#would you like to do that sort of scenario with me Alex?

[kim-tey]

let’s learn about swinging [x]

[aethelwyneleigh27]

Some Dad!Cod Character Scenario and Appreciation Post

Characters In Mind: Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra, Alex Keller, König, Keegan P. Russ, Gary "Roach" Sanderson.

The original creator of the picture, they also have so many works that are used in so many fanfics as well so please credit her. I found her account here on Tumblr (@ave661) and here is the post.

AFAB!Reader and used pronouns are "you"

Apologies if this is a bit too short but;

ꕥ HOPE YOU ENJOY! ꕥ

A/n: I've had a good but also bad week (good thanks to @puff0o0 and other extremely sweet mutuals), it's neutral, I'm not here to rant of any sort but my personal life has not been good. I understand that not everyone will like me but it feels as though everyone hates me, most of those people happen to be at school. Sure I'm not really going to do anything about it because I prefer avoiding conflict but those same people are trying to flip the story around as if I'm the one who hates them when in reality I don't and by being mean to me they're giving me a reason to dislike them. Sure I'm average academically, sometimes I have difficulty pulling my weight in group works and I'm not outstanding in reportings but we all have our difficulties. I just don't understand people who love to hate on others because they have nothing better to do.

This is a word of advice to everyone, don't let others let you feel insignificant, you aren't and you have many talents that make you different from them. (I don't really practice what I preach because I love self-deprication, however I don't want people to feel the way I do because I know what it can cause)

Disclaimers/warnings: OOC??, Pregnancy, Implied birth, Children (Pretty sure that was obvious from the title), People who don't want/hate children be warned.

Short note: This is also a dedication to all the Mistki and Hozier fans out there <3

He was so used to the smell of hospitals, the smell of medication, it always indicated death for him but this was a whole new feeling. It was the opposite of what he has seen most of his life

So much so that he refused to hold them, afraid of potentially hurting the fragile little one. He looked at you as if you were crazy when you tried to hand him the baby, "Come on now love, you can't just avoid holding them forever" you said to him as of it was a life or death situation.

Hesitantly letting you guide him through the proper way to hold them, he felt his breath hitch at the sound of cooing. The first time the baby opened it's eyes, the first thing they saw being their dad.

The moment he looked at the baby sealed it, he was going to protect them their whole life, he would go as far as feeling all the guilt of having blood on their hands again if it meant your baby would be protected and cared for.

The baby was so small that it's little head was practically the size of his palm, he didn't know initially what to do when the baby cried and shocked himself when he managed to make them stop.

Once the baby was old enough to crawl, he'd let the baby crawl all over him. The little one babbling non-sense while he just chuckled and replied as if he understood what the baby was saying. Gods be damned if he misses an important milestone such as their first word or their first time walking.

You'd often wake up to seeing him shirtless snoozing on the couch, the tv playing only ads for home appliances late at night while the baby only in a diaper having skin to skin contact with their dad, his huge hand big enough to support the little one from falling.

He almost cried the first time your baby reached for his face an touched it, resting it's tiny little fingers on his cheek, giving him a gummy smile. His little one unaware that they just healed something they never broke.

He NEVER wants to ever see your little one grow up, though sure it makes more memories with them, sometimes they just wish time stops for a second so they can enjoy the moment longer.

Initially was terrified that he'd pass his trauma down but he realized that wouldn't be possible and he will NOT ever let them go through what he did.

Eventually chose to resign from his work because the risk was far too much, what if he died? He'd leave you and your child to grieve over him? He won't be there for them growing up and he'd miss everything.

Sure he's worked most his life to get where he is now but nothing is ever worth more than spending a lifetime with you and your child together. He's been lonely almost all his life until he met you.

You are his family, his everything. He promised that whatever happens, he'll crawl home to you...

[hoshizoralone]

a post where i separate every woman in smash by how i would categorize them in relation to samus if she had a dating sim and they had to be assigned a character type (that im saving here in case i ever want to go back to think about this) . and other samus & smash girls shipping thoughts

firstly i originally posted this on bluesky so if you’re not following me there.. go do that!! @hoshizoralone.bsky.social

explanations for the tropes are as follows:

childhood friend - palutena (kid icarus and metroid game overlaps of which there are many. like come on man... this is a nobrainer)

energetic cute girls - peach/daisy/pyra (daisy is jock leaning)

jocks - wii fit trainer/alex/mythra

mysterious transfer student - sheik/mii gunner/rosalina/lucina (though samus is not in school. but i'm not sure how else to explain this trope. maybe just "mysterious character")

the love interest that openly flirts with the mc - bayonetta

(varying degrees of) nerds, the smart girls - byleth/robin/zelda/isabelle (like lets say they were put into a scenario with samus. they would be the brains of the operation. robin would have had the adam stuff in dread solved immediately)

i don't care - corrin (i really tried to think of what trope she could be but i don't even imagine samus would like her)

not viable (teenagers). these two become a background couple - min-min/leaf (well, i had thought this, but after making the post on bluesky someone told me leaf’s canon age is 11. i had thought she was nebulously teenaged…. so either age her up here, or forget this tier exists)

not viable (babies) - villagers/inklings/wendy/nana

i do think the idea of creating a sim revolving around samus would be fun, only issue is the pression has truly kicked my ass this year and i really am all out of writing ability. i have two other games already sitting in my drafts half finished…

it could make for a fun rom hack though. Maybe instead of the chozo giving you power ups its the other girls . And at the end you have to Save The Girls not the animals. Someone make that happen.

~~~~

the above isnt arranged by how much i ship it but the below is. imagine gandrayda (of metroid prime 3 fame) right under samus and then a massive powergap and then the rest of the chart:

two professional girlfailures are facing off head to head in this 500 chapter slow burn sam/palu fanfiction - palutena (palutena is a girlfailure at everything but samus only falls into that category for women. it would be an extremely long time for samus to realize palutena likes her . could they make it work when they're both so busy? read my nonexistent fic to find out)

samus has a one sided crush - peach/rosalina/wii fit trainer. (samus will never confess. peach has mario and samus isnt messing w that. samus thinks she's not cool enough for rosalina. wft is already in a relationship consult the lone wii fit trainer lore)

(in my head samus’s one sided crushes are justified like this:

peach - she is literally so pretty it’s blinding. peak femininity is making samus short circuit

rosalina - parentless lady from space who has been left alone/feels lonely resonates hard

wft - she gives constant positive feedback which i think samus is starved to hear)

i used to love sam/bayo but bayo3 sucked so i kinda dont care about it anymore - bayonetta. sad day.

one sided crush on samus - alex/robin/zelda/lucina

samus-neutral - sheik/byleth/isabelle/gunner/pymythra/daisy/corrin. (they probably wouldnt pass up the opportunity to kiss samus if given one but they're not having their thoughts occupied by her)

one sided childhood crush (thinks she's cool) (not reciprocated) - min-min (samus is sort of like a celebrity. it's sort of like having a crush on zac efron when hes 18 and youre 7)

i consider samus in her 30s so every teenager and baby who doesn't have a cute unreciprocated crush is out of the running - leaf/villagers/inklings/nana/wendy

someone had asked… where’s dark samus. for me as one of the five samus x gandrayda shippers, i think if there was a dating sim and dark samus was in it samus would immediately halt the events of the dating sim to go hunt her down as repayment for everything + the whole killing her girlfriend thing. like she cant exist in this world.

the only other samus thing i ship that isn’t mentioned here already is samus x cortana. it could be cute. i do Naut ship her with any guys. lesbian samus for life

aside from samus x gandrayda which will probably always be my ride or die ship, i think the ship with the most interesting stuff to explore is samus/palutena… they aren’t alike characterwise at all, but it’s just that their series are linked in a metatextual sense, so its fun to imagine them together. in a “we’ve been hanging around each other for a while!” kind of way. well, opposites attract..

anyways that was my post. If you read this and have thoughts let me know. Maybe i’ll draw some stuff in my freetime. Cool thanks love ya bye.

[witchygagirlwrites]

That Damn Chain

Jay Halstead x Reader

In which you blurt out things in the heat of the moment and reveal some things about yourself and feelings you'd buried for one of your partners

NSFW happenings

How was it that you and Jay had yet again drawn the short straw to go undercover? You loved your partner but you were so damn tired of playing arm candy. The last three undercover ops you'd been dolled out and while normally you would've loved the occasion pampering the fact remained you hated not being able to have a weapon of any sorts on you. That left not only yourself unguarded but Jay's back as well should something go south.

You knew without a shadow of a doubt he’d protect you with his life, same as you him but if something happened where you walked away and he didn’t because he was protecting you? You weren’t sure of a scenario that would end well. No matter how hard you tried to deny it to yourself your partner had won your heart quite a while ago. You’d never admit it under threat of torture. Too much bad waters for him when it came to partners and too much to lose for you when he undoubtedly didn’t feel the same.

“Kim!” you flinched when she poked your eye with the eyeliner and she grimaced “I’m sorry honey!” Voight had lent you his office to get ready considering it had an actual locking door but it also didn’t have a mirror so you had to rely on her help with makeup and hair. You let a small smile slip onto your face “Didn’t hurt as bad as Adam getting the wire tangled in my hair the last time” she cracked a grin at the memory of you chasing him through the tech room and threatening to wax his beard off.

You and Jay were due at the club around ten to meet with Alex Henderson. A tycoon's son with too much money and not enough morals. He’d gotten bored partying it up with small-time drugs and hookers and moved onto trafficking heroin, fentanyl and as of late people. You just needed to get him on tape making a sale and you’d have him for it all. Jay was set up through a C.I, to meet with Alex. Poe was a former friend of Alex’s and when he’d gotten rolled up for suspicion in his girlfriend’s death when she overdosed he’d cut a deal to avoid the death sentence.

“There, you’re ready” she replied after a moment and you smiled. Your breasts felt like they were directly under your chin with how high the combination of a push up bra and corseted top accented them. The skirt you wore barely skimmed your thighs and as for the boots, you’d arrested actual hookers wearing more. “Do I at least get a jacket?” you groaned and she held up the long coat. At least it looked warm “It’s lined” she added as if she was reading your face so you smiled “You’re an angel Kim”

About that time there was a knock on the door followed by Voight asking if you were ready. You cut your eyes at Kim and took a deep breath before walking out. Hailey let out a low whistle “Damn Y/N” you winked at her “From you? I’ll take the catcall”

Adam looked at Kim with wide eyes “Those are a bit…much”  Kevin and Jay walked around the corner and both stopped dead in their tracks. “Jesus” Jay muttered under his breath and Kevin grinned before slapping his shoulder “C’mon Jay. That’s your partner man. Am I the only professional around here?” 

You were too busy practically drooling over what Jay was wearing. He was wearing a suit, tailored to hug his shoulders and the gold chain Will had given him for his last birthday peeking out the collar. After the last time he got shot he swore it was a good luck charm and wore it however often he could. That damn chain was a hazard to your health. The thoughts it caused to pop into your head were never rated to be having about a coworker. 

You plastered a smile on “Kim wired me up. If everyone is through admiring my cleavage can we please get this show on the road?” Voight chuckled “You heard the woman, lets get it done”

You walked into the club next to Jay. He had one arm tucked around your waist, fingers rubbing small circles onto your hip. You noticed he did that anytime you were supposed to be his girl undercover and it made you wonder if that was something he actually did or if it was just a thing to keep him in the mindset of the moment.

You covered his hand with yours and squeezed gently. “You ok Johnny?" you cut your eyes up at him and he smiled “Yeah baby, I’m good” your heart flipped anytime he had to call you baby or sweetheart or darling on these things. You knew they didn’t mean anything more than your false name at the moment.

—---------

Alex stood outside the V.I.P. section with two thick necked guards “Mr Reynolds!” Jay laughed “Man, call me Johnny. Only my old man goes by Mr Reynolds” the two shook then Alex looked at you “And the lovely Gwen is with you I see” Jay pulled you into his side “Always”

Alex motioned behind him “Let’s grab a drink and talk”. You felt Jay’s hand slip into yours as the two of you followed him and the guards. 

When you got to a booth Alex purposely sat where you’d have no choice but to sit next to him. Jay met your eyes before reaching a hand out, you took it and he pulled you down into his lap “Always been your favorite seat, right baby?” you smiled “Always Johnny" he looked over at Alex “Now, lets talk”

The teams’ voices through the com in your ear was your only grounding factor against the fire raging in your core every time Jay slightly shifted his leg. Did he fucking realize what he was doing?  His hand slipped down to gently squeeze your ass all the while never missing a beat at backing Alex into the corner all of you needed him in. You bit down hard enough on your bottom lip that you tasted blood to be able to focus.

You knew the moment the sale was made the unit would come in along with the uniforms waiting around the block to not only clear the club of civilians but to make sure none of Alex’s business partners showed up. “So what are we thinking here? Six kilos and five girls?” Alex said and you heard Voight give the order to surround the club.

—------------

Jay cut his eyes at you as he pulled you down next to him, effectively shielding your body with his. “Yeah” “That's a hefty price you sure you got it?” Alex pushed and Jay stood up, pulling you with him “Look man if you don’t want the money just say so”  “I didn’t say that. I’m just asking if you’ve got that funds for that much heroin and that many girls. It ain't cheap to bring either product in and I don’t want to lose my invested time and money and from the looks of it you put enough money into Gwen here, I mean if you wanna offer a trade” 

Alex took a step towards you and Jay stepped squarely in front of you “If you want to draw another breath you wont even finish that thought” “Point taken” Alex chuckled then looked at his guards “I gotta make some calls. Treat them well”

—-----------

When Alex left Jay eyed the guards then whispered “Go with it” he grabbed your hand and winked at the guard “We’ll be back fellas” the guards eyed the two of you so he slipped his hand down to grab your ass again and you gasped lightly then giggled to cover it up. The guards chuckled “Bathroom is down the hall” 

“What was that?” you asked and he whispered “I think we’re made. He may not be thinking cops but he knows something is up” “Do we need to come in?” Voight asked over the coms about the time the two of you made it to the bathroom. You’d just closed the door when the first bullets hit just above your head before Jay tackled you to the ground, covering your body with his.

“CHICAGO POLICE DEPARTMENT” you heard ringing out from around the club. Jay pulled his gun from his lower back and slowly crouched over you, his chain slipping free of his shirt to dangle in front of your face as he asked “Are you ok?” you weren’t sure what the hell came over you but when you looked up into those blue eyes after such a burst of adrenaline with that damn chain dangling you blurted out “I’ve had a few dreams in this position but they never started with us getting shot at”

His eyes widened before a grin slipped onto his face “Either you’re fine or delirious. We’ll figure that out later” he pulled your backup from where he’d carried it in on his left ankle and pressed it into your hand. At your questioning look he shrugged “You hate not having a weapon nearby” then pulled you to your feet so you could both go out and meet your unit.

 For the next few days you barely looked Jay in the eye, hoping like hell he had forgotten the dream comment. Maybe he’d chalk it up to weird shit people said when adrenaline hit?

You should’ve known better when Friday night found you at Mollys. You were talking to Ethan and April at the bar while Stella made your drink. The week had been a little crazy so you were happy to relax. 

You knew the presence anywhere the moment a hand slipped around your waist “Hey partner” you cut your eyes up “Hey Halstead” he nodded to April and Ethan before passing a twenty over your head to Stella to pay for your drink and his own beer. He leaned down close enough, his breath caused a shiver to run through you when he whispered “Can we talk?”

You nodded, thanking Stella for your drink and telling April you’d see her later. Jay kept his hand at your lower back as the two of you walked over to a booth in the far corner. You slid in and cut your eyes up at him “Is this you making fun of me? Because if so I swear..” he grinned “No, this is me asking about those dreams”

You raised an eyebrow and he shrugged “What was I doing?” you leaned across the table to flick that damn chain out of his shirt before saying “Well that thing was dangling in my face for an entirely different reason besides you tackling me to keep me from getting shot” he damn near choked on his beer at that.

You laughed “Jay, chill. It’s no big deal. People have weird sex dreams. Doesn’t mean anything” his eyes flicked up to yours “So you don’t have any feelings for me? Because it’s been hard as hell acting like I don’t have feelings for you” “What?” you asked, sitting your drink down on the table.

He grinned and leaned over to grab your hand “I’ve wanted you for so damn long but because of my past relationship with a partner..” you shrugged “Just because you and her didn’t work out doesn’t mean anything” he stared at you for a moment before saying “I want you so damn much but I don’t want to rush things” you smiled slightly “Well in our job we could get killed tomorrow?” 

He shook his head but that smile he gave you was nothing short of gorgeous “Are you trying to get me in bed?” you took a sip of her drink then nodded “Yeah, I am” he nodded then took a swig of his beer before standing up “Just making sure” and grabbed your hand.

“You’re sure about this?” Jay asked as the two of you stumbled into his apartment, barely breaking away from each other long enough to make it inside the door and get it closed behind you before he had you pushed back against it as his mouth worked the sensitive skin of your neck.

You gasped when he hit a particular spot, hands digging into the material of his shirt “I’m sure. Take your damn shirt off Jay” he pulled away from you and grinned “You’re always so bossy” before slipping his shirt over his head and tossing it. You pushed him back from you a little and he looked concerned until you smiled and ran your hands over his chest “Fuck Halstead” you couldn’t help but to be a little dumbfounded at having him in front of you like this. He grinned “I’m yours” and pulled you back into his arms, dropping another kiss to your lips before tugging you towards his bedroom. “I think you said something about wanting to be in a position with my chain dangling in your face?” you fucking whimpered in response and he chuckled “Oh I’m gonna have fun with you baby. You make such sweet sounds to be so mean to me at work”

He walked backwards into the room and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling you down into his lap. You straddled him and just the way he looked up at you could’ve made you come apart. His hands went to the hem of your shirt “Can I take this off?” you pulled it off yourself and tossed it across the room. He smiled “Look at you. Looks even better than that damn top was showing” his mouth lowered to your clothed chest, kissing across the soft mounds of flesh “What’s better is only I get to see you like this”

He reached behind you and slipped your bra off with ease before his hands came up to cup your breasts. “Damn” you moaned lightly at just how gentle he was being, like he was afraid you’d break.  One hand left your breast to slip around your throat, not applying pressure just controlling your attention. “If we do this baby, know it means I’m yours and you’re mine. I don’t share well” 

You nodded and he shook his head “Words baby, I need words” “I’m yours Jay” you spoke and he leaned forward, just shy of kissing you before saying “Damn right you are” he turned, flipping the two of you so your back was on the bed and he was on top of you. Your eyes flicked down to his chain and he chuckled “Does that turn you on?” you nodded and he grinned “It’s turned you on the whole time I’ve had it, hasn’t it?”

“It has” you admitted and he grinned before catching your lips in a bruising kiss. He moved from your lips, across your jaw then down your neck. The stark comparison of the warmth of his lips with the cool metal of the chain had you squirming under him. One of his hands went to your hips, pinning them.

He kissed across your chest, taking his time to mark both breasts “So everyone knows they’re his” when he got to your jeans he looked up at you and winked before slipping them off your hips. He started at your left ankle, kissing up and stopping just shy of where you needed him before giving the right leg the same treatment.

Just when you were sure you’d die from teasing he licked one long stripe through your folds and when your hips bucked up and fingers went to his hair he kissed your inner thigh and said “That’s my girl” before diving in.

—------------------

You’d had men go down on you before but Jay was an entirely different story. The way his tongue worked at your clit, fingers finding their way inside of you to move in tandem as he worked you over that edge back to back until you were pushing at his shoulders begging him “Please Jay! It’s too much”

When he pulled back to look at you he smiled before kissing your trembling thighs “How ya feeling?” you curled a finger at him and his smile turned into a full blown smirk as he kissed his way up your body before finally making it to your mouth, letting you taste yourself on him.

You could feel his hard cock pressing on your thigh so you spread your legs a little further to give him the invitation. He pressed his forehead against yours as he moved one hand to line himself up with your opening before slowly slinking in. When he was finally bottomed out you both let out a moan. 

—------------------

He held himself up once he was sure you were ready and gave a tentative thrust.  When your response was to grip his shoulders he buried his face into your neck for just a breath before it was like a thought occurred to him. He pulled back and grabbed your hands then pulled them up over your head,holding them in place as his eyes met yours “I wanna see you fall apart” he grunted and you felt yourself clench around him. 

His eyes fluttered at the feeling “Just like that then huh baby?” he sat a rough pace that meant with each roll of his hips you could feel every ridge and vein of his cock as he pounded into you.  You were itching to touch him but he still held your hands, that damn chain in your face as he worked you closer and closer to that edge.

When his fingers found your clit and he started to rub tight circles onto it you felt that pressure that had been building inside of you burst and you came with a loud moan of his name. The feeling of your orgasm pushed him over the edge as well, burying himself inside of you with one final thrust.

He finally released your hands as he buried his face in the bend of your neck, both of you working to get your breathing back to normal. Your hands went to his shoulders, smoothing down the muscles as your lips kissed any skin you could reach. 

He laughed lightly and leaned up to press a kiss to your lips “A damn chain got us to admit how we felt” you shrugged and tapped it “I happen to like that damn chain” he looked down to where he was still buried hip deep in you “Yeah, I like it pretty good myself”

[thebiggerbear]

"Sleep. I'll keep you safe." - Soldier Boy Prompt Response

Summary: You're tired of running and you go to Soldier Boy for protection. He agrees to do it but not without a price.

Pairing: Soldier Boy x Female!Reader

A/N: Prompt from @thelonelyempath. The original character I wanted to respond to this prompt with before deciding to make it multi-character. This scenario immediately popped into my head reading the line and I just had to write it. Hope it's okay.

Thank you to my beta @rieleatiel for her services. You rock, girl!

Sequel

Warnings: violence/murder; implied assassination attempts; sexual propositioning; Soldier Boy being himself; starts out as a blackmail type dynamic that appears as if a little dubcon at first; language?

Word Count: 2528

Taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187

SB Taglist: @heartlessdelusions; @nancymcl; @brightlilith

Jensen Taglist: @samanddeaninatrenchcoat

You can also read on AO3

"Sleep. I'll keep you safe."

Beau version ✨ Dean version ✨ Jenny version ✨ Tom version ✨ Jason version ✨ Anael version ✨ SDV Alex version

You never thought in a million years that you would be seeking out one of the most dangerous Supes in the world for protection. Then again, you never would have thought that a multi-billion dollar corporation would be after you, intent on seeing you torn apart and scattered to the four winds. You didn’t exactly blow the whistle on them, but you didn’t exactly tow the company line either—something Stan Edgar was less than thrilled with and now the evil son of a bitch wanted you dead.

It was no secret that Edgar and Soldier Boy had a falling out of sorts after the truth about his being handed to the Russians had come to light. His old team may have made it happen, but it was Edgar pulling the strings all along. Surprisingly, the Supe who had been so focused on revenge hadn’t hunted Edgar down after this revelation, which made you wary about going this route. However, after narrowly escaping the latest death squad sent after you, you decided you had no choice but to take the gamble. There was nowhere you could run that Vought wouldn’t find you and you just hoped this would be more of an ‘enemy of my enemy’ situation rather than a ‘handing you right over to your enemy’ situation.

Once you had managed to track him down in Hong Kong while you were busy running yourself, he had shockingly agreed to a meet, and even more shockingly agreed to help you. Not without certain stipulations, of course.

“Let me in that sweet pussy of yours and you’ve got yourself a deal.”

You should have known, especially from the way he had been eyeing you up ever since he caught sight of you. Screwing your face up in disgust, you flat out refused. “Not happening.”

He shrugged and began to walk away. “Then you must not need my protection that badly.”

You scoffed in disbelief. “You’re seriously turning me down because I won’t fuck you? Whatever happened to the ‘Soldier Boy is America’s son’ bullshit? The OG superhero who fought Nazis and protected people?”

Soldier Boy stopped and slowly turned back towards you. “I’d be putting myself on the line to protect you. For that, I deserve one hell of a payment.” 

You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms. “So now you’re blackmailing me into sleeping with you? Unbelievable.” You had heard he was more like America’s Asshole than its Son, but you still couldn’t believe your ears. You had even offered to help him take Vought down with what you knew, so long as he kept you safe. You knew he’d want that kind of information. Why else was he hopping from continent to continent in the last few months, trying to shake Vought just like you were? Instead, his dick was taking top priority. Typical. 

“It’s the least you can do, doll.” He faced you fully again, shield hanging off of his arm as if it weighed nothing. “Like you said, I fought for this country, fought the Nazis, and now you’re asking me to play bodyguard while taking on Vought for you. I deserve something worth all that trouble.”

You ran through all other options in your mind. You still had a contact that could possibly put you in touch with someone that wouldn’t mind tapping into Vought’s offshore accounts that weren’t supposed to exist. You were already on Vought’s kill list; what would a few hundred thousand dollars of theirs matter? “I could pay you,” you offered.

“I’m not interested in money.” His eyes roved over you as he approached. “Besides,” he murmured as he came to a stop in front of you. You tensed as he reached up to tuck a strand of your hair that had gotten loose from under your ball cap behind your ear. ”I haven’t had a looker as pretty as you in a long time. Been locked away.” He gently gripped your chin in between his thumb and index finger, his eyes intent on your mouth before lifting to meet yours. A hint of a smirk started to appear on his handsome face when he most likely heard your heart beat starting to increase.

He released you and even took a step back from you, allowing you physical and metaphorical space. “Your call.”

You bit your lip as thoughts chaotically swirled inside your head. On one hand, you refused to be manipulated or pushed into sex with this asshole. No matter how physically attractive he might be, you weren’t willing to get on your back just so he would help you. But on the other hand, the cold hard truth was that you were tired — tired of running, tired of little-to-no sleep, tired of the paranoia that came with such a flight. Hell, at present, you hadn’t slept in almost two days and you were running on fumes; there wasn’t enough caffeine or energy pills in the world to get you through another day with no rest. Your reaction time was already dragging if your last narrow escape was anything to go by. If you continued this way, you’d be dead before the sun started to warm the sky; you were certain of it.

Soldier Boy stared you down. “What’s it gonna be?”

You didn’t answer. Instead, you glanced behind you at a small noise far off down the street. Thankfully, it was an old woman tossing something out onto the pavement, but you couldn’t deny it put you further on edge. You turned back to the Supe whose eyes stayed trained on you. You took a deep breath to steady your nerves and readied your response. His lips began to quirk upwards into a smile; he knew what your answer was going to be before you even said the words.

Vought Tower had been completely demolished. Luckily, it had been mostly evacuated before the destruction occurred. A fight between Soldier Boy and the now-dead Homelander had caused most of the damage, but the C4 that had been carefully lined throughout the infrastructure is what ended up bringing it down. 

Before it went boom, Soldier Boy had approached Stan Edgar, who refused to cower in a corner. The Supe respected that, but it didn’t change what he’d come here to do. He gripped Edgar by the throat and lifted him in the air, choking the older man and ignoring the fingers that desperately clawed at his hand.

“I thought we had an agreement,” Edgar rasped out.

Soldier Boy shrugged. “She made me a better one.” He then snapped the man’s neck and tossed his body aside like a rag doll. 

“Oi! We ought to get out of here,” Butcher warned after seeing Stan Edgar lifeless on the floor. “Frenchie’s about to blow this place to fucking hell.”

He glared over at the Brit and picked up his shield. He still didn’t trust him, not after what he and his merry band of assholes had tried to do the last time they’d teamed up, but he’d made a deal with you and he was intent on keeping his end of it. The only conditions Butcher and Captain Lesbo had given this time around was: no civilian casualties and Ryan was off limits. He did his best with the first and he could give less than a fuck on the other. As far as he was concerned, the kid was Butcher’s problem as long as the kid didn’t come looking for some payback once he got older, which Butcher assured he wouldn’t. That, and there better not be Novichok gas waiting at the end of this mission for him. They’d reluctantly agreed, knowing they had no other way to kill Homelander and take down Vought all in one swoop.

“After you.” Soldier Boy gestured for Butcher to leave first. The man scowled but obliged, keeping a wary eye out as he moved. Smirking, Soldier boy followed. The Supe might have enjoyed the reaction—or even tried to settle the score from Butcher’s previous betrayal—if he didn’t have you to get back to. He needed to let you know that you no longer had Stan Edgar or Vought to worry about. He’d kept up his end of the bargain you’d both made — now, finally, you were free.

You woke up to the sound of someone moving through the darkness in your room. You grabbed the gun from beneath your pillow and bolted upright as much as you could, trying to get your eyes to adjust so you could get a good shot.

“Relax, it’s just me,” Soldier Boy assured you. 

Recognizing his voice, you slowly lowered the gun and focused on his location. When your eyes finally adjusted, you realized he was near the foot of the bed, completely nude, his hair damp from a fresh shower. “Ben,” you breathed out in relief. “You scared me.”

Through the beams of moonlight shining into the room from the window, you saw him give you a smile and lay his shield down on the floor next to him. “Didn’t mean to.”

You slipped the safety back on the gun and stashed it into the drawer of your nightstand. You hated having it under your pillow at night; it was super uncomfortable and you only needed to do that when Soldier Boy — Ben, as he’d asked you to call him instead — wasn’t around. “Everything go okay?” 

“Better than okay.” You glanced back to see a smirk adorning that handsome face of his, with an all-too familiar gleam in those green eyes. You watched as he slipped on some sweats and then made his way to the opposite side of the bed. You moved onto your side to face him, smiling as he climbed in next to you and sat up against the headboard, turning to grin down at you. Within seconds, he had his arms wrapped around you, pulling you up against him, and he was kissing you a proper hello. He only pulled back when you needed air and tenderly rubbed his nose along yours, nuzzling you. “How about you, doll? Everything go okay while I was gone?”

You nodded and snuggled into his bare chest, letting out a relieved sigh when you felt his warm hands stroking your back. “Everything’s fine,” you assured him, closing your eyes. You’d never admit it aloud, but you felt so much better when he was around. Not only did you feel protected but you just felt better in general. You’d have to be under the pain of torture to admit to him (or yourself) that you actually missed him when he had to leave.

He pressed a kiss to the top of your head and let his lips linger there, continuing to rub your back just the way you liked. “Edgar and Vought are gone,” he murmured. “The Caped Cunt, too. You’ve got nothing more to worry about.”

Your eyes snapped open and you lifted yourself up to meet his gaze, your brows furrowed. “What?” You asked in shock.

“You heard me.” He stroked your cheek with his thumb, his grin now a smug smile. “You’re safe, baby.”    

Your eyes widened when the realization hit you. “That’s where you went?”

Your only answer was the lengthening of that smile. 

“Jesus, Ben.” So many thoughts and emotions swirled within you all at once. You were free, truly free. You no longer had to worry about Vought death squads hunting you down, Homelander coming for you, or Stan Edgar sending after you any ragtag Supes he could scrounge up. You were free. Although, Ben hadn’t told you that he was about to go on his most dangerous mission yet. He might be America’s original superhero and he might be tough to kill, but that didn’t mean he was completely invincible. He’d admitted as much to you over the last few months. “What if… What if you didn’t—”

He kissed you, effectively cutting you off. “I did,” he hummed against your lips. “Told you I would.”

You nodded, gently tracing his facial features with your hands before gliding down to his shoulders, dipping down the warm expanse of his back and then slowly returning to his chest. As always, he remained patient whenever you did this ritual of checking him for any wounds or injuries, knowing you wouldn’t find any but needing to assure yourself just the same. Truthfully, this man had come to mean more to you than you’d ever imagined would be possible. Hell, there had been a time when it wouldn’t have been possible at all.

When you were done, you met his gaze head on. “Do I want to know?”

Ben remained silent, but his eyes said it all: no, you didn’t want to know. You and Ben may have planned for the downfall of Vought and the ends of Homelander and Stan Edgar, the very same bastards that had put a target on your back in the first place, but that didn’t mean you wanted to hear the gory details of their deaths. You were just grateful Ben had come back to you alive and unharmed. 

You gave him a thin-lipped smile in understanding. “Thank you,” you whispered. 

Ben studied you for a moment, then pulled you in and kissed you again, his fingers slipping through your hair until he grabbed the back of your neck and urged you to meet him more fully. Just as you were getting into it, he broke away and chuckled. “You’re real eager for me, aren’t you, sweetheart?” You shot him a look and the smirk was suddenly back on his face. Without warning, he picked you up to rearrange you in the bed how he wanted you. “Too bad that you need to get some rest. We’re blowing the fuck out of here tomorrow and you’re gonna need to keep up.”

As if he would leave you behind if you couldn’t. “I thought you said Butcher would leave us alone after this.”

“I don’t trust that dicksucking Brit and I trust his bitch of a boss even less.”

You rolled your eyes, smirking when you felt him settle in behind you, knowing how much he enjoyed spooning you like this. “‘Kay,” you agreed. He had successfully protected you this far; you’d follow his lead on this one, too. You shut your eyes and snuggled into your pillow, content to feel his hands on your back caressing you once more.

You were just about asleep when you heard him murmur in your ear, “Sleep. I’ll keep you safe.” You smiled when you heard the words he’d been saying to you every night now for many months and your heart lightened when you felt his hands trail from your back to cup protectively over your rounding stomach, rubbing gently. ‘Safe’ is exactly how you felt right in this moment, and the little girl moving to meet her father’s embrace—like she always did when she sensed he was near—only cemented the knowledge that this was the first night neither you nor she were in danger any longer. It gave you a sense of peace you hadn’t known in a long time.

dividers by @firefly-graphics

[unremarkableyaks]

i swear i will get back to maxy's paddock gear and little content (you can send an ask for inspo 😉) but first a comment on alex and the williams situation:

i am absolutely fascinated to see what this does to james' and alex's relationship. based on everything that has come out, we know it was extremely short notice before the announcement for alex as well, and in his interviews he definitely was alluding to a lot of problems behind the scenes within the team pertaining to logan's situation and how it all panned out--saying "i'll leave it like that"--the same way oscar kind of did and the same way a few of the guys in indy were commenting on the poor situation within williams because of logan and kyle kirkwood's friendship.

it's clear that alex and logan's relationship is positive and alex was pretty forthcoming about trying to support logan and be the veteran teammate in a mentoring sort of role. in a lot of the interviews he praised/supported/defended logan and most recently said they are friends more personally, so i would bet alex really fought hard for him. but obviously it seems like nobody really heard him out or considered it.

i'm sure alex wasn't thrilled with the whole logan situation, but this feels like the first time we've witnessed james doing something that alex fundamentally disagrees with. alex has been vocal with his support for logan and imagine that translated to talks that we are not privy to. and judging by alex's vibe recently and how he was in the video of them having that team talk, he is not at all happy with the situation. james turned his back on alex's opinion and we know that while putting the process in motion was sudden, james' plan most likely was not. alex has also said he values loyalty and work environments and wants to protect himself and his relationships, and james did not respect that. so at this point it wouldn't surprise me if alex is questioning his future with the team, especially because carlos moving there feels like a hard to gauge scenario. but regardless, alex albon does not strike me as a guy who would tolerate a stab in the back like that from his TP over and over, especially when the image james has curated is the complete opposite.

so basically, i think alex is pissed off and possibly reconsidering his whole relationship and role with james and within the team, and he is right to do so.

[spaceumbredoggos]

There has been a criminal absence of recent Yandere Bill Cipher x Reader headcanons, so I made some. Also, the tumblr folks eat this shit up. It’s hilarious. No one cares about my Kenz fic that I pour my heart and soul into, but when it comes to Yandere Bill, you thirst for the man. I am currently only taking headcanon requests (will elaborate later) because art takes forever to make.

All these HC’s also apply to Bill’s Relationship with my self insert OC. Just if they didn’t exist, like tumblr thinks they don’t. Please give So Much for Stardust the love it deserves. I’ll appreciate it.

Bill is very touchy feely to a criminal degree. (That’s as far as I’m gonna go because I don’t wanna have to put a content warning, and I don’t wanna come across as triggering. In my mind, it’s in line with Bill’s character to be that free candy van uncle.)

Does Bill possess Y/N? Does grass grow? Does a bear shit in the woods? That’s one of his favorite things to do. And he’s really good at covering his tracks. You bet your ass Y/N will wake up fucking wounded and sore from frequent possessions.

If Y/N dies, which would be pretty rare given Bill’s obsession, they’re gonna end up as a sinner in hell with their soul owned by Bill. Bill is higher than god himself on the hierarchy of my headcanoned Hellaverse if he did exist (which would be fucking hilarious, but given how much I hate Vivzie for various reasons, I doubt Hirsch would accept a collab since Vivzie has a heinous track record. My recent hyperfixation of the Hellaverse is clearly showing.) Bill would act almost like an overlord this way, and it’ll be sorta like a Val and Angel Dust relationship that’s written better. (I’m skirting around the most taboo parts of this to avoid triggering people including myself.)

Odds are, Y/N wouldn’t die. Bill has plans for them after all. So good luck avoiding his agenda of building a portal. Also, he’ll probably leave Alex Hirsch alone a lot, which may or may not lead to a drought in his Gravity Falls content. Bill’s likely to start a cult at this point to hunt Y/N down, specifically out of all those down bad fankids who’d let him do unspeakable things to them.

Bill will resort to all sorts of psychological torture. Maybe even projecting himself into your video games and other media that you delve into, with various alternate versions of himself (I’m glaring at you, Volo from Pokemon Legends Arceus.)

With every single fandom you hold dear tainted (and he’s gonna do a lot of unspeakable things to fandoms), you will be molded into serving him. If his interpretation from character AI taught me anything (which I no longer support) it’s that he needs total obedience from a slave and would stop at nothing to have that.

Good luck going off the grid to avoid him, because that’s when shit gets 100 times worse. With no contact with those you care about, he’d start driving you crazy. And if you managed the injuries he did to your body when he possessed it successfully, you won’t be able to manage any further injury that happens from your eventual insanity.

Bill has a blood kink times 11. He’ll do anything to make you bleed, but not bleed out. Blood and pain is what he feeds on.

He’s going to be speaking in Y/N’s head all the fucking time. He’ll be mixing his voice directly into Y/N’s own thoughts, taking over their entire fantasies, and quite possibly drive them to the point of dissociating in a psych ward for any sort of relief if they don’t build a portal for him to cross over.

This isn’t a scenario where Y/N is blind to all the red flags, and if it were, there’d still be nothing they could really do. Y/N is powerless, riddled with fear, and trying to flee and fight at any turn. Bill truly has them trapped from the moment he laid his possessive eye on them.

[judasgot-it]

Hihi!! So uh, Im not sure if your requests are open or not but, could you write a Dazai x GN!reader fic based on the song "Memories"by Conan Gray? If your requests aren't open then thats fine anyways have a nice day! :D

oh we are so ON I fucking love abusing Dazai. Also sorry about this one dude I am like going THROUGH IT but dw I'm getting better

also btw song recommendations cause I was also listening to it when writing this fic:

Bad Man - Alex G

Memories - Conan Gray

Scenario: Ex! Dazai coming back to the reader over and over again.

You didn't know how you felt.

A million feelings passed through your heart as you gazed through the glass, staring straight into the hallway.

Of course the bastard chose now to come here, at fuck off o'clock, when he could have done it at any other time.

"Y/n. Please let me in."

His voice was quiet. Defeated.

It was fake, you had to keep reminding yourself of that.

He was playing it all up. An act.

You didn't want to let yourself open the door.

It was cruel to leave him out in the rain.

You looked out the window again. The bastard was still there, staring blankly at your door. He knew how to look miserable.

Like a wet, abandoned dog.

Fucker.

"Dazai. Go home. Please."

You hoped he heard you. Resting your head against the door, you waited for him to respond.

Knocks.

He knocked three times. You could feel his knucks rap against the door, impatient.

You sighed. It was hopeless. He wouldn't give up.

"Y/n. Please."

His face was more miserable than you imagined as you swung the door open. His wet hair was pressed against his forehead, his eyebrows furrowing so deep they nearly hid his mocha eyes. The way he stared at you made you want to run away - it was intense, something more than human.

The only thing that blocked him from your home was your body. He stepped towards you. A small one, where you could see the rain dripping from his body start to leech onto your carpet.

You averted his gaze and stepped aside, letting him walk inside freely.

This would end the same as it always did.

"Close the door, I'll get you a towel."

Keeping your gaze anywhere else but him, you walked inside of your house, letting him inside. He was quiet as he got comfortable, but it grated on your ears - how he knew where to put his shoes, how he stepped right into your kitchen, sitting in the same seat he always sat in.

There was a corner seat along your kitchen bar, dedicated just for him. One that had a chair that wobbled as he sat upon it, creaking with his weight.

He was sitting in your home as if he belonged there.

It forced you to stare back at him, as he stared at the painting on your wall, his hair dripping all over your tiled floor.

His coat was hung on the coat rack, as if it belonged there.

"I'm making tea."

Maybe if you ignored him, he would go away. Like a recurring nightmare where you could never run away fast enough.

Unfortunately, his presence was a little too big to be ignored. Like his cologne, with the way it smelled as sweet as a rotting body, forcing you to feel him through all of your senses.

"Y/n, I'm sorry for what I said."

"I don't want to hear that. I meant what I said last time. It's over Dazai, we're over."

You didn't let him look into your eyes as you kept your eyes on the kettle, using it as a sort of shield. At this point you were hoping he would be stupid to come behind you, so then you could throw it at him. Then you could see him have a reason to finally use the bandages covering his skin.

The exhaustion was getting to you. The idiot was wearing you down, he knew how to make people break.

It was easy to give him the satisfaction.

"I really do love you. You mean everything to me."

A deep breath. The air filled your lungs, making you realize that you had hunched over a little too much. Picking your head up, you got the bravery to look Dazai in the face again.

He truly looked pathetic, his wet hair plastered to his cold skin.

But his eyes looked as dead as ever. You couldn't see anything past them.

These really were just words to him.

"If you cried would it mean anything to you anymore?"

Dazai blinked at you. He slowly raised his eyebrow, giving you a moment to rethink your sentence.

You kept your face calm. The wait felt like walking through hell.

"I meant what I said Y/n."

He repeated his words, ignoring what you said entirely. There was a small smile on his face, as if that would change the situation at all.

Tonight would end the same as it always had. You tried to change the ending but Dazai was imperiable to your efforts. He was wearing you down like an old kitchen knife.

"I meant what I said too, Dazai. You need to leave."

You could feel how hard he hit his own face, as if punishing himself for the rejection. The laughter that shook his wet body was nearly mechanical - a little too loud for what the room could ever call for.

Dazai truly looked strange as he shook in his chair - his chair, as no one else could claim a chair that was bound to break at a moment's notice.

"Please, Y/n. Please. Stop. Why do you do this to me?"

He leaned his back against the wall, with only two legs on the ground. Like a child, he rocked like that, back and forth.

"Please, please, please. I'm sorry. I said I'm sorry. I'm here and I'm sorry. I'll let you kick me, I-"

He hit his head against the back of the wall, making a sound you'd rather not hear again from the man.

"I'll do anything. I'll let you kick me, spit on me. I'll be your dog for as long as you want, I'll beg. I'm begging right now Y/n, just please! I need you, I'm not anything without you."

He was crying, his voice great at lying. His face was too.

But his eyes still looked dead. It was all fodder.

The light behind his eyes, if you can ever even recall there ever being one, was out. All that was staring at you were two dead marbles. They had no destination, their game having ended long ago.

"I don't know why I let you in here."

The kettle began to scream. Your body ran to shut the heat off, for a second successfully ignoring Dazai.

You found yourself watching your hands as they automatically pulled out two sets of cups, getting ready to your tea. You had to force yourself to stop as you looked back at Dazai, still in his claimed spot.

He didn't live here anymore.

"I thought you were making tea?"

You stared at him, looking back to the box of tea on your counter. It was waiting for the two of you, like it always had after your fights.

A peace offering, even after the worst of them.

"No. Dazai, I'm sorry."

It was horrible, the way your voice began to choke. You tried to swallow it at first, but it felt futile.

"I can't keep doing this, Dazai. It's over. You have to go home."

It was frustrating - how you had tears welling up in your eyes, how your face began to swell. But it was worth saying.

"We can talk it out Y/n. I know I messed up, but I promise we can be better next time. We can work it out!"

"Get out. Please, just get out."

You turned away from him, putting away his mug in the cabinet.

Your mug. You bought it, with your money.

"While you're at it, go get your things that you haven't bothered to pick up."

Doing the best you could, you kept your back turned away from him, making your own cup of tea. Just the way you liked it, without bothering to think of how he liked his.

It left half of a kettle of hot water left. You elected to ignore it still.

It took a good minute or two as you waited for Dazai to get the message. He was sitting in that chair, waiting for you to get the mug out, to pour him a drink again.

Instead, you found the view of your blank wall much more interesting.

In your mind it was between nothing and forever when he finally stood up - knowing the way around your apartment and grabbing the items he quite possibly left on purpose, and to the time he got to the door.

He didn't leave just yet. The door didn't open.

"It's still raining."

He said that, waiting for you to respond.

Your eyes had drawn the face of Steve Jobs on the wall instead, trying your best to ignore him. It was hard too, since you could feel the tears rolling down your cheeks in waves.

It took forever when he had finally cleared his throat, taking one step towards the door. You didn't respond.

It was a long moment between that step and the next.

Then the next. And the next. And another.

The door clicked open after that, closing rather loudly. The loudest Dazai's lack of a presence ever felt in your life.

ok I think I'm finally done doing sad angsty stuff with Dazai. It's just too damn easy ! (I say this when I had this in my drafts for MONTHS)

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SAEjwwo9S1g

So I know everyone knows this interview off by heart and it’s been spoken about A MILLION TIMES but I would just love love to hear you ramble about from 10:20 onwards bc omg it’s just so sweet and your thoughts on things are always perfection :’) like Miles seems like he’s keeping an eye on Alex for the whole interview and playing off his humour but the fond/amused/exasperated ‘please do’ that he says when Alex goes ‘just to add to that’, and how he sort of glances at Martin in an ‘ah where is this going’ sort of way is just gorgeous xD and the way he squeezes his eyes shut, just waiting to feed off whatever Alex says but wondering what on earth is about to come out of his mouth is just so tender and pure 😭😂 like miles you sweetheart xD

omg i will take ANY opportunity to ramble about this absolute gem of an interview (and about them generally, as we know lol)

anyway yeah, this whole interview truly is peak milex derangement - and this little section in particular??? ughhh it just feels like such an intimate insight into their humour and the way they mess around together. like you can tell they're a bit bored with the interview, and it makes me wonder if this is what they get like when they're bored and restless on bus journeys, waiting for soundcheck etc - if they descend into the same affectionate, humorous madness that no one else quite knows how to deal with. it feels like such a window into their everyday lives and way of interacting, and ugh i just love it, how easy it is to imagine them talking in silly voices and being totally wrapped up in each other in all these other scenarios 🥺

one of absolute my favourite things about this clip is how you can just tell how UTTERLY in tune they are with each other - even when they're not really that engaged with the situation they're in. the way they know each other's subtlest inflections of expression and twist of phrase without even thinking about it. it's all so totally instinctive, and i actually think their interchanges like these, when we get a glimpse into their unique alex-and-miles humour, are at least as intimate as a lot of their more *ahem* explicitly intimate moments onstage. because they just show the way they completely and utterly get each other, how they've built up this whole way of interacting that's just them. miles and alex and no one else.

and you're totally right, you can FEEL the fond exasperation radiating from miles, and also like - idk, just this quiet delight he's clearly taking in alex's presence? it's something you see with both of them a LOT, this sense that they just love being around each other and (even in situations like this where they’re not really into what’s happening around them) there’s nowhere else they really want to be. idk how to explain it, it just feels like there’s just this underlying sense of completion and contentedness when they’re with each other - probably because they’re able to truly be their whole selves when they’re together 🥺

UGHHHHH they make me so emotional 😩

also all the suggestiveness of the “little finger” bits and the way you can SEE miles trying not to get the giggles??? absolute gold 😭

oh dear, i fear this has been ended up being a much longer ramble than i intended, i hope at least some of it made sense 😅 thank you so much for your lovely words and for giving me the opportunity to flail about our two favourite smitten idiots, i love asks like these 🥰🥰

PS i’m so sorry it took me so ridiculously long to answer this - i actually thought i’d posted it weeks ago, but just came across it when i was sorting through my drafts this afternoon 🤦🏻‍♀️

[bonzos-number-1-fan]

TMAGP 23 Thoughts: Not Not NotThem

After quite the hiatus we're back with another guest writer. This time it's Harlan Guthrie of Malevolent fame. A show I likely won't ever get around to listening to but have heard nothing but good things about. So everyone go check it out if you liked this. This one is very obviously from a guest writer too. Its style and contents are pretty distinct from TMA. Which is not a bad thing by any means and it's a really great episode overall.

Spoilers for episode 23 below the cut.

There isn't a huge amount to dig into in the opening scene. I do like that the paperwork is a continuing process and it's pretty likely there will be some sort of pay of too it. Lena doesn't seem to be lying in this scene either. She really does seem to think that it's a prank. So assuming it's not a prank she doesn't seem to have as tight a grip on the office as she thinks she does. It's also interesting how engrossed it makes Sam but that might just be a character quirk rather than anything greater.

I really liked this incident but, honestly, I really don't have a load to say on this incident. I thought it was a really well written incident but quite explicit as incidents go and not a huge amount to dig into for larger puzzle pieces. It's also always tricky to know what's meaningful to the larger story when there is a guest writer. Jonny and Alex do give input but it's not like we know what that input is. Either way there is only two things I can think to mention here for it. The first is the time discrepancy in the post dates. The penultimate post comes a months after the final post. Which might not really mean much of anything to be honest. This is a doppelganger incident and those have typically had time discrepancies in them but the nature of this one doesn't lead to an easy explanation of that. So it might mean something, or it might be a mistake. I don't think it's a particularly important detail as of yet in either case.

The other bit in the mention of copper. Copper is a planetary metal, along with things like silver and mercury that have recently appeared, but the symbolic nature of those is a tricky subject to get into. Alchemy as a subject is mixed up with a lot of newer takes on things and so any its not always wise to assign too much in the way of importance to that. But that being said copper is the metal of Venus, both the planet and the god. Venus/Aphrodite obviously have some strong connection to this sort of incident. However part of the reason for copper being associated with Venus is copper's role as a metal to make mirrors from. That's a more compelling angle to this one for me. Alesis did pretty literally make their mirror double here.

Newman is a very on the nose name here too.

Sam and Celia's Institute sleuthing has not a whole lot of interest for me either if I'm honest. Basira and Helen are Basira and Helen, not much to say there until we meet them. The version of John and Martin Sam identified is weird though. It's weird in that it doesn't actually make any sense. He said they were "close to the right age" but that doesn't really track. It either means they were born at the right time, or died at the right time. But in either scenario it's sort of just nonsense. If they were born at the right time they died around 10. That's obviously possible but it raises a lot of questions about why Celia would be looking into some 10 year olds. If they died at the right age then they're offset by about 20 years which also doesn't track with anything else we've seen. The only other scenario is that she's not looking for TMP's John and Martin but rather TMA's as that could account for a time discrepancy but if that's the case neither of those ages are the right age. So all of that is probably a red herring.

Gwen and Alice opening up to each other is really nice to see too. Even though they do both hate each other outside of Sam and Alice they're the characters with the most history and it's great to see that having some weight. There isn't anything new here from our perspective, other than [Error] having too many eyes but that's not a big shock, but it's nice that the characters are actually talking about this stuff. It did seem pretty likely that they'd all be having their own insular adventures around the mid-season point but having them all come together like this is a nice thing to see.

I’ve not been “arsey”- bzzt

10/10

Great ep all around.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Incident/CAT#R#DPHW Master Sheet and Terminology Sheet

DPHW Theory: 3536 seems pretty normal to me on this one. The more data I get the less I feel like anything comes up that needs explaining in my theory. Beyond the initial shift from my conceptions of these groups as fears to broader thematic elements I think this is proving to be pretty rock solid now. I'll keep this section around but I do think there will be not much of interest in these at this point.

CAT# Theory: 13 is great for my "It's not People/Places/Objects" essay. There wasn't an object in this one. Coral are animals and so count as people, the host is person, the Not Not NotThem also a person. If you say that animals count as objects it creates large problems in the theory. I really should have a sit down to puzzle this one out.

R# Theory: BC is interesting because initially I thought that was a bit low as the most similar case to this format was RedCanary's and that's AB. But that also had a lot more interaction and photos included which would bump it up for my theory there. So this one does actually check out.

Header talk: Transformation (Dysmorphic) -/- Doppleganger (Infection) is very peculiar. Daria's incident has a very similar header but Dysmorphic was the crosslink and Full was the subsection. Hard to know if it means anything but it's interesting in some sense of the word.

[pippin-katz]

Reverse Character Bleed

Okay I wrote about this already, but it was on a reblog of a GIF set, so I decided to make its own post. I've decided to use a phrase to attempt to describe why Taylor and Nicholas' performances feel so different to watch.

I'm referring to it as reverse character bleed.

Character bleed is a term used to for when an actor subconsciously starts adopting behaviors and personality traits of the character they are playing. They don't do it intentionally. Sometimes when you spend so much time in the mindset of a character, it's a little difficult to turn it off completely. There are moments where you might find yourself thinking how the character would respond rather than how you would respond.

This is, again, subconscious. I'm not referring to a situation like an actor being asked what their favorite flavor of ice cream is, and in their head they think, "What would [x]'s favorite flavor be?" An easy example of what I am referring to would be their favorite color, because that changes over time for a lot of people anyway.

Say that your favorite color is yellow, but you're in a scenario where you are seeing the color blue a lot. You don't feel any sort of way about blue; you don't dislike it, but you don't like it either.

So, you are seeing blue everywhere. Maybe it's the color of your team's jersey, or the fabric you're working with, or paint you're using.

If you are enjoying the experience, you will likely develop a positive opinion of that color blue. This is because of the association of blue with the fun or happiness or excitement you felt during that experience. Obviously! Everyone knows about color association! But this can happen without realizing it until later, when someone asks you, "What's your favorite color?"

The thing about a lot opinions of this nature is that you don't typically spend a lot of time actually thinking about them on your own. You don't typically sit down for twenty minutes, pondering what your favorite color is in your head. Likes and dislikes, at least common ones, are typically better suited for conversations, not your internal dialogue (if you have that).

So, you probably were never randomly sitting around and had the thought, "I think my favorite color is blue instead of yellow."

But when someone asks you, instead of immediately responding with yellow, you pause to consider it. Because now you have another color that you associate strong, positive feelings with, that you did not even realize were there.

It's that subconsciousness that I'm referring to with character bleeding. Actors wouldn't notice until someone points it out. Think about how we can see similarities between Taylor and Alex, but Taylor seems to think they're nothing alike.

The interesting thing here is that this is not a case of character bleed. Character bleed would be Taylor and Nicholas adopting traits of Alex and Henry. But this is the reverse. It feels like Alex and Henry subconsciously adopted traits and behaviors from Taylor and Nicholas.

Now, what the hell do I mean by this? Let me talk you through it!

The best example of this reverse character bleed in my opinion is the scene of Henry holding Alex's hand when Alex asks for him to take a walk with him.

Time for the GIFs:

Taylor and Nicholas are close friends in real life.

When you are friends with someone, you care about them and their wellbeing. If they are upset, you want to comfort them. If they get hurt, you want to help them and do what you can to protect them from getting hurt whenever you're with them.

Take the adorable moment from their first GQ article where the journalist describes Taylor as "sinking into protective mode" when discussing Nicholas' injury.

As silly as this is to read, it's probably accurate!

It's in the past, but again, when someone you care about gets hurt, you want to protect them. It's natural to feel protective after the fact, especially if you weren't there to help.

Back in high school, my best friend and I were in theatre. There was a show that she did, that I didn't, and there was a small stunt that involved her character and dry ice. She had to crouch down in a box to look like she fell down a chute with the dry ice effect helping sell it.

Someone spilled the dry ice into the box, and my friend ended up touching it with her bare hands and her legs. She got burned, obviously, but no one did anything about it. The show kept going, and even though her character was practically done for the show, no one took her to the hospital or emergency room for the ice burns.

I was furious when I heard about it. If I had been there, I would have cussed out our director/teacher and fucking demanded that someone take her to the doctor. Fuck the show, ice burn from dry ice is no-joke. I still get angry whenever I think about it.

This is to say that Taylor having a noticeable reaction to the discussion of Nicholas' injury is completely realistic. He doesn't have a reason to get angry like I did for my friend, but he experiences the same worry/concern after the fact.

Caring for your friend's wellbeing includes their mental health, obviously. So, consider: Taylor and Nicholas are at an event together. For some reason, Taylor starts feeling anxious or nauseous. Nicholas is going to be worried about him. That's just a fact of friendship.

Somehow that real life connection makes Henry’s concern for Alex feel more genuine and sincere.

It's as though Alex and Henry subconsciously adopted traits and behaviors from Taylor and Nicholas, rather than the other way around. Reverse character bleed is the only way I can think to describe it.

Anyway, that's all! I'm really excited to see them together again in the sequel! 🩵

Thanks for reading!! If you enjoyed this essay & would like to support me, you can give me a tip on my Ko-Fi! ☺️

[divorcedfiddleford]

anyway. moving on from the show itself. so possibly my hottest take is that i think journal 3 should not have been published KJSHDFLGKHSDFGUIWEHRGJSDF. basically i think instead of trying to write the actual journal 3 they should have picked a handful of stories from his research era that they wanted to tell and made a graphic novel about that. i got WAAAAAAAYYYY off topic and wrote PARAGRAPHS about this but it's not related to the question you asked so i'll just summarize by saying i think it would play more to their strengths as writers, leave more to the imagination, and they could leave out all those fucking retcons that i hate

^ excerpt from this post i made a couple weeks ago. i wanted to post those paragraphs i spoke of teehee so in case anyone is curious here they are

aside from all the retcons that i hate, i think the biggest weakness of journal 3 is that it limits the imagination. with the publishing of journal 3, they had to establish a set timeline and list of events that happened. there's no way they would have been able to construct a chronological narrative otherwise. however this is actually quite stifling to a creative audience. before it was published, the timeline was largely left open to interpretation, with only the biggest plot points being cemented. and while i'm not going to act like this was some sort of golden age of fanworks (there were a LOT of stupid theories and objectively bad content), i do think it lent itself a lot more to creativity. i distinctly remember several authors in the middle of writing having to make disclaimers that their works were no longer "canon compliant" after the release of the journal, as though that meant they were inherently of lesser value, and i think that's really too bad.

i want to be very clear here. the issue is not that alex hirsch and rob renzetti wrote stories about what happened when ford was young. the issue is that they chose the journal as the means by which to tell those stories. they had to pull a LOT of retcons just to make that even possible - some of which i'll talk about later, others (like the fact that they were DESTROYED before the end of the series) are self-evident and/or have been bemoaned by me ad nauseam - when a graphic novel would have sufficed and probably played more to their strengths as tv writers. hell, they did this later! the only reason they chose to do it as journal 3 itself is because it's like The Symbol of the show and they knew everybody would buy it and it'd be a really cool collector's item.

but the problem with turning the journal into a chronological narrative (which it wasn't originally, i'll get into that) is that you have to decide everything that happened, and by extension, everything that didn't happen. creatively, this is torture. they made a book and said "this is it, the whole book, with all of the torn pages restored magically". therefore if you come up with a scenario you think is fun for ford to be in, you have to come up with a reason why it isn't in the journal. this isn't just a problem for fans. alex and rob wrote themselves into a corner with this. the book of bobos hasn't even been released yet and we've already seen that it features "lost journal pages". they thought of other things after the fact which would be cool to include! do you understand? they now have to legitimize the fact that they weren't there in the first place, which wouldn't be an issue if they just hadn't published journal 3 in the first place! i have no idea if this makes any sense i didn't take my adderall this morning but so many of these stories would have functioned just as well as a graphic novel.

another (more nitpicky) thing is that the journals are introduced to us as scientific research. field journals. ford measures the heights of organisms, rock formations, etc. the text blocks to the side of them are scribbles in the tv show, but you are meant to infer that they are more detailed notes about each of the entries.

(image descriptions in alt text)

this stuff is SERIOUSLY LACKING in the published journal. and i get why! it's easy to imply the science in the tv show when you can just scribble to represent a block of text, but when you're publishing a book, you have to actually write all those words. alex and rob are NOT scientists, and writing realistic scientific descriptions of each anomaly is an unreasonable request, especially given the fact that they were so pressed for time and had a page limit. so i understand why they leaned into the diary angle instead - it's more narrative-based, it's in their wheelhouse, and it makes for better reading. but as an amateur scientist myself i was just very disappointed (the "hawktopus: too stupid to study" gag made me so sad. come on ford. i know you. i know you observed that hawktopus for like five months and took in-depth notes on its diet and behavior). again, i think this would not be a problem if the actual contents of the journal were limited to just what we're shown in the tv show and the audience's imagination. but i doubt very many fans care about this as much as i do shldjfkglskdfhgk

in the show, ford also seems to jump between journals as needed, implying that they were not separated chronologically - that is to say, he did not simply write in one book until it was full and then move on to the next one. this makes a lot of sense for scientific journals. you don't close the book after one encounter with an organism or phenomenon. you observe it multiple times, returning to it again and again, sometimes months or years after the initial sighting. you need to leave yourself space for future notes, which is precisely what we see ford doing here! it also made sense given the fact that he was able to go back and put part of his portal plans into each journal. if he waited until each journal was filled up before starting a new one then this would be a lot harder (he would have to add more pages to each book, which would mean redoing the binding. that's a lot of work! also he opens up journal 1 and almost immediately starts writing in it after coming out of the portal so unless there were empty pages in it beforehand when would he have time to add more pages? checkmate atheists). however this had to be changed for the book they wrote. again, i don't begrudge them for this. non-linear storytelling is HARD and, again, TIME CONSUMING! time is NOT something the writers had. but again i just think that this would not have been a problem if there wasn't a physical journal.

thank you for making it to the end of my post. as consolation here is a link to a doodle i did of ford in the portal 2 jumpsuit

[galacticwarpedlense]

Tattoos

I saw a picture with one of the bachelors with a tattoo and now that got me thinking of all the bachelors with tattoos.

Of all the characters, I think the ones that would absolutely NEVER get tattoos would be like Penny (she's very VERY traditional so I don't think she'd want them but it would be friggin hilarious to see this hyper-traditional woman tatted out), Maru (Idk, it just doesn't seem like something she would want) and Harvey (He's a doctor, he knows ink in your body isn't healthy). And maaaaaybe Sam (He seems like he would be a baby with pain or afraid of needles).

The rest, I can see getting some.

Abigail and Sebastian would probably get a decent amount of tattoos as they get older. Dare I say, Abigail would get more. Like an entire sleeve of alt tattoos. Skulls, bones, roses, quotes, funky little designs. All the Alt shit. And if you dare say anything about the tattoos being permanent, she will roast you.

Seb on the other hand may have some back tattoos and arm tattoos, not an entire sleeve but more dispersed, each showing how his style evolves while staying somewhat related. Like a story. And if they are black and white tattoos, you bet that he's letting any future children of his doodle the shit out of those tattoos with their little markers.

Elliott...A part of me knows, he probably wouldn't get tattoos either because of the cost or the reputation but also I am a simp for the idea of the writer man having some sort of book quote that he found inspirational on his collarbone so he can wake up in the morning and see it in the mirror every day. And you can't take that away from me. Ever.

Even if Emily and Haley don't get along and seem like opposites, I feel like their tattoos would be very similar. Like very flowery and cute and on their wrist or something and when they realize they have the same tattoo it's like they have witty banter about who copied who.

Leah, just artsy shit. Artsy shit everywhere. Arms, legs, back. Just little artsy tattoos everywhere with little correlation. Fuck it, this bitch MADE her own tattoos. If not the tattoo itself then at least the design.

Alex, I'm indecisive. I can see him not having any tattoos. But also a big tattoo on his arm of the name of his spouse sounds like the cheesy but kinda dumb thing he would do. Lucky him, we're using a scenario where the farmer doesn't dump him so it's a nice romantic gesture.

Shane would probably have tattoos from his past. If the beta versions of Shane were anything to go by, he seemed to be almost Alex-like in his youth so he would probably be pretty impulsive (especially at the start of whatever made him so depressed as he tries to do things to feel better) and get a few tats that now are a reflection of his past.

[squarebracketsmileyface]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I WOULD KILL FOR BIRDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT MAMA LARK AND PAPA TIM AND BUBA BRIAN AND LITTLE BIRDIE TO JUST BE THE BEST HAPPY FAMILY IN THE WORLD GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mon I hope you know this will forever be in my brain, all my thoughts, are going to be consumed by them.

Do you think inthe everyone lives au they'd want more kids or are they completely happy with their little surprise miracle? And in that vain, do you think Tim would yeet his uterus/ get his tubes tide after Birdie is born or like, again, maybe perhaps... holding out for the possibility of another....

(Don't mind me, I'm just a fiend with baby fever and the love of projecting onto my favorite guys)

~💜

Oh dude even in the 'canon' of Sorry, It's Locked Tim does end up with another kid.

The second kid is more planned than Birdie but still not entirely planned (as in, he and Brian have been talking about it and have been a bit less careful about using protection, but it still happens a lot sooner than they expected it to lol). They name this kid Jesse and it's a little boy, so Birdie gets a little brother.

In the 'everyone lives' AU I think I'd keep this. Around the time when Birdie is sorta 12-13 ish, after Brian comes back into their lives and eventually starts dating Lark and Tim, he and Tim have a kid as well, and again, that kid is Jesse.

Also Jesse is like, obsessed with his big sister when he's a baby. Like, he only wants to be held by her, he stares at her constantly, y'know? He just really loves his big sister.

OH YEAH WAIT I FORGOT TO TELL YOU SOME STUFF ABOUT BIRDIE IN THE LAST ONE.

Birdie is a bug autistic, she fucking loves insects of all kinds. Every type of insect, there isn't a single one she dislikes. However, Tim really doesn't like bugs much (blame that on waking up in the forest, lying on the floor covered in insects and insect bites) but he tries for Birdie. Like, she wants to raise caterpillars? Sure, they can do that... Except that Birdie releases the butterflies in his room one day and he almost has a panic attack so now he's gotta explain to 3-4 year old Birdie that she really "really can't do that because papa is very scared of bugs, even the pretty ones". Birdie gets it and is allowed to raise caterpillars again, but she does ask if that means she can't dress up as insects for Halloween anymore, if Tim is even scared of the pretty ones.

Obviously, Tim says she is the prettiest bug and only bug he likes. She is very happy and proceeds to dress as a shield bug for the next Halloween. Tim is just very confused by her choice 💀

Confused but supportive dad lol

I think I also forgot to mention some of how Birdie is in 'canon' S,IL while it's just her and Tim. Because even though Tim hides MH from her, he can't really hide the PTSD kinda stuff it left him with. He can't hide the nightmares that wake him up, he can't hide how scared he is when he forgets things, stuff like that. He and Birdie have this kinda routine where if he wakes her up with his nightmare she goes and sleeps in his bed with him. So she'll wake up because he's yelled or something in his dream and she'll go into his room (wake him up if he isn't already awake) and they'll cuddle until they both fall back asleep.

A lot of Tim's nightmares pot MH are about losing people, they're about losing Jay and about losing Brian, they're about killing Alex and lying to Jessica about what really happened and then never seeing her again, stuff like that. But they're also about losing Birdie. They're about sort of "what if" scenarios where he lost her before he even knew he was pregnant, where the fight with Alex at the end caused him to miscarry. They're about losing her to some horrible accident now that he actually has her to look after. They're about the Operator coming back and hurting her. They're about the Operator coming back and Tim doing to Birdie what his mum did to him, sending her away to a mental hospital and rarely coming to visit.

The ones about Birdie are the worst for him, the others he kinda knows how to deal with, he dealt with them during MH and also, they did happen. He did lose those people. In a way that makes it less scary, because it's just reliving the events in a way and he can kinda handle that. But the dreams about losing Birdie? They fuck him up. Some days even sending her off to school after a really bad nightmare about losing her feels like too much and can send him into panic attacks all day.

On days like that he and Birdie have an agreement with the school that Birdie can phone home at break and lunch, and if Tim really needs to he can phone and ask for her outside of break and lunch. He tries not to need that one, he doesn't wanna drag her out of class in front of everyone, he doesn't want the other kids to make fun of her for it, because kids can be mean like that. Birdie doesn't really care what the other kids think. She doesn't even realise that getting called out of class like that could be something to be embarrassed by. All she cares about is "my papa is sad and scared and I can make him feel better by talking to him about bugs" because on those phonecalls she literally just talks about bugs she's seen that day and Tim's just happy to listen and remember that she's alive and safe and strangely obsessed with bugs.

ALSO kinda on the same lines as this, even tho Birdie loves Brian as a teacher, she's kinda suspicious of him when he and Tim get together. Like, not massively, but the first time Brian sees Tim have a nightmare when he stays the night, he ends up getting kicked out of Tim's room by Birdie because she doesn't trust him to know how to help. She kinda gets one of those little kid power trips about being the only one who knows how to look after her papa when he has a nightmare, like, she feels all special because just being there or talking to him makes him feel better, y'know lol?

She gets all high and mighty with Brian and he tries to focus on how funny he finds it rather than panicking about whether Tim is okay.

When Birdie doesn't come out of Tim's room again Brian cracks the door to look in and absolutely melts because Birdie and Tim are sound asleep all cuddled up together. Brian sleeps on the sofa that night and ends up all manners of fucked up because it is NOT a comfy sofa to sleep on and his back is already fucked 💀

Many many spasms were had all the next day. That poor man was not having a good time. Birdie feels sorry for him and tells him that next time he can go and sleep in her bed instead.

He appreciates the offer 💀

It doesn't take much convincing from Tim for Birdie to let Brian stay after the first few times he has a nightmare while Brian is staying over, rather than her causing a whole palava kicking Brian out (cos that's not as simple as just, Brian gets up and walks out of the room, he has to transfer into his wheelchair and make sure he grabs his morning meds in case Birdie won't let him back into the room in the morning when he needs them, and make sure he brings his service dog with him cos she sleeps on the bed with him and Tim, y'know? A little less simple than "get up and walk out". Also his neck is also kinda fucked up from the fall so he has a specific pillow that he always uses, which if he doesn't he always finds his neck all kinda of fucked up in the morning, so he's gotta grab that too lol)

Anyway, eventually Brian just becomes part of their whole nightmare routine and Birdie realises that teaming up with him to look after Tim works way better than doing it on her own. So she and Brian cuddle Tim from both sides and he gets extra reminded that they're both still there. Also Brian's service dog is probably trained to help with PTSD, cos no way Brian isn't also a little fucked in the head after MH, so she can task and do deep pressure for Tim. She's a bit confused at first cos usually she does it for Brian, but she gets it very quickly. Birdie is delighted that a dog can be taught to cuddle on command.

Oh shit you asked about tubes tied and stuff as well lmao. Sorry I got so distracted.

I think after they have Jesse, Tim gets a hysterectomy and all that. He doesn't wanna go through pregnancy and birth a third time, so they get that done so he doesn't have to worry about it. He jokes that if Brian or Lark wants another kid they'll have to figure out which one of them is gonna carry it.

He'd be happy to have another kid, all three of them have pretty good jobs now (Lark's the big moneymaker for the family with Tim close behind, Brian's still a teacher because he adores kids) so they could support a third kid financially, but if they want another kid, they're gonna have to adopt or go through a surrogacy thing rather than Tim carrying it like with Birdie and Jesse.

Oh yeah also the kids names:

Birdie is "Birdie Amelia Wright"

Jesse is "Jesse Alexander Thomas"

Yes, I know it's dumb but I love it. Jesse for Jessica. Alexander for Alex. Amelia for Amy. Tim names his kids so that people who were lost to MH are still kept alive in a little way (yeah yeah Jessica is still alive, but Tim has no way of getting in touch with her so nyeh). In the 'everyone lives' AU that kinda doesn't work as well so Jesse's middle name would probably be different in that, cos Alex is still alive lol. But yeah.

@pianofirepirate helped me come up with the Kids full names :]

I've ranted to them about this shit so much recently lol.

SPEAKING OF RANTING TO THEM here's another thing we came up with:

In the 'canon' of S,IL Birdie does eventually find out about MH. Probably about when she's 15-17 I think? One of her friends tells her about it, like, mentions that her dad's look like two of the guys from this old YouTube horror series and shows her a couple things that people managed to save before Tim deleted the MH channel and all that, cos even in universe I like to think MH got relatively popular, with people thinking it was a fictional horror series. It starts a WHOLE conversation at home with Tim and Brian where they have to explain that yeah all that stuff happened to them, no they really don't remember a lot of it (especially Brian), yes people think it's fictional but it's not, etc etc etc.

Tim and Brian are upset that some 'random' kid at school showed MH to Birdie, but over all it's not a world ending thing. What it does do though, is open the floodgates on jokes about stuff that happened in MH. E.g. "can't believe you pushed me off a building" jokes. Brian uses that one so often and Tim just sighs dramatically and comes back with "First of all, you fell! And also YOU'D BEEN STEALING MY MEDS FOR YEARS AND I DIDNT KNOW WHO YOU WERE BEHIND THAT STUPID MASK!" And Birdie just sits back and watches in glee. She finds it hilarious.

Though the first time Brian accused Tim of pushing him she did go "you pushed him off a building!?!?" Like, completely taken aback and they had to explain the whole thing to her and they probably showed her the video so she could see what actually happened.

Honestly I think that maybe once Birdie is like, 18 they end up putting all the videos back up. Maybe they only privated them rather than deleting them idk. But yeah I think after a while they'd just silently put the videos back up and all the lost media people rejoiced, and there's just the unspoken thing that Birdie can watch the videos if she wants to.

She doesn't.

Like, she watches a little bit of it here and there. But she never actually sits down and watches everything, she just doesn't feel like it's something she needs to do. She watches enough to know who the people being talked about by her dads are (Amy, Jessica etc etc etc) and she watches a couple entries with Jay in them over and over and over again. But generally, she just doesn't want to watch the whole thing, y'know. She doesn't watch all of MH and she hasn't seen a single TTA video.

Wait that reminds me now again (sorry, I keep fucking doing this)

That whole thing with Tim sometimes needing to phone Birdie's school and just, like, make sure she's still alive. That doesn't fully go away when Birdie gets older and goes off to college/university. Tim's always been a bit of a helicopter parent and though he gets better at it, he and Birdie do make time to phone each other pretty much every night. Mostly it's just Birdie talking about her day and what she's been up to, and Tim listening. Occasionally he'll chip in with bits about his day, but mostly he's happy to listen to her talking about her studies. (She's gonna be a bug scientist. I can't remember what they're called. But she's gonna be a big scientist, specifically working in conservation of insects).

If Birdie misses a phone call one evening Tim will definitely start to panic a bit, but he makes sure he only sends her one or two texts to check in before he forces himself to put his phone down and go spend time with Brian and/or Jesse :]

Cos while Birdie's uni age, Jesse is only like, idk 10 at most? So Tim still has a lot to do, y'know? Jesse keeps him and Brian occupied and while he's looking after/spending time with Jesse, Tim manages to take his mind off worrying about Birdie pretty well.

[tommarvoloriddlesdiary]

Numbers 1, 13, 17, and 18 sound very interesting! Are there any snippets that you can share?

oh my 🥹 a lot to get through! hold on tight 💀

unnamed fic number one also known as spy, has a lot going on 😭

it’s very much inspired by the Alex Rider series (specifically the book: Point Blanc) - for those who don’t know what that is, it’s about a young boy whose uncle dies, and he becomes deeply entangled in a world of espionage while trying to find out who killed him. it’s really good, and they have a tv series out for which season 3 is airing in April - give it a watch! i take this concept and sort of run with it - so Harry is an in-coming seventh-year Hogwarts student who finds out his Godfather, Sirius, has died during an auror mission gone wrong. he knows someone isn’t being honest with him - and he doesn't plan on resting until he has answers. here’s a cut:

Harry takes a look around. What was it that Sirius’s mind healer used to say? Five things you can see?

He sees rows and rows of conjured chairs, a raised platform, delicately floating candles - unlit, and the billowing peak of the tent. More than ever Harry can hear Sirius’s dismay at the lack of clowns in attendance.

It’s safer here, so Harry cracks a smile and finally settles his eyes on the dark, gleaming black coffin in the very centre.

He walks carefully through the rows of chairs all circled around it and stops just before the platform raises. Harry feels the telltale sign of overwhelm brew like a potion just behind his eyes, but he shakes it off, tries to delay it. Harry is aware now that he stands there for a long, long while.

Taking a deep breath, Harry places both hands on the edge of the coffin lid and pushes up.

It doesn’t open.

————

mockumentary, also known as fic number thirteen: triwizard tournament, was discussed a bit here! but it never fails to make me laugh, so i’ll share another little cut 🤣

-

Olympe rises from her chair and towers over them. The camera tilts up until it can’t anymore and still cuts off the top of her head. She walks over to the balcony, ducking to pass through the doorway, and crosses her arms behind her back.

She gazes down at the fury of elegant chaos, a smirk creeping up her mouth. The seventh-year students are gliding to and fro, preparing to leave in abraxan-drawn carriages while the younger years watch on with wide, awe-filled eyes.

She continues, “Zhis year will not be une répétition of seventeen-ninety-two.”

————

unnamed fic number seventeen, also known as assassins, is vague one 💀

when I originally wrote down this idea, it was this: spy fic concept - Tom is an assassin, and Harry is a spy; they keep running into each other on various missions and have developed an unlikely friendship. NON-LINEAR - back and forth between past and present narrative — here’s a cut!

When Tom arrived on location, it was to a mess.

Harry Potter never held any qualms or hesitations. If there was a job that needed doing, and the justifications were moral enough, he would do whatever it took to complete it successfully. Unfortunately for Tom (and the meaningless lives that tended to be involved), Harry Potter’s modus operandi typically included wide-scale destructive explosions or the occasional all-out brawl.

This particular scenario happened to showcase the latter.

Potter was panting over an unconscious body. Possibly unknowing to the splatter of blood dotting across his chin, cheeks and nose like crimson freckles. It seemed that he’d been here much longer than Tom - deep cover, likely for months now judging by his scruffier than usual appearance. That hair in particular.

Tom exhaled softly, and thought, He looks good in red.

————

interview with a dark lord, also known as fic number eighteen, is pure nonsense 🤪 here's a cut:

-

Harry glanced over his notes, shuffling them around once, then twice. His eyes fell on one of the many, many questions he and the other Gryffindors had compiled over the night.

“Would you say your field is expanding or decreasing?” Harry asked.

“Decreasing,” Voldemort replied without hesitation. Harry’s scar prickled with something vast and telling - something that felt a lot like immense satisfaction.

A morbid curiosity reared its ugly head. “Really?” he asked and squinted his eyes a bit at Voldemort, looking him up and down. “You don’t seem to be taking that very hard?”

“Yes, and why would I, Potter?” Voldemort leaned back and crossed his legs, definitely looking smug. “It is not Dark Lords; it is Dark Lord. If my field is narrowing, and I remain the only one, all’s the better.”

————

if you'd like to send me a wip, please do! my ask box is open 🥹

[fromkenari]

A mass of fools and knaves

The full email exchange between Alex Claremont Diaz and Prince Henry Fox Mountchristen Windsor from Chapter Nine of Red, White and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston. Put here for my best friend to read.

A mass of fools and knaves A agcd@eclare45.com                8/10/20 1:04 AM to Henry H, Have you ever read any of Alexander Hamilton’s letters to John Laurens? What am I saying? Of course you haven’t. You’d probably be disinherited for revolutionary sympathies. Well, since I got the boot from the campaign, there is literally nothing for me to do but watch cable news (diligently chipping away at my brain cells by the day) and sort through all my old shit from college. Just looking at papers, thinking: Excellent, yes, I’m so glad I stayed up all night writing this for a 98 in the class, only to get summarily fired from the first job I ever had and exiled to my bedroom! Great job, Alex! Is this how you feel in the palace all the time? It fucking sucks, man. So anyway, I’m going through my college stuff, and I find this analysis I did of Hamilton’s wartime correspondence, and hear me out: I think Hamilton could have been bi. His letters to Laurens are almost as romantic as his letters to his wife. Half of them are signed “Yours” or “Affectionately yrs,” and the last one before Laurens died is signed “Yrs for ever.” I can’t figure out why nobody talks about the possibility of a Founding Father being not straight (outside of Chernow’s biography, which is great btw, see attached bibliography). I mean, I know why, but. Anyway, I found this part of a letter he wrote to Laurens, and it made me think of you. And me, I guess: The truth is I am an unlucky honest man, that speak my sentiments to all and with emphasis. I say this to you because you know it and will not charge me with vanity. I hate Congress—I hate the army—I hate the world—I hate myself. The whole is a mass of fools and knaves; I could almost except you … Thinking about history makes me wonder how I’ll fit into it one day, I guess. And you too. I kinda wish people still wrote like that. History, huh? Bet we could make some. Affectionately yrs, slowly going insane, Alex, First Son of Founding Father Sacrilege

McQuiston, Casey. Red, White & Royal Blue: A Novel (pp. 239-241). St. Martin's Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Re: A mass of fools and knaves Henry hwales@kensingtonemail.com                8/10/20 4:18 AM to A Alex, First Son of Masturbatory Historical Readings: The phrase “see attached bibliography” is the single sexiest thing you have ever written to me. Every time you mention your slow decay inside the White House, I can’t help but feel it’s my fault, and I feel absolutely shit about it. I’m sorry. I should have known better than to turn up at a thing like that. I got carried away; I didn’t think. I know how much that job meant to you. I just want to … you know. Extend the option. If you wanted less of me, and more of that—the work, the uncomplicated things—I would understand. Truly. In any event … Believe it or not, I have actually done a bit of reading on Hamilton, for a number of reasons. First, he was a brilliant writer. Second, I knew you were named after him (the pair of you share an alarming number of traits, by the by: passionate determination, never knowing when to shut up, &c &c). And third, some saucy tart once tried to impugn my virtue against an oil painting of him, and in the halls of memory, some things demand context. Are you angling for a revolutionary soldier role-play scenario? I must inform you, any trace of King George III blood I have would curdle in my very veins and render me useless to you. Or are you suggesting you’d rather exchange passionate letters by candlelight? Should I tell you that when we’re apart, your body comes back to me in dreams? That when I sleep, I see you, the dip of your waist, the freckle above your hip, and when I wake up in the morning, it feels like I’ve just been with you, the phantom touch of your hand on the back of my neck fresh and not imagined? That I can feel your skin against mine, and it makes every bone in my body ache? That, for a few moments, I can hold my breath and be back there with you, in a dream, in a thousand rooms, nowhere at all? I think perhaps Hamilton said it better in a letter to Eliza: You engross my thoughts too intirely to allow me to think of any thing else—you not only employ my mind all day; but you intrude upon my sleep. I meet you in every dream—and when I wake I cannot close my eyes again for ruminating on your sweetness. If you did decide to take the option mentioned at the start of this email, I do hope you haven’t read the rest of this rubbish. Regards, Haplessly Romantic Heretic Prince Henry the Utterly Daft

McQuiston, Casey. Red, White & Royal Blue: A Novel (pp. 241-243). St. Martin's Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Re: A mass of fools and knaves A agcd@eclare45.com                8/10/20 5:36 AM to Henry H, Please don’t be stupid. No part of any of this will ever be uncomplicated. Anyway, you should be a writer. You are a writer. Even after all this, I still always feel like I want to know more of you. Does that sound crazy? I just sit here and wonder, who is this person who knows stuff about Hamilton and writes like this? Where does someone like that even come from? How was I so wrong? It’s weird because I always know things about people, gut feelings that usually lead me in more or less the right direction. I do think I got a gut feeling with you, I just didn’t have what I needed in my head to understand it. But I kind of kept chasing it anyway, like I was just going blindly in a certain direction and hoping for the best. I guess that makes you the North Star? I wanna see you again and soon. I keep reading that one paragraph over and over again. You know which one. I want you back here with me. I want your body and I want the rest of you too. And I want to get the fuck out of this house. Watching June and Nora on TV doing appearances without me is torture. We have this annual thing at my dad’s lake house in Texas. Whole long weekend off the grid. There’s a lake with a pier, and my dad always cooks something fucking amazing. You wanna come? I kind of can’t stop thinking about you all sunburned and pretty sitting out there in the country. It’s the weekend after next. If Shaan can talk to Zahra or somebody about flying you into Austin, we can pick you up from there. Say yes? Yrs, Alex P.S. Allen Ginsberg to Peter Orlovsky—1958: Tho I long for the actual sunlight contact between us I miss you like a home. Shine back honey & think of me.

McQuiston, Casey. Red, White & Royal Blue: A Novel (pp. 243-245). St. Martin's Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Re: A mass of fools and knaves Henry hwales@kensingtonemail.com                8/10/20 8:22 PM to A Alex, If I’m north, I shudder to think where in God’s name we’re going. I’m ruminating on identity and your question about where a person like me comes from, and as best as I can explain it, here’s a story: Once, there was a young prince who was born in a castle. His mother was a princess scholar, and his father was the most handsome, feared knight in all the land. As a boy, people would bring him everything he could ever dream of wanting. The most beautiful silk clothes, ripe fruit from the orangery. At times, he was so happy, he felt he would never grow tired of being a prince. He came from a long, long line of princes, but never before had there been a prince quite like him: born with his heart on the outside of his body. When he was small, his family would smile and laugh and say he would grow out of it one day. But as he grew, it stayed where it was, red and visible and alive. He didn’t mind it very much, but every day, the family’s fear grew that the people of the kingdom would soon notice and turn their backs on the prince. His grandmother, the queen, lived in a high tower, where she spoke only of the other princes, past and present, who were born whole. Then, the prince’s father, the knight, was struck down in battle. The lance tore open his armor and his body and left him bleeding in the dust. And so, when the queen sent new clothes, armor for the prince to parcel his heart away safe, the prince’s mother did not stop her. For she was afraid, now: afraid of her son’s heart torn open too. So the prince wore it, and for many years, he believed it was right. Until he met the most devastatingly gorgeous peasant boy from a nearby village who said absolutely ghastly things to him that made him feel alive for the first time in years and who turned out to be the most mad sort of sorcerer, one who could conjure up things like gold and vodka shots and apricot tarts out of absolutely nothing, and the prince’s whole life went up in a puff of dazzling purple smoke, and the kingdom said, “I can’t believe we’re all so surprised.” I’m in for the lake house. I must admit, I’m glad you’re getting out of the house. I worry you may burn the thing down. Does this mean I’ll be meeting your father? I miss you. x Henry P.S. This is mortifying and maudlin and, honestly, I hope you forget it as soon as you’ve read it. P.P.S. From Henry James to Hendrik C. Andersen, 1899: May the terrific U.S.A. be meanwhile not a brute to you. I feel in you a confidence, dear Boy–which to show is a joy to me. My hopes and desires and sympathies right heartily and most firmly, go with you. So keep up your heart, and tell me, as it shapes itself, your (inevitably, I imagine, more or less weird) American story. May, at any rate, tutta quella gente be good to you.

McQuiston, Casey. Red, White & Royal Blue: A Novel (pp. 245-247). St. Martin's Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.