#y’all I just think it’s really neat how this relationship is being developed in this series and how much mutual respect and admiration
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With having just watched episode 4 of “My Adventures with Superman” and thus completing my “3 episodes to WOW me” test, I can safely say that I like it and I highly recommend it. (the 1st 2 eps is a 2-parter and I count multipart episodes as 1 since it’d be unfair to count half or a third of a story on it’s own, thus waiting till ep4)
Clark Kent is the lovable puppy himbo that we all know he is. Just a humble kid from Kansas who wants to help people, track down a story for the Daily Planet and saves cats from trees no matter how late he is. This being early Superman, it’s great to see him develop and learn about his powers overtime instead of being godmode almost immediately like in a lot of modern adaptations. For those that think that Clark is acting a little too nervous really need to go back to the earlier works and watch how actors like Christopher Reeves played Clark. Just a nervous, shy but good person who doesn’t draw attention to himself.
Lois Lane was a change that a lot of people didn’t see...especially that she is strikingly similar to Luz Noceda (tho’ Lois is Korean in this) but that doesn’t matter after a while since your quickly won over by how determined she is to break a big story and prove that she’s a real reporter instead of just an intern. Her and Clark having pretty much a “crush at first sight” type relationship is pretty cute in this as while it seems to be moving fast, it’s also taking it’s time... however the ending of episode 4 might toss a wrench in that for a bit. Lois is still that overeager ace reporter we all know except that she’s still got a lot to learn until she gets to the ace reporter we all know.
Jimmy Olson being a conspiracy theorist (a fun one, not the losers we have now) is an interesting change and I’m waiting to see how far they take this and what it’ll do to help the story along. Granted that for a bit of the Clark and Lois romance, Jimmy knows that they like each other but at the same time is fulfilling the typical anime 3rd wheel and interrupting things, tho’ not maliciously. Him and Lois have a neat dynamic together and him being best friends and roommates with Clark makes sense and hopefully we get an episode showing how they met and became friends.
The villains have been neat takes on the classic ones, like so far we have Livewire, Deathstroke, Parasite, Ivo, Silver Banshee. I’m actually very glad we haven’t gotten Lex Luthor yet because I’m so sick of the movies using him as the main villain for Superman. I know that Lex is the Joker to Superman’s Batman but it’s great that the other villains are getting a chance to shine without Lex around. Also just like with my mentioning that this is early Superman, that also means the villains aren’t the villains that we know, I’ve seen so many people complain that they “ruined” Deathstroke by anime-ifying him but they forget that this isn’t the Deathstroke we know, this is before the orange/black mask and getting his ass kicked by teenagers on the regular. Let these things build up, y’all. (Also, I’ve seen ppl wanting to see this show’s version of Bruce Wayne and like, c’mon. let Superman have something without the Bat for at least another season)
So yeah, I highly recommend this show atm
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Alrighty I’ve finally finished season 5
I hate how obvious it is they’re trying to tone the show down completely to even lower audience demographic. The first 3 seasons were for kids but there was actual peril and darker concepts and stuff that were much more interesting damn you Nickelodeon and your desperate attempt to keep the most squeaky clean image ever not only does it not work it’s costing stories and plot
I REFUSE to believe Stella would be a bad fashion designer with how much she loves fashion (I know it was a joke in s1 too but I still refuse). Plus, avant-garde is a thing and she would serve
That boat that was sent from Andros was def made exclusively for the winx there is NO WAY that style exists anywhere else on that planet for land related peoples with all of its hard lines and industrial style architecture with its limited color palettes
The nautical themed outfits are cute but Bloom’s looks SO overdone to me and Stella,, my sweet babygorl,, wtf did you do to your own fit?? Aisha’s poodle puff braid ftw also
Harmonix was totally useless BUT I still like the flower petal aesthetic vibe (even tho only Flora is a nature floral lady) and some of the color combos. Bloom in pink is still a no tho, which is something I mainly hate because of how obvious it is they started integrating it into her more to make her more marketable for toy lines and shit
Where did the gems that were already on the starfish thing for sirenix come from?
The amount of times the girls all gasp or ooo or ahh and go like “wow!” “so cool!” “amazing!”,, I will kill I feel like I’m watching a 1990s or early 2000s anime dub I hate it I hate it I hate it
Icy would NOT simp like this (shoutout to her leaving Valtor when he got ugly and telling him that’s why she’s leaving him)
The relationship drama was just as stupid and hamfisted as I thought it was from an outside skim of the season based off of secondhand knowledge ie posts and gifs. Also, Krystal did nothing wrong, she’s just autistic and Helia would NOT introduce Flora as anything other than the love of his life.
Timmy and Tecna also have one of the healthiest relationships why tf is everyone trying to give them advice like this they’ve all been dating for YEARS why are all of y’all so insecure like this? The writers really said fuck everyone’s character development even more than they already had
I continue to not give a shit about skoom also this was just exhausting I can’t do it
Also that is NOT Luna and Radius. That “he wouldn’t say that!” meme is ME SOOOO MUCH during this season at so many people but I actually started YELLING about Luna being some sort of soft gorl while Radius is this prideful ignoramus
Sirenix giving Aisha that blonde hair while knowing about the insane white washing to come in the future is something I Think About
The sirenix song does bop also, although I’m so sorry to say I don’t think I’m as big of a fan of it as a lot of people are but maybe that’ll change as I hear it more please forgive me
Also, Musa’s little coffee grinder move during her sirenix transformation? So cute, wish we actually got to see it more than like 2 times. Damn you shortened sirenix transformarion sequence
Im convinced Tecna doesn’t actually know karate, she just thinks it looks cool so she mimics it. Same with Flora and her ballet/lyrical looking poses she does during her sirenix transformation sequence. She doesn’t actually know those styles of dance, she just thinks they looks neat and tries to copy it.
Dark sirenix, you’re slaying thank you for your service
Bloom, you can’t insult Diaspro and remind her you’re a princess in that fucking dress while she’s serving cunt like that
The combat is soooo slow compared to previous seasons I hate it
The rigging throughout this season was a MESS
They should go after the handful of companies that are actually responsible for the majority of pollution and destroy them and their ceos a la Flora season 1 core
Where did they put all of that trash they got out of the ocean? They went to the pacific trash island and cleaned it up. Where did it go? I’m so curious
All of the kings are so STUPID too the whole meetup thing was so dumb like just fucking,, help each other you know it makes more sense
AND PUT SOME MF RESPECT ON THE WINX’S NAMES, ALL OF THEM. They are GUARDIAN FARIES who have saved the magical world HOW MANY TIMES NOW??? Bites the writers bites the writers bites the writers
Their little dance workout outfits? Hatred. I miss the old ones so much. All of these outfits from this season,, it’s so clear cishet people were the main ones designing the clothes I hate it so much it’s not the same kind of tacky and camp that the first 3 seasons had. The only good things I can say about the dance outfits is that Flora’s purple leg warmers were cute, Aisha’s color palette was nice, and Bloom’s was very Bloom core
Icy: you guys are helping me??
Darcy and Stormy: I mean, yeah, we aren’t talking to you rn, but you’re still out sister
Me: OUGH🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭
I forgot Roy existed🥲
Daphne being brought back like this still seems so bleh to me knowing how they don’t really do shit with it and about how it was done only because they retconned all the og stuff from canon and to continue to milk the franchise until it’s teats are dry and chapped BUT I’m glad she does a little spinny at the end of the season with Bloom so at least I got that
that’s all I got for now
Shout out to @charmixpower for suffering through this all with me.
We watched the first half of the series in like 2 or 3 sittings that took place months apart, and then did the last half in one 8 hour sitting
I couldn’t have gotten through it without yelling at each other and making shitty jokes.
The psychic damage you inflicted on me throughout this was awful but I would do it all again in a heartbeat (but not really because good lird this was EXCRUCIATING sorry bestie💕💕💕)
Anyway onto season 6 now I GUESS
#Winx club#winx#winx club rewatch#rewatch#winx rewatch#snarky ramblings#which is a new tag I’ll make I GUESS#Winx club season 5#winx season 5#Winx s5#Winx club s5
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Y’all I wanna cry I know in a perfect world where anakin and padme were there to happily raise their kids Luke would get into politics and leia would learn jedi stuff but Kenobi has me considering that she’d be obi-wan’s padawan rather than anakin and so help me god it will not leave my head
#I wanna cry bc of the insomnia but like yeah can you blame me#y’all I just think it’s really neat how this relationship is being developed in this series and how much mutual respect and admiration#they have for each other and how healing this has been for obi wan after anakin and how important it is to leia too that someone doesn’t#necessarily try to restrain her but rather guide her and help her parse through complex things bc he knows she’s smart enough and capable of#understanding these things and I just??? I AM NOT FUCKING OK ABOUT IT#and I will be a purponent of this for the rest of my fucking days. Leia over dumbass Luke. Just how it is.#obi wan kenobi#leia organa#kenobi series#spoilers#I guess?
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Ted Lasso 2x8 thoughts
I am so lucky that the creators of Ted Lasso decided to make this entire show specifically for me. #blessed
If last week felt like a bit of breathing room (albeit tense, poignant, character-progressing breathing room) with distinct narrative lines, this week’s episode was a chaotic yet tightly-written swirl of pain and hope and sadness! No neat subject headers for this one, y’all. Just my brain and heart in the inadequate form of a bulleted list. It is the medium available to me at this time.
I am going to remember the moment when Ted calls Sharon and tells her his father killed himself for the rest of my life.
(I could say a bunch of stuff about his face and what he says and how he tries to hide his tears from Beard right after and how insanely much I adore this character and ahhhhhhhh but I’m just going to leave that scene there in our collective memories.)
Jamie. JAMIE. Higgins has given some great advice about love on this show, but his musings about his up-and-down relationship with his own father were not helpful in the context of Jamie’s dad, who is an abusive piece of shit. I really adore that all of the main AFC Richmond staff members are realistically a bit hit-or-miss with their advice and life philosophies (some are mostly miss this season, of course).
And I am completely in awe of the moment when Jamie punches his father. The way he just stands there after Beard kicks his dad out of the locker room. The way you can hear a pin drop. And Roy—Roy who is learning in so many areas of his life about his influence on people, learning that the things he needs aren’t necessarily the same as the things other people need—is the one to cross the room and hug him. Hold him, really, with the tenderness Ted used when he hugged Rebecca outside the gala in 1x4. God.
I’ve thought a lot about how s1 was about giving people a soft place to land. There’s always an angel there when you need one. There’s always an opportunity to be kind. If you look for someone, you find them. If you look for the good in someone, you find the good. And as everyone works through their individual journeys in s2, that can’t always be the case anymore. But there are still so many moments of angels on this show, and it’s not about chance and serendipity and fate [not that it was about that in s1] but about the effort it takes to become someone who can be there for someone else. Or who can be there for yourself. I’m so proud of Jamie for physically fighting back against his father. I’m so proud of Roy for being the one who recognized what Jamie needed.
I have every feeling in the world about how Ted is almost totally frozen both times (s1 and s2) he witnesses Jamie’s father abusing him. In s1, he was still there for Jamie after, and I have every reason to believe he’ll be there for Jamie after this incident as well, but that frozen stance HURTS. He’s in so deep with his pain about his own father that it’s like he physically cannot snap out of it to act in the moment. It seems entirely outside of his control, and it breaks my heart, because Ted wants so badly to be a good father, a good coach, a good friend, a good partner, a good patient. He’s there for people in all kinds of ways, even in his current less-than-capable state. He takes care of Sharon post-concussion and even gets her a new bike! During the disastrous match at Wembley his coaching is ineffectual and everything is chaos but he’s the last one standing on the pitch! But this really awful thing keeps happening to Jamie and Ted is just…frozen in the face of it. Like one of those nightmares where you’re running in place.
The frozen-in-place nightmare also kind of applies to the way the total separation between Ted and Rebecca feels, too. I have never for a moment doubted the writers’ intentions in setting these characters up as soulmates on parallel journeys, and I’m actually really digging (on a story level) how disconnected they are right now. It is IMPRESSIVE that their absence in each other’s lives feels like such a glaring loss, one we cannot forget even as there are so many other things happening onscreen. It is 100% not just shipper goggles making me process information about Ted while thinking about Rebecca and information about Rebecca while thinking about Ted. I know there are a lot of really angry and frustrated people in the fandom right now (both T/R shippers and T/R antis and non-shipping fans who don’t get why s2 is different from s1) and while I understand being frustrated by choices characters make, and frustrated by the feelings the show makes us feel that we just want to feel more of or less of, I continue to agree with pretty much every narrative choice happening right now.
Agreeing with the narrative like this?! This is such a unique experience for me as a viewer—to feel like I’m on a ride that is at once absolutely wild and incredibly sensible and well-crafted, and to feel simultaneously completely invested and anticipatory and speculative but also totally willing to trust where it goes. I long for Ted and Beard to really talk. I long for Ted and Rebecca to stop missing each other. I long for Roy to have a serious conversation with Ted about what’s happening with him. I long for Keeley to find a vocation, something that drives her beyond her projects. I long for so many things! But I wouldn’t long for them if this show was less good. If the show was less good, I wouldn’t have a wish list a mile long because I wouldn’t be so attuned to the details and potential lurking in every scene. THIS IS SUCH A GOOD SHOW, I CANNOT HANDLE IT, I LOVE IT SO MUCH.
(To that end, a great deal of the Ted Lasso tag and so many Twitter reactions reactions to the show feel super stressful right now and I am kind of just trying not to look?! I love this fandom so much because of the amazing conversations that happen and because of brilliant fic and because there are some awesome people I never would have encountered were it not for this show. That little bubble is wonderful and I’d stay in this fandom no matter what in order to keep experiencing those things. But fans’ catastrophic reactions to every little thing that happens, every little choice a character makes that isn’t the “perfect” choice? The takeaway that the writers—on this show of all shows—wake up in the morning ready for another day of torturing shippers rather than another day of writing a beautiful story they genuinely want to write? I do not enjoy those parts at all. I would like to opt out of those parts. I’m having such a magical experience watching this show and talking about this show and listening about this show and writing about this show with a variety of people who feel all kinds of ways. I truly wish I could somehow transfer the energy of this experience onto all the people who are hating it right now. I don’t mind at all that people are having vastly different reactions to this show and are sharing their honest feelings, including the really angry ones (I can appreciate something and disagree with it!), and I get that sometimes the language of fannish reactions is intentionally, ironically hyperbolic. But there feels like this very serious trend of people legitimately thinking writers on this show are targeting shippers and have lost respect for their characters, and I just feel like an alien from another planet when I see that stuff. I guess I just feel like people make art because they want their art to be visible to other people and to themselves, but that doesn’t typically involve specifically catering to or torturing a subset of that audience?)
I am more fascinated by Sharon Fieldstone than ever before. I have been running through every single action with her and Ted so many times. The confirmation that she’s living in club-provided housing (that could not look more different from Ted’s club-provided flat). Ted clearly noticing the many bottles. Sharon’s face while she tries to casually recycle them. (Sharon could legitimately have a more problematic relationship with alcohol than Ted does, and I find that extremely interesting and am very curious to find out what happens there.) Sharon leaving him voice notes while she’s concussed, probably because she’d been thinking about him shortly before the accident. The way Ted calls her and does all the funny voices and it’s not frustrating like all the times he uses his silliness and allusions to deflect during their prior conversations because this time, those behaviors are just a part of him showing care for another person. The way they stretch each other, and Ted is still wrong about the things he’s been wrong about, but they both grow all the same.
While it is pretty much impossible for me to imagine that this show would include an actual romantic relationship between Ted and Sharon (it would be beyond unethical even if they could write it well, and Sharon in particular is so professional and committed to her work, and it would erase so much of the powerful message about the importance of seeking therapy from a professional who is not your friend or partner, and I would totally hate it), watching this episode was the first moment I had this queasy little feeling that it’s possible that Ted could end up developing really complicated feelings about Sharon since, at this point, he’s been honest with her about things he’s hardly spoken about before and you can really form an attachment to people you feel safe with in a new way. (I mean, I’m sure Michelle knows what happened with Ted’s father, but I’m not even certain if Beard does.) He’s so broken right now, and Sharon is such a great person and so different from anyone else in his life (even though Rebecca is also different, and Beard is also different, and Roy is also different, and so on), that I could see things getting really fuzzy for him. I continue to have faith in the way the storylines on this show are handled. I’m just. Putting this here.
(In saying that, though, I also wanna make it really clear that I don’t just automatically assume anytime a new female character is introduced that they’re going to end up becoming a romantic complication. Like, Phoebe is allowed to have a teacher who is an attractive woman and AFC Richmond is allowed to have a sports psychologist who is an attractive woman and Keeley is allowed to talk to Jamie Tartt without it threatening what she has with Roy and all these people can exist as human beings without the introduction of romantic drama.)
Isaac gives every player one haircut per season, OH MY GOD. The JOY during the haircut scene. YES.
KEELEY AND REBECCA. Their text thread. The affirming video call right before Rebecca goes into the restaurant. The way Keeley sits all snuggled up against Rebecca in her office.
I was pretty thoroughly spoiled for the Sam and Rebecca plot through 2x8, and I was bracing for something far more problematic and tortured than what happens in this episode. The words I would use to describe their scenes: awkward, cute, cringy, and understandable. There are a million reasons why this relationship isn’t sustainable, but I felt completely understanding of both their choices here. This show has a lot of thesis statements, but I keep going back to the idea from 2x1 that there are people who enter your life to help you get to the next point, and I think it’s entirely possible that Sam and Rebecca will mutually be that for each other.
I find comparisons between Rupert and Rebecca super upsetting. There are absolutely meaningful things to say about the irony of ending up in a situation with an uncomfortable resemblance to certain taboo elements of an ex’s situation. But that ex is abusive and manipulative and cruel and Rebecca has exhibited NONE of those behaviors, and it makes me really sad to think that people feel that the writers on this show have betrayed Rebecca in giving her this storyline.
As always, I reserve the right to keep blathering about this show. I’ve had a headache for a couple of days, but my head is also so full of 2x8 thoughts that I couldn’t keep them in even if the circumstances for writing this were not ideal. I kind of hate that I’ve included frustrated fandom thoughts within the analysis of what I felt was an absolutely gorgeous, complicated, heartbreaking, near-perfect episode of television, but if ya can’t be a little dramatic on your own tumblr while you’re feeling raw and under the weather, where can ya?
#ted lasso#ted lasso s2 spoilers#meta by me#ted lasso 2x8#a lesbian watches ted lasso#cw: suicide mention#cw: alcohol abuse mention
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It’s about time I wrote some real meta for this season, but I’m tired and have a mushy brain so this is the best y’all are gonna get.
*CW for discussion of angry outbursts from Michael manifesting in a physical blowout from his powers, also for child abuse and having to hide one’s true self.*
This gorgeous parallel gifset and this lovely meta have put Thoughts into my head about Michael and Sanders. Namely about them being family and how we’re seeing the development of their relationship from where it was in season 2.
The meta is about how Sanders revealing what he knows about Nora and the aliens, and that he knew about the pod squad (and Michael specifically) from when they were at the group home, and tried to adopt Michael, opened a door to their relationship blossoming to the point of Michael being vulnerable around Sanders. The gifset shows parallel moments from 3x02 and 3x06 when Michael becomes emotionally overwhelmed and lets out a burst of TK before he calms himself down.
I just want to make a point of linking these two things, because the parallel of Michael releasing pressure with Isobel and with Sanders are visually almost identical, and that very much plays into Michael being vulnerable/comfortable around Sanders since last season.
Because the thing is, we *know* Michael has had to hide his powers as long as he can remember. We *know* that Max and Isobel were the only ones he could do it around/release anger in that way (kicking the jeep in 1x04 as well) because he could not risk exposure otherwise. But we *also know* that Michael has suffered abuse specifically for letting his powers out in a burst of anger (the referenced “exorcism” in 1x06).
So idk what I want to say exactly except that it’s imo a really special and remarkable thing to see Michael comfortable enough to truly let off steam in front of Sanders in a way we have only ever seen with Max and Isobel. It just. Yeah. I think it’s really neat.
#roswell season 3#roswell new mexico#rnm#michael guerin#walt sanders#tw child abuse#my roswell meta#a riley special
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Platonic Toko and Byakuya Things!
Oops so now I have Toko and Byakuya on the brain. I know people have said almost anything and everything about this, but I wanted to add some stuff and ramble a bit! Toko and Byakuya both mean sooo much to me as characters and the idea of them some day actually getting along has my entire heart and soul.
Spoilers for Trigger Happy Havoc and Ultra Despair Girls!
So obviously we need some time here, right. Listen I love them both but they need time apart and such; this doesn't happen overnight
I need some of that sweet, sweet Toko development first. Y'know once she stops idolizing them and sees them as an actual human being. Also how badly they treated her and vice versa. Basically, we need to throw out the entire dynamic and start fresh
Mutual apologies should probably happen and to be quite honest, I've wanted to write that out for months, but I can't decide exactly when or how it would happen, so I haven't. But I love the idea to bits.
Anyways AFTER all of that gets squared away, I genuinely think they'd make amazing friends in a weird way
They're both sarcastic, sharp, and cocky depending on the circumstance.
Like yes, Toko is e x t r e m e l y insecure, but never once does she put down her skills, and on some level, she has moments where she displays pride and confidence, too.
And to be honest, isn't Byakuya insecure, too? They just don't express it in the same ways as Toko. Chapter 4 tings, ya know?
The sheer levels of sass between the two of them is iconic, and if they ever were aiming that sass at the same target, they wouldn't survive.
Gay best friends
I'm one of those people that headcanons Toko as a lesbian with a whole lotta comphet, and tbh I imagine something similar for Byakuya. Less comphet and more not understanding what attraction is even supposed to feel like until catching feelings for a guy for the first time. Absolutely primed and ready to force themselves into relationships with women for the sake of their family's tradition before realizing it's definitely not supposed to feel that uncomfortable.
Weirdly enough they have a lot in common. I don't know if they'd ever get super close, but in the event that they did, they'd be able to relate to each other on a lot of levels.
Also the discussions of literature mmMMM good shit.
Not that they ever have a ton of free time but in the event that they do, they could probably pass a lot of time just getting into healthy debates over interpretations of things
From the outside, it looks like they're about ready to murder each other, but they can go back to being civil on a dime
Also Byakuya giving some of Toko's stuff a chance just? Hits different?
Bro especially once Byakuya ends up in a relationship because I feel like then you can get a new appreciation for that type of thing. The cheesy shit feels a bit less stupid
Listen they hate that they like it but they do like it
speaking of dating y’ALL THE DOUBLE DATES??
Komaru would get super excited about it which would make Makoto super excited about it and both Toko and Byakuya don’t know how to say no.
In laws in laws in laws
Hello Naegami Tokomaru nation how are you doing
Damn honestly it’d just be cool if they got along. It’d be really, really neat if what remains of their class could all get along as a group. Mutual healing type beat
Gosh now I’m imagining Toko, Byakuya, Makoto, Kyoko, and Komaru watching a movie together while Toko and Byakuya just rip the entire story to shreds
(Kyoko tries to stay quiet, but she does eventually join in. Albeit with a bit more composure and grace than the other two)
Komaru and Makoto are just glad to see them getting along
This is very very specific, and who knows, maybe I’ll actually write this as a fic at one point, but I have an oddly specific headcanon regarding the events of UDG and Genocide Jack and such
With the events of the first killing game being broadcast, Genocide Jack’s identity obviously becomes public, and that would cause a lot of extreme consequences for the system as a whole.
After she actually heals (ACTUALLY as an individual, not just Toko trying to control her switches) and genuinely decides to turn over a new leaf, I think Byakuya is the one who gets her, and by extension Toko, out of hot water.
They’re way too prideful to ever outright thank Toko and Jill for saving them, but in their own special, standoffish way, that’s how they return the favor- giving them that sort of Togami stamp of approval and speaking to their credibility overall
It all has a very professional air to it; however, it's the start of a rocky but good friendship
Overall that’s just how their friendship works in my head: they start spending more time together through other obligations or their significant others, and they come to the realization that they actually enjoy each other’s company when they aren’t verbally abusing and sexually harassing each other :'D
I think once they both do some serious healing, they could be really good for each other as friends. They'd get along better than both initially would think.
Thanks for reading my little rambles! I hope you enjoyed them! Hopefully I’ll write more about their dynamic someday soon. Like I said, I love them both dearly, so it’s fun to imagine!
#toko fukawa#fukawa toko#byakuya togami#togami byakuya#genocide jack#genocider syo#danganronpa#dr headcanons#danganronpa headcanons#I think I made it pretty clear but just in case for the love of everything p l e a s e don't interpret this in a romantic or shippy way#that ship makes me big sad#but eventual friendship v good <3
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For the Yu-Gi-Oh character ask you have pinned, how about Sora Shiun'in?
Oh hell yeah, free excuse to talk about my son
(Note: There will be Arc-V spoilers in this post)
Why I like them/why I don’t
I liked Sora from the very beginning because I thought it was really cute how much he seemed to immediately like Yuya, like he was just following around his crush all the time and wanted him to teach him about Pendulum summons really badly. He’s just... adorable? I love him? Look at this face, how could anyone not love him?
Past the initial “oh my god he’s so cute, I wanna hug him” phase, once I learned about his past? I just felt sympathetic for him. This baby right here was essentially raised from a young age to be a child soldier. He went to war with XYZ at the age of 11. He’s never had a friend prior to meeting Yuya and the others, and man... I know that he did some fucked up things, but I can’t hold it against him when he never had a chance to be a normal kid. Academia fucked this child up really badly, and seeing just how far he was willing to go to prove himself in a fight against his enemy (Shun) just made me want to get him some much needed therapy.
What I like about their appearance
Everything. There isn’t a single thing I don’t like about his appearance. I think Sora’s got a really nice color palette, his outfit is very practical and actually makes sense (which can be rare in Yugioh sometimes), and altogether he’s just cute. Also a big fan of blue hair, so that earns him extra points in my book.
Do I prefer their dub names or original names?
Between Sora Perse and Sora Shiunin, I like Shiunin better, but I do appreciate the effort the dub put in by giving him a last name that has a similar meaning to his actual name.
OTP
Y’all already know what I’m about to pick
Candyshipping is literally the only Sora ship I have, but it’s one of my absolute favorites to come out of Arc-V. It’s really endearing how much Sora just loves Yuya right away, and they make it so blatant in a lot of their interactions throughout the show. It was nice watching them develop from Sora being the one with the most interest in Yuya to Yuya and Sora actually having a pretty solid relationship where both of them clearly care for each other. 10/10.
NOTP
Preyshipping, without a doubt. Sora’s only 13, and Shun is 17 years old. Almost a legal adult in most countries. A 4 year age gap wouldn’t be a big deal if both parties were of legal age, but when it’s like that? It’s gross and uncomfortable to pair someone that young with someone who’s almost 18. Preyshippers do not interact.
OT3
Don’t have anything to put here tbh. The only person I ship him with is Yuya.
Favorite card they use
This one
I just think it’s neat tbh. A little creature with some stuff and things. Personally some type of vibe.
Favorite moment they were in
I really love this whole scene from episode 83, where Sora has to confront Moon Shadow and face the man whose brother he sealed into a card. He's genuinely remorseful for what he's done, and feels like he deserves whatever punishment Moon Shadow deems fit. He's willing to face it, knowing an apology could never be enough, and only wants to continue on long enough to fulfill a promise to Yuya in keeping Yuzu safe. A few screenshots don't do the full scene justice, but it really is one of the best character arcs he has in the show.
Least favorite moment they were in
Hm... I guess I would have to pick the duel between Yuya and Sora after Sora's come back to Standard during the Arc League Championship. I think it was great for his character development and all, it's just one of those things that I wouldn't exactly want to watch for fun, you know? There are a lot more scenes with him that I'd rather watch to feel good.
Would I fuck, marry, or kill them
He's baby and I care for him, so none of these really work for me. If he were older, I'd pick marry.
#ygo arc v#sora perse#sora shiunin#candyshipping#anti preyshipping#ygo ask meme#thej3579#arc v spoilers#spoilers
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Okay. Somebody Asked. @shoujobell and @cryptidaicat, y’all encouraged this. I’m gonna tag this #long post if you wanna filter.
So here. I got the urge to write and so I ranked the Fruits Basket couples from my favorite to least favorite. These aren’t my complete thoughts because I could honestly do multiple full meta posts on each pairing, but I tried to justify and explain all my choices. Standard disclaimer, this is subjective and we can agree to disagree.
Part 1: Just the reasonably popular ones
1. Kyoru: Someone’s gonna call me unoriginal for this but it’s fine. Kyoru is the main romance of Fruits Basket! They bring out the best in each other and build each other up as characters. Kyoru is basically my gold standard take on Sunshine Girl x Grouchy Dude, and I’m not even usually into that trope otherwise. Their romance is one of the few that feels so genuinely necessary to the story. They love each other and like each other. Kyo understands Tohru in a way no one else in the narrative does, and vice versa. They’re in love like soulmates and also like awkward teenagers. Kyoru invented romance. If it’s boring to like healthy romances with realistic development, I’ll be boring.
2. Tohrin: If Tohru didn’t end up with Kyo I would only want her to be with Rin. I guess they have some of the same appeal as Kyoru for me - Rin reads Tohru in a way a lot of people don’t. I also like how honest and raw they are with each other. They yell! They fight! Rin is down to just straight up knock Tohru over to keep her from rushing off. Also, they’re both absolute fashion icons. Goth x Prep rights. I firmly believe Tohru Honda is bisexual.
3. Yukeru: This is my favorite Yuki pairing. I followed @yunsoh way back when the reboot first started and her blog has got me absolutely hooked on Yukeru. I think Yuki’s arc would have just made a ridiculous amount of sense if he was gay. It screams comphet. Kakeru is an excellent complement to Yuki, and their bond feels incredibly natural. Honestly I feel like it’s the most organic romantic development outside of Kyoru. I think realistically they wouldn’t have gotten together until post-canon and frankly Yuki shines in his friendships much more than romances, so I’m not absolutely dying for them to be together, but if Yuki’s going to date anyone Kakeru is my pick.
4. Arisaki: Man... I just like them. They strike me as less of an epic love and more of a comfortable partnership. I also read them both as lesbians anyway lol. Honestly I think they both had feelings for Tohru at one point and bonded over it. The way I picture them happening is honestly just Arisa at 25 frantically googling “is it gay to hold hands with my girl roommate who I spend all my time with and also we never date men“ because Saki bought them rings that look like wedding bands but they could just be super close friendship rings and oh god she’s in too deep. They’re dating for four years before they notice.
5. AyaMine: But Jessie! You literally never post about this pairing! Yeah, you’re right. I never think about them actively. But when ranking the canon ships I realized that I like the two of them together because they’re chill and understated. They’re huge loud personalities on their own but as a couple, they just feel like two people who are happy together and like spending time with one another. No drama, no mess, very understated. No plot contrivances driving their relationship. Good for them.
6. YukiKyo: Okay, so I can be convinced to put on my YukiKyo goggles more often than not. It feels iffy because there’s debate about how closely related all the Sohmas are and these two are called “cousins” a lot in school, but since half of the Sohmas are dating each other anyway, I err on the side of them being more of a clan than a proper blood family. Anyway, YukiKyo is my designated angst fuel. I think it would realistically be pretty one-sided from Yuki’s side, since we see him wanting Kyo’s approval from a very young age, but I like exploring the what-ifs of their lives if they’d been friends instead of rivals. In canon, I like to think that after high school they’re not best friends in the traditional sense, but either one could show up with a dead body and the other would help them bury it, no questions asked.
7. Yuchi: Really? Yuki’s wife is my third favorite pairing for him? Look, I adore Machi, and I still like Yuchi. But as I’ve been watching the reboot and reading others’ metas, I think I agree that their relationship could have been very powerful as a platonic one, sort of running parallel to Yuki and Tohru. I like them together but I think there wasn’t quite time for a complete character arc for Machi and her growth sort of begins and ends with Yuki. I don’t object to them being a couple in canon and I think they’re genuinely very sweet, but once again, I think Yuki stands out in his friendships more than anything. I would have liked to see Machi strike out on her own a little more.
8. Haru x Yuki: I don’t have any particular feelings towards them but I love their dynamic already and I think as a couple they’d both be really easygoing and comfortable with each other. I think a childhood crush turned close friendship is honestly the narrative that works best for them so I have no need for the two to date canonically, but every time they interact in the anime it gets a laugh out of me. They’re cool. They’d make a very pretty pair.
9. Mayutori: I’m Mayutori-neutral. I think they suffer from Fruits Basket’s pair the spare syndrome, but out of the side pairings that don’t have too much impact, they’re one I enjoy. Mayu’s fun as a character, and painfully relatable, and I like that Hatori’s eventual romance isn’t with someone who reminds him of Kana or something like that. I also want good things for Hatori. Mayutori has serious heterosexual energy though. I’m not saying this as a pro or con, they’re just very straight.
10. Hatsuzu: Okay, Haru and Rin aren’t this far down because I hate them. I’m perfectly fine with them being together in canon. But I think their romance almost... functions better as individual motivation for their character arcs than it does as an actual relationship, if that makes sense? Rin’s backstory episode is heartbreaking and her motivation to protect Haru is compelling and sympathetic, but their actual scenes together just don’t move me that much. Their romance is the least interesting part of either character for me.
11. Hiro x Kisa: Yeah I never got into it that much. It’s cute, it’s a sweet depiction of childhood crushes, but I’m not a fan of the idea of them ending up together. Kisa’s a cutie and Hiro is entertaining but the two of them together don’t actually do much for me. The dynamic between them is almost like if someone did Kyoru with none of the nuance. Ultimately though, they’re kids. I don’t expect them to have a deep and complex romance.
12. Yukiru: I think it would be a disservice to their characters if they were a couple. People far more eloquent than me have already written plenty of meta on why Yuki and Tohru aren’t what the other needs romantically, so I won’t get into it, but basically I just think their canon friendship is so beautiful and meaningful that I wouldn’t want to change it. Yuki and Tohru support my thesis that not all soulmates are romantic.
13. Tohru x Momiji: Welcome to the subjective dislike corner! This pairing is reasonably popular among people theorizing who Tohru would be with if not Kyo, but for some reason it just sits poorly with me. I can’t rank it any lower because there’s nothing evil or morally wrong about it! I just really don’t like it. I’ve quit a few fics because this pairing came up and I just can’t enjoy it.
14. Kakeru x Komaki: Idk, I just think Kakeru latching onto the one girl who was nice to him and put up with his bullshit and then being with her forever isn’t compelling. Komaki’s also probably his beard. She’s likable as an individual though.
15. Akigure: There’s plenty to say about the age gap, Shigure being in love with Akito since she was a fetus because of The Dream, the implications of a 15-18 year old knowing he’d one day want to be with a then-10-year-old... yeah, you get it. But even if I was able to put all that aside because Soulmate Destiny Logic, I still don’t think I’d like Akigure. I think they’re interesting as bitter, codependent exes, but I don’t like the idea of Akito ending up with anyone who she abused or who abused her. I think she has so much growing to do as a character and staying in a relationship within the Sohma family to do it can’t be healthy for her. I can’t see them living happily ever after, nor do I really want to.
16. Kurisa: I think what frustrates me the most here is that I want to like Kureno and everything about this romance is written to dull his most interesting traits. First of all, the age gap. Yeah, it’s gross, I don’t like it. But even past that, the love at first sight, instant fixation with each other, and lack of actual chemistry just kills me. Arisa’s stated reason to like Kureno is that he reminds her of Tohru, basically piggybacking off the chemistry she and Tohru already have, and his total lack of agency means the plot just sort of carries him along. It frustrates me that Takaya could have done something pretty cool by making them simply friends who have a chance encounter and then build a friendship from there that parallels Kureno’s abusive dynamic with Akito. It would be neat if a stranger’s kindness was the push Kureno needed to get himself out of the Sohmas’ grasp, without all the nonsensical drama about them being in love. It would also be less of a disservice to Arisa, who basically just spends the whole series pining for Kureno after they meet and I hate it. I could write a whole post about this. Maybe I will sometime.
17. Kyoko x Katsuya: I don’t think their story is romantic. I think it’s tragic for Kyoko, and if it were framed that way within the narrative, I wouldn’t object so much to its existence. But... Takaya just really likes age gaps with a younger woman and an older man, so the narrative romanticizes this man marrying his student. Katsuya can be depicted as well-meaning as you want, but he’s still got a ridiculous amount of power over Kyoko. She was also still pretty young when she had Tohru, which doesn’t make things any better because it’s clear that the relationship turned physical when Kyoko was a teen, thus dashing the idea of Katsuya legally marrying her to save her but not actually doing anything creepy. I wish Fruits Basket framed this as a story of Kyoko escaping one dangerous situation by entering a relationship with a huge power imbalance, because that happens to girls all the time and it’s tragic and compelling. The events of the story could stay the exact same and if the framing changed I would be fine with it. But this is not that. This is just a really romanticized teacher/student age gap. I’m not into it.
Part 2: Rarepairs, weird shit, and others (oh my!)
1. Yuki x Kakeru x Kimi: OT3. I’m enamored with the idea of this hot mess polycule.
2. Momiji x Kimi: Chaos meets chaos. This couple would say uwu without any irony and also steal your car keys. They’re both perceptive and smart hidden under a layer of cute and I’d wanna watch them play 4D chess with each other.
3. Kazuma x Kunimitsu: Idk how old Kunimitsu is so if he’s like 20, strike this one from the record. But I saw one post once that was like Kyo slowly realizing Kazuma and Kunimitsu were gay and had been dating for years and it was funny as hell.
4. AyaTori: It’s cute. Opposites attract, black and white hair, and Aya only listens to Hatori anyway. It’s just fun to think about.
5. Megumi x Hiro: They don’t interact in canon I just think Goth x Punk-Ass Bitch is a great concept.
6. Motoko x Nao: They’re both loud as hell and Nao having a gf that towers over him is funny. Maybe Yuki would finally get some peace.
7. Machi x Kimi: I don’t see them actually being compatible in canon but I think they could have a really homoerotic college friendship.
8. Hajime x Mutsuki: This is just YukiKyo, the non angst version.
9. Akito x Hanajima: I’m so wary of shipping Akito with anyone but this is kind of fun. The two are friends in canon and Hana isn’t remotely afraid of Akito. Plus Akito never abused Hana. I can sort of see it.
10. Hiroshi x Yusuke: Makes no sense, wouldn’t be relevant, but if those two just never spent any time apart and continued being a pair for life it would be a really good bit.
11. Akitohru: I don’t think it’s healthy to date anyone who’s previously stabbed you.
12. Kazuma x Hanajima: Stop. Go to jail. Hana’s one-sided crush is funny though.
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huey, dewey and louie? separate blogs or the same idc ilu
positivity meme. | no longer accepting / @familymade
THIS IS GONNA GET LONG!!
ALRIGHT, FAM. LET’S START THIS THING OFF WITH MR. HUBERT DUCK.
@briilliance writes such a lovely Huey. They are so good at nailing down his dialogue and the way he loves and cares for his brothers while still being a Little Shit himself. I can always hear Huey’s voice in their writing and you can really tell how much Alex loves Huey and I love that for Alex! Alex is also one of the people I have known the longest on this hellsite and I treasure our friendship with all my heart!!!
@tunnagan has made me feel things about Huey and I cry about this little red duckling on the daily. We do a lot on discord that hasn’t reached tumblr but basically the development Bex has given to Huey is SO GOOD, like ... I adore this baby boy baby.
@dollhousemuses has a wonderful Huey as well, and I would die for the Fluffy Boi!!! Doll has put so much into Huey and I get super excited any time they talk about him bc you can tell how much Doll loves him and it is adorable.
AAAAAANNNNND ONTO DEWEY!!!!
@familymade I love love love LOVE LOVE Aelin’s Dewey so much!!! When they first started writing him in our discord server I was just immediately blown away at how they seemed to just nail down how Dewey is. They dewey it fantastically. We love and cherish Aelin’s Dewey in this house. That is son shaped!
@calvinsmuses Another amazing Dewey who is just full of love and just thinks dads are neat. The chaos is real and I get so excited every time Calvin puts Dewey on the dash, that is the Good Kush.
LOUIE TIME
@voidfcllen y’all... I love Zak with all my gay little heart. She understands Louie like nothing I’ve ever seen and we’ve done so much in the way of developing his relationship with Della. We’ve worked out so much with the two of them and I always look forward to when I get to write with Zak. They’re also just an amazing friend and I wouldn’t trade her for the w o r l d.
@decanard Lexi’s Louie is literally so adorable and they have so many different au’s, it’s WILD and I love seeing every single one of them on my dash. I’m always just waiting with some popcorn whenever Lexi posts and they’re so much fun to talk to!! They’re so FULL of ideas and it excites me whenever I get a message saying ‘so I have an idea’ even if it also gives me Fear. Anyway, I love Lexi.
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST I HAVE TO SPECIAL MENTION @warraigoe because HARI’S TRIPLETS MAKE ME SO HAPPY LIKE!!! i can’t just pick ONE of them to compliment sO WE’RE GONNA GO W ALL OF THEM. Like, Hari’s Huey is such a sweetie, and I literally have a cute ask I need to answer. But, anyway onto Dewey; Hari’s Dewey is one of the very first Dewey’s I interacted with, so he is very very special to me anD LOUIE!!!! A BABY BOY BABY!!! My Dewey looks at Hari’s Louie and just cling to the lil bro!!! I love how Hari manages to bring a uniqueness to each triplet that I can’t really describe?? But I love any time I get to interact w them. I JUST.. RLY LOVE HARI OKAY
#familymade#☽ | face each new sun ★ (ANSWERED MEMES.)#╾ OUT. ☆ ╼#briilliance#tunnagan#dollhousemuses#calvinsmuses#voidfcllen#decanard#warraigoe#IF I FORGOT SOMEONE IM SORRY#ILY ALL
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S4 Ep 39: Pharaoh Can Fly (Selectively)
Guys, they’re back
Best storyboarder is back, and the visual difference between last episode and this episode is like when your art teacher picks up your charcoal and just fixes everything wrong with your gesture drawings. It’s like...I mean look at this:
I just really love and appreciate how illustrative this storyboarder is. And I say just storyboarder because this had about the same budget as the last episode--there wasn’t that much actual animation as per usual. But, all of the scenes were drawn so well, like panels out of a good manga. They just...they always nail it when they’re at the helm and I don’t know why they’re on Yugioh, but bless this storyboarder.
Plot wise, everyone got pulled into the dragon by gooey tentacles that came out of it’s stomach, don’t think about it.
Meanwhile, all of the minibosses could communicate with them and beg for help, yes, even the same miniboss who may have dressed up like Pegasus and catfished Seto Kaiba.
(keep reading under the cut)
The whole process of getting absorbed into the Orichalcos demon was a whole lot of symbolism and it was...kinda gross. Also kinda sketch. Also, for Kaiba it is a neat little nod to S1 when he had a vision that his brother was absorbed into a dragon mass.
I don’t think that the makers of the show remember S1, but either they just really like goopy dragons, or it’s a coincidence or I dunno, on purpose? Probably a coincidence.
And like I made this joke and realized...what if they actually meant to make that parallel though? This is the America crossover season, and they have referenced America’s love of trickster rabbits before with Pegasus but do they know about Br’er rabbit in Japan? Do they know? It’s a pretty Americana Deep-cut, and I have no idea how common this folktale is outside of the states.
I see anime busting out absorbing goopy masses all the time so I’m gonna assume that there might be a Japanese folklore I don’t know about which uses a similar structure (although I’m also assuming it has an extremely different history and association ((which I won’t be going into because I don’t feel like putting a trigger warning on this recap)).)
And looking at Wikipedia, there’s people that think the original reference to moist, absorbing creatures could have even come from as far as India. Which is...fascinating to how it also developed in Africa, and then the Cherokee also made the same story independently and then it fused together here in the States to make it what was eventually made into a Disney movie that will never be released again--this is just a really old ass story, all in all, possibly like over a thousand years old.
And a FASCINATING google deep dive I won’t go into for obvious reasons but knock yourself out.
Also, lets get distracted for a sec and see how well this storyboarder drew a fitted jacket at that angle. Dear Lord, did they get reference for that or did their brain just already know that those folds would be there? You can even tell that Pharaoh has just a little bit of padding at his shoulders. Ugh. Guys this storyboarder is so freakin good at these little fitted jackets.
So, once Yugi and his friends are absorbed into the mass, where they should have died...and maybe some of them did, but I don’t know if I should add that to the Death Count because like...they could have held their breath in the amount of time they were stuck in there...maybe...Anyway, they are saved by being tossed into the figurative briar patch--by the souls all hanging out in the Leviathan’s stomach--which again makes me wonder...did they pull a folklore on us? Again, I have no idea.
Like a lot of the people in this dragon have been thorns in their side this entire season, they’ve all tried to kill them at one point--all the minibosses, Mai, Pegasus--but now they have decided to team up with Pharaoh (along with the rest of the human race) and offer whatever they can to free them from the grip of the gross dragon mass.
And like, the ending of the folk tale is that the thorny ass briar patch is also where the rabbit lives usually. It hurts everyone else, but the rabbit--the rabbit can deal with it. And likewise, Pharaoh is freakin dead. He’s at home here. He’s surrounded by spirit power, his friends and their friendship power, this is like his zone, and now he’s crazy powerful for it and will be for the rest of the episode.
And like Yami is a very trickster God (especially Season Zero Yami) so like...it does make sense that he would mirror a folk tale based on trickster Gods, even if it is by complete accident.
So Pharaoh imagines everyone’s tears as individual drops in a glass or something--it’s not a literal glass or anything--it’s just there because the only thing actually happening on screen was his hand hanging out of this dragon’s weird puss skin.
And he’s now a fully charged Sonic the Hedgehog and no longer needs Kaiba or Joey at all. Just gonna grab his God card demons and take charge of everything else from here on out.
By first exploding his buddies right the hell out of this lizard and across hundreds of feet of open ocean.
Joey decides to remind Kaiba that he lost the Battle City tournament.
Seto’s roast was actually in the show, PS. He is not super excited to be reminded that Yugi owns every card that he spent 2 seasons failing to get.
And then Pharaoh did something really, really...
...just really really wild.
OH OK.
YEAH JUST TAKE OFF.
GO AHEAD THERE’S NO REASON THIS WOULD BOTHER ME.
I mean he IS super powered right now but like...
Like...WTF?
4 SEASONS. 4 SEASONS I thought this guy was glued to Yugi like Peter Pan’s Shadow and apparently--he can bounce.
Can Pharaoh do this every time Yugi asks Tea out on a date and tries to instead make the ghost in his head do all the work now? Can Pharaoh just be like “NOPE” and then phase out of the house, leaving Yugi to actually do the hard stuff?
It really adds a level of complexity to their relationship if Yugi can get a room.
(If not a room for romance, but at the very least a room to poop in.)
OR has he been able to allow Yugi to wicked poop in peace this whole time, but the show just never felt like telling us because they felt like it wasn’t important (although it is crazy important)?
Either way I am just...floored at this character development.
Yami just let Yugi out of his sight for like...I want to say 8 full minutes. Just incredible amount of trust on Yami’s part. Incredible. Knowing Yugi’s track record, he should have died in those 8 minutes but...he was being babysat by both Kaiba and Joey.
So Yami summons the Gods and they shoot lasers--you kinda expect this sort of thing.
And this is...probably...the real reason why Dartz didn’t bother trying to attack Pharaoh 5,000 years ago.
I can still think it’s because of Bakura but like...this is probably the real reason. It felt pretty chump to just shoot a laser at the bastard. Pharaoh just had to be reminded that this is a thing he can just do. If he felt like it.
Which he never feels like doing, because he’s too busy watching Yugi’s every move, and getting distracted by High School shenanigans.
After this happens, the giant snake falls to the ocean, splitting into just sooooooo many ghosts.
Over 7.8 billion ghosts, if we’re to assume that this is most of the population on Earth.
(thinking the weird-o in the hat is probably a Duel Monsters card? The duel monsters were throwing themselves into the Leviathan at one point so this is probably like a dark magician boy or something...I just don’t get very attached to the monster cards so it was like...whatever. The cards die like constantly so who cares?)
It is a pretty set dressing. Like Christmas lights but...dead people.
We also find out that the lost family of our minibosses Alister and Raphael, have indeed spent the last many years inside the Leviathan stomach, which is pretty tragic. We get a bitter sweet conclusion to Alister and Raphael’s story--although it’s not a full on ending for either character. Their life still hella sucks, they are in therapy for basically forever.
Where is Gurimo?
I don’t know what sort of job or life these two are qualified to have now, but youknow...Marik’s boat probably has jobs available.
Hold up. Can we talk about the windows?
I know absolutely none of you care about this, but I do, not to be picky or condescending to an overworked art team, but because I just want to know what they were trying to aim for.
There’s an iron stained glass style windowpane thing going on and that’s what’s really getting me. Like...I know these guys were technologically advanced, but why did you use this WW2 background? What happened to Ancient Greece that you were doing before?
Like doing a super past with future tech is so cool to me--I love that sort of concept art. That’s going into like Black Panther stuff where you’re referencing the earliest stuff in Africa and then blending it with stuff beyond our science. But Atlantis is a real big shrug and a “listen we ran out of time and had to press print,” and it’s such a shame. It feels less cohesive than even when this show does Egypt.
And yo this show and how it draws ancient Egypt--I feel like I’ve already talked about that. I have a feeling I’m going to talk a lot more about it next season. I’ll get to it when we get to it. I’m hoping that they have more time and budget to actually DO Egypt for once. (I say knowing they won’t)
Like it’s one of those things where this isn’t a history show, like at all, and it’s very much a fantasy. I’m not going to be like those sewing people on youtube that get annoyed because their TV show doesn’t have handsewn stitching in their Victorian bodices they rented from the costume department from an LA discount warehouse. Because, yo, it’s TV, and I can stretch my own imagination because it’s acting. (although I confess, I watch every single one of those videos).
But...the potential, y’all...the potential.
Anyway, Dartz isn’t dead. He was just taking his toot sweet time getting down the steps of his Gazebo.
This is where things get very anime. I get this problem a lot with anime, I really do--and maybe it’s just me. But like...sometimes it feels like anime changes the rules during the boss fight.
That happens a lot, right? Where suddenly the final boss reveals something that like...should have been addressed way earlier? And he’s alive but you don’t get why?
Anyway, Pharaoh reacts by getting maybe way too attached to his newfound independence.
Which like...I can understand Tea forgetting that Yugi is one people that is two people all the time, but the writers as well?
And what’s kind of great about this scene is that Dartz does see Yugi as two people here. He doesn’t look at Yugi, he looks at both. When Pharaoh is like “Leave me, Yugi!” Dartz heard all of that.
Just kind of a neat thing that we finally have a dude that can just...see Pharaoh for what he is, but it probably won’t matter because there’s like only one more episode left of this season.
Anyway, Pharaoh and Dartz have a chat about where evil comes from...and like...it’s some Yugioh lore, all right.
So before the show decides to give us the Genesis on Yugioh and reveal where the evil of the Orichalcos comes from, or if all evil was created by Orichalcos itself (which is IMPLYING stuff about Orichalcos) the snake shuts him the hell up.
As it should. Leave that Pandora’s box freakin closed. That’s going into extended universe of Star Wars books territory (RIP.)
As an aside--pretty sure that Yugi is standing outside that tornado. Maybe it was just the editing of the episode but like...
Yo I’m pretty sure Yugi is just standing there. For the first time, it’s not his nuts getting roasted. Wow. Tables have turned so much since he was dead.
Anyway, here’s the link for new people so you can read these in order
https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono
There’s only one left! We can do it! We can finish this season in 2020! And actually get back to recapping Full Metal Alchemist! ~~Woooo~~
Oh man that movie better still be on Netflix or I’ll have to buy it lolol.
#Yugioh#ygo#Yu-Gi-Oh#Yami Yugi#Yugi Muto#Seto Kaiba#Joey Wheeler#Dartz#Alister#Raphael#Valon#Mai Valentine#My favorite storyboarder#who deserves to be listed as a character in the show#ep 39#S4#recap#photo recap#episode recap
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Max Mayfield?
Ooh first impression of Maxi was that I wanted to know more about her! She had a pretty strong introduction and set up as a character in the second season and I was really invested in her character from the start, especially because I relate to her so much!
My impression now is that I wish they would’ve done more with her in terms of like, giving her an actually important role! Because I feel like most of her characterization is just bland and overdone tropes, as if once the writers gave her brother an important arc in season three, they realized they had no idea what they were doing with her as anything other than an accessory to him or to lucas or to el, or in relation to the actual storyline of the season. Basically she ended up just being overall kind of disappointing to me! (Fingers crossed st4 fixed that though!)
My favorite Max scene is actually her glaring at Billy when she’s getting her hair done for the snowball dance! I don’t know I just feel like that particular moment sets up everything that is implied to happen after that between seasons two and three, and sort of explains part of why their relationship is so different the next time we see them despite how we didn’t see any of that development on screen.
I have so many story ideas for Max, but the first that comes to mind is a post Starcourt fix it fic where she tries to take responsibility for Billy while he’s recovering, trying to take care of him like she realizes now he had been doing for her!
Unpopular opinion, I guess I don’t think she’s as naive to the abuse that goes on in her home as a lot of people believe. Like it’s a very common trope that Max doesn’t realize Neil is abusive to Billy or how bad it was but I personally think she did know, she was just naive to the true consequences the abuse had on her brother, such as him taking after his dad in his temperament issues, etc.
Favorite relationship is her and Billy in a sibling way. Their sibling dynamic is just really neat to explore and something I relate to a lot with my own big brother!
Favorite headcanon is that Maxi is autistic! I’m sure y’all know that by now if you’ve read through my stuff but I include that hc in literally everything I write with her in it, even if she’s in the background for like a single scene, I always make it known in some small way that she has autism.
ask me about a character!
#answered#ask game!#max mayfield#thanks for the ask! maxi is probably my favorite character in the whole show and I love to talk about her!!
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MERRY CHRISTMAS, LGC MEMBERS!
merry christmas, lgc members! oops! this time you didn’t just send something to they mods, they also wanted to send something to YOU!! every single mod, below the cut, has something wonderful for you all to hear! (no, this is not the christmas present side event lol) our mods deserve all the love in the world, but the members all deserve a little extra love too! happy holidays and everyone have a good new years!
admin l, writer of @lgcxjun, @lgcmiso, and @lgcnami says: 1) what is your favorite part about being a mod? making the members happy. when we put out a new event or implement something new in the rp and members are super excited about it, that's what i like the most. 2) what is the most memorable moment from being a mod in lgc thus far? hmm.. i think it's when we officially opened the rp for reservations and they came flooding. we weren't expecting this. we thought it would take weeks before we get enough reservations to open and were pleasantly surprised when in 48h we had the 10 minimum. we never expected to have over 50 members, either. so this whole experience has been amazing for us 3) what is the best part about lgc members/writers (characters or muns!) seeing the characters grow right before our eyes, that's the part i love the most. seeing the progression of each and everyone of you all always make us happy. the admods are your biggest supports, i swear to god. i also love how our members aren't scared of giving ideas and participate in the growth and events of the rp! we always love incorporating our mun's ideas 4) anything else you would like to mention? thank you for being here with us <3
admin *, writer of @lgcdanbi, @lgcnathan, and @lgctaesung says: 1) what is your favorite part about being a mod? oh gosh… i can’t pick just one! honestly, it’s just being able to plan and create stuff for our members with such a fun and dedicated team like the one we have here! we have so much in store for everyone, and we just hope y’all are as excited as we are for the big things to come! 2) what is the most memorable moment from being a mod in lgc thus far?: for me specifically, it had to be my *first* trimester change as the head of graphics. i literally SLAVED lmfao over our Q4 2020 graphics, and it was so nice to see how much everyone enjoyed the roleplay’s makeover. plus, now that we’re getting closer and closer to Q1 2021, i’m both excited yet SUPER nervous about the aesthetics i want to put out for lgc in the new year! 3) what is the best part about lgc members/writers (characters or muns!): character-wise, i can tell everyone is genuinely invested in their muses’ development and careers here. even though idol krps aren’t anything new, it’s such a breath of fresh air to be a part of a group where people want to see success with their muses from the very start to finish. mun-wise, it’s gotta be activity check sunday’s! seeing people’s live reactions to the queue is DEFINITELY the highlight of my week. 4) anything else you would like to mention?: we’re a small team here (but i swear it feels so much bigger!), and we dedicate a lot of our time in running lgc behind the scenes than in writing for our own characters. it can be a bit of a bummer and can definitely take a lot of muse and motivation out of you, but we’re always so appreciative of how considerate and thoughtful our members are of us. we’re not perfect—no one is!—but despite our flaws, it’s so inspiring to see a place (a home?) like lgc last for over a year and still be going on strong. and we can only thank you guys for all of that! so! thank you!
admin g, writer of @lgchanbyul, @lgcjaesun, and @lgcyumi says: 1) what is your favorite part about being a mod? i have a strange love for lists and stats, and so i actually really enjoy the administration part of being an admin. honestly, i would be the type of person to start a roleplay just to do the logistics lol. i enjoy helping to keep things neat and orderly, though admin a. has been doing a really great job of making my processes even better. my strong suits are not events or graphics, so i leave those tasks to the rest of the team. i think because of that, we make a really great team, and i just enjoy getting to see the fruits of our labor week after week and seeing people excited over them as well! 2) what is the most memorable moment from being a mod in lgc thus far? there are many memorable moments, of course, and this might sound silly … but probably when we received our first application that was not from one of our og staff members. frankly, when we started this group, we were fairly certain no one would want to join, especially with so many other great roleplays around, so to have watched it grow over these last 16 months has been pretty incredible! 3) what is the best part about lgc members/writers (characters or muns!) i wish i could give a special shoutout to each person, but that will quite literally take me a year so i apologize that i’m taking the easy road out. i think the best part about our members is just their willingness to help, whether it be helping others understand the points process, what is needed for an event, or just any of the other logistics that might lead to confusion. it puts a smile on my face to see that teamwork and selflessness exhibited by so many of you. when we mention that we’re stressed, there is never a shortage of eager hands being raised to offer help, and we always appreciate that. i think it’s not easy being a big group, and it can be easy to feel left out, so i just continue to applaud those who really help to make people feel at home! 4) anything else you would like to mention? 2020 has certainly been a wild roller coaster ride, but it’s certainly been made better by getting to write and interact with all of our members. i hope that those i haven’t had a chance to write with yet that i will get to do so soon! thank you all for your continued support and i hope everyone has a happy holidays and a happy new year! may 2021 be a better year for all of us! thank you also to leaf for organizing this! you’re truly a trooper for putting together this special treat for our members ( and months ago for doing it for the admin staff as well )! always appreciate your thoughtfulness in spending the time to think of others. ❤️
admin a, writer of @lgcaeri, @lgceunhye, and @lgcsanghyun says: 1) what is your favorite part about being a mod? my favorite part is seeing people’s reactions to everything we do in lgc and using some of those elements to help build their character or celebrate their accomplishments. a good example of this are the events that have been revealed in the past and reading the reactions and feedbacks encourages us to think more about what kind of events we can make or improve on! 2) what is the most memorable moment from being a mod in lgc thus far? i’ve only been here for a short period so i can’t quite name a lot, but the one that i can think of on top of my head is during the end of the trimester. it’s usually the busiest time for us for several reasons, but it feels the most rewarding to me personally because behind the scenes, we really try to make sure that everything goes smoothly. add that everyone is so patient during those times and we really appreciate it! i personally want to take this opportunity to thank everyone for all of the positive messages and support you have sent to us! it really means a lot to us! ❤️ 3) what is the best part about lgc members/writers (characters or muns!) i mentioned this previously in the one year anniversary post, but i would say it’s the community that has been created and developed over time. it’s gone through a lot and the fact that we’re still active now still shocks me sometimes! aside from that, i would also say reading through the solos and posts that we see on the dash (and yes, we see what is going on 👀). while there is so much that i don’t know about everyone’s muses, sometimes it’s nice to just sit back and see what everyone has been up to lately.
admin c, writer of @lgcxking and @lgcjin says: 1) what is your favorite part about being a mod? for me it’s seeing members get excited about events that we put out, and creating new canons based off them. i don’t think i would be able to keep being an admin if i didn’t feel this sense of wonder and excitement coming from everyone! 2) what is the most memorable moment from being a mod in lgc thus far? i’ve probably mentioned it way too often by now, but when we created lgc we expected it to die off after a couple weeks/months. we never expected to last so long and it wasn’t easy in the beginning, but after a while, i’d say around october/november, we started welcoming a lot of new muns that have become such an integral part of the rp. the fact that we’d have enough members to form a lot more than one group for each gender is amazing in itself. and the 2020 family concert really had me realize just how far we’ve come! to see all of those muns and muses experiencing it for the first time even though they’ve been in the rp for so long and achieved so much. 3) what is the best part about lgc members/writers (characters or muns!) i don’t want to name anyone in particular because i’d want to talk about everyone and that’s impossible, but like i mentioned above, it amazes me whenever i see everything that the muses have achieved in a year. i think i realize now just how many events we put out LMAO. some muses are fairly new but are already on future dreams or lgc girls japan, others have begun acting, producing, hosting, etc. i always love to see the very detailed plan everyone has for their characters and even though it might take a while to happen ic, it’s important to set goals! some that might not even happen in a near lgc future, but it gives such life to muses. i also love seeing friendships form, relationships grow, suddenly being on dash and realizing that a muse FINALLY confessed to another, or sometimes just discovering important information through someone else because we can’t possibly read every single thread on dash (i’d love to, though, trust me). there’s a ton of people i haven’t interacted with yet on my muses, and i would sooo love to do it but with the amount of work that goes behind the scenes… let’s just say though that we love every single muse and i’m probably a bigger fan of them than you are!!!!! 4) anything else you would like to mention? small mention to you, leaf, for doing this! thank you for the love and care you put into these types of projects it’s very cute ;; we really liked getting messages from members last time too. also, to anyone reading this, just know that we’re glad you’ve decided to join us on this legacy journey!!!! why do i feel like i’m ending this too dryly but I LOVE YOU GUYS and thank you for all the support, patience, understanding and time investment <333
admin y, writer of @lgcjaehwa says: 1) what is your favorite part about being a mod? i'd say seeing members dropping random appreciation posts and messages would be my favorite part! there were times where i tend to overthink and become a mess. although it may just look like a simple ask, random messages like these really makes my day. 2) what is the most memorable moment from being a mod in lgc thus far? my first 'project'! its something i planned all by myself and to receive positive feedbacks makes me feel proud of it! i'm usually pessimistic when it comes to myself so this is really a big deal for me. this project is not out yet but will definitely be revealed in the future ;) 3) what is the best part about lgc members/writers (characters or muns!) the best part is of course the community!! i never expect myself to stick to a rp for this long. there is this saying, 'the muns keep the rp running'. without you guys, lgc will not be where we are today! 4) anything else you would like to mention? i just want to say that although i'm not close with everyone, i do hope i can get to know more lovely people here! and i thank you guys for staying with us throughout this journey. i'm sure lgc will still continue to stand strongly for the months or even years to come <3
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Cassian’s Love is Warm (3/4)
Summary: Nesta’s recovery in the Illyria and her developing relationship with Cassian... Or the chapter where Nesta communicates a little better and dives more into her magic.
Links: Nesta’s Love is Quiet Series Masterlist
This took so long and I don’t even really know if it was worth it but here you go. This is dedicated to those 15 followers who always ask when these chapters will be done and like all my posts about updating this fic. Y’all keep me young...and honest.
Thanks for reading! Long asf author’s note at the end.
~
Something in the air smells like spring.
Nesta can imagine Elain here, in this field where wildflowers bloom and cold wind tickles her hair. She can see it all so clearly as if the sun has melted more than the snow—has left more than mud.
Cassian stands behind her, waiting for her to take it all in. She can see the purple tents of the market, the bustling of people. All of them running around with the things to do and accomplish. The presence of life in such a remote piece of the world.
They walk towards that noise, the sweet song beckoning them forward.
It hits her all at once, then. The smell of cinnamon and cardamom, the array of autumnal spices lined in neat rows. Nesta inspects the red and yellow peppers hanging above the counters. Her eyes trailing over pots of hot broth and the bubbling swirls of chocolate and cream, trying to imagine the sweet taste of strawberries coated in crystalized red.
Cassian points to food she’s missed along the way and there’s something intimate about the way he leans towards her, his hair gently grazing her cheek. He points to his favorite dishes, the color vibrant against the worn brown of the stalls. Nesta wonders if he’s noticed she’s only half paying attention, caught more by his enthusiasm than the seven different kinds of fried food.
His face grows red when he’s excited, she notes. Like spring has a made a home in him, and he too comes alive. He talks with his hands, gestures wildly, at ease in this unfamiliar place. Nesta lets him guide her along, all too aware of the shy smiles he keeps trying to hide between glances.
When Cassian suddenly stops at a stall, Nesta has to catch herself from running into him. She always forgets he is larger than her—larger than life really, but Nesta never notices how tall he is compared to her. A mountain in her way, she thinks, if he had not also been the bridge.
Cassian points to an ornament hanging from one of the railings. A chandelier of blown glass that sways gently. “How about one of these?”
Nesta tries to imagine the house with its bare walls and tattered décor and place the chandelier in the midst of its chaos. She hopes that the picture will appear like paint on a canvas with its cerulean hues against grey. A hint of sky between parted curtains. Forget-me-not shades in forget-it-all concepts. But the image that appears in her mind is her sister’s skin smudged in the same blue Nesta looks at, a brush gripped firmly in her hands.
Nesta stares into the clear teardrops.
“Where would we put it?” She asks, trying not to meet his eyes. She notes the stalls across from them and the amount of people drifting from each. Tries to count them one by one in her effort to escape his gaze, questions already forming at the tip of her tongue. How long will they stay here perusing items that have no commonality? How long before the items become unwanted again? Things thrown haphazardly around each room with no purpose but to be pleasant, yet still can’t manage even that.
“Maybe, above the dining table…after we get a new dining table.” He remarks. “Maybe, the living room.” He nods slowly, tapping his finger on his cheek. “I can see it hanging there.”
Nesta can see it there. She hates to admit it, but she does.
Such a bright light in all that darkness.
She can imagine them under it, too, with more than enough pillows cushioning them on the couch, pushed to the floor. A thick rug she can feel through her toes, that she can feel on her back. Their shadows tangled by firelight. Her head resting on his shoulder. His fingers trailing along her arms and—
Nesta shakes her head. Her face growing warm.
“We can look at other things, if you don’t think—”
“No” Nesta says, breathless and her heart beating much too fast. “It’ll work; I think. With the rest of the house I mean.”
She scorns herself for sounding flustered, but Cassian simply smiles in confirmation. Mouth wide and endearing.
“We can make it work.” He promises, as he signals the shop owner.
Nesta watches as they talk, the muted gestures careful as he hands the chandelier to Cassian. Such craftsmanship in glass. Beauty in something so breakable. She could shatter it before they even made it back home—
Home is not a prison like she thought it was. It is not four walls and a roof, or food or no food at all. It is not poverty or silk sheets. It is not made of glass and it is not so breakable that she could crush it between her palms and bleed on white carpet.
Nesta’s not entirely sure what it is, but she knows what it’s not. Knows that it is not fragile, and it does not hang, and it is not painted with decorative leaves that fall in shades of blue.
It is not glass.
But maybe it’s wood, and the next stall, larger than the last, offers an array of furniture and a female that carves and carves never noticing Nesta as she gleans.
On and on she gathers. She walks to the next stall and then the next and the next, not even sure if Cassian is following or if he stayed behind collecting the light that will hang above them like a glittering star.
It’s odd, Nesta thinks as she turns in a sea of unknown faces. She’d spent so much time with her nose raised, she forgot what it was like to stare straight ahead, and… see the world for what it is. Color and wind and sun, and not just walls. A thousand different things she could see, feel, touch… A thousand different things she didn’t have to hate—that she didn’t have to love either but could choose to anyways. So many choices at the tip of her fingers.
As liberating as that thought is, there’s something sad about it still. The world tinted grey, even when the sky is blue.
Even in a crowd of people she is still not where she ought to be. She isn’t at the center, while the world spins around her. Nesta is not where the world ends or where it begins or where it continues. She’s not even sure if she could see her world if she could fly above it. She is not the part that if removed would eradicate all function, all fluidity.
People move around her, whether she stands in place or walks. They laugh with their friends, talk to their family, to shop owners, mumble to themselves. And as Nesta stands, glancing here and there, a thought enters her head. She is still merely at the edge. Hanging off of it? Maybe not. But she could see her feet dangle. See all the rocks below—
“Are you going to buy anything?” The sharp voice cuts through. Nesta manages a quick glance at the older fairy, unaware that she’d been standing by a shelf of framed mirrors.
“I’m sorry. I was—I’m waiting for someone.” She manages, wanting to kick herself for being flustered twice in one day. The female looks pointedly at Cassian who is still talking animatedly with the shop owner.
“Could be a while.” She says, and Nesta can’t help but agree. “Come in while you wait.”
The female moves, lifting the tent flap behind her, revealing a dim, dark space. A hidden place tucked into a corner of the market, larger than the others had been. A tent, Nesta thinks, rather than a stall. With wine-stained cloth enclosing all inside.
Nesta tries not to look to curious at the awaiting female, analyzing every tick of her patient gaze.
“What do you sell here?”
The ominous panels shift, and Nesta wonders if perhaps she asks too many questions. Never trusting the slightest possibility of endangerment, even when it’s disguised as shopping and pretty trinkets.
“A great deal of things.” The fae answers. “But nothing I can show you if you stay here outside.”
Her skin like weathered paper, crinkles as her eyebrows raise in waiting. “There are things you’d like I think.”
“How would you know what I like?”
Without so much as a blink, the fae steps inside, her chipper voice carrying behind the tent flaps. “I don’t expect you to be so different from anyone else.”
It’s those words that bury themselves in her, make a home in her, crawl into her skin, until they all but coat her like a new wool sweater.
For as long as Nesta can remember, she is always the one who’s different. The smart one, the clever one, the quiet, judgmental one, the mean one, the one with the most hostility. Never the one who played nice with the others, who had many friends that ran to her with secrets and gossip. She was not the one they trusted. Not the one they let in.
But not in this world—she’s one of the many in this world. Not one of the few. So, Nesta enters the little shop and wanders.
She walks from one shelf to the next, expects to see marvelous rubies and diamonds with a thousand different colors woven into its shine. Imagines inventions that move when she winds them or talking clocks that sing songs at the end of an hour. Disappointedly, all the shop owner keeps is picture frames.
Nesta stops to stare at a large one, dust covering the worn brass.
A picture of the market appears in its frame, and Nesta blinks at the sudden image. She can make out one of the shopkeepers, children laughing with balloons and candy in their hands. She can even see Cassian in the corner, talking with the fae next door, his hands waving. His head nodding.
“Is it—” Nesta shakes her head in disbelief, “Is it moving?”
The female comes to stand next to her, peering into the image. She smiles, too self-indulgent to be anything but praise and pride. With the glint in her eyes, Nesta almost expects to hear a long-forgotten secret make its way out of her lips. Perhaps where the treasure lies. Or where the golden eggs are hidden. She leans in unconsciously towards her and listens.
“Marvelous, isn’t it?”
She points to one on her left. “This one is Monteserre in winter… and this one depicts the stunning shades of blue in the Night Court stars.”
Nesta follows her down the row as she continues to describe the various pictures that wink and wave and shudder beyond her control.
“This one is my personal favorite, Spring in Dahlias, I call it.”
Nesta looks at the flowers that flutter as if wind has shifted them. She places her hand on the image, her fingers gliding along, expecting to feel soft petals. Nesta only feels the cold glass.
She doesn’t try to keep the awe out of her voice.
“How much are they?”
“They are not for sale.” At Nesta’s furrowed brows, the shop owner explains, a small, conspicuous smile creeping along the edges of her mouth. “I only sell the frames.”
Nesta watches as the shop owner maneuvers behind the first image. The market a bustling and lively place that one could dream of and be satisfied with. “Pictures are a kind of magic, I think… and just like hopes and dreams and memories, we see what we want to see. Feel what we want to feel. ”
The fairy trails her fingers along the brass, hunching over the top to get a better view. As if she had not made the view herself.
“In many ways I made these because I was trapped in places I didn’t want to live in and was myself not someone I wanted to be. They let me escape this world. Even for a moment.” The fairy gazes wistfully at the picture, turning towards Nesta. Her eyes a pale shade of green and self-assured promise. “And later when I didn’t want to escape anymore, they were memories. Little recollections of times I didn’t even consider the magnitude of or how much impact they would have on my life.”
The female steps around the image and Nesta feels the sudden urge to run, though she doesn’t know why. She is in no danger as far as she’s gleaned and even if she were Cassian is only a few stands away. But Her heart thumps regardless, one beat after another, faster and faster, as the shopkeeper continues.
“Hopes, dreams, memories. It’s all simple magic, really. Perhaps the only kind we all possess. Past the names we call ourselves, beyond the masks we wear. I think to master it is to master ourselves.” She takes a cloth out of her pocket and wipes the edges of the frame. “How else can we see things as they truly are?”
“Why do you keep these hidden?” Nesta asks, her voice soft and accusatory. She could hear the light laughter. Mocking her or believing her to be naïve, Nesta didn’t know.
“Because there’s some who’d rather not know what they look like when they don’t know they’re being watched… Others who don’t want to know what magic looks like when it’s not used for violence or war… No, these are for the special few. Those who think too much already. The ones who need to see.”
Nesta shakes her head.
“I don’t understand—” She starts, but Cassian appears through the tent flaps, a box placed carefully in his hands
“There you are. I’ve been looking for you.”
He sets the box down gently at his side, combing his hair with his fingers. A carefree, contented kind of way. “I couldn’t find you anywhere.”
Nesta can feel the urge to roll her eyes but she can’t deny that that something about him makes her feel assured. More calm. Less cautious. As if all the words ever spoken make sense somehow, even if she can’t decipher what they mean. Even if she can’t tell if they’re meant to be dangerous.
“I wasn’t so far away.” A huff in her words. “I was waiting for you, but you took too long.”
“Sorry” Cassian answers, a sheepish grin on his face. “The shop owner wanted to talk about the new policies of land ownership in Prythrian, and once he started, he wouldn’t stop.”
He notices the shopkeeper watching them, an intrigued, curious gleam in her eyes, and nods slightly in her direction, taking his time perusing the items leaning on each wall. A warrior’s assessments that Nesta would find odd in such a place if she had not done so herself.
“Did you find anything you like?” He asks, at last.
Nesta maneuvers to the corner, tracing her fingers along one of the frame’s edges.
She is not a painter like Feyre. She is not hopeful like Elain. She is not brave like Cassian. She is not useful, or pleasant, or trusting… but something in her heart says that she can have this one thing, if only she’d reach out and take it.
Perhaps, Nesta lies when she says she doesn’t want to be like them. Maybe, she’s been waiting for them and them for her and got lost somewhere along the way. Somewhere that was messy and monotonous and crass. Maybe she lets herself get carried away, swept up in the lively fire of anger and the grandeur of being unrelenting and unforgiving.
Perhaps it is also true that Nesta is not like them at all. Maybe she is merely trying on different shoes until she finds one that fits the best, until she can walk in those shoes comfortably, stand in front of every person who means anything to her and look each one of them in the eye.
What will she tell them after it’s all said and done? What will she see reflected back at her?
“I want to get these frames.”
Nesta holds them up for Cassian to see, the brass of one contrasting with the wood of another. She counts three in her palms, but she wants more. She’d take them all home if she could.
“We’ll take these.” Cassian directs his words to the female waiting, “As many as you have.”
He doesn’t ask what she’s going to do with them. Possibly trusts her enough to know about such things, or maybe he doesn’t care at all, Nesta thinks. Maybe Cassian knows she needs this, like he knew she needed all of those books, or the training, or the teasing arguments whenever she was too sad to get out of the house or out of her nightgown. Like all of those games he played with her or the food he set out to have her try. Maybe it was just in his heart to be like that. To be that caring.
Nesta barely notices as the female collects the frames, giving Cassian back his change.
His eyes light up when he’s content, she notes. Not quite green, not quite amber. A little bit eager as he looks at her. Nesta wants to know what it means to be looked at like that. If it’s as dangerous as she always imagines it would be...
Cassian takes the frames out of her hands, holding them for her as they make there way outside. But not before the shopkeeper grabs a hold of his arm and leans towards him.
She holds her hand next to her mouth as if she is telling some secret, and though the statement she says next is directed at Cassian, Nesta still grasps the words.
They float around like music notes, reach her ears, travel down her spine.
The words curl around her heart, burrow in the center of her chest, warming her all over.
Your mate is lovely.
~~~
The mountains have many different names, she learns, and its acres sprout multi-colored flowers. Enduring patches of delicate petals. She passes wisteria, rhododendron, azalea, feels their softness on the tip of fingers. It’s for this reason, Nesta asks to walk some more before they go home.
She spends her time balancing on the raised edge of the sidewalk, Cassian close beside her. Never too far away. Never so distant that she can’t make out his shape or smell his scent or feel the warmth he resonates in the early spring chill.
Her hands are clasped behind her, but she feels a little braver, a little more playful and child-like. Not nearly enough to hold her arms out like she wants to and fit the whole world in the length of them. But she does wobble slightly every now and then, just to see Cassian flinch.
“How did you find the market?” Nesta asks as they reach a clearing of muddy rocks and grass.
“I used to come here when I was young. Azriel, Rhys, and I.” He shakes his head fondly as he remembers. “We used to spend all day here, eating as much as we could and taking more home.”
Nesta waits for him to continue as he passes her, going to sit on the cold ground. His large body at odds with the tiny daisies that sprout in aimless places on the field. She stays behind watching, trying to capture the outline of his figure and every color that bleeds into his skin.
“Actually, I didn’t start coming here until Rhys’s mom took us. She used to sell dresses here and she’d take us with her sometimes. If we behaved, she said she’d get us each our own surprise. It always ended up being food, but sometimes it was new clothes, or toys, or weapons as we got older.”
Nesta can see his fists clump the grass as she gets closer to him, lured by his story and the image of three children running around the market square.
“I don’t know why I remember, but I know we used to steal food when no one was watching, even made a game out of it. Who could take the apple from the crabby goblin? Or how many strawberry tarts could we eat behind the dryads back? The one who always raised her nose at us and complained to Rhys’s mother to.”
Nesta laughs quietly. The sound bright as she pictures a smaller version of him, with rosy cheeks and a penchant for getting in trouble. She wonders if she ever looked that way, too. Innocent and hopeful. Playful and proud.
Nesta wants to say so much to him. Ask him questions about his favorite things, the memories that make his voice sound like he sprinkles sugar atop them. Such sweetness in the light of his smile.
“That sounds fun.” Nesta says, cringing at the perfunctory response.
“It was,” he agrees. “Until we got home and took turns throwing up everything we ate.”
Nesta can’t help the grin that appears, and Cassian knocks his shoulders with hers. His smile reaching his eyes as he looks at her, mirth in the crevices of his mouth.
“You have dimples.” He notes. Nesta touches her cheeks, covering them with her hands. “I didn’t expect you to have them.”
The words sink in before Nesta can decipher what they mean, and she spends the next minutes deciding on an answer, worried more about her response than the stillness that tangles around them. She can feel her teeth pull on her bottom lip, begging her not to say anything.
She never says anything.
“My mother didn’t like them.” Nesta admits, not daring to look at Cassian. “She said that I was born with such a perfect face, it was a pity that the only imperfection she could see was in my smile.”
She shakes her head, staring into the wide expanse of interlacing pinks and marigolds. When did she lose the right to laugh so freely, the freedom of being love drunk and a curious daydreamer? When did life decide she was no longer a child and the only thing she could carry were the memories piled so high and so heavy they were crippling?
“I never wanted to smile in front of her, after… I didn’t want her to look at me and only see what I lacked—how imperfect I really was to her.”
And, Nesta lacked almost everything to her mother. Always talking when she shouldn’t, saying things she could never take back. She was always too moody, too angry, too taciturn. Never what her mother wanted her to be.
Even now she reveals too much and Nesta wants to slap a hand over her mouth, rewind time, start at the beginning where her secrets are kept hidden. Safe in the anger she never hid well.
She can see the questions already forming, something Nesta hopes isn’t pity making a way in the honey tones of his irises.
“I guess I took her words too literally.” Nesta bites, the animosity burning bright red.
Cassian opens his mouth to say something, but Nesta doesn’t want to hear it. Doesn’t even want to know what he could possibly say to take the bitter taste out of her mouth.
“Why did you stop coming here?” She asks accusingly, amazed that she can switch her emotions, like blowing out a candle. One minute a flickering flame, another smoke rising to the mist.
His brows furrow as his eyes darken. Nesta is almost ashamed that she feels proud to have caused such a look. ”You said you used to come here. Why don’t you anymore?”
Cassian grimaces, his wings drifting higher. “No, I don’t come here often.”
His hands wring themselves around and around and Nesta wants to know what he is imagining between his fists. If he hopes to maim as much as she wishes to pummel.
“When she died, I never had the heart to come back. I didn’t want to see where she had walked, where she had laughed, the people she knew so well, and not see her in the midst of it all. There was a part in me, a part in all of us, that was already empty. I didn’t want to see how empty this place had become—what the world looked like without her. So, I just… stopped coming.”
Nesta pauses at his words, suddenly guilty that she is playing a game of whose life turned out worst. There is no winner in daddy issues or absent mothers. No crown for the unwanted, the unclaimed. And she will not find secrets in fingerprints or under the skin her nails dig into. There is only pain.
His and her own.
“Did she come here often?” Nesta asks, her voice steady and soft. His words blinking away the burning sting in her eyes.
“When she could get away—from raising us that is, or some task she had to do for Rhys’s father.” He scoffs. “Raising us mostly. That was all she good for apparently. Never mind that she was smart as all hell and could rival any male Illyrian, trained or no.”
“Do you think she would have been seamstress all her life if she had never mated?”
Nesta doesn’t know why she asks more questions, when she all but ruins the conversation. When they get back, she’s sure she’ll spend hours going over everything she says, marking every tally of moments gone awry. But she wants to salvage as much as she can, wants him to spill the words out so she can collect them like tiny seashells, like parts of a ship already wrecked and abandoned.
Cassian stays silent and Nesta wonders what has trapped him in his head. He stares at the mountains not meeting her gaze and takes his time answering her question. When he does, she can hear the strain of his voice, can see the veins in his hands bulge as he tightens his fists on the grass.
“Illyrians are not… good with females making their own money. They saw, it is as a bad example to the others. No one needed to get ideas, so they gave her more chores, more work. And that was before she had married, so I’m told.” He pulls on the daisies between them. The petals falling in clumps as he grits his teeth. “I can imagine what they would have done if she continued.”
She can feel the anger from Cassian, and feels it rise up inside her, as well. A pain Nesta supposes she shares with all of them, no matter what body she walks in. Like calls to like, she hears Feyre once say.
To be an Illyrian, fae, or human. To be a female, forever young and beautiful. To be a male, always the strongest and most self-assured. To be nothing, but petals and dust. To have it all. To have so little. It was never enough.
In that way, they are the same, she supposes. Both with their feet in the sand, the waves crashing on their ankles. Anger and sadness floating out in that bitter sea she so often drowns in.
Nesta never stops drowning, gives up trying to keep her head above water. She imagines her mouth opening, and a waterfall bursting out. A broken pipe siphoning from an ocean that would never dry. Something explodes out of Nesta. A silence she can no longer keep by holding her lips tightly together.
“My father used to make carvings out of the wood I had to cut,” Nesta holds her palms out as example.
She always expects to see the blisters, count them one by one, as some kind of reminder that she’s suffered. Sometimes, she wishes they’d appear, so she could rub her fingers across them and trace the memories. But they are long gone, and all she can see now are weaving lines and skin.
“I remember being mad at him, so very angry that he’d use the wood that was supposed to be for fires or…food—" She looks towards the bushes, so full and overflowing with berries. What would she have given to have just a taste then? To have these resources growing just outside her door. “He’d sell them, and I still could only thing that it was mine. He’d use my wood, my time, my pain, and it was my money—what I deserved for dealing with a father who could care less about his own daughters.
“I suppose that’s how Feyre felt.” Nesta feels her eyes sting as she stares straight ahead, “And I guess that’s why I understand.”
The anger, she thinks. The sour taste of regret.
Cassian stays oddly quiet as she speaks and Nesta can’t help but be grateful. She does not need to hear sweet coddles as if she needs sympathy, but equally so Nesta doesn’t know what she’d do if she heard criticism. He can’t possibly understand something he’s never lived through, and it makes a part of her furious to think he’d try. But it also makes a deep sadness fill the center of her chest.
Nesta—never to be understood or her sins forgotten.
He stares up at the mountains and she watches as he closes his eyes, his wings lifting slighting at the breeze. “The only thing I remember of my mother is her voice. I don’t remember what color her hair was, how tall she was, even what eye color she had. I can only assume they’re like my own…but that isn’t good enough. Not really.”
Nesta listens carefully to it all.
She’s never heard anything about Cassian’s biological mother and he’s never spoken a word about her, though she often notices how he looks at the others in the camp. The children, the couples, the families he is and will never be a part of. Even sometimes when he looks at her—like he is missing something that nothing in the world can fill.
“I like to imagine that she smelled like the woods, like fresh air… fires…warmth. That she carried me when I was tired and tucked me in when I was sleeping. I liked to imagine that she told me bedtimes stories. I hoped she told me bedtime stories, and I imagined waking up and believing every word that she said the night before. As if she painted my soul, my wants, and my wishes on the edge of my dreams.”
Cassian sighs, his shoulders sinking to the ground as Nesta resists the urge to lay a hand there. She is always trying to resist him, shake the feel of him off of her. A lump forms in the back of her throat, and she clenches her fists to stop the reaching.
“All this time, I could hear her call out my name as if she were screaming right in front of me,” He croaks. His eyes red as he stares, never quite looking at her. “This year, I could barely remember what she sounded like.”
“Why are you telling me this?” She asks, softly, her head resting on her bended knees.
Nesta watches as his grins. His face so obviously despairing that Nesta wants to ask him why he smiles when his heart is broken, why his expression looks so familiar to her. As if she were looking in a mirror as opposed to his war-torn face.
“Maybe all memories fade away, at one point or another. Whether we want them to or not.”
Nesta looks away, leaning back and blinking at the sky quickly turning to its dark cerulean hues. An ocean of darkness, she thinks.
She is always, always drowning.
“Do you miss your mother?” Nesta asks.
Cassian sighs, his hand running through his hair.
“As much as I can miss someone I’ve never known.”
“Do you miss your father?” He questions.
Does she?
Sometimes, it’s hard to tell. Grief looks so strange in Nesta’s eyes, she often wonders if she cares at all.
But she remembers the tombstone she can never visit, the goodbyes that get caught in her throat, the ships she doesn’t even want to look at in fear that she would cry and never stop.
Does she want to miss someone who hurt her so badly?
“More than I wish I did.” Nesta decides.
She looks him over once more before laying down on the grass. The feel of it pillow-soft and cool against her arms. The sky watching over both of them.
“We’re both orphans,” Nesta remarks.
Cassian chuckles, their shoulders touching as he follows suit. Nesta can feel the heat from his body all the way to her toes. “Penniless, parent-less lot, the two of us.”
She stares up at the wide expanse, the stars already peeking through the twilight. The space so substantial and vast it could swallow them whole.
“I suppose we have each other now.”
~~
Amren tells her to think of magic as water. To bathe in it, to wash in it, to let it move around her. Nesta never tells her she’s afraid to take a bath, afraid of what the water might to do her. Even after she put one foot in and another until her whole body is submerged, she’s never wanted to touch that magic she felt just beneath her skin. Never wanted to know just how much it felt like hate.
But, Amren also tells her that if magic is water, her emotions are fire. The more she rages against it, the more she can’t control it. The more she hates the magic, the more it burdens her. Her anger breathes through her, and so the magic evaporates before Nesta can see exactly what it’s made of and what it calls to.
That’s what she tells herself when she stares at the picture frames and nothing appears. Nothing moves and she swears it’s because the magic inside of her does what it wants and doesn’t care at all about her. How could anything care about something that is so miserable and broken.
She scowls at the offending structures leaning lazily on the wall. The picture frames seeming to hum before her. The one Nesta holds in her hands, with its carved mahogany, glares at her to get on with it.
Nesta supposes it would be easier if she knew what images she wanted to appear. She can think of nothing, though she tries all morning, all last week, and all the way back to Windhaven when they make it back from the market.
Nesta sits back and sighs, her head bumping on the new couch they are still deciding on where to place.
The problem, it seems, is that Nesta can think of no good times worth remembering. She has seldom laughed with unutterable joy at the jokes her friends make. She has no friends. She can’t imagine the famous blooming roses of Rask or the briny beaches of Vallahan. She has never been anywhere. She doesn’t want to be reminded of Velaris, where she can still smell the putrid scent of puke and whiskey. An image would merely remind her of the headaches she gets with even a whiff of alcohol.
She moves on to people, but she is not inclined to dwell on any of them either. In fact, Nesta doesn’t want to think of them at all. And so Nesta sits there, resigning to the belief that she was born to be good at nothing…
Some part of her knows she’s scared.
The stiff spine, the wringing hands, the focused gaze. It isn’t an enemy that stands before her, but—Nesta inhales—there is too much that hasn’t been said.
She doesn’t want to know what her mind thinks of when she loosens the reigns. Amren has taught her so many times to keep those shields up, it seems counterintuitive to break them down now. But mostly, Nesta doesn’t want to know what magic looks like. She’s spent so much time denying it’s even there, that the idea of letting it move freely makes her feel wild—her spooked horse-like tendency to see all things as fearful even if they were smaller than her and she could stomp on them easily.
Nesta sets the frame down, the base screeching against the hardwood without leaving a scratch. Her fingers tapping along her thigh to some unnamed melody she can barely recall.
Her powers are always a mystery to her. Never to be understood, never to be forgotten. They are always there. She imagines its depth, the endlessness like drowning in a cauldron, the questions forming in the space between morphing bodies. Human to fae or… something or other.
Nesta tries to silence these questions, but she is simply too curious.
Will the magic shoot out of her hands, follow the sound of her voice, grant her wishes? Will it twist around her spine so that every time she uses it, she’ll feel a twinge in her back and a terrible need to bend and crumble? Will it spit fire out of her mouth like those roaring insults meant to bite and hide her away?
Is it hollow like a hole never filled? Does it echo like a rock in a well? Will it squirm? Eating her from the inside out.
Nesta does not want to know, she asserts, does not even want to imagine what the others have called powerful and strange.
But she can name one type of magic.
It was there that day. Between the two of them.
Nesta thinks about the idea of them several times. Even before she ever lives in this cabin. Long before she lets herself think about them together like that. The image always there, always waiting, and always agonizing.
She lets herself dwell on it now for the picture appears.
Maybe not a memory. Maybe not a dream.
In the space between mahogany lines, Nesta traces her fingers along the glass and brings it closer to her. The appearance finer than paint and perhaps more vibrant. She is almost afraid to look at it for long, fearing that it will change into something dark and horrid. But there they lay.
The two of them.
On that hill of vibrant green. The specks of white and yellow dusting their skin. A blanket of beautiful things she’d like to wrap them in, across both of their shoulders where dust and time had settled. This Cassian looks down, a soft grin on his face, pulling his arms around tighter, wrapped around this—this girl who looks a lot like her and nothing like her at all.
This girl grins. A wide and happy smile, her cheeks brimming and a lively red. Nesta watches as the girl in the picture with her hair and her eyes, leans her head on his shoulder. Both of them so close and so…loved.
Nesta hates this girl. Immediately chastises this young thing.
This girl who never sees terror or feels the deepest regrets. Who never knows starvation for touch and affection. Who never looks at the world with its hatred and despair and is just so hungry that she eats them like scraps of food left on the dinner table. This girl doesn’t know pain—
Nesta breathes deeply. Her fist only inches away from punching the glass into oblivion.
Or maybe she does… Perhaps this girl, this young, naïve, hopeful girl sees it all—feels it all, as she does, but smiles as Nesta always wishes she could, remaining free and unencumbered like no Nesta has ever been before. Perhaps this Nesta knows what it’s like to feel the raging disappointment and instead of soaking it up and bottling it for later, she tells stories instead, laughs instead, thrives instead.
Despite the pain. Regardless of the memories.
Nesta does not destroy the image. Whether its some dream manifested or some cosmic joke, the magic is there. Her power is in the center of it all and it is not cruel or angry or crass.
It’s water…and if it is, she’s made of it. There is no separation between who she is and what the magic makes her. There is no way to pull it out and leave the whole of her behind. As much as she wants to pretend it isn’t there, she can more dismiss that it exists than she can claim that air doesn’t take space in the atmosphere or that she doesn’t dream strange, improbable dreams.
Pretending doesn’t equate to truth.
So, Nesta leans the finished, moving frame on the living room wall and picks up another. The lavender paint reminding her strangely of dinner parties.
Nesta makes so many, fills all of the frames of different sizes and shapes and colors with moments she not only remembers, but of those she wishes to see—the pictures she needs to see.
Of Cassian with that group of friends she almost always resents. Of Amren and her, in that tiny apartment with puzzles strewn about. Of the camp and the raging, rising females who lay claim on her and treat her like one of them. Of the stories she swallows and the worlds that swallow her, that she can feel in the pit of her stomach.
Of her sisters. Because she loves them.
More than herself, most days.
She fills the walls with them all. The snow, and city lights, and night stars, and mountain tops filling the backgrounds, quietly saying hello, goodbye, stay a while. We promise you’ll like it here. We promise to be good to you.
Nesta straightens each one.
The one of her and Cassian though, she hides. Behind her bookshelf, where it won’t taunt her with its hopeful dreams, with its lies it tells so truthfully.
That one can wait.
When the night arrives, Nesta goes to the doorway and the moon scrutinizes her as she waits for the tell-tale sign of wings that signals Cassian’s return. It’s silvery sheen ordering her to do more this time, than watch from the living room window.
She is not the one trapped behind glass.
His feet hit the pavement as the crack of the open door reveals him. She is not a painter like Feyre, but she counts all the shades of indigo and wine that form the backdrop as he steps towards her. The stars as alive as each person who stares at her from those picture frames and blinks.
He looks at her cautiously, waiting for her response, but she takes his arm instead. Pulling him toward the day’s work.
She doesn’t ask him what he thinks, what he can read through gazes on his family’s faces, but she watches as he scans over the images, taking his time assessing each one.
She swallows when he looks back at her, and Nesta braces for the response. Will he deny her visions, her hopes and her wishes? Will he call her out for moving too fast? Will he knock all of them off the wall and yell?
Worst of all, will he say nothing? Her wants not even worth a response.
Cassian places his hand on her cheek. She feels his thumb trace her skin where it burns and if he moves any lower, he can probably hear her heart thumping wildly. And even if she’s scared beyond belief, Nesta still leans into his palm.
She closes her eyes, clenches her fists, and waits for that crippling fear.
Nesta feels the hot press of his mouth instead.
He pulls her to him, his arms moving to her waist as hers wrap around his neck.
His lips are soft, and she leans into him, tastes him, soaks him into her skin. Not at all sure what she should be thinking. Not thinking at all.
But Cassian pulls away far too soon, and when she opens her eyes again, his cheeks are brimming red. Nesta doesn’t say anything and neither does he, but she can feel him in the silence. Joy in deep breaths. Warmth she can feel to her toes.
She turns as he does, back to the images on the wall. Their shoulders almost touching as Nesta fiddles with her neckline and Cassian smiles neatly.
The two of them beaming.
The people of their pictures dreaming their own little dreams.
She will not be afraid of memories. She will not be afraid to hope.
~
Tags: @dreaming-of-bohemian-nights , @missing-merlin, @strangeenemy, @saltydreamcollector, @midnightbluhm, @my-fan-side, @queenofillea1, @tswaney17, @gloriousinlove, @ekaterinakostrova, @thebluemartini, @anishake, @lord-douglas-the-third, @mis-lil-red
AN:
I wanted this part to be a battle for Nesta. Happiness and Sadness are two sides of the same coin, and I wanted Nesta to constantly toss it and I wanted it to be a fight against what she hoped it would land on. I didn’t want to write her one day getting over it all, because I don’t really think that’s true. Healing, after all, is the ugliest part. So, this chapter ends a little hopeful but bittersweet and it will probably remain that way for the rest of it.
I split this chapter up, so we have one more part 4/4. And then the last segment which I may or may not ever get to called “Love is Bright Red, Hope is Dark Blue” which is more about the inner circle and their part in all of this. Since I think it’s easier for Nesta and Cassian to love each other in the dark so to speak and maybe not in front of their family. But, I haven’t written any of it, and to be frank, I only sometimes like writing this fic and I want to move past this. So, I will not make any promises.
But I hope everyone is doing well. It’s an odd time to be alive right now, and I really hope everyone is staying home and staying healthy. Oh btw, I’ve read Crescent City. It’s such a good book! I was amazed but not at all surprised. SJM always writes the books I want to read so there’s that.
Anyways, thank you for sticking with this fic, I know I take forever to update, but every comment, kudos, like, and reblog mean the world to me and tbh, the constant comments are the only reason I have even made it this far.
Of course, if you like this second to last end part, please feel free to do just that! I always love what you guys comment. I’m out! Finally
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A STUDY IN CHARACTER LAYERS.
——— slight mentions of: drugs, death
LAYER 001 : THE OUTSIDE.
NAME. zhang qiu / “cho chang”.
EYE COLOR. light brown.
HAIR STYLE / COLOR. black, although more of a dark brown in most lights. she usually wears it down, if not in a neat bun at the office or a nice plait during matches.
HEIGHT. 5′3″
CLOTHING STYLE. black jeans! athletic shorts! small pieces of statement jewelry! turtlenecks! sleeveless tops with lacy straps! rayon blouses with 3/4 sleeves! tapered slim-fit pantsuits! shoes with some height that also pair with many different outfits! muggle hoodies supporting the local rugby and football teams! she “borrows” her partner’s tees and sweaters and casual wear, so lol add those to the list. she’s big on practicality and comfort over flair and height of fashion, but she does like keeping up with trends and coordinating her outfits to reflect that.
BEST PHYSICAL FEATURE. her smile! it’s absolutely very cliche, but when she smiles and her nose does that crinkly thing and her eyes get all starry, it’s very unfair how powerful it is. alternatively, she also has a great ass, so there’s that.
LAYER 002 : THE INSIDE.
FEARS. losing people she loves. having someone d*e during a healing procedure and her mind just shutting down during it.
GUILTY PLEASURE. parfaits! going for a late night fly! being on top!!!
BIGGEST PET PEEVE. people who sneeze/cough without covering their mouth and nose. people in the magical community who somehow think muggles are “less developed” or “behind” without magic, when they’re the ones who haven’t even moved beyond printed news and radios to circulate current events and pop culture tbh.
AMBITIONS FOR THE FUTURE. to successfully campaign for a british seat at the international confederation of wizards (delegate timeline); to patent a line of at-home salves and develop at least one healing spell by the end of her residency (healer timeline); to just be the best mom and partner possible, honestly! (divorced verse)
LAYER 003 : THOUGHTS.
FIRST THOUGHTS WAKING UP. huh. 6 AM already?
THINKS ABOUT MOST. how other people are doing.
THINKS ABOUT BEFORE BED. any of the interactions she might have had that day.
WHAT THEY THINK THEIR BEST QUALITY IS. her ability to depend on herself. her sociability. her commitment to fight for what’s right.
LAYER 004 : WHAT’S BETTER ?
SINGLE OR GROUP DATES. single (unless you’re harry potter and have to meet up with hermione later in the day). group dates are sometimes useful for gauging potential partners’ ability to crack on with her friends, though.
TO BE LOVED OR RESPECTED. loved. respected. both?
BEAUTY OR BRAINS. brains— for herself and for a potential partner. BUT i can’t lie, if we’re being really honest here, i’m absolutely tempted by the idea of cho being with a heart-of-gold jock whose sole purposes in life are to get gains, look good, and love cho. cho x himbo king is canon btw; the muggle she marries is a *checks notes* brickhouse rugby player who rescues animals on the side and doesn’t know the first thing about how getting sick works but will gladly and fondly listen to her explain everything from antibodies to the common cold to why wearing a mask helps.
DOGS OR CATS. both.
LAYER 005 : DO THEY…
LIE. not really, and never with bad intentions. as she gets older, she learns to use it more for self-preservation.
BELIEVE IN THEMSELVES. yes.
BELIEVE IN LOVE. yes. always.
WANT SOMEONE. no. in her divorced verse, the answer strays more toward yes.
LAYER 006 : HAVE THEY EVER…
BEEN ON STAGE. yes. ravenclaw common room parties are a whole event. terry boot may or may not have the negatives of the one time she sang karaoke to abba’s “dancing queen” on roger davies’s 17th birthday.
DONE DRUGS. yes. her muggle psychiatrist recommended medical mar*juana to cope with the very rare night terrors. she tried it for a little while, and it worked, but she ultimately prefers the calming potions made by healer pye. she used sleeping draughts for a little while after the war (who didn’t), but she hasn’t used them since.
GOTTEN DRUNK. lmao yes. me, ess the mun, cupping my hands around my mouth: baby girl’s a light weight, y’all!
CHANGED WHO THEY WERE TO FIT IN. no. part of the reason we read about her experiencing ostracization at school (through harry’s pov) was because she didn’t waver in her defense of marietta and was quite open with her emotions (although she ended up having to repress a large part of her grief and anger anyway). she’s very firm about sticking to her resolutions and not bending who she is in order to do that. (that might get slightly lost in romantic relationships, though.) in her moved-to-the-muggle-world verse, she definitely changes her external habits and way of living to blend in, but it’s not so much a change of her character or her person.
LAYER 007 : FAVORITES.
FAVORITE COLOR. beige. light purples. dark greens.
FAVORITE ANIMAL. swans.
FAVORITE MOVIE. the princess bride (1986). in the mood for love (2000). miss congeniality (2000). remember the titans (2000). 2000 was clearly a big year for her and movies.
FAVORITE GAME. lmao as if it would be anything other than quidditch! i’m not exactly sure how fans keep up with the sport if they’re not watching in-person, but when league cup season rolls around, the television is on, the radio is tuned, the newspaper articles about game highlights and star players are read, the plumpton tutshill jersey is ritualistically worn...
LAYER 008 : SLEEP.
HEAVY OR LIGHT SLEEPER. light sleeper.
WHAT SIDE OF THE BED DO THEY SLEEP ON. the right side— when she shares a bed with someone, it’s more comfortable for her to cuddle up to them if they’re on her left. in her divorced verse, she sleeps on whatever part of the bed the kids didn’t claim in the middle of the night.
WHAT DO THEY WEAR TO BED. old quidditch stuff— she has one or two ravenclaw scrimmage jerseys that are so old the house insignia’s already faded away. she also has endless tutshill tornadoes shirseys and tees that she’s worn and washed so often that the fabric’s become so soft now and is definitely susceptible to hem stitches unraveling. her favorite sleepwear combo is a pair of cotton boyshorts and to go braless under one of her oversized tutshill tees. comfortable— and as flattering and as easy access as possible, for those nights.
WEIRD THINGS THEY DO IN THEIR SLEEP. she mumbles a lot sometimes.
LAYER 009 : LOVE.
BIG DECLARATIONS OR SMALL. small, from her end, but she’s extremely appreciative (and only a little embarrassed) of big declarations toward her.
OPEN OR CLOSED OFF. open, although she wisely exercises caution with some people and thus becomes more closed off.
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT OR SLOW BURN. slow burn! this is also me, ess, exposing myself for my love of a good slow burn.
ONE TRUE LOVE OR A STRING. a string, but maybe it leads to comfortably settling into that true love. she definitely doesn’t believe that there is only and exactly one love out there for each person. that myth is a terrible and disheartening way to go about life, frankly.
LAYER 010 : FINISH THE SENTENCE.
I LOVE. "...that things do get better. my friends. the people i consider my family. my children (added for divorced verse).”
I FEEL. "...insignificant, in the grand scheme of things. content with where i am, usually. but mostly, i tend to feel everything, unfortunately all at once.”
I HIDE. “...the parts of my feelings that lead into anger.”
I MISS. "...the simpler days. hogwarts days, honestly.”
I WISH. "...i could have had more time. to do things. to be with people. to enjoy certain moments. sorry— a bit vague, huh?”
tagged by: @gramenviride ( 💕 ) tagging: lol i’ve already tagged a lot of you in these dash games/character studies and likely blew up your notifications over the last week; this turned out pretty long and might use more brain power than usual, so i’m gonna go with a general call for anyone that sees this and wants to fill this out to please do it! and tag me if you do!
#indiecho character study#this was just an opportunity for me to hurl all of my headcanons at you; if you read through this whole thing i appreciate you sm#lol this was indeed a lot of things to just blast onto the dash but. i was given a platform and i have many thoughts what can i say!
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It seems like a few of you agreed that Ubisoft mishandled the Gods in more than a few ways, and I’m still mad about it so I just want to go through and explain how they were so poorly represented. I will concede that there are more than a few ‘right’ ways to represent a God and it all comes down to your own interpretation of the Gods and their myths, but I think in general, Ubisoft really fell short. My personal interpretations come from my major in Classics and my worship of the Greek and Roman pantheons, so my opinions on this will reflect those interpretations but feel free to have and share your own!
Let’s start simple. Juno. Juno is a really interesting Goddess, both in religion and in the games. I, personally, don’t do anything special for Hera/Juno/Uni, but I know that she is an incredibly loving Goddess and is remarkably loyal to her husband and those she holds dearly. Now, I think Ubisoft did Juno okay, only because her loving and loyal nature can make her a fierce enemy, and I think Ubisoft showed that well. She, from my knowledge, is a main antagonist in the series, and given that “modern” Rome is a part in Ezio’s story, that makes sense. Juno was NOT a supporter of the foundation of Ancient Rome. She made several attempts to keep Aeneas from getting to Italy and she is openly not a fan of Aeneas, given his Trojan heritage and his role in Rome’s founding. Basically, her being an antagonist makes sense and I don’t think it really devalues her as a Goddess at all.
This is, unfortunately, where the praise ends. I’ll just go in order, so Persephone is next. Persephone is, perhaps, the biggest victim in this mess Ubisoft created. I would like to first clarify a few things regarding Persephone as a Goddess. How you choose to view her relationship with Hades doesn’t really matter to me—that’s something only you can decide, but there are a few aspects that are important to consider. First of all, beyond the initial kidnapping and drama with that, there’s not too much suggesting they had a rocky relationship. There were a few minor hiccups, but nothing major. And two, going on Ancient Greek standards, Hades did nothing wrong. Now, kidnapping is bad, we know this. Except, Hades didn’t really kidnap her, per se. He asked Zeus for her hand in marriage and Zeus agreed. Hades actually did the “right” thing, though in a twisted way that really isn’t acceptable in today’s standards. All that said and done...all I can say is what was Ubisoft thinking? I mean, Persephone is routinely a benefactor for heroes *who come to her* and she is mostly portrayed as incredibly benevolent. The fact that Ubisoft made her a borderline tyrant with a unreasonable desire for total order and control and made her relationship with Hades one of the worst depictions I’ve ever seen is upsetting. It’s tragic, really. I almost feel like I have to personally apologize to Her whenever I think about what they did to her.
I’ll keep Hermes and Hekate short and sweet because they got off a bit easier than Persephone did. All I have to say is both Gods are insultingly shallow in the dlc. Hermes is blinded by his love for Persephone, and while he definitely did pursue her in the myths, he didn’t dwell on the unrequited feelings—he is a powerful God of many things, he doesn’t need to dwell on it. And Hekate was given the short end of the stick between the two and she became the backstabbing friend. We honestly don’t learn much about her at all and she’s made to be extremely unlikable, which is not the aura given from the Goddes Herself. It’s a shame what happened to these two.
Now we will move to Hades. My biggest issue with Hades is actually the whole issue with continuity between Jupiter/Zeus/Tinia being the same but Pluto/Hades/Aita not being the same, but alas, Ubisoft totally butchered his character as well, so I can put aside my grievances about the continuity. Hades is portrayed as this chaotic antagonist who really only has his own benefit in mind which is...an extremely confusing interpretation. I mean, Hades is, IMO, the least chaotic God out there. And even more so, he isn’t a vicious leader like they make him out to be. Sure, he maintains order in the Underworld with an iron fist, but that’s just the issue. The Hades seen in Odyssey is...not that. He doesn’t maintain order at all, and yet he’s doing something with a very aggressive iron fist. He’s power hungry, angry, and violent, and all of that goes unchecked until Kassandra/Alexios rolls around to stop it for the time being. The Hades I worship isn’t like that at all, and I don’t think the Ancient Greeks viewed him that way either, though I can’t say for certain.
Charon is next and I don’t have too much to say about him. He’s just so forgettable in my opinion. Charon is the ferryman of the dead, so I suppose he’s not supposed to leave a lasting impression, but he takes on the role of maneuvering you through the Underworld—a job he, historically, doesn’t have. His job is to take you across the River Styx and then be done with you. It’s a relatively minor complaint really, but I would’ve liked to see his character fleshed out a bit more.
Down to the last three, and Poseidon is up. The issue I have with Poseidon is kind of a personal one. Poseidon, while not one of my primary deities, is one of those that I frequently turn to and worship more frequently, so naturally his rather bland portrayal was disappointing at best and insulting at worst. I personally don’t think he gets much character development at all, which is unfortunate because Poseidon, as a God and in the myths, is incredibly complex. He’s a great asset if he’s on your side, but he can also be a very formidable foe, and they seem to want to show those two sides but they really fall short on both. Now, this could be related to the fact that of the three dlcs, Atlantis truly felt the most rushed. You have hardly any time to really take in the story and the whole thing just seems like one big after thought, and Poseidon, unfortunately, took the hit with that. Also, he just passes judgement and in a way rule over Atlantis over to a mortal, which I get is important to the story, but why? That’s so not how things are done.
Now we have Aita. So for those of you who don’t know or haven’t figured it out by now, Aita is the Etruscan God of the Underworld. I’ve already explained my main issue with him, and how he and Hades should be the same, but honestly, that’s the least of the crimes committed against him. In my opinion, Ubisoft has completely striped Aita of his Godhood. All of the other shown deities have this natural feeling to them that Aita lacks. He seems so lackluster standing next to Juno and he’s reduced to this scientist role, which—don’t get me wrong—is neat and powerful and all, but this is the Etruscan god of the underworld! Why should he linger in the shadows of Juno when he could be an equal to her, all things considered! I know the Etruscan gods/pantheon are not as widely known, but that doesn’t make them less godly, and what they’ve done to him is upsetting to say the least. I would love to see some other Etruscan gods, like Tinia and Uni, and I would like for them to be treated with the respect they deserve. More people could know about this fascinating culture and religion! Is that too much to ask?
Finally, we get to Aletheia. Now, she is a bit different in that I don’t know of many myths surrounding the goddes of truth, and it’s totally possible that she may solely be a representation of truth more so than a character in the myths. Aletheia’s story was...anticlimactic. I honestly don’t think her story got resolved at all. Ubisoft left me feeling like there was more we needed to know about her, and they also implied that she isn’t exactly a good guy. I mostly just want more from her. I think if they play on Juno being related to her, they could really make a very good story, but as it is, Aletheia got put on the back burner, and that? That is unfortunate.
This is already a very long post, so I won’t continue, but I would like to mention that characters like Adonis, the Greek heroes, Elpis, and Atlas received similarly disappointing treatment from Ubisoft. Let me know if you want me to make a post about them! I encourage you guys to share your own thoughts on this! Different perspectives yield different reactions and I’d love to see y’alls, so feel free to share! I will remind you that these are living Gods. Part of why this was so upsetting is because I research these gods as part of my studies and because I actively worship many of Them. Seeing Them reduces to these characters was...not the greatest feeling in the world. It’s important to separate the characters from the myths and even the myths from the Gods themselves, but what Ubisoft did was make a character that loosely relates to the myths—not the Gods Themselves as well. Just as Zeus is so much more than his myths, Persephone is more than the character Ubisoft gave us, so think critically when absorbing content about religious figures. All Gods of all religions are deserving of respect, and Ubisoft did not do a great job with that. I can only hope they will do better for the Viking Gods.
#ac odyssey#fate of atlantis dlc#me talking#i tried to tone down my anger#hopefully it worked lol#i also tried to condense some of my grievances#for yalls sake#long post#please tell me if the keep reading didnt work
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Hi hello I hope you're doing well and getting read to sn00ze soon, STS! Saturday! Yes! Cause you're an artist and a writer, I was wondering how much the two mediums bleed into each other? Does drawing something out help you visualise it better, or do they not really interact much at all?
hello hi hey there and happy storyteller saturday :D thank you for the question!! I hope ur having a cool day B)
and even though you sent this yesterday you telling me to sn00ze is equally applicable today as it is almost every day of the week so................ yep, I’ll be sure to get onto that at some point. you’re probably going to make a >:c face at me for answering this at 3:06am
anyway! this is an interesting question! and a good one! unfortunately it may not have a very interesting answer?
my initial response was gonna be that they don’t really bleed into each other at all, but then........ nah, they kinda do
(and then about halfway through typing this draft I was like But What About Undertow, and my response became “oh yeah they definitely do”, but I’ll get to that in a bit)
but yeah! I think my writing definitely influences my art! both in the sense that I tend to draw mostly story stuff, ‘cause I like my stories and drawing is fun, but also in terms of like....... inspiration! usually I have a pretty good image of stuff in my head already while I’m writing, n sometimes this image will make me go “hell yeah I vibe with this I wanna draw it”, but the art itself generally turns out nothing like what I envision and usually takes a life of its own ‘cause I’ll just end up drawing whatever looks cool hahahaha
so I get some neat experiments and doodles and weirdness in various art pieces that definitely stemmed from story daydreams, but probably aren’t super related to the story itself in the end :P y’all don’t see much of this stuff ‘cause I mostly just post character drawings lmao
(this is bc I’m most confident with character drawings, and I will fistfight Drawing Backgrounds And Scenes in a wendy’s parking lot any day of the week)
but kinda hopping back up for a sec, one example that IS related to the story is like
drawings I’ve done that are centred in ATDAO’s unreality aren’t actually a super good representation of what the unreality is actually like? or I mean. they could be. they can be! but the drawings are centred around very literal concrete representations of glitchy weirdness
whereas in the story itself (at least to start with) there’s much more a focus on the general looming Hey Something Is Horribly Wrong vibes and, like, the unravelling and bleeding together of senses, the way the narration changes (ie the way your own thought processes slowly start becoming completely foreign to you), n just........ glitchy weirdness, but not glitchy weirdness that you can visually represent, glitchy weirdness that is canonically in the category “you can experience this and have no way to process it because a human mind is not equipped to translate it and your senses have no way of taking it in”
n then I bring the body horror in full force but that’s neither here nor there
existential terror and uncanny valley vibes r hard to draw, y’know? so the drawings mostly just wind up as me having fun with the aesthetic hahaha
but yeah, art stuff stems from story daydreams, it’s very rare that story stuff will stem from art daydreams
character drawings were something I started doing just ‘cause I liked my characters and I was vibin, but they ended up being the one exception in that they DO tend to actively inspire the decisions I make in the story itself, unlike my other art
written descriptions of people are a weak point for me, generally I’ll kinda know at least the key aspects of what folks look like, but the descriptions I come up with on page are always frustratingly vague............. n drawing them out helps me fill in the blanks and give my descriptions a bit more life and personality IMO, ‘cause I mean
there’s little things about people’s appearances that are pretty personal, little quirks or habits they have, etc, that I wouldn’t think of in writing, whereas in art they just crop up naturally
and also sometimes I’ll write a description of a character or have an image of them in my head and I’ll be like Yeah This Is Them but then when I draw them my hands will just make their own decisions
and whatever the hands create is Law and Official Canon as far as I’m concerned, I will always trust the hands over my initial plans when it comes to characters, and they have not failed me so far
and now that I’ve gone on a whole spiel about how (outside of helping me pin down character details) creating art isn’t generally something that inspires a lot of story development or daydreams, it’s time for me to completely contradict that because, like I said earlier: Undertow
this is a WIP that came into existence purely from art inspiration! basically I came up with Aster’s design on the fly because someone was like “it’s genderqueer pride day” and I was like Oh Sick Time To Make A New Genderqueer OC
most of the characters in Undertow were drawn and designed long before I had any clue who they were or what their deal was. the entire premise of Aster as a character was born within like two hours from one silly doodle. then I was like “BUT WHAT IF SHE HAD FRIENDS” so I drew some friends, who ended up being Kit and Meg. n their relationships with each other and the kind of story in which they find themselves all just kind of spiralled out from a series of silly doodles and took on a life of their own :P
I think it’s a different scenario since Undertow exists purely as a vessel for shenanigans and self-indulgent nonsense, so I was feeling a lot less pressure to be grounded and serious, I could just throw things around like “amnesiac clairvoyant delivery driver with an illegal magic crime truck” and “necromancer who doesn’t believe in magic who wants to reanimate a t-rex to honour his dead wife” to see what stuck and I had no need to be like “hm, but is that Realistic, though?”
unrestrained summer fun!
it’s easier for me to let myself daydream in relation to art when there’s none of this pressure, which I think is what separates Undertow from my other projects c:
plus Undertow is the one WIP of mine that I’ve always pictured in a kind of episodic comic format, though I lack the skill set or the patience to pull this off hahaha
as such, most of my development for it comes in the form of messing around with the artistic side of things!! as it should be, I think
anyway that’s enough from me I think, thanks for reading, have a fantastic day, hope you see some cool birds (if you do please tell me about them)
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