#yes I’ve altered them
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#as requested#yes I’ve altered them#but the baela one was slightly different#and I needed three symmetry lol#house of the dragon#fire and blood#team black#lucerys velaryon#jacaerys velaryon#baela targaryen#rhaena targaryen#hotd edit#hotd icons
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Google how to make peace with the fact that you will always be vaguely to extremely uncomfortable (depending on the day) with your body and how others perceive it until the day you die and nothing you do will ever change that
#I almost wish I was much more masc leaning than I am#so the answer would just simply be ‘go on t’#I keep seeing so many posts that are like hrt is good! this is your sign to go on hrt if you’ve ever wanted to!#GOD I wish I were that simple#(those aren’t bad posts that’s not the point they’re just not applicable to me and seeing the sentiment makes me sad and a bit frustrated)#(cuz for me it’s not that easy)#like are there some things T would do to my body that I would like?#yes absolutely. I would LOVE a deeper voice and fat redistribution#but like. that’s it#I would not want it to do anything else#in fact that idea of anything else and potentially ‘passing’ as a man makes me VISCERALLY uncomfortable#I do not want to be a man and I do not want ppl to perceive me as a man#but the same is true for being a woman#I do not like a lot of feminine traits but I do not want to strictly trade them for masculine ones#UNFORTINATELY you cannot pick and choose the affects of hrt#there is no way to ‘look androgynous’ (which is what I want)#(yes ik you can use shapewear and makeup and contour and that can do SOME)#(but it’s A LOT of work and effort I don’t have time or energy to do every day)#(and there’s still some things about my body I wouldn’t be able to alter doing stuff like that)#and it’s like sure I could go on T. but I’d still have this problem just the opposite direction#and it. sucks#it sucks so hard knowing there’s literally no conceivable way I will ever just have a body#that correlates to how I feel gender wise and will get people to ‘gender me correctly’#just based on how I look#and it’s something I’ve been thinking about recently a lot and it’s making me FHDJDKKSSKKSKS in a bad way#I know it’s cuz it’s pride month and I follow A LOT of trans ppl#who are posting trans pride and hrt and surgery info and stuff#(and obviously these are all very good things as I said)#it’s just. because of my particular situation they make me feel… bad#because I won’t ever have an option to be comfortable and happy with how I look lol
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Love you but that’s so not cool
#shadey speaks#if you have to alter someone’s meal#you don’t fucking go ahead and make a change you know they likely wouldn’t like without asking them!!!!#and then be surprised when they don’t want it#yes this is over me getting cinnamon raisin toast instead of cinnamon toast#I will not eat it and I’ve been clear on this
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i started rambling in the tags without realising how long this shit got and now i can’t add more tags, so since i can’t apologise there ill apologise here: sorry, it’s a lot, i just feel very passionately about this 😭😭
accidentally wrote another paragraph here but i deleted it cause i don’t wanna chat too much lmao
Just to make it clear, because apparently I need to, I'm not invalidating Riko Moriyama's trauma at all. I'm just saying that people justifying him doing what he did to multiple people because "he's traumatised too" isn't the argument you think it is
me being abused didn't cause me to assault anyone else, it made me go actively out of my way to not do that to someone else and got therapy to sort my shit out after years of trying to please everyone whilst trying to look tough as shit to not get fucked with
I never did half the shit Riko did because of my trauma, even when I was actively encouraged to and yet Riko, who got punished for punishing Jean, did and people justify that as "oh but he's traumatised"
Kevin and Jean are definitely dicks but only in the way that they're closed off from everyone else, they've never gone out of their way to hurt someone who did nothing wrong
trauma affects people in different ways, yes, but justifying the shit that riko did is Not it
#this#i’ve always hated the phrase ‘hurt people hurt people’ or ‘the abused becomes the abuser’ because it takes the responsibly away from abusers#yes there are clinical diagonoses out there that mean someone genuinely is unable to control their behaviour - they don’t choose it#and that’s why the insanity plea exists in courts - it demands the perpetrator be placed in a mental facility rather than a prison#but aside from that - YES trauma does affect the way people develop and process emotions and events which of course changes how they react#it can cause trust issues communication issues can make people easy to anger which can cause them to lash out#it can do all sorts of things to the body and to the brain that i won’t pretend to understand beyond my own experience#but it does NOT alter your ability to make choices#the insanity plea does not exist for people who experienced trauma and later went on to abuse others#people with trauma are still responsible for their own actions despite the fact that their trauma impacts the choices the WANT to make#so when people say ‘hurt people hurt people’ it should NOT MEAN#‘people who are abused should be absolved from blame because the abuse they suffered made them unable to choose to do the bad thing’#it SHOULD MEAN: ‘people who are abused struggle to form healthy relationships during and after their abuse because the way they developed#was interrupted and harmed this changing how they process stimuli and how they regulate emotions#which can hurt people in the crossfire: people who are burned by their inability to communicate - their quick tempers#or other more trauma-specific ptsd symptoms#the fact is that riko was not insane he MADE THE CHOICE to act the way he did and YES that choice was influenced by the abuse he faced from#tetsuji but that choice was his to make alone#that’s literally the whole tragedy of riko’s story#tetsuji raised riko as a nothing - a worthless castaway he didn’t even consider human enough to raise#and riko said okay i’m not human but id rather be a monster than a nobody and i am owed the power to become a monster#that was his choice#and that’s why it’s tragic#because he didn’t have to make that choice but he did#and he enjoyed it - he loved hurting people (he tells neil that EXPLICITLY) and so he CHOOSES to continue to do it -#that has nothing to do with proving himself to tetsuji or his family or earning his father’s attention#at the end of the day he hurt people because he wanted to#that includes kevin jean neil andrew and seth#gonna leave it here cause i’ve said a lot but THANK YOU op for this post 🙏🙏#aftg
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middle of the night
pairing: boyfriend! san x fem! reader
genre: pure smut
summary: these days, san can never seem to get a good night’s rest, that is, until he’s able to completely unload himself inside his pretty little girlfriend. good thing you‘re laying right next to him.
w.c: 2.1k
warnings: mean dom! san, subby painslut! reader, both of these mfs are nymphos, somno that turns into full blown sex (they have an established agreement and there is strict consent involved), san’s got a big curved cock as per usual, pet names/name calling, praise/degradation, manhandling, tit play, spit, finger sucking, pussy slapping, marking, possessiveness, spanking, vaginal/anal sex also known as the two for one special <3 (psa: never switch from ass to pussy irl btw), rough altered missionary/doggy/back to missionary, san puts reader in a headlock (muahahahah), creampies, squirting, breeding kink, bulge kink, dumbification, brief oral, san eats his own cum out of reader, this is really filthy btw i should be locked up :3c
a/n: i literally can’t stop writing bc of the horneee that is constantly brought upon me against my will 😞 it’s all san’s fault </3 also i realized i’ve only written one fic about somno like two thousand years ago even tho it’s in my top ten kinks so i gotta fix that <3 *screams* i hope you enjoy this as much as i enjoyed coming up with it~
song recs: angel by massive attack - beware by deftones (GRRRRRRRR BARK BARK)
San couldn’t seem to stop tossing and turning in bed, forcing his eyes shut and waiting for one side of his pillow to grow far too hot for comfort, before letting out a frustrated groan and rolling onto his other side, his cheek squished against the feathered pillow. Squinting at the glowing analog clock on the bedside table across from him, San blinked a few times, his eyes getting used to the darkness inside the room. It was already nearing dawn and he still hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep. There had to be some kind of solution.
It was then that you shifted besides him, emitting a soft moan and rolling onto your back, your loose tank top lowered just enough so that one of your tits had popped out of it, creating another obstacle for San to overcome, one that wouldn’t let him fall asleep until he confronted it.
“Fuck,” San whispered to himself, pushing the covers down far enough to confirm his growing problem. With half-closed, tired eyes, your boyfriend watched his cock repeatedly throb upwards against his loose black sweatpants, as if it was begging him to do something, and quick.
Hs thought back to a conversation you had earlier that week, one you brought up after he had just got done fucking you all over the house in every position imaginable. Like many of your sex marathons, it was initiated because of something simple — you being bent over the washing machine to fill it up with a load of detergent, which, of course, led to San filling you up with his own load in every possible area of your house, including the back patio when you tried to water your poor succulents.
“Sannie, you might as well fuck me when I’m asleep too, at this point,” you giggled, running your fingers through San’s soaked hair, admiring the way he looked in between your legs, with his mouth and tongue exploring your leaking, cum-filled cunt.
“You mean that, angel? My dumb slut wants me to fuck her even dumber in her sleep?” he asked in between licks, humming softly as he continued to languidly clean you up after the destruction he caused to your used hole. It was his favorite pastime, besides rearranging your insides and painting them white with his seed, of course.
Moaning at his mean words, you tugged on his hair, rubbing your soaked pussy in his face like you always did. “Yes, I mean it, baby. Now, shut up and clean up your mess.”
Before San knew it, he was hovering over you, your thighs wide open and resting against his own, your loose, nonexistent sleep shorts tossed to the side so that he could eagerly rub his slick cock along your plush folds, his thick, calloused fingers exploring every inch of your heated skin, groping at your soft thighs, your hips and waist, eventually getting distracted by your tits, rolling your tank top up over them until they spilled out into his greedy hands. He squeezed and rolled them around, bringing his drooling mouth down to your chest to drag his hot tongue up and over your tits until they shined with his spit, pinching your puffy nipples in between his teeth until you whined out in your sleep, feeling your arousal leak out onto his pulsing cock when he finally pushed inside.
“Mmn, my angel is such a good little cocksleeve, so fucking wet for me even in her sleep,” San sighed lovingly to himself, sucking one of your tits into his mouth, spitting on it for good measure, before exchanging it for the other, moaning around your soft flesh, his eyes never leaving your pretty flushed face, even though you weren’t even awake to look down at him.
Unable to hold himself back, he began to buck his hips wildly into you like he always ended up doing when your tight, warm cunt sucked him in the way it did, the headboard beginning to bang loudly against the wall behind it. Grunting, San licked up from your spit-laced chest to your neck, sucking and biting into it, leaving his mark on you. “My baby, my sweet girl, you’re mine, all mine, even when you’re dreaming,” he whispered against your slick skin, slowly pulling back when he heard the breathy gasps you were letting out turn into full-blown moans.
“S-sannieee, I’m so full,” you voiced in a sleepy tone, reaching up to rub your tired eyes, studying your boyfriend’s rosy cheeks and lips, the way his drenched hair stuck to his forehead, a few drops of sweat landing on your face, unable to look away from his intensely dark, lust-filled gaze. “Is my pussy making Sannie go crazy?”
A low growl erupted from San’s throat, a vein starting to grow taut against his skin, now that he was pounding into you with abandon, reaching up underneath your thighs to forcibly fold you in half like you were nothing but a doll for him to use. “Your slutty cunt always drives me crazy, princess, so be good and take responsibility, hm?”
Barely able to breath now that you were akin to origami, your brain grew delightfully fuzzy from the lack of oxygen, encouraging the hazy, half-asleep state you were still in and the oversized cock that was being driven relentlessly into your cervix to work in tandem until pleasure overtook your body to the point of orgasm. “Fuck, Sannie, baby, fffuuck, I’m cumming…!”
“Oh, my dirty girl, creaming yourself so soon?” San mused with his lips quirked into a shit-eating grin, his dimples and canine teeth on display. Just as your eyes begin to disappear underneath your fluttering eyelids, San suddenly grabbed you by the chin, reaching down in between your sweaty bodies to smack his hand down roughly against your spasming cunt. “Look at me when you’re squirting on my cock, baby. You know better.”
“S-sannie, it’s so, oh my god–” you cried out, opening your mouth to moan and instead feeling his thumb slide over your tongue, your lips closing around it. You continued to suck on his thumb as he fucked you through your first mind melting orgasm of the night, biting into it when he smacked your cunt again with his free hand.
“Owww, bad girl.” San watched you lick and suck on his thumb with a lecherous smile plastered on his red, sweaty face, rubbing his other thumb roughly into your puffy clit, rolling it in circles until he felt your thighs trembling nonstop against his moving body, suddenly stopping his movements to sheath himself fully inside you, groaning heavily as he flooded your pulsing cunt with his hot load. “Mm, you feel that, princess? I’m pumping all my cum into this slutty womb of yours, so I can get you nice and knocked up for me…You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
Just as he pulled his thumb out of your drooling mouth, you clasped your hands onto his cheeks, looking up at him hearts in your teary eyes, and begging, “Yes, Sannie, I like it, love it so much. Can I have more?”
And there it was. You might’ve been the love of his life and his beautiful angel of a girlfriend, but you were still his personal breeding bitch at the end of the day — and in the middle of this hazy, sleepless night.
“Oh, yeah?” San hummed, slowly pulling out of you and running his fingers through his wet hair, just for it to fall back into his half-lidded eyes, watching as his cum began to flood out of your gaped, fluttering hole. He wanted nothing more than to eat it out of you, his mouth watering at the thought of tasting the warm saltiness mixed with your sweet squirt on his lips, but he still had to pursue his mission of pleasing his baby. “My little slut still hasn’t had enough?”
“No, Sannieee, I need your cock in my other breeding hole. Please?” you whined softly, pouting up at him, hoping you’d get your way now that you were fired up and desperate for him to fill and own as many of your holes as he could before the both of you fell victim to drowsiness.
San closed his eyes to ground himself for a second, not even fully prepared for the filth that you exuded, despite being quite the pervert himself. When he opened his eyes back up, he looked down, his curved cock now painfully stiff and twitching upwards into his heaving abdomen, somewhat winded from how hard he had been fucking you just a moment ago. “Head down, ass up, little slut. Don’t make me ask twice.”
And just like that, you were lying with your head pressed into bed, drooling heavily from both ends, getting saliva onto the arousal stained mattress, your sopping wet cunt pushing out all of San’s load and causing it to drip down your inner thighs, your weak, bruised knees wobbling beneath you, your ass being relentlessly pounded into by your ravenous boyfriend. “Gonna cum, gonna cum–”
Your warning was cut off by a sharp gasp, just as San’s hand collided with the side of your reddened ass, his fingers grabbing into the soft, sensitive flesh until you whimpered pathetically. “You’re such a filthy slut, aren’t you?” he growled between gritted teeth, smacking the other side of your ass and making you cry out before you could answer him properly. He suddenly pulled out of your ass and forced himself back into your cunt, stuffing you completely full, hunching over you so that he could put you in a headlock, loose enough so that you remained conscious, but tight enough so that you could feel deliciously dizzy. “You’re my filthy slut. All mine to fuck raw, to ruin, to breed. Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you whispered hoarsely, opening your mouth up to accept his tongue inside when he closed in on you, feeling breathless once he manipulated your body until you were back underneath him, your legs near your head, his cock so deep inside your cunt that the tip of it created a prominent bulge inside your stomach, one that San was already palming as he began to shudder, his lips, teeth and tongue attacking your neck again to leave more marks, darker ones that you would have to put concealer over before you went to work the following morning. “That’s it, that’s it, cum inside me, San, please, make me yours!”
“You’ve been mine since the beginning, angel, but I’ll make you mine again, and again, and again,” San exhaled onto your lips, wrapping his arms protectively around you, his cock completely sheathed inside you, his tip just about kissing the entrance of your cervix, your bodies so entangled together, neither of you knew where the other began. You gazed into each other’s hazy eyes, moaning into each other’s open mouths, as another seemingly endless flood of thick, hot cum claimed your womb. “I love you so fucking much, it hurts.”
“I love you too, San,” you sighed back, caressing his heated face, your fingers slipping into his hair just as he began to lower himself down, shuddering at the sensation of his lips and teeth making their mark on your chest, abdomen, hips, then gasping when he made his way to your center, his hot tongue slipping inside your pulsing cunt.
Like every time before, San ate his warm load out of you like a starved man, his nose nudging your sensitive clit as he moved his head in an up and down motion, coaxing more of the saltiness onto his tongue, reaching up to rapidly rub your clit just because he could, pleased with the way you began to cry and shake, your warm squirt pouring down his throat. He swallowed it all down with a low, pleased groan, dragging his tongue up and over your used, puffy cunt to collect the last few drops of nectar, before he finally felt tired enough to collapse down onto the bed next to you.
With the last ounce of his strength, he pulled you into his arms, pressing a kiss to your forehead, then to your lips, letting you taste your combined essence. “Bedtime?” San whispered, cradling and rubbing your cheeks with his thumbs, looking at you with a fondness that bordered obsession. He chuckled softly, giving you a dimpled smile. “I promise I won’t wake you up again.”
“You won’t wake me up, but you still might fuck me in my sleep? Huh, nympho?” you teased jokingly, cradling his face back, so close that you breathed in the same air, your eyes never leaving his, despite how heavy your eyelids began to feel. “I need my sleep, you know.”
San was in a similar state, starting to drift off, his hands leaving your face so that he could wrap them protectively around you. “Sorry, baby. I’ll try to be quieter next time,” he murmured, letting out a soft giggle, pressing a kiss to your lips just as his eyes began to close. “Just don���t be mad at me when you wake up with my cock still inside you…”
Leaving a kiss on his nose, your eyes started to close as well, completely relaxing into your boyfriend’s warm embrace. “I’ll be mad if it’s not still inside me.”
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© kitten4sannie, 2024.
#dividers made by @ioveartfilm#cultofdionysusnet#cromernet#ateez#ateez smut#choi san#san ateez#san smut#san x reader#ateez fanfic#ateez x reader#kpop smut
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Phantom in the League pt.2
The Reality of Phantom
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The atmosphere in the Watchtower had become decidedly less tense after Danny’s revelation. The League was still processing the idea of one of their own being the ruler of an entire interdimensional ghostly kingdom, but they were professionals. They’d seen stranger things.
Well, most of them had. Flash was still stuck on something that Danny had casually dropped during the initial conversation. The speedster tapped his foot impatiently, waiting for the right moment to bring it up.
“Okay, okay, hold up,” Flash finally blurted out, snapping his fingers as the thought clicked into place. “You said your name is Danny Fenton, right?”
Danny, who had been silently dreading this part of the conversation, nodded hesitantly. “Uh, yeah. That’s me.”
“And you’re a teenager?” Flash asked, narrowing his eyes suspiciously as he zipped over to scrutinize Danny’s face up close.
“Last time I checked, yeah,” Danny replied, leaning back slightly from Flash’s sudden invasion of personal space.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. So you’re telling me you’re not some ancient ghost who’s been around for centuries, pulling strings from behind the scenes?” Flash’s eyes were wide with shock. “You’re just… a kid?”
“Hey!” Danny protested, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’m not just a kid. I’ve been through a lot, okay?”
Wonder Woman stepped in, placing a calming hand on Flash’s shoulder. “Barry, remember what we discussed about making assumptions?”
Flash blinked and gave her a sheepish smile. “Right, sorry. It’s just… wow. You’re younger than some of the villains we’ve fought.”
Green Lantern rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, glancing at Batman, who remained as stoic as ever. “Uh, so… not to be insensitive or anything, but you’re, uh, you’re dead, right? Like… you’re a ghost?”
Danny sighed, rubbing the back of his head. “Yeah. Half-ghost, technically. But, yeah. I died… sort of.”
The room fell into a brief silence, the weight of Danny’s words settling over them. It wasn’t something the League was accustomed to dealing with—death was part of their lives, yes, but having a teammate who had already crossed that threshold was… different.
Superman, ever the symbol of hope, stepped forward, his voice gentle. “Danny, we won’t ask how it happened. It’s not our place, and we respect your privacy. But if you ever need to talk about it, we’re here for you.”
Danny offered him a grateful smile. “Thanks, Supes. It’s, uh, a bit of a sensitive subject. But I appreciate it.”
Batman, who had been observing quietly, finally spoke up. “If you’re the King of the Infinite Realms, that means you’re responsible for a vast number of spirits and entities. Your age doesn’t change the fact that you’re capable of handling this responsibility. We trust your judgment.”
“Plus,” Flash added with a grin, “you’ve got us to back you up. We’ll make sure you don’t get overwhelmed with all that kingly stuff.”
Danny chuckled, feeling some of the tension ease. “Thanks, guys. It’s nice to know I’ve got some backup, especially when things get… complicated.”
There was a brief pause before Green Lantern asked the question everyone had been thinking but was too polite to voice. “So… do you, like, age? Or are you stuck as a teenager forever?”
Danny shrugged. “I honestly don’t know. Clockwork—you know, the Master of Time—he’s my mentor, and he’s hinted that I might age slower now, but he’s never been clear on the details.”
Batman nodded, his mind already analyzing the implications. “You’re in a unique situation. If your aging process is altered, it could affect how we approach future missions and strategies involving you.”
“Yeah,” Flash chimed in, grinning. “But, hey, look on the bright side! You get to be the youngest member of the League indefinitely! Think of all the birthday parties we can throw.”
Danny laughed, shaking his head. “As long as you don’t make a big deal out of it, I’m good with that. And for the record, I don’t really do birthdays. Kind of lost the appeal after, well, you know… dying.”
The room fell into a brief, awkward silence before Flash cleared his throat. “Right, sorry. Didn’t mean to make it weird.”
“It’s fine,” Danny reassured him with a smile. “I’m just still getting used to all this myself.”
Superman nodded. “We’ll respect your boundaries, Danny. You’ve already proven yourself to us time and time again. Your age doesn’t change that.”
“Agreed,” Wonder Woman added. “You are more than capable, Danny, and your youth is not a weakness. If anything, it speaks to your strength and resilience.”
Danny felt a warm surge of gratitude toward his teammates. He had been worried about how they’d react to the truth, but they had accepted him without hesitation. “Thanks, everyone. I guess I’ve been carrying this around for a while, and it feels good to finally let you all in on it.”
Batman’s voice, as calm and commanding as ever, broke the brief silence. “We’ll need to adjust some of our protocols now that we know the full extent of your abilities and responsibilities. But for now, we have more pressing matters to attend to. The dimensional rifts.”
“Right,” Danny agreed, snapping back to business mode. “I think I can close them, but I’ll need to figure out what’s causing them first. It could be something from the Realms leaking into your world.”
“Then we’ll start by monitoring the rifts and gathering as much data as possible,” Batman stated, already strategizing. “And Danny, if you need to access any resources from the Watchtower to help with your investigation, you have full clearance.”
Danny grinned, feeling more confident than he had in a long time. “Thanks, Bats. I’ll take you up on that.”
As they all prepared to leave the briefing room, Flash lingered for a moment, leaning in close to Danny with a conspiratorial grin. “So… do you have ghostly powers that let you pull pranks? Because I’ve got some ideas.”
Danny’s eyes sparkled with mischief. “Oh, you have no idea, Barry. Just wait until you see what I can do.”
With that, the two exchanged a knowing look, and Danny couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief. The truth was out, and despite the initial awkwardness, the League had accepted him for who he was—both as Danny and as Phantom.
And with that acceptance came a new sense of belonging, one that made the title of King of the Infinite Realms feel just a little bit lighter.
pt. 1
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don’t mind me, im just mass posting my drafts rn👩🦯
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Synastry Observations Pt.2
materialist🔖
DISCLAIMER: These are just my personal observations and are meant for entertainment purposes only; it may not resonate with everyone due to the nuances of astrology. Please respect my work and avoid copying or stealing it. Enjoy reading!! 🍊⭐️
🍊 Mars in the 12th house synastry has got to be one of the worst things 😭. It’s confusing and exhausting. The Mars person seems to harbour some sort of irrational animosity towards the house person in a very passive-aggressive way. The house person can sense this too, but they are unsure if they’re making it up or not. Also, it’s such a blockage; you could be really close to each other and know of each other, but the conversation WOULD TAKE AGES to start because neither the house person nor the Mars person wants to initiate conversation. It’s like there’s an invisible barrier between you guys 🥲
🍊 Venus in the 8th house/ in Scorpio’s first romantic relationship or situation always ends up hurting them. I’ve seen this countless times where their first experience with romance either ends in heartbreak, unrequited love, or just a missed opportunity. This heartbreak helps these individuals immensely transform, and they might prefer to isolate themselves from anything romance-related for a long period of time. Honestly I think this is a canon event for every Scorpio/8th house Venus that I’ve met, including me lmao and especially if there are Venus-Saturn hard aspects, dear lord, sending love to all my scorp/8th house placements fr🫶🏻🥲❤️🩹
🍊 Something I’ve observed with Libra placements, especially the moon, is that when they’re in a relationship, it becomes the focal point of their life. They might go as far as changing career paths to be closer to their partner, altering their style to match their partner’s preferences, or adjusting their personality to be more appealing to their partner (yes I’m sure most of us do this to some extent but it’s a bit excessive for these peeps😭). Their relationship becomes such a central part of their identity that if anything goes wrong, it can feel devastating for them. For instance, I have a friend who is a Libra moon, and she always refers to her partner as “my boyfriend” instead of his name, even though we all know him personally, like gurl come on he’s got a name haha😭
🍊 Moon in the 12th house synastry can equate to the house person opening up to the moon person or just feeling extremely vulnerable around them. They’d share things with the moon person that they dare not share with anyone else. This synastry could also mean staying up late in the night and throwing your sleep away just to talk to each other 🧿
🍊 12th house synastry could also have undertones of enemies-to-lovers (the lovers part only if you ever get together, that is) because there’s this energy where you don’t know why the other person acts hostile/passive-aggressive towards you, ignores you, or sends you mixed signals that makes you dislike them but at the same time, you can’t stop fantasizing/dreaming about them in all these romantic scenarios or them showing up in your dreams outta nowhere like??😭
🍊 7th/8th and even 10th (to some extent) house synastry could indicate that one of the two, either the house person or the planet person (mostly the house person), copies the other, be it mannerisms, clothes, slang, or even certain traits of the other’s personality 💀. It’s because they notice how much attention or admiration the planet person garners, so to obtain that same kind of attention and recognition the house person might try to emulate the planet person 🫤
🍊 7th house Mars synastry can be very annoying and tiresome (especially for the house person). The Mars person could be a bit too much for the house person. The Mars person could get very petty and passive-aggressive towards the house person for no reason (this could go vice versa too). Yes there is sexual attraction and y’all could motivate/support each other through stuff but at the same time it’s draining asf, a big no no for me when it comes to synastry 🥲
🍊 Moon square Saturn synastry can cause delays when it comes to emotional attachment between two people, but once these two finally connect, it’s ride or die typa relationship fr 🥺🫂
🍊 Moon/Mercury in the 1st/5th/9th house synastry is very exciting and fun-loving, with lots of playful teasing and bantering with each other 😋🥰
🍊Moon /Mercury in the 2nd/4th/8th/10th/12th house synastry makes both parties very sensitive to each other’s words because these houses reflect our self esteem/self worth, the deepest parts of ourselves, our core, our reputation etc. A little bit of critique can also be taken personally by either party. Even harmless jokes could be taken in the wrong way and arguments could occur (especially if there isn’t 3rd/5th/9th/11th house synastry or any easy aspects in the synastry chart)
🍊 When someone's planets fall in your 8th house, they intuitively sense your true and deep needs related to that planet. For example, if someone's Venus is in your 8th house, they will know how to love you in a way that makes you feel unconditionally loved and appreciated. If their Mercury is in your 8th house, they will understand how to communicate with you on a profound level, meeting your need for deep and meaningful conversation. If their Mars is in your 8th house, they will instinctively know how to meet your sexual needs and desires and please you in bed🖤❤️🔥
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banner credits : @anitalenia <3
#astrology#astrology notes#astro notes#astrology blog#synastry#synastry observations#composite#synastry notes#venus synastry#8th house synastry#12th house synastry#astro basics#astro blog#astro observations#astro community#astrology observations#mars synastry#moon synastry#synastry overlays#synastry astrology#astrology content#house overlays#12th house#saturn synastry#mars in scorpio#scorpio#aries#leo#10th house#astro tumblr
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Little Black Dress
➪the one where you and the pogues are invited to a fancy party at the cameron’s, and jj can’t seem to keep his hands (and lips) off you.
Warnings: smut, fluff, kook reader, pda, semipublic smut, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, established relationship, altered plot, swearing, dom jj
Word Count: 3.7k
Do not repost this anywhere, reblogs are fine ♡
“No,” was the first word that came out of JJ’s mouth as soon as you stepped out of your bedroom wearing the newest article of clothing that was added to your wardrobe. It was a simple but cute black dress you thought would look nice on you at the dinner party the Cameron’s were throwing at their house. “Absolutely not.”
Apparently JJ thought differently. “What?” You frowned, looking down at the dress self-consciously. “I thought it looked nice. Cute, you know?”
“Cute?” JJ asked in disbelief, uncrossing his arms as he stood up straight from his slouched position against the wall. “No, you don’t look cute, Y/n. You look fucking hot. Go change.”
A startled laugh escapes you as you look back up at him. “Wait, you think I look hot, yet you want me to go change?”
JJ nodded, and it looked like he was struggling to keep his eyes locked on yours instead of letting them trail up and down your body. “Yes,” he answered as it was the easiest question he’d ever been asked. “It’s bad enough that this is the best I could find, I don’t need you showing me up even more than you already do.”
He gestures to his simple white button up and dress pants he wore when he was a waiter for about three hours before he got fired. You laughed as you looked him up and down. “I think you look hot, too,” you shrug. “I don’t want you to go change though.”
“Baby,” he nearly whined as he reached for your hips. “Please go change into something that won’t give me a boner all throughout fucking dinner. John B will never let me live it down.”
You laugh again and brace your hands on his shoulders as you stand in between his legs. “You can make it through one dinner Jay,”
JJ groaned and leaned in to rest his forehead on your shoulder, his hands trailing further down your body. “One dinner might as well be one hundred,” he hummed, his hands skimming past your lower back.
“JJ,” you warn and he lifts his head to give you an innocent look. “Don’t start, alright? You’ll just make things harder.”
It was a poor choice of words, and you knew that the second you saw the smirk form on his lips. “I know one thing that’s already hard,”
You scoff and push him away with a laugh. “That’s your own fault,” you shrug again and begin walking away from him.
“My fault?” He muttered as he followed after you. “You come out wearing the hottest dress I’ve ever seen and it’s my fault for reacting to it?”
“Yes,” you answer, stepping outside into the cool summer air. It was deathly hot earlier, but thankfully it had cooled down pretty significantly now that it was nearing the evening. “You just had to go ahead and touch me when you knew we need to leave soon.”
“I won’t apologize for that,” he shrugged just as John B pulled up in The Twinkie.
“You’ll just have to deal with it,” you mumble as Pope opens the back door for you.
JJ muttered something under his breath, then he was getting into the van as well and sitting extremely close to you. “Everything okay back there?” Kie asked when she turned around from her place in the passenger seat and saw just how squished you were between Pope and JJ.
“Yeah, Kie,” your boyfriend replied, reaching around you to push on Pope’s shoulder. He took the hint and moved to sit across from you instead, and you glared at JJ.
“That was rude,” you whisper, gently nudging his side with your elbow. “He was keeping me company.”
JJ leaned in close so his lips were brushing against the shell of your ear. “I’m all the company you need,” he murmured and you froze for a second and had to hold back a surprised moan. “And you look fucking hot in this dress. I can’t wait to take it off you at the party.”
You actually did whimper as you turned to gaze up at him with wide eyes, and he just smirked at you as Kie let out a laugh of disbelief. “Guys, are we seriously going to the fucking Cameron’s for a dinner party?”
John B looked over at her as he turned left down the street that leads to the fancier part of town. “Hey, Sarah really wants us to come. I promised her we would be there,” he defended his girlfriend. “And you can’t lie and tell me that you haven’t been actually getting along with her.”
“Sarah’s fine,” Kie mumbled. “The rest aren’t.”
“Give them a chance, Kie,” Pope said from his place behind her. “We gave Y/n a chance, and now she’s one of us. Richer than all of us combined, but still one of us.”
JJ lifted his head from where it was against your neck and glared at his friend. “Shut up, Pope,” he grunted, pulling you tighter against his side. “Y/n was never like that. She never gave us a reason to not like her.”
You smile at him and press a chaste kiss to his cheek, one that had him fighting off a grin as he turned to his left and reached around the driver’s seat to grab John B’s shoulder.
“Unlike this one, who is dating the girl who cost him his job with her dad,” he added and John B flipped him off through the rearview mirror.
“Sarah’s not like that, either,”
“Whatever you say,” JJ laughed, leaning back and looking down at you with poorly hidden lust in his eyes.
You had to keep your eyes off him for the rest of the ride, otherwise you were sure you would end up doing something indecent to him in front of your friends.
When you arrived at Sarah’s house, she ran out and greeted you all before kissing John B and tugging him inside. Pope scoffed as he watched the two disappear inside the massive house, “Oh, don’t worry, we’ll just find our own way around your giant fucking mansion,”
Kie laughed and shoved him a bit as the two of them walked through the double doors, leaving you and JJ outside. He turned to you with a pleading look, his hand reaching for yours. “We can still go back,” he tempted you by wiggling his brows. “I can think of many things that are a lot more fun than sitting down with a bunch of Kooks for three hours.”
You roll your eyes and take his hand, lacing your fingers with his. “Come on, party boy,” you laughed as you pulled him with you. “You can make it through a few hours.”
JJ groaned but followed after you. “Alright, but I’m telling you right now, I won’t be able to take my hands off you when we’re at the table,”
You blushed and tried pulling your hand out of his, but he just pulled you closer then wrapped his arm around your waist. Pope, who was standing in the entryway of the dining room must’ve heard JJ’s dirty promise, as he snorted before saying, “Might not be able to live up to that, JJ,”
JJ furrowed his brows then looked over Pope’s shoulder. “No way,”
John B was sitting across the table from Sarah, Rafe, who looked hilariously miserable, was sitting across from Wheezie, and Ward was sitting across from Rose. “Oh,” you trailed off, watching as John B and Sarah practically eye fucked each other. “Guys sit across from the girls..?” You asked, earning a tight nod from Rose before she downed whatever was in her glass. She clearly didn’t want to be here either, and it was her own house.
“Y/n,” Ward greeted with a charming smile that faded when he looked to your left and at your boyfriend. “JJ…welcome. Come on in, have a seat.”
JJ turned to you with a look of warning in his eyes. “Let’s go,” he mumbled. “I’m serious.”
You bit back a laugh and quickly escaped his hold in order to sit next to Kie. Pope sighed before sitting across from her, leaving JJ to sit in between him and Rafe.
“Fuck,” he muttered, knowing damn well that he would only ever do something like this for you and you only. With a barely hidden eye roll, he sits next to Rafe and Pope, refusing to acknowledge the Kook next to him as he looks at you from across the table. “This is fucked.” He mouthed to you just as Ward stood up.
You held back a laugh as you broke eye contact in order to pay attention to the man you were sure Sarah begged to let her organize this whole thing. “I just want to thank you all for coming. I know things have been tense lately, but I think this is a great opportunity for us all to get to know each other. It’s always nice to know who my little girl is hanging around with these days,” he nodded at Sarah who just smiled at him. “With that being said, enjoy the food, everyone.”
With the ice being broken, you watched as almost everyone began picking at the food on their plates. Everyone except JJ, who just braced his elbows on the table and stared at you. You nodded towards his plate, but he shook his head. “This is torture,” he mouthed and you softly glared at him.
“Eat,” you mouthed back, your eyes flickering between his and his plate. “What is your issue?”
“I can’t touch you,” he mouthed a little too audibly, earning a glare from Rafe that JJ promptly ignored.
You gave him a pointed look, and when he still made no move to pick up his fork, you gently kicked his leg under the table. He jumped slightly, his eyes widening as if he couldn’t believe you actually just did that, then he huffed defeatedly and grabbed his fork.
You smile then pucker your lips at him, laughing at the way he rolled his eyes but let a small grin form on his face.
Soon enough everyone was having their own little conversations, and it was going surprisingly okay, but despite your best efforts, you were getting bored. You could tell that JJ was, too, as he grabbed his glass and spun the liquid around instead of actually drinking it.
When Ward announced that he was going to go get dessert, an idea formed in your head and you smirked. You lean back in your chair and kick your heels off from under the table, then you extend your leg out until your foot grazes JJ’s knee. Your smirk grew when he jumped again, nearly spilling his drink as he registered that it was you who was touching him.
He met your eyes with a look of warning, but you ignored it. Just as Ward came back with two trays of cake and pie, you slid your foot higher until it was trailing along JJ’s thigh, and his knees hit the underside of the table as he reached under and grabbed hold of your ankle. “Y/n,” he muttered, ignoring the many sets of eyes on him at the loud noise. “Come with me.”
Your smirk faded as he gently pushed your leg away from him then stood up, and you had to hold back a moan at the dangerous look in his eyes. “Why?” You managed to ask as Ward set the trays down onto the table.
“Now,” was the answer you were given, then JJ looked over at Ward. “You don’t mind if we’re excused for a few minutes, do you?”
He really wasn’t asking, and Ward knew that as he nodded and sat back down. “Not at all, take your time,” he was honestly probably happy to have you and JJ leave, even if just for a little while.
JJ turned back to you then made a beeline for the doorway, and you were left to quickly stand up and follow after him on shaky legs. “Sorry, we…we forgot..something,” you make up the worst excuse of your life before fleeing the room in search of your riled up boyfriend.
You hadn’t even made it halfway down the hallway before a hand wrapped around your wrist and you were pulled towards JJ’s chest. “You got some nerve, you know that?” He asked and before you could say a word, he pressed his lips to yours and effectively shut you up. You whined against his mouth when he deepened the kiss, then he pulled away and left you craving more. JJ hummed as he lifted his hand and tugged at your bottom lip. “What do you say, baby? Why don’t we explore this house a bit?”
Nodding and in a daze, he takes your hand in his and pulls you along with him as he heads towards the staircase. He let out a low whistle as you and he ascended the stairs, and you were breathless, too, but for a different reason.
“Look at this fucking place,” he grunted, glancing at you as you and he reached the second floor. “Look at all these empty rooms.”
You swallow hard as he grabs your hips and pushes you against a wall. “JJ,” you whisper and he smirks before leaning down and kissing you. Your arms wrap around his neck as you moan into the kiss, just as needy as he is even though you were better at hiding it. “Are we really doing this?”
JJ pulled away and took your hand again. “Oh yeah, we’re doing this,” he answered and you gave him a wide eyed look that he scoffed at. “Don’t give me that look, you’re the one who decided to tease me under the table.”
Your eyes widened as he opened a random door and pulled you in with him. “My heels, Jay,” you gasp. “They’re still down there. Oh, my God, that makes it so obvious as to what we’re doing.”
JJ raised a brow. “Baby, I think it was obvious from the second we left that table,” he laughed then turned to observe the room he chose. “Jesus, even the bathrooms are massive.”
You huff out a quiet laugh and start to walk around him to observe the room yourself, but you don’t get very far before JJ wraps his arms around you and pulls you back to him. You stumble a bit but then are lifted up and set on the marble countertop next to the sink. “You’re impatient,” you tease, running your hands along his shoulders.
“Can you blame me?” He asked, leaning in and kissing your neck. “You look so hot, baby.”
You whimper at his words, tugging on his shirt. “JJ,”
“I know,” he groaned, lifting you up effortlessly and sliding your panties down your legs. “Baby, I love you, but if you ever make me go to another dinner party with a bunch of fucking Kook’s, I might never speak to you again.”
His threat was empty and it had you laughing before you cut yourself off with a moan as he sunk to his knees and wrapped his lips around your clit. His hands pushed your sinful dress up until it pooled around your waist, and you reached out to grab hold of his hair. “Oh, fuck,” you bite your lip and looked cautiously at the closed door.
You’d been secretly turned on since the second you saw JJ dressed in his take on a formal outfit, and that much was clear as his tongue poked out to run along your already soaked slit. JJ hummed at the feeling of your wetness coating his taste buds, “I knew you needed this just as much as I did,”
Your face heats up as you place your other hand flat on the counter behind you. “You dressed yourself, you know how good you look, Jay,”
He laughed, pulling away as he tugged your body closer to the edge of the counter. JJ pressed his cheek against your knee as he stared up at you, sliding one of his hands up your thigh until his fingers were ghosting over your core. “You want me to get you off on my tongue, baby? Or do you want the real thing?”
You bite your lip as his index and middle fingers slip into you. “I want,” you trial off, wanting him to make you come more than once during this little sneak off from the party, but you also didn’t want to ditch them for too long. You whine as you pull him so he is standing up, and you tug him towards you while reaching down to grope him through his pants. “I want this.”
JJ smirked, kissing you deeply as he pushed your dress down and palmed your breasts in his much bigger hands. You moan into the kiss as you unzip his dress pants and push them and his boxers down just enough to free his hard cock. He slipped his tongue into your mouth as you guided his tip up and down your soaked folds, and you shared a groan at the feeling.
“Please,” you begged, tugging at the buttons on his shirt until the top of his chest was exposed. “Please, Jay.” You knew how much he loved when you begged him, and it had the reaction you knew it would, which was a quick thrust of his hips until he was buried deep within you.
JJ groaned loudly, knowing damn well how massive this house was and that there was no way anyone would be able to hear you. “Fuck,” he grunted, grabbing your hip with one hand while his other squeezes at your chest. His thumb and index finger pinch and tug at your nipple until it’s impossibly tight, then he leans down and does the same thing to the other, but this time with his lips and tongue.
You jolt and kick the lower cabinet by accident, but neither of you care about the loud noise you just made as you let the lust take over. “Oh, my God,” you gasp, locking your legs around his waist as he begins to fuck into you. “Fuck.”
JJ sucked in a breath through his teeth as your walls tightly gripped him, inviting him in deeper and deeper with every thrust of his hips. You felt so good, and he knew that, which is why he couldn’t wait until he got you back to your house after the party to do this. He probably would’ve come in his pants if he had to wait that long.
With that being said, there is no way he is lasting long now. Not with the way you clung onto him as he fucked you, and the way your saliva coated chest brushed against his.
You were already a moaning mess as he trailed his hand down and began rubbing circles onto your clit, and the new pressure only made you louder. JJ would proudly admit if you asked him that he loved the way you sounded for him, and loved how you weren’t afraid to get vocal at times like this.
“Jesus, Jay,” you whimpered, biting down on your puffy lip that was swollen from his harsh kisses. You gripped the edge of the counter tightly with one hand, the other tangling in his blond hair as he fucked you hard and fast. Usually he liked to take his time with you and really worship your body for as long as he could, but this had to be quicker than normal for obvious reasons.
“I know,” he grunted, pinching and pulling at your clit as he worked you open. He watched as he became more and more coated in your arousal with each thrust, and his jaw locked when you tilted your head back and pressed your chest against his. You looked so fucked out and hot, he was still in shock that he somehow managed to get you to agree to be his. “I know.”
“Fuck,” you nearly, cried, pressing your heels against his lower back and letting the sides of your thighs rest on the cool marble of the counter. It gave him the best view of your dripping core and it took a lot out of JJ to not come right then and there.
“Fuck, Y/n,” he rasped, fucking into you even harder than before, determined to make you come first. “Tell me you’re close, baby.”
You whimper, lifting your head and kissing him deeply. “I’m close, Jay,”
“Thank fuck,” he huffed, earning a soft laugh from you as you tensed up. “Come for me, baby. Come on me.”
“Oh, fuck,” you moaned loudly, bracing yourself on shaky arms as you coated his cock in your release. “Fuck…fuck.”
The added wetness and the way you were still clenching around him was all JJ needed as he came deep within your throbbing and pulsing walls, a deep grunt leaving the back of his throat. “God, Y/n,” he breathed out as he stilled inside you, watching with squinted eyes as you push yourself up and grin at him. “The things you do to me.”
You laugh as he leans down to kiss the tops of your breasts before pulling your dress back up. “I don’t want to go back downstairs now,” you blushed under his intense gaze, taking it upon yourself to button his shirt back up. “That was too good.”
It was always good with him, and he knew that, which is why he strived to give it to you better each time. “We could always just sneak out a window, steal The Twinkie and go back to your place,” he suggested as he slowly pulled out of you.
You watched with parted lips as he grabbed your panties and shoved them into his pocket, then he zipped his pants up with a smirk. “But that pie Ward brought out looked really good,” you pouted and JJ laughed, walking back over to you and tugging at your lip.
“Fine, we’ll stay for pie,” he stated, lifting you off the counter. He leaned down to press a final kiss to your mouth, smiling at you when he pulled away and took your hand in his. “Then I’m taking you home.”
#jj x reader#jj maybank smut#jj obx#jj maybank#jj maybank x reader#jj x y/n#outer banks x reader#obx#rudy pankow#jj x you#jj maybank imagine#obx fic#obx fanfiction#obx smut#jj smut#outer banks#outer banks smut#outer banks fanfiction#outer banks imagine#outer banks jj#jj outer banks
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Hii, i was wondering if you were able to write something for hansumfella (tyler) ? I was thinking he talks about him having a girlfriend but no body believes him until he finally brings her into a stream and everyone is amazed because they thought he was joking !! but anything works haven’t rlly seen hansumfella content !! 😅😅
YES!!!!!! Hope this is alright! It’s my first hansumfella fic so I’m super new at this….
Hansumfella || Stream Surprise
You and Tyler had been openly dating for several months, thoroughly enjoying the simplicity and joy your relationship brought into your lives. However, as Tyler's online alter ego, HansumFella, began to skyrocket in popularity, it became clear that managing your private and public lives would need some recalibration. Out of mutual concern for privacy and the unpredictable nature of internet fame, you both agreed it would be best to keep your relationship out of the public eye for the time being.
During one of his lively Roblox streams—a session filled with laughter and playful banter—Tyler unexpectedly let a secret slip, a revelation that even surprised him.
“And yeah, for those wondering why I’ve been a bit off-schedule lately, I’ve been spending some time with my amazing girlfriend,” he mentioned casually, taking a sip of water as the chat erupted into a frenzy.
“You what now, Tyler?!” one viewer exclaimed, their message quickly engulfed by a wave of shocked and curious reactions.
“HE HAS A GF?!”
“NOOOO 😭”
“GIRLFRIEND REVEAL”
“I knew it Ong”
“Proof or it didn’t happen.”
Despite the disbelief, Tyler merely chuckled and steered the conversation back to his gaming strategy, his relaxed demeanor doing little to stop the onslaught of comments.
“Alright chat, calm down I didn’t even say anything! You’re just imagining it! You’re gaslighting yourself. Let’s focus back to absolutely destroying children in best dressed” He jests in his usual dry sense of humor.
In the weeks that followed, each stream dedicated a few minutes to viewers probing for more details about you. Tyler kept his answers vague, strategically revealing just enough to maintain interest without confirming anything definitive.
“What does she look like?”
“Favorite thing about her?”
“I still think he’s lying.”
“Well she looks absolutely gorgeous. Absolute smoke show.” He playfully remarks before continuing.
“Favorite thing about her? Oo that’s a hard one, there’s so much to love. I’ll say sense of humor.”
The curiosity and incessant questioning from his fanbase eventually led Tyler to plan a significant reveal. On a crisp summer evening, his usual streaming time, Tyler adjusted his webcam to capture more than just his usual gaming setup.
“Alright, everyone,” Tyler announced as he started his stream, “tonight is a special night. You've all been incredibly patient—or incredibly nosy,” he joked with a wink at the camera. “I think it's time you meet someone very special to me.”
He reached out and extended a hand off-camera. After a brief moment, another hand appeared, and you stepped into view, your smile bright yet slightly shy as you waved to the camera.
“Hello stream! Is that what I call them?” You ask, a little overwhelmed with the situation
“You can call them whatever you like, babe.” He chuckles, pulling you to sit down beside him.
The chat paused for a split second before erupting.
“OMHH SHES REAL?!”
“She’s so beautiful!!”
“HE WASN’T LYING 💀”
“Literally how did he land her?”
“She’s ours now”
Tyler’s grin widened as he read the comments aloud, his arm comfortably encircling you as you sat comfortably on his lap.
“Everyone, this is Y/N. She’s the reason I’ve been so distracted, so you can blame her for the lack of content.” He jests, earning a playful eye roll from you.
The stream proceeded exceptionally well. You were a natural, laughing and engaging with the chat as if you’d had been a part of the community for years. Tyler felt a mix of pride and relief; not only did his audience adore you, but him as well.
A few weeks after your debut on his stream, Tyler decided it was time to make your relationship Instagram official. He chose a candid photo of you two together, taken during a sunset hike. Both laughing, bathed in the golden hour light, capturing a beautiful moment.
Tyler uploaded the photo with the caption that simply read, “Mine ;)” and tagged you.
The post received thousands of likes and comments in no time. Fans and friends filled the comments section with hearts, congratulatory messages, and more than a few playful jabs at having doubted him in the first place.
Tyler leaned back, watching the notifications pop up one after another, you sitting beside him, head resting on his shoulder.
“Was it worth the wait?” Tyler asked, his voice a soft murmur.
“Definitely worth it,” you replied, squeezing his hand.
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woe, Reverse AU angst be upon ye (not necessarily a request, just a thought i had, but if anything strikes feel free to go ham :3 i also like to think about this with the og universe because i love feeling emotional pain 🧘🏾)
but instead of the reader having a classified file for themselves (& having it for sale), there are videotapes (or maybe different colored pendrives? CDs work too, i guess!!) scattered across the abandoned offices, and at first Sebastian isn't sure what to do with them, but then he meets p.ai.nter and they recognize those immediately, questioning why Sebastian is carrying that stuff with him in a concerned tone, and Sebastian just stares at the computer like, "??? okay, what's up with it?"
p.ai.nter is hesitant to show him what those hide at first, but eventually agrees to let him watch, then warns him that he is not going to like any second of it
Sebastian gets comfortable in front of the screen but is only greeted with an extremely heartbreaking scene– it's (now an experiment) reader visibly shaking as they stare in horror at their new body, unable to speak in any way while sobbing and whimpering, hugging themselves (or maybe their tail? guess it depends on the way readers want to look) and wondering what they had done to deserve this outcome, to be stripped of their humanity
now i personally like to think that the reader struggling to speak is something that comes with their body being altered, like everything is big so they're not used to any of it so really all they can do is cry and struggle to say a coherent sentence because it sounds like a garbled mess, but that is also me wanting to add salt to the wound because this is supposed to be sad ooooo ⚡⚡
anyway, at the end of it all (cause there was more than one video, a whole documentary on reader and the experiments done on them), Sebastian is left feeling too many emotions and he doesn't even know when he started crying but he is (since the reader he knows now is different from the one he just saw in the videos but deep down it hurts so much because that is the same person in different years of their life) and p.ai.nter isn't sure how to comfort him so they keep apologizing till Sebastian finally chooses to leave
next time he stops by reader's shop he can't even bring himself to stare at them properly because he's afraid he'll start bawling his eyes out, meanwhile, reader is just staring at him like ":3? no snarky comments or banter today wow what happened to him" unaware that he has seen The Horrors
that's all thanks for coming to my tedtalk
Authors Note: This is inspired by this request but not 1:1 written like it. This is pure angst and some gore. READ AT OWN RISK.
Tags: GORE, Angst, Reversed AU, mentions of syringes, drugs and operations.
Words: 2,7k
The sound of a click filled the room, followed by the small red light blinking on the video camera, indicating it was recording. Sebastian glanced at you with irritation as you held the camera—a little relic you'd scavenged from a deeper part of the facility—not too long ago. He shoved his hands deeper into the pockets of the leather jacket you had once sold him.
"And we are live!~ Say hello to the viewers, Seb!" you teased, shoving the camera playfully in his face. He immediately pushed it away with his hand, his scowl deepening.
"I get it, I get it," he grumbled, pointing at the camera with a mock glare. "You found a new toy. Now what? You planning to make a movie or something?"
You shot him a sharp look, the room growing colder as if you were subtly irritated by his comment. Sebastian could sense he'd hit a nerve, a rare feat considering your usual carefree attitude. But then, unexpectedly, you burst out laughing, clutching your stomach and flashing him the signature grin that always greeted him when he came to your shop.
"I’ve already starred in plenty,” you replied cryptically, your words hanging in the air with an eerie undertone. Sebastian opened his mouth to ask what you meant, but you cut him off with another sly comment. “Maybe you’re the next big star, Solace.”
After leaving your shop, Sebastian wandered through the halls of the Hadal Blackside facility, the encounter with you replaying in his mind. He’d grown to enjoy your company—your banter, your teasing, the way you challenged him. But today, something about your behavior felt off. Beneath the jokes and sarcasm, there was something else—something he couldn’t quite put his finger on. And that unsettled him like an itch he couldn’t scratch.
How could he be in a relationship with someone so different, so complex? You were like a puzzle with missing pieces, a riddle that refused to be solved. The more he thought about it, the more it nagged at him. His legs carried him on autopilot through the winding corridors, his mind consumed by thoughts of you.
It wasn’t until he found himself in the office segment of the building that he realized he’d been walking without really paying attention. His hand hovered over the keycard reader, and it struck him that he hadn’t even looked for the blue plastic card he needed to get through the next door. The desk was a mess of papers, ink, and tapes.
His eyes fell on an old, unlabeled tape, the kind they'd used for surveillance back in the day. Scrawled on it in red ink was a series of numbers: *Z-13.* The sight of it piqued his curiosity, a nagging feeling that it was significant. Without thinking, he slipped it into his pocket. He’d find a way to watch it later.
Sebastian rummaged through countless drawers, lockers, and cabinets, searching for the keycard, but instead, he kept finding more of those mysterious tapes. Each one seemed older than the last, covered in dust and marked with strange codes.
His practical side told him he should probably look through all of them, not just the one he had picked up. So, he gathered them into a makeshift box he'd found lying around and continued his search for the keycard, all the while wondering what secrets these tapes might hold—and what they had to do with you. He know the Name Z-13 was related to you.
If there was anything he knew for sure, it was that you were full of surprises. And maybe, just maybe, these tapes would help him understand you a little better.
By pure coincidence, Sebastian ran into P.AI.nter a while later as he continued through the seemingly endless corridors of the facility, taking casual steps despite the weight of the wonky box filled with random tapes he was carrying. The AI's sketched face flickered to life, its eyes narrowing with a curious gaze. "Quite the haul today, Sebastian," it remarked, its voice tinged with artificial cheerfulness. "Planning to deliver all of that to our trusty shopkeeper?"
Sebastian grunted in response, setting the box down on the floor with a thud. He raised his hands above his head, stretching to relieve the ache that had settled in his shoulders from lugging the heavy box around. "Can you play them?" he asked, his voice a mix of curiosity and exhaustion. It was a simple question, and he knew the answer even as he asked it—of course P.AI.nter could play a few tapes.
But as soon as the question left his lips, the room fell into an uneasy silence. P.AI.nter’s usual cheerful demeanor seemed to shift, its sketched form glitching for a moment as if processing something more than just data. The AI stared at Sebastian and the tapes, an uncharacteristic hesitation creeping into its expression.
"It's just a tape, Sebastian," P.AI.nter finally replied, its voice flat, devoid of its usual light-heartedness. There was something in the way it spoke—something guarded, almost cautious—that only fueled Sebastian's curiosity further. The AI’s reluctance was like gasoline on a fire.
“A tape I want to watch,” Sebastian shot back, his patience wearing thin. He was tired of the evasiveness, the constant roadblocks whenever he sought answers. He moved with purpose, selecting one of the tapes and sliding it into the nearest recorder, right next to P.AI.nter’s screen.
“I have to warn you, Sebastian,” P.AI.nter said, its tone shifting to something closer to pleading. The air between them grew heavy, the tension thickening as the tape began to whirl in the machine. Sebastian paused, the gravity of the AI's words weighing on him.
"You won’t like any second of it," P.AI.nter added, its voice barely more than a whisper. There was a finality in its tone, a sense of foreboding that hung in the air like a storm about to break. The familiar face of his AI friend got replaced by some white noise and then a black screen.
Sebastian’s heart pounded in his chest as he watched the screen flicker to life, unsure of what he was about to see but certain of one thing: whatever was on these tapes, it was something the facility—and P.AI.nter—wanted to keep hidden.
“Hellooo! I'm one of the new researchers here at the Hadal Blackside. I'm recording Tape Nr. XXXX in Containment Cell XXXX. Wish me luck!”
Sebastian watched as a cheerful person appeared on the screen, holding a camera up to their face. Excitement radiated from their eyes, and despite the poor quality of the footage, their energy was infectious. Some of the information on the screen glitched out, redacting key details as if the tape had deliberately scrambled those moments, keeping certain things obscured.
The person on the screen shifted their stance, and the camera followed their movement. “This is a video for my friend who was super excited to hear about my job. I totally stole the camera for this, so shhh, we can't get caught,” they whispered conspiratorially, a playful grin spreading across their face. There was something unsettling about their carefree demeanor, yet Sebastian couldn't help but feel a small flicker of amusement. The tape felt like a low-quality YouTube vlog, reminiscent of simpler times, with this familiar-looking worker goofing off for the amusement of a friend.
“They told me this is super secret stuff,” the voice continued, the lens panning around the containment cell. “But I just have to show you this.”
The video abruptly cut to another segment, the view shifting to reveal a massive anglerfish-like entity lurking behind an enormous glass wall. The waters it swam in were inky black, like thick oil, giving the creature an unsettling and eerie aura as it moved in the dark liquid.
“Isn't it cool?” the person behind the camera asked with an almost childlike wonder, pressing their flat hand against the glass. “They’re hiding this here! They do some voodoo fish shit in this facility. Even the human centipede would turn pale in envy.”
Sebastian froze as he watched the footage. The creature behind the glass was terrifying—a monstrous anglerfish, its grotesque form barely discernible in the murky waters. It was an unsettling sight, made even more disturbing by the fact that this reckless researcher was standing mere inches from one of the most dangerous entities imaginable, their tone light and casual as if they were commenting on the weather.
A chill ran down Sebastian’s spine as he continued to watch the video, his breath caught in his throat. The footage shifted again, but the image of the monstrous fish remained burned into his mind. His gut twisted with unease. What was this person thinking, standing so close to something so deadly? And why did they seem so familiar?
As the old tape continued to play, the weight of the discovery settled on Sebastian’s shoulders like a heavy boulder. Whatever secrets were buried in these tapes, he was certain they weren’t meant to be uncovered—especially not by him. Yet here he was, staring at a reality that seemed more and more like a nightmare. The things he saw so far in the blackside were not as terrifying as this giant monster that rested behind that glass wall.
The tape ended abruptly, and for a moment, there was only silence. Sebastian’s hands trembled as he reached down to turn the cassette over, the worn edges rough against his fingertips. He knew there were at least four more tapes waiting in the box at his feet, each one a potential gateway to another nightmare. His breath caught in his throat, a cold sweat forming on his brow. Still, his curiosity and a gnawing need for answers compelled him to continue.
With a shaky breath, he pressed the tape back into the player, flipping it to the other side. The screen flickered to life again, this time showing a cold, sterile operating room. Several figures in hazmat suits moved with practiced precision, their faces obscured by masks and goggles. The room was pristine, a stark contrast to the horror Sebastian knew was about to unfold.
“This is Experiment Nr. XXXX,” a calm, clinical voice narrated. “And our newest trial patient, Z-13, who volunteered for their transformation.”
Sebastian’s eyes widened as he recognized the person strapped to the operating chair—the same person from the earlier footage. They were bound tightly, their limbs secured as though they were a dangerous criminal. There was no mistaking the fear and confusion in their eyes, even through the drug-induced haze.
“Z-13 was administered XXXX, XXXX, and XXXX 20 minutes prior to the start of this procedure,” the voice continued with an unsettling detachment. “Their pupils are dilated, and the patient has entered a state of delirium, necessary for the next phase of the experiment.”
The camera zoomed in on the bound figure, their eyes bloodshot and unnaturally wide, darting around the room in a frantic, unfocused search for something familiar. Sebastian felt his stomach churn with a sickening realization—this was no volunteer. This was a person trapped, forced into an unimaginable horror. The idea of volunteering was just another lie, a thin veneer over a darker truth.
Sebastian’s fingers dug into his knees as he watched, his body tense with dread. He knew what was coming next, but the tape did not shy away from the gruesome details. The hours that followed were a blur of pain and suffering, each tape more harrowing than the last. Scenes of torn flesh and oily blood filled the screen, detached limbs falling to the sterile floor with sickening thuds. Each cut, each scream was more unbearable than the last. And those eyes—those haunted, slowly awakening eyes—followed Sebastian throughout each frame, pleading silently for mercy.
With each passing minute, it became painfully clear that the drugs were losing its effectiveness and the person that was tied to the chair gained the ability to feel every single thing that happened there. The delirium ended and the terror began.
The scream tore through the speakers with such intensity that Sebastian flinched. It wasn’t just a scream—it was a raw, visceral sound, a guttural cry filled with a mix of agony, fear, and desperation. It was a sound so primal that it clawed its way into his very bones, settling there with an uncomfortable weight. It was the worst thing he had heard in ages. Every nerve in his body screamed in empathy for the poor soul on the screen, the person whose existence had been reduced to nothing but a vessel for pain.
“Silence them,” a cold, emotionless voice commanded from off-screen.
Almost immediately, a set of cruel, metal clamps were forcefully shoved into the patient's mouth, prying it open with a brutality that made Sebastian wince. These were the kind of instruments used for people with severe jaw fractures, designed to immobilize and inflict pain to prevent further injury. But here, they were used as a tool of torture, a means to quiet the suffering that had become too loud for the facility’s sterile walls. The rough, unyielding metal dug into their flesh, tearing into the soft tissue of their mouth, blood trickling down their chin. The sight was gruesome, and Sebastian could feel his stomach twist with disgust.
The person’s screams were abruptly cut off, replaced by a wet, choking gurgle. They were left to suffer in silence, their jaw now clamped shut, the metal rods cruelly keeping it from moving even a fraction. Tears streamed down their face, their eyes wide with terror and pain, every muscle in their body taut with agony.
And just when Sebastian thought it couldn’t possibly get any worse, the camera shifted. The surgeon, clad in a sterile suit that seemed to mock the very concept of humanity, moved over the patient's eyes. Those eyes—once filled with life, now wide with shock, pain, and a frantic, animalistic fear—darted around in sheer terror. They were crying frantically, tears mingling with the blood on their face.
“We will now begin our final part,” the disembodied voice continued with a chilling detachment. “Removal of the natural human eyes to replace them with XXXX using XXXX and XXXX. The expected results will lead to an ability to see underwater.”
Sebastian’s breath caught in his throat as he watched a gloved hand reach for a long, thin needle, the metal glinting ominously under the harsh, fluorescent lights. The needle was positioned directly over the patient's eye, the sharp tip hovering just above the delicate orb. Their wide, terrified gaze seemed to plead with the unseen surgeons, with the camera, with anyone who might be watching—to stop, to help, to do something.
But there was no help. There was no mercy.
The screen flickered for a moment, and then, mercifully, the tape cut to black. The room was plunged into darkness, the only sound the low hum of the equipment around him. Sebastian sat frozen, his heart pounding in his chest, his mind racing with the horrific images he had just witnessed. His hands were clenched so tightly that his knuckles were white, the tension radiating through his entire body.
He was left alone in the darkness, his thoughts a chaotic whirlwind. The horror of what he had seen, of what had been done to someone who had likely never asked for any of this, crashed over him.
Then P.AI.nters face greeted him on the screen.
“They first drugged them, then they put in a row of ocean animal dna into their body.”
He was pointing out the steps that the surgeons did in the tape.
“They cut off their fingers, waiting for them to grow back. They took of the part from the knees to the feet…and then they noticed that it wasn't enough.”
Sebastian raised his hands, to put them over his ears.
“They lost both their healthy legs. Next was their ears, they cut it off. And then…they silenced them by closing their jaw.”
He could still hear P.AI.nter.
“And then they lost their eyes. The transformation from the human self to…the thing they are now…took 7 weeks. They attached and deattached plenty of stuff on them.”
For a moment he felt the urge to shut P.AI.nter off for good.
“Our shopkeeper went through much, don't you think?”
A loud sound filled the room and then there was darkness.
#sebastian solace#sebastian solace x reader#sebastian solace x you#sebastian solace fanfic#roblox pressure#pressure#tw:gore#tw:syringe
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I Can’t Be Your Friend.
Sneak Peek: Eddie and you do something that alters the state of your friendship. You realize that being his friend hurts too much now. **The events of season 4 did NOT happen** Bold are Eddie’s thoughts; Italics are reader’s thoughts.
Eddie Munson x Fem Reader
Angst/Fluff/implied Smut
Word count: 2473
REQUESTS ARE OPEN - not edited - please be kind. Feedback is welcome if it's constructive!
Warnings: My blog is 18+, minors DNI, implied smut, drug use (marijuana), explicit language, idiots in love, Steve’s absent parents, mention of underage drinking. Let me know if I missed any!
That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.
Tonight was going to be amazing! Steve had invited everyone over for a summer kickoff party, there would be pizza, swimming, beer, and good company. Robin and you had gotten to Steve’s early to help set things up, pizzas were on the way, and you were just waiting for everyone to show up now.
First to arrive was Nancy, she had driven over with Mike, Lucas, Max, and Dustin. They had come bounding in with arms full of chips and soda, piling them recklessly on the coffee table. The younger kids were arguing about who got the bathroom first to change.
You couldn’t help but laugh and roll your eyes as you made your way to the door, letting in the next group. You had assumed it would be Johnathan, Argyle, and the rest of the kids, but instead, Eddie was standing in the doorway.
“Hey Eds!” You smiled.
“Hey! How’s my best girl?” Eddie pulled you into his arms and lifted you slightly as he spun you around. “I’ve missed you dude.”
“I’m good Eds. I’ve missed you too!” Your heart clenched slightly as he placed you back on your feet.
Your relationship with Eddie had always been like this. You were best friends, but sometimes, things were done or said that seemed a bit more than friendly. You’d stayed more nights with Eddie this last year than you did in your own home. Robin had pestered you about the status of your relationship with him to which you’d always reply; “We’re just friends, he doesn’t see me that way”.
“So, I know the kids are here, but I brought a little something special for us. I figured we could go to the van, take a few hits then come back in.” Eddie said wagging a joint in front of you.
“Eddie!” You hissed, covering the joint. “You can’t just pull that out. But yes, give me fifteen minutes.”
Eddie tucked the joint back into his jacket pocket and watched as you made your way over to Steve, Nancy, and Robin. Robin gave you a knowing look and you brushed her off. You were all catching up for a bit, laughing at the nonsense the kids were getting up to. Eddie was the one to open the door for Jonathan, Argyle, El, and Will. As they all walked in, Eddie came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist and rested his chin on your head.
“You ready?” Eddie whispered.
You nodded and let him lead you outside to his van. Climbing in the back, you made yourself comfortable amongst the pile of blankets and pillows, all the while, Eddie lit the joint and placed it to his lips. After a few quick puffs and one long drag, Eddie passed it to you. The two of you passed the joint back and forth for a bit before it was nearly gone.
“Do you want the last hit?” Eddie asked.
“Nah it’s cool, you take it.” You leaned your head back.
“We could always share it.” Eddie said with a sly smirk.
“Okay.” You blushed.
Eddie took a long drag, holding it in as he moved towards you. He brought his lips to yours, only separated by a few millimeters. Your lips parted in a gasp, and he blew the smoke into your mouth. You inhaled sharply, allowing the smoke in. Your mind felt hazy, and you were starting to wonder if it was the weed or the lack of space between Eddie and you. Eddie met your eyes and pulled back slightly, clearing his throat.
What the hell was happening?
The two of you made your way back into the house and took turns changing into your bathing suits. You rushed outside and went to sit on the steps of the pool with Robin and Nancy. Each of whom gave you a pointed look.
Eddie made a stop in the kitchen to grab you a coke and an orange soda for himself, he then made his way outside. He sat the two cans in front of where you were sitting with the girls, the next thing you knew he was jumping into the pool, splashing the three of you, eliciting screeches from you three.
He surfaced and swam over to you, settling himself between your legs which were dangling off the step. His chest pressed against yours as he reached behind you to grab his soda. Your breath was caught in your throat.
Had he always been this beautiful?
Who were you kidding. Of course he had.
The night went on like this. The kids swimming, playing a ridiculous game of Marco-Polo, Steve grilling hamburgers and hotdogs, Eddie treating you like far more than a friend.
Now you were all crammed in Steve’s living room, some movie playing in the background. You couldn’t remember the name of it because you were far too distracted. When you had come into the living room, all the good seats had been taken, and instead of letting you sit on the floor, Eddie had pulled you into his lap and wrapped his arms around your middle.
You had been sitting like this for about half an hour before he made the suggestion.
“Do you want to go back to my place?”
This typically wouldn’t have sounded like a line, but given everything that had occurred today, you couldn’t help but feel like his words held deeper meaning.
“Okay.”
He led you into the trailer, just like any other time you’d been here, only this time there was a tension hanging over you.
More like sexual tension.
Jesus, get a hold of yourself.
Entering Eddie’s room brought forth a wave of anticipation, you couldn’t help but feel like something was about to happen. Eddie walked over to you and handed you one of his Iron Maiden shirts and a pair of his boxers.
It’s now or never.
You locked your eyes on Eddie’s as you slowly removed your tank top and shorts, leaving you clad in only your bathing suit. Eddie took a sharp breath and pulled his shirt over his head. Up until now things felt as though they’d been moving in slow motion, then all of a sudden things switched to fast forward.
Eddie lunged towards you and locked his lips onto your own, your hands finding his curls, his finding the ties to your swimsuit. His lips tasted like orange soda and nicotine, he was addicting, and you knew you’d never be able to give this up.
Eddie woke up and glanced over to see your naked form curled up in his bed. He couldn’t believe it, the two of you had taken that leap, this would change everything between you.
This could change everything.
I can’t afford to lose her.
You stirred awake, noticing your lack of clothing, and taking note of the discarded clothing on the floor.
So that really did happen.
This could change everything!
“Hey.” Eddie said quietly.
“Hey.” You blushed.
You sat up holding the sheet to your chest and turning to meet Eddie’s gaze. Something was off about his expression, he seemed somber, and you were terrified to find out why.
“So, uh…” Eddie turned, breaking eye contact. “We should just forget this ever happened; you know. So, it doesn’t fuck up our friendship.”
Please say you don’t want to forget about it.
Of course he doesn’t want me.
“Oh, uh, yeah. I guess you’re right.”
Of course she doesn’t want me.
You stood and quickly began pulling your clothes on and gathering your things. There was this loud ringing in your ears and you’re sure Edie was calling your name, but all you knew was you needed to get out of there.
You were halfway home before the ringing stopped.
How could you be so stupid.
Then the tears started. Not only had your heart been broken by the man you loved, but you also lost the one person you’d want to hold you while you cried.
“Dude what is up with you? You’ve been super weird since Steve’s summer kick-off party.” Robin pestered.
“Yeah she’s right, plus Eddie’s been extra bitchy, which usually only happens when you haven’t seen one another in a while. I thought for sure you guys were gonna hookup that night.” Steve ranted.
Your face turned a bright shade of red and you let your gaze fall to your lap. You knew you weren’t exactly being discreet with your avoidance of Eddie, but you didn’t’ think they’d call you out directly.
“Holy shit! You two had sex!” Robin shouted, smacking you on the arm.
“Ow! Yes, we did. And it ruined everything. The next morning, he suggested we just forget it ever happened.”
“What? No way, Eddie’s head over heels for you. What happened?” Steve asked.
You explained to Steve and Robin the events of the night and they both concluded that it made no sense. They were both convinced Eddie was in love with you.
This was when Steve and Robin came up with their plan. They would get you and Eddie together before summer ended.
“Steve, this isn’t working. She is declining every invite to hangout; she has gone as far as driving over and leaving if she sees the van, and even calling everyone to be sure if Eddie was invited.” Robin said throwing herself on the couch in defeat.
“That’s it! We will invite her over for a movie night, just the three of us. Then after she’s here, you go to the other room and call Eddie and invite him over. That way nobody will be able to tell her that he’s invited because he wasn’t.” Steve explained.
“Hey guys!” You called entering Steve’s house.
“Hey! How have you been? We haven’t seen you in a while.” Robin pulled you into a hug.
“Sorry about that, I just…I can’t bring myself to face him yet. I’ll get over it, I just need time.” You said.
Steve came in, greeting you and pulling you to the living room to help him pick a movie. He threw a wink over his shoulder to Robin. She rolled her eyes and made her way to Steve’s dad’s office ready to make the call. When she came to the living room she played it off as a trip to the bathroom.
Things were going well, they felt like old times, save for the hole in your chest in the shape of one, Eddie Munson.
Speaking of which.
“Hey guys!” Eddie greeted, entering the house.
“Guys, what the hell.” You said threw gritted teeth.
They both looked at you with guilty eyes. You shook your head and told them you needed to go. Grabbing your bag you went for the door. It took everything in you to not look at him.
“Hey, where are you going?” Eddie called after you, following you outside. “I haven’t seen you in weeks. You’re dodging my calls, your canceling plans, you’re literally leaving as I showed up to hang out.”
“Eddie, I can’t do this right now. I need to go.”
“So what? That’s it?” He had never sounded so defeated.
“Eddie, I…”
“Is this because of that night? C’mon you’re my best friend, you’re just gonna throw that all away?” He grasped your hand in his own.
“That’s the problem Eddie, I can’t be your friend anymore. Everything is different now.” You shook your head, pulled your hand from his grasp, and took off walking back home.
Eddie walked back into the house and immediately receive a slap to the back of the head from Robin. She and Steve proceeded to explain to Eddie how he had messed the whole thing up and how him suggesting you just “forget it ever happened” had led you to believe that he didn’t care about you.
Initially he didn’t believe them that you had feelings for him, but after they literally spelled it out for him, he realized what an idiot he had been.
“I’m gonna need your help.”
The plan had been a pretty difficult one, Eddie needed Robin and Steve to convince you to come over again for an end of summer bash and after the last time, he was sure you’d say no.
Robin had explained to you that after your conversation with Eddie, that he definitely wouldn’t be coming. She told you that she asked him, and he had declined. It was then that you agreed, but not without a pang of guilt filling your chest. You couldn’t stand the thought of hurting Eddie. The look on his face when you told him you couldn’t be his friend had been haunting you.
The day came and you drove over to Steve’s, shocked that the only car in the driveway had been his. You parked and let yourself in.
“Steve? Where is everyone?”
“Hey! I’m in my room, and they’re on their way I figured you could come early so I could see how you were doing.” Steve said.
You walked into his room and noticed he was seemingly searching for something, he was scrambling around his room, swiftly moving to his dresser as you made yourself comfortable on his bed. You looked over at him just in time to see a mess of curls enter and Steve pulling the door closed. You heard the lock click and the distinct sound of a chair being pushed against the knob.
“What the hell is this?”
“I needed to find a way to talk to you and you’ve been avoiding me.”
“Eddie, let me out.”
“Not until we talk. Look I fucked up that night, I suggested that we forget about it and that was stupid.” He exclaimed.
“Eds, look, I just need time…these feelings will go away eventually. I don’t want to lose you as a friend, but how am I supposed to be around you when I’ve tasted your kiss and will never get to experience that again?”
“I don’t want your feelings to go away. Truth is, I only suggested it because I thought there was no way you could love me back.” Eddie explained.
“You love me?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Eddie pulled you into a gentle kiss, wrapping his arms around your waist. You let your fingers get tangled in his hair. There were whispered apologies between kisses and you two only broke apart when the two of you needed air.
“How would you like to go get some dinner?” Eddie asked.
“I would love that!” You replied.
With that, Eddie walked over to the bedroom door and began knocking, shouting to Steve that he was safe to let you guys out. His knocks sped up the longer it took for Steve to release you both.
“Harrington, hurry up! I gotta take my girlfriend on our first date!”
#eddie munson#stranger things#eddie munson stranger things#corroded coffin#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson fic#eddie munson fanfic#stranger things 4#eddie munson angst#eddie munson au#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson x female character#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson angst blurb#sstranger things blurb#stranger things imagine#stranger things x you#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things fic#mechanic!eddie#mechanic!eddie x reader#mechanic!eddie x y/n#dad!eddie munson#dad!eddie munson x mom!reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson fluff
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Selfish
“Why are you arranging to go out with the boys? You know we’re going up to help my parents with redecorating this weekend!” Lucy complained, standing straight up and looking down at Ryan, laid out on the couch.
“We’re doing what?” Ryan asked, completely perplexed. “We were there last weekend!”
“Yeah, and I told my dad you’d give him a hand with the wallpapering this next weekend as well,” Lucy continued in her whining tone.
“Their entire lounge?” Ryan shot back. “Nobody told me!”
“Well…” Lucy mumbled, suddenly realising that Ryan was right. “I’m telling you now.”
Ryan huffed in frustration. He hadn’t had a night out with the boys in months. He’d thought, when he married Lucy, that he was setting himself up for a good life. She didn’t want kids, she wasn’t crazy about him visiting the gym all the time and she was a fully qualified chef! However, two years in and Ryan had never had so little time for himself, endlessly fixing up their apartment just as Lucy wanted it, then constantly heading out to see her parents; always being signed up for some tedious maintenance tasks now that Lucy’s dad was getting on a bit and living off his retirement income. “Fine,” he sighed, deleting his planned message to the group chat with the boys. “I guess I can see my friends when I’ve got a couple of weeks off next month.”
“Oh, yes!” Lucy nodded, making Ryan instantly regret reminding her about his time off. The cogs in her head clearly rolling into action, imagining all of the jobs he could get done in that time.
“Ryan!” cheered his buddies a full nine weeks later, amazed that he had actually made it out. “We haven’t seen you in ages!”
“I’m only here for one of two drinks. I dropped Lucy off in town to do some shopping,” he explained to them, not wanting to get their hopes up.
“You’re not coming to the club?” Adam asked, raising his eyebrows in surprise after giving him the biggest hug.
“No… no. I wish I could, but…” he grumbled, considering the best way to explain how much Lucy was monopolising his time; how frustrating and demanding she had become since they got married. . “...I’ve got commitments,” he simply stated, deciding not to poison his time with his friends by complaining about the person who had kept him away from them for so long.
“Don’t worry about it, buddy,” Jack jumped in, filling the silent void that was killing the mood. “Life happens.”
“Jack!” Ryan exclaimed, seeing his high school best friend and doing a slight double take. The guy had altered quite a bit since Ryan last saw him. Where had that double chin come from? How was he filling that shirt with all that padding in his stomach? What the hell had happened? “How long has it been, buddy?”
“I saw you at Ginny and Fran’s house warming, about four months ago,” he answered. “I introduced you to my new girlfriend, Michelle.”
“Oh, yeah,” I remember, Ryan nodded, thinking back to how drunk Lucy had been that night, and how early they had had to leave. But Jack hadn’t looked so overweight back then. They’d tried out their friends’ new swimming pool. Jack had been one of the first ones in. He definitely wasn’t out of shape. Not like he appeared to be now.
As luck would have it, when the guys all went to grab seats, Ryan ended up next to Jack, right on the end of a long, rectangular table. Back in their high school days, the pair of them had been the best of friends, and that old rapport immediately came back every time they met; even after months of separation. Jack had always been the bad influence that Ryan’s parents had never approved of. He’d been banned from hanging out with the guy on multiple occasions when he was growing up and, even now, he still felt like he was doing something he shouldn’t, giggling away at the crude jokes that tumbled out of Jack’s mouth with ease.
“So, things are going well with Michelle?” Ryan asked, spotting that Jack had already referenced her several times in their conversation.
“Things are going great!” Jack beamed. He leaned in a little closer, clearly not wanting the other guys to hear. “We’ve even talked about getting married!”
At this, Ryan’s eyebrows flew up. “Married? After four months?” he whispered back, knowing that Jack didn’t want this broadcasting. He remembered how promiscuous his friend had been during his college days. If Ryan had been asked to pick any one of the guys here who was least likely to ever settle down, he would have chosen Jack without a second thought.
“I know!” Jack beamed, leaning back and placing his hands on the top of his stout little paunch, which jutted out into a proper shelf as they sat down. “I’m so ready for it though,” he smiled, seeming to rub his stomach mindlessly. “I’m actually really excited about the idea.”
Round and round Jack’s hands went, rubbing that tight ball of stomach fat, pulling Ryan’s gaze into it. “I’m happy for you,” he mumbled back.
Jack looked around, checking that no one else was listening in, then he turned himself a little more into Ryan, about to divulge even more private information. “Michelle’s super kinky!” he whispered.
Ryan chuckled and leaned in as well. His own sex life was so monotonous these days, he was actually quite ready to hear about someone else having a good time. “Oh yeah? She certainly looked pretty flexible when I met her that one time,” he grinned, settling into dirty ‘guy talk’ with enthusiasm.
“Oh, buddy!” Jack sighed, rolling his eyes and giving a huge exhale. “You would not believe it. She has me wrapped around her little finger. Absolutely anything she wants, I do for her.”
“That doesn’t sound too dissimilar to me and Lucy,” Ryan quipped, chuckling at his own joke.
“No, I’m not talking about boring shit, like decorating,” Jack shot back, having heard all about Ryan’s grumblings. “I’m talking about really kinky, submissive stuff.”
“Really?” Ryan smirked. “I never thought she’d be the dominant type.”
“No,” Jack agreed enthusiastically. “No one else knows. She hides it really well.”
Ryan had to admit that he was getting a little turned on. “So, what type of stuff does she make you do?” he asked next; his eyes twinkling with boyish interest, just as much as Jack’s were.
“All sorts,” Jack answered, his hands slipping onto his gut again. “When we started going out, I was still trying to act like the playboy I used to be. Michelle was having none of it. She’s put guys like me in their place before. Trust me, I’ve seen the pictures!” he smirked.”But her biggest turn on is making sure I overeat and get bigger.”
“Seriously?” Ryan asked, now understanding why Jack kept on holding his stomach. “I thought girls hated it when guys put on weight?”
“It’s an absolute fucking dream!” Jack replied, lowering his voice even further. Just the fact that he had sworn showed Ryan how turned on his friend was, simply by talking about it. “I get home and she’ll sit me in my gaming chair and set everything up for me. Then she brings me endless snacks and beers; a few sodas, cream cakes. Michelle won’t even let me get up. I do nothing around my apartment at all! No washing, no cleaning and certainly no cooking! She gets off on controlling my entire lifestyle when I’m at home. Then rewarding me for it.”
“Dude, that’s amazing!” Ryan had to agree, feeling surprisingly jealous. He’d been up until almost midnight last night, fixing a new shelf for Lucy’s candles, whilst his buddy Jack had been gaming, eating and getting pleasured the entire time.
“You see why I’m so keen to marry her now?” Jack joked back. “Can you believe it? I’m actually living out our dream that we used to talk about in high school.”
Ryan looked a little perplexed, trying to remember what they used to talk about ten years ago.
In turn, Jack seemed a little surprised that Ryan was struggling to recall. “You remember? Mr Hanson was such a bad gym teacher, we used to joke that we would just find some girls who liked fat guys and never have to put on a pair of itchy gym shorts again.”
“Oh, yeah!” Ryan chuckled. “That worked out well for me,” he sighed sarcastically. “I ended up marrying a professional chef, but I’m now ten pounds lighter than I was when we married.”
“Dude, there are other girls out there,” Jack went on enthusiastically. “Believe me! My eyes have been opened in these last few months! If you want the life that I’ve got…” he proclaimed, rubbing his stomach once more, “trust me, you can have it!”
Ryan nodded. No one else had dared to suggest he thought about a life beyond Lucy. Whenever he raised his concerns or annoyances about their marriage, people were keen to stamp them out, reminding him, in their accusatory tones, that marriage was all about compromising. Now, here was Jack, actively encouraging him to imagine being with someone else instead. It was the reason why Jack was, and always would be, Ryan’s very best friend.
Ryan looked at himself in the mirror a couple of weeks later. It was Sunday night. He should have been well rested, and yet he looked nothing but tired. The dirt under his fingernails from digging up Lucy’s parents’ garden all weekend was still visible in places, despite scrubbing for so long in the shower. His ribs were showing in his chest and, although he was built with plenty of muscle, he’d never looked so lanky and slim in his life. He thought of Jack and his life of pleasure and luxury. This… this tiredness and exhaustion was not what he wanted for himself. He looked almost ill.
Life had to change.
Ryan raised his cell phone to the mirror and took a picture of himself. This would be his lowest point, he decided with determination. From now on, things were going to change. He never wanted to see himself like this ever again.
“What’s all this?” Lucy complained, slipping into Ryan’s truck on their way to the supermarket. She held up several pieces of packaging, wrappers from fast food places and sugary snacks. “Is this what you’ve been eating when you’ve been in work this week?”
Ryan nodded without shame. “I feel like I’m too skinny. I’m trying to put on a few pounds.”
“Since when?” Lucy blasted back indignantly. “I’ve never told you you’re too skinny. I like the way you look.”
“I don’t,” Ryan shrugged. “I’ve never liked being skinny. I was always bigger than this growing up. In fact, I was actually quite chubby when I started high school.”
“Well, no. Sorry,” Lucy stated, without compromise. “I’m your wife, and I say no.”
Ryan looked at her in disbelief. “It’s my body,” he declared. “And I want to feel good about it.”
“I said no!” Lucy spat, brushing all the packaging into the footwell and sitting herself down. “Now, let’s talk about something else.”
Ryan got in, sat down and slammed the door shut, neither of them speaking for the entire ride.
‘Fastest ways to gain weight’ Ryan typed into the internet search that evening after Lucy had gone to bed. He quickly skipped through anything that dealt with muscle gains and focused solely on those that promoted increases in fat. He may have married Lucy, but she didn’t own him. In fact, she was the one who needed to learn that more than anyone. This was one ‘no’ that he wasn’t about to cave into.
“You’re looking well,” cried Ryan’s aunt as he stopped over to fix her leaking tap.
“Thanks,” he smiled back. “I feel quite well,” he agreed. “I’ve been trying to put some weight back on these last few weeks. I was starting to get far too skinny.”
“I was saying that to your mom, but she didn’t agree with me. You had gone dreadfully skinny.”
Ryan nodded in agreement. He had always been much more on his aunt’s wavelength than anyone else in his family. “I found some recipes online and I buy in these little calorie shakes that seem to work well on me. I’ve put on about 20lbs altogether,” he explained, raising his shirt briefly to show that his stomach was indeed a little thicker. “Lucy isn’t too pleased about it. But she’s never happy these days.”
“Well, you were never skinny growing up, were you?” his aunt nodded. “You always had a sweet tooth, I remember. You used to eat me out of house and home when you came over!”
“That’s why I’m so tall,” Ryan laughed. “I was always so well fed growing up.”
The pair of them laughed and Ryan packed up his things. In the old days, he would have headed straight home to his wife, but now he was feeling the need to be much more selfish, heading istead to the fast food place he had grown quite attached to and determined that he would at last defeat the Mega Monster Meal that had, up until now, eluded him.
“Come on, we’ve got to go!” Lucy complained, checking the time as Ryan rushed about after his shower. He’d been late home, getting caught up at a job, sending his wife into a tailspin as she tried to get him ready for her friend’s engagement party. She’d laid his suit out on the bed, his underwear, shoes and socks; knowing exactly how she wanted him to look.
Ryan hated being rushed. So what if they missed the first twenty minutes? Was the world really going to end? It was the side of Lucy he hated most, struggling to pull his socks on as his feet were still so wet.
“Oh,” Ryan mumbled, sucking in his stomach and trying to button up the suit pants. He tugged and pulled, holding his breath as much as he could. “I’m too big for them!” he chuckled with amusement, remembering that he had bought the suit for a wedding less than a year ago, when he was much skinnier. “What a waste of money, these were!” he joked lightheartedly. “I only got to wear them once!”
Lucy stared on in horror. She’d told him again and again to cut down on his eating. Couldn’t he see how bad he looked? Wasn’t he ashamed of how his stomach was starting to develop into a little paunch.
“Relax,” he whispered back, trying to calm her down. “I’ll just pair the jacket with my jeans and then we can head straight out.”
However, Lucy’s face had flushed with anger. “No,” she declared, grabbing her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. “I’m going by myself. I’m not being seen with you, looking like this.”
Ryan stared at her in disbelief. He didn’t have words, listening as she stormed down the stairs and threw the front door closed. He heard her car start and he peeked out the window as that too stormed off down the street; out of view.
Breathing out a sigh of relief, Ryan threw himself down onto the bed; still dressed only in his underwear and socks. How had he married someone so fucking unreasonable? She was just so…
But then a thought came to Ryan, making his brain tingle into life. Had he actually just been given the night to himself? The whole house? Just him? All evening?
He looked down at his thicker stomach and smiled with delight at it. “Thank you!” he laughed aloud, managing to pinch a little and jiggle it in happiness. He felt a twitch in his groin, realising that with the night to himself, he could watch porn or do anything that he wanted. He could order food in. Lots of it! “Yes!”, he nodded, getting more excited and turned on now. This was his night. Free reign to be as selfish as he liked.
Ryan proceeded to indulge himself in every way possible, looking down at his bloated stomach a couple of hours later. Maybe this was it, he thought to himself. Maybe this was the way out of his miserable life with Lucy. He could seize upon her dislike of his weight gain and run with it. Why stop? He’d certainly gone beyond the point of denying himself for the sake of her ideals. There was a path in front of him, the exit sign shining brightly and a new life within his reach. He just needed to have the courage to reach for it.
“A Saturday night to yourself?” Jack laughed, surprised that Ryan had actually followed up on his promises and made it out for a drink. “You must have been a very good boy!” he teased.
Ryan hugged his friend and stood back to admire him slightly. Jack had grown wider since he’d seen him last, his hips and love handles spreading. Teh guy’s face was bigger, cheeks blooming large. And underneath his t-shirt, Ryan could see that the man’s nipples had become pointed, pressing outwards from his puffy former pecs. “I can see that you’ve been having a very good time of things!” he joked, being in the know about how Jack’s kinky sex life worked with his girlfriend.
“I could say the same about you!” Jack smirked back, poking Ryan in his tight little paunch. “Have you and Lucy been having your own kinky fun?” he teased.
“We’re not really talking at the moment, dude,” Ryan explained straight away; keen that he didn’t have to spend the entire night talking about her. “I want out. I’ve reached the end.”
Jack winced sympathetically. “I can’t say that I’m all that surprised after the way you were talking last time. But that still doesn’t explain this,” he pointed back at Ryan’s middle, smirking.
Ryan laughed, having forgottem how quickly Jack could lift his spirits with his cheeky humour. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he replied coyly, smiling with just as much mischief.
“Yes you do!” Jack laughed back, patting Ryan’s paunch properly now. “Did you do it on purpose? Is this to piss Lucy off?”
Again, Ryan laughed. He shruged his shoulders. “Yeah,” he nodded in surprise at Jack’s bluntness. There wasn’t anyone else in the world he could imagine himself admitting this to. “I guess I did,” he smiled, resting his hand over his thicker middle like it was his new prized pet.
“Dude, that’s so awesome!” Jack blasted; his face lighting up with all the enthusiasm Ryan remembered when the pair of them used to get up to mischief in high school. “You love it, don’t you?”
Ryan felt like he was dealing with an excitable puppy, but the interest was infectious. “Well, I can’t say I’m against it,” he replied diplomatically.
“Michelle is going to love this when I tell her,” Jack pressed on, ordering them both a couple of beers. “She said at the pool party that you would make a good fatty.”
“She did?” Ryan asked, surprised that Michelle would talk about other guys in that way.
“Absolutely,” Jack nodded. “She said you’re like me; a similar build; perfect for fattening up, apparently.”
“She really is a kinky one, your Michelle, isn’t she?” Ryan chuckled, feeling strangely aroused by the idea of her talking about him like this.
“How far are you planning on taking it?” Jack pressed him.
“The weight gain? Um, well. I’m not really thinking about anything really. I’m just having some fun,” he answered honestly.
“Dude, if you’re ever going to grow a gut in your lifetime, getting a divorce is one of them.”
“Oh, yeah?” Ryan asked, only half listening now as he tried to work out why there was so much blood pumping into his groin.
“A divorce is like a free pass for so many things. No one will bat an eyelid if you start getting properly fat once you two separate.”
“Well, we’re not quite there yet,” Ryan backtracked, wincing slightly as the word ‘divorce’ came up so casually in their conversation. Lucy hadn’t mentioned it to him yet, and neither had he to her.
“Just imagine it though,” Jack encouraged him. “You, sitting in your own apartment somewhere, drinking as much beer and eating as much pizza as you want after work. No Lucy complaining in the background and telling you off. No massive list of jobs to be completed at the weekend.”
“That does sound pretty sweet,” Ryan admitted; his dick now inexplicably full of blood.
“I just can’t wait to tell Michelle,” Jack said again, more delighted than ever as the pair of them settled in to watch the football game on the big screen.
The realities of splitting from his wife were somewhat different from the fantasies that Jack tried to portray, Ryan soon realised. Divorce was quickly turning into the most expensive thing he had ever done. Lucy’s parents, who had been too impoverished to hire a gardener, or a decorator, or a maintenance guy the entire time he had been married to Lucy, suddenly stumped up the cash to pay for the most cut-throat, killer lawyer for their daughter. With his head in his hands, Ryan soon realised that he was going to have to start from scratch: no home, no pensions, not even his truck for work. The only place that he could afford to live was a room in an apartment downtown, sharing with two students from the local college. Twenty nine years old and here he was, right back at the starting line.
Of the two guys he now lived with, Ryan didn’t see much of Paul, the computer science major. He was often out in the library, or hiding out in his bedroom. That worked fine. With his life turned so upside down, Ryan wasn’t exactly wanting to be dragged out to parties midweek when he had work the next morning. No, the only real pain in Ryan’s ass was Ash; the smart-mouthed literature student with a carefree attitude to life that frustrated Ryan to no end.
“You know, when you get a real job, you’re not going to be able to sit up until 3am watching a movie marathon with your waste of space boyfriend,” he complained at the guy one evening, tired from an exhausting day in work, having been constantly woken by the pair of young lovers laughing so hard at the screen.
“Fine. Whatever,” Ash huffed. “I’ve had a stressful day, okay. I don’t need this.”
“Stressful?” Ryan parroted, feeling the rage bubbling up inside him. “You want to know about stress?” he growled. “You’ve been sitting inside all day typing up an assignment on a computer screen. That’s not what real stress looks like. You’re in college - you have absolutely no idea about the real world; about trying to actually earn a living!”
Ash rolled his eyes. He’d heard it all before.
Sure, Lucy knew how to press Ryan’s buttons, but this boy was on a whole other level. “You graduate with your masters in nine months!” he blasted. “What the hell do you expect to do then? You’ve got no idea, have you? How can you just wander so aimlessly through life?”
“What does it matter?” Ash sighed. “Things always work out in the end.”
“It matters because, trust me, your twenties will be over in a flash and you need to start getting somewhere in life. Not just watching movies until 3am! And certainly not with someone like Ben! You’re just setting yourself up for failure, and it pisses me off!”
“Like you, you mean?” Ash shot back, visibly annoyed. “You’ve done the whole marriage thing, the house, the cars. Yet, you're back here, sharing a shitty apartment with a couple of students. You did everything right, everything the grown-ups told you, and now look at you! Sometimes life is just like that. So stop taking out your frustrations on me and start focusing on yourself instead!”
Ryan didn’t respond. He stormed off to his room and threw himself onto the bed. Then he took a few breaths and considered what Ash had actually said to him. The guy had been right: he was taking his anger out on him. Ash was young, more academically bright than Ryan had ever been, good looking and full of personality. He had his whole life in front of him without any major mistakes under his belt yet. So why did Ryan feel the need to be such an asshole to him?
Despite not officially apologising, Ryan did make an effort to be nicer to Ash over the coming days. He still didn’t care for Ben, the guy's boyfriend, feeling that Ash could do much better. But he was polite and courteous, never failing to put in his earplugs when he knew they were going to be watching TV until late.
Ryan’s weight had not been a priority for him since he’d moved in. Any erotic fantasies he’d indulged himself in last year were thoroughly dampened by the divorce. Yet, his weight continued to climb, spurred on by the cheap, high carbohydrate diet he fell into whilst living in the apartment.
When he was with Lucy, Ryan had indulged himself in sugary treats and even high calorie supplements that he would now consider an eyewatering drain on his monthly budget. He was having to to work harder than ever to bring in the money and his paunch seemed to lose that fluffy softness of his early gains, solidifying into something firmer and more rounded as it continued to push itself out from under his chest.
New clothes were also a luxury that Ryan could ill-afford. His t-shirts fitted awkwardly around the swell of his stomach and there were many times in work when he felt a cool breeze on his butt crack. Beer was the only luxury he allowed himself in those early days, especially on the weekends, when Paul usually went back to visit his family and Ash was generally out partying with his boyfriend. In those few, blissful hours, he could guzzle down his beers whilst sitting in his underwear in front of the shared TV screen, appreciating exactly why he had given up his marriage. Life was hard, but it wasn’t always awful.
Through word of mouth, Ryan had started picking up more work on some of the other rental properties for students that littered this area of town. Desperate for the work, Ryan had been undercutting people quite dramatically in order to guarantee an income for himself. However, trying to get an early start on these types of properties was never as easy. Students were inherently lazy, he decided, whilst banging on the door of one apartment, trying to get someone to let him in. After a full five minutes, a groggy looking guy crawled to the door wearing only his underwear and a t-shirt that was back to front.
“Your landlord sent me to see your air con,” Ryan eventually explained.
Without a word, the exhausted guy simply opened the door further and let Ryan get by. “You’re not going to be noisy are you?” he eventually asked. “My boyfriend is still asleep.”
Ryan looked at his watch. It was almost 10.30 in the morning. Why would anyone still be asleep now?
“It’s okay. I’m getting up anyway,” yawned another guy, waddling sleepily from the bedroom and giving his boyfriend a quick peck on the cheek. It was only then that Ryan clocked him. It was Ben, Ash’s obviously cheating boyfriend; the guy’s face suddenly looking considerably more alert as he too recognised Ryan.
“You’re not going to tell Ash, are you?” Ben shouted, having followed Ryan out of the apartment the second he had finished up; safely out of earshot of his second boyfriend.
“Of course I am,” Ryan replied simply, continuing to walk away, without stopping.
“You’re just going to make him miserable,” the guy shot back. “Is that what you want?”
At this, Ryan laughed. Guilty people always seemed to have such a terrific way of turning things back around on the other person. “Trust me,” he sniggered. “He’ll be way better off without someone like you in his life.”
“Do you think it was easy for me with Ash?” Ben started next; his tone shifting to something nastier. “It’s not exactly easy trying to feel special when your boyfriend has a massive crush on the pot-bellied daddy bear he shares an apartment with. How do you think that made me feel?”
“What are you even talking about?” Ryan laughed, surprised at how far Ben was going with his bullshit. A daddy bear? He was only six years older than Ash.
“Oh, come on. You know exactly what you’re doing,” Ben snapped back, getting more viscious as he realised that Ryan wasn’t willing to compromise with him. “You’re always there, or strutting about in just your underwear, drinking your beers in the living area and being overly friendly. You’ve been trying to fuck things up for the two of us for ages.”
Now Ryan did stop, turning to face Ben properly. “What planet are you living on?” he asked, completely flabbergasted. “I just try to be pleasant. I’m not trying to do anything.”
“Prove it then,” Ben shot back, seizing upon an opportunity. “If you’re really not trying to fuck things up between us, you’ll let this one little indiscretion slide.”
If Ryan hadn’t just had the hardest year of his life, dealing with some of the most despicable, bullying lawyers out there, he may have fallen for Ben’s game. As it was, he wasn’t afraid of standing his ground. “Tell him by the time I get home later. Or I will.”
Ryan crept into the apartment later that evening, finding Paul in the kitchen. “You missed some drama today,” he sighed. “Ash and Ben broke up. I walked in on it all before. It was so awkward.”
“Is Ash okay?” Ryan asked, relieved that Ben had listened to his ultimatum and done the deed himself.
“He’s in his room,” Paul nodded over to the bedroom door. “We’d best leave him be.”
Ryan nodded in complete agreement, deciding to hide out in his room that evening so that Ash didn’t need to see anyone when he would inevitably have to come out for a glass of water, or to use the bathroom.
The evening was slipping away and Ryan had just finished a TV series that he had been charging through for the last two weeks. There was still an hour until he would need to get to sleep; enough time for one last beer, before the inevitable daily grind would start all over again. He strutted out of his bedroom and made for the refrigerator, pausing only briefly to crack the can open and chug a little of it. He burped quietly, finding that the first few mouthfuls of fresh beer always made him the most gassy. Then, suddenly, he heard the door to Ash’s room opening and he stood there, feeling completely caught out.
“Hi,” Ash whispered, not making any pretenses that he was here for any other reason than to see Ryan.
Feeling incredibly awkward, Ryan now regretted coming out of his room without a shirt on; his bloated pot belly on full display. Before today, he wouldn’t have thought twice about it, but Ben’s words had planted an unpleasant seed in his mind that made him question everything he did a little bit more. “I’m sorry to hear about Ben,” he stated straight away. “How are you doing?”
Ash sighed and began to pour his heart out. He knew all about Ryan’s discovery earlier that day and he thanked the guy for doing the right thing.
“I’m just looking out for you,” Ryan nodded, swigging the last of his beer and crushing the can for recycling. He shouldn’t have really had another one. His stomach felt quite painfully bloated and tight after it.
“Oh, and about those things that Ben said to you,” Ash quickly jumped in, seeing that Ryan was heading back to his room. “I hope it’s not going to make things awkward between us.”
Ryan had to think for a second about what Ash was getting at. The crush? Was Ben actually telling the truth about that? “Um, no. Not at all,” he mumbled back, rubbing his hair with a little embarrassment. “Don’t worry about it,” he smiled, finally making his escape.
An evening out with Jack was exactly what Ryan needed a couple of weekends later, as Ryan’s divorce was at last finalised. Unlike Ryan’s months of hell, Jack’s appearance was symbolic of a life of sheer indulgence and pleasure. Unlike Ryan, his body was pure softness, with blubber beginning to creep its way into the guy’s neck and upper arms. His stomach had swollen quite considerably and his butt had a surprising width to it that Ryan had not expected.
“Listen, I didn’t want to message you about this. I kind of feel pretty bad asking you in some ways, knowing what you’re going through,” Jack started after Ryan had finished explaining how the divorce had eventually played out. “I wanted you to be my best man.”
Ryan smiled brightly. “Of course I will,” he beamed, getting up to hug his old friend warmly as he stayed sitting in his chair.
“Thanks,” Jack smiled. “It’s not going to be a huge wedding. Not everyone approves,” he grumbled, rolling his eyes.
“How do you mean?” Ryan asked, sensing that Jack needed to offload.
“Well, Michelle’s parents aren’t coming,” he huffed. “They’d watched Michelle do this to her old boyfriend,” he explained, rubbing the quite substantial shelf of belly fat under his sagging nipples. “So when the same thing started happening to me, they told her they wanted no part in it.”
“Bonus!” Ryan joked, trying to remain upbeat. “My marriage certainly would have gone a lot smoother without the in-laws.”
Jack nodded, seeming to be somewhat in agreement. “Michelle’s not too cut up about it,” he whispered. “Then, well, you remember my dad. He still goes out running three times a week. So he’s not been all that in favour of Michelle and her wholesome home cooking..”
“You can’t live your life for your parents,” Ryan jumped in. It was a lesson he had learned somewhat bitterly when his own church-goin parents had taken Lucy’s side in the divorce. It made him think back to how much they had pushed him to get married in the first place, and he began to resent them, quite justifiably in his opinion.
“I know, I know…” Jack nodded. “And I wouldn’t change a thing. She’s it for me, y’know?”
Ryan raised his beer and they drank to that sentiment.
“What about you?” Jack asked next. “Is there someone new you’ve been holding back from me?”
Ryan shook his head. “No, not at all,” he stated. “Well… I mean…” he hesitated for a moment. “No. No one.”
But Jack’s interest had already been piqued. “Oh, come on. You can’t give me that and then say nothing!” he teased.
Ryan sighed, realising that he had dug himself into a bit of a hole. “It’s nothing,” he huffed at his own stupidity. “It’s just, one of the guys I live with has a bit of a crush on me.”
“Your first chubby chaser!” Jack laughed wickedly.
“Well…” Ryan conceded. “It looks that way, yes. His ex-boyfriend told me off for strutting around the place in just my underwear. He said I had a pot-belly and told me his boyfriend thinks of me as a hot daddy bear!”
Jack chuckled again. “Well, he’s not wrong. You do have quite the pot-belly!”
“Isn’t it a bit weird though?” Ryan asked his friend.
“Being referred to as a daddy bear when you’re only twenty nine?” Jack asked, simultaneously nodding in agreement. “But once you put on a bit of extra meat, that’s just the way people see you. It’s much more arousing to lean into it, rather than try to fight it.”
“Lean into it?” Ryan asked. “That’s your best advice?”
“Just enjoy the attention,” Jack smirked. “So what if he’s a twenty-four year old gay guy? You don’t have to be into someone to appreciate their admiration,” he nodded knowingly. “Trust me on this one. You’ll come to see that I’m right.”
With the divorce at last over with and all lawyers paid off, Ryan began to feel the financial strain starting to ease. Lucy hadn’t been quite as successful in getting all that she wanted from him. The worst case scenario was, thankfully, avoided. A few more months of living with the boys and Ryan would soon have saved enough money to rent his own place instead. With the ties that bound him to his ex-wife now finally disappearing, Ryan began to remember why he had fought so long for this freedom.
“I’ll have the Monster Meat bucket,” he declared, walking into a fast food place and not feeling guilty about the cost for the first time in months. He sucked in the smell of all the greasy goodness and knew that this was a freedom he would never again take for granted. Now he could gorge on as much as he desired and never have to explain himself to anyone. He could literally get as fat as he wanted now he was divorced and single, with no one to please but himself.
As he settled down into a seat, Ryan felt the bliss of devoting all his attention just to his epic meal for a full 20 minutes. It was all the stress relief he had ever needed. No one in here was particularly slim and it seemed, in those moments, that he had taken himself out of a world that so frustrated him, and into one that he felt comfortable in. Sure, he could probably join a gym and drop this weight in a relatively short amount of time. He could train his body hard and attract some beautiful girl to make his ex jealous. But Ryan knew that he had moved beyond that now. He didn’t care what his ex thought of him, or anyone else for that matter.
Or was Ryan just kidding himself? Was this really a moment of clarity? Or would he soon go crawling back to a diet plan the second things started getting rough? He was desperate to believe that wouldn’t be the case, but no one could ever be totally certain when it came to the future. It was only the present he could master. And so, armed with that knowledge, he went back to the counter, even though he felt almost too stuffed to even think about food.
“I’ll have the triple burger, please,” he stated, adding another milkshake to go with it. “He felt his hardess start to tingle, like the old days when he used to do this. Back then, he’d assumed it to be some twisted excitement about pissing Lucy off. Now he realised that this was so much more. This was about taking himself to somewhere he had never allowed himself to imagine going..
“Is this for you?” Ash asked, handing Ryan two boxes of pizza. “The delivery guy was coming up the stairs as I got home.”
“About time!” Ryan sighed, taking the boxes from him and settling back into the chair in front of the sofa. Two pizzas were a necessity for the Friday night baseball game and he was already four beers down. It would have been a perfect night but for the sticky humidity that had loomed over the city for the last few days; making him strip to his boxers as soon as he got home. “Do you follow baseball?” he asked Ash politely, nodding to the couch to see if he wanted to join him; knowing that, with Paul gone for the weekend, Ash would be on his own otherwise.
“No. Watching sports is not really my thing,” Ash replied unenthusiastically, despite continuing to linger around.
“Do you mind getting me another beer then?” Ryan asked,deciding to put the guy to work if he was so free to just stand about like this.
Ash hopped to his task with remarkable speed. “Here you go,” he smiled delightedly, heading straight over and handing it over to him, not seeming to realise that he was blcoking part of the TV screen. “I’ve got some chips and dip if you want some?” he asked next.
“Sure,” Ryan nodded, hoping that the guy would at least sit down then and stop getting in the way.
Once again, Ash went to his task, presenting the chips and dip much better than Ryan ever would have. He placed them on the coffee table and then finally sat himself down on the couch.
“You not having any?” Ryan asked five minutes later, noticing that it was only him actually eating.
“No, thanks,” Ash simply replied, pretending to be interested in the game. “They’re for you. Do you want another beer?”
Ryan felt the remaining liquid in his beer can and nodded, surprised by how diligently he was being looked after. Even when he asked Ash to fetch him the ice cream from the freezer later on, he was surprised that the young guy hopped to it, bouncing off the couch with an enthusiasm he had never seen before.
At the end of the game, Ryan took himself to the bathroom to relieve himself after the seven cans of beer he had ended up consuming. He looked in the mirror and marveled at the reflection he saw within it. Bloated and stuffed, Ryan had never seen his stomach looking so round and tight. Although he had upgraded his underwear a little while back, already these were looking worn and stretched, pulling the waistband down so that a good couple of inches of butt crack were on show. His muscular chest had started to build up with fleshiness in recent weeks and he placed his hand there to feel just how soft it was starting to get under his arms. He pulled the scales out with his foot and wondered just how much he weighed in this overfed state. He stepped on, waiting for the numbers to settle: 256lbs; the biggest number he had ever seen by quite some margin. It was, quite frankly, the cause of an almost instantaneous erection.
“I was wondering, if you’re still hungry, I could make you some pancakes?” Ash asked next as Ryan finally made it out of the bathroom. “I’ve got all the ingredients in.”
Ryan sat himself back down with a grunt and rubbed the shelf of his tight stomach, surprised that Ash was still hanging about the living area. Couldn’t he see how full Ryan was? Was he completely obvious to the heavy breathing and occasional grunt when he had to move, even slightly. He knew that the guy had a little crush, but what on earth was he possibly getting out of all this?
“Go on,” Ash pressed, actually trying to persuade him now. “Just a couple of them; nothing too big.”
Ryan looked up at the guy, already making his way to the kitchen and just waiting for that final nod of approval from him. Out of little more than curiosity, he agreed; watching with interest as he spied Ash settling to his task. Was he really using that much oil to fry the batter mix up? Was he actually rubbing butter into them? Did he really need to pour on that much syrup?
Despite tasting amazing, Ryan knew that every mouthful he was taking was completely and utterly packed full of calories and fat. As if desperate for his approval, Ash had watched him consume every bite of them. A sweat had begun to pour off Ryan’s forehead, but he wasn’t entirely sure that this one was caused by the humidity. “I am absolutely stuffed!” Ryan declared, grunting and rubbing the stretched out ball of stomach fat. “I haven’t eaten this much in ages,” he chuckled. “Not since I was trying to piss off my ex-wife after she told me she liked me being skinny.” “You were putting on weight on purpose?” Ash asked, quite startled by the comment.
“I was going for it, like you wouldn’t believe!” Ryan nodded. “Unless you’ve been through it, it’s hard to comprehend how petty you can be towards the end of a bad marriage,” he grinned, suddenly noticing that his hands were all over his own rounded stomach. “I was even taking this special calorie supplement shake you can buy, just to speed things up,” he laughed, thinking back.
“Oh!” Ash exclaimed knowledgeably, suddenly naming the exact brand .
They both went quiet. What a strange piece of trivia for Ash to just know, thought Ryan. The guy seemed to sense that too, suddenly looking a little sheepish.
“Do you still take them?” Ash asked next, trying to look a little less interested than his excitable voice made him sound.
“I don’t need to,” Ryan grinned, tapping his fully grown pot belly. I just weighed myself twenty minutes ago. I’ve put on another 40lbs since I moved in here. It seems that I just can’t stop these days!” He yawned, standing up and stretching. “Anyway, buddy. I need to head to sleep,” he declared, seizing upon the fact that his erection from the overeating had at last subsided.
“Do you think there is a way to tell if someone is like your Michelle?” Ryan asked the next time he caught up with Jack at the very hastily organised stag party.
“How do you mean?” Jack asked, only a little worse for wear as he and Ryan gradually fell to the back of the crowd of friends taking them to the next bar.
“You know… Someone who is into the idea of helping someone else gain weight,” Ryan explained, trying to keep his voice fairly low.
Jack chuckled. “Oh, trust me, you’ll spot them!” he nodded. They’re not exactly subtle. “They’ll find ways to ensure you’re eating and they’ll probably want to watch too. If they’re anything like Michelle, they’ll probably try to keep your activity levels low and complement you at the weirdest times; like when you’re bloated from overeating.”
Ryan nodded, taking it all in and finding a striking resemblences to Ash’s more recent behaviours. “Anything else?” he asked.
Jack considered for a moment. “The compliments,” he added next. “They’re totally bizarre. If they’re praising you for overeating, that’s a pretty sure sign. But sometimes they may try to convince you that you look better, or more masculine, or whatever it is they think you want to hear. When the reality is, you just look fat.”
Again, Ryan nodded, keen to match Jack’s thoughts to his own observations of Ash. “You see, I think I might have…”
“Come on!” shouted their drunk friends up ahead. “The night is still young. Stop waddling behind and get your big butts up here!”
Jack and Ryan smirked at each other. Despite Jack’s rather considerable extra weight, Ryan had been lumbered in exactly the same category. The pair of them were, for better or worse, the fat guys on this trip.
“You’re back!” Ash smiled late the next day as an exhausted Ryan made it home. “Did you have a nice time? Are you hungry? I could make you something to eat?”
Ryan looked again at the time. “You’re still up!” he asked with surprise, knowing that Ash always had an early class on Monday mornings.
“Well, I wanted to check that you got home okay,”Ash replied, heading to the kitchen and renewing his offer to make something for his roommate.
Smirking at the fact that he was being fussed over and mothered by a good-looking twenty-four year old, Ryan had been disappointed that he hadn’t had more alone time to discuss this situation he was in, with his buddy, Jack. “Okay,” he nodded, deciding to just let Ash do his thing. “Sure, that would be nice.” He headed for a shower, returning to find an enormous, steaming hot lasagne, glistening with grease and cheese, sitting there on a plate, ready to be eaten. “Did you make this from scratch?” he asked Ash.
Ash nodded. “I remembered you saying that lasagne used to be your favourite dish growing up. I’ve never made it before, but I made a whole bunch of them and portioned them up in the refrigerator for when you get hungry.
Ryan smiled at the effort Ash had clearly gone to for him; a whole new level of care and attention. He opened his mouth to try some and nodded in approval. The lasagne really was delicious, although it was more than obvious just how much oil, cream and several different types of cheeses had gone into it to make it really quite extremely high in calories. If all the beer and fast food hadn’t ensured his pants would be tighter tomorrow, this little calorie bomb sure would.
“How was the weekend, anyway?” Ash asked, sticking around for the show and watching Ryan devour every bite.
“Pretty good,” Ryan nodded. “I had a couple of jibes from some of my old school friends about my weight. But we all turn thirty this year, so the dad-bod is definitely where most of them are at now anyway. I’m just the one who has already graduated from that stage,” he winked at Ash, tapping his gut.
“What did they say?” Ash asked with surprising interest, placing a cushion over his crotch.
“Oh, you know,” Ryan went on, deciding to play up to whatever kinky fantasies he thought his roomate may be having. “Just pointing stuff out to me: telling me how tight my clothes are, how slow I was when we were walking to different places and calling me out on how much I was eating when we went for food.”
“They’re probably just jealous,” Ash shot back straight away.
Ryan smirked. There was no way any of the guys were in the least bit jealous of his sprouting pot belly, making him all but invisible to the many hot girls they bumped into that weekend. This was clearly just another one of those bizarre compliments that Jack had told him to look out for. “Yeah, you’re right,” he lied to Ash, rubbing his bloating gut as he chugged down a few of the sodas Ash had supplied with his late night meal. “I’m sure they are jealous, deep down.”
Stepping on the scale was not something that Ryan did all that often. He could feel his stomach’s rounded shape starting to swell even larger, and he knew, from the fit of his underwear and pants, that his thighs and butt were also bearing the brunt of all that he was consuming each day. Still, as he stepped up, early one Sunday morning, after a particularly gluttonous take-out weekend of having the apartment to himself, Ryan’s eyes widened in shock: 278lbs! “Fuck!” he blasted in shock, before laughing to himself at how fast the latest few pounds had slipped on. He really weighed that much? He didn’t feel that heavy! He strolled over to the mirror inspecting his shape. Sure, his gut was pretty well developed by now and all the extra eating had sure softened his chest up rather a lot. He spun, noting that his butt’s width was quite considerable now, with back fat bulding at his sides and folding under his shoulder blades. Yet, he still didn’t feel like he should weigh 278lbs! Somehow, he had always imagined a guy that size being much bigger than this. What Ryan actually felt as he saw himself there, was very small still; acting as a licence for him to continue to indulge.
Jack’s wedding was fast approaching as the weeks rolled by. After being fitted for their suits, Ryan and Jack headed out for something to eat.
“That tailor seemed pretty pissed off that we left it this late to get ourselves measured for the wedding outfits,” Ryan noted as they sat down and grabbed the menus. “I guess we’ll have to cross our fingers that they can get those pants in for you in time.”
“It’ll be fine,” Jack shrugged. “I put on weight every week, so there would have been no point in going any earlier. I would just have outgrown them. “I’m almost 350lbs these days.”
Ryan nodded. Jack did indeed look impressively large, yet he was only 60lbs or so bigger than he was. And Ryan still felt tiny in comparison. “I know what you mean,” Ryan agreed. “I split some pants the other day. I’d only bought them four weeks before.”
“It’s weird, isnt it. When you’re gaining weight, you’re so tuned into how your body feels and looks. Yet, at the same time, you’re completely oblivious to it as well; how tight your clothes are getting, or how large you seem to other people.”
Ryan nodded enthusiastically. He felt so glad that Jack noticed this as well, sparking a lively conversation between the pair.
“You’ll be getting your own place soon, I take it?” Jack asked. “The two students you're sharing with must be graduating soon?”
“A couple of months,” Ryan nodded, suddenly realising that he had been a little lazy in his hunt for a new apartment.
“That’ll be nice!” Jack smiled. “Your own space at last!”
“Well, it’s not too bad as it is,” Ryan explained. “Paul is never there at weekends. And now he’s got himself a girlfriend, he’s not there much in the week either.”
“And what about the other one? The one you used to fight with loads?”
“Yeah, he’s there a lot, but… we don’t argue so much these days,” he admitted; suddenly feeling the desire to say so much more about kinky little Ash.
“Before I foget,” Jack jumped in. “Michelle wants to know who you’re bringing as your ‘plus one’ to the wedding next week.
“I’ve got a ‘plus one’?” Ryan asked, genuinely surprised.
“Dude!” Jack grumbled. “Seriously?”
“I’ll find someone,” Ryan replied hastily, seeing how stressed Jack was getting.
“What about that girl you were hinting at when we briefly chatted during my stag party?” Jack asked, clearly keen to get a name locked in.
Ryan thought for a moment. Had Jack assumed he had some potential hot chubby chaser girl on the go? He pondered the idea, realising, quite suddenly, that he didn’t really need one. In the most unexpected way, everything that he had yearned for in life had already arrived. “Hey, Jack,” he asked thoughtfully. “How did you know that Michelle was the one for you?”
“She’s gorgeous,” Jack shot back with a sly grin.
“Besides that,” Ryan insisted. “How did you know that you guys were meant to be together?”
Jack sighed. “I guess…” he began softly, “...it was the way she made me feel: so loved and cared for; admired and adored. I’ve never felt that from anyone before.” He seemed moved, just by talking about her. “Plus she dominated me and forced me to pack on over 150lbs of pure fat; which is one of the kinkiest fucking things I could ever have imagined!” he joked, trying to lighten the mood.
Ryan laughed and nodded. He made a crack about how much fatter Jack might be after he got home from his honeymoon, but, really, his mind was elsewhere; with someone else entirely.
Ryan arrived home to see a large crate of beers resting on the kitchen counter tied up with a ginormous red bow. He laughed, seeing that it was his favourite brand and noticing that a large tray of assorted doughnuts lay beside it.
“Do you like your present?” Ash asked, coming out of his bedroom with a huge smile on his face.
“You bought these for me?” Ryan asked, feeling his mouth watering at the sight of the doughnuts, even after how much he had eaten with Jack that afternoon.
As if psychically linked, Ash began unpackaging the doughnuts for him, leaving them open for him to stuff one into his mouth. “They’re to say thank you. I just had my novel manuscript accepted for publishing.”
Ryan nearly spat out his doughnut. “You’ve been writing a novel?” he blasted in shock. “Since when?”
“Since you kept reminding me that I need to do something with my life; back when you first moved in.”
“I was being an asshole,” Ryan confessed. “I didn’t mean to make you feel…”
“You gave me the kick up the ass that I needed,” Ash threw back with a smile. “You always told me how clever I was and that I could do anything.”
“You’re an amazing person,” Ryan marvelled. “In fact, you’re the best person I’ve ever met in my life!” For weeks now, he had worried that his behavious around Ash, indulging his little feeder tendencies in subtle ways, had only brought the guy to fetishize him. Their relationship was merely one of a simple exchange: Ryan would enjoy being overfed and catered for by his roommate, and Ash would get to enjoy the subtle art of ensuring a guy that he found attractive, continued to pile on a few pounds. Now, however, every sense felt strangetly heightened in this moment of celebration. He couldn’t believe that Ash had been secretly writing away for months when Ryan had assumed the guy to be inside his bedroom, playing games. Just how blind had he been this entire time?
Ryan took a step forward and Ash did not retreat. He grabbed the much smaller guy’s shoulders and held them firmly. Again, Ash did not stop him. Then, seeing the inviting, warm look on Ash’s face, Ryan took the biggest risk of his life, going in for a kiss and desperately hoping that Ash’s lips would move to meet his.
Unbelievably, Ash was kissing him back, moaning gently, as if luxuriating in something he had never wanted more in his life. The kiss became intense, very quickly. With his shirt lifted off him, Ryan felt the handsome guy’s hands rubbing all over his stomach. Before he knew it, Ryan was being guided into the living space, his sweatpants ripped down and then his body pushed with surprisingly kinky force, back into his usual chair in front of the TV.
Ryan looked up at Ash with startled arousal. The guy seemed so naturally suited to taking charge. He would have known that this was Ryan’s first gay experience and he led the way with ease, erasing any opportunity for awkward fumblings to slip in. He cracked open one of the chilled beers and fetched the tray of doughnuts from the kitchen counter. Then, when he was sure that Ryan was settled, he plunged his whole mouth down onto the fat guy’s crotch.
Ryan’s whole body twitched.This wasn’t a blow job, he thought to himself, feeling the intense stimulation straight away. He found himself moaning, even when he was trying not to. Was this intense pleasure what it was supposed to have been like all along? Lucy had never made much of an effort with anything in the bedroom, but Ash’s mouth was doing things to him that Ryan could never have dreamed of. He supped on his beer and ate a doughnut, feeling Ash’s hands rubbing the spherical shape of his stomach, clearly getting off on making this moment all about him.
Barely two doughnuts in and Ryan felt his body lurching as it wanted to climax. Ash worked his pace even more, feeling the throbbing in his mouth. Then, when the moment came, he pushed his mouth even deeper, sending Ryan’s hardness all the way down his throat. The pleasure; the orgasm; that intensity. It was unlike anything Ryan had ever experienced in his life.
There was no going back.
Over the following week, Ryan discovered that Ash had a whole arsenal of tactics to please him. Not only did the guy continue to fuss over him with his cooking and snack deliveries, but his tight, energetic little butt seemed determined to outdo every single previous sexual experience that Ryan had ever had. They spoke at length about their attraction to each other and how smitten they both had become. Ryan had no hesitation in inviting Ash to be his date for Jack’s wedding. And, in fact, spending so much time with a now professional writer, really helped Ryan to produce the best speech he could have wished for. Rather than feeling sick with nerves as the big day arrived, he felt excited and pumped, heartily stuffing himself on the big breakfast Ash had so lovingly prepared for him.
“Your friends really aren’t keen on Michelle, are they?” Ash commented later that evening, as the pair of them were reunited after Ryan’s time sitting at the top table and the endless photographs that needed taking.
“Um, no,” Ryan nodded. “Not so much.”
“I had no idea that your friend, Jack, used to be so slim before he met her,” he whispered, fearing that one of their families might overhear. “Your buddies seem to think she’s the devil incarnate!”
Ryan chuckled. He’d heard it all before. “She’s lovely really,” he tried, looking over at the pair of them as Michelle spoonfed her 350lb husband a large piece of their wedding cake. “She just… knows what she wants.”
“I think everyone here can see exactly what it is she wants,” Ash joked back as Jack’s full, swollen belly was patted with approval by his new wife. “It makes me wonder what your friends are going to say about me eventually.”
Ryan pulled Ash into him by holding his slim hips in his chubby hands. They had decided that it was best to go easy on the public displays of affection, considering that this was their first time out together as a couple. However, Ryan simply could not help himself. “Oh, yes?” he asked keenly.
“I certainly don’t have any plans to put you on a diet,” Ash grinned, fingering the skin between the stretched buttons of Ryan’s beer swollen gut.
Ryan growled in lustful approval. His hands slipped onto Ash’stight, toned butt and pulled the guy in even closer.
“In fact, how come you’re not eating a big slice of wedding cake for me right now?” Ash teased.
Ryan moaned lightly. This was exactly what he wanted. He knew how much scrutiny he was under today. He could feel the judgemental eyes upon him, for his shocking weight gain, the fit of his tight shirt, and the fact that he was dating someone none of them had ever expected. He should have been nervous or self conscious. However, with Ash in his arms, Ryan had never felt more free to be himself. “But won’t that make me even fatter?” he teased back.
Ash smiled. “Oh… I hadn’t thought of that,” he joked, accepting the kiss that Ryan soon bestowed upon him.
Ryan felt Ash’s hands feeling his big, broad butt as they kissed; the pants he had been measured for only a week ago, starting to feel rather uncomfortable after only a week of dating the handsome twenty-four year old. The kiss ended and both of them laughed, realising how ridiculously long it had taken to get to this point.
“Is this along the lines of what you had in mind for me?” Ryan asked moments later, pushing out his stomach as far as it would go and stretching those buttons even more.
Ash seemed thrilled, looking around the room in surprise that Ryan was making himself look so large in front of everyone that he knew at the wedding. He smiled, rubbing the underside of Ryan’s ball-like gut and then leaned in to whisper. “I guess you’ll just have to wait and see,” he teased.
Ryan growled in lustful appreciation, then took his boyfriend’s hand and led the way to the wedding cake.
Exactly one year to the day, Ryan and Ash were sitting in that same room, together with Jack and Michelle, celebrating a year since the wedding. They reminisced fondly, thinking about the perfect day it had been and laughing about how shocked everyone had been after Jack came back 30lbs heavier from his two week honeymoon.
“You can’t be far off the weight I was this time last year,” Jack noted, surveying his buddy’s hefty appearance.
“Possibly,” Ryan nodded, rubbing his large stomach. “I still don’t feel big yet though,” he replied, as if he was oblivious to the enormous ball-shaped gut and the groaning of the chair, supporting his wide butt and mostrous 347lb body.
“Unless I ask him to do something,” Ash jumped in comically. “Then he always says he’s too fat to do anything!” he joked, making everyone chuckle.
“I’m actually going to be pushing Jack to five hundred pounds this year,” Michelle explained, taking her morbidly obese husband’s hand as if this was an announcement that thay had been planning for some time.
Ryan noticed Jack staring at his face for a reaction; perhaps some surprise that his old school buddy was so ensnared by his beautiful wife that he was willing to take his weight gain to such extremes for her.
“He’s going to be a lot of work for you at that size!” Ash grinned conspiratorily at Michelle. “I hope you’re ready for that?” he laughed.
“Oh, I’m counting on it!” Michelle smirked, rubbing the 430lb man’s knee under the table.
“You’re a very lucky guy,” Ryan nodded at his friend in approval.
“There you go, Ash,” Michelle smirked. “It sounds like we may have another willing volunteer to join the five hundred pound club,” she nodded towards a jealous looking Ryan.
“You’re joking aren’t you?” Ryan laughed. “Ash is heading off on his second book tour in March. “I won’t be gaining anything for almost two months whilst he’s gone. I’ll probably just wate away!”
“You liar!” Ash teased him back. “Last time I was away, you pretty much lived on takeout and put on almost twenty pounds in a month,” he chuckled.
“I don’t remember you complaining,” Ryan smiled back; his voice dripping with affection and lust.
Michelle looked at them both, clearly wanting to cut through their mushy meanderings. “So, five hundred pounds?” she asked again, trying to circle the conversation back. “I’m getting the impression that you boys are kinky enough to enjoy seeing that on Ryan,” she pressed; ever the bad influence.
Ryan and Ash looked at each other with a wicked excitement in their eyes.
“We’ll talk about it when we get home,” Ash stated diplomatically. Unlike Michelle, he liked to be a little more discreet about his kinks and fantasies when it came to enjoying Ryan’s large body.
Ryan smirked and winked at his old buddy Jack. He knew exactly how to read between the lines of whatever Ash said. There was no way he was going to pass up the opportunity to get Ryan to that size. And so, just like his high school best pal, Ryan was as good as setting sail for five hundred pounds. How insanely arousing was that?
“Eat up, my friend,” Ryan smiled competitively at Jack. “I’m coming for you, Fat Boy!”
#gainer fiction#gainer stories#gay feedee#gainerstory#gayfeeder#gayfeedee#gainerfic#gainer story#gainerstories#gainer fic
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Trust Your Own Creativity
This was going to be a “stuck on how to design a character’s personality? Throw them in a fanfic!” post but the meat of what I was trying to say evolved (much like the point of this post).
I have three side characters from book one of a series (ENNS, out 8/25, yeeeee!) that have much larger roles in book two. The problem I’ve been having is that I have no idea what their personalities are beyond the barest that they got in the first book because they just weren’t that important. So I’ve been trying to force something to come together. Along the lines of “well I need a character like this” and “I guess I can make this work” which does not, in fact, work.
Just tossed two of them into a “fanfic” to get to know them, a story completely isolated from the rest of the canon like their own little sandbox to play in, and I’ll experiment and see what castles they build.
So when I say trust your own creativity, I mean that writing and worldbuilding and character creation is far less “active design” and much more “active discovery”. One of my all time favorite things to write is backstory monologues. I. Love. Monologues. While I usually have a rough idea before the big speech, when it comes time to write it, it’s usually written as if I’d improvised it on stage and aside from trimming where needed and clarifying what’s muddy, it’s not only usually good to go, but it’s probably not exactly what I’d planned or envisioned to begin with.
I just let my characters talk, I give them the floor, and I wait to hear what they say. A lot of the time, they’ll say something absolutely brilliant (or stupid) that was not at all planned for them, but works so well it has altered the trajectory of their whole arc. Which wouldn’t have happened if I’d stuck religiously to The Plan.
Which is why it’s really hard for me to outline. Yes, all my books have goals and a skeleton of a plot, i.e. “must hit points A-G in this order” but the story is usually freeform. Whenever I need to make rewrites, the plot never changes, but the story might. I might swap out an argument for something softer or change the tone of a scene where needed, molding my little clay words into the sculpture it will become eventually.
You are a creative. Let your creativity speak, and then listen to it.
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Tainted love: Dark!Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader/Agatha Harkness/Agnes x fem!reader
Masterlist
Pairing: Alright so this starts as a Dark!Wanda Maximoff x reader and then it turns to be Agatha Harkness x reader (I really like the idea of Agatha helping and saving reader)
Based on the cover songsTainted love by Holy Wars and Hannah Peel´s cover of the same song
Summary: You´re living an unhappy marriage with Wanda and your neighbor Agnes decides to help you to get away from the person who makes you suffer.
Warnings: Toxic relationship, angst, Wanda maintains you captive inside Westview, mentions of kidnapping, Wanda manipulates and alters reader´s memory, gaslighting, mentions of blood.
Word count: 12k+
Author´s note: This was one of the first stories I wrote three years ago, I had posted them on Tumblr on my old account, but due to my mental health, I had to take a break from Tumblr and the toxicity and hate that had suddenly increased, I deleted all of my stories and my old account, now I have decided to upload them again here on Tumblr and also on Ao3.
I hope you like it!
If you enjoy, could you comment, like or reblog? it would help a lot really ♥️
Taglist: @midnight-lestrange @eliscannotdance
Sometimes I feel I’ve got to
“Printsessa you don´t have to worry about anything! You´re fine here with me, what´s outside doesn´t matter to us, there´s nothing important outside!” You remembered Wanda hissing at you all of those words, but you didn´t understand why it felt like a dream, as if it wasn´t real, you were sure she had yelled at you the day before today but then, why it felt as if you had dreamt about it, the memory was a little blurry but you could remember her frustrated face, was it real? If it was, why were you discussing about? You couldn’t tell.
You couldn’t remember what had happened yesterday, had you gone out for some groceries? Had you gone to Dottie´s place? Why you couldn’t remember?
You sat up in your bed, and more questions came to your mind, at what time had you gone to sleep yesterday? Why you couldn’t remember simple things like that? You started to feel frustrated and tried to focus on your mind, what were all of these images of Wanda and you discussing?
“Why do you want to go outside so bad? Here you have everything you need, I´m giving you everything you want, I don´t understand why you want to leave, it doesn’t make sense to me!” Was this a memory? Have you dreamt about it? Wanda would never yell at you right? She wouldn’t never yell at you; she had told you that many times, you repeated yourself in your mind.
“Printsessa? Are you alright?” You heard Wanda asking beside you, you felt her hand passing around your waist
“I don´t know” You said while closing your eyes.
“Are you having nightmares again, my love?” You frowned
“Nightmares?” You asked with a confused look on your face
“Yes, don´t you remember? You´ve been having nightmares for the past days, you always wake up in the middle of the night, and I have to calm you, did you have nightmares again?” Wanda was really concerned, so they were just nightmares? That had to be.
But why were you doubting? You believed her right? She couldn’t be lying, could she?
“I don’t remember having them, but-“ Wanda suddenly moved herself to get closer to you and her sudden action made you feel scared, unconsciously you moved to the side and you blinked, why had you done that? You weren’t scared of her, then why did you do it?
You could see the hurt in her eyes, and you couldn’t help but feel bad, you had wanted to touch her hand to say something, but you felt there was something wrong, you couldn’t shake the feeling off.
“I can make them go away if you want lyubimaya moya” You saw the worried look on your wife´s face, there was something missing in the way she spoke, her soft tone was still there but you couldn’t tell what was missing, it felt different, and you felt frustrated, why couldn’t you remember anything from the other days? You only had some glimpses of some things, but you weren’t even sure if they were memories, dreams or nightmares.
“No!” You hastily said, you were surprised with your own behavior, why were you suddenly feeling so afraid of her magic?
“Can I hold you?” Looking at her face the only thing you saw was sadness, but why? You felt the need to let her hold you and rest your head on her chest but there was this part of you, a voice in the back of your head that told you to stay away, but you didn’t get why, she was your wife, you didn’t have to be afraid of your own wife.
Deciding to ignore that unnerving feeling in your heart, you slowly nodded and Wanda started to come closer to you, this time she did it slower, her hands up in the air as if she was letting you know she wouldn’t do anything to you, oddly her action made you feel a lot more comfortable about what she was doing, she passed her hand around your waist, her grip was soft but firm at the same time, you started to relax in her arms and slowly you pressed your head onto her chest, for a moment you felt calmed again, you felt the love she promised you, the heat of her body against yours made you remember of how a home felt.
“I´m really sorry printsessa, I just want us to be happy, but you don´t let me help you, I will make these nightmares go away, nothing will ever make you feel this way, I just want you to be happy” Before you could separate yourself from her, her grip around you became stronger, it wasn’t soft anymore, you could feel her hand on your waist, holding you tightly against her but in a harsh way, you wanted her to stop holding you so harsh but she was stronger, before you could do something else she put her fingers on your temple, you couldn’t do anything else, closing your eyes you felt unconscious in her arms.
Wanda held your unconscious body against her, she hated doing this to you, but the real memories were messing with the fake ones she had put in your mind, she couldn’t lose you, no one more time, she was not going to let that happen, you had been gone for so long and now that she had you back, she was not planning on letting you go, after all you were alright with her, nothing could hurt you anymore.
“I´m doing this to you because I love you y/n, you´re safe here with me, just with me, I would never hurt you” Wanda whispered into your ear, her eyes closed, her grip on you started to become softer and with her free hand softly caressed your face, Wanda hoped you would understand why she was doing this, it was all for you.
Get away from the pain
You woke up to an empty bed, where was Wanda? Frowning you stood up from your bed, you couldn’t help but feel as if you had already woken up hours ago, was it in the morning or in the middle of the night? Or maybe you just hadn’t slept well, and that was why you felt so sore.
Maybe taking a shower would help to ease the pain in your head, your headache was growing and you just wanted to lay back in bed again, but you felt as if you had already slept for many hours, you really didn’t want to go back to bed.
Physically you felt exhausted, the constant headaches were awful and the tiredness you felt almost all the time was unbearable, you wanted to go out to do something else, but at the same time you didn’t feel like going out.
This made you feel conflicted you just wanted the pain to stop, but you didn’t know how.
You were supposed to be happy; you were sharing your life with Wanda, you were her wife she had given you everything you had asked for, a family, you were living peacefully with her, but then why you felt so miserable? It made no sense at all, you felt so alone in this big house, there were so many rooms and you felt like every single thing hid something inside them.
A piece of paper on your nightstand distracted you from your thoughts, you knew it had been Wanda the one who left the small paper, taking it into your hands you saw Wanda´s handwriting, she had gone out again, this time she told you it was something about her job? Last time it had been something about a committee, it was alright, you started to relax a little but, why? You missed her terribly but at the same time there was this part of you that made you want to get away from her, she had never yelled at you or hit you, but whenever she was close to you, the way her hand gripped you a little too harsh, the way she told you everything would be alright, made you feel a little uncomfortable, there was a memory of her in your mind, a memory of a loving Wanda who used to hold you against her chest, singing Sokovian lullabies into your ear when you were afraid, her touch used to be soft, now her touch was severe.
A bunch of new thoughts started to come to your mind, Wanda said they were nightmares, but were they really nightmares? You tried to focus on these thoughts, how her behavior had changed, all the little things that she now did, you remembered she had always been a jealous person, but her new possessiveness scared you.
If she saw you talking to someone, she would get so jealous, so jealous that you even feared her reaction.
What she used to do was what made you stop talking to everyone who was just being nice to you, you didn’t understand her harsh tone against the others, but what made you feel more confused was that the others didn’t mind Wanda talking to them the way she did, like that time when Dottie had asked you how your days had been going at the supermarket, you were sure Wanda was on the other side of the store, she had told you she would go check for some fruit and you wandered around, you bumped into Dottie near the cereals isle, Dottie only asked you a simple question and before you could even answer, Wanda appeared out of nowhere, telling Dottie to go bother someone else, that she was not in the mood to deal with her, your wife didn’t even give Dottie time to explain herself, you couldn’t even hear a word Dottie said, because your angry wife took your wrist with such an angry and harsh grip, guiding you to the entrance, you didn’t even buy anything!
Wanda dragged you to your house, all the way to your home she didn’t say anything to you, you felt so scared to even talk to her, Wanda didn’t notice she was hurting you, you tried taking her hand off you but that only made her angrier.
You blinked several times, here there were those memories again, at this point you were pretty sure they were memories, but when had they happened? You just wanted to know what was going on, Wanda told you that she loved you, but why it didn’t feel like that anymore?
Trying to ignore all of these thoughts you decided to go for a walk, now that Wanda wasn’t at your home, you had the chance to go out without her constant surveillance, maybe you could even talk to someone other than just your wife, it didn’t matter who, you just needed someone else to talk about anything, at this point you didn’t even care what it could be, you even wished you could find Dottie to just hear her talking about her meetings.
After changing your clothes, you went downstairs, looking around everything you felt there was something so strange about this house, and you couldn’t even put your finger on what it was, you felt awful, frustrated, you couldn’t even remember many things, and this only made you feel worse.
Going outside your house you notice how everything was so nice, the day was really pretty, the sun wasn’t too bright and the wind was refreshening, it was good to be outside, you didn’t even remember when was the last time you had been outside alone, it felt like it had been days since you were on your own here outside.
Walking through the streets you noticed there wasn’t anyone outside, what was going on? Why nobody was in the streets? Not even Dottie was in her garden, there weren’t children playing in the street, how was that even possible? You tried to think If the other times when Wanda and you had gone for a walk, there were people a lot of people for what you could recall, you even went to some houses to try to see if there were people in there, but you couldn’t see anything, and fear took over you, your lips started to tremble, everything was quiet and you found the silence unsettling, there was definitely something odd happening, after some more minutes of wandering alone through the solitary street and with your pounding heart you decided to walk back to your house.
“Y/n sweetheart?” A voice distracted you from your thoughts, you turned yourself around too look at the person who had called you.
“Agnes!?“ You exclaimed with a happy tone, you were happy to see someone else, and Agnes was a gentle person to you, so you felt really happy to see her
"Thanks you’re here, it seems like you’re the only person around here” You said, with your voice trembling a little.
Agnes noticed your agitated state and felt concerned about you, you were really upset and she could see it, the way you were constantly rubbing your hands against your clothes, the way you were looking your surroundings as if you were afraid of something appearing, she was sure it was because Wanda wasn’t near this place, she was sure Wanda had gone to the limits that was why no one here was moving, but she didn’t want to scare you or upset you more.
“Oh darling it may be because it’s Sunday and everyone must be watching that show that airs on Sundays” She tried to reassure you with a smile on her face, her answer seemed to calm you a little bit because you stopped biting your lip as well as you stopped turning your head to look at your surroundings, your shoulders also seemed to relax a little more, and that made her feel a little calm, she didn’t like seeing you in such a distressed state.
You thought a little about her answer and it made sense to you, you remember that show that Wanda liked to watch on Sundays, but another thought came to your head, if it was Sunday then why Wanda had told you she had left for something related to work?
“Isn’t Wanda with you?” Agnes noticed how you shook your head a little at the mention on her name
“She’s not home, she left for-” You thought a little about whether was right to tell her or not, Agnes wasn’t a bad person, you couldn’t remember interacting a lot of her, but at the same time you felt you had already talk to her many times, she made you feel calm, her presence was recomforting and there was this feeling that made you trust in her.
“She left for something related to work” You saw how Agnes frowned at that.
It didn’t make sense to her, Wanda didn’t even work? She was going to ask you more things but the way you looked, she felt bad, you looked too tired and the sadness and you had in your eyes, she couldn’t see you like this, it was clear you were suffering.
“Would you like to come home with me? You can help me with a new recipe I’ve been wanting to try for some time doll” She softly asked you and you liked the idea, you really wanted to do something else so you nodded, you saw the way she smiled and you smiled too, she waited for you to start to walk and the two of you walked side by side, arriving at her house she opened the door for you and a quick memory of Wanda opening a door for you in a complete different place came to your mind, you blinked a little, what had been that?
“Are you alright sweetheart?” Agnes noticed how your expression changed for a confused one.
“I’m alright” you told her in a rush and she let you in, you slowly entered and you felt different, it was a different feeling to be inside her house.
Agatha knew you weren’t alright, she knew what Wanda was doing, she knew everyone else was under Wanda´s mind control, but why would she do it to the person the red-head was supposed to love? Her first plan had been to take Wanda’s powers, but now her plans had changed, she wanted to take your suffering away, she had tried to wake you up many other times, using her powers and it didn’t work, Wanda’s powers were really strong, the only thing that could wake you up was that you went outside Westview, but she knew Wanda wouldn’t let you do that, so she had to think of something else. She needed to do it quickly you were really suffering and she was sure Wanda’s magic had started to mess with your head, you didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t. For now, she could only try to make you feel a little better. She had to try to make you feel a little happy in all this messed up situation.
“Alright doll, so wanna start with the fun?” She asked you with her cheerful tone.
“Sure, yes, I love cookies, I want to help you bake them, where do we start?” You asked her trying to ignore the intrusive thoughts that came to your mind.
“First you will need an apron, you don’t want to get yourself stained with eggs and chocolate powder, right darling?” You nodded and she showed you a really pretty apron, she handed it to you and when you were about to tie it, she took the laces that were in your back.
“Let me do it for you darling” You felt shy at her action, you knew she used to be like that all the time, so you let her tied them for you, it was a nice gesture.
“Alright darling there you go” Agnes winked at you and you shyly smiled.
“Then let’s start, shall we doll?” You nodded and she grabbed different bowls, spoons and containers and placed them on the kitchen Island.
You came closer to her and she asked you to start pouring the eggs on the bowl but when you were about to do it, she stopped you.
“Wait darling, aren´t you going to take your pretty ring off your hand?” She inquired eying the ringer in your finger.
You blinked your eyes and slowly turned your look to your fingers, you didn´t think about it and a question came to your head, when did Wanda and you got married? Why couldn’t you remember it? You frowned a little thinking about that, why couldn´t you remember that? It was supposed to be an important moment of your life and you couldn’t recall that day.
“Are you alright doll?” You heard Agnes asking behind you.
“Yes, yes I´m alright” You said slowly to her, and took off the ring of your finger
“Do you want me to put that in a safe place so you don’t lose it?” You gave the ring to her and she took it in her hand, you saw that she put it in a small box in one of the shelves.
“Alright doll, now you can keep doing what you were going to do” Agnes said walking back to the kitchen island with her typical smile on her face.
You smiled and started to mix the ingredients in the bowl, you were really grateful to do something new, you couldn’t even remember when had been the last time you had done something else than just staying at home with Wanda and sometimes going out with her for some groceries or a short walk, Wanda was always with you now that you thought about it, but it was more like if you were under her surveillance, you shook your head, you were really enjoying your time with Agnes so you tried to push aside these thoughts.
Agnes was a really sweet person, she was attentive all the time you were there with her, if you had a question on how much of something you had to add she would explain you carefully, step by step, her perfume was really sweet you liked the vanilla smell that came from her.
“Honey you have some, let me help you” First she gestured to your face and when you try to clean whatever it was in your face Agnes laughed because you had just spread more the flour in your face, so she came closer to you, and with a napkin on her left hand she softly removed the flour off your face, her touch was so delicate, you wanted to stay like that a little bit more, but you quickly thought about Wanda, so you quickly separated yourself from Agnes and kept cleaning the kitchen island.
Agatha pouted a little, she would have liked to keep caressing your face, but she wouldn’t do it if you were uncomfortable about it.
You had a lot of fun with her and you enjoyed your time with Agnes, she was hilarious, you felt happy here with her, she made you feel good and you liked the feeling.
The older woman put the cookies in the oven and when she closed it, she went back to help you put everything you had used in the correct place.
“Can I put some music?” You asked shyly
“Of course, darling” She answered you and you happily went to turn the stereo on, the music started and it was your favorite song playing, so felt happier, at home you didn´t listen music at all, or did you? You couldn’t even tell, not again the thoughts.
“Hey doll would you like to do something else while the cookies are ready?” She asked you because she saw the distressed expression on your face, she just wanted you to be busy with something else.
“Yes” You blurted out, you didn’t need to think twice.
“We can play a boardgame, would you like that angel?” You nodded and felt your heart melt at the endearment, it felt so different, the way Wanda used to call you scared you, and you didn’t even know why.
You saw that Agnes went upstairs and minutes later she came back with a boardgame, you helped her placed everything on the living room´s table and when finally everything was placed and you had your tokens you started to play, it was awesome, Agnes had always a funny remark to say, you couldn’t stop laughing at her comments, you really enjoyed playing the game with Agnes, you were at peace, you felt inner peace, you didn’t feel like you needed to stay away from her like the way you felt with Wanda, you felt genuinely happy here with Agnes and you loved the feeling.
You played with her many rounds until you heard the alarm Agnes had set thirty minutes ago and you and her stood up from your sits to go for the cookies.
She took the cookies out of the oven and she placed them on the kitchen counter to make them cool a little, they looked really great and they smelled delicious.
“These look awesome Agnes” You said to her while pointing at the cookies with the pretty different shapes.
“That´s because you helped me, that´s why they look so good sweetheart” You couldn’t help but feel a little shy, you smiled at her biting your lip a little, you waited some minutes until she told you could start to eat them now that they weren’t too hot.
You were excited and you took one in your hand you were about to start eating the cookie you were grabbing in your hand but you heard a harsh knock on Agnes´ door.
You and Agnes frowned, who could it be? You saw how Agnes burrowed her eyebrows and she gestured you with her hand to wait for her, you understood and she went to answer the door
When she opened the door, you heard an angry Wanda and at the sound of her furious tone you instantly tensed in your seat.
“Where´s y/n?” You heard Wanda asking in an angry tone, fear took over you, you knew she wasn’t happy she was mad, really mad, maybe it hadn’t been a good idea to come into Agnes´ house, you started to regret your decision.
“Calm down darling, she´s here with me, we baked some cookies” You were too scared to even turn around when you heard quickly steps getting closer to you.
“What are you doing here?” You heard Wanda´s voice really close to you and you tensed more.
“I just, I helped Agnes to bake cookies” You said in a fearful tone, why were you so afraid of her?
“But you could have baked them all by yourself at home, you could have waited for me to arrive home and we could have baked them, you didn’t need to come here” You didn’t know what do or what to say, you just stared at the table in front of you.
“Oh darling, why are you so angry, I´m pretty sure she just wanted to get some fresh air, we haven’t seen her outside in days” Agnes said I a light tone, but when you heard she had said days, you lifted your head to look at your wife and you saw how her eyes went wide.
“Where´s your ring?” She asked you in a harsh tone changing the topic.
“I took it off so it didn’t get stained” You quickly said to her, you didn’t know where the courage had come out.
“Where is it?” She asked you again.
“It´s here darling I put it in a small box so she didn’t lose it” You saw how Agnes went for the small box and she took the ring out of it, she was giving it to you but Wanda quickly took it from her hand, she took it And you saw how Agnes burrowed her brows.
Wanda stretched her hand out to you with the ring on her hand and you got confused.
“Put it back” Wanda demanded, Agatha felt her blood boiling, how could she treated you like that? You deserved more, but she had to wait, she couldn’t risk it, she had to think carefully what to do next so Wanda didn’t hurt you, or mess with your mind again.
You were doubting, she was your wife yes, but she didn’t have to talk to you like that, you slowly took the ring from her hand and put it back on your finger.
“Let´s go” She said and started to walk towards the door, you turned your head to look at Agnes, and she saw the fear and doubt in your eyes.
“It´s alright doll, you have to go, don´t be afraid” She told you and that made you feel better, you nodded and she gave you a quick squeeze to your hand.
The love we share
Wanda and you arrived to your house and after you entered you flinched when Wanda slammed the door.
“Why did you go outside?” Wanda demanded to know; you didn’t want to turn yourself around to see her angry face.
“Why did you go outside?” You heard asking again.
“I just wanted to! I can´t stand being here all the time” You blurted out
“But we go outside! You can go outside when I´m here with you!” She answered back
“Bu why can’t I go outside alone?” You started to raise your voice a little, you didn’t understand why she was acting like this
“Just look at what you did today, you went to Agnes´ house and you even took your ring off!” She was being irrational.
“I didn’t do anything! I just talk to you, you don´t let me talk to anyone else anymore”
“How do you remember that?” Wanda quickly inquired.
“What? What do you mean? What are you implying?” You started to question and you saw how Wanda´s expression changed, that scared you a lot.
“I´m sorry printsessa, I didn’t want to scare you, I just, I´m worried about you” Wanda started to walk slowly and her sudden change of behavior made you fear her.
“Can I give you a hug?” You didn’t want to, you knew she was thinking something, you really didn´t want to let her hug you, there was something off, you just knew, unconsciously you stepped back
“Please my love I just want to hug you, like I always do” She started to walk faster towards you and you just felt the need to run.
You started to run towards your room but she used her magic to stop you from going upstairs.
“I´m really sorry my love, I can´t let you go, you´re mine, I´m only doing this to you because I love you”
“Wanda, please you don´t have to, this is not love, you don´t-“
“That´s not true! I love you; I DO love you, never said the contrary!” Wanda yelled at you making you close your eyes, you were trembling, at this point you were sure she had been the one messing and changing your thoughts.
“Please, Wanda you´re hurting me!” You squinted, it hurt, it hurt physically and mentally, you couldn’t keep with this.
“I´m sorry, I´m really sorry my love, I have to, If I don´t do it, you´ll get away from me, and I can´t let that happen, not again” She had tears in her eyes and you didn’t know why, you were the one who was in pain
“I swear to you, I won´t go away from you, I swear it, just please don´t do this again” You were pleading but she didn’t listen, Wanda came closer to you and she pressed her fingers against your temple, and once again Wanda caught your unconscious body against her.
“I´m really sorry for this printsessa, but I don´t want to lose you again” She whispered into your ear.
And I’ve lost my light
That night you dreamt of a different place from this one, you saw many people you couldn’t recognize, a tall blonde man who smiled at you kindly, a red-head woman hugging you and telling you that everything was going to be okay, a man with a serious expression and a metal arm saying comforting words to you, you couldn’t tell who they were but all of them seemed concerned they were worried, but why?
After that you started to had nightmares, there was a war, a big man, many people fighting against some type of creatures, and then you saw Wanda her eyes glowing red she was using her power to lift something big, but also you saw her crying over someone, that was really blurry, she was holding someone on the ground and then you didn’t see anything more.
When you woke up again, you were surprised you remembered everything that had happened the day before, how could it be? This time you remember what Wanda had done to you, how she had used magic on you, it had been real, everything she had done was real, now you were aware, Wanda had been using her powers to erase some events and things that had happened.
You were relieved that Wanda wasn’t in the bed with you, there was another piece of paper on the nightstand and you quickly took it.
-I’m going out for work printsessa, I hope you slept well, I have a surprise for you, we can go outside if you want when I arrive home, love you-
Her small letter made you feel angry, how could she do this?
What caught your attention was the ring on your finger, she hadn’t taken the ring off your hand, but what surprised you was that the little diamond wasn’t white anymore, now it was completely purple, you thought about whether it was a good idea taking it off or not, but in the end you did it and left it on the nightstand.
You started to be more scared, now that you were sure Wanda was manipulating your thoughts so that you didn’t remember what she had done to you, you started to doubt more about her, what else had she changed in your mind? What was this place? Why where you here? What had she done to you? You couldn’t even remember more about your life. You needed to calm down a little, if you think about it, Wanda wouldn’t be back until noon, you didn’t know where she really went and you really didn’t care, you just needed to get out of this place, you couldn’t take it anymore, you used to love Wanda you were sure about it, even if you couldn’t remember you were sure you used to had something beautiful, what you and her used to have was like a dream, but now it had turned into a nightmare for you.
You really wanted to take a bath, but you didn’t even feel safe in your own house, there was no one else who could help you, everyone here seemed to live just to please Wanda, no one dare to contradict her, as if everybody was scared of her.
You went downstairs, you had the same clothes of yesterday, you weren’t even sure if it had been yesterday or not, did you even have a phone? You didn’t know, you were sure if you had one Wanda wouldn’t even let you use it.
The only important thing you needed to do was to get out of this house as possible as you could, running to the front door you took the doorknob to open the door.
“Damn it” You cursed under your breath, why was the door locked? Where were the keys? You started to look for them, but they weren’t anywhere, you didn’t find them on the bookshelf, they weren’t on the table, they weren’t on the kitchen on counter, not even in your drawers of your room.
Wanda had locked you in your own house, how could she have done that? You couldn’t believe it, why would she do that? You were terrified, this wasn’t supposed to happen, maybe she had just locked the front door, so you went to the back door of your backyard to try to get out.
“Dam it, it´s closed too” You hit with your palm the door, this wasn’t fair, you needed to get out of here, Wanda knew you would try to go out so she did this, what else could you do?
The windows! You quickly went to look for the windows in the first floor but they were closed and even if you tried using all of your strength you couldn’t open them, this was wrong, this was all wrong.
Going upstairs to check on the windows you noticed they were locked as well as the ones in the first floor, when did Wanda had the time to lock them like this? How had she done this? What if she had used her magic to lock them? You were feeling desperate you really needed to get out of here, but how?
You´ll have to break a window, it was the only thing you could do at this point if you wanted to get out of this prison.
You took some of the decorative medium size rocks that were around a potted plant, you didn’t need to think twice your next moves, so you threw the rocks aggressively against the window and you cover your face when it crashed against the big window, pieces of glass went flying and when the crashing sound you turned yourself to look at the now broken window, you smiled at the sight now you could be free from this house, you didn’t want to hurt yourself so you took your jacket off and placed it on the edges of the window so that you wouldn’t cut yourself, after making sure that all the sharp edges were covered, a little insecure you pressed your hands on the edge of it, this was not the time to be scared, you needed to do this.
Taking a deep breath you pushed yourself to be able to jump over the window of the first floor, half of your body had already passed but you didn’t notice there were some sharp edges at the sides of the table until you felt an awful pain on your left hand and arm, you tried to get out faster but your foot got stuck a little and a piece of glass teared part of your jeans, it got to your skin and you hissed, the pain was awful but you needed to get out of this.
You fell onto the grass and grunted a little, you would have liked to just lay there a little bit more, you felt exhausted but you needed to keep going.
“y/n? Oh god, what happened to you darling?” You heard Agnes´ worried voice, lifting your head to look at her she saw your tired eyes and the state you were in, she felt really guilty, she should have done something to help you, Agnes stretched her hands to help you stand and you gladly accepted them, she carefully took your hands carefully not to hurt you more.
“What happened sweetheart?” Agnes saw the broken window and some pieces of glass were covered in some blood and her heart jumped.
“y/n doll are you hurt? Let me see” The woman in front of you softly took your face in her hands looking for wounds on your face, you could see how upset she was, the worry in her eyes and the troubled expression she had, her eyes were so pretty and you felt a warm feeling growing inside your chest.
Stop, you thought, this was not the time for that, not now.
“I´m alright Agnes, I´m not hurt, you need to help me, Wanda locked me inside the house and I had to break the window to get out” You blurted out and you saw how Agnes clenched her jaw in ager, you couldn’t take it anymore and started to cry, you were desperate, you just wanted Wanda to stop, why couldn’t she just let you go? You threw yourself into Agnes´ arms and she carefully hugged you back, your sobs were breaking her heart, it had taken some time to understand what was going on with you and Wanda, at first when she arrived at Westview because of Wanda´s magic and she saw you, she just thought you weren’t having a great day, but your confused stare at what was supposed to be your house raised her suspicions, then the way she saw how Wanda dragged you to different places with harsh grip on you or the way she talked to you when someone else got near to you to start a nice conversation, she knew what had happened to Wanda, but she didn’t knew anything about you, she didn’t know why Wanda had brought you here but she felt awful for you, your constant tired and sad look on your eyes, the way you would always look down at the ground, not even daring to look at Wanda, what had she done to you? Why did you look so scared of her? Agatha started to suspect there was something more going on between you and her, because sometimes you didn’t even get out of your house for days, the first time that she remembered that happening was two weeks after she had arrived for the first time.
All of you were in one of Dottie´s meeting, during the meeting you had been sitting next to Wanda all the time, with her hand on your waist and you even looked as if you were afraid to move, from time to time she kissed your cheek and you just stayed there, tensed the entire time, she had wanted to do something to make you feel a little less tense, maybe talk to you or made you laugh but Wanda didn’t let you alone until she found the perfect opportunity, when the meeting was over everyone dispersed and went to talk with different people some women were chatting with the others and she saw how Wanda told you something in your ear and you just nodded looking at the ground, then Agatha saw how you walked to the deckchairs and you sat down in one of them she followed you to talk a little with you, when she got near you, she saw how you just were staring at the water not even moving at all, and she frowned, why were you always so quiet?
“Hi doll, are you bored?” She asked you sitting next to you in the other chair, she saw the way you jumped a little at the sudden voice of hers.
“Hi Agnes” You shyly smiled and gave her a quick glance to her, turning your head quickly to look at the water again.
“I´m just a little bored, I would like to go now, but Wanda keeps talking to Dottie” You admitted to her, in that moment she frowned why wouldn’t just leave then? Maybe you didn’t want to go alone, she thought
“What if I accompany you to your house?” She kindly asked you and she saw how your eyes lit up for a moment.
“That would be great, but I have to ask Wanda first” The blue-eyed woman saw the way you thought about it for a moment and she nodded, you were Wanda´s wife after all.
“I´m going to ask her, wait here” You kindly smiled at her and she nodded again at you, she saw how you stood up from the chair but what disconcerted her was the way you walked towards your wife, as if you were scared of getting too close to her, she saw the way you hesitate to touch her arm, when you finally did it, you never dare to look her in the eyes, you just stared at the glass Wanda was holding, Agatha knew there was something wrong, why would you be afraid of your own wife? She saw the way your lips almost trembled to her while you spoke and when you stopped talking to her she saw Wanda smiled at you and how she hugged you, you didn’t return the hug you just stayed still, after separating from you Wanda said something to Dottie and your wife took your hand to start walking towards her, when Agatha saw your face again she could swear you were scared, Wanda and you walked until you were standing in front of her.
“Thank you so much for offering to take my wife home, but I will take her home, you shouldn’t have to worry, I was almost finished, but thank you for the offer, right y/n?”
Agatha saw the way you quickly nodded and you didn’t even dare to lift your head to look at her.
“It was good to be here, but we´re leaving” Wanda was smiling at her but she couldn’t shake the strange feeling about her.
After that day she didn’t saw you for four days in a row, she saw how Wanda came out of your house and entered again hours later, the fourth day Agatha hadn’t seen you she decided to ask Wanda what was going on, so when she was in her garden and she saw that Wanda had arrived to your house she quickly went to say hi to Wanda.
“Hey darlin! I hope you´re enjoying your day at all, isn’t y/n with you? I haven’t seen her in a while” Agatha asked with a smile on her face, her expression didn’t match with the real emotions she was feeling, Wanda turned herself slowly from her front door and walked towards her, her annoyed expression changed into a fake smile just in the nick of time.
“Oh hi Agnes, I´m enjoying my day yes, I was just going to pass a lovely evening with my wife, she´s been feeling a little under the weather, that´s why you haven’t seen her, she decided to stay at home, but don´t worry, she´s getting better, so you don´t have to worry about her” And with that Wanda went back to her door and entered to your house.
The next day she saw you, at the center of the town, Agatha had the unsettling feeling that there was something else behind all of this, you were smiling and letting Wanda hug you as if nothing had happened days ago, you were holding hands with her and this time, you seemed to be happier, but Agatha had the feeling that was not the real way you were feeling inside.
And now that she was seeing you here, holding your trembling body against her she knew she had to help you, she couldn’t keep seeing you suffering.
Agatha had to do something, it had been so wrong to wait to do something, now you were here physically hurt because Wanda had locked you in your own house, your body was shaking with fear, this time she wouldn’t let that Wanda messed with your head again, not again.
“You´re safe with me doll, it´s alright, I won´t let Wanda get near you again, she won´t ever hurt you again” She was holding you tightly against her and for the first time you felt safe, you just wanted all of this suffering to end.
She took your hands in her and looked at you straight in your eyes, your beautiful eyes were red from all the crying, she needed you to explain things to you first, but she needed to do it quickly before Wanda came looking for you again.
“You´ll be fine” You heard Agnes say to you and she took your hand in hers waiting for you to walk, she guided you to the back door of her house and you followed her, she was holding you hand with a soft grip on yours, it felt so different as the way Wanda grasped your hand.
Once I ran to you
Agnes guided you inside her house and once again you felt at peace, you didn’t feel tense or afraid here with Agnes, the older woman made you feel safe.
“Sweetheart first I need to clean these wounds, would you let me?” You nodded and she made you sit in her couch.
Agatha couldn’t stand seeing you this way, you looked so broken, she knew there was more behind this, she wanted to make you smile, the times you had shared with her, the times you didn’t remember because she was sure Wanda messed with your memories, she was happy that you had asked her for help, she was sure that the spell she had put in your ring the day before had helped you, that spell at least helped you a little so that Wanda didn’t altered your memories, she wanted to tell you everything, but first she needed to take care of your cuts.
“I´ll be back quickly, I need to get some alcohol and cotton gauzes” She caressed your face a little before going to her bathroom, for what she needed.
You started to relax a little in here, you didn’t feel any pressure, it was good to be here with her.
You her quick steps coming closer to you and the sound of her rushed steps didn’t scare you as how Wada´s had made you feel when she came to your side demanding to know what you were doing with Agnes.
“Angel, let me see the cuts, I´ll be as gentle as possible, I don´t want to hurt you more than you already are” You felt touched by her words, so you showed her your arm and your hand, those were the ones that hurt the most, she cleaned the cuts and applied alcohol on them, then she put the cotton gauze and she did the same with the cuts in your leg, you really liked her gentle touch against your skin, it felt so nice to know that she didn’t want to hurt you, when she finished she placed everything in the small table in the living room and looked at you.
You saw how she brought her hand to your face and she softly caressed your cheek, unconsciously you lent into her touch, it was so nice to feel how she treated you with such delicacy, you were not expecting when she suddenly knelt in front of you, her hand were resting carefully in your knees and she was looking at you with almost pleading eyes.
“Doll I need to tell you the truth, but I promise you that you don’t need to be afraid, I just want to help you get away from this, you deserve so much more and I can´t let Wanda keep doing this to you” You said yes with your head and she took a deep breath and closed her eyes before speaking again.
“My real name´s Agatha Harkness” You had thought she was joking but when you saw the serious look on her face you realized, she wasn’t lying.
“I´m a witch, at first I came here, because I felt Wanda´s magic and I had wanted her powers, but my plans changed, I´m not interested in her powers anymore, I just want to help you, I can´t stand seeing the way you´re suffering” She felt some tears threatening to fall at the corner of her eyes, when Agatha saw that you weren’t saying anything and that you just stared at her with a blank expression on your face she started to fear the worst, she didn’t want to scare you, she needed to tell you the truth.
“Doll, I´m sorry I didn’t tell you this before, but please you don´t need to be afraid of me, I don´t want to hurt you, I just want to help you, I put a spell on your ring yesterday so that Wanda´s magic didn’t affected you, I was sure she was going use her magic on you, and before she took you back to your home days ago I knew she would do it, so I planned on coming to see you but in these two days she didn’t leave your house, she was constantly there until now, I saw she had gone out and I decided to go see you but then I heard a loud crash and when I arrived at your house you were laying on the ground that´s when I-“ She didn’t finish her sentence because you had hugged her, you passed your arms around her shoulders and when she felt how close you had pulled yourself to her she passed her arms around your waist, you started to sob again and she quickly removed a little from you to take your face in her hands and with her fingers she wiped the tears away from your face.
“You really did that to the ring?” You asked between sobs but with a smile on your face, you were amazed, thanks to her you got the chance to go out of that house, she nodded and you hugged her again.
“Thank you so much, you don´t know how that helped me, thanks to you I can remember the day you and I made cookies, you don´t know how much I love that memory, I can´t remember a lot of things but I can remember this and it makes me so happy that you did that for me”
“You don´t need to thank me sweetheart I want to help you, I´m so sorry I didn’t do anything before to help you, I tried to wake you up before but Wanda´s magic is too strong, her magic is tied to her emotions and when she´s angry her magic becomes stronger, I don´t know how is that even possible, but I assure you Wanda won´t hurt you again” She took your hands in your and gave them a soft squeeze to them, you nodded and closed your eyes, Agatha pressed her forehead against yours and you felt happy, you felt really happy that you had someone who wanted to help you.
“We need to go sweetheart; we need to leave as fast as possible” You whispered a small “yes” and the two of you stood up.
“Wait I´ll give something to cover yourself sweetheart, it´s could outside” You felt a warm feeling growing inside your chest and when Agatha came back with one of her jackets, she helped you to put on the jacket.
“Thank you” You said shyly and she smiled, you were so beautiful, you deserved to smile and be happy.
“Let´s go darling” Agatha took your hand in hers and she guided you to the door, the blue-eyed woman held the door open for you and she let you go out first, you really loved this gesture of her.
“We need to hurry darling; I don´t know if she can feel you or not, I promise I won´t let her get near you again” Agatha said to you and she started to guide you towards the other side of the street.
“We will have to go towards the other direction” You nodded and the two of you walked down the street.
This tainted love you’ve given
After what felt hours of walking you finally arrived to the limits of the town and you felt horrified when you saw the people who were frozen on the street.
“What´s all of this?” You asked Agatha while covering your mouth, you couldn’t believe what you were watching.
“I didn’t want to have this conversation with you, I don´t want you to feel scared, but now that you´re seeing all of this, it´s necessary that you know the truth” The two of you stopped walking and she turned herself to look at you.
“This place is an illusion, Wanda created all of this, she´s using her power to make all of these people do what she wants, they can´t help but do everything what Wanda says, these people are frozen because Wanda´s not here, It doesn’t affect me because her magic isn’t able to affect me” She said and you quickly hugged her, it was awful what Wanda was doing.
“I´m really sorry you had to see this sweetheart” Agatha pulled you closer to her body and she softly stroked your hair.
“We need to keep going darling, we´re almost outside” She was right you could almost feel the freedom.
Agatha grabbed your hand again and the two of you walked towards the entrance, when you were close enough you saw something weird in front of you and you turned your head to give Agatha a questioning look.
“This is the magical field that covers Westview, doll, I want you to know that once we cross this field, all the memories Wanda locked inside your mind, you will be able to remember all of these, I know you´re strong enough to handle them, but I will be with you all the time alright?” You were scared you were going to remember everything you couldn’t and that scared you a lot, but you knew Agatha wasn’t lying she made you feel protected and you trusted her.
“Alright, I´m ready” You said to her with confidence, you really wanted to go away from this place.
You felt her hand squeezing your and she nodded to you, you and her walked at the same time and while you started to cross the magical field, you felt some pressure over you, but when you touched the other side the uncomfortable weight on you disappeared, the next thing you knew, a bunch of memories of your real life came to your mind.
You saw your old life back in the Avengers compound, the way your family had vanished into thin air, how Natasha had died for the soul stone, the battle against Thanos, how Tony had died for all of you, you remembered every single thing Wanda had blocked from you.
You also remembered how Wanda had cheated on you with Vision, the way you had felt when you saw her kissing the synthezoid.
You remembered what had happened that day, everything was clear now, she had proposed to you years ago, she used to be a loving and caring girlfriend, but that had been years ago, she used to loved you and you used to love her, you had thought you would be sharing your life with her, years ago she told you how much one day she would love to live with you in a beautiful house of two floors in a really pretty neighborhood, she had sworn to you that she would make everything to protect you from everything and that she would make you happy, but that day when she broke every one of her promises you gave her the ring back, she had pleaded you not to leave her, she had begged you many times to make you stayed with her but you didn’t accept it, and then everything happened so quickly, you didn’t even got time to mourn on your feelings, earth was attacked and after that you had just lost all of your family.
“Are you alright doll?” You heard Agatha asking you, you blinked many times and you noticed tears streaming down your face, you felt Agatha pulling you closer to her and once again you let yourself express all of your pain by crying into her chest, Agatha soothed you and stroked your hair, now that you were finally outside she could see your thoughts and she felt the same pain you were feeling, you deserve to be happy and she was going to make sure of that.
Tainted love
“Stay away from her” You jumped at Wanda´s voice, there was that accent, you knew there was something missing when she talked to you inside Westview, and now you realized it had been her accent.
“No, you stay away from her” Agatha placed herself in front of you
“Who do you think you are?” You could see Wanda´s eyes glowing red just as well as her hands, for a moment you feared the worst, but when you saw Agatha´s hands glowing purple, you sighed feeling relieved.
“You´re hurting her Wanda, can´t you see it? this is not healthy" Agatha said to Wanda
“That’s not true! I’m doing this for us, I need her and she needs me! We are meant to be together” Wanda yelled and it made you feel angry, she was hurting you and you were exhausted, you couldn’t believe what she was saying.
“You need to stop Wanda!” You yelled back at her, you placed yourself next to Agatha and all of the anger started to come out of you.
“You hurt me! You made me feel awful, you were manipulating my memories, you used you Magic to make me believe a false life!” You were gesturing at her and you saw how her hands stopped glowing red.
“I love you!” She yelled and you bitterly laughed at that, you wiped some tears that had fallen down your face and you felt Agatha’s hand caressing softly your back, that made you feel better.
“That’s not true Wanda, you don’t love me, this is not love, love is not supposed to be painful, love is not supposed to make you feel exhausted, love is not supposed to scare you, you don’t love me and I don’t lo-” You were cut off by the read-head
“That’s not true! You love me just as much as I love you! I did this all for us, I did all of this for you, this is our dream, the one we share-”
“You kidnapped me Wanda! You took me away from my home! You kidnapped me and brought me here! That’s not love!” You interrupted her
“That’s not true, that was not your home, this is our home, we can go back to it, we can live peacefully we can go back to our amazing life and forget that all if this ever happened” Wanda started to walk slowly towards you and before she could touch your arm you quickly stepped back.
“Don’t touch me!” You quickly said and Agatha placed herself in front of you.
“You heard her Wanda, you better back off” You saw Wanda’s expression changed into a really angry one
“I won’t repeat myself y/n you better come with me; I love you” You couldn’t understand why Wanda kept saying the same.
“No, I won’t go back to you, you just made me feel awful, you made me feel exhausted, you locked me in that house, YOU DON’T LOVE ME”
“We are married” she quickly said.
“That’s not true, you know that’s not true, we were going to get married years ago but you cheated on me”
You argued back and you saw the way Wanda flinched at the mention of what she had done.
“It was a mistake, I really love you, I don’t want to lose you again, please, you’re breaking my heart, I need you” Wanda knelt in front you she was holding her arms in the air towards you, she was sobbing in front of you, but this time she couldn’t manipulate you, not anymore, Agatha looked at you and she smiled at you, her smile was comforting, she made you feel safe and now that you could finally remember every single moment you had interacted with her inside Westview, you realized that was how love was supposed to feel.
Now I know I’ve got to
Run away, I’ve got to
Get away
You came a little closer to Wanda and you knelt in front of her, Agatha was next to you making sure Wanda wouldn’t do anything to you.
“I’m sorry Wanda, but I won’t go back to you, you don’t love me and I don’t love you, you have to accept that, I can’t be with you, this is not love, what we used to have years ago is over, you have to let it go” You said looking into her green eyes, you didn’t recognize the old Wanda, the person in front of her was full of rage and hatred, you couldn’t blame her at all, she had lost everyone but, this was not fair to you, she was hurting you and you didn’t deserve it, you didn’t feel the same for her.
“Love is supposed to make you feel happy, as if you’re floating on air, love makes you feel safe and protected, love makes you keep going, it doesn’t stop you” Looking back at Agatha she smiled at you and you smiled back at her, she had risked herself to help you get out of it, and you knew that was how love was supposed to be, with Agatha you were sure you could have it, a real love.
“So, you fell in love with her?” Wanda’s voice was louder and you could hear her accent coming back, this time it was more present than ever, you could tell she was really mad, her hands forming into fists and her eyes glowing red in anger, she hastily stood up from the ground and Agatha pulled you closer to her.
“Answer me! Is she the reason you’re leaving me?” You saw Wanda’s jaw clenching and her left eye twitching a little
“She’s leaving you because you just inflict pain into her heart, Wanda you’ve been messing with her mind! She was feeling anxious she didn’t know what day it was, you held her captive inside a place she didn’t want to be, you just made her suffer, she doesn’t deserve this, you’re hurting her, why can’t you understand?”
Agatha was shocked at how Wanda couldn’t see what was the real problem.
“That’s not true, you’re the one who is manipulating her, you’re a liar, you’re not even who you said you were” Wanda kept talking and you felt desperate
“Stop, just stop, I don’t want to listen to you anymore” You said to Wanda while holding your hands in the air, you pressed your fingers against your temple, a headache started to form and it felt awful, you closed your eyes and you put more pressure of your fingers into your temple.
Agatha came closer to you to softly touch your arm.
“Are you alright sweetheart?” You heard Agatha asking you.
“Don’t call her like that, you don’t have the right, she’s mine, and she will just be mine” Wanda had started to come closer to the two of you.
“Don’t come closer Wanda” you heard the blue-eyed woman warned Wanda.
“What? Do you think I’m afraid of you?” Wanda asked with a mocking tone
“Oh dear, I could easily destroy you with a flick of my hand” the dark-haired woman next to you scoffed, you could almost sense the smirk Agatha had on her face.
“Stop right there” Those were new voices; you lifted your head to see who were they and you saw many soldiers pointing their guns at the three of you.
“Not you again, not this time” The red-head started to move her hands in the air and she made all of the soldiers point to the sky, but the moment you felt you couldn’t move, you realized she was using her magic on you as well.
“Y/n!” You heard Agatha calling your name, purple magic enveloped you and you felt yourself being released, she used her magic to stop you from falling harshly against the ground.
“You need to stop trying to take her, she doesn’t want to be with you, y/n doesn’t need you!”
“That’s not true! She needs me just as much as I need her, I love her-
"STOP!” You snapped and didn’t realize the wave of magic coming from your body, your magic was f/c and when you opened your eyes again you saw Wanda covered in a new different magic, you saw your hands and your eyes widened when you realized it was you the one who this time stopped her from moving.
You gasped and this time you saw all the soldiers on the ground, they were covered with your magic too and you started to panic a little, but when you felt Agatha’s hand on your shoulders you started to relax a little.
“It’s alright sweetheart, I know you can do it, focus on what you’re feeling, don’t let the fear consume you”
Slowly you nodded and focused on what you wanted, you wanted the soldiers to go away, so you moved your hand and when you heard noised this time you opened your eyes to see all of them started to walk away from where they had coming.
“I’m so proud of you darling, you did it amazing, I will make sure they don’t come again” She caressed your cheek and you smiled at her, she stayed with you making sure no one else came to where you were.
“You think you she loves you y/n?” You heard Wanda’s laugh and turned your head to look at herk kneeling on the ground with her hands behind her back and all of your magic over her, she didn’t stop laughing for some minutes, you just couldn’t believe what was happening to Wanda.
“No one will ever love you the way I do” Wanda said back to you when she stopped laughing, you looked straight into her eyes and the only things you could see in them was madness, you felt bad for her for a minute, you knew what she had passed through but all the things she made you passed through as well, you even doubt your own sanity, you couldn’t forgive this, she had kidnapped you and she had messed with your mind, you didn’t even know how many time you were inside with her.
“You don’t love me Wanda, this is an obsession Wanda what happened-
"What happened was a mistake, let me make things right this time printsessa, I really love you, you’re the love of my life! I need you!” She begged you again, but you this time you weren’t going to fall for it, not anymore, you closed your eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before speaking again.
“You don’t really want any more from me, to make things right, Wanda, you can’t make things right, this is messed up, not only you hurt me, but you’re hurting thousands of people, let them be free, let me be free Wanda, please, I want to be free” Tears started to fall down your face
“You need someone to hold you tight printsessa and I’m the one who can do that, I can-
"You can’t Wanda, you broke what we had years ago! You broke me, and there’s no way you can fix this! If you want to make things right, you’ll let me go with Agatha, if you love me, you’ll release me”
“I can’t do that printsessa, you’re mine, you’re just mine I won’t let her or anyone else take you away from me” You saw how Wanda’s eye’s started to glow red and you moved your hands to stop her hands from moving behind her back, she wasn’t going to use her magic on you again, not anymore.
“I’m not yours, I’m not yours, the problem is Wanda that you think love is to pray, but I’m sorry, I don’t pray that way, you won’t get to me again, I don’t love you” You whispered to her loud enough to hear you, Agatha took your hand in hers and you used your magic to pull Wanda back inside Westview.
“I will find you y/n and I will make you mine again, you belong to me” You heard her yelling and Agatha pulled you closer to her.
“I will come for the both of you and I will make you pay for taking y/n away from me, you will pay and I will make sure of that” Wanda tried to break free from your magical ties but you didn’t let her.
“You can’t get away from me y/n I will always be with you and no matter what I will find you-”
Finally, you put Wanda inside the town and Agatha started to make movements with her hands, a purple mist covered the entirety of the town, the magical field Wanda had created was replaced by Agatha’s purple magic.
“This will only keep her inside for some weeks, maybe some months until she realizes how to get out from this, I trapped her inside Westview but this won’t last forever doll” You felt the older woman’s hands taking your face in her hands.
“I’m not afraid” You answered to her and you saw a proud smile on her face
“I know you’re not afraid, you’re so strong and brave, I will be with you, no matter what, I will be with you, I know you can protect yourself but I will protect you too, and when the time Wanda comes for us, I will be by your side, she won’t take you again doll, I promise”
You felt safe with her, she made you feel alright and you couldn’t help yourself, you took her face in your hands and slowly leant into her, Agatha passed her hands around your waist and she pulled your body close to hers, you felt her soft touch on you and that made your heart melt, this is how love is supposed to feel, you knew it, you presses your lips against hers, she captured your soft lips, it was a soft but needy kiss, she needed to feel you and you needed to know she was there for you, you needed to know this was real.
When the two of you broke the kiss, she pressed her forehead against yours her hands never leaving your sides.
“I know it will take a time for you to get used to this, but I promise I won’t hold you back, I want to make sure you’re alright, I want the best for you y/n” You trusted her, you knee she was saying the truth, and you were grateful with her, without her help you wouldn’t have been able to get out of your prison.
“I believe you Agatha, I want to be with you, I know you will help me to heal” You whispered to her and she smiled, she hugged you again, the feeling of your body against her made her feel alive and you felt the same, you weren’t free at all from Wanda, but you knew that Agatha would there for you to help you.
You felt something bothering in your pocket, there was something in it and when you pulled your hand inside it you felt shivers down your spine, pulling out the small piece of metal you saw it was the ring Wanda gave to you because of your “marriage” you were Wanda had been the one who placed it in your pocket with her magic, you eyed it for a minute before throwing it against the grass.
“We have to go doll” She was right, you had to go now.
Taking your hand into hers, Agatha guided you towards the forest, you didn’t know where you were going but you were sure that Agatha would make everything, she could to protect you.
The two of you walked through the forest, between the tall pines, the sound of some branches breaking because you stepped on them was some of the only sounds you could hear, the night was a little cold and from time to time you still feel a little afraid, but when you felt Agatha’s hand softly squeezing you hand to reassure she was there and she wasn’t going anywhere made you feel strong.
You knew Wanda would come for you, you were sure she would do everything she could to find you, but you were sure you wouldn’t be alone this time, you weren’t afraid of her, she didn’t have that power over you anymore.
When Wanda comes for you, you were sure you were going to be prepared, just as Wanda wouldn’t let her take you, you were going to fight Wanda, you’re not afraid of her.
Now I’m gonna pack my things and go
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so like are we done with the idea that james is a victim of the internet harassment mob or whatever you guys like to call it when in reality no one like forced him to be part of the public eye again. he had multiple times to disengage but he threw himself head first into the spotlight with some half assed apology where he used his dead mom, illiterate dad, and like 293 mental illnesses that he was in the right to do a widdle plagiarism but it’s not his fault! it’s everyone else’s fault for not being nice to him about it!!! how dare these people bring these issues to the public not thinking how james would feel about it! like ppl are forgetting there was notable period of time james went off air entirely. and every time he’s jumped back it’s always attempts to paint himself as the victim.
like be real for a second if anyone was weaponizing the internet harassment machine it was james somerton. he knew what he was doing when he posted that note. he knew the shit his victims would get for having the crime of (checks notes) voicing out their issues with him. he knew there’s people out there who are foaming at their mouths to use anything they can get their hands on as a “gotcha!” at hbomberguy (right wing people yes, but don’t act like it’s just them i’ve seen plenty of lefties trying to prove they’re superior to harry). they don’t give a shit about james, not really. he’s the dude who hbomb did a “hit piece” (yes that’s a term i’ve seen people use) and that’s what matters.
not to mention the writing that’s also very clearly targeting nick who’s basically cut ties with him at this point. james pushed all the burden on nick by saying it’s their fault, actually. he’s one of the co-writers and everything going to shit was nick’s fault when they had the audacity to move. james is faultless! with james still trying to monetize stolen content on the blatant lie that he’s doing this for nick’s sake as a portfolio. acting as if nick isn’t an sentient human being who could upload their own content, as if nick would even want to be associated with james at this point. this isn’t a teenager being harassed for an honest mistake, this is a 35-year old con artist who’s stolen hundreds of thousands and peddled the most vile shit as actual history but realized he was in deep shit and weaponizes very serious mental health issues as a “i’m just a poor little gay baby!! my alter ego did it!!!”
for the record if you’re among the people who tried to wash down james’ crimes as “he just did plagiarism!! it wasn’t that bad of a crime!” fuck you, man. i’m not kidding.
the fact i’ve witnessed people whitewash his acts of racism, sexism, transphobia, homophobia, antisemitism and misogyny (in fact i’m probably still missing a few things here), and say he’s being harassed by the internet just because he stole articles makes it so clear they have no fucking idea what they’re talking about. his shit isn’t fucking erased just bc he realized that he has to handle the consequences. he’s grasping at anything he can at this point to make sure that even if he’s not coming back, he’s sure as hell trying to take anyone he fucking can down with him.
he doesn’t get a second chance to be a content creator at this point. he doesn’t get to show himself to do better. he needs to fucking leave. and if he tries to publicly make himself the victim then he better know that he’s going to get public backlash.
if anything situation proves to me that he can never be trusted with a public platform ever again because he will immediately guilt people into feeling sorry for him.
#i’m going to be bitchy about this for the record#james somerton#hbomberguy#the funniest option is if james fakes his death like a fourth time and someone takes a pic of him in like a burger king or something.#updated i’m not 100% sure on nicks pronouns but i’m using they them just in case#update 2: the way i was proven fucking right immediately after posting this. you people are not real.
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hey uh. if requests r open. would it b possible to request a follow up to that self-aware-twi fic. if not thats ok i just wanted u to know i havent stopped thinking about it since i read it. altered my brain chemistry, touch-starved twilight princess link my beloved, etc etc. ur writing is top-tier <3<3<3
I think the best part about this ask is - I've had this written since early January. I actually wrote part two as a birthday gift for a good friend of mine @glowyskull <33
So this is more just me finally posting it sfbgdfbgdb. it's also funny to think that the twilight fic is my most popular fic now considering how the self aware au really started as just a really guiltily self indulgent fic - something fun to write that I didn't think could get as big as it did on my blog. and I'm glad that you liked it so much <333 whimpery touch starved twilight princess link is just so AUGH love him so
[masterlist]
“Oh you’re finally wakin up then darlin’.”
“...hmm?”
“C’mon darlin’, you can’t have forgotten what happened earlier already? Can you? Your fever - cold isn’t that bad so you can't have…”
Who’s rambling… and why does it sound so familiar? Wait does that mean - is everything that happened earlier all real then, did link really crawl out of my tv just because he was lonely. Because I left him there, left him all on his own to rot in his own solitude.
“Link? You - that - everything was real then? All of it?”
“All of it darlin’, from how I got out to how I’m never gonna leave ya.”
“Huh..? I could’ve sworn that you didn’t even mention anything like that…”
“Mhm, well you’re ill and still a little out of it darlin’ so you probably just forgot, you did agree though.”
It does sound like something that I would agree to, I mean I’m the reason that he’s sentient. It would be cruel of me to throw him to the other wolves, he isn’t from here but besides even that, he isn’t from here. He doesn’t know how this world works, it would be worse than sending a dog to a shelter. It would be his death sentence for certain, and after all that I put him through for a simple pause in playing. The way he’s petting my hair like this though, it’s enough to simply just wash the rest of my worries away, if I could I would spend the rest of my life right here easily.
“About your illness though, do you have any red potion anywhere?”
“No, no things like that don’t exist here link and the painkillers I have aren’t worth moving for.”
“If you’re sure… I’ll go and get them for you the second you change your mind.”
“You don’t even know where I keep them.”
His hand paused at that, causing me to let out an involuntary whine. I couldn’t even think to stop it with how it slipped out instantly, which he seemed fond of. Cuddling me closer to his chest and resting his head on top of mine, with what felt like a giant smile on his face.
“I can look for them, It’s not like I won’t need to learn where everything is now that I’m living with ya… besides I’ve already put you through so much stress when you’re not well.”
“You didn’t mean to link, how could you have known I was sick?”
“...I don’t know - I just - it shouldn’t have been hard to know with how you looked when you opened the game. I’m sorry love I just wasn’t even thinking I just wanted to be out, but I should’ve been more considerate to you.”
With how silent he is in the game you could never have guessed how much he likes to ramble, it’s the second or third time it’s happened since he crawled out of the glas- the glass. Are his bandages holding up, he seems fine but he’s not from here, any infection could be deadly. He wouldn’t even see it coming with how much he’s fawning over my comfort right now.
“Link?” “Yes, darlin’?”
Oh wow, he - well he’s whipped already. Is it real love or has all that time trapped alone twisted him into this. I’d look into getting him therapy but… if he mentioned the truth then it would be a matter of seconds until he’d be diagnosed with something inaccurate. No one. No one at all would ever believe that a video game character actually broke out of their game - especially not someone like Link falling for an exhausted student like me.
“Are you feeling alright? You have so many cuts and wounds right now.”
“It’s nothing that’s worse than anything else I’ve ever had. They do feel more real though.”
“...real?”
“They feel like real wounds, not something that could be healed away in seconds and they’re just tiny scrapes.”He sounds so giddy as he’s talking about being hurt - it’s unnerving when he starts holding me even tighter when he’s saying it. I don’t think I’m ever going to be getting away from him ever again… if I wanted to. Why shouldn’t I take a chance at having a relationship though. He cares about me - he really does even if it’s unhinged - it would be so nice to come home to him, to be able to spoil him and be spoilt by him. Even being held like this feels so unreal, so impossible that I shouldn’t be here with him. So much so that I want to stay here and fall back asleep without any argument. Didn’t he even say he wanted to be my lover? Why look over a gift too closely?
#I waited to post it cause I wanted to get permission to post the fic#I dm bday fics to my friends lol#cause I'll use their name/ocs name instead of a stand in yk?#so this is the first posted of them#moss✦writes#yandere linked universe#linked universe#yandere link#yandere linked universe x reader#linked universe x reader#link x reader#lu twilight#self aware au#self aware loz#sentient au#linked universe twilight#queueueueueueueueueueueueueue
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