#y'all would not believe how high I am rn

[hold-me-witcher]

I can't believe Jaskier's character and sexuality has so much incredible nuance to it.

Like yes, he's a slut, he gets chased out of bedrooms by husbands, he sleeps casually with men, he has a few usual fuck buddies around the world who are as equally as interested in just sex and no romance. He was in love with Geralt for years

The second there was someone with no actual hangups about wanting a relationship with him he fell ass over teakettle in love back and was SO CONFUSED but also a slut about it.

[et-cant-phone-home-no-signal]

okay so i couldn't help but have more thoughts watching s2e8 so here's my further rambles as i get through the episode besides me just going "oomf women <3" - spoiler alert under the cut

okay oomf women <3 sorry y'all just totally in love with the dynamic of this team it's so good and i'm sad we didn't get more of them

listen,,,,, the dark troopers are objectively terrifying and i hate them but man, they're so overkill at times sorry it feels so hopeless to watch that trooper totally annihilate and withstand din like that

on a similar note, din my beloved, how many head injuries do you have? because goddamn that's one hell of a beating and idk that "he has the helmet on!" so???? you think you can get punched in the head continuously by a beskar droid and come out with no damage?? at the very least his ears are fucked from the sound, at minimum my man has a concussion rn, and at the most he's got some serious shit going on (don't get me started on s1e8 because that's how I started writing my mando oc into the show, cause the medical issues that din most definitely would be dealing with are solid and i had to vent those medical frustrations somewhere)

apologies for the medical rant about din btw (not actually sorry tbh but yeah) cause man, that shit gets my brain working overtime, anyways i think it's so funny to watch din get thrown around like a ragdoll and then proceed to just yeet all these terrifying high tech murder droids out into space, because what ever happened to them??? i don't think we see them again?? are they just floating around in space???? that's scary bro

din lifting that trooper up by the neck with the spear with total ease,,,, yeah okay cool cool cool

on that note i fucking miss the spear so much :((( loved watching the spear choreografie and it felt so raw instead of just blaster fights, i wish we'd gotten more of that kind of stuff before it got melted down

i absolutely adore than din does not give a single fuck about literally anything other than his child. darksaber? don't know it and don't care to, just give me my kid. i respect that so much like, he doesn't care about the power it brings nor does he seem to really understand what the darksaber is or does, he just wants his kiddo to be safe with him and leave all that political bullshit to others. totally understandable

moff gideon is such a cool and complex character, and i think giancarlo esposito was the absolute perfect casting for this because he brings immense nuance to the role. why did he have me genuinely believing he was gonna let din leave with grogu? why are din and me both this gullible? is it because of his masterful delivery, or because we both want to see the best in people? maybe we'll never know

cue one of my absolute favourite fight scenes perhaps from the whole series - obsessed with the choreographie of this scene and the hand to hand combat. the spear kick and flip literally makes me pause and rewind every time like, i can't help but make a "ooh" sound out loud because i love it so much. gods we should have gotten so much more of this style of fighting!!! nothing screams mandalorian more to me than this battle y'all

DIN HOLDING MOFF GIDEON AT THE END OF HIS SPEAR OHHHH MAN yeah this scene really does it for me in so many ways i'm truly just a girl when watching this episode (not to mention he just casually accidentally became the one to rightfully claim the throne of mandalore, i'll never not find this funny as fuck, especially bo katan's reaction later i'm already giggling)

gideon's glee at bo katan not having the darksaber is actually so amusing and it rubs off on me cause why am i also cackling at her seething anger towards din rn. my man does not give a shit about this weapon, is fine just giving it to her, but because of some stupid ass ancient tradition she can't take it?? comedy gold right here. Like,,,

"the darksaber. it belongs to you." "now it belongs to her." "she can't take it. it must be won in battle. in order for her to wield the darksaber again, she would need to defeat you in combat." "i yield. it's yours." "oh no. *cackling* it doesn't work that way. the darksaber doesn't have power, the story does. without that blade, she's a pretender to the throne."

AND HER FACE THROUGHOUT ALL OF THIS IS PURE "i will murder you" AND IT TOTALLY SENDS ME!!! her grudging little "he's right." and din still not getting it, "come on, just take it." because ??? he doesn't care in the slightest, he just doesn't want the damn thing. he's got his kid so nothing else matters. i wonder if that alarm hadn't gone off, if bo would have taken it because she seemed to genuinely be considering it before the alarms went

hey remember when i said we never see the dark troopers again? yeah i totally forgot about them coming back to the ship lol sorry y'all i only ever watched this episode once because i'm too emotionally attached to the first season and never properly rewatched the second one until now. i have seen season 3 but i genuinely do not remember a single fucking thing about it so that's also gonna be fun

i think one of the reasons i find the dark troopers so genuinely unsettling is because they give off massive ww2 germany vibes, and by that i mean they visually feel reminiscent of the helmet style and it gives me luftwaffe vibes. in holland we get a lot of education on that stuff, especially since i'm from the east so we focus on that quite a bit since we were the first to be invaded (if my opa was still alive i think he would have hated star wars because of the overtness of the real war implications) so idk it sets off massive red flags and bells in my head and sends a bit of a chill down my spine. the music isn't helping though

(also this is not an open invitation to discuss war and war uniforms, i don't wanna talk about that stuff i just wanted to voice why the troopers unsettle me this much)

din patting grogu on his little head, "don't worry kid, i'm gonna get you out of here." *sobs*

all the subtle signs before luke is revealed is so *mwah*. a single x-wing arrives, grogu perks up once it enters the ship, gideon looking nervous as hell, the troopers stop and immediately shift their focus from our heroes to the newcomer,,, yeah great buildup

also luke is so damn dramatic with it, i love this kid <3 i was not a star wars child because my parents were never into it, so the mandalorian is what got me into star wars, but i really enjoy the original trilogy! a new hope is probably my fave, as simple as that sounds, just because i adore the trios dynamic in it so much, and i never thought i would get so into the lore and fandom but it's so cool?? i'm glad i could get into star wars even if it was later than most people

gideon taking his chance, din DIVING to the floor to protect his son oh my GOD, dad of the year award guys. also gideon's dramatic ass attempt immediately being foiled by cara is so funny to me, pathetic little man vibes rn

how,,, did grogu get up on the control panel?? he's so small. his dad watching him with such obvious care and love even through the helmet,,,, i love how important body language is with din and how well it's conveyed both through pedro and his stunt double (i know who it is i swear, my brain is just empty rn so if anyone wants to comment it please do). idk i love when din uses his whole head and body to convey his feelings and thoughts; tilting his head very obviously when he's confused or considering something, leaning in towards people he's really listening to, the slutty little knee (though that's mostly pedro tbh)

gods the fight choreographie *MWAH* i love it, obsessed with watching luke swipe through these troopers with such grace and ease, using the force so sparingly yet so effectively, it's not even that showy or anything, it's (mostly) very practical and i adore that!!

din and grogu having this silent conversation, they both know what has to happen next

cgi hamill can't hurt you, cgi hamill can't hurt you... but they couldn't have given him a slightly better haircut?? 😭 his unmoving face unsettles me i think this cgi is worse than what they did in rogue one for moff tarkin (that was some amazing cgi i have to say)

"are you a jedi?" ......din you're so stupid i love you so much

jedi and mandalorians are so similar in so many ways and i don't think either group likes that very much lmao, they both put younglings/foundlings at the top of their priority list, have ancient traditions that they stubbornly stick to, follow a creed of some kind and are very stuck in their ways.... maybe that's why they hate each other historically so much

had to pause on this scene because i was getting too emotional at their farewell and i couldn't see the screen through my tears ✌️ he's a good dad even if he's pretty dumb sometimes. he's a simple man in a complicated situation and he loves his son so much,,,,,,, yeah cool this is fine

LIKE COME ON THE FUCKING HEMLET TOUCH??? GROGU STARING UP AT HIS BUIR WITH THE BIGGEST WETTEST BROWN EYES THAT RIVAL HIS DADS??? DIN BREAKING HIS CREED, AGAIN, JUST FOR HIS SON???? JUST SO HE COULD SEE HIS FACE PROPERLY FOR ONCE BEFORE THEY SAY GOODBYE??? I AM EMOTIONALLY RAVAGED HOW DARE THEY I'M SO UPSET 😭 😭 😭

din why did you put your one foot tall son on the floor instead of handing him to the jedi directly lmao he's the size of a rotisserie chicken - GROGU WHINING AND HOLDING ONTO HIS BUIR'S FOOT????? I FORGOT ALL ABOUT THIS Y'ALL I'M NOT OKAY - R2 my beloved <33 favourite droid in the whole galaxy fr

luke holding grogu specially so he can see over his shoulder, i see you and i love you for this

din "brown eyes" djarin breaking my fucking heart - love the little detail that all the others are actually behind din so they haven't necessarily seen his face! just the back of his head! so luke and mayfeld are the only people that have actually seen din's face (IG-11 is a droid so i'm not counting him) - but anyway pedro is so good at the "kicked puppy wet eyed look" that i think it's gotta be his signature thing by now right?

could you imagine how fucking funny it would have been if boba appeared just in time to see luke get into his ship and he's like "isn't that the asshole jedi that sent me flying into the sarlacc??? din what's he doing with the kid???? YOU LET THE GUY THAT CONDEMNED ME TO YEARS OF PAIN AND SUFFERING TAKE YOUR CHILD AND YOU HAVE NO CONTACT INFORMATION FOR HIM??????" he would've murdered din on the spot i'm cackling

i forgot there is an after credits scene let's goo - bib fortuna looking GROSS i adore the practical effects so much more than the cgi sorry y'all you cannot beat prosthetic work goddamn he looks amazing

fennec <3333 boba's entrance mmm just straight up killing bib is such a slay honestly, the setup for bobf is so good and i love this duo, i wish we'd gotten so much more of them!!!! the hype was so real i remember being so excited when it first aired

wow what a lot of words my bad y'all sometimes i can't help myself!! hope it amuses some of you and feel free to fangirl with me over this stuff cause yeah it's awesome 👍

[dumdumsun]

Wax and Wane Sneak Peek ("Break and Mend" Sequel)

A/N: HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY, BABES!! Yes, it is I, Sun. I have returned from... hibernation. Or whatever I've been doing to cause this hiatus. Believe it or not, I actually have been writing. As of rn, I am two chapters away from finishing Wax and Wane. Just need to edit and then you all will have your weekly updates.

It would've been so cool if I posted the first chapter today since... y'know... season 3 takes place on the 4th, but... that didn't end up happening. SO! Instead, I decided to give y'all a sneak peek of Chapter Two! I would've chosen something from Chapter One, but Dustin is hardly in it, so I wanted a whole Party interaction to show y'all what I've been working on.

Just a heads up, there is a hetero relationship between Doc and Will, that will change throughout the story, since there was confirmation of his sexuality. I know I've said that many times, but I just thought it needed to be said again. Anyway! Good to be back! Love you all and enjoy!

Warnings: mentions of death, also unedited so sorry

Word Count: 712

—————————————

Sneak Peek

When Dustin had told the lot of them that they needed to set up his Cerebro, they didn’t think they’d need to hike. Mike and El had long since passed the equipment they held off to Max and Lucas. This was just so their hand-holding wouldn’t be interrupted. This also meant the two of them would be less tuckered out than the rest of the group. Dustin happily and excitedly led them all up a very, very high hill. The trip wouldn’t have been as tiresome had the sun not been beating down on them and their arms not being weighed down by the equipment.

“Dustin, I think I’ll drop dead soon.” Doc groaned. Just like her friends, she was beginning to sweat through her clothes. Though, she feared more for her outfit than anyone did theirs. It was brand-spanking new, a lavender shirt tucked into a brown corduroy mini skirt. Brenda picked it out especially for her and she was excited to wear it for the special occasion, but now she was sure she’d have to worry about sweat stains.

“Just hold out, we’re almost there.” He looked back at her with an encouraging smile.

“Aren’t we high enough?” Lucas huffed out.

“Cerebro works best at a hundred meters.”

Max sighed. “You know, I’m pretty sure people in Utah have telephones.”

“Yeah, but Suzie’s mormon.”

“Oh, shit.” Lucas widened his eyes. “She doesn’t have electricity?”

“That’s Amish, Lucas.” Doc corrected.

“Oh.”

“Then what are Mormons?” Will questioned.

“Super religious white people. They have electricity and cars and stuff, but… since I’m not Mormon, her parents would never approve.”

Doc frowned a bit. “Awe, I’m sorry, Dust.”

“Nah, it’s alright. It’s all a bit… Shakespearean.”

“Shakespearean?” Max raised a brow.

“Yeah. Like Romeo and Juliet.”

“Right.”

“Star-crossed lovers.”

“I got it.”

From a few feet behind them, Mike’s voice called out, “Hey, guys!” and they all turned around to see the great distance between them. “This is fun and all, but, uh…” He tapped his watch to indicate the time.

“I have to go home.” El explained.

“We’re almost there.” Dustin frowned.

“Sorry, man,” Mike shrugged. “Curfew.”

And with that, El clasped hands with Mike and giddily followed him back down the hill. The Party watched them with narrowed eyes and shaking heads as Dustin checked the time. “Curfew at four?”

“They’re lying.” Lucas informed.

“It’s been like this all summer.” Will shook his head again.

���It’s romantic.” Max shrugged.

“It’s gross.”

“It’s bullshit,” Dustin cut in with a sad tinge to his voice. “I just got home.”

Doc watched the couple scamper through the grass without a care or thought to how their friends would feel about them ditching their time together. And while Doc was unaware of how much room she did not have to talk, she knew that nothing would pull her away from their day dedicated to Dustin. No friends, mall, pool or boy could keep her from that.

Turning her head, she gave Dustin a one-shoulder shrug and a smirk. “Well, their loss. They won’t get to see Cerebro in action and they won’t get to meet Suzie, right?”

At that, a smile slowly graced the Henderson boy’s face. It was small and a bit trying, but it was a smile nonetheless. “Right. Onwards and upwards!” He cocked his head farther up the hill. “Suzie awaits!”

Max and Lucas threw their heads back with groans before following Dustin. Doc chuckled and adjusted the equipment in her arms, jogging a bit to catch up with them. Will was about to be right behind her, but he felt it again.

At first, it was the goosebumps. He reached behind his neck to feel the prickling there. But that presence that he felt at the mall was back. It had never really left, it just lingered all the other times. Now, though, it was here with them. It was somewhere hiding within the grass or maybe it was right in front of him and he just couldn’t see it.

“Will! Come on!” Doc called from farther up the hill. With a start, he flinched and turned around, running up the hill and catching up with them. Grinning brightly, Doc grabbed hold of his hand and continued their hike to Suzie.

—————————————

Taglist: @yurtletheturtlehenderson @crybabyalexxx @sapphicsyn @alexa-j-f @nailbatbitch @that-one-multifandom-chick @ariyabella @lonelywitchv2 @bilesxbilinskixlahey @frogserotonin @mymomsdisappointment @hewwofriends @billieissad @get0ut0fmyr00m @daylightsana @kaz3yo @satsuri3su @sassygentlemenjellyfish @thegirlwhowishedeveryonelived @unordinary-simp @raquel12 @roman0ffsheart @jjjennyxii @hereiamhereigo @wizardsgrace @meowiemari

(if you've changed your username or got a new account plz lmk! It's been awhile...)

The date for the release of "Chapter One: Suzie, Do You Copy?", will be announced soon!

[gible-love-nibles-archive]

The Start of Team Soup (Pt. 1)

YIPPIE, PMD AU story time! I am just blasting y'all with stories rn huh. I hope you guys like this as much as I did writing it. PMD is always a good time for me.

Also here is the quiz if you want to read that

Word Count: 1.9K

Taglist: Taglist: @caracello @librarian-lover @halsdaisy @pvssinboots @gloomy-selfships [If you want to be added, click here!]

(Please reblog! I like reading tags :])

Next thing I knew, I was overlooking a small forest.  Bird Pokemon flew high in the sky, I could hear Bug types buzzing.  ...I also noticed I didn’t have wings of my own.

I shrieked as I felt myself plummet to the ground like a stone.  Luckily, I landed on a branch, which comically catapulted me away into another part of the forest.  And that’s how it went for a few minutes: getting flung around and battered by trees.  

Finally, I landed on solid ground in a little clearing.  Unfortunately, I was too tired and injured to try and stand up, so I just lay there, feeling the soft grass on my belly.  

…

Coincidentally in that same forest, a Squirtle with a red scarf was whistling a tune, looking around for berries.

“🎵I might trigger an alarm, but I’ll never come to harm… Ba-naa-nanananana, something about… my mom…🎵 I think?  ...Still needs work.”

Picking a particularly large Sitrus Berry, the Squirtle headed deeper into the wood and came upon a clearing.  With a battered Pokemon sitting in the middle of it.

They were of course alarmed by the discovery, letting out a noise of surprise.  Cautiously, they approached, picking up a stick and poking the unconscious Pokemon with it.

“Uh… you’re okay, right?  Not… dead?  C’mon, wake up!  What the heck happened to you?”  Finally, the injured Pokemon opened up their eyes and stood up shakily.  “Whew!  That’s a relief!”

The other blinked to get used to the bright sun shining down on them, but at least the pain was getting weaker.  “Where… am I…?”

“This is Tiny Woods.  You were just passed out here.  Did you get into a fight or something?”

Finally, they noticed the Squirtle.  The talking Squirtle.  Talking to them.  ...They guessed they would just have to roll with it.

They tried to remember what had happened before, but all they ended up getting were waves of pain.  They rubbed their head to try and alleviate it.  The Squirtle flinched in what they hoped was sympathy.

“I… don’t really remember.”

“I guess you got conked pretty good, huh?”

“Yeah…”

The Squirtle suddenly had an epiphany.  “...Wait.  Who are you?  I’ve never seen you around here before.”

Well luckily, that was one thing they did remember.  “That’s because I’ve never been around here before.  I’m Clare, and I’m…” She bit her lip.  Would this Squirtle believe it?  It wouldn’t hurt to try.  “...a human,” she finished.

The Water-type stared blankly at her.  “But you’re a Chikorita.”

Clare hadn’t noticed earlier, but the “hand” she was using to rub her head was actually a small, pointy foot with a nail at the end.  Her body proportions felt all wrong; her head was too big compared to everything else.  And there were weird feeling lumps on her neck.  A sudden gust of wind blew behind her, sending a chill down her back and a giant leaf to smack her in the face.  A leaf that was definitely attached to her head.  

She was too hurt to have a giant reaction, but there was no denying it.  She was a Pokemon and definitely not a human.  But… why?

“Well… I was a human.  But now, for some reason, I’m not,” she said, blowing the leaf off her face.

The Squirtle “uh-huh”-ed with much suspicion.

The silence that ensued would have been uncomfortable, if not for the shout that came from behind.  “Somebody!  Please!  Help me!”  The two of them whirled around to see a Butterfree fluttering around madly with bruises on its body.

Clare hurried up to the Butterfree, injuries all forgotten.  “What happened?”

“It’s horrible!  My Caterpie fell into a cavern!  My poor baby!”

“Fell into a cavern?”  The Squirtle asked, quickly joining Clare’s side.

“A huge fissure opened in the ground, and my Caterpie fell in!” The Bug-Flying type explained.  “He’s too young to crawl out by himself!  When I went to get my baby, Pokemon suddenly attacked me!”

“You got attacked by other Pokemon?!”  The Water-type parroted with a twinge of nervousness.  A knot started to curl around in Clare’s stomach.  

“They must be enraged by the fissure… and out of control!  That’s what I think.  I’m not strong enough to fend off those wild Pokemon… What will become of my baby?”

Without another word, the Chikorita charged to where the Butterfree came from: into the cavern.

“H-Hey!  Where are you going?!”  The Squirtle’s question fell on deaf ears.  With a sigh, it hurried after the Grass-type.

...

Standing at the beginning of the dungeon, Clare started to plot a course when she heard hurried footsteps behind her.

“Don’t you know mystery dungeons are dangerous?!”  The Squirtle chided her when they caught up.  “It’s full of angry Pokemon and the layouts are super confusing!  It’s easy to get lost and tired and-”

As they were talking, the entrance of the dungeon closed behind them.  The Water-type started to panic.  “Great!  Just GREAT!  Now I’m stuck in a mystery dungeon with angry Pokemon and a crazy Chikorita!”

“And if you don’t want to stay stuck in here, you’d better follow me,” Clare sassed as she walked away into one of the narrow corridors.  

Well, that left the turtle pressed for options.  They decided to follow.  

The two of them walked in silence for a bit, Clare in front, Squirtle behind.

“...Sooooo, you never told me your name,” the Grass-type said, trying to get a conversation rolling.

“Giovanni.”

“What were you doing out in the woods if you knew there was a dangerous ‘mystery dungeon’?”

“Well, I wasn’t going to go into the dungeon!  I was just trying to find some berries!”

“Oh.”

They continued for a little while in silence until Giovanni perked up.

“Hey… Why did you run into here?”

“...I dunno, I just… couldn’t bear thinking about that kid being lost in here with no one to help them.”

The Water type nodded.

They continued exploring the dungeon, fighting off wild Pokemon until they came to a dead end… and a Caterpie.  The poor kid was crying.  “Mommy… Where are you?”  The little one sniffled.

Clare approached the Caterpie carefully.  “Hey, we came to rescue you.”

The Bug type turned around with tears in his eyes.  “Huh?”

“Your mother’s waiting right outside here.  Let’s get you home.”

Instantly, that picked up his mood.  “Ok.”  He crawled onto Clare’s back, and within a few minutes, the three found an exit and brought the Caterpie back to his worried mother.

“My baby’s safe… I’m sorry, I don’t know how I could ever thank you properly…” The Butterfree sputtered.

“With praise and HPM-” Clare cut Giovanni off by whipping her leaf in his face.

“We don’t need anything, ma’am.  We’re just glad he’s ok.”

“Yeah, yeah, of course, that comes first,” Giovanni backtracked hurriedly.

“Please, could I at least have your names?”  The mother asked.

“Well, I’m Giovanni-” The Squirtle puffed out his chest before Clare could say a word.  “-and this cool kid is Clare.”

“...He thinks I’m a “cool kid” after I accidentally dragged him into a mystery dungeon?” Clare thought.

The little Caterpie stared at them with big shiny eyes.  “... … … Cool…”  Clare looked a bit embarrassed by the adoring look, while Giovanni lapped it up.  “Thank you!  Giovanni and Clare!”

“I know it really isn’t much, but this is a token of our thanks.  Please accept it.”  The Butterfree handed the Squirtle an Oran Berry, a Pecha Berry, and a Tiny Reviver Seed.  Giovanni put them in the basket he had been using to pick berries earlier.  “Thank you so much again.  Goodbye.”

“Bye!  Stay out of trouble, Caterpie!”  Clare bade them farewell as the mother and son went off, and it felt a fluffy feeling in the Grass-type’s chest.

“Where did you learn to fight like that?!”  Giovanni sprung the question once the two were gone.

“Huh?”

“You were just taking out those guys left and right!  It was AWESOME!”

“...Instinct?”

“Well, it’s good instinct then!  ...But what are you going to do now?  Do you have somewhere to go?” She did not!  And the look on her face confirmed it.  Giovanni hummed in thought.  “Well, if you don’t have a place to stay… then follow me!”

…

The house in front of the two of them looked like it had seen better days.  The grass out front was brown and wilted in big patches, and big bushes grew over nearly the entire perimeter.  The house itself looked like it had been battered by storms and had never been properly fixed with holes in the walls and roof.

“At least it’s pretty green…?” Giovanni weakly noted.

“You’ve got to be kidding me…”

“Hey, I never said the place was going to be five-star!  The town was going to tear this place down!”

“But they lent it out to you?”

“Yeah… but…”

“But… what?”

“There was a condition.  I needed to make it a rescue team base.”

“A what?”

“You know that fissure Caterpie fell into?  Lots of disasters like that have been happening recently, and it’s been riling Pokemon up like crazy!  And a whole lot more are getting hurt, or worse.  With the high-ranking rescue teams being sent out to solve big problems, they need as many teams as they can get!”

“And you were going to be one of those teams?”

“Well… not, originally… I was just going to make it a place for me and my buddies to live, but… after seeing you jump into action to help that Butterfree, without thinking about yourself… It made me think.  Do I want to be the person who needs help, or gives it?  So… why not you and me make a rescue team together?  I mean, at the very least, if we do jobs, we can get money to fix the house.”

Clare stared down at the ground in deep thought.  She didn’t have a clue how she had gotten here.  She was a human-turned-Pokemon in a strange new world.  From how it sounded, rescue teams traveled the world, solving problems for others.  ...Maybe seeing the world would help her with her memory.  And helping people was never a bad thing, right?

“...I think you have yourself a deal, Giovanni.”

The Squirtle whooped and cheered.  “Alright!!!  As of today, we’re a rescue team!  We’re gonna take the world by storm!!!”

...The wind blew some stray leaves around.

“So… now what?”

“Oh.  Right.  Well, every rescue team has a name to differentiate each other.  We could be……… CG!  Clare + Giovanni!”  Clare shook her head.  “Yeah, mashing names together is pretty unoriginal.  Uh…… Something to do with our elements!  Leaf Water!  No, Tree-luge!  Maybeee-”

“Soup.”

“Soup?”

“Yeah, ‘cause there’s the broth— that’s the water— and then there’s the vegetables— that’s the grass-ish.  ...You know what soup is, right?”

“‘Course I know what soup is!  But… Do you really think Rescue Team Soup will be taken seriously?”

“Do you have any better ideas?”

“....................No.”

“Then Rescue Team Soup it is!  It’s already rolling off the tongue for me!”

“It’s really going to have to grow on me.”  Giovanni suddenly perked up though.  “Oh, wait!  One more thing!”  He pulled out a yellow scarf that was lining his basket.  “Here!  We don’t have to match, but since I’m always wearing my scarf, it makes sense that you should wear one too.”  He wrapped it right above the buds around Clare’s neck, tying it in the front.  “Heyyy, not bad!  I was thinking, ‘We should probably both have red,’ but that yellow looks good on you!”

She looked down (as much as she could manage).  The colors worked together surprisingly well.

[kkyujikoo]

These are my... 2...? Maybe 50, cents about the whole "freejk" thing. I'm gonna be extremely petty and at some points a whole lot sarcastic and it's gonna be long but I had to say it. As soon as I get my computer I'm gonna make it under read more, but the app does whatever it wants, as we know.

Listen, this ain't my first fan rodeo, and not even the first fan rodeo where I've been directly or indirectly accused of being some sort of pervert or delulu. I've been in fandom spaces since I was a teen, I was shipping mlm couples when queerbaiting in TV shows was still something that was seen as the norm rather than some cheap disgusting trick. I was there when fanfic spaces saw "slash" fics as something "different" and to be tagged with a more mature rating even when they just looked at each other.

I was in BBC's Sherlock's fandom and I shipped Johnlock during the hiatus between S3 and S4, at this point I'm not even feeling it when people call me delulu or a weirdo.

So, yeah, take this with a grain of salt: as a person who has seen thousands of times fandom drama unfolding and has lived too much of it... This whole situation is so ridiculous it makes me laugh. Like, yeah, it's maddening how people will blame anyone and everyone because they don't even see their own bias and homophobia, granted, but like... It also makes me laugh for the sheer dumbassery of the reasoning behind it all?

Like... Y'all are getting mad and for what? Because it sure as hell isn't the invasion of privacy, since y'all are watching the same content we're all watching and you're paying to see it the same way everyone else is. If you don't want to "invade their privacy", you should just... Stop watching content that isn't their music videos, RUN episodes or interviews. Memories and any kind of dvd/video that shows what they're doing behind the scenes shouldn't be part of their job as musicians, and therefore we're intruding in their privacy... Or aren't we?

Or maybe it's more nuanced than that: maybe the content they release on dvd/on their official channels is part of their job as entertainers, and it's been approved, and it's a small window THEY are granting us.

You know what's the REAL invasion of privacy and what REALLY invalidates someone autonomy? When you, who maybe aren't even paying to see that content (which is something I understand, like, dude, I'm not covered in money either), DEMAND what kind of behind the scenes content you want when I swear ABSOLUTELY NO ONE has asked you. Once again: you don't like it? You think it's some huge invasion of privacy? Don't buy it. Don't interact with it. Convince your friends to do the same. For all I care, just go and petition to boycott this kind of content. I know you won't do it, because... That's the thing, isn't it? It's not the invasion of privacy that bothers these people.

Y'all aren't mad because we get into their business or else you would have gotten real mad when we were privy to REAL private moments like people crying their hearts out.

No, no. Y'all are mad because it's "shipping content" and "fanservice" which apparently bothers you because it lacks authenticity.

Pick a side, lovelies: either you DON'T want to invade their privacy, and thus all the content they release should be focused on what fans want to see, or you WANT to know how they interact TRULY in private.

And here's the catch: "shipping content" can be anything. Shipping existed WAAAAAYYY before the word for it was invented, same way with fanfictions. Shipping means, literally, "seeing two (or more) people interact and thinking they would make a good romantic pair". That's it. That's quite literally it. Everything else is just some nuance of the concept of shipping, but at its core, it's nearly impossible to ban all shipping content when it's a group of seven people, because they should for real go in social distancing mode to do so. Most people who have parasocial relationships tend to have "ships" whether they know it or not, because we've all, at least once, looked at a dynamic from the outside and thought "oh man they look cute together". So, even if, o dear ones, your wishes were granted... What the hell do you mean by "shipping" content? Should they just film solo clips, avoiding talking about the other members? But wouldn't that be fanservice, since it's focused on pleasing the fans? (Which, ultimately, is what fanservice MEANS, and I hate to break it to y'all but the whole concept behind entertainment and thus all the content BTS releases it's... For the fans. Like, they're not going out of their way to just meet our expectations but they're certainly doing fanservice by the mere act of releasing bonus content.)

But it's not even quite that, is it? Because no one bats an eye if it's Tae kissing Nj's cheek. I've seen no hashtag against everyone - and I mean literally every one of them - wolf whistling at Nj. It's okay to show intimacy... Because they're bandmates and it's okay to be close to someone who you see basically 24/7, I hear you. And it's also okay when people see that and gush over that closeness, because it's such a nice thing to see.

Soooooo... We've got to free JK from whom exactly? From what?

Are y'all mad cause people pointed out there's very little way a bruise that stayed for a whole ass night could be a quick bite? Because that doesn't harm jk, at most makes fun of him and jimin and their poor excuses (seriously, guys, next time consider using mosquitoes or "I was doing stuff". It'll be equally embarrassing but at least the meme will be funny), and it's literally... A fair observation. Like. It's a hickey, people are gonna make jokes about seeing a hickey and poor excuses of covering it up in the exact same way they're gonna make jokes over jimin falling out of chairs. And yeah, a hickey is AT LEAST something that happens in a sensual context. Like, I could understand "people who are extremely familiar with each other will have different body language/touch in areas where usually you wouldn't see friends touching each other", but that's not. Not a hand on the thigh. It's a hickey on the neck. I don't even know a more stereotypical placing for a hickey. But once again, are y'all mad because someone is pointing it out? Because that's not being delulu or even being a shipper, really, it's just commenting on something that was approved to be shown and discussed in something that was released BY THEM.

Are y'all mad at hybe for showing something that literally fell onto their hands? Cause like, unless someone (I'm counting on Jimin, since as we know Jungkook was busy spinning him round and round and had both his hands busy) called at hybe headquarters to say "yo bang pd substitute, is it okay if I give my friend jk here a hickey? Cause he's being really annoying rn and he has to pay", I highly doubt anyone expected Jungkook to come to rehearsal all neatly marked up. Or idk, maybe someone at hybe asked them "we need Jungkook to come in with a hickey but refuse to say it's a hickey, so that fans will feel reeeeally served." That sounds perfectly plausible too. Or a good marketing strategy.

Now, if you're a big company and your objective is to have some footage of the rehearsals for a concert, and the fandom is too good at noticing stuff for their own good, and one of your artists comes in with a very visible mark, and he and his bff bropal4lyfe come n with a story about how they were playing and a bite happened, you've got three choices: 1. Cut the artist out of aaaaalll the footage. Someone would have noticed the "bite mark" anyway, you best believe that. If you don't want anyone to notice it, you gotta cut him in most of the footage where it's visible. 2. Keep the hickey, discard the explanations. You could do that, but also it would feel a lot more unfaithful to everyone involved. Also they clearly worked their ass off to invent an explanation, come on! They truly tried to do their best inventing something that was not "it's a mosquito bite", they should get some credit! 3. Keep the bite, keep the explanation.

Notice how none of these solutions include the biting never happening because... They couldn't prevent it? The only thing they have any control over is how they're framing each "accident". And that's not an easy job.

I applaud you, people on the editing team.

So... On whom should we cast the blame now? Ah, yes, I think it's finally time for the ultimate scapegoat of this fandom: Jimin. Which is funny, cause... You know... If this were really about privacy, or being "victims" of shipping... This should be about freeing him too, you know? But obviously Jimin does it for attention, while Jungkook, poor angel that he is, doesn't even know what shipping is.

Furthermore, don't we all know how much Jimin imposes himself in Jungkook's life? To the point where he, multimillionaire man feels compelled to share a car with Jimin even if they're both late in the process. And can't you see how uncomfortable he is, draping himself over Jimin, making Jimin drap himself over him?

Oh lordy, truly such an awful eight years Jungkook spent, choosing to have vacations with someone who made him uncomfortable, spending free time with him, even having to suck his ear in public to the point you can see his saliva just because Jimin was sad :( truly an all-around bad time for Jungkook, as evidenced by alllll those times when he said Jimin was pretty, cute, and all-around knowing every little thing about Jimin. I absolutely concur, the dude would be so much more happy if jimin was not in his life.

Did that sound weird and absolutely ridiculous and a really absurd joke? Because that's what y'all sound like to me. Like. Jungkook is out there living his best life, getting hickeys and showered in affection and y'all paint him as a fucking martyr??? I'm sure he's really truly desperate that Jimin holds him in such high regards 😭😭😭 I can see him suffering whenever he starts doing his own serendipity rendition 😭😭 and when he claimed you are me, I am you as his and Jimin's only 😭😭😭 I cannot believe this poor baby 😭😭😭

I've reached a point where every time I hear this stuff I laugh because the levels of twisting reality when it comes to jikook are extraordinary, Jungkook will have a literally blissed out face and people will cry in outrage.

But coming back to my point: let's pretend you're not mad at Jimin and the possibility that jikook are dating: are y'all mad... At the hickey? Because at this point it seems like the only feasible solution. And if you are, do not worry: I'm sure Jungkook's skin was throughly healed by his boo. A kiss soothes even the worst pain, doesn't it?

[sunkissed-mogai]

Ewwww I hate the ecosystem unit. It's so hard to memorize things, and when am I gonna use this irl???? At least atoms and solar systems and stuff are cool!!! But ecosystems? Disgusting. I don't want to learn about those. | I'm sure y'all are gonna make your way to broadway!!! I'm sure that any musical would be lucky to have y'all !!!!! (/gen) | Yes !!! Part of the reason I like theatre so much is it's the kind of thing that includes a bunch of people working together to make one thing, and it feels very poetic and happy 4 me. I bonded w/ 2-3 of my friends bc of theatre!!! | Yeah, she's never needed help staying grounded b4 so I think I'm gonna brush up more on my grounding techniques. They never rly help me get un-floaty, but I think they may help her, so I'll learn more so that i can help her more!! | Yeah, but I'm sure she'll be at school tmrw! Maybe I'll ask for either her url or number at some point. Rn I'm to awkward to talk to her unprompted, but I'll work up the courage one day! | My window is open so I can hear the road and stuff and it's actually kind of nice! With the way the ac is set up and me trying to save power, it'll probably be open for a while. -⭐

right??? like when am i ever gonna walk into an ecosystem and be like "oh yes!! this has a wonderful food web! i shouldn't take out the snails no matter how much i want them as pets because that would collapse the entire web!" like??? ew.

that's one of our fav parts as well! we have so many theatre introjects and i'm sure they'd all agree. working as a whole >>>

oooh, pursuit of thigh high converse gal? i believe in u!

[nezhapreferences]

Hey, are you still taking requests?? If so, how would Nezha and Ao Bing react to a very affectionate, cuddly, loving s/o?? They deserve some love and cuddles 🥺👊

I am so so so sorry for not answering this! I’ve been dealing with some things in my life rn, so I can't really focus on requests.

But I’m here now! And this is just too cute to pass!

Here are Nezha and Ao Bing with their cuddly s/o!

Nezha

- This gUY-

- He isn't exactly used to physical affection, as he normally refuses it from his mother.

- Cuz he believes any kind feelings towards him are out of pity.

- But from you?

- oH boy

- He doesn't want to give or receive any physical affection from you at first and starts acting like a damn jerk about it.

- But when you cuddled him while he was sleeping and woke up to see that he was spooning you...

- Oh man, he realized what he was missing out on.

- Ever since then, whenever he's feeling tired, he literally snatches you up with his Red Armillary Band so that he could cuddle with you.

- There are several times when he'll just come up and hug you from behind, like he relaxes and reminds himself of the major reason he doesn't allow himself to become a heartless demon.

- (if you didn't know already, it's you (: )

- Not that you mind though, you love giving Nezha the physical love that he's practically starved of.

- He just wants to hold you close, so it literally does not matter what position you two are in.

- He doesn't feel too protective aka being the big spoon all the time, because he's Nezha the flame demon. He's so sure that no one would even think about snatching you up as you two sleep, and he's honestly not wrong.

- You're all over him more than ever in the winter months.

- Like, not only does he train a lot and keeps his body heat high, his element is fire. So he'll automatically be very warm.

- Flame boi loves you and your cuddles.

Ao Bing

- At first, he was flustered and calling it unprofessional.

- But over time, he started getting used to your hugs and cuddles.

- It started with just interlocking pinkies, though it could only be when you two were alone.

- It soon graduated to hand-holding, which didn't last long cuz this boi's hands get sweaty so easily.

- It came to the point where he knew he couldn't get away from your affection and simply had to deal with it.

- Like Nezha, he is not used to affection, so he was very stiff during cuddles or hugs. Sometimes he even nudged you away, but simply because he grew uncomfortable.

- You, being the understanding s/o you are, were patient with him, giving him comforting hugs while still considering his feelings.

- Because of this, Ao Bing quickly dived into the affectionate level after you broke down his walls.

- Turns out he's more cuddly than you are!

- Of course, you can NEVER do this in front of the other dragons, them lizards be tattling-

-=-=-=-

Okie, hope y'all enjoyed this!

[titaniumblender]

Irrational rant ahead, you have been warned. I hope to delete this on June 9th and for the leaks to be completely wrong 🤡 Anyway don't come for me I know I'm a fucking spaz and BELIEVE ME I WISH I WASN'T. My shipper heart is just upset 😒😪

Y'all I'm really out here trying to be a mature young adult but SORRY I DON'T HAVE THE EMOTIONAL MATURITY TO DEAL WITH A JK ENDING RN. I was so happy with how it ended originally and now I'm up here 🤡🤡 because I defs did not want my girl Mikasa to end up with my boy Jean who I thought was going to fucking slide into Pieck's pants. AND I KNOW ITS IRRATIONAL AND I KNOW THEY'RE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS BUT IT UPSETS ME!!!!! For me this seems unnecessary, the ending was open to interpretation before and I think that way everyone could kind of be happy.

I see a lot of ppl being like well u know Mikasa should have moved on its what she deserved blah blah blah, you know what good for you lads for being mature young adults who want the best for my girl. BUT I AM NOT THAT PERSON AND I REALLY WISH SHE COULD HAVE JUST BEEN A HAPPY SINGLE BITCH, because to me her and Eren's love isn't something one just 'gets' over, its the kind of thing that transcends to the next life. There wasn't any need to add an additional love interest for her here, none at all. And to everyone else who feels this way but also feels kinda garb about it because its like yeah, maybe she should logically move on or whatever but its okay if you don't want that as well. Every time I consider this I think of Chrissy Teigen who I think in an interview somewhere that she said she would leave a note in her husband, John Legends pocket saying he was her killer if she ever died or something because she'd rather he go to prison than ever remarry. AND FUCKING MOOD ABOUT EREMIKA. I'm selfish like Eren and I don't want her to be with anyone else either!!

And don't even start me on why I hate this for Jean omg. I used to fucking HATE Jean but I grew to slowly like him more over time and now I vibe with him and his general douchiness, that's my ladies man right there. Him ending up with Mikasa kills me for a lot of reasons, most obviously because I think he settles for second best. In no world where Eren lives, does Mikasa end up with Jean and I think that's just disrespectful. I'm a little biased because I was waiting for some JeanPiku because I think their relationship would just be awesome, the glimpse I saw of suave thinks he's a ladies man Jean in SNK Junior High hooked me and I was hoping that would play out for him or I could at least head canon that. This takes that entire possibility away and I'm left to think about him pining after moping Mikasa because don't tell me my girl didn't undergo so major fucking depression after everything she went through. Not what I wanted for him. And next on my list of grievances is just the fact that we don't ever see any development between them or at least on Mikasa's part. Like obviously I strongly dislike the ship but I might have been more partial towards it if I had seen some more real development of it but there was really no opportunity for that. IDK the whole thing just feels disingenuous to me almost, I'd rather it be another farmer-kun than Jean.

UGH anyways thanks for coming to my ted talk, I'm going to go write revenge Eremika porn now and thats that. But if anyone is like me and kind of feels bad about feeling Mikasa should have ended up alone, don't ur totally valid, they're fictional characters and u can feel however u want to!!

[nexyra]

for the rwby character asks, whatcha got about Nora? :)

Ooooh Nora !! Thank you for the ask, I wasn't expecting her but this is great, this is gonna be interesting, I'll be organizing my thoughts & realizing how I fel as I go

My fav ship(s) for the character

Basic but I'm obviously very soft for Renora 🥺 The show has given me too much for me to not like it y'know ??? The companionship, the shared past, their easy bond & complicity, how well they complete each other... Nora with her determination and enthusiasm and emotionnal intelligence. Ren who is more level-headed, peaceful but also insightful. MHMMM I dunno if I'm making my case well but yea; I care them ! There's like... only one detail I dislike about their shipping interaction (the unexpected/kind of unasked for kissing at Robyn's rally if anyone is wondering) but otherwise they're very good

Next up is the poly Renorarc, I dunno I just think they're soft. Like; on one hand Ren & Nora are sooo close but at the same time I feel like the show striked a great balance and managed to still really make them a trio and I love their team-moments where they are all grieving or touching or caring for each other. They're neat !! And Nora has the biggest emotionnal intelligence I think, and she takes care of them both so well... She's also a pillar of enthusiasm. I love the scene they have at Pyrrha's statue !

If I have to think of a less common ship, I'll prob go with Gingersnaps, I think Penny & Nora had cute moments in V8; they're both lovely enthusiastic cuties, and thematically they both had an ongoing arc about finding themselves so they're nice together.

My least favorite ship(s) for the character

Mhmmm the least fav is harder already. So; like for pretty much all the kiddos I'll start out by saying that all the ships with adults are a No from the get go. Now to elaborate on the more "feasible" ships...

Candy Cane (Nora x Oscar) is a No from me. They are family, brother & sister strictly, I can't see them any other way ! Nora is the cuddly & overbearing big sister, nothing more >:0 Please let them beee ;;

Other than that, Heavy Metal (Mercury) & ThunderCat (Blake) are both ships that don't really interest me, I don't remember any interesting interaction to bring them together so meh x)

My fav & least fav platonic relationship(s) for the character

Good question ! I'm not sure so let me mull on it for a bit...

I like the Renorarc team both romantically AND platonically they have their spot here...

I really like Nora & Oscar ! She's such a big sister to him it's adorable. In V4 to V6 she's one of the characters who tried to include Oscar the most. Teasing him, hugging him & including him in the convo and the chaos. She's very earnest and open about her appreciation and he really needs that. At the same time, she can bit a tad too much but she recognized that and I liked that. How slowly and softly she hugged him at the start of V8 ;; So yea.

I'm not sure what my least fav platonic relationship would be... I can't think of anyone right now honestly !

My favorite thing about the character

Mhmmm I think I like her emotional intelligence ! Like, we all know Nora is funny and excited and enthusiastic... But I like the calmer & more vulnerable moments; when she recognize Ren's trauma & takes off with him, when she takes his hands and say "I won't let you kill yourself like this." When she tells Jaune "You're not being fair to yourself. We love you, just like we loved Pyrrha.". When she comforts Penny "It's just a part of you, don't forget about the rest."

I just think it's nice when Nora gets to comfort those she cares about, along with protecting them =)

My biggest criticism for the character

Mmmmh good Q too. I don't think I have much to criticize about how they handle Nora's character in general ? Soo maybe more like... how things were presented maybe ? If anything, I guess there are some details that could have been handled better about her relationship with Ren in V7-8. For example, I wish the faults had not been presented as so one-sided. Ren struggles with communication and it was shown clearly. However Nora's "Screw talking then !" and subsequent kissing wasn't any better in term of communication, even though it was taken as a great milestone because "first kiss !!". I personally feel that they both were at faults during this arc ? Ren for bottling up & not sharing his struggles, but Nora as well because she lacked patience and was more concerned by their relationship/where they stood than how Ren was actually handling everything. Does that make sense ? I looooved the second part of their convo in Risk, it was adorable really. But I wish the first part hadn't be so unilateraly accusing toward Ren ? Sorry if I'm like... branching out from Nora it goes together in my head ?? Tell me what y'all think !

When was their writing at the peak according to me

To be honest, I think Nora is peaking right now so I have high hopes for her character in the next season ! As for the why I like Nora right now... I think V7 was good at putting her a bit in the spotlight, with the times she confronted Ironwood about Mantle's situation. It was reminiscent of the harsh times she lived herself, and how she could relate to Mantle as a consequence. As someone who liked V7 Ironwood, I sometimes found her to be a bit harsh but you know what ? It was still a GREAT thing. She can be harsh and go too far. It makes sense for her. Let her be a not 'big picture' kind of character who focus on the little person. It let her fight for what she believed in & what she knew. So I really liked that !

V8 was good too because it acknowledged what some people disliked about her, aka the fact that it was Renora instead of Ren & Nora. Nora needs the room to breathe as her own person, and V8 acknowledged that, it brought to life some of her insecurities and all of it was nice. Who am I if not the overexcited "be strong hit stuff" girl ? That's the question I'm eager to see her solve. There is of course already MORE to her, that she fails to see, but it should still be interesting to delve into.

A song I think fits them & why

Line without a Hook (Ricky Montgomery) for Renora + Walk me Home (P!nk) + I wouldn't mind (He is We) + Would you be so kind (Dodie) + I dare you (Bea Miller) ? (might edit to add more, i want a non-romantic song but it's late & i'm lacking in ideas rn)

A headcanon to make up about them

Nora has a big appetite and doesn't hesitate at the table because she knows what it's like to go hungry. She takes full advantage of Ren's cooking ;)

She's still able to share with her closed ones though

What I would change about them if I was making a re-write

MHMMM, apart from what I've said in the criticism section maybe just... mhm... OH YEA ! I'm... well I kind of understand why they did it ig, because they wanted Nora apart from Ren in V8; and I liked Ren's side too much to change it but... I feel like it would have made more sense for Nora to help Mantle instead of Amity in V8 ? Because in V7, Nora was very much in opposition to Ironwood. It was "the little guy" vs "the bigger picture" and it fitted Nora well... But then she chose Amity over Mantle and like. I wouldn't go as far as to call it JARRING but if you mull on it, it's definitely kind of weird.

My guess for their MBTI/Enneagram

ENFP 6w7 9w8 3w2 so/sx

One aspect that I think would be nice to delve deeper into ? (optional)

Give us her backstory ! I mean I know we got the Renora village backstory but I wanna know what happened to her before. What is it with her mom ?

[martiniblves]

mijoo and her iconic entrances DFKLSJGDF

yes, i really am recycling the intro some of you probably Just caught when you followed me DGSFLJLGSD

hey y’all, i’m kat, english student and an old hag :/ also slowly coming down from an anxiety moment, hence only deleting old shit now and potentially going rogue from my blog for the night after posting this ( aka, best if y'all send me your d*scord users bc it's much easier for me there ) sfdgjgfd i’m super excited for this group and can’t wait to read all about your muses !  and hoping you feel the same, i’ll get right to introducing avalon bay’s resident messy brat, dahlia !

[ lee mijoo ] dahlia kim, twenty-four, cis female, she/her, radio dj — a world-class traveler in the making, self-proclaimed “ reformed ” groupie, has been a tennant at avalon bay for two years, her cherry blaster obsession is the sweetest thing about her, she slept with an ex-best friend’s roommate and crush as revenge. [ kat, 22, nt, she/her ]

she often goes between dahlia and dia, first and foremost sdfglkj

came from a super small town in upstate new york where there wasn’t much to do or much to see, so growing up she had an adventurous streak that would run rampant when she was able to go off by herself, able to drive, and finally able to leave it behind

her family life was rather average, her parents scraped by financially but her and her two younger siblings never really went without — aside from a toy or two at christmas or a brand new car for their sixteenth birthdays sfgkljgdf

gets on fine with them, but her and her little/middle sister have had an on-and-off contentious relationship that, at the moment, is very much ON SDFGFG

small town life was.. okay overall, she was social Enough and polite but never really maintained any close relationships with her childhood pals once high school came and went, mostly bc the town was full of gossips so everyone thought poorly of each other and passed it onto their kids LSKFDGJGDFL

and yes, i’m kinda basing this off of the antics of adults from my hometown, what about it ??

she spent most of her formative years with her head in the clouds and music always around her or on her mind

so you bet she wound up taking guitar and piano lessons when she was a kid and well into her teens, and dare i say she was pretty good at it fsdglkjgdf

having that skill gave her the boost of confidence she needed from middle school onward, having been a tad reserved before then

idk what else to add bc i honestly can’t think of anything else about her past Before moving away. dull as hell probably, more than it’s already been said LKGSDF

upon moving to the city, she attended nyu just to keep her parents from completely losing their minds over her not.. wanting to go on a sure path, majoring in communications and spending much of her time as a dj for the campus radio station’s late night shows

soon began searching for dj gigs at major radio stations once she’d graduated and landed a spot as an intern to meet with artists the station wished to interview, etc, and even had an opportunity or two to interview them herself

through that job, she became more exposed to the groupie lifestyle and — having always been somewhat intrigued — soon became one ( of sorts ) 

sorry if you’re a fan of h*lsey bc this might come across as a dig, but this is where she becomes the chill version of groupie!h*lsey that h*lsey wishes she had been DFLSKJDGSFL

she liked the attention from drummers, singers and rappers alike — plus having sex with talented, rich people whenever they were in town didn’t hurt one bit — and she kept it all separate from her job, although it did help the station land more interviews, tickets for contests, etc

wasn’t big on hard drugs, but she never shied away from a bong being handed to her or a couple of xanax tablets, just so we’re clear here sdflkgjfdgk

however, the no-strings set-up quickly shifted for dahlia upon meeting a rising indie band’s lead singer

he was smooth as hell, which she already knew alongside his tendency to get bored easily with fangirls-turned-groupies like the rest of the musicians she’d met, so when she played along with his game, it didn’t take long for him to maintain an interest in her and for them to forge something of a friendship

she’d never admit it to anyone, but he was her first love as the initial sexual attraction very quickly became romantic after long conversations about music and aspirations, mundane happenings in their lives separate from their encounters and who should’ve won immunity on the recent ep of masterchef; dia knew he wouldn’t settle down now and she knew that while she was his number one at that point, she wasn’t the only one he had. a couple of months passed where it seemed like he was going only to her, that his interest rarely waned to the other girls that would swarm him, which led her to believe he was at least somewhat into her and to her confessing when they were both drunk one night — only to be shut down but not shut out

dejected and heartbroken, she still couldn’t quite distance herself from him like she knew she should and the front she put up — that she exaggerated her feelings and would get over it — made him none the wiser

however, he couldn’t get over the thought of his fwb still being in love with him and cut ties with her abruptly before his nth departure from nyc

it took her right out of her bubble, left a horrible taste in her mouth to even go back to being a groupie for others over how poorly it all went with him, so she abandoned the sexual aspect and potential intimacy of it — but not before taking herself completely out of that lifestyle for a few months to get over him

which.. lbr, she’s only 90% of the way there to this day sfdlkkdfsgl

upon going back, she showed up to shows and parties solely as a friend of the performer.... before that got old Quick and she realized how soul-sucking it was for her sexually frustrated And repressed ass KFSLJGS

though ask her pals and they’d think she’d given it up altogether, hence her supposedly being reformed

.. at least she isn’t indulging in drugs like she occasionally used to, so that counts for something lksdfjlgdf

as for her time in radio, she got promoted to a morning slot as a dj with a couple of co-hosts last year, though once an afternoon slot opened, she high-tailed it out of there

anything to get back to her chill, late night roots and this was the first step

lastly, she moved to avalon bay 2 years ago, after uni was done and she had to move out of the dorms. in that time, she’d become best friends with another girl and had a massive falling out bc the other was. well. changing for the worst sgfjgfd

she became selfish, judgmental, advantageous and disloyal, and soon dia had enough of her hypocritical and generally nasty antics ( and not without a brutal argument that left both of their egos bruised )

dahlia isn’t always one for petty revenge, but when the ex-bff’s roommate and crush — who dia had a slight interest in as well — bumped into her in the hallway of their dorm one night, she took her chance to knock the other down a peg by initiating a flirtatious conversation that quickly turned sexual

with her ex-bff being on the other side of the wall of said roommate’s room

safe to say that their ( final ) conversation in the morning was a fucking disaster SDFLGKJGFDK

it’s not something she’s entirely ashamed about, but dia doesn’t feel the need to disclose what happened

PERSONALITY AND OTHER SHIT

she loves her friends, would die for them, would kill for them. let’s get that straight first and foremost !

does that mean she’s the nicest or even the most tolerable person ?? fuck no SFGLJGKDF

i described her to one of my pals as a “ chaotic free-spirit with a mean streak when she doesn’t get her way, ” which. could also describe a couple of my bitchier muses tbh FLDKGJDS

but she’s stubborn, irritable and has a sense of high self-worth and self-preservation

she obviously has an attitude that can and will come out if you hurt her or someone she cares about/someone she thinks doesn’t deserve it

or if you think you’re a god or something

and it can get ugly.. as explained above dfskgdgkf

however, we love confident women on this blog and here you have one !

she’s chill for the most part, so you ( probably ) won’t have anything to worry about if you stay on her good side gfsdkljgfd

passionate af about radio and music as a career, wants to have a gig like zane lowe’s beats hosting job or even annie mac’s one day

although she also wishes to put out music of her own at least Once before she dies dfgsljdfgk

bit of a wild child, likes to party and just do her own thing — partially bc she’s scared of getting older and having to give that all up/being forced to act her age

doesn’t mean she doesn’t like her quiet nights in though !

closet romantic, just wants to be swept off of her feet..... but no one needs to know that, at least she doesn’t think so FSDJKGFD

won't let you see it anyways, at least unless she's Interested and knows you're not someone who's only useful for her in the short-term

also quietly doting, will never be the mom friend bc it’s too much responsibility and patience, but will always be a good shoulder to cry on who tells you your feelings are valid before she tells you to toughen the fuck up and amend a situation yourself, might even tell you how

some exceptions may apply FDLSJGSFLK

a bit vulgar at times, just warning you now fgldskf

wants to see the world and has travelled a little as it is bc of her connections. loves it

JFKDGS

has a pet succulent bc she Knows she can't look after the big fluffy dog of her dreams rn

named him bobby after one of the characters from the love island game DFLKGSJF

i honestly dk what else to add rn, plus i’m eager af to post this so we’ll end it here ! cute extras can always be posted later !

[jiminnamoro]

get to know me tag!!♡ i was tagged by @xlilybebe thank you bebè!!

How tall are you? I might be short but my dick is as long as my arm (im 160 cm on a good day cmon)

What color and style is your hair? oh man, I'm naturally blonde- a dark, grey-sh kind of blonde? rn my hair is dark pink w blue tips, a wavy mess that i sometimes straighten but ehh I dye it so often that ppl are confused when they see me :(

What color are your eyes? blue/grey 

Do you wear glasses? of course, have y'all ever seen me without glasses ?? ew 

Do you wear braces? nope

What’s your fashion sense? i have no idea sdfghd I generally dress casual chic, but i genuinely like to dress up on particular occasions !!! the more feminine, the better (im in love w dresses n high heels but also w harnesses n flannels n converse n see through t-shirts n oversized sweaters im a mESS)

Full name? my name’s silvia !! please dont call me sylvia :( my middle name is luisa bc its my grandmas name but its just. a church thing, u know? I never use it 

When were you born? april 14th 1996

Where are you from and where are you now? born and raised here in piacenza, italy!! its a tiny small baby town near milan

What school do/did you go to? both elementary school and middle school were v basic I guess? as for high school, I attended a cookery school where I got my diploma and now uhh I'm a baker/pastry chef 

Favorite Subject? italian literature and english were my fav subjects!! I was v good at them 

Favorite TV shows? the x files bc. aliens

Favorite Movie(s)? my fav movie has to be dracula untold!! and also doctor strange and weekend at bernies and five feet apart!!! I generally like romantic movies tbh 

Favorite Book? /slams fist on the table/ d r a c u l a who is also my dad

Do you have any regrets? i dont think so?? as a stubborn bitch, I've done a bunch of things and idk those experiences made me the person I am now so I dont think I have regrets 

Dream job? the one I already have!! I like being a pastry chef, just not @ the place I currently work at

Would you ever like to be married? who would even think about marrying me dude lets be real no ones gonna put a ring on my freaking finger anytime soon

Would you like kids? no no no no no no

How many? z ero nada nessuno no thanks

Do you like shopping? i do like shopping!! especially online shopping :( so I dont have to feel bad when I'm trying on clothes that. dont fit. I also hate dealing w shop assistants bc I cannot say no so I always end up buying a shit ton of stuff I dont need sigh 

What countries have you visited? germany, austria, switzerland, france, england, the netherlands and my own country obv

The scariest nightmare you’ve ever had? the scariest nightmare happens every single time I wake up n I have to look at myself in the mirror thats. a real fucking nightmare lemme tell ya

Any enemies? uhh uhhhhhh i dont know :(

Self-doubt? thats my second name 

Any significant other? im too ugly to have that 

Do you believe in miracles? hell yea 

How are you? i dont wanna talk about it sdfghfs

[hannahlovestheatre]

Riverdale + Heathers = how very...(a good rant and review)

Ok so to start off if you're someone who doesn't watch Riverdale and only watched it solely to watch this episode because you thought it would be "trash" or you were politely curious or whateva whateva, here's a small, spoiler free synopsis of what's been going on this season...

This season of Riverdale has had a hard focus on cults and a massive drug possession. The people running this cult are complete wackadoos and Betty Cooper is determined to stop them as they have taken her mom and sister and also they are bringing out the worst in the citizens of Riverdale and ya know KILLING SOME OF THEM. The cult branches out from a creepy board game come to life called Gryphons and Gargoyles but we don't have to touch on that as much. The drug thing is all on Veronica Lodge's father but her mom has been helping on the side and so has Jughead's mom. Everyone in the town is turning against each other and it's been hard to find trust in people that don't see things through the eyes of "The Farm" or are trying to distribute some strong ass drugs.

Tbh that's not even a good description but it gives some good background on the main points of drugs and cults. Now...

Heathers is a world renowned CULT classic movie. The creators clearly used the term to their advantage (literally the only people to applaud at the end of the school's production were the MEMBERS OF THE CULT) and once again connected their characters to the characters of another piece of work and saw this as another opportunity to do a musical episode considering their Carrie one was a success for them even though it wasn't everyone's favorite, but of course I liked it, and Heathers is now a staple to the world of musical theatre.

I think that the Heathers episode was executed a lot better than the Carrie one. I appreciated the Carrie one more because that musical is so slept on and they were able to get the word out about it. But the Carrie episode was more focused on being an episode about the school musical and showed more of the rehearsal process and what the numbers looked like in their production rather than incorporating the songs into real life to make them seem more relatable. The Heathers episode actually incorporated itself into the current storyline of the show and helped tie up some loose ends with the relationships of this season. All the songs they used supported the conflicts and state of mind for each character. They didn't even have the cast sing songs that their Heathers characters sing like for example Betty and Jughead sang Seventeen even though Betty was cast as Duke and Jughead isn't even in the show (we will touch on this later because I think my puddle of tears is still in the living room). They also heard our prayers to have Casey Cott sing more and then threw Cole Sprouse in there to make it even better. (Thanks Riverdale creators!)

Long story short, it seemed more like if Glee were doing a Heathers episode which I stan hard as I am the biggest gleek to ever gleek.

I think they picked all the right songs, Fight For Me was the biggest surprise choice to me but I liked what they did with it again for context sake. If they had found a way to add Freeze Your Brain, The Me Inside of Me, and/or Shine a Light I would have been interested in seeing that. It also would have been cool to see I Say No (Betty would have nailed it as she is saying a big fat no to this cult).

I also wasn't as mad about them using the lyric changes that are in the school edition because it hit me. This is a HIGH SCHOOL putting on a production of HEATHERS THE MUSICAL. Since most schools would either get a big checkmark in the NO box to even put on the show, if a school did get the clear to put on Heathers, they would 100% have to do the school edition. So ya know what haters, they're actually being realistic with the production they actually got the rights to put on. It makes so much sense coming from a hardcore theatre nerd like myself.

Yes I would say some of the cast was autotuned but my mom thought everyone was a great singer and she was very genuine in that comment. Casey Cott, Lilli Reinhart, and Camila Medes are definitely the most polished but Vanessa Morgan, KJ Apa, Madelaine Petsch, Ashleigh Murray, and COLE SPROUSE are also very strong singers. They have more guts to sing this hard score than most people do in community theatre productions of Heathers.

I do think the casting of their musical was mostly spot on only I didn't really see Josie playing Veronica. But going back to my point on the episode not really touching on the actual musical production of Heathers that's happening, it didn't really matter. They pretty much never showed her singing Veronica's stuff so it went right over my head. I think Toni could have been a great Veronica as her Dead Girl Walking had spot on interpretation but actually Betty could have knocked it out of the park as Veronica and Toni could have been Duke to heighten the conflict between her and Cheryl at the time. They didn't HAVE to do it this way because they know the show better than we do but if I were casting Hearthers with Riverdale characters, that's where my head was going.

I know everyone said Betty should be McNamara and Veronica should be Duke but as I watched the episode, I realized everyone based that off looks because McNamara's dad is "LOADED" and the poor girl tries to kill herself because of what goes on outside of the social circle aka literally what Veronica is going through on the show right now. It all clicked. I believed her when she sang Lifeboat. And Betty is a low key savage. She isn't thirsty for Cheryl's power in real life but she does want to make a statement and be heard and to win this battle over the town cult. It made sense once I saw it in front of me.

Cheryl is Heather Chandler. Period.

And again they didn't really focus on their actual production of Heathers and that particular cast but let me say this rn. If Cole Sprouse does not play JD at any point on the future, the world is cancelled. I really didn't think he would ever sing in these kind of episodes or at all, because the show does have the actors perform on occasion. However, when they announced this was happening, I had a glimmer of hope that Jughead would play JD because it makes so much sense...and then he didn't...and then he sang Seventeen anyways and broke my fucking heart. I'm not sure if he really was singing the entire time because the man went up an entire octave between the verse and the chorus but man I was picturing a future production of Heathers starring Cole Sprouse and Lilli Reinhart. It needs to happen. This was literally 2 minutes of the episode and idek if y'all feel the same way but man it wrecked my emotions and my OG Disney Channel stan was losing her mind over Cole Sprouse singing her favorite song from Heathers.

It's 11:47 PM so I need to wrap this up before I fall asleep and forget everything lol.

As a wrap up, I really liked this musical episode and I really liked the other one but it really grinds my effin gears when people jump to conclusions because theatre people aren't doing theatre things. Theatre is inclusive. The arts are inclusive. We can't close our walls to the select few people that "got our criteria to be in the community" (oh wait, isn't that like a cult...? I guess their plan worked).

If you've seen my other posts you know I could rant about this topic for days but long story short, if you aren't willing to not just be a part of the community and welcome everyone in and accept everything as its separate entities but still have your opinions on it without jumping to conclusions...did you eat a brain tumor for breakfast because what's your damage? ❤💛💚💙

[corgisocks]

85 questions

tagged by @ribenaflip 💞💕💖💗

rules: answer these 85 questions and tag 20 people

EDIT: as of 2019, this tag is like 20% irrelevant to what i’m like now....did it in 2017 so

— what was your last…

1. drink: water

2. phone call: it was me calling jojo’s phone so they could find it

3. text message: “I am having a major crisis”

4. song you listened to: coffee & tv by blur

5. you cried: that’s tmi but also saying it’s tmi is tmi and all of this is tmi so what am i DOING

— have you ever…

6. dated someone twice: nooo

7. kissed someone and regretted it: yes i kissed a piece of toast and it got crumbs all over my face

8. been cheated on: if i have been that’d be concerning seeing as i’ve never not been single

9. lost someone special: not recently.

10. been depressed: 24 hours 7 days a week m8

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: what is an alcohol? (no)

— fave colours

12. vermilion 13. cerulean 14. very very dark grey

— in the last year have you…

15. made new friends: YEET (shoutout to the gc)

16. fallen out of love: i WISH (lmao it’s been 2 years please end me)

17. laughed until you cried: yea obvs

18. found out someone was talking about you: many times. many many many times.

19. met someone who has positively changed you: YES. my bestest buddy has and not in a bad way. i’m definitely a better and happier person because i met him

20. found out who your friends are: i never think about friendships in that kind of way. and if i did i probs wouldn’t care to be like ‘they were a shitty friend’ instead it’d just be like they were someone in my life and it sucks that they’re not/don’t want to be in a good way anymore but shit happens. and i don’t take it personally

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list: what is a face book because if it’s like a book of faces i kissed myself in the picture of my group of friends that is in my yearbook

— general

22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know irl: again…what is a face book

23. do you have any pets: YEET

24. do you want to change your name: i mean idk i think i’d be cool with just usin a nickname for now i’ll figure the legal stuff out later

25. what did you do for your last birthday: went to my friend’s birthday party. spent almost all of it looking for one of the people who was invited with two of my bros. then i saw wonder woman, went to a reallyreally good korean bakery, and then went to the empire state building. and last but not least, the next day, my friends came over and we played clue and mariokart. all in all it was a 10/10 birthday tbh! (it was an anomaly though ngl my birthday this year is going to be infinitely more depressing)

26. what time did you wake up today: 5:30 am cos my school starts too fuckin early ;(

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: taking a shower

28. what is something you can’t wait for: plake’s upcoming single (it’s my fav and i’ve been wanting it in my library for m o n t h s so i’m 110% ready for it

30. what are you listening to right now: the sound of people talking

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom: i was at an improv comedy show and of all people i was picked to volunteer and when i was on stage my shoe fell off and one of the comedians who was called tom was like 'your foot has been borne to the audience’

32. something that’s getting on your nerves: my own exhaustion!

33. most visited website: my school’s online gradebook 😬

34. hair colour: really dark brown (some people think it’s black but NO)

35. long or short hair: short...it will never be long again i assure you

36. do you have a crush on someone: yes ;(((

37a. what do you like about yourself: i may be an awful person atm but at least i can understand why i am the way i am and know how to improve

37b. what’s something you don’t like about yourself: too many things. rn though i don’t like how i come off as like a 'show-off’ when i’m trying to help people cos me trying to get them to like actually understand what they’re learning always sets em off even though it’d be worse to just do things my own confusing way and leave em in the dust. i also hate how i get frustrated with them (and myself tbh) when that happens

38. want any piercings: hecc no

39. blood type: i legit have no clue

40. nicknames: lou, coco

41. relationship status: what is a relation ship

42. sign: gemini

43. pronouns: he/they i GUESS

44. fave tv show: peppa pig tbh

45. tattoos: hecc no!

46. right or left handed: BOTH

47: ever had surgery: nope 😬

48. piercings: once again HECC NO

49. sport: used to do tennis and track. now i kind of just do a lil bit of everything for fun and i love biking and running

50. vacation: yes please. i need a vacation from LIFE

51. trainers: i’ve had the same old black nikes for three years and the same flip flops for five ;( (and i also have some black converse high-tops that i never wear unless i need to look 'nice’ whoops)

— more general

52. eating: i prefer raw foods to pretty much everything so poke bowls are my jam. i’m also a vegetarian who doesn’t eat fruit because what is self-care??

53. drinking: water. it’s important to stay hydrated

54. i’m about to watch: my surroundings that aren’t my phone

55. waiting for: this tag to be over. yikes

56. want: to pass english for ONE GODDAMN MARKING PERIOD before i graduate cos i haven’t since mp1 of ninth grade during which i got a 99 (now i have a 15 look how far i’ve come!!)

57. get married: i mean…

58. career: ah yes i’ll probably have one of those

— which is better

59. hugs or kisses: y'all mean in relationships? no pref. generally speaking though i almost always hate both

60. lips or eyes: no pref

61. shorter or taller: no pref…

62. older or younger: i don’t think about any of this shit i am so confused!!

63. nice arms or stomach: what constitutes an arm or stomach being nice?

64. hookup or relationships: labels ew neither is good

65. troublemaker or hesitant: somehow i’m both. like i’m loud as fuck and kind of obnoxious and audacious but i also have 9.9/10 self-control. so like i would be cool with either type of person

— have you ever

66. kissed a stranger: i hope not

67. drank hard liquor: hecc no

68. turned someone down: i thought i was gonna have to but that never happened WHEW

69. sex on first date: what is this “sex” you speak of? what is a “date”?

70: broken someone’s heart: i hope not! except hearts are kinda squishy so like i probably haven’t

71. had your heart broken: no although my heart rate’s so high i fear it will explode one of these days

72. been arrested: so far, no

73. cried when someone died: :((( chris cornell. i was lookin up soundgarden on google to find tour dates near where my uncle lives and then i saw it and i was like 'no. nononono. nonononononononono.’ then i let one tear escape from the ducts in my eyes before going into denial river. (aren’t i so fuckin clever 😤😤😤)

i also cried during a tribute to chester bennington at a muse concert if that counts

74. fallen for a friend: once again ew labels but y'all should know by now that i HAVE and i’m STILL falling ;(

— do you believe in

75. yourself: i have no concept of anything in existence and this tag has made me realise that. whoops

76. miracles: i could ramble about this one but i don’t have the time

77. love at first sight: dunno, but i will say that when i met my best friend i knew i was going to love him from how he acted and what his sense of humour is like. he’s so unique really like you can TELL he’s his own person and he owns it without trying to

78. santa claus: yes but only cos i’m tryin to stay off the naughty list

79. angels: what is an angels

— misc

80. eye colour: this is a subject that has been widely debated so for now i’ll just say they’re either grey or green or both

81. best friend’s name: zeke

82. favourite movie: i have no concept of having a favorite movie unless it’s based on who it’s by so i’ll say my favorite pixar movie is wall-e for the sake of having something down for this question. otherwise it’s probs either memento or the imitation game.

83. favourite actor: myself 🤔

84. favourite cartoon: oh shit that’s too hard. my favs as a young child were tom and jerry and the first season of the pokémon anime and i guess my fav one that’s more 'mature’ is bojack horseman (although i’ve only seen half the first season lol)

85. favourite teacher’s name: my favorite is either nicole, hyungmin, rebecca, eileen, hayley, matt, kevin, or robert, but like…i hate picking cos that’s just unfair. so idrk

can’t tag rn but do this if you want to i guess

[maryniss]

How Does Waiting Sound?

Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs

Summary:   How did Dazai named his ability?

Why won't Oda leave Dazai?

***

On a last mission before leaving the Port Mafia, Dazai and Chuuya finally find the perfect name for Dazai's ability.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Relationships: 

Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs)

Dazai Osamu&Oda Sakunosuke (Bungou Stray Dogs)

Characters:

Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs) Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs) Oda Sakunosuke (Bungou Stray Dogs) Original Female Character(s) Yoko Ogawa

Tags: oh boy here we go - Freeform;thats why i dont like writing long fics because of the tags;anyway;Drugs;Drugs Made Them Do It;Underage Drinking;does chuuya care they are underage?fucking no;oh yeah;Swearing;Angst;Light Angst;Fluff;Nakahara Chuuya is ticklish;Blood and Violence;i selected blood kink accidentally there are no kinks here;Murder Family;Odasaku Hunts Dazai's Thoughts;Riding Motorcycles(aka Jenna)’Motorcycles;I love Chuua's motorbike as much as I love cherry's carla’Port Mafia Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs);But he quits the very next day so not pm dazai really idk;Tags Are Hard;i wrote this because the thought of how dazai named his ability kept me up at night;and yeh;I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping;soukoku kiss i forgot to tell y'all that;Gentle Kissing

Notes: Pfff...cant believe i finished this im so happy rn. so i have one important thing to say before.

YOKO OGAWA is a real Japanese writer. This here doesn't make any assumptions about her real life persona, this is only a fanfic. That is all.

OK, yo now lets see. So, what is this fic really about? idk but soukoku kiss so im happy with that.listened to this while writing hehe

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4mIVbG8EnA6JgSqzgk87pA?si=LVJB_uZyRQqIIMejQeSzgg

           Dazai smiles, even if he is not happy.

           Dazai smiles because he is happy.

           Dazai never cries.

           He smiled at that moment when his life changed. That day when he got a good beating from a child much smaller than him (even if that stubborn redhead would never agree with him about their height)

           Dazai always thought that he was special. He was indeed. After all, the people around him were human. They died. Everyday. Every single day, before his eyes. Sometimes, he killed them himself. Other times, he had to witness blood shed from afar.

           It still hurt. But, he got used to it. He was strong enough to do so. It was like he didn’t feel it anymore, actually. Just like when you get used to the sound of a broken clock; it is as if it never existed in the first place.

           But, Dazai felt something, he was just burrowed too deep into his thoughts to reach his feelings. He... he felt like he was...

           No Longer Human. Dazai spent a lot of time thinking about the name of his ability (and, no, we would never tell anyone how it got that name; personal reasons) and he concluded that it fit perfectly.

           Walking down on a random street, Dazai thought about it again. Actually, he had told somebody about the origin of his ability’s name. The sun threw pretty, orange, almost transparent curtains of light, making Dazai seem like an angel that has just ascended from Hell.

           He stopped and looked around himself. He knew that his instincts would not fool him; he knew the street he was on.

           If he turned around the corner, he would find the bar, the same as always. Unchanged, as his feelings. 

           He hated himself. Not only when he was going to the bar, even though he promised himself that he would never go there again. Not only when he let everyone around him down. Not only when he did what he thought was right instead of what he wanted.

           He hated himself in general. And, to tell you a secret, there was only one other person Dazai hated. 

           He entered in the bar and, as always he saw Oda sitting there.

           “Were have you been? You are late! , “smiled his friend with a drink already prepared in his hand.

           Dazai sat down in the cold and empty room. He did not have time to tell Odasaku how he got to name his ability. 

           “The usual?, “ asked the bartender.

           “Mhm, sure.” 

           Dazai relaxed against the back of the chair. There was a clock in that room, but it was broken. 

           “Hard day?” Odasaku’s tone was concerned. Dazai smiled to himself and nodded.

           “Kind of. How about you?”

           “Nothing special.”

           The barman brought two glasses of whiskey and put them on the table. Dazai looked at them and saw nothing, nothing more than the person who should have drank that, right next to him.

           “You know, actually, there is something that I want to tell you.”

           Oda left his glass back on the counter and smiled at Dazai. 

           “Do tell. I am pretty bored. What could happen that would make you want to talk like that, so suddenly?” 

           Tik-tok-tik-tik-tok. The clock on the wall sang its broken song.

           “It’s not a so good story; but I want to tell you.”

           “Ok, I am listening, Dazai.”

           The brown-haired man inhaled deeply and looked at the glass in his hand. He then drank it all and slammed it against the table. The drink next to him was untouched. Dazai called for the bartender and ordered two more drinks. 

           “Ok, so where should I start?” Tik-tik-tok-tok-tik-tok.

           “From where you see fit.”

           Dazai tried to remember. The details of the day his life had once again taken a 180 turn. It        was late spring, or maybe already summer, and the sun was setting almost shyly. 

           “Yeah, it was a golden afternoon. And the sun was smiling down upon…”

           “Wait, I already know this story.” Dazai looked puzzled. He was sure he never told Oda this one. Their drinks were waiting on the counter. Tree, in total and one empty glass.

           “Are you sure? I don’t remember...”

           “No, I don’t actually know this one in particular. But, I do know who this is about.”

           Dazai understood then and he smiled melancholically. The Oda in his hallucinations really knew him that well, huh? He bet that the real one would have also guessed.

           “Whenever you talk about that person, you get all poetic and dramatic, as you are covering yourself with another layer of protection, so that no one can see into your heart. “

           Dazai gulped and took a mouthful of whiskey. The alcohol burned down his throat, and then up again to his brain. It was not a big problem; Dazai could handle his drinks quite well (or so he thought).

           “Well, you are right, but you’ll hear me anyway, right? It’s not like you have a place to be. And this one it’s not like all the stories about Chuuya that I told you before.” 

           Dazai may sound all confident when he talked; but deep in his heart, in that numb place of his heart, where he could not reach his frozen emotions, he was scared. If he would had have problems with his kidneys, he would probably piss himself very often and not only because of his disease.

           Oda sighed and the clock on the wall did too. The sound of something that doesn’t function anymore.

           “Of course, go on. I won’t interrupt you anymore.”

***

           “Oi, I can’t believe that old geezer! Putting us to work when he is relaxing in some exotic country! ,”said Chuuya, not so subtly, drawing other’s people attention. The afternoon sun was making him look like an angel that had just descended from Heaven. His hair was high-up in a ponytail and it was the first time Dazai saw him without his hat.

           He was beautiful, not that Dazai would ever admit that to Chuuya, god no! He wouldn’t even admit it to himself. He always caught himself staring; against his own will, of course. He liked to look into Chuuya’s eyes. Because he felt like they were alike. They tried to hide their feelings; or, better said, never got a chance to expose them in the first place.

           Chuuya’s eyes were always full of light. Nor hatred, nor any other emotion tainted them. They were pure and Dazai admired him for that. He would never tell Chuuya that, again, that was a very big no.

           But, it was something. To have eyes blue like the sea, like the reflection of a world full of freedom, like the blue sky Dazai could never see completely. Everything was written there.

           “Now, where is that building and those bastards? Let’s kick their assess quicker, ‘cause I wanna   drink something.” Dazai smiled at his partner and showed him to turn left.

           “Oh, Chuuya, but you are still underage! You can’t drink! , “ said Dazai, being surprised at his own words. It was not like him to make such comments. Irrational and not funny at all.

           “You really are dumb, right? If I am going to go beat some guys and steal whatever, I am sure that I am allowed to drink. It’s not like I have respected the law before.”

           They walked down a dark alley, chatting or fighting or both at the same time, because that’s how their conversations usually work. Dazai telling Chuuya that he liked his shoes; Chuuya checking to see if he really did take his good pair today;  Dazai shattering all of his hopes down and laughing everything off; and then Chuuya smacking his partner and mumbling not-so-beautiful nicknames.

           That’s how they work. Like a broken clock.

           But, even broken clocks strike sometimes the right hour. They may have seem to not pay attention around them, but it was quite the opposite actually.

           They knew they reached their destination, so they tried to focus on the shadows around them; on the sounds of steps that were so loud, even if both Chuuya and Dazai could feel the effort of the people following them to not be heard.

           They silently looked at each other.

           “We finish this fast and then we go to drink somethin’?”

           “Ok, but if you get drunk you’ll let me drive your motorcycle.” Chuuya seemed to hesitate, but he also didn’t want to go drinking alone. He was not afraid or something, it just felt lonely…

           They finally reached the building from where they were supposed to extract…

           “What are we supposed to take from here? , “ whispered Chuuya. “ Is there some human trafficking that we should take care of?”

           “I think that somebody took something from Mori-san, like documents or boring things like that, “whispered Dazai back.

           “I swear that I’ll kill that man if he ever sends me to bring him some piece of paper.” Dazai chuckled and looked one more time at the building.

           Yeah, of course it had to be a night club. Why did fancy people (or actually people who considered themselves fancy) always came to nightclubs? Where were they supposed to search for those papers? In somebody’s underwear, or what?      

           And this one didn’t look like a very expensive one. The big sigh with “ NightClub Insomnia” shined pink and green, those cheap neon ones. The windows were dark, so you could not see inside. Or maybe there were just some thick curtains.

           Chuuya moved forward and stopped, making  a disgusted face.

           “Eww, here smells like piss and bear.”

           “Let’s go inside then, though I think that there smells even worse, “  answered Dazai. The moon was already high in the sky, illuminating Chuuya’s fragile silhouette. The brown-haired man almost laughed at himself. Fragile? Yeah, sure. He should say that after he beats Chuuya at a one-on-one fight; though he liked when he is being pinned down, and when the redhead smirks triumphantly from above him, his long hair almost brushing over Dazai’s lips…

           “Are we going or are you afraid that you’ll be kicked out because you are  a minor?”

           Dazai snapped out of his dreams and focused on the mission at hand. After they are done, he would go with Chuuya to drink. And he has time to admire his partner (and hate himself for doing so) afterwards.

           “Well, if the police catches us, we can just beat them.”

           And, so, Dazai and Chuuya entered on the club’s door.

           From afar, Yoko Ogawa was observing them. She gestured and her guardians nodded.

           The woman resisted licking her lips ( a nervous tic that she has since she was little)  as she looked at the two young boys trying to make their way through the crowd. The night has only started, and she already had them where she wanted.

           Lights, loud music, neon colors, dancing, people and sweat, drugs, drinking, and the smell of cheap wine and beer, mixed with another one that Chuuya had sensed since he first arrived. An old woman sitting in the corner, wishing she had listened to her wife. She should have took some lip balm with him.

           Well, it was not so important. Because, that night was the night she would catch the Double Black. Soukoku. She would be the one to do so.

           Soukoku, huh? Just a bunch of kiddos. Yoko Ogawa had two reasons that forced her to break her first marriage, and another two that forced him to get married again with her second wife, the one that was always telling her to use lip balm.

           The first reason that determined her to divorce from his wife was that she was not good with children. She didn’t have the patience, the determination to play with such despicable creatures.

           And there was another one… oh yeah. Because she accidentally killed his children.

           Well, this was her wife’s fault! She should have not left her with them!

           She did once, she could do it again. She whispered: “You are dead, Soukoku”, but the club’s liveliness made his words seem dull and not true at all.

***

             There are 3 glasses still full of whiskey on the table. There are 3 glasses with only the ice left in them.

           “It’s pretty hard to tell this story in the 3rd person,” sighs Dazai, propping his head in his hand. The room is still empty and cold; he gathers all the drink in one place and puts them in a circle.  

           “Why are you telling it in 3rd person then? You can… , “ he stopped and reached for the glasses that Dazai was playing with. “ That’s mine, you can order more if you want to do whatever you were doing with them.”

           “Ok, ok here you are.”

           “Thanks. So, why are you not using the first person?”

           “Well, that’s because this is not only my story. You’ll see.”

           The clock made a disharmonic sound. The room was quiet then for a while and Dazai took another deep breath. That was the moment that their plan to go drinking went wrong. Though Dazai got to ride Chuuya’s motorbike afterwards.

***

           “You were right, it really does smell worse here,” yelled Chuuya, trying to make himself heard over the sound of the tasteless music that some DJ- Chuuya would very much like to go and teach that DJ what good music was supposed to sound like- was playing.

           “I don’t know what you are saying. This smell kind of reminds me of your apartment. There is the same smell of cheap wine and…”

           “That’s because of a certain someone only buying me wine at the smallest price!”

           “You should go buy your own wine then!” A woman, almost naked of course, approached Dazai and put her hands on his shoulders. The brown-haired man pushed the woman away; her breath was smelling like beer and there was another odor, a musky and sour one that made Dazai scrunch his nose.

           “I am sorry, but I have no such tastes in women,” said Dazai and went on, trying to catch up with Chuuya. He could his small partner ahead of him, avoiding the strippers that were coming for him like a wild group of animals comes for its prey.

           “Chuuya, look there!,” shouted Dazai, trying to get the chibi’s attention. Chuuya turned to him and followed the direction that Dazai was showing with his hand.

           There were the men that they had to meet to retrieve the documents. Port Mafia didn’t like to spill blood uselessly. So, Mori-san gave them the order to try and negotiate first for the documents, giving them some money in return.

           Neither Dazai, nor Chuuya understood the old man. They could just beat those guys and take the documents and that was.

           It was almost as if there was something that they didn’t know; as if they were fooled; as if they were going right inside a trap.

           Yeah, Dazai knew that was very probably. A trap. He was more than sure about it. He didn’t know if Chuuya realized this; but he trusted his partner. He knew that Chuuya could protect himself, even if he was being in disadvantage. For fuck’s sake, Chuuya was literally a god, so Dazai should not worry about the redhead so much.

           The brown-haired man looked around. An elegant dressed woman, wearing red lipstick, her hair tied up in a practical bun, sitting on a celadon sofa, that was probably bought from the SecondHand shop next to the club; Dazai could tell that the sofa was not very comfortable, but what could you expect from such a place? She didn’t seem like a bad person. Besides her, there were two women. Dazai scanned them quickly. A gun hung loosely next to their hip. It was pretty dark, but Dazai could also see the shine of some small, sharp blades. Total: around six. There could also be some hidden ones, in their boots, their hair and maybe even a small bomb in their mouth. He was not so sure, but they needed to pay attention.

           Chuuya and Dazai looked at each other. After years of missions when they needed to be silent, they developed some kind of secret language only between two them; almost like they could reach each other’s minds and pull out the thoughts directly from there.

           “Do they pose a threat to us?”

           “Maybe to you, I am capable of protecting myself.”            “Ok, but you won’t let me die this time, no?”

           “…did I ever let you down, Dazai?”

           Dazai smiled.

           “No, chibi, let’s go. We do this quick and then we go to that new bar, right?”

           “I swear, if you call me…” Chuuya stopped mid-sentence, looking somewhere between Dazai. He blinked four times and then he took hold of Dazai’s hand.

           “We gotta go, Dazai. This is not ok. Fuck the files, this is a big ass trap. We haven’t been careful enough…”

           Dazai turned to see what frightened Chuuya so. He blinked himself, telling himself that it was impossible. This mission should have been an easy one. What kind of Ability User did they have the luck to stumble across this time?

           The club was slowly melting, its walls, people and everything peeling down, letting bright sunlight come in.

           “Come on, Dazai, move!” The brown-haired man needn’t be told twice. It was not like them to run; normally, Dazai would not run with Chuuya. But, that day was the last day when he would be recognized, officially, as a member of the Port Mafia. He did not want to go around, killing people as some kind of maniac.

           He was crazy, he knew that already. But, even crazy people had their moments. Just like broken clocks.

           And, Chuuya always run. Not because there was something that he could not handle. Dazai bet that his partner could fight with a dragon from those fairytales Oda used to read kids before sleep and he would win, without even scratching himself. Maybe he was foolish and greedy to think that Chuuya was scared for him, for Dazai; maybe he was just blinded by the light coming from Chuuya’s eyes to think that the redhead really did care for him that much.

           “Ok, Chuuya, let’s go.” They did not get out in time. They didn’t and Dazai is somewhat glad because of that.

***

           “Could you just bring me an entire bottle? I am feeling bad for always telling you to bring two more glasses of whiskey,” chuckled Dazai, not a hint of nervousness in his tone. The barman nodded. Dazai looked at the bar’s door and then at the clock on the wall. He could almost hear Ango coming in, mumbling something to himself, and then taking a seat next to Dazai, sighing and ordering something to drink.

           Dazai knew that he would never come here again.

           “Well, what happened then? Why did you stop?” Oda looked at him with tired eyes, yet ready to find out whatever Dazai wanted to tell him.

           “Just a moment of silence. I thought about my friend who died right before this story took place.” Tik-tok-tok-tik…

           “Oh? Do I know them? Who is this friend of yours?”

           “You.”

           The bartender came with two bottles in his hands and put them on the counter.

           “I only said one, though.”

           “The other one is for the man right there,” said he, nodding towards the empty chair where Odasaku should have been.

           “There is no one there.” The bartender lifted his shoulders and shook his head. He filled his arms with the empty glasses Dazai had drank and smiled fondly at the only client that was still coming to his bar. And then he left, leaving Dazai with the sound of a broken clock and his very own hallucinations.

           “I can’t believe that you didn’t order one bottle for me,” laughed Oda, punching Dazai lightly. The brown-haired man sighed; it really was a mistake to come there, but it didn’t matter anymore.

           “Old men can’t handle their drinks,” answered he, sipping the remaining whiskey from his glass.

           “Hey, I’m only five years older than you.”

           “You are…” Dazai bit his tongue. He almost said “dead”. “Ok, let’s continue the story, then. If not, I feel like I am going to fall asleep and you will never know what happened.” Oda nodded and Dazai started to tell his story again.

***

           Chuuya and Dazai did not stop to look; they had enough experience to be able to apply the rule number 1 in such cases: never look. You can think about it afterwards. First survive.

            The club was collapsing, the people transforming into thin smoke threads. Glass shattered on the floor had also started to disappear and then there was no sign of the location where Dazai and Chuuya should have had a nice and reasonable conversation to take back those documents.

           They were now on an island, both of them could hear the distinctly sound of waves of the sea. Seagulls flew above them and as both of them stared up, at the blinding sun, at the clear, blue, day sky, somebody approached them.

           “Welcome! My dear kids, this is the Memory Police! Couldn’t be more happy to have you here!”

           Chuuya and Dazai turned back and faced the woman they saw in the club. She was alone this time. The two exchanged a look.

           “She is the Ability User.”

           “Well, we are not very happy that we are here so,let’s go back so we can take those documents and bring them to our boss.” The woman smiled; now Dazai saw that she was not wearing red lipstick, but a purple one. She didn’t look as pretty as before.

           “You know that you can’t keep us here with only an Ability, right?, “continued Dazai, all while shooting his most charming smile at the woman.

           He was more than sure that the island they were on was part of her ability, so one touch and it would probably vanish. Actually, he was standing on it already, so it was probably already melting, but given that it was such a big object it would take longer for it to go away. But, whatever other spells there were hidden on the island, Dazai nullified them all.

           “Oh, I do know that, which is why I don’t intend on keeping you here…”

           Chuuya was done listening to the woman’s crap. “What the…,” he threw some gravity discs in her direction, “fuck do you want?” The woman didn’t even move; she raised her arm and made a swift motion, as if she was at a concert and she was the bandmaster.  The discs vanished. Chuuya and Dazai were left looking at her surprised; but then they remember the number one rule, the golden rule they must always follow.

           They had to do something, but what could they? Why wasn’t Dazai’s ability working already? And what was that from before? Could the woman also nullify somebody’s gift? There were too many questions and Dazai had the answer to only one of it.

           No, the woman didn’t have the same ability as Dazai, because that would mean that there was somebody else, another Ability User that brought them to the island. Also, she didn’t even had to touch the discs, they simply went voosh and bye-bye Chuuya’s attack. So, it had to be the island. Maybe this was like some sort of environment where she was able to do whatever she pleased and whatever satisfied her. In other words, a secluded space where she ruled every single rock, every single tiny bit of sand, every single force and every single person.

           Well, that would have been bad, if only Dazai wasn’t there. After all, that was his job: to make him and Chuuya un-vulnerable to such attacks. But, why was it not working? Maybe he should get closer to the woman, maybe if he touched her…

           “Chuuya, let’s do the thing we did then, when we had to steal those diamonds…you know.” The redhead looked at his partner. He sometimes couldn’t believe that such a fragile person (even though Dazai was much taller than him, but we do NOT talk about that here, in the Port Mafia gang) could make his world so much more than the red angry he used to see. That was before he met Dazai. After that, after they became a team, there was always a black dot in Chuuya’s red world that was jumping and fooling around, making the boy’s head spun.

           Chuuya hated that little, tiny, stupid thing! He hated it for confusing him so!

           But, it was nice. To be able to see something else than red. Something else than blind anger.

              “Are you sure it’s gonna work?” Chuuya asked just because he was used to do so. He trusted his partner completely, meaning that he would follow whatever plans Dazai came up with.

           “Have I ever let you down, chibi?”

           Chuuya smiled. Did he really hate that Dazai called him chibi? Yes.

           “Well, if you say so…but don’t call me that anymore.”

           Chuuya smiled. Did he really hate that Dazai called him chibi? No.

           Dazai winked and the redhead rolled his eyes. From somewhere very close to them, they could hear the waves crashing onto whatever they were sitting on (an island, an ability or a giant lion-turtle with magical powers). The seagulls seemed agitated – maybe a storm was coming.

           “Well, lady, we would love to stay, but he have to go.” Dazai backed a few feet away, discovering that Chuuya was no more by his side. He could see the hole that his partner dug for them to escape, the sand starting to cover it up already.

           “Oh no, I am afraid I can’t do that.” Yoko Ogawa smiled.

           ‘You see, this is my island. Not some playground for such bastards like you.”

           And, suddenly, Chuuya was above Dazai’s head floating in the air and the brown-haired could see that he was not using his ability. The redhead looked down and wriggled his legs, he tried to come down but to no use; he got the same feeling as when he was a kid and he couldn’t control his ability.  But, now, it wasn’t he that was the problem.

           “Dazai, do something!”

           Dazai looked at his partner and there were a hundred thought that flooded onto him at the same time. Unfortunately, his instincts took over before he could react rationally. Dazai shot Yoko; she didn’t dodge, she just stopped the bullet with her very own hand.

           The little piece of metal was not on the island anymore. When she opened her palm, there was no sign of her previous action; the skin was  fine. That did not surprise Dazai. He had a vague idea of what the woman’s ability was…

           “DAZAI. I swear to god, I-“

           “Shh, little Chuuya,” said Dazai flashing a snakey smile at his friend, “the adults are trying to solve this.”

           Yoko Ogawa laughed. The seagulls flew over their heads, not a care in the world. Did they care that Chuuya was hanging seven meters high up in the air and something happened to his ability?

           No! And guess who also did not? Dazai. Or at least, that’s what Chuuya thought.

           “You consider yourself an adult? Please, you can’t even drink legally.”

           “Well, maybe that’s true, but I still think like one. For example, your ability. What do I know about it? That it’s called “Memory Police”. Why I don’t know and I don’t care but I definitely won’t be coming to you to help me choose the name of my ability.” Dazai looked around discreetly. There really was no one around. Now, there was no turning back, anyway. He would just tell the woman what he knew and he would try to resonate with her. If not, there was Chuuya; he knew that he was not alone.

           “Oh and also, this island or whatever this is… this sand is not part of your ability. I don’t know, you probably put it here, but this is not a real island.”            If Yoko Ogawa was impressed, she didn’t show it.

           “You control everything here: even gravity, that’s what Chuuya can’t use his ability. Or, better said, using his ability doesn’t have any effect.”

           “Well, aren’t you a clever one?” Yoko looked at Chuuya and with another swift motion of her hand, she let him down. The redhead almost smashed head first if Dazai didn’t run to catch him.

           He did not fall into Dazai’s arm, unfortunately, because his long cultivated instincts kicked in and at the last moment he made a pillow of air to sustain himself and then he let himself down carefully.

           “You really are clever, but too bad you won’t be around here anymore to see the rest of the story.”

           “What…?” Dazai then realized. It was like a premonition; he knew what would happen and it really did happen like that: in the next three seconds, he was thrown around in a black hole, and he was back in  the club. The loud music (who played such bad music? Dazai should teach them a lesson later) and the neon lights were messing with his head; he felt like throwing up.

           “Wake up, pretty boy ‘cause mama has to give you some pills. You’ll feel better then.”

           A voice that Dazai very much did not like was the only thing he heard before he fell asleep. His last thoughts ran off to Chuuya.

           Dazai hated himself in general, but now that he had left Chuuya alone, his hatred towards himself seemed to increase. A little.

***                                                                                                                

           Dazai woke up on the island; he felt his limbs numb, and he tried to move them. He couldn’t, and that didn’t surprise him so much. The memories of what happened yesterday (had it already passed a day? It was hard to tell) came to him slowly and he opened his eyes, even if the bright light was uncomfortable.

           He could hear the seagulls, the waves of the sea; and he could smell the salty wind. His eyes started to adjust, but his vision was still a bit hazy. Dazai could see that he was somewhere above the ground, in a metal cage. He did not see Yoko Ogawa.

           “Chuuya. Where is Chuuya?”

            Dazai found the answer to his question in no time. In the same cage as him, too far away for Dazai to reach and touch him, there was Chuuya, breathing hard. His head was hanging loosely and the red hair covered almost all of his face. He could see that Chuuya was trembling and he could also see the sweat glistening off him in the light of the artificial sun. Chuuya never sweated. Dazai suspected that both of them had been drugged.

           “Chuuya…Hey, Chuuya,” whispered Dazai, his voice going hoarse in the middle of the sentence. The redhead didn’t move. His hands were pinned above his head, cuffed with iron chains covering his small palms completely. His long-sleeved shirt revealed some delicate skin; and Dazai then saw it.

           How could he not from the start, he didn’t know. Chuuya’s hands where covered in that red, snake-like pattern that Dazai did very much not like; the stripes seemed alive, as if there was something impure lurking under his skin, some kind of disease, some kind of  filthy demon. Dazai shuddered.

            So, his partner used Corruption. What was he thinking? Didn’t he knew that the woman controlled everything on the island? That he had no chance of winning?

           But, why was he not doing anything now? How much time has passed since Chuuya was in that state? Again, Dazai was left with too many unanswered questions.

           He tried to calm himself. He looked above himself and saw that his hands were also pinned up like Chuuya’s. He tried to think logically; would Chuuya use Corruption if Dazai was not around, if he hadn’t chance to come back to his human-self? No. That was for sure.

           Which meant that it had to do either with the island, with Yoko Ogawa’s ability or with the fact that they both have been drugged. Dazai chose the second option. So, what was it? What kind of drug? He could only take guess: maybe it was something that brought Corruption to surface; and even if Chuuya tried to use the ability, he could not, because Yoko was controlling the gravity around him, so that he could not escape.

           So, the woman was probably around here. Dazai should be careful about what he was saying, about how he revealed his plans to Chuuya. But, Yoko Ogawa didn’t know that Dazai figured that much, so maybe he could use that to his advantage.

           A seagull stopped on the cage, making it move a little.

           “Are you awake already?” The voice came from down, from under the cage. It made sense; it was the only place where Dazai could not see. The brown-haired man didn’t say anything, and the other part also stopped asking questions.

           Right now, Dazai had one big problem; he needed to touch Chuuya, so that he could deactivate Corruption. But, how? He didn’t even feel his hands. He didn’t feel his whole body, damn it!

           “Chuuya, are you awake?, “ asked Dazai, but he got no response. He knew that the woman was clever; she did manage to bring them into this situation, after all,  so he had to be careful.

           “Chuuya!” This time, Dazai called his friend loud enough that it was impossible for Yoko not to hear.

           “Oh, so you are awake. Then shall I explain the situation you are into right now? You have to understand the rules of the game form the start, so that you don’t make any mistakes.” Dazai tried moving his fingers, but he wasn’t sure if he succeeded or not; they were like a piece of meat attached to his body with a rope. Useless.

           “If you would be so kind.” Dazai could almost hear the smile in the woman’s voice as she spoke.

           “Well, I think that you figured pretty much already, but I am too excited so I am going to tell it to you once more. So, you both have been given a drug. Yours is just something plain, and it was not administrated in a big quantity; you still need to see this plan unfold right before your eyes and you can’t be high for that to happen.” She stopped and took a deep breath. She seemed to be happy with herself. At the same time, Chuuya made a slight movement, but Dazai saw it. His friend was starting to wake up. It was going good.

           “And, well maybe you asked yourself: what does that drug exactly do? And maybe you thought that it brings out the god-form of your partner. And you are right, but not entirely. Because this drug doesn’t only bring your partner’s inner demon…”

           Dazai clenched his teeth. Chuuya was more of a human that that woman would ever be. Chuuya was not a demon; maybe he looked like one, maybe he sometimes acted like one (only around Dazai though), but he was not a demon.

           How should Dazai put this? He always found himself admiring Chuuya, that succeeded in keeping his humanity, even when he had the powers of a god. Dazai couldn’t even do that, he, a regular person.

           Chuuya was more human than Dazai would ever be.

           “…it forces the kid to fight with it.” Dazai almost missed the last part as he tried to escape from his shackles. He stopped his action at once. What did Yoko mean?

           Suddenly, Chuuya jerked forward. His chains hit the metal bars of the cage and clinked; like the bells on a wedding day. It was as a veil had been put over Dazai’s eyes, over his intern logic. He felt physical pain by just looking at Chuuya, just by looking at his small partner struggling like a trapped animal, his body spasming uncontrollably. And, all Dazai could do was watch.

           Dazai always thought that he was special. He was indeed. After all, the people around him were human. They died. Everyday. Every single day, before his eyes. Sometimes, he killed them himself. Other times, he had to witness blood shed from afar.

           Chuuya cried in pain. He was breathing hard, almost chocking on something that was not there. His eyes were hollow; two white, milky spheres, showing no emotion, empty. There was a liquid rolling down his cheeks, from his eyes, something like tears, but with a coarse density. Chuuya was shaking and crying and Dazai could not do anything.

           “See, this is the thing the drug does. He will die in no time.”

           It still hurt. But, he got used to it. He was strong enough to do so. It was like he didn’t feel it anymore, actually.

           No, this time, Dazai would not get over it. He just lost Odasaku. He could not lose Chuuya. Not him. Not him, not him, not him…

           His head was spinning. He lied, he lied. Dazai fucking lied! He felt it all, he felt the pain, he felt the guilt of his past actions hanging around his neck, suffocating him every time he tried to go down, towards the mortal world, towards what he loves. He hated it.

           Dazai fainted. Right then and right there. It was too much, too much, too much, even for him. Tears poured out of his close eyes; he had finally let his guard down.

           The seagulls sang a song only for the two of them; only for Chuuya and Dazai to hear. The birds sang in their crooked voice; they sounded like a broken clock.

           Chuuya fainted from all the pain shortly after his partner, but he knew he was not going to die. After all, he had somebody else to protect from death.

***

           Dazai woke up in white room. To be honest, he had first thought that he died. That was how he always thought the afterlife would look like.

                       Well, he would have definitely be dead if there wasn’t a certain redhead lying motionless on the floor. Suddenly, the memories of the club, of the island, of Chuuya shouting in pain came back to Dazai and he ran towards his friend.

           It couldn’t be… Were they both dead? No, no…

           He knelt down and checked Chuuya’s pulse. There was nothing. But, his partner did look normal. He didn’t have the red stripes over his body anymore. But, he was not breathing. Did they really die? Was that…

           Chuuya sit up straight, slamming his head into Dazai’s nose. The redhead coughed a fistful of blood and then wiped his mouth with a gloved hand.

           “Chuuya~!,” screamed Dazai in surprise.

           “What the fuck… Where are we?”

           Chuuya looked around, clearly confused. Actually, what was there to look at? They were literally in a room (or maybe it was a white infinity) and the boy seemed even paler than before.

           “Ah…” Chuuya shoved his head into his hands. “Don’t you tell me you actually convinced me to commit double-suicide with you!”

           The redhead took Dazai by the collar of his coat and swung him around.

           “Or, what stupid thing did you do to bring us into this kinda situation? I swear…” Dazai laughed wholeheartedly and Chuuya raised his fist. Ah, yes. The good ol’ fight between friends – or whatever they were.

           “Chuuya, don’t! Wait, let me explain!” The little boy calmed down a bit. He took a deep breath and sat on the floor, cross-legged. Or maybe it was the ceiling or another wall. He didn’t even want to think about their situation. His head hurt already so bad, and he still had to deal with the nuisance in front of him.

           “Ok, then go on, you shitty…”

           “Shh, Chuuya, don’t use such words,” said Dazai, putting his index finger on Chuuya’s lips. The redhead looked at it and his blue eyes hid emotions Dazai could not recognize. But, whatever was lying there, he could for sure say that those ocean-like orbits were luminous. So bright and so lovely, Dazai would love to drown in them. A perfect way to die, he considered. He sighed; if only Chuuya would let him.

           “OUCH! CHUUYA!” Dazai retreated his wounded finger and looked at his partner. There was a fresh, red stain on Chuuya’s lips, from the blood that had flowed out Dazai fingers; Chuuty really bit him!

           “What are you, seventh grade? A dog should not bite his master!!” As Dazai was wrapping up a small bandage over his finger, Chuuya licked his lips; such a salty taste made him shiver for some reason.

           “And, for you to know, it was not my fault. You tried to shut me up! From using cursed words or whatever… Fuck that, I always curse!”

           Dazai made a tsk-tsk sound, but said nothing more. Chuuya looked at him and sighed, laying on his back. He thought about the situation they were in. It was most likely a dream caused by the drugs he and Dazai have been injected with.

           He would not want to wake up.

           “Chuuya, let’s play a game! I’m bored! Let’s play truth or dare!”

           He would very much like to wake up.

           “Oi, Dazai, shut up I am trying to think.” No, he wasn’t but Dazai didn’t knew that.

           “Oh, ok, I’ll be quiet, you need after all some practice.” Chuuya did not say anything; every word would be like fuel to an already massive fire. He, for once, shut up.

           Did he think that Dazai would leave him alone? Yeah.

           Did Dazai leave him alone? Nope.

           “Chuuya~! Let’s play, please!! I’ve got some really good questions!”

           The redhead ignored him at first, pretending to be asleep. Of course Dazai hadn’t fallen for it. The brown-haired man decided that if that was how Chuuya would play, then he wouldn’t be nice either. With only a war-like scream, Dazai hurled over Chuuya and started to tickle his sides. Chuuya burst out in laughter, trying to push Dazai off, but without succeeding.

           “Dazai you ~haha~ little brat, if I put my hands on you!!~stop –hahah- don’t tickle me there!”

           “I’ll stop if you play Truth or Dare with me.” Chuuya continued to laugh and he chocked, but Dazai had no mercy. He tickled him until his fingers hurt.

           “Ok, ok, ~hiC~ I’ll play, get off you mother ~HIc~fucker…”

           Dazai got off in an instant, clearly pleased with himself. Chuuya tried to catch his breath; the touch of Dazai’s fingers still felt so real to him. There, on his left ribs, a little lower than his heart, where he was most ticklish. There on his stomach, where Chuuya didn’t like to be touched (he didn’t mind now tho). There on…

           What was he thinking?

           He got up, sitting with his legs crossed again. He eyes Dazai that was also standing like that, at only 4 inches away from him. He reached out and punched his friend.

           “I’ll kill you, Dazai, you shitty suicidal maniac, if you ever do that to me again!” Dazai only laughed; he was already good friends with these kind of threats; that he knew would never actually happen.

           “Ok, Chuuya, you go first!” Chuuya sighed.

           “Geez, I feel like a seventh grader, not that I’ve actually been to school before…”

           “You do have the behavior of a seventh grader, but unfortunately not the brains of one.”

           “Do you want to have no brains at all?”

           “Is this the question you are asking for the game? Then, no I don’t really, but I would rather blow them up myself. Not the best way to go, but it’s an option, I guess.”

           Chuuya shook his head. How did he end with such a moron?

           “How can we play when you are making this so difficult?” yelled Chuuya, suddenly wanting to slap Dazai. In fact, no, it wasn’t suddenly, he always wanted to slap Dazai, yes, the urge was always there. And moments like these was what it took for him to actually do it.

           “Chuu~huya, it’s not your turn anymore!” sang Dazai, smiling and provoking Chuuya with his gaze. The redhead calmed himself; he should not use his energy on that bastard after all. He sighed again; he felt like he did that too often when he was around Dazai. He did it rhythmically, like the sound of a good, completely functioning clock.

           “Ok, then you go now.” Dazai beamed and Chuuya’s heart sink; was that what made him happy?

           “Chibi…”

           “Don’t call me that.”

           “Shrimp…”

           “If you call me that, I’ll call you mackerel for the rest of our lives.”

           “My life won’t last, I’ll make sure of it so I don’t really care.”

           “Just ask the question already.”

           Dazai shot Chuuya an evil smile. The evilest smile Chuuya had ever seen. His brows furrowed. He was getting kind of scared…

           “Truth or Dare?”

           “What?” asked Chuuya, still a little bit lost into his thoughts.            

           “That’s how you play the game, chibi. Or did you not have someone to teach you that?”

           “O-of course I played before!” stuttered Chuuya and he tried to show Dazai that by looking directly into those brown-red eyes, eyes like the withered camellias in Chuuya’s room that he forgot to water. His lie didn’t get past Dazai; but the boy decided to drop it or else Chuuya might really beat him.

           “Ok then Truth or Dare?” Chuuya thought for a second.

           “Truth.” Dazai closed his eyes and put his hands together as if he was meditating. Chuuya rolled his eyes, but the corners of his mouth were still lifted upwards. Just a little bit.

           “Hm~It has to be a really good question…” Dazai sat like that for several minutes in which Chuuya just looked at him.

           He always thought Dazai was beautiful. Like a withered camellia. Don’t ask Chuuya why, he wasn’t good at poetic descriptions, Dazai just seemed like a camellia person. His hair was soft like the small petals of his favorite flower. He was even built like a camellia; slim and tall (Not so tall that Chuuya couldn’t outgrow him someday, though), a slender silhouette, that Chuuya felt like he should take care of everyday.

           Else, it would wither away.

           “Ok I know. Say Chuuya, is it true that a few days ago, when you screamed in the middle of the night was because Koyo waxed your leg?”

           Chuuya chocked on nothing. Well, that was true, but how did Dazai find out?

           “Uhm…Yeah, it’s true. It hurt like a bitch. I don’t know how women do that on a regular basis.”

           Dazai laughed out loud, startling Chuuya.

           “Why are you laughing, you miso-“ Dazai wiped a tear and lied down, looking at Chuuya upside down.

           “I am not laughing at women, I am laughing at you, ‘cause I didn’t expect you would admit it. Either way, I already knew because I was the one who set it up. I have also filmed it!”

           Chuuya was confused. He felt like Dazai would do that, he could really see him, but that was also something that he did not expect.

           “You… what?”

***

           “Dazai, I think that’s enough drinks you had there,” said Oda, visibly concerned for his friend. The bar smelled like his favorite whiskey; Dazai held a glass in his hand, the bottle the bartender had bought more than three quarters empty.

           “BOOO, you shut up, you just a hallucination…” Dazai looked at Oda through half closed eyelids. The clock on the wall made a ding-dong sound, reminding them that the midnight had come. Dazai almost jumped off his chair.

           “Dazai, stop…”begged Oda, but the brown-haired man didn’t even cared as he chugged down the bottle.

           “No, Oda, I am not here to listen to you, you are here to listen to me.”

           `I have listened to you enough. I changed my life because you said so. You can also listen to me right now.`

           Dazai didn’t say that, but it wasn’t necessary because Odasaku heard it anyway. After all, he did live in Dazai’s head.

***

           They played Truth or Dare for hours. Days maybe? They didn’t know. It was like a dream; with each question, Chuuya and Dazai would insult each other more, would find more dark secrets about each other.

           With each question, Chuuya and Dazai would love each other more.

           Right now, Chuuya was standing in Dazai’s lap, the taller man (though Chuuya still had time to overgrow him! Let’s not forget that) combing his long fingers through the red hair. It wasn’t silky, but not wiry either. It smelled like strawberries.

           The room they were in wasn’t white anymore. It was filled with their stories and with their laughter, with their love, with their hate for each other. It was more like a pretty orange-pink shade. Their voices echoed in the colorful infinity.

           “Chuuya, it’s your turn.”

           “I feel like we don’t even have what to ask each other anymore.” Dazai started braiding Chuuya’s hair gently, careful not to hurt the boy in his lap.

           “Come on, think of something.” Chuuya closed his eyes and scrunched his nose.

           “Dazai, do you really want to die? So bad that you…” Dazai’s hands stopped their movement and the room seemed to become colder. He cleared his throat; he was afraid that his voice would break when he gave Chuuya the answer. He gathered his courage and finally admitted to somebody else than himself.

           “Yes. But I’m a coward. I can’t do it. I love this world, even if it scares me. Even if it hurts. There are so many beautiful things here. And I’m just too afraid to leave them here.”

           Chuuya didn’t say anything, just placed himself better into Dazai’s lap.

           “I don’t think you are a coward. I think what you are doing is an act of dumb courage.”

           “Really?” laughed Dazai, starting to braid Chuuya’s hair again.

           “Yes. To decide to live into this world, to just live here alone… You feel lonely, don’t you? Since he died.”

           Dazai gasped. He knew who Chuuya was referring to. Was it yesterday that Odasku died? Or was it better than a week since then? Dazai couldn’t tell. But it hurt like hell. And it was still stinging his heart, like an open wound that will leave a very big scar.

           Dazai lied.

           “He was just a friend. I will get over it. I am used to this.”

           Chuuya suddenly reached for Dazai’s face and touched it with his gloved hands. It was as if they were high; high on their secrets, stories and whispers only they had ever heard.

           “Don’t lie.” Dazai averted his gaze.

           “It’s my turn. Truth or Dare?” Chuuya felt his heart sink.

           “Dare.” Dazai looked down at Chuuya again and got closer. Chuuya’s hair was half braided.

           “I dare you to kiss me.” Chuuya blinked and he looked into Dazai’s eyes. He saw it then; that sad happiness. He would do it; he wanted to. He wanted so bad to do it.

           “Ok.” Chuuya lifted his head and Dazai lowered his. Their lips found each other, almost clumsily and it was only a brief touch but both their hearts felt like they would jump from their chests and ran off together, lost into the colorful infinity that only the two of them had built.

           They alone. They were alone together.

           They kissed delicately, and the next thing they knew, they were back into the cage on the beach. Back to reality and their separate loneliness.

***

           The sun was setting lazily behind Dazai. He opened his eyes and he felt his head hurt. The smell of slat and the sound of waves. His wrists hurt. He took a deep breath and vomited.

           “Oh, finally! I thought you were dead!” Yoko Ogawa’s voice was like a harsh ringing in Dazai’s ears.

           “I would love to, trust me…” The brown haired man looked around him; he was still in the cage, but he could now move his body somewhat. Chuuya was in front of him, though he looked paler than before. His arms were tied up, but the metal gloves around his hands were no more. Probably from all the gravity pressure he and Yoko exerted. Chuuya’s head was resting against the metal bars and Dazai sucked in a breath.

           One of his eyes was blue and wide open, but dark somehow; looking dead. The other was still a white ball, the light reflecting on its shiny surface. There were tears of blood coming down on Chuuya’s cheek from his blue eye; from the other, something as tears but much more dense. Dazai wanted to reach and wiped them away, he wanted to so bad.

           His face, his body, every inch of skin Dazai could see was covered in those red stripes, like camellia petals. He felt like he would vomit again. They were a dark nuance of red, an ill light still coming to the surface from under them.

           Dazai had a lot of time to think in his dream (which he could not remember very clearly) One thing he knew, he and Chuuya came up with a plan to escape. Well, it was based on Dazai’s guesses about Yoko’s ability, but if what he thought was true, then his plan was flawless.

           Kind of. He hoped so.

           “How long have we slept for?” asked Dazai, but expecting to not be answered.

           “About three hours. “ Hm. It felt like a lot more time to Dazai. He wondered if Chuuya had the same dream�� He shook his head. It was impossible.

           “Why didn’t you kill us while we were sleeping? It would have been easy.” He heard the sound of feet on sand and he looked down. Finally, he could see Yoko. The woman looked up at him, a malicious smile stretching on her purple lips. Kind of the worst combination possible with the orange light of the sun setting on her face.

           “Well, where would be the fun in that? You have to watch your friend die first.”

           Dazai scoffed. Did the people around him thought that he could not take it? That he was not strong enough to?

           Maybe they were right, but they would never know. Because Dazai never cried. There was always someone that would see him; he had to always be ready, he could never let his guard down. Even when he was alone, he was not. His fifteen year old self was laughing at him from the mirror, and his head was stuffed with voices that were not his own. Or maybe they were?

           And then there was Oda. Since he died, he followed Dazai like a blood ghost, guiding him, protecting him and making the voices from his head go away at times. Even now, he was standing in the cage, dripping blood from his wound.

           “Do you have a plan?” Dazai ignored Odasaku and responded to Yoko instead.

           “I already watched my friend die. Actually, no, I watched my friends die. There were more. I am the only one left as you can see. Chuuya is not my friend.”

           Yoko remained silent for some time and then pointed her index at Dazai.

           “You are just a kid; you know nothing about this kind of things, but you still think you do. You still think you are above the world. You think that…”

           She stopped mid-sentence and flicked her wrist. Dazai’s shackles tighten around his hands and he felt as if they were almost chopped off. Blood started to drip on the metal floor, mixing with the vomit from earlier. Drops of the strange mix trickled down onto the sand. Dazai held his screams in.

           “You think that you know how this world is! You know NOTHING!” Yoko twisted Dazai’s left wrist. He squeaked in pain and like that, with his eyes shut close, he did not see Chuuya slowly getting up. Neither did Yoko Ogawa.

           It was as if the woman had gone mad. Yes, she was crazy, there was not a single thing about her that could be described as sane, but what happened to her?

           Dazai didn’t know that, like him, Yoko Ogawa heard voices, he didn’t know that he was followed by her own ghosts dripping in blood that she spilled.

           “Kill them…”            “Yes, now…like you did to us…”

           “Murderer….! I hate you.”

           “Mama, don’t! Mama, mama, hahaha…”

           “Do it, darling, kill them, kill them, kill, kill, kill…”

           “Kill, kill…”

           “Mama!”

           Yoko ignored them and broke Dazai’s left hand. Tears rolled down her face. The voices of her family hit her like the waves hit the island. A storm was coming; the sky was getting grayer, darker and it was not long before rain started pouring. It hit the metal cage violently. Yoko’s makeup didn’t seem to be waterproof; her mascara was all over her face and she was still twisting Dazai’s arm, without mercy.

           The boy closed his eyes and bit his lips and did not make a sound. It was raining as that day.

           “Do you have a plan?” Odasaku would just not leave him alone.

           “I do, I do… Now quiet.”

           Suddenly the metal cage shuddered and Dazai opened his eyes only to see a red flash in all the grayness surrounding him. It was Chuuya, it had to be!            And yes, here he was indeed! It seemed that Yoko could not control two things at a time. Dazai’s guess was correct. His plan didn’t involve in getting his hand destroyed though, but it didn’t matter anymore. He was just glad that it worked out.

           He heard Chuuya grunt and he watched down to see his friend trying to reach at Yoko, a fight where both sides had gravity as their ally. Who would win?

           Chuuya looked up at Dazai. His eyes were not hollow; they were both blue and full of live and he smiled as he pushed harder and harder until Yoko was half buried in the wet sand. The sea was ragging.

           But, suddenly two women came running. They were behind Chuuya, so he didn’t saw them, but Dazai did. His shackles were now merely some pieces of chopped metal. And he still had one good arm. He quickly escaped from them and jumped off, holding his gun pointed at the women. They looked at him surprised and then at the cage, at Chuuya and at their boss and exchanged a look.

           They charged forward and Dazai shot them. He missed. He missed and the women could have killed him, but there was no need. They ran towards him but did not stop. One of them pulled out a blade and cut Dazai’s stomach. He collapsed and cursed his weakness. But, he did not cry.

           He caught a glimpse of Chuuya being thrown over and that was all. Then he fainted again.

***            “Well, you sure fainted very much in this story,” said Odasaku, looking at a half-wasted Dazai from across the table. He didn’t even try to stop him anymore. Chuuya would come to pick him up afterwards anyway.

           “Yeah~!I was ~hic~ dipressed.” Dazai’s head was spinning, but he wanted to finish the story. There was only a little bit to it…

           “You mean depressed?”

           “Yeah, what~hIc~ever now shut up and listen, Oda! This is a legendary story! I bet those kids of yours will love it!” Odasaku sighed and looked at the watch on his wrist. It was a little bit after midnight. He nodded towards Dazai as his friend started to narrate his love story again, interrupted only by his hiccups and the sound of a broken clock.

***

             Dazai woke up with a stinging pain flowing from his arm, exhausting his whole body. A seagull was picking at his hair and only for that reason did Dazai sprung up and made the bird fly away. His whole body was feeling hot; did he have a fever?

           He tried lifting his right arm, but it was too hard. He looked down at it and the sight of Chuuya’s fingers being intertwined with his made him recall everything that happened. He quickly checked Chuuya’s heartbeat; it was there, and Dazai let out a joyful breath. It was weak, but it was ok, everything was going to be ok…

           Dazai got up and put Chuuya’s arm over his shoulder. His left arm was completely ruined; it didn’t even hurt anymore, there was only a sense of numbness. It was going to be alright, repeated Dazai to himself, struggling to walk with Chuuya hanging on him

           He would go and leave the Port Mafia. Maybe Chuuya would want to come with him. Maybe they would go overseas and start their own business. Maybe something like an orphanage, maybe they would buy a house and they would stay there.

           Chuuya wouldn’t have to use his ability anymore. They would be normal, they would be good people, better than they are now. Yes, and maybe he and Chuuya could go watch the pink cherry flowers bloom, they could make snowmen in the winter, they could everything neither of them got a chance to as a kid.

           They could watch the moon on a windy autumn night, while the pie they had tried to cook for hours is burning in the oven they set wrong. The moonlight would illuminate Chuuya so beautifully, accentuating his blue eyes. And maybe Dazai could lean down and…

           “DIE! Die you filthy bastards, you motherfuckers, you gross me out! Die, die, die!!” Yoko Okawa’s voice startled Dazai as the woman came towards them. Her hair was a total mess, and her purple lipstick has been replaced by red stains of dried blood. Only now did Dazai see the other two women lying lifeless on the sand, face up, eyes open, their throats violently split by human hand.

           Dazai tried to go out of Yoko’s path but he felt an overwhelming force pinning him down. He looked at Chuuya who opened his eyes. They were not full of freedom; there was nothing else than pain and anger there. He didn’t know where his friend gathered all that energy to keep going.

           It was a mystery for him.

           Yoko approached, her legs trembling.

           “Die, die, die!” cried she as tears ran down her face, as her hand was gripping on a pointy rock as she was slipping on the blood the ghosts around her left behind them.

           “Mama, come to us…”

           “Don’t kill them, mama! We love you!”            “Darling, we are waiting. Come to us.”

           She stumbled and she fell face forward on the rock she was holding. Dazai winced; blood splashed on his clothes and he heard the woman murmur:

           “I am coming, my kids.”

           And then the island fell silent. Chuuya coughed and Dazai looked down to see the red sand before him. The redhead did not stop and only now did Dazai notice the wound on his torso. It seemed like a knife cut and even if Chuuya tried to suppress the hemorrhage, it was still bleeding pretty hard. His friend went numb in his arms again and the island disappeared right before Dazai could assure Chuuya it was ok.

***

           They were back in the club. The people around them seemed to not notice anything unusual about the two members of the Port Mafia.

           Dazai’s mind was finally starting to function. He needed a hospital for Chuuya, quickly or else it was possible for him to…

           No, he first had to get out of there. The music (who the FUCK plays such bad music, now let’s be serious!) was making his head hurt and the smell of piss and beer didn’t help either.

           He took a deep breath as soon as he was outside. His muscles were sore and his left arm started to awake. But, Chuuya was his priority. Dazai rummaged through Chuuya’s jacket and he pulled out the keys of the motorcycle (Jenna, that was what Chuuya named her) and smiled tired. He clicked the red button and he heard a ding-dong noise.

           He loved Jenna! It was on her way to Dazai and Chuuya. The brown haired thought; once he had Jenna, he would bring Chuuya to a hospital. What was the closest one? Hm…

           “Dazai…” Chuuya’s voice was hoarse as he spoke. “Dazai, please don’t leave me…” Dazai looked down at his friend surprised and chuckled. He brushed Chuuya’s hair out of his face.

           “But, you are a god and I am human. We can’t be together.” Dazai felt a stinging pain in his heart as soon as his words left his lips. It hurt him more that the pain in his arm, more than anything he ever experienced.

           “Then, from now on… you’re no longer human. So, just stay with me.” Dazai’s heart twisted in his chest and he nodded, even Chuuya could not see him.

           “Ok, Chuuya. I’ll stay with you forever.”

***

           “And this is how I got the name of my ability,” finished Dazai, smashing the empty bottle of whiskey on the counter. Odasaku nodded.

           “Hm, I guess it could have been worse.”

           “You, shut up! You old hag ~HIC~!!” Dazai covered his mouth. “HGG, I feel like throwing up…” Odasaku sighed and pated his friend on the shoulder.

           “Well, I should go.” Dazai sprung up and pointed accusatory at the man in front of him. The empty room smelled like Odasaku’s favorite whiskey.

           “You will leave me here? In this ~bleaghh…” Dazai had thrown up on Odasaku’s shoes and the man looked indignanted at the only one that was still keeping him alive. He smiled and he exited on the door.

           “Don’t worry, I’ll always be with you. And, don’t forget that there is someone else you are waiting for.” Dazai didn’t hear those words as he was already asleep.

***

           In the other part of the town, a phone rang. The man who owned it put his glass of wine down and answered.

           “Who is it?” The man listened closely to what the one who called him had to say. He nodded a few times and then said:

           “I understand. I’ll be there in a moment.”

           Chuuya went into his garage and pulled Jenna out and as he was thinking about what he was going to do, he smiled. That dumbass.

***

           The door of Lupin opened as the clock struck midnight again. It was definitely broken. Chuuya eyed his former partner, that was sleeping on the counter, his hair covering his closed eyes. Chuuya approached and he felt something slippery under his feet.

           Of course he had to walk straight in Dazai’s vomit. Of course there was no other way. The bartender appeared and greeted Chuuya, smiling at him. The redhead nodded.

           “Thank you for calling me. Do I have to pay for anything?”asked Chuuya, already drawing his wallet out of his jacket.

           “No, no, it’s ok.” Chuuya frowned at man and slammed 50 bucks on the table.

           “For dealing with this idiot for such a long time.” The bartender smiled and sighed.

           “I see you know how…peculiar this man can be.” Chuuya burst out in laughter as he drew Dazai’s arm over his shoulder and exited from the bar in the cold night.

           “I know better than anyone.” He walked with Dazai to Jenna and he tried to wake up the man. By slapping him hard on the face. It worked.

           “Ouch, what was…” Dazai’s face lighted when he saw who had come for him. “Chuuya! I’ve been waiting for you!” Chuuya rolled his eyes and raised his palm warningly.

           “Hop up right now or I’ll slap you again.” Dazai looked at his friend and he chuckled. He sat up on Jenna, almost falling once, but Chuuya put him back in place.

           “Chuuya~!”

           “What do you want, motherfucker?? Isn’t it enough that I came to pick you up, drunk, at such an hour!?”

           “Can I sleep at your place?”

           Chuuya hoped on his motorcycle and almost punched Dazai. He started Jenna and screamed over the sound of her motor:

           “You are crazy!”

           “I am!”

           Dazai smiled and nestled himself into Chuuya’s body. It smelled like peaches and wine. He closed his eyes and let himself fall back into sleep.

           “I’ve been waiting for you, Chuuya” murmured he as his eyes close one more time. Chuuya remained silent as they left Lupin far away behind them.

             Waiting for you sounds like a broken clock.

****

End Notes

And, yes, while they stayed in that white room (i leave it to you to decide what that was) dazai did tell chuuya that he was leaving the port mafia. and yes chuuya did punch him and he also told dazai that he cant come with him and refused to explain further. for that, he had to let dazai tickle him because i REFUSE to believe dazai left like that he cant he is better that this

i think? ok hope you liked it bye bye muah

[whateverisbeautiful]

Reveling in Richonne

#98: The Relief (7x16)

This moment. 😭 Y’all this moment was one of the most beautifully raw and emotional Richonne moments to date. It was our last bit of Richonne dialogue for season 7 and it was so special.

I knew the season 7 finale would be emotional just from the first few seconds when Sasha is listening to Donny Hathaway’s “Someday We’ll All Be Free” and I was hit right in my African American feels. 😋

(Side note: Sonequa really did her thing this season and I’m glad her talent really got to shine before she left. 👏🏽👏🏽)

Losing Sasha was already really sad but then they gotta put this scene in with Richonne and Carl cuz again, TWD has no chill. And I’m so glad they had this scene cuz it made it crystal clear how deeply, deeply in love Rick and Michonne are. 😭

Y'all this was such a moving scene so we have to break it all the way down. 👌🏽

So first you see Michonne leaned up against the wall looking pretty beat up. This was so sad to see cuz you know she must have been hurt really bad if she had to stop and just lean against the wall and sit out this fight.

Like she probably was hoping to make her way to the others, after her own fight, and help and warning slice some Saviors cuz she's Michonne that's what she does, but she was too injured to even move that much. 😥

And it's heartbreaking cuz you know she was probably so beyond worried for her boys, even more than herself, and she had to just sit there not knowing what their fate was. And plus she's alone, like what if this was how she was about to go out? Alone and not knowing if her loved ones made it. 😥Thank God that didn't happen. 🙌🏾

Instead, we see Rick enter the frame and it's interesting cuz you can tell he first enters the room with his gun up and ready cuz he doesn't know what crazies might still be lurking.

Like just from that one half shot you can tell that he was ready to be OG Rick Grimes and take out whoever needed to be taken out. 👏🏽

And I just love that Michonne has OG Rick Grimes to come after her and protect her lol. Like this man is nothing to play with and he's putting all those nothing-to-play-with-efforts towards finding her. Here for it. 👌🏽

And then he sees her and immediately switches from savage Rick to Michonne's man Rick.

He rushes to her and again gets all up close and personal, which I love. And then he says Michonne’s name two times and you hear something different in each way that he says her name.

The first time he says it, he doesn't even know if she's alive so it's this very hesitant nervous “Michonne?" to see if he'll get a reaction. Like imagine this moment of being in front of the person you’re in love with and having to say their name, unsure if they will respond back or if you’ll get confirmation that they’re really gone. 😢

And he doesn’t get a reaction from the first time saying her name so he says it a second time with heightened concern in his voice as he fears she might not respond.

Like you can hear the desperation and just brokenness he feels when he says her name a second time. And it’s sad cuz he so clearly fears that she might be gone but he has to say her name again just to hold on to that hope that maybe this time will be different.

And this is when we cue my internal tears. Cuz Michonne does respond and then y’all the way Rick reacts just slays me every single time. 😭😭

The amount of overwhelming relief that pours out of him when he sees that she’s alive is so precious and moving. Like you can literally, I mean literally, see Rick become overcome with joy that the love of his life is still alive.

Seeing his response to her being alive really hit home to me how deeply interconnected these two are. Seeing she’s alive just made him come back to life.

Like it’s true what people say, there really is no Rick without Michonne. Cuz Michonne is Rick’s rock and guiding star and without her we saw just how lost and crushed he’d be, even just in the few seconds of him thinking she might not be alive.

Michonne told Rick in season 3 “You need me” and it’s still so true to this day and this moment really illustrated that. During this whole battle the wind had been knocked out of Rick and seeing Michonne move her head just put the air back in his lungs.

I’ve mentioned a lot in these posts about how Rick gets to be completely human with her and I think this is one of the most human moments I’ve ever seen of Rick.

Like right here he was literally just a person who was overjoyed that his best friend and love and rock was still alive.

It again made me think about how the one thing Rick has just for himself outside of his kids is Michonne. She's someone he loves intensely and someone who makes his personal life better and happier. Like she is not only someone he loves in his life, this is also someone he very much wants in his life, and someone who plays a huge part in making life worth living for him.

And you see Rick be filled with gratitude about the fact that, that special one of a kind person in his life is still alive.

Michonne slowly turns towards him and you can see Rick having to actively resist his inner magnet because he clearly wants to touch her but he’s not sure how hurt she is and he knows he has to be careful of how fragile she may be rn. Always so mindful. 😊 And he says with so much relief “You’re alive.”

And then the way Michonne works up a subtle smile and reaches for him when she hears his voice and sees it’s him. Y’all it slays me yet again.

It is seriously too precious. Like even in all this pain she still can’t help but show how happy she is that he’s now right in front of her. They in love y’all.

You can tell that knowing Rick is alive is such a relief to her as well cuz for all she knew Rick could have been killed and the odds of Rick not making it out of that battle were high so this is a blessing right now that he’s alive and that he’s found her alive.

And then, only once it’s clear that Michonne’s alive, does Carl enter the room. 😭 This always stood out to me cuz it makes me think maybe Carl wasn’t quite ready to go in the room and see Michonne in this state or maybe Rick wanted him to wait.

And it’s super sweet when Carl does enter and stoop right beside them cuz you can see how happy he is that Michonne survived. Like these boys really love this woman. 😭

I saw someone point out how Rick looks like he kisses Michonne’s hand and y’all I am here for that. When I saw the scene again it really does look like it, especially cuz you see Michonne reach for him. So to whoever pointed that out, you a real one lol. 👌🏽👏🏽

These gestures are so sweet and Rick values Michonne so much. 😭 It’s also just further proof that magnets are a powerful thing. 😋

And then Michonne sort of has this nodding movement as she starts trying to get out the words “We’re the ones who live.” And I love this nodding cuz I feel like seeing Rick and Carl by her side really confirms to her that they truly are the ones who live.

Like she’s reassured cuz she knows if they could make it through all that chaos and be back with each other at the end of it, then they seriously must be the ones who live.

It’s sweet that despite how much it hurts to talk and how beat up she is, Michonne is still going to try and uplift Rick in this moment and give him this encouraging reminder that they can make it.

You can tell it’s so hard for Rick to see Michonne struggling to speak and so he helps her out by softly repeating, “I know." and, y’all, these "Richonne tones" never fail to melt my heart cuz he’s speaking with so much love and gentleness. 

And then with conviction he tells her “We are. We will”. 😊🏽

I love that, as we’ve seen this motto said between them a couple times throughout the season, we end with them both verbalizing it and believing it.

This moment really demonstrates how Michonne can speak life into her man even when she can hardly speak. 👸🏾👏

And it’s powerful cuz it’s not like they just won this fight and everything is perfect now but they still believe they can live because they are still standing despite the fight and the curveballs that were thrown at them. And like my Homegirl said in the cell; they’re going to keep standing. 💯😌

So after Rick tells her this he looks at her and you can tell those magnets are kicking cuz you can see him thinking of how exactly he can move closer to her without hurting her. And so he leans into her and gives her a hug because those magnets can never and shall never be denied. 🙌🏾😋

I adore this hug. Like it is just so precious and says so much. 😊

(Side note: I also call this the “greedy hug” cuz Rick was going to make Carl wait his turn to hug Michonne lol. Like Michonne is Carl’s best bud and also Carl kinda sorta almost died, so he probably wants to give her a hug too. But Rick is understandably in the moment rn. 😂)

You can really see how much Rick needs this hug. Like yes he wants to hug her to let her know how happy he is that she’s alive but Homeboy also wants to be back in his girl’s arms right now cuz, added to the many things Michonne is Rick’s source of, she’s also Rick’s source of comfort.

This visual of this hug is so sweet cuz it’s like an illustration of how much Rick can lean on and find comfort and security in Michonne.

It seems like this is Rick's first time getting to just let all the craziness that’s just happened sink in and get to just let his guard down and be comforted. It’s too precious.

And I love that, injured and all, Michonne is still so ready to comfort and embrace him. And I appreciate that Rick also wants to hug her to comfort her as well. Like this hug paints such a clear picture of how much R&M want, love, and need each other and how much they really are one. 😊

Basically this hug is everything and this scene was everything cuz it very visibly illustrated how much Rick and Michonne mean everything to each other. 👌🏽😊

[serendibidibidis]

I’m lactose intolerant but this is really fucking cheesy…

Okay so in America it’s thanksgiving today & I’m gonna use that as an excuse to shower some amazing people with the love they deserve okay. (Also please don’t think like “oh I’m last on the list I’m the least fave..” Or something because I’m deadass doing this at random)

☆♡☆♡

@ssamdominic : so you may or may not know this but you follow me on one of my other blogs scandalous and as I was deciding if I should leave or not you sent in a requst / really nice ass message for me and you are the reason I didn’t leave that blog. You are the reason I still create content even when I doubt myself… I am forever grateful for you and I will always support you because you have always supported me. You seriously are such a sweetheart I can’t even put into words my love for you.

@8bityeol : god you are fucking great.. I love you so much OML you’re just great. Your content is high fucking quality. I always read your stories when I need to distract myself from life I always can rely on your work to make my life better. you’re also the biggest Angel ever. I mean seriously how are you so sweet? I just

@wonpillily : thank you for always letting me send you pics to increase your heart rate. I love that we share such beautiful content with each other and can fangirl together. I forever cherish you!! Not to mention the fact your humor is fucking priceless..

@brownpigment : even when we go months without talking we always can just come back and pick up like we’ve been talking non-stop. I mean you’re one of those people who it’s so easy to connect with and it’s such an honor to talk to you. And ugh your works are something I always look forward too. You can’t help but love them.

@forvictorymyeverything : don’t even get me started. You seriously are my fave. I just i have no words. I love everything you do. I love your existence. I always feel so honored whenever you tag me (even when it’s on fucking biases) I just i feel like we’re in two different classes (you obviously being high class) and then you’re just like ‘let me *an angel tag this peasent (that is I) because I’m deadass just great and I love making peasants feel valuable’

@ludeere : literally as I’m typing this you’re sending me the nicest messages and I’m sobbing you’re an amazing writer please never give up on that. You seriously are so talented and pure and I just I’m really sorry I never came across your blog sooner because I’ve been missing out. You seriously just wow.. Your works blow me away & yeah I’m already an emotional wreck but holy shit they make me so emotional I just can’t function.. Like?! I literally read the Simon as your bf one and was full out ugly crying and that was a cute scenario like don’t get me started on the angst.

@day6ibnida : HOLY SHIT you’re SO TALENTED LIKE YOU LITERALLY DRAW SO BEAUTIFULLY AND I CAN’T HANDLE IT. We haven’t talked in a while because we’ve both been so busy.. I hope you’re taking good care of yourself.. Honestly I hope you decide to sell your art someday so I can buy it. Because I need that in my life. I want your drawings tattooed on me. Like they’re so great. I can’t wait to talk to you and catch up on everything..

@tinytaehyun : you believed in me when so many others didn’t. You gave me a chance when others were against it. You push me to go out of my comfort zone as a writer and I can never thank you enough for that. You don’t know how much our conversations mean to me. My whole day is made when I see you’ve responded. Time zones fucking suck but I’d stay up all night to hear about how things are going. I’m so proud of you for everything you’ve gone through and over come. #proudmom

@mybrainsamess : I haven’t really known you too long. But I am so glad I met you. Honestly you have brightened my week since I met you. I am extremely excited to get to know you even more.. you’re far too good for this work and I hope that you always have a smile on your face. (Also I just realized your url I thought it was like 'my brain Sam ess’ and I’m just over here like is that forgien or something?)

@thecoolmrsokamura15 my lovely Peach 🍑 I am so very sorry at how bad I am at responding to you. You deserve better. I will try harder to respond to you and not be a shitty friend… but I am so thankful for you. You we’re the first kpop friend I made that made me feel welcomed… I felt accepted and that I could be honest and not be be judged. You made me feel like I belong.. i can’t thank you enough.

@soul-less23 : where do I even start with you?! You are absolutely stunning, your work puts me to tears it’s so beautiful. you’re such a kind soul. I don’t know how but you’ve helped me get over my anxiety with driving. You are seriously such an Angel I don’t even have words. Minus the fact we have a conversation about dead cats rn

Y'all literally mean the world to me and I love you so much. Like all of you are just the best. I’m so lucky to have met you.

Also I want to thank a few people who I’ve noticed in my notifs a lot lately.

@pendulumandthepoet , @foodie-for-life , @thatartsyfreak , @akr2001 , @brownskinnedbeautie I want to thank you all for the constant love and support you give my blog. I hope you know that just because I don’t know you doesn’t mean I don’t notice you and care for you. I look forward to what my future brings thanks to you, I feel like I could update paint drying and you would still support my page. Please stay healthy and happy.