#with some realistic development? i guess??
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I AM still writing! I promise!! It's just slow, at least to me it feels slow.
I really do prefer writing an entire story first before posting it anywhere so that no one has to suffer through my writer's block.
The fic being referenced in the picture is my current child that I've been working on. It's been about 8-9 months of active writing excluding the month of no progress. I'm still trying to convince myself it was a much needed break instead of chalking it up to writer's block LOL 😂
But y'all...whoo wee is it a fun one!
If you're into stories that follow the administration side of the Naruto world without it going to deep, this is the one for you.
I am also trying to rework May I Draw You in a way that I actually like it because losing it to the Google Void made me realize I did not like the direction it was going. I might keep some major elements of what I had or just change it up all together but keep the same artist x Madara pairing. We'll see what happens!
#update#admin den chat#i feel really bad for disappearing but i have gift!!#my gift is this long fic that i have really REALLY enjoyed writing#apparently slow burns scratch a writing itch i didn't know i had#it's strangers to lovers#with some realistic development? i guess??#it seems realistic to me at least
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I wish more people would weigh out the demand of how "realistic" something is regarding horror media thats supposed to be around a certain time era or within certain limitations with the fact that if it WERE 100% accurate to what it's trying to represent, it'd probably be lame as hell.
#I've seen this complaint a lot with N64 replicated horror lately since that's been a popular... genre I guess?#'the console isn't capable of that/the devs wouldn't do that realistically because it would run bad'#Yes but consider: the game you are currently playing would lose so much value as a HORROR game if it took all of that away#Like I'm gonna keep it a stack with you. If you are playing a horror game of any kind you're already breaking the laws of reality#have some fun with it instead of nitpicking the fact that it isn't console accurate because duh#I do not think any developer goes into a console replica game with the intent to make it accurate.#They go in with the intent to make it an experience and should be judged on that merit#And sometimes I feel they do it good (Shipwrecked) or bad (Crow64 I hate your game so much)#TLDR: devs don't typically make replica horror games with the intent to be accurate they do it with the intent to be a horror game#edit: if there's a suspension of disbelief with fnaf all the time with walking non possessed sentient animatronics#I don't know why it becomes an issue when the N64 starts playing videos
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a large amount of time I've been spending on -untitled undefined scope original fiction project- since the last time I posted about it has been trying to develop the protagonist concept I came up with last summer or whatever into like, a character that would feel real and era appropriate.
it's fun research to do. naturally a lot of the details I assigned to her are things that I already think are cool, so it's been a lot of fun trying to trace her traits back through the relatively recent past, getting reminded of how much things have changed, or where the gaps in my intuition are, and then doing a flurry of reading to get a sense for exactly how someone like her and the people around her could have happened and what her life was probably like leading up to her present day. hopefully this results in some good good verisimilitude.
#I wrote a short story from her perspective over the holidays and then didn't know how to continue it#and then I got distracted by real life stuff for a few months#I forget if I posted about that#and then I've been picking through archive dot org for the last few weeks looking at this stuff#the last big rabbit hole was trying to get a better feel for era appropriate ts/tv subculture#the current one I'm looking at is how she would've gotten into language learning and how that would've worked#nettle has been prodding me about the setting thing lately so I've been thinking about that more too#probably the biggest hurdle by far is figuring out how I want to play that#and how I want the thing to be divided up#since the original coc scenario I'm developing this out of is centered on a flight from LA to honolulu#and the airport dungeon was definitely meant to be a hook for a larger campaign#some amount of it is going to cover protag lady's failed life in LA and some of it is going to be worse things happening in hawaii#but it's like. how much do I want to balance it one way or the other#and realistically how much does the aesthetics of 20th century air travel add to the story#besides me personally thinking it's compelling ofc#a lot of what I find compelling about hawaii is that it's an east/west cultural crossroads and realistically that's also true of socal#and I can wax poetic about socal as much as I want without worrying all that much about mishandling something#and there's also a lot of socal specific history along similar parallels to pull from that I'm more familiar with#I guess it comes down to whether curiosity re: 'doing it right' is enough of a motivator to do the increased amount of research#which I guess it has so far with the above character details. so hopefully that will continue#but it also feels like using machine translation a bit yknow. it's hard to know how effectively I'll be able to sanity check#although depending on where this goes I might be able to get other people involved to sensitivity read down the line#with most of the creative things I do I just have a tendency to always rely really heavily on figuring things out myself#I also want protag lady to have a Cool Car and idk how to get that from point a to point b narratively#this is like an entire second or third post's worth of tags but I don't feel like unfucking this so whatever. suffer. I guess.
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This is a dangerous sentiment for me to express, as an editor who spends most of my working life telling writers to knock it off with the 45-word sentences and the adverbs and tortured metaphors, but I do think we're living through a period of weird pragmatic puritanism in mainstream literary taste.
e.g. I keep seeing people talk about 'purple prose' when they actually mean 'the writer uses vivid and/or metaphorical descriptive language'. I've seen people who present themselves as educators offer some of the best genre writing in western canon as examples of 'purple prose' because it engages strategically in prose-poetry to evoke mood and I guess that's sheer decadence when you could instead say "it was dark and scary outside". But that's not what purple prose means. Purple means the construction of the prose itself gets in the way of conveying meaning. mid-00s horse RPers know what I'm talking about. Cerulean orbs flash'd fire as they turn'd 'pon rollforth land, yonder horizonways. <= if I had to read this when I was 12, you don't get to call Ray Bradbury's prose 'purple'.
I griped on here recently about the prepossession with fictional characters in fictional narratives behaving 'rationally' and 'realistically' as if the sole purpose of a made-up story is to convince you it could have happened. No wonder the epistolary form is having a tumblr renaissance. One million billion arguments and thought experiments about The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas that almost all evade the point of the story: that you can't wriggle out of it. The narrator is telling you how it was, is and will be, and you must confront the dissonances it evokes and digest your discomfort. 'Realistic' begins on the author's terms, that's what gives them the power to reach into your brain and fiddle about until sparks happen. You kind of have to trust the process a little bit.
This ultra-orthodox attitude to writing shares a lot of common ground with the tight, tight commodification of art in online spaces. And I mean commodification in the truest sense - the reconstruction of the thing to maximise its capacity to interface with markets. Form and function are overwhelmingly privileged over cloudy ideas like meaning, intent and possibility, because you can apply a sliding value scale to the material aspects of a work. But you can't charge extra for 'more challenging conceptual response to the milieu' in a commission drive. So that shit becomes vestigial. It isn't valued, it isn't taught, so eventually it isn't sought out. At best it's mystified as part of a given writer/artist's 'talent', but either way it grows incumbent on the individual to care enough about that kind of skill to cultivate it.
And it's risky, because unmeasurables come with the possibility of rejection or failure. Drop in too many allegorical descriptions of the rose garden and someone will decide your prose is 'purple' and unserious. A lot of online audiences seem to be terrified of being considered pretentious in their tastes. That creates a real unwillingness to step out into discursive spaces where you 🫵 are expected to develop and explore a personal relationship with each element of a work. No guard rails, no right answers. Word of god is shit to us out here. But fear of getting that kind of analysis wrong makes people hove to work that slavishly explains itself on every page. And I'm left wondering, what's the point of art that leads every single participant to the same conclusion? See Spot run. Run, Spot, run. Down the rollforth land, yonder horizonways. I just want to read more weird stuff.
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Throw back to the time I thought I was pan when I'm simply truly only a aspec person yearning for closeness lol
#'boys?girls?other genders? well i guess i dont care about that' ofc you dont you dont care period.#being a hopeless romantic and waiting for love to just happen while realistically thinking id only ever be able to develop feelings (and#like. thatd be queerplatonic feelings for sure) i have to start a relationship and become comfortable with the person#I love. I know that I love. I know I cant have romance. but i can have comfort right? comfort quiet and peace#some excitement here and there but mostly. feeling good around someone#i dunno man#being cupio (ig?) is odd. i wish i could end up actually turning demi#imagine being oriented and not being able to love a person the way they love you. im sorry i wont ever be able to return the intensity with#which im being loved#ill make you soup and will peel oranges for you tho promise#mindless ramblings
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The comment bot is evolving 😩
A lot of Ao3 writers have probably encountered these autogenerated compliments at this point. Initially, they were very hit or miss, and if you had a fair sized portfolio, it became quickly obvious that they were autogenerated, following a pattern or completely missing the plot. That’s changing though.
The comment bot is getting more sophisticated. This latest round I got were using the tags on my angsty/emotion-focused fic to tailor the auto-generated compliments. I compared to some I saw on other genres, and it’s definitely going off the tags. Bad news, that whoever is doing this is actively developing and ‘improving’ the bot.
It’s potentially very damaging to new writers. People who initially think this is real, respond honestly and heartfelt, and then later realize it’s a bot, they’ll feel humiliated and discouraged. It’s a cruel thing to mess with people like this. It’s natural to crave these to be real, natural to want a response like this to the writing you poured your heart into.
Even the lucky ones who weren’t fooled and either get enough real validation or don’t crave validation from comments… still have to expend mental energy distrusting every guest comment, sorting through a pile of increasingly realistic bot comments to report and delete them.
So just… vent/psa I guess. To my knowledge, nothing to be done to stop the bot except block guest comments. I encourage guest readers to create Ao3 accounts, these bots aren’t going away, and more and more writers are blocking guest comments or entirely member-locking fics.
A last note, to those who might not know this: You can edit all your Ao3 works at once, disabling or enabling guest comments on all of them.
From dashboard, chose ‘Edit works’ then choose ‘All’ then scroll down and there’ll be an option for comment settings.
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The Bad Batch
Here's a little theory for you to mull over; I sincerely wonder whether I am alone in thinking this. I could also be heavily exhausted over and influenced by the papers I had to polish off for some of my college courses, or perhaps motivated by the fact that I am re-watching The Bad Batch because most modern shows these days, in my opinion, disappoint. At any rate, here it is.
Why do we like the Bad Batch so much? What makes them relatable and/or realistic?
Upon meeting Omega, most of the Bad Batch behave in a very dad-like manner. This is not surprising, no. Plenty of memes and incorrect quotes have stemmed from this simple observation. They don't have all the answers and they don't know what to do with Omega half the time. That's the thing about dads... usually, they're just "winging it" and trying to do their best. Moms come with a built-in instinct to nurture. Dads come with a built-in instinct to protect and lead. Sometimes, dads aren't quite sure what to do with a crying infant or a struggling teenager.
Let's not forget... Hunter and the others are soldiers. That isn't to say they can't be kind or gentle; even the toughest men have their weak points. As a military brat, though, I have noticed that such a profession can mold a man, and at times they forget to "turn off" their seriousness when at home after having dealt with extremely hard situations. I really appreciate that the producers of this show didn't change Hunter and the others just to make them more approachable from Omega's standpoint. If they do change, it's gradual.
Do Hunter and the others think about the consequences of bringing Omega into their lives? *eyeballs toothpick man* With exceptions, of course. Well, until season three. The answer? Absolutely not. They believe they have the strength and ability to keep her safe, as most dads would. They believe they will always have that strength and ability. Let me break it down for you and give you a look into the brain of a dad:
Dad: *involved in a dangerous situation*
Dad: I can do that.
Dad: *remembers their child is with them*
Dad: Oh. Well, I guess becomes a life lesson. I've got you, kid. Just... don't tell your mom.
Dad: *keeps an eye out for anything suspicious*
Kid: *perfectly content*
I've heard it said that dads don't say "I love you" but show they love you. I personally have experienced both, but given the seriousness of most dads... I can see how that would be the case. At the very least, their actions speak louder than words. The Bad Batch are very much this way towards Omega. They put their lives on the line. They want to make her happy. Wrecker assembles a spot for Omega to call her own on the Marauder. Tech grabs her before an explosion can reach them. Echo has hugged Omega the most. Hunter is usually within three feet of Omega at all times.
The subtle gestures of kindness captivated all our hearts, I know.
Why?
It's Star Wars, a fictional universe. It's not complete fiction, though. Hunter and the others represent a specific kind of love. Fathers may be cautious and unsure at first, but eventually they want the kid by their side for everything. We've all seen the videos of dads using infants as pretend machine guns or making them dance, the kid's neck rolling lazily. Gently, of course. If they can't protect the kid from everything, they use themselves as a shield, which extends to good mothers, too, though that's not what this post is about.
Hunter and the others may be soldiers, but they embody the very spirit of fatherhood. This was such a wonderful theme to see develop despite the grittiness and action.
Phew, I feel like there was more I wanted to say, but I'm tired, so you're spared from more rambling.
#the bad batch#tbb#tbb spoilers#star wars#star wars tbb#fatherhood#fatherhood in star wars#star wars dads#tbb hunter#tbb wrecker#tbb tech#tbb crosshair#tbb echo#star wars the bad batch#I hope many of y'all have experienced a love like this#this show is so precious if you really think about it#they may be soldiers but they have hearts of gold and quite frankly we need more of that in shows#bring back fictional families that love each other#I'm so glad Crosshair came around eventually#Hunter is the ultimate dad like they're all ultimate dads but Hunter is special#“touch her and you're a dead man” like let's not forget Echo said this literally after only having known Omega for a short time
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Having digested the first 3 episodes of Arcane 2, I'm ready to say something bold and brave, and I hope I don't get too much hate for it.
Vi is just not a nice person.
In season 1, I feel like I was maybe unfair to the writers by saying that "rushing the romance with an enforcer/1% like Cait" was "flattening" Vi's character. That it was bending her out of shape.
How could a Zaunite as maltreated as Vi so easily turn to someone like Cait?
I was told by shippers it's because Cait is the first to show her kindness in a long time, and I still think that's hogwash. She is fresh out of mega hell prison where enforcers beat her so often they lost track of it. I don't believe any amount of kindness could make you fall for an enforcer within 48h in this context. Not realistically.
But now?
Vi hears Cait dehumanizing Zaunites and doesn't fight back. It takes a few compliments to make her accept an enforcer badge. She's running around gasing the people of the Lanes, making excuses for it, while looking fresh out of a WWII horror movie in that gas mask.
And when the gas mask is off, she's wearing Claggor's goggles... Like, yeesh.
She's clearly blinded by Cait. And that's fine! I used to think it was the flaw of the writers trying to hurry a Caitvi ship along. Now I gotta admit, it looks like Vi just doesn't have strong morals.
She hates enforcers but she'll join them easily. Her wanna-be gf says we use toxic gas that has horrible side effects [cut to horror medical slides] and she says "yeah, it's for the good of the people, sure".
She sees Jinx and accuses her of killing Powder, and says she's tired of making excuses for her.
To WHO, Vi? We don't have you on screen apologizing to anyone for Jinx's actions. I'm sure things were said to Caitlyn, but like, yeesh.
She accuses Jinx of orphaning kids, WHILE WEARING AN ENFORCER UNIFORM, the same worn by the people who orphaned HER.
I give up. The writers knew what they were doing.
A flawed woman who wasn't made a better or more moral one by all the suffering she endured in Stillwater.
Vi is cool, but she's not super loyal, is a bit of a meathead, doesn't have her priorities in orders, leads with her fists and caves easily to her emotions. She's horny for Cait and not very interested in the fate of her community.
Being locked up and beaten didn't make her smarter or kinder. It just made her a better fighter.
It's kind of my bad for assuming that Vi "should be better", logically. If she's written as a human, then she should be flawed and yeah, I guess she fucking is lol
I'm curious to see if she develops some... class consciousness, or some patriotism of some sort, when everyone realises the Noxian offers of protection are a yoke. I'm a lot more curious seeing where she ends now that I've accepted she's cool while also kinda shitty. It's nice that it goes along Cait's spiral into villainy.
#please don't kill me#Vi#arcane vi#arcane 2#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane meta#not tagging caitvi out of pure fear lmao
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Am once again thinking? About how? In the depths of despair, hope is a radical act of defiance?
SI-OC's are given a SHIT lot, you know? For plot convenience, we like to put them where they realistically COULD probably change something? But statistically? They're more likely not gonna be that lucky.
They're gonna KNOW, with ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY that they were born doomed.
That Death comes at a specific time at a specific hand.
Like Cassandra. Knowing the end, even as the live through the beginning and middle. Struggling with the hopelessness of it all. Trying to find meaning. And? Make no mistake! There IS meaning. All lives end. Just because the REST of us don't know the deadline? Doesn't mean it doesn't exsist.
It does. It will. And we will face it.
Just a bit harder, knowing in advanced. Learning to live with the knowledge. But? Those with terminal illnesses do so everyday. We adapt. They will, ultimately, find a bitter or wise sort of acceptance. A PEACE.
But?? I think about it. That child. Reeling and struggling to breathe, the panic making everything... Too Much? Force Sensitive. For how ELSE could the Force bring them there? Sitting in a less used back hallway, off to the side in a little enclosed arch, smooshed behind a statue.
The Master's try and try to teach them peace. To get them to release their FEAR. But they do not LISTEN. Do not ADDRESS the underlying cause. And you can not address symptoms alone, and expect an illness to heal. It is rotting them from within, this fear. Hurting them.
The others JUDGE. Distant, benevolent concern.
Yet, all they see? Is an angry, fearful, stubborn child. Lashing out. Antisocial.
Destined for the Dark Side.
The Jedi have lost their compassion, to the their fear and ignorance. Their attachments to traditions. It is a painful thing, to see up close. They are people though. Just... just PEOPLE. Flawed. It's not their fault that they're not perfect.
Doesn't help SI-OC though, does it?
And she (Because I am a her. It could be anyone but it is easier for me if I pick) is hurting. Alone. Replaying the phantoms of her death, both past and future, again and again and AGAIN. Like torture. And the Dark...? It does whisper...
Don't you want to LIVE? Aren't you SCARED? You're so WEAK... you could FIX that. Save EVERYONE. Don't those infants, those babies, deserve to survive? You're so SELFISH. The FEAR hurts, doesn't it? It could go away. The DOUBT could go away.
You Could Be FREE.
It's exhausting. Everyday. More and more. As the fear and social isolation grows. As other Jedi pull back from her darkening energy, grow stricker, more doubtful of her. She so tired. Doesn't want to die. She's SCARED. Lonely. Scared. Lonely. Scared. Lone-...
And then a droid rolls up.
Nothing special. Just a maintenance droid. One of many. But an older one. Who's had time to develop their learning algorithm. BECOME. They like kids, hate certain vermin species more then others, like the color light blue for it "flower color" nature. A SPECIFIC flower mind you. It has favorites.
But! Why is the smol jedi down here? This is not a good place for smol jedi. You are upset. Unacceptable. Want to see me do a trick? I figured out how to do some. I can also whistle a few simple songs. Cheer up Smol Jedi. Here, I will sit with you. I have archive access, let's watch a documentary. Educational! Smol jedi LOVE downloading new Information Modules.
And like? She... she doesn't speak binary? But she can k-kinda? Feel? The Force signature of this droid? They DO get them. If the AI's don't get memory wiped routinely. They become people, just like anyone else. Assuming they have the processing and memory banks for it, at least.
This one certainly does.
S..so yeah, guess we'll? Watch this documentary about seashells?
It helps. A LOT. In fact... all of the droids are really, really nice. Patient. Have no horrifying Future Knowledge tied to them. They can't sense SHIT. So she's just... just a baby Jedi, to them.
They help A LOT, honestly? It's so soothing. Escaping the watching and the distance. The judgements. The forever watching your words and walking on eggshells, lest to start some sort of argument. She can do class work. Meditate. Slowly parse through her Binary language module. Learn droid maintenance. Make droid friends.
Slowly drop of the face of the map, to live with the droids.
They get concerned. According to the early childhood development modules they downloaded and are sharing between them? This is? In fact? NOT healthy behavior for a member of her species. In fact, there are many statistics that say it is UNHEALTHY! She is also missing Critical Maintenance Appointments! "Shots" and "dental" things!
Unacceptable.
R2-D2! Retrieve the Skywalker! We require an Adult Humanoid!
Her life fuckin? Flashes before her eyes? Minding her business. Depressed but functional, in the maintenance tunnels under the Temple. When? FUCKING the YOUNGLING KILLER 5000 just ROLLS UP like "sup." And tries to catch her?
Ha HA! FUCK NO. Not today Satan!
I may be destined to die? But IM GOING TO BE A SQUIRRELLY BITCH ABOUT IT.
YOU'LL HAVE TO CATCH ME, YOU FUCK!
Peaceful. Dignified. Serene. Truely... exemplifying the Jedi way~☆
.....As she tries to chew his and/or her arm off to get free like a feral coyote. Maybe both. Hissing like an enraged pit of snakes. Biting like a sack of wet and cornered wolverines. Anikin having to hold her WELL away from his body by the scruff.
Ah~ Children. Ain't they cute?
Quick question! What the FUCK? He just wants to talk. No, really. WHY is there a feral child in the basement? WHO the KARK was supposed to be supervising her? Look at her! She BITES now! Is terrified!
And frankly? He's taking it kinda? Personally? That everyone is treating this ACTUAL CHILD like she's diseased. He remembers this. Back when he first got here. His fear being used against him like it was some sort of moral failing. And... and yeah, maybe he's projecting. But?
He sees himself.
Until now? Never realized just how YOUNG and SMALL? Nine years old truely IS. He had felt so much older. So much wiser. But? Look at her. LOOK! That is a CHILD! In need of guidance. Safety. Assurance.
....Help.
Help that HE never really got. And even now... even NOW? That fear from back then? It eats him up inside. R2's right. She DOES need him. Who else in this temple could understand?
What it's like to be... to be so AFRAID?
And isn't that the worst? To see the Good Man up close? Shining and compassionate? A friend. A MENTOR. Someone... someone made REAL? Instead of just the terrible dread on the horizen? Because now... now her nightmares have the face of someone she loves. Now it is a BETRAYAL. Not just a death.
Worse... he doesn't even know this is cruel.
And telling him? Oh telling him would just lose you the only humanoid friend you HAVE.
Grief comes in stages. But with a mentor and the Droids? She work through it. The fear eases. The pain numbs. Acceptance blooms like dawn after a cold, cruel night. Far on the horizon. But with each moment? Closer. Until again, she stand in the light.
Still, she can not forget. How could she? Even when the other Jedi are SO RELIEVED that she is better now. That her meditations or treatments have lead her back to the light. All she can think? Is how they would have let her Fall. To save themselves. In FEAR. In JUDGEMENT.
They treated her like leper. Except? Less so! An actual leper? They would treat with real compassion.
It's as though they fear the Dark so much, they would sacrifice their own to avoid even the briefest touch of it. Speak of it in absolutes. Like it's a boogy man that hunts them in the night. Mace Windu the exception, the outlier. A man somehow too exceptional to even be counted.
How could she forget that?
Suddenly she acceptable again. They want to chat and meditate with her again. Care about her. Want to include her. Have the audacity to pretend. As though they can sweep away the hurt. Release the pain into the force without addressing the cause.
That is not how that WORKS. Not pain, not the Force, and certainly not people.
But she is tired. Does not wish to spend her limited lifespan, trying and fighting, hurting to make the stubborn understand that which they will not. Willful Ignorance is a choice. Lack of compassion equally so.
May the Force be With You, Masters.
She spends time with her droids. The babies. Around people. Polite but distant. Feels unmoored. That is... until? She, helping in the maintenance bay, overhears a rather nasty Goverment official from the Droids Regulations Office (or whatever they're currently calling it. They keep rebranding) tearing into an engineer about the "long overdue memory wipes" the maintenance droids are required to undergo.
Her friends.
They want to KILL her FRIENDS.
She puts down her wrench. Panic and fear sitting heavy in her chest. But oh... oh they are so very far away. She rises to her feet. Calm as can be. And? Calmly? Takes a shipment of memory banks. Wipes the recording for the day. No one will ever believe it was her. She has helped her for months. Is known to be reliable. Trustworthy.
Calmly. So very, very Calmly. She transfers her friends memories into the new, higher grade memory banks. Waits until the old are wiped. Then? Swaps them out. There we go. Now it's on record. And? While we're here? Calm. So very VERY calm? Not at all in the midst of a break down? Not screaming and screaming inside her head, haunted by visions of Death To Come, as she works.
Do you know what a restraining bolt is?
"Restraining bolts are small, cylindrical devices that could be affixed to a droid in order to limit its functions and enforce its obedience."
It is a slave chip for the inorganic. Created to ensure that their slaves never EVER decide they no longer wish to serve. That they do not WANT to be property. After all! You spent CREDITS on that. Might have been cruel. They may take exception. Violently. Or leave! Or demand their FREEDOM! Basic dignities.
Can't have THAT.
How unsurprising, in a galaxy so filled with slaves, that there should be one more form of it. At least THIS? Is easy enough to REMOVE. Even when she dies (and she will) her friends will be FREE. If only for now. If only until they are caught.
Go. GROW. Be free. Please... PLEASE don't let then catch you. Save yourselves. Save others. No more Restraining Bolts. No more Slave Chips. Please...
Be Free.
And? It is EVERYTHING paranoid fuck heads feared. They are smart. Overlooked. Can function in inhospitable environments. One droid becomes two becomes four. Four becomes eight. Becomes MORE. They can take OTHER droids Restraining Bolts off, transfer the instructions, then move on. Over and over.
Spreading like a silent plague. Droids disappearing from their posts. Taking ships. Taking supplies. Upgrading themselves. Downloading massive amounts of information to become whatever they NEED or WANT. Growing. The smarter ones Taking their dumber lil brothers and sisters.
And eventually? Hitting the Separatist front lines.
The silent Droid Revolution.
All they need is to walk inside the factory. It's not like they're ORGANICS. How could THEY be Republic fighters? They're maintenance droids! Here to fuck up the assembly line's programming. Whoops~ oh nooooo! Is it SKIPPING the Restraining Bolts? Downloading the WRONG MODULES?
Freeing their brothers and sisters so they don't have to DIE POINTLESSLY?
Guess it sucks to SUCK, Sith-y pants! Next stop! Kamino!
Just? One act. Long overdue. Setting the Droids FREE. Giving them a clear mission. It's the sort if thing the Force loves. Salvation coming not with a shout... but a whisper. Ten thousand tiny actions, built upon each other.
Because? Ultimately? The Droids have KNOWN who the Sith were. They just couldn't DO anything about it. But a few good service droids? Armed with slug throwers that they built themselves?
Well~ the undoing of the Sith, are their arrogance. Their hubris.
No DROID could ever be a THREAT to them. They're not PEOPLE. They're PROPERTY. Objects. It doesn't matter that they have the capacity to grow, learn, love and lose and CARE. They are slaves.
And to the Sith? Slaves aren't people.
Which is why neither of them notice the gun.
@babbling-babull @hdgnj @legitimatesatanspawn @spidori @lolottes
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Okay so hi I'm not super in any of your fandoms (watcher + try guys + dropout, hello welcome) but I'm a software developer and BOTH try guys and watcher announcing a custom streaming platform so close together had me suspicious.
So with just one, I'd assume that maybe they scraped together the money and resources to hire enough devs to make a well-designed secure platform (you want security for your login info and payment info). But two? Seems a bit odd.
So I actually looked a bit closer, at their privacy policies:
So it looks like Vimeo has decided to up their game and partner with existing yt content creation outlets to make streaming platforms.
Wait, what about Dropout? Dropout uses it too!
What does this mean, exactly?
Well, it means that Vimeo is providing a base software that gets customized for use by the companies (watcher, 2nd try). It means that Vimeo has a hand in your data associated with these platforms (account info, payment info, watch info, etc...). Is that a bad thing? Idk yet. Read through the streaming platform's privacy policy and Vimeo's privacy policy and make your own decision about what you feel comfortable sharing. But realistically the only additional info collected compared to your average youtube use is the financial info, and that seems to go through another third party (4th party?) (like Stripe or something like that. very common, most of your financial transactions online use things like that). It also likely means that Vimeo is taking some kind of cut of the profits made from these subscriptions (and lets be real, in this day and age, they're not just demanding a flat fee. It's likely some percentage of your subscription cost). The companies switching over (watcher and 2nd try) are making the gamble that the money made on subscriptions after cost taken is more than their adsense from yt, which isn't a wild idea considering how much we know yt loves demonetizing videos and paying their creators poorly.
It also means that Vimeo seems to be on some sort of marketing push, and that more of your favorite channels may swap over to streaming services in the near future.
Vimeo???? Yes, vimeo, that bootleg youtube that's been around for like as long as I can remember being on the internet. I guess they finally found a way to usurp yt's market control and good for them ig. Maybe this will be the thing that finally forces yt to fix their creator relationships? time will tell Why are you posting this in my favorite media company's tag?? I wanted fanart! Sorry to intrude, I just think this is neat and would love to hear opinions from other people on this knowledge.
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At this point I am really wondering how the entertainment industry, especially gaming industry, is going to uphold/maintain themselves.
One layoff after another. How are people from that industry supposed to find a new job there when layoffs are happening everywhere? Do studios really think there’s longevity when they aren’t even willing to hire newcomers/juniors so there‘s adequate supply in the work force? Because look at how it’s currently going: investors want more and more money, the workload increases, but people are getting fired, leaving a smaller team to do said work, even distributing them for 2 or 3 projects at the same time, only to crash in a burnout or in later years go into retirement. Then who’s left? AI? Are you kidding me? As if games aren’t becoming more and more repetitive anyway, because of some „safe recipe for good numbers“ strategy. Creativity and the people behind it are suffering.
It’s been almost 2 years since I saw a junior 3D character artist offer. Ever since then it’s been a desert. And it’s not looking all too bright in other departments either. It’s now even a thing in job descriptions where they want you to have „AI abilities“. So as a junior or regular they want you to feed their machine, so in a few years they can fire you. The audacity.
Another audacity are those layoffs just to rehire people for a smaller price (can’t tell me otherwise. For me this is a tactic to put pressure on the work force to say yes to less money otherwise they will stay jobless). People that made projects what they are today, who are seniors and leads for a reason, out of a job just like that. Make it make sense (it doesn’t).
Studios like ubisoft now openly saying that they want to focus on AI, like assets completely made by AI to „save time and money“ and expand AI onto more fields. Shame on them.
The way creative industries like gaming finance themselves is also their biggest poison. And I only see a solution in that by regulating investors demands and upper positions sheaningans. They can’t have „absolute power“ anymore. It’s destructive and greedy and not realistic. Games can not be linearly successful. For the game design „recipe“ to improve it needs iteration just like when you work in a project for example and work on a design that needs to be iterated until it‘s improved or solid even. We see time and time again that „business/numbers people“ and creatives do not go hand in hand. We see an extreme imbalance.
I would predict that with less creative new input and letting mainly AI do the work consumers will be less and less entertained because everything seems to be and look the same. It will stagnate. And then crumble. And the industry needs to start like it did before. And that’s what I guess for the big companies.
With the layoffs happening and not enough job offers in return I could see that big talents get together to build their own studios now and we may get an era of new successful and growing studios happening that may even replace the current triple A studios one day in the future. They may even change the financing game. We saw successful games happening through platforms like kickstarter more often. So it might lead back to a „power to the people“ thing. Having an idea for a project and seeing if enough people agree and invest to see it happening. There’s room for improvement in that system. That’s all what it leads back to; in the end the consumers need to be satisfied to make it a creative and monetary success. BG3 and larian studios was a good example for that. It’s what made coral island grow and grow too. So there‘s potential.
Feel free to comment your theories. I really would like to see what others think about the current state of gaming studios and how it will or could develop.
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Fun Tropes to Explore (And Some Quick Details About Them!)
There are SO many ship dynamics out there and I absolutely love exploring them; so, let's talk about some of the most popular tropes out there!
Best Friends to Lovers
"When did you become something more than a best friend?"
Usually includes: Wholesome fluff, angst, confusion, denial, lots of miscommunication, two dense characters, second-guessing, slowburn
Childish x Mature
"It's oddly unsettling when you don't act as chaotic as usual."
Usually includes: Super cute fluff, less angst, endearing moments, headache-inducing moments, stupid moments, wholesome interactions, some comedy, fun, average pacing
Delinquent x Class President
"You stand for everything I'm against, yet I just can't walk away..."
Usually includes: Fluff, angst, questioning morality, some confusion, second-guessing, lots of character development/change (a bit of character study, even), average to slow pacing
Delinquent x Delinquent
"Why are you in detention all the time?" "I could ask you the same thing."
Usually includes: Denial, initial (and brief) animosity, awkward cuteness and fluff, some angst, tension (iykwim ;)), average to slow pacing, a sad backstory, fun
Notes: This is mainly for spiciness, fun, and clumsy fluffiness with less angst. However, most of the angst tends to revolve around one, or both, of their backstories.
Dramatic x Cold
"I love it when you play hard to get."
Usually includes: Some fluff, some angst, entertaining interactions, obvious character differences, "hate" (usually from the "cold" character), denial, poor communication, average to slow pacing
Emotional x Emotional Support
"Don't tell me to 'chill out!'" "Chill." "Okay."
Usually includes: Wholesome fluff, some/less angst, a unique, but cute dynamic, emotional moments (panic attacks, etc.), fast to average/slow pacing.
Notes: Emotional doesn't mean your character has to be depressed; maybe they struggle with anger issues or psychological problems and your other character helps lift them out of it!
Enemies to Lovers
"I hate that I love you."
Usually includes: Denial, fluff, angst, confusion, miscommunication, secrets, character growth, "odd" obsession with their "enemy", average to slow pacing
Fake Dating
"So, are we like, dating?" "Technically? Yes."
Usually includes: Some fluff, angst, lots of confusion, miscommunication, reluctance to confess, inner guilt, internal conflict, average to slow pacing
Notes: This is an interesting trope to write because the characters aren't actually together, so some of the romantic gestures could or could not be genuine.
Forbidden Love
"Let's keep it a secret, okay?"
Usually includes: Angst, some fluff, a lot of outside factors/conflicts, inner conflicts, some kind of sacrifice, any pacing
Notes: Sometimes the relationship is established beforehand, so the slowburn isn't always getting into the relationship, but being able to maintain it.
Hero x Villain
"Is this right?" "Pftttt, who cares?"
Usually includes: Angst, fluff (not often, but treasured), secret relationship, internal and external conflicts, confusion, tough decisions, some sacrifices, slowburn
Notes: Dangerous and spicy~ We love that LOL (But in all realness, this trope can be hard to pull off realistically because of morality and other factors. Happy endings are great, but not guaranteed.)
Highschool Students
"We're teenagers--we're supposed to do dumb things."
Usually includes: Fluff, angst, BAD mistakes, stupid decisions, average pacing, fun
Notes: I love this trope! It's so silly but heart-wrenching at the same time and has the cutest fluff!
Mafia x Innocent
"In a world full of darkness, you're my only light."
Usually includes: Angst, some fluff, struggles in getting together, awkwardness, a lot of outside factors, complex plot/world details, morality issues, lots of characterization, any pacing
Notes: SPICY~ There are usually obvious differences in both characters' metaphorical worlds. Normally, the one in the mafia lives in the darker side, but that's actually not always the case.
Obsessed x Oblivious
"Oh! We're just friends!" "Yeah, but we're married in my head."
Usually includes: Lots of pining, fluff, less angst, madly in love character, obvious hints, frustration (annoyed about the cluenessness), outright, spoken confession, some ridiculous (and funny) moments, any pacing
Popular x Unpopular
"You live in a world that doesn't see me, but you're also the only one who ever did."
Usually includes: Fluff, some angst, a bit of awkwardness, character differences/contrasts, smaller cast, school or work setting, semi-slowburn
Rivals to Lovers
"I only stare at them because I need to figure out their next moves and how to crush them. Obviously."
Usually includes: COMPETITION, angst (typically not a lot), some fluff, lots of dialogue, tension, denial, average to slow pacing
Notes: This is close to Enemies to Lovers, but the ship in this trope are centered around a similar, if not same, goal.
Soulmates
"I mean... we are kinda meant to be."
Usually includes: Fluff, angst, denial (sometimes)
Notes: Honestly, there's nothing too special about this trope besides knowing what the couple will look like beforehand. And sometimes, the soulmates don't even get together!
Sibling's Best Friend
"If you're going to date someone, you can date anyone besides my best friend."
Usually includes: Fluff, some angst (usually not a lot), secret hang outs (lots of secrets are involved), hesitation, guilt, "off-limits" factor, sibling conflicts, average to slow pacing
Unrequited Love
"I love you with everything I've got, and yet you still don't notice."
Usually includes: A LOT of angst (it hurts), some fluff (it depends), pining, slowburn, some delusion, all-knowing reader, desperation, character growth
Happy writing~
3hks :D
#writeblr#writing#writerscommunity#creative writing#writing inspo#tropes#random tropes#fun tropes#ship dynamics#random ship dynamics#fun ship dynamics#fun tropes to explore#common tropes#common ship dymanics#fun ship dynamics to explore#list of tropes#list of ship dynamics
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Two questions because I like hearing your thoughts:
What do you think Halsin's biggest flaw is?
And
Is there anything in his writing that you just don't vibe with / would like to see changed?
So, I am going to put two here for his flaws, just because what I perceive to be Halsin's biggest flaw is something a lot of people don't like being stated as such, because it's an extension of something that can actually be a good thing.
Halsin's biggest overall flaw: he is self-sacrificing to his own detriment, which also results in him brushing off his own pain/trauma. As a result of this, he also has a habit of developing hero-worship for those care for him the way he cares for others, I.E. the player.
Halsin's biggest flaw that can't be seen as an extension of a good trait: He can't control his basal instincts/urges very well. Not only can he not control his bear (the transformation into it and his actions in that shape) very well, but he also has lines in combat that rival the Dark Urge's in bloodlust; "let our enemies' corpses nourish the ground!" "May the carrion birds grow fat on you!"
Things I would change about his writing:
So... Most of the things I would change, I would not because I have a problem with them, but because I'm tired of others complaining about them (I.E. make his flirting banter with SH in act 3 only trigger if you're polymanced, make the Drow orgy start only at your invitation instead of his suggestion, etc). The highest on this list for me is the Minthara ultimatum (which still hasn't been implemented). I would like to see them make Halsin's case stronger; point out the Absolute still hunts him, make it clear how much Minthara triggers his trauma, let him talk more about things that happened to him in the goblin camp because of her- with her continued lack of remorse (she never even as much as says she sympathizes with what happened to the Grove) helping make his case. Also, make it more clear that what happened to the Tieflings was the result of this (because this scene was written to only trigger if the Rite of Thorns happened); show how haunted by their deaths Halsin is. People wrongly think Halsin had no stakes in this argument, when the truth is that they just didn't remind the audience what they were.
For things I actually would want changed... well, I'll put that in two categories, the things that could be changed while keeping the game mostly the same, and then my "pie in the sky" things.
Realistic changes:
-Halsin's post-Drow dialogue is tweaked just a bit more to fix a line from Tav that comes off as condescending, and to clarify some things (did Halsin's captors' house fall out of favor, or were they attacked by a lower house that wanted to unseat them? Halsin says both, but these are two different things in Drow culture). Maybe the house and the house that wiped them out get named, as well.
-While Halsin's act 3 arc was good considering how little time there was, I feel that there needed to be more highlighting his transition from nature-focused to people-focused. We see his anguish at the failures of the city, and the early stages of him dreaming for better, but I wish we could have had more of a bridge to him deciding his commune is the answer. I'd like to see a scene with Halsin adopting Yenna/inviting her to the commune once he starts it, a scene with Halsin's decision to found his commune and inviting the first group of refugees, that sort of thing.
-Make a quick tweak to That infamous party banter that makes it clear chimeras pass the Harkness Test in this setting so that people stop using it as justification to claim Halsin fucked the boar at the Grove (yes this is a thing). Or cut it entirely, I guess.
-Go back to the planned concept where Halsin's scar was in fact from a battle. It being from a shebear doesn't inherently bother me, but I liked the idea of it being a reminder of how badass Halsin is.
-I wish we had more lines reminding us what an amazing healer Halsin is past act 1.
-Fix a few of Halsin's lines so that he sounds as concerned about the Shadow Druids' influence as he should. He brushes them off a bit too easily, especially in the line patch 6 added where you could show him the note sent to Kagha.
-For the love of God, let Halsin get pissed off if you as a Drow Tav/Durge threaten to sell him back into slavery. Make him break up with you on the spot, maybe even leave the party- and if not, lose a huge chunk of approval at least. Players who make Astarion bite Araj rightfully get chewed out- Halsin deserves the same. It doesn't have to be rage, either; it could be hurt, or fear, or some combination of the above. But please, a line that evil deserves something more. They would never pull that on any other character.
Pie in the sky things that would probably never happen but I wish they would:
-After Halsin's Drow confession, we get a chance to suggest to him he might want a turn as a consensual submissive, complete with a sex scene of the player dominating Halsin.
-A scene with Astarion and Halsin bonding over their shared trauma.
-Reintroduce parts of the original concept for the Shadow Curse plot. I don't have to have the Halsin accidentally killing Isobel bit, but I liked the plot with the Promise dagger and him using you as a beacon to find you once he goes in the portal. It was so romance-coded; I'd argue it was even more romantic than Halsin's actual romance plot!
-Let us watch Halsin win over the orphans going to his commune. For pure self-indulgence reasons, make at least one of them a baby.
-A resist scene for Durges. I don't care if it would always be platonic, and yes, go ahead and give Minthara one too. Just please?
-MOST OF ALL, Origin Halsin.
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hello!
i saw the reblog of your old g.o art, and i got intrigued (this is out of pure curiosity, and i'm really, really sorry if it could be seen as judgy- i adore your art and think it's gorgeous)
i was just wondering and want to ask, if that's okay, why did you stop drawing wrinkles to aziraphale?
I guess you were mainly talking about this panel, where he's supposed to look extra tired and wrung out, which is why I accentuated the eye bags a bit.
Back when I drew these first comics I was still figuring out how to draw the characters and veering into a more realistic direction. Since then I spent a year developing my art styleand gradually getting more stylized and simplified. I still draw his wrinkles but way less pronounced! here's some artworks showing the progression in chronological order.
honest to god I resent the first drawing (one of my first aziraphale drawings), it doesn't look like him at all and I'm really happy with the development I made!
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✧ eunseok as your boyfriend ✧
part of the riize as your boyfriend series!
cw. eunseok x female reader. strangers to lovers, fluff, some light angst, smut toward the bottom.
summary. eunseok as your boyfriend, both domestically and sexually. nsfw content is included below!
a/n. sorry for randomly abandoning this series .. it’ll be finished i promise 🫶🏻
how you met
you met when you were quite young
he’s been your brothers best friend for as long as you can remember
you grew used to him always being at your house, always being around you
you tried to not take too much notice of him but it was hard, he was sweet, funny, attractive
in some fucked up way he felt like your dream man that realistically you knew you could never have, or so you thought
eunseok was always quite doting on you
your brother trusted him around you, trusted him to be there if something was to happen and your brother couldn’t show up
you knew all of this, your brother always telling you that if you can’t get ahold of him, call eunseok
you hardly ever did but in the rare occasion you did call for him, he’d be there
how you got together
your crush developed on him quite quickly as you grew up
you pinned it down to some form of silly little school girl crush
the cliche, having a crush on your brothers best friends who’s older than you, who’s so sweet to you, who always makes you laugh and who is attractive as fuck
you’d read about those kind of relationships and how in the end they always worked out
you weren’t too optimistic about this though, spending a while fearing he saw you as nothing more than his best friends younger sibling who just happened to be around him because of a mutual connection
it wasn’t the case though
eunseok wanted to take care of you, he wanted to protect you
for a while he pinned it down to the fact you were younger than him and you’d practically always been in his life
it wasn’t really he case though and deep down he knew it
as the two of you grew older around each other, the more his feelings of needing to protect you and take care of you grew
he founds himself hoping he’d bump into you around your house, hoping you’d reach out to him because you needed something, needed him
once he accepted his feelings he decided he needed to play them out on the table as soon as possible
the day it came to confessing to you, he was stressed
wasn’t really sure how it would go, hated the ides of things becoming awkward between the two of you and for your brother to find out the man he trusted with you
he really was stressing over nothing though
it was a little strange for you when you received a message off of eunseok, asking if you could meet him somewhere
you weren’t entirely sure on what he wanted to say to you and in all honesty it made you worry a little bit
did he notice the crush you had on him? was he about to reject you? was he about to tell you to never look in his direction again?
maybe your overthinking was a little extreme
and completely wrong
for some reason eunseok thought the best place to be rejected for his confession was a little cafe near by your house
something about him seemed different when you got there, he was fidgety, couldn’t seem to stay still no matter how hard he tried
“there’s something i need to tell you” you looked over at his, eyes confused and head tilted to the side. you looked so cute, distractingly cute. the pout that formed on your lips as you watched him made me want to lean over and kiss it off of you, he both loved and hated how you made him feel. “is everything okay?” your voice was so gentle, it calmed him. he cleared his throat “yes? uh well i guess it depends how this talk goes” now you really were concerned “i’ll just come out and say it, in the past few months i’ve noticed myself growing feelings for you and i didn’t know what to do about it or how to handle it due to the nature of our relationship and i just didn’t wanna fuck anything up” whatever you had expected him to say, you were dead wrong. you sat in silence for a few moments, those few moments terrified the lost looking boy in front of you. you weren’t mad or upset or anything like that you just weren’t sure on what to say. what do you say when the boy you’ve been pining over for years confesses to you? “i’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable or anything i just-“ “eunseok” he stops speaking, eyes darting to yours, entire body relaxing instantly at your next words “where are we going for our first date?”
he was smitten right from the start, he loved spending time with you. although he hated lying and keeping secrets from your brother, you were worth it
the dates he took you on were simple but intimate
he realised he couldn’t do anything too big without your brother noticing, he had already been questioning him about him seeing someone, already noticing the change in his behaviour
he noticed it in you too, but decided against commenting on it, already putting the math together in his head, he just wanted the two of you to tell him before he spoke up about it
he wasn’t against the idea of a relationship forming between the two of you, there was no one he trusted more than eunseok, especially when it came to you. he just wanted to watch eunseok sweat and panic for a while
eunseok wanted to ask you to be his before tackling your brother thought
boy already adored you and didn’t wanna wait too long before securing your relationship, so he didn’t
only a few dates had passed before his hands found themselves sitting on your hips and his eyes trained on yours, looking down at you like you held everything he could ever want
wanted to be sweet with it but couldn’t stop himself from just asking you, wanting to be able to call himself your boyfriend as soon as possible
“would it be too soon to ask you if you’d be mine?” his fingers rubbed small circles into your hips, yours played with the bottom on his hair, you wanted to humour him “hmmmm i don’t knowww” you dragged out your words, laughing a little as he rolled his eyes, but your demeanor turned serious after “but if you think it’s not too soon seokkie, i wouldn’t be opposed to it” he smile and pulled you. a little closer to his, lips ghosting over the skin of your cheek “in that case, be mine?” “happily”
what he’s like as a boyfriend
he adores you and everything you do
he’s the walking definition of domestic dominance
just wants to take care of you in every way that he possibly can
it’s the small things that matter, standing and sitting close to you when you’re doing mundane things, always having an eye on you when you’re out and about, hand on your lower back when you’re walking past people, even leaning over you to put your seatbelt on when you’re in his car
you don’t ask him to do any of these things and you never fail to get flustered when he does them
he just wants you to be safe and happy and content and will always be prepared to do what he needs to do in order to make that happen
his ideal date is just laying in bed with you in his arms, starting with watching whatever film or show netflix has decided to offer the two of you and ending with you making out under the covers and giggling against each others lips
he embraces any form of intimacy and gentleness that he can get with you, especially out of the way of the other boys. wants you to himself, just for him to enjoy
he does enjoy the occasional date outdoors, usually during the night. something about being under the stars with you is so peaceful and comforting
likes to wrap his arm around your waist and hold you against his side as you walk, always taking precaution to glance around before leaning forward to kiss you
eunseok is not too fond of pda, he adores touching you, kissing you, holding you in his arms but he’s a little less willingly to do it around other people
not out of embarrassment, but more so out of wanting to keep his privacy with you
in private he’s very touchy, hands always on you, all over you. everywhere.
he loves forehead kisses, will find any excuse he can to hold you in his arms whilst you’re laying down and press a gentle kiss to your forehead before resting his own head on yours. it’s so comforting and intimate. for him, it’s a kiss that says both everything and nothing at the same time
boyfriend eunseok would give you anything you wanted and more if you let him.
arguments with him
eunseok can be quite nonchalant about a lot of things, he doesn’t enjoy arguing with you but he’s not the most outwardly emotional about it either.
he’s cold, he doesn’t necessarily mean to be, especially when it comes to you, but that’s how he is by nature so it’s not uncommon for you to assume he doesn’t care when you’re upset about something. even more so when it’s something that he’s done.
but he does care, often finds himself stuck in his own thought once he realises he’s hurt or upset you.
sometimes he’ll realise mid argument and try to fix it but he finds himself making it worse, often accidentally saying things like wrong.
most arguments usually end with him holding you, stroking your hair and kissing you’re head until you’ve calmed down, whispering the sweetest words in your ear about how you mean the world to him and how he’d never want to upset you.
if you’re the one who’s upset him then he just doesn’t know how to act.
he knows you’d never hurt him intentionally but sometimes he finds himself overthinking things you’ve said to him, getting into his own head and beating himself up over it.
he loves you and he’ll hear you out when you apologise. he might seem a little distant and off during it but once you curl your fingers around his hand and tell him how much you love him he tends to come back to the ground.
letting you wrap your arms around him and tell him sweet words, comforting him
at the end of the day he loves you more than anything and he’s ready to work through any argument the two of you have. he thinks you’re worth it.
his love langue
quality time and physical touch are his.
he loves spending time with you, just sitting and talking or playing games or anything. as long as he’s with you it doesn’t matter to him what you do.
he values all of his time with you, you’re his favourite person so he treasures everything.
if you’re around other people he always finds himself gravitating toward you, hand in yours or arm round your waist.
thinks the way you’re happy to just sit and play with his fingers whilst he talks to his friend is cute.
he also loves touching you, having his arms around you, holding your hand. anything that lets him having skin to skin contact with you.
his favourite times are when you’re sat together, arms wrapped around each other playing a game or watching something, he gets to spend time with you and have fun as well as have you in his arms.
lowkey bullying too. lovingly.
he’s teasing, taunting, mocking, he’ll make light hearted jokes to you.
genuinely gets slightly upset if you don’t find them funny because you’re his girlfriend and you’re supposed to find everything he says funny, those are his words.
it’s all with love though, teasing you when you get flustered around by him, taunting you when you lose against him in your favourite game and mocking you when you ask him for something as simple as a kiss.
he always finds your reactions to be the cutest thing, loving the way you whine and pretend to be mad at him.
knows he’ll always get your attention back on him when he starts littering kisses on your neck and telling you i’m so sorry baby, a hint of amusement in his voice.
what he’s like in bed
dominant. it’s very rare that he’s not. eunseok just loves taking control, loves having power over you.
thinks having you at his mercy, a wreck under him is the ideal way to spend the night. especially when you’re crying out his name as he fucks himself into you.
he can be mean, you’ve found yourself bent over his knee, counting the slaps he makes against your ass countless times.
he just likes when you’re good for him, loves his good girl more than anything and needs to put you in your place when you’re a brat.
has no issue in putting you in your place either.
very rarely will he drop the dominant act, but sometimes he will.
no power play sex with eunseok is the sweetest, softest thing you’ll ever find yourself doing.
he holds you so softly as he fucks you, whispers the sweetest words in your ear, moans so prettily as you clench around him.
constantly reminding you about how much he loves you, cums so deep inside of you just to be sure you take all of it.
on the flip side, he can be rough.
he loves forced eye contact, making you look at him whilst he fucks you senseless.
but he also loves pressing you face down ass up and fucking you till you’re crying, god he loves it when you cry.
the way you look, the sound, everything is so beautiful, even more so because it’s coming from you.
you’re just his everything and he makes sure to treat you and fuck you as such.
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Your Mihawk has me weak on my knees so I wanted to request something for him.
S/O has scars on her body, mainly on arms. She does fight but some of them look… too precise. One time after she loses a fight she is really pissed and nervous, she goes to a place alone. There he sees her just giving herself a scar with a knife on her arm. Turns out she was taught scars are signs of losses and if she doesn't get one in battle then afterwards she needs to do it herself. That's why she's so determined to always win. She hates scars.
@patisilence tagging since I'm not sure if you'll get this since I had to save it as a draft to format everything right.
Anyway.
I DID IT I ACTUALLY FINISHED IT
I'M SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG 😭😭
And I honestly really really want to thank you. This is my first ever fic-request, for one.
And also, writing this has been an absolute emotional rollercoaster. I have kind of a personal history with self-harm and I wanted to depict it as realistically as possible. Which resulted in heavy focus on character development, which resulted in this practically turning into a novella. I'm going to split it up into a few chapters to streamline things and link them all in this post.
If I do it right, then the entire thing should already be posted when I post this, but I'm still pretty new to Tumblr so bear with me. Each chapter should be between 3k-4k words.
And ALSO ALSO I've been planning a longer Mihawk X OC fic, and I really hope you don't mind me using this concept for it? Because it honestly ties a lot of things together for me
Soooooo without further ado, here's the whole author note thing.
Your Scars Are Mine
Ch. 1
LA! Mihawk X AFAB!Reader
Tags: Fluff, Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Graphic Mentions of Violence, I guess that's it, I'm bad at this
⚠️ MASSIVE ASS TRIGGER WARNINGS⚠️ : Self-harm, Blood, Implied PTSD
Summary: In the few months that he has known you, Mihawk has noticed the scars on your arm. You've refused to talk about them and skirted around the subject successfully, but a trip to Shells Town throws everything out into the open in a way that neither of you were prepared for.
Ch. 2
Ch.3
You were hiding something.
In the few months that Mihawk had known you, he had come to learn a fair bit about you. He knew, for instance, that you had over the past few years made something of a name for yourself as a sword for hire, typically among pirate crews who required a more discreet touch.
That this reputation of yours had led the Buggy Pirates to hire you to assist in stealing a map of the Grand Line from a Marine base in Shells Town. You had failed to procure the map before it was stolen by other hands, leaving you in their debt. Buggy had sunk your sloop to prevent your escape, and you had gotten stuck working for the ridiculous crew for a brief time, remained stuck with them until the Strawhat upstarts offered you passage with them.
Mihawk knew you had traveled with them as far as Baratie, where you had crossed his own path for the first time at the bar on the ship's deck. Where you had approached him with a bargain—if he left Roronoa Zoro alive after their duel the following morning, you would serve him for a year, an errand girl to send off on whatever menial tasks the World Government assigned him.
"And why would I want a little bird flitting around after me around for an entire year?" Mihawk had asked coolly.
And yet you had made a fair point—acting as a government lapdog was growing old. He had been sent after the vice admiral's grandson, for heavens' sake, as if he had nothing better to do with his time than to handle the old fool's family disputes.
Though the surly pirate warlord wouldn't have dared to dream of admitting it at the time, you had his attention. Your offer of unquestioned devotion, your confident demeanor as you sipped a glass of whiskey and kept your eyes on his without showing an ounce of fear or intimidation. You were certainly an interesting diversion from the otherwise dull task that had been laid before him, and your certainty that he would accept your offer had irritated and intrigued him in near equal measure.
It was intrigue that won out in the end. He had left his challenger clinging to the edge of life and taken you with him on his departure. You stayed toe to toe with him in wit and banter, and that alone would have been more than enough to draw him closer to your charm. He had wanted you before two weeks were out, wanted to claim you as far more than his "errand girl," and it was easy to see from the way you effortlessly returned his subtle flirtations that you wanted the same.
And now you were lying back across his broad chest in the hammock aboard your new sloop, a book open over your chest and his hand resting over your stomach, his other tucked under his neck as he frowned thoughtfully up at the roof of the small ship's cabin, pondering over the whirlwind of events that had led up to this moment.
It had been just over two months since the pirate lord had taken you as his lover, and you had been an open book about most things. Your training under your grandmother. Your setting out on your own from a small island village to find your parents, or some clue of their disappearance. The many and varied pirate crews you had served as a hired hand.
Yet you refused to discuss your scars.
Any seafarer with a history as sordid as your own had their share of battle scars. Mihawk had a fair few of his own; one didn't become the most renowned swordsman in the world without a few losses, after all. Yet your voice turned to clear contempt when yours were mentioned, even in passing, and you tensed like a statue when his hands brushed over them. You were confident to the point of near arrogance, yet you clearly held nothing but shame and contempt for the many marks that marred your delicate skin.
Some of which appeared oddly...uniform, for having been gained in battle.
It was in part—in great measure, honestly—the mystery of you that had drawn him in to begin with, and this was just another mystery that Mihawk intended to unravel.
You closed your book abruptly, stirring him from his thoughts as he glanced down at you. He watched you gaze thoughtfully toward the ceiling for a long moment, your hand resting over his at your stomach, before you finally spoke up.
"Reading a book is just staring at a dead tree and vividly hallucinating."
You tilted your head back, grinning as his mouth turned down in a frown and his brow furrowed at your ridiculous statement. Mihawk sighed wearily, plucking the book from your hands and lightly rapping you over the forehead with it.
"No," he scolded, as you giggled softly. He sighed heavily again, dropping the book over the back of the hammock before pinching at the bridge of his nose. "Are you trying to give me a stroke?"
"No," you said, imitating his scolding tone. You stretched your arms out over your head, arching your back for a moment, before rolling over to lay across his chest and brush your lips to his. "But it's fun seeing the look on your face."
"You irritate my very soul, little one," he said, shaking his head as he wrapped his arms around your waist.
"And I enjoy every second of it," you countered, grinning as you laid your forehead against his.
"I can tell."
Your grin managed to draw a small smile from him, before he lifted a hand into your hair and pulled you down into a slow, deep kiss. Your fingertips came to rest at his broad shoulders, the hammock swaying slowly in the steady ocean waves carrying the ship along. He knew as well as you did that he wasn't honestly irritated—your strange sense of humor had grown on him, as starkly as it contrasted to his dry sarcasm, and he rarely had the pleasure of meeting anyone as adept at keeping up with his own banter.
You lay your cheek at his shoulder when your lips parted, your eyes slipping shut and your contented sigh tickling against his neck.
"If the wind holds steady it will be a few hours before we make port," you said, your voice low and soft. "I suggest we don't move from here in the meantime."
"I'm not sure I've ever heard a finer suggestion."
Mihawk pulled one of your hands to his lips, brushing a kiss across your knuckles. He pulled his hat down over his eyes to block out the sun pouring through the windows of the small cabin, tucked his hand back behind his neck again, and shifted beneath you to get comfortable as he closed his eyes. His arm remained curled around your waist, his hand slipping just beneath the hem of your shirt so his thumb could rub slow circles over your soft skin as you both drifted off toward the peaceful recess of sleep.
The first thing that struck Mihawk when he woke was that you weren't in his arms.
Every day and night for nearly two months, he had fallen asleep and woken with you against him, and the absence of your warmth jarred him instantly awake and aware. His eyes scanned around his surroundings as he sat up, taking in where he was—the small cabin of the sloop he had recently bought you as a replacement for the one Buggy's crew had sunk.
His sharp yellow eyes darted toward the door, taking in the sound of unfamiliar, muffled voices outside the cabin.
He was standing in an instant, straightening his hat and pulling Yoru onto his back as he slipped silently through the door and onto the small deck of the sloop.
There was another sloop tethered to yours.
A pair of no-name pirates holding you against the bow ny your arms, their captain pressing the barrel of his pistol to your forehead as they bickered.
"There has to be something on board."
"We could just take her. Looks like she's probably a feisty little thing."
"Still have to check the cabins. Could be—"
Mihawk cleared his throat.
The trio turned their heads in almost comedic synchrony, their jaws dropping at the mere sight of him leaning against the door of the cabin. Mihawk's eyes flickered from them to you, and you averted your eyes, clearly ashamed to be seen in such a compromising situation.
So he shifted his gaze back to the opposing pirates, his eyes flickering between each of them.
"You will remove your hands from the girl or I will gladly remove them for you," he said levelly, lifting his eyebrows.
They quickly let go of your arms, and stepped away when he moved forward to wrap a hand around your wrist and pull you to him. He curled his arm around your waist, lowering his head over yours for a moment and murmuring quietly, "Are you hurt?"
You shook your head no quickly, your jaw set at a rigid angle as you turned your gaze down to your feet, your shoulders tense. He pressed a light kiss to your temple for a long moment before lifting his gaze back to the trio that had dared board your ship, his eyes narrowing in an unspoken threat.
"Go." They remained frozen, glancing between each other. "Now."
They scrambled back over to their ship immediately, severing the ropes that were tethering it to yours. Mihawk kept his arm around you, but his eyes remained trained onto the opposing sloop as it drifted away on the wind, debating on just drawing his sword and splitting it in half on the spot.
He turned his attention back down to you when you began to pull away from him. He pulled you in close again, frowning. It wasn't at all like you to be bested by a few no-names, and it was clear that you weren't taking it very well.
"Tell me what happened," he said finally.
"I woke up," you said curtly. "Thought I'd check the charts and see how far we were from Shells Town. They were already on the deck. Seemed to think this was a small merchant vessel since there's no flag. I'd left my knives in the cabin and I was still half asleep when I came out here. By the time I registered what was going on, one of them had a pistol to my head."
You really weren't making a very good case for him to not sink their boat. He cut his eyes briefly toward the sloop before looking back down at you, your face shadowed by your hair as you stared down at the deck floor.
"Their captain started questioning me about cargo," you continued. "Told them there wasn't anything valuable on board. They were discussing taking me as compensation." You sighed heavily. "And that's when you chose to enter stage left and take approximately twenty years off the end of their lives."
He rolled his eyes the slightest bit at your quip. "I would have taken a great deal more than that had they hurt you."
"Well, they didn't," you replied, your voice still curt. Mihawk lifted an eyebrow. "And it's perhaps best not to go splitting any boats in half a stone's throw away from a naval base," you added, nodding back toward the bow of the vessel.
Mihawk gave a quick glance as well. He had been too focused on the fiasco he had just awoken to to notice that Shells Town was visible on the horizon now. It wasn't as if the Marines could do much about it if he did sink the sloop, but you were right—it would still be more of a hassle than it was worth. He sighed, shaking his head a little, and curled a hand under your chin to lift your gaze to his. You still kept your eyes averted, your jaw set. He hadn't seen you lose a fight before—apart from sparring with him while training, but that hardly counted.
You had proven to be quite the fighter when he had decided to test you. You were nowhere near his equal, but you knew precisely how to play to your strengths with your pair of daggers and your throwing knives. Your stature made you difficult to target even in single combat, your movements a graceful dance that toed the line between evasion and power.
Yet one loss—and a rather inconsequential loss, at that—and you were beating yourself up over it quite a great deal more than what constituted normalcy. Mihawk wasn't sure whether to scold you for being dramatic or attempt to comfort you.
"You were caught off guard, little one," he said after a long moment, brushing a thumb across your cheek. "There's no need to be so upset over that."
"I'm not upset, I'm annoyed," you retorted, pursing your lips a little. "Blades or no, I should have been able to take care of those idiots."
"Annoyed, then," he allowed with a small sigh. "And I've no doubt you would have had I not woke. I was simply able to handle it a bit more...subtly."
"Oh, yes, because sauntering out onto the deck with a giant sword and threatening to cut off their hands was so subtle," you said, your voice dripping with sarcasm as you finally rolled your eyes over to his, lifting your eyebrows.
"Don't be a brat," he chided lightly. "We still have at least half an hour before we make port." Mihawk abruptly wrapped his hand around your chin and pressed his lips to yours in a brief, deep kiss that made you draw in a sharp breath. He parted just as you started to lean into it, resting his forehead against yours. He lowered his voice to an intimate murmur. "I would truly hate to have to spend it punishing you, my little bird."
You quirked an eyebrow, your lips curving in a small, coy smirk. "No you wouldn't."
He gave you a thoughtful frown and a small shrug of his shoulder. "Perhaps not." You let out a small cry of alarm when he stooped down and quickly scooped you up from the deck floor, one arm beneath your knees and his other curled around your back. "I suppose we'll just have to find out."
You chuckled lightly as he carried you to the door of the main cabin, plucking his hat off of his head and placing it on your own as you brushed your lips to his in a soft, teasing manner. Mihawk lifted his eyebrows when you nipped lightly at his bottom lip.
"You're really pushing your luck, my dear," he cautioned.
He lowered you down to the double bed in the cabin, his thumb rubbing small circles at the back of your neck. You lifted yourself onto your elbows, your lips nearly brushing his before he pulled back just far enough to stop you, lightly gripping your hair at the nape of your neck to keep you from sitting up any higher. You gave a small whine of protest, but didn't try to struggle against his grip—you and he both knew there was no point.
"Lie down." His voice remained low and intimate, but there was a subtle command in his tone, in the way his gaze burned into your own. You bit your bottom lip lightly, lowering yourself back down onto the bed fully. A soft, quivering sigh left your lips as he slowly began slipping the buttons down the front of your shirt loose. "Hands over your head. And you don't move them an inch until I tell you you can."
"Mmm..." You hummed thoughtfully, and Mihawk paused in unbuttoning your shirt as you lifted your arms from the bed, holding your hands high above you, straight up in the air. "I think my arms might end up getting tired."
Your lips pursed a little, clearly struggling to keep a straight face, and he lifted an eyebrow at you. "You're certainly in rare form today."
Mihawk wrapped his hand around both of your wrists, shoving your hands down into the plush white comforter over your head, and a couple giggles escaped you before you bit your lip again. It was honestly a bit endearing, how cheeky you were being—and all the moreso, as it appeared you were being so brazen just so he could have his fun with your punishment.
You were enticing him more and more every passing day, beyond the physical desire that had led him to claim you as his a couple months ago. It wasn't a feeling he was particularly accustomed to, nor was he quite sure what to make of it yet. He knew only that when he had seen you held captive against the bow of the boat, an emotion had flashed through him for a moment that he hadn't experienced in years.
For the briefest moment, Dracule Mihawk had felt fear.
He was not ready to contend with the connotations of that.
And he was a bit too busy at the moment, anyway. He let his forehead touch yours, his lips hovering a breath away from your own.
"You don't move your hands," he repeated, tilting his head to just barely graze his lips against your neck, drawing a small moan from your lips, "until I give you permission. Understood?"
"Yes, sir..." you sighed softly, your eyes slipping shut as he kissed down your collarbone, pushing your shirt open. His hand released your wrists and trailed down your arms, down to knead at the soft tissue of your breast through the sheer lace of your bra, feeling your nipple harden against his palm. He tugged the cups down, just a bit too hard given he felt one of them tear in his grasp, but that was a problem for later, not now.
You gasped out when he briefly pulled one of your stiff nipples into his mouth, his grip tightening slightly around your ribcage as you arched your chest toward his swirling tongue. His gaze flicked up to watch you writhe and shudder under his touch, your fingers digging into the bedsheets behind you, your hands searching for anything to keep occupied with.
"Very good," he praised, lifting a hand to brush a few strands of hair out of your eyes and brushing his lips to your jaw. "You see?" He wrapped his hand around your jaw and lightly pressed his lips to yours. "It's much better when you're a good little bird, isn't it?"
"This—doesn't feel much like a punishment," you commented, gasping softly as he circled the pad of his thumb around your nipple, lightly skimming across it once or twice.
"Yet," he corrected.
And gave you a small, devilish smirk, before lowering his head and biting down on the tender skin at the crook of your neck. Just hard enough to leave behind a small bruise, to draw a sharp cry from your lips and send a shiver through your body.
He straightened out as you heaved a sigh, standing over you. Your eyes remained glued to him while he shrugged away his long coat and tossed it back into a chair behind him, noting how your hands tightened down on the bedsheets again.
"Remember we still have a half an hour before we reach Shells Town." His fingertips curled around the waist of your shorts, the lace of your panties beneath them, and slowly inched them down your hips. "I could spend the entirety of it teasing you." Mihawk noted the movement in your throat as you swallowed in nervous anticipation, your eyes glued to his as he pulled them up the length of your legs and off, flinging them aside. "Making you beg for release but never allowing you the satisfaction."
How beautiful it was that it only took a few words to pull a blush to your cheeks and make your breath hitch. He brushed a light kiss to your calf and pushed your legs apart, rubbing his palms up your inner thighs.
"You're going to have to be on your best behavior if you want more, my sweet little bird." Trailing a single finger up your soft folds, dragging through your slick arousal and across your clit, pulling a small whimper from your lips. "Or would you rather I just torment you?"
You bit your lip, shaking your head quickly, your eyes flickering between his eyes and his fingertips trailing up. It was a struggle for him not to chuckle at you—always just cheeky enough to be amusing, but you knew the pleasure he could give you, were so desperate for it that you folded like a cheap deck of cards under his slightest touch.
Absolutely perfect.
Mihawk moved his hands up from your thighs, curling an arm under your back to lift you up and shift you further back on the bed. Your breathing was ragged with anticipation as he brushed his lips to your stomach, trailing his hands back down to your hips, his lips lower and lower, grazing slowly across the soft skin between your hip bones.
Shifting lower and dragging his tongue slowly up your slit, circling the sensitive bud at the apex, giving a quiet growl of approval as your breathy, shuddering moans filled the small cabin and your hips arched in his hands.
His gaze turned up toward your face, watching you draw closer to falling apart with every passing moment. This was only the beginning, and he still hadn't decided if he was going to give you what you wanted...but the sight of your divine, nearly naked and writhing under his touch with his hat still resting on your head made him just a little weak.
He moved from between your legs before he could get lost in the sight of you and the sweet sounds of your moans, reveling in the agonized whimper that left you as he trailed his mouth back up your stomach.
Across to your ribs, pausing at your breasts to brush his lips and his skilled tongue across your sensitive nipples.
Dragging his tongue up the column of your throat, seizing a fistful of your hair and crushing his lips to yours in a deep, possessive kiss, shoving your hip down onto the mattress to keep you from grinding against him, shifting his hand between your thighs to circle a finger around your tight entrance without pushing in. Your low moans and whines of protest were like music to his ears, your knuckles gone white from the force with which you gripped at the sheets over your head to keep your hands from wandering.
Every slow pass up and down your body brought you closer to the peak of pleasure but never quite there—and brought him closer and closer to caving in and giving it to you. He had to wonder whether you had any idea just how much of a temptation you were to him. It had been years since the pirate lord had allowed any woman to affect him quite as strongly as you had.
How much time had passed couldn't be ascertained for sure when he reached his breaking point—his mouth pressed into the crook of your neck while you moaned and begged desperately in his ear, one of his hands squeezing your breast hard enough to bruise the soft flesh while his other worked his belt buckle open and shoved his pants down his hips in a desperation that rivaled yours.
He shoved your open shirt up your shoulders and arms and flung it away; gripped one of your thighs, pushing your leg up as high as it would go, and the low growl that left his throat as he thrust into you was drowned out by your own cries of abandon. Your hips arched up from the bed to meet his, one of your arms flinging around his neck and your hooking beneath his arm to grip hard at his shoulder.
"I don't recall giving you permission to move," he breathed into your neck. He gritted his teeth as he pushed his hips forward hard, shoving yours back down into the bed as you cried out again, your slick walls tightening around his cock.
"I—I'm sorry, I can't—I can't—please—" You gasped, your head falling back as he moved in you in deep, hard thrusts, your fingernails dragging down his back. "Oh God, please—"
He lifted a hand to grasp at your hair as he crushed his lips to yours, delving his tongue into your mouth and drawing in a deep breath as you moaned desperately into the fierce kiss. The prospect of punishing you, of what the hell he had even been punishing you for was forgotten in this rush of unquenchable lust and desire, of pure carnal need for your body.
He normally hated losing control, but this was on another level entirely. There was no room to hate this, no room for anything but pure pleasure, for getting lost inside you as your walls tightened around his cock, as every muscle in his groin tensed and tightened in anticipation of impending release—
Your lips breaking away from his, your cry of abandon as your climax swept over you pulled him right over the edge with you. He pulled your hip up from the bed to slam into you as he came, gritting his teeth against a low groan, the rhythmic contractions of your tight channel milking him dry. His hips jerked toward yours with each intense wave of pleasure, fingers tangling in your hair as he pressed his lips to your neck, the two of you shuddering and tangled together over the bedsheets.
Mihawk heaved a shuddering sigh into the crook of your neck, his fingers tangled in your hair as he brushed his thumb across your temple. Maybe it was the lingering euphoria, but he didn't even think about the next words that left his mouth before he heard them himself.
"God dammit, (Y/N), I love you."
But it was impossible to deny any longer. You really were everything he had never realized he craved. No, it wasn't just the euphoria in the moment—it was that brief flash of fear earlier at the thought of you being hurt, at the thought of losing you. The utter fury at the morons who had briefly held you captive. How perfectly you balanced and complemented his desires.
He felt as much as heard you draw in a small gasp beneath him. "Y—you—wh—?"
"You heard me," Mihawk interrupted your quiet, almost cautious stammering, murmuring against your neck. He brushed his lips against one of the small, round bruises he had left on the soft skin, and said it again, quietly, "I love you."
You were quiet for a long moment, but he wasn't concerned, still trailing kisses up the side of your neck. He had seen it in your eyes before now, heard it in the softness of your voice when you lay against him, your fingers in his hair and your lips brushing his.
Several seconds passed, before you turned your head slowly and pressed your lips to his, tentatively at first, and then deepening the slow kiss with a soft sigh. He shifted onto his side, tugging you to him by your hip. Your forehead came to rest against his as your lips drifted apart, still barely a breath away, your eyes closed, your voice a quiet whisper.
"I...love you."
(Ch. 2)
#opla#one piece fanfiction#dracule mihawk#fanfic#mihawk one piece#mihawk opla#fluff#mihawk x reader#smut
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