#workplace misogyny

[thatbadadvice]

Help! I'm a Perfect Genius, but This Potential Employer Asked Me a Boring Interview Question!

Ask A Manager, 13 Feb 2024:

I was rejected from a role for not answering an interview question. I had all the skills they asked for, and the recruiter and hiring manager loved me. I had a final round of interviews — a peer on the hiring team, a peer from another team that I would work closely with, the director of both teams (so my would-be grandboss, which I thought was weird), and then finally a technical test with the hiring manager I had already spoken to. (I don’t know if it matters but I’m male and everyone I interviewed with was female.) The interviews went great, except the grandboss. I asked why she was interviewing me since it was a technical position and she was clearly some kind of middle manager. She told me she had a technical background (although she had been in management 10 years so it’s not like her experience was even relevant), but that she was interviewing for things like communication, ability to prioritize, and soft skills. I still thought it was weird to interview with my boss’s boss. She asked pretty standard (and boring) questions, which I aced. But then she asked me to tell her about the biggest mistake I’ve made in my career and how I handled it. I told her I’m a professional and I don’t make mistakes, and she argued with me! She said everyone makes mistakes, but what matters is how you handle them and prevent the same mistake from happening in the future. I told her maybe she made mistakes as a developer but since I actually went to school for it, I didn’t have that problem. She seemed fine with it and we moved on with the interview. A couple days later, the recruiter emailed me to say they had decided to go with someone else. I asked for feedback on why I wasn’t chosen and she said there were other candidates who were stronger. I wrote back and asked if the grandboss had been the reason I didn’t get the job, and she just told me again that the hiring panel made the decision to hire someone else. I looked the grandboss up on LinkedIn after the rejection and she was a developer at two industry leaders and then an executive at a third. She was also connected to a number of well-known C-level people in our city and industry. I’m thinking of mailing her on LinkedIn to explain why her question was wrong and asking if she’ll consider me for future positions at her company but my wife says it’s a bad idea. What do you think about me mailing her to try to explain?

Sir,

You have been wronged in the most grievous of ways by a coven of retaliatory, self-aggrandizing women who have failed in the extreme to recognize your brilliance, your talent, and above all, your general superiority.

Of course you should mail this mediocre "grandboss" on LinkedIn to inform her of the deep offense she caused you by interviewing you in the first place, let alone doing so using a boring question — indeed, you have a moral and professional obligation to do so in order to preserve your honor and the honor of scores of men like you who have never done a single solitary thing wrong in their lives, ever.

But I beg you to consider doing more. A single, private message to one incompetent bitch may not convey to the necessary parties the depth and breadth of the situation. Many, many people have important lessons to learn from your experience, and I encourage you to share it widely. Consider making a public LinkedIn post, and ensure that it is shareable across platforms. Depending on your financial resources, a billboard with your name, professional headshot, and contact information could go a long way toward ensuring that everyone in your industry who needs to know just how you handled the way these women treated you, does know about it. I hope that in your continuing job search, you are able to connect with potential employers who have a much better grasp of all you bring to the table.

[clericsparrow]

Something I've noticed throughout various retail jobs I've worked is the difference in how staff are treated by management based on gender. Even when management are female, I still notice that more is expected out of women than men. The men get away with not pulling their weight, meanwhile a woman will simply stop and ask her coworker how her weekend was and get scolded for talking and told to get back to work. Men can get away with barely even looking at customers they're serving, whereas women will be perfectly polite and friendly, but get told off for not smiling enough. I've seen male coworkers get promoted despite literally doing nothing but fuck around with other men we work with all day, meanwhile, their female coworkers end up picking up their slack. If they don't, then they're usually getting blamed for stuff not getting done because management expect so much more out of women than they do men.

An example I can think of is the time I had two coworkers who liked to go out partying all the time. Management thought the man coming in hungover and late to every shift was endearing. He never got reprimanded for it. Even when he'd show up two hours late it was okay because "that's just what he's like!" Meanwhile, the female coworker who went out partying would show up on time, be a little hungover but would still do anything that was asked of her, and she was always presentable. Yeah, she got fired for coming in hungover.

Or another one I remember is when a male coworker was on extended sick leave. Management were so worried for him and constantly checking in to make sure he was doing well. A female coworker got diagnosed with a neurological condition and needed some time off work while she adjusted to her medication. She was called dramatic, attention seeking, and no one bothered to check in with how she was doing.

Even on our breaks we aren't free from these weird double standards. I always got snide comments about eating processed food on my break. I'd constantly have people in my ear saying it's bad for me and told I would ruin my body if I kept eating like that (ironically I had a restrictive eating disorder at the time, so I was damaging my body, just not really in the way they were thinking I was). Most of my male coworkers would have eaten similar things, but no one made any comments on their dietary choices.

It's just so insane to me that people pretend that workplace misogyny is a thing of the past, when it very clearly isn't. Male mediocrity gets celebrated, while hard working women never get any recognition.

[nerdby]

I found one of my favorite movies on Hulu.

The Devil Wears Prada.

I'm kinda really insecure about admitting how much I like the movie because my ex said that having an interest in fashion made me seem shallow. And I don't like worship fashion designers or anything. I mean, it'd be cool to own designer clothes and stuff just cause....Well, the only designer anything I've ever owned was pair of like Sketchers or whatever. The entire time I've lived on my own the most I've ever paid for a single piece of clothing was that wasn't sneakers was $80USD.

But what I like about fashion is just the psychological aspects of color theory and self-expression through clothing. And what I like about the movie is that its a commentary on workplace misogyny and how fucked up it is that people assume women who are business leaders must be pure evil whereas male business leaders are perceived as charismatic and charming.

Jfc, I wish I knew how to explain this without sounding like a fucking bootlicker.

Anyway, I'm gonna try to watch it tonight for the first time in years so....Wish me luck or whatever.

[littlesistersti]

The fascinating part is when she said one of the reasons why they’re best friends is when she told him of his faults (regarding the workplace sexism) he listened to her and improved himself. Compare that to their boss when told of this problem.

Ps. Read her Pinkwashing article, semi-sequel or slice of life (but it’s not pretty) of the above article

[blorbocedes]

nico: we shouldn't be complaining. we have the air con right on us, it's pretty awesome 😊

crofty: we can FEEL the WARMTH coming off you. you're like a Pirelli tyre that's just done a qualifying session 🥵

nico: ... 🧍

helppp why did crofty just say nico's an omega in heat... what is this workplace nico has to endure during commentary 😣😖

[the-owl-tree]

"can women have children and a career? erin hunter, author of a long running book series aimed at children, boldly declares for the fifth time in the series: no."

[feelingemotjons]

Seriously fuck mr beast and anyone who still defends him. There are no “good” or “nice” rich people. Mr beast doesn’t actually give a fuck about people nor care for them as much as he claims he does. I really hope he does not get away with this shit because this is not okay

[gonzofromspace]

came to tumblr for some quality rivals content and all I'm seeing is Declan thirst posts i love an 80s stache as must as the next guy so I can forgive it and people genuinely very pro taggie x rupert

on my hands and knees begging for someone to talk about Lizzie or Maud in that last episode

[magicalgrimm]

I’m honestly pretty surprised that nobody’s made a mouthwashing AU where Anya confides in daisuke because I feel like if there’s anyone on that ship who would’ve protect her it probably would’ve been the youngest guy there who’s more interested in newer ways of thinking (at least I’m assuming liberalism is on the rise in this universe like it is here).

[midnightbrightside]

It is my firm belief that the Kristoph wears shirts that are too big him to hide his snatched waist.

I totally believe like John Melaney, he’s got them feminine hips, so wears clothes that don’t fit so he can be “taken seriously”

He makes himself look ugly cause he’s too afraid and insecure to be the pretty little bitch he is

kristoph gavin is the first man to experience misogyny in the workplace so true

[blorbocedes]

Blorbie I have a question about Nico because I’m still trying to learn all the lore and something I’ve noticed is that there were (and still are) lots of Lewis fans who like to claim that Nico was fairly disliked by the rest of the grid during his time in the sport and I feel like that’s easily disputable and I’d love your thoughts. I saw this post** and was quickly like ‘huh…’ because I’d not really looked into those claims further before but surely the fact that like half the grid constantly shared flights with him means they were friendly, no? I mean sure you could argue they just wanted free flights but everyone seemed to get along with him just fine, it seemed he was definitely involved in the banter and everything from the videos he posted during that time. I also noticed from scrolling back years that he seemed to be one of the few drivers who Kimi usually laughed with, Jenson was obviously good friends with him, I always got the sense Daniel got on really well with him and despite what sewis fans might have people believe, I always thought Seb liked him too. So is this just another example of the LH fans agendas going unchecked and taken as gospel? Did I simply fall victim to the anti-Nico propaganda? ����

** https://www.tumblr.com/sweetpeapoppy/685938060693749760

did you fall victim to propaganda? yeah lol.

there's presscon pictures of nico looking 😶😐 while lewis and seb are giggling, probably bc nico has been asked for the 30th time that day if he enjoys losing to lewis/does he have it in him to beat him, and people extrapolate off that, that nico is a no fun frigid bitch (unlike the fun loving 4x wdc german seb) who everyone hated, cause he was too busy being jealous and evil. and mind you, this is a narrative that was peddled by sky as well, the cold clinical unfeeling numbers obsessed German, and so a lot of people's 2016 recollections is skewed by this

gif by @teandkimi

there you go. the power of narratives!

and the context to these photos

[erebusvincent]

This reminds me of a post I saw about hoping the outcome of the election takes us back to 1863, when women didn’t have to work.

Women absolutely worked in 1863, you unmitigated moron. Insane that women today are ignorant of the fact that women not working was limited to the upper class throughout history and is a recent invention for everyone else to justify kicking women out of the workforce post-WWII.

Also there was a fairly famous war going on that year.

[bitchesgetriches]

S3 E11 "People treat me like a child because I'm femme. How do I command the respect I deserve?"

Want the transcript? We got your transcript right here!

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[lesbiancolumbo]

if you’ve ever “wondered” why i get on such a soapbox about industry sexism, consider that my entire career in that field which was not short i never had any creative or higher-ranking positions that paid well, because every time i advocated for/applied for one they gave it to a man over me, and in more than one instance it was the man i literally mentored. so.

[girderednerve]

Another blow [to Eula Bingham's OSHA] came after the revelation that the American Cyanamid Company had insisted that female workers of childbearing age at its chemical plant in Willow Island, West Virginia, be sterilized or face termination. Was the company's twisted way of protecting fetuses against lead released during certain processes. Betty Moler was among five women in the plant's pigments division coerced into having the procedure, called laparoscopic tubal sterilization, in which the fallopian tubes are sealed to prevent fertilization of the egg. "I remember everything about it, to the hour," Moler told the Chicago Tribune. "On January 30, 1978, they called us into the medical department. I even remember the time: 3:30 p.m." The plant's manager, doctor, and nurse briefed the women on what they euphemistically called "Band-Aid" or "belly-button" surgery. Moler tried to talk her way out of it, explaining that her husband had already had a vasectomy. The company people were unmoved, arguing that she still could get pregnant. Moler had the procedure, which did not go smoothly. Promised she'd spend one day in the hospital, she stayed six....

Bingham saw the Cyanamid policy for what it was: illegal discrimination and an abdication of responsibility. OSHA cited the company for violating the general duty clause of the Occupational Safety and Health Act, a catchall provision inserted in the law because Congress knew it would be impossible for OSHA to issue a standard on every conceivable hazard. The company contested the citation administratively and in court, winning both times. Judge Robert Bork, then on the DC Circuit Court of Appeals and later a failed US Supreme Court nominee, and two colleagues held that the sterilization policy was not a hazard under the act. Any harm the women experienced came from "economic and social factors which operate primarily outside the workplace," Bork wrote in the circuit court's unanimous opinion. "Were we to decide otherwise, we would have to adopt a broad principle of unforeseeable scope" that could beget limitless liability for employers. Legal experts and labor leaders denounced this narrow interpretation of the statute, saying it would keep OSHA from addressing transplacental poisons and otherwise hobble the agency. In 1983, Cyanamid settled for $200,000 a lawsuit brought by the American Civil LIberties Union on behalf of the women who'd been sterilized and seven others who were transferred or demoted after refusing to undergo the procedure.

Jim Morris, Cancer Factory: Industrial Chemicals, Corporate Deception, and the Hidden Deaths of American Workers (2024), Chapter 8

[stillsuchathing]

Leveraging misogyny to cover up sexual harassment

First, start with the man who presented himself as an advocate for emotionally healthy men and masculinity - this is from 2023 sit-down with 'The Tamron Hall Show':

Justin Baldoni’s Mission to Redefine Masculinity in Modern Times

Then fast forward to the pre release marketing for the film adaptation of Colleen Hoover's novel It Ends With Us, produced and directed by Baldoni. From What Happened on the Set of ‘It Ends With Us’?, posted on August 8, 2024:

A TikToker discovered that Lively, Jenny Slate, et al no longer follow Baldoni on Instagram, and fans have noticed that he’s been absent from all of the press appearances with the cast. Any promotion he has done has been by himself.

Social media scrutiny and speculation started the conversation. Misogyny and engagement shaped the conversation to target Blake Lively as the reason for the on-set issues. From But does it end with a win?, posted on August 13, 2024:

...but literally all the women involved in the project, and even a woman who isn’t involved in the project but who knows both Blake and Justin (Liz Plank), are not f-cking with this man. Which in any other circumstance is a red flag, right?! But not here. Here people are pointing to Blake’s florals and her haircare line and the way she’s been talking about the movie and supposedly not raising awareness about domestic violence, and labelling her the big villain. What makes this situation different? 

Lively was targeted in such a way that people eager to remember their grievances against her previous missteps added to the chorus. A bombardment that took factual information (cast members not following Baldoni online) and spun it into a disparagement campaign.

So the movie is a hit - via The Hollywood Reporter....

Box Office Milestone: ‘It Ends With Us’ Is Top-Grossing Romantic Drama Since 2018’s ‘A Star is Born’ The film adaptation of Colleen Hoover's bestselling book about a woman who reclaims her life after ending an abusive marriage has amassed more than $300M in global ticket sales.

....while Lively had to deal with her character and reputation being attacked. Via Guardian:

For weeks, she was eviscerated online by millions on TikTok, X and Instagram – by some for failing to grasp the film’s message about the cycle of domestic violence (and simultaneously promoting her haircare line and her husband, Ryan Reynolds’ gin brand), but by many, many more for simply giving off bad vibes. There was always something off about her, they concurred.

Eventually the hyper scrutiny and targeting did die down as news orgs, engagement and misogyny trolls moved on to the next story. Another marker of how culture targets women for existing for themselves.

And then on December 21, the NY Times story announces that Lively filled a legal complaint alleging sexual harassment, hostile workplace and a retaliation campaign.

‘We Can Bury Anyone’: Inside a Hollywood Smear Machine Private messages detail an alleged campaign to tarnish Blake Lively after she accused Justin Baldoni of misconduct on the set of “It Ends With Us.”

NY Times: I’ve Seen Celebrity P.R. Tactics at Work. Blake Lively Is Not Alone.

Vox: The latest chapter of It Ends With Us is an alleged Blake Lively smear campaign

Reddit: “it’s disturbing that these huge pr firms can keep betting on misogyny and ultimately win.”

Defector: The Narrative Is All That Matters

Jezebel: Despite Adams and the NYPD’s best attempts to frame themselves as the heroes by staging Mangione’s perp walk, the spectacle only served to further iconize him.

NY Times: We Can Bury Anyone’: Inside a Hollywood Smear Machine

Unbothered: When Black Celebs Get Pregnant, They Don’t Need Your Opinion

Marie Claire: Blake Lively, Misogyny & The Need For Nuance

NY Magazine: 'Spiegelman is a self-described revenge fetishist.'

MSNBC: 'There’s much to be said about the lack of protections for women, regardless of stature and resources, in a society that spends so much time disparaging and mistreating them.'