#yes even you salted licorice!

[dedalvs]

Salt! Gift of the gods! Pure as silver, it puts the fine in finance! The Valyrian word for "salt" is lopon, but it's likely to show up as lopor, in the collective. Enjoy this gift of salt! Let us take some time today to celebrate salt and all it has done for our dried meats and caramels!

[sarnai4]

(Because of you, @mer-acle 😁)

Ice cream for Mount Olympus.

Athena is a classy lady. She gets pistachio other nuts like white chocolate macadamia (Thanks @dantsem!), and olive oil because we know that's her tree. She knows how to get the perfect number of scoops to be perfectly satisfied.

Ares is a frozen yogurt immortal because he wants to go against what the others are doing. He refuses to join in. He'll try every flavor and load it with toppings, challenging Athena to see who can pile on more things until someone has a topping spill out.

Artemis wants the flavors that show her toughness. She's getting black licorice, ghost pepper, wasabi, etc. Apollo wants her to stop after the tears start, but she will power through.

Apollo is health-conscious. He's getting low-fat flavors, oatmilk or almond milk ice cream, or he's just getting Italian ice. Sorbet is also an option, but he'll argue you down about sherbet being a healthy alternative.

Hermes is ordering whatever the most uncommon flavors are. He will get garlic and Cheetos Flamin Hot (yes, these are real ice cream flavors) just to see his family cringe. He doesn't even really want them. Athena questions the logic of this.

Hephaestus likes vanilla. The others make fun of him for being boring, but he enjoys how this can be a good foundation for other desserts, sundaes, root beer floats, etc.

Dionysus is eating rum raisin, tequila, and margarita Italian ice. There was no other option. He saw booze and got heart eyes.

Aphrodite is eating chocolate and cheesecake flavors because they're rich and remind her of the richness of a passionate moment. She also likes cherry Italian ice because it makes her lips red.

Zeus is having banana cream pie, dark chocolate, and watermelon sorbet because these foods are aphrodisiacs. Even if they don't really have this effect on the brain, he's willing to try and this isn't good for anyone.

Hera eats swirls. They absolutely must be even and no other flavors can be mixed because so help her, she will see a good marriage of something even if it's only chocolate and vanilla.

Poseidon likes salted caramel. He puts extra salt on there to make him think of the ocean and adds some of those Swedish Fish on top. Zeus steals his fish most of the time.

Demeter likes black cherry, blueberry, lemon sorbet, and every other fruit flavor. She's the goddess of harvest after all. She absolutely might brag whenever she tries one that she really likes because she feels like she's a big reason for the fruits being so good.

Hades likes butter pecan and spumoni. They're relaxing but still flavorful. He can calmly enjoy a bowl of them either mixed or separate. He doesn't get involved in his brothers' ice cream battle. He just watches as Ares edges them on.

Hestia likes cake batter, birthday cake, and all the other flavors that are extremely sweet. She's the only one who can stomach things that sweet and her family thinks it's just because she's equally sweet.

[blobbycentral]

Puppets of the Gods

(Aka that one AU where the Cookies of Darkness get possessed by the beasts)

Get ready, this’ll be a long one

The AU starts with Dark Enchantress and main group of the Cookies of Darkness (Pomegranate, Poison Mushroom, Licorice, Red Velvet, and Affogato) heading to the great tree for an audience with the beasts. In this audience, the beasts demand cookie bodies like they do in game. Dark Enchantress though, instead of making new cookie bodies from scratch, offers up her subordinates as vessels and the plot begins.

(Yes that is a paper bag on his head and no I will not answer why the paper bag is grey)

SILENT SALT COOKIE

Silent Salt and Burning Spice fought over who would get the guy with the massive sword and arm. Since Burning Spice was too busy arguing with Silent Salt, they ended up getting Red Velvet instead. He’s not a terrible body to host. Strong. Nice sword. Quiet. Though he could get over the cake monster things. Silent Salt is allowed to take out whatever they want.

RED VELVET COOKIE

As a loyal member of the Cookies of Darkness, he accepted the possession, practically welcomed it. Well… he did. I mean sure Silent Salt isn’t the worse to be possessed by. He’s seen Affogato’s and Licorice’s state. It’s just… so quiet. Too quiet. He’s locked in this mind space watching Silent Salt wreck his life’s work and hurt anything that comes in their way. Maybe if Dark Enchantress knew what was going on she would help… if only he could find a way out.

BURNING SPICE COOKIE

If Silent Salt wasn’t such a big fat paper bag, Burning Spice would’ve gotten Red Velvet. But noooo he had to get the other brat with a big scythe. Licorice Cookie or whatever his name is, he’s frail, bratty and won’t shut up or stop escaping. It sucksssssssss. At least he hates Mystic Flour’s vessel as much as Burning Spice hates Mystic Flour!

LICORICE COOKIE

Alright, maybe this makes Licorice Cookie not the most loyal Cookie of Darkness but he HATES BURNING SPICE! If he had his diary (which Burning Spice looked through btw) he would be scribbling so much the paper would be soaked in pen. Everyday he and him argue and argue about what to do. It’s not Licorice’s fault that this man doesn’t know a spell book from a piece of toilet paper! Ugh… he just needs to find a way out.

MYSTIC FLOUR COOKIE

Pomegranate Cookie is loyal and quiet like a good pet. Her hair is annoying to deal with. They spent hours just trying to figure out how to take it out of those buns. Then there's her whole obsession on Dark Enchantress Cookie. Sinful and annoying. Does she not understand caring is a waste of energy? Alas

POMEGRANATE COOKIE

She knew of her master's grand plan since Dark Enchantress thought of it. She gave up herself as soon as Dark Enchantress gave out the order. She did everything Mystic Flour said just as Dark Enchantress had ordered her to do. She sat by and let Mystic Flour destroy her room, clothes, mirror— she’ll sit silently and let all happen. She can’t let her master down even if it destroys everything.

SHADOW MILK COOKIE

You know, he’d prefer Pure Vanilla. He’s more fun to toy around with! This dumb one is such a boreeee. Traumatize him once and he’s all like “I’m emo and sad and stay quiet in the mind space” it ain’t t all bad. Having a body is just soooooo much fun! He gets to play with cookies for real now! The world will remember how fun he was ;D

AFFOGATO COOKIE

When Dark Enchantress Cookie offered up the Cookies of Darkness, Affogato Cookie ran. He was barely a member anyways! He shouldn’t have to be puppeted like a worthless… well.. puppet. It doesn’t matter anymore. Shadow Milk knows everything and just how to screw with his head. He hates it. Makes him want to go back to the hell of the Dark Cacao kingdom.

ETERNAL SUGAR COOKIE

She wanted the pretty girl to be her vessel! Not some kid! Sure she was a little slow on pickings but still! They just sleep around and asks for bedtime stories and shroomies. What the actual oven is a shroomie anyways??

POISON MUSHROOM COOKIE

The pink lady is pretty. She reads them stories and snuggles them in her wings. It’d only be better if she had shroomies

And that’s all! If you have any questions feel free to ask! Thanks for reading!

[tealcaste]

i wanna ramble about licorice cookie so i decided to do it here because no one is going to stop me

(putting a read more cuz this is going to be. VERY long..)

(DISCLAIMER: I HAVENT PLAYED KINGDOM A LOT AS I PLAY OVENBREAK MORE, SO TAKE EVERYTHING I SAY WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. TY :3)

(would do ovenbreak wise but erm....... cant be asked to </3)

ANYWYAS as i said from my other account's reblog, it would be. amazing to see a licorice-focused update. YES, he HAS been included in multiple other updates, the most noticable one was the BTS collab (bro finally was significant in an update </3) but other than that, his entire existance has been pushed aside for other cookies.

now don't get me wrong, its cool to see new cookies appear in the game but.. can you... finish other pieces of lore.. please?? this doesn't only apply to licorice cookie obviously, but sinc ehtis post is only abt lico im going to use his lore as an example

..or would HAVE if he had any.

if i recall correctly, the only even "hint" of lore was him briefly talking about growing up in the Licorice Tribe in Chapter 13, claiming how it was "a shabby town to begin with", and its now in complete ruins. now i've sorta havent played the entirity of Chapter 13, but i've went through many spoilers of it and noticed that. there's nothing rlly much, except for that. (oh, i did hear he did help control the Licorice Sea, but i am not sure if that's canon or not.)

other than that, devsisters hasnt really... done anything with him? lore related?? ivve seen another post mentioning something about how he was just reduced as a comic relief and had wasted potential, which i heavily agree on.

like.. devsisters you cant just briefly mention the tribe he grew up in and never mention it again?? theres so many people who would love to know more about licorice's past, but devsisters practically ignores that just for some reason??

it really sucks as well, because if more lore about him was revealed, i feel like people would get a better understanding about his character, and not be seen as some "haha funny emo!!!!!!!!!!" (off topic but he isnt even emo HELP. he. he was confirmed goth by cookie run's official insta page but yeah) cookie that would never be taken seriously.

also, if more lore about him got revealed, i feel like it would help explain more about how he turned out the way he was..?? yes, i am aware his little story info thing DOES explain it was due to the lack of recognition, but it would be better to see. an even more in-depth explanation, as the info given about him has always been really.. breif.

the main point is, i would really love to see a licorice-focused update. a CoD update would probably be good enough if they can't be bothered, but if there WAS a CoD update, theres a very high chance of licorice being pushed aside for some.. idfk super epic or new cookies for the CoD

anwyays thank yyou for listening to my TED talk and thank you to that one licorice fanart that made me give into the urges of rambling about licorice :33333

[sysboxes]

In general, do you prefer sweet, spicy, salty, savory, plain/bland, and/or sour stuff

do the taste preferences vary by alter (if you’re a system which I think all the current mods are?) or is there some things the system generally likes?

If only most of the system likes it, why do others in sys not like it? (If comfortable sharing)

Mod Weeping ❤️- most of us prefer sweet stuff or occasionally savory stuff. We also love sour in the answer that we fucking love citrus- we will eat straight limes. And love lime and/or lemon on almost everything. We also loveee garlic. Although there are a handful of ppl who just LOVE spicy food, especially this one alter. She will eat spicy food until the body is crying but it doesn’t bother her- it usually burns the mouth of whoever is close by tho lmao. There is one alter who can’t handle citrus well tho and it makes him feel really sick for some reason?

Mod Morpho 🦋 — I have such a big sweet tooth, but I also heavily salt alllllllll my food. I don’t think the taste preferences really vary at all between us tbh.

mod wonder - oo, i think my preference is just carbohydrates in general. pasta, bread, rice. i adore salmon too. i love a lot of sweet stuff, but especially semi-sweet or dark chocolate things. sweet fruits like peaches are really fun. i can’t do spicy, partially due to allergies, and partially because i can’t handle a cheeto’s worth of spice. tastes very much do vary by alter for us, we never know what we’re gonna be in the mood for. some don’t eat meat, some prefer savory or salted or sweet, etc.

Mod luxray 🐈‍⬛️⚡️- Honestly anything that ain't plain ill eat, Being mexcian and all ya kinda half to lol, I LOVE LOVE LOOOVE dark chocolate and bitter-sweets, licorice, etc, though as a basis spicy candy will always br my favorite

Mod Bugz - My go to with the flavoring options is Spicy because any single one of those options (sweet, savory, salty, and I'd debate sour). I don't like bland food, to the point I won't eat bland things unless its a thing of being polite. Taste preferences do vary from alter to alter, and there's actually a really funny thing that happens each morning when the debate of "coffee or monster" starts bc it's a pretty even split of alters liking coffee or monster or both (and some who prefer teas, but they are usually fine with either option).

Mod Avon - SPICY!!! Love me some spicy food. I also love sour foods! Our parts do vary with what they like to eat. Also, yes, I do oversalt my food (I have POTS, the kind that is helped by salty foods, soooo).

[karinamay]

OC deepdive: Tav'ará Naldarai

Thanks for the tag @cinnamontails-ff <3

What common/uncommon fear do they have?

She's very scared to let people in, to trust them, which is just because of how she was raised. She's scared of being unimportant, of not making an impact in the world. She's also very scared of snails, but we're not going to talk about that.

Do they have any pet peeves?

When people ask you a question solely so they can talk about themselves. Also she loves physical intimacy but she hates when she can feel someone's breath in her face and she feels like she's breathing in their out-breath.

What are 3 items you can find in their bedroom?

Her bedroom is extremely tiny, basically just a mattress shoved into the attic space right under the roof. There's no shelves, or anything, but she does have fairylights, and a lot of pictures up, of her and her friends mainly (two of them are very important, one of herself, Alfira and Dammon when they graduated high school, and where Shadowheart is giving her a piggyback ride and Karlach took a picture mere seconds before Shadowheart misstepped and the two of them fell into Grey Harbour.)

What do they notice first in a person?

How they present themselves. (Their vibe if you will.) Not in an "are they attractive" way, but how they want to be perceived. Do they take care of themselves or is their appearance unimportant to them, do they like being the centre of attention or prefer being left alone.

On a scale from 1-10, how high is their pain tolerance?

Probably an 7. She absolutely hates pain, which is why I won't put it up to an 8 or a 9 even, even though she's very accustomed to dealing with pain and can technically deal with a lot. It just pisses her off too much to deal with it in a more composed manner.

Do they go into fight or flight mode when under pressure?

Fight 95% of the time. She's act first, ask questions later. There is however a 5% chance that she'll freeze, in very specific circumstances.

Do they come from a big family/are they a family person?

Tav has a pretty terrible relationship with her parents, which is fair. Jorgeon is just an absent father, and Eildys is extremely strict and holds Tav to an impossible standard, all while just not being very nice. That said, Tav does have a certain level of respect for her mother. She's not a family gal, she prefers her found family.

What animal represents them best?

My first thought it maybe a fox? I'm not sure that's just the vibe.

What is a smell they dislike?

Honeysuckle.

Have they broken any bones?

Yes, she broke her left arm once when she went on vacation to Elturel with Alfira and Dammon. No one is exactly sure what happened, but the doctor that took the x-rays at 3am was hot, though.

How would a stranger likely describe them?

"Loud" may have been a word used a lot to describe Tav, although that's gotten less bad over the past few years.

Are they a night owl, or morning bird?

She leans to being a night owl, but she also just doesn't need a lot of sleep. She likes being awake at night to see what happens in the dark, though.

What’s a flavor they hate and a flavor they love?

She kind of hates the taste of honey in any form - mead, honey cakes etc. She likes powerful flavours, salts, bitters, sours. She likes seafood, pickles, black licorice, campari, the weird kinds of gin & tonics etc.

Do they have any hobbies?

She really likes dancing when she has time to go, whether that's a class or just out at a club.

Boom, surprise birthday party! How do they react to surprise?

She would try very hard to pretend she didn't already know it was happening.

Do they like to wear jewellery?

Not particularly, she doesn't like rings or bracelets to get in the way of her movements. She used to have a lot of piercings but that was mainly to piss of Eildys and now she just has her ears pierced. She is currently wearing a tiny locket with a snowdrop on it. It's new.

Do they have neat or messy handwriting?

Messy, but definitely legible.

What are the two emotions they feel the most?

Determination and joy (shocking, but true)

Do they have a favourite fabric?

She loves knitwear, so chunky woolen sweaters, she's very partial to jeans, but not new jeans when they're still stiff, old jeans when they're soft.

What kind of accent do they have?

Tav has done her very best to take the posh out of her accent, and she's now stuck with what we'd recognise kind of as estuary english, but she does have a certain way of speaking that's still kind of melodic, due to having spent the first years of her life in Astrazalian, and solely speaking Elvish.

[mintywolf]

A Long Road Home - Page 40 Author Notes

Page 40

She culled the Karens. ;)

Also alas Imogen can’t use Mage Hand to get things off high shelves at work because some customer would complain. Probably Esther Hayes.

In Ye Olden Times when the theory of humors in disease was still prevalent (debunked with the advent of germ theory in the 1850s but the practices based on it remained in common use until the late 19th century* ) the first treatment given to a patient would be to rid them of “excess” humors by bloodletting and inducing vomiting, doubtless rendering an already miserable person even moreso. Leeches, fire cupping, or a lancet were used for the former, and mustardseed or antimonials (made with the toxic metal antimony :[ ) were used for the latter. Mustardseed was also used to make poultices for sore throats and respiratory ailments. Licorice was used for sore throats and itchy skin. Baths from epsom salts or oatmeal were (and are) used to relieve the itchiness from rash-causing diseases like the one the town is currently experiencing.** Quinine was actually mostly used for malaria so one person is confused about what’s going around. Belladonna (aka deadly nightshade), although toxic, actually had some effectiveness as a preventative for scarlet fever if taken early after exposure. And laudanum, as I have mentioned before, was used for everything. So there’s some context for all the assorted shopping lists bombarding Imogen over the first three panels.

(* which I mention because Exandria’s technological level as of C3 seems to be early Industrial Era, although my Gelvaan aesthetic also has some 1880s and 1930s elements. And magical healing seems to be reserved for the privileged, given the high cost of healing potions, how many strings the relatively-anonymous Bells Hells had to pull to get help for Laudna, and the number of people who seem genuinely surprised when FCG offers them healing out of kindness. Most people probably rely on home remedies.)

** which hasn’t been made obvious yet but it will on the next page. You can see some suggestion of the eponymous scarlet on Imogen’s neck in the bottom left panel though.

So a long time and several fandoms ago a friend used to give me a hard time about my over-reliance on melodramatic Victorian novel disease as a plot device (specifically, targeting the heroine — or her best beloved — with it) so I imposed a rule on myself that I could only deploy it once per fandom (with the assumption that I’d have a different audience every time) and it had to drive the story forward. And friends, the time has come.

But I mean, come on. I couldn’t hang that gun on the wall and not have it go off and hit one of them.

This fandom’s enthusiasm for sickfics and whump in general has relaxed my stance a bit though. Before coming here I didn’t realize it was an entire genre and moreover, one that seems to target Imogen almost exclusively. If I had I might have leaned towards the alternative I also considered where Imogen tries futilely to convince an angry mob that obviously Laudna didn’t curse the town with a plague if she has it too. But then they’d be on the run before she had a chance to recover (you know, like after she got resurrected no I’m not still salty about it*** ) which isn’t a very satisfying chapter end. But fear not, this is all reciprocated in a later chapter.

A common thread I’ve noticed in sick Imogen fics though is that Laudna always seems to be much more calm and reassuring about it than she should be, haha. Imogen is the only thing in the world she genuinely cares about and she’s already half convinced that she’s always just a few missteps away from losing her forever. She’d be panicking.

(*** this is a lie. Also you know what else I’m still mad about? That she didn’t get that lil gryphon toy!! She clearly wanted it, she went in looking for a toy because she was feeling vulnerable and childlike and wanted the comfort of something simple intended to make a child happy. (Which is even more clear now since she was in the same regressive emotional state then as she has been recently after Ashton ate the lava shard, which she coped with by making another doll.) Fearne bought it and totally forgot about it. :( We could have had another meat-named doll character this entire time!!!

[str1v1ng4z3r0]

Tw: b/p rant

B1nged so bad today I hate myself and this stupid brain of mine 😭😭😭 I finally had a day where my bf had an evening shift and I had nothing to stop me from a whole day of f4sting. And then I got to work and someone had put out a ginormous bowl of candy… and Fridays at primary schools… well let me just say it sometimes feels as if I’m a veterinarian at a zoo where the animals have gotten some sort of crazy virus. And after my first class it was like my brain checked out when I sat down in the staff room and suddenly was stuffing my face in that bowl of hell. After that I felt like a total loser and that all day was ruined and all of that…

Also, due to the situation with my coworker yesterday I got no lesson planning done yesterday as I had planned for, so I had to work over today to plan next week. What does this stupid girl decide to do? Eat like 6(??!!) crisp bread with BUTTER!!!

And apparently that wasn’t enough, she also stopped to get a salad for dinner (no the point of this day was not having to eat any meal at all you stupid ašš)… but yeah no apparently I couldn’t even do that right. Not only did I buy the salad (which might had been at least a little bit okay) but I also got a whole box of raspberries (which is absolutely low c4l and better than most stuff on a low c4l day but as I said before - this was supposed to be a f4sting day which means everything over 5 c4ls is forbidden in my book), and also I was craving salty black licorice and it was a hot day so I wanted ice cream, I looked for a low c4l licorice ice cream but they were all high c4l so I decided to go with a low c4l mango passion. Oh yeah I now remember, I had also already picked up some lentil cakes (like rice cakes but lentil version) to ease my salt craving so I really didn’t even need anything more with salt??? When I finally got to the register they had licorice pastilles right in front of me and I just see my hand reaching for it and putting it on the line. I finished all of these except for the lentil cake where I had like 4(?)

Wait wait wait… it doesn’t end here. I then get home to see I have a lot of cans to recycle and in Sweden you get 1SEK store value card for each can. And since I was on such a loser-roll I was almost obligated to go recycle and get something from the store. Wow when I write it down I actually get nauseated. But yes, this happened and no I didn’t buy just one thing. I got chips AND a chocolate bar AND sweet&salty nuts. I only had like a handful of chips and then threw it away.

So yeah this day was a disaster. I’m now on a long walk and know that I’m in no way going to be able to undo any of this bullshit or even get close to my regular net limit. About half an hour ago I had to stop in the bushes behind a playground and p*rge because I felt like my whole body was about to burst. It was awful and I felt so dirty doing it next to a place where children go to play… thank god it was in the evening so no kids were outside to play. Also I haven’t p*rged on purpose in such a long time and it brought back bad memories from 10ish years ago. Also… when you don’t to it on a regular basis you’re not prepared for it so all I had was 2 Kleenex, half a bottle of water and thankfully some gum. But I seriously had to blow my nose in pads in the end because the Kleenex weren’t enough.

I wish today didn’t exist. I’m such a failure 😭🤯

[cookie-run-kingdom-story]

The Kingdom’s Best Cake Shop!

Never a Dull Moment!

Magical Emergency Handling: The case is officially closed! Almond Cookie: Good work, everyone. I know it’s time to go home, but please… Magical Emergency Handling: Yes, yes, we know. It may be the holidays, but crime doesn’t take holidays. Right? Magical Emergency Handling: Don’t worry about it. I’ll be right back if we get a call! Almond Cookie: Ha ha, I’m grateful to have such a dedicated team. Almond Cookie’s Pager: *beep beep* Magical Emergency Handling: Oh, me and my big mouth! I should keep a sack of salt around… Almond Cookie: No, no, this is… Friendly Text: “Have you heard that the most BRILLIANT wizards in the history of Parfaedia are having the SWEETEST party ever?! You better hurry before the cake is all gone!” Almond Cookie: …A personal call. Almond Cookie: I’ll be off then. Have a good night, folks.

Cream Puff Cookie: Oh, Detective Almond Cookie! Over here! Latte Cookie: Perfect timing! TA-DA! What do you think of this masterpiece?! Almond Cookie: …It’s a cake? Cream Puff Cookie: It’s not just any ordinary cake though! It’s a custom-made cake by the Sugar Gnome Cake Shop! I can’t wait to try it…! Latte Cookie: Do you have any idea how much trouble we went through to get this cake? You know, for a detective, you sure can be clueless sometimes! Almond Cookie: …Please understand that this time of the year can get pretty… hectic. My apologies. Latte Cookie: You’re welcome! It always makes me proud when a student of mine learns something… Ha ha! Almond Cookie: …??? Are you calling me a student- Latte Cookie: Ha ha! Let’s go inside, shall we? Cream Puff Cookie did such an amazing job preparing the place for the part! Prepare to be wowed! Cream Puff Cookie: Eh he he… It wasn’t all me… I couldn’t have done it without the kind professor! Almond Cookie: You organized all of this by yourselves? Cream Puff Cookie: Yep, we decorated with ribbons, cooked a bunch of yummy dishes, and even cast spells so the dishes won’t grow cold! Cream Puff Cookie: I made cute cream puppy decorations and lit candles to make it extra pretty… OH! Latte Cookie: Yes, candles feel much more festive than magical lights… OH!? Almond Cookie: W-what’s the matter with you two?!

Latte Cookie: We forgot to turn off the candles before picking up the cake…! Almond Cookie: WHAT?! And you call yourself a responsible adult?! Cream Puff Cookie: W-what do we do, professor? Latte Cookie: We run! Now! Almond Cookie! Start running! Almond Cookie: Wizards…! It’s like you’re TRYING to create accidents…! Almond Cookie: You call that running?! Where’s the party?! Run faster!

Bound by Cake

Cake Monsters: Huff huff… huff… Red Velvet Cookie: Good work, desserts. You are now officially soldiers of the Cake legion. Cake Monsters: RUFF! Red Velvet Cookie: It is I who command the battlefield. You lot have nothing to worry about. I’m responsible for everything… Poison Mushroom Cookie: Red Velvet Coooookie! Red Velvet Cookie: Poison Mushroom Cookie? Odd to see you here.

Pomegranate Cookie: Poison Mushroom Cookie is here because they followed me. Greetings, Red Velvet Cookie. Pomegranate Cookie: It’s not long until our master’s grand plans finally come to fruition. Truly, a crucial moment for us all… Pomegranate Cookie: And as expected, thankfully, I see that you’re working hard as always. Pomegranate Cookie: Unlike some foolish Cookie who decided to get in line for some cake in such crucial times. Licorice Cookie: I-I was spying on the cake shop! Gathering information! Pomegranate Cookie: Getting in line several times wearing EXACTLY the same disguise can hardly be called… “spying”. Pomegranate Cookie: Admit it! You just wanted to eat cake! The entire Tower of Sweet Chaos is at your disposal, but no! You HAD to get THAT cake! Red Velvet Cookie: I know it was probably just a spur of the moment but these are not for sale or eating.

Licorice Cookie: The disguise was because I need more than one cake! Bat-Cat and Schwarzwälder wanted some too… Pomegranate Cookie: If you could put half the effort you aim towards those fools into the master’s grand plans…! Red Velvet Cookie: You two, take it outside. Licorice Cookie: What are you saying?! I give 100% and more to Dark Enchantress Cookie! Red Velvet Cookie: It’s like talking to a wall… Poison Mushroom Cookie: Lookie lookie, Red Velvet Cookie! Red Velvet Cookie: It’s a cake. Do you want me to cut you a piece? Poison Mushroom Cookie: Make me a friend, please! Red Velvet Cookie: A friend? Ah. You mean a Cake Hound. I’m afraid I can’t do that. Only cakes born in this very oven here and my sword can… Poison Mushroom Cookie: No… friends…? But I have lots… of shroomies… Red Velvet Cookie: …You know Cookies that will have that cake with you though. Poison Mushroom Cookie: With… me…? Red Velvet Cookie: Yes. You have me, and those two squabbling over there as well.

Red Velvet Cookie: Here, I cut it up evenly. Go get them. Poison Mushroom Cookie: But Pomegranate Cookie… angry… I’m scared…! Red Velvet Cookie: She won’t listen to me but she will listen to you. Go…! Poison Mushroom Cookie: Hmm… Licorice Cookie: …But I-I’m good at my job, you know! Pomegranate Cookie: That’s what YOU think! Poison Mushroom Cookie: …Pomegranate Cookie, Licorice Cookie! Pomegranate Cookie: …! Licorice Cookie: …Yes, quite right! Poison Mushroom Cookie: Let’s go have cake…! Red Velvet Cookie has cut it for us! Pomegranate Cookie: Sigh… Yes. It seems that I have gotten myself overworked over something so trivial. Licorice Cookie: A-Ahem! Took the words right out of my mouth! You should thank Poison Mushroom Cookie for stopping me! Red Velvet Cookie: Ah, you’re all here. Here’s your piece. If you don’t take it, these Cake Hounds are more than happy to take it off your hands. Licorice Cookie: Huh?! Wait… WAIT! That’s MY cake! I didn’t bring it all the way here to share with you! UGH… Poison Mushroom Cookie: He he he… So lively… Poison Mushroom Cookie: So warm, my spores… Huuh…? You think so too? He he…

Super Cake Mayhem

Twizzly Gummy Cookie: Hey! Where is everyone?

Twizzly Gummy Cookie: Zap it up and come out right now! I brought cake! Wild Strawberry Cookie: Cake? Toothpaste Cookie: I knew you were up to something when you disappeared just back then… Did you steal it from the store? Twizzly Gummy Cookie: No, I bought it! Now be grateful and let’s EAT! Wild Strawberry Cookie: …You didn’t have to steal it? Twizzly Gummy Cookie: Ha ha ha… In this dimension, everyone can have as much cake as they want. I’m not gonna miss out on having cake! Toothpaste Cookie: Pfft, so you actually stood in line, ordered this gigantic cake, and PAID for it? Is that what you’re saying? Toothpaste Cookie: Who would’ve thought that you’re the galaxy’s greatest criminal who even escaped the Time Balance Department?

Toothpaste Cookie: Pfft… I can’t stop laughing! HA HA! You’re gonna make me cry! HA HA HA! Twizzly Gummy Cookie: Why you… I could’ve just had this all by myself but I brought it to share it with you guys…! *smack* Twizzly Gummy Cookie: One more laugh and I’ll stuff your mouth with this cake! Got it?! Toothpaste Cookie: Gah, what are you, five?! Throwing cake is not cool! I’ve spent hours on getting my hair ready and now it’s covered in cake! Wild Strawberry Cookie: Ew… You’re a mess. Don’t come near me. Toothpaste Cookie: …You know that only makes me wanna come close, right? Wild Strawberry Cookie: No… Stay back! ARGH! You got cake all over me as well! UGHHHH… That’s it, I’m gonna cover you in cake!

Croissant Cookie: Freeze! I’m from the TBD! You little rascals, stop right there- *SMACK* Wild Strawberry Cookie: Wait, what?! You got in my way! I was aiming for him! Croissant Cookie: Wah, what’s this? Cake…? I can’t see…! Toothpaste Cookie: Ha ha ha! Saved by the cake! Looks like TBD can be helpful after all! Twizzly Gummy Cookie: Tsk, how did they find us so soon?! Everyone, run for it! Croissant Cookie: No! Patooey! Halt! Haaaaaaalt!

Sweet Treats in the Forest

Pinecone Cookie: Ta-da! Look at this! Thick Oak Tree: *Creak…?* Pinecone Cookie: Nope! Wrong! This here, is called… Pinecone Cookie: A holiday cake! Apparently it’s super popular in the Cookie kingdom! Pinecone Cookie: It’s round and thick! Just like that trunk of yours! Long Elm Tree: *Whisssss* Pinecone Cookie: Huh…? Trees don’t eat this? Well, yeah, I know! Pinecone Cookie: But everyone was getting one… to share it with their friends… Dry Birch Tree: *Tick tick tick…* Pinecone Cookie: No, it’s fine! I’ll have it by myself… Small Animal Sounds: *chirp chirp* *purrrrr!* Pinecone Cookie: Uh… Who goes there?!

Fig Cookie: ‘Ello! Didja hear ma jelly horns as well? Pinecone Cookie: Jelly horns? I’m Pinecone Cookie, the keeper of this forest! Fig Cookie: I see! M’name is Fig Cookie. Fig Cookie: What a nice for’st you ‘ave here! This for’st is lucky to ‘ave such a mighty for’st keeper! Pinecone Cookie: Er… yeah! He he… Fig Cookie: Actually, I brought some cake to share it with ma animal friends and fellow young Cookies! Wouldja like to join us? Pinecone Cookie: Oh! Cake? I have cake too! Pinecone Cookie: I… can’t share it with my tree friends… Fig Cookie: Pafect! I was word’d it might not be enough! Fig Cookie: I’m so glad to have metcha, for’st keeper! Pinecone Cookie: R-really?! Fig Cookie: Yes, ‘f course! And I think the trees will be ‘appy to ‘ave us enjoy the cake nea’ them! Thick Oak Tree: *rustle rustle* Pinecone Cookie: Fig Cookie is right…? Pinecone Cookie: Alright! Oh, we can explain to the trees what it tastes like after having a bite! Fig Cookie: That’s a great oidea!

Holidays on the Waves

Republic Sailor Cookie 2: Heigh-ho, heigh-ho! We are the Cookies of the sea, living on the ship and that’s where we’ll be! Throw away your worries about getting soggy! Heave! Ho! Salty Shark Crew: Heave! Ho! Candy Diver Cookie: ⭗,⭗◯~! Republic Sailor Cookie 1: You lot! Stop loitering around! Do your jobs! Republic Sailor Cookie 2: Didn’t we already finish checking the merchant ships before the year-end events? We’re doing our job! Look at us! Being on guard! Republic Sailor Cookie 2: And look at our captain! He’s buying us cake because it’s the holiday! Seriously, we don’t deserve you! Republic Sailor Cookie 1: Pfft! Says the one that’s been nagging the captain ever since you saw the first snowflake! Republic Sailor Cookie 1: You dropped down the deck and started yelling how you’ll become soggy if we don’t get you some cake! Republic Sailor Cookie 2: But this fella says there’s nothing quite like it! If a Cookie says that it’s THAT good, you gotta try it!

Candy Diver Cookie: ⬛⬛⬛~! ⬜⬜⬜~! ★፠☆★!! Republic Sailor Cookie 2: And the captain is… Huh? Wait. We have a guest! Oyster Cookie: Such a merry bunch of sailors! I take it that your captain is currently occupied? Slow Salty Shark Sailor: The captain? Yes, he’s out to get us cake- Republic Sailor Cookie 2: Don’t go blabbering on about! Republic Sailor Cookie 1: The captain is busy, as always. But I’m sure the venerable elder knows that already. How can I help you today? Do you have an appointment with the captain? Oyster Cookie: Oh, naturally we’re closer than that, don’t you think? I just wanted to stop by and see a friendly face! Republic Sailor Cookie 1: R-right… of course… Republic Sailor Cookie 2: Err… Don’t do anything funny, okay> Republic Sailor Cookie 1: Ugh, you just had to get that cake, didn’t ya! Captain Caviar Cookie: What’s going on? Didn’t I tell you lot to keep watch? Republic Sailor Cookie 1 & 2: Captain! Captain Caviar Cookie: Ah. And who’s this? What brings you to the Salty Shark? Oyster Cookie: There are conversations that suit the walls of exuberant mansions and decorated halls, and there are conversations to be held over the rocking waters.

Oyster Cookie: The invitation to the year-end ball. You’ve received one, yes? Captain Caviar Cookie: Oh, that one. The one with the fancy envelope and one single sentence? Republic Sailor Cookie 1: Err… are we allowed to listen to this…? Captain Caviar Cookie: If it’s important, let’s head to my quarters. But first… Captain Caviar Cookie: You don’t mind me sharing this cake with my crew, do you? If you want a piece, feel free to sit anywhere on the deck. Republic Sailor Cookie 1: On the deck?! But she’s from House Oyster! Oyster Cookie: How kind of you to think so highly of me! Oyster Cookie: Oh, I recognize that box. It must be from the Sugar Gnomes’ Cake shop, yes? The wonderful helpers who build magnificent buildings? Republic Sailor Cookie 2: Oh? She’s sitting down! Oyster Cookie: I was wondering if it was worth getting in line… What a perfect opportunity. Since you offered, I’d love to have one. Thank you very much. Captain Caviar Cookie: Ha! Thought so. My crew comes first, so don’t think of having seconds!

Captain Caviar Cookie: You all heard that, right? Who wants cake? It’s now or never! Salty Shark Crew: Aye, aye!

Jolly Baking Livestream~☆

Parfait Cookie: Hello, hello! Thank you for coming to Parfait Cookie’s stream! Parfait Cookie: Ooh, I think I see some new names! Hi, y’all! And I also see familiar ones! WELCOME! EyesONParfait: (Parfait Cookie, we missed you!) Par_fait_Paru: (I’ve been waiting since this morning! SO EXCITED!) Parfait Cookie: Thanks, everyone! I missed you all as well! ColorfulLove: (Parfait Cookie! I hope you have a nice holiday!) Parfait Cookie: Aw, thank you! As a matter of fact, I thought I’d have something special today! To celebrate the holidays! He he… Parfait Cookie: It’s… a Holiday Cake Cooking special! Parfait Cookie: It’s my gift to you all for showing me so much love this year! Let’s all sing our favorite songs after this, yeah?! Paruparufait: (Ooh, a cooking special! Is Parfait Cookie good at baking as well? SHE’S EVERYTHING!!!) Parfait Cookie: Err, you see, it’s actually my first time baking a cake… Parfait Cookie: So I decided to invite some guests over who can help! Please give them a round of applause!

Cherry Blossom Cookie: Hi, Parfait Cookie! Thanks for inviting us! Cherry Cookie: He he, SO EXCITED! Cake bombs, here I come! EyesONParfait: (Special guests?! WHAT?! I wanna be there!) PreciousParfait: (Wait, isn’t that the Cookie behind the fireworks from that last time?) Parfait Cookie: With the help of Cherry Cookie and Cherry Blossom Cookie, I’m gonna bake a pretty and yummy cake! Parfait Cookie: Now, let me introduce the ingredients first… Parfait Cookie: Huh? Cherry Blossom Cookie, Cherry Cookie, what’s that you have? Cherry Cookie: Cake! Doesn’t it smell nice? I thought this would be perfect for our holiday picnic! Cherry Cookie: And this here is a cake too! That MAY have a bomb inside! He he, you won’t know until you try it! Parfait Cookie: But… I planned to… bake a cake today… Cherry Cookie: I know, I know, we brought one just in case! You know, in case it blows up! Parfait Cookie: B-blows… up? Cherry Blossom Cookie: Well, Cherry Cookie is here, so you never know! Cherry Cookie: Boom! BAM! But you gotta have cherry bombs on a cake! ParfaitisLIFE: (Is Cherry Cookie’s cake safe…?)

Cherry Cookie: What? But it’s an explosion of flavors! LITERALLY! HA HA! Parfait Cookie: Ha ha ha… Cherry Cookie, you’re so funny! No worries, the cake isn’t gonna explode… Right…? Parfait Cookie: Er, but I’m kinda glad Cherry Blossom Cookie has a back up cake prepared! Parfait Cookie: Then shall we start baking?! Parfait Cookie: Here goes nothing…! Thank you for always being with me! Paru-paru-PARFAIT!☆

Tropical Soda Holidays

Mango Cookie: Welcome to the Tropical Soda Island Tour where the juiciest fruits are here for you all year round! Mango Cookie: Isn’t the sun so bright and warm? I heard that it’s snowing in other kingdoms right now! Sorbet Shark Cookie: OooO? OooOoOO… Mango Cookie: You’ve never seen snow? Neither have I! It’s warm all year round in the Tropical Soda Islands! Mango Cookie: And because the climate is so different, our holidays are also different from other kingdoms. Mango Cookie: Which is why today’s tour will feature the holiday feast of the Tropical Soda Islands where every bite is full of bright delight! Mango Cookie: Let’s start it off with a fresh berry salad served in a watermelon bowl! Handmade from the Watermelon Village! Mango Cookie: Because the Soda Islands are just so hot all the time, we gotta cool it off with refreshing treats! Tourist Cookies: Oh wow, this is really freezing! That sure was refreshing!

Sorbet Shark Cookie: OoOoO! Mango Cookie: Ha ha, isn’t it nice? It definitely helps with the heat! Mango Cookie: And here’s the main dish: Tropical Seafood Platter! Get ‘em fresh, straight from the sea! Tourist Cookies: Hmm, this shrimp is hard to handle! Sorbet Shark Cookie: Oo, ooOooOo… Tourist Cookies: Huh? You want… the shrimp? Sorbet Shark Cookie: ooO! OooO! Tourist Cookies: Oh! Thank you for taking care of that! Mango Cookie: Oh, are you familiar with seafood? You’re so skilled at peeling peach shrimp! Mango Cookie: Wait, actually, why don’t you try our cold cuts as well? They’re made from smoked Jelly Beans! Mango Cookie: And add a glass of pineapple juice, and voila! Your belly is full of sweet delight! Sorbet Shark Cookie: Oooo~OoOooo~ Tourist Cookies: Oh, how sweet and delicious! Mango Cookie: What do you think? Holidays in the Tropical Soda Island* are pretty cool, right? Mango Cookie: Oh! How could I forget. I heard you eat cake for the holidays in the Cookie Kingdom. Mango Cookie: The Tropical Soda Islands also celebrate the holidays by having cake as dessert! Mango Cookie: Which is why I’ve brought… a Tropical Soda Islands-themed holiday cake! Sorbet Shark Cookie: oooO! O! OooOOOoO~ Mango Cookie: Wait, what? Oh! Did you bring a tropical holiday cake as well? Sorbet Shark Cookie: OoooO~OoooOooOO! Mango Cookie: Did you bring it so that we can all share it together? Sorbet Shark Cookie: OOOoO! Mango Cookie: You must be familiar with the Tropical Soda Islands! Thank you so much! Everyone, let’s all have cake! Tourist Cookies: Wow, that looks amazing! Thanks so much! Sorbet Shark Cookie: OooOoOOoO~

Cake! Cake! Cake!

Strawberry Cookie: Oh…? Hello, Carrot Cookie…! Carrot Cookie: Oh, it’s Strawberry Cookie! Are you going to GingerBrave’s holiday party later as well? Strawberry Cookie: Yup…! I even bought cake for everyone. Carrot Cookie: Oh?! You too? I bought cake as well! Carrot Cookie: I bought a big one so that we can share it with everyone! It’s even bigger than my giant crops! Whaddya think? Strawberry Cookie: Wow, it really is big…! Strawberry Cookie: Next to Carrot Cookie’s cake, the cake I brought looks so small…

Carrot Cookie: Oh, pfft. Okay, that’s not true! And besides, that doesn’t matter! Pancake Cookie: Whatcha doing here? I wanna play together too! Strawberry Cookie: Pancake Cookie! I met Carrot Cookie on my way from the cake shop… Pancake Cookie: Ooh, you got cake? I got cake too! Just got it right now! Eh he he! Strawberry Cookie: Pancake Cookie got cake too…?

Pancake Cookie: Yep! It’s a cute cake just like me! Do you like it?! Muscle Cookie: Look at my cake! Carrot Cookie: Muscle Cookie… brought… something sweet?! I thought you were avoiding sugar? Muscle Cookie: Not for me! It’s for the other Cookies!

Muscle Cookie: It’s custom-made! It’s big and heavy so that I can work out even on the way here! Strawberry Cookie: Everyone brought a cool cake… My cake… is kinda… small… Herb Cookie: Hello, everyone! Oh wow, you’ve all brought such wonderful cakes! Carrot Cookie: Herb Cookie! Did you get a cake for GingerBrave’s party as well? Pancake Cookie: Show us! Show us! Herb Cookie: I sure did! Take a look at this! Carrot Cookie: Hmm...? Muscle Cookie: It’s small! Pancake Cookie: It’s so cute!

Herb Cookie: Don’t you think it looks like a little baby sprout? Strawberry Cookie: Yes, it’s small but so cute! Herb Cookie: And Strawberry Cookie, your Cake is so pretty! I’m sure everyone is gonna love it! Strawberry Cookie: Oh… You really think so? Herb Cookie: Of course! Everyone is gonna be super happy! Carrot Cookie: I told ya! Strawberry Cookie, you picked it out for your friends! Strawberry Cookie: That’s right…! I hope everyone will like it! Pancake Cookie: Let’s go and eat it! Hurry! hurry!* HURRY!

*actual text

Muscle Cookie: Hmm, I think I can squeeze in 5 pus-up* sets and 10 squat sets! Maybe I’ll eat a Topping or two…

*actual text

Strawberry Cookie: Thanks everyone…! Strawberry Cookie: I want to help out preparing for the party, so I’m gonna start heading right now…! See you all later! Herb Cookie: See you at the party, Strawberry Cookie!

[pudding-parade]

get to know me - useless info edition

I was tagged by @echoweaver (so blame her), so here we go:

What do you have under your bed? Big, flat Rubbermaid storage containers. We use them to store out-of-season clothing and computer parts and Christmas wrapping paper and all sorts of things. That way, the stuff is out of the way but still easily accessible when we need it.

Also, dust bunnies.

Favorite candy? SALMIAKKI!!!! (You Finns will understand. LOL ) I'm actually not a huge fan of sweet, so the tangy saltiness of salmiakki appeals to me, even though I'm not all that big on black licorice. The combination of the licorice with the ammonia salt, though, really works for me. A few Finns recommended that I try it when I went on a Nordic cruise with a stop in Helsinki a few years back, so I did and fell and love, and now I order a supply online a couple times a year, since I've never found it for sale in a store here in the US.

Alternatively, I like York Peppermint Patties. Or, if I have a cough, root beer barrel hard candies to suck on.

Describe your favorite shirt: One just like this one, which my daughter bought me for my birthday a few years back because she knows me too well:

I love wearing it when in the redder/more conspiracy-theory-prone areas of my state. (Remember: My Congressional representative is…Lauren Boebert. My county didn't vote for her since we're one of the bluest counties in the country, but we are unfortunately surrounded by deep-red counties with larger populations, and Boebert is a good representation of those people. It's encouraging that she only barely held on to her seat, at least. *sigh* )

The last thing you drew/doodled was: Because my drawing talent is nil, I only ever doodle music. As in, I draw a staff and then doodle notes on it, often but not always with faces in the note heads. The funny thing is that sometimes the doodles become actual compositions. Are you completely sober rn? Right now? Yes. However, I also have some cannabis brownies in the oven right now, so no promises for later. What's the one thing that annoys you more than anything? Willful ignorance. Being ignorant in general is entirely forgivable, as we are all ignorant of many things. However, when a person refuses to learn because they know that the facts will conflict with what they want to believe, then I will have a problem with them. (See t-shirt above. :) ) Have you ever gotten your tongue stuck to a cold pole during winter? Nope! Though I could give you a long list of much dumber things I've done over the years. If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would it be? I could do with some ocean right about now. So, Aruba. What was the single last word you spoke? "It!" Which was part of "Stop it!" Which was yelled at a dog going nuts because he noticed a deer outside. Mind you, there are ALWAYS deer outside, so you'd think after four years of living in this house he'd get it through his thick head that he doesn't have to freak out over them, but…nope. Anyone who tells you that dogs are smart is lying. At least when it comes to this dog. I mean, I love him, but "smart" is not a descriptor I'd use for him.

I shall tag: @papermint-airplane, @solori, and @rollo-rolls

As always, feel free to ignore for whatever reason. :)

[wildermouse]

Warrior Nun questions for you! Shooting for oddball ones tho!

Favorite side character? Tell me why you love whoever it is!

Favorite scene where no words are spoken? Describe it and tell me what it makes you feel!

Favorite outfit that you’d love to get to wear for a photo shoot? Do you think you could pull it off or would it just be amazing fun?

Fuck/Marry/Kill/Torture/Befriend. Ava, Shotgun Mary, Beatrice, Camilla, Lilith. I’ve only seen season 1 and that was a long time ago so I had to google these and wanted to do more than the usual 3 options. Hope I picked well!

Pick a handful of favorite characters from the show and assign them each ice cream flavors that match their personalities!

oh my god i love you. go watch season 2 it is much better than season 1. it is PHENOMENAL. a masterpiece, truly.

1st season - shotgun mary. obvious reasons i think. she’s badass and so fucking funny. i miss her tremendously

2nd season - camila. adorable, also so funny, and biggest avatrice shipper of us all<3

scene where no words are spoken…. i’m gonna have to think more on that tbh. i can’t even think of a scene where no words are spoken rn. moments, yes. any silent moment of prolonged (or fleeting) eye contact between bea & ava. they say so much with their eyes

ahh my fav outfit is probably ava’s bartending outfit from s2e01 with the loose 80’s button up. also adore her overalls outfit. and her badass fighting outfit towards the end. i’d be able to pull off most of ava’s outfits i think (i wish….)

hhh fuck beatrice?? marry ava loml<3 kill mary (like mercy kill tho bc she doesn’t deserve torture) befriend camila bc i think we’d get along best. torture lilith (can it be like sexually tho or…..)

ava’s ice cream… i wanna say like salted caramel? you’d think something fun like bubblegum or rainbow sherbet but nah with those eyes and her intensity, salted caramel i think. beatrice…. chai. or something similar. chai, cinammon, coconut, matcha, etc etc complex and sweet but not overwhelmingly so. now camila i think would be rainbow sherbet or something similar, something fun. lilith fuckinnn black licorice or some shit idk.

[froggiefemboi]

I don't care about it suppose to taste like toothpaste or that the aftertaste is basically dirt

Mint is for me quite herbal and creaminess and herbalness just don't fit together.

For me, mint is always something with chewing gums, tea or medicine.

It just depends on how you grew up with it. If you had mint ice cream early on or consumed items which are similar to it, like mint chocolate, then ofc you would start to like these minty products. Just like licorice, the earlier you start eating it, the more you will like it and you can also learn to like licorice or minty food items later on, and since the only two things which your body craves naturally is salt and sugar, all your other cravings are just social adaptions of what your family and institutions had to offer.

But this isn't an excuse on any side. If someone says that mint ice cream tastes like toothpaste, it probably does for them and you should not just swipe them away and saying that they do not know what they are talking about. I once had minty ice cream (without chocolate pieces) and it tasted like cold medical tea. Am I now wrong on this assumption? No, because taste and the knowledge of what a specific taste is comes from your surroundings, when you grew up.

So the only objective thing we can agree upon is that mint tastes like mint and some people like that, because of reasons and some others don't like it, because of other reasons.

Yall can also fucking critize my fav. flavour which is Stracciatella, one of the most basic ice creams on the world, even more basic than Vanilla, because its just its plain ice cream, no flavour except the milky good creaminess of milk, and some dark chocolate pieces. If you find it too basic, or extraordinary or that it's actually gelato and not ice cream (and yes I have been critized like that) then do that, except the part with gelato and ice cream not being the same, they are. Just let me enjoy this in peace, just as others let others in peace

i said what i said

[intimidating-fettuccine]

(general question) do you think you can tell us what the creep's favorite food is?

I.. I was debating what to do for EJ as he can't eat human food.. So I listed his preferred literal human food

Also! I decided to mix things up and answer AS the creeps!

Jeff: "Pancakes, you just can't go wrong with 'em. Best way to start the day."

BEN: "Burgers are always a win in my book! Good for any occassion."

Eyeless Jack: "A nice fatty thigh is fantastic, but I'm also really fond of eyeballs as snacks... Why are you looking at me like that? It's not like I'll eat you up, silly."

Laughing Jack: "Salted caramel is just too delectible for me to place anything else at the top of the list!"

Toby: "Soups of any kind are really nice. They remind me of my mom, since she makes the best soup."

Tim: "A nice honey baked ham is a pretty damn good meal."

Brian: "Spaghetti! Maybe basic, but it just gives me the good vibes!"

Slender: "There are far too many choices for me to narrow this down to just one food. I've eaten basically every type of food.. And they're usually always delicious."

Splendor: "Anything sweet wins my vote!! It's just too hard to resist something nice and sugary."

Offender: "Anything Slender or my mom cooks is a 20/10. Those two are just on a different level in the kitchen."

Trender: "Bruschetta. Elegant and delicious, it's absolutely perfect."

Liu: "Carbonara is pretty nice! Although I'm partial to pasta in general."

Jane: "Sushi is pretty damn good! Always my go-to on a day out."

Natalie: "Grilled fish isn't half bad... I used to make it when I was younger, even caught my own fish."

Helen: "Rare steak. What? I grew up in a wealthy household, I like my steaks. Although.. Hazelnuts are also pretty tasty."

Dr. Smiley: "Curry is pretty yummy. Plus, I can make a whole bunch and have leftovers. Useful for late nights in the lab."

Sally: "Anything sweet!! Cake, candy, cupcakes, chocolate... I'm getting hungry just thinking about it!"

Jason: "Strawberries are the optimal food, but their best forms are natural or covered in chocolate. Nothing else compares to their delightful flavor."

Puppeteer: "Anything with low amounts of salt. It makes me have... Reactions, if you will. Shitty ghost biology."

Zalgo: "Beef wellington is a satisfying dish. Although.. Surely, something as sweet as you would also be quite delicious, yes...? Should I find out..?"

Candy Pop: "Everyone says I'm crazy for it, but I could go nuts for a pack of black licorice! The flavor is too strong you say? Nah, I think it's just right!"

Hobo Heart: "...Slender's homemade chicken pot pie tastes like home to me."

Nina: "Hmmm... I could go for some cake right about now!! Do you wanna go get some?? There's a lovely place just down from the castle!"

Kate: "Anything with cherries in it. I just love how tart their flavor is."

[lilisouless]

"Why can i hear so much fuss on The queen´s dining room?"

"It seems like a huge argument, they must be talking about a very delicate subject"

Zoya: I don't know why we are still arguing.The best ice cream is obviously coffee

Nikolai: Yes,AFTER salted caramel

Mal: Oh you are so pretentious,just admit is rocky road

Zoya: Pff, if you are like five

Nikolai: Yeah, what is your second favorite? Cookie dough?

Alina: Hey! don't speak ill of cookie dough!

Leoni: I like all of those, i actually think all ice cream flavors are great and unique, my favorite is cake batter but i would eat anyone as long as it has sprinkles, they are the best part of the ice cream

Adrik: Yeah, i agree

Nadia: No you don't, you allways get sick at the mere sight of color! the only ice cream you´ve ever touched is pine nuts

Adrik: First, you are a snitch! Second: i would rather have pinenuts than eating flowers

Nadia: Lavender is a perfectly edible flower!

Genya: What if we just vote? My money goes to black cherry and it already has two votes since it´s both mine and David´s favorite

Zoya: No it´s not , he hates it! He just ask for one everytime you two go out in case something happens to your cone

David: That´s true, i actually favor pistachio

Genya:ugh,really?

Misha: At least we can agree the worst is rum raising, only Baghra liked that

Alina: Well, you are what you eat

Baghra from hell : Oh bitch, you did not

Tamar: Why don't we just settle with hazel nut? I don't see why anyone would have a problem with that.let´s say that one is the best. At least all of us like ice cream like normal people,unlike someone

Tolya:I just don't get why bother on ice cream and choose one flavor when you could get natural frozen yogurt and pour on it whatever you want in that momment or even nothing if you don't feel like it

Tammar: I don't have a brother

Nina: Excuse me, we couldn't help but hear your conversation from the "cool table"

Zoya: It´s the kids table Nina, your friends and you are on the kids table

Nina: But, i am surprised no one brought the actual ice cream king on the table: Chocolate! is delisious,universally bevoled and seductive just like moi.

Matthias: How is an ice cream "seductive"?

Nina: It seduces you into eating it, like me!

Matthias: Why did i even ask?

Kaz: Let me guess Helvar,vanilla?

Matthias: No,you wanted to make a hurtful joke at my expense but no, is actually eggnog

Nina: Ha! take that Bre-eggnog? Oh no Matthias, vanilla was bland but passable, eggnog is an actual atrocity. I am afraid we´ll consider a divorce from you

Jesper: Hey,it could have been worse , like butter pecan...

Hanne: "shrinks in their sit"

Jesper: Oh, sorry. You know what, is not THAT bad. Butter pecan at least tastes naturally

Wylan: Oh here we go...

Jesper: Unlike toothpaste over here

Wylan: Mint and chocolate is a perfect and calculated combination,Jes!

Kuwei: Not as much as rainbow sherbet

Wylan: That doesn't even have a defined flavor! And since we are shaming each other on ice cream preference Jesper...

Jesper: Bacon ice cream is good! it has maple on them and i don't care you won't taste it because Milo did and he liked it!

Matthias: Jesper, Milo eats grass next to his own dung

Inej: My fave is green tea because it´s relaxing. Anyone has a problem with that?

Everyone: "No" "it´s fine" "whatever you like is perfectly okay" "if you like it surely is wonderful" "well no i hate it,but i must have bad taste"

Hanna: So, Brekker,you are the only one who hasn't shared theirs

Kaz: I won't get into this useless debate.I know the one supreme ice cream but this people are too inferior to reconigze it

Hanne: Which one is?

Kaz: Licorice as black as my soul

Inej: "coughitsaliehelovescottoncandycough"

[0-parasol-0]

It’s time to do what I do best and overthink CRK lore for a random thought I had ( ft. Me being mad that Devsis is never consistent with any of their lore )

okay so right off the bat this is going to be mostly about Espresso because I saw a post about him ( By @/biscuit-powerwalk ) and now I am. Thinking

so the eye motifs are incredibly intriguing to me and I like the latter idea of “Academy/Espresso Eye motifs being connected to an idea of knowing more than one should/having “forbidden” knowledge of this world” especially considering the fact we know very little about Espresso‘s backstory compared to other cookies

like, Madeleine comes from a royal-ish family and was given his sword and shield by the Divine when he became Knight commander, White Lily is a childhood friend of Pure Vanilla and studied magic alongside him, Espresso,,,,, hails from the republic. Yes, he’s heavily theorized to come from the coffee tribe, but there’s no canon confirmation of that (… yet) and all we know about him is accomplishments from when he was already an adult.

so that got me thinking about the dark rifts and about what if Espresso was connected to them in some larger way, combined with the fact he absolutely loathes light magic ( everyone jokes about Espresso being mean in the new event, but he’s actually pretty reasonable if you don’t bring up anything related to light magic. Yes, he didn’t know who Eclair was, but he’s also sleep deprived and busy 24/7. And even then, he was still polite when asking Eclair to lend him their books for his research. )

long story short this train of thought led me to the funky idea of Espresso being related in some way to an all-knowing ancient being. Perhaps it’s in some way connected to his brand of coffee magic? Since Latte is also a type of coffee, but maybe due to Lattes being made with milk it’s not there? Or maybe it’s specific to Espresso specifically.

anyways maybe said ancient being was connected to an all-knowing power of lands beyond, and it could see into other realities using rifts. And the rifts and Espresso’s coffee magic are connected in some way to dark magic ( and maybe dark moon magic in some way since it’s been shown to be able to open some kind of rift/portal )? And by dark I don’t mean “evil”, it’s just the antithesis to light magic in some way. ( and light magic isn’t necessarily “good” either, in my eyes. )

and that’s why Espresso hates light magic with a passion so much, in his very core it’s his antithesis. It’s dubious in my mind whether he’d actually know he’s related to this ancient being but even if he wasn’t like I imagine he is he’d still have an inherent understanding of the rifts and such because of the relation. It’s also the reason his other eye is never shown, it’s because it has some connection to the eye motifs/looks visually different from the other ( and it’s not just a case of not showing the other eye, Licorice also has an eye covered, yet we see his other one. Meanwhile Espresso’s almost always has one eye covered even if Devsis occasionally flips around his hairstyle )

Espresso isn’t evil because the powers of this all-knowing being just happen to coincide with the more “frowned upon” parts of magic. He’s still a good person and he’s firmly on the side of good now even if the all-knowing being was incredibly morally grey ( since its pursuit of knowledge was absolute even if the methods were less then morally “good” )

and theoretically if we assume my rambling thoughts to be canon then it would lead to some very interesting developments in plot. Since even in canon so far Espresso has had some ties that other cookies don’t. In the newest event, and this is a reach so take it with a grain of salt, he says even in his wildest calculations he’s never expected so many rifts. While this could be excused off as Espresso just being cautious and such I find it odd that he was able to calculate their appearance in the first place since other cookies seem to have very little knowledge of these rifts at all, much less being able to predict their appearance. I could just be overthinking this but there are a lot of coincidences that line up.

And we don’t even know what’s forming the rifts yet. The most likely explanation is Dark Echantress but it also doesn’t feel like something she’d do. In addition, in her boss fight, when the cake witch summons a monster she doesn’t use an eye circle, unlike the Red Velvet Dragon ( which comes from the rifts. ). So in my opinion it’s not DE causing this, it’s some overarching greater force of power.

TL;DR all in all I do think Espresso has a connection/knowledge of stuff most cookies don’t, but whether Devsis expands on that and his hatred of light magic anytime soon vs dropping very minor hints between each update is anyone’s guess. I would say it might not even be canon but things line up a little bit too much for it to just be a coincidence ( they could do that but it would just be wasted potential ). Either way I hope we get some more lore about him sooner rather than later

[forasecondtherewedwon]

Only in a Sitcom

Fandom: WandaVision Pairing: Darcy Lewis/Jimmy Woo Rating: T Chapter Count: 1/?

Summary: Darcy has no idea what the hell's going on with this WandaVision thing, but neither does Jimmy. It's kinda fun to have somebody to binge-watch alternate reality TV with.

The snack selection is paltry to begin with. Darcy doesn’t share, out of spite. Except with Jimmy, because he’s cool and he actually called her “Dr. Lewis” until she waved off the formality and let him use her first name. He agrees with her about the snacks. If this were purely an FBI operation instead of the mixed-jurisdiction playdate it is, he might be more defensive over the lame flavour choices. As it is, the Bureau has issued no statement taking credit for the sad, muddied, salt-and-vinegar-copycat chips, so she and Jimmy spend as much time criticizing them as eating them.

Darcy tries not to outwardly sulk any less than usual when her fancy coffeemaker arrives. She pats the box and says, “Yep, important equipment acquisition,” then lugs it to her desk, giving inquisitive glances the Dirty Harry squint until they look away.

She used to be the kind of girl to hand out coffees willy-nilly, but that kind of girl is an intern and Dr. Darcy Lewis isn’t so easy. She hoards her shiny dispenser of caffeine like a troll. If they played nice with her to start, she might be more accommodating now. Though it takes up a lot of space at her desk, it’s worth it; the coffeemaker is the one thing that doesn’t have a screen and therefore the one thing she can stare at in peace until she drags herself back to data and frequencies and scanning for other feedback and, most importantly, the greatest little ’50s (and beyond) sitcom that never was: WandaVision.

Her reasoning for a full rewatch at half speed is that she’s hoping to pick up on any other telling details, anything more modern than the time warp she’s witnessing. After Monica mentioned Ultron in the episode where Wanda gives birth, Darcy realized it was possible that there were earlier slippages. Ok, she hasn’t found any that specific yet, but on this rewatch (the third), she has help.

“How’s your cappuccino?” she hisses at Jimmy.

“It’s perfect. I want to sit in it like a hot tub,” he says back.

“Right?”

Darcy pulls at her hat, getting it to cover her ears just right. The Department of Somebody or Something has a bee in their bonnet (ha) over the transformation of that one dude into a beekeeper and they’re going in and out a lot, leaving the door open. It’s chilly. This is the kind of thing that pisses Darcy off when people don’t acknowledge it. Must all creature comforts fall by the wayside to make room for whatever-the-heck branch of engineering or nuclear something-or-other? Forget calling the people around her clowns—they are clearly reverse mimes, failing to react to something that’s definitely here: the cold of working into the night in a New Jersey field, with nothing but her perpetually overheating laptop to keep her warm. That, and coffee.

She takes a long sip of hers and sneaks a look at Jimmy to see if he seems annoyed that she spoke while they’re working. After running through the episodes so many times, she’s succumbed to the deeply human instinct to talk during the commercials. Yeah, yeah, yeah, even the commercials have meaning here—Stark toaster this, Hydra watch that—but it’s all being recorded. Her brain has designated the ads “tune out time,” and repurposed them for time spent either staring blankly at the screen or talking to Jimmy.

“Hey,” she says when she slurps from her mug too loudly and he still doesn’t complain, “you’re pretty chill.”

“Am I?”

“When you’re not talking about family planning.”

Jimmy frowns.

“I’m not getting any younger.”

“Yeah, but you’re not that old.” Darcy darts a glance at him. “You don’t look that old.”

“Thanks.”

“I’m sure it’ll happen for you,” she adds a few minutes later, when she notices the funny longing look he gets on his face at the part where Vision holds Tommy for the first time.

“Who has the time?” Jimmy uses his mug to motion towards the happy family on Darcy’s non-flat television. “Reality is a secret joint stakeout where we may be getting irradiated by the energy field over Westview. Sit-down dinners and painting the nursery only happen on TV.”

She nods along and says, “Also, hostile alien invasions.”

“Yes! How am I supposed to meet someone when it’s one supernatural catastrophe after another!”

Despite his distress, Darcy cackles.

“Man, the stories I could tell you.”

“About dating or supernatural catastrophes?”

She considers this.

“I mean, both. There’s some overlap there. Nothing serious though,” she notes calmly while Wanda screams her head off pushing out Billy. “I don’t even have a reliable apocalypse booty call to text whenever the world seems like it might end. Do you?”

“God no.”

They both pause to aww over the on-screen couple cradling their swaddled newborns.

“You want some licorice?” she asks. “I snagged it earlier and I don’t want to rattle the wrapper when we get to the scene where Monica asks Wanda about Pietro.”

She sets her mug down and retrieves the bag from behind one of the monitors, holding it out to Jimmy with her eyes still on the screen. At the sharp tug that nearly yanks the packet out of her hand, she turns to see what’s up. The pieces are stuck together and, giggling, she has to grab the licorice next to the one he’s trying to pull out. They peel them apart with a tacky sound that Darcy finds so satisfying. She tosses the bag onto the desk and leans back, crossing her leg and bobbing her foot anxiously, anticipating the ominous cut between Monica confronting Wanda and the couple bouncing the twins on the couch as the credits roll.

“Anything?” a voice asks brusquely from behind them.

Darcy whips her head around, licorice hanging out of the corner of her mouth, to find a S.W.O.R.D. agent snooping on her and Jimmy’s binge session.

“Research,” Jimmy tells the man, biting off the end of his own strand of licorice, his cappuccino raised defiantly in his other hand.

“Carry on.”

“I don’t report to you,” Jimmy mumbles after him, jamming the licorice back into his mouth to soften.

Watching him, Darcy grins. He eats his licorice the same way she does.