#yall these are canon because I said so

[caspinsoands0]

Okay everyone loves their beef boss and tomatohead as either really big bad Tomatohead and a incompetent beef boss or a just a pure hate for eachother friendship,

But I like my beef boss and tomatohead to be ex’s, old men, and very tired. Beef boss was friends with Tomatohead but got sour and bitter when Tomatohead started his own cult and tried to convert him. Beef boss gets all grumpy on everyone, explaining why he hates Tomatohead and why everyone doesn’t like him (he wasn’t in the foodie battalion and there isn’t any characters besides his crew that like him outside of his restaurant) and Tomatohead to be an actual nice dude with npd and he started the cult for validation but when he lost beef boss he got super upset and went more whacko and went all in with the whole turning people into tomatoes. That would explain why people like him compared to beef boss, because he’s just a good face, but he secretly wants to apologize to beef boss for freaking out on him but beef boss is so out of it and bitter that he won’t let go of it. Hence why epic always says that they’re enemies and friends, because deep down they don’t actually hate eachother but they’re so far into this rabbit hole and both are too stubborn to admit they’re wrong they keep themselves from solving their Pizza vs. Burger dispute.

DurrrPit angst for the win let’s get a highfive for sad old Fortnite men 😛😛😛

[pikinanouart]

Can we please have some o7 in the chat for the real MVP Martha?

Even if we all knew the outcome of their story, it still hurts!

(Don't mind me while I'm aggressively chopping onions.)

Becky not knowing that Martha's lover was Mr. Henderson is a funny surprise but I guess it makes sense, Martha wouldn't want her pupil to ask inappropriate question to her professor.

I still hope Becky figures it out and go into Operation Matchmaker.

[bvckbiter]

me going into the rr crit tag lately: perhaps you would be happier writing your own books

[thechaotichorselord]

Been thinking.

The Unwanted Guest AU is inspired by the Stanley Parable. It has a lot of the same concepts and is technically an alternate universe, but i want to be able to freely add different things to it. So in this case it’s both an AU and not an AU!

It’s my fellas! My silly guys! It’s not even close to canon, and that’s alright! I enjoy the canon story, and I enjoy what my brain ripped from the game. It’s mine to enjoy.

I want people to enjoy the story, so I’ll continue doing it. But since I want to make it even more of my own thing, I’m going to add some stuff that isn’t related to canon. I’ve been trying so, so hard to make it seem like it can fit with canon in some way, but nah. I’ve given up on that. It’s my stupid little story, and I’ll add all the doohickeys I want.

Thems the breaks or wtv (don’t mind that i popped out of my break to say this, lalala)

tldr; unwanted guest isn’t canon to tsp and i’ve finally accepted that so ima add more thingies to it (BUT I CONSIDER IT TO BE RELATED TO THE FANDOM ANYWAYS)

[ashpkat]

in my idealized version of the books (the Good timeline), jericho and constantine’s relationship is not the one aaron and calls relationship parallels — it’s constantine and joseph. in this essay i will *gets taken out by cassandra clare’s snipers*

[mr-aftons-rotting-pussy]

TRAGIC: beautiful william afton post suddenly unrebloggable after mentioning minor thing that doesnt fit canon characterization

[binglepringle]

I love Pinterest alignment charts, cause sometimes I find gems like this

[anxiously-sidequesting]

anyways seeing Duncan still with the Schism at the end left me like ☹️

[sege-h]

Its PPRIDE and its the FIRST EVER ARO VISIBILITY DAY, allowing me to unlock my powers to fire godzilla beams from my mouth and evaporate anyone that implies Sonic wouldnt save or try to save Shadow if he wasnt gay for him

WOULD YOU RESERVE LIFE SAVING TO YOUR ROMANTIC PARTNERS ONLY, AND LEAVE "ONLY" A FRIEND TO FALL FROM SPACE? BECAUSE THEYRE "JUST" A FRIEND?

PATHETIC

WEAK

IF I WERE SONIC ID SIMPLY SAVE EVERYONE WITH THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP ALONE--oh wait he already does that

😤

[andie-platonically]

not to make this a fandom thing but this is what people who say riz isnt canonically aroace sound like

"but the text never explicitly stated it!!!" hey, so that's actually what they tried to teach you in those english classes you barely passed 😁

[twodiamondhoes]

I have fic to read. I have fic to write. I have books on my shelf that are calling to me.

But someone on the other blog reminded me that Illyana was approximately the only person who didn't want Kitty to marry Piotr and I've been activated like a fucking sleeper agent. I've been forcing myself not to reread XMG all day I feel like I'm unraveling at the seams.

[meejijis]

I think people are still allowed to dislike anything and still have a right to outright say they just don't like said thing, have opinions and then move on with their life

[girlokwhatever]

i’d love making out w/ paige head canons 💕 like the ones u did with kate

paige bueckers x gf!reader making out hcs

༉‧₊˚°•*⁀➷✧༊*· paige bueckers and her gf making out,,

— one word: touchy.

- her hands are all over your body like she can’t even control herself

— she loves having you pressed flat against her, preferably on top because……

- she wants to touch your ass!

— it never starts innocent. she has a purpose and a plan

— she likes to take it slow, but she’s so fucking energetic it’s difficult

- it’s never slow.

— it actually gets so out of control your teeth will clash and she still doesn’t care

- she says it adds sexiness.

— passion, passion, passion!

— she definitely will slap your ass at least three times

- she loves it mostly because of the way you’ll moan into her mouth afterwards

- she also just loves your ass!

— you only spur her on which makes it even harder to stop if she’s late for practice or something

— she loves loves loves to bite down on your bottom lip

- i can’t explain it

— yall know she has her playlists…..

— always teases you through your underwear or whatever pants you’re wearing

- pulls away just to make fun of how wet you are like it isn’t her fault or something….

— she’s actually obsessed with the look of you trying to catch your breath..

- chest heaving, soft breaths that she can feel fanning over her face……. yeah.

— the first time the two of you ever made out she was literally shaking

- life-altering experience

— “i think my jaw is cramping paige”

- “we haven’t even been making out that long.”

- “it’s been over an hour.”

— she’ll pull your clothes off while simultaneously making out because she doesn’t have time to do them both separately

- she needs you right now.

— if she pulls away to say something she doesn’t even really pull away

- she’ll whisper it onto your lips

— “you’re gonna kill me.”

— she will make out in the middle of sex

- there’s literally nothing she’d rather do

— genuinely obsessed with tracing your spine idk

— “don’t go, please. i want more, paige..”

- “yeah? you want more?”

- this is how she discovered she’s never too busy for you

— best way to ease tension???? making out with you of course!

— if she’s under you….

- she’s grinding up into you.

— actually likes to make out with you while her hair is down because…

- she honestly loves when you pull it!

- WHO SAID THAT???

— definitely loves a good french kiss cause who doesn’t???

— “baby come back to bed..”

- “paige..”

- “get back in bed so i can kiss you.”

- “…fine.”

[missdynamighttt]

This is not a request or anything like that, I just wanted to know which MHA guys would be willing to have a threesome, as canon and as less OOC as possible in your opinion!

⋆˚࿔ kia's note ˚⋆ FINALLY FINALLY OH MY GOD IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS, THANK YOU SO MUCH NONNIE. THE REQUESTS I GET ARE NICE BUT THEY ARE KINDA OOC AND PURE ON HARDCORE PORN IM NOT SURE IM USED TO YET.

NO TO THREESOME:

katsuki bakugo, shoto todoroki, tenya iida

honestly? i get these requests but i dont believe they'd be into that or want to do it. its a nice thought but its more that they just want you all to themselves.

they dont believe in sharing. plus, with the lack of intimacy they grew up with, it took AWHILE before yall have mindblowing sex. they won't let another person see how beautiful you look, when its supposed to be all for him.

its more of an ego thing for katsuki. even if you wanted to, his pride couldn't take it. besides, he can take care of you all by himself. he doesn't need another dick, or even a dildo to have you screaming and crying out in pleasure. and if it was a girl, he'd probably just ignore her anyway.

"sure as hell ain't sharin' you, sugar, thats for sure. tch, c'mere, gimme a kiss. i'll show you why my dick's all you need. gonna fuck these stupid ideas outta that pretty little head of yours."

meanwhile, shoto and iida is just reluctant. like i mentioned, it took you awhile in the relationship before hes fucking you so good. it also just feels weird when another person sees him like that, when its only all for you to see.

"my love... as... exciting, as the idea is, i don't think i like it. is that okay? i'm sorry. i'll make it up to you. now spread these legs for me, c'mon. i'll eat you out real good, i promise."

WILLING TO TRY:

sero hanta, kirishima eijirou, midoriya izuku

they wouldn't say outright no but not outright yes either. they're reluctant because another person would see you all vulnerable like that but the idea of bringing you more pleasure gets his dick really hard.

"it.. depends who its with, mi amor. i dont like it but i don't hate it. let's make a list, yeah? narrow it down and shit and we'll see." (y'all end up picking denki.)

"that's.. not what i was expecting. don't get me wrong, i don't hate it. its hot but its a little weird, y'know what i mean? okay, good. who to ask? bakugo would kill me... mina? she would too. but i'll ask." (she said hell yeah)

"oh! um... sure, why not? i'm not sure who we could ask, though.. maybe kacchan? oh! or, uraraka-san maybe. i'll call him and you call her." (both of them said yes but y'all decided on katsuki. you got drunk on both of their dicks real good.)

YES TO THREESOME:

denki kaminari

i think y'all know why he says yes. this man is kinky as shit, no denying that. he's a pervert but he's not a maniac like mineta. the image of you all fucked out taking on 2 cocks or kissing another woman while you're bouncing on his cock and he's eating her out.. its hot.

the challenging thing here was finding someone who was willing to have a threesome with him though. the person who ended up saying yes was sero. i imagine using both of their quirks to real good use, like bondage or shocking your needy clit.

"fuck, fuck, fuck. yeah? you like getting fucked by that, don't cha? c'mon baby, fuck his cock like you mean it, c'mon."

‎‧₊˚✧[ it's me, kia ! ]✧˚₊‧ ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ ‎‧₊˚✧[ more of katsuki ! ]✧˚₊‧

[mocchii-writes]

hii!! i love your work! i would like to request head-canons with a reader who is an ex cop (could be from the same reason as jun ho, as they failed to investigate the mysterious island) but this time, they’re actually able to infiltrate into the games. you can do separate characters for gi hun, in ho, dae ho, thanos, and nam gyu?!

Squid Game Boys if You Were Undercover in the Games

Paring: Seong Gi-hun, Hwang In-ho, Kang Dae-ho, Choi Su-bong (Thanos), Nam-gyu x fem!Reader (Separate)

Warnings: Drugs

A/n: I hope I understood this correctly, Anon, it's a very cool one! ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

~🍡🍡

Hwang In-ho:

This would be very interesting indeed

Since he's also an undercover spy-esc. type, he might not even notice if you act suspicious in that type because he's covering up himself

but he also seems smart enough to figure it out

he would admire your bravery, if so, and originally planned to shut you down once he thought you'd had enough fun

but there was something about the way you looked at him sometimes that made him pause

it took him a while to realise he actually liked you, and the thought didn't exactly comfort him

you guys would play a game of tag in the dark, jumping around the fact that you're on opposing sides of a growing war

and you'd both pretend you knew nothing so you could be friendly guilt-free

he wouldn't hesitate at the chance to save your life, unlike he would for many other "friends"

he's very protective and defensive of you anytime anyplace

if anyone even thought of hurting you, pray for them fr

he's almost ashamed to admit to himself that he cares about you, but the thought hardly crosses his mind when met with false hatred for you instead.

(or what he calls hatred)

Seong Gi-hun (s2):

You knew he could use all the help he could get, and he seemed almost too kind to be in this place

and you knew you could use all the help you could get as well

so you didn't have to think long on it to decide to tell him what you knew

he trusts you, for sure

he's also protective of you, trying his best to ensure your safety even though that's a hard ask

and you protect him too, to the best of your abilities

you both have a common goal, too, and that helps with the bonding

speaking of

you two would bond pretty well imo, sharing your stories and fears with each other at night

he's not very confident in terms of romance, and he'd probably miss most of your hints because he's so used to people never glancing his way

but eventually he would understand

if not your feelings, then his own

and he would probably confess to you by like either exploding a bunch of words out of his mouth that are hardly understandable, or very quietly and clearly, like he's sharing a secret with you

Kang Dae-ho:

If you told him he would be so impressed, let's be honest here

literally star-struck, because an undercover ex-cop is the sickest thing ever??

and not to mention he definitely already admires you

he wants to know everything about your investigation and your backstory

he feels very safe with you, but still holds himself to the standard of defending you if he needs to

you'll probably have to make the first move unless you can boost his ego a little more because like I said, he thinks you're way too cool for him

you would do your best to help him, and he does the same for you

which really makes you two a crazy power couple because when you guys really link up you're unstoppable

I just know yall would devour in the riot omg

he loves loves loves you, and he loves talking to you about all the police stuff you do and his time in the military

Choi Su-bong (Thanos):

It's an understatement to say you were wary of him, and even more wary of telling him your reasons for being here

but it's not like he would notice anything weird, so you'll be alright

you were trying to keep a low profile, but Thanos didn't intend to just let a pretty girl like you get away

He tried his usual charms, and whether or not they worked is... irrelevant... 🤭

anyways

you joined his group because you thought it gave you safety, but that didn't stop Thanos from trying to win you over

after your suspicions died down, he seemed pretty genuine

so you told him your story, and he listened

he told you he'd try to help you, but neither of you know if he could really help that much

but he definitely respected you more after that

and nobody dares to mess with Thanos's girl, but if they did, you know he'd handle it

he thinks of you as a close friend as well, and he trusts you more after you tell him you're undercover

he would want to tell Nam-gyu, but he wouldn't if you didn't want him to

he would think it's hot lmao

he'd be like, "So you're a super secret spy? cool, cool. Where's your earpiece?"

"bro"

"Hm?"

it overall wouldn't really affect how he treats you, but your relationship would sift, probably for the better

Nam-gyu:

Depending on how you met, he would be really gentle with you imo

he's really nice with thanos (though he claims it's for the drugs)

so I think if he liked you he would really like you

we know he's very touchy and probably protective of you

but when you tell him your real story, he's flabbergasted

I mean sure, it makes sense, but what??

his perfect wife? (he's known you 4 days)

he's very proud of it

will probably yap to everyone about it, sadly

you'll really have to hold him back, if you can

he'd say he wants to hear about it but hed probably lose interest lmao

but he'll ask you late at night, and you two will talk for a while about your lives

he'd say he's ashamed of his life currently, and that you have so much more potential

you'd have to comfort him and tell him it's okay

also, please comfort him when he takes drugs from thanos because they make him pretty anxious sometimes

and he just wants to be with you, so hold him ♡

protects you but also knows you can handle yourself, just give him this

Sorry, I'm posting really slow but all the req will be out once I get on that grind ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

~🍡🍡

[nathanbatemanfucker]

Vuelve a Mí Pt. I

summary: you and joaquin confront the cause of the end of your relationship.

pairing: joaquin torres x f!reader

wc: 1,002

contents: 18+/minors dni, canon typical violence, angst, break up vibes, pining, longing, intense guilt, illusions to depression

AN: taking a stab at writing joaquin bc i've quickly grown enamored with him. i'm still learning his characterization and how i'd perceive him so be kind with this first try. this is just the first part & there will be another tying things up! i hope yall enjoy and i'm so excited to be back here writing again.

vuelve a mí masterlist

It’s hard to see him like this. Truthfully,  it’s hard to see him at all. Not because of anything he’s done, not even because of how he’s changed while you were gone, but from how you changed. 

It doesn’t make much sense; you had been turned to dust. Crumbled away into literal nothingness. And yet, when you returned everything felt different. Nothing, not your passions, your job, your family— Joaquin— felt like it was yours anymore. 

When you’d come back, you felt so disconnected from everything. You questioned who you were and what your purpose was, especially since so many people in your life had carried on. 

Joaquin included. 

He wasn’t Falcon when you left. He had never touched the suit. Sure he had wanted to, he had his aspirations but you had always imagined that you’d be right there to support him. 

But here you sat. Sam called you immediately, not knowing the hospital had too. You were still Joaquin’s emergency contact— after all these years he hadn’t changed it. 

So here you sit, a book in your hands as you patiently waiting for him to wake up. The doctors assured that he would wake up, he was in critical condition but young and healthy. ‘A fighter’ they’d said.

“You came.”

His voice startles you, and you flinch slightly, losing your place in the pages.

He grins apologetically, “Sorry, querida, didn’t mean to scare you.”

It takes effort to not get lost in his smile, especially after thinking that you might have lost him for good. 

You fortify yourself, crossing your arms against your chest, “More than you already have?”

“You’re one to talk, honey.”

You know exactly what he means. All the abandonment of relationships, taking risks to better understand yourself. He and others have made it clear that they’re worried about you, that you aren’t the same. Confirmation of what you’re most afraid of. 

“I don’t want to argue, not when you’re like this.”

He raises a brow at you playfully, “But some other time maybe? Over dinner?”

“Joaquin…”

You watch him physically deflate and it breaks your heart. He shakes his head, giving you a weak smile, “It was worth a shot, wasn’t it?”

“I’m sorry. I, um, I shouldn’t have come.”

“I’d be offended if you hadn’t,” He murmurs lowly.

Something inside you flutters at the soft huskiness of his voice and you’re rendered speechless for a handful of moments. Forced to acknowledge just how much you’ve missed him. Finally, you’re able to say, “I don’t know what you want me to say, Quino.”

“I don’t know, maybe something that explains why we aren’t together anymore.”

“I’ve explained that.”

“And it still doesn’t make sense.”

“That’s not fair, you don’t understand. You weren’t gone. You got to live your life with no interruptions, with no hiccups. And I got— I got nothing. I was nothing.”

He sits up, flinching as he does. You try to calm things— you had really meant it when you said you didn’t want to fight. But when Joaquin is worked up, when he believes in something his passion can’t be quelled. Isn’t that what got him here in the first place? 

He barrels past your attempts to shush him, his gaze piercing into yours as he does. “You’re right, I don’t understand. But what you don’t understand is how heartbreaking it was having to go on without you. My life was interrupted, the love of my life was taken from me and more than ever I had to serve my country. The one person that has ever truly understood me was gone. That’s a fucking hiccup if I’ve ever seen one. So no, it's not the same. No, I don’t understand, but it wasn’t easy for me. It’s never been easy without you— not before and definitely not after.”

As you listen to Joaquin’s words, you must face not only what the two of you lost together, but what he lost on his own. His struggle, his pain, forces you to turn away from your own and see his in a new light. And for the first time since you opened your eyes after being blipped, you feel like you’ve made a huge mistake. You’ve done nothing but hurt yourself and the ones you love by being swallowed by how the unknown may have changed you. 

You gave up. On yourself, on your friends and family. On Joaquin.

Your chest goes tight and you freeze as your body is flooded with emotion. It took this— him injured and angry for you to come to your senses? 

What have you done? 

“Hey, vuelve a mí,” He murmurs so gently that the tears in your eyes start to fall. “Lo siento, querida, I didn’t mean to make you cry.” 

With sharp, quick movements you wipe away your tears and stand. “I shouldn’t have come,” You repeat, stepping closer to him, resting your hand over his gently. “I’m really glad you’re okay Joaquin but I— I have to go.”

“Wait, we can talk about this, figure it out like we did before? Don’t go,” He flips his hand over in yours, lacing your fingers together.

“I’m not ready. I’m sorry. For everything, I’m so sorry,” You whisper brokenly. He squeezes your hand, running his thumb over yours in an attempt to soothe you. It only makes the guilt inside you plant itself deeper.

You swallow, shaking your head. Your mind is made up.  “Me being here…it’s just going to fuck up everything further. I’m sorry.

“Baby, that’s not—“

“Be well, Quino. Please,” you implore, untangling your hands and darting for the door.

He calls after you. Calls and calls, exerting effort you know his healing body shouldn’t. And yet, you can hear him trying until the elevator doors close. Something inside you continues to feel him. As you walk to your car, as you eat dinner later that night, as you crawl into your bed made for two. That yearning, that ache…it doesn’t change your mind. 

> pt. II

let me know if you'd like to be on my joaquin taglist!