#why is there not a SINGLE married woman at this entire school for the love of god
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br1ghtestlight · 1 year ago
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making a bobs burgers oc but its just the 7th grade teacher bcuz we dont have one in canon. in my fanfic he was called mr. huang as an obvious reference but kinda vibe with him now..... im willing him into existence he's real now. but honestly i might end up drawing him. here are all the wagstaff teachers we have so far (from memory)
mr frond: guidance counselor/general everything do-er
coach blevins/mr belvins: science teacher and gym coach. possibly also coaches the basketball and wrestling teams?
ms merkin: music teacher
mr ambrose: librarian
mr branca: custodian
ms labonz: 4th grade teacher
ms twitchell: 6th grade teacher
ms jacobson: 8th grade teacher
mr grant: spanish teacher and a/v club advisor
mr desanto: photography teacher (extremely funny that they have a Dedicated photography teacher at wagstaff but apparently one singular teacher for the entire 4th grade year. WHAT is this schools budget breakdown)
nurse liz: school nurse
ms. padaro: only seen teaching the history unit in 4th grade but im choosing to believe she's also a fifth grade teacher most of the time
prinipcal spoors: school principal (never appeared in an episode)
mr branca: janitor
ms schnur: receptionist i think??
ms selbo: also possible receptionist but for the entire school instead of just principal spoors
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midnight-in-town · 1 year ago
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Ao no Exorcist is a Shonen series written by a woman and it shows
Since the latest chapter, I've been thinking about how several usual Shonen tropes are written rather differently under Kato-sensei's pen. No judgement or anything, it's just cool to observe. Some examples :
1) Rin's mentor is a woman
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2) Rin's secret, despite being the MC, was revealed in ch13 to the entire cast, meanwhile Shiemi, The Main Girl, who was introduced to be so helpless is only starting to be explained.
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3) Also, the Mysterious plot-relevant Shonen Parent is actually the twins' mother. (Of course Shiro is super plot-relevant too, but Satan is still angsting over Yuri and she's a huge part of the reason why he's the big bad)
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4) Rin also changed his view about his future throughout the story: from dropping out of school, passing by hoping to become the Order's Paladin (probably to cope with Shiro's death and also to antagonize Arthur), to finally showing way more interest and potential in the (less epic and heroic in appearance) field of talismanic cooking.
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5) When it comes to arcs, mental illness is a valid reason to build a character arc around...
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6) And so is making an arc about girls being "cursed" to basically "get married and have children before they hit 30, the age where their beauty fade thus they become useless" :
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7) ANE is a story about women becoming traitors to protect their loved ones, like Mamushi
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or becoming overwhelmed because men toyed with their feelings like Tamamo
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8) Older women can be absolute badasses like Shiemi's grandma
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or Lucy.
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9) Complicated mother-daughter relationship and girl friendships are given as much focus as complicated father-son relationships and sweet bro friendships (like Bon and his dad during the Kyoto arc, as well as the complicated but deep bond between the Kyoto Trio)
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10) And one of my favorites: full time single dad, asking for help to do the job as well as he can and finding his true purpose in life by doing so :D
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Hmm and now that I think about it, the only other Shonen series written by a woman I've been as invested in is Kuroshitsuji, by Yana Toboso, and similar examples can be found in it too, namely:
1) If Ciel ever finally admits needing a mentor, his aunt Frances will probably play that role
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2) Girls can be super strong & skilled (Elizabeth, Mey Rin) and clever (Sieglinde)
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3) (one part of) the Big Bad is a woman (Queen Victoria)
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4) maybe Ciel's entire revenge stems from a conflict between Queen Victoria and Ciel's maternal grandmother, Claudia.
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5) the Undertaker has been a continuously freaking pain in the ass because he probably fell in love with that same maternal grandmother and couldn't mourn properly
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TL;DR we love our boys and their spectacular growth and development under women's pens a.k.a shonen series written by ladies are hella fun to read. :D
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onesonlee · 3 months ago
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Honestly, I don’t understand some of the criticisms against Martha. I’ve watched several videos, and it’s always the same comment: people blame her for falling in love with the Doctor. But let’s be real—she’s not the only one who developed feelings for him. Many companions have been in the same situation, and no one seems to have a problem with them.
Take Rose, for example. She not only fell in love with the Doctor, but their relationship was framed as a romantic storyline. River Song is literally married to him, though their dynamic is much more mature and balanced. Clara shares an incredibly deep emotional bond with the Doctor; while it’s not always romantic, she’s willing to do anything to stay by his side. Even companions like Sarah Jane or Madame de Pompadour had feelings for him.
So why is Martha singled out and criticized for something that’s a recurring theme in the series? What bothers me even more is that people also criticize her for being jealous of Rose. Yet, Rose herself showed jealousy—like in School Reunion, when she was clearly uncomfortable with Sarah Jane’s history with the Doctor. Jealousy is not unique to Martha.
I feel like Martha is judged much more harshly than other companions. Maybe it’s because her relationship with the Doctor was unrequited, which made her more emotionally vulnerable. She felt invisible to him, especially compared to Rose, whom he still idolized. But is that really a reason to hold it against her? Her jealousy is a human reaction, an understandable response to a painful and frustrating situation.
In my opinion, these criticisms lack nuance. Martha is a strong, brilliant woman who eventually recognizes her worth and chooses to leave the Doctor—a bold and empowering decision that few companions have made. She deserves to be appreciated for her entire journey, not reduced to these unfair criticisms.
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brucewaynehater101 · 3 months ago
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I have a really soft and cute au for Lesbian Janet that could work in any universe but I think works best in the Young Justice TV Show Universe.
See, everyone gets really confused when Tim talks about his Mom, sometimes referring to her as Mama. Tim thinks that using two different titles like that should make it Obvious that he has Two Moms but well. The Bats may be Super Geniuses but they are still Idiots. Tim is also an absolute Mama's Boy with Both his Moms. He loves them both So Much.
Oh, where is Jack you ask? He doesn't actually exist. He's the fake name and personality that Tim's Mama came up with and used Magic to disguise as so they could get Legally Married For Tax Benifits. Also to get his Mama a legal identity. Why would she need one of those? Well... as was mentioned, Tim's Mama has Magic with a Captial M. This by extension means Tim is Magic With A Capital M as well. Totally has nothing to do with Janet and his Mama sculpting him from clay and breathing life into him. Woes of pregnancy who? Not Janet that's for sure.
Also Tim does Not tell anyone that he has Magic and he doesn't show it off. The only reason the Bats found out about it is because Tim came to a meeting with Bruce and Diana went "you. Your Magic is Familure but I don't know from where." And Tim was sweating while saying, "Magic? What magic??" And after getting questioned by Diana and Bruce he Caves and tells them a half truth, "fine. I was made from Clay, like you. My Mom didn't want to go through the struggles of Childbirth but still wanted a child. Instead of adopting like any sane and rational person, she made a deal with a God or Godess. I don't know all the details but she owed them something in exchange for Me. I do know the debt has been paid already though."
The debt was simply a tea spoon of blood for the ritual and A Kiss. Janet over paid the second part by a lot.
As for how Janet met and wooed A Goddess? Well, she was on a dig in Greece when her boat she was using to get to another island was caught in a storm and washed up on a different island. The Goddess was expecting violence or anger at being stranded, perhaps even Sorrow. But no, Janet took one look at the Temple in the distance and was pushing past her saying she needed to get to the Temple because it's clearly in *amazing* condition and could bring So Many insights into Ancient Greek culture and building practice. For the first time in decades, as this Random Woman ran her hand along a pillar and started rambling about the design and what the type of collums were called, Circe felt herself blushing.
CIRCE?!?!?
FUCK YEAH.
Anyways, this is absolutely adorable. Fuck. I would love an entire fic of Janet. Here's a general plot line:
Janet hasn't ever really been interested in romance. She's tried dating a few guys in high school for appearance sake, but she usually broke the relationship off when they became too affectionate.
This is when others started referring to her as "cold." She wasn't, but few people got close enough to her to listen to her rambles about ancient civilizations, archeology, and sociality impacts of culture. She enjoyed other stuff, but nothing quite lit her up like those topics did.
In college, she did find and make a few friends with similar interests. This is where she figured out she was into women and not men. The relationships lasted longer, but she was single by the time she graduated with her bachelor's.
Her master's ends up as some sort of work study where she travels the world. She's more invested in her studies and work than relationships at this point. She enjoys learning about people's lives and cultures but doesn't seek out more than friendship.
I'm not sure if Janet has already or is working on her doctorate by the time she ends up lost on an island (or really how archeology even pays bills).
When she arrives on the island, there's a beautiful woman there as well. Janet notices this, but doesn't give a flying fuck in comparison to the architecture.
And Circe? Finds herself amused and confused by this woman who, although is into women, doesn't care about Circe's looks. Janet just keeps asking questions about Circe's life, the temple, the plants, the culture, etc. It becomes endearing watching her work late into the night with her research.
Janet is so enthralled in all that is going on that she doesn't notice Circe's continuous flirting. It's so fucking frustrating for Circe, but makes her unbearably fond as well. Janet starts to consider this drop dead gorgeous woman a close friend of hers as they "work" late into the chatting about ancient Greece, their past experiences, and their lives. Janet, who has some experience with romance but not much, even flirts back. After all, women call each other beautiful all the time and hold hands and shit. Surely Janet can platonically cuddle with her friend while Circe compares Janet's eyes to the night sky.
It's only when Janet is ready to leave that she realizes that she's willing to give up everything she's worked for, all of her findings and education, to have more time with Circe. Janet is in love with her best friend.
Also, Circe is able to get a fake ID as "Jack" due to magic and Janet's connections
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lialacleaf · 1 year ago
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To Care For A Woman
Chapter 3
Simon Riley X Reader
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Summary: You join the army as a last-ditch effort to avoid destitution, but when you sustain an injury protecting Lieutenant Ghost and earn yourself a medical discharge, you're stuck all over again. Or maybe not...
Warnings: Tension, Simon wants to care for you, small reader, a little bit spicy but not NSFW, man worrying about a woman's safety, typical cannon violence, deception, I'm sorry it's unedited...
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 chapter4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8
Reader’s POV
You weren’t sure why Ghost had to drive you out to your new home. He’d been insistent on seeing you there safely rather than letting quite literally anyone else do so. In fact, he’d almost seemed jumpy, stating that Simon wouldn’t like strangers near his home, and that you ought to keep that in mind.
How you were supposed to feel like this was anything but an elaborate plot to murder you and scatter your remains in the woods was unfathomable to you, but Ghost trusted Simon. While you weren’t entirely sure where you stood with the Lieutenant, he’d been the only one to stay back with you and ensure you got out alive.
“When will he be home?” You asked as Ghost focused on the road ahead. He’d given no indication how far the drive would be, and you’d left base about forty minutes ago.
“Tomorrow,” Ghost answered plainly, giving no indication as to what Simon was doing that would have him preoccupied elsewhere.
You let out a soft hum and leaned back in your seat. The humvee would occasionally jostle you, and you hissed at the pain in your knee. The pain medicine was beginning to wear off, but you were too afraid to bring it to Ghost’s attention.
Instead, you closed your eyes, and focused on your next steps. You would need to get some new clothes, having little more than the clothes you’d been sent off in. Maybe if Simon wasn’t too opposed to taking you into town, you could visit the second-hand store.
When you were young, your mother used to take you to pick out patterned tablecloths that had been donated, and would take them home and see you little sundresses.
You recalled a white one with frills that you wore down to the neighbor’s strawberry field, and hadn't lasted the morning before it was an unfortunate mess of red strawberry juice and mud after you had burrowed beneath the strawberry patch and clawed the fruit off the vine like a little, white mouse taking refuge in the cool dirt.
Your mother had called you a little troll for your bad behavior, and made you wear the stained up dress to school anyway.
The Humvee jostled you again, knocking your knee against the vehicle, and you nearly choked on the breath of air you inhaled. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. Ghost was anything but gentle, even in his driving.
Simon’s POV
He left you settled on his large, plush couch, your only bag on the floor by the door. The cabin was a single story, so he doubted you’d have much trouble maneuvering around as long as you had your crutches.
He’d given you his cell number, not that you knew it was his. You looked…lost as he walked out the door, and if he didn’t have work to finish for price before his leave, he’d have been tempted to tear the mask off his face and assure you that you wouldn’t have to spend the night alone.
It was still hard for him to comprehend that he was now a married man, even if this had been entirely his plan. It didn’t occur to him until you were seated on his sofa, looking as if you felt out of place in your own home that he didn’t know what he was doing.
He had a rough idea of how he wanted things to be. You’d get to know Simon, a second chance for him to redeem himself in your eyes as someone more patient and gentle, and with time you’d forget about the harsh treatment of Lieutenant Ghost. He didn’t try to fool himself into believing that you could ever love Ghost, but maybe he could convince you to love Simon.
The hour drive back to base didn’t feel real. It was still early, and he needed a cup of tea, something he would have preferred to indulge in alone, but alas…
“How’s married life?” Soap asked with a poorly disguised grin, and Ghost glowered at him from the sink.
“Not now, Johnny,” he warned, rolling his eyes. He hadn’t necessarily wanted Soap to know, but he’d also wanted a second opinion on his decision to offer you a bloody marriage contract.
Johnny had thought he was pulling a joke, until he’d seen it with his own two eyes. Once Simon had rather stiffly explained that he had some very confusing feelings for you that wouldn’t allow him to abandon you, the Scotsman had patted him on the shoulder and told him he was a good man. A bloody mad one too, but that was besides the point.
“Difficult drive with the Mrs.?” He asked, that grin still ever present on his face.
“Something like that.” Not at all like that. More accurately he simply didn’t want to leave you there all alone.
“Cut her some slack, L.T., one minute your her boss, the next your her husband, probably a real doozy for the lass.”
“She doesn’t know,” he said softly as Johnny popped a biscuit in his mouth.
“Doesn’t know what?” He asked over the food in his mouth.
“Doesn’t know she married me.”
The Scottsman choked on his biscuit. “Bloody hell!” He exclaimed, wiping a palm across his face. “Ghost, you’ve gotta be yanking my leg here, mate!”
Ghost shook his head.
“Who does she think she married?” Johnny asked, eyes blown wide.
The Lieutenant shrugged. “Simon Riley.”
Johnny sputtered for a moment and shook his head. “That’s so wrong, Mate. She’s gonna be bloody pissed when she finds out-“
“She’s not gonna find out, Johnny,” Ghost hissed. “She’s gotta forget about all of that. Move on with her life.”
“People don’ just forget that kinda trauma, Simon. She nearly lost her leg,” Johnny said.
Simon sighed, pushing his mask up over his nose so he could sip his tea. “Let me worry about my wife, Johnny.”
It was six in the morning when Simon was finally relieved from his post. He found himself spacing out all too often on the road home, pulled out of his thoughts only when the asphalt turned to gravel.
He liked having his home so secluded. He hoped you liked it too. He’d stopped for groceries shortly after leaving base, planning on having breakfast ready before you woke up. He probably should have paid attention before to how you liked your eggs, but it was too late for that now. He’d just have to guess and go with it.
He pulled up to the cabin, the gravel beneath the car grumbling a greeting to his return as he slowed to a stop.
Simon took a deep breath, hooked his fingers beneath his balaclava, and pulled the mask off before stuffing it in his duffel bag. He unpacked the groceries, storing most of the meat in the deep freezer in his garage before finally entering his house.
He kicked off his work boots at the door, his eyes scanning over the room as if he expected things to be out of place. He paused, however when he noted your small form curled up right where he’d left you, your bag still by the door and your crutches against the wall. You were curled in on yourself, likely trying to keep warm as he’d forgotten to turn on the heat for you.
Shit. He’d left you alone for hours in a cold, unfamiliar place. You were supposed to have slept in the bed. He’d expected you to acclimate yourself over the past twenty-four hours, and instead you had curled up on the couch and succumbed to an uncomfortable sleep.
That wouldn’t do.
He moved to your side as quietly as possible, kneeling next to you on the tan rug. His palm gently brushed the side of your head as he watched you closely. “Y/n?” he murmured, his hand moving to squeeze your shoulder.
You gave no sign that you were awake, and Simon sighed, lifting you up as carefully as he could. Once you were properly tucked into bed, he let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding.
His shoulders sagged, and with a soft groan he leaned back into the mattress, only just now noticing that he only had one pillow and you were using it. Not that he minded. He needed to take stock of just how unprepared he was for this endeavor.
He switched between staring at the ceiling, and staring at you. You didn’t move much in your sleep, which was a relief. You did, however, let out a soft whine, alerting him to the fact that he’d rested you on the side of your bad knee.
He frowned, internally scolding himself for not thinking of it sooner. It was easy to roll you onto your back, but the action caused you to stir, and Simon stiffened.
~
It must have been early when you woke, because the room was bathed in a soft glow from the sun barely rising outside the window.
It took you only a moment to realize you no longer dozing on the couch. Your eyes settled on the massive figure beside you, traveling up his waist to his chest and shoulders, before finally finding his face.
Simon, or rather you assumed it was Simon, had ruffled blonde hair, with deep set brown eyes and a strong jaw. Handsome for a soldier. You’d expected him to be plain. You were very wrong.
You sat up slowly, and he watched you like a hawk. You expected him to greet you with something, anything, even if it was just snapping at you for crawling into his bed, not that you remembered doing so. Instead he simply stared at you.
“What time is it?” you asked softly, your voice hoarse from sleep.
“Almost eight,” he murmured, and you blinked in surprise. He had an English accent, very mancunian, just like Ghost’s. The similarity was actually rather uncanny. “You can go back to sleep, or I can make breakfast.”
This felt very strange. You were in a stranger’s house, in their bed and said stranger was offering to make you breakfast as if you weren’t an intruder. You felt tears prick your eyes, suddenly feeling very out of place.
Simon’s brow dipped, a look of panic crossing his face as he tried to figure out what he’d done this time as tears spilled from your eyes.
“Y/n?” He asked, a shaking hand brushing your hair behind your ear.
“I’m sorry, this is just…really overwhelming-“
Simon was quick to pull you against his chest, pulling a soft gasp from you.
“You’re safe, I promise. M’ not gonna let anything happen to ya,” he murmured, those deep brown eyes gazing at you as if he’d loved you for a lifetime.
You blinked in surprise, taken aback by his response, your body slumping as your head dropped onto his heavily muscled shoulder.
“Why…why are you doing this for me?” You whispered.
“You made a sacrifice for one of my mates. You could have gotten killed. He felt responsible, wanted to see you taken care of, and…I wanted to help,” he said gently, stroking the back of your head.
You sniffled softly. “Is Ghost important to you?” You asked, gazing up at him curiously. Simon stiffened, unable to hold your gaze.
“Let’s leave the topic of Ghost alone for now, yeah? Give you some time to recover from what happened.”
You tilted your head at him in confusion, but nodded in agreement. It was his house after all. If he didn’t want to bring up work then so be it.
“You’re in good hands here, I promise.”
~
Two weeks went by, and you found that it wasn’t as difficult to adjust to Simon’s presence as you expected. He worked on base twice a week when he wasn’t on mission, and spent the rest of his time caring for you.
You couldn’t help but feel like a pet that was being spoiled more than it deserved. He’d bought you one of those nice, memory foam pillows, despite your insistence that you could just sleep on his large, plushy couch.
Truthfully you were a little frightened at the idea of sharing his bed, but he kept a respectful distance away from you, and there wasn’t even the mention of sexual expectations.
He slept on his back, or facing the door, something you assumed was an ingrained behavior.
He let you sleep in the mornings, but once you’d had breakfast he was practically dragging you out of the cabin to take a walk with your crutches, encouraging you not to stay in bed all day.
You supposed it was a good thing, as you’d likely become depressed if left to your own devices. He took you to town only once to find some new clothes, and gave you a very displeased look when you tried to insist on the thrift shop rather than the department store he pulled the truck up to.
“No wife of mine is walking around in a stranger’s hand-me-downs”
With that, he’d helped you inside and gotten you an array of loose pants and comfortable tops to spend your recovery in.
He was certainly committed to his promise of taking care of you.
He didn’t talk much, and you still found that a little unsettling, but his lack of words was matched by his aptitude for actions, making sure you didn’t so much as lift a finger unless you adamantly wanted to.
You hadn’t told your parents about the arrangement, and had been worrying just how you were going to go about keeping the situation on the down low. They’d call eventually, and you had to think of something to keep them from going into a panic.
You watched Simon from the corner of your eye as he started the truck, having helped you into your seat and gotten you buckled moments ago.
You weren’t sure if he was anxious about your check up, or if he was simply displeased at the thought of having you back on base. He seemed to dislike the idea very much if his hesitancy to bring you back to Dr. Radcliffe was anything to go by, but the doctor had insisted on it as he was the one to handle your knee surgery to begin with.
“Simon?” You called as the gravel road disappeared and gave way to paved asphalt. “Do you think Ghost will be available today? I never got to thank him for everything,” you said softly.
Simon tensed, and you couldn’t help but frown a little. “I’ll ask him,” he assured you, taking your hand in his and giving it a light squeeze.
A smile lit up your face, the first one he’d seen since the ordeal at the warehouse, and his heart aches for it. “Thank you, Simon.”
He nodded in response, but his stomach was in knots. He didn’t deserve your thanks. Not as Ghost, and not as Simon. Maybe someday, when you had forgotten all about what had happened to you, and lived a carefree life. Maybe then he could deserve it.
~
“I’ll be honest, I’m not entirely pleased with the results so far,” Dr. Radcliffe said as he looked over your x-rays.
“What does that mean?” Simon asked, his arms crossed over his chest.
“Is it bad?” You asked as you sat on the paper covered table.
“It means unless we get you set up with a physical therapist you’ll be on those crutches for the rest of your life.” The doctor explained.
Your eyes widened, and you were about to exclaim that you couldn’t possibly afford that when Simon cut in.
“What are her chances with the physical therapy?” He asked, placing a hand on her shoulder.
“Slim, but better. Might have a limp, but definitely more mobility.” Radcliffe assured him.
“I can’t afford Physical Therapy,” you cut in, and the two men glanced down at you.
“Yes, we can,” Simon said gently, brushing your hair behind your ear. You simply gaped at him in astonishment. PT was expensive, especially for such an involved injury. You couldn’t expect him to pay for that, but the warning glance he sent your way said that the two of you would not be discussing it now.
“I’ll send out a recommendation for the practitioner closest to you.” Radcliffe said. “However I’d still like to see you back here a month from now.” You nodded, and Simon ‘tisked’ in response.
Thanks, doc,” you said, offering him a small smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes.
~
Simon left you to your lunch in the mess hall with the excuse that he had some paperwork to do, and you didn’t question him once he set a burger in front of you. He was quickly finding that a good meal was all he needed to keep you in a good mood.
He felt ridiculous, slipping into his office and shucking off his civilian clothes in exchange for his uniform and mask, before turning around and thundering back to the mess hall.
He didn’t plan on this double-life mess, but he was going to put an end to it. His eyes landed on your little form happily munching away on your lunch, and he let out a deep sigh, clearing his throat as he approached you.
“Ghost?” You looked up in surprise, wiping the condiments off the corner of your mouth on a napkin. He always saw you use your shirt sleeve, and he felt a swell of pride that you liked the little green sweater he’d gotten you enough to preserve its newness.
“Simon said you wanted to see me?” He asked gruffly, crossing his arms over his chest.
You nodded vigorously. “I wanted to thank you for your help. I don’t know what I would have done otherwise-“
“This is what you called me down here for?” He asked, and your face fell. He felt the absence of your smile as an ache in his chest.
“I…I just thought…you’d want to know that I’m safe,” you said.
Simon felt his heart swell at the words. It was a relief to hear you say it, and it made what he was about to do even harder.
“One less thing to worry about then,” he stated grumpily, turning on his heel with a roll of his eyes and leaving you to gape at his back.
~
He felt like a kid in a play, switching costumes depending on his role in the moment. Price raised a brow when Simon passed his door four separate times in two different outfits.
He could have sworn he heard Johnny mutter “you don’t want to know.” To his captain. They were going to give him hell for this.
He was nearing the mess hall when his phone chimed the very specific sound he’d set for you, and was quick to open his messages.
I want to go home.
He wasn’t sure if he should be glad you viewed the cabin as home, or worried about the damage control he was going to have to do.
He entered the mess hall, preparing himself for whatever state of disarray you’d be in, only you weren’t there. His head whipped around the room, looking for any sight of you, but you had seemingly vanished.
Shit.
Where are you?
He rushed out of the mess hall, looking for any sign of your presence. He didn’t see your crutches, so he could only assume you’d left on your own.
I’m in the truck.
He let out a breath of relief, pulling the keys from his pocket. He probably would have put the whole base on lockdown if you hadn’t replied.
He made quick strides to the parking lot, opening the door to the driver's seat and hauling himself in as quickly as possible.
“Everything alright?” He knew it wasn’t, but it felt polite to ask anyway.
“M’ fine,” you mumbled, leaning your head against the door.
Simon bit his lip as he watched you wilt. You looked as if the life had been sapped out of you. Maybe he’d been too harsh.
“Y/n?” He called, placing a hand on your shoulder. You didn’t acknowledge it and he sighed. “Let’s go home,” he mumbled.
You were silent the entire drive back, and Simon was genuinely starting to question if he’d broken you. You had just gotten some rather bleak news.
“We could stop at that bakery in town,” he offered, glancing at you to gauge your reaction.
“I’m not really in the mood.”
Simon pursed his lips, his brow ticking slightly. He was trying to make things better, why were you fighting against him? Ghost was supposed to be the villain here, not him.
Your mood only seemed to worsen as the day went on, and Simon couldn’t wrap his head around it. At least until you snapped.
“Can I please just do one thing for myself!”
He’d just wanted to take up your dinner, shooing you out of the kitchen so he could do so when you decided you’d had enough.
“You do everything for me. I’m not a child, I’m a grown woman! For fuck’s sake it’s like I’m a prisoner or something!”
Your tirade was followed by a pathetic hobble down the hallway and slam of the bathroom door. He was fairly certain he heard muffled sobs before the tub faucet was turned on to drown them out.
Simon crossed his arms and leaned against the kitchen counter with a frown. You weren’t just upset about Ghost, he realized. You were upset about your leg, about the feeling of losing your autonomy, and his dismissal of you in the mess hall had been the proverbial cherry on top.
You had said you felt safe, but what you really felt was stifled.
He let out a deep sigh, running his hands through his hair. It seemed while keeping you in bubble wrap suited him just fine, it was slowly eating away at you.
This wasn’t what he had wanted for you. He’d wanted you to be able to do things that made you happy, not be stuck doing nothing at all.
You may have been small, and fragile compared to Ghost, but you had still been a soldier, and it was something you took pride in. He hadn’t meant for you to lose purpose, but if you were really going to be happy here, he needed to help you find a new one.
~
You felt terrible. You shouldn’t have snapped at Simon. You should have just calmly explained that you needed him to give you some space, but after Ghost had reminded you just how useless, how much of a burden he saw you as, it had triggered the rage that had been building in you for a while now.
None of this was fair. You had done your job well, despite being at a higher risk, you’d put the well being of your teammates above yourself to the very end, and your mind was still just as sharp.
Despite all this, it seemed both Ghost and Simon thought you were useless. The difference was Simon didn’t seem to tack worthless onto the list of things you were as well.
You didn’t feel right sleeping in his bed that night, or taking advantage of any of the kindnesses he’d given you for that matter. You were tempted to go sleep outside but it was freezing. Instead you curled up under a blanket with one of Simon’s chess books and read until you fell asleep.
At some point you heard him get up and put on a kettle for tea, before venturing out through the back door. You pretended to still be asleep if only to avoid the impending confrontation.
You eventually heard the telltale sound of a saw in his work shed, and supposed the coast was clear to make a cup of tea.
You went back to reading your book, not sure what else to do, until Simon’s footsteps sounded on the back porch, followed by the door opening. You tried not to stiffen when he stopped right in front of you. Maybe he’d been out there making the coffin he was going to bury you in for being an ungrateful little-
“Could use a hand if you’re not busy.”
Your eyes flicked up to meet his. “With what?” You asked skeptically.
He held out a hand to you, a gentle smile spreading on his face. “You’ll see.”
He walked slowly, acting as a crutch so you wouldn’t need to get them out of the kitchen. He led you to a portion of the yard that had been sectioned off with wooden planks. There was a chair seated beside it, along with a small shovel and a rake.
“What’s this?” You asked as he helped lower you into your seat.
“Garden box. Gonna start growing stuff,” he explained. “Fresh tea is good for you, especially in the colder months.”
He pulled a pair of gloves on and handed you a slightly smaller pair, along with the handheld shovel. “You can start pullin’ dirt out of those bags and droppin’ it in here,” ge explained.
“Wouldn’t this go faster if you just dumped these in yourself?” You asked as he picked up the rake.
Simon shook his head. “You could use some fresh air, and you might as well accomplish somethin’ instead of sittin’ like a bump on a log.”
You could tell he was excited about his little task by the way his accent got thicker, and you had to admit it was a little cute.
“Fair enough,” you murmured, shoveling dirt into the box for him to spread out with the rake. It was a little mindless, but the sound of the birds was nice, and the sun slowly rising in the sky casted a warm glow on your face.
Once you’d emptied two bags of dirt Simon went inside to grab you both a bottle of water before planting the seeds. He handed you the bottle, and a little packet of electrolyte mix, but he didn’t mix it for you, and instead went about opening the little seed packets after having downed his own water.
You had to admit that Simon was quite the sight in that tight gray shirt with a shovel in his hands. You bet he looked even better with a rifle.
“I’m sorry about yesterday,” you murmured as he passed you a small packet of seeds. Simon paused, looking up at you in surprise, before nodding at you.
“I…I’m sorry that I wasn’t paying attention before,” he began, taking a step towards you and cupping your cheek with his large hand. “I see you now,” he murmured softly, bending down to place a kiss on your forehead.
You let out a sigh of relief, leaning against him as your arms wrapped around his middle. “Thank you, Simon,” you whispered as he returned your embrace.
AN: wow this ended up being long~ Lots of drama to come!!!
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theidiotwhowritesthings · 2 years ago
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TAKE CARE OF YOU [3]
Sugar Daddy!Joel Miller x Female!Reader
Overall Warnings: slow burn, angst/comfort, power imbalance, age gap, possessive tendencies, eventual smut, #daddyissues, independent reader learns to let go and relax, emotionally constipated Joel Miller learns to be vulnerable; (more specific warnings to be added to individual chapters if necessary)
Chapter Word Count: 4,501
Summary: You spent your entire adult life supporting yourself and barely getting by. It's why a life of ease offered to you by a mysterious stranger sounded so foreign and unbelievable. Joel Miller, dressed in flannels that had seen better days, didn't look like the kind who could promise you the world on a plate, but he seemed desperate to help out. All he asks is that you let him take care of you. That wouldn't be so hard. Would it?
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[a/n: I'm feeling Fridays for the update day, but i'm not married to that idea yet. also thank you for all the love this has seen so far!! I am so happy to know I'm not the only one that would sell my soul to have Joel Miller as my sugar daddy.]
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03: YOU THINK MY VOICE IS PRETTY?
"the way his voice sounds, or the words he speaks, i can never decide what pulls me in more." -butterflies rising
‘Morning, sugar’.
You chuckled at the term of endearment and leaned back in your seat. The other people on the bus surrounding you were living their own lives as always. You recognized many of your routine bus neighbors. The woman who ate an onion bagel every single morning on her way to work, the man who still read an actual newspaper rather than use his phone, the brother and sister duo⏤only teens⏤ on their way to school. You wondered how these people classified you in their head. 
‘Morning to you too⏤’ You paused. Should you call him ‘daddy’ again? Saying it teasingly was one thing, but typing it somehow made it seem more permanent. Which was a stupid thought to have, but it was the one that plagued you nonetheless. You deleted your words and started again. ‘Morning! How⏤’ Again, you froze. Was the exclamation mark too much for this early in the morning? It was only yesterday that you made this deal with him and it would be sad for you to annoy him so early in the deal. Delete. Repeat. ‘Joel⏤’ Way too formal. Okay. You were officially over thinking this.
‘Hey! How’s your morning going?’
The moment you hit send that dumb little anxiety riddled voice at the back of your head tried to criticize your choice of words and you had to wrestle it back down. Almost immediately you saw the text bubble of dots pop up as he typed.
‘Great. First meeting got canceled. You?’
It was marginally funny to you that the man who owned this huge company seemed so dead set on avoiding meetings. Plus, it was kind of cute that he was more comfortable in flannel than suits.
‘Just on the bus heading to work!’
The text bubble popped up immediately, then disappeared, then came back, then disappeared once more. As you waited for it to return, his name filled the entire screen as he called you. Your eyes widened in surprise. After getting past your shock, you answered, “Uh, hi.”
“Sorry, repeat that for me.” Joel’s voice was nearly drowned out by a bunch of noise that you’d have to guess dealt with some kind of construction. “You’re on the ‘what’ heading ‘where’?”
“Bus? Work?” You replied in confusion.
Joel cleared his throat and he must have been moving since the noise simmered down. “Yeah, that’s what I thought you said, darlin’. Can I ask why?” The sound that left your mouth was a good representation of your broken brain. “Because I’m pretty sure you and I made a deal yesterday. Didn’t we?”
“We did.” You said slowly. “But⏤”
“Darlin’⏤”
“In my defense, I can’t just quit work. I respect Henry too much. I have to at least give him a two weeks notice so he can find a replacement.” You argued. Even if Henry wasn’t someone you considered family you’d still feel obliged to quit the correct way. Still, maybe that was something you should’ve mentioned yesterday before the two of you parted ways. “Sorry, Joel.”
He let out a small sigh. “There’s no need to be sorry. I understand. You’re too responsible for your own good.” You chuckled. “But the bus? The bus?”
You had to resist the urge to laugh at how insulted he was at the prospect of you on public transportation. You glanced over your shoulder out the window to see how far from work you were. “Well, ubers and taxis are so expensive from my house to the bakery. Plus, I have a bus card!”
“Bus card?” Joel repeated. His incredulous voice took an amused tone. “Sugar, you got daddy’s credit card.” Your eyes widened and you felt your entire face burn as heat filled your cheeks. As if somebody would be listening in, you glanced around at the people sitting near you. Joel chuckled, the sound low and deep, “What’s wrong? Cat got your tongue?”
“I, uh, I⏤ That’s a good point.” You cleared your throat. “It felt silly using the card for something like an Uber or taxi though. You know?”
“Nothin’ is too silly. I want you to use that card. All the time. Understand?”
“I understand.”
“I understand…” Joel repeated with enunciation at the end. Waiting for something. Waiting for…
“I’m on the bus.” You whispered into the phone, in shock, while covering your mouth.
Joel hummed. “Oh, I know. Now. I understand…”
You chewed on your lower lip, glanced around, then whispered into the phone quickly, “I understand, daddy.”
“Sorry, sugar. Couldn’t quite hear you there. Must be because of how loud and hectic that bus is.”
Your lips curled up into a broad grin as your face continued to burn. He cleared his throat to urge you on, and you shook your head with a slight chuckle. You blew out an amused breath and repeated yourself. “Yes. I understand, daddy.” 
An older woman sitting to your left shot you a curious glance and you sunk in your seat, and turned toward the window to laugh. You could hear Joel’s breathy laugh over the line as well. Joel spoke up, “That’s better. As for this transport problem,” You rolled your eyes still grinning, “Can you drive?”
“Well, yeah.” You replied and the smile fell as a thought occurred to you. “That is not a reason to buy me a car.”
“Wow, you really think I’d buy you a car right out the gate like that?”
“Oh. Right. Sorry. I⏤” You paused then shook your head. “Wait, no, actually I do. I do think you’d do that.”
“You’re right. I would. You got a preference, sugar?”
“Please do not buy me a car.” You blurted. “I… I really don’t like driving around this city. Last time I even got behind a wheel was over two years ago.”
“Fine. No car. I’m gettin’ you a driver then.”
“That still feels excessive.” You replied hesitantly.
“Do it for me then? I’d feel more comfortable knowin’ you’re not ridin’ around with strangers.”
The words were spoken with kindness, actual concern, and a part of you wondered if he was saying what he was because it was expected of him? The deal was for him to take care of you and keeping you safe could arguably fall under that umbrella of responsibilities. You just found it hard to believe he’d care out of the goodness of his heart considering how little time you had spent with one another thus far. It wasn’t a criticism of him at all. Maybe he was just that kind deep down, maybe he did have a bleeding heart. It was the process of trying to apply that thought, those concerns, to yourself that felt silly. At the end of the day, that voice of anxiety just couldn’t fathom a near stranger actually worrying over your well being with no ulterior motive of their own.
Joel said your name over the line, snapping you out of your line of thought, and you forced your smile to return. It wasn’t hard to find. “Alright. For you.”
“Good.” He blew out a breath of what almost sounded like relief. “What time does your shift end?”
“It’s Sunday so I usually close up the shop around 5:30, then pack away all the leftovers to take to the shelter a few blocks away.” You replied. Anytime the shop had any leftovers, which was happening more and more, Henry would donate the goods to the local shelters and kitchens rather than toss it. 
“I’ll have my guy there around 5 then. I don’t want you waitin’ on him.”
“Yeah, but now he’ll have to wait on me.”
“I know. That’s the point, darlin’.”
You couldn’t decide which you liked more. Joel calling you ‘sugar’ or ‘darlin’. Then again the sound of your name was equally as intoxicating. Honestly, it wasn’t fair how good his voice sounded in general. The bus peeled off to the side to come to a stop and you hiked your bag up your shoulder to get off.
“I’m at my stop.”
“Say good-bye to the bus. You ain’t ridin’ on it again as far as I’m concerned.” You chuckled and as you walked off you couldn’t help but glanced back at the familiar people you had gotten used to seeing so often. You mentally wished them a farewell. It was cheesy, but it nearly felt like the end of an era. Joel spoke again as you stepped onto the busy sidewalk. “And remember, my guy is pickin’ you up today. No ubers. No taxis. No buses.”
“I know, I know. I promise I won’t make a run for it.”
“Good girl.” Joel chuckled and your face immediately went warm once more. A habit you were beginning to pick up around this man. Joel said quick good-byes, saying he needed to help someone out on site and promised to text you later. You echoed his sentiments and tucked the phone away after hanging up. Wow, okay, it seemed hearing him call you ‘good girl’ won in a fucking landslide.
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As it turned out, Henry had come in early to bake for the day, but left it open for you to set out as he hadn’t been feeling well and had to leave before you even got the shop fully open. It was incredibly poor timing because you planned to announce your two week’s notice to him and that seemed like a dick move to do while he was sick. Tomorrow. You’d try again tomorrow. No big deal. What would a one day difference make? 
The bakery always had it’s busiest days on Sunday, weirdly, but still it was nowhere near the kind of traffic this place truly needed. Usually days where it ended up being you alone were even more painfully boring, but today had been, well, fun. Joel continued to text you through the day and the conversation was a decent distraction from the dichotomy of doing nothing between customers. Plus, without Henry there, you didn’t even have to pretend like you weren’t playing on your phone the entire time. 
The last hour of your shift had gone by without Joel as a distraction because of a meeting. One he had grumbled about twenty minutes prior to it. You were in the process of packing items away when you noticed a black SUV sitting outside on the side of the road. Pausing in your work, you ran your hand down your apron and made your way out of the shop and toward it. You had just planned to tap on the window to get his attention, but you were barely halfway to the SUV when the man behind the driver’s seat jumped out and hurried around with a nod.
“Ma’am.”
“Hi.” You gave a small wave. “I’m⏤”
The blond man blurted your name out with a nod. Of course he knew who you were. “Is there anything I can do to help you, Miss?”
“No, no. I wanted to invite you in! It’ll be a minute before I’m done.”
“It’s alright⏤”
“I insist.” You said firmly. He hesitated once more before going to turn the car off. He was older than you, if you had to guess, and he wore a clean, black suit and a pair of dark aviators over his eyes. If he had a little radio in his ear you’d have him pegged as some kind of secret service guard. “What’s your name?”
“Riley Talbot, ma’am.”
You motioned for him to take a seat at one of the tables with a smile. “Well, Mr. Talbot, you have a muffin preference?”
“Just Riley is fine, and you don’t have to⏤”
“Either you tell me your muffin preference or I’m gonna pick at random, Riley.” You replied then ran through the options you had today. Riley hesitantly told you his preference for the banana nut option and you brought it over for him on a small plate. The man took his sunglasses off, tucking them into his inner suit pocket, and you took note of his very blue eyes. “How long have you worked for, Joel?”
Riley shrugged. “I’ve been working for Mr. Miller for the last five years.”
Your eyes widened in surprise. Five years as a driver for Joel? You couldn’t imagine Joel using a driver. The man who preferred flannels over suits seemed like the kind who was adamant about driving himself. Plus, this wasn’t the person who had picked you up yesterday. How many did he have?
“Well, give me a second here and we can head out. I just gotta finish packing up today’s leftovers.”
“Please, take your time.” Riley nodded then motioned to the muffin. “And thank you.”
You left him to enjoy his snack in peace so you could go back to cleaning out the display stand. It was repetitive, simple work that you had gotten very used to doing mindlessly over the years. You were on the last row of cookies when your phone buzzed in your back pocket. Pulling it out you saw it was a text from Joel.
‘Did Riley show up?’
‘Yupp. He’s in the bakery eating a muffin right now.’
‘You didn’t need to feed him, sugar.’
‘Too late. Besides, that’s one less muffin for me to carry now.’
‘Put it on my tab.’
You rolled your eyes, as if a singular banana nut muffin was of significant cost, ‘Shouldn’t you be focusing on your meeting?’
There was a longer pause before you got a response.
‘Touche’
You chuckled under your breath and tucked the phone away once more. After stacking a few of the boxes on top of one another, you shrugged out of your apron to hang it back up on the wall. Riley had risen from his seat and you took the plate from him before he could argue otherwise. You gave it a quick wash before setting it away to dry for the night and when you returned Riley was still standing by the boxes of baked goods.
“I’m almost done. I’m gonna carry these down to the shelter.”
“I’ll help.” Riley replied.
“You don’t have to do that⏤”
Riley gave you a friendly smile. “It’s my pleasure. Mr. Miller was adamant about me helping out where I could.”
Knowing arguing was only going to stretch this process out you nodded and he took half the boxes. At least this would save you a second trip. As the two of you made your way down the street you learned that he was older than you, in his mid thirties, and he had been in the Marines before picking up work with Joel. It was actually through Riley that you learned Joel had a brother who had also been in the military as well. You’d have to ask him about that.
“I’ve been saving to buy a ring.” Riley shrugged as you both got onto the topic of relationships while on your way back from dropping off the boxes.
“If your girlfriend is as sweet as you claim I’m sure she’d be charmed by anything you got her.” You argued. “And how long have the two of you been dating?”
“Three years next month.”
“Aw, congrats!” You chirped. 
Riley continued to gush about his girlfriend and how she worked as a kindergarten teacher. The way his voice held so much love for the woman he bragged about to you made your heart ache. You had always thought this was how your last relationship would look like. You and your ex-boyfriend had been on a similar path after all. When he broke up with you six months ago, the two of you had been weeks away from your three year anniversary. For the longest time, he had been the one you thought you’d be marrying.
And here you were today with a sugar daddy on speed dial.
Funny how life worked.
“Let me grab my stuff and lock up and I’ll be right back out.” You said and Riley agreed with a nod before heading to the SUV himself. Maybe you’d text Nima and see if she was busy tonight. It had been a long time since you thought about your ex and letting him slip back into your head had been a dumb move on your part.
Once out, Riley held the back door of the SUV open for you to slide into. He asked for your address which you provided before settling back in your seat. The radio played a soft tune, you couldn’t hear the roaring of the roads outside, the air smelled clean, and you had ample space to stretch out. This was a far cry from the bus. Nima texted you back, answering your request for drinks tonight, but she had to turn it down because she had a date. Though she did follow it up to ask if you were feeling well and that she’d bail if you needed a girls’ night. You smiled at her words, but reassured her that everything was fine.
‘Hang out with your daddy! 🤪’
Despite the teasing nature of her text, she may have been onto something. Riley was getting closer to your apartment complex and you leaned forward a bit. “Hey, Riley?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you know what time Joel usually gets off of work?”
“It depends. I think he mentioned today he was gonna be working late. That’s why he sent me instead of coming to get you himself.”
Your eyes widened in surprise. It hadn’t dawned on you that Joel wanted to be the one to pick you up and just hadn’t been able to due to his own work. Still, that shot your back up plan in the face. That was probably for the best. You didn’t want to come across as clingy. Though, maybe you were supposed to? Joel said there was no social quota for you to meet, but you doubted the validity of that.
“Thanks, Riley!” You said after exchanging numbers with him and climbing out of the SUV. 
Your apartment was nothing to write home about, but it could be worse. It was a simple one bed, one bath on the fifth floor of a complex that had technically seen better days. However, despite the age and general weariness of the building itself, the residents you lived beside were nice, the owner actually cared about the people renting from him, and security was decent. More so than the other places in this area.
After dropping your stuff down and tossing your keys into the bowl near your front door, you pulled out your phone to see you had missed a text from a few minutes ago. ‘You home?’ Quickly, you responded with a positive and thanked him again for sending Riley to pick you up. ‘Good. Don’t thank me, sugar’.
You rolled your eyes. If he really thought you were going to accept things without thanking him he was dead wrong. Hell, you were struggling with the ‘accepting things’ part which was hilarious considering you had chosen and agreed to this deal with full knowledge of what that meant. You set down your phone to clean the work day off of your skin.
A few hours had passed, where you showered, changed into home clothes, ate, and then settled on the couch with a large glass of wine. Despite it only being close to nine you were almost considering chugging the remainder of the wine in your glass and calling it a night. You had work in the morning after all. As you brought the glass to your lips, your phone buzzed off to the side. 
The text was from Joel. It was simple, and honestly hilarious to see.
‘You up?’
Your cheeks warmed and you wondered if he knew the connotations of texting a woman that message with no warning at night. 
‘Yes lol I am up’
‘Can I call?’
Your eyes widened in surprise at the request. You took another rather large sip of your wine before setting it down on your coffee table and responding to him. The affirmative text hadn’t been sent longer than a few seconds when his name flashed across your screen. You had gotten used to mostly texting the people in your life rather than phone calls. This would take some getting used to. 
“Hello?”
“Hey, sugar.” Joel breathed. “Sorry for calling late.”
“It’s hardly late.” You glanced at your clock on the wall. 9:07. “Are you just getting home from work? Riley said you’d be stuck there late.”
“Yeah. Unfortunately. Every once in a while I’m stuck in the office all day like this. At least I got to be on site this mornin’.” He groaned.
It sounded like he was pouring something on his end of the line. You commented on it, “Are you making yourself a drink?”
“Mhmm.” Joel took a sip of whatever it was he had poured, you could hear him swallow and made your throat dry up. “That alright?”
“Hey, I’m on my second glass of wine so I can hardly judge.”
“Second? You have a long day, sugar?” He asked in concern. Again, the sound of it caught you off guard. You could count on one hand the number of people who showed you genuine concern in the last two years. “Everythin’ okay?”
You forced out a chuckle and nodded despite him not being able to see it. “I’m fine.” It was probably a little early to be flooding him with your problems and the history of your ex. Instead, you jumped over it entirely. “I was actually gonna ask if you wanted to get dinner or drinks, but when I asked Riley what time you got off he said you’d be working late.”
“What?” Joel asked in surprise. He grumbled under his breath before speaking up. “Don’t ever let that stop you, darlin’. I always got time for you. Honestly, it would've been a nice surprise and a good excuse to leave early.”
You let out a soft laugh. “I’ll keep that in mind for next time.”
“You better.” Joel grunted as he dropped down into a seat. Another tired sigh left his lips and you opened your mouth to suggest that he get some rest, but he beat you to speaking. “Tell me about your day, sugar.”
“It was pretty boring.” You replied. “You’ve seen how empty the bakery tends to get.”
“So? I still wanna hear. Talk about somethin’ at least. Lemme hear that pretty voice.”
You grinned to yourself. “You think my voice is pretty?”
“I think everythin’ about you is pretty. Now, no more stallin’. Hit me with it.”
If he wanted to hear about your boring day you’d be more than happy to indulge him. His words still caught you off guard though. He liked your voice? It was extra funny considering how much you liked his voice personally. You talked about the few customers you did have today, how thankful the shelter had been for Henry’s leftovers, and getting to know Riley.
“Yeah, Riley is a good guy.” Joel agreed. “Figured the two of you would get along. Plus,” He took another sip of the whiskey he had told you he chose as his drink earlier, “I know he’s head over heels for that girl of his so I didn’ have to worry about him makin’ a move on you.” You laughed at the sentiment and Joel let out a small chuckle himself. “I ain’t kiddin’, sugar. I only just got you to agree to put up with me. I ain’t plannin’ on losing you quite yet.”
 “Put up with you.” You scoffed. “As if I don’t equally enjoy talking to you.”
Joel chuckled in response then cleared his throat. “How’d it go with your boss? How’d he take the news?” Your smile turned sheepish and rather than answer you picked up your wine glass, now at the end of your third, and took a long sip. Joel sighed. “Sugar?”
“Okay, so, hold on.” You blurted. “He was sick today. Henry left like right after coming in to help me open and I didn’t wanna spring the news on him when he already felt so terrible.” You set the wine glass down then buried yourself into the couch under your blanket. “I’m already worried I’m gonna break his heart.” Joel blew out a sigh and you winced. “Sorry.”
“No, no. Don’t.” Joel responded, but it wasn’t sharp or demanding. He just didn’t want to hear you apologize. “I want you to stop workin’ because I think you’d be happier out of that place, but I’m not tryin’ to shove you into quittin’ if you ain’t comfortable with it yet, darlin’. If…” Joel paused. “If you think you need to stay there a little while longer then I’m not gonna guilt you otherwise.”
His words made your lips curl up into a small, soft smile. It wasn’t that you loved your work there by any means, but you did love Henry. He was family. Plus, that small voice of anxiety was still nagging loud enough that you couldn’t quite fully ignore it. This was still so new. What if Joel got to the end of this week and decided you were more annoying than entertaining. You couldn’t just tear up your roots with no guarantee that this life was fully concrete. 
You didn’t know if Joel understood that from the same angle you did, but you did appreciate that he was willing to bend on that topic. “Yeah.” You said quietly then added in a teasing inflection added, “Thanks, daddy.”
Joel chuckled in response, “You’re gonna be the death of me, sugar.”
You remembered a topic you had planned on asking him earlier in the day, and maybe it was the three glasses of wine that had loosened your tongue, but you blurted it out without thinking. “So, hey, I hear you have a brother?” Joel was quiet for a beat and it was only then that sober logic regained control. “I mean, I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to blurt it out like that. Riley mentioned he was in the military and that you had a brother who was too. I didn't mean to pick at a sore topic if⏤”
“No, sugar.” Joel chuckled. “Not a sore topic. Just caught me off guard is all. But, yeah, I got a baby brother. Tommy.” Tommy Miller. You tucked the information away in the folder of facts you were learning about Joel. “He was in the Army for a while, but left a long time ago. He actually works with me now at the company. Was with me when we went from small time contractors to whatever the hell we are now.”
“Big deals.” You joked. “If your fancy building is anything to go by.”
“Guess so by someone’s definition.” Joel snorted. You liked that he still felt so grounded and to the earth. It had been part of the reason his proposition caught you off guard because after meeting him you never would’ve suspected him to be the kind who owned a large and very rich company.
“You’re not mad that Riley told me that, are you?” You asked. “Because if you are, I'll admit to wrestling the information out of him.” 
Joel laughed. “I ain’t mad, darlin’. Like I said, I’m glad the two of you get along. You’re stuck with him now.” You hummed in confusion and Joel added. “He’s your driver. Anywhere you need to go, any time, just call him.”
“Wait, seriously?” You cried.
“I told you I ain’t letting you get on a bus again.” Joel replied like he was still appalled you had done so this morning. “And since you won’t let me buy you a car…”
“Fine, fine, fine.” You blurted and he let out a soft laugh. A beat of silence stretched between the two of you, but it was a comfortable one. The kind where you just enjoyed knowing he was on the other end of the call even if he wasn’t actively speaking. 
You accidentally let out a small yawn and Joel hummed. “You need to get to bed.”
“Nuh uh.” You replied. “It’s only…” You found the clock and your eyes widened. 12:01. “Oh.”
“Yeah. Oh. I’ve kept you up long enough, sugar.”
“I’m not even tired.” You whined and rose to your feet. The stiff movements made you realize how close you had been to just passing out on the couch. 
“Sure, you ain’t.”
You meandered to your bedroom, flipping out lights as you went, and shut your bedroom door. “Will we talk again tomorrow?”
“You mean later today?” Joel joked.
You chuckled. “Yes.” It didn’t even matter to you that you may have sounded needy. Being on the phone had not only been fun, but it had been just what you needed to settle the turmoil you had accidentally scourged up earlier. “So?”
“Course, sugar. I’ll text you on your way to work. Riley’ll be there at 6:30 to pick you up.”
“Alright. Night, Joel.” You replied sincerely. “Thanks for talking to me.”
Joel hummed and you could hear him moving around on his end as well. “Should be thanking you.” He added quickly, a tinge or nervousness seeping into his voice. “Hey, do you wanna, uh, you wanna plan for dinner?” Your eyes widened marginally but your lips spread out into another warm and wide grin. “I got a few more busy days, but this Wednesday I’ll be free all evening. Wanna make a night of it?”
“Yes!” You answered much faster than you had initially planned. There went being cool and collected. Joel chuckled. “I mean, yeah. That would be⏤ That would be fun.”
“Good. Get some sleep, sugar.” Joel replied. You wished him well before the call ended and you were left standing in your bedroom feeling like you were on cloud nine.
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taglist:
@weddingfairy @bfences @jasminedragon @biwitchy @huffle-punk @shelbyteller @anoverwhelmingdin @aheadfullofsteverogers @stagerightlauren @basicoccult @rinnfey @boofy1998 @farintonorth @thepascalofus @amatis-gray @casa-boiardi @northernbluess @jettia
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✨J.M. Masterlist✨
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lilithess · 2 years ago
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ASTRO OBSERVATIONS IV
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capricorn suns are super wild (!!!) and easy to click with. nowhere near the boring capricorn stereotype. they are hardworking, reliable and tough people, but FUN! they have this motherly aura, more so than cancers. a capricorn to me is like a middle aged woman who decided to go wild after a few glasses of wine. and they’re not as judgmental as people claim them to be. the judgy rigid part that everyone talks about goes more for cap moons and mercuries.
aquarius loves a bit of drama (especially men) and wants attention (especially women), but not in a “in your face��� way, not in a desperate way. they will keep their cool at all times, it’s like they’re constantly trying to maintain a persona. but if you read between the lines, you’ll notice the competitivness and ego trips. they all have a little “notice me” sittin inside. leo is just more open about it. aquarius men are highly unbothered. aquarius women remind me of closeted scorpio women.
comparing virgo men and virgo women. i don’t know a single nitpicky virgo man. they’re actually all so different. if i met a virgo man, i’d had never guessed it’s him because there’s nothing really that stands out as a common trait. women share the intensity and are incredibly smart and shrewd. i think this sign’s intelligence goes unnoticed. it gives such a “quality” person, even tho the nitpicking can be annoying
geminis can lack a backbone and boundaries a lot, especially at young age. not sure what’s with the “player” stereotype bc i can’t imagine being manipulated by a gemini (especially a guy). they’re honestly kids. however, the gemini as in the sign itself and what it represents has a sort of dangerous potential. they can really be indifferent about matters that i’ve seen no one else be so indifferent about. sort of like “who cares so why not?” lifestyle. they’ll laugh at their own pain like it’s nothing so why not at yours? they have a troll like nature to them and their curiosity has no limits. can be a very dark sign who, for some reason, is considered a light social butterfly.
no one attracts jealousy as well as a leo placement, especially leo rising, venus, and preferably leo stellium. i know a leo rising and that energy ate up her whole chart. no mind her virgo or 12H placements, she’s just OUT THERE in the spotlight always stealing the show. however, i think leo’s intelligence should be apreciated more bc these people are really more than just a diva in a leopard crop top. i’ve seen leo placements dumb themselves down (very annoying) and honestly they can be very naive. the sun shines light at every other planet in our solar system, not the other way around. i think people forget that no matter how much leo seeks attention, they are also the ones giving it to others.
i know mutables are rumored to change the most, but scorpio’s ability to just… change their entire life, identity and being can make you wonder wheather you even knew the person or not. i had a scorpio sun, mercury, mars and ascendant bestie who went from being a rebellious femme fatale who wouldn’t leave the house without make up; wore heels to high school and messed with other people’s relationships for fun - to a stay at home “wifey” with no social life and a man who’s probably not even going to marry her. no one even hears from her anymore. scorpios really die and reborn a completely different person. it’s not the little changes that mutables do on a daily base or just mid conversation. it’s a whole other person.
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alice-after-dark · 7 months ago
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Rosie Bennett's Finishing School for Young Ladies
@hiemaldesirae finally got me with the fem!RadioStatic content lol also vaguely inspired by his Hazbin Institution for Homicide Practitioners AU (at least the idea of these two in a school setting).
This is the inspiration for the uniform.
Takes place during the late 1920s.
Alison Bourreau (20), upon the death of her mother, is forced to attend the school by her estranged father. Having grown up in the bayou of New Orleans her entire life, she is seen as an enigma among the wealthy and upper class students, especially due to her close friendship with the school's headmistress and founder, Rosie Bennett.
Vivian Haynes (19) hails from a wealthy family in New York. Having made his wealth in the metalworks, her father is a well-known industrialist and Vivian is instantly popular due to her family's name and wealth. She is an aspiring actress and a star student.
And they were roommates.
Alison knows who Vivian is the moment she walks in the door of their shared dorm. Even if she didn't, she can already tell a lot just by looking at the young woman. Her clothes are clean and fine, the latest fashion and coordinated perfectly. Her long dark hair falls in shiny waves and the soft hands speak of not a single day's worth of hard labor.
Vivian offers her a dazzling bright smile and Alison is immediately drawn to the girl's mismatch eyes, one an almost auburn shade of brown and the other a startling blue.
She's lovely, most certainly.
But seeing pristine stockings torn, dress stained, hair tangled, and those same soft hands covered in blood steals Alison's breath away.
"Please," she whispers, still kneeling in the dirt by a bloody rock. "Please don't tell anyone."
Alison knows the young man on the ground. He's from the college nearby, a junior who often comes around to hit on the students. He's crude and loud and idiotic and Alison despises him.
She steps over the cooling body of Adam Bright and kneels in front of the trembling woman and takes her by the shoulders. "We need to hide the body."
It is nearly 3am when Alison sneaks back into the dorms. Vivian's clothing has been thrown into the furnace and the young woman is sitting freshly bathed and clean on Alison's bed. Alison bathes and dresses and joins Vivian on the bed. They sit in silence for several minutes.
"Why did you kill him?" Alison asks softly.
Vivian pulls her knees up to her chest, continues to bore holes into the wall opposite them. "He said...he said he knew why I was sent here. He said he knew what I did and that he would tell everyone. He was demanding hush money, it...it would ruin everything. My family would be ruined. I'd be ruined."
Another beat of silence.
"What did you do?"
Vivian shakes her head this time.
Alison hums. Whatever it was, it was bad enough for her family to send their pride and joy away. Well, everyone had their secrets. She should know. She isn't even supposed to let anyone find out who her father is. As far as anyone is concerned, she is the poor orphan girl generously sponsored by the rich real estate broker.
"Her mother worked for us for many years. It was the least I could do after hearing about her unfortunate passing."
What a kind and charitable man. Bastard.
Alison isn't stupid. She knows she isn't here out of her father's good will. He just wants her far away from his wife and son, married off as soon as possible to be someone else's problem. That is the entire point of the finishing school, to make her as palatable a wife as possible (she remembers with satisfaction how utterly thrilled he'd been when he'd discovered, upon his arrival to pick her up, that she'd chopped her long brown locks into a haphazard bob).
Thankfully, he took Rosie's offer of admission to her school and won't be getting what he wants anytime soon.
A soft pressure settles against her shoulder.
"About tonight...you have to promise to never tell anyone."
"I promise."
"Do you swear on your life?"
"I swear on my life."
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Got a secret, can you keep it?
Swear this one you'll save
Better lock it in your pocket
Taking this one to the grave
If I show you, then I know you won't tell what I said
'Cause two can keep a secret if one of them is dead
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ippolita324 · 1 year ago
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Why Bellatrix Lestrange was so crazy (Most Noble and Ancient House of Black Headcanon)
• As someone who descended from generations of inbreeding, she suffered from mental instability from birth, which only worsened as she got older
• She inherited her Aunt Walburga’s explosive and dangerous temper, and extreme attitude on blood purity
• She had an inherently dominant and forceful personality, and excelled in anything that required adrenaline
• Her family environment was oppressive and as the eldest daughter she was given the most responsibilities snd expectations
• As Sirius and Regulus were both much younger, she was raised like a firstborn son and treated with little affection by her father
• However she was still a woman and could not escape the patriarchal values of the Black family which expected women to be submissive and continue the bloodline
• On the other hand she was also told the Blacks were the most illustrious family ever and thus she developed a high opinion of herself
• Her loud, argumentative and boisterous attitude did not sit well with her parents, who as a result constantly punished her
• Unlike her more suave sister Narcissa she was unable to hide her opinions and often got into trouble for it
• Despite being a top notch student, her parents paid little compliment to her achievements, instead expecting her to marry a pure blood heir as soon as she graduated
• Her parents cared little about her feelings and desires, but merely expected her to unquestionably follow their orders and honor the family name
• This authoritarian upbringing was what later endeared her to Voldemort’s authoritarian regime, and she gradually adopted her family’s cold and ruthless attitude
• As a teenager she was also insecure, craving for praise and validation that she never received, and having to shoulder her family’s responsibilities without having anyone to confide in
• She felt deeply betrayed by Andromeda’s elopement with Ted Tonks, as it was kept a secret, and despite herself taking the responsibility to protect her sisters, Andromeda did not appreciate it at all
• She fell in with the wrong crowd at school, many of her friends being the children of the first generation of Death Eaters, and they delved deeply into dark magic
• Her marriage with Rodolphus was arranged by their families, with little love or attachment, the main purpose being to forge a beneficial alliance
• Being ‘forced’ into a loveless marriage was partially what made Bellatrix so bitter, and she vowed never to have children and instead devoted herself entirely to Voldemort
• Despite fervently championing her family’s beliefs, she also had a rebellious streak, and refused to be a broodmare like other pure blood women, regarding it as something beneath her status as a female warrior
• Her hostile attitude towards traditional gender roles and motherhood made her an outcast amongst pure blood women, and she fell in deeper and deeper with male Death Eaters
• She didn’t have a single caring or nurturing bone in her body and was serious about sacrificing any hypothetical sons to the Dark Lord
• Voldemort gave her the attention her father never did, saw her as a truly brilliant witch superior to the men around her, and gave her free rein to unleash her frustration and rage
• She fell head over heels for Voldemort, partially in awe of his magical prowess and charming demeanor, and partially to spite her family for forcing her into a loveless marriage
• In her twisted mind, Voldemort also gave her a gateway to freedom, as no one else could ever tell her what to do with his protection, and Voldemort would never want his best lieutenant to be out of action due to pregnancy
• She was secretly jealous of Narcissa for marrying someone she loved, but also saw her as the only remaining sister and family she could confide in
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lostuntothisworld · 2 months ago
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Lilamoth's Rogue's gallery, a (very) rough draft fanfic premise
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I've been having so much fun coming up with oc’s for my crack theory that Lilamoth is collecting siblings (and they’re all Luka’s exes lmao). And yes, Lilamoth has successfully stolen 2/3 of their identities...
All three characters are sentimonsters, and their amoks are reconfigured Miraculous in the form of locking bracelets that cannot be removed, stolen long ago from the Native American Miracle Box, courtesy of Colt Fathom’s American weapons manufacturer and Tsurugi Industries.
All of the animals their Miraculous are based off of are known to attack and kill domestic cats… Make of that as you will :)
Due to Gabemoth making the Wish in a previous universe, the entire show of Miraculous is a 15 year time loop. All three children were once previous holders of the Ladybug Miraculous, and due to various reasons, failed to stop Gabemoth from making his Wish. With every Wish he made, the Ladybug holder was turned into a sentimonster in their subsequent Wish.
You can see how this all bodes for our Maribug…
Continued under the cut:
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Marina Verdi
Birthday: August 18, 2000 Chinese zodiac: Dragon Sun sign: Leo Decan: third/Aries (Mars) Moon sign: Aries Rising sign: Capricorn
First up we have Marina Verdi. She’s the girl who Lilamoth disguised herself as in the season 5 finale. Just like the disguise, she has a black bob haircut, ocean blue eyes, and wears a pair of glasses. She is half Chinese, and half Italian (like a certain polka-dotted hero…). In fact, she is actually the biological older sister of Marinette.
The Dupain-Chengs fell on hard times in their young marriage, due to Tom’s father disowning him because he married a Chinese woman. They were solicited by Tsurugi Industries to join an experimental fertility treatment for a sum of money. If the couple adopted out the subsequent child to an employee of Tsurugi Industries, they’d receive an additional lump sum of cash. The couple were eager to find out why they were having issues conceiving, so they made the decision to join the trial. Little did they know that Sabine would be implanted with a sentimonster embryo.
Sabine had an uneventful pregnancy, and delivered a healthy baby girl 9 months later. The baby was swiftly adopted by Mrs. Verdi, a single woman, and high ranking employee of Tsurugi Industries.
The child was named Marina, and her girlhood was a standard upper middle class one. She never met her biological parents, due to a waver the couple signed. Tom and Sabine invested the money they received from having her in a bakery located in a fashionable part of Paris. The bakery is still very successful, and considered one of the best in Paris.
Marina’s hobbies are video games, EDM, and computers. She loves school, learning, and is extremely smart, but is kind of snotty about it. She’s a bit of a lone wolf and has a sour disposition.
She has a gorgeous singing voice and was the original vocalist of Kitty Section before she and Luka broke up due to her being a jerk. Marina is cis and bisexual. She is currently in a devoted relationship with Shone. Shone is less of a pushover than Luka was, so it is a far less unbalanced relationship than the one she had with Luka. It also helps that they are much more compatible, and Marina is completely smitten with her girlfriend. They help each other be better people. Marina considers Shone her better half, and often calls Shone “her little bird” or “her quail” (French: “Mon petite oiseau”, and “Ma caille”—“ça caille” (short for the French word for coagulating) is slang for “it’s freezing”!)
Marina always attends Shone’s ballet and figure skating practice, and often writes music for her to dance or skate with.
Marina has a younger adoptive brother… Wayhem. There’s a reason we haven’t learned his last name yet. Wayhem is the biological younger brother of Lilamoth. It’s a long story… Marina and Wayhem don’t get along very well, as they are both headstrong and complete opposites. It doesn’t help that Wayhem insists on practicing his saxophone while Marina is trying to study.
Marina and Kagami form a friendship based off of quick witted banter and their love to throw shade, but Kagami sometimes thinks Marina goes too far. Shone is just happy Marina finally has a friend. Lilamoth is happy she has another Avenue of exploiting them all. Later on in the series, Marina also develops a surprising friendship with Nino due to their shared love of EDM.
Marina wields the Miraculous of the Coyote, and her theme color is a deep reddish gray color. I have yet to decide what her weapon is, but it’ll probably be some sort of pole weapon, like a scythe. Based off of several Native American myths where the coyote stole fire (or the sun) from the gods to give to humans, Her powers should be elemental and fire based. In some Native American folklore, coyotes are seen as beings of creation, and wildfires are often beneficial to the environment and help facilitate new growth. There’s probably some meta about how her biological father creates his livelihood with fire while baking. Fire also compliments Shone’s ice powers, which is just icing on the cake—pun intended.
Marina’s villain name is Cania.
Of the three, Marina has the second-most trouble coming to terms with being a sentimonster and being under Lilamoth’s and Tsurugi Industry’s thumbs. Despite her element, fire, she closes herself off and acts coldly to cope.
Marina’s civilian outfit is a black leather jacket, pink T-shirt, gray blue skinny jeans, and a pair of brown heeled leather lace up boots. Marina’s civilian outfit is inspired by Marinette’s pre-series 7th grade outfit she wears in her class photo in Reflekta and the episode Derision.
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Shone Bianca
Birthday: January 28, 2001 Chinese zodiac: Snake Sun sign: Aquarius Decan: first/Aquarius (Uranus) Moon sign: Pisces Rising sign: Libra
Shone Bianca is a strikingly elegant and beautiful girl. She has black blonde hair, which is usually pulled back in a bun, rich gray eyes, and fair skin. She is half Italian, and half German.
Her mother, Mrs. Bianca is an upper management employee of Audrey Bourgeois’ fashion empire. Mrs. Bianca married a rich corporate lawyer, and through her husband’s employer (either Tsurugi Industries or Colt’s warlord company. I haven’t decided which one yet), used a surrogate to have their eldest daughter Annalise.
Annalise can do nothing wrong in her parents’ eyes. She has excellent grades, is a talented ballet dancer, and has many friends. She’s currently working on a business degree at a prestigious university, which is fully sponsored by a scholarship through either Colt’s war empire or Tsurigi Industries. 
After a few years of raising young Annelise, Mr. And Mrs. Bianca decided to hire another surrogate for another baby. Little did they know, they actually hired someone to carry a sentimonster child. It was a fraught pregnancy with many health scares. Shone was born a premature sickly newborn and it put strain on the couple. In a chaotic series of events, it came out that Mr. Bianca had a mistress (Lilamoth’s biological mother… it’s a long story).
The couple separated. Mrs. Bianca blamed infant Shone for her failed marriage, and hired a revolving door of Nannies to take care of the child, all while doting immense amount of attention and care on Annelise.
Mrs. Bianca quickly hired another surrogate. This new baby would be her comeback baby. The surrogate had a boy, and Mrs. Bianca was over the moon. She named her darling baby boy Louis.
Annelise and Louis grew up close and were coddled by Mrs. Bianca, while Shone was ignored and ridiculed by her mother. Although her siblings are never outwardly cruel to Shone, she still feels like an outsider in her own family.
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The two character models I've chosen to be Annelise and Louis, courtesy of the episode "Qilin"
Like her older sister, Shone is an accomplished ballerina. She takes ballet from Aurélie Dupoint, and is in Chloe's class.
Although she loves ballet, Shone uses ballet as a means to cross train for her true passion: figure skating. She takes skating lessons from Philippe, and dreams of one day going to the Winter Olympics. Philippe insists she is ready, but Shone is still unsure.
Shone is close friends with Blonde Runner Girl with Prosthetic Legs, and Adrien. She was actually in a semi-successful relationship with Luka for a short time being, but due to her comphet, and both of their conflicting baggages, there were too many issues. They broke up messily, but it was for the best. Luka wishes nothing but the best for Shone.
Shone met Marina and realized she is a lesbian, and is much happier in her own skin. Shone supports Adrien with his own comphet, and is the first person he ever comes out as gay with.
Shone wields the miraculous of the Falcon. Her costume is white, and gray, with a tiny amount of gold. She “wears” gold pointe shoes to suggest the yellow feet of gyrfalcons, the bird her kwami and costume is based off of. I think her power should be elemental, and ice based, which mirrors Cania’s fire powers. Her weapon is a rope dart, that is sort of fashioned like a yo-yo.
Shone’s villain name is Odette.
Of the three, Shone has the most troubles coming to terms with being a sentimonster, and her life general, being under Lilamoth’s, and Tsurugi Industry’s thumbs. Despite her element, ice, she lashes out hotly in anger, and is impulsive to cope.
Shone’s civilian outfit is based off of PV Bridget, and Marinette’s season 6 outfit. She wears blue denim shorts with white lace trim, tights, a white blouse with pearl buttons, black jacket with white cuffs, and ballet flats. Shone's civilian outfit is this:
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Jean Duparc
Birthday: July 7, 2000 Chinese zodiac: Dragon Sun sign: Cancer Decan: Second/Scorpio (Pluto) Moon sign: Virgo Rising sign: Aquarius
Last up we have Jean Duparc. He is Lilamoth’s biological older twin brother. (It’s a long story…) His birth name is Mio DeAngelo, but his social worker insisted he change it to something more “French” in order to more appeal to potential adopters, as it is difficult enough to adopt out an 10 year old Romani child who was born in Tokyo, Japan (it’s a long story…) and was held back in school. (He started school late due to the issues with his home life making it difficult to attend, and he was held back in 7th grade, as he was having issues with his dyslexia.) Dispite all this, he enjoys learning, even if it’s more difficult for him than other children.)
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Jean in Marinette's 7th grade class during the flashback in Derision, and then Jean in Ms. Mendeleiv's 7th grade class in Reflekta
Odile Duparc recently dopted him, and Jean is quite fond of her. She is a bit of a scatterbrained mother, and has big dreams. It seems more like Jean is the parent at times, but the two are close.
Jean is a kind, sweet, but shy boy. He’s a bit has trouble forming bonds with people, due to his tumultuous young childhood. He briefly met Luka in a youth group home before he was adopted. The pair formed a friendship, and once got in trouble for sneaking out and going dumpster diving. They lost contact due to the fact that Luka’s mysterious father paid a prestigious lawyer to return Luka and Juleka back to their mother. (Luka and Juleka were taken away from Anarka unjustly, due to racism against their Romani heritage.)
Jean and Luka met by chance a few years later, and were in a sweet but short relationship. Luka doesn’t know why Jean broke it off, but respects his decision, even if it hurts. He wishes nothing but the best for Jean.
Jean is the holder of the Raccoon Miraculous and his weapon is a comically oversized kendama, which he uses as a giant hammer and battering ram. He is the heavy hitter of the trio. Not sure what his power should be, but probably some sort of variation of Uproar, as raccoons are known to be chaotic. Maybe when he activates his power, it causes and “event” that he has to figure out how to work in his favor, a bit like manipulating fate, to compliment the Ladybug’s lucky charm, as opposed to the Monkey’s power to disrupt powers.
Jean’s villain name is Hermes.
Unlike Marina and Shone, Jean quickly comes to terms with being a sentimonster. He also knows the kind of person his twin, Lilamoth is, and what to expect from her. His life has never been easy, so he’s used to being used and manipulated, but he still has issues with being Tsurugi Industry’s pawn, and does his best to protect Marina and Shone from the brunt of it.
In the previous universe where he was Ladybug, his Chat Noir was Felix, and they were deeply in love.
Unfortunately, their Miraculouses required a kiss to remove. And on top of that, they had to contend with secret identities.
During their finale battle between the pair and the Miracularized villains, the lovers shared their first and final kiss and traded Miraculous in order to best hide from the millions of scanners locked on their position.
They find and confront Gabemoth.
But Gabemoth has the upper hand and casts Voyage. He sends the new Cat holder to the surface of the sun.
Felix yo-yos a brace, and grabs Jean’s outstretched hand. But the gravitational pull was too great.
Jean’s hand slips from Felix’s.
Gabemoth Clouts Felix’s chest, launching the child across the crypt, and closes the portal
All that there is left of of Jean is the Black Cat ring clutched in Felix’s fingers.
Felix starts to stir. He has to combine the Ladybug and the Black cat to defeat Gabriel.
Gabemoth sends out an akuma to the ring.
“Tikki! Pla—AUGH!” The boy crumples to the ground.
It was child’s play after that. Gabemoth makes his Wish.
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callmewrinkles3 · 2 years ago
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Exclusive: Part Two From The Excerpts of Daniel Ricciardo’s Autobiography.
The Perth News, July 2035.
The former Formula One Champion talks about his wife, his family, and gives insights into his personal life like never before.
I know that everyone who reads this is more interested in my life and racing than in me praising my wife, but here’s the thing. She is my life. Her and our kids are my entire universe.
I’ve done some of the coolest things possible in my life. I’ve spent most of my adult life racing, I’ve driven the fastest cars in the world. I’ve sat into the ones that my heroes drove and driven them around the same racetracks they did. I went to hell and clawed my way back with Emma at my side and won a championship, but I can tell you that I’ve never felt as happy as the day I got to hold my kids for the first time. I’ve never been as proud as the day my wife brought our kids into the world and our family got a little bit bigger. But that’s a story for later. I’m going to tell you all about how much I love my kids in a few chapters, but before I do I need you to understand that they’re as amazing as their mother.
As I’ve been told countless times, everyone knows that we love each other. We’re the parents who are always holding hands at the school events, the ones that Lulu cringes about and tells her friends that “mama and dad keep kissing”. But the world doesn’t know everything that Em has done. They don’t know the things she’s sacrificed for me - her privacy, her solitude, her ability to walk down the street alone. That’s why I need to tell the world how wonderful she is. That’s why there’s some things you should know about my wife.
She is the coolest. Nobody in the world is as cool as her, not even me. She doesn’t believe in God, but she does believe in the power of Taylor Swift to solve world problems. She loves art, history, museums, and castles. And she brings me to a new one no matter where we are in the world. She loves crime shows and knows so much about true crime it’s almost scary. She can tell you which episode of Criminal Minds you’re watching from a single frame, and I can confirm that Penny wasn’t named after Penelope Garcia, but we did think about doing that.
She loves shiny things and Legos, and still says her best Christmas present was a Lego flower set we spent Christmas 2020 making together. She’d rather eat homemade food than dine at a Michelin Star restaurant, and she’s the sole reason we don’t have breakfast for dinner every day. She is the sweetest, strongest, most loving woman in the world. She is the most patient person I know. When we became parents we promised we wouldn’t yell at our kids, and our kids have never heard her raise her voice in anger. I know they never will.
She’s so smart and bright and I call her a genius at least once a day because it’s true. I wasn't going to mention this because it's not my place to say, but Em said I can. She's autistic. We found out after we got married, and a lot of things just slipped into place about her and our relationship. It's not a bad thing. It's not a negative. Her brain just works differently to mine, and she sees things I never would. It's one of the things I love her for, not in spite of it. But it's part of why the rumours and crap said about her hurt so much. Her brain picks up the patterns that everyone else misses and without her I would have been completely blindsided in Hungary in 2022. She was the first one to realise there was a chance for a seat in 2023.
She’s loyal beyond comprehension. She will never spill a secret if you ask her to keep it. She lights up a room as soon as she walks in. She’s so funny it’s unbelievable even though she insists she’s not. She gives the best hugs (as voted by our family) and kisses (as voted by me) in the world. She loves crocheting things and used to travel around the world with yarn and her hooks to make stuffed animals. Each one of our kids has a blanket that she made, and she made one big enough for me.
Every single thing she’s achieved in life is because she worked so fucking hard for it. Em has built herself up from the ashes more times than any person should, and more times than anyone I know could. She rebuilt us and me brick by brick when any other person would have walked away and nobody would have blamed them. And then she’s the reason we built up our family of five and she’s the one who keeps our family going. She’s the heart and soul of this family. She loves being a mum, and she was made to be one. She loves our kids - and somehow me because I’m a lucky, lucky man - more than anything or anyone in the world. She deserves everything in this world and the day we got together I made it my job to make it possible.
She’s the sweetest woman in the world and she couldn’t hurt a fly even if she tried. She’s selfless to a painful degree and trying to explain she can be selfish felt impossible. She still isn’t. She’s the kind of person who remembers everyone’s birthdays and has cards and a cake. She asks how everyone is because she really worries. She’ll stay sitting listening to you ramble for hours, even if it’s about things that she has no interest in or doesn’t understand because she knows it means something to you. She let me talk about wine, I made it my mission to create one that she’d drink and I did it.
Emma Ricciardo is the woman who puts everyone else first. She’s been willing to do things that make her life worse in so many ways because she thinks it’ll be easier for other people. She puts her wants and needs behind everyone else’s, and no matter what she still does. It’s just one of the reasons I always put her first in life because she won’t put herself first. You know the thing on flights, put your own mask on before helping others? Emmy doesn’t do that. She helps everyone else first.
She makes the hard days easier. During the worst time in our lives when I could barely get out of bed to go to work she was the one who made the noise go away. She’d wrap me in her arms because it was the one place I felt I wasn’t tearing myself apart. She drove me to and from the McLaren MTC and waited around Woking for me because she knew I needed her. She’s the only person who could ever quiet that overactive, anxious voice in my head. She still is.
And on top of that she’s fucking gorgeous. I know I’m biased, but have you seen her? She’s beautiful inside and out and Milo is so lucky he looks like his Mama. Don’t get me wrong, our girls are beautiful because they look like me but Milo got to take after Em and I love that we have her mini me too. She’s this tiny little British crazy woman who can verbally kick anyone’s ass but smiles like a child when songs she likes come on the radio. She grins at me and I forget what I was saying. I can’t count how many times I forgot what I was talking about during an interview in the paddock. I know there’s YouTube compilations of me losing my train of thought, and I can confirm any of them after mid 2018 were because I saw her.
I can’t count the amount of times my brain went blank and I stopped listening to whatever anyone was asking me, simply because I saw her passing by. She would walk anywhere in my eyesight with Blake and Michael and I could recognise her no matter how far away she was. And then my brain turned into a mess of rainbows, hearts, and glitter. That’s how terribly in love with her I am. She grins and her nose wrinkles and I remember seeing her in that kitchen and wanting to kiss her. It’s how she got her instagram username, I started calling her Wrinkles that night.
I seriously don’t know how I got so lucky. I’ve tried working out how but in the nearly twenty years since we met I still don’t know. Somehow the strongest and most beautiful woman in the world agreed to marry me and call me her husband and let me call her my wife and my baby mama, and I still don’t understand it. She loves me and more than that she likes me, and how cool is that?
I could go on for this entire book to talk about all the things I love about her but I’ll keep most of that to myself to get to the point. There’s a really small circle of people who are lucky to be liked by her. You should feel lucky if Emmy calls you her friend. But there’s this even tinier circle of people who Em actually loves, and if you’re in that one you can call yourself a blessed cunt. If you’re in that very closed circle you know exactly what I’m talking about, and you also know that there’s absolutely nothing that woman won’t do to protect the people she loves.
When I tell you that, what I really mean is she will become lethal. If you mess with the people who she loves, Em turns into a different person who will rain destruction on you. I always say that she turns into Mama Badger, and she calls me a silly and kisses my nose, but it’s true. It’s very rare and I’ve seen it a few times since I met her, but the worst was the last time she publicly turned into Mama Badger. Why?
Because she gets mad when you mess with anyone in that very small circle of people she loves. But guess what happens when someone messes with and publicly betrays the one she loves the most in the world?
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prongsmydeer · 1 year ago
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Ayesha Liveblogs Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story
The opening credits are beautiful, I'll give them that
"I know that no one who looks like you or me has ever married one of these people, ever." Bridgerton: Now Even More Suspicious When It Comes to Depictions of Race
Even permitting for the thirteen children, Queen Charlotte seems pretty neutral about her granddaughter's [redacted] LOL
"Very brown. Thoughts?" Me walking into parties in high school
Not Lady Danbury's Crypt Keeper-ass husband removing his teeth to sleep
"Lord Danbury. Imagine." [Tensely] "I am imagining." Lady Danbury knows that a title needs an heir
"You may be too beautiful to marry me. People will talk, given that I am a troll." George is handsome to the point of distraction
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"Either way, the choice is entirely up to her." I know it's like bare minimum but I do appreciate George reinforcing Charlotte's autonomy in the matter of their marriage
Charlotte changing outfits is fun for two reasons 1) That she is showing that she will be her own woman as Queen and 2) The superstition around seeing the bride in her dress before the wedding
Honestly, honestly. Get u a man who will bequeath u an investment property and give u ur space whenever you want it.
"Do we not spend this night together? My governness said that is what happens on our wedding night." [Pregnant pause] "Fine. I shall stay." What is George's deal? Surely even the pretense of consummation is necessary?
George from Bridgerton 🤝Derek from Swan Princes: How to Offend Women in Five Syllables or Less
Charlotte does not mince words for her Virgin and Whore Adult Children:
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"Your father and I made 15 royal babies all by ourselves. I do not see why the whole lot of you cannot make just one." Mad props for surviving 15 rounds of childbirth in Georgian England
Say what you will about Charlotte's currently loveless marriage, at least she's eating good food
HAHAHAH we finally get gay characters in this show and it's Five Steps Behind Brimsley and There's Nothing Wrong With His Bits Other Guy
Justice for Benedict and Eloise, who are bisexual and lesbian to meeee
"I do not know a single soul here except for you. I'm completely alone, and you prefer the sky to me." Even if George refuses to be a husband to Charlotte, he can at least be a friend
"What if he puts another one of his gigantic babies inside me?" Am I to take this as Lady Danbury has living children or nah
George sending Charlotte a dog is another green flag
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Thank God for Lady Danbury, no one will ever tell the Bridgerton women what sex is when they ought to
"But it can be such a pleasure." "Or it can be a painful, lifelong sentence." Danbury vs. Bridgerton: Marriage dichotomy edition
"I do not like the part where my head hits the wall over and over again. Is there a way to avoid that?" "Yes, there is a way to avoid that." George said: I want to be on bottom 🥰
George said: I am about to ruin the energy of our whole marriage in less than a minute
Is the King's tremor meant to represent his already being in the midst of his disease? :((
"Mother was going on and on to all the ladies at tea that their love means we now live in an unnatural society." Violet's mum said: The energy of this show isn't rank enough, time to be racist
Violet's dad calling her both Beauty and Brains as she asks questions 💝I love him
"So they are exactly like us. Better in some cases considering that several of them are from royal families of their own, and have much more money than we do." Violet said: I'm an ally
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HAHAHAH George and Charlotte working out their issues in classic Bridgerton style, via sex montage
"It would be difficult for you to hear about the Queen being with child long after the fact, would it not?" Lady Danbury said: I will go to ANY length to avoid spending time with my husband (fair)
"I planned some correspondence that I need to write, so the time was useful." Agatha, Master of Dissassociation
Not Mama Ledger dissing the Tween Mozart LMAO
"I told you that I enjoy science. Part of that science is agriculture. I enjoy farming." "So King George is... Farmer George?" There's the Farmer George I've heard so much about
"Why do you not understand that you hold our fates in your hands?" Something something the distance from the nobility to the class it rules something something labour from women of colour (and specifically Black women) something something Bridgerton bringing up the outward dynamics of racial inequity while refusing to interrogate the fact Nearly Every Single Black Female Character of Significance AND Simon Has Had Their Reproductive Autonomy Taken Away (Simon's mother, Marina, Lady Danbury, Queen Charlotte)
Shout-out Brimsley and NWWHB (Nothing Wrong With His Bits) for being my emotional support background couple
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"You can be a person with me." George and Charlotte uniting over their common understanding of their duty to support the nation ❤️
Lady Danbury and Lord Ledger ending racism one dance at a time
"Thank you." "You never have to thank me. We are a team." This line would've absolutely KILLED IT had it not been for the fact that Voltron already used this line in 2018, in a more emotionally substantive context (Shout-out my boy Shiro)
Not Lady Danbury and her homie Coral giggling and hugging because Lord Danbury is deceased (good for them)
Flhkfjhfkjhf Lady Danbury's 'Sorry I offended you about your dead husband, mine sucked,' tea is a social event on its own
"I was in the sky, but now I am going inside. Into Buckingham House." Charlotte immediately understanding that she needs to work within George's delusions :(
"Tell me, what would the people prefer: A royal baby, or cheap bread?" These principles do make for a good ruler, it is a shame about The Illness
"You command an entire kingdom. You can command yourself." George said: Friendship ended with early-onset neurological dysfunction, now personal affirmations are my best friend
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(I really hope someone has done fanart from this ep with George and that meme 'I am no longer mentally ill')
Tfjfjhfjfhf imagine if instead of finding me the right meds for my nerve pain, my doctor just slapped me in the face and told me to get a hold of myself. Georgian England Medicine do be rough
"Her perfection is matched only by my deformity." Fuck. I did not anticipate how deeply Farmer George's story would hit from a place of like. Self-imposed exclusion due to living in a broken body. But damn
Did it really take until four episodes in for NWWHB aka the King's Man aka Brimsley's boyfriend aka Reynolds to get a name?
I am enjoying the retrospective on all of these events from George's side of things
"And just like an animal, I will break you." I no longer enjoy the retrospective on George's side of things
It really is the Ultimate Gesture that he's getting tortured so he can get be well enough to know his wife
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If nothing else, the King has a solid homie in Reynolds
Really fair of Charlotte to be upset to be uninformed of what George was going through, but brutal that he's going back to Doctor Mon(ster)ro
"Do you suppose the Queen ever seeks...?" Omg I wouldn't expect Violet to be so saucy
Why are all the middle-aged women rising from their beds in the night is this going to be like that Glee song where everyone simultaneously discovers masturbation
"Loneliness is a battle even queens must fight for themselves." Penelope Featherington, somewhere: I gotta make fun of the Queen for having a mentally-ill husband
I'm pretty sure this captioning is incorrect, and what George is saying is, "Doctor! Doctor!" and not "Torture! Torture!" But both are accurate I suppose
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Hahahaha not to add insult to injury for Violet, but Lady Danbury made eye contact with Violet's dad at Lord Danbury's funeral like she was thinking he was beekeeping age
"It's not surprising you should mourn him, he was your husband." You don't have to like someone to feel weird that they're dead
"I was three when my parents promised me. When a deal was struck. Three years old. So, I was raised to be his wife." Agatha's parents said have you heard of grooming? We have brought it down to a science
The People of Colour in Nobility raise fair points about succession
"I am sorry to report that she remains alive and well, Your Majesty." Brimsley said treason is allowed if it's funny
"Paint her skin lighter. Pale. His Majesty wants her to glow." 70% of fanart for any given fandom LMAO (also shout-out to the real world contention around images of Queen Charlotte)
"I will see you here tomorrow. Same time. You will wear better shoes. We can ramble together." I KNEWWWW there was some eye contact going on [Agatha as Animatronic Fox voice] I'm gonna fuck your dad, Violet
"Your garden is in bloom." "It is blooming out of control." It IS going to be like that scene from Glee
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"Georgie, be a good boy and approve your brothers' marriages." "...I approve." The Princes forgot that there is one power that trumps even the monarchy: Being a mama's boy
"Your body is not your own." Welcome 2 having a uterus
At least Aldophus would be willing to intervene if his sister were in physical danger
"Rambles are there." "Rambles are there." "I am there." This would be so romantic if it were not directed at her future friend's dad LMAO
Agatha, somewhere in the present: My garden bloomed for your father once, Violet
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"The hard part is done," said Princess Augusta, as if being married to a person losing grip on themselves for the remainder of their life is not a hard part
There is something that feels like empathy about Augusta saying that Charlotte never has to see her husband again, even if it's immediately followed by the clarification they could need another heir
Brimsley reaching out to Charlotte but unable to reach her due to Georgian social graces
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I do feel for Reynolds, in his being caught and unable to do anything to help his partner or his friend/King
It is funny that we have not once seen Agatha interact with her children, given how family oriented the main plot of the show is. Historically accurate, mayhaps, but omg
"What do any of the women of the ton know of true friendship?" Agatha said: FRIENDSHIP IS FOR MEN AND THE POOR
"We are untold stories. And yesterday, you told me something of your story. And I, thank you." "You are most welcome." I love Lady Bridgerton and Lady Danbury's friendship ❤️
"It did not bloom until after he was gone." With your dad, Violet!
"I want to be gardened as much as possible." Violet said: Now that I have found my libido, I am open for business
Dominic Danbury is sooo cute I want a million more scenes of the world's tiniest noble:
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I do love how they give specific context to what royal connections the Danbury family has in Sierra Leone, rather than leaving their noble connections in ambiguity
I know Charlotte's the queen but damn imagine having someone who has just stationed their whole business in your drawing room before you got home
"Where will Your Majesty go?" "Why, I have come here." Charlotte said: Be a pal and commit treason with me, Agatha
Agatha and Charlotte deciding to start their friendship sincerely 💗I love women
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"I'm afraid." "Afraid of what?" "That I will not be able to love her." "Love is not a thing one is able or not able to do based on some magic. Some chemistry. That is for plays. Love is determination. Love is a choice one makes." Charlotte said: Love is companionship, William
"And these youthful fits shall become mere embarrassing memories." 1) Adolphus, you say this with the slightest bit of context as to why Charlotte left and 2) Not a good time to use the word 'fits,' it's a sensitive topic
"And I am not... coming inside." Finally the prophecy of dad fucking is fulfilled
Charlotte said: That's enough of this medical malpractice
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You know, I didn't really keep a good count of Agatha's kids. Are there four already or does she potentially give birth to her homie's half-sibling LMAO
Also: It is deeply weird that Papa Ledger's method of hitting on people is the birthday hat he also makes for his daughter
Violet has now found the birthday hat; to be expected but unfortunate for all involved. Does she think it was her husband or does she know it was her dad?
"I see them. Do you not?" Brimsley is ride or die for Charlotte 4ever
"I love you. From the mo... from the moment I saw you trying to go over the garden wall, I have loved you desperately. I cannot breathe when you are not near. I love you Charlotte. My heart calls your name. I wanted to tell you. I wanted you to know." COMMUNICATION
I love the double meaning in the last two lines, because it bridges right into him telling her about his condition so it's both "I wanted to tell you (that I love you)," and "I wanted to tell you (that I have been bearing this)."
"Perhaps one day [Violet] will have an unimpeachable reputation. Just like yours." I think this is how Papa Ledger has chosen to break up with Agatha
"I do not remember names. I am female." Me when I lie
"You do not know us. Any of us. You do not learn about us. You do not care for what we care for." Generational trauma: Royal edition
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"They will be together, have a marriage, grow old as one. We would serve them together." "A lifetime." Gay marriage: Royal aide edition
"Losing a husband is... inconvenient." Augusta said: Sorrows, sorrows, prayers
"I will not engage with the princess. I've promised the Queen friendship." Agatha said: Loyal homies before royal homies
"Brimsley. Have you any family? Did you never marry?" Incredible that after approximately 30 years, Charlotte has not once asked Brimsley about his personal life. Oh, rich people
Lady Danbury is too honourable to ask Charlotte for help, even though she needs help with title succession :(
"I have loved and been loved. And that is all I shall say." Lady Danbury said: I will never admit to sleeping with your dad, Violet
"There is womanly work afoot." HAHAHA me when I want a man to leave
Were I Charlotte, I would not take kindly to the horse comparison, no matter how helpful it was
"And over the years, I learned I need not be content to surrender myself to the uselessness of female pursuits. Instead, I secured my son as King." Augusta said: Crying is for women, we are politicians
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You know, all this talk of Parliament has suddenly reminded me how anachronistic George's haircut is. I wonder if he will finally put on a wig
"You have been an admirable adversary thus far. Our battles bring me satisfaction. So this, will not do. You are not allowed to come here and sob. You may not quit. Cover your bruises and endure. Do not lose control of your fate, Agatha." HAHAHAHA I can't believe Augusta is giving Agatha a pep talk and a shot of alcohol mid-title negotiation. That's mentorship
"I am sorry." Is George hiding under the bed? LMAO
Update from ten seconds later: He is
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Sometimes, love is not about who will pull you out from beneath the bed, but who will get under the bed with you
"Not a full me. Not a full marriage. Only half. Half a man. Half a king. half a life." "If what we have is half, then we shall make it the very best half." 💘Oh Charlotte
I know Agatha doesn't NEED to marry a Prince, but I think it'd be fun if she did
"I will not say words with hearts and flowers, because I know you are not a hearts and flowers woman. But there is something here. Between us. I believe we could be happy together." Yet another marriage of companionship about to be tossed over for passion. Why does no one on this show what to marry someone who simply wants to provide them a life of kindness!!! (I know in Agatha's case, Lord Ledger is also kind, but not kind enough not to cheat on his wife and introduce his daughter to his mistress. Soooooo)
Why do they cut to the back-and-forth between invitation and sex like it is necessary preparation for the ball hahahhaa
George is representing a very real mental health experience of when you spend a long time in your house and then you experience like mild agoraphobia when you have to be outside again
Literally no one at this ball has hair like George LMAO. But why am I seeking anything historical in the Shonda Rhimes Cinematic Universe:
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"I cannot marry you, but only because I cannot marry anyone." I respect this position if it's coming from a point of independence rather than for a different man. I love her regaining agency over the direction of her life!
HOWEVER. HOWEVER. AGATHA. GIRL. YOU HAVE NO INCOME. WILD OF YOU TO DENY ALL SAFETY NETS FOR YOUR SURVIVAL
"You make him happy. Thank you, your Majesty." This is the closest thing to a compliment Charlotte will ever receive from her mother-in-law
This show is pretty bittersweet, given all that we know becomes of the Queen and King in the future
Shout-out to Brimsley and Reynold's relationship for being the saving grace of this show
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Hahahaha Charlotte finally gets her one (1) legitimate grandchild after 50 ones that she does not care to know about
"I only did not wish to place my burdens on top of your own." Agatha 💞
"I suggest your shift your fear into faith and come to us with your concerns directly. To do otherwise would suggest we are incapable of addressing them." Charlotte is such a good Queen
Charlotte said: Your mum WAS right about my child-bearing hips!
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"I believe you should leave the hats where they are. They are lovely. As you say, cheerful." This is as close as Lady Danbury will come to acknowledging the dad-fucking
GEORGE NOW BEING THE ONE TO JOIN CHARLOTTE UNDER THE BED. THEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
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"Your line will live on." "Our line." "Our line." Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
The splicing between the young version of George and Charlotte and their younger selves. This is really getting to my heart.
"You did not go over the wall." "No George, I did not go over the wall." I'M GOING TO CRY, THIS IS MY FAVOURITE OF THE BRIDGERTON SEASONS 😭😭😭 ROMANCE!!
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broidobe · 2 days ago
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3, 7, 8, and 10 for the asks
answers below the cut
3 ~ playlists
oh god i have so many playlists lmfao. so i'll name every single one ;)
the main one i listen to is called innocent school girl mix and it's every single metal song i listen to with some other songs that just fit the playlist
and then i have 9 playlists that are separated by genre of metal. i have death, black, deathcore/metalcore, goregrind (and really any other grind), slam, melodeath, nu metal, doom (called whimsical asf 😭), and to top it off an entire playlist dedicated to wifey, alissa white-gluz
i have one called divorced dad that is really all the rock music i listen to. i have an ethel cain playlist also.
one that i never thought i'd reveal to the public is one called twinks. it is full of 5sos and 1d... cause i've been a fan since i was 4. somethings just never die down.
i have one called oldies that is filled with old hollywood broadway music and classics in general. don't hate lol
i have one called wyoming territory that is country. once again, don't hate. i like never listen to it and i promise i'm cool
there's one called punky which is pretty self explanatory, it's punk. theres hell yeah which is...chappell roan, sabrina carpenter, charli xcx, the dare, you get it.
i have emo which is basically just the emo trinity (marry me frank iero). i have mcr and fall out boy and i used to have a p!atd one but why have a playlist for just two albums?
also one for the cure cause...robert smith rocks. please listen to high by the cure, you won't regret it. best cure song ever
and finally, big minge energy. i mentioned it on my blog once but it's midwestern emo with weezer because i thought they worked well together. specifically pinkerton though
7 ~ celeb crushes
okay theres a lot.
my number one forever has been duff mckagan. i saw him for the first time when i was 4 and my mom says my eyes widened so much she thought they'd fall out. what can i say? i'm just cool like that.
but soon after my king ashton irwin followed. i'm a pretty diehard 5sos fan and uhhh...ashton stole my heart right away. that sexy ass aussie can take me away any day.
i saw frank iero at a young age too and fell in love. he's just so fucking cool.
i first knew i was bisexual when i saw pamela anderson. that woman...holy shit. more on her in my next post cause someone asked if i've met celebrities.
and james hetfield. my dearest angel boo boo bear sweetheart babygirl.
let me list some ladies:
gabbriette
angelina jolie
issa rae (GIVE ME HER)
pheobe dynevor
kylie bunbury
megan fox
BEYONCÉ (THE REAL WIFE, BEEN A FAN SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME)
solange
sharon tate
rosie hw
karen mulder
brigitte bardot
alissa white-gluz
now for the men:
slash
robert smith
bill hader (FIGHT ME)
john mulaney (FIGHT ME)
luke hemmings
michael clifford
calum hood
PHIL BOZEMAN UGH OMG. I NEED YOU
mick thomson (daddy issues strike again)
peter steele (daddy issues strike once again) (and size kink)
sid wilson
PETE MOTHERFUCKING WENTZ. HE'S AN OG TOO
AND THE WAY BROTHERS (MIKEY OMG YOU BITCH I LOVE YOU)
oh god there are so many more guys.
8 ~ languages
i am a PROUD polyglot. i speak six lanugages, 4 fluently. my first language is english but i started learning russian at a really young age, as that's what is spoken at my house 50% of the time
once i was pretty good at russian, my mom started teaching me finnish and let me tell you, not a fun ride. i got it so confused with russian and i sucked at it. now that i'm older, i'm way better though.
i am fluent in those languages and dutch. i learned dutch because some of my family hails from nijmegen which is like the most beautiful place on earth. i'm happy to say i was actually born there. but i stayed there for like a month before leaving.
i speak a decent amount of norwegian and french but there's still a lot of grammar mistakes i make. and that's it!
obviously, as russian, finnish, etc. aren't my first languages, it's likely i'll make SOME SORT of grammar mistake lol.
if you're lazy and didn't want to read that, here's a list
fluent:
english
russian
finnish
dutch
decent amount:
french
norwegian
also i absolutely love getting messages or asks in different lanugaes so if you speak them, don't be afraid to talk to me in that language.
10 ~ fav book
this is a hard one. i'd have to say a little life by hanya yanagihara or don't want you like a bestfriend by emma alban.
i'm a pretty avid reader but those happen to be my favourite, right now at least.
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elliebyrrdwrites · 9 months ago
Text
Dramione blurb 9.25
DRACO
“Your face is infuriating?” Harry repeated Draco’s errant words back to him. Except, when Harry regurgitated them, the words were fizzing with repressed laughter.
“Don’t,” Draco pushed through clenched teeth.
He hadn’t planned what he had intended to say to her. But Harry had suggested he try telling her, with words not provoked by a cursed crystal orb, how he felt.
He had tried to roll with it. Clearly, he hadn’t mapped out what he would say. He simply spoke the very first thing that came to mind.
Hermione's face is infuriating because he loved it. Every bit of it was fascinating and expressive. It was infuriating because he wanted to touch it. Endlessly. With his hands, with his lips. With his fucking eyes.
Draco looked around at the field they had apparated into. It was green and brown, full of wet grass and mud. The air was still damp and gray, the sun barely peeking over the horizon behind them. About 50 meters away, stood a campsite.
It reminded Draco of the display of tents during the Quidditch World Cup of 1994.
But, clearly, on a smaller scale. There were probably about 15 tents set up and all of them were still and quiet with what he assumed were their sleeping occupants.
Harry stepped in front of him and lifted a brow at him.
“I just.” Draco sighed and rolled his eyes. “I said the first thing that came to my mind and really, she is incredibly infuriating. You know, she’s your best friend.”
Harry ran a hand into his hair, gripping the messy hair between his fingers. “You are really terrible at this.” He lowered his arm to give Draco a look that was bordering on pity.
“Oh,” Draco scoffed. “Like you’re one to talk.” He pushed past his partner and began to inspect the area they stood in. The mud was sticking to the bottoms of their shoes and from the looks of it, it was a frequented spot.
“Hate to break it to you, Malfoy, but I am not currently single and pining after the woman I’ve been in love with since school. I’m actually engaged to her.”
“Right.” Draco sniffed, still inspecting the different types of footprints pressed deep into the mud. “And you failed to agree on a date to get married to her.”
“I picked the date, actually.”
“As a farce.” He shook his head and scowled at Harry. “Which by the way, you did in order to trick Granger into being in the same room as her ex. Why?”
Harry’s grin dissolved. “Right, well.” He rolled his shoulders back. “That was mainly Ginny’s thing.”
“But do you want them to get back together?”
“It’s not about what I want. It’s about what they want.” They stood for a moment in the mud, eyes tracking their surroundings, before Harry spoke again. “Look, there’s a lot of history there between them.”
“Clearly.” Draco recalled the way she looked being held in Weasley’s hands. The comfortable way her shoulders relaxed under his kiss. Perhaps Draco really didn’t have a right to be pushing his way into her life. They had only been broken up for a month. If he was to have any chance at...finding a place of his own then surely she would need some time to get over whatever it is they had.
Unless, of course, she never did.
“But,” Harry added as he stepped over a particularly deep track in the mud. He crouched down to observe it closer. “Looks odd, doesn’t it?”
Draco nodded, eyeing it from where he stood. It looked a bit like the bristle end of broom was dug into the muck and dragged through.
“There’s clearly some unresolved...tension between you two. I think she’s felt very strongly about the matter this entire time.”
“What makes you say that?”
Harry stood and pulled out a strange little rectangular box. “She had an interesting reaction when I told her you were my new partner.”
Draco’s eyes drifted up, from the object to Harry’s face. The man didn’t elaborate, despite the intense stare Draco bestowed upon him.
Harry returned his attention back to the rectangular object. Positioning it to face the track in the mud, he pressed a button on the top.
“What is that?”
“It’s a digital camera.”
“Digital…” He paused at the word camera. “It’s muggle. Pictures that don’t move.” Harry nodded.
“You be the Garda Siochana?” A woman’s voice, thick and ragged asked from behind them.
They both turned to find a woman with brown hair, streaked with white. Her eyes, bloodshot as they were, shone golden brown against the early morning light breaking through the haze. Her face was round and pale.
Regardless, Draco saw the resemblance to their victim.
“We are.” Harry tucked his camera back into a charmed pocket inside of his coat. “Can you please tell us who is responsible for Belinda Giles?”
The woman’s mouth pushed to one side, her cheek puffing up on one side. “Aye. That would be me.”
Draco cleared his throat, suddenly overwhelmed with the idea of speaking to her himself. Speaking to the victims of murders was Harry’s job. He didn’t fuck everything up the way Draco does. Still, he had to ensure he got the answers he wanted.
“Are you her mother?” Draco asked. He wondered why she wasn’t the one to come to the ministry to report her daughter missing.
She nodded her head and Draco watched as her eyes slid to the wet, green grass field beside them.
“Mrs. Giles, could you tell us about the last time you saw your daughter?” Harry asked, his voice gentle. So unlike Draco’s.
“Call me Fiadh.” She turned and started walking toward the tiny village of tents. “Come inside, lads. I won’t be talking out here. There’s a devil in the grass there.”
Draco and Harry exchanged a look before they followed Fiadh Giles into her charmed tent.
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harmonyckrs · 10 months ago
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DAY 9 in Twisted Strangetown: The Goth in Disguise
THE PREVIOUS DAY
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H: Hello, lovely! Harper Morgan at your service. How may I help you?
A: Oh, shoot, I'm sorry. I was calling for my brother.
H: AKTU? Where have you been for the past year? Are you okay? And why wouldn't you answer any of our calls?
A: I'm more confused on why you're referring to yourself as "Harper" with your wife's maiden name.
H: You're dodging the question!
A: Okay, fine! I'm being held captive by SCIA.
???: We're not holding you captive. You're here because we need answers on how you were able to reverse the mind control. We need that information to save everyone else in Strangetown.
H: Save Strangetown from what, darling? They all seem fine to me!
A: Hamza, stop speaking like that.
???: There's an unknown force that's caused everyone's personalities to be set to the extreme, alongside giving them "brain fog" that we recently discovered that made them unable to recall past events and think for long periods of time. Things seem okay now, but there have been cases of the past of these extremities causing people to attack others.
H: Ooh, I get it! So we're preventing something worse from happening, right?
???: Precisely.
H: Well, I'll be more than happy to talk to you, love! In exchange, you can let my dear brother go free. How about that?
???: Depends on what you can provide.
H: Provide, huh? Oh, I can provide much more than you think...
A: Hamza, you're married.
H: Celeste said that it's okay to seduce people for money or power as long as I tell her first! And I hold the same rule to her, too!
???: Well, we'll see. What time works for you?
H: I can actually come by right now, dear! Just...give me some time to get ready, okay?
???: Got it. I'll send you the location. Be quick.
*Beep*
H: Can't believe I have to put everything back on...
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NAME: HAMZA "HARPER MORGAN" TERRESTRIAL
AGE: ADULT
STATUS: ALIVE, FUNCTIONAL
I am unsure which of the two names was Harper's real name, but she seemed neutral for both so I assume it's a good idea to continue to refer to her as Harper.
Harper claimed to reside in Bluewater Village, but was temporarily residing in Strangetown for reasons she would not specify. She lives with her two kids, one of which was the product of an alien abduction and both of whom attend private school.
When I questioned Harper about "Celeste," the woman she had mentioned in the recording, she claimed that I misremembered and that she was single. She then proceeded to flirt with me as if she would forget, before I threatened to tell Aktu about what happened. This prompted her to confess that she did have a wife, and that the two were in an open relationship. I may have to confirm this with Aktu later, though I'm unsure if this information is important.
Harper followed this up by talking more about her wife, entering a long tangent about how amazing she was and how she was so lucky to find someone "out of her league." Once she was done, she then told me that there were rumors of gadgets being built in Strangetown that could potentially allow people to mind control others without possessing any supernatural powers.
This would likely mean that the town-wide control is the product of a haywire experiment. And there is one guy in town who already has a track record of haywire experiments that negatively affect the entire town - Loki Beaker. The good news is that Chloe and Lola were already at their place for observations, so I can simply ask them to bring him here.
Once our conversation concluded, Harper and I agreed to let Aktu go on the condition that he wore a tracking device in case we needed to locate him again. Aktu seemed okay with this, and the two of them returned to Bluewater with no complaints.
This concludes our first interrogation. It's time for us to collect our next suspect!
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THE NEXT DAY
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sissytobitch10seconds · 11 months ago
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My Delicate Love
Fandom: Bridgerton (TV) Summary: He should be focused on his complicated feelings for Kate Sharma and his failed marriage to Edwina Sharma. He should be focused on the books for the estate he inherited too early. Instead, all he can think about is his daughter. Warnings: Parent death, mpreg, carrierverse, breach birth, birth, and complicated family dynamics Word Count: 7,625 Ship(s): Anthony Bridgerton & Hyacinth Bridgerton
Archive link!
A/N: On this week's episode of me writing whatever the fuck I want: Anthony Bridgerton mpreg. I hope you guys enjoy, this fic gave me brainrot for literally weeks! Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3
Anthony let the packet of papers that he was meant to be going through fall back down onto the desk. He had really been letting things get away from him recently, but he wasn’t sure that was directly his fault. He felt bogged down with everything that had happened recently, so it was hardly out of the question for him to be distracted.
He had tried to trick himself into thinking that it was a good idea to propose to the wrong woman simply because she was the Diamond of the Season, picked by their rather fickle queen. He didn’t love Edwina, but he had tried to cut his heart off from loving people not long after his father’s death and the events that had followed. He had let Siena in and then she had proven why that was a bad idea, he had tried to let Kate in and then fumbled it so badly that it felt as though everyone in the world hated him for it.
He turned his head to look out of the window next to the desk in his office. This time, as his gaze made the journey, he let it travel over every single thing in the room. He usually skipped all of it so that he could focus on the ever changing nature of the land outside of their ancestral estate. It made him too sad to think about what his father had done while sitting in the very place that Anthony was currently residing.
Along the wall that held the grand fireplace, barren because of the mid-summer heat, sat the painting that Anthony had hung there many years ago but never once properly looked at. He had kept up the portrait of his father that his mother had threatened to get rid of just after the funeral. It was the last portrait that he had ever sat for, the singular one where his wife or children were not also with him. It was a fond memory, the father that he remembered captured in every brushstroke so that he could look back on the man fondly. Every memory that he had outside of the portrait itself had been tainted by his father’s death.
---
“Come on, Anthony. Surely pregnancy isn’t slowing you down that badly,” Edmund jested lightly as they finished walking out of the forest and onto the neatly trimmed grass of the green. 
“I think that you would feel the same if you had something the size of a chamber pot strapped to your body, Father,” Anthony replied bitterly. The entire pregnancy had put him in a sour mood, even though he knew that he had it better than most men in his situation.
The landscape for carriers had improved greatly in the last hundred or so years, ever since the eldest of King George I sons had been found out to be one. It was still considered shameful to fall pregnant when not married, but it was actually legal for two men to marry now so that children could be considered to be legitimate. In conservative and traditional circles, even married carriers were considered with about the same level and class as women that worked as actresses or musicians.
Anthony had played around with quite a few of the boys that he had gone to school with when he was at Oxford. It was standard given the fact that the brothels were watched to make sure that none of them strayed there too often. They had to get the hormones and energy out of themselves somehow, especially after a day being shuttered away in dusty rooms while listening to lectures for hours on end. Most of the boys were able to come away without a single thing to show for it other than a calmer disposition or a tighter friendship. A few of the boys that Anthony had gone to school with were apparently considering marriage, either with each other or with siblings so that they could remain close, but none of them had ended up as Anthony had.
His pregnancy had begun with dizzy spells and a heightened sense of smell. His mother had immediately recognized what had happened and forced his father to send them back to Aubrey Hall. The family usually resided in London during the season, but it wouldn’t be safe for Anthony to be out in public when he was carrying a shame in his belly. 
He touched the swell of his bump as the thought crossed his mind. He did not consider his child to be a shame, or even a mistake for that matter. He did not know who the father was, which was why they had constructed the rather convoluted plan that they had. He wasn’t able to marry the person that had gotten him pregnant, but he still loved his baby. He knew that they would be cherished even if they were going to be passed off as one of his siblings.
“I thought that you would enjoy coming hunting with me. You’ve been complaining about being cooped up in the house for days. I was sure that Benedict was going to throw himself out of a tree again,” Edmund joked. He paused when they began to crest up the small hill that brought them to a collection of flowers. It was a kindness that Anthony didn’t have to thank him for, since he was the father of seven children and knew pregnancy well.
He paused once he got to the top of the hill, placing his hand on the small of his back and the other on his stomach as he heaved in breath. At least when he was away in the country instead of attending to business in London. It meant that he was able to stay away from the specialized corset they had ordered. It was uncomfortable to have his child nestled even deeper inside of him than they already were, especially with how little room his lungs had. “I do not think that something as active as hunting is as good for me as I thought it would be,” he commented.
“You should have listened to your mother. She’s only done this seven times,” Edmund replied. 
Anthony resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He was glad that even though his parents saw this as something that was a bit shameful and needed to be hidden away from society, they still loved him enough to support him throughout his pregnancy. They had made sure that he was comfortable and had good healthcare from someone that wouldn’t spread the news of his condition throughout the entirety of the Ton. His mother had been basically glued to his side throughout the duration as well, making sure that his heartburn and morning sickness wasn’t too bad and fixing the nightmares when they plagued him.
“Speaking of the woman, I think that we should bring her back a gift. She nearly got a in a row with me yesterday night when I said that I would be taking you out today, you know,” his father explained. He handed his son the gun that had been clutched in his hand as they made their way through the paths of the forest.
He took the gun and then shifted it around so that he could hold it with his own, both of them under his shoulder. He pressed his hand to the base of his belly as he felt a tiny foot kick at his hip, as if to let him know that they were awake and wanted attention. He turned back to his father as he watched him search through the flowers until he had found one that had not a single wilting blossom, “These are your mother’s favorites. Make sure that you learn the favorite of your future spouse, Anthony.”
“I will, Father,” he replied with a small smile. He knew that his life had been turned upside down by the pregnancy, but the idea of getting to have a relationship like his parents had never failed to make him feel more chipper. He wanted to be loved and cared for by the person that he ended up marrying during the next pregnancy, whether that was carried by him or the other.
Edmund fiddled with the flower before he jerked back. “Infernal insect,” he mumbled as he tried to swat at the buzzing spot in front of him. He sucked in a tight breath as the bee stung him and he smacked at the wound to finally kill the bug. 
“Father?” Anthony asked when he noticed the sudden change in the air. He set the guns down so that the barrels were up towards the sky and he could shift a bit easier. The weight on his stomach made it exceptionally harder, but the worry that was easing its way into his veins made him almost forget that he was supposed to be uncomfortable.
“Anthony,” Edmund barely managed to get out. The wound on the side of his neck was already swelling substantially, making it look as though he had suddenly caught a case of the mumps.
“Father!” he cried out as his father took a step forward and then stumbled, falling down to his knees. Anthony lowered himself down quicker than someone that was nine months pregnant should have been able to. Despite the rapid kicking against his skin and the aching pain along the base of his spine, all he could focus on was the fact that Edmund wasn’t breathing as he was supposed to. He turned back in the direction of the house as he screamed, “Help! Someone, please help!”
His mother rushed out before he had even gotten the second word out. She had probably been pacing in the parlor that led out to the gardens while waiting for him, it was something she had begun doing more often since the doctor had confirmed Anthony’s pregnancy.
She dropped down to her knees without a second thought to her dress as she grasped her husband away from her son. She held his head in her lap and brushed her fingers over the side of his face. “Edmund, Edmund, my love you must breathe,” she instructed. He continued to gasp as his eyes slowly glazed over, becoming more indistinct.
All Anthony could do was sit there as his stomach wrapped in a nasty vice and he watched the life drain from his father. Violet, on the other hand, was going through every emotion at once. Tears rushed down her face and wet the neckline of her gown while she shouted, “Anthony, the children! Anthony!”
He forced himself to his feet and then ushered them all inside. He closed the door behind him, leaving his parents in the last couple moments that they would ever have together. His mind was still reeling with the fact that his father was now dead, had died from something so small and innocuous. They had all gotten insect bites before and yet none of them had ever died from it. 
His head was swimming with a mix of grief and panic as everything continued happening around him. He called for a doctor, refused to take the rooms that were meant to belong to the Vicount Bridgerton, and then made sure that his siblings were taken care of. Throughout the entire process, he also had to attend to his grieving mother and ignore the pregnancy hanging heavy on the front of his body.
---
Anthony brushed one of his fingers over the chapped edge of his lip. He had been worrying it nonstop since his kiss with Kate in the church, as if that would somehow rid him of the sin that he had committed. He remembered the way that the sisters, once so close to each other that they had been conjoined at the hip, looked at each other on that day. He knew that he had never had that relationship with any of his siblings, but it still made him worry. Secrets were something that tore people apart, he had seen it happen between him and Siena and then it had almost happened with Daphne and Simon. He didn’t want that to be the future that he looked forward to.
He rose from his desk and walked out into the hallway, flagging down one of the maids that was scurrying along to complete her job. She had been working with them for as long as Anthony could remember, so it felt fitting that she would be helping him during this part of his life as well. “Have Gregory and Hyacinth gone to bed?”
“No, sir,” she shook her head. The sun stayed up late during the warm summer months, which usually meant that the two youngest Bridgertons would be ushered into their beds when the light was still pouring into their windows. He wasn’t quite sure what time it was, but when it was before dark and after dinner there was always a chance that he had missed the slim margin of time that they had before they retired.
“Would you mind collecting Hyacinth for me? I have something I wish to discuss with her,” he said. He knew that this time of night his mother would be in her sitting room, reading or working on her embroidery. Eloise likely would have already retired to bed, Francesca was away in Bath again, Benedict was rarely ever home, and Gregory was meant to be studying on his own. Colin certainly wouldn’t be with their mother, which meant that she would be alone so that Anthony could actually talk to her.
“Of course, my lord,” the maid bowed her head respectfully before she set off to finish her task and then do as he had asked of her. As soon as she had, Anthony walked down the hall in the direction of his mother.
Once he got there, he gave a polite knock and entered. She was sitting on the settee near the fire while embroidering a small strip of blue cloth. It was likely meant for a baptismal dress, long and narrow enough to fit around a hem that was hanging on someone very small. She looked at peace for the first time since he had decided that he wanted to marry, which meant that he was about to ruin her evening once again. Still, he had decided that there would be no more secrets kept and that included with his mother, “Mama, I have something that I need to talk to you about.”
“Please don’t let it be another wedding, my heart can’t handle that right now,” she groaned as she set her embroidery down in her lap.
“It’s not, I can promise you that,” he chuckled as he entered. He sat down on the chair next to the window and closer to the fire, which had worse light because of the house’s positioning. “I have decided that I am going to tell Hyacinth.”
Her eyes widened to the size of the moon and her mouth dropped open with the shock of it. He didn’t think that she had been as surprised as she was now when he had told her that he intended to marry. She placed her sewing down next to her and then shuffled to the edge of the couch so that she could reach out and touch his hand. “Anthony, my dear, are you certain? She is still so young and so much has already happened.”
“I’m not going to let us be torn apart the way that the Sharmas are. I’m the head of this family the way that Kate was the head of theirs, I need to learn from her mistakes and make sure that we can all still love and trust each other,” he explained. It made his heart ache to think of the woman that he loved in such a way, but if he had learned anything from his dearest friend it was that sometimes someone could make a mistake and love could still blossom from them. The same would have to be true for him and Kate. They had made a far worse mistake than Simon and Daphne had, but things had a way of working themselves out.
He ducked his head slightly as the grief of the entire situation threatened to overwhelm him. Violet rubbed her thumb over the edge of his hand and then said, “That’s not all, is it, dearest?”
“No,” he shook his head. It was something that he hadn’t wanted to admit to himself since before his father had died, but had only traveled to the front of his brain since he had seen his sister and baby Auggie. “I want to be able to know my daughter as my daughter. I know that it could damage my reputation if word got out, but I fear that if I don’t tell her now I will always be her older brother and I will never get the chance to be her father, as I should be.”
His mother’s face softened as she reached out and placed her hand on his cheek. It felt like he was young again, barely old enough to be away from his nanny and instead with a governess. He had wanted to be held like that for so long and now he was finally getting it, which made him feel as though his heart was bleeding in his chest.
“You have always deserved to get to be her father, Anthony. I should have been there for you after she was born so that I could have helped you find the balance. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to do that, I promise to try and do better in the future,” she said. He could hear the warble in her voice that meant that she was close to crying and wished that he could hug her to make up for it. That much emotional vulnerability had to be saved for the other special lady in the house today, so all he managed to do was give her cheek a quick peck.
“Thank you for your encouragement, Mama. I’ll come and discuss it with you after it’s over,” he said.
She shook her head, “You talk to your daughter and enjoy your time with her as her father for the first time, Anthony. I’ll be fine until the morning.”
He chuckled at the implication that she would hear about it no matter what and it was simply a matter of what time. He gave her a nervous smile before he turned on his heel and walked back out into the hall. God was either smiling or frowning on him because as soon as he closed the door to the study, he heard the voice of the very girl he had been thinking about all evening. “Anthony? They said that you wanted to talk to me about something?” Hyacinth asked as she quickly jogged over to him.
He placed his hand down on her shoulder and resisted the urge to just bring her into a hug. She looked so much like him and almost nothing like the boy that had been her sire. It was a good thing that the Bridgerton boys all looked so similar, because otherwise it would have been a massive question about where she had come from. The girls all looked fairly different anyway.
“I did,” he nodded. “Come with me to my office, this is a discussion that is going to take quite a while.”
She looked at him with the knot in his brow that she had pulled directly from him, which made his heart ache in his chest. He should have done this far sooner than he had, and he likely would have had his father not died so soon before she was born. He gave a nod to the maid that had been escorting her and then guided Hyacinth the rest of the way down the hall.
Once they were in his office, he brought her over to the chairs in front of the fireplace and then sat down in front of her. “Hyacinth, before I begin I would like you to know that nothing I have ever done has been to hurt you. I love you dearly and always wanted you to be safe.”
“I know that, brother,” she giggled.
It broke his heart to hear her say that to him, every single time she had since she had started talking. He knew that was why he had pulled away from her, and subsequently his little brother, all those years ago. “If you need to stop at any point so that you can think about what we’re talking about, just let me know. I want you to be comfortable.”
She clenched her hands together in her lap and began to fidget nervously. Even though he had barely been able to spend any time with her in the last seven years of her life, he knew that she had gotten that from him. It was one of the hardest habits that he had ever had to break, one that had gotten his first tutor sent home for punishing him about. “I’m a little bit scared of this conversation now,” she admitted.
“You don’t have to be scared, I just want you to know that it’s going to be serious,” he explained. “This is something I wanted to tell you when you got older but I think that the sooner the information is out the better it will be for the entire family.”
Hyacinth pursed her lips, the perfect shape for the lipstick that Daphne favored, and looked every bit her carrier. “Alright.”
“Hyacinth, you are my daughter,” he blurted out all at once. If he had decided that he was going to do this and then taken a night or more to think about it, he might have had a better way to articulate it. He might have been able to think of a way to let her know that the discussion wasn’t a prank and was the truth without scaring her. There were so many things in Anthony’s life that he wanted to go back and fix, and yet none of them were reachable to him now.
Her lips quirked up in a smile and she tilted her head to the side, causing her near-black ringlets to go cascading over her shoulder. “What? No, silly! I’m your sister.”
“That was what we had to tell you to keep you safe,” he shook his head. “You are my daughter and you always have been.”
“But you’re not married. Mama said that babies come after someone gets married, like Daphne and Lord Mort,” Hyacinth objected.
At the mention of her favorite fiction series of the month, Anthony couldn’t help the smile that broke over his face. He would have given almost anything to have been more involved in her life so that he could know about the carrier-centered story that she was reading about to teach her more of the real world. He just shuffled forward on his chair the same way that his mother had done to him and then grasped her hand, “Babies are something that happen when one is married, but they can also happen when one is unwed. It’s not something that is supposed to happen and can only happen if one is careless with someone they are courting.”
It was awkward to have to divert around the reality of how she had come about, but she was only ten. She didn’t need to know the gritty details of how he had fallen pregnant and why they had to make the decision to hide her true lineage. She only needed to know where she really fit into the family and that she was adored beyond all belief. 
Hyacinth contemplated this for a moment, tilting her head down towards their hands and then looking over to the crackling fire in the hearth. “Wait, so Mama is really…” she trailed off.
“Yes, she is really your Grandmama. You are her eldest grandchild,” he explained.
She thought about it for a minute, kicking her feet back and forth as a way to get through the majority of her restless energy. He knew what that felt like, especially since she had plagued him with it through the duration of his pregnancy. “Is it really dangerous for people to know that you’re my papa?” she asked.
“It is,” he nodded. “The Ton and the church don’t like it when people have children outside of marriage, and unfortunately your sire had already moved to an entirely different continent by the time I found out about you. That was why we had to pretend as though you were another child from my mama and papa,” he explained.
She nodded sagely, as if this wasn’t the biggest thing that she had ever been told in her entire life. “Am I going to get to call you papa now?”
“If you would like, but only when we don’t have company over. It is something that must remain quiet, between only the family. I’m not sure that Francesca and Gregory even remember the night that you were born or the months before it,” he chuckled. It was more something that he was saying to himself, something that he was using to get through the trauma of having the secret revealed instead of living in the place inside of him that she had once taken up.
“What was my birth like?” Hyacinth asked, the question coming seemingly out of the blue.
“I’m sorry?”
“I learned about birth recently, because the heifer in the nearby village was calving when Gregory and I went on our most recent nature walk. I asked Grandmama what birth was like because Governess Sarah has no children and she told me what mine was like, but I want to hear it from you! You are the one that birthed me, aren’t you, Papa?” she asked.
She was so eagerly accepting what he had given her. He had expected that she would have taken it poorly, that she wouldn’t have believed him or would have been mad that he had taken those parental chances away from her. She seemed just excited, plain and simple. 
He should have expected that instead of fearing the worst, she had always been a chipper baby. She was also a problem when she was younger, always in the wrong position to be swaddled or to feed properly. “Come, I’ll tell you what it was like,” he said as he sat back in his chair and then patted his lap.
Hyacinth slipped out of her chair and then bounced over to him with her curls rapidly leaving the thin braids meant to contain them earlier in the day. He placed his hands on her hips and then picked her up as she jumped into his lap, placing her head down on his shoulder. Anthony brushed his thumb over her shoulder like his father had done to him every time that he had scraped his knee or a thunderstorm rolled in. His mind drifted away from him as he thought about what her birth had been like, since it was a memory that he had tried to hide away from even himself for so long.
---
A lot more went into running the estate than Anthony had originally anticipated. He had known to some extent what he had to do since he was the oldest son, even if he was a carrier, and thus had been trained on it since he had started doing upper levels in school. Seeing what his father did on a daily basis and being given some of the papers so that he could prepare was nothing compared to having to take it all on at once.
He had to make sure that the villages they oversaw on their land were being handled, that the staff was being paid, that his siblings were getting the education that they needed, that the property in London was being tended to as it needed, and that his mother was in an alright state. On top of all that, he was still wading through the last few months of his pregnancy but now sans the careful love and consideration from his parents.
He knew that his father would have been at his side through every moment of it, had Anthony not been preparing for the funeral that would take him away from them all. His mother was grieving so deeply that she barely even seemed to register that she was still breathing. Anthony desperately tried to give her the grace that she deserved in that time, but he still needed her. He couldn’t cope with the idea of having his baby without his mother by his side and yet the last four times he had woken with screaming nightmares, she hadn’t been there.
Outside of his daily tasks, what he had to do was already slowing down. He was allowed more time to rest between the bouts of paperwork that he had to do to take over the estates and title. There was to be a meeting with some of the royals at the palace, but that wasn’t something that Anthony could take until after the baby had arrived.
As if realizing that their parent was thinking of them, he felt a tiny foot punch into his back. He was exhausted and in pain, but he let a small smile cross his face as he dropped his hand down over his gravid belly to where the appendage had been. He was looking for the silver linings in his days, the things that were good around the paperwork and pain, and having them there was one of them. He could appreciate them fully now that he wasn’t constrained by the special-made corsets meant to make a bump look more delicate.
Just as it had a dozen times prior, a pain began to creep up the the base of his spine. It flared out over his hips and then spread around to his belly, grasping at every single muscle and making it contract. It felt as it did when he woke up from a bad dream or when he was preparing for one of the other boys at his school to barrel into him. He wasn’t entirely sure what it was, but his mother had assured him that was a normal thing to experience in pregnancy.
The only problem was that he hadn’t felt them with that kind of frequency throughout the entire duration and it was beginning to concern him. He wished that he could get up and find his mother or his father, that he could lean into their sides and cry while he told them how scared he was. He couldn’t, because his father had just been lowered into the ground and his mother was swimming so deeply in grief he was sure that she barely remembered his name.
So he continued working, late into the night. He rose and had dinner with his siblings as he had done every night since their father had passed away. He still couldn’t bring himself to sit at the head of the table or where their mother had sat, even if that was the place where the two people in power sat. After dinner was finished, he made sure the children were put to bed and then collapsed in his office.
The pain had only gotten worse after he had eaten, and he hadn’t managed to keep that much down. “Smith!” he called as another one of the pains began to race through him. 
The valet appeared immediately, his brows knit with worry and his body fidgeting with the urge to do something. “Yes, my lord?” he asked.
“I believe that you need to call for the doctor,” Anthony gasped out. He didn’t know what was happening to his body, but he was beginning to remember what his mother had told him. She only knew what it was like to go into labor as a woman and not a carrier, but before her grief she had tried to prepare him as best she could.
“I was wondering when you were going to ask for him, my lord,” the man said with a sharp nod of his head. He departed from the room and went to fetch the doctor, who would likely bring the midwife with him. A midwife had delivered every Bridgerton child since Anthony himself, which was why his parents had encouraged him to find one on when they found out about his pregnancy.
He left his office and went to his bedroom, changing into something comfortable and trying to ease the pain while he waited.
Anthony shifted on his bed so that he was leaning against the headboard with one hand on the bottom of his stomach. His mother had advised him on the breathing techniques that he was supposed to use and how swaying could help when he had felt the quickening, which had confirmed that a viable pregnancy was underway. He wished that she was there with him so that she could repeat the things that she had once said to him, but she was not so he had to make due on his own.
It took a while longer for the doctor and the midwife to arrive, but he wasn’t able to figure out how long that was. The only thing that existed in that time was him and his baby, and the wretched pain that kept bringing his mind away from the tiny thing growing inside of him. “We’re going to take care of you, my lord,” the midwife assured him.
“You’re about to see the most intimate part of my life, I think that you can call me Anthony,” he replied sourly. He hadn’t even looked up when they had arrived in his room, instead focusing on shifting his weight from one leg to another.
The midwife placed her hand on his lower back the way that his mother always had when she was guiding him through their home. He longed for her so badly, especially because the pain was beginning to get to him. “I want you to lay down and take off your lower clothes so that I may check you the way that I did during your last appointment.”
“I am going to step out into the parlor across the way, call me if you need assistance with the baby. I trust that Nancy will be able to handle it,” the doctor said when he realized that what was happening was a birth and not an illness that he could cure with bloodletting.
Anthony didn’t bother to say anything. Getting down onto the bed shifted the weight of his unborn babe inside of him, which meant that there was more pressure with every contraction that he got. Since he had moved from his office to his bedroom, he had accepted the fact that he was in labor despite the terror that idea brought with him. He struggled to get his pants down and then leaned back against the pillows so that the midwife could do as she needed to.
It was uncomfortable to have his cervix checked, but it was important for the delivery of the babe so he refused to let any noise of discomfort emanate past his lips. His hands grasped at the sheets underneath him and he wished that he could grasp at someone, that there was a person beside him other than the maid that had just bustled in with stacks of towels and warm water. “I think that we’re well on our way to having a baby tonight, Lord Bridgerton,” the midwife informed him. “I can already feel the head engaging through your waters, so we have to wait for them to break and then we can assess when you will start pushing.”
The entire business sounded so overwhelming that all he wanted to do was cry. He was the head of an estate and a man pregnant out of wedlock, though, so he tried not to think of it while he slipped out of the bed again. If the doctor had been the one leading his delivery then he would have been confined to the mattress, which was one of the reasons that his parents had insisted that he go with a midwife as they had. 
He was allowed to pace around the room throughout his contractions, which helped with the nervous energy that had slowly been growing inside him while he waited for help to arrive. He paused every time another one of the pains began to roll over him, grasping at something that usually turned out to be a member of the staff or the midwife herself. He was ushered back to the bed when his waters broke down his legs and she checked again. It was then that she took a step back, her face pale. 
“What’s going on?” Anthony mumbled, lost in the haze of pain and his throat aching. At some point he had begun shouting with each of the contractions when they reached their apex. It wasn’t a scream, more of a roiling groan but it was loud enough that it had torn at his vocal cords.
“I believe that the baby is frank breach,” she explained. “When I thought that I felt the head earlier, it turns out that it was actually the bum. I’m going to have to speak to the doctor, I’ll be back in a moment.”
The door swung shut and suddenly he was alone. The universe was frowning upon him because as soon as she had fully left, he had to deal with the first contraction since his water had broken. The pain of it was so much more intense now that the cushion between his muscles and the babe was gone, amplified by the fact that he was laying down instead of upright as he had been through the majority of his labor.
He was scared, above all else. He didn’t know what was going to happen from this point on. He knew only what his mother had explained to him and all of his thoughts were in a muddled jumble. He hadn’t heard of that happening during a delivery and he was scared for his unborn babe. He wanted someone to be with him. He wanted someone to hold him in their arms and tell him that it was all going to be alright.
“Mama!” he shouted before he even realized that he was doing it. He walked down to the end of his bed and placed his hands along the baseboard, gripping so tightly around the wood that he could almost hear it cracking. “Mama!”
The doctor and the midwife returned to him, both of them preparing their instruments. “My lord, we need you to answer a question for the both of us. If it comes down to it, do you want us to save the heir or yourself?”
“What?” Anthony asked, the fear radiating all the way through him. He had heard of surgeries being required to birth a baby, but he had never contemplated that happening to himself. He had always imagined the birth happening with his midwife and mother by his side, painful but endurable for the wonderful reward of getting to meet his babe properly.
“Do you want us to save you or the babe?” the midwife asked. “I don’t think that it will come down to that, but we do need to know just in case.”
“I do not want to have to choose between myself and my baby,” he cried. “I want my mother, please can someone get my mother?”
“We do not have time for that, my lord,” the midwife replied as she placed her hand on his lower back. It helped alleviate some of the pressure from his contraction like he had wanted since he had gone into labor.
He bent his head forward so that his forehead was resting on the edge of his hands even though it tilted his hips in an odd direction. He couldn’t care about the pain that was building up inside of him with every contraction, only the fact that he was scared and felt like nothing more than a child himself. “MAMA! Please, Mama!”
The midwife tutted comfortingly. She and the doctor worked to get the pillows and blankets behind Anthony on the bed before they lowered him down so that his bottom was hanging over the edge of the mattress and he was leaning back against them. It was uncomfortable and exposed him to an absurd degree, but he could barely even manage that thought around his fear. “You have to push now,” the midwife said.
“Mama!” Anthony screamed. He reached out to the side and grasped at the sheets so tightly that his knuckles turned a blinding white. He clenched his eyes shut and grit his teeth when he pushed, then used the breath that he sucked in after the contraction was done to call for his mother.
When he flopped back onto the bed, instructed not to push for a moment, he heard his brother’s voice down the hall. “Let me go to him! He’s in distress! If our mother cannot then someone must and I am the oldest after Ant,” Benedict cried. He was so young and sounded just as upset as Anthony felt. Someone was arguing with him in a tone that was much quieter, assuring him that things were underway.
He forgot it almost immediately as he was told to push again. It only took about ten minutes of the effort before the head was born from him and his body collapsed back into nothingness. He only came back to himself when the squirming, squalling bundle of baby girl was placed into his arms.
---
That memory was certainly not suited to a young child like the only curled around his torso. So instead, he told her, “It was very dark and stormy. I hurt quite a lot and I was very scared, I think I made quite the racket while trying to get Grandmama to come to me so that I didn’t have to be scared any longer. I likely kept all your aunts and uncles up all night.”
“And yet they do not remember?” she asked, seemingly astounded. He knew that she was a light sleeper and always rose when there was even someone sneezing in the room next to her, so he could understand how that was confusing for her.
“They were too young, all but Uncle Benedict. Eventually Grandmama had to get him to stay with Uncle Colin to stop them both from having a fright,” he began to pet her hair softly and she melted into him. He kissed the edge of her forehead as he continued, “I was scared because I didn’t want to let you go, but none of it mattered when you were actually there. The doctor put you down in my arms and I knew that you were going to be the smartest, prettiest girl in the entire world. And here you are, and I finally get to have you.”
She looked up at him with his own eyes, not like his siblings but the ones that he had passed down to her as she grew in his womb. “I still can’t believe that none of the others knew about this. How could they not if they were so stressed about me being born?”
“They’ve forgotten,” he said softly. “Grandmama knew, and Uncle Benedict. I think that Aunt Daphne and Uncle Colin have some memory of me being pregnant, but not enough to know what it meant.”
“Was that because Pa-Grandpapa,” she flushed and smiled like she had just been told that she was going to have a surprise party for her birthday. He knew that it was going to be a massive change for her, something that she was going to make mistakes on for a while. “Was that because Grandpapa had just died?”
Anthony felt his heart skip a beat in his chest, as if to remind him how terrifying those few moments were. “Yes. Many of the younger children forgot that time because it was so sad for them.”
She nodded and curled further against him. “I was always sad that I never got the chance to know him. Grandmama would never speak of him for longer than a couple of minutes and the stories always said that a father should be there to protect and care for his daughters.”
“The stories are right. I’m sorry that I was not there to do it during your biggest growing years, but I promise you that I wanted to be. And I am going to right that wrong going forward,” Anthony said. He tilted her head up with his hand and then planted a kiss on her forehead, which made her giggle. He was suddenly transported back to when she was only two, her arms and face still round with fat from when she had been born and sweaty with baby-sleep.
“I’m glad that I will get to know you, Papa,” Hyacinth informed him as she wrapped her arms tightly around his middle.
It was late, he needed to send her with a maid to get to bed. Then he recalled what his mother had said and decided that it could wait. For now, it was going to be only them in the light of the dying lamps, sharing the bond that only carrier and child could have. “I am too, my little flower.”
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