#why didn't I do this sooner?

[fandomsarefamily1966]

Me, thinking about George Harrison: Why was everyone sleeping on him while we still had him? WHYYY

Me, thinking about Neil Peart: Why was I sleeping on him while we still had him? WHYYYYY

[asher-is-a-idiot]

THE ASK BOX IS OFFICIALLY OPENED!

[dailyrandomwriter]

Day 563

Something in my brain clicked in the past two weeks.

A good portion of it was because of the ADHD medication, but not in the way most people would assume.

Here is the thing about taking ADHD medication, and having it work for you, after years of thinking you’re just kind of hopeless.

First, is that you realize that the long periods of time it had taken you to do fucking anything is not normal. Sitting like a bump on a log for 30 minutes, one hour… two hours… an ungodly amount of hours isn’t something most people do.

Second, this explains why my co-workers can have a job and have kids. I still think having both for myself is an overwhelming idea, but I now have a better idea of how they can manage it, because there is more time in the day than I realize.

Third, I am not as hopeless as I thought I was, and I’m slowly learning I am also not as lazy as I was led to believe.

Finally, having the medication work so starkly has given me permission to say, yes I have ADHD and I should email/text myself a reminder before I forget (you dumbass). Yes, I will call myself a dumbass, because for the past 20+ years I have unconsciously lived my life like I wouldn’t forget something the moment it left my brain matter. 

To be fair, for the most part, my memory has always been relatively good even outside of my fixations. There is a reason why I can do my job, because I have a good recall memory, however, I have a bad short term memory. If I get interrupted in the middle of doing something or I get told to do something but cannot do it right away there is less than 50% chance I will remember to do the thing.

Which was why, coming back to work, after a second week of being on the medication I decided, fuck this, I am emailing myself so I won’t forget. At least a dozen of those emails in my work inbox are probably from me. Either because I got interrupted and wanted to remember where I was at, or because I said I would do a thing but not doing it right that second.

It took a load off my brain I didn’t know existed, and it’s a practice I really need to learn to do more in my personal life.

(I also should maybe warn my co-workers to stop messaging me with tasks and email me instead as a default.)

[hey-hey-j]

"So BroZone wants to turn this into a real battle of the bands? Then let's battle!"

(★ my Kofi)

[digitalclaws]

The devil on my shoulder: "Why don't you make one of K-"

UGH OK FINE. FINE! Custom Kieran Pokedoll plush tags.

[54625]

FITMC TOLD ME TO SHUT UP

dude why the fuck have I just been silently lurking for the past year chatting is so much fun literally what have I been doing this whole time

[lastofthe20thcenturygirls]

two people too closed off to everyone met through their love for a game she was the first face he saw they fell in love both of them not being people of too many words never could tell each other to be with him she ruined her reputation they got separated due to circumstances had a child born out of love couldn't meet again due to people this time neither of them could raise their child not together nor alone a child who would grow up to feel next to nothing for them one spent her life succumbing to madness and illness the other living in guilt and loneliness... a tragedy if there ever was one

[the-stove-is-divorced]

Remembering I can draw fanart for my own fics, SO BEHOLD! The most mentally sound halves of a fusion imaginable! Technically a redraw of art I did way earlier for the same fic! Flexing my art muscles and thinking about these two is good for the soul. Love them. Bastards to write though. I can't wait to write them fused back together, but we're not here yet and it's AGONY.

[purgaytorysupremacy]

oh nuts. a life experience has given me a new layer of perspective on Cas's homosexual declaration of love to Dean.

recently I had occasion to tell a person I had feelings for them knowing full well they didn't feel even a twinge of the same thing for me. while the whole thing was a decidedly unpleasant experience, I kept laughing at myself internally bc I didn't want to say "the happiness is just in saying it" like fucking Castiel over here. (we don't need to talk about it, it's fine.) (I am happier having said it and it's kind of bullshit, but I digress.)

because the thing is, the happiness isn't in just saying it, right? the happiness is in the having. I made a whole TikTok "proving" that the Empty didn't come for Cas when he confessed his love, but rather when he realized Dean loved him back. even for Cas, the happiness was in the having, not in the saying, however brief it was.

and I've always been one of those people who rolled their eyes at the whole concept. why would the happiness be in just being, in just saying it, if it's right there in front of you to have. and then it hit me like a tonne of bricks (as I was washing my kitchen counters).

Cas really didn't think he could have Dean.

at all. in any capacity. he really, truly, and honestly felt to the depths of himself that Dean did not have any twinge of similar feelings, that this really was a Hail Mary shot-in-the-dark. and I think me, personally, really didn't understand that about Cas. that his belief in his love being unrequited was that unshakable.

something else I've been pondering is how audiences have so much more empathy for fictional characters who share traits that IRL they find objectionable and unappealing. but the thing is about fictional characters is that we follow them around in their most private, vulnerable moments. we see Dean mourning Cas when he dies, literally killing himself because he can't live without him, but it's so easy to forget that we're the omniscient ones here.

Cas never knew.

Dean's whole thing was pushing him away, keeping him at arm's length, making it seem like whatever heroic thing he does for Cas he'd do for anyone. he downplays how important it is for Dean to share the Deancave with him, to show him his favourite movies, share his favourite songs. he acts like the things Cas does for him don't mean that much to hide how much they do mean. he uses "we" whenever he even gets in the vicinity of expressing a feeling. "We were worried." "We're glad you're back." "We needed a win." "You're our brother." The audience knew the difference. We saw how he'd clench his jaw or swallow hard or make a face that said "God, I'm being such an idiot". Because we saw him in those little moments. We got to see the cracks in the mask.

but Cas never knew.

the self-hating angel of Thursday was never going to think it was all a way for Dean to protect himself. obviously, that's the delicious tragedy of it all, but what I think I realized at the end of all that is Cas confessing his love to a Dean who didn't love him back wouldn't have worked. Because the happiness really is in the having. If happiness was just in saying it, then The Empty would have come before Cas even finished getting the words out of his mouth.

so Cas's plan wouldn't have worked if Dean didn't love him back.

this is just me yapping on about my own nonsense, but I do think it's really interesting. there's contentment in "just saying it". there's freedom and relief and an unburdening. I think one can argue that it makes being happy in the being easier. there is certainly some joy in telling a person you think that highly of them. but true happiness?

nah.

true happiness is always going to only be in the having. Cas didn't understand the difference until he experienced it, and by then, it was too late.

[shyein3812]

I'm so late but. I truly love how expressive this father-son duo is

(Designs might be a bit incorrect, didn't get a clear view of them ingame. But. Oh well, it's a doodle aokwdijhwa)

[shiftingexpanse]

I just remembered this is a light dragon. She's desperately trying to hop flights apparently

[araneitela]

Alright, I've been mulling on this for most of the day, and unless a night's sleep changes my mind, I'll be working on returning (remaking) a very old multimuse of mine, that used to be over at iniziare. The blog will be entirely remade, and I'll post it here when it's done!

For those wondering, it will for now house: Guizhong, Yelan, Kafka and Arlecchino. Time to finish up that other WIP theme for this, I suppose! See you guys on the flip-side of this brighter future.

[simplepotatofarmer]

oh that felt good :)

[dr-jingles]

Redraw of an old Cyril outfit I liked (Old art)

[blossom-of-kaleidos]

woah daenos art in 2024? crazy,,, but i've been wanting to get one of pixelpeony's ych comms for a REALLY long time, and clearly i was right to because the art i got back from her is SO dang cute 🥹

[bitimdrake]

I think I finally figured out what frustrates me about the excuse that Bruce isn't abusive because he's usually being mind controlled or something is that... There's no apology afterwards. Nothing to see if Dick's okay. Cause mind controlled or not, Dick still got hit by his father and that has consequences. So if Bruce was a *good* father wouldn't he want to make sure that this wouldn't effect thier relationship?

So true!!! I mean the "he's usually mind controlled" argument already doesn't hold up, because, hey guys, even once not mind controlled is Bad. But, yes, even when Bruce is absolutely not to blame for physically hurting his kids, he still handles it awfully once he's back in control.

But mostly this ask makes me think of Teen Titans Year One, where Bruce is mind controlled, but--

--the way Dick reacts kills me. Because there's no immediate thought that Bruce must be mind controlled, no moment of Dick pushing back. He's just. sad.

And then when the situation is resolved, Bruce just berates him for not figuring it out faster :(