#wish I could've had the time to do it all

[adieutristana]

Could you do a second part of the request for Sevica's niece x Jinx? I would love to know what happened with Reader and Powder

Please 💞

of course! thank you for the request <3

i’m no longer quarantined (yaaaay!) but that means back to regular posting pace, sorry :( hope u guys enjoyed 4 fics in half a week.

this is a part 2 to this fic! this will be the final part of this story, i hope it's not obvious but i was struggling with the direction

characters included; jinx, powder (act iii au), sevika (familial), ekko (platonic)

summary; you and powder make amends, though you know that you have to get back to your universe.

tags/warnings; fluff, hurt/comfort, s2 spoilers, mentions of drinking and smoking, powder majority of the story, angsty in the beginning, jinx at the end, brief arguing, universe hopping or whatever that's called, happy bonus at the end

men dni.

"all done,"

you smile, putting your hands out behind powder in a grand gesture that says 'ta-da.' pink ribbons adorn azure locks, carefully woven into both of her twin braids. a nod to the pink streak through her hair, and frankly- she looks beautiful. you don't want to stroke your ego, but you did a damn good job.

tension still hangs in the air, but seems to slowly slip with every second that passes. powder's jealousy is on the backburner for now as she looks over her hair in the mirror, her eyes curious. the sight is bittersweet. she looks happy, enamored with her new hair. a smile is tugging at the corners of powder's glossed lips, and those blue eyes are looking up at yours with such merriness. the braiding seemed to do the trick.

though the twin braids bring you back to jinx, your jinx. it's a delicate balance, a sort of tug-of-war in your mind. on one hand, this powder looks genuinely happy. she isn't the broken down girl you know and love. her cheeks are fuller, her skin has more color to it, she's taller, her smiles are more frequent, and they're real. the version of you whose body you're occupying clearly loves her, and she clearly loves this alternate you in return.

you love her back, at least you think you do. this is still jinx, just... less tortured. or rather, jinx is the distortion of powder. it's confusing, really, and you don't think you can spend too much time thinking about it before your brain starts to hurt.

you could grow used to this, if you allowed yourself to. but you knew you couldn't, not when jinx was waiting on you. probably worrying herself absolutely sick. you'd promised your girlfriend you'd be back soon, a few hours tops. but it'd been much longer than that by now, the next morning having come and gone.

you knew jinx and how she thought. she'd probably fully convinced herself by now that you were gone. that you'd disappeared into the lanes or maybe even piltover to find yourself someone better, just to leave her to wither. no matter how many times you swore to the girl that you would never, the insecurities still lingered in the back of her mind. they were likely at the forefront now.

"damn, i look... good," powder starts, pulling you out of your daze. she lets out a light chuckle, a mix of a gasp and laugh. "never thought i'd see you play hairstylist, but you did pretty great."

you give a gentle smile in return, situating yourself behind powder in the mirror and draping your arms around her waist. you place your chin on her shoulder her smile widens and she gives a satisfied 'hmm' sound, powder's head leading to the side against yours. a picture-perfect couple if you've ever seen one.

but it isn't real. at least, this iteration isn't. part of you wishes it was, wishes that you had something with the powder you knew as a little girl. in a zaun better than you could've ever imagined. you wished so badly that this is who powder became in your world, instead of jinx; as much as you loved her. but no matter. 'no use in dwelling,' your aunt would tell you in times like these.

though you knew that wasn't the case, and the other part of you felt that this was wrong. even though you're in her place, you're not the one powder loves- not really. a different version of her, sure, but you can't help feeling like you're lying to powder.

yet, what are you supposed to do? tell her the truth, that you'd somehow ended up in a parallel universe where things were remarkably better than the one you'd come from? that the version of her you knew and loved had been mistreated and neglected for much of her teenage years, only to go on to become a pyromaniac? that zaun had somehow moved backwards?

you nuzzle closer to powder's touch, the scent of strawberry shampoo and fruity perfume filling your senses. you supposed you could keep this charade going for a little longer, at least until you figured out how to return to your home universe.

the way powder is looking at you through your shared reflection and smiling, so at peace, you know that this isn't all bad. you may not be the one powder knows, but you can act the part. you can make her happy. you can indulge for a little bit.

"somethin' on your mind, babe?"

she asks, her smile unwavering. you shake your head in response, your grip around her waist tightening the slightest bit.

"no, just looking at you." you hum. "you look beautiful right now, you know."

"oh yeah? what about the rest of the time?"

powder reaches behind her to playfully poke your side, earning a short giggle from you. you shake your head in mock resignation, giving an amused huff.

"you look great all the time. i just happen to think i enhanced that beauty a bit."

you chuckle. powder rolls her eyes, her smile never faltering.

"miss humble over here. braided my hair once, and now her ego's off the charts."

she jests. you're quickly coming to recognize these playful jabs as a way the girl shows affection. it's not far off from jinx at all. but still, this moment of holding powder from behind, feeling the quiet warmth of her body against yours and seeing that smile in the mirror. you wish that you could freeze this moment in time, frame it even. capture it so that it never slips away from you. though again, you know this won't last. it can't.

✧.*

"any developments?"

"we've got... something."

ekko offers, his tone more resigned than you'd hope to hear right now. you let out an exasperated sigh, your gaze falling to the ground of the dank alleyway. though you raise your hand and wave off, a gesture to urge your friend to continue.

"heimerdinger and i are trying to work on a time machine. something that can rewind time a little, maybe even bring us back."

he says, though he sounds uncertain. you can't say you blame him, necessarily. this entire situation is so confusing.

"when will it be done?"

you ask, eyes wide and looking into his as a sort of silent plea. a heavy sigh escapes ekko, and he slowly shakes his head.

"i don't know. i'm sorry, just... these things take time."

"i don't have time." you plead. "jinx is probably back home, already convinced that i up and left. hell, she's probably figuring out some kind of revenge plot while we're talking."

any other time, those words would be a joke, but now your tone is anything but joking. you know deep in you that jinx is a wreck right now, even if you're not physically with her. not to mention your aunt, not to mention the way of life that you're used to.

"i'm sure she is. and the firelights probably aren't doing much better."

it's true, they're most likely not. no hextech here, no firelights, no jinx, no shimmer ravaging the streets. from the outside looking in, you two would be seen as idiots to have something so good, and want to throw it away for the fucked-up place you'd come from. but jinx was too important to you, ekko's work too important to him. you pause. you'd been sleeping at powder's, but with the absence of the tree and bases in this version of zaun, you couldn't help but worry for your friend.

"where are you staying, by the way?"

"on campus at the academy. the dorms are pretty nice, actually. there's a kitchen, laundry room, and lounge in the building, so i'm all set."

you nod slowly. you should've figured, with him being one of the academy's most esteemed inventors in this world. but still, it was nice to hear that he wasn't just sleeping on benzo's couch.

"you're staying with powder?"

"nope. i'm an apartment owner here, apparently."

"no shit," he breathes out, a bewildered expression on the boy's face. neither of you could've imagined having your own space in zaun of all places, so to know that it was possible.. wow.

silence hangs in the air for a moment, and you're not sure what else could be used to fill it. what else is there to talk about, really? the impending sense of dread both of you have, or the lingering anxiety that you'll be trapped in this reality forever?

"just... keep me updated, okay?" you sigh. "i just want to get back and tell jinx that everything is okay. no matter how nice all of this is."

"when we make progress, you'll be the first to know. we're getting somewhere, i promise. it's in the beginning stages, but i can't do anything when i don't have the means yet." he pauses. "you understand."

you do understand. you don't necessarily have room to not understand right now. he still looks uncertain, but he's giving you a gentle smile in an attempt to reassure you. it doesn't do much for your nerves necessarily, but it's a kind gesture regardless. now all there is to do is wait. gods, you hated waiting, but what other choice did you have?

you quickly exchange addresses in the case of developments or an emergency, before parting.

✧.*

powder had told you to meet her at her hideout, instead of her apartment. that's something that hadn't changed, at least. even in this universe, powder had found and made use of the wind turbine structure you'd see jinx turn into her home. it was different, of course, there were railings around the metal blades.

the decorations were easier on the eyes, much more inviting. although it was still very true to her usual chaotic manner, with messy decorations strewn across the space. her signature crude drawings decorate her dresser, her desk, old makeup palettes scattered around anywhere that'll house them.

but the most striking difference was the altar set up on one of the platforms, dedicated to vi. her big sister, who you'd seen alive and well just days prior. only in passing, but still. your girlfriend's relationship with her sister was strained at best, a near-fatality at worst. but something told you that if jinx knew her sister was gone in a parallel universe, if she was gone in your universe, she'd be utterly destroyed.

but not powder. powder was still fragile, you could see it in the way her jaw clenched at certain words, the way her eyes flitted when she got in her head. but powder could handle it. she didn't let it consume her, like jinx did. she didn't necessarily have a choice when it came to her state, but it was still an interesting contrast.

"hey, you!" powder beams, throwing her arms around you from behind. she presses a flurry of rushed kisses your jawline and cheek, then ending with a kiss to the corner of your mouth. "took ya long enough! what's with the hold up?"

"sorry, babe. just got a little sidetracked."

you hum, leaning into the touch. you turn around in powder's embrace, looking into those sapphire eyes that could make anyone weak. you capture the girl's lips in a chaste, yet sweet kiss. a fleeting moment, but you put all of the affection that you can into it.

"sidetracked? with what?" she asks. "you're always the focused one."

you purse your lips, and you try to think of a good excuse. you were with ekko is where you where, but you can't tell powder that. not after the outburst she'd had just a day prior. but what if she found out anyways? wouldn't it be better for her to find out from you directly, rather than being told by a bystander?

you'll tell her the truth. she knows you and him are just friends. she knows that.

"i was talking to ekko."

you mutter, and powder's expression immediately hardens. like a switch being flipped, her smile falters, and her grip around you loosens.

"oh."

"powder, we were just talking." you plead, your hand running through your hair.

"yeah. just talking, i know."

she says, although it's clear that she's not fully convinced. she shakes her head, a deep exhale escaping her.

"talking about what, though?"

she asks, and your heart nearly drops. you can't lie to her, not while she's in this state. you've seen it. jinx slips into it more often than you can bear- trying to hold herself together whilst her emotions are threatening to bubble to the surface and explode.

you'd sound like a mad woman if you told her the truth. but what other choice did you have?

"look, pow," you start. "i'm gonna sound batshit crazy when i tell you this. but you have to listen to me."

your tone is stern, a 'no-bullshit' air about you. powder nods slowly in agreement, and waits silently for you to continue.

"i'm not... from here," you begin.

"huh? you've always been in zaun."

she's tilting her head in that confused way, and it's adorable- but you have to focus.

"no, no. i know that," you say, scrambling to find the right words. "i mean... this world. i came from a parallel universe or whatever they call it, and i have no idea how to get back. it's the same with ekko. everything is the same here, but different."

you sigh, pausing to catch your breath as you ramble on. powder's eyebrows are furrowed, yet she doesn't interrupt you. she's listening intently. that's a good start, you suppose.

"i mean, zaun is somewhere livable. people whose corpses i've seen are standing right in front of me, and there's none of that fucked-up tech there is where i come from. and you're different. you're happy, and you're healthy. the version of you that i know is someone i don't think you'd recognize."

your shoulders slump, and you're growing more restless as you talk. it's a word-vomit of sorts. you know you probably sound out of your damn mind to the girl in front of you, but you just can't stop now that you've started.

"and i love her. i really do. and i love you, but it feels like i'm lying to you, because i'm not the me that you love. i'm just in her body right now, and i'm trying to figure out how to give it back."

it’s odd, baring your feelings like this to a girl you simultaneously know like the back of your hand and don’t know at all. if powder was looking at you before, she’s looking through you now.

“…please say something.”

you breathe out. powder presses her lips into a thin line, her gaze finally parting from yours.

“say i believe all of this. say it’s true, and you’re not making up some crazy story to shut me up. if i asked ekko what you were talking about, would he have the same story?”

“yes, powder. he would.”

she lets out a heavy sigh, crossing her arms over her chest. powder’s expression is unreadable at best, though she doesn’t seem angry. just… confused. shocked. in disbelief, maybe even denial. though before you can say much more, there’s a knock at powder’s door.

“i’ll get it,” she mutters, turning over her shoulder. she makes her way to the door slowly, turning the knob and opening it to ekko of all people.

“what are you doing here?”

“here for your girlfriend.��� he says, hoping that’ll suffice. you’d told him that powder was jealous and he’d need to tread lightly, hopefully placing emphasis on the word ‘girlfriend’ would leave a good impression on her. “we just need a minute to talk. i’ll give her right back, i swear.”

powder pauses for a moment, scanning over his expression for any hints of deception or trickery. but as usual, there is none. just someone who wants to have a conversation with her girlfriend, even though that certain someone is one she’s been wary of. she sighs.

“babe, ekko’s here for you!”

she calls out. you make your way to your feet, striding towards the door while your friend comes into view. his demeanor doesn't give anything away, but he typically doesn't just... show up at people's doors. not the ekko you know. so this must be something important. powder steps aside, allowing ekko into the hideout and turns around.

"i'll be here when you're done," she says, glancing over her shoulder before returning to her desk.

ekko gives one more cautious look to the girl, before turning his attention to you.

"right."

you purse your lips, anticipating his next words.

"we've got something. it wasn't easy doing it, and it won't be easy to get back, but we can do it now." he says, his sentences rushed. "we can do it whenever you're ready- now, if you want."

you quirk an eyebrow.

"now?"

"only if you want to."

you shake your head slowly, wordlessly, crossing your arms in contemplation. you'd definitely prefer to get back to jinx as soon as possible, but now you're having second thoughts. god, after all that you'd done and thought about this entire time, now you're having second thoughts? you confuse yourself, you think. but none of this situation makes much sense to begin with.

"i... yeah. sure." you pause, drawing a sharp breath in. "but what happens to the other me? like, the one that's here?"

ekko's eyebrows knit together, and he takes a moment to consider your question. mentally going over everything that he'd gathered, and everything heimerdinger had told him.

"i think we'd go back to how we were- our other selves, i mean. it was just.. us in their bodies for a while, but they'll go back to normal. they should, anyways."

"what if they don't?"

"listen. do you wanna go back, or not?"

god damn, he's right. this is what you've both been wanting from the start, and while you worry for your other self, you have to put this first.

but still. powder. you barely know this version of her, but you know that she's a good person. a smart girl who loves and gives. she deserves to be happy, she deserves the version of you that she knows and loves so dearly. you can only hope that she'll return to powder after you're gone.

"...yeah. let's do it." you murmur. "but i want to say goodbye to powder first."

he nods, and tilts his head in the girl's direction as if to cue you to go on. you manage a weak smile in his direction, before walking over to powder. your heart's beat in your chest is akin to a war drum, ringing in your ears and making your hands shake.

"hey, pow." you sigh, prompting her to turn her head towards you from... drafting blueprints? what exactly is she doing?- doesn't matter right now. "i'm going back. to where i came from, i mean. i'll be gone for a little bit, but.. everything will go back to normal. you'll have your girlfriend back, your real girlfriend, and i'll be in a place i know."

her blue eyes flit downwards, and she frowns. but still, she manages to slowly nod in acknowledgement.

"okay."

is all that she can manage, and she sounds defeated. it breaks your heart, seeing her like this. you step forward, cautiously wrapping your arms around the girl's shoulders in a gentle embrace.

"everything will be okay." you whisper, feeling her arms encircle your waist. "you deserve to be happy, powder."

✧.*

you're back.

oh, shit, you're back.

you spring to your feet, having been planted smack in the middle of a busy zaun street. passersby speed past you, vendors are loudly shouting to advertise their products, and loud music can be heard in the distance.

all that occupies your mind in this moment is jinx, jinx, jinx. anything else- the fact that it feels like you haven't eaten in days, your muscles are sore from whatever the hell that time machine had done to you, or the fact that you feel like you may collapse at any moment from exhaustion are of no significance to you. you have to find you, you have to see her and know that she's okay, tell her that you're okay.

your first stop is jinx's hideout. she's almost always there, running around while tinkering with some new weapon or conspiring her next big job. but as soon as the door swings open, a deafening silence hits you. one that's uncharacteristic for your girlfriend, the only time she's ever quiet is when she's sleeping- and she doesn't get much of that.

you scramble through the different platforms, looking under large structures- lifting up blankets, looking in her cot, her beat-up couches, but there's no trace of the girl.

so you make your way to the lanes, where you figure jinx may be causing destruction. all you find is shimmer dealers and street rats scrounging for scraps.

your last hope is the last drop. jinx doesn't tend to venture much. she wouldn't be in piltover for anything right now, she doesn't walk through zaun's streets to window shop or sightsee. she sticks to her areas of interest, occasionally venturing out to tag walls, fight, or look for materials. if she wasn't there, you couldn't begin to think of where she would be. you didn't want to think of that.

you push the heavy door of the tavern open, immediately struck with the smell of liquor and stench of smoke, the sound of patrons chatting away and playing card games in the company of friends.

you scan the bar counter, the tables, the bits of the kitchen you can see, but she isn't here either. you can hardly believe what you're seeing. nine times out of ten, jinx is somewhere within the confines of these locations you've searched, but it's as if she's vanished.

however, you do see a familiar face- that of your aunt. tucked away in a dark corner of the bar at a small wooden table, filling out a stack of paperwork.

"sevika."

you start, a brow quirked and your arms crossed.

"not even an 'aunt' at beginning?" sevika jests, not looking up from the papers in front of her. she's scribbling something away, likely to do with the late silco's businesses, but no matter. you don't have time to ask what she's up to, and frankly you don't care either.

"where is she?" you demand, taking a seat across from the woman. "i've looked in the hideout, the lanes, and now here, but she's nowhere."

"where were you?" sevika bites back. the flips to another page, the pen scratching against paper almost obnoxiously. you wince at her tone, slowly shrinking into yourself- though you can't exactly explain that to her.

"that's a long story. a lot happened."

you sigh, bracing your elbows on the wood before you.

"spare me no details," she says, sarcasm lacing her words. "she's worried sick. jinx was asking me all yesterday and the night before where you were, what you were doing, because she'd heard nothing from you. but i didn't know anything, and i still don't. you're grown now, and you can handle yourself. but as your aunt, i'm supposed to know these things. by the way," she pauses, her gaze lifting to meet yours.

"walking out on a girl like jinx isn't a good idea. she's not in a good way."

"i didn't walk out on her, auntie."

she huffs, placing her pen down on the stack before her. she's got an eyebrow raised in that way she does so often, but there's still a softness to her gaze. you're family. while she's not particularly happy with you right now, especially since she's the one who has to take care of jinx in your absence, she's still forgiving.

"i don't have a clue where she could be right now, kid. but she'll be back at that hideout of hers soon enough. i'd just wait."

it's not the answer you'd like to hear; you've got a one-track mind focused solely on jinx right now. but it'll suffice. she's right, she always does eventually return there.

"...thanks, auntie sev."

"yeah, yeah. i've got work to do. go be with your girlfriend."

she concedes, making a 'shoo' motion with her prosthetic hand.

✧.*

you jump to your feet off of the torn plush couch the moment jinx steps into view in her hideout.

"jinx."

her head nearly snaps in your direction, and she runs over to you with alarming speed. she's always been a swift girl, but you don't know if you've ever seen her this urgent.

"baby? is that you?"

she breathes out, standing directly in front of you. wide magenta eyes look into yours, and you nearly begin crying on the spot. your arms throw around the girl's slender frame before you can think. you hold her tight to you, as if you're afraid that she'll disappear if you let go. usually it's her holding you like this, shaking like a leaf and struggling to keep it together, but there's a first for everything.

"yes, yes, it's me. i'm here."

"what happened? i... thought you left." her voice cracks on the last word, afraid and insecure.

"i would never. trust me. a lot happened, i'll explain later, just..."

there's a pause for a moment as you pull back slightly, before closing the distance to press your lips to jinx's. your lips move together in a slow, gentle, desperate rhythm, and you try to put all of your current feelings into them.

i missed you.

i'm sorry.

i'm never leaving.

i love you.

you slowly pull back, your eyes welling with tears threatening to spill at any moment.

"i didn't mean for any of this to happen, i promise you. i never meant to leave you, i told you i'd be back in a few hours and i wasn't." you whisper, a tear spilling and slipping down your cheek. your arms tighten around jinx, and you can tell from the way her breathing is growing labored. she's not upset, just so damn overwhelmed. "i love you, jinx, so much."

another chaste kiss to her lips to emphasize your words.

"are you okay?"

"i... yeah. i'm okay. i just didn't know if you were coming back." she trails off, voice raspy and weak. those words hit you like a punch to the gut, no matter the fact that you'd seen them coming. you hate seeing jinx so torn up, and you hate being the cause of that.

"i'll always come back, babe." you whisper, holding jinx's gaze. you slowly move your hands to rest atop her shoulders. "let's go do something."

"do what?"

"i don't know. anything," you say, your eyes hopeful. "i just need to be with you. i'll tell you everything, and we can do whatever you want. i just missed you."

jinx purses her lips for a moment, a little 'hmm' coming from her as she thinks over the possibilities. she thinks of things in her hideout, but she senses that you want to go out into the city right now. there's a lot of shops, but she's never been one to frequent them. an abandoned warehouse with fireworks.

"i know a place,"

she declares, taking your dominant hand from her shoulder and holding it in hers.

"shall we?"

✧.* bonus!

"oh, screw you!" powder giggles, flour dusting her cheeks.

"i didn't mean to!"

the alternative you is back in her body. she's got no memory of what happened the past two days, all she remembers is waking up in powder's arms to the sight of tears running down pale cheeks. you hadn't sustained any injuries, no scarring, but you were just... gone. you couldn't recount anything.

"it said put the flour in the mixing bowl, not on my face, you goof!"

you're together in your cramped kitchen trying to figure out a recipe, one of vander's that he'd written down for powder. strawberry shortcake, one of her childhood favorites that vander claims she used to beg him for. she vehemently denies this, and you go along with her whims, but you can't help inwardly laughing at the thought of a little powder begging her dad to bake for her.

"it was a mistake, pow! i swear!"

she rolls her eyes, but the hysterical giggles coming from her girlfriend tell you that she's not really angry. she shakes her head, taking the paper in her hands again to reread the instructions. she plucks a wooden spoon from one of your drawers, keeping her eyes focused on the paper.

"so it says to mix the dry ingredients, then we get started on wet."

"yeah, that's usually how it works when you bake things."

powder grunts, and a light smack lands on your shoulder, prompting another fit of laughter from you.

"my bad for not having experience with this! you said you were gonna make it, so we're making it."

you snort in response, gently taking the recipe from her hands and looking over it yourself. you set down the paper on the counter as she begins mixing the dry ingredients in the bowl- a pink and blue clay one that she'd made especially for you. it wasn't the ideal size for most of your baking endeavors, but you'd never tell your dear girlfriend that. it was perfect, because it was hers.

"i'm happy to make whatever you want, babe. just say the word." you hum, planting a gentle kiss on her cheek before striding to your fridge to retrieve a few wet ingredients.

"anything? anything, anything?"

she asks, looking back at you. her hand is still working.

"anything you want."

"i've heard macarons are really hard. would you make those for me?"

you chuckle lightly, placing a carton of eggs, milk, and strawberries on the counter.

"they wouldn't be pretty, i'm sure. but i'd make them for you."

powder lets out a happy squeal, before turning to you and stepping aside to show you her work.

"i think i'm done mixing." she smiles. "i didn't mess it up, did i?"

you shake your head lightly, a playful lilt to your tone whilst searching your overhead cupboards for a second bowl.

"you did great. it's just dry ingredients, not hard to mix those. the wet ingredients can get a bit tricky, though."

powder rolls her eyes and groans, prompting a laugh from you.

"it's not that bad. come on, let's get started on that. as soon as we're done, you'll have that strawberry shortcake."

[androdetective]

I wish people talked about the recruiters backstory more. His story is one of exploitation and class tensions. He came from poverty and was a young guy who became a pink guard. Who eventually caught Oh Il-nam's interest, which is what got him promoted from soldier to manager to recruiter. He was only able to become successful because a rich guy happened to notice him. That was all entirely based on luck. We know he's rich now from that recruiter morning routine video that was released. He's one of the very rare people who actually went from poverty to riches.

When he was at his lowest when young, he was swept up by bad people who gave him the worst mentalities. But that's what caused him to be able to live a comfortable life. The way he talks, he talks exactly the way Oh Il-nam (and even the front man) talk about the games. How he's just a messenger who delivers messages, how he told himself during his guard years that the poor people are trash with no purpose. It's the simplification of horrible things. The mindset of the games/system got a hold of him. His poverty roots are irrelevant to him. He probably thinks he was different and a hard worker, which is why he made it unlike the other trash.

When he gives that "you're just another piece of trash who made it out of the garbage" speech to Gi-hun and how he only made it because of luck, that entirely applies to him. He had a millionaire VIP to help him, compared to the other hundreds of regular guards. It's unbelievable luck to have a millionaire to help you up the ranks/class. He is a self-hating class traitor. He's those types of people who went from poverty to upper class. And because they managed that, they swear that the system works and will be horribly classist to people below them. They think that lower class people are garbage and need to work harder just like they did. Ignoring the fact that they only managed to because of luck.

We know that outside of his work, he messes with poor people through games/social experiments. When he gave the homeless people the choices between bread and a lottery ticket, everyone but one chose the tickets. Which is already cruel, considering it takes extreme luck to win. It's even worse than a 1/456 chance. When he's finished, he dumps the bread and stomps on them. He then blames all the homeless people for wasting the bread because they chose unlucky tickets. This isn't even a part of his job, but he does this to reaffirm his belief in the system/game. It's a special type of cruelness because the money he spent on the tickets and bread was nothing to him. He could've given each person both of each and continued to be rich. But he doesn't because he views them as wastes who don't deserve it.

When holding Kim and Choi Woo-seok hostage. He ties them up and bounds them with dog bone gags. Something he probably got from the love hotel on such short notice. There are countless jokes about the gags, but I do think they have meaning. The recruiter is called a dog by Gi-hun. Something that means he's below his masters. He did not like getting told that by Gi-hun. We know the recruiter likes putting others below him. The show choice of specifically dog bones, to me, is another instance of him transferring that powerlessness to those below him. To have a sense of power and control. A reminder that he's made it. He even plays a classical song during the game (and even during russian roulette). With the song named "Time to Say Goodbye", it's one last mocking. Classical songs are seen as very high class. It's the kind of music played in the games. And that's what the recruiter enjoys and strives for.

We know that during his pink soldier days, he ended up shooting his dad. There are two beliefs people come to about him. That he was either a regular dad or a bad one. If he was a regular one, it shows that the trauma of poverty and capitalism can make you turn against loved ones. If he wasn't, it shows that already vulnerable people with no support are more likely to get preyed on by the privileged. The recruiter ends up saying a line I found interesting, "One day, they gave me a gun. I liked the way it felt. It was like someone had finally acknowledged my existence. " This was the most vulnerable we've seen him. This implies he didn't feel he had support until he was given power. A bad kind of power given to him by Oh Il-nam. He was being set up to become a valuable asset, not a person. That line could imply he didn't feel acknowledged not only by nobody before the games, but by even his family. If that's true, then that could further explain his happy attitude when he talked about shooting his dad. If he already sucked, then he was even worse by being desperate enough to play the games. Even all that aside, his feelings about his dad didn't matter. He had a job to do. If he couldn't do his job, he could get killed. It's either his dad dies or he dies. And that's exactly how the system works. He knows it's a dog eat dog world.

He becomes such a strong believer in the system he is willing to die for it. He followed the rules of Russian roulette because if he didn't, he'd go against of the rules of the system he wholeheartedly believes in. The system who got him to greatness. The system wants you to kill and die to uphold it, so that's why he does it.

Before he shoots himself, half his face is confident while the other half is scared. Gong Yoo has said he did that on purpose. Even before death, he was putting on a confident performance. But his fear, from seeing that HIS luck with the system ran out, was enough to crack through. From what we've seen of him, he's almost never genuine. He puts on a customer like service kindness. When we know he hates the people he recruits/interacts with. The most genuine we've seen him was during rock paper scissors and russian roulette. And even then, he's putting on a show trying to freak out the players. He looks down on them, and he wants to be the one in control. He's not allowed to be genuine with those he recruits, nor does he let himself. He's a good employee who does his best for his employers. And that's exactly it, he's another employee who's easily replaceable. After the recruiters' death, we don't see In-ho worry about it. No one cares because there's others like him. As Gi-hun has said, he runs around, barks, and grovels like a dog for his master. The recruiter is no one special, no matter how much he sucks up to those in power. It shows best in his lack of a name. His personhood doesn't matter, what matters is his job.

[elbiotipo]

I'm trying to develop my worldbuilding but have run into a problem. I don't want to do what usual fantasy settings do where specific "races" have very specific personality and cultural traits, so I'm trying to make a setting with different anthropomorphic "races" coexisting to different extents. The problem is, anytime I question myself on how somehow could've happened or how the different species ended up in their current sociopolitical climate, I don't know when to stop. If it were for me, I'd go as far back as the discovery of fire. How do you know when to stop?

Ideally you never stop, but I understand that sometimes you want to get on with a story. And that's another thing about worldbuilding, once you start creating a world different from Earth, you start asking yourself... well, why this world had the same evolution as Earth, wouldn't different geography result in different species? And then you go into speculative biology and speculative evolution and that's a rabbit hole you will never get out of. And more, you can say, why should this world have the same day length, year length, axial tilt, size as Earth... and THAT'S when you do worldbuilding for real, the worldbuilding never ends.

But here's a tip to make it easier. If you don't know something, if you don't know how to stop, you can always draw from real-life Earth. For example, let's say that you don't want to do the entire evolution of life. You have a cheat sheet; you can use the Biogeographic Realms, and mix and match fauna and flora, and you can assume evolution took a relatively Earth-like turn since your world's continents formed. You have all the life you would expect from regular Earth, and you add your own twists as needed.

For example, in one project, I wanted a Southern hemisphere vibe, so I created a world where the flora and fauna are Neotropical (South American) and Australasian, with some extinct creatures from those places, which is totally justifiable because many species can stay alive for a long time even extinct elsewhere. I just assumed that evolution followed roughly the same path there, which for a fantasy world with actual gods is more than fine.

If you are stuck in certain places on how to create your civilizations, you have literally all of human history and culture to draw from. If you don't know how civilizations in jungles develop, for example, it's time to learn about the Maya and wider Mesoamerica, Srivijaya and Majapahit, the kingdoms of Western Africa like Dahomey, Benin, Oyo, the cultures of the Amazon... Every place in this planet is full of vibrant history, culture and solutions to problems that make for great worldbuilding. You have to be careful about taking inspirations from real life cultures, but it's better that you learn about them rather than not doing research at all!

This is why I insist that people learn about real-life geography and history. Not because CINEMASINS DING, but because once you do, worldbuilding becomes easy and fun. Once you learn the rules about how the real world works, you can twist them and break them as you wish.

[neege]

Wolfstar + awkward family dinner

Here you go!!! This is a little longer than I expected because I am bad at keeping things short and sweet, but I hope you enjoy! I decided to make this a little silly ❤️

It's so quiet.

The sounds of forks and knifes moving across their plates is almost delicate, as if everyone's afraid to make even the slightest noise.

Dinner had started with some very brave attempts from Hope to make conversation, but now even she was struggling under the oppressive blanket of discomfort that seemed to be covering the room.

Remus doesn't know what's going on.

His parents have always been fine with his sexuality, and they'd seemed genuinely excited to hear about him and Sirius. It had been their idea for them to visit—and Remus had planned everything out: the only available time for them to come fell on their anniversary, so he arranged for them to stay in a lovely bed and breakfast up the road, before spending the next few days in huddled together in Remus's childhood bedroom.

Things had been great when they arrived this morning—his parents greeted Sirius with noticeable warmth, but sometime between taking a walk and Remus waking up from his nap for dinner, things had turned horribly stiff.

He just wish he knew why.

Sirius, bless him, clears his throat and turns to address his mum.

"So, Remus has been telling me about your interest in travel?"

Grateful for anything other than the suffocating silence, Hope offers a small smile, "Yes! Lyall and I have thought about renting a van and maybe venturing up along the coast."

"Oh!" Desperate to keep the conversation going, Remus jumps in, "Sirius has always wanted to do something like that! Although instead of a van I think he'd love to get me on the back of his motorcycle-"

He's interpreted by the sound of his father choking aggressively on his wine—nearly spiting it out over the table—and Remus finds himself bubbling up with frustration.

"Okay, what the hell happened while I was asleep!"

All three of them look at him in surprise.

"I thought you both liked Sirius! What could've possibly happened to make you change your mind in the past 4 hours-"

He's interrupted once again, this time by the sound of his boyfriend's laughter, which only irritates him further.

"Darling, it's okay! It's nothing like that-"

"Then what! What happened!" Remus sounds a little bit whinier than he'd like to, and calms slightly at the touch of Sirius's hand.

A definite hush falls back over the dinner table, as if no one wants to actually answer him. He can see his dad's face turn redder and redder, while his mum is visibly fighting back a grimace.

Sirius sighs, pink-cheeked and biting his lip like he doesn't want to talk anymore. He steels himself before continuing on.

"It seems... Well, it appears that..."

He stops, takes a breath, and starts again.

"Remus darling, did you get me a present for our anniversary?"

"Yes?" He tilts his head in confusion, thinking about the soft leather gloves tucked into the pocket of Sirius's weekend bag.

"Not the gloves love, the other thing..."

Remus thinks about it for a moment, perplexed. The gloves were the only thing he'd exchanged with Sirius yesterday at dinner. In return, Sirius had given him a lovely leather bound notebook with his name embossed on the inside cover.

He's not quite sure what Sirius is talking about for a second, and then, all at once the blood instantly drains out of Remus's body.

He recalls the small red box he'd slipped into Sirius's leather jacket pocket back at the bed and breakfast, too embarrassed to watch his boyfriend open it at dinner. Sirius hadn't mentioned anything about it yet, so Remus had assumed it wasn't found yet.

Sirius, noticing his reaction, continues to speak horrible horrible words.

"Well, the box must have fallen out from wherever you placed it, because while you were asleep, your dad found some pictures scattered across the floor and-"

The fork from his hand falls loudly to the plate below as Remus covers his eyes with his hands in horror. All the blood previously vacating Remus's body comes flooding back in to his face in the world's most violent blush.

No. No!

He thinks about how embarrassing it felt to set all that up. How he felt stiff at first, but more confident as he kept snapping photos. How he had angled the camera just right to capture Sirius's bike while still blocking out the mess from the garage. How he nearly chickened out after looking at the final product: ten separate muggle polaroids depicting Remus, sexily draped over Sirius's motorcycle—some where he's wearing only his boyfriend's leather jacket, and others where he's wearing nothing at all.

No!

Sirius's cut-off laugh cuts through his momentary panic enough for him to take note of how his dad is decidedly not looking at him.

His mum starts to speak, a small hint of amusement in her voice, "Honey it's okay, it was just a little surprising is all! We know that you two are both adults, and-"

"No!" Remus finds his voice—the heat of his cheeks burn. "No, please stop!"

Sirius is now outright giggling, the bastard.

"Oh my God!!" Remus continues with his mortification, "Please tell me you didn't see what they were?!"

Sirius settles down, and it's quiet for another moment.

His dad clears his throat awkwardly, and then:

"So Sirius... how have you been enjoying that motorcycle?"

"DAD!"

Sirius dissolves into loud, happy laughter.

[peteytheparrot]

i hope this makes you feel better but yeah you're right! vassago wasn't designed for helluva boss. if you go back to the hazbin pilot or just the preview with vaggie talking about the overlords, you can see him roughly in the middle. with a completely unchanged design btw.

and it's honestly upsetting to me, because i wish he had been an overlord if they just really didn't want to redesign him to be more pirate like. (even though the pirate idea does work with vassagos ability to reveal secrets! like x marks the spot for buried treasure! but who would know that at all if the poster of him released before mastermind didn't exist?) he could've been a client for I.M.P. since he used to be human even if it was maybe years or decades ago since he died, or maybe he could've been verosikas manager to highlight the power sinners and those rubbing elbows with royalty have over imps of all kinds. or both!

vassago isn't even a bad guy who does anything wrong; i just hate him on the principal of the time he wasted (and tbh, the money wasted for his VA too when the women have noticably gotten as little lines as possible to manage the limited budget this indie series has,) and how contridictory his existence is to the narrative of no one in the goetia liking stolas when bro is literally hyping him up to sing and is THE ONLY ONE willing to defend stolas but also won't text him to go, "hey bestie this trial is smearing ur name! do something abt it bbgurl" like it's so obvious he's just there for more gay melodrama with big broadway names behind it. that fucking Bird that i Hate

TRUE I like Vassago as an idea but he’s completly and utterly useless to the plot of the show, we also know jack shit about him like why he even gives a shit about Stolas in the first place. Like go away, you’re just making the story more of a mess than it already is pLEASE-

AND OMG HE WAS ORIGINALLY FROM HH??? THEN WHY?? SAY HES A PIRATE IF HES CLEARLY DESIGNED TO NOT BE ONE 😭😭 JUST SAY HES A POP STAR OR SOMETHING IM BEGGING YOU 😭😭😭

Anyway completely agree with everything you’re saying I’m eating it up

(For you people that need more context here’s the original post)

[allthingsfangirl101]

Familiar Faces Part 2 – Jake Seresin

Part 1

Even though I wasn't training Jake and his team, the Admirals kept me on as their efficiency expert. Their big mission was two weeks away, and the trainees were getting more anxious.

After Maverick decided who would fly with him, I worried about Jake. But he seemed okay with it. He's still been training with everyone, but he claimed there wasn't as much pressure.

Plus, we started going out and got into a routine. After training, we'd pick up dinner and go back to my place. He'd end up staying so late that I didn't want him driving back to his apartment so he'd stay over. We'd fall asleep holding each other and wake up the same way. It was perfect and everything I wanted when we first met.

Until. . .

It's been a while since I had a nightmare I couldn't pull myself out of. Jake didn't know about my nightmares and ever since we started going out, I've been too embarrassed to tell him. All the nights he's slept over, I've barely slept in fear of him finding out.

Tonight, I couldn't stop it.

I woke up to someone shaking me and calling out my name. I gasped awake, a sob getting stuck in my throat. I looked around the room, my eyes taking a second to adjust to the lack of light in the room.

"Y/N?" Jake's soft voice whispered.

"Jake?" I had to double-check.

"Yeah," he said with a soft smile on his face. He reached over and cupped my face in his hand. "It's me, baby."

His eyes softened when he saw the tears in my eyes. I heard him sigh as he wrapped his arms around me, pulled me into his chest, and laid us down.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked once we were comfortable.

"It's nothing," I lied.

"Come on, Y/N," he sighed. "It took me almost ten minutes to wake you up. It was not nothing. Please, talk to me."

"It was about my mission," I whispered, my voice breaking. Jake didn't respond. Instead, he tightened his arms around me.

"Replay or worse version?"

"Kinda replay," I shrugged, "with a bit of pausing and replaying."

"Okay, you lost me," he said with a soft chuckle. I smiled a little but couldn't make myself laugh.

"In my dream, I kept trying to turn my plane away from the training facility," I said, my voice breaking at the end. "Every time I did, I was suddenly facing it again. Nothing I did worked."

As the tears burned my eyes, I tucked deeper into his side, burying my face in his shoulder. He reached up and started running his fingers through my hair.

"I'm sorry the Navy made you do that," he whispered. "I wish there was something I could've done."

"I wish you were with me," I mumbled.

"Me too," he sighed.

"There was something else," I said slowly.

"In your dream?" He asked, looking down at me. "What is it?"

"I dreamt about you."

"Y/N. . ."

"I dreamt about your upcoming mission," I continued, my voice breaking. "I dreamt that you guys went off and. . . it took a horrible turn and. . . You didn't come home to me. And I watched it from base, not able to do anything as you were shot down."

By the end of it, I broke into a sob. I curled more into him as I sobbed, "I can't lose you, Jake."

"You won't, Y/N," he said gently. "I promise. You are not going to lose me. Besides, I'm just the extra."

I know he was trying to make me feel better, but it didn't work. "If they need you, you have to go, Jake. No arguing. If they tell you to go, you go. You don't have a choice. Just because you're the spare doesn't mean you won't ever leave the ship. And when they send you, I can't stop them. I have to sit back and watch you go. I have to listen as you fly off. I have to sit back and I can't help you if you get into trouble. I have to just listen and watch that damn bubble as I lose you."

"Firefly," he cut me off using my callsign. He sat up, pulling me with him. He grabbed my hands and turned me toward him. "Truth is, we don't know what's going to happen in three days. We don't know if they're going to need me. The only thing that matters is that I know what I'm doing and I will do everything I can to make sure everyone on my team gets home."

"Including you?"

Jake smiled softly as he grabbed my face and pressed his lips to mine. The kiss was soft and slow. When he broke the kiss, he leaned his forehead against mine.

"Including me."

* * * * *

I walked into base, my exhaustion from last night weighing me down. After my nightmare, we stayed up talking. I tried to get Jake to go to bed, but he was more focused on me.

"You okay, Y/L/N?" Captain Phillips asked as I walked into our shared office.

"I'm fine," I shrugged off. He gently grabbed my arm, stopping me from going to my desk.

"What's wrong, Y/N?"

"I just. . . I didn't sleep that well," I said slowly. As soon as I said it, the look in his eyes fell.

"Nightmares?"

"Yes," I said softly as I pulled my arm out of his grasp and walked over to my desk. I sat down as he followed me.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Maverick asked gently.

"Jake talked me through it." My heart jumped into my throat when I realized what I said. "He talked me through it because. . . I had called him and. . ."

"It's okay," Maverick chuckled. "I know that you and Hangman are dating."

"Wait, you know?"

"I do," he smiled at me. "Hangman came to see me after you two first got together. He was worried that your being together would get you fired. He wanted to discuss it with me and ensure it was okay."

"I can't believe he told you," I said under my breath.

"He's crazy about you," Maverick said in a soft, fatherly tone. "Ever since you joined us, he's been different. He's been more focused, more driven, and less competitive. He's trying to prove himself without showboating. He's trying to be a better pilot, a better man, for you."

I looked down in hopes of hiding my blush. Maverick started to walk out of the office and stopped to pat me on the shoulder and whisper, "You've changed him, Y/N. In a good way."

I kept thinking about Maverick and my conversation throughout the rest of the day. As Maverick did some final training, I busied myself with running final checks on the planes and their systems.

Three days later, the team was to fly their mission. I walked through the ship, unable to calm myself. I figured that remaining in motion would help me not think about the possible risk.

I was passing the bunks when I was suddenly pulled into one of the rooms. I had just enough time to see that it was Jake before he pulled me close and pressed his lips to mine. As I slowly kissed him back, my heart sank into my stomach as I realized there was a chance that this would be our last kiss.

"What are you doing?" I gasped when he broke the kiss. "You're supposed to be getting your plane ready."

"I know," he smirked as he pulled me closer. "I just wanted to see my girl in case. . ."

"Don't," I cut him off and pulled away from him. I replaced his arms with mine. "I can't think about that, Jake. I can't think about the possibility of losing you."

"Baby," he said, dropping his voice to a whisper as he pulled me back. "I promise you that I will be careful."

"I know you will," I whispered back to him. I looked up at him, unable to stop myself. "I just can't lose you, Jake. I. . . I love you."

"I love you too, Y/N," he smiled. He slowly leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. I threw my arms around him and started kissing him back. I forced ourselves to break the kiss before we could get too into it.

"Because you love me, I need you to be smart. I know you will do everything you can to help your team but. . ."

"I will do whatever it takes to come home to you, Y/N," he gently cut me off. He smiled as he added, "I love you, Firefly."

"I love you too, Serendipity."

* * * * *

As I sat in the control room, anxiously bouncing my knee. It felt like it didn't take long for things to go wrong.

"Dagger Two defending," Rooster said. "Shit, I'm out of flares!"

"Rooster, evade, evade!" Maverick yelled.

"I can't shake 'em! They're on me! They're on me!"

Maverick moved to be above Rooster and set off his flares, blocking Rooster from the SAMs. When he was hit, the room went silent.

"Mav! No!"

"Dagger One is hit!" Phoenix yelled. "I repeat, Dagger One is hit. Maverick is down."

"Dagger One, status," Rooster tried to request. "Status! Dagger One, come in!"

"I didn't see a parachute," Payback said.

"We have to circle back," Rooster demanded.

"Comanche. Bandits inbound. Single group, hot. Recommend Dagger flow south. One minute to intercept."

"Get em' back to the carrier now," Admiral Simpson instructed.

"All Daggers flow to ECP. You have bandits headed for you."

"What about Maverick?" Rooster asked.

"Tell him there's nothing he can do for Maverick, not in a damn F-18," Admiral Simpson commanded.

"Dagger Spare request permission to launch and fly air cover."

My heart jumped into my throat as I heard Jake's request. I held my breath, waiting for their approval. I looked and watched as Admiral Simpson shook his head.

"Negative, Spare."

I could practically see Jake angrily grumbling in his plane. Today was a reminder of why working for the Navy was so painful.

"Launch search and rescue," Admiral Bates commanded.

"Negative," Admiral Simpson said quickly. "Not with bandits in the air."

"But, sir, Maverick is still out there," Hondo said.

"We are not losing anyone else today," Admiral Simpson snapped. "Get them home, now."

"Dagger, you are not to engage. Repeat, do not engage. Dagger Two, return to carrier. Acknowledge."

They were greeted with nothing but silence.

"Acknowledge," they tried again.

"Rooster, those bandits are closing," Phoenix sighed. "We can't go back."

"Rooster, he's gone," Bob said quietly. "Maverick's gone."

* * * * *

We had no idea what happened next. Until. . .

"Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen."

"No," I mumbled. I turned toward Hondo with my heart in my throat. He reached over and gently grabbed my hand.

"Son of a bitch," we heard Rooster laugh.

"This is your savior speaking," Hangman continued. I knew he was joking but every word made my heart sink. "Please fasten your seat belts, return your tray tables to their locked and upright positions, and prepare for landing."

"Hey, Hangman," Rooster smirked, "you look good."

"I am good, Rooster," Hangman said instantly. "I'm very good. I'll see you back on deck."

"Damn it, Jake," I whispered under my breath. Unable to control my anger or calm my nerves, I left the control room.

I nervously paced as I waited for their planes to return. I watched as each one of the pilots came back.

The second I saw Jake's plane land, I felt like my heart was finally out of my throat. Tears burned my eyes as I saw him climbing out of his plane. My legs felt numb as I walked out to the tarmac. The second he jumped down from his plane, I saw Jake's eyes search for me.

When his eyes fell on mine, he smiled but I couldn't bring myself to return it. With his helmet in his hand, he walked over to me.

"I should be angry with you," I said, my voice breaking as tears started streaming down my face, "but I'm just relieved you're back."

Jake laughed as I jumped and wrapped my arms around his neck. We could hear everyone rushing to help Maverick and Rooster but all I could focus on was Jake in my arms.

"I'm sorry, love," he whispered subconsciously tightening his arms around me. "But when we thought we lost them both. . . I had to see for myself. I couldn't sit in my plane on the ship and do nothing."

"I know," I whispered as I started running my fingers through his hair. I smirked before adding, "Whatever happened to leaving your wingman out to dry?"

"What can I say?" He laughed as he broke the hug and looked down at me. "Love has the ability to change even the douchiest of douchebags."

I pouted as I tucked back into Jake's arms. "You're not a douche," I mumbled. "You were never like that with me."

[sunlessea]

he supposes it doesn't think him the type for such serious reminiscing. how it would have gawked in awe, had it ever met him in his days as a helsing pup proper - such a noble heir he'd once been, with his head held high on his shoulder, presenting himself above everyone around him, most of all masters like itself. he's thankful it hadn't, though. he's not sure he ever could've looked at it with such kindness as he does now, in his time as cassius ashburnum. it never would have trusted him again, had it been irons he had fought that day he burned the bazaar down, rather than mr fires. now, he can rest his hands at either side of its neck and it does not seem to even consider the possibly that he would wrap them around its neck.

the thought had been there, when they'd first begun interacting. it had assumed this a ploy of some sort, to hunt it, surely. in this position, he could kill it, if he tried. catch it by some manner of surprise, and finish a job long forgotten. it trusts him, he notes, as he gently strokes his thumb along its jawline. its ears are flat 'gainst its head, claws gentle alone his sides ... as much as they can be, from a beast not accustomed to playing so nice.

"i believe that you trust me, and i don't think you could trust me if you didn't love me. but i also believe that if someone is incapable of telling another person their feelings out loud ... then they don't love them enough." his answer is honest, where he has not always been. his hands lower from its shoulders again to gently tug at some of the fabric its bundled in, layer upon layer of cloaks. they were already falling off as it had been, but now he parts some of them further. it is only enough, in the end, to expose some small section of its chest - enough that he may slip his hand underneath and sprawl his palm open over the lacking beat of its heart. there's no gentle thrum inside of it, like his own, no candle lit for mr irons to feign its humanity.

he wonders, yet doesn't ask. maybe it's never had very much reason to wish for human things : a heartbeat, air, passion, pleasure, love, tears, raw emotion. just like him, in an age long past. but he desires now, more than anything. enough for both of them, how his heart races, his cheeks flush, his eyes water.

but maybe it isn't so far off.

"how fondly? in what ways do you think of me? fondly enough that you want to kiss me, but not so that you will tell me that you love me. you don't know your own heart, do you? you didn't even know you had one." he is patient, even when he isn't. his own ears flatten, his expression both lonesome and yearning in his understanding. he would wait forever ... but watching the pieces slowly fall into place makes his heart ache. he wants it to love him so badly. he wants it to want him, too. "you say carnality, i just call it romance. i'm used to being misunderstood, but i want you to understand me. as a poet of veilgarden, i've turned down countless men and women in this city who sought carnal pleasure. i can't let someone touch me who doesn't love me. i just can't. my heart is my body and if anyone ever took advantage of my heart, i would kill myself."

his dramatics do not end with everyday banter or vivacious teases - but even through flowery self deprecation, he is so very serious. its hands on his hips stabilize him, however, giving him something to focus on so he doesn't lose himself in romantic reverie. by time he is done with its cloaks, the last bits of them only cling to irons' arms, and that is not something he can push off on his own. so he stares down at it, fingers tracing lines of its muscles once more. his expression is far away, distant, but not sad. he's lost in thought, paying mind to every spot that makes it shudder when his fingers move over them. it's more sensitive than he'd thought.

it grabs his attention again when it speaks, and he looks up at it with wide, doe - like eyes, curious and contemplative. before it even clarifies the heavy burden it offers him, he's taken by it, his tail swaying gently behind him with expectation. the more secure it squeezes his hips as it lifts itself to sit with him on its lap, the faster his tail starts to wag, ears at last perking up once more. for how seriously he'd worn his melancholy, his expression melts easily into tender reverence, smile 'pon his lips with narrowed eyes as their noses touch. he shifts with it, raising his arms up to wrap 'round its shoulders and pull it in closer so they can sit comfortably face - to - face. "you are not a burden, mr irons. your heart is a gift."

maybe he should've expected it to kiss him, how it had been shifting to close the space 'tween them again ... but he is still a little surprised, all the same. the second time it less brutal than the first, and as a result, less awkward - the harsh press of its lips 'gainst his own is much less feral, though still quite rough. it's charming, in a way. he thinks this is its attempt at kindness, and he does not tease it for that. he falls into line, pulling it down harder by its shoulders and letting it part his lips against its once more, 'til its tongue finds his own. he's able to shift in its lap until his legs comfortably rest at its sides, knees pressing into its thighs as his fingers tangle through its hair. its need is met by his own passion, a loving romantic at his core, even in the depths of spiraling desire, albeit of a purer context than his admissions of fantasy would suggest.

humanity is hardly so simple for those born inhuman. to neatly box the wild and often inconsistent flux of its feelings into something kine could comprehend, to balance learned nature with its basal instinct—its love resulting comes intertwined with a certain hunger. and that is difficult to explain, more than just a comfortable warmth against its chest, more than excitement, or an ache in its stomach, it is, above all else, an intense and indomitable craving. it feels it 'cross every inch of its body, inside and out, with every kiss he steals and how earnestly he wraps himself around it.

the way he touches it drives it absolutely mad, in a way it is not wholly certain that it actually minds : it is naught like anything it, personally, had it proffer a more accurate definition, fantasized, and it thinks it might then be the surprise of it that leaves it feeling so willfully captured. his fingers tracing 'gainst subtle ripples of muscle and skin follow a trail so delightfully sensitive in ways it could never have expected, untouched as it had been in its self-imposed isolation. it likes the warmth it feels 'neath his palms, against his body, his breath against its lips the few moments their lips part and how it feels his breathing quiver with each slow, arduous draw of its tongue over the wound begged-open 'neath its teeth; it likes how he always beckons it closer with his blood still on its tongue, deepening their kiss with venture of his own will. it likes how its body cannot decide, in continued conflict of its own heart, if it should purr or growl, and how often it alternates 'tween both muffled by his lips.

not to say that it is without surprise when his body shifts. though it is, perhaps, more muted a shock than t'would otherwise be, were he any other. and it may as well be purely for the lack of force, rather than strength—it feels when his leg hooks even tighter 'cross its back, the subtle pressure of his heel pressing into its side, but this too feels more like he is simply beckoning it follow his lead. and that is the bigger surprise, how simply it relents.

this, yes, has it growl. but that is merely natural response for any predator proper pushed to such a vulnerable point. even fully clothed, having rolled gently 'pon its back with his encouragement, it feels so exposed laying beneath him! it mourns the taste of him, same as the pressure of his lips, but it is stalled in its own personal languishing by how sternly he seems look back at it—it can't recall a moment he's ever been so, even when they'd first met. and that, more than anything, piques its interest and begs its attention.

better would it be the sort of blushing maiden with heat rushing to flood her cheeks at such a thought, than how stone-faced it is in their reality. there is no pretty poetry to weave how it stares up at him, wide-eyed and ears slowly pressing 'gainst its head for cause of ... not embarrassment, quite, but something like— it has heard far cruder things, years passed before they ever crossed paths, but it thinks it is his clarification most that his its chest constrict, fang pulling the soft flesh of its cheek 'neath to chew as it tries to pretend it is not quite so affected as it most certainly is. it is not shy, but it is not ... this particularly brazen, either. he definitely is special.

" do you believe i love you? " its voice feels particularly hoarse, even to it : and it presumes it is only cause for how often it was stolen in their heated exchange, every gasp or moan or plea stifled by each their eager tongues. but even so, its tone is cautious; careful, where what little inflection it is able to offer cannot otherwise be misconstrued for rejection. its chest aches too, feeling how his hands continue making their way 'cross its skin, the bulk of its body, but that nagging pull has grown increasingly familiar in the passing weeks. it considers itself lucky merely only shuddering when his fingers brush over dips along its body that are more sensitive than most. the tension ebbs and flows, but its fixation 'pon him is unwavering.

it thinks its gaze shakes while he speaks, rapt, a subtle quiver align with the occasional shiver that runs its way through its body. it's a far different tone than how he has ever approached it—and yet, it is somehow just the same. desire spoken from the heart, a romantic at his core, no matter how salacious the tale he could weave, he hardly need speak of the love he feels for it for it to comprehend. it hurts when it swallows, 'round the growing lump in its throat.

" it ... is true, the subjects of which my thoughts have drifted to. i have thought about what it might have been like to kiss you more than i am open to admit. though i do— ... did not understand the process. i desired to. i do think of you fondly. in numerous ways, and that is strange to me. " like would he be to forgive it, its quiet voice; barely above murmur, that, as it gradually takes to unraveling its hold 'round his waist, slowly pulling its hands down over his hips as it speaks, " i would never think less of you for carnality. i think you are naive, at your best, but physicality or need for is hardly my concern. i do not understand you, or what you have done to me. of that, i feel as if i no longer know myself. "

his hair tickles its cheek, its jaw; shrouds them where what few parts of its cloaks still cling to it offer little protection from the intensity of his gaze. " it is a heavy burden to ask of you, elysium, but ... " it starts, but pauses soon after; its hands have settled neatly over his hips, and though it does squeeze them long enough to beckon even more of his attention, it uses its tight grip as means to steady itself as it lifts itself up to brush its nose up 'gainst his own. once more, merely a breath apart—and it really does savor the feeling, nearly more than the blood it still knows clings to his lips. and its too, though it's quick to swipe that away as it pulls itself closer to him. hands travelling slow from hip to side, pressing down gently 'long the slight curve of his waist. " —perhaps you might be willing to bring clarity to my own heart? " it has not suddenly become anymore confident in the gesture as it had started. but it is difficult to be too clumsy, this close. no sooner has it finished speaking before it closes the distance; and once more, it pushes its lips hard against his own. not in curiosity, or even impulse : it needs him.

[seyaryminamoto]

Fic-to-Art #29: Azula's belated birthday present for Sokka

No other poll in my Patreon has ever been as competitive and chaotic as this one was, haha. I seriously didn't know who would win since two prompts were neck to neck until the very last moment. But this one took it home in the end...! And here's our piece for this month, right before the month ends :'D

This always was one of my favorite chapters from Part 1, and that scene never failed to make me feel the feels. I loved remembering the early days of how these two were constantly finding any and every excuse to disregard their positions in society and just act on their feelings... oh, what happy times, no matter if we were constantly on edge because they HAD to give in already ffs XD

The BG was tricky but I hope it worked out alright, though figuring out how to make the texture for the rocky crater was pure torture. But playing with the colors here was really really fun, and I found a great brush for the pattern of Azula's dress, which made my life waaaaaaay easier, haha. Anyway, I really hope you guys liked it! Definitely my better rendition of this scene so far!

If you would like to be part of the creative process behind these pieces, a $1 pledge on Patreon will allow you to join in with prompt suggestion and voting on polls, as well as access to snippets for the next Gladiator chapter 6 days before release!

[lgbtlunaverse]

I'm a little bit insane about how in novel canon the whole xiyao ending where Jin Guangyao wants to die with Xichen, who accepts, which then makes jgy change his mind and pushes him away at the last second isn't actually explicit. A lot of adaptations chose to make it so but in the novel this is all VERY up for interpretation.

Here's what actually happens in the text: Lan xichen stabs jgy, jgy moves away from lan xichen, xichen follows him, wwx realizes jgy is about to open the coffin and calls "watch out!" to lan xichen. Jgy unseals nmj, pushes xichen away, nmj kills jgy and they are both dragged into the coffin which is sealed again.

Here's what wei wuxian, our narrator, thinks is happening: Jin Guangyao wanted to lead lan xichen to his death out of revenge for stabbing him. Lan Xichen, unaware, simply followed Jin Guangyao to try and stop him from getting away. Wei wuxian's warning came too late, but Jin Guangyao- for an unknown reason- changed his mind at the last second and pushed lan xichen out of danger before lan xichen had any idea of what was going on.

Here's what most fans as well as the teams behind several adpatations think is happening: Jin Guangyao leads Xichen to nmj's coffin to die with him, Xichen accepts, because of this acceptance, proof xichen still cares for him, Jin Guangyao pushes him out of harm's way. Wei Wuxian just doesn't get that gay people who aren't him or Lan Wangji exist.

Here's what ALSO MIGHT BE HAPPENING: Jin guangyao wants to die in a different way than he is currently dying. Maybe he's afraid of what'll happen to his body after his death like he was scared for his mother's, maybe he wants to confront nmj one last time now that there's nothing more for him to lose, maybe - if he can't take her body with him- he'd at least like his final resting place to be where he buried his mother. Lan Xichen thinks he's trying to get away and follows but Jin Guangyao, who despite everything doesn't want him to die, pushes him away. Xichen doesn't know what happened until it's already happened. What he would've wanted if he had known remains up in the air.

Or, alternatively: Jin Guangyao's reasons are as above, but unbeknowst to Wei Wuxian, Xichen DOES know what jgy is about to do and either misinterprets this as an invitation to all die together, or inidividually decides he, too, is done, and wants to join his sworn brothers in the grave. To Jin Guangyao this has nothing to do with Lan Xichen, and he still doesn't want him to die, so he pushes him away against Lan Xichen's wishes.

Every single one of these interpretations is unhinged and they are all supported by the original text. It's like a choose your own adventure of tragic gay endings.

[earl-grey-crow]

.

[sysig]

Let me chew you out a little, since we have a couple minutes (Patreon)

[Panel 1] Prismo: *mumble* *mumble*

[Panel 2] Prismo: *mumble*

[Panel 3] Simon: Hmph. “Just because it’s in your head-”

[Panel 4] Simon: “-Doesn’t mean it’s yours,” huh?

[Panel 5] Simon: Give me all the responsibility with none of the privileges?

[Panel 6] Simon: And then you get mad at me for trying to pick up your slack? Prismo: Hey...

[Panel 7] Simon: Clearly you already expect that much from me!

[Panel 8] Prismo: Hey, hey! I did the best with what I had! I didn’t expect any of this!

[Panel 9] Simon: And yet you didn’t even consider telling me, so we could’ve avoided this?

[Panel 10] Prismo: It’s not like I could’ve just- taken it out! I was locked out!

[Panel 11] Simon: You could’ve done something!

[Panel 12] Simon: Instead you let my life spiral around this thing, kept me tethered to Ice King’s Madness-

[Panel 13] Prismo: Fionna and Cake are real thou- Simon: NOW you tell me! After I find out for myself!

[jokersenpai-thenavigator]

Why You Should Play: Oxenfree

*Spoilers for an 8yo game!*

Oxenfree’s story isn’t terribly complex. It takes maybe 4 - 6 hours to beat, depending on how much of the collectable content you’re aiming to grab. Game play primarily consists of walking around the island, talking to your friends, and fiddling around with your pocket radio.

But DAMN does Oxenfree do well in its execution.

The aforementioned radio, as your primary means of interacting with the island, is an amazingly implemented mechanic. You can go through the entire game, only using it for its intended purpose, and it is entirely valid.

But.

If you take the time to scroll through the radio stations in different locations - even outside of the “anomaly” areas - you’ll get little pieces of information and world building.

Music stations exist, though they only play music from the 1940’s.

Certain stations in certain places will broadcast messages in Morse code, which, coupled with the opening call signs from the anomaly stations and the freaking beats in the game’s main music track, led to an ARG back in 2016 when the game was released.

Sometimes, you’ll get clips from old interviews.

And sometimes…you’ll hear yourself. Having conversations that haven’t happened.

And that’s just the radio mechanic.

Another main gimmick of the game are time loops. You’ll occasionally get stuck in a loop, only able to escape once an old magnetic tape player appears, allowing you to break through the frequency of the loop. The time loop will visually appear on the screen as almost VHS quality static, like the world around you is physically being paused and rewound each time you make it to the edge of the loop.

The screen distorts with static, gets flipped upside down and your dialogue choices reversed, still images of nautical blueprints and old photographs flash for a brief second. In the background, seemingly innocent trees and stones will twist and distort into towering monsters, eyes glowing bright against the darkness of the island, there for only a second, leaving you to wonder if you actually saw something, or if it was just your imagination.

There are moments in the game where Alex’s reflection will speak to her, giving her advice. At the moment, the information seems…strange. Nonsensical. You tell yourself to let Jonas speak to his mom - who is dead. You tell yourself to let Michael know to stay with Clarissa - despite Michael having died years ago.

The information doesn’t make sense…until you approach the end of the game. And then you have to decide whether or not to believe your reflection, and make your choices, until at the very end of everything…after everything that you’ve experienced in your play through, everything you’ve learned…you have to tell your past self what to do. The entire time, it was you.

The game ends, your futures are set…and then, as Alex is narrating her closing statements…the audio distorts. Alex says that she has to pick up Jonas for Ren’s trip to the island. The screen gets staticky, and goes black.

And then fades in on Ren, describing the history of Edward Island.

You are on a boat.

At the beginning of the game.

And you are aware that you’ve been here before.

**Link to information on the ARG, because HOLY SHIT I WISH I COULD HAVE BEEN THERE FOR THIS!!! https://wiki.gamedetectives.net/index.php?title=Oxenfree#:~:text=The%20Morse%20code%20in%20the,to%20go%20to%20Edwards%20Island.

[leapinarmadillo]

my review of Moonwalk: hot mess. ★★★.

[mossterunderthebed]

Y'know what honestly frustrates me about the JJK fandom?

When people make stuff that's like JJK 0 Gojo and Getou talking or whatever, and it's like Getou being totally deadpan about all the horrible things he's doing/going to do/believes in *insert various types of wholesale murder here* and Gojo just laughs along, treating it like it's a joke and Getou's so cute and funny.

Like, no.

Gojo did NOT indulge Getou's philosophy. That was The Whole Point.

What do you think the whole encounter on the street in front of a random KFC was about? That's why there was such a deep divide between them. That's why Gojo was furious and disbelieving. That's why they didn't see or talk to each other for TEN YEARS even thought they were best friends.

Because Getou killed people, chose to kill people, and chose to keep killing people. Because he dehumanized an entire, MASSIVE group of people who were good, bad, kind, cruel, and everything in between, men, women, children, everyone, simply because of something they couldn't help and didn't even know about. Because he took advantage of those that Gojo had decided and felt duty-bound- even though he didn't like it much- to protect.

(And all that came BEFORE Geotu ever stepped into the picture. Yeah, Gojo whines about having to protect the weak and admittedly thinks it's a drag, but he still does it. He was raised with the ideal that he should do it.

That wasn't a Getou thing. Getou believing in that as a teenager did change the way Gojo saw it, but it wasn't New. He already was raised that way, believed that way, and intended to live that way, or why go to Jujutsu High at all? Even if he found it annoying, he was still always going to become a sorcerer, not only because it was kind of his only option- which is it's own kind of horrible- but because he was a sorcerer, down to his bones.

He had that madness in him, and maybe it was nurtured, but that doesn't change the fact that it was there. He wanted to be a sorcerer, loved fighting and killing curses, whether it had anything to do with helping others or not.)

I know it's just fanart and fandom, and look, I myself really like art of Gojo and Getou in their good days. They were kids and they were happy. While I don't ship them, they were best friends, and their own kind of soulmates, I've never not believed that, it's too forking obvious. Gege practically shoves it down our throats and literally designed them to balance each other and be Messed Up Forever when they split. Every official art we see of the two of them practically has them as each other's reflections. I know, okay? I can't not know.

I just get really frustrated when Gojo's disregarded like that. He is his own person with his own beliefs who's made his own choices. They both are. And maybe it's dumb to get up in arms about a story that's not even real, but Gojo's a really imperfect person who struggles and suffers, and at the end of the day? He tries his best.

Even with all the power in the world, he's still only human. He can still only do so much. He's expected to be more than he is a lot of the time, and still he really tries. He wants to make the world better. He wants to make life better for the next generation. He has, in a way, given up on himself, but he's still going, because he knows his place in the world is still one that needs filling.

That's a narrative that means a lot to me. It's disheartening when it's misinterpreted because of the fun, silly, giggly side of his personality, or the reckless, careless, cocky side, both of which are wonderfully, excruciatingly human.

That's all.

[hide-your-bugs-away]

hearing Alan talk about how much he liked Albert Grossman and Eric talk about how much he liked Brian Epstein makes my tiny emotional brain implode like GHGhHhh the Animals' actual manager was Not Good!!!!!!! they were actively looking at the managers of their contemporaries and wished they could've had that instead!!!!!!! 🥹