#worked on this for THREE DAYS YAY
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIEBREENNNNNN!!! <3
Also if you haven't already, you should give me a follow on bsky. Since, y'know. Tumblr hates artists :'D
#azyrsart#sigma ow#sigma fanart#overwatch fanart#its the birthday boy#worked on this for THREE DAYS YAY
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Another trade/ collab this time a crossover between @cookieruma29 ‘s vengeful Evan AU and into the ballpit AU✨
#honestly imagine transferring trauma to your bestie from another universe#just brutal#five nights at freddy's#fnaf security breach#fnaf#fnaf 4#Michael afton#evan afton#crying child#gregory fnaf#uhhhhhhhhhhh????#oh#into the ballpit au#wanda#my art#and her art#yay#anyway y’all will def try to have that next page done before next week HOPEFULLY since I have three days off#from work#which is nice
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Bard dance 🎶
#baldur's gate 3#astarion#tavstarion#bg3#karlach#shadowheart#gale dekarios#tavgale#halsin#wyll ravengard#lae'zel#my art#HAPPY PATCH 6 DAY GUYS!!!#i’m at work and can’t play bUT YAY#I love bard dance#the three tieflings are my and my partner’s tavs#Gabi the warlock#Robin the bard#Ozzie the Dark Urge#the one pink vitiligo tiefling near wyll#he’s baby#i will probably post more about him ehehehh
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The Crane Wives (The Garden) and Malevolent are a great combo, I should have done this sooner…
I wanted to include more stuff from s4 and s5, hence starting with s5 Arthur, but I always overestimate how much I can fit in a minute. But know the intention was there. Maybe I’ll do another at some point, but not any time soon I’m burnt out for animation. But I love these guys so I’ll probably be back eventually. It’s just how it has to be.
#malevolent#malevolent fanart#malevolent podcast#my posts of madness#arthur lester#john doe malevolent#malevolent animation#malevolent animatic#arthur lester malevolent#arthur malevolent#john malevolent#I went waaay out of my comfort zone for a lot of this#so yay for learning new things?? not yay for my sanity#this was 10 days of work which honestly isn’t bad#I expected to be done three days ago but that’s okay#kayne malevolent#animation#John doe#I am genuinely sooo fucking happy with this#I’m winning#I do think the first half of the garden fits them better or like the whole song#but I really wanted that end part and my motivation DOES NOT last that long#I know what I’m like#artists on tumblr#I just love this podcast sooo much#excuse my inconsistency it’s been a while since I animated I had to get back in the groove#okay I’m done yapping now
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I sewed my first pair of pants this morning!!
huge thanks to my mom who let me watch her make a pair first, got both chimera falin cosplay pants done now!! slowly getting this thing finished
#ramblings#my pics#cosplay#got three ten hour work days in a row yay#then surgery at 6am the next morning#yaaayyyyyy#super minor surgery but a SURGERY AAAAAA
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Still no craft updates on account of I feel Bad* but I did get like half a beanie crocheted this weekend? I also have a bat that's haunting me. In that there's a bat design I desperately want to turn into a plushie not in that I am being literally haunted by a bat. As far as I know I am not haunted by a bat but to be fair I'm not confident I'd know? *my heart rate got high enough that made me cough but my asthma was flaring up enough that cough launched me into an asthma attack, which raised my heart rate even more, so basically I used my emergency inhaler and then was on the floor for a while. Feels bad! Do not recommend. I'm okay though just tired
#the person behind the yarn#the reason my heart rate got that high is that my pulse pressure was very narrow#which is. you know. bad.#so I finally gave in and took an extra dose of my meds (as my doctor has advised in the past)#what is probably happening is that I reached the point of stressed where my body couldn't cope#(I'm on long term steroids so I need stress doses if I get too stressed)#but! because acute stress can trigger an allergic reaction (yay MCAS) I tend to kinda...shunt stress off to the side#and come back to process it when it's less like. urgent? immediate?#when it no longer feels like it will trigger an MCAS flareup if I acknowledge the feeling exists#and I do go back and process those emotions! I just have to get a little distance first#and the work stress lately has been so unrelenting (combined with the like...general world news stress)#that I have been ignoring my own stress levels so hard I genuinely did not think I was stressed#or that I needed a stress dose of my meds but uh. I was wrong!#I was wrong. Good news is now that I know I should be good in a day or two#doc said three days for stress doses and today was day one#bad news is narrow pulse pressure combined with asthma attack feels Very Bad!#very bad indeed took me like 20-30 minutes and two different kinds of medication before I could talk normally#without having to pause and catch my breath midsentence#every time I start thinking 'you know maybe I'm not really disabled maybe my health stuff is under control'#it pops up like a jack in the box like surprise! it's the same thing again still here! the meds just hide it most of the time#but it's still there :) lurking :) when I least expect it :)#...I think I might buy myself another sticker or two. something to look forward to coming in the mail
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joined a local choir and ah, singing with other people is just so fun and nice and beautiful <3
#hope i can still find time for this when i'll eventually be employed again;;;#being unemployed has been so good for my hobbies and social life and it's been so nice;;;#im split inbetween “i should put more effort into finding a new job” and “i should enjoy this time and invest in myself instead of rushing#back to work which will take away the majority of my free time again. we only live as short as we do after all“#anyways! yay! choir!! the last time i sang in a choir is over 4 years ago and still in highschool and we were like. 6 people.#and now we are so many more and we sing songs that i like more and ahhh#im. so socially awkward. sometimes. but singing (with others) always makes me feel at ease#next weekend we'll have some kind of training camp (i feel like in a sports anime lmao) so i wont be as active during that time i guess!!#im looking forward to it so much <3 but. not so much to leaving the house at 7am for three days in a row bc. im not a 7am person;;#chroms ramblings
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girl who wanted to watch sooo many movies this week because her work schedule was finally normal again but can’t even make it through bottoms tonight
#theoretically i could have finished it by now but i wanted to give her my full attention…..#anyway. finished my dinner of an apple two pieces of pita bread warmed up in the toaster and three of these little pepperoni and cheese#things i had the other day and wasn’t a fan of so i figured if i threw up again i would only be ruining a food i didn’t care that much for#they were actually fine this time though i 100% overcooked them last time#me when i can’t even cook pre made frozen food….#in many ways me being bad at cooking and cleaning is feminism. in many other ways it’s just a terrible red flag#and now i have work at 8am tomorrow. ew#it was SUPPOSED to be 10 but i’m bad at saying no when they ask me to come early#cuz like. i can… i just don’t want to…#if bestie coworker manager starts pissing me off tomorrow though i’m going to scream. love her but she sometimes is a lot#bestie bestie coworker will be there too though. yay :)#she’s the one who i said we had a sort of xena and gabrielle dynamic but like not in a gay way. unless… no but it’s not fr
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RANT
#hey boss#u uh- u said i was working sun n wed- can i have more consistent days so i have days to block out for interviews?#.#uve been forewarned#ok so its four months into my gap year and HOLY SHIT JOB SEARCHING IS SO FRUSTRATING#so im working as a clerk at this law firm mon and wed (only 8 hours total tho)#n i THOT i had my reatil job in the bag but then boss goes “yea im really sorry but i cant give u three days - only sundays and weds”#so i was like great ok i need another job thats cool ill just bliock out sundays and weds for potential employers#THEN on sat boss texts n goes “ahhh i dont need u till next week- also can u switch ur wed to fri”. ??????? MA'AM#so i go#she says sorry kid i dont WHICH IS FINE I APPRICIATE THE COMMUNICATION#so i have an interview the next day at a coffee shop for a time THE MANAGER OFFERED#i show up after having pit my day aside for this noon interview#i walk in employees go “uh ho manager stepped out”#she camnt come back for the rest of the day AND doesnt apologize in her email- just “unfourntallyyyy i didnt have time to check my email”#MAAM YOU SEND THE INVITE#whatever#luckily last friday i was invited to this job fair by like four diff locations in san fran n was immeditaly hired#(first trial shift tmr yay!)#but the commute is gonna be KILLER#however im hopeful n i love coffee so yay#also my pet sitting is taking off ive got two sits booked for october#which is suprising bc im also traveling for half the month#manchester edenbrough st andrews milan lake como babayyyyyyy#also this thursday im heading to chicago and maine for a wedding (yay go love!) and to tenessee for another wedding in jan#so now ive got law firm retail associate barista dog sitter n i just KNOW when the holidays roll around n both retail jobs will be wack ill#be floored#but. ahem anywats good things frustrating thinsg stressful things but GOD am i glad i took this gap year#oh yea and ive been hiking tones! lands end trail#tilden park
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almost went to the hospital again earlier this evening 🙃 i am extremely scared that this entire time i thought i was improving, i was actually just getting as bad as the beginning. genuinely i have no idea what is going on with my body. right now my heart is relatively calm but im still shaking, my eyes feel sunken, and my chest has this tension that refuses to leave and wont let me 'calm'.
#jrnlsht#lets hope i pass out and sleep enough for work tomorrow#day three of difficulty sleeping yay#I think i have gotten maybe five hours of sleep a night max#and most of that is from like 2am-6am
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did just buy 3 sets of sneakers b/c they were having a sale? yes
#:)#yay#to be fair its been like ...three years since i bought sneakers#except for my new balances that i got last year that i wear to work almost every single day lmao#blue rambles
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Happy things day 28
• tree is decorated! Got to do it with the whole fam, with my grandma watching and pointing out gaps we’d missed ❤️
• went to the gym with Mom. I actually Loathe my gym but Walking Fast felt nice today
• the sun came out for a bit today! I live in the Dreariest Place Known To Man so it was relief
• got something crossed off my to-do list that I’ve been kind of overwhelmed by
• practiced that Hard Song again. Don't feel like I made progress :/ first rehearsal is tomorrow and I definitely don’t need it perfect by then, but I think I have a good enough working knowledge of this song to at least know what I’m doing tomorrow.
#Happy posting#another extremely hard day#Yay OCD! Yay grief that’s sinking in!#I cried three separate times today#Once on a work zoom call which I’m actually kind of embarrassed about#But also. It shows my coworkers and manager that I am Not Okay right now so hopefully if something comes up and I do need to take time off#They’ll understand? 😬
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good morning!! <33
#yay breakfast day :3#mm other than that gonna relax today#like yesterday i didn't feel great so I'm gonna take it easy today :3#anyways i'll work more on building dan heng il#+ i wanna watch the memories i don't have for l+ds (like the two promise ones (the event ends today) + zayne's recent one)#as for the card leveling i am now down to three to get up to lvl 55#and i can use some of my stamina mats before they expire today so maybe i could get another card up there?? :3#then i can start saving to do more deepspace trials with the cards#anyways i hope today/tonight is kind to you!! <333#morning rambles
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Growing up w a mom who both wants to talk to you about all of her feelings but also somehow doesn’t know how to talk about your feelings but also she’s your best friend and also she’s done so much for you but she ruins your day constantly and you love her but you haven’t told her that in months when she says she loves you you say “yeah” and walk away and she’s sick and you’ve been asking her every time you get up if she needs anything if she wants the bong packed if she needs water food whatever and then the one time I’m nauseous making food for myself (eating for the first time today at one pm) she leans into the kitchen and asks me to make her scrambled eggs and I said no maybe after I eat and she said okay and then went back into her room and then I took my food and went into my room and was just eating when she came into my room to yell at me and cry about me not ever helping her and I said no I can cook after I eat a little I was nauseas and she was just like [yelled through tears] no I’m making myself toast you don’t need to do anything for me! And slammed my bedroom door and went loudly crying across the house and now I’m just in my room like oh okay 👍 thanks ! So I might go to the library for a bit maybe and listen to my mommy issues playlist on the way there and sob
#lol! okay sure this might as well be how my day goes today sure#no cause she made me feel so fucking awful that I didn’t immediately fucking bend to her will it’s insane the guilt this woman can lay on#i said I haven’t eaten yet today she immediately said ‘ I haven’t eaten in three days I weigh ___ (low number for her bc she’s always keepin#me in the loop on her weight cause that helps raise children with normal relationships to themselves and their own weight#anyways#yeah !! yipppe !! and I was on the phone with my girlfriend and she had to fucking listen to my mom yell at me !!!#apparently she deafened but idk when she did but I have to feel bad about that too cause my mom yelling triggered 📞 and made her anxiety#spike and she wanted to go lay down for a while and I’m just like pissed off in my room and it’s soooo fucking annoying#I think I’m gonna just finish my Mac and cheese cup and pack up my coloring book and my iPad and go drive and check the ashtrays first maybe#I need tobacco after that I feel like I was doing good I haven’t smoked tobacco in two days I think so yay but after that. I want a bowl and#I don’t have that much rn#whatever I could make it work without the ashtrays and I could just like. stop going.#I could have self control if I wanted to. hmm… we shall see.
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Five espresso shots a day keeps the mental illness away
#bad migraine today and also sleep deprivation and also cramps. not a good combo#i had an espresso shot to keep me awake#I was okay for about half a class period but then it rlly started kicking in and my eyes did the thing where they shake back and forth and#won’t focus so I was like okay. fuck#the migraine started kicking in I mean#and then I started going a little crazy from all the stuff and I was muttering the whole time and my thoughts weren’t being comprehensible#so I went and got three more espresso shots for my migraine and sleep deprivation#and ibuprofen and food and tea for the cramps#and that helped my eyes work and my mind settle down#and then I got home and didn’t want to freak my mom out so I had another espresso shot#yay#but I’m at my dads now and I’m gonna sleep or smth#owen chronicles#brian.#I’m not always the most sane person. it rlly depends on the day. some days I’m fine and some days I talk to myself in a way that sounds like#nonsense to anyone else#but the coffee helps
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Your watercolor piece is so BEAUTIFUL!!! its so hard to see fanart of traditional media and you absolutely *ate* with that one 🥹 the colors are so delicate and i love all the white space you left in between
aaaaa thank you!! always happy to see people be excited about traditional art :D
#asks#rebelwithoutabroom#honestly always makes my day when people get excited about seeing fanart done traditionally#Im gonna rant a moment in the tags now since Ive seen a few people bring up the composition and all that#I was!!! very much influenced by old illustrations to the OG three musketeers#and also very much inspired by the works of the illustrators of the golden age of illustration#(I got to see some harry clarke pieces in person so I kinda went digging thru it)#I was actually about to ditch the entire idea at one point!#really liked the thought of it but not the execution#so I looked thru all these classic artists of the golden age#and then picked up my antique artbook of ludwig richter (his art is really lovely go look him up)#and while going thru the pages I kinda just realised that oh yeah I can just. fake the background#the side alley with the arches is a bit of a weakness of mine#whenever Im on holiday and see one I have to take pictures#I did actually do an illustration in a very similar setting with a similar angle last summer#so I decided to put it down on paper and hey. not bad#I really enjoyed painting this one I like how soft the watercolours came out#it actually looks like watercolour this time! yay!#(I say to myself demeaningly because I aspire to paint like luděk marold one day)#but yes the archway of the alley kinda forms a frame around dream and george#and then you have sapnap breaking it by his fall and his stuff scattered on the floor Outside the frame#all while george is stepping out of the frame to pursue him and dream clutching his arm like 'baby no :((('#and the very light ivy clinging to the wall calls back to the ornate frames of flowers that were used in illustration a lot#i need to do more of these. I really hope to tbh#I had a really good time painting this one#Ive had a really good time painting in general as of late. missed this
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