#why wouldn't it's head be a scammer too

[beardedmrbean]

Facebook's former diversity program manager has pleaded guilty to stealing more than $4 million from the company through fake business deals in exchange for kickbacks to fund a luxurious lifestyle, federal prosecutors said Tuesday. 

Barbara Furlow-Smiles, 38, served as the lead strategist, global head of employee resource groups and diversity engagement at the social media giant while she orchestrated the scheme, the Justice Department said. From January 2017 through September 2021, she led Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) programs at Facebook and was responsible for developing and executing DEI initiatives, operations, and engagement programs.

"Furlow-Smiles used lies and deceit to defraud both vendors and Facebook employees," said Keri Farley, Special Agent in Charge of the FBI's Atlanta office. "The FBI works hard to make sure greed like this doesn’t pay off and those who commit fraud are held accountable."

Furlow-Smiles committed the fraud by linking PayPal, Venmo, and Cash App accounts to credit cards given to her by Facebook and used those accounts to pay friends, relatives, former interns at a prior job, nannies, babysitters, a hairstylist and others for goods and services that were never provided to the company, a federal complaint states.

It was unclear if her associates were being charged in connection with the fraud. 

After those people received the payments, they kicked back a percentage of the funds to Furlow-Smiles, prosecutors said. The kickbacks were paid in cash and through transfers to accounts in various names, including the husband of Furlow-Smiles, prosecutors allege. 

Some of the kickbacks were allegedly paid in cash sometimes wrapped in T-shirts and other items, the FBI said. She also had Facebook hire vendors that were owned and operated by friends and associates who also paid kickbacks, authorities said. 

To conceal the fraud, Furlow-Smiles submitted false expense reports claiming the individuals performed work on Facebook programs and events, the DOJ said. After they were hired, Furlow-Smiles allegedly approved fake and inflated invoices. She received a portion of the money paid to the vendors under the table. 

Furlow-Smiles also misled Facebook into paying money to entities who didn't provide kickbacks, including nearly $10,000 to an artist who created specialty portraits and more than $18,000 to a preschool, the complaint said. 

"Motivated by greed, she used her time to orchestrate an elaborate criminal scheme in which fraudulent vendors paid her kickbacks in cash. She even involved relatives, friends, and other associates in her crimes, all to fund a lavish lifestyle through fraud rather than hard and honest work," U.S. Attorney Ryan K. Buchanan said. 

Furlow-Smiles used the illicit funds to fund a luxury lifestyle in California and Georgia, prosecutors said.

[archiverstappen]

the cat sitter (part 15) ✧ max verstappen

max verstappen x fem! reader

previous part | masterlist

loosely inspired by the story on how max lost his cat

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maxverstappen1

liked by charles_leclerc and 2.827.515 others

maxverstappen1 🐈

view all 1.736 comments

landonorris Never beating the crazy cat lady allegations

danielricciardo 😍

yourusername i miss you ed, edd, and eddy. gone... but never forgotten 😿

↳ maxverstappen1 you named them?

↳ yourusername yes? 🤷‍♀️

username i dont care guys this is enough sign for me, it’s canon

username please tell me that she at least kept one of those cats

↳ yourusername maximus won’t let me keep them 💔

↳ maxverstappen1 Pretty sure that’s illegal 🤗

bffusername so is this the reason why you always take so long on your dates? because y/n can’t resist touching every single cat on the streets? [deleted]

bffusername cool pics! 😁👍

↳ yourusername ouH GIRL WHEN I CATCH YOU

↳ username PLEASE TELL ME THAT I WAS NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO SAW THE DELETED COMMENT 😭

username don’t know about you guys but the hand on her head awakened something feral in me

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yourusername

liked maxverstappen1 and 231 others

yourusername these are a few of my favorite things 🫧 🤍 🎶

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landonorris He got game after all

↳ yourusername unlike you

↳ landonorris OUCH??

↳ maxverstappen1 😂

maxverstappen1 Lovely 🤍

bffusername this cake looks way better than maximus' birthday cake, progress!! 💪🏼

↳ yourusername 😎

bffusername now i'm curious, what did you say during mario kart? 🤔

↳ maxverstappen1 A lot of curse words

victoriaverstappen Enjoy your holiday guys, see you soon! 🧡

↳ yourusername MAX AND I WANT TO BABYSIT LUKA AND LIO AGAIN!!

↳ maxverstappen1 Y/N......

maxverstappen1

liked by yourusername and 2.103.273 others

maxverstappen1 More passion, more energy ❄️

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yourusername i kinda hate you right now ngl

↳ maxverstappen1 She's so brave, she's well behaved, she's not afraid 💪🏼

↳ yourusername HUSH

yourusername delete??? or i'll post a video of you dancing to 'paint the town red'??

↳ maxverstappen1 YOU WOULDN'T DARE

↳ yourusername I SAID WHAT I SAID 👹

↳ username y/n i would give you my cat if i could see a video of max doing a tiktok trend 🧎‍♀️

↳ yourusername check your dm please xoxoxoxo

yourusername MORE FOOTWORK MORE FOOTWORK 🕺🏽

charles_leclerc 😂

alex_albon Fucking finally 😮‍💨

landonorris I called dibs on being captain of the ship

↳ bffusername hi there, sorry to bother you. y/n's bff here. that position is already taken 🙏

↳ username speak uP? danielricciardo

↳ danielricciardo I don't engage in useless banter, I already have the position of being the godfather of their future child 😁

↳ landonorris exPLAIN??? maxverstappen1 yourusername

username the fact that this post has better engagement than max's wdc post i-

username now we know how max knew all of the viral tiktok sounds 😭

↳ yourusername we're planning to make a tiktok couple account

↳ username ?!??!?!??!?!??! ARE YOU FOR REAL

↳ yourusername please don't take it seriously, I WAS JOKING 😁🙏

--

author's notes: eden the scammer is back after 2 months guys, so sorry for making you guys wait too long (and giving you guys false hope) 👹 really hope you guys liked this one hehe, i also take additional request for tcs!! (but as you probably know, it's gonna take me 8273 years to finally post it). there are some references from my lando series in this part, so if you're interested you can also check it out 😙 LOVE YOUUUWWW, now i will hibernate for another 5 months 🤸‍♀️

taglist: @flwr-stella @reidsworld @myloverjk-blog @debss-319 @hiraethrhapsody @electrobutterfly @love4lando @lunnnix @allenajade-ite @jjsprobablywrong @whoreks @soleilgrec @oscarwildingsworld @christianpulisic10 @thievin-stealing @glitterf1 @elliegrey2803 @trouble-sistar @escapism-writer @cornerofacry @hollie911 @weasleyswizarding-wheezes @ad-astra-again @canyon-lwt @thecubanator2 @lifesuckslife @leclercloml @sunny44 @nmw-am @sachaa-ff @multilovebot @glow-ish @moneygramhaas @whitefireproofs @icarus-nex @iloveyou3000morgan @ccallistata @copper-boom @fictionalcharacterslut @celesteblack08 @maxiel-jpg @slytherheign @lunyyx @series-books-food @coffeehurricanes @shrimpyshrimp @somanyfandomsbruh @justcallmeelli @laneyspaulding19 @ironmaiden1313

pictures (c) to pinterest

[mrschampion]

💋ཾ ༚ MY STARGIRL

summary :: Your dear boyfriend Ethan Landry came rushing back from "econ" just to find you fresh out of the shower in your room with only a pair of underwear on. Too distracted with your music playing in the background you didn't hear him but instead heard the ringing of your phone. No caller id. Will you pick it up or just let it keep ringing?

warnings :: 18+ smut. Reader is a female. Use of profanity. Praise kink. Sorry if there's any typos, English isn't my first language.

word count :: 1.5k words.

I had a vision

A vision of my nails in the kitchen

You were in your room with only a newly worn red lace bra and panties on, as a towel laid neatly wrapped around your head. You just got out of the shower and had music playing in the background from your tv that hanged from the wall.

You were currently sitting in front of your vanity mirror doing your hair before applying your nightly skin care routine on.

You pumped out lotion from the container and smeared it all over your legs, making sure not to miss a spot. You reached up to your thighs before a ringing noise started echoing. Your phone was glowing a bright white as your room was dark, the only source of light was from your LEDs that were set on the color purple.

Not bothering to change into pajamas just yet you got up and reached over to your phone to see the number.

No caller ID.

You were smart enough not to answer these types of calls since it's always just some scammers talking about your bank account. But tonight you were more bored than ever, not having your boyfriend Ethan Landry around since he had a late night class at econ.

You swiped right to answer the call "Hello?"

A sudden raspy voice was heard over the phone.

"Hello y/n."

You put your free hand on your hip, leaning to the side a bit to stand comfortably. "Oh? So you know my name, that's good" You said in an almost teasing tone.

"Yes of course, why wouldn't I know such a pretty lady's name? In fact you look quite good tonight my dear."

You raised one of your eyebrows and quickly looked around your room to see if anyone was possibly lurking in the darkness. Finding nothing, you decided to check the last place in your room.

You stood in front of your drawn curtains, twirling a strand of hair with your finger. "You really think so?" You asked as you stepped closer to your bedroom window to open the curtains.

Scratching counter tops, I was screaming

You peered out and looked left and right but found no one. With a sigh you stepped back, closing the curtains again with your phone still next to your ear. Then came a whisper, it definitely did not come from your phone speaker but instead it came from right behind you

"Oh I know so."

Suddenly strong arms wrapped around your waist as a head filled with curls rested on your shoulder, cold lips smothering your neck with kisses.

"What happened to econ?"

"I had better things to do."

You chuckled seeing that he was still in his Ghostface outfit just without the mask on as it was in his hand. You shifted your hips a bit so that you could lean back against him but instead your ass was met with a hard and throbbing boner that Ethan must've grown when he was speaking to you on the phone.

You resisted the urge to tease him but failed. With one swift movement you turned around to face him with a smirk on your face. "Like what?" Ethan unwrapped his arms from your waist and instead rested his hands on your hips, pulling you closer towards him. He leaned into your ear and held the top fabric of your panties.

"You."

Ethan was quick to pull down your underwear, making you kick it off somewhere in your room. "Jump."

You were quick to follow his order and jumped, wrapping your legs around his waist. He walked over to your neatly made bed that was filled with pillows and soft blankets. He laid you down, hovering over you. His curls dangled in his face as he slowly made his way down to your already wet pussy.

He watched as your slick covered your folds. He looked up at you, locking eyes as he pushed your legs apart to make room for his head.

Ethan was always a shy and nerdy type of boy, an obvious virgin. But that all changed once he got with you, now his confidence was always through the roof when he's horny.

"I didn't even touch you yet and you're already this wet?"

You snickered at his words, kinda embarrassed knowing that what he said was true. "Oh shut up Mr ghost face."

Ethan furrowed his eyebrows and softly bit the inner corner of your thigh to tease you. This caused you to yelp and squeeze your legs shut, trapping his head in between them. He took this as his cue to start licking up your folds, sucking on your bundle of nerves from time to time.

Your fingers grabbed onto his curls from the sheer pleasure. You arched your back and peered down to only be met with the top of his head as his whole face was smothered in your dripping pussy.

Your legs were shaking, close to finishing on his face then suddenly Ethan stopped. A whine came out of your mouth, pulling his face closer looking for any type of friction.

"My girl, be patient for me."

Ethan untangled your fingers from his hair and crawled up towards your breasts. He pulled the fabric upwards to get a better view on your nipple. "Red was always my favorite color, especially on you." He said before putting your left breast in his mouth, sucking on it like a baby as his free hand landed on your right breast to fondle with it.

Ethan pulled back and licked your hard nipple, keeping his hand on your other breast. He looked up at you as you were already looking back down at him. He grazed his tongue up your chest, all the way to your neck to suck on the bare skin.

He left hickies and bite marks on your skin while his hand left the warmness of your breast and laid on your hip, moving up and down.

"Please Eth stop teasing me."

"Oh yeah? Tell me what you want, pretty girl."

"Need you in me."

With that Ethan was quick to pull down his boxers and line up his throbbing dick up to your folds.

"Do you want me to count down?"

Even at times like this Ethan was always careful and patient with you, knowing that it's painful for the first few seconds.

You shook your head and signaled him to continue. "No it's ok I trust you."

‘i trust you’

Those words hit Ethan's heart deeply making him slam into you causing a loud moan coming from you and Ethan. Your hands found their way onto his back, nails digging into his skin as Ethan thrusted deep into you.

Ethan watched you arch your back as he grabbed onto your hips to make you stay in spot so his dick could sink deeper into your warm hole. Ethan wasn't much on the thick side but he length on the other hand was a different story

"Eth I can't- it's too much"

And I shouldn't cry, but I love it, starboy

Tears filled your eyes as you stuttered from the overwhelming pleasure. Ethan hushed you and wiped away the salty tears that dripped down your rosy cheeks.

"Shh yes you can, you're taking me so well."

Ethan lifted your legs, putting them over his shoulders so he can thrust at a better angle. He leaned down closer to your face, pressing his lips to your parted ones. He shushed your whines with sloppy kisses. Ethan pulled back as a string of saliva connected between your lips and his.

Your legs started to shake around his shoulder, you were getting closer and closer to finishing on him. Ethan felt your walls pulsating around his shaft. "Go on pretty girl, squirt for me." Ethan placed his hand on your stomach specifically on the spot where his dick was making a bulge. He pushed down on it making you feel it more.

Soon enough a wave of pleasure hit you like a truck, your whole body was shaking. "Ah shit Ethan!" You moaned, hand gripping the pillow behind you as you squirted all over his lap and upper stomach.

Your juices were dripping down your thighs while Ethan continued his thrusts, chasing his own high. You felt him twitch inside of you as his pace quickened. He stuff his face into the crook of your neck before letting out a quiet whine.

You felt his hot cum ooze into you before he pulled out, carefully dropping your limp legs on the soft bed and collapsing beside you.

Ethan watched as your chest rose up and down, you were trying your best to catch your breath.

Your hair was messy as some strands stuck onto your sweaty forehead. Carefully Ethan picked you up into his arms, bridal style as he walked towards the bathroom to run a bath.

"You did well my love, I'm proud of you." He said while giving you a kiss on the cheek.

I just wanna see you shine 'cause I know you are a stargirl.

[merakiui]

hello i would like to ask your thoughts on playful land's writing 👀👀👀

mostly cause i rarely think when i read (brain off kind of activity for me) but i do think it interesting to hear people critique writing or plots

Hi hiii!! >w< thank you for your interest in my thoughts!! I'd like to preface this by saying that I adore Playful Land. The aesthetics, Fellow and Gidel, the horror potential, etc!! Now having finished the event, I am left with thoughts!!! It's difficult to put everything into an orderly list because my brain is very scrambled egg, so I'll just ramble. Please forgive me. ( ‘ ﹋ ‘ ; )

Most of Playful Land's potential plot holes or ooc moments are patched up once you factor in Fellow's magic (specifically his UM). It gives it a crutch to lean on if and when you begin to think too deeply about the characters in the plot. Like, for example, why Leona or Vil or any character known for being more level-headed and reasonable and not nearly as easy to sway are so quick to change their tune.

Questions like that one are then answered with "it was probably Fellow's magic" or "Fellow's flattery works wonders because NRC students love being praised." But even for someone like Jack, who is clever enough to recognize a scam, who was very suspicious during book three's events and even more so after coming face to face with Azul..... perhaps the stakes would have been even higher if the cast was just comprised of the characters who fall prey to those schemes more easily instead of the logical types (Leona, Vil, Jack, Trey, etc).

Just,,,, they literally go to school with smarmy, smooth-talker scammer Azul Ashengrotto who speaks in too-good-to-be-true terms much like what Fellow does. How did they not put more thought into how suspicious it is that this strange man shows up, offers tickets to an amusement park FOR FREE, and then continues to lick their boots with compliments even while they're there at the park...... T_T

But the magic of an amusement park is that you sort of lose track of time when you're there and you get so wrapped up in everything, so perhaps that's also at play here (and the excitement and wonder of it all considering the park is so elusive). The fun and whimsy blind you to everything else, and with Fellow's magic supposedly at play..... it's a recipe for the perfect veil over logical thought. Maybe if not for Fellow's magic nudging certain characters into forgetting their worries and just having fun the entire event wouldn't have unfolded in the way it does.

But back to the plot!!! It's really good and horrifying as the students are captured and turned into puppets. Deliciously so. Fellow is very set in his goals and with those moments MC shares with Gidel (like talking to him about school in a way that makes him falter, so much so Fellow has to step in to dissuade the mere idea of school) it almost seems like it's setting up a betrayal on Gidel's end (I was genuinely hoping for something like this,,, I will not lie LOL). I think that would have been fascinating to see. A cruel kick in the stomach to Fellow and what he stands for if Gidel somehow helped the NRC students or got in the way of Fellow's plans.

I do think it's interesting commentary on the privilege and magic of this world. How these institutions favor those with money or powerful magic (or both). How you're set for life if you have either. If not for Fellow having second thoughts about why he's even doing this in the first place and him having realized he's sick of answering to his rich boss, the NRC students wouldn't have been freed. And even if Fellow did succeed in trafficking them, not only is it a scandal for NRC (one Crowley absolutely cannot afford) if a group of students go missing, everyone is going to notice international celebrity Vil Schoenheit is unaccounted for or that the Kalim Al-Asim is gone or even Prince Leona Kingscholar. ;;;;;

Also,,, the way the event wraps up. How there really isn't much punishment or legal consequence dealt to Fellow and Gidel. They sort of just,,, get to escape it by hopping back onto the destroyed park-boat. They still committed crimes and have done so multiple times in the past. They are (most likely wanted) criminals. Are none of the NRC students going to report them? Why didn't they just grab the two of them and hold them there? How are Fellow and Gidel going to survive out at sea with a ship that is hardly staying afloat!!! It leaves you with more questions. Also also,,, I'm assuming the other park-goers were returned safely to land as well??? Where were they during the final showdown with Fellow and afterwards when everyone is released from the puppet magic and the park is destroyed?? They sort of fade into obscurity and aren't mentioned again.

I think if I was kidnapped, turned into a puppet, and nearly sold off (and also taunted endlessly by a certain fox) I would have quite the mean grudge against him. orz why do the NRC students just let the two of them get away...... >_< at the very least, the way they handled the clean-up with Rollo was smooth-ish because he's given the choice to live as a liar and a bad person or come clean about everything. But even then I have thoughts on that and that's an entirely different event.....

I am very fond of the concept, though!!! A traveling amusement park (that's actually a front for the evil that goes on behind the curtains) on a boat is so cool. And the idea that no one really knows what happens to you afterwards because all they ever see online are pictures of you having fun, oblivious to the scheme beneath the glitz and glamour. It's so very terrifying. But once you begin to apply logic to various areas of the plot and the characters it starts to unravel.

Or,,, at least,, those are the humble thoughts in my brain. Please take them with a grain of salt. OTL maybe they're mostly nonsense and I might have missed some critiques I wanted to write,,, regardless, I am still a big fan of Playful Land and Fellow could do despicable things to me. ^3^

[owl-falls-au-gravity-falls]

Stan talking to Bill Owl Falls AU | Stan hablando con Bill Owl Falls AU

IN ENGLISH

Bill: What are you doing here?

Stan looked at Bill, they were back in their mental escape, the reason for his visit was for desperate measures, right outside his head he was trying to stop Hunter from hurting the other kids. He knows that Belos had control over his mind, so he wouldn't allow him to continue hurting that child... But for that, he needed Bill's help.

Stan: Look, I know I told you not to interfere with anything in the physical world and all that, and I wouldn't come here if it wasn't to ask you for help...

Bill:Hahaha! At least you're honest, flea-eater - he laughs mockingly as he sits down on an armchair that appeared out of nowhere -

Stan: Just listen, please! I need you to help me, I don't know how to get Belos out of Hunter's head, and with every second that passes, we could lose him!

Bill: And why do you think I care about that, furball?

Stan didn't want to say it out loud, he knew the answer, he knew it perfectly...

He and Bill were one and the same, two sides of the same coin...

I didn't remember this until a few weeks ago with the help of Ford...

He was horrified, terrified, livid, and mortified all at the same time... all he could do was rage at this new revelation. The revelation that he was Bill Cipher and everything he had done under that name haunted him as the man he was now.

I wasn't sure if I would remember everything as time went on and less important memories would fade away, But I was sure that in his mind there were memories of a life as a swindler demon.

He regretted everything. Everything. He had regretted a lot back then too, but now he could look back with the wisdom that his second chance had given him.

... Oh titan, this was crazy. And that's even with the Collector and Belos here...

No, he wasn't that person. Not anymore!

And in the end it was not like Belos, nor the collector, nor Bill!

It was different now. He'd lived a different life. A life with people who loved him. Even if they hadn't always been the best. Eda, King, Luz, Fiddleford, the kids... Ford....

Oh Titan... Ford didn't know... But he could already sense that he had figured it out after Stan left the subject hanging.

How was he going to tell Ford all this? Was he going to? Would Ford even believe him? Would he think Bill was back? That Bill had taken over Stan's psyche or merged with Stan? That last idea disgusts him...

No, it wasn't Bill, even though he had his memories, he wasn't that person anymore, and he refused to accept Bill even as a part of himself...

Bill: I can hear all your thoughts, mangy... And I don't like the idea of us being the same person either...

Stan sighs heavily, he didn't have time to ramble, he had to come to an agreement, something, anything... he couldn't allow Hunter to suffer any more...

Stan: Please, Bill... I need to save that kid...

Bill doesn't answer, he just turns his back, it was curious that they now looked the same, which reinforces the horrible thought that They are the same person, they shared memories, they shared experiences... It was a damn mirror... And the only person who could help him save his children was himself...

There was a somewhat long silence, while Bill did not look at Stan, he seemed to be thinking, considering something. What was he thinking?

Bill: ... Why do you care so much about those humans? Humans are so weak... They are easy to manipulate, to hurt, to kill... Like everything in the universe... Why do you care about those humans if you are me?

Stan: N-no, we're not the same person...

Bill: Oh, Fez, you're wrong about that... You and I are one soul sharing the same body, two halves divided by AXOLOTL... doomed to fight each other in an endless cycle... You are me and I am you... You can't escape the truth... So answer me, my future incarnation... What makes you so different from me?

Stan hesitates a little, he knew they were similar in many ways, they were scammers, survivors, people who lost their home due to a terrible mistake, who pretend to be happy when they are not, who seek something more than just what they have been given... But there was something that set Stan apart from Bill...

Stan: ...I have a lot to lose... People who need my help... And I need them to be safe...

Bill: ...Okay, I'll help you...

Stan: Really?

Bill: On one condition...

Stan: Sure, one condition, why not? ... What do you want?

Bill: admit that we are the same person ...

Stan: What?! No! I never-

The conversation is interrupted by screams outside Stan's mind.

Bill: Tick tock, Fez... You're running out of time... - he said mockingly

Stan: I... I... Ah! Okay! I admit it! You and I are the same person!

Bill: Very good, very good... And...?

Stan: - frustrado - Listen, you knucklehead! I have to get back there and protect my kids! I know you don't care about anything but your own ass, but I need your help! So do something good for once with your life and help me save my family!

EN ESPAÑOL

Bill: ¿Que haces aquí?

Stan miro a Bill, estaban de nuevo en su escape mental, la razón de su visita era por medidas desesperadas, justo afuera de su cabeza estaba tratando de evitar que Hunter le haga daño a los demas niños, sabia que Belos tenía control sobre su mente, así que no permitiría que continuara lastimando a ese niño... Pero para eso, necesitaba la ayuda de Bill

Stan: mira, se que te dije que no interfieras en nada del mundo físico y todo eso, y no vendría aqui si no fuera para pedirte ayuda...

Bill: ¡Jajaja! Al menos eres sincero, pulgoso - rie burlonamente mientras se sienta en un sillón que apareció de la nada

Stan: ¡Solo escucha, por favor! Necesito que me ayudes, no sé cómo sacar a Belos de la cabeza de Hunter ¡y con cada segundo que pase, podríamos perderlo!

Bill: ¿Y por qué crees que eso me importa, bola de pelos?

Stan: ... Porque...

Stan no quería decirlo en voz alta, sabia la respuesta, la sabia perfectamente...

El y Bill eran una misma persona , las dos caras de la misma moneda...

No lo recordaba hasta hace semanas atrás con ayuda de Ford...

Estaba horrorizado, aterrorizado, lívido y mortificado, todo al mismo tiempo... todo lo que podía hacer era enfurecerse con esta nueva revelación. La revelación de que él era Bill Cipher y que todo lo que había hecho bajo ese nombre lo atormentaba como el hombre que era ahora.

No estaba seguro de si recordaría todo a medida que pasara el tiempo y los recuerdos menos importantes se iban a desvanecer, pero si tenía la seguridad de saber que en su mente hay recuerdos de una vida como un demonio estafador

Se arrepintió de todo. De todo. También se había arrepentido de mucho en aquel entonces, pero ahora podía mirar atrás con la sabiduría que le dió su segunda oportunidad

... Oh, titán, esto era una locura. Y eso que incluso con el coleccionista y Belos aquí...

No, él no era esa persona. ¡Ya no!

¡Y en definitiva no era como Belos, ni el coleccionista, ni Bill!

Ahora era diferente. Había vivido una vida diferente. Una vida con personas que lo amaban. Aunque no siempre habían sido las mejores. Eda, King, Luz, Fiddleford, los niños... Ford.

Oh Titan... Ford no lo sabía... Pero ya podía intuir que lo había descifrado después de que Stan dejara el tema al aire

¿Cómo iba a contarle todo esto a Ford? ¿Lo iba a hacer? ¿Ford siquiera le creería? ¿Pensaría que Bill había vuelto? ¿Que Bill se había apoderado de la psique de Stan o se había fusionado con Stan? Esa última idea le repugna...

No, no era Bill, aunque tenga sus memorias, ya no era esa persona, y se negaba a aceptar a Bill siquiera como una parte de si mismo...

Bill: puedo escuchar todos tus pensamientos, sarnoso... Y a mí tampoco me agrada la idea de que seamos la misma persona...

Stan suspira pesadamente, no tenía tiempo para divagar, tenía que llegar a un acuerdo, algo, lo que sea... no podía permitir que Hunter sufra más...

Stan: por favor, Bill... Necesito salvar a ese niño...

Bill no responde, solo le da la espalda, era curioso que ahora se vieran igual, lo que refuerza el horrible pensamiento de que son la misma persona, de que compartían memorias, que compartían experiencias... Era un maldito espejo... Y la única persona que podría ayudarlo a salvar a sus niños era si mismo...

Hubo un silencio algo largo, mientras Bill no le dirigía la mirada a Stan, parecía estar pensando, considerando algo ¿Que era lo que estaba pensando?

Bill: ... ¿Porque te importan tanto esos humanos? Los humanos son tan débiles... Son fáciles de manipular, de lastimar, de matar... Cómo todo en el universo... ¿Porque te importan esos humanos si tú eres yo?

Stan: n-no, no somos la misma persona...

Bill: oh, Fez, te equivocas en eso... Tu y yo somos un alma compartiendo el mismo cuerpo, dos mitades divididas por AXOLOTL... condenados a pelear el uno contra el otro en un ciclo sin fin... Tu eres yo y yo soy tu... No puedes escapar de la verdad... Así que respóndeme, futura encarnación mía... ¿Que te hace tan diferente a mi?

Stan duda un poco, sabía que eran similares en muchos aspectos, eran estafadores, sobrevivientes, personas que perdieron su hogar por un terrible error, que fingen estar felices cuando no es así, que buscan algo más que solo lo que se les ha dado... Pero había algo que diferencia a Stan de Bill...

Stan: ... Yo tengo mucho que perder... Personas que necesitan mi ayuda... Y necesito que estén a salvo...

Bill: ... Bien, te ayudaré...

Stan: ¿En serio?

Bill: con una condición...

Stan: claro, una condición, ¿Porque no? ... ¿Que quieres?

Bill: admite que somos la misma persona ...

Stan: ¡¿Que?! ¡No! ¡Yo nunca-

La conversación es interrumpida por los gritos en el exterior de la mente de Stan

Bill: tic tac, Fez... Se te acaba el tiempo... - dijo de forma burlona

Stan: yo... Yo... ¡Ah! ¡Está bien! ¡Lo admito! ¡Tu y yo somos la misma persona!

Bill: muy bien, muy bien... ¿Y...?

Stan: - frustrado - ¡Escucha, cabeza hueca! ¡Tengo que volver allá y proteger a mis niños! ¡Se que no te importa nada más que tú trasero, pero necesito tu ayuda! ¡Así que haz algo bueno por una vez con tu vida y ayúdame a salvar a mi familia!

[infinizero]

Cale Henituse and Bruce Wayne differences popped into my head recently

They both,, very much cherish life but

Bruce would never kill anyone because he wants to save everyone

While Cale wants to preserve all the (relatively) innocent lives he possibly can

That is not to say that one of these things are wrong. I think that choosing to confront the worse society has to offer and deciding that their lives are worth enough to try saving is quite noble. I also think that choosing to get rid of the people who are simply irredeemable, who wouldn't live very happily even if they were somehow redeemed, is also noble.

The biggest difference between them in this aspect, is probably how much they enforce this rule on others and to what lengths they would go for this.

Bruce would choose to save the person in front of him if he could, even if it meant they would kill many others in the future. Cale would choose to let a victim of theirs dole out revenge even if it meant they died. (Raon choosing not to kill Venion v Ron and Beacrox and the assassin families that joined WS)

Which comes to my biggest gripe about Bruce

I got so annoyed thinking of this while writing that crossover I think Cale will probably embody this in it oops

Bruce doesn't kill people, that's fine, but why the hell did he save Joker from dying? Because he doesn't want his son to have blood on his hands?

So he won't stop killing when he starts? What kinda bullshit excuse is that, is self-control a myth to men? He realizes he won't be able to stop himself from murdering someone? Hang up the cowl. Cass is literally right there.

So Batman loses if he kills the Joker? So what? It's not a game. It's not a game. It's not a game. Important things need to be said thrice. So you lose the fight. So you end the single person who could not be redeemed if anyone tried, the person who killed your son specifically to get at you. Retire. Get therapy. Get better.

So his tragedy shaped him, so his ambition of helping people motivates him, then help in other ways. Hasn't this taken enough from you already? Aren't you tired? He is quite literally a billionaire. This money could be used for so many other things, just as or more helpful as his vigilantism has proved to be.

This post has derailed quite a bit whoopsie

Cale's faults, to me at least, are entirely rooted in his emotional constipation, something he shares with Bruce. I can't even blame him for it because *gestures at his life as KRS, then at his very busy life in Roan*

Anyways MOVING ON

A slight elaboration on all that would be that Bruce has contingencies in place should he die. He has successors and an entire system. Cale... Does not and the closest thing to a successor he has is Raon/On who are 6/12 as of the current canon and one is an op dragon who would destroy worlds if he dies. Bruce can die, but the repercussions wouldn't destroy the world. Cale, on the other hand...

Which takes me to how willing they are to break the law. Obv Bruce has vigilantism under his belt while Cale is a certified Scammer (exhibit... Everything), Arsonist (sea of fire anyone?), Terrorist (that time he kidnapped a king), has destroyed public property (an entire fucking island x2), has stolen items of great religious and historic significance (all the divine items, but is it really theft if it was just laying there?), led a civil revolution (elisneh and jopis), smuggling (cage and taylor into capital), and this post will be way too long if I continue.

The way they treat their subordinates/partners/kids!!!

Different versions of batman have different ways of doing it, but for the purpose of this post he is trying dad bruce (aka not the best but he is trying)

I think this is the biggest difference between them, actually, because Cale acts and tells the people around him the things they need and Bruce just... Doesn't communicate much. Somehow, they have the same communication issues and somehow they have the same emotional constipation. Somehow Cale still properly motivates his people better than Bruce does.

I feel like I've been shitting on Bruce this entire post but I genuinely can't think of anything he does that is better than Cale. Um. Oh yeah I guess his cause is technically more noble than Cale, do I think his methods are stupid? Yes. Do I like the stories that spring up from this anyways? Also yes.

This may or may not feel rushed because for some reason it posted while in draft stage but feel free to add

[nilboxes]

Light cone art so powerfully homoerotic someone (me) furiously pumped out a 6k word fic in 2 days. They're going to kill me. 🔗 : AO3

Extensive notes/ramblings below!

-

I have not recovered from the mental power I had to pool to write this lmao I couldn't do anything at work except figure these two out and why Aventurine looked so BESOTTED but the absence of the little white dots in his eyes in the light cone and in the leaked models made him look like there's such an edge to him (someone on twitter pointed out that he has no light in his eyes!) and it really fanned the flames like what the fuck is this GUY ON and why is it directed at Dr. Ratio LMAO (I mean why not Ratio is so pretty)

So then I thought, there is NO WAY Ratio is going to react surprised or scared for Aventurine he's going to be ANNOYED lmao. There are possibly 2 more chances in that cylinder before it's 100% in there and I was looking at the probabilities on Wikipedia and I was laughing at myself at how a gay ship was going to make me STUDY probability when I hated this type of stuff in university and I was like yeah Ratio will probably be like hey, you can't stop there, and pulls twice lmao

And I was thinking they would make eyes at each other homoerotically while doing so because wow sexual tension so potent you can taste it through the screen in the LC art and everything just went from there I really cannot get over how Aventurine seems so... sooooooo in love with Ratio and in my head Ratio is like this man is insane what is he on but he gets a taste of that and it's like wow it's actually a little good but Ratio is also cautious so he won't ride that wave too hard but Aventurine looks really down bad for a man who seems like he doesn't care

So initially I really wanted to wait until Aventurine came out before I start my hyperfixation train because we know so little about him other than key facts I have formed in my head-- -he's perpetual smiler (confirmed by a leak of the loading screen blurbs) and like, idk from his design it just suits him and even in his voice cameo with Topaz his VA sounds like they are smiling while they are talking ALLL the time idk at least I got this one right -mr gambling gambler who is very self-assured about his luck, mr smug man. when I wrote he'd win 99.9-0.1 he believes this and if he dies I think to him it would just mean his time's up for realsies anyway and whatever idk man is not very sane -there's some really weird leaks and I'm not sure if it's confirmed but he was invited to be a Masked Fool which made him ALLL the more interesting for me because as a Sampo Mr Scammer fan it doesn't mean if he joins the Masked Fools he wouldn't be able to amass money but this guy seems to really like the thrill being an IPC senior manager provides then which is like this guy is a lives fast dies young kinda guy -I HC from that neck tattoo he could have been an indentured servant (cough slave cough) or a prisoner of some kind, but eitherway it says he wasn't privileged in any sense of the word but the way his character design is so decked out in rings gold watches and even a bracelet it means he's climbed very far, so he is an ambitious man, lots of "material pleasures" as Dr Ratio puts it in my fic and he still wants more. That kinda guy makes for a very intense lover imo very "I get what I want" type, and I really wanted to balance that with his attraction to Dr Ratio and how he doesn't want to drive Dr Ratio away with his crazy but he's also very horny... Anyway I also totally underestimated his height difference with Dr Ratio I really should have pulled up that leak of them side by side but ahh being a short king dom top is so cute on him

As for Dr Ratio I really cannot see him top unless Aventurine power bottoms why but he's so "diligent" in all aspects but I see him being a pillow princess in bed

I also feel a little bad that I wasn't able to write more bickering between the two of them but I also feel like the normally talkative Dr Ratio keeps HIGH HIGH walls around Aventurine because it's hard to tell what this guy is thinking so he's thinking so hard trying to make sense of it all and he says little as not to give away anything that might be wrong

I feel like adding "all is fair in love and war" in Latin omina iusta sunt amore belloque was a little gratuitous but I also want to subtly sprinkle in that Aventurine is so obsessed with Ratio, so down bad for him, that he reads stuff about Dr Ratio a lot enough to come across a translation of the quote and I'm like no yeah way Ratio can deal with crazy-eyed Aventurine saying/declaring love while he's still computing the electric exchange they had so he's definitely like picking up on Aventurine's obsession/infatuation with him and he's like NOPE DON'T SAY IT and would rather kiss him to shut him up than hear it lmao

I honestly despaired at how I was going to start closing the scenes because it was like nighttime and I wanted to finish it already because they're killing me, so like, making Ratio fall asleep while Aventurine pours his heart out (I asked a friend who read it what he thought Aventurine said and they got it spot on so I figure it was conveyed properly on my end and I was really proud of this bit) seemed like a cute way to do it. The narration lied, Dr Ratio heard it but he got selective hearing and totally did NOT want to reply/acknowledge it. Poor Aventurine, but it's not as if he won't try again

I have waaay more ideas about them and I wonder if I can hold off until Aventurine releases or we get more crumbs idk but I want to write some kuudere Ratio (with a bit of tsun hehe)

Special mentions other than the lightcone art that fueled me: this art from Twitter that and this post that kinda made me think long and hard...

[cinnamoncarrds]

thessw guys are quite literally me (also ikm just now discovering more things about Tumblr in which I personally find unfair cause like why are some people able to post 20 pictures but I can only post 10... do I have to pay to do that☹️💔) i am mostly like eddy though I don't scam that much when I want to though and when I want to pull my friends into it they say no because they don't wanna be mean to kids with me which kinda makes me sad but. but I understand a tiny tiny bit and sometimes I have to aftually restrain myself from scamming a friend because when I see a friend have something interesting i become greedy and start wanting to scam them out of their whatever they have also im like him due to how kinda similar I act like him in real life 🦠I'm also like edd too but I'm not a germaphobe like I act similar to him in real life too though I'm. not not as vocal as he is☹️ it's just how he acts worried and stuff and how he likes personal space and how he acts wiyh his friends and stuff I'm realizing that this is like not as explained for edd uh. sorry 😞 edd kind of annoys me though which im sorry he's silly too it's just sometimes he kind of annoys me and makes me want to tell him to shut up and go back to his bubble where he can be alone and read or whatever he does (I like him though I like all the characters) also something I kinda wanna know is why? wwwwhhhhhyyyyyy did Eddy look more cuter as a baby (← toddler) than the others who looked ugly as (for ed →) babies/toddlers (← for edd)

maybe he was just the normalest baby known.. and grew up to be a tiny silly little scammer..... also this question might be stupid but I wann' know how the characters are quite literally able to get hurt and end up looking like a piece of gum chewed up and shit and then get up and start cleaning dust off then as if they did not just look. intensely hurt? also kinda wonder how theyre able to eat things they normally aren't able to eat. (im looking at you ed) ALSO. WHY THE HELL ARE THE JAWBREAKERS HUGE?? AND HOW ARE THEY NOT CHOKING ON THEM and also why are the eds bald I hope they grow hair :( maybe it's genetics and they probably won't grow hair unless they wear wigs but then that wouldn't make sense for Sarah cause she has hair and shes related to ed?? so like why are only the boys bald with very tiny pieces of hair and the girls in their family full headed with hair what is up with that thats weird genetics if you ask me

[llostwriter]

The Husky And The White Cat Shizun With their Baobei | 2HA Fanfic

Chapter 1

 To be awakened in a body that was not your own, with limited access to power within the spiritual core, was truly a bizarre situation. The first day in the body got you already missing the technologies of the modern era; you were unsure how you'd even survive. The location was also crucial; after all, if it was in the middle of nowhere, chances are you'd likely die. Well, the first thing you realized was that you were in the middle of the forest next to a field of herbs. Your clothing was some common white robes, inner and outer.

There were times where you almost ended up dying, but thankfully your current body's agility and speed were quite decent. Allowing you to quickly move away from the approaching wolves that were hoping to have you as their dinner.

What’s up with your fate with wolves? You were not sure.

You followed routes that looked strangely familiar to you, and you ended up coming across a village and meeting a kind old woman who appeared to know you. Only then did you realize that your current body name has the same name as you, Y/N. That woman allowed you to tidy yourself up in her home, which you were grateful for. Only by looking in the mirror did you realize that your current body shared similar facial features and the same eye colors. The current body of yours has longer hair than your previous self. It was a female body with boobs. You also found out you're the granddaughter of Ying Qin, the old lady who called you 孙女. You were thankful for learning Chinese during your previous life, or else you were sure that you would act like a fool in the village and be unable to communicate properly with the rest of the villagers.

Being a woman in your current body was not the best thing, especially during the ancient times of China. There were times you saw the villagers forcefully marrying off their daughters to rich merchants in return for a bag of golden tael. There was nothing you could do about it, since you can’t even save your current situation. But you do feel bad for the daughters who got sold off.

It did take awhile for you to get accustomed to the lack of modern technologies, since in modern times, when it comes to any problems, it's easier for you to just look them up. You have to lie to Ying Qin and say that you bumped your head during your time collecting herbs, resulting in some memory loss. Thankfully, Ying Qin quickly believed you, even though it does sound too convenient. It was the fourth month when you heard from the villagers about a group of Sisheng Peak cultivators coming to help with the agricultural development of that month. Sisheng Peak rang a memory in your mind; you remembered reading a novel about Mo Ran and Chu Wanning. Sisheng Peak was where Mo Ran and Chu Wanning lived. But you were unsure if the timeline was after or before Mo Ran's identity as the son of Xue Duanrong.

From then on, you had one goal, which was to become a cultivator and get accepted as one of the disciples of Chu Wanning. Only then could you finally be close to your favorite idol. Yes, you would be quite a simp for Chu Wanning; who wouldn't be? The problem is that you would need a real cultivation book instead of those fake ones that scammers would sell. Almost as if fate answered your call, one of the Sisheng Peak cultivators accidentally dropped their cultivation-learning material during their visit without realizing it. You were unsure why they would even bring it when they're supposed to be helping to grow the crops of the village, but it's none of your business.

With the acquired material, you were finally able to learn the route of cultivation. Awakening your spiritual core was a hard task; for more than 3 years, there was hardly any process. You weren't sure if that was supposed to be normal or not. When you were almost ready to give up, suddenly you were able to sense your spiritual essence. Surprisedly, it was more than one, but you were unsure how many spiritual essences there were; it all felt mixed up. But regardless, you were happy to hear that you finally achieved the first step to cultivating. You wasted almost no time packing up and leaving the village to a location closer to Sisheng Peak.

Times that you wished that there was a system that could guide you, like the ones in novels. But you weren’t as lucky as the characters, as there were no systems.

After leaving your hometown to earn a living, you resorted to collecting herbs and battling weaker spirits. During your travels, you stumbled upon a special herb that could transform you into the opposite gender. However, upon contact, you experienced a sharp, almost unbearable burning sensation throughout your body. You hurried to a nearby river to cool off, assuming you had encountered some poisonous plants. Although the river provided relief, the next morning you discovered that your body had transformed, forcing you to buy male clothing to accommodate the change.

The next day that you went to the field, that plant was gone.

The effects never wear off.

—-

You were preparing for the new disciple-selecting ceremony; you have to think of a way for Chu Wanning to be willing to choose you as his disciple. Since you remembered that Chu Wanning doesn't blindly choose his disciples, Like Shi Mei, it was because of their kind and gentle nature. And you weren't the son or daughter of a sect leader like Xue Meng. There was almost nothing special about you. Your swordsmanship seems rigid and doesn't feel right after all; you don't have proper training, and some mere books weren't enough. Your cultivation is still on a basic basis, even though you can sense the mixture of different spiritual essences within you.

Perhaps picking a flower and handing it to Chu Wanning could boost your chances.

After all, you remembered reading a part about how hardly any disciples approach Chu Wanning due to statements about his coldness and harsh personality. Perhaps that was the reason why Chu Wanning hardly has any disciples, compared to the rest of the other sets of Shizun, who have hundreds of disciples.

You did it, and it succeeded. Strangely, since it shouldn’t have been that easy, but who were you to not accept the kindness that the universe gives you? All it matters is that Chu Wanning has taken you as one of his disciples.

You met Xue Meng and Shi Mei; however, Mo Ran was nowhere to be found. You guess that the timeline was before the main plot line started. You naively thought that everything was going to be alright, since it's probably the second timeline and not the previous one. You were horribly wrong. Shi Mei ended up pretending to die, and it completely fooled Mo Ran. Mo Ran wouldn't try to even listen to your explanation on how Shi Mei wasn't actually dead, resulting in a huge argument that tore both of your close relationships apart. Chu Wanning also blamed himself for the 'death' of Shi Mei. You tried to explain that Shi Mei wasn't dead, but Chu Wanning only assumed that you were trying to comfort him with lies. Nothing changed from the original plotline, even with your existence.

Mo Ran becomes Taxian-Jun, the emperor of the cultivation realm, marrying the most beautiful woman. Taking Chu Wanning as his concubine.

You attempted to run away with Chu Wanning but were caught by minions of Taxian-Jun and later Taxian-Jun. You still remember the terrifying glare that Taxian-jun gave you; it sends shivers down your spine. Taxian-jun dragged Chu Wanning back after coldly warning you that he wouldn't hesitate to kill you as well if you interrupted his plan. Even despite that, you were still determined to help Chu Wanning escape the grasp of Taxian- Jun.. During your stay at Sisheng Peak, you finally found a method of changing back to your original form, which was female, but you decided to stay as a male. Your plan was to sneak in as a female maid into the palace and sneak Chu Wanning out. Chu Wanning was surprised to see you in your original form; however, you knew that you didn't have much time to explain. But during both of your escapes, you died. You were unsure how you died. Did Taxian-Jun kill you? You only remembered bleeding out and dying, with Chu Wanning attempting to stop the bleeding but failing miserably due to the limitation of his cultivation.

—- Next Try?

—-

[chosonore]

summary: scaramouche would never share his turnip commission fees with anybody, let alone let anybody touch his island but for you he would make an exception. hell, if you'd only asked, he would give you the world and all the stars because he loved you so. companion piece to this drabble

a/n: i return with a very self-indulgent piece because i love and miss scaramouche and life is not daijoubu right now and i was thinking of it while playing animal crossing. i hope you enjoy!

"you're taking such a hefty fee for turnip sales on your island?" you questioned with a frown, peeking over his shoulder to look at the screen. "isn't that like… i don't know, exploitative? i wouldn't go through the hassle of going to your island, only to be robbed half of my earnings-"

"are you calling me a scammer?" scaramouche interrupted you, narrowing his eyes at you. "i'm just making profit, people choose to come here knowing that. not my fault if you're too stupid to read."

when you'd first gotten yourself a copy of animal crossing, your boyfriend had haughtily exclaimed he would never even touch the game. deeming it as a waste of time and a "stupid little" game, he'd only watched you while you played - that was until you started to bicker about the state of your island. competitive and determined to make his island infinitely better than yours, scaramouche picked up another copy for himself. and so, you'd found yourself snuggling to his side every night as you sat in bed and played together. in a way, it was a nice and soothing routine. it felt comforting to be able to share this passion of yours with him, knowing that animal crossing was not his type of game. and though he might have started playing for a rather petty reason, a part of you knew that it was his pride that wouldn't let him admit that he wanted to do this with and for you. still, you appreciated it.

"the s in scaramouche stands for scammer, baby," you snickered and giggled upon seeing his glare as he nudged your side. "honestly, who would even fall for this? you'll earn the money either way so there's no rush."

"childe did."

"he what?"

"he didn't even blink. he might be annoying but he knows how to make deals, i've got to give him that," scaramouche shrugged, smirking at your shocked face. you wanted to wipe the smugness off his face - why did he always have to have the last word? you've always liked his tenacity and sheer determination, traits that were so prominent and strong that they were akin to a double-edged sword. traits that got the best of him when you got in heated arguments as he was never one to back down, too prideful and stubborn to admit his wrongdoings out loud. despite this, you could tell that scaramouche often swallowed his pride for you. he tried and adjusted to you and that was enough for you.

scaramouche saved and closed the game before turning off the console, placing it on his bedside table. pulling you closer to him, he wrapped his arms around your waist and laid his head on your stomach. he blinked at your screen, watching as you collected wood from your island. "said something about wanting to get that crown for zhongli. that ridiculously expensive one from the store? don't see the point in it, it's ugly."

you rolled your eyes. no matter what childe did, scaramouche would always have some kind of snarky comment ready. you didn't understand their friendly rivalry, it was childish and petty at times but never malicious. in his own weird way, he cared about the younger male. "childe has enough money to do whatever he wants, if he wants to gift zhongli that crown instead of paying off the loan then good for him. you have the money but you're stingy like mr crabs and that's why you're scamming people out of their turnip earnings."

scaramouche grumbled. "why would you even want that crown? it's a useless item, i could give you something far more useful," he retorted with a snide tone, burying his face in the fabric of your, or rather his, sweater. in times like these, he reminded you of a disgruntled kitten throwing a fit. 

"and what would that be?" you asked teasingly, knowing that he didn't have a reply. another annoyed huff confirmed your hunch, making you smile. subconsciously, your hand found its way to his hair, gently combing through the purple strands. he moved closer, arms tightening around you ever so slightly as if he was a dragon guarding its stash of precious gems. the silence remained for a while, though not uncomfortable. it was never awkward with him, both of you having worked hard on communication to make the relationship work as he was rather curt and to-the-point while you held back more and could be passive aggressive. through the cracks of a hardened and cold fassade, there was a warm-hearted person yearning for the feelings of love and home that they always missed growing up. and you hoped that you could provide him at least a semblance of the comfort he was seeking.

muffled by the sweater, you couldn't hear what your boyfriend was mumbling when he finally spoke up. you made a confused noise, halting in your movements. disgruntled, scaramouche leaned back. he glared at you and you couldn't help but crack a smile - he looked ridiculous with the messed up hear and the indents on his face from smushing his face in the sweater. "you know i'd give you the world if you just asked, right? just say it and it's yours. doesn't matter what it is, i'll find a way," scaramouche's face turned serious, hands grasping yours as he intertwined your fingers. 

"i know," you reassured him, squeezing his hands. "and i appreciate it. but you don't have to go that far for me, i just want to have you here, with me. by my side."

"mhmm. bold of you to assume i'd let you leave my side to begin with," he muttered under his breath. "you're mine and i'm yours, hm?"

"always."

"i'll get you that stupid crown if you want it," scaramouche scowled again as he saw childe's name appearing on the screen, annoyed at the thought of the cursed item. meaningful, my ass. childe just wanted to show off like he always did, he was sure of it. but as you tried to come up with a remark, you followed his gaze. your words died in your throat as you watched him eye your fingers. "i'll get you something better, something that you can actually show off in real life." 

scaramouche leaned his head against yours, briefly pecking your lips. your heart swelled at the thought, just knowing that he felt the same way about you made you feel all kinds of warm. it was the warmth that only he could provide you, one that was was inconspicuous but still felt. like a low, simmering heat that always accompanied you but was never overbearing - it always reminded you of its existence, of its gentle and warming strength just for you. one that could also turn into a sweltering fire if he let it, but it was never directed at you. its purpose was to protect you and there was nothing more that he wanted to do. when scaramouche said that he would give you the world, he meant it. hell, he would even let you delete his entire island if you wanted to.

"oh, is that a promise? i'm holding you to it. it better be something mind blowing, never seen before, showstopping and brilliant-"

"don't make me silence you."

"with your lips? aha you're so sexy, don't do that-"

"oh my god, i hate you," scaramouche groaned, moving to push you off of him. 

"liar, you love me," you laughed as you struggled against his grip, wiggling in his arms until you found your way to his side and snuggled into him.

he sighed, wrapping his arms around you. "i do, very much so. you deserve the world and all the stars."

[the-bjd-community-confess]

I'm writing this because I see a lot of people (who aren't actually waiting on orders and would have the right to be angry in that case) shitting on D0llshe and it really seems like no one understands how we got here in the first place. The problem isn't D0llshe not caring, if he didn't care, he wouldn't be TRYING to send out the dolls that are ordered, even if they're unstrung or he has to ask if he can change certain parts of orders to make them easier to complete. He'd just fucking leave without a word like we've seen makers do before (Lee-el, for instance).

What got D0llshe into this mess are the sales. He'd put dolls on such a huge discount that it likely just covered casting and shipping materials. These dolls aren't the cheapest things to make when you use a good quality resin, are constantly having to make new molds, and take your time when doing finishing work (sanding seams, adding magnets, stringing just right, etc). He probably wasn't making any actual profit or paying himself for the work he does on the dolls when the sales were up.

So, if that's the case, why would he do them as often as he did?

Simple; because that's when people actually bought his fucking work. How many times have we heard over the years (before shit finally came to a head and we are where we are now) "I want to order XYZ from D0llshe, but I'm hoping for a sale" or "I wasn't planning on ordering anything right now, but the D0llshe sale was too good!" and this common sentiment that if you wanted something from D0llshe, it was BEST to wait for the discounts?

Do you think he didn't notice? Of course he did. And when shit started to get bad and he kept saying that the next sale would be the last, orders would pour in, and then they'd be slow again. So, he'd hold another final sale, orders would pour in, then get slow afterwards. Rinse and Repeat. He did it cause he saw the pattern. And he's a person that has shit to pay for in his everyday life just like the rest of us. So, yeah, he probably took the casting and shipping material costs of some of the dolls he sold at massive discounts to put towards shit like groceries and gas money and bills. He didn't leave himself any choice.

He shouldn't have been selling those dolls like that and that's ultimately on him as the business owner. But, as consumers, our money talks. Just as much as the makers in this hobby influence us with their creations, by putting our money where our interests lie, we influence them back. Mr. D0llshe should have been more transparent about everything, but like I've seen said here ad nauseum lately, people should have been willing to buy his stuff new at full price. The sales weren't sustainable in the slightest and that's obvious now.

D0llshe isn't a scammer, he's a creative person that makes beautiful dolls and poor business decisions. He didn't want to be in the position he's in, no one would be, unless they intended to just peace out of the hobby but he clearly isn't trying to do that. Its a shitty situation for everyone and I hope that everyone with outstanding orders get the dolls they're waiting on or a refund when Mr. D0llshe is able to, but that's probably going to take a while. And I sincerely hope that D0llshe doesn't fold after all is said and done. I think that if he learns from this, and stops with the unsustainable discounts, he could come back and build his reputation back up to what it once was.

Only time will tell at this point, though, just wanted to get this out of my system.

~Anonymous

[itsthestutterforme]

Firecracker 3/? (Dark!Ari Levinson)

Summary: Your friend dragged you out of the house for a girls night out until Y/F/N came across a scammer getting beaten up by some men in the mob. You knew that it wasn't any of your business but Y/F/N insisted on helping him and now you're in big trouble.

Notes: GIF is not mine, mentions of assassination, mentions of child abuse, insinuations of sexual assault, mentions of child death

--

Ari and you walk down the street towards the city park while you were holding hands. And for a moment, you felt like a normal couple. You reach over and fondle with the gold chain of your name was plastered on his collarbone. If he can tattoo his name on your thighs, he sure as hell can have your name on his gold chain.

You were on your way back from eating dinner and Ari didn't feel like going home just yet. "You like it?" "At least it wasn't as painful as this," you snark, smoothing a hand over your thighs. "Oh please, you know you love it." You roll your eyes and a guy bumps into you as he walked by.

"Are fucking serious? Apologize to her right now or I'll gouge your eyes out." Ari snaps, pulling away from your hand. You turn around to face the guy too and that's when your blood ran cold in your veins.

The thinning, greasy hair with wrinkles and moles litering his face. The black polo and jeans. And the disgusting musk of aged cheese.

"So this is who you're with now?" He asks. Heat creeps up the back of your neck and settled in your cheeks. "You son of a bitch. You have no fucking right to talk to me or my company."

"You run a company now? Hm, thought the only thing you were good for was laying on your back." He says.

"That's it," Ari made his way towards him and you pulled him back by his arm. "Don't," "Why not? He's just a useless waste of space," "This piece of shit is my father, and killing him would be a mercy." You say. "We're leaving," you add before turning your back on him. "Have you visited Y/B/N recently?" He asked.

You spun around and without a second thought, your fist came into contact with his jaw. Your lips twitched when you felt a crack beneath your fist. "Don't you dare say his name, you fucking murderer." You grit your teeth as you watch him fall to the floor.

You stand over him and saw your dying brother replaying in your mind. You grab your father's collar and wind your arm all the way back to punch each time. Your knuckles grew slick from his blood and your shoulder muscles were sore from the force of your punches.

"Y/N, stop. You'll kill him." Ari says, pulling you off him. You lunged forward and nearly knocked Ari off balanced. Wow, she's really worked up. Ari thinks to himself.

He huffed before picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder. "Vaughn, I need you to pull up to 22nd Street now. Y/N is having a fit. She just beat her father to a pulp." Ari explains.

"God, okay. I'm coming around the corner right now." The tires screeched as the car came around the corner and Ari tossed you in before hopping in the passenger seat.

"Headed home boss?" "Yeah," "What the hell was that? You were going to kill your own father," Ari scolds. "I don't expect you to understand, Ari."

"Then help me understand because if people catch wind about it then it could be bad for business." "What? And it wouldn't be bad for business if you would have socked him?" You snark. "Socking him and beating him to a pulp are two very different things."

"I'm done talking," you say, looking out the window. "The fuck you mean you're done talking? You're done when I say you're done! This is not a cute rebellious act, Y/N." Ari yells and Vaughn speaks up. "Boss, she probably doesn't want to talk with me in here. Just give her some time to diffuse." He explains.

"You're right, you're right. I've just never seen her act like that before." Ari whispers to Vaughn. The entire ride home was silent and Ari would occasionally look at you but your gaze never left the window. As soon as Vaughn pulled into your driveway, you rush out of the car and right into the house.

Ari was hot on your heels and you knelt down for your six month old puppy, Atlanta, to run into your arms. She rests her head on your shoulder and you take a deep breath. Some tears escape your eyes and Ari smooths a hand over your back.

"I'm sorry that I yelled at you, firecracker." He apologizes and you pulled away from Atlanta before standing. "I don't know what I was thinking. I was so stupid than to think that I could being your wife and somehow forget where I came from." You wipe away a few tears and Ari tries to comfort you.

"Don't," "What do you want me to do?" "I don't know, but I just need some space to think." "Come on, Atlanta." You add before walking upstairs to go to the balcony.

You finally left the balcony after you think Ari is asleep. But little did you know that Ari was wide awake in the living room scrolling through the news articles about your assault from earlier. The news sources don't know who it is because the video footage was barely legible. Good.

His attention is peaked when he hears glasses clanking. He looks over the top of the couch to see you pouring a glass of whiskey. "Okay," he says before walking into the kitchen. You down the whole drink in two gulps and move to pour more when Ari places a hand on your to stop you.

"Come on, baby. Just talk to me." He whispers, kissing your shoulder. "I'll break down if I do." You whisper back. "Then I promise to piece you back together. I'm your husband after all. It may have started out rough, but it's real to me." He explains.

You sigh and rest your arms on the counter as you bow your head in shame. Ari turns you around and lifts your chin to meet his gaze. "Ari.." you trail off when he kisses all of your face, making sure to linger on your forehead and chin.

"I love you no matter what you tell me, alright. You're perfect for me." He cups your cheeks and you sobbed softly into his chest.

He settles a hand in your hair and you wrapped your arms around him. "When I was younger.. I had a younger brother. It was just me and him against my parents. My dad would do things to me when no one else was in the house and.. my mother knew a-about it but chose not to do anything." You lifted your head away from his chest and smoothed your hands over his toned chest.

"My brother knew about it and he decided to take matters into his own hands. He tried to pull my father away from me and h-he shoved him. Oh God, I can't do this. I'm sorry." You tried to get away from him but he lifts you on the counter and pulled your face into his neck.

"Say the word, and he'll be six feet under." He says after a few moments of silence. "Like I said, killing him would be a mercy." "I could make it messy, brutal." You shake your head no and gasp when you notice your bloody knuckles.

"Oh God, what if they find out I did it?" "They didn't. The video footage was fuzzy beyond recognition. But if they find anything else, I'll handle it." "Ari, I--" "Stop blaming yourself. Your emotions are valid. Now, let's get this this blood off huh?"

**

You were in the middle of typing up a report when you were sent an email from an unknown user with the heading "YOU'LL BE JOINING HER SOON".

You were taught never to open any emails from anyone unknown as it could be a virus sent to invade and infiltrate sensitive information about GB from your computer.

So you decided to click out and log out of everything before going incognitio mode on your computer so your databases were under lock down from you and anybody else.

Her, they must be talking about Y/F/N. If something happened to her, you don't know what you'll do with yourself.

Your finger hovers over the mouse to click on the email and your hand started to shake. You close your eyes momentarily and you clicked on the email.

A shriek leaves your lips when your eyes settle on Y/F/N on the floor of a house with bullet holes litering her face and body. You stand up from your chair and Vaughn comes bursting into the room with her gun in his hands.

He scans the room before asking, "What happened?" You turn your face away from the gruesome images and faced the wall.

Vaughn rounds the table and tucks his gun into his holster. "My God," he says to himself. He closes the computer and gently touches your shoulder to hug when.

You wince at his touch and said, "Don't touch me. All of this wouldn't have happened if you didn't take me away from her! Protecting her is my responsibility!"

You turn around to face him with mascara running down your cheeks. "Y/N, I'm sorry. We thought she would be safe with-" "I don't care what your excuses are. I'm going home." You push passed him and grab your purse before leaving the room.

Vaughn follows you and takes your keys from your purse. "I'm driving," you scoff and jump into the car while he wiggled into the drivers seat. He spends some time using the mechanical button to extend the seat far enough for his legs to fit.

Any other day and you both would be laughing but this is not any other day. You got an incoming call from Ari and silenced your phone.

Vaughn pulled into your driveway and Ari opens the door to greet you. You push passed him and Vaughn quietly explained to him what you were emailed.

Ari wipes a hand over his face and sighed. "It had the Beauchamps written all over it, boss. But she blames us for getting Y/F/N involved with the mob in the first place." Vaughn explains. "How is she holding u-" Ari was cut off by your yells and glass shattering.

You were holding back your emotions the entire ride home and you just had to let it go. You grabbed the nearest painting and tossed it against the wall.

Ari and Vaughn burst into the room with their guns cocked. Their eyes widened as they watched you toss the heavy bed frame on its side and scatter the papers and paperweight along the floor.

"No!" You shriek and grab more paintings from the walls before shattering them against the desk. You punched through the vanity mirror and started to punch the wall with all your strength. That's when Ari and Vaughn exchanged a look before advancing towards you.

Your wrist bent the wrong way and snapped your right forearm. You yelp out, not fully feeling the pain yet because of the adrenaline coursing through your veins.

Ari holds you from behind and presses your arms to your chest, careful not to apply too much pressure. "No, let me go! You got her killed! You killed her." You croak, but the anger started to fade into sadness.

Your body goes limp against his. "Boss, I think her arm is broken. She has to go to the hospital." Vaughn says, gently taking your arm that was bent at an odd angle. "Oh God, okay. Get the car ready." Vaughn leaves the room and Ari lifts you into his arm effortlessly.

"This is all your fault," "I know, I'm sorry." You spent hours in the hospital between the x rays and waiting for the doctor to come in and put your arm in a cast. To say the entire process was painful was an understatement. It was nighttime by the time you came home from the hospital with Ari and Vaughn.

You walk up the stairs and locked yourself in one of the guest rooms. You were about to climb into bed with you heard Atlanta whining and scratching at the door.

You huff and open the door wide enough for her to come through. "Y/N," Ari starts. "I don't want to talk about it," you say before locking the door again.

Atlanta sits on the edge of the bed and waits for you to lay down on the bed. You slide underneath the covers and hugs a pillow to your chest. Burying your face into the pillow, your aching body shook as you cried. Atlanta whines and lays her head ontop of your after she licks away your tears.

Ari sits down on the ground next to your door with his back against the wall. It physically pains him to hear you cry. Especially when he knows that it takes a lot of pain to take you there. You started to cry harder into the pillow and Atlanta sniffs and licks your cast.

Ari wraps his arms around his knees and tucked his head into his lap. He didn't stop the tears from leaving his eyes. You're right. None of this would have happened if he just left you alone. If Y/F/N didn't mind her business.

But he didn't want to take it all back. He couldn't. That would mean that he wouldn't have met you. You became his world in just a few days.

And the fact that he might lose you, scares the hell out of him. "Boss," Vaughn starts and Ari shakes his head. Not now. Ari says in his head. "I'll come by tomorrow morning then,"

The days started to blur together for you and Ari. He hasn't left your side since you locked yourself in the room. You spent the entire days sleeping. You barely had the energy to get up to go to the bathroom.

The next day, you started to spiral. You made Vaughn buy you some bottles of Royal Crown tequila. The tequila made matters worse to say the least. You said plenty that you didn't mean. After a week in bed, you finally get up in the morning to make coffee.

You walk passed Ari sleeping on the couch in his black sweatpants and white tank top. His hair covers his forehead and eyes and soft snores leave his parted lips. He has a newspaper in his hand and you gently take it from him.

Your heart breaks all over again when you see that he was looking at Y/F/N's obituary. It has the date and place of her funeral in bold letters on the very bottom.

You look back at Ari and sigh deeply. You knew that he feels guilty. He tried to keep quiet but you knew he was outside the door waiting for you to come out. And now he sleeps on the couch close by. You all had a part in Y/F/N's death. You shouldn't have pinned it on all him.

You round the couch and brush his hair away from his face to press a soft kiss to his lips. His eyes had dark circles under them. When he slowly peeled them open, you saw how sunken they look. You did that to him. "Y/N," he croaks. "I'm so sorry," you whimper.

"You didn't do anything wrong. "Don't do that. Don't make me out to be the saint here. I said and did terrible things. I-" "You were greiving," he pulls you into his lap and cupped your face as you shake your head no.

"I'm sorry," you lean forward and pressed kisses all over his face, lingering on his eyes. He sighs softly and said, "I was worried you would leave me,"

He buries his face into your neck. "I'm not going anywhere. Just lay down and go back to sleep." You say, pushing on his shoulders gently. He lays back down and you follow him to lay on his chest.

The arm with your cast rests off the side of the couch as you lay your head next to his. "The funeral is in two days," he says, breaking the silence.

"I know, I read the newspaper you had." "Did you want to go?" "I don't know if I can face them. They probably blame me for not being there to protect her," tears threaten your eyes. "I doubt they think that, baby. You're human, you can't be everywhere at once." His hand smooths over the back of your head.

"She saved my life, Ari." "And you saved hers," another silence fell over the living room and Atlanta jumps off the bed in your room to sit next to the couch. "Why didn't you leave when I said those things? Anybody else would have left?"

His boiling hot body flushed against yours as another silence fell. "Because I love you," he finally says.

[itslenagain]

Hang on, let's start at the beginning.

I'm a demon. It happened somewhere in between all the pyramid schemes and scamming old grandmas out of their life savings to score. I was made one hell of a deal to keep myself out of trouble, but in order to make it happen, I had to trade places with the demon who propositioned me. He got my meat suit and my human life, I got to be a powerful demon who could keep ripping people off with fewer consequences. Sounded like a great deal to me at first, so I signed on the dotted line, one might say.

You know the drill. Idiots, usually white men, came and asked me for something stupid in exchange for their soul. There was the usual stuff, like "I need money NOW" or "Make me famous" or "I need to live longer." I still think my favorite had to be the guy who wanted me to turn him into a house fly. Why? He was drunk and heard they have the largest sperm cell in the animal kingdom and he wanted to, and I quote, "blow a massive load." I probably wouldn't have done it if it wasn't so fucking funny. Of course you can't take the soul of someone who's too intoxicated to consent, but I did that one for free.

But it gets so old. These assholes are slimy. Their souls are endless black holes of shit. It's like going to the orchard and walking out with a bag of rotten fruit and nobody's around to throw it at. There's only maybe one decent soul in my coffer, and even that dude went and fucked it up. The truth is, nobody comes to a demon with 100% pure intentions. There's always some ulterior motive that is so completely and utterly predictable, even if they're asking for something "good." This one wants to use the money to start a charity! Oh, but he ends up taking 50% of the donations for himself. This one wants her son to be successful! Yeah, but she emotionally and financially abuses him for the rest of her shitty life. This one wants to cure his wife's cancer! Yeah, but he's been shagging the neighbor for years and only does it to hold it over the poor woman's head. Maybe sometimes it felt.... nice? To know you'd own these fuckers and they'd soon be forced to stop their trails of destruction. But damn, their souls feel less like a gold medal and more like a sad participation certificate. I was a damn good scammer in my human days. Now I feel like one of those Nigerian Prince email scams that everyone with a functional brain stem ignores.

So I rolled my eyes when Dylan summoned me from my corner of Hell to ask for a big house with enough land for a farm. Dylan was an odd one, definitely not one of my usuals. They had a stupid hipster haircut and dressed like they were having tea with the frog prince later on. I was incredibly amused. What were their plans? Becoming a plantation owner and ripping off underprivileged laborers? Experimenting with pesticides to make super crops and lots of money while slowly poisoning the shit out of the Earth and its humans? Beastiality? The possibilities were endless. I'd gotten good at not asking why. I never liked the answers and I knew nobody ever *really* told me the whole truth anyways. So I didn't ask. I told them where to sign, made damn sure they dotted all their I's and crossed all their T's. I gave them the obligatory speel about how by signing this contract, they were giving me the ownership of their immortal soul to torture and generally violate in any way I see fit upon the agreed due date. They seemed more than happy to sign. Definitely a bizarre one. They confused me further when, upon signing, they said, "Well, everyone says I'm going to Hell anyways, might as well do it on my own terms."

So Dylan and I agreed that they would pay their debt of a human soul to me in 5 years time. I always liked to see how my deals played out, so I tended to give longer pay-by dates than some of my fellow demons. A good number ended up paying early anyways. I watched from afar to see what kind of unholy bullshit Dylan would commit now that they had sold their soul to me.

It was incredibly peculiar when Dylan, at first, started out by working the farm by themself. Carefully seeding the land, dutifully tending to the delicate sprouts, feeding and brushing and petting the cows and chickens. Aahh, the long game. The fuckery was coming, I thought. What actually came? A much different kind of fuckery than my wildest dreams could have imagined.

Suddenly, Dylan began bringing people into the house. They jokingly referred to this as "taking in strays." I waited for them to start abusing the people, forcing them to work for pennies, or holding the threat of losing their homes over their heads if they didn't submit to Dylan's weird fetishes or something. I waited and waited. It didn't happen.

Dylan brought in people in ragged clothes, people with no money, sometimes even a sad teenager whose family said they couldn't come home. Dylan showed every one of them so much care. They cooked for these people, made sure they had clean, well-fitting clothes, taught them some skills if they seemed interested. There was one woman who shook and screamed for hours while going through withdrawal from whatever cocktail of street drugs she chose to poison herself with, and Dylan held her hand and put cool cloths on her forehead for days until she started to improve. It was... fascinating. Dylan didn't expect anything from the strays they took under their roof. They genuinely just wanted these misfit humans to feel loved.

I just kept waiting. "There has to be some trick," I kept telling myself. "There's no way." The more I waited and waited for that trick to come, the more Dylan just kept proving their intentions were pure. I was astonished.

Eight months into this wild experiment, I was amazed to see Dylan cry and hug the first man who came to live in the house. He'd been living on the streets for 6 years. Dylan had helped him apply for housing, and he had been working at his first steady job in years for over 3 months now. Dylan never charged him rent, never forced him to work on the farm, never tried to abuse him in any way. I couldn't wrap my head around it. What was the catch? Why would they do something so kind for a complete stranger? I was still waiting for the trick. The master plan. They couldn't keep it up like this forever.

But it just kept going. Dylan had opened a farmer's market that offered affordable fresh produce and honey and eggs and milk and sometimes meat. It started slow in the beginning, but soon many people flocked to their market to purchase their goods. Some of the money went to buying supplies and paying bills for the house and its residents. I watched in pure confusion with what Dylan did with the profits when they started rolling on in. Dylan made large anonymous donations to mutual aid funds. Dylan established an interest-bearing savings account where they kept aside a small amount to grow into housing funds. At first, it was only for their residents, helping them find stable homes when they were ready to move on. But then, it expanded. People in the community came to the farm stand with papers and bills. Dylan paid them. No expectations, no requirement of paying a penny back. But many people did anyways, even if it took a while. Dylan opened a summer program for kids to come work on the farm and learn how to live sustainably, free of charge, so parents who couldn't afford or find childcare could find work or go to appointments or even just take a rest day. Without Dylan asking, people came and helped.

It was... beautiful. Dylan brought so much to their community. The farm project essentially eliminated homelessness in their small town, and spread to neighboring communities. They never treated themself to any money they didn't earn, and they kept their earnings intentionally low. They gave people with no house a home, people with no kin a family, people with no hope a future. They never turned away anyone seeking help. They never expected anything in return.

And so when 4 years had passed and Dylan knew their time was coming, they created a plan that would outlive them to ensure the farm would remain available to any who needed it and would not be abused. That first resident? He had become a completely changed man, and sobbed wildly when Dylan asked if he would be willing to inherit the farm and honor his wish of keeping it a safe, loving home and community for anyone in need. They laid out clear contracts, established trusts and bank accounts and the like, to make sure they could keep on helping people from beyond the mortal realm.

When Dylan's time was up, they did not fight. They did not plead. I finally asked, "why did you do it?"

They simply replied, "I did not have a safe home or food on the table or clothes on my back in my youth. All I really wanted was for someone to believe in me when nobody else did. So when I found a way to do that for other people, I had to. My wish, my dream, is that people keep benefitting from the farm for decades. I hope it will keep loving on people who need that love. And I get to die knowing I devoted the last 5 years of my life to bettering my world."

I hadn't felt like crying in decades. I wanted to cry. This soul was pure. It was a shining, brilliant beacon that didn't deserve centuries of torture and punishment. Maybe there was a small amount of selfish desire in their request, but they took 347 people and completely changed their entire lives in 5 years, with no expectation of applause or repayment. It felt wrong to put Dylan in a bag of rotten fruit. Dylan was perfectly ripe durian that should be appreciated.

So despite the pain it took to climb up to Heaven's gate, I did it, for Dylan. For the one truly pure soul I'd ever encountered. The angels were confused to see me, and even more confused when I said Dylan needed to be granted entry.

"The contract is clear. There is no loophole here. You own this person's soul." The angel eyed me with extreme suspicion. I understood why. Demons aren't known for our honesty.

"I know. And I'm telling you, I'm not leaving with it. This person saved lives. They changed their entire community with the farm I gave them. They were entirely selfless. I can't torture them. I might be a demon, but damn, I know a pure soul when I see one." The angels seem to see your point, looking at Dylan's perfectly iridescent soul.

"I'm still not sure what you're getting out of doing this," the angel steadily replied. "I've never known a demon to do something without an ulterior motive."

"....maybe I don't really 100% know what I get out of this, either, but I know what they will get out of it, and I'm not leaving until you tell me you will take them." I could feel the second layer of the dermis on my meat suit beginning to burn. Demons weren't supposed to come to Heaven. It disintegrates us. I didn't care. I would stand here and burn for Dylan. How could I not?

The angel sighs. "Well, you sure are a stubborn one." The angel pulls some dusty book out from its robe. "I'll tell you what. This is the list of souls that could have gone to Heaven if they had not been sold-"

"You have a list for that?!?!"

"The big man likes lists, OK?! Anyways, if this person's name is on the list, I'll take their soul." I held my breath as the angel flipped through pages of this dusty old book. Black blood started to run down my arms and legs. I closed my eyes. Then, I heard the pages stop turning.

"Dylan Ranidae?"

"....of fucking course that's their last name."

The angel chuckles. "Yeah, it says they're one of the good ones. A deal is a deal, so I'll take them." I crack one eye open to watch as the angel guides the shining soul across the threshold. The angel looks back at me, briefly. "Nice to know there are some decent ones left," and disappears into the clouds. My mission accomplished, I jumped off the landing and descended back into Hell. "What a weirdo," I think, not sure who exactly I'm referring to.

“This person sold their soul to you fair and square,” said the incredulous angel to the demon. “Why are you petitioning for them to enter heaven?” “Because after everything they did with what I gave them, they deserve to.”

[tears-of-boredom]

It's just wild how I grew up in a subtly racist community. I'm like just now realising how racist some things were. I literally thought that the finnish n-word, was another word for a chimney sweeper. I thought that until like 2 years ago. And I used to literally play this "children's rhyme" game with my grandmother what was straight up just making fun of like, chinese and japanese people for having different looking eyes. I still remember that rhyme. Also after the fact it kinda surprised me that my grandmother was the one doing the racism, becayse I haven't heard really anything bigoted from her in a while, despite my sister being a prime object of a lot of bigotry. A third thing is that, I'm not sure who, but some adult, maybe my mom, "warned" me about these women with these big skirts who frequently sold rugs near this store close by. And I kind of learned to think of them as cheap, scammers, and I learned to avoid them as much as possible. I mean, they weren't white so that's all the more reason to not trust them, right? And the thing is like, I know for a fact that I wouldn't have thought them to be scamming people, if no one told me so. There's nothing that would've indicated that to me. But because someone, who I unfortunately don't remember, said something like that in passing, I have this weird fucking reaction to anyone with one of those skirts who walks nearby me. I'm pretty sure I also in my head called them a slur. Hold on I'm gonna google this..., Yeah so, the slur I remember using, is used towards romani people, which those people with the big skirts may or may have been. Most likely they were. Yeah, that's just awful and shitty. And the wikipedia article says about the slur: "nowadays is often seen as derogatory"("nykyään pidetään usein halventavana.") There's nothing inherently wrong with those words, but it just seems like it's trying its hardest to say "yeah NOWADAYS, SOME people, SAY it's offensive" like they're trying to make it an opinion thing.

Anyways, this is why I will never say I like finland. Racism is just too tightly a part of the modern culture. It's literally considered the funniest joke to just, say the n-word.

I still kind of want to try wearing one of those big skirts, they look pretty cool.

[lightdancer1]

Death and the Firebender, A Sandman/Avatar crossover

Chapter I:

Azula had lived a life of danger and strangeness, she reflected with all the exhausted unoriginality typical of someone in from a long day at work. In her childhood she had been a soldier. No...more than a soldier. A general who acted like a glorified lieutenant and had even briefly killed the Avatar. Now she spent her life in a blend of occasional combat, at the side of her old enemies (a thought that never ceased to bemuse her). And......mostly she spent time delving into a blend of spiritual and scientific matters.

It was a thought of great amusement to her that the people she met from Ba Sing Se had very different views of her depending on status. The Inner and Middle Rings were either very welcoming or indifferent. Upper Ring people were indifferent to outright hostile but seldom willing to gamble on her family's dubious kindness to her. She was, admittedly, more grateful for that than she had any particular reason to expect, but......

Most people who consulted her for various technical issues just saw the person who'd helped to revolutionize entire industries, replacing overachievement in war and imperialism with inventing new kinds of machines and making that invention stick. All things considered she preferred the life of Princess Azula, technical support and occasional spirit mentor to her older life.

She'd found a way to co-exist with her mother, a younger sister she liked. Her uncle, even, had found a means to actually view her as human instead of fearing any given mistake was a prelude to overthrowing her brother. It had been a strange path to that with Ursa, but it had worked...somehow. And she wasn't entirely insistent on delving too deeply into that. She'd learned from some of the surreal yet reality-based adventures with the Avatar that her unique brand of fire had some similarities to that of her ancestor Rina.

Power with spirits. These were not the thoughts that roiled through her head when a figure who outwardly looked like a surprisingly short woman with messy black hair and skin the color of bone stepped into her business. She wore Fire Nation style clothing, save a bright silver object vaguely cruciform in shape save that it was topped by a circle.

Azula liked women. That was always a factor in Azula being Azula, even if her family was sometimes inconsistent in accepting it. The woman that walked in was so astonishingly beautiful in her appearance that she was deeply grateful she was married....and instantly suspicious. Spirits at times took human shapes but they never quite did it right. In this case the 'not quite right' was more subtle.

"Can I help you?"

The figure turned toward her and flashed her a surprisingly warm smile.

"Yes, yes you can. My younger sister, I believe, has wandered into your world."

"OK." Azula's response had a more than slight edge of rudeness and skepticism though the other woman seemed amused. Usually Azula prized herself on grace but some random scammer walking into her pl-

"Into my world? Huh?"

The woman laughed a bit, a musical sound that drew her focus somewhat more than she anticipated.

"Well, it's a very long story and you wouldn't believe me if I explained it to you fully. I went to ask you before I asked the Avatar as your Avatar does things a bit.....differently. Too much of a reaction to that deeper truth. If I can I just want to find Del before she makes too much of a mess. The last time something like this happened it was Dream who handled it, but he's had his hands full with business involving a very strange incident with an AI. So it's my turn."

Azula steepled her fingers.

"And you're coming to me why, exactly? There's plenty of other people you could ask. Sokka, in particular, is one of the best trackers in the world."

Another musical laugh.

"Sokka, regrettably, would be too distracted by certain...elements."

"Right, OK." Again Azula found her voice taking on that skeptical tone.

She stood up.

"Before we do this, what's your name?"

The woman smiled and that smile seemed to shift just a bit.

"My name is Death."

-------

Republic City was not quite certain what to make of the person who was at times a child of seventeen, a child of seven, or a young woman. At any given time she could walk with light trailing behind her, a school of fish that swam through air as if it was water. Her eyes, heterochromic, glowed with an eerie light and her voice had a strange quality that induced an equally strange giddiness in all who heard it, unapologetically.

Delirium of the Endless hummed in a dissonant set of sounds both loud and soft, tangible and intangible at the same time. She always loved visiting these kinds of worlds, her big brother made such wonderful stories. If the masses in the great city of steel and glass looked at her with a strange fear she did not let herself notice.

It was easier to just walk in cities and explore the sights than to vent the emotions boiling through her or admit she had them, but that was what it was. Behind her fish trailed and transformed into kaleidoscopic sparks. One incautious person touched one of the sparks and began to laugh in a giddy fashion and jerked in motions until they fell over, spasming.

[mellometal]

Surprise, bitch. I bet you thought you’d seen the last of me.

(Please tell me at least one of you got that reference.)

Anyways, jokes aside, the slaughtering of Dhar Mann’s videos is back and running! I’M BACK. Sorry for the long wait. I’ve had a lot of personal stuff going on, which I’ve been very transparent about and I wasn’t in the right headspace to tear apart Dhar Mann’s videos due to that. 

Y’all are in for a real treat today. Why? Because I’m tearing apart TWO of his videos in ONE post! They’re all the same premise, basically. Both of these videos are about people scamming others out of their money by faking injuries and disabilities! Ain’t that nifty? /s

Both of these videos have these things in common: insurance fraud, scamming people, and faking injuries and disabilities. Obviously, we all know those things are extremely fucked up.

For anyone who’s not aware, Dhar Mann has actually committed fraud in the past that he pleaded no contest to in 2014. Fucking shocker, I know. He’s such a kind soul, right? How could he do something so EVIIILLL? /s

He’s actually never served jail time, let alone was ever arrested, for the five felony counts related to a scheme to defraud the City (Oakland, California) by submitting false claims and receipts in order to receive redevelopment grant money. Those were all from the shit he did back in 2008 and 2009! He stole THOUSANDS of dollars from the city when he was an entrepreneur in the medical marijuana business! Dhar Mann served five years of probation. They let him off easy. Why? Oh, because his parents are super rich too and they paid to get him out of serving a jail sentence. 

In 2018, he made a blog post on entrepreneur.com about his “big mistakes costing him everything”. IT’S SO FUCKING FUNNY TO ME. JUST THE WAY HE PUT IT IS HILARIOUSLY BAD AND I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING. Like, BRUH. The fuck did you think was gonna happen? He wrote it out like he was a kid who got in trouble with his parents for not eating his vegetables and had to write out a whole fucking essay as to why it’s important to eat your veggies. It’s THAT bad.

ETA: Here's the link to the article. It's so bad it's funny.

Will there be any response from me? Unfortunately, not this time. These videos are too poorly made for me to make comments about. It wouldn’t be worth it at this point because Dhar Mann has his head up his own ass and won’t listen to the real people he’s actually hurting with his videos. It's obvious they're bad.

It's obvious that insurance fraud is a serious crime. Faking being disabled is disgusting. By faking disabilities, it makes it THAT much harder for disabled people to be taken seriously. It’s sickening.

Onto the first video I want to talk about. This first one has a man who fakes being disabled and fakes injuries all for monetary compensation, a lawyer who encourages her client to do this serious crime, a judge who’s EXTREMELY unprofessional, a few owners of small stores who are the victims of the crime that is injury fraud, and an undercover FBI agent.

Committing insurance fraud can usually end up with a prison sentence of up to five years per false claim (like what this man and his lawyer did in the video), but it can reach up to twenty years. There’s also a penalty that can be up to $250,000 per incident. It’s no joke. (Kids, don't do this, please.)

The first video starts off in a court room. The “victim” (the plaintiff) gives the store owner (the defendant) a piece of his mind, then the guy’s lawyer does the same thing. Hey, as a lawyer, you should know better. That’s extremely unprofessional. The store owner is obviously distraught. He's remorseful. He feels horrible about someone getting hurt in HIS shop, but he’s determined to fight his case. He didn’t do anything wrong.

The judge tells everyone to rise, then says everyone can sit down in an unprofessional way. He tells the plaintiff to tell their side of the story. The lawyer tells the judge that her client tried to grab onto one of the hand bars in the disabled bathroom stall, found that it wasn’t installed properly, and he fell. The store owner interjects and tries to tell the judge that what they were saying wasn’t true...without saying that he objects. The judge gets angry with the store owner...which again, is unprofessional.

The lawyer shows the judge the photos she took as evidence. (I'll get to why these claims are absolute bullshit.) After that, the judge finally tells the store owner to tell his side of the story.

The store owner is adamant about installing the hand bars in the disabled bathroom stall properly, he genuinely had no idea how that even happened, and he's still remorseful. The judge ruled in favor of the "victim", asks for the store owner to pay out $25,000, and court was dismissed.

The lawyer and the "victim" are seen gloating about being successful in pulling off another scheme. The "victim" tells his lawyer that he needed to get out of the wheelchair. His lawyer denies this by saying that she doesn't want to get exposed.

They then go to another independent business to pull off the SAME scam. They do this at a small boutique. The store owner goes around to catch them in the action when he bumps into an undercover FBI agent. The FBI agent asks him what he was doing, and he tells the agent that he’s trying to gather evidence. The agent understands and goes on his merry way.

We see the lawyer going into the dressing room while the “victim” is browsing around for a dress shirt to try on. She goes in with the screwdriver, unscrews the hand bars in the dressing room, then comes back out. The “victim” asks one of the store clerks if he could try on a shirt he picked out, so he goes back there, and he “falls��� in the dressing room. LIKE HOW HE “FELL” IN THE DISABLED BATHROOM STALL AT ANOTHER STORE.

What makes these claims absolute bullshit is the fact that the lawyer carried around a screwdriver to uninstall the hand bars to make her client "fall" (she had it sticking out of her suit jacket). Plus, if a disabled person were to actually fall from improperly installed hand bars in the disabled bathroom stall, the holes in the wall wouldn't look clean WHATSOEVER. The screws would not come out clean like if you were to unscrew them out of a wall. Part of the wall and the screws would most likely be ripped out and the disabled person would be SERIOUSLY hurt (depending on the person). Like, you'd have to go to the hospital, most likely. The way that the "victim" "fell" was like he practiced it, like how you would in theatre. (I've practiced how to "fall" safely when I was in theatre for scenes where you have to faint or pass out. There's a trick to doing that without hurting yourself. Theatre kids, you know what I'm talking about.) He was still in the fetal position in his chair on his left side. He had NO injuries whatsoever.

His lawyer JUST so happened to be there! Convenient timing! She introduces herself (even though they clearly know each other already) and tells the people working in the store that she’ll be seeing them in court for their “negligence”. The store clerks have no idea what she’s even talking about and they’re understandably afraid. I don’t think the owner of that boutique was there at the time. (Don’t they have security cameras all over the store? I would think they'd catch onto what the lawyer did in one of the dressing rooms if they did.)

They pull off this scam, they're seen LAUGHING about fucking scamming people and committing a SERIOUS CRIME, and the store owner from earlier catches them when the "victim" gives the wheelchair back to his lawyer. They take the store owner's camera, taunt him, and then the lawyer EATS the SD card! They go off into the sunset, laughing like your stereotypical mean girls in Beverly Hills.

They go back to court, where the store owner is still trying to defend himself. The judge isn't budging at first, the lawyer is acting like the store owner is lying (he isn’t), and the store owner is trying to tell the judge exactly what happened. He’s almost ordered to pay out $25,000, which would mean that he’d have to close down his store to even come up with that kind of money. That stops when the undercover FBI agent goes right into the courtroom to give the judge evidence to prove that the store owner is innocent. Apparently this guy has been investigating these two people for a while and was waiting to catch them. It ends with the lawyer AND the "victim" being arrested and the store owner is proven innocent. He never ends up having to pay the $25,000.

Hey, Dhar Mann. I have a few questions for you.:

Are you projecting? Because you did commit five counts of fraud. You pulling the same shit again? Just curious.

When you add in BIPOC and AAPI characters, why do you have to ALWAYS have to write them as either the victims, the heroes, or you write them to be absolutely awful people? This is ESPECIALLY the case with Black and Hispanic people in your videos. You ALWAYS write these two groups like this mainly, and I don't understand why. The racial aggression in your videos isn't cute. Knock it the fuck off. Why not just write them as normal people, WHICH IS WHAT THEY ARE?

Is your concern for small business owners genuine? Do you actually care about small businesses? Or did you just add them into this video for brownie points to feed the gross excuse for a savior complex you have?

The second video I want to talk about is pretty much the same thing, except this involves a couple and they don't fake disabilities! They do fake being/getting injured though. I’ll call the guy with the nice car “Nice Guy” and the scammers “Scammer 1″ and “Scammer 2″. They don’t have any names, unfortunately.

It starts off with Nice Guy backing out of a parking lot when Scammer 1 "falls" behind the car and yelps out in pain. Nice Guy gets out of the car to see what happened and he’s freaking out because he thinks he just hit someone by trying to back out of a parking lot. He wants to make sure that Scammer 1 is okay.

Scammer 2 runs over to her boyfriend to see that he “fell” behind the car, berates Nice Guy, Scammer 1 is crying out in “pain”, and Nice Guy is trying to come up with a solution. He gives the two scammers $600 and they go on their way. Scammer 2 tells her boyfriend that he put on a great performance. Little did they know that Nice Guy heard everything they said.

But wait, kids! There’s more! It’s fuckin’ wacky!

They go to a little convenience store, Scammer 1 pulls out a water bottle out of one of the fridges that he didn’t pay for, and pours some all over the floor. Scammer 2 happens to walk in, "slip" on the spilled water, and land directly onto her back. The store clerk there goes over to see what happened, Scammer 1 introduces himself as a personal injury lawyer to Scammer 2, and they try to get monetary compensation from the store clerk. Little do they know that Nice Guy was watching them the whole time!

He caught them on camera trying to pull off a scam, he called the cops, and we never see Scammer 1 and Scammer 2 ever again!

Why is it that there were no security cameras in your store the first time around, but they were CONVENIENTLY THERE this time, Nice Guy? You could've proven your case and won the first time!

My thoughts on these videos? Super boring. Ableist as hell. Super unrealistic. They're so poorly made that I didn't even want to make a comment on either of them!

It looks obvious that he's projecting, but I don't know. What do y'all think?