know these authors are on Tumblr, but they're not tagged, please let me know, or let them know or something, so I can be friends with them and tag them!) (RECS below cut)

Iron Dad: Coming Home by JAWorley:

This is one I didn't try a few times because I didn't think I was interested in Peter hanging out with Toomes. However, I'm so glad I finally tried it, because it was fantastic, and a really different take on the whole Homecoming era. Published:2023-01-02Completed:2023-02-26Words:114889

Shake My Hand (And I'll Forgive You): by Frogdottir: @frogdottirwrites

Post NWH, Peter has been doing work for the Bugle, trying to stay afloat, and suddenly discovers Tony is alive. However, it seems like even before everyone had forgotten him, everyone close to Tony had been aware of it except him. He is hurt and angry and freaks out just a little bit. Incomplete, but 13 chapters so far, and so good! Published:2022-12-20Updated:2023-03-03Words:40572

Atlas Held by Grumperella: @grumperella

After an explosion brings down a building on top of them, Peter is the only thing between Tony, Natasha and certain death. Trapped under rubble together, well... nothing builds bonds like shared trauma. This one was super angsty, but so, so, good! Published:2023-01-07Completed:2023-01-08Words:8401

Distracted By a Dime by happyaspie: @yes-i-am-happyaspie

This is an older story, but I just barely read it, and she's been adding to the series lately. :) Peter Parker thinks he has everything figured out. Where he can eat, sleep and make a little bit of money. What he needs to do in order to continue attending Midtown and being Spider-Man. The Stark-Rogers family throws a wrench in his plans.

Tis the Damn Season (for a Christmas Miracle) by peacockgirl

Yes, peacockgirl really did write an AU of her own story (Long Story Short (It Was a Bad Time) Or AIs Don't Forget,) which is one of my favorites, and it's amazing, too. Highly recommend! Morgan just wants her big brother to come home for Christmas. Tony just wants to figure out why being around his daughter is sending him into a tailspin. And Peter just wants to survive his first Christmas alone without freezing to death in a graveyard. Luckily Morgan Stark is very, very stubborn. And immune to Strange's spell. Published:2023-01-31Completed:2023-02-27Words:23468

Oxygen and Gravity by for_the_night: @imyoursavinggrace (also, btw, people who have different tumblr names and ao3 names make me think I'm going senile. I have the hardest time remembering who is who sometimes!😂 )

A really cool Irondad soulmates AU (Sentinels and Guides) that I just re-read and loved again. It's not complete, but close. n a world where Senintels and Guides are dying out, Guide Tony Stark was very happy just living life without the responsibility of some Sentinel, but when one touch awakens a soul bond with a scrawny vigilante from Queens, Tony’s life changes forever. Published:2021-11-15Updated:2022-06-24Words:28459

A Big Security Issue by FotiBrit: @fotibrit

Short, cute, and amazing! When Peter lost his Stark Industries Staff ID, Tony handed the kid his own. That was never an issue, until Peter had to check in at the front desk. Published:2023-02-01Words:1828

Make it a Good One! by zippe

This one was kind of a unique fix-it/time travel that I found looking through the @irondad-creator-awards categories, so here's another plug for those! Tony and his mess of a fairy god spider who can’t seem to keep himself moving correctly along the timeline. Published:2022-05-08Completed:2022-07-08Words:31435

Where the Love Is by SpaceCowboysFromMars: @spacecowboysfrommars

This one was super different and interesting, and I kinda wish it could have continued. I've never seen the movie, so it was a new story for me. The Way Way Back AU where Peter is reluctantly dragged by May and her new asshole boyfriend, Quentin, to spend the summer in Cape Cod. Summer gets a whole lot more interesting when Peter makes friends with the eccentric manager of Water Wizz, who seems to take a liking to Peter in all his teenage-awkwardness glory. Published:2023-01-12Words:12948

In a Different Light by kingdomfaraway: @asyouleft

An amazing short one! Peter is taken, and Tony finally uses the phone Steve sent him. He needs help, even if it means making night with his former friends and teammates.

And a bonus:

home (is where my heart found exactly where I'm supposed to be) by ironfidus @ironfidus

Another one I found looking through the Irondad Creator Awards categories. So, so sweet and hit all the irondad feels I wanted on that particular day! Six thousand miles away from the city that never sleeps, across continents and on the other side of the North Pacific Ocean, Tony relearns the meaning of home—as redefined in his eyes by a stubborn teenager with a penchant for recklessness.

[scattered-irises]

hey i’m trying to get into breeding bishounen (before you attack me, hear me OUT!!!)

would it be ethical to breed kaitos

Hi stockholder!

Breeding bishounen is a big responsibility! The cleanup and body disposals afterwards tends to stack up, especially if you're planning to go large scale. I hope you have at least 5 acres of land to start off!

Breeding bishounen has always been controversial, since it always results in at least one bishounen's death. However, if you're not worried about that, its ethicality boils down to what breed you plan on breeding!

For a Kaito, the short answer is a hard no <3. More details beneath the cut.

Straight up, it's just not ethical to bring a tall, self-assured, powerful Yu-Gi-Oh! rival into the body of a wet-eyed, big headed, short-legged, sickly creature.

Especially when Kaitos know what they were supposed to be like instead of what they actually are.

The diseases they're prone to are also too many to justify further breeding (in their quest to create a smaller and more apartment-friendly Yu-Gi-Oh! rival bishounen, breeders also ended up eliminating this bishounen's normal immune system).

He's also got abandonment issues...

I also think it's just plain cruel to bring another Kaito into this world because he's just goofy looking and people will make fun of him no matter what :(

There have been pushes by the official rival breeders (Konami) to make the Kaito healthier though!

Improved skull structure for better breathing, more muscular legs, a proportional neck...Konami is trying their hardest to right their past mistakes!

However, some people still prefer the squished skull and bug-eyed Kaitos of the 2011-2014 era and these unhealthy genes are still being heavily passed around.

In the end, the issue of ethicality falls more on your personal preferences for which kind of Kaito you want.

On my end, yes, I still regularly breed "cute" little suffering Kaitos from the Zexal era. However, they aren't for public sale to ensure that they won't pass their harmful genes to other bishounen populations. Furthermore, the CCF Kaitos' genes have deteriorated so badly now that they only live for a week so no great harm can truly be done :/ If I stick them in the fridge, they last a little longer.

All in all, the choice is yours, stockholder. I am simply saying that you should weigh all of the consequences before you breed them. Happy bishounen raising!

[the-firebird69]

And they're gonna do this Russian thing but it's not us and he knows. This is great I never thought we'd ever see the day. Never thought we'd see him doing what he did was amazing mostly worked in Africa and he knows people have to watch there and he's been working on it himself he says when you're working even at the deli and I think you were there somehow and I was there a little bit not behind the counter but yeah. That was nice well you know it was kind of rough there. Yeah just working and then all of a sudden the day is over it's not that bad I'll tell you what that's a lot of work for a kid and his body is out of a three year old child. So I checked on the other dates the dates are like this when he was younger he did a lot of this medicine and stopped and wore off a lot of it faster than usual so they overloaded him and they put it into things that would preserve it does he have to keep pumping in full of this stuff and it made him sick so they eased off. And they started to pump in full of it and now he is full of it yeah both ways. So we're having a good time talking about what would sound like I guess that's women in general. Says I had no idea I was a waiter and now that day is here. So we have a lot to do and yeah we hold the track speed record globally that's women by the way in his car that she helped design and he made some components to make it very fast we built them of course yeah we did and no they're not go karts too fool. Are men helped that gives you any strength it says good they made the mig he I said And we were involved in that yes. That sucks goes fast and missiles like that are fast almost the fastest. So we begin off talking about his timing the inhaler believe it or not is worse than the Prilosec. And he didn't take that much of it. Good for about a year a little less I was about 10 months. And Varney assigned it and she's a bird brain. Didn't know what she was doing and she says the Max R over the top and we won't have our opportunity to make him big until afterwards and she said boy that sucked. Tried to get you off it managed to get you off Prilosec start getting beat up and it's been working at it ever since. Others are helping and they noticed why but these guys seem to have lost it completely. It's a nightmare. And really healing is an issue it's hard and you keep saying it found out the nuts work but they give you a little diarrhea if you don't do it right. We figured that out too and you need to eat some stuff or you need to use pepto. So we're probably three months away from the inhaler which is a steroid but the type of steroid is limits your growth and actually reduces your immune system a little so he's cranking the immune system trying to and it seems to be working and he's sitting there thinking it is and it is still lagging because he saw because he is sore from working out for too long we noticed it too and lifting the bike up and strained himself I'm dancing as a hero and we say you're not and he says I am and because what'll happen later and he's actually a mess and a very gifted person

ctd

[motherofkrypton]

Mental Health

Why is there soo much stigmatism when it comes to mental health? We preach about caring for our physical with immunizations, physicals, dental appointments, nutrition and cancer screenings. But what about our brain? Our brain plays such a huge role in everything that we do...when parts of it are damaged it affects other parts of our being as well, if our brain functions a bit differently that is something important to know. Yet more often than not, this comes from adults, mental health diagnosis' are referred to as "being labeled" or a person makes a remark that the person diagnosed "has nothing wrong with them". To that extent I do agree, in saying nothing is wrong with the person, because while they have a medical condition there is nothing wrong with who they are. But once the person displays those same issue later in life, people want to act as if it was something that suddenly happened. Just today I experienced how some people are about mental health and I simply stopped the conversation.

It seems that we praise the findings/lack of findings when it comes to physical ailments and if treatments are going well, we congratulate the person. When someone struggles mentally things such as: you just have to pay attention; you're not trying; you're lazy; your emo; you just want attention; you're faking it; mental illness is fake; you don't look like you have *enter any mental health thing* or my personal favorite "why do you want to be labeled?"). People turn caring for your mental health to be something negative. Even parents sometimes will ignore the genuine issues their child has because they don't want them to be "labeled". A diagnosis is not something that should be seen as a bad thing. It allows for those around the person to be able to help them in a way that will actually help the person. The student failing because their mental health is being ignored is saddening. No child should have to endlessly struggle and be behind everyone else simply because their parent doesn't want to seek help. It is not something that is the parents fault either.

Today was a very big day for my little girl in the right direction of finally getting her help in school! My kids' school won't do a learning plan of any kind without a formal diagnosis stating that the child needs help in school. For me, the way she is has never been a problem. Yes, my little fighter has for sure been more difficult than my other two have been, but she is who she is. I am glad that I stepped in and said no... she needs help, and she is going to get it. Her grandparents, as well as her father, see a diagnosis as a label too (hence why I stopped my conversation today). Normally she mellows out a little if she has something with caffeine in it and of course with her appointment being in the morning I wasn't letting her have any. This resulted in her bouncing off the walls at the appointment, not listening and just being as she would at home. In school she is trying so hard not to get a sad face at the end of the day that they only see the distraction part of the problem (the energy release happens as soon as I get her from school). After being with us for an hour, just watching my daughter while we talked about her, the psychiatrist said that she for sure has ADHD and that she might possibly be high functioning autistic as well. She wants to see if we can help her gain skills that will be helpful in school, increase her focus and just generally slow things down for her a little bit. Not sure what I need for the school but that is my next step (the office has you pay for any paperwork) and I'll be in contact with them once break is over.

[th-inprogress]

Tw mensuration; I really am feeling the immediate universal consequences of not letting go of things that do not serve me currently tbh. And also the immense and simultaneous rewards of doing that. to elaborate, I started my period today in the middle of the day today at work. I usually start early in the morning and it’s kind of pissing me off that it’s been abnormal lately. anyway, not the point. I woke up feeling totally fine, no mood impact, no cramps. Usually I can feel it coming. I’ll get cramps well before it arrives. But today, I didn’t start cramping until maybe a couple hours before I went to the bathroom and realized I was bleeding. And even then they were more like slight discomforts than cramps. And the pain didn’t get extremely bad until several hours later. And I didn’t have my medicine with me bc I wasn’t expecting it. Not a huge deal, though. I always have tampons, and it wasn’t long til the end of the day. I talked my after work plans into cancelling. Less talked and more just, brought the idea into existence by asking if they wanted to postpone til next week, and they said yes because it was a long week for them as well. I was still going to go if they wanted but I brought the possibility to light. I have such an abnormally socially busy week this week, it was relieving to be able to let go of that. Even though I could have pushed through and gone and enjoyed the experience and time with someone I love, it feels good today to be able to make peace with my choosing not to. I went home and took a long bath with some cramp relieving Epsom salts and took some medicine and read, and cleaned up and did some laundry and the dishes. I feel so at peace. I haven’t felt so peaceful in so long. I’m looking forward to my plans this weekend but I’m glad I got an extra moment to recharge and renew myself so I can enjoy things more. On the other hand, I’m hanging on to something that draws energy from me, that I don’t really need, and that would probably improve my life in a drastic measure if I could let go of it. From a logical standpoint, I guess my life could also worsen dramatically if I let go of it too, but I feel strongly that the first would be my perception. I guess it’s a trade off of sorts. It’s a job. A strenuous, time consuming, stressful job. Although the stress isn’t much of why I want to leave it. I love the work. But the time is eaten away. And I am physically worsened in some ways because of it ( hands and nails are in bad shape because of the nature of the job ). My mental health suffers from it. Especially if I am already tired, sometimes it is hard to want to be there. I just have so many other things to do I feel it’s a waste of time, and sometimes it feels as though no one else there wants to be there either and I’m doing all the work. Or I’m in such a poor mood I do the work horribly. There’s always some issue. In another sense, it helps my mental health. I like most of the people I work with, and I like my customers and I love coffee and it feels like a second home to me after all these years. I’ve met some of my favorite people. I’ve made so much progress on myself. It’s become part of my identity and it’d be tragic to lose that. I’m also kept busy by it. In a physical sense, I stay active by working in fast paced environments. Sure I could trade some of this time out for the gym, in order to stay fit, but I’d be bored to shreds and I hate working out just to do it. I like to have more purpose in my activity. Which is another reason this job is so good for me. The time I could be spending somewhere else is possibly capable of being wasted. And at least here I get paid. The thing is do I think I’m in a space where I will use the extra time to improve myself in a way that makes the extra income not worth it. Of course I know I don’t inherently need the extra income, it certainly doesn’t hurt. I could have a big emergency at any time. I’m not immune to the random and unfortunate way of life. I’m fighting an ingrained characteristic of paranoia. The other foot is always about to drop.

It feels impossible to let go of the sense that I’m better off suffering from exhaustion than living. It’s hard for me to have the mentality of “who cares if you make a lot of money if you never spend it” in the sense of money and in time. I never have time to spend. I work so hard but I barely have time to enjoy life. I do enjoy the parts of it I have, but I just imagine I could enjoy more and do more with more energy and time, and yet. I fear that I wouldn’t. I would waste my time, and my energy would remain low, and instead of being able to say, oh I’m just tired because I work a lot, I would have no excuse. I would simply be miserable and poor. And it’s hard to know what the truth is.

[lordoffireandflame]

Angry opinions on Downpour

Downpour was fun, I have angry opinions on it.

I think a major issue with Rain World: Downpour is that it spits in the face of the old game's themes. Like, when you play the old game, you FEEL helpless, you're a reasonably intelligent tool-using prey animal that is in an environment that your species isn't suitably acclimated to and you will die if you don't adapt.

I've seen people argue that the reason why the other slugcats are so overpowered is because an iterator made them so, but that just has has the same vibe as 'a wizard did it'. The Hunter made sense as essentially a supersoldier compared to the other slugs, it wasn't overpowered, you were still hunted, but you were reasonably fast and strong.

The ones that make the most sense are Rivulet (Rivulet should have just been able to breathe underwater and not just thirty seconds, the stress should have been on the more advanced water predators, not the drowning. Hell, have the Rivulet be immune to leeches) and the Saint (at least until it got God powers).

Other issues:

Artificer just feels like it was made by a guy who didn't know how to behave around scavs, died one too many times and coded in this abomination. This was the only campaign I never finished (unless you count the modded attempts). The story feels infantile and pathetic.

Gourmand's okay. I hated the story, though. Not much else to say here other than it feels too... well, 'feel good' for Rain World.

Spearmaster was ok, the only slugcat where I actually killed a red lizard with just spears.

The Saint was so fun, zipping around the structures was legitimately the best part of the game. WTF was the rubicon, though.

-Okay, I need to talk about the new Survivor and Monk endings. The base game is extremely nihilistic and vague, there's barely any good feelings here. And that's okay! Art doesn't really have to make you feel happy or satisfied. The new endings completely change the tone of the base game and, as said before, makes everything all 'feel good' instead of the enlightened struggle in the base game.

They gendered No Significant Harassment D:

Just the plot holes in general.

I actually liked the idea of Five Pebbles missing the ancients in his cities, but it clashes with what Moon said in the base game. You could make the argument of faulty memory or just being unreliable but... I don't see any reason as to why she would specifically be wrong about that one specific detail when we believe everything else she says.

Bad dialogue, 'And as your Big Sis, you know how protective I am of you!~' for example.

Honestly, I really don't like Five Pebbles' characterization here. In the base game he is best described as cold, condescending, but overall polite. He only turns rude and extremely patronizing during the Monk's campaign while barely keeping that veneer of helpfulness, he's annoyed and tired and wants to be left alone. I get his behavior in the Spearmaster campaign, but the others? Ehh... he's just kind of an asshole. Especially towards the Gourmand. I get it, Gourmand is showing obvious signs of gluttony, but if Five Pebbles was insulting the Gourmand for that sin, he should have been just as cruel towards the Artificer (yes, he calls her a barbarian and a beast a few times, but that isn't enough) for embodying violence.

My god do I hate the developer commentary. 'We didn't want to make out Five Pebbles to be seen as a villain, we wanted to make him morally ambiguous ' yo, anyone who has ever played the game and has read the lore knows Five Pebbles is morally ambiguous. Don't think we're stupid.

Looks to the Moon felt flanderized as well. People make her out to be some 'nice girl' in the base game. She can be nice, but she is still an iterator and has the similar attitudes Pebbles has. A better description of her is that she is polite, not necessarily nice. In the DLC she's turned into... well, I don't really know how to describe it other than it feels like the character traits the fans hyper fixated on got more and more exaggerated.

I don't like the new Echo names, they make too much sense. The base game Echoes' names seemed nonsensical, and that was part of their charm.

Honestly, I don't really feel like a small animal trying to adapt to an unfamiliar environment, I feel like the hero or a villain, which isn't what Rain World is about. It's about survival and adaptation that ultimately leaves to enlightenment.

There's more to say, but I'm done for now. I enjoyed the DLC, but the story issues were glaringly obvious the more I thought about it. The accessibility options were a good add on, but the story and characters. Saint was the best one by far.

Yeeks <3

[thebibliosphere]

Hi Joy! So a whole back (like, I think years now) you and a lot of the disabled community rightly went off about reusable straws & how they aren't a fix all for replacing disposable straws for several reasons but specifically: cleanliness. It struck a chord in me, and I know more places are slowly taking on the No Straws thing so I am always on the lookout for reusable straws that would be able to be sterilized or at least scrubbed & verifiably clean with no nasty bits or mold being able to grow in it because they won't dry.

I've been trying all sorts lately (metal, plastic, a few wooden ones) and yeah, none really fit the bill. It kind of became a thing so now I just gravitate to new-looking reusable straws when we are in any store that may reasonably sell such things.

A few days ago, Hubby & I were at Ye Olde Walmart out of desperation (supply chain issues wheee) and I saw these on an end cap and the first thing out of my mouth was "OMG I need to show these to Joy!"

Cue a brief explanation of who you are and welp, into the cart they went. I believe they were $5.99, possibly $6.99, I have since lost the receipt.

May I present for your consideration: The Squeaky Clean Straw

-

The big selling factor is you can open them to clean them! The pics were taken a few days ago. I have used one so far (after washing of course). For tea/water/etc, things without...bits? Pulp? It seems to work well! A little bit of that "hmm there's a small crack in my straw" feeling but not unmanageable or frustrating in that you're getting more air than liquid. I haven't yet tried these on stuff like OJ or smoothies, but for basic hydration, they do pretty well! They seem to do alright in hot drinks too.

These are silicon, so not any help for folks allergic I'm afraid, but I was hoping this could maybe be a fit for someone who wants to go reusable but fears the straw won't be clean enough! If you hate getting posts like these & I somehow missed it, my bad & feel free to delete! But if this could help someone out I'd love it if you shared w/ your followers.

------------

Thank you for the product rec, hopefully, those might be useful to some people. The price is nice too, considering I've seen straws just like this retailing at $20+

It is worth noting that the silicone used in these types of straws is not immune to biofilm build-up over time as the silicone starts to degrade, so it might not be suitable for those with severely decreased immune systems. (Plus dexterity issues. Holding them open to scrub can sometimes be tricky!)

I really wish I could get silicone straws to work for me because I feel like my immune system is in a better place to deal with any potential risks (it certainly wasn't this time two years ago). But for some reason, I still choke while using them. I think they're just too soft/require me to do something different that my jaw/tongue muscles can't handle. Very frustrating, but it is what it is, I'm afraid.

As per usual, this post is not an invitation for people to "solve" my need to use flexible plastic straws to drink fluids without aspirating. Nor is it an invitation to debate the validity of needing plastic straws to accommodate disabilities.

If you're curious about this subject and would like to know more, I'm going to ask that you watch this video from @jessicaoutofthecloset which explains it really well.

Thank you in advance, and please know if you try to start a debate with me over this, I will block you. Both because I don't want to debate my right to live as a disabled person vs your eco-activism, but also to keep you from getting annihilated in the comments.

The disabled community is very tired of the straw debate. The only reason I am posting this is because it was sent in good faith, informative about the product itself, and might help someone looking for alternatives :)

[mihrunnisasultans]

Becoming Elizabeth, Abuse TW + some remarks on historical discourse

I did liveblog The Spanish Princess here last year, but tbh this year have less of energy for longer posts and most of TSP liveblogging was mockery anyway because it was hard to take Fr*ost’s work seriously.

Here we do might finally have a serious discussion.

And at the same time, I personally do not feel that much strength to do commentary each week.

I put some loose thoughts on twitter here - . And I will reserve final judgment until the end of how it all plays out the whole and to what it leads to.

/Bear in mind I haven’t seen ep 3 yet and simply decided to post it before I do to get certain things off my chest/

Definitely love Mary so far and how there is focus paid to her feelings on the religious issue as well, and that not only Protestants had to face intolerance and persecution. 

What worries me is some claims that due to Elizabeth sleeping with Se*ymour, “she’s disrespected and shown in bad light” and “romanticizing this as consensual relationship because still a child ‘agreed’ to sleep with an older predator”. Uhm?

Listen, I get people might not approve of things going this faar on show because I am myself not a fan of this and I do think the writer does like the “gritty and dark” tone too much at times, but no way the relationship is presented as romantic or consensual, as the screenwriter even made clear in behind the scenes commentary.

It’s not consensual, either. S*eymour’s manipulations are so odious he does try to give it an impression of being consensual, hence his repeated questions to her whether she wants it. He knows what he is doing and that “consent” is included there for purpose. Because yes predators might say that their underage victims “consented”. Even the victim might believe so because of such manipulations and feel ashamed. None of this changes the situation and erases the abuse. Him wanting to ensure “she wants it” only further highlights how disgustingly manipulative he is and how well he thinks on his “plans”. /Oh wait I also read now that the author confirmed on twitter the “consent gate” was SPECIFICALLY included to show the abuse… I mean it was obvious anyway to anyone watching in a not taking-stuff-at-face value way/

And making a teenage girl yield to her manipulator is not disrespecting her or painting her in a bad light, either. You can disapprove of the writing choice in other terms and all, but again painting the image a woman is not a victim if she is “perfect” and immune to manipulations and never giving in to them.. Is wrong. And it’s not healthy to portray situations like this only in that manner - that of course the only option is seeing her stop herself before it’s too late because she’s Elizabeth, THAT strong queen, how could she fall into predator’s trap?

/And same with jumping to conclusions with Katherine Parr, only because she is shown to be more pragmatic and ambitious than usual and not purely the “bookish momma” people are used to, so for some people she is immediately “villified”.. only because she is not as saintly as in some other depictions. Again you can disagree with the depiction, but such extremes do not do these women service either./

Yielding there does not make Elizabeth less of a victim and Se*ymour less of a predator. And it does not make their relationship “romance”.

People who are criticizing the show  because “it romanticizes the relationship by making her sleep with him consensually”... ok, you are using big words here, but think of the implications of what you are saying again.

Same with people again going how it’s “romanticizing” because Se*ymour is played by a handsome, charming actor. So all abusers are ugly and creepy? /And anyway that fangirl of his running his fansite hating this portrayal just shows me it is right lmao./

People with such criticism would want to the shows to always portray grooming and abuse in one stock way for it to be acceptable - he’s ugly and basically with neon sign saying “I’m the abuser” and she obviously does not fall for his bullshit at all, instead makes all the smart decisions, even if she’s a lonely, traumatised kid who lost both of her parents living in very hostile environment, who unfortunately finds herself in situation that the only person who makes her smile around is the one using her most.

Same with people still not getting unreliable POVs either - and the show so far goes from such vulnerable, confused teenager’s POV and hence the claustrophobic mood of the whole show.

And TBF that brings me again to what I hate in general in fandom discourse regarding historical shows - people believe all their historical faves always behave in a rational manner.. Or how they would behave. Or rather SHOULD behave. And cannot envision those people were flesh and blood humans who had their own weakness and even uncharacteristic behaviours caused by random impulses or sudden emotion. And yes not everything made into history books.

My pet peeve is people screaming “historical inaccuracy” at every turn without realising something like “real history” does not exist. Of course there is undeniable dry facts that we know happened (who became king and in what year etc.),  but a lot of discourse is based on what we have evidence for and what against and even that is always interpretative in the end. I hate the “it didn’t happen!” approach, I always say “we have no evidence for” is a much better standpoint to discuss.  And historical TV shows often must fill blanks on stuff that is usually not part of “chronicle like reporting” and delving into the personal and behind the scenes, sooo yes all this screaming “not historical” to get you cookie points and to try to simply put stuff that way instead of simply stating “I do not like this personally” IS annoying (and with Tudors here at least we do have some decent amount of sources, including first-hand ones, but e.g, with Ottoman history on ladies from closed harems the issue gets 10x more annoying)..It’s the same as claiming “bad writing” at every turn, when what bothers you is in fact it did not go the way you wanted / complied with your vision.

And to Anya Reiss’ huge credit, she did mention the issue on her twitter, that “how history went” is  often how we THINK it goes, only one interpretation of many.

You can disapprove of something personally and be honest with it instead of trying to make it some bigger issue thing. 

It went much longer than I intended, but yes it’s always the same issues that pop up and they annoy me, so let’s just have it dealt with I guess. It’s not even in favour of show because I am so far neutral on it, but I already saw elements of discourse that tire the fuck out of me. Like we cannot truly have interesting, complex discussions if people halt them by claiming “romanticizing” just because it does not portray the grooming as they *think* it should in some stock simplified way or it’s “historically inaccurate” often based on simply the interpretation of evidence or lack thereof they themselves choose to believe in.