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onlysanepeoplesleep · 1 year ago
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possible tw: brief mention of an eating disorder and body dysmorphia (implied but it’s barely there??).
There was no doubt when someone said Kevin was beautiful or pretty. Everyone complemented his looks, even Tetsuji had said that his looks could be used and he should use them. He hadn’t understood when he was younger what that meant exactly, but he understood now.
You could get anything just by having a pretty face and an eye-catching body. Maybe that’s why he was put on strict diets in the Nest. So the photoshoots they took months later would show his slim waist and lean figure. Riko always said his eyes were the prettiest part about him, and thus were meant to be kept unharmed.
His face never showed any sign of the abuse he had received in the Nest, even years after people still believed he had had it easy. Maybe that’s why he hated his self-image so much, why he stared at the mirror for seconds longer than he should. Why he hated eating anything above the calorie intake he was meant to. Because he had had it easy. Life had been easy for him, he shouldn’t worry others with his problems because he didn’t have any.
He was fine because he wasn’t traumatised. He wasn’t hurt the way Neil or Jean were. He didn’t have lasting scars except for the one on his left hand — and even that wasn’t as bad as the ones Jean or Neil carried.
Everything was fine. He was fine. Nothing was wrong.
And yet… if something wasn’t wrong, if he was truly okay — then why did he still have nightmares? Why did he awake abruptly at night drenched in sweat and riddled with fear? Maybe he was a coward, why else would he have nightmares when his experiences in the Nest had been nothing compared to what Jean suffered. What Neil suffered. Why should he have nightmares when Neil woke from them more frequently? When Kevin didn’t deserve to be traumatised because he wasn’t.
Everybody believed that was true so why shouldn’t he?
Betsy would probably say it wasn’t good to think like that. It wasn’t healthy to undermine his own trauma (which he didn’t have) just because someone else experienced the same things — just differently. She’d tell him to focus on his own nightmares and focus on trying to heal, but what was there to heal from if he was fine? Because he was. He was fine, as fine as one could be.
So he didn’t deserve the small reassurances his friends gave him. Didn’t deserve any kind of affection from them especially because it should be the other way round, but Kevin’s not sure how to comfort people and he knows he should know because if he’s fine and everything in his life has been fine up until this point — then how come he can’t give solace to those whose lives aren’t?
Why must he be so selfish and rude and stupid and a coward? Riko hardly did anything to him. He wasn’t beaten as much as Jean, he wasn’t tortured as much as Neil, he wasn’t broken. He survived the Nest and was fine, so that meant he had no room to argue with those who didn’t. Those who were braver then him. Who endured the pain because they didn’t know much else.
Kevin had the key to his cage whereas Neil and Jean didn’t. That was the difference. That was why he was fine and they weren’t. That’s why they needed to be loved and cared for and he didn’t.
He was not fine. He hadn’t been fine in years, but he’d never voice that aloud. He’d never disagree when someone said he had it lucky; when they said he was spoiled for thinking he didn’t. Whatever horrors he had been through in the Nest didn’t matter because in the end, the only way for people to realise just how broken you truly were was if they had visible evidence. And in that, Kevin was lacking.
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smolldust · 8 months ago
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More signs of life fanart cuz the new chapter was awesome
also eclipse is a whore and I love him <3
Beings Made of Stardust AU by @maudiemoods
Signs of Life fic by @jackofallrabbits
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sukunasbow · 2 years ago
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avoiding reality, daryl dixon.
summary: in which you avoid your boyfriend when you find out you’re pregnant, unsure of what to do with a baby in the middle of the apocalypse!
warnings: pregnant!reader, fem!reader, and not yet proof read because it’s late atm sorry!
notes: once again i wanna give fair warning that i am not the best at the pregnancy or children trope so please be patient!
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Two days ago, you went on a run with your boyfriend to get food supplies from a rundown store, secretly stealing a cheap box of tests after you noticed you were late on your period. You’ve been good at keeping track of it so far, so you knew something was off. Your suspicions were obviously right, as you took the test later that night and it came back positive. Unsure of what to do and how Daryl would react, you chose the path of avoiding him, skipping out on the last few supply runs, as well as even keeping more distance between you and the man. He’s obviously taken notice to it, trying to start conversation with you and asking around if anyone knows what’s up with you. You couldn’t tell him, you were scared.
Now, you’re sitting up in the guard tower, staring out into the distance, ignoring the sound of Judith’s cries from inside the prison. It’s just another reminder of your predicament, causing you to close your eyes, your stomach squirming nervously.
“Ay!” The voice causes you to open your eyes, scaring you senseless. It’s Daryl. You shuffle closer to the fencing on the platform of the tower, looking down to see Glenn and your boyfriend standing together, weapons in hand. “We’re going on a run, come with us!” Daryl calls out again, moving his hand to shield his face from the sun and get a better look at you, hoping you’ll finally join him and get out of the prison for a bit.
“I’m gonna stay here and keep watch.” You yell back, instantly feeling bad when you notice his expression fall, clearly feeling upset.
“Maggie can take over.” Glenn adds. You let out an annoyed sigh. Obviously Glenn doesn’t know why you’re skipping the runs, but seriously, you wish he had stayed quiet. “Ya!” Daryl nods, confirming that Glenn’s wife would be willing to take over for the day.
“I don’t really feel like going.” You stay firm on your decision, despite the weird looks between Glenn and your boyfriend.
“Hold up.” Daryl says to Glenn, putting down his crossbow and walking towards the tower, opening the door and making his way up the stairs to talk to you.
Your eyes widen when he opens the second door, making his way out onto the balcony you’re sitting on. “Daryl, it’s fine, I’m just tired.” You insist. “Ya, bullshit, girl. I know ya, ya never miss runs, something’s up.” He scoffs, his southern tone harsh. He sits down next to you, waiting for your explanation. “I’m not lying.” You whisper. “Did I do something?” He questions you. “Daryl, I already told you, nothing’s wrong.” You shake your head. The stubborn man starts ranting about how he knows you, again. You let out a sigh, before opening your mouth.
“You really wanna know why I’m skipping all the runs and avoiding you?!” You huff, interrupting him, deciding you’ve had enough.
Your boyfriend nods.
“I’m pregnant, okay?!” You snap. Obviously, you were loud, as you hear Glenn audibly gasp, then the sound of gravel getting kicked around as he walks away and decides to wait in the truck.
You turn your attention back to Daryl, biting your lip, anxiously waiting for a response. His eyes are slightly wide, but the rest of his face remains serious.
Suddenly, he reaches his arms out and holds your hands. “Your really pregnant? You took a test?” He smiles. The smile is instantly relieving, causing you to nod, a small smile appearing on your face as well. “We’re gonna be good parents, hm?” Daryl pulls you in for a hug. “You’re going to be the best dad.” You reassure him. “And you’ll be a great mom, ya know that?” He pulls away from the hug and looks into your eyes. You hold back your tears, nodding repeatedly, letting yourself and him that it’s going to be alright.
Moments later, when reality sets in for the two of you, Glenn breaks the silence. “Should I ask Maggie to go on the run?!” He yells. “It’s fine, I’ll go now!” You reply. Daryl shakes his head, “Wait, you should stop going on runs now.” He says. “I can go on runs for a bit longer, besides, I wanna get out of here, I’ve been skipping runs for way too long.” You roll your eyes. “Okay, but I’m still coming with you.” Your boyfriend stands up, offering you a hand to help you up.
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tatsugiriroll · 1 month ago
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I was tagged by @huntresswarlock for a meme that’s short enough to do on my phone 🙌
Rules: In a new post, list the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it! And then tag as many people as you have WIPs.
When The Black Birds Come A-Screamin’
UNCLE SHAGGY
Sister Skin
Wild About Harry
For Want of a Cigarette
I’m gonna tag uhhhh @elysiangroom @crispycreambacon @zetastat @pokemonmansion because I Know all of them do Some kind of original writing but Im not sure if any other mutuals do. if u do go ahead. thanks
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grabby-smitten · 3 months ago
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I understand how uncomfortable part of the fandom feels with the new trailer. It’s the same feeling I get when I see domestic life w kids posts.
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dagaan · 8 months ago
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Inkubus
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incorrect-fnaf-quotes · 6 months ago
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Hidden Fangs Vamptrap just starts leaving a bunch during the night—because he still needs to get blood.
He’s not taken Y/N’s blood, or anyone with Y/N—yet—because Vamptrap worries about waking any of them up, and his identity being known.
Nobody really knows where he goes—he manages to slip out so fast.
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skyward-floored · 5 months ago
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Okay, I'm going crazy trying to find one of your fics I want to reread. I could've sworn it was in one of your whumptober collections, but I haven't found it yet. It's with your coa boys, Wind and Kal I think? They're hiding from a lynel that hit Kal with an ice arrow (prompt was can't scream, i think). I love how you describe Kal's reaction to the ice spreading and I need to reread it again to scratch that itch 🙃
Ah that’s febuwhump actually, from two years ago! That’s when I did my links for some of the prompts :)
The Links in it are actually Windy and Light, which is the other four swords Link so it’s understandable you’d mix them up. I’ll have to go looking for it, but I can find it for you if you like!
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dashiellqvverty · 8 months ago
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love to check the ao3 for something on a whim and find out that plenty of other people ARE wearing the same goggles as me. anyway.
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🫡🫡🫡
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deus-ex-mona · 2 years ago
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we are united in a common cause on this ✨#blessed✨ day
#hi bots why do you keep liking my lxl posts lmaooooo they aren’t even good mans#n o t that any of my posts are even good to begin with but… my lxl posts are the worst of the worst o k#i mean. they’re p much bot bait at this point.. well! at least the bots like ‘em fruity too~~~~~#though. speaking of this hellsite.. does anyone else get annoyed when the dumb app makes you follow people you’ve never heard of?#like i can never tell if someone i’m following has changed their url or if they’re someone the ‘site possessed my account to follow#like… well… backstory time: i originally made this account to browse the ship tags for a c e r t a i n ship from a c e r t a i n fandom#back when the year was still somewhere in the 2010s i think.. then i lost interest in the ship and the fandom (rip 狛 x 日 y’all the ogs)#and then i deleted the app without having ever followed any accounts. but when i next logged in a few years later. m a n.#i was following some account that i’d never even heard of lmao. like whoaaaaa who you#the account seemed to have been abandoned though.. but they made some really pretty non-fandom art i think…#idk i just thought about it bc i keep seeing accounts i don’t recognise on my dash and i m just like w h o y o u 👁️🫦👁️#i feel kinda bad when i see posts from the accounts that use this site like an actual blog y’know..#like there you are; using the site like it was probably meant to be used.#while im just here making shitposts and the occasional tl for a small-ish fandom#hm. i think i could make t h e most boring blog ever if i ever tried to be a blogger lmao#like i once made a w o r d p r e s s jokeblog that had nothing but a post about kale chips on it… i think#i wonder if that site is still up though… can’t rem if i deleted it or something… o h w e l l#o h c o w. what point was i trying to make again? i forgor—#though. speaking of cows. ‘cow’ (in a c e r t a i n c h i n e s e d i a l e c t) was allegedly my brother’s first word as a kid#and yeah. it was directed at yours truly. (sadge) to think that my bro learned how to talk just to insult me..#brothers amirite? (truly sadge……..)#it is suiyoubi my dudes
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divnydoodles · 2 years ago
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The results from this poll came in! Thank y’all so much for your feedback; I’ll definitely take this new knowledge into consideration!!💕
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rustybutterknife · 10 months ago
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Was told that this post got to r/SystemsCringe and I just wanna say as a medically recognized DID system:
L + ratio + no bitches + my ass jiggles when I walk
Microdosing polyamory by dating a system
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flippedorbit · 1 month ago
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attempting to make something without a pattern
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fierykitten2 · 3 months ago
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I love how the combination of Wake and Leaves not being in any of Perrin’s photos of their trio members and the two of them being not only exclusively found outside Area Zero but also being event-exclusive kinda implies (to me at least) that the two of them escaped and decided to explore. I was having this conversation with myself while having my breakfast this morning (it’s 2 minutes past noon as I’m writing this so I’m sure I finished breakfast in the morning) and I was thinking that the two of them (as a result of being event-exclusive) have probably spent a lot of time outside Paldea but at the very least Wake (assuming it travels without Leaves, which is pretty likely given they’re version-exclusive) probably hasn’t got much further than somewhere in Kalos (not really sure how to fit this into the conversation but now feels like I good time to mention that even with the argument that there’s land between Kalos and Paldea the Teraleak showed that was meant to be in X and Y so I’m counting it as Kalos for the time being). I don’t see either of them scaling that cliff (despite Wake’s strong legs) but Wake can walk on water while Leaves is part Psychic and can probably Teleport (turns out I don’t take into account the ability to learn the move Teleport when I think about Psychic-types being able to teleport. As far as I’m concerned, they just have to be part Psychic to be able to teleport. Might explain why Jirachi and two of the Lake Guardians can use it illegally in the anime) and that thought made me realise it’s sad there’s no chance of them appearing in Z-A. What I think should happen in place of that is there should be an NPC in Z-A who mentions sightings of an unidentifiable (I mean they’re technically not in the Kalos Dex) Pokémon resembling a feminine-presenting Legendary from a far away region in either Southern Kalos or one of the seaside cities (I was thinking Shalour City because it was the first one that came to mind. I’d like to think that Wake followed the water and ended up there. Leaves probably felt like playing with its type advantage to Fighting or something). I mean the location they are rumoured to have been sighted in could vary per day and maybe sometimes they’re not mentioned to have been sighted at all (the implication there being they’ve gone back to Paldea for their event raids although this doesn’t have to coincide with a rerun of their event in SV. Would admittedly be pretty cool if it did though). I’m also thinking that because they’re version-exclusive it would make sense that only one of them has been sighted in Kalos. I’m thinking (because presumably there’ll be a “choose your version, X or Y” situation like how PLA makes you choose between the clans or something) that the NPC (or NPCs, maybe they’re spreading a whole rumour about it rather than just one person being like “I think I saw not-Suicune/not-Virizion in [insert location here]) could start off being ambiguous and describe stuff that applies to both Paradox Pokémon at first but then go into more detail after you’ve chosen a version to be loyal to (I guess colour-coordinating their original versions would mean if you choose X you get Leaves being described and if you choose Y you get Wake being described but I like the idea of doing it the other way round. Mainly because I prefer Leaves and Y but if you’re just looking at the Pokémon and not which versions they represent then Wake makes more sense with the blue X choice and Leaves makes more sense with the red Y choice plus Wake and X tend to get listed first while Leaves and Y tend to get listed second. Wake is my second-favourite Pokémon so it’s admittedly no big loss if I chose the Y option only to discover the mystery (Paradox) Pokémon was a big fluffy Walking Wake the entire time but I think I’d still prefer for Y’s Paradox Pokémon being Leaves)
It won’t happen but I can dream
#walking wake#iron leaves#pokémon legends z-a#there’s an illegal combination of tags but I just can’t let my top 2 favourite Pokémon go and I am now excited for Z-A#and I mean the idea of them getting lost in Kalos because they wanted to explore is adorable#additional ideas:#it could be determined by save data. I however have both versions so idk what they would do#I guess probably have a girl who knows about Wake’s sightings and a boy who knows about Leaves’s sightings#I think I prefer the ambiguous until you choose your canon version option personally#even if we say X Wake Y Leaves I reckon Leaves has befriended a Xerneas#also X Wake Y Leaves is kinda funny#because Xerneas is a Fairy-type (immune to Wake’s Dragon-type) and Yveltal is part Dark (immune to Leaves’s Psychic-type)#they’ve got the automatic dominance there I would’ve loved Terapagos to have (even though Fairy/Dark doesn’t make sense for Terapagos)#technically Teraform Zero gives him “automatic dominance” over them anyway just not in the way I wanted him to have#also maybe the NPC(s) has/have tried to come up with their own code names for Wake and Leaves due to not knowing their official names#maybe they even went for more standard names (I still love TV Tropes’s suggestion of Suishodai and Viridiode)#bonus points if they start speculating about the rest of their trio members#although any suggested names might not be as fitting given they haven’t seen those four yet#TV Tropes’s choices for those four aren’t as interesting and if the other five alliterate with their modern-day counterparts#I think Boulder’s speculative name should start with Terra#also keeping the S and V alliteration by giving Wake and Leaves new names based on Suicune and Virizion would be a cool detail#I’m fine with them keeping their official names#pokémon
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aelyosos · 5 months ago
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proud of you
thank you so much, anon ! 🥺💛
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incorrect-fnaf-quotes · 6 months ago
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Vamptrap AU 2: Electric Boogaloo. Here, he ends up escaping from the village—wounded, after a couple of people there discover what he is.
He stumbles across a little group—which includes Y/N, who makes the decision to help him out.
Vamptrap chooses to keep his identity hidden—and then shenanigans involving him and Y/N start up.
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