#why i left the church
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Churched Out: Why I Left The Church
āYou prophets tell lies. Your lies hurt good peopleāI did not want to hurt them! You support the wicked and encourage them. You donāt tell them to change their lives. You donāt try to save their lives! 23Ā So you will not see any more useless visions or do any more magic. I will save my people from your power, and you will know that I am theĀ Lord.ā Ezekiel 13: 13-23 Repost: My mom and dad raisedā¦
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I love being queer and I love being a mormon, but there are times when I'm just so tired.
#im really glad i found queerstake because i definitely would have left the church by now if not#i can't believe i went that long without any kind of community#i just guessed that there were other people like me because i couldn't possibly be the only one#but i hadnt met anyone yet who was queer a member and was planning to stay and i just felt so alone in this#i was actually on the verge of leaving and giving up when i stumbled across a post#i dont even know how it could have possibly crossed my path it was so random i really think god put it there because there is no way#especially in the moment i needed it that badly#it was just a part of a liveblog from a general conference that was especially rough on me and i saw the queerstake tag#because like. i dont want to leave. why should i have to i like it here i dont want to leave just because people dont want me here#and i just really want to be there and hopefully be fully out one day so that queer kids in the church can see me and know they aren't alon#but there are times when im just so bleh and tired and sad#vent#tw vent#queerstake
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Im absolutely loving your new Nancy Langraab story!! Hell yes for making boring townies interesting via a new backstory!! (I never found Nancy and Geoffrey much to my taste because ts4 just presents them as another boring rich couple who are probably shitty parents. But this backstory adds so much more interest and layers to her!) I canāt wait to see everything fall apart for herā¦ (Angst is my favorite part of storytelling, hahahaha) Also, I just have to say that the fact that Cassieās friends are playing D&D at a Catholic school in what would have been close to the height of the satanic panic, which very heavily targeted D&D as a horrible anti-Christian thing is very funny to me. (Not saying this to be rude, I genuinely find it amusing.)
Thank you so very much āØš I too love some good ole fashioned angst. Itās my coffee in the morning.
I did do a super quick google search prior to writing the scene and saw a few discussions about D&D and the church ( here and here and here ) because it did dawn on me that the school would have likely had an issues with it during that time period but decided to write it in anyway, as a nod to the late 80s and early 90s and as a stereotypical āgeekyā thing that Geoffrey and his friends did together. ššš¾
#tw religion#tw religious mention#tw religious trauma#ask#the art of being seen tag#I grew up in the Deep South Baptist church and I swear everything was a problem#they didnāt like Harry Potter but they didnāt ban it#it was heavily frowned upon tho#def didnāt like the gays - which one of many reasons why I left
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i know the "butch's carabiner gets caught on goth femme's fishnets" meme is making its rounds in the locked tomb fandom (as it should), but i'd like to introduce it to the blue eye samurai world
*warning: horny bullshit below the cut*
As Akemi and Taigen lean against each other at the bar, Akemi feels something pulling at the gauzy white tights she's wearing under her miniskirt. She looks down and sees that she's somehow become attached to...someone. Someone handsome. Pretty? Both?
The someone looks sharply at Akemi when they realize they're being stared at. "Excuse you," Akemi scowls. The someone scowls right back, taking Akemi aback. The someone doesn't break eye contact as they fiddle with the carabiner on their belt loop. It gets somewhat awkward as the someone realizes the carabiner isn't coming free. It's then that Taigen takes notice of the situation and stands up to puff his chest at the stranger.
"Hey, what do you think you're--" his breath hitches as the stranger's storm-blue eyes meet his, not without venom. He clears his throat. "This is my girlfriend."
"Fiance," Akemi corrects absentmindedly, taking in the stranger's lean frame, wiry with obvious muscle, and the cagey way they move. She has a strange urge to trap them, make them stop moving like they're trying to run. She supposes, staring dryly at the hardware still attached to her tights, that she has sort of trapped them, so to speak.
"Yeah, fiance. Who do you think you are, man?" The stranger raises an unimpressed eyebrow at Taigen's valiant efforts, their knife-sharp jawline flexing. Akemi catches Taigen's Adam's apple bob and a light flush spread across his face. Oh, she thinks, gears turning.
Akemi swats the stranger's still-fumbling hands away from her thigh and yanks her tights away from the hook. The tights tear with a mighty rip, revealing the smooth skin of Akemi's upper thigh to the stranger. Akemi looks up to find them eyeing the skin with very intentional blankness. When they meet Akemi's eyes, she quirks an eyebrow. "You ripped my tights," she says.
The stranger raises an eyebrow right back. They're really good at it, Akemi notices. "I ripped your tights?"
"Yeah," Taigen pipes up, "you ripped her tights? I mean, yeah, you ripped her tights." Akemi puts a firm hand on Taigen's arm without taking her eyes off of the handsome stranger.
"I think you owe me new ones," Akemi says, giving the stranger a slow once-over.
The stranger sucks their teeth. "I don't owe shit to anyone," they say, but they don't sound very convincing. Akemi smirks like a fox.
"No?" she says, faux innocent in a way that always gets her what she wants. "Not even a drink?"
"Yeah, not even a drink?" Taigen pipes up weakly. She strokes his arm and pulls him down for a kiss that startles a quiet moan out of him. She always finds it so hot when he's confused.
The stranger drags their eyes over the both of them. Then they nod gruffly at the glass between Akemi's fingers. "Vodka martini?"
Akemi sharpens her gaze. "Gin." The drink was really closer to a Vesper than anything, but this stranger didn't need to know that.
"Dry?"
"Wet."
"Dirty?"
"Extra dirty." The stranger's thin mouth, which had been set in a firm frown during the entire exchange, finally twitches with mirth.
Akemi smiles sweetly as the stranger flags down the bartender. "And scotch on the rocks for my boy, here," she says, holding the stranger's gaze as she cradles Taigen's muscled arm between her delicate hands. The stranger's eyes dip to follow Akemi's caress; they suck their teeth and meet Akemi's eyes again.
"I didn't rip his tights," they say lowly. Akemi notices that they are leaning in closer than before; she can almost feel their breath as they speak. She leans closer, speaks lower.
"But you could," she says delicately. "He'd let you." He would. Akemi could feel where he was now pressed against her back, finally caught on to what she was going for and wholly into it. As Akemi watches the stranger's resolve finally, finally crumble, her grin turns from sweet to wicked. She loves getting what she wants.
The stranger sighs harshly through their nose. "He'll have bourbon," they say, and hand the bartender their card. "Neat."
Akemi grins like a cat and hooks a manicured finger through one of the stranger's belt loops as Taigen mouths impatiently at the back of her neck. She pulls each body closer to her, running her tongue over her teeth.
"So, your place or ours?"
#this is the absolute horniest thing i've ever written and i am so sorry#i left the catholic church years ago why do i feel the need to go to confession#himbo taigen#i am a domme akemi truther dont @ me#good god why do these three make me feral#i love them all sm#blue eye samurai#mizu x akemi x taigen#mizu blue eye samurai#mizu#akemi blue eye samurai#taigen blue eye samurai#taigen x mizu#taigen x akemi#akemi x mizu#mizu x taigen
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Closeups and process video under the cut!
[Video: Timelapse of the piece, starting with a rough sketch, then a m more detailed one. Clothes are added on in a third layer, and then the piece is lined and colored in. End description.]
#FIRST POST OF THE NEW YEAR STARTING OFF STRONG#fun facts: the sketch took 8 hours / lining 3 hours and 45 minutes / coloring 6 hours and 30 minutes#this is definitely the longest Iāve ever spent on a piece in this style and the first time I've done an ensemble piece... ever?#just the sheer number of people I had to draw is part of why it took soooo long#that and my lining brush is uneven so I have to manually color everything in rather than using the paint bucket#people who draw ensemble pieces: I salute you#washās hair is lighter blonde because he fries it / donut's hair is slightly darker because he doesn't want to damage it#i have never drawn so many clothes in my life!!! good practice though#my caboose design is once again based off of amviallās because itās my favorite#I am getting mildly better at drawing an approximation of armor. I don't have the patience for accuracy#i did not use any refs besides my own FC sheet. probably shouldāve lol#i forgot a few details and had to go back two separate times to fix them: 1 was simmons arm being skin color and 2 was forgetting donut's#hearing aid (which i also realized i left off my FC sheet š©)#multifariousmediums#procreate#digital art#rvb#red vs blue#rvb art#carolina rvb#caboose rvb#grif rvb#simmons rvb#epsilon rvb#church rvb#sarge rvb#sister rvb#kaikaina rvb#tucker rvb#wash rvb
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I just had a whole actual married, mother of two adult woman be the first person older than about 21 to actually accept the fact that I don't want to get married and be willing to talk through what that means for me, instead of trying to convince me that I'll change my mind as I get older. I'm going to fucking cry
#I told her I'm lonely and why. and I told her that part of it is because I never want to get married#and so as the people I love move on to new seasons in their life I will always be left behind. because I don't ever want marriage#and she was just like ''okay. that just means you have to figure out what YOUR milestones are going to be#because that's going to look different than most of the people around you.''#I've never had an adult woman. especially not a church one. just accept it before#it's always been ''ok but everyone feels that way at your age [a blatant lie. most of the people I knew in high school#got married RIGHT out of high school] you'll feel differently in a few years''#or ''well don't shut yourself off from the possibilities!'' or ''oh but you'll meet The One''#so it's like. earthshattering for someone like this to just accept that I know my own heart in it and help me figure out what that means#for the future#like. I'm going to cry. I'm literally in tears.#Lu rambles#sorry for swearing. it's for emphasis. I'm very emotional rn
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If I hear another bullshit response like my dog is finally at home with god Iām going to burn everything in sight
And if I see another insensitive ask about my dog Iām deleting my blog
I have no patience for shit like this
Especially during the holidays
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EVERYBODY SHUT UP!!!!!! PAT SIELOFF IS PREGNANT!!!!!
1. Birthday cake from Sierra and Kelly; 2. Gritty soft serve ice cream cup; 3. Sign for Erik Johnson's 1k celebration; 4. Jersey Devil Christmas tree ornament.
#just got taken very off guard by a big room remix of mozart's lacrimosa and the experience did NOT spark joy#horrible. i keep going back to the playlist it was on and listening to 30 seconds and getting mad all over again#not bc i believe in the sanctity of lacrimosa but bc i don't like it#ko and sierra aren't responding to my messages probably because they are spending quality time with family!!#but EYE do not have quality time with family. and my brain is swiss cheese from too much church#please god let him be a girl dad do not let him have a boy to put into hockey#i mean you can put the girl in hockey but we do NOT need pat sieloff jr (boy) into hockey#pat sieloff continuing proof that every single bone in your body can be broken and you have like negative muscle ligaments#but you can still be so so so so cute and happy with your wife in pictures announcing baby sieloff š„°š„°#the weather is making me UNWELL. like physically i was not built for this weather i was built for heat not cold#BUT mentally also. please explain to me why i outlined an entire advent liturgy -- all four sundays -- based around hockey#LIKE NOBODY NEEDS A PRAYER OF CONFESSION AROUND HOCKEY#and it fucking WHIPS is the worst part. it was only an outline but if i spent more than 3 hours on it. well someone should a do wellness ch#ck is what should happen. we don't need hockey liturgy no one needs that#the thing is i am so fucking burnt out and just exhausted by all of it (<- what christmas/advent will do to a mfer) but i love#writing liturgy. it's so fun. it's like creative nonfiction#so then i was like well what if i did lent and baseball. which tracks much better yk ending the darkness and the coming light#and then i was like. interesting. what urgent tasks am i avoiding by doing all this. what medication am i not taking#white knuckling it ONE DAY LEFT OF CHURCH NONSENSE AND THEN I CAN ROT IN MY LIVING ROOM FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR#oh my god is it past midnight already i've been working on this post for like two hours and keep getting distracted#if the classical music station played ''mozart's final rave (lacrimosa)'' by oliver heldens at 7am i would certainly get out of bed :/#fresno oilers.txt
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The Greco-Bulgarian Schism in the Orthodox Church began in 1872 and lasted until 1945; it took 73 years to resolve and theyāve been back in communion with each other since.
Countless non-Orthodox, with superficial knowledge of Orthodox ecclesiology and history, making op-eds about the hierarchical schism between the Russian Orthodox Church-Moscow Patriarchate and the Ecumenical Patriarchate-Orthodox Church of Ukraine as if itās the end of Orthodoxy and we Orthodox Christians have no choice but to jump ship from the Orthodox Church and join their preferred schismatic heretical group!
I typically attend Divine Liturgy in Greek Orthodox Churches and Monasteries but on Russian feast days, I go to Russian Orthodox Churches and I can take Holy Communion in both. This āschismā is something nobody outside the Church can fully understand. Our loyalty lies not in the person of the hierarchy, in no Pope or Patriarch, but in Christ alone and the Right and Orthodox Confession of the Faith which will remain unshaken forever.
#moscow patriarchate#ecumenical patriarchate#orthodox christianity#i didnāt want to make this post but i see so many people who arenāt even Orthodox trying to shepherd people away from the truth#making it seem like there is no Church left on earth so we have to settle for something less#God help us all!#all the ships are being tossed about by the tumultuous waves of the passions but by Godās grace we find rest in the Ark of Salvation#this is exactly why ivan and alyosha couldnāt come to an understanding and why i believe that the two are symbols for the west and the east#rationalism of the west vs orthodoxy of the east
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this may be a silly question
but i dont really understand the whole The church is Bad thing in fantasy high?
like about megachurches?
as a muslim i feel like theres a lot of cultural baggage im not understanding , especially around the evangalising stuff
can someone explain?
#ITS HARD BC I CANT PINPOINT WHAT I DONT KNOW#i just know im not gettign stuff#islam doesnt have the same strucutre as christianity so i am missing things left and right#ahoys thoughts#the sol and helio stuff is confusing cause i still dont even know what a televangelist is and why is ti bad specifically#honestly maybe i should just rewatch s1#fantasy high#kristen applebees#buddy dawn#bobby dawn#why si the The Church an entity? i dont understanddd
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peace and love to the ones that dont suck but what is it about christianity that makes people need to become the most insufferable people alive
#text#where in the bible did god say to stand around campus holding signs trying to get people to talk to you and join your religion#girl im at secular college so i DONT get proselytized at.#one guy has a sign saying 'have you been hurt by the church' YES. AND I AM NOT GOING BACK.#AND I AM NOT INTERESTED IN HEARING YOU DEFEND IT. BECAUSE. GET THIS. I ALREADY HAVE BEEN IN THE CHURCH#I ALREADY KNOW WHAT IT IS. IM FAMILIAR WITH THE RELIGION. I DONT LIKE IT OR AGREE WITH IT. HENCE WHY I AM NOT PART OF IT#also why r u marketing towards people who ALREADY LEFT . are you stupid?#sorry. sorry. done now
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hate going for christian weddings sometimes because i always see the prettiest women with the ugliest men, the sermon is always some shit about wives being slaves (but not like bad slavery, mutual slavery except the husband is a benevolent master which makes it okay) and making babies for their husband, the music is always lame, the mc is always weird and obnoxious, and older women keep fucking asking me when it's gonna be my turn and never take no for an answer.
#mine#personal#brief storytime in the tags#one of my family friends got married and i was happy she was happy#her parents are like an aunt and uncle to me#i was happy to share that moment with them#we cried and laughed together#and my friends#their other daughters were on the line and looked gorgeous#it was just beautiful watching us all grow up in a way and move on to āthe nextā together#BUT#im a pastor's kid#and my dad loves weddings#he drinks them in whenever he can now especially because they make him happy and he's had to attend a lot more funerals this year#he's been burdened a lot by how many people he's had to bury and how many hospital visits he's had to do#so i was happy to see him happy too#it just all felt so bittersweet to me#because i know how badly my parents want this for me and for themselves#there was a daddy-daughters dance at some point and i could feel my dad beaming beside me watching that#and i was a little sad about it because i was like im never gonna give you that#this could be the best thing i could ever give you and i will never give you this#i can never kneel at an altar in front of a pastor and swallow that sermon#i would never marry a man in my generation#if i married a woman you and almost the entire tent filled with people that watched me grow up would not attend#my happiest day would be another funeral for you#it was worse because im kind of a small celebrity in this community because of my parents and their siblings who are politicians#so people i barely knew kept coming up and asking me when it would be my turn and how they so looked forward to the day#and i was like i love that we're a community here and i missed the pestering of aunts since i left church#but at the same time i was glad to remember why i left#there is no freedom to be myself at all with them because all they do is project their beliefs and ideas on me because that's what children
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in just one night iāve experienced a whole year of fucking war.
#the worlds worst quiz made by 80 year old tory uncle#hysterical crying all night from cousin#she ran away#came back soaked bc it was raining#had no shoes on btw#continued hysterical crying#got angry and threw a table over said 80 year old (her grandad)#drunk aunt asked why iām bisexual and told me i cannot dye my ābeautiful hairā green#(i have the most boring ass hair colour)#they left! peace!#nope!#cousin is trying to kill herself at the church in the rain bc she ran away again after table incident AND I GET DRAGGED TO DEAL WITH IT#itās only 3am.#happy new year!
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mind your own business queen
#answers#it's always the (what i'm assuming's the case here) american christians who have to shove it down your throat#there's a reason why i left the church (aside from the fact that i cannot and will not believe in it)
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people will say "cats will eat you after you die" as if thats a bad thing. i mean, feeding a hungry cat seems like a nice thing really
by the way, dogs will do this too. it is not an expression of heartlessness, it is merely animal hunger
anyways at least the body would serve a purpose rather than being sealed in a box in the ground
#yes i still believe in respecting dead bodies#my mum was made to look pretty for being put in a casket#i picked out her make-up. they brushed her hair. the church provided pretty white clothes#all for the sake of our odd human psychology#it would feel... wrong otherwise#i think my logic is... yes my mum isn't within that meat anymore. but she spent her whole life in it#so it's respectful for make it presentable#it wasn't even an open casket funeral - that would have cost 500 dollars extra for some fucking reason#anyways. if for nothing else: mum valued her appearance and it had made her sad that her sickness withered her away#so it felt extra right to give her nice make-up and pretty hair#we left her earrings on too. they were a gift from me anyways#return the silver to the earth. why not. also it's just easier to leave 'em in her ears#the coroner apparently struggled to get her ring off. but he managed and im wearing it now#this all has nothing to do with the post. im just. yeah
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I love talking to @doggogills-but-worse and just coming up with bat-shit scenarios
This Morning we have the OMAMS Foster care au
#levi#hes left alone as a child to run a church#left only with life 360 and the divine#hes immediately put into foster care#and the divine has to fordge their chosen weapon from a kid with confidence but so much trauma#lol#make it a crack fic#Divine: why are you not leading the sermon#Levi: Mom says i have to go to baseball practice#omams#levi omams#levi....
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