#why bitchman

[hellomagicalsouls]

im still pissed about season 4 umbrella academy. it was such a let down that i can't even read fanfiction anymore. because i remember how BAD it was. i literally am struggling to think of aspects i liked. ive also lost my moots which sucks bad.

[bitimdrake]

I think I finally figured out what frustrates me about the excuse that Bruce isn't abusive because he's usually being mind controlled or something is that... There's no apology afterwards. Nothing to see if Dick's okay. Cause mind controlled or not, Dick still got hit by his father and that has consequences. So if Bruce was a *good* father wouldn't he want to make sure that this wouldn't effect thier relationship?

So true!!! I mean the "he's usually mind controlled" argument already doesn't hold up, because, hey guys, even once not mind controlled is Bad. But, yes, even when Bruce is absolutely not to blame for physically hurting his kids, he still handles it awfully once he's back in control.

But mostly this ask makes me think of Teen Titans Year One, where Bruce is mind controlled, but--

--the way Dick reacts kills me. Because there's no immediate thought that Bruce must be mind controlled, no moment of Dick pushing back. He's just. sad.

And then when the situation is resolved, Bruce just berates him for not figuring it out faster :(

[i-have-the-best-url]

REALEST REPLY

now that shitstorm of a fourth season has been out for awhile i intend to ask the real questions. like why the FUCK did they give 5 a twink

[aeightyone]

imaginary amv in my head about micheal and nicholas to in the future, about micheal’s decision to use the █̵̩̼̐̿█̶͙̤͓̆͜█̷̢͓̣̟̿͂█̷̩͠█̷̡̒█̷͉̥͍̽ ritual on his child before birth, and his imagining of the future before and after his sickness.

Anyway despite his fuckedupedness, I genuinely believe that Micheal didn’t want to kill Nick if he felt he had an alternative- there’s a reason he razed a whole pocket of reality to attempt to create a mirror son in his place (as well as an addition to the colonialism metaphor but that’s another post). Whether he genuinely loved him, or simply didn’t want to destroy what he viewed as another creation of his, there was something there. We know his father loved him, and that he grew up practicing rituals with Oscar. If Micheal hadn’t intended to use Nick for the █̵̧̪̣͠█̵̨̤̲͂█̵͔͓̈́̕█̸̛̼̐͊█̷͇͒  , would his childhood have been the same?

[tarheelsk]

I think it'd be funny if he knew nothing about the Gotham vigilantes, and Batman mentioned the name Red before he got cut off by Box Ghost showing up in Amity. How hard would it be to figure out?

Phantom, Zeta-ing into the Cave: "sorry about that, Batman, had one of my locals to clean up. Now, where's the Red one?"

Batman: "Hng." (I've called in Red Hood, he should be here in 15 minutes.)

Phantom: "...hng means nothing to me, sir, so I assume they'll be a little bit? Since you didn't, gesture anywhere?"

Red Robin, pulling into the Cave on his bike: "hey B, need to borrow your Chem analyzer, mine's on the fritz at the Nest. Who's this?"

Phantom, neck turning farther than it should to look at him: "wow, alright Batman, I see why you called me. Why do you have like 4 different death marks on you, Red?"

Red Robin, backing up: *snaps his fingers* "You're that new guy with the League, right? The ghost? What do you mean by death marks?"

Phantom: "I mean the fact that if you didn't have these curses put on you in the exact order they were, they wouldn't be fighting for dominance and you wouldn't make it to double digits in age? How do you not know? There's like 3 separate cultures here, were you raiding tombs at age 5 or something?"

Batman: "*concerned 'mh?'*"

Red Robin, much more nervous: "well, my parents were archeologists-"

Phantom: "Oh, yeah, that'd do it."

Red Hood, finally arriving, lightly singed: "Hey Bitchman, got done, where's the spook you wanted me to see? He the one giving the Replacement the third degree?"

Phantom, whipping his head to look at Hood, then at Batman: "he has a different problem, but at least he knew about it! Why do you have two of them?!"

DP x DC Prompt #9

When Phantom joined the Justice League, he wasn’t prepared to be approached by Batman of all people. He had been warned to not take everything Batman says to you personally, but that he was a great hero.

Batman had a request. A simple one, at least according to Batman. He asked Phantom to meet an anti-hero who had come back from the dead and had some … nasty side effects.

Phantom, intrigued, agreed. Batman set a time and place, and Phantom showed up. But, Phantom thought Batman had said the one in the red helmet was the undead.

He doesn’t understand why everyone freaks out when Phantom approaches the vigilante with half a cowl dressed in black and red. This boy reeked of death, did Batman seriously not know?

[itstonyowo]

wow i love batman.......i hate him LOL

[gender-euphowrya]

cracks me up in therapy when they explain basic psychology 101 to you like “this is how your brain works :) this is how trauma can affect you :)” like i get it it’s useful information for people who may not be aware of these things but susan i psychoanalyze myself every time i blink

[gothamcitytrash]

Book Club

Barbara holding Jason by the ear : TELL HIM WHAT YOU DID

Jason freeing himself : i didn’t do shit

Barbara : really? try again

Jason : i didn’t do anything illegal

Bruce : jason? what’s happened

Barbara glaring at jason : go on

Jason softly : i was at book club

Barbara : WITH

Jason : Harley

Barbara : AND

Jason : Ivy

Barbara : KEEP GOING

Jason : Bane

Bruce : what?

Barbara : he was at book club with Harley , Ivy and Bane

Bruce : I know why i’m angry , he shouldn’t be friendly with the rogues, but why are you?

Barbara : they didn’t fuckin invite me Bitchman

[gabriel-of-mandela]

i think your problem with me is ur homophobic. U just hate gay people. Thats why ur fucking w us. Ur homophobic. Hater of the lgbts. Little bitchman

I am actually very accepting of the LGBTQIA+ community! I suppose I am technically part of it myself, being a genderless entity.

Now, isn't that interesting... :)

[jonathanssweatercollection]

stranger things s4 volume 2 thoughts. profanity warning lol

* i’m sick to fuckin death of yuri. when is he dying

* steve talking about having a big family is like. obviously fan service but i love it and also i’ll be using it for stoncy fuel bc fuck you

* i need nancy to break jason’s nose

* i also need el to brutally eviscerate brenner in ever horrific way she can manage

* argyle nolastname is my best fucking friend. like what IF nina was a small woman. let’s hear him out

* why the fuck wasn’t jonathan included in the byers-hopper sibs hug. i’m mad. i’m gonna fucking bite someone

* why the fuck are the duffers so against jonathan being hugged by his family. i’m gonna kill

* MAN I THOUGHT THEY WERE GONNA RUN BRENNER OVER. MISSED OPPORTUNITY (though at least the cunt is dead)

* robin didn’t have to go out of her way to get that fruity little beret but i’m so glad that she did

* i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. max mayfield i would kill for you

* “take your hands off me, potatohead” okay i still want him dead but that was funny as fuck of yuri

* I THOUGHT THAT I SAW HOPPER’S ASS. POINTED AT THE SCREEN AND YELLED “BUM”

* TWAS HIS FUCKING ARMPIT

* yay hopper kiss <3 good for them :)

* robin helping nancy up the rope <33 that’s so cute

* omg omg theyre playing the score from previous seasons

* god i feel so fucking unwell. i’m so anxious and jittery what the fuck

* EL’S LITTLE DRAWING OF MAX ON THE VAN WINDOW 😭 I’M GONNA COMBUST THAT’S SO FUCKING CUTE 😭 THE LITTLE CURLS AND THE LITTLE SMILE

* argyle voice: my dude is a gender neutral term of endearment

* JONATHAN SAID MY DUDE. HE’S BRIBING PEOPLE WITH WEED. HE’S HOLDING A BLUNT IN A WAY THAT NO ONE HAS EVER SMOKED WEED HAS EVER HELD A BLUNT. THIS IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

* robin rly runs like a weirdo i love her

* st@ncybaitgate: *happening ig* // my mother: “don’t” // me: “don’t” // my mother: “don’t” // me: “don’t do do it” my mother: “don’t” // me: “don’t i’m begging you” like a fucking greek chorus

* ugh my family are so fucking mean about the characters’ looks. it’s even worse when theyre making fun of the kids’ appearances

* lumax are making me so emotional i’m gonna throw up

* el being a pineapple on pizza truther. makes so much sense

* her and argyle teaming up to feed mike pizza nd chanting “try before you deny” <33

* BYERS BROS BYERS BROS BYERS BROS BYERS BROS

* MY BOYS. MY BOYS ARE SO GOOD

* i love el’s socks

* oh man she’s gonna have wet jeans. has she not had a bad enough day already

* max praying for bad things to happen to b*lly and him dying. so true same bestie like me too exactly

* max and el being foils particularly in regards to the abuse theyve suffered and in turn the deaths of their abusers. so fucking true

* sadie is giving an award worthy performance to a light. she is one of the greatest young actresses of our generation i mean this wholeheartedly

* ELMAX RIGHT ELMAX RIGHTS LET’S FUCKING GO ELMAX RIGHTS HELL YEAH

* omg are we finally gonna learn why max had to move to hawkins. pls i wanna know

* FUCKING HELL THAT PIECE OF SHIT IN JASON’S GANG FUCKING TACKLED ERICA. THAT’S AN ELEVEN YEAR OLD YOU CUNT. SHE BETTER SUE HIS ASS

* omg the snowball my beloved <3

* i can’t tell if theyre doing an aliens homage. if so fuck yea

* steve’s little dancing jumps 🥹 hopscotch king

* ROBIN HOLDING NANCY’S HAND BC SHE’S NERVOUS AWW

* “a memory inside a memory” my guy argyle is gonna fucking love inception

* “i’m not having another funeral” yes this is a kinda funny line on surface level but also my fucking god that’s such a tragic thing to say. joyce byers you deserve the world

* the hawkins group spent like at LEAST over a hundred dollars on all of their ammo and shit and dustin nd eddie are fighting for their lives with sticks, little bitch knives and bin lids

* steve handing nancy her gun. yes bitchman that is true malewife behaviour <3

* i’m surprised by the restrained amount of swearing this season. like this is all very s2 in the way that nobody has said fuck but everybody has said asshole at least thrice

* basically i want max to call vecna a cunt

* i fucking knew eddie was gonna sacrifice himself. this fucking himbo

* oh fuck the sound design is so moody and cool i love it

* SINCLAIR SIBLINGS BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF PPL IN QUICK CUTS. YES

* MAX VOICE: MY GIRLFRIEND’S BACK AND YOURE GONNA GET IN TROUBLE HEY YAAAAA HEY YAAAAAAAA MY GIRLFRIEND’S BACK

* the steve and lucas parallel of getting their heads smashed with cutlery. kings

* “I PIGGYBACKED FROM A PIZZA DOUGH FREEZER” “what” POTENTIALLY A CONTENDER FOR THE BEST EXCHANGE OF THE SEASON

* “IF YOU TOUCH HER AGAIN I WILL KILL YOU. AGAIN” EL I WILL FUCKING DIE FOR YOU SHE’S SUCH A GOOD GF

* ELMAX AS FOILS IN REGARDS TO THE ABUSIVE BROTHER FIGURES AND DESPERATELY SEARCHING FOR PROTECTION IN THE PPL THEY LOVE BUT RUNNING AWAY AND CLOSING THEMSELVES OFF BC THEYRE AFRAID OF FEELING VULNERABLE AND GETTING HURT AGAIN

* YES this mindflayer shit is lovecraftian. this greatly appeals to the horror fanatic in me

* mike’s proclamation of love literally sounds like wedding vows this is so fuckign precious i love them so much

* MAX’S ARMS

* NO NO NO NO THEURE NOT DOING THISGHEYRE NOT

* THANK FUCKING GOD MAX IS ALIVE

* murray saving hopper parallels steve saving jancy in 1x08. bc i say so

* everything is about polyamory. fuck you

* why the FUCK is there a sword. so conveniently placed next to hopper. like i know why but. i’m???

* i mean i’m not complaining bc it’s cool tbh

* YES RUNNING UP THAT HILL SYNTHWAVE STRANGER THINGS REMIX LETS GO

* nancy shooting the living fuck out of vecna is the hottest thing i’ve ever seen. i’m proposing

* the jopper hug im so fucking emotional

* omg is vecna michael myers-ing them

* “I THINK ITS MY YEAR HENDERSON. FINALLY MY YEAR. I LOVE YOU” FUCKING GOD ARE YOU KIDDING ME

* THE RETURN OF THE MOBY SONG

* MAX BETTER BE OKAY

* I’LL KILL KUSELF OLEASE FONT DONT DIE PLEASE MAC PLEASE LELADE MAX LLADEAD PLEASE MAC OLEASE PLEASE I’lL LILL MUSELF PLEASE I’M GONNA FUCKING FIR PLEASE PLEASE I’m GONNA DIE PLEASE MAX NO PLEASE PLEASE GOD FUCKING DAMN IT

* the gate opening up through jason made me fucking laugh tho

* OH FUCK THIS IS EPIC

* fucking elmax rights yet again

* BRING HER BACK BRING HER BACK OKEASE BRING HER BACK

* TWO DAYS FUCKING LATER ???????????

* omg the leaving hawkins sign my beloved

* none of the cali gang have changed their clothes in like a week. that van will reek

* “quaint town of hawkins” bitch how many murders have happened here over the past four years

* THE FUCKING LIBRARY NO. THAT’S MY HOUSE

* NANCY’S MR RABBIT. I LOVE WHEN SHE HAS STUFFED ANIMALS

* IT PARALLELS JONATHAN BEIBG FORCED TO HUNT A RABBIT WHEN HE WAS A CHILD BY HIS DAD. BC RABBITS ARE CLEARLY A SIGNIFICANT PART OF HOW THEY REMEMBER THEIR CHILDHOODS. FUCK I HAVE TO MAKE A GIFSET

* STONCY STINCY STINCY OLEAEE I STONCY STIBCY OLEASE STONCY STONCY PEASE STIVFY stONCY OLEPASE

* FUCKING YES MAX ISALIVE

* YES HE’S READING HER STEPHEN KING FUCK UEAH FUCK YEAH

* el’s little ET hoodie bless

* love all the little parallels of calling things miracles this season

* let’s give a hoot and a hurray for neurotic lesbian representation

* EDDIE’S UNCLE IS GONNA MAKE ME CRY. WHAT THE FUCK

* they need don’t mess around with jim playing the background of them cleaning up the cabin

* jonathan still looks at nancy with these shy lovestruck puppy eyes after all these years. someone kill me

* “OTHERWISE WHO WOULD BE IN CHATGE??? STEVE??” STONATHAN CRUMBS LETS GO

* okay fuck its the coca cola bottle el and max played with in s3. im sad

* max better fucking be okay. i’m so fucking worried for her even now

* JESUS GOD THE EL AND HOPPER REUNION IS MAKING ME FUCKING CRY

* “what do you think?” // “bitchin” I’M GONNA KERPLODE

* YES YES HUGS ALL AROUND FOR EVERYONE YES EVERYONE HUG

* argyle is still hunting for mushrooms while dimensions are colliding isn’t he

* can dustin please have a cane. please my poor guy just give him a cane to help him out please

* the fucking score RULES

* my mother after watching this episode “so the upside down is in the downside up”

* hell FUCKING yea siouxsie and the banshees to close up the season this rules

* seeing the monkey massacre logo always fills me with joy. god fucking bless and goodnight

[yoikami]

Has anyone seen the joke fake David where he has a massive schlong

Oh my god

[briarrosescurse]

OMGEE HAI... PLEASE... I NEED TO KNOW...! What happens in the Briar Prickler route.

YES YES who am i to deny the bitchman himself...!!

general outlook: i'd like to think that briar's route would be a rather grim one to approach...? basically, i was thinking that, if my ocs were in a dating sim, briar's route is one that isn't really recommended to play from the get-go, because he would have a much more increased difficulty compared to the others. not the hardest, but def on second or third place. (that is, if you want to achieve a good ending with him)

it's hard to ever really pick the right answers with him, especially at the beginning. i feel like the first impression you leave on him as well as how the first conversations go are very essential to how the route will develop and just... even determine the tone of the route? I FEEL LIKE. while his attitude may either remain as grouchy as ever, get worse or tends to go a little "softer" (as soft as it gets with him) with time, the genre can just. shift into different directions.

it's like no answer really pleases him, so i think you just kinda have to hope and cross ur fingers that he doesn't entirely dislike u, because of how vague he is. i feel like that's what would get people frustrated with him LMAO

good ending: if you are gunning for a happy ending with him, then i think you'd have to pick the answers that would provide a different outlook, so to speak...? it might clash with his stance A LOT at first, but throughout the course of the route, it becomes clear that he values your opinion and your thoughts, thus seeming more receptive to you and opening himself up to you. obvs his route wouldn't be a "my partner is my therapist" route or anything, things just can't be fixed like that BUT i think there'd more a little brighter, even more hopeful undertones. (imagine an ending cg where u see a rare smile on his face; albeit a tired smile, he seems satisfied enough)

bad ending: it'd be, unfortunately, so easy to slip into a bad ending with him, where he develops clear disdain for you... it's not even a dramatic, big ending, but it's more just a. well. that was it of him. you're not gonna get a glimpse of him again. he doesn't want to see you. it's almost a little heartbreaking, but it's not like he really cares, at that point. at the end, you'll be another of thousands of faces in his long life and he makes sure to let you know that. (i.e. he's a bitch abt it)

if you wanna spice it up, i feel like he deserves a secret ending where ur like his past lover or someone he knew before LMAO like a reincarnation or smth... it wouldnt be so on the nose tho, smth more subtle. he isn't a man of dramatic, grand schemes, so that ending would not be grand either. and i would also say that his route would be one of the longer ones, maybe diving rather deep into topics that are ur late night talks at 2 am, contemplating life and shit. a route that makes u theorize on the overaching themes and what exactly is going on with him or smth, "why is briar prickler like this: a thread" LMAOOOO

[starshiprangerash]

I have come up with three possible reasons why Bitchman hasn't drawn C!Tubbo yet

1) He's scared of us (unlikely becuase this man fears nothing )

2) Tubbo is popular, but not Popular. Dream, George, Ranboo, and Tommy get on the trending page regularly so he can capitalize on the fact drawing them will get him attention. Whereas drawing Tubbo won't get as much. (possible because Geogre Lore trended this week)

3) He has no idea how to draw him. Is he human? Is he goat? what kind of goat? sheep possibly? why are there flowers in his head in this drawing? dragon? What eye color do I use blue? grey? brown? purple? Hair should be simple he's blonde? brunette? neoplotain? (very possible, also includes the chance of him accidentally drawing Tweek fanart)

[dsmpdaily]

I LOOKED UP BITCHMAN'S QUACKITY AND IM CR Y ING WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE THAT WHO HURT HIM????? 😭

-a bitch who rly likes villain arc quackity, go off king

so true he gave him the whole ass timmy turner haircut

[sand-does-stuff]

Why does b**ch bitchman's drawing of tommy look like that. Why did he take away genderman's gender. The questions I ask myself as I look through my dash.

[angel-archivist]

You!!! You get it!! Spider-Man films/shows peaked with Spectacular Spider-Man! That show was my childhood and it the mcu wishes it had anything similar. Peter trying to balance being a hero with being a working high schooler. And the villains weren’t continuous copies of “people who where hurt by this billionaire but just decide to be horrible, let’s not address the root cause”

EXACTLY THERE WERE ACTUAL COMPLEX RELATIONSHIPS!!!!! The characters who were protagonists and then got hurt, arent just like “ohhhh i am so evil im going to do sooo many unforgiveable things despite my motivation being valid” a lot of the time it was because of the working condiitons they were under, the pressure to perform by higher ups, the unsafe working conditions causing them harm, or just their literal bosses abusing them!! Doc Ock, Dr. Connors, Electro (i think) all faced abuse from their jobs or the professions they were in just *shakes the mcu* why cant you be good why cant you be spectacular spiderman, where you want to see those who were hurt get better and the show (mostly) agrees, and where you want to see the capitalist bitchman finally get whats comign to him!! Where you show that sometimes things dont work outn in the end!! Dr. connors was saved but he had to leave new york after that :(( where Aunt May was able to pay her medical bills but only because she sold the rights to her cook book, its jsut SUCH A GOOD SHOW.. it has its flaws but its LEAGUES above the mcu spiderman