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dreaming-hibi · 2 years ago

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The way home Huxiao week 2023 | July 9th - Reincarnation

✿ 4k+ words ✿ Tags: Reincarnation but it’s funny, angst / FULL comfort ✿ Featuring: Xiao’s comedic suffering, Hu Tao being Hu Tao

Every day was like the one before, a blend of the same three duties Xiao carried out for the sake of Liyue. That was his life, until he rescued a mysterious Mini Seelie.

“My head is not your nest.” “Squeak!” “It matters not if you like it.” "Squeak...?" "Not even if you pout."

“Yaa!”

Xiao stepped to the side with practiced agility, the hilichurl’s club making contact with the ground he previously stood on seconds later. As the monster pondered over the failures of its attack, he didn’t hesitate to drive his spear through the goblin-like creature.

He had no prayers to offer the hilichurl, as its lifeless body came to lie on the ground in a pool of its own blood. A tool for extermination had no time for remorse, nor should he be feeling any guilt towards a monster which attempted to take his life.

Tonight’s moon was particularly luminous, casting boundless shadows, which twisted, danced and covered the whole land of Liyue. The air felt as though it was at an impasse with the world, for not even a breeze could be felt.

There was something in the atmosphere, something charged with possibilities unknown. Although Xiao possessed not the gift of foresight, even he could sense tonight would be different to every other night; whether this was a good omen or not, it still remained to be seen.

“Yaaa!” cried a hilichurl, clumsily swinging its flaming club left and right. Its desperate battlecry echoed in the devastated camp, not a single warrior was left to answer its call.

Xiao brought down his spear with merciless precision, bestowing a swift and painless death upon the lone survivor. For creatures who had lost both intellect and spirituality, an act of mercy was rarely seen as a helping hand; rather, it could only be seen as a cruel continuation of one’s own suffering.

Once insanity knocked at the door, death was the only answer to give.

“They show no sign of having been touched by corruption and yet...” The rowdiness of this particular camp had little to do with the ancient corruption, of this Xiao was sure; however, what else could cause them to be so disruptive?

An unexpected rattling sound caught Xiao’s attention, breaking his conviction of having dealt with the whole of the camp’s monsters. A feeling akin to annoyance contorted his features into a scowl, pursuing a hidden enemy never brought favorable results.

“Come out.”

The sound ceased for the duration of a heartbeat before picking up once again, more desperate than when it first appeared. Not an enemy, perhaps these hilichurls had only recently caught a prey and they saw his sudden appearance in their camp as a hindrance; animals—as well as humans—tended to become rather aggressive when someone stood between them and their hard-earned dinner.

Xiao took his time in finding the source of the sound, after all, for all he knew, it could still be an enemy, waiting for the opportune time to strike at him. Returning injured to the inn was not an option.

“What is this?”

A wooden chest stood by itself at the center of the biggest hut in the camp. The noise that had taken him this far into the camp was, unmistakably, coming from it. As Xiao stood before it, he couldn’t help but feel wary by the chest’s existence — hilichurls were not known for keeping their prey in chests.

Firmly holding his spear in one hand, Xiao opened the chest. Although faced with the unknown, his heart was strangely at peace for once, as though his earlier cautiousness was a residual effect of being at constant war with the world. He was no stranger to this feeling of serenity—for a certain vivacious soul had taught him to appreciate its flavor—however it had been many years since he had last tasted it and he couldn’t fathom how it could be surfacing now, while opening this box full of possibilities.

I understand now, this chest is the reason…

That which was meant to occur tonight, the reason for the restlessness of the earth and the quietness of the wind, was occurring at this particular juncture in time, between the unknown and the known of the contents of the chest.

“Kyuu!”

Xiao went momentarily blind as his vision was obscured by something jumping out of the chest and attacking his face with unprecedented speed, not even his time-honed reflexes could protect him from his assailant.

When he grabbed onto the impertinent and fearless enemy to pry it away from his face, his hand touched something squashy and warm, a feeling like what he would imagine touching pyro slimes barehanded would feel like.

The impertinent being came off without much resistance, rather, it squealed excitedly as though there could be nothing more amusing in the world.

“Silence,” Xiao ordered, inspecting the insolent blob. It quieted down with a hiccup, its form stilling as though conscious of what was being expected of it. Although more than a bit miffed by its peculiar behavior, Xiao examined the creature carefully.

The little blob was as big as Xiao’s palm and as round as the moon, with what appeared to be ears or horns protruding from its body — which only consisted of a see-through head and one luminous eye. Its appearance reminded Xiao of the infant Seelie he once saw floating beside the Traveler. If he remembered correctly the Traveler referred to it as a “mini Seelie”, a being with no particular abilities of its own.

A part of him wondered what those hilichurls could possibly gain from eating this tiny blob—there were more nutritious meals out there—while another part, not as insignificant as he would like, became lost in reminiscences of the years gone. To begin with, Xiao wasn’t one who took the time to dwell in happenings of the past, as he would inevitably long for a life he could no longer live; however, there were times in which even someone like him could become prey to the sweet whisperings of memories.

The Traveler he knew, a courageous soul with more bravery than there were stars in the sky, had long since met with their sibling and taken off to some distant galaxy. He couldn’t fault them for making such a choice, rather he would paint himself a hypocrite if he made such an accusation — he chose love over solitude himself.

As though making up its own mind of ending this inspection, the blob once again attacked Xiao’s face, squeaking up a storm.

Xiao growled in displeasure, the little one possessed strength far greater than its size and he wasn’t about to be pushed back by its insistent pounding. He wasn’t an unmovable mountain, but he was also no pushover, no matter how much he allowed others to continue commenting on his lack of height.

“Cease this attack at once.”

The little blob screeched—it sounded angry enough to be called thus—before attacking his face once more. Xiao was no blob-whisperer, he couldn’t understand the first thing about this little one but something told him the rascal wasn’t happy with his interpretation of its exuberant gesture.

“Is this… not an attack?”

It gave a clockwise twirl before squeaking something cheerful and affirmative and, again, went back to “attacking” his face. Too curious to resist, Xiao set back and observed the blob, perhaps there was more to this particular action than met the eye.

Now that he paid close attention, Xiao could see the motion for what it was: the little one was rubbing their faces together, with far too much enthusiasm than the action warranted for but, it was a harmless rub nonetheless. And, Xiao snorted at his own insensibility, every now and then the blob made small squeaky noises, like those made by overly cheerful kids when they were kissing their mother’s cheeks.

“Are you thanking me?”

It gave a twirl and a squeak, an answer which he now knew to be the blob’s way of saying: “Yes!”

Xiao nodded at the response, too amused to do anything else. He picked up his spear and stood up, however enjoyable his time with the blob was, all meetings in this world were bound to end in departure. Furthermore, he had his duty to go back to.

“You are free,” he said to the little one, knowing full well it was capable of understanding him — although he ignored the how's and the why’s. Xiao watched as its single radiant eye narrowed, as though the blob knew how to glare, before it twirled its body counterclockwise, screeching as it went. He took it for the “NO!” it stood for.

As much as he was beginning to think this little red blob couldn’t possibly be the bad omen his sixth sense had warned him about, its current stubborn behavior was quickly making him change his mind.

“Go.”

Xiao tried switching to a more stern approach, perhaps the blob mistook him for a good-hearted person. For as much as he had come to accept that he was no mere tool for massacre, his hands were irrevocably tainted with the blood of Liyue’s enemies and no amount of excuses, no matter how well thought-out, could ever change this fact.

The blob twirled again and again, vigorously affirming its negative answer at being told to go. On its final twirl, the little one unexpectedly launched itself at Xiao and nestled in his hair, squeaking and cooing as it did so.

“No,” Xiao was just as firm in his disapproval, his hands reaching for the blob to pull it free from his hair. When his hands closed in on the rascal—its squashy body reminding him how easily he could end its life—instead of resisting, the little one broke down into tiny gurgles, like peals of mischievous laughter.

His heart froze in place as he was reminded of the longing he felt for a similar, familiar sound. Xiao used to happily suffer through pranks and nonsensical jokes just to hear that beloved sound, he would forgive and forget for it.

“You may come with.”

The rascal answered with a squeal.

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Concerned over his little companion’s well-being if he teleported, Xiao had no other choice but to enter the inn through the front door, like a common man. The inn was void of its usual chatter, so he passed unnoticed by the few souls still lingering around the terrace.

“Sir Xiao!” shouted Jin’hui, her blonde hair moving every which way as she bounced behind the counter in an attempt to catch Xiao’s attention. Calling his name would have sufficed.

The genetic transmission of traits from parent to child and child to grandchild could be said to capture only the most superficial of traits since, apart from her blonde hair and her ability to keep everyone off his business, Verr Goldet’s granddaughter—Jin’hui—shared no other traits with her grandmother. The woman couldn’t seem to apply the same concept of keeping off his business to herself like she did with others.

He acknowledged her presence with a nod but, other than that, he continued on to his room as though she wasn’t in the middle of furiously beckoning him to stand at the counter and chat about his night.

“How was your night?” Xiao should have known better, nothing could stop this woman from putting her nose where it wasn’t needed. “Oh my, oh my! That’s a very cute hat!”

Xiao halted in his steps as the little blob in his head gave a satisfied squeak, as if to answer the flattering comment it was given. He grabbed onto its squashy body and gave it a good shake, waking it up from its blissful nap. “It is not a hat,” he said, more to the little one than to Jin’hui.

“Then, it’s a little bird and your hair is its nest.”

The little one broke free from his hold and squealed uncomfortably loud.

“No,” Xiao repeated, firmly grabbing onto the blob with both hands. He would not be walking around with a blob on his head, the fierce image that commanded respect as Conqueror of Demons would be no more. “My hair shall not be your nest.”

The rascal hiccupped in protest.

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As hesitant as Xiao was to welcome the little rascal into his life—for all meetings must come to an end, and such was the inevitable fate of all those who chose to tread the path of life beside a yaksha—the transition between no-blob-life to blob-on-board-life was flawless and effortless. The little one behaved as though it belonged in his life, as though it was meant to be in his life.

“It’s time to get going.”

Xiao was ready to start his day even before the sun rays had time to touch the tops of the mountains, while his days ended once the moon was gone. Few were the people who could keep with such a tight schedule, however, his little rascal was energetic from sunrise to sunrise.

The little one squealed and twirled, safely nestling itself on Xiao’s head.

“My head is not your nest.”

“Squeak!”

“It matters not if you like it.”

Although Xiao couldn’t see its reaction, he could feel as the little one rolled uncontrollably on his head, pulling at his hair to hide itself, whining with tiny squeaks as it did so. If Xiao were to name this particular behavior, he would be calling it “pouting”.

The blob was pouting and his heart felt heavy at the thought of having been the one to cause such a reaction.

“You may continue,” he said, a stern tone roughing his voice. “However, tomorrow this shall be no more.”

Both knew those were just empty words, as they would be having this same discussion tomorrow, and tomorrow’s tomorrow, and every day after that. Xiao was incapable of standing his ground with the little one, and the little one was content to use this weakness at every turn.

“Squeal!”

“No, you are not cute.”

❀❁❀⋆❀❁❀⋆❀❁❀⋆❀❁❀

“Mmm,” mumbled Baoyan as he hurriedly placed the almond tofu on the table and disappeared into the kitchen once again. His fearful appearance had little to do with Xiao himself, and more to do with the poor name his mother had given him. True to his name, he was a person of thin words.

Xiao spared the poor soul the polite words he had come to give on certain occasions, for he sympathized with the inability to keep up with idle chat. He had discovered how to best show his appreciation for the service he was given, and that was by polishing off what he was served, although, today he wasn’t in the mood for eating.

The little rascal, whose preferred position during meals was on the table, rolled around the plate of almond tofu at an alarming speed. Had the little one possessed the gift of a mouth, Xiao would have been more than happy to give up his meal to it.

“Stop it.”

It squeaked back at him with indignation and far too much temper for a thing that was only head and ears — or horns, Xiao had yet to expose the true identity of the protrusions the little one had.

“I am not hungry.”

Xiao sighed as the little one began to make a loud shrilling sound, a heartfelt cry that broke his own in half. As concerning as it might sound, this was a behavior Xiao had come to expect whenever he refused to eat his meals. For one so small, his little one carried a boundlessly kind heart.

“Sorry,” he whispered, gathering the sobbing blob into his hands. Its light dimmed and brightened with its hiccups, creating quite an amusing lights show for Xiao. “I will try to do better.”

His little one gave a quiet squeal before it flew atop his head, nuzzling itself there and promptly falling asleep as though Xiao had sworn to eat the whole dish. In spite of the fact that he couldn’t recall having made such a promise when he spoke, Xiao picked up his spoon.

“You are too much like her…” he grumbled as he brought the first spoonful to his mouth. Baoyan’s almond tofu bore the same taste of sweet dreams as Yanxiao’s; however, there were times in which Xiao couldn’t bring himself to enjoy this particular taste on his tongue.

Today was such a day, a day in which he was reminded of her, Hu Tao.

It wasn’t so much the dish as it was the memory of her that choked him up with such force he saw his karmic debt as being a lesser demon. The very first and the very last dish he received from Hu Tao was almond tofu, it was a sweet torture to his senses when he had to eat this dish while thinking of someone who was no longer with him. She had chosen to dedicate her human life to him and yet, he had greedily begged her for more time. He had tarnished their last memory together, thrown the life they had lived together into question, committed the one sin he could never recover from.

And now, his little one’s giggles of joy and squeaks of disapproval were constantly reminding him of her. Even the way it manipulated him into doing its every command was the same, and what was he to do when he loathed and loved that resemblance?

“Perhaps, eating will ease my heart.”

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Wangshu Inn provided two different bathhouses for their guests, one for male guests and one for female guests. Located adjacent to each other, both bathhouses boasted a breathtaking view of Jueyun Karst.

“Sir Xiao!” called Jin’hui, waving an enthusiastic hand in his direction. Xiao didn’t bother to wave back, however he did stop to acknowledge her greeting. “The bathhouse is empty at the moment!”

Xiao nodded, turning in the direction of the bathhouse. Millenia of massacre had taught him how to keep from spilling blood on himself, however, one little blob didn’t have the same amount of experience nor care to keep itself clean.

The rascal struggled in his hands, fruitlessly squealing in an attempt to break free. Xiao tightened his hold, refusing to have one little blob continue muddying his hair and garments.

“You are dirty.”

“Squeak?!”

“Do not feign ignorance.”

It came as easy as breathing for the little rascal to manipulate Xiao into doing whatever it wanted—to the point where he was foolishly willing to forgive anything—however, this was one thing Xiao refused to compromise on. No amount of struggling and crying would make him yield.

“Squeal…” resigned to its fate, the little one stilled in his hands. It gave some occasional squeaks and squeals as he readied a wooden bucket with warm water and soap.

Xiao took off his gloves before he carefully lowered the little one into its personal bathtub. Unlike what he expected, the little one floated peacefully on the surface of the water and even underwent some scrubbing with minimal complaint.

“How well-behaved of you,” he said, jokingly knocking his knuckles against the rascal until it rolled over in the water a couple of times. It squeaked in response. “It was a compliment.”

It was once he had successfully solved the issue of his little dirty blob that Xiao noticed how filthy he himself was. His head had officially become a bird’s nest, with twigs and mud sticking out at odd angles. His white shirt was a disconcerting gray color, while his previously purple pants were now a sad black.

“You rascal.”

“Squeal!”

Xiao shook his head at the overly cheerful squeal he received, the rascal felt not one drop of remorse for what it did. It wasn’t rare for him to take baths, after all, cleansing both body and soul was a necessity in keeping his karma under control, however...

“Squeal~!”

At the mere hint of him taking his clothes off, the little rascal would go wild with squeals and twirls of delight, its phosphorescent light brightening to an almost uncomfortable degree. If he didn’t know any better, Xiao would think the little one was actually enjoying the situation — which was exactly what it was doing, and which was the reason why he never brought it to the bathhouse with him.

“You are one indecent little blob,” he commented, more to himself than to anything else; the blob was too lost in its own unrestrained squeals to pay attention to him. Taking this as the opportune time to carry on with his mission, Xiao swiftly rid himself of his clothes.

When the high-pitched squealing quieted down at last, Xiao was already clean of any muddy remnants and peacefully resting—accompanied by a bucket-full of water and blob—in the thermal waters of the outdoor bath.

“Squeak?!” the rascal twirled counterclockwise within the confines of the bucket, fuming and squeaking as it went. It clearly wasn’t pleased with the current situation, not that Xiao cared for its approval at this moment in time.

Xiao sighed, far too amused to sound appropriately tired as he wanted, “Indecent blob.”

“Squeak!”

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Moonless nights were synonymous with increased monster activity, such nights were also synonymous with exhaustion for Xiao. More often than not his duty, although repetitive, would leave him with ample energy to savor a meal and keep watch over Liyue for the remaining time until the sun came out. This didn’t apply to nights like today.

Xiao struggled to keep himself upright as he made his way up the steps to his room. His bone-deep fatigue made a poor companion for the squealing blob on his head, who couldn’t keep itself out of trouble and yet insisted on following him into danger, adding more worries to his already strained mind.

For as much as he denied the notion that adepti slept like humans, his room was decorated with a spacious bed fit for two grown adults — something which he hadn’t initially approved of, but eventually conceded in favor of not discussing the issue again. It was on this very bed where he let his body fall at last.

His bubbly companion squeaked at the rough treatment, unkindly attaching itself to his head and pulling at his hair. Xiao supposed it was only fair considering he had almost squashed the blob when he laid down.

“I hadn’t meant to…” Squash you to death? Xiao wasn’t sure he could make himself utter such insensitive words. He was guilty of forgetting the blob on his head, but he had been so tired, he just couldn’t remember any good reason for why he couldn’t drop dead on the bed.

“Squeak!”

The little rascal gave a series of frustrated squeaks, much like how a mother would scold a child, before it settled against Xiao’s neck and began to purr — yes, like a cat. Disoriented by this sudden gesture, all Xiao could do was lay with his head at an uncomfortable angle and brave through his little one vibrating at maximum strength.

Its quivering, reminiscent of the great shows of power Rex Lapis carried out in the Archon War, had a strange somniferous effect on him. His eyes struggled to remain open, he may be exhausted but Xiao refused to surrender to the great call of nightmares.

“Little one—” he began but held his tongue as an annoyingly familiar and beloved song resounded within the room, awakening emotions he had come to accept as gone.

♪Silly-churl, billy-churl, silly-billy hilichurl

Frilly-churl, willy-churl, frilly-willy hilichurl♪

“Hu... Tao?”

The little rascal squealed, its fiery red glow brightening the room much like the rays of the sun brightened the day. It twirled once, twice before it brushed part of itself on his lips, something like a silly kiss he had come to never expect again in this life.

“Of all things...”

Xiao snorted, happiness and confusion and shock, and many things all at once exploding inside his heart. The emotions of an entire lifetime threatened to spill over, to break free from inside him and taint the world with the colors of his love. Tears came unbidden �� tears he had sworn he could no longer cry, as his body had been hollowed out to the point of insensibility, both by the karma he carried and the immeasurable misery and guilt he had felt at the passing of Hu Tao.

“I’m sorry…” he murmured, salty liquid spilling onto the Seelie as he gathered her into his hands and wept. Even though Hu Tao had been the one to teach him the importance of crying, as it cleansed the soul of sadness and gave the person an opportunity to express the suffering and pain they had been through, her death had robbed him of his tears.

She giggled, perhaps amused by his foolish thoughts and beliefs. As always, he couldn’t fault her for finding enjoyment in the situation, he had been foolish enough to condemn himself for something he had no control over: his heart. Even yaksha weren’t exempt from matters of the heart and, as much as they boasted a desire-free life, certain wants from heart were inevitable.

“I love you, still.”

Hu Tao squealed, glowing closer to pink than her usual red. To think she would be embarrassed by such words, Xiao was reassured by this innocent gesture of hers. She had returned to him, in an unexpected form but she had returned, when he had been certain she wouldn’t and he wasn’t foolish enough to turn his back on such a blessing.

“However, you are still not allowed to enter the bath with me.”

“Squeak!”

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