#will I study or work on this short story?

[gladiatorofturtles]

Learning to interpret texts is a skill that requires exercising and practicing to get better at; so I *highly* recommend toughing things out and using Sparksnotes as an assist, rather than a replacement. I get that it's not fun for everyone getting stymied by older language or really opaque (to us) language structures, but this is a skill that can help you in a *lot* of areas. Everything from greater ease reading and writing e-mails, to having an easier time interpreting literature and poetry (which also has knock ons, like making it easier to follow and understand stories even in other mediums, or just follow threads in conversations). I know that at least North America has greatly devalued the humanities, particularly the study of literature and art, as something worthless. The truth is that the skills you learn can be applied to most jobs. Even if you end up working construction, being able to understand what's being communicated to you is an important skill, and that's what reading hard to understand texts teaches you. It gives you flexibility and depth with language, and teaches you to pick up on nuance (which I'm autistic, so I *know* nuance can be hard to get, but you can learn to catch it and interpret more and better than you currently do). Also, there are whole worlds out there in books and other texts; amazing, far flung places, familiar and comforting places, wild fantastical places, and so many inner worlds of emotion. The selection is incredible and so varied, you will never run out of things out there to read and experience. Having assistance when you're out of your depth is good, but if you're not doing any of the work in interpreting it's ultimately short changing you, and what's it's costing you is access to all those stories, more stories than you could ever dream of.

what is HAPPENING

[monocodoll]

MonocoDoll's Vile Ventures 1.1.1 Update

It's been a short while since the last update for Vile Ventures. For the last month, I have been working on a small quality of life improvement update. As well as a small Menstrual Cycle mod that will release the same time as this quality of life improvement update. The 1.1.1 version of Vile Ventures can be located in either Simblr.CC or LoversLab.

1.1.1 Update Notes

Quality Of Life Improvements

Ingame Tunables:

You will no longer have to enter the Package file for Vile Ventures and edit the XML Tunable file to make edits. Nor, will you have to exit your game when you desire to change a tunable. You can now directly change a tunable while you are in the game.

All tunables for Vile Ventures are included and were attempted to be organized as possible.

Drugs Will Now Inform You How Much Uses They Have:

You can now hover over a Drug Object such as a a White Widow Baggy and it will inform you of the amount of uses it has left.

Display Timer For Curing Cannabis, Cocaine Bricks, Meth Packages, Drying Tobacco Leaves, and Aging Tobacco.

AutoSoil For Drug Plants

All drug plants now have an AutoSoil version. 6 Cannabis Strains, Coca Plant, Opium Plant, Tobacco Plant, and Shrooms.

These are mainly used for: "plants have an "autosoil" version that can usually be found in buydebug. If you use that version of the plant, it will always be at a mature stage. If that plant is on a community lot instead of residential, it will never die and even produce some harvest every now and then."

Bug Fixes

Fixed Missing Icon For Coca Leaf Ingredient

Fixed Issue With Fertilizer Strength For Drug Plants Showing as Unlocalized String

Fixed Issue Where OnlySims Comments Appeared as ___ . This was previously the case due to me using Emoji's and the game not being able to make them appear. Loveternity has completely editted out the emojis 🤗

Fixed issue where newborn babies could select the Drug Dealing trait as one of their beginner traits. 😭

Fixed issue where Teenagers could not take Selfies or use a video camera for Simstagram.

Fixed issue where Talk About Drug Study and Tell Funny Drug Story is viewable for other household members.

For more information, the MonocoDoll's Vile Ventures mod is available on Simblr.CC or Loverslab.

Simblr.cc - MonocoDoll's Vile Ventures 1.1.1

MonocoDoll's Vile Ventures - The Sims 3 - LoversLab

[slaaverin]

To hell and back

This post is very difficult to make for me. This is not about BTS, or about fandom, but about mental health, and my personal story. I never really opened up about it anywhere except in a few facebook groups. But today is the day I decided to speak about my story.

It is surely more for me than for you.

Very few people in my friends and family can really understand what I have been going through, because it is a topic so complex that even I have trouble understanding it sometimes.

Well, firstly, I am schizophrenic. At least according to science. If you asked me though, it would be a different answer.

The truth is, I became spiritual again when I was 25, not long after discovering BTS. I took on a meditation practice and grew my consciousness very quickly.

Someday, I had an idea on how I would be able to help the collective, and I thought about becoming clairaudient (hearing the other side). So, I "hear voices". I followed my intuition on how to achieve this, and after some time it actually worked, I could hear.

So this ability to hear was totally consented on my part, I wanted this from the start.

But yeah, according to science, when you can hear anything, they put a schizophrenic label on you. I think it's mostly that they are in over their head with this kind of subject, and they simply don't understand everything enough to really be able to help anyone, except with medication.

Unfortunately, the universe is bigger and more nuanced than a label, so I never really got help from psychiatrists. I had to navigate through this on my own.

Everything was going fine at first, I was learning how to use this ability, and things were going well.

But someday, everything went to shit.

I won't go into that much details, I'll spare you, because it is pretty horrific. But long story short, I made a trip to "hell". Literally.

Of course, I myself do not believe in the christian hell. I've studied spirituality enough to understand it is not that literal, and there are many realms with different purposes.

But there are some dimensions that are close enough of what we would imagine hell to be like. And I have gone there.

I spent 2 weeks in 2 dimensions at once. In my physical body, but also in this dark dimension.

It's not really important to believe in this, or to argue whether it was real or not, because the thing is, my experience, impressions, feelings, all of it, were real to me. It felt real. It felt tangible. The mechanics does not matter, what matters is that I experienced it, and the trauma from it was real.

It was the most horrific, the darkest, the most twisted, so terrible that words cannot even give it justice. It is an experience that I felt somehow was a glitch in the matrix. Like we should not be able to experience something like this, it should not be allowed.

But it was. And no matter how much I cried for help, prayed all the gods, begged, no one came to save me. I could not sleep, did not eat, and barely functioned during those 2 weeks.

I felt left there, abandoned, alone, helpless, in total despair and horror, and with a pain that was so profound that I thought it would kill me. I was patiently waiting for death to take me, in how much my heart was broken into a million pieces.

I got annihilated entirely by the end. No emotions, no thoughts, no personality, no beliefs, nothing that made me me, was left.

I was gone, an empty shell. I had been entirely destroyed. A metaphorical death.

But something was left. A tiny flicker.

It was the light of my consciousness, my divine spark.

I understood then that even the worst darkness that exist would not be able to destroy my light, and that I was eternal.

So all of my fears vanished. I began clinging to that light and use a strength I didn't even know I posessed to crawl back from the pit of my own hell.

I had PTSD for years after this experience. And it was not truly over. I was still plagued by many interferences, trickster energies, evil things.

But over time, I healed, and brought back the pieces of myself that were scattered, and my psyche, even with PTSD, began to mend.

But now I had to learn how to play "the game". How to not get tricked, how to keep my internal balance despite being surrounded by nothing but darkness.

Some day the darkness put so much pressure on my being that I thought of ending my life. And that's not really like me, because I'm really pro-life.

But it's like I've been through some fucking intense internal military-like training, with no rest, with no pause, and no mercy. Ever.

It pushed me to my limits.

So of course I transformed. I became stronger mentally, I learned discernement, I took my power back, literally my entire being was totally refined.

I mastered "the game" of darkness, outsmarted them, mended every breach of my psyche, moved past all my fears, and my mind became as cutting and sharp as a knife. It took me years, but I learned the lesson. And I can say that darkness was my greatest teacher. The wisdom I gained, there is really no price for it. In the end I saved myself.

Today, I am good. I work very hard to keep my internal balance, to remain optimistic, to keep spreading love around me.

If you saw me you wouldn't tell I have any particularity lol

But to say this whole process has been hard is a understatement. It is SO FUCKING HARD like it's so hard and complex and layered that's it's really a bit ridiculous?

Sometimes I feel like I'm in a very bad movie, so I guess the universe and my higher self really have a weird sense of humour. But I laugh it off too because it's better than crying about it.

I know we are never alone, and that everything supports us, but the illusion that we are is really strong sometimes. Almost no one would be able to understand my experience, without having lived it, so I feel like I'm bearing this cross on my own.

But you know, all of this really puts things into perspective. The fact I have been in a place such as this, survived, and came back, makes every other little problems in life feel truly trivial.

I don't know what your faith is, it is not really important. What I learned in my studies is that most people who actually go to those places had things to learn, it's never "some punishement". It's clearly not because I deserved it.

But I did my share of learning indeed. Today I feel like I am a better version of myself thanks to this experience.

I believe it was for my highest benefit, because I can't reconcile senseless pain and hurt in my mind with a loving god. I know things aren't random.

It all began because I wanted to help. So in sharing my story, I want you to share a message of hope.

The deepest pain, the darkest fear, nothing that is abyssal and scary and any emotion you might feel, none of it will actually hurt you. You cannot be hurt. You cannot be destroyed by anything, ever. We just think that some emotions will kill us, so we avoid to feel them. We fear, so we flee.

If you actually embrace your fears, it won't kill you. It will liberate you. Nothing else will happen.

You know why we come to earth to have crazy experiences and we don't mind the trauma and the pain that come with it? Because our souls know that we are not taking any real risk in the first place.

Your light is deeper than the deepest fear, largest than the most painful hurt, and you are safe at all time, even if it doesn't feel like it.

So please, rest easy, don't take life so seriously, it's all going to be ok. We will all wake up from this dream someday and go back to love, and it will only be a memory, a blip in our eternity.

We are safe & loved.

I think I needed to get all this out of my chest.

(Please don't feel the need to psychoanalyze me or feed me religious doctrines, I had years to process and really understand the mechanics of everything that happened to me so far, but obviously I didn't want to turn this post into a million words so many aspects are left out.)

Thank you for reading my post and take care💜

[haedia]

It's such a delightful dynamic. I would love a short story or something about their student days.

Emmrich brings a bit of temperance to their friendship and Johanna quietly lives for the times when she can goad him into (politely) saying something unkind about a visiting noble or someone equally grating. He never does it within earshot, of course, though that doesn't stop her from trying.

She is a catalyst for their studies, pushing Emmrich to go further, make deeper connections. Just by being her friend, she builds his confidence in himself. She wouldn't put up with him if she didn't respect his intellect and skill. Her wit may be razor sharp but he's learned to hear the compliments layered in among her quips.

And, though she is loath to admit it, he is a respite. Emmrich makes sure she's fed and hydrated when she's caught up in a flurry of experimentation and research. It's only later that she realizes how much the care he's shown her has helped her progress. Had he not been there, she would have passed out from exhaustion far more frequently than she did.

It still rankles her when he suggests she sleep.

"It's only been twelve hours!" She shouts, not looking up at him from her hunched position over the apparatus on which she's been working.

"Only twelve." He replies, his tone even yet still accusatory in a way only he can leverage. "You're going to make yourself sick and what good will that do us? Let me finish the calibrations while you rest."

It's an old refrain between them but a comfortable one. They bicker some more before he can convince her to at least lie down on the couch in their office adjoining the research lab. She, of course, claims she's only going to rest her eyes for a moment, how she just knows that if left to his own devices, he'll muddle up their notes, but she's out cold in under a minute.

He continues where she left off. He organizes their data and makes new connections, setting up the next phase of their research with those in mind, and if Johanna realizes it was something she missed in her frazzled state, she doesn't bring it up. But she also doesn't claim it was all her own work. Because, above all else —their differences, their passions, their skills — they're a team.

Emmrich Volkarin and Johanna Hezenkoss really demonstrate the underutilized relationship dynamic of unabashed hater/kindest person alive.

[tojiscrack]

wherever you are right now, good morning/evening/night… that was a mouthful, but i’m not sure how else to start this.

it sounds serious, i know, it’s not, don’t worry, but i like being dramatic, haha, you know me ;) i have a small announcement to make — i say ‘small’ ‘cause it really can be done in one or two short sentences, but i’d like to give you some context and reasoning because i care about every single one of you reading this, all 470 of you, and i’d hate to leave you without an explanation.

i’m mainly addressing my LL (liar, liar) readers, ‘cause i seem to have a big following and a large number of people who interact with me because of that piece of work, but this also goes out to the very few people (and i’m not being dramatic when i say very few people, lol) who are loyal readers of SOANO (start of a new obsession).

i am going on hiatus.

yeah, i know, boo, tomatoes, the story was just getting started 😠 , etc, etc.

and i apologise.

genuinely, from the bottom of my heart, i’m truly, deeply sorry.

you’ve been forced to tolerate my extremely sporadic updates that were only just starting to get better (some updates would come weekly, whereas others would take two more weeks, but never an entire month like before). i really am sorry. i know what it feels like to enjoy a story and then be left on a cliffhanger (of sorts?) when the author goes on a hiatus — mini or not.

i think this long message will answer most of the questions you have in mind, the first being ‘how long will you be on hiatus for?’. and i do have a straight answer for that:

five months.

i know, it’s a lot. again, i apologise. i can’t apologise enough, but let’s keep the questions going.

the one i know you’re all wondering — why am i going on hiatus in the first place?

just to be clear (for those of you who have genuinely become close friends with me through interactions) i’m alive, healthy, and well! i’m not falling out of love with writing, i’ve not fallen out of love with LL or SOANO (no matter how slow the updates for the latter seems to be) and i’m not feeling pressured by writing either of these stories for you all!

the reason is quite simple… school :/ exams. MAJOR ones.

when i started writing SOANO, i was around 15 years old (give or take a few?) and i had no major exams at all to focus on. halfway through writing SOANO, i was met with my first set of important exams at 16. for those of you who are not british and/or not aware of the uk education system, GCSE’s are the exams that dictate which sixth-form college you go to. college, as in, not university-college, but the last two years of high school (junior + senior year) that are the only two years of sixthform/college.

when i started writing LL, i was in my first year of college at 17 (this time last year), and so the only ‘major’ exams i had were mock exams that would prep me for my university predicted-grades. i am now in my second (and final) year of college, and the exams during may and june will dictate the rest of my life. that includes which uni i go to, whether i’ll even go to uni at all, what course i’ll take at uni if i do end up going, etc.

you get the idea. these are important exams. the most important ones that i’ll ever have to sit this year, and starting tomorrow, i have 130 days to turn my very-average-grades around to three A’s (or perhaps two A’s and a B) to get into my desired uni.

unfortunately, i can’t do that if i spend most of my time writing up very lengthy chapters for you.

why can’t i split my time accordingly, even if it means going back to the once-a-month updates? because i am so incredibly, stupidly behind on content for the courses i’m taking right now that i can’t even afford to waste 30 minutes on doing anything other than praying and studying. that’s just the sad truth of it.

again, i’d like to apologise for the inconvenience. i’ve received so many lovely dm’s from so many of you (and i answer every single one, you know that) and in the conversations that many of us have had together, a lot of you use the story (LL) as a safe haven, an escape from your own messy school lives, almost in the same way that i use it to escape my messy school life. some of you have mentioned that you pull all-nighters simply to reread it all as if you’re reading it for the first time. a few of you have mentioned how this story was an escape from the tragic events of canon, which was exactly what i intended for it to be like during the planning process, and i’m still so overwhelmed and flattered by the growing love i’ve received from both old and new LL readers.

will the story be temporarily taken down?

absolutely not.

i considered it for a time, but after acknowledging those comments i mentioned above, i decided that what’s left of LL right now (170k+ words divided in 10 chapters) can still be a safe haven for you whenever you need it. i also knew that i wanted everything to look the same for when i’d return in late-june of this year. leaving it up would also mean that newer readers (future readers) would join the family too, and we love a full house ;)

will i still be active on tumblr during the hiatus?

yes! maybe not as frequently as before (like answering messages in my inbox every day) but i’ll definitely be active enough to get through any messages, comments, asks, etc, within the span of a week for sure. you can still tell me about your shitty day in my inbox, you can still vent to me about an encounter with a guy you hate in my dm’s, and you can definitely still send in silly things about LL or SOANO. i’ll still be active, it’ll be like i never left, only, without the fortnite-ly (not a word, i’m well aware) updates.

LL’s one year anniversary is coming up in a couple of days, and i wanted to release a new chapter in time for it, but looking at my exams and how much cramming i’m already going to have to do for it without writing on top of that… i reluctantly acknowledged that it just won’t be possible.

i think i’ve addressed everything… this is a little awkward now, lol.

once again, i apologise for any hurt or inconveniences i might’ve caused, but i myself don’t enjoy the idea of not writing for 5 months any better than you probably do. 0-0 i enjoy writing, it never felt like a chore to me, and i’m going to miss it during the next 5 months that i’ll be spending alone, grinding overtime like hermione granger…

please wait for me, my little liars <3

love, mother hen sumaya

[stargirl230]

quick sketch + paintover while i try to remember how to art again...also I think nami deserves more fight scenes

(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)

[eyepatchdate]

*starts another time loop premise* im sorry, time loops really are THE fic premise

[mishkakagehishka]

I'm like if a living girl were a rotting corpse

[themyscirah]

footprints -

In this too, Diana is like her mother.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/60400699/chapters/154170976

https://superlove.sayitditto.net/works/717/chapters/1004

[vampmilf]

if i had a nickel for every time that i started as a trainee in a business i have no experience in only for my superior to suddenly quit a few months later and then i had to take over the responsibility and teach myself everything and grow into the role and then got the actual job on a full time basis. i would have two nickels. which isnt a lot but its weird that its happened twice.

[veroinfaciem]

@allmightskitten pspspspsps I did some digging and found goodies :] (not all of them I think, but if I find more I'll make another list). Not all of them match the criteria 100% but share the same spirit or are similar, so I decided to rec them too, no harm in that after all.

🦩 A humble list:

- satisfaction by flyiing_giraffe 

https://archiveofourown.org/collections/CoraFest_2024/works/56806864

(Basically - Rosinante comes clean to Doflamingo, betrays the marines and decides to stay by his brother's side. It describes the events that come after and how Rosinante's decision changes the story.)

- Brother's Conflict by Dracula_Teeth

https://archiveofourown.org/works/54447235?view_adult=true

(This one is insanely good and also super angsty. Love it to pieces. It's the one where things went from bad to worse, Doflamingo didn't kill his brother - he captured him and took Law back. The one-shot tells what happened after, Rosinante's pov.)

- Gods Don't Die by corduroyserpent

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17797721

(Rosinante didn't stay with the marines, instead he came back to Doffy at a young age. That changes things.)

- Wish You Were Here, or: Fear and Loathing in Dressrosa by kookoofufu 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/59053168 

(This one focuses on the brothers; Cora betrayed the marines and he and Law stayed with Doffy - but now Law is off to medical school and brothers… well, they are having an adventure of their own. Haven't finished this one yet, but it's a nice oneshot sprinkled with humor.)

- Empty Nest Syndrome, or: Donquixote Brother's Idea of Fun by Flamboyant_Vampire

https://archiveofourown.org/works/53362456

(The fic the Wish You Were Here, or: Fear and Loathing in Dressrosa is based on. A sweet, short oneshot about how Rosinante copes (or doesn't cope in this case xd) with Law's absence (he went off to medical school to finish his studies). Doffy has an idea.)

🦩 And here are the fics that stray a bit from what you're looking for but are similar enough I think, so I'm listing them too:

- Donquixote Brothers AU by AkaanaWrites  

https://archiveofourown.org/series/3623230

(An amazing series where Rosi and Doffy never got separated. They think alike and so they lead the DQ Family together. No sign of Law yet, but the series is in progress as far as I know.)

-  a brother's bleeding heart by determination

https://archiveofourown.org/works/52238269

(This one is a part of the series but can be read as a standalone (at least I read it as such xd). It's a modern au and doesn't match all the criteria (years after Rosinante's 'betrayal', Doffy suddenly comes to adult Law and Rosi for Christmas) but it explores the complicated nuances between the brothers very well, and, surprisingly, they don't hate each other to the core either, so I think it was worth mentioning this fic.)

- A Battle of Will by flying_sky_neon_bread

https://archiveofourown.org/works/56067832/chapters/142406023

(This one is mine xd and unfinished yet xdd It's pre-Minion, as for now, but here Rosi and Law are staying with Doffy and are on good terms with him, so I thought I'll put it here too. It focuses strongly on Rosinante ditching his smoking habit for one reason or another. Doffy has fun with this. Law is an angry gremlin.)

That's all I was able to find so far! If someone else has some fic recs pls share, I love that trope and would love to read more 😭❤❤❤

I fear I may have already read most of them but I would love if anyone dropped their recs for fics that explore AUs where Law and Cora never left the Donquixote pirates 👀 why am I so tempted now to write an au like this, please, I don't have the time right now!!

[pilonciillo]

[violentdevotion]

Hi. Op of the college post. I wanted to extend my apology for your friend's death (i actually made the post in memory of a friend who also died) and to ask what major you were in? An essay on hauntology sounds intriguing, id be curious to know more. Well, sorry if this is random and sudden, your tags just jumped out to me in the notifications as the most interesting thing someone left on that post. I hope you have a lovely day!

thank you for your thoughts. i want to extend the same to you, i feel losing a friend so young at such an already tumultuous time in your life is one of the most difficult things to go through, but we did it 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

i studied english literature at uni. the class i wrote the essay on was contemporary world literature and the prompt was 'discuss the importance of grief or loss in contemp world lit and I chose the books Autumn by Ali Smith and Alfred and Emily by Doris Lessing (which if you haven't read already id really recommend). i think the conclusion sums up what my thesis was better than i can now 2 years after writing it

In conclusion, grief and loss within these texts are tied to nostalgia, of either objects, memory, or people. However, this grief disrupts the memory and the linear narrative, and as such time bleeds into eachother. Events from the past cannot be remembered without knowing what is to come, whereas idealisations of the future must be rooted in something from history, the consequence of which is that ‘the futuristic now connoted a settled set of concepts, affects, and associations.’ (Fisher, 2012, p.16). Difficulties arise however when these concepts and associations are established in a history of violence and loss. This exchange expresses the continuous feeling of grief, as characters are repeatedly acknowledging and ‘burying’ what ‘haunts’ them while unable to live in a future without what they have already buried. Evidently, like a leaf ‘so stuck that when it eventually peels away, it's leafshape left behind, shadow of the leaf, will last on the pavement till next spring.’ (Smith p. 259) Contemporary World Literature must constantly acknowledge the past and present while looking to the future, forcing all three to exist concurrently.

dont worry about it being random, i made the joke that the post was made in a lab for me when its actually two people coincidentally relating over similar life experiences. i hope you have a lovely day also :))))

[drysauce]

truly a blessing that im not home right now or i don't what i'd do to my roommate. fucking audacity

[mariocki]

Play for Today: Clay, Smeddum and Greenden (BBC, 1976)

"What ails you?"

"Ails her? You would greet yourself if you saw your life ruined."

"Well, I'm right sorry you're taking it like that. But, losh, it's a small thing to greet over."

[fragmentedblade]

I'm honestly obsessed with Mr. Xiao. He may be my favourite (very) tertiary character ever. I love everything he adds just by being how he is in the context of the worldbuilding and sidequests of the Xianzhou. Arguably something similar happens with master Huaiyan