#whys hide alive
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puppetmaster13u · 7 months ago
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Prompt 271
“Grandmother is visiting,” Damian suddenly said with no warning and with his usual not-quite demanding tone. 
“Who?” Tim wasn’t the only one to startle, seeing as Bruce had practically froze, a downturn to his lips in a silent show of confusion. 
Damian scowled. “Are you deaf Drake? Grandmother is coming to Gotham to, quote, make sure I am being properly cared for.” None of them had known that Ras was with anyone actually. At least Tim was pretty sure that would have been in the files. 
“Oh?” Dick didn’t quite crouch to Damian’s height but it was a near thing. “She-” “He,” Damian corrected, interrupting him. They all exchanged a glance before Dick continued. 
“Is he coming to the Manor or
” 
Damian scoffed again, a tiny bit of a flush against his face. “No, Grandmother will most likely be staying with Akhi-”
Now wait one moment-
“YOU HAVE ANOTHER BROTHER?!” 
#DCxDP#DPxDC#Prompts#Deadly Decisions#Danny & Ras are the homoerotic rivals that no one knows if they’re flirting or attempting a murder#It’s actually both they’re just also both Immortal#Danny to Jason: You can become a crime lord if you finish college- you’ve said you wanted to get a degree this is ur chance#Dusan (nodding): Mother has made all of us finish at least our basic education nephew#Why yes this does mean that RH has just made the heads in a duffel bag debut & the bats have no clue it’s Jason#Normally Danny wanders the universe but RAS (affectionately derogatory) HOW DARE U TRY TO HIDE THE GRANDCHILDREN#Morally Gray Danny#He’s well over 300 and that has an affect lol#Also has some fun fae vibes thx to his ghost half & human half finally balancing out#Let Jason & Damian be brothers#Tiny Damian: Akhi look I found a frog :>#Jason (newly not brain damaged & has no clue who this small child is): 
. That’s great#Tiny Damian: *GASP* Akhi you can talk now :D#Fuck it- all the Al Ghuls deserve fangs from ecto contamination#Is Danny actually Dusan & Talia’s mother? No one knows and no one wants to ask the probably immortal fae being okay#Danny brought Damian a ghost hound puppy & Jason an original signed Pride & Prejudice book#How come Bruce wasn’t aware of Danyal? Talia forgot to inform him that the mother she was speaking of is in fact still alive#He disappears for a decade sometimes longer she was using past terms how was he supposed to know
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s0fter-sin · 3 months ago
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god the way ghost’s voice drops when he tells soap, “you’ll need to improvise to survive”
before that, everything he says is steady but when he acknowledges that soap’ll have to do something outside his skill set, something he intimately knows to be difficult, his voice wavers. he does the same when he says, “welcome to guerrilla warfare”; it’s sombre and serious in a way he doesn’t act for the rest of the mission. if you read into it enough, he almost sounds apologetic; like he knows exactly what soap’s about to go through and wishes he didn’t have to
he keeps soap going; poking at him and making jokes, giving him tips and asking about his progress. he never lets him stop and take a second to think bc he knows the moment he does is the moment it'll all hit him; the betrayal, the pain, the fear, the deaths, all of it will drown him and if that happens, soap won't make it
he needs him to be a soldier through and through and he knows this is one of the worst kinds of battlefields you could end up on
and the only times he slips is when he acknowledges that fact
it happens again when he says, "tryin' to get you here alive and in one piece". his jovial dark humour facade drops for just a moment when he has to face the potential reality of losing soap. then he tries to pick it back up again with, "one of us has to survive to tell the tale"; completely discounting himself as a survivor to try and rally soap and make him think it’s all down to him
and soap does the same thing
when he's calling out for ghost on the radio, he's tentative, testing the frequency, then when he doesn’t get a response, he grows desperate; "ghost, this is 7-1, do you copy?"
then when ghost answers, he smooths out his voice; he hides the pain, the fear, and no matter what response you give to ghost asking if he’s injured, soap brushes it off (“i’m good”, “what’s the difference?”, “i’m not a medic”). soap decides it’s in ghost’s best interest to hide the extent of his injuries
he doesn’t know where ghost is, if he’s secure, if he has any weapons; he doesn’t even know if he’s in las almas until he says, “there’s a church, i’m headed to it”. for all he knows, he could’ve run in the complete opposite direction. if ghost knows he’s hurt, then his attention would be split between his own survival and soap’s
and soap, who lets himself be poked and prodded towards the church, needs to hide his own doubts. maybe he needs ghost to believe he'll make it so he himself can believe it ("what are my odds?" "don't make me bet against you", "think i'll live that long?" "probably not")
he all but begs ghost to tell him he'll get through it and if he knows just how bad off he is, maybe he'll change his mind. maybe he'll think he won't make it to the church
maybe he'll leave him alone for good
"you injured?"
"i’m good"
"let's find out how good you are"
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just-null · 1 year ago
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YO, SUPER LATE SUPER LONG SUPER MESSY OCTOBER POST THAT I JUST SHOVED EVERYTHING INTO BC I DIDN'T WANT TO DO MULTIPLE. FUCK IT.
I forgot halfway that these were supposed to be costumes and not mini aus... SO REMEMBER IN MY PLACE, EVERYTHING IS HYPOTHETICAL. also. some have a bit of yandere elements to them bc its SO FITTING FOR NORITOSHI.
Happy late October, everyone. it's winter now. Let's get it, baby.
[Long rambles and doodles under the cut!]
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Vampire!
I kept asking myself, "How sexy is too sexy.." and "How the fuck does a sexy vampire even look like without it being a shirtless guy w fangs or Edward Cullen....." I think I figured it out
Sure, sure, vampires are superhumans with sun allergies that can drink blood really hotly. They can also easily overpower you to feast and blah blah blah, but what if said vampire (Noritoshi) was too weak to do any of that? Not literally, but he craves your say. He wants not only your blood but your affection. He wants to get praised as he drinks you in. Are you comfortable? How much will you allow him to take? Do you want to get him back in return? Guidance with this makes him feel more at ease. It's still Noritoshi at the end of the day. He's going to find a way to be a little awkward about you because of his crush. He refuses to drink from anyone other than you, even if it causes his death. Therefore, he has to keep you healthy! For the rest of your lives..! Besides, he can't really go outside or else he'd.. y'know. So if you think about it, this is a very beneficial relationship for both of you!!
The only downside is that you're losing blood on the regular, and for some reason, more people are moving away... Probably nothing, right? Noritoshi is always there to keep you company and help you recover anyways.
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Witch!
my attempts also bled into the witch design.... you got greedy with requesting two in one ask, but I'll spoil you this time bc I also wanted to see Noritoshi as a (sexy) vampire and witch. heh. AND I DIDNT REALIZE HED BE SO CUTE AS A WITCH..... WHAT THE FUCK?? rip momo, fight for your title of cute witch...
Noritoshi strikes me as one of those witches who'd rather be left to their own devices because they're running some important magic whatever in the background. though, he'll take some breaks and indulge you if you insist on having him around. Insist meaning you pass by and strike conversation, leaving him to neglect anything and everything to prioritize his time with you. He doesn't want to use magic on you unless it's beneficial for either you or both. Noritoshi likes a natural progression with you that he knows for a fact is true and not some product of some spell. Though it doesn't mean he wouldn't use charms and such to get you to interact with him more often to speed up the process!
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Can't sleep? He has a remedy perfect for that! Bad luck? Oh no, take a charm. Nerves? A potion he perfected will help you ease your jitters. Annoying peers? With a snap of Noritoshi's fingers, they're gone! Just don't ask what happened. Enjoy yourself instead and come to him with any new issue. He's quick to resolve it.
Definitely has some sort of doll that looks suspiciously like you.. Noritoshi would probably talk to it and practice one liners that give you the strongest sense of nostalgia once he uses them. He's simultaneously giddy that the charm he put in the doll works but also a little annoyed that his hard work isn't surprising you, but leaving you with deja vu.
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Idol!
i was crying the entire time bc what does an idol look like.... noritoshi is handsome enough to be an idol without actually being an idol... now i can confirm that idols are very well dressed though. thumbs up 100% but i had some thoughts...
[Idol]
Noritoshi would be the type to cherish his fans, but hold clear favoritism over you. he'd be those idols that look cold, but they talk, and they sound smug in a charming way. i don't know much about idols, but i know he'd be so fucking good.... he'd be the type of guy to sing to you amongst the hundreds in the crowd.... ahhh the interviews w these famous aus. they're just talking and acting like themselves. can you imagine Noritoshi getting asked the question if he has a lover or not? he can lie, im sure you're alright with that, but he doesn't want to!! he does have someone!!! someone he loves more than all his fans love for him combined!!! he just can't say it for the sake of your privacy and his career. so Noritoshi does what any charming guy who's good with their words does. he deflects the question. answering the question, but not really, that'd be something he's known for. fans online are split on why Noritoshi does this. some think he's trying to keep that side of his life private, others think he's trying to mess around, and others think he's hiding a secret lover!!! though the last one is usually seen as the outlandish one, sometimes it makes Noritoshi's heart drop bc they get some things right. "Having a lover is a complicated question hidden behind a simple disguise. If I had to answer, I'd say my lovers are my audience. they make sure i'm well cared for, some more than others." AND HIS FUCKING LITTLE SMIRK I CANT COUGHS UP BLOOD. IM A THEORIST TOO. SECRET LOVER. đŸ«”đŸ«”đŸ«”đŸ«”đŸ«”
ON THE FLIP SIDE....
[Not an Idol]
An amusing thought where Noritoshi goes out in his casual clothes, and he's mistaken for an idol. No one knows who he is, but he just looks like he'd be one. bro's just trying to buy groceries, and now he has a fan group asking him to take pictures with them.. He'd tell them that he's just a guy, not an idol, but the group would still want a picture with him. it'd be a waste to pass by someone who's so naturally gorgeous, so with a sigh of defeat, he relents. It's just a photo, right? No harm done. Noritoshi'd go home and feel overwhelmed/embarrassed by the whole ordeal. later, he gets a call from someone in the kyoto group or you to inform him how he's all over social media, known as that handsome guy in the supermarket. HED BE COMPLETELY UNREACHABLE TO MEDIA OUTLETS BC NORITOSHI IS THAT GUY WHO DOESNT HAVE SOCIAL MEDIA.... he'd have to make one to make sure no one pretends to be him online. "Hello, I don't use social media, but I've been informed I've been getting attention online. To prevent anyone from being fooled by an impersonator, this is my official and only account. thank you." P.R. STATEMENT WRITING ASS.. his single post gets flooded with likes, comments, and DMs. it almost blows up his phone..... he was just buying bread, dude...... people try to dig up and find him through the other Kyoto group's social media.
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[bonus] my second in command requested to put him in a fem idol outfit bc he thought it was funny. after frothing at the mouth and coughing out blood, I complied.
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Doctor!
THIS IS SUCH A STRAIGHT FORWARD ASK BUT IT HAS SO MANY IMPLICATIONS. MY BELOVED CULT MEMBER.. THOSE EMOJIS GIVE ME A DIFFERENT IMPRESSION BUT IM NOT SURE.
Noritoshi as a doctor...... apple sales would plummet. his little clinic's business would skyrocket. sick cases would peak in his area. getting your heart checked by his stethoscope would be so fucking embarrassing bc all he'd hear is THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP
LIKE IMAGINE IF THAT WAS YOUR DOCTOR? BRO.
COUGH COUGH HACK WHEEZE COUGH COUGH.
Noritoshi would probably own a small clinic that he wants to expand. That or he opened one after working for a hospital for a while. He's a great doctor who's most likely respected but a pain in the ass to work with. Among patients, he's gotten the hot doctor reputation. Most want to be treated by him, but he's so professional, any chance of trying to flirt goes down the drain. Yeah, he puts his hair up to avoid it in his face even though his eyes are closed classic lab safety procedures. He seems like the type to have a soothing but authoritative voice during examination, so he gets his message across. it's a bit difficult when dealing with patients for Noritoshi. If he sees them too often, he firstly scolds you for not taking care of yourself, then feels guilty for not giving you the proper care. Keep yourself safe and healthy, or else Noritoshi will clearly :( Putting him in a yandere setting would be dangerous. He'd have a lot of control over you, considering he can prescribe medication, shots, visits, and other things.... he'd have a ball.... nothing that would cause you any harm, of course. he's only looking out for you and doing what's best for you..!
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Pirate!
my second in command wanted a pirate. pirates are so fucking cool and i know damn well if this guy were a pirate he'd have a bunch of battle scars under that fancy coat.
Noritoshi as a pirate would be more than a little odd, but also fitting. He looks like the type of guy who'd be well put together, yet he's willing to get his hands dirty. Like the guy who got into the pirate life because of some personal issue that couldn't be solved fast enough through conventional means. Even as a pirate, i imagine he holds everyone to high standards. They're still pirates though.. so his expected standards aren't even that high. He has more freedom here, so even he himself lets loose once or twice. Especially with you. He's even able to get away with more violent actions for you, the seas are unpredictable, after all. While taking some treasure, Noritoshi'd toss you a gem or golden coin, just so you can say you were the first to claim it. Just so he can see that happy glint in your eyes when getting your hands on treasure. God forbid anyone try to get their hands on your hard earned goods. They'd be met with a bullet to the foot or a sword at their neck. Everyone and their mother knows how you're his favorite, but Noritoshi downplays it. Its not a crime to help out someone from his crew is it? Not in the seven seas. He leans more into his cold ruthless killer side here. He has goals and people to help keep in line whether hes captain or not. Yet when around you, he's almost adorable in how he shows you a pearl so entrancing that it reminded him of you.
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Corpse Bride!
my submission to my Noritoshi Halloween costume closet.. CORPSE BRIDE, THIS MOVIE FUCKS. esp w the yandere elements.
Noritoshi 100% made you recite the wedding vows to him before accepting the ring. If you fumbled up, he'd correct you with SO much attitude and expect you to start from the top until you got it perfectly.
Hypothetically, in the chalice scene towards the end..
Noritoshi is the type to never be fully relaxed unless he knows for sure you'll be eternally his. In this scenario, YOU proposed to HIM but have to die to continue being together. Not only that, but someone in the living world is also after your heart. Someone who bleeds. Someone who's the obvious choice. Someone who can give you the life that you deserve. Someone who will succeed in their pursuits if you. remain. alive. Noritoshi's life was cut short, yet he still managed to lose so much and be abandoned a considerable amount of times. When he meets you and finds out about the possibility of having to go through that again even in death, it finally clicks in his rotting mind. He realizes he's been doing something wrong to keep constantly failing. Noritoshi revises his methods to a more.. selfish course. Why should he care about anyone else's wants or how his actions hurt them? You were the only one who made him truly fulfilled, to make him feel alive. The only one who deserves anything and everything good that comes from this world. Destiny is never done toying with him when he realizes your marriage is invalid because of your pulse and his lack thereof no matter how hard he'd try, but the opportunity arises. of course, he's ecstatic to give you an afterlife worth much more than what a silly beating heart can achieve. "All people die eventually. If you miss your living family or friends, all it takes is patience, darling. I'll wait by your side in the meantime." He weighs the pros and cons of everything, but when it comes to swaying manipulating your thoughts he only highlights the ones that'll get you on his side. in this case, the pros of dying to be with him! Honestly, the answer was so obvious that Noritoshi didn't know why he was stressing about it before. It hurts him to see you in any type of pain, but he reassures both himself and you that it'll only be for a moment. Afterward, he'll have the rest of your afterlives to make it up to you!! What happened to Till Death Do Us Part? Noritoshi thinks it's insulting that something as shallow as that could be so widely accepted. If your love were true, it wouldn't stop just because the world decided to take them away. "Till death do us part? Darling, don't be silly. 'Not even death will do us part' feels much better, doesn't it?" 
#noritoshi#kamo noritoshi#noritoshi kamo#noritoshi x reader#kamo noritoshi x reader#noritoshi kamo x reader#yandere noritoshi#yandere kamo noritoshi#yandere noritoshi kamo#merry october#???#ragingbisegzual#charamander459#I FUCKING LIVED THROGUH THIS GOD I FELT SO BAD I TOOK SO LONG ESP SINCE ITS ALREADY HALFWAY INTO NOVEMBER BUT HERE WE GO. BABY IS HERE#i thought i was so smart making this look like a fashion show. anyway hi im still alive just busy#vampire and witch nori were makin my brain fry bc all the outfits for guys were their shirt off. it was both funny and testing my creativit#as for idol.. heh. <- in love with forbidden love and secret relationships and 'we shouldnt be doing this' 'i know' *does it anyway*#I WAS TEARING MY HAIR OUT AT DOCTOR. LIKE I LIKE THE CONCEPT BUT WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO.. PUT HIM IN SCRUBS???#im not upset im just so entertained by how straight forward you were yet there are still so many implications in this ask#LIKE YOU WROTE FOUR WORDS AND TWO EMOJIS AND THATS ALL IT TOOK FOR ME TO DO A DOUBLE TAKE#now that i think abt it. i shouldve put him in a hot nurse outfit... //punches myself in the face#THATS WHY ANY FAMOUS/ROYAL/REPUTATION AU IS MY SHIT BC THEY HAVE TO HIDE THEIR RELATIONSHIP/EACHOTHER AGH FROTHS AT THE MOUTH#i love how the pirate noritoshi is a cool guy until he sees you and turns into a simp#CORPSE BRIDE WAS SO SELF INDULGENT. THAT MOVIE FUCKS SO HARD. THE USE OF 'DARLING' WAS BC EMILY USED IT IN THE MOVIE#IT HAD SO MANY YAN VIBES BUT FUCK. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO BE SUCH A GREEN FLAG EMILY. I LOVE YOU#heh. the lace and mask are supposed to represent the bones and such. didnt mean to give him a phantom of the opera look.. though it fits...#null rot
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tanglepelt · 1 year ago
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Dc x dp idea 76
Both worlds are different dimensions.
Danny has always had a mark one that was a clear (shape/animal/hero symbol/whatever) on his wrist. Since the day he was born. His parents always just told him it made him even more special.
The nasty burger explosion happens.
He can’t go to vlad so he hides in the realm. Only to fall through a natural portal.
It’s then the mark gains colors.
Danny realizes the marks are soul-marks in this dimension. I prefer parental marks so that’s what the rest of my idea is for but it could be romantic/platonic as well.
Danny who just lost his entire family and feels completely at fault just says nope. he won’t risk it being a thing. It’s not even his home dimension anyways. So like it won’t match anybody anyways. Right?
So he hides the mark and just goes about life as a homeless teen with superpowers.
He’s not out looking to be a vigilante but if something is happening infringe of him and no one else is acting he will.
One day he gets caught in a bad fight. Ends up injured probably helping someone else not get hurt.
It’s then the soul mark is revealed to be for *insert dc character name here*
For some angst. Danny was original born in the dc. When a mark blackens it means the other person is dead. Or in this case separated by different dimensions. So for a year or two the other person had there marked colored only. Then Danny “died”.
The other person thought he was dead.
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gumy-shark · 2 months ago
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Do you ever think about Mobs repressed anger. Do you ever think about his manga lines about just how badly Reigens lies fucked him up. Do you ever think about how he felt like nobody would actually come to help him, nobody would actually be there if he needed, nobody would actually be around him if it wasn't for the Mob persona. Do you ever think about how he felt like any good traits in him were a lie he made to be liked. Do you ever think about how he thinks the only way to be truly seen is to tear apart his life from the ground up so nobody will try to use him anymore. Do you ever think about Shigeo
”the only one who ever saved me was me” but angry! because he shouldn’t have had to save himself! (and also him Needing to shatter everyone’s perception of him in the most destructive way possible because if there’s even a chance that they genuinely liked him. that they would accept him even when he’s the monster he’s been afraid of his whole life. then everything he’s done and believed and every part of himself he’s suffocated to death- wasn’t necessary. if people other than tsubomi (or possibly ritsu as per the manga) can understand and accept him as he “truly is” then he could’ve been a Person this entire time!!)
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frenzymutt · 9 months ago
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Here's some Pythor art with a rushed background 'cause why not
I finished season one of Ninjago and I'm onto season two! I'm having fun rewatching it, it's been so long
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goodoldfashionednerd · 5 months ago
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Sorry to Claudia, but I think all vampires are assholes, actually. It comes with the immortality and it's what makes them entertaining to me specifically
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tropicalcontinental · 1 month ago
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anyways is Hungry straight up a guy in a hoodie? And entity in a hoodie?
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(Its kinda hard to see, but it's clearly the most human entity we have seen)
Like who is that guy what is that guy
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Is this them??? a cannibal ghost??? Bro
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another-clive-blog · 1 month ago
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Back to thinking about Claire and Clive and their traumas born from the same tragedy yet entirely different
You ever think about the fact that Clive's parents were (almost) never directly mentioned ? Layton mentioned them for the backstory talk and that's all, objective "they are dead" statement. And the other time we heard about them was in the flashback. In both of these cases, they're only evoked to announce their death, nothing else. We never get to hear about them in present tense, Clive himself never speaks about them. They're just... Gone. They won't come back, not thanks to revenge, not as ghosts, not even in discussions. They're dead and they'll stay dead.
On the other hand, Claire is very much alive- or at least she looks like it. Even before we get to the Claire reveal, every character keeps her memory alive. Dimitri is doing this all for Claire, Layton is a living tribute to her, Don Paolo's character is linked to her choices. She's everywhere and haunting the narrative before we ever learn that she is literally haunting the narrative. She's corporeal enough to change things yet her time is up, so really how much change can she bring ? She is stuck in this transitory state where she doesn't get to live yet can't die and disappear either. Even if she were to die once and for all, most of our characters would still have her as a driving force. She is forced to influence this story far beyond her death.
I wonder how they got along. Clive for whom death is absence, it is forgotten family and empty homes, and Claire for whom death is life persisting, loud with memories and transcending feelings.
#I think Clive fucking hated her. Yet felt close to her at the same time#He initially bonded with her as in 'she died too' but then when she actually came back he got jealous and furious#Why does she get to come back. Why her and not my parents ? Were my parents not loved enough ?#Were they not special enough is that it ? I'm sorry they didn't get a tragic enough backstory. So sorry they were collateral damage.#He resents her and she's upset too. Claire isn't furious at others like him but she's bitter that she still got her life stolen.#She's as disgusted as Clive. You wanted your parents kid ? I wanted MY kids. I wanted my fiance. I wanted my life#Of course there's something infinitely valuable and beautiful about Claire's loved ones keeping her memory alive#But there is also something deeply human and heartbreaking about it. She should have lived. She wanted to. Why is that not enough#Claire and Clive are similar in that way I think. They reek of certainty brutally ripped apart and broken pieces that won't fit anymore#Their relationship is made of intense resentment and bitterness. But it only hides the grief and loneliness killing them both#clive dove#claire foley#professor layton and the unwound future#professor layton and the lost future#unwound future spoilers#lost future spoilers#my stuff#my analysis#Time duo#Honestly I went for these two but every single character's way to deal with grief is so interesting.#I love Clive's 'My parents are dead and they're gone forever and I don't get why I should have to accept this' but they're all amazing
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eggy-tea · 1 year ago
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For a movie featuring basically zero explicitly queer characters, Across the Spider-Verse was pretty fucking queer.
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puppetmaster13u · 6 months ago
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Prompt 321
You know Content Warning? Lethal Company but youtube videoing? 
Danny does that- just well, with the Zone. It’s not like it can be mapped out, what with people moving their Lairs and more lairs and islands constantly manifesting. And well, there’s so many things out here, and it’s not like he can be an astronaut.
So, he decided to make exploration logs for the Zone instead, alongside his friends and a doppelganger or two holding equipment. It’s great, and people can donate whenever he live streams so he’s getting income too. 
He just erm, maybe should have double checked it was uploaded to just his dimension

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mushroomrealestate · 1 year ago
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The people have spoken I guess! Hear me out-
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My little pony was a very wholesome thing for me growing up and very much influenced me artistically ïżŒfjdjfjdjf thankfully I was not exposed to the more infamous aspects of the fandom. (I was traumatized by Gravity Falls content thank you very much.)
I don’t think anyone asked for this, but too bad you get it anyway! I pony-fied your Tokyo Ghoul and there’s nothing you can do to stop me!
I can’t tell if this is blessed or cursed I’m just thankful I can still draw ponies it’s been years! Just a silly little doodle that started as a joke but I don’t think it’s a joke anymore 😳 regardless behold my magnum opus. Cringe culture is dead and I’m dancing on it’s grave.
Kind regards,
-Your local girl who is super emotionally attached to Tokyo ghoul characters, despite not watching/reading it in years because it would most likely ruin the far superior version she has invented in her head. She seriously needs new hobbies.ïżŒ
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flowercrowngods · 1 year ago
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i don't know how to be merely acquaintances when we used to be friends. or i think we used to be. i don't know how to yearn for a simple hello when you've been heaping your affection on me months ago, and i don't know how to talk to you when you won't say anything. when suddenly it's all about me. you know i have nothing to say, you know my brain is void of everything but horribleness and i cannot tell you about my day because i don't even know about my day. i cannot tell you about my day when i know you won't listen, when i know you'll apply your philosophy to my world and don't believe me when i say that everything is terrible. i don't know how to be the person you seem to think i am, or the person you want in your life. i don't know if you want anyone else in your life now that you're in love and sappy, found another recipient for your affections, leaving me empty and wounded and yearning.
you said you missed me. said it many times, while i was gone. now i'm back, have been back, and i wonder how you missed me, why you missed me, when you won't talk to me. i think you mistook missing for worrying. i think you mistook caring for a feeling of obligation. i think you like missing me more than talking to me.
and i think i can't breathe with how much that hurts
#how do you miss me when you won't talk to me? how do you like me so much and then go to just. not?#how did i let you in when i try so hard not to let people do that because i know that once they get past the walls all i'll be left with#is the idea of them rotting and withering inside me. polluting the space i create to keep myself safe.#why does everyone leave? leave in silence too. leaving behind so many questions and so many words engraved in my brain#i am so tired of *grieving* when those i grieve are still alive and well and thriving and i'm reminded that it's versions of myself#that i'm grieving instead. how do you grieve yourself? how do you not fucking fall apart over it?#just. fucking talk to me. don't make it be true that all i'll ever be is nothingness and the memory of someone you liked once#but never never never liked enough#i'm so so cold already. i'm a shell. i want to be warm again but it always leaves me so hollow and hurting#i grieve the dio who was warm. i grieve them i miss them i am so so angry that he had to leave. to hide. with no way out#i'm happy for you. i'm happy you're happy. but you're no better than anyone else and it makes me want to run away again#but i have nowhere else to run and no one else to be. and it's so fucked that it doesn't matter who i am i'll never be enough#for someone to just. stay. to see me and to stay. to hear me and to sit and listen and just. just fucking stay.#maybe i'm not worth staying for. maybe there's nothing to know nothing to hear nothing to see nothing to listen to nothing to find#maybe all i'll ever get is one/two good months paid for with a lifetime of grief. and i'm at the point where i don't want the good months#anymore with you or anyone else who tears down these walls with affection that is so endlessly addictive and leaves me yearning.#on the off chance that it will keep the grief away too. but that's the thing about grief isn't it? it's here to stay. unlike you#god this is so fucked up and i'll delete this later but for now i just need to. let it out. poe said i should make a side blog for the grie#but poe's not there anymore. poe has stopped starting fires. so this goes on main until shame makes me take it down#blah#personal#not st
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xoxoemynn · 4 months ago
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Feeding Daphne is so easy! I just have to grind up and combine all her supplements in a bowl and have two spoons (a large one and a baby one) at the ready, wait 30ish minutes so she's not suspicious, wait until she's seated in a good, easy to approach spot, sneak into the kitchen, quickly and quietly grab her food from the fridge, use the big spoon to scoop her food on top of her supplements, and then very casually approach her with the bowl and the baby spoon! From there I just have to spoon feed her with the teeeeeeeniest tiiiiiiiiiiniest bites because she's just a baby and has delicate sensibilities. Usually after about 15 minutes she remembers she likes the food and will take bigger bites! And if she keeps spitting out that one capsule, it's okay! I just have to keep trying, and if it gets too difficult I can smoosh that too. Super easy to do that with a tiny rolly capsule and a little baby plastic spoon.
idk why I ever complained.
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problemswithbooks · 1 year ago
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With the tentative and rough translations out, i have to say, yeah, Hori really doesn't get what he's actually writing and if he was trying to make Toga's entire deal a metaphor for queerness, he's ended up being quite offensive.
Like first off it seems he has Toga say she falls in love easily with boy and girls and...animals. Which, I always felt the bird thing as a kid could have negative connotations, but wrote it off as 'she was a little kid and this was before her desire for blood was wrapped up in her romantic feelings' type things. So having Hori reinstate that yes, she does still love animals to the point of blood drinking desire--a desire Hori coded as sexual/romantic is not a good look.
It also just makes me question if she could ever own a pet or if she'd end up killing it because she loved it to much and she needed to drink it's blood.
Also getting her perspective on the boy she attacked isn't great either. The translation is rough and basic so it could change, but I don't think there's any translation that could make the situation not read poorly.
In the rough translations she says something along the lines of "I didn't ask to drink his blood because I was afraid he'd hate me and think I was a decent monster."
I could see an alternative translation being "I asked for his blood and he called me a deviant monster, and I sucked his blood."
Again if Hori is trying to make a queer metaphor with Toga, this is a huge issue. Her attacking the boy was always a big problem, but if he didn't bring it up again I think a lot of casual readers would have forgotten it. But now it's front and center again and brings back bad connotations for Toga and a queer reading of her character.
Because again if we read her blood drinking as queerness, and Hori has already coded it in the past as lust while just last chapter confirming that Toga sees it as kissing in the very least we get two equally bad reads.
A) Due to fear of rejection Toga did not ask for consent and decided she'd just make sexual advances toward someone she had a crush regardless.
or B) She got rejected and told no, and then made the sexual advance anyway.
With a queer reading this only becomes worse because it pays into the really negative and even dangerous idea that same sex attracted people will go after anyone regardless of consent or the other persons orientation. It continues to perpetuate the idea that queer people are sexual predators, who target straight people or in the very least do not care about consent, or are unable to control themselves long enough to get it.
But even without a queer reading what Toga did is wrong. It sucks that people don't get her way of showing love, but consent is still needed regardless. You can't just do what you want to someone because you were to afraid to ask them out. You can't just do what you want with someone after they tell you no. Even if the boy had called her a monster that would not make it ok for Toga to, essentially sexually assault him (yes, kissing someone against their will is sexual assault, which is what Toga sees her blood drinking as).
And I think that's why Toga's character is really hard to get behind for some people--because at the end of the day she's literally just saying "I can't help but sexually assault people (and animals apparently)', and the solution to this is to give her exactly what she wants and apologize for not seeing how much pain she was in when she was actively trying to sexually assault people.
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cometrose · 2 years ago
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zhongli thoughts im bored
i am obsessed with the imagery of him holding a golden fan just below his eyes and gazing over the city
highly proficient in all makeup, cosmetics and accessories, you need to dress up nicely for a fancy occasion he can have you looking like a goddess just give him some time
he sits in the sun a lot, when he had the exuvia he would sit on the tallest mountains and sleep in the sun
Unlike the other archons zhongli is closely attached to the sun, he is like the sun in many ways, he guides people, brightens their lives, plants and life thrive under his care
However the sun is still deadly, those who get too close to him burn up in his presence and those who keep their distance are trapped in the shadow he casts and lose themselves, like the sun in the sky he is meant to shine brightly all by himself
i am obsessed with the imagery of zhongli sitting in a bathtub and all of his draconic features just come out one by one, first his arms turn gold and then come his claws. Next comes the horns on the top of his head as his hair grows longer and longer. Last is the tail which flops over the edge of the tub
He can't sing but he has some talent with instruments, a habit he picked up from being around quizhong, ping and venti for so long, he can work with string instruments best
He will pat your head, he can't help it, if hu tao has her hat off and she makes him smile that hand will be on her head
crazy thought of the liyue gang playing hide and seek, like xiangling, xingqiu, yunjin, xinyan, hutao and chongyun playing this huge game and they run all over the city it becomes a huge affair at one point xiangling is "it" and she can't find anyone but she comes across zhongli sitting in his favorite spot at third round knockout and she's like "sorry to disturb you but have you seen hu tao" and he smiles and is like "well i don't know about the director but i saw a blue haired exorcist up at the terrace he might be around the glaze lilies" and xiangling thanks him and goes to chase chongyun down, zhongli whispers behind him "she's gone" and then 4 of them, xingqiu, yunjin, xinyan and hutao just poke out from behind him (they want to keep hiding behind him but with a smile he shoos them away to play the game properly)
zhongli is painfully popular you can take the man out of the archon but you can't take the archon out of the man
zhongli likes to keep the moon by his side specifically the people who are like the moon; guizhong, venti, xiao, azhdaha, rukkha, ganyu the list goes on and on -perhaps they are naturally drawn together its unclear who gravitates to who but even liyue itself is a beautiful moon he can cling to
zhongli can petrify things with his hands, just lightly brushing his fingertips over anything will encase it in stone and with a short breath it will crumble to dust
mr. workaholic the reason why we never see him at work and always on vacation is because he goes crazy and completes all the paperwork and it scares hutao so she kicks him out (but then he spends all his money so he has to come back the cycle never ends)
as a consultant zhongli takes on many jobs if they hire him from wangsheng he’s quite expensive though ganyu tries her best to direct the qixing away from him but some things are unavoidable and they require his assistance
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