#why has nobody watched this movie

[sillycicle]

must... make.... the sea beast oc.... must.... make.. httyd oc.... must make.... pirate

[abutterflyobsession]

my dad about to accidentally inflict deep and lasting emotional scars on his young children: here’s a movie by the same people who made Totoro! It’s called Grave of the Fireflies

[the-acid-pear]

see the thing that gets me about the human centipede is that you're either a normie going to watch a movie and getting scared over nothing of you're a freak whos going like WHAT'S ALL THIS THEN?! and like both can backfire bc i cannot stress enough The Human Centipede is such a stupidly tame movie there's barely any blood at all but thing is what makes me be SO insane about it it's that Heiter's actor May He Rest In Peace just put his WHOLE PUSSY into playing him making it such a fucking enjoyable and hilarious movie.

Like you cannot go watch the human centipede first sequence expecting to be scared bc you'll get bored in the first 40 minutes of doomed yuri but you gotta embrace the sheer campiness of it. Nobody cares about the campiness bro. He makes chicken sounds. He makes horrible silly chicken noises. Are you listening to me.

[mydemonsdrivealimo]

what if bryce was sobbing in jensens arms. what then.

[icewindandboringhorror]

my personal Media Genres tier ranking and also Neopets Species tiers. put together in the same post just due to being adjacently related because they're on the same website lol

links to the specific tier makers: Media Genres --- Neopets

[death2you]

just finished yakuza 0…

[siobhanromee]

why does no one understand the importance of privacy any more (/nobody here)

[disneynerdpumpkin]

it's Friday the 13th, so what better day to make a Nightmare post?

Absolutely love this poster for the 3D release!

Everyone is so in character and I love it

[lastofthe20thcenturygirls]

all i need is an aman mathur who teaches me how to be happy and love life also solves all my life problems so loving life becomes possible becomes my friend and i don't need us to fall in love and also he's not allowed to die that's the only way maahi ve bonus if he looks exactly like srk those dimples help a lot

[marklikely]

barbarian fans have rapidly become the actual most insufferable people in the horror community

[spideyladman]

I hate the Paramount Network channel sometimes 'cause it can give you the most obscure movie with the most awesome song ever and you can't find it online because it is that obscure and I just

help

[rhysintherain]

Alien members of the Orca's crew react to watching Independence Day

Raiissan: attention glued to the screen in abject horror. "THIS is what the invasion was like??" Isaac has to very gently explain that this is a fictional story from before the invasion, and that from what he's heard, the real invasion was somehow both scarier and way more boring.

Zeth: thinks it's hilarious. Somehow already knows who Jeff Goldblum is.

Olivander: very confused by the concept of fiction. Keeps asking very technical questions about the alien biology. Michele frustratedly tries to explain that it's for FUN, not scientific accuracy.

Talla: critiques the humans' strategies for repelling alien invaders (since she's the only one who's ever repelled alien invaders in real life). The rest of the crew are a bit worried Olivander will be offended, but they join in, completely unconcerned that they were the alien invaders Talla was repelling.

Adran: frantically writing notes for a paper on science fiction and cultural insecurities in late 20th century Earth cinema. Has an outline, introduction, and 2-page bibliography by the time the credits roll.

Melanie: falls asleep in the first 20 minutes. Her family watched Independence Day every independence day. Neither Melanie or her parents seem to understand why that might be considered tone deaf when your adopted daughter is a literal alien.

I've seen several cases where people are like "what happens if we meet aliens, and then they see Independence Day or War of the Worlds?"

But nobody seems to think about what happens when the aliens see Star Trek.

The aliens are gonna see these shows made by a bunch of humans but they put putty on some of the humans to make them look like what we think aliens might look like, and we told stories about how those aliens would be our friends and we'd explore the universe with them and find more aliens and try to be friends with them too!

Yeah sometimes they'd be mean and we'd fight but we'd always try to avoid it and even if we fought we'd try to be friends later.

We basically created 900 episodes of a child's drawing of a stick figure of a human and a stick figure of a grey alien holding hands and "best friends" written in crayon.

[warthogreporter]

And now, a brief look at the human fucker community on a monster version of tumblr

🐙 WetterThanYou Follow

It's so sad that humans can't breathe underwater, makes bringing them to my lair so much harder

👺Ascetic-more-like-ass-cetic Follow

Was anyone going to tell me humans can't breathe underwater or was I supposed to just learn that from a text post?

🐙WetterThanYou Follow

Please tell me you didn't seriously look at humans and go 'they look like they can breathe underwater'

👺Ascetic-more-like-ass-cetic Follow

I thought they were like lions and how some live in the sea :(

🦁BEaST-MAN Follow

DID YOU THINK SEA LIONS WERE LITERAL LIONS?!

👺Ascetic-more-like-ass-cetic Follow

They're not? 😭😭😭

(10,053 Notes)

🐺HereWolf Follow

Vampires will be like 'I love humans' and then transform every human they know into another vampire. Weak. You are like someone who only watches Marvel movies and calls themselves a filmbuff.

🏏Batass Follow

Hey OP this is an important part of many vampire cultures so you should tone it down because this is really offensive.

🐺HereWolf Follow

You should get a culture that isn't fucking lame.

🦁BEaST-MAN Follow

OP you are literally a werewolf. And into throwing stones in glass houses I guess.

🐺HereWolf Follow

Gurl you don't know the amount of effort I put into keeping my human girlfriend a human girlfriend because I love her for being a human.

(8,000 Notes)

💚CraftedLove Follow

In the club on a date with a human straight up breaking it. And by 'it,' haha, well. Let's just say. His sanity.

(42,069 Notes)

🧙‍♂�� Crystal-Rooster-and-Orbs Follow

Sick of getting added to group chats like 'plots to overthrow our lieges.' Yes, I am both an evil wizard and an evil vizier. But I'm not plotting any treachery because my king is also evil, and so is my queen. We are in an evil polycule and give each other evil night kisses.

🧙‍♂️ Crystal-Rooster-and-Orbs Follow

Also stop telling me about the evil queen's OnlyFans like the king and I aren't helping her run it. Who do you think is taking the pictures? You have no idea how many evil yet deeply impractical schemes it's given us the economic cushion to do.

(48,835 Notes)

🤼‍♂️Bitch-of-Heracles Follow

Need me a human who will hold me like this and just destroy me 😍

♣️HeraclesOfficial✅ Follow

Hey.

🤼‍♂️Bitch-of-Heracles Follow

WHY DID NOBODY THINK TO WARN ME HERACLES WAS ON THIS WEBSITE?!

(33,333 Notes)

This now has a sequel, and a third act

[godforg1veme]

Funny how JG (the epitome of sexism in all of its forms) is worse at his own job than LR (a woman)

[that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick]

Look Chan I know we've all been single for a while here but I don't think you understand the concept of Valentine's Day

[starpros-sunshine]

I genuinely think the reason I have like. Zero mental illness really is just that I have stopped taking myself seriously aeons ago. Atp if I fuck something up in an embarrassing way I just make a dumb joke about it and then pretend it never happened and if anyone brings it up I just make a dumb joke about it and shrug it off because let's be real we can't be sure anything else is and if I'm the only real thing out there then what do I care for the opinions of some figments of my subconscious and if they all are actually real then it's no use beating myself up over past fuckuperies. The real way to be at least somehwat well adjusted is to just stop caring about all of that.